speaker;replica;ep_id {system};[The episode opens with a bubble transition, and we see a coral reef under the sea. The camera zooms to initiate parallax scrolling, which reveals the city of Bikini Bottom. It continues zooming to show a brown rock, a Moai head, and a pineapple, which each contain inhabitants.];s1e1_1 French Narrator;Ah, the sea... so fascinating. So wonderful. Here, we see Bikini Bottom, teeming with life. [shows from left to right Patrick's, Squidward's, and SpongeBob's houses. Zooms in on SpongeBob's house.] Home to one of my favorite creatures, SpongeBob SquarePants. Yes, of course he lives in a pineapple, you silly.;s1e1_2 {system};[Scene cuts to the house's bedroom. A sea snail, named Gary, is seen sleeping near a pile of newspapers on the floor, a scallop is seen in a birdcage, and a young, optimistic yellow sea sponge, named SpongeBob, is seen sleeping in his bed, snoring as his foghorn alarm clock ticks. SpongeBob's alarm then sounds. He wakes, but is unaffected by the annoying sound, and with a smile on his face, turns it off. He climbs from his bed to a ladder, leading to his diving board.];s1e1_3 SpongeBob; [jumps on the diving board] Look at me, I'm... [jumps up, and leaves his underwear behind] ..naked! [lands inside his pants, then runs toward the exercise room. His head pops out of the top of his pants.] Gotta be in top physical condition for today, Gary.;s1e1_4 Gary;Meow.;s1e1_5 SpongeBob;"[taking deep breaths, he prepares to lift a barbell that is balanced by two lightweight stuffed animals. He sticks out his chest, but almost passes out because he can barely lift it. He drops it, and it makes a ""squeak"" noise] I'm ready! [runs outside] I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready! [as he speaks, a dimwitted sea star's rock tilts upwards with a chubby pink starfish named Patrick stuck to its underside.]";s1e1_6 Patrick;Go, SpongeBob! [falls] Whoa! ;s1e1_7 {system};[crash sound effect];s1e1_8 SpongeBob;[runs down the street to the Krusty Krab] I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! [jumps in the air as the scene freezes and a title reads SpongeBob SquarePants];s1e1_9 French Narrator; SpongeBob SquarePants! ;s1e1_10 {system};[It shows SpongeBob running through various landscapes, as it shows a frozen scene of SpongeBob standing in front of the Krusty Krab the scene unfreezes and then the episode continues as normal];s1e1_11 {system};[bubble transitions to the Krusty Krab];s1e1_12 SpongeBob;There it is. The finest eating establishment ever established for eating: The Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty... with a Help Wanted sign in the window. For years I've been dreaming of this moment. I'm gonna go in there, march straight to the manager, look 'em straight in the eye [breaks the fourth wall and looks the audience in the eye], lay it on the line and... I can't do this! [starts to run home, but Patrick stops him.] Hey, Patrick-;s1e1_13 Patrick;Where do you think you're going?;s1e1_14 SpongeBob;I was just...;s1e1_15 Patrick;No, you're not. You're going to the Krusty Krab and get! That! Job!;s1e1_16 SpongeBob;I can't, don't you see? I'm not good enough.;s1e1_17 Patrick;"Whose first words were ""May I take your order?""?";s1e1_18 SpongeBob;Mine were.;s1e1_19 Patrick;Who made a spatula out of toothpicks in wood shop?;s1e1_20 SpongeBob;I did.;s1e1_21 Patrick;[grimaces and contorts twice while trying to come up with a good third line] Who's a, uh, who's uh, oh! And who's a big yellow cube with holes?;s1e1_22 SpongeBob;I am!;s1e1_23 Patrick;Who's ready?;s1e1_24 SpongeBob;I'm ready!;s1e1_25 Patrick;Who's ready?!;s1e1_26 SpongeBob;I'm ready! [runs toward the Krusty Krab.] I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready!;s1e1_27 {system};[A turquoise octopus is seen cleaning graffiti on the restaurant's windows. That octopus, named Squidward, is spraying stain remover and attempting to wipe off the graffiti.];s1e1_28 Squidward;" [cleaning graffiti of himself with the word ""loser,"" sees SpongeBob, and sighs] Oh no, SpongeBob. What could he possibly want? ";s1e1_29 SpongeBob; [in background, at first while Squidward was talking] I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! Go, SpongeBob! Go, SpongeBob! Go, SpongeBob! Go, self! ;s1e1_30 {system}; [Squidward looks at the Help Wanted sign, screams, and runs inside to warn Mr. Krabs] ;s1e1_31 Squidward;" [While SpongeBob says, ""I'm ready,"" one more time in the background] Mr. Krabs! [cuts to the ordering window, where a greedy crab is seen happily sniffing a handful of money. Squidward runs up to him.] Hurry, Mr. Krabs, before it's too late, I gotta tell you- [interrupted by SpongeBob] ";s1e1_32 SpongeBob; Permission to come aboard, captain! [deep voice] I've been training my whole life for the day I could join the Krusty Krew [normal voice] and now I'm ready! ;s1e1_33 {system}; [SpongeBob trips on a nail stuck in the floorboard. He bounces back and forth on the ground, and shouts and blurts incomprehensibly upon each hit. The restaurant manager, a red crab named Mr. Krabs, and Squidward look at each other. His fall causes him to bounce against the ceiling. SpongeBob yet again shouts and blurts incomprehensibly while his bounces and ricochets around the building accelerate. He then rolls to a stop at the feet of Squidward and Mr. Krabs.] ;s1e1_34 SpongeBob; So, uh, when do I start? ;s1e1_35 MrKrabs; Well, lad, it looks like you don't even have your sea legs. ;s1e1_36 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs, please! I'll prove I'm fry cook material! Ask Squidward, he'll vouch for me. ;s1e1_37 {system}; [Mr. Krabs and Squidward quickly walk away from SpongeBob. Squidward looks at Mr. Krabs.] ;s1e1_38 Squidward; [deep breath] No. ;s1e1_39 {system}; [Mr. Krabs winks. Squidward and Mr. Krabs head back to SpongeBob, who looks completely puzzled at what he's hearing] ;s1e1_40 Mr. Krabs ; Well, lad, we'll give you a test, and if you pass, you'll be on the Krusty Krew. Go out and fetch me... a... [SpongeBob takes out a notepad] uh, hydrodynamic spatula... [SpongeBob quickly jots down what he says] with, um, port-and-starboard-attachments, [more scribbling] and, uh... turbo drive. [more scribbling] And don't come back ?til you get one. [puts a Krusty Krab crew hat on SpongeBob's head.] ;s1e1_41 {system}; [SpongeBob sees how he looks in a mirror, there are sparkles on his hat, and he has a huge, satisfied smile] ;s1e1_42 SpongeBob; [saluting Krabs] Aye aye, captain! [reading] One hydrodynamic spatula, with port-and-starboard attachments, turbo drive, coming right up, sir! [salutes again] ;s1e1_43 Mr. Krabs ; Carry on! [SpongeBob leaves] We'll never