created a new model, this time a Relationship model so that it doesn't actualy create a table but rather stores relations between otehr tables.  Added indexes to this model b/c it will be accesseed a lot.  ran rake db:migrate and rake db:test:prepare
updated the user model with a has_many relationship to the relationships table, passed it a foreign_key parameter 'follower_id' so that it knows to associate the user with the followers through that key, and makes it dependent.  Created the spec tests for this
made a belongs_to call to the relationship table to make it belong to both follower and followed and told it that the classes of both those objects were User
added validations to the relationship model so taht it checks for follower and followed id's presence
adding another has_many relationship to the user model to say it has many followed_users and this is through its relationships table, and teh source is the followed column
added tests for following? and follow! method added to teh user model.  added a test to check that these commands set the user to follow the other user
adding in the following? and followBANG methods to the user model.  the following? method is implemented by making a call on the relationships.find_by_followed_id(other_user.id).  the followBANG command is implemented by called the relationships.createBANG(followed_id: other_user.id) method.
adding in an unfollow method.  it unfollows by calling the relationships.find_by_followed_id(other_user.id).destroy method, which is created by rails.  added in a test for it to the following test suite
added in the :reverse_relationships and :followers tests to see that a user has those attributes, adn added a test to check for reverse relationships>.
ok, got it all set up and working.  I am lost in the woods here.  But that's ok.  Neat way to associate the following and followers relationship through the relationship table, just using reverse lookings, i.e. passing in the other paramater backwards to get it to work.
a little lost here