Initial version for code review

Because the initial development was occurring on master, there isn't an easy way to do code review. This pull exists solely as a means to code review the entire project. Any changes will be put straight into master and this pull will be closed and the `initial-code-review` branch deleted. All future development will use pull requests into master to facilitate code review.
I agree that it's weird but I'd rather not override this test just for `Memcache` because any changes to it will have to be made in two places.