see that lubber again. ;s1e1_44 Squidward; [smiling] You're terrible. A hydro-what? ;s1e1_45 {system}; [Squidward and Mr. Krabs laugh. While Squidward laughs, his nose moves distinctly while he inhales and exhales. Mr. Krabs' laugh sounds like a pirate. As they laugh, SpongeBob is shown leaving the Krusty Krab. As SpongeBob fades out of sight, five buses drive toward the Krusty Krab from the opposite direction.] ;s1e1_46 Bus driver ; Hey! Hey! Please! Passengers are to stay seated and not put their fins out the window! ;s1e1_47 {system}; [The five buses surround the Krusty Krab and the bus doors open. Mr. Krabs stops laughing. Squidward also stops laughing but embarrassingly smiles at Mr. Krabs' attentive gesture.] ;s1e1_48 Mr. Krabs ; [gasps] That sounded like hatch doors! [sniffs repeatedly] Do you smell it? That smell... A kind of smelly smell... A smelly smell that smells... smelly... [his eyes widen] Anchovies. ;s1e1_49 Squidward;What?;s1e1_50 Mr. Krabs ;Anchovies!;s1e1_51 {system};" [The anchovies get out of the buses and rush inside the Krusty Krab, crowding, repeating the word ""eat"" over and over again] ";s1e1_52 Squidward; Please, please, quiet! [the anchovies stop talking] Is this any way to behave, hmm? ;s1e1_53 Anchovy;Eat.;s1e1_54 Squidward; Could we show a little decency and form a neat, single file line in front of the register? ;s1e1_55 {system};" [The anchovies stare for a moment, then pick up the boat, as their cries of ""eat!"" become more intense. Cut to Barg'N-Mart as SpongeBob enters.] ";s1e1_56 SpongeBob; [singing to himself] Barg'N-Mart, meeting all of your spatula needs. ;s1e1_57 {system}; [Cuts back to the Krusty Krab. Squidward and Mr. Krabs are still in the boat register, and being tossed around like a ship in a storm.] ;s1e1_58 Mr. Krabs ; All hands on deck! Get your anchors out of your pants! ;s1e1_59 Squidward; One single file line is all I ask! ;s1e1_60 Mr. Krabs ; Whoa! [he and Squidward are thrown up in the air] Batten down the hatches, Mr. Squidward! [they get thrown back up again with Krabs clutching Squidward] I want my mommy, Mr. Squidward! [cuts to Barg'N-Mart] ;s1e1_61 SpongeBob; [singing] Do do do do do do, spatula, spatula, port-and-starboard attachments. ;s1e1_62 {system}; [Cuts back to the Krusty Krab. Squidward and Mr. Krabs are sent towards a pole by a wave of anchovies.] ;s1e1_63 Squidward;Help!;s1e1_64 Mr. Krabs ; Man overboard! Climb, Mr. Squidward! Climb! [They climb the mast, while the anchovies try to get them down. The anchovies then form a big wave twice.] ;s1e1_65 {system}; Eat! Eat! ;s1e1_66 Mr. Krabs ; This is the end! [shaking hands with Squidward] Goodbye, Mr. Squidward! ;s1e1_67 Squidward; Oh, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e1_68 {system}; [Mr. Krabs and Squidward cry, then SpongeBob comes in with red lights flashing and flying with the spatula, singing a heroic tune] ;s1e1_69 SpongeBob; Permission to come aboard captain! Da da da da da da da! Da da da da da da da da da da! Did someone order a spatula? ;s1e1_70 Mr. Krabs ; [stuttering in shock at SpongeBob getting the hydrodynamic spatula] ;s1e1_71 SpongeBob; That's right! One hydrodynamic spatula with [two spatulas pop out on the sides of the previous one] port-and-starboard attachments! And let's not forget the turbo drive! [the two extending spatulas twirl around and smack Squidward and Mr. Krabs in the face] Would you believe they only had one in stock? To the kitchen! [to the anchovies] Who's hungry?! ;s1e1_72 {system};" [Tiny Tim's ""Living in the Sunlight, Loving in the Moonlight"" plays while SpongeBob flies through the kitchen window. A montage of SpongeBob making and serving Krabby Patties plays. SpongeBob crashes into a box of patties and shoots them with his eyes toward the grill.] ";s1e1_73 {system};" [SpongeBob becomes a number ""1"" followed by ascending numbers up to ""4."" He squeezes a bottle of ketchup and mustard on Krabby Patty to form a smiley face. He adds a patty and the rest of the toppings on top of the lower bun to form a Krabby Patty. SpongeBob serves the Krabby Patty. Some of the anchovies noticed, and one of them caught a Krabby Patty. All of the anchovies look toward the window to anticipate more Krabby Patties. SpongeBob then serves up Krabby Patty after Krabby Patty. He repeats chopping vegetables and serving yet more Krabby Patties. Numerous Krabby Patties are launched through the order window to the hungry anchovies.] ";s1e1_74 Mr. Krabs ; That was the finest fast-foodsmanship I've ever seen, Mr. SquarePants. Welcome aboard. [gives SpongeBob a name tag] ;s1e1_75 Squidward; B-but, but, Mr. Krabs... ;s1e1_76 Mr. Krabs ; Three cheers for SpongeBob! Hip-hip! ;s1e1_77 Squidward; [weakly] Hooray, Mr.? ;s1e1_78 Mr. Krabs ;Hip-hip!;s1e1_79 Squidward; [quickly] Hooray. ;s1e1_80 Mr. Krabs ;Hip-hip!;s1e1_81 Squidward; [quickly] Hooray. Mr. Krabs? ;s1e1_82 Mr. Krabs ; I'll be in my quarters, counting up the booty. [wheels a wheelbarrow piled with an enormous stack of cash to his office. As he walks towards his office, Patrick enters] ;s1e1_83 Patrick; Good morning, Krusty Krew! ;s1e1_84 Squidward; What would you like to order, Patrick? ;s1e1_85 Patrick; One Krabby Patty, please. ;s1e1_86 {system};" [The instrumental to ""Living in the Sunlight, Loving in the Moonlight"" starts playing. SpongeBob flies back to the kitchen, using his spatula] ";s1e1_87 Squidward;What?;s1e1_88 {system}; [A score of Krabby Patties is immediately fired through the servery, which Squidward dodges, colliding into Patrick and sending him flying out of the Krusty Krab. Cuts to Krusty Krab exterior [crashing noise.];s1e1_89 Patrick;[screams];s1e1_90 Squidward; Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs, come see your new employee! ;s1e1_91 {system};" [The final instrumental of Tiny Tim's ""Livin' in the Sunlight"" plays (xylophone solo, followed by a timpani beat and a final note), and the further sounds of shooting Krabby Patties and smashed glass play at the same time, ending the episode] ";s1e1_92 {system}; [The episode opens up with SpongeBob's, Patrick's, and Squidward's houses.] ;s1e2_1 {system}; [The scene pans to show that everything on his lawn is clean, except for a seashell on the left side of it.] ;s1e2_2 {system}; [The camera shows Squidward angry. He walks over to the seashell, looks around, and kicks it onto SpongeBob's lawn while whistling casually.] ;s1e2_3 {system}; [The scene then changes to show SpongeBob's house. As soon as the window opens, SpongeBob's face is shown. He exits through his window and sits on its rim. He notices the seashell on his lawn, he gets an idea and starts sliding to the back of his house to his garage to get a reef