There was a little surf rolling in—breakers all of a meter high or so. A couple of pale tourists were trying to catch those waves on surfboards garishly emblazoned with the name of the company that had rented them out. It looked like an awful lot of work just to get wet. As we cruised slowly on, I saw one slag—an ebony-haired elf with ivory skin—actually get up onto his surfboard and ride it . . . for a whole two meters before he submarined the nose and went sploosh .