Allow to disable precise children check to support large trees

| Q             | A
| ------------- | ---
| Bug fix?      | no
| New feature?  | yes
| BC breaks?    | yes
| Deprecations? | no
| Tests pass?   | yes
| Fixed tickets | #232
| License       | MIT
| Doc PR        | TODO

I took this a bit further and cleaned up the various options we have to tweak the tree behaviour.

/cc @psytraxx