blower. The giant backpack-like container, with a blower hose, which looks like a jet engine, a power switch, and a pull starter.] ;s1e2_4 {system}; [The scene changes to show Squidward resting on his hammock.] ;s1e2_5 {system}; [Squidward hears the reef blower's motor throbbing. He sees SpongeBob exiting out of his garage with the reef blower. Squidward grumbles and puts in his earplugs so that he can continue to rest.] ;s1e2_6 {system}; [SpongeBob gets to the seashell and tries to blow it away from his lawn by using the reef blower. He does this twice. He then blows extra hard, and a huge amount of sand is thrown in the air.] ;s1e2_7 {system}; [The scene changes to show Squidward eating some vegetables and then, the huge amount of sand falls from the sky and buries him. SpongeBob runs towards Squidward and blows the sand away.] ;s1e2_8 {system}; [Squidward looks at a leaf on his plate with grains of sand on it.] ;s1e2_9 {system}; [SpongeBob cleans the leaf in front of Squidward's head, tearing apart half of the leaf and causing grains of sand to get into Squidward's eyes. SpongeBob cleans Squidward's eyes with another blow.] ;s1e2_10 {system}; [The scene changes to show a large pile of sand on SpongeBob's lawn.] ;s1e2_11 {system};" [SpongeBob points his finger to it and mouths a word and the caption reads ""You!"" He walks to the pile of sand, sets the reef blower to reverse, and uses it to suck up the sand from his lawn.] ";s1e2_12 {system}; [The scene changes to show SpongeBob's lawn clean, but then the reef blower starts breaking apart, throwing out sand and parts of the machinery.] ;s1e2_13 {system}; [SpongeBob takes off the reef blower. He unzips the pack. He goes over to pick up the thrown-out contents. The reef blower coughs while he is absent. He returns with large hands carrying the thrown-out contents. He zips it back up and pulls the pull starter in an attempt to try to start it. The motor starts and then dies.] ;s1e2_14 {system}; [The camera shows him becoming angry or just determined. The scene changes and he pulls the handle very far.] ;s1e2_15 {system}; [SpongeBob lets go of the handle, which stays still. SpongeBob wipes his hands together. He grabs the handle again. The handle pulls him away, leaving a bubble silhouette of SpongeBob that quickly dissolves. SpongeBob passes an intersection where two fish in two different cars going opposite directions stop. He passes some houses and finally returns to the reef blower, where he gets strapped in.] ;s1e2_16 {system}; [The reef blower starts, sucking up all the water in the sea, causing Squidward, who is sitting on his front doorstep, to gasp due to the inability to breathe air. His eyes also change into X's.] ;s1e2_17 {system}; [The scene changes to show the reef blower massive, and then it explodes, causing water to cover the screen. When the water stops, the screen shows big piles of sand everywhere, but SpongeBob's lawn is relatively clean.] ;s1e2_18 {system}; [SpongeBob exits one of the piles, wipes his hands together, and happily enters his house.] ;s1e2_19 {system}; [Episode ends with Squidward at his doorstep, with a pile of sand covering him except for his head. The seashell falls on Squidward's nose. Squidward narrows his eyelids.] ;s1e2_20 SpongeBob; [stands in Jellyfish Fields. A blue jellyfish floats by SpongeBob. SpongeBob creeps from behind a bush and stares at the jellyfish through a telescope. Cuts to his view with the telescope] Wow, four stingers. [puts away the telescope and puts on his glasses. Cuts to the jellyfish, where SpongeBob floats over it with his net. Cuts to the jellyfish alone, where SpongeBob's foot stretches out from off-screen and then the rest of his body appears. He attempts to grab the jellyfish in his net, but he catches himself in the net, then the jellyfish flies away. In the background, a young girl's voice is heard struggling. SpongeBob looks down a cliff and sees a land creature trying to fight a giant clam that's attempting to eat her. SpongeBob gasps.] Where have I seen this before? [takes out his Field Guide book and skims through the pages] Here it is. [cut to picture of a squirrel] Land squirrel. [closes the book] That little squirrel is in trouble. [cuts to the squirrel, named Sandy, who is pushing the clam into the ground] ;s1e3_1 Sandy; Take that, you sorry old clam! Y'all need to learn some manners! [walks away] You're about as ugly as homemade soup. ;s1e3_2 SpongeBob; Hooray, land squirrel! [cuts back to the land squirrel, who is oblivious to the clam resurfacing and jumping right at her. Cuts to SpongeBob, who is shocked, his glasses shoot up] Look out! [scene cuts to the clam with Sandy trying to escape the clam] Hold on, little squirrel! [does a karate yell in front of the clam, then does the same while bouncing to different sides. He jumps high in the air, and lands on top of the clam;s1e3_3 {system}; [SpongeBob pulls up his pants and starts to charge at the clam. He jumps into the clam's mouth and starts to strangle its tongue. SpongeBob sees that Sandy has already escaped and the clam swallows him now.] ;s1e3_4 Sandy; Hold on there, little square dude! [gets SpongeBob out and kicks the clam around some more and finally kicks it across the sea. The clam whimpers. Sandy leans down to see if SpongeBob is okay.] ;s1e3_5 SpongeBob; Hey, you like karate too. [does some karate poses, then he stops and falls flat on his head] So, what's your name? ;s1e3_6 Sandy; Sandy. [makes athletic moves] So what do y'all call yourself? ;s1e3_7 SpongeBob; [runs up a big rock] I'm SpongeBob! [jumps down, SpongeBob soon lands on one of his corners] ;s1e3_8 Sandy; Well, SpongeBob, take a gander at this. [walks next to a huge rock closes her eyes and slaps it with her hand, making a gong sound effect, SpongeBob is confused as nothing seems to have happen, but then cracking sounds are heard and rock shakes and breaks into pieces] ;s1e3_9 SpongeBob; Oh. [Sandy grins and blinks] Oh, yeah? Watch this! [prepares to do a karate move, but all he does is make an armpit fart noise. Sandy walks on-screen giggling] ;s1e3_10 Sandy; I like you, SpongeBob. Why, we could be tighter than bark on a tree. Hi-yah! [karate chops SpongeBob?s head.] ;s1e3_11 SpongeBob; Uh, I like you too, Sandy. Hi-yah! [karate chops her helmet, but realizes it hurts.] Ow. Say, what is that thing on your head? ;s1e3_12 Sandy; Why, that's my air helmet. ;s1e3_13 SpongeBob; May I try it on? ;s1e3_14 Sandy; Heck no. I need it to breathe. I gotta have my air. ;s1e3_15 SpongeBob; Me too. I love air. Air is good. ;s1e3_16 Sandy; No kidding? ;s1e3_17 SpongeBob;" Why, ""air"" is my middle name. The more air, the better. Can't get enough of that