consent

First stab:

remove consent message type, send instance handshake instead and include consent state (I'm not fully convinced this is nicer than what we had, I'd be happy to revert this)
remove reconnection code.
only store and restore user action bits in storage.
minor code cleanups.
user _needs_ to have instanceid -> clientId mapping, in addition we can store this field in remote instance, but that wouldn't help that much