It’s less dramatic than it sounds. It doesn’t feel like a terrifying chasm in my awareness. It doesn’t hurt. The words are on the tip of my tongue. It’s still there, I just can’t bring it to mind right now, like when you come up with a really brilliant thing to say when someone else is talking and by the time they stop it’s gone but you can feel the thread of it, the place where it ought to be, and if you could just follow the clew again you’d have it. This kind of thing is to be expected when you’re conscious while someone messes around in your brain.