air. ";s1e3_18 Sandy; Shee-oot. How about comin' over tomorrow for tea and cookies then? [shows a map leading to Sandy's house] Don't be late. ;s1e3_19 SpongeBob; Okay, see you tomorrow. [runs to Patrick's house. Patrick is sun tanning on his rock] Patrick! Patrick! Patrick, Patrick, Patrick! What's air? ;s1e3_20 Patrick;Huh?;s1e3_21 SpongeBob; I just met this girl. She wears a hat full of... air. ;s1e3_22 Patrick;" Do you mean she puts on ""airs""? ";s1e3_23 SpongeBob; I guess so. ;s1e3_24 Patrick; That's just fancy talk. If you wanna be fancy, hold your pinky up like this. The higher you hold it, the fancier you are. ;s1e3_25 SpongeBob; [holds his pinky up] How's that? ;s1e3_26 Patrick;Higher.;s1e3_27 SpongeBob; Like that? ;s1e3_28 Patrick; Now that's fancy. They should call you SpongeBob FancyPants. [cuts to Sandy's treedome] Remember: When in doubt, pinky out. You can do it, SpongeBob. I'll be watching. [opens the door as SpongeBob walks in with his pinky raised high and flowers in his right hand.] ;s1e3_29 SpongeBob; Thanks, pal. [rings the doorbell with a bouquet in his hand] ;s1e3_30 Sandy;Hello?;s1e3_31 SpongeBob; Hi-ya, Sandy. It?s me, SpongeBob. ;s1e3_32 Sandy; Hold on a sec, I'll let you in. ;s1e3_33 SpongeBob; [whistles then all the water goes down the drain, then bangs on the door] Sandy! Sandy! Open up! Sandy! Sandy! [Sandy opens the door and SpongeBob jiggles on the ground] Sandy, something's gone terribly wrong. There's no water in... [looks around] ...here. ;s1e3_34 Sandy; ?Course there's no water. Nuttin' but air. ;s1e3_35 SpongeBob; [waves his hand around and smells the air] No water? ;s1e3_36 Sandy; That ain't a problem, is it? Hi-yah! ;s1e3_37 SpongeBob; Problem? [laughing] Hi-yah! That's how I like my air! [takes a deep breath as Sandy walks off. As soon as she leaves, he lets it all out, and gets black circles around his eyes] With no water. ;s1e3_38 Sandy; [cartwheeling] Well, alright. I made Texas tea and cookies. Well, come on in! Hi-yah! [SpongeBob is walking an inch forward and it makes weak squeaking sounds with every step] That's not in. In. [SpongeBob walks another inch and there is more squeaking. Sandy runs, gets SpongeBob, takes his hand, and runs off] You're a funny little dude. Come on, I'll give you the grand tour. [fades to the blazing sun and pan down where Sandy and SpongeBob are standing] So this is my own private little air bubble. This air is the driest... [SpongeBob gasps] ...purest... [SpongeBob gasps again] ...most airiest air in the whole sea. Oh, over there's my birdbath. [Cuts to the birdbath, where an orange bird is splashing and chirping] And that's my oak tree. [SpongeBob seems enticed by the water in the birdbath. He tries to sneak away, but stays until Sandy lets her guard down] It provides me with extra air. This dome is made of the finest polyurethane, that's a fancy word for plastic. Ain't that just the bee's knees? [SpongeBob nods] Tell you what, weren't easy getting here neither. First, I... [SpongeBob finally escapes and wallows in the birdbath, absorbing all the water. He then jumps back to his original spot, and the bird is quite angry. SpongeBob gets back before Sandy notices] ...that's my treadmill. That's how I stay in tip-top shape. Well, come on. Let?s have that tea now. [does in-air karate moves and moves off-screen. SpongeBob gasps. He hears some knocking from outside. It's Patrick, pointing at his pinky] ;s1e3_39 Patrick; Pinky. Pinky. ;s1e3_40 SpongeBob; [blinks, weakly holds up his pinky, and gasps again. Fade to him sitting at a picnic bench. He now has little wrinkles around his eyes and his mouth is all puckered up. He holds up his bouquet] I brought you some flowers. ;s1e3_41 Sandy; [walks over] For me? How sweet. [grabs the flowers, but SpongeBob refuses to let go. She finally pries them loose and part of SpongeBob's pinky falls off. He closes his hand] You okay? ;s1e3_42 SpongeBob; [the black circles around his eyes are gone. His voice is now hoarse] Yes, I'm okay. ;s1e3_43 Sandy; You know, you're the first sea critter to ever visit. ;s1e3_44 SpongeBob; I can?t imagine why. ;s1e3_45 Sandy; Can I get you anything? ;s1e3_46 SpongeBob; Water would be nice. ;s1e3_47 Sandy; I'm gonna put these in a vase. ;s1e3_48 SpongeBob; Take your time. [Sandy goes in her tree and closes the door off-screen. SpongeBob hears it, he then gasps and stumbles toward the door and struggles to open it] I gotta get out of here! [screams and then thinks] ;s1e3_49 Sandy; [in SpongeBob's head] I like you, SpongeBob. We could be tighter than bark on a tree. ;s1e3_50 {system}; [SpongeBob struggles even more] ;s1e3_51 Patrick; [in SpongeBob's head] When in doubt, pinky out. ;s1e3_52 SpongeBob; [lifts his pinky up and gets confidence and victorious music plays.] I don't need water! Water's for quitters! I don't need it! I don't need it! I don't need it! I don't need it, I don't need it... [sits down, loses confidence again and the music stops] ;s1e3_53 Sandy; Why, these flowers are just beautiful! [sniffs] They'll last much, much longer in a vase full of ice cold water. [puts the vase down. SpongeBob is totally enticed by the water. Sandy sits down across from him] So tell me about yourself. [puts her hands under head feeling fascinated about SpongeBob sharing himself] It must be fascinating bein' a sea critter. [SpongeBob watches a drop of water drop down the side of the glass] SpongeBob? [a timer goes off] Oh, there's the cookies. [walks back into the tree] Be right back. ;s1e3_54 SpongeBob; [thinking] I don't need it, I don't need it, I definitely don't need it. [close-up of SpongeBob's face. He's really shriveled now] I don't need it. [close-up of vase, then another one of SpongeBob's face] I don't need it. [close-up of vase] I don't need it. [close-up of SpongeBob's face] I don't need it. [long pause, finally yelling] I need it! [shoots up into the air, bounces off the ceiling and holds the vase.] ;s1e3_55 Patrick; No, SpongeBob! No, no, no! Stop! Pinky! Pinky! ;s1e3_56 SpongeBob; [holds up his pinky and starts guzzling down the whole vase of water] I'm a quitter! [screams and runs around] ;s1e3_57 Patrick; [enters into the dome and slams the door shut] You can't leave now. You'll blow it. ;s1e3_58 SpongeBob; [muffled while hanging on the door] Air is not good, Patrick. Air is not good. ;s1e3_59 Patrick; [grabs SpongeBob off the door] You're just being shy. [carries SpongeBob to the picnic table] Don't worry, buddy. You're doing fine. [starts getting weak] I won't let you blow... this. [drops SpongeBob and crawls on the floor, panting. He coughs and sputters, then stands up] What kind of place is this?! [runs toward the door and tries to open