HORNETQ-1429 Fixing proton session.close and connection.close leaking connections

This is a small fix after the main refactoring.
Session.close() was leaving sessions around what was making the connection.close() to
ignore close calls and leak connections
config update

Change remote-connectors to excluded inside colocated ha policy configuration
config update

Change scale-down boolean on scale-down to be called 'enabled'
user manual update