Indexing: force refresh when versionMap is using too much RAM

If the user sets a high refresh interval, the versionMap can use
unbounded RAM.  I fixed LiveVersionMap to track its RAM used, and
trigger refresh if it's > 25% of IW's RAM buffer.  (We could add
another setting for this but we have so many settings already?).

I also fixed deletes to prune every index.gc_deletes/4 msec, and I
only save a delete tombstone if index.gc_deletes > 0.

I think we could expose the RAM used by versionMap somewhere
(Marvel?  _cat?), but we can do that separately ... I put a TODO.

Closes #6378
I think we do need to do this in order to make sure a delete "burst" is cleaned up. o.w. it may stay for here for ever (or until another delete comes in). It also keeps the system more or less inline with the Gc delete interval as refresh happens every 1s.