it] There's no water in here! ;s1e3_60 SpongeBob; [joins in on the door-opening struggle] I tried to tell you! ;s1e3_61 Patrick; We've gotta get out of here! ;s1e3_62 SpongeBob; You're... doing it... wrong! ;s1e3_63 Patrick; Wait, no! We've got to get out! [The two pass out.] ;s1e3_64 {system}; [fades to the sun] ;s1e3_65 Sandy; [walks out of the tree with tea and cookies] Come and get it! Y'all gonna like this... ;s1e3_66 {system}; [She screams and drops her tray. On the grass is a live-action sponge and starfish. Cuts to SpongeBob and Patrick leaning against a ladder with two goldfish helmets on. Sandy, on top of the ladder, uses a hose to fill those helmets with water, so they can finally breathe.] ;s1e3_67 Sandy; There, that oughta do it! If y'all needed water, you shoulda asked. [carries over a tray with three tea glasses. Everyone takes one] I propose a toast, to new friends. [drinks it while SpongeBob and Patrick lift their drinks up and they clink the glasses on the helmets, causing them to spill] Hold on a second. [places a tea bag in each helmet, allowing the two to drink the tea water] I hope you like your tea strong. Drink up! [Patrick nudges SpongeBob and they both put their pinkies up. They sip the tea.] ;s1e3_68 {system}; [The episode starts with a view of the houses of Patrick, Squidward, and SpongeBob. The screen zooms in closer, and fades to a view of SpongeBob's entrance.] ; s1e4_1 SpongeBob; [walks outside his house, and breathes in the fresh air] Ahh, what a wonderful day. The sun is out, the water is shimmering, scallops are chirping. So peaceful. [grabs wood, a hammer, and some nails, and starts to noisily build a stand. Squidward peeks his head out the window.] ; s1e4_2 Squidward; Can we lower the volume, please? I can't work with all that racket going on! ; s1e4_3 SpongeBob; Oh, sure thing, Squidward. ; s1e4_4 Squidward; Yes. Mmm. Right. Mmm. ; s1e4_5 SpongeBob; Okay. [taps on a nail lightly, and he looks up at Squidward's window. He does it again, and continues to, making sure he doesn't make too much noise. Meanwhile, in Squidward's house, Squidward has his clarinet in his hand.] ; s1e4_6 Squidward; And now... for some soothing sounds from Squidward's clarinet. Thank you, thank you. [starts to play while SpongeBob looks up and sees that Squidward is playing, so he decides to finish his stand quickly. Squidward looks out the window again.] ; s1e4_7 Squidward; I thought I... Huh? ; s1e4_8 SpongeBob; Hey, Squidward. Wanna blow some bubbles? Only 25 cents. ; s1e4_9 Squidward; Oh, right. Like I would spend a moment of my time blowing bubbles. ; s1e4_10 SpongeBob; Uh huh. ; s1e4_11 Squidward; Oh, puh-lease. I mean, who in the world would pay to blow bubbles? [Patrick comes out of his house, stuck to the underside of the rock] ; s1e4_12 Patrick; Good morning. [a TV, lamp, and chair are seen below Patrick's rock. Patrick falls off his rock, onto his furniture, and begins screaming] ; s1e4_13 Squidward; Oh, boy. [Patrick walks over to SpongeBob] ; s1e4_14 SpongeBob; Good morning to you, sir. Would you care to blow a bubble? ; s1e4_15 Patrick; Hmm, how much is it? ; s1e4_16 SpongeBob; Only a quarter. ; s1e4_17 Patrick; Sounds reasonable. [whispering] Uh, I'm going to need to borrow a quarter. ; s1e4_18 SpongeBob; Sure thing, Patrick. [pulls out a quarter and he gives it to Patrick] ; s1e4_19 Patrick; Ah, one quarter. [hands the quarter back to SpongeBob, whom bites it to see if it's real] ; s1e4_20 SpongeBob; Thank you. [cuts back to Squidward] ; s1e4_21 Squidward; Hmm, business is booming. [laughs] How did I ever get surrounded by such loser neighbors? Uh-huh. [continues playing. Cut back to SpongeBob and Patrick. SpongeBob dips the wand in the bubble soap] ; s1e4_22 SpongeBob;" One bubble wand, dipped and ready to go. [Patrick grabs the wand from SpongeBob, inhales deeply and begins to blow, but a bubble doesn't come out. He pants and blows again. After a while, SpongeBob puts up a ""Lessons"" sign. Patrick then loses his breath] Could I interest you in some lessons? Only 25 cents. "; s1e4_23 Patrick; Uh, very well, then. Hey, Sponge, can I borrow another quarter? [SpongeBob hands Patrick a quarter] Thanks. [winks and hands the quarter back to SpongeBob] ; s1e4_24 SpongeBob; Okay, Patrick, it's all in the technique. [starts doing his infamous routine] First go like this, spin around. Stop! Double take three times: one, two, three. Then, pelvic thrust! Whoooo! Whooooooo! Stop on your right foot, don't forget it! Now it's time to bring it around town. Bring-it-around-town. Then you do this, then this, and this, and that, and-this-and-that-and-this-and-that, and then... [blows bubbles shaped like ducks] ; s1e4_25 Patrick; Oooh. [SpongeBob pops out of nowhere and blows a box. Patrick giggles and SpongeBob blows a caterpillar] Ah! [The caterpillar then pops one-by-one, with descending sounds. Patrick continues to giggle. SpongeBob blows a tugboat, and it floats off, pops, and makes a foghorn noise. Cuts to inside of Squidward's house] ; s1e4_26 Squidward; Huh? [shakes his clarinet. Cut back to outside with SpongeBob and Patrick] ; s1e4_27 SpongeBob;" And now... with two hands! [inhales deeply and blows out an elephant. Circus music, in particular part of the piece ""Entry of the Gladiators,"" starts playing.] "; s1e4_28 Patrick;" [laughs] It's a giraffe! [Patrick continues laughing as the elephant floats over into Squidward's house. SpongeBob then worried as the bubble pops and tons of smaller bubbles come out of both windows of the house while an elephant sounds. Squidward opens the door with a sour look on his face. SpongeBob and Patrick hide behind the stand. SpongeBob places a ""Closed"" sign on it. Squidward looks over the stand] "; s1e4_29 SpongeBob; Excuse me, sir, but we are clo- ; s1e4_30 Squidward; Don't give me any of that! How can you two possibly make all this noise just blowing bubbles?! ; s1e4_31 SpongeBob; We're not just blowing bubbles. We're making bubble art. Watch carefully. [does his infamous routine again] First go like this, spin around. Stop! Double take three times: one, two, three. Then pelvic thrust! Whoooo! Whooooooo! Stop on your right foot, don't forget it! Now it's time to bring it around town. Bring-it-around-town. Then you do this, then this, and this, and that, and-this-and-that-and-this-and-that, and then... [blows a butterfly, which flies over to Squidward, lands on his head, and pops] ; s1e4_32 Squidward; That's not art. That's just annoying. Blowing bubbles, that's the lamest idea I have ever heard. [SpongeBob and Patrick, now depressed, head to SpongeBob's house] You should be ashamed of yourselves. [SpongeBob closes the door as Squidward laughs to