Discovery: Improve the lifecycle management of the join control thread in zen discovery.

Also added:
* Better exception handling in UnicastZenPing#ping and MulticastZenPing#ping
* In the join thread that runs the innerJoinCluster loop, remember the last known exception and throw that when assertions are enabled. We loop until inner join has completed and if continues exceptions are thrown we should fail the test, because the exception shouldn't occur in production (at least not too often).
Applied feedback 3

Closes #8327