Avoid 128K kmem allocations in mzap_upgrade()

As originally implemented the mzap_upgrade() function will
perform up to SPA_MAXBLOCKSIZE allocations using kmem_alloc().
These large allocations can potentially block indefinitely
if contiguous memory is not available.  Since this allocation
is done under the zap->zap_rwlock it can appear as if there is
a deadlock in zap_lockdir().  This is shown below.

The optimal fix for this would be to rework mzap_upgrade()
such that no large allocations are required.  This could be
done but it would result in us diverging further from the other
implementations.  Therefore I've opted against doing this
unless it becomes absolutely necessary.

Instead mzap_upgrade() has been updated to use zio_buf_alloc()
which can reliably provide buffers of up to SPA_MAXBLOCKSIZE.

Signed-off-by: Brian Behlendorf <behlendorf1@llnl.gov>
Signed-off-by: Richard Yao <ryao@gentoo.org>
Close #2580
Add zfs_iput_async() interface

Handle all iputs in zfs_purgedir() and zfs_inode_destroy()
asynchronously to prevent deadlocks.  When the iputs are allowed
to run synchronously in the destroy call path deadlocks between
xattr directory inodes and their parent file inodes are possible.

Signed-off-by: Brian Behlendorf <behlendorf1@llnl.gov>
Signed-off-by: Richard Yao <ryao@gentoo.org>
Closes #457
Revert "Revert "Revert "Fix unlink/xattr deadlock"""

This reverts commit 7973e46 which brings the basic flow of the
code back in line with the other ZFS implementations.  This
was possible due to the following related changes.

e89260a Directory xattr znodes hold a reference on their parent
6f9548c Fix deadlock in zfs_zget()
0a50679 Add zfs_iput_async() interface
4dd1893 Avoid 128K kmem allocations in mzap_upgrade()

Signed-off-by: Brian Behlendorf <behlendorf1@llnl.gov>
Signed-off-by: Richard Yao <ryao@gentoo.org>
Closes #457
Closes #2058
Closes #2128
Closes #2240