himself] Bubbles. [continues laughing] Art. [mumbles, and picks up the bubble wand, sniffs it, and inhales to blow. Then, SpongeBob pops up out of nowhere] ; s1e4_33 SpongeBob; That'll be 25 cents, sir. ; s1e4_34 Squidward; Ah, whoa, what? [SpongeBob blinks] Oh... who-who would pay 25 cents to blow bubbles? ; s1e4_35 SpongeBob;" We also offer lessons for beginners. [puts the ""Lessons"" sign up] "; s1e4_36 Squidward; Beginners? What could be more simple than blowing a stupid bubble? [pulls a quarter out] Here's your 25 cents! [SpongeBob bites it to see if it's real and it bends] Watch and learn. [inhales and blows, but nothing happens] Uhh... wait, wait, wait. [he inhales and blows again, but nothing happens again] One more time. Here. Wait. [inhales and blows again, and a small bubble comes out and instantly falls to the ground and bursts, making a fart sound. Looks over at SpongeBob and Patrick. They gulp, and then start whistling. Squidward places another quarter on the stand] Uhh... Just a mere warm-up. [dips the wand in the bubble container, inhales deeply and blows hard. The bubble falls to the ground again, making another fart sound, gets another quarter out and puts it on the stand] ; s1e4_37 SpongeBob; Hey, Squidward, remember the technique. [Squidward keeps trying to blow bubbles while SpongeBob and Patrick are trying to show him the technique] Squidward, technique! You do this, and this, step back.... ; s1e4_38 Patrick; Hey! Technique, Squidward! ; s1e4_39 SpongeBob; Spin around like thi? Like this... Look at me, over here, one... two.... yeah, three... ; s1e4_40 Patrick; The pelvic woo! ; s1e4_41 SpongeBob;" Look, we're doing the technique! And don't for... Don't forget the ""Woooooo!"" Squidward? "; s1e4_42 Patrick; Listen to Sponge! ; s1e4_43 SpongeBob; Technique! Technique! Technique! ; s1e4_44 SpongeBob; [weakly] You're not doing the technique. ; s1e4_45 Patrick;Technique.; s1e4_46 Squidward; Technique? Technique!? Technique, technique, technique, technique, technique! [starts to do the infamous routine, while imitating SpongeBob] First I do this, spin around. Stop. Double take three times. And here we go, pelvic thrust. Wehooooo! Wehoohoo! Oh, stop on your right foot, don't forget it. Then, bring it around town. And a little of this, a little of that, a little of this, this, this, this, that, that, that, that. And that, that, that that that that! And then... [screams very loudly into the wand, blowing a gargantuan, unshaped bubble] ; s1e4_47 SpongeBob; All right, Squid. That was so good. ; s1e4_48 Patrick; Squid is number one. ; s1e4_49 Squidward; I really did it, didn't I? Hey, you guys didn't blow anything like that. ; s1e4_50 SpongeBob;No.; s1e4_51 Squidward; Now that's a bubble. ; s1e4_52 SpongeBob; You said it, Squidward. See, it is all in the technique. ; s1e4_53 Patrick; Yeah, technique. ; s1e4_54 Squidward; Technique? Hah. SpongeBob, you don't think I created that [kisses his tentacle] beautiful work of art with your help? [starts laughing] Come on, it's in my genes. ; s1e4_55 Squidward; Thank you, thank you, thank you. [starts to play his clarinet. SpongeBob and Patrick chant Squidward's name. At one point, they belly flop each other and Patrick falls on the ground.] I rock. [continues to play his clarinet. As SpongeBob and Patrick continue to chant, Squidward's bubble flies over them, covers Squidward's house, and pulls it out of the ground and up towards the top of the ocean. SpongeBob notices and stops Patrick] ; s1e4_56 SpongeBob; [concerned] Squidward! [Patrick now notices] ; s1e4_57 Squidward; Hello, my friends. You are looking at a... [sees how high he is from the sky] ; s1e4_58 Squidward; ...genius. [the bubble explodes in the air and then the ground violently rumbles and shakes. SpongeBob and Patrick look in awe] ; s1e4_59 {system}; [Pan across Goo Lagoon] ;s1e5_1 French Narrator; Ah, Goo Lagoon. A stinky mud puddle to you and me. But to the inhabitants of Bikini Bottom, a wonderful, stinky mud puddle. [SpongeBob and Sandy sit enjoying the beach. SpongeBob sighs] ;s1e5_2 SpongeBob; What a great day. [runs off] Hey, Sandy! Look! [now covered in a mound of sand] I'm Sandy! [Sandy laughs. SpongeBob forms sand around his head and nose to look like Squidward and imitates his voice] Hey Sandy, who am I? [Sandy still laughs. SpongeBob picks up a sand phone] Hello, SpongeBob. Could you keep it down? I'm trying to be boring. [Sandy continues laughing] ;s1e5_3 Sandy; SpongeBob! [a doorbell rings, SpongeBob walks in carrying sand pizza boxes and wearing a Krusty Krab sand hat] ;s1e5_4 SpongeBob; Did anyone order twenty pepperoni and sand pizzas? [he and Sandy laugh together. Larry walks up] ;s1e5_5 Larry; Hey, Sandy. Hey, SpongeBob. ;s1e5_6 Sandy; Hey, Larry. ;s1e5_7 Larry; You guys wanna go lift some weights? ;s1e5_8 Sandy; Sure. [she and Larry walk off] Well, come on, SpongeBob. [SpongeBob's sand pizzas and hat fall flat as he walks on dejectedly] ;s1e5_9 SpongeBob; [disappointingly] Coming. [cut to a group of weightlifters, each grunting as they work out. Larry turns to Sandy] ;s1e5_10 Larry; Give it a try, Sandy. [Sandy stands in front of a weight. She picks it up, grunting as she does so. The crowd cheers for her, and she throws the weight down] ;s1e5_11 SpongeBob; Good job, Sandy. Well, that's about enough for today, don't you think? [tries to walk off] ;s1e5_12 Larry; How about a little more weight? [bends down to pick up a weight heavier than Sandy's] Observe. [grunts as he picks it up, his eyes bulging, and veins stick out from his neck. The crowd cheers, and Larry throws the weight down] ;s1e5_13 SpongeBob; All right, stand back, everyone. [picks up a single twig from the ground. The crowd is silent. He sinks into the sand. Sandy walks to a weight] ;s1e5_14 Sandy; Y'all watch this! [picks up an anchor weight. The crowd cheers for her, but stop when they realize Larry has lifted the spectator stands] Way to go, Larry! [SpongeBob burrows into the sand, and tunnels over to Incidental 36 who is picnicking next to a marshmallow sack] ;s1e5_15 SpongeBob; Could I borrow a couple of these? ;s1e5_16 SpongeBob; [takes two marshmallows and places them on the twig] And now, with the addition of 2, count 'em, 2 marshmallows. [preps himself for his lift, inhales deeply, takes hold of the twig, and is unable to lift it. The crowd isn't moved. He tries again. And again. After a huge effort, SpongeBob hears a rip. He looks down and notices that he's ripped his pants. The crowd gasps, then laughs at SpongeBob. SpongeBob scuttles off, embarrassed. Scooter walks over, laughing] ;s1e5_17 Scooter; That was too funny. [slaps SpongeBob on the back] You are hilarious! ;s1e5_18 Sandy; Ain't