Viciously deal with more strictures fallout

The 'what can possibly go wrong' blew up with RT#99083, there is definitely
more where this came from. Try to maintain safety by going to even greater
lengths ensuring we do not load any of it ourselves
The revert 8494142c incorrectly killed 4d93345c, reinstating

The loading of IO::Handle is still needed as demonstrated by failing
SQLA optional tests. Bleh!
Initial AUTHORS stub (the last one where `git blame -C -C AUTHORS` worked)

Due to how git currently works one will need to `git log -S"line"` in the
future in order to find when a contributor entry was really made. Preserving
this particular arrangement historically, before more reordering and additions
come in the next commit.
Re-attribute a substantial chunk of docs, due to lost original author

The mysterious <g> is seen on the channel between Aug 24 and Sep 3 of 2008
talking to castaway and various other hackers, supplying a number of doc
patches and then vanishes. Due to the need of correct authorship imposed
by the next commit, reattribute the docs to castaway instead

This is the only such instance - all other authors have been accounted for.
Deemed acceptable as the name is entirely and utterly lost in the ether :(
Deal with authorship properly, in a future-sustainable fashion

This module is arguably one of the most successful collaborative projects on
CPAN. Make it known to the world by introducing a clear canonical source of
authorship metadata.

I have been holding off jumping on the "contributors from git" bandwagon
because of multiple issues

- Not every contribution results in a direct, attributtable commit
- We already had an extensive contributor list, much larger than the shortlog
- Loss of ircnicks (a fine tradition started in 266bdcc3)

So this commit does the proverbial bullet-biting and introduces *proper*
handling of all the ins and outs, including author-mode (CI as well) tests
for proper attribution. As a side-effect we break a lot of the footer links,
to be fixed in next commit.

Btw as I write this `195 contributors made this library what it is today`...
Mind. Blown.
Clarify licensing, ensure footers are consistent throughout the project

Note - this *DOES NOT CHANGE* the licensing of the project in any way, it
is still dual-licensed like perl5, just as it was before this commit. All
additions are for clarifying purposes only.

The way licensing is presented is an amalgamation of information and
prior art found at the following sources:
 - http://www.perlfoundation.org/cpan_licensing_guidelines
 - https://metacpan.org/source/ETHER/Moose-2.1212/LICENSE
 - `git log --color -w -p v5.20.0 ^perl-5.000^ -- Artistic`