Velocity penalty orthogonality

Not sure this is worth merging; putting it up for @nicholasmalaya to look at.

Nick, apparently the answer to the paradox of "if we can't impose any penalty force parallel to the velocity, then what happens if the penalty normal is parallel to the velocity" is "the nonlinear solver screams and dies".  The Jacobians here are satisfying numeric tests, I switched from ILU to MUMPS LU to get the linear solves to all converge, but the nonlinear solver dies after a few (barely residual reducing) steps anyway.  I'll let Bob know and we'll see if this is worth futzing with further.