he the funniest little Sponge you ever saw? [SpongeBob grins widely which gave him an idea. Cut to Larry with a volleyball on his claw] ;s1e5_19 Larry; Anybody up for some volleyball? [the ball volleys back and forth, until Larry spikes it into some fish and the crowd cheers for him. SpongeBob looks at him in contempt. A fish serves the ball and as Larry is about to hit it, SpongeBob interferes] ;s1e5_20 SpongeBob; I got it! [the ball falls and SpongeBob tries to serve it] Incoming! [the serve misses and the crowd boos. He bends down to pick the ball up and rips his pants] Oops, I guess I ripped my pants again! [the crowd laughs. Scooter walks in laughing again] ;s1e5_21 Scooter; Once again, dude, [slaps SpongeBob on the back] you have split my sides! [he continues to laugh. Cut to a tossed Frisbee. Larry catches it and throws it to Sandy] ;s1e5_22 SpongeBob; Hey, Sandy, how about throwing it to me? ;s1e5_23 Sandy; Okay, here it comes! [SpongeBob stands still and lets the Frisbee hit him on the head, knocking him over] ;s1e5_24 SpongeBob; I could use a hand here! [laughs. Sandy walks over and helps him up] ;s1e5_25 Sandy; You okay, SpongeBob? ;s1e5_26 SpongeBob; I guess so... [does a handstand, revealing his pants] ...except I ripped my pants! [the crowd laughs, and Scooter walks up to SpongeBob once again] ;s1e5_27 Scooter; You still got it, dude! [slaps SpongeBob on the back again. Cut to SpongeBob and Sandy walking to an ice cream vendor] ;s1e5_28 SpongeBob; I'll take a banana split. ;s1e5_29 SpongeBob; That's okay. I already split my pants! Get it? [Sandy giggles] ;s1e5_30 SpongeBob; How about ripple? [does so, Sandy giggles again] No, thanks, already got one! [Sandy drops laughing, Incidental 39 is unamused, and SpongeBob happily bounces off to a snack bar. SpongeBob runs up to Incidental 40, knocking his drink over] Is that a burger you're eating? ;s1e5_31 SpongeBob; You know what would go good with that? ;s1e5_32 SpongeBob; [whispers] Ripped... pants. [smiles widely and shows the annoyed Incidental 40 his ripped pants. SpongeBob then runs around the snack bar, laughing. He comes up in-between two fish] Ripped pants a la mode! [rips his pants, the fish are annoyed. Cut to SpongeBob being in the kitchen of the snack bar, next to the fry cook] Delivery! Did you order twenty cases of ripped pants? [shoves his behind through the box, revealing his ripped pants, then laughs and the box is revealed to have no lower part. The fry cook groans disgustedly. Cut to a broadcasting booth over looking the lagoon] ;s1e5_33 Sports guy; Surf's up in the Goo Lagoon. [fish are surfing. Close-up of Perch Perkins] And here comes Larry, doing his trademark lay-back. [cut to Larry lying on his surfboard] There goes Sandy, hanging ten... fingers, that is. [cut to Sandy doing a handstand on her surfboard] There goes SpongeBob... [rip] ripping his pants again. [The sports guy is annoyed, then cut to SpongeBob ripping his pants on his surfboard. A wave knocks SpongeBob off his surfboard and washes him up on the beach] ;s1e5_34 Sandy;SpongeBob!;s1e5_35 SpongeBob; [to Incidental 155] Come closer. [a divine light shines on him] I need... I need... ;s1e5_36 SpongeBob; [pats Incidental 155 on the shoulder. Close up of SpongeBob's mouth] A tailor. [the light turns off, accompanied by a light switch] Because I ripped my pants! [laughs. Incidental 155 makes an annoyed expression, drops SpongeBob, and the crowd surrounding him walks off with annoyance. SpongeBob is left alone and Sandy walks up to him angry] ;s1e5_37 Sandy; That wasn't funny, SpongeBob! Y'all had me worried sick! [walks off as Scooter walks towards SpongeBob and looks at him sadly] ;s1e5_38 Scooter; [shakes his head] Dude... [walks off. Cut to a dressing tent, with SpongeBob inside] ;s1e5_39 SpongeBob;" [thinking] Come on, SpongeBob, you're losing them! Think! Your public's waiting. [speaking] Let's see... [checking them off a list] ""Lifting weights - big laugh,"" ""Frisbee in face - kills,"" ""Surfing - knocks 'em dead,"" ""Pretending to drown,"" [uses his pencil to write the word ""NO"" and circle it] No. Come on, think! I got it! Hey, everybody! [runs out of the dressing tent] Not ripped pants! [tears his pants off] Pants ripped off. Huh? Someone call the police. There's a pants thief on the loose! [the wind howls, SpongeBob standing alone on the beach. A tumbleweed rolls by. SpongeBob turns and hears party music at a distance, and sees Larry and Sandy playing volleyball] Oh, no, everybody's gone, even Sandy. She'd rather hang out with Larry! Oh, no. [lies on the beach as he continues saying, no] We blew it, pants. [throws his pants aside] ";s1e5_40 Pants;" What do you mean, ""we?"" [the pants walk off, leaving SpongeBob alone] ";s1e5_41 SpongeBob; Oh, I didn't have to be a fool to get Sandy's attention. Am I the biggest loser on the beach?! [Incidental 22 walks up to SpongeBob, shining red] ;s1e5_42 SpongeBob; Ouch. [a fish walks up to the two] ;s1e5_43 Loser; No, I am. I got sand in my buns. [shows them two sandy hamburger buns. There is a rumbling coming from the sand and a whale pops his head out of the sand] ;s1e5_44 Frank; No, I'm the biggest loser on the beach. They buried me in the sand and forgot me. ;s1e5_45 All; What happened to you? ;s1e5_46 SpongeBob; I lost my best friend. ;s1e5_47 All; How? [SpongeBob grabs a sand guitar and sings he is front of the sand castle and a sand telephone he built earlier] ;s1e5_48 SpongeBob;" When I ripped... [his underwear starts ripping] my pants. [starts to sing] I thought that I had everybody by my side, but I went and blew it all sky-high, and now she won't even spare a passing glance, [The curtain comes down and a spotlight shines on SpongeBob] all just because I [rips his underwear again] ripped my pants. [the other three ""losers of the beach"" assemble on a sand stage with sand instruments and sing] ";s1e5_49 All; When big Larry came round just to put him down, SpongeBob turned into a clown, and no girl ever wants to dance with a fool who went and [Incidental 22 turns around and suddenly, her bottom then rips, splitting open, revealing her white underwear] ripped his pants! ;s1e5_50 All; Or sand in your buns! [instrumental break. The loser scrapes the two buns together to make a rhythm then the curtain shows waves crashing about] ;s1e5_51 SpongeBob; Now I learned a lesson I won't soon forget... so listen and you won't regret. Be true to yourself;s1e5_52 Sandy;SpongeBob!;s1e5_53 SpongeBob; Sandy! [she gets onstage and hugs SpongeBob. He returns the embrace] ;s1e5_54 Sandy; Your song is true. If y'all want to be my friend, just be yourself. [Larry walks up] ;s1e5_55 Larry; [impressed with SpongeBob's singing during the big concert] SpongeBob, that was so righteous. [hands SpongeBob a pencil] Would you... sign my pants? ;s1e5_56 SpongeBob;" Absolutely, buddy. [SpongeBob bends down to sign Larry's pants. His underwear then rips off completely, leaving SpongeBob ""au naturel."" Someone off-screen whistles. SpongeBob covers his crotch, grins, and blushes sheepishly] ";s1e5_57 {system}; [Opens in on a bunch of jellyfish and one flying out of the field towards Conch Street];s1e6_1 French Narrator ; Ah, ze early morning in Bikini Bottom, when the jellyfish are buzzing about and making their jellyfish jelly. [A jellyfish flies by SpongeBob's house. Just then a giant periscope comes out of the porthole] Oh, what is happening here? [SpongeBob is looking through the periscope from inside, Patrick waits behind him] Collectors? [SpongeBob nods to Patrick. They both run toward two vents: one square-shaped, one circular-shaped. SpongeBob takes the square one and Patrick takes the circle one. The two approach ropes and slide down them. At the bottom, they encounter a case of rope burn and jump around frantically. They blow their hands to remove the burn. Once the burn is gone, the two get serious again and approach a closet. It houses three sets of poles and three sets of nets. SpongeBob and Patrick take one of each, connect them and test their mobility. SpongeBob puts on his glasses and the two seriously step out ready for action. A jellyfish flies by and the two joyfully sing and follow it] ;s1e6_2 SpongeBob;[off-screen] I think I've got it! Wait a minute... [we hear jellyfish stings and SpongeBob and Patrick screaming. The two run back the way they came, being chased by the jellyfish. They fall into a heap in front of Squidward's house. The jellyfish stings both of their backsides and flies off. Just then, Squidward comes out of his house with his bike] ;s1e6_3 Squidward;Hm.;s1e6_4 SpongeBob; Hey, Squidward, we're jellyfishing. ;s1e6_5 Squidward; Of course you are. Bye now. [walks off] ;s1e6_6 SpongeBob; Wait! We made a net especially for you! [holds it up] Do you want to come with us? ;s1e6_7 Squidward; [sarcastically] Really? Jellyfishing with you guys? Oh, that would be the best day ever in my book! I would love to go jellyfishing! I can't think of anything I'd like to do more on my day off than go jellyfishing with my two best friends: SpongeBob and... uh... ;s1e6_8 Patrick;Patrick.;s1e6_9 Squidward; Right. But I can't. Bye bye. ;s1e6_10 SpongeBob; Next time? ;s1e6_11 Squidward; Oh sure, right! Whatever. [bikes away under breath] Like that'll ever happen. ;s1e6_12 SpongeBob; You know, Patrick? It always seems like Squidward never has time for fun. ;s1e6_13 Patrick; Maybe he doesn't like us. ;s1e6_14 SpongeBob; No, are you kidding? We're his best friends. [Squidward bikes down a path, chuckling to himself] ;s1e6_15 Squidward; Jellyfishing. [as he laughs, his nose inflates and deflates] Oh, I'll go. [laughs] I sure had them going. [laughs. But, he doesn't see a jellyfish which is going in the opposite direction. He keeps on laughing. The jellyfish ends up swimming in Squidward's mouth and he coughs it out] Stupid jellyfish! Beat it! [He hits it, and the jellyfish goes up his shirt and starts zapping him, causing Squidward to veer out of control. His tentacles get tangled on the pedals and he trips on a rock. He bounces down a hill and then falls down a jagged rocky cliff. He reaches the bottom of the cliff and immediately an atomic explosion appears.] Ow... ;s1e6_16 {system};" [Cut to SpongeBob sitting at his house. He looks out the window. But, no one is there. He sits down again. He notices a photo of him and an unhappy Squidward that reads, ""Friends."" He puts it down and looks out the window again. Squidward, who's in a wheelchair and all bandaged up rolls down the path]";s1e6_17 SpongeBob; Squid's back! [phones Patrick, which causes the screen to split diagonally, revealing Patrick on the bottom] ;s1e6_19 Patrick;Yello?;s1e6_20 SpongeBob; Hey, Patrick, Squid's home! And we're gonna make sure he's greeted by his two best friends! ;s1e6_21 Patrick; Oh, great! Who are they? [it's revealed that the two are phoning each other from across the room, just with different wallpapers] ;s1e6_22 SpongeBob;" Us! [the two hang up] Let's go! [Squidward wheels himself into his house. The lights suddenly turn on, and party horns can be heard. SpongeBob and Patrick are inside his house with a banner that says ""Welcome Home""] Welcome home, Squidward! ";s1e6_23 Patrick; Merry Christmas! ;s1e6_24 SpongeBob; We're gonna make this your best day ever! [Squidward turns around and wheels out. SpongeBob rolls him back in] Well, your best day's sure not gonna be out there. [SpongeBob wheels Squidward to a table where Patrick stands by a bowl of soup] ;s1e6_25 Patrick;" How about some soup on your best day ever? [Squidward looks at the soup and sees condensed Alphabet Soup letters spelling out, ""Best Day Ever"" Patrick holds up a spoon] Here we go! [scoops some up, but Squidward makes some grunting noises in refusal] Oh, it's a little hot. [blows on the spoon, sending steaming hot soup splashing all over Squidward's bandaged face. Patrick notices his spoon is empty and refills it to blow on, covering Squidward in more hot soup. This continues for three times until SpongeBob pulls the soup bowl away and laughs nervously] ";s1e6_26 SpongeBob; I don't think soup is the best thing for him on his best day ever. [walks near a music stand and Squidward's clarinet] How about some music on your best day ever? Played on your very own clarinet. [blows into it, but wind comes out causing Squidward to groan] Sorry, my lips are a little dry. [wets his lips exaggeratedly long and wet. Just when he prepares to blow, a disgusted Patrick snatches the clarinet away] ;s1e6_27 Patrick; Music isn't best either! ;s1e6_28 SpongeBob; But what is best is what we saved for last. The one sure-fire thing to make your best day ever the best day ever! [cut to SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidward in Jellyfish Fields. SpongeBob and Patrick hold nets] ;s1e6_29 {system}; [chanting] Jellyfishing, jellyfishing, jellyfishing, jellyfishing, jellyfishing, jellyfishing, jellyfishing, jellyfishing, jellyfishing! ;s1e6_30 SpongeBob; This is Jellyfish Fields, where wild jellyfish roam just waiting to be captured. [Squidward rides away, but SpongeBob catches him] No, no, Squid! Over here! I know you're eager, but you don't even have your net. Patrick, fix him up while I find him a good specimen. ;s1e6_31 Patrick; Firmly grasp it in your hand. [places the pole end on Squidward's bandaged hand, but it falls because he can't grab, Patrick picks it up] