HPCC-12409 Pathological distribute slowdown fix

Prevent sender queing partial buckets if writers already actively
working on buckets to same target.
Also allow multiple write handler threads to work on the same
target, this allows the serialization/compression (and potentially
dedupping) to occur in parallel even if to same writer.

Signed-off-by: Jake Smith <jake.smith@lexisnexis.com>
You have at least 4 items which have owner.numnodes entries.  It might make sense to have a class for a single node, and have an array of those.