Load management send slow down when close to limit

Send slow-down messages when we are at 80% of capacity for a given peer. Also not tested, and includes some refactoring. REVIEW REQUESTED! In theory this should mean the network should behave significantly better, because we can control load without actually having to reject requests and hence misroute and backoff. Thanks Ian.

FOR REVIEW.
I'm getting confused about the 80% en 75% comments. Are they the same? Maybe remove the actual value from the javadoc to avoid confusion when changing the early slowdown value.