Made a thing

Patrick: Wee-woo. Wee-woo. Wee-woo. Wee-woo. [Patrick picks up the sign
that the officers showed him earlier. Then sees a darkish figure down
the road. Its SpongeBob but Patrick doesnt realize it] Wee-woo! Wee-woo!
Wee-woo! SpongeBob! I see him!
SpongeBob: [over walkie-talkie] Where is he, Patrick?
Patrick: [over walkie-talkie] At the intersection of Conch and Coral.
[SpongeBob turns his head around to read the street sign]
SpongeBob: Thats where I am. He's right on top of me, but I can't see
him! What's he doing?
Patrick: Uhh, he's just standing there...menacingly! [screams over
walkie-talkie] Get out of there, SpongeBob! [SpongeBob screams] That's
his maniac shriek. He's going to attack! [SpongeBob cries while running
around in circles] He's acting all crazy! Run! Hide behind that
building! [SpongeBob hides behind the building] No, he's behind that
building! Oh, quick, hide behind that street sign! [SpongeBob hides
behind the street sign] No wait! The maniac just went behind that sign!
Quick! Get under the street light! [SpongeBob gets under the street
lights] No wait, he's there, too! Run for your life! [SpongeBob jumps
inside a mailbox. As he tries to relax, the radio is cutting out]
SpongeBob: [over walkie-talkie] Say again, deputy?
Patrick: The maniac's in the mailbox! [SpongeBob pokes his arms and legs
through the mailbox and runs through buildings and a fence]
Changed a thing

How do you confuse a blond?

Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
edited the thing

Anna: You're a good sheep farmer!
Albert: Oh my god, please! I suck at sheep. Louise was right, I can't
keep track of them. There was a sheep in the whorehouse the last week.
Anna: Really?
Albert: Yeah. Wandered in there, and then when I went to pick it up,
somehow it had made 20 dollars.