fixes to prevent flood kicks

I noticed an issue when joining a lot of channels the IRC server will
kick the bot for excess flood (my personal version of this bot is in 41
channels).  Tweaked a couple things around to fix this (though that
means the bot is a bit unresponsive at start...)
fixed issue with tells

the nick wasn't being properly sent, causing the program to never remove
the "tell waiting" check.  Also changed the showtells command to send
tells via query instead of a notice