ISPN-4873 Statetransfer thread pool deadlock

https://issues.jboss.org/browse/ISPN-4873
https://issues.jboss.org/browse/ISPN-4941

The fix in https://github.com/infinispan/infinispan/pull/3044 was incomplete, because the topology id extracted from `StateRequestCommand`s was always `-1`.

* Update LargeClusterStressTest to create a large number of caches
* Make StateRequestCommand implement TopologyAffectedCommand
Can be removed