I was so engrossed with my morbid thoughts that by the time I looked up, I’d gone onto my neighbor’s property. He was a surly bastard and hated the fact that he had an elf for a neighbor. What was it he called me? Ah yes, a pointy-eared, pencil-necked, daisy-eating nigger. The last I assumed had to do with my skin color. It took every ounce of self-restraint I had not to slowly pull his tongue out his hoop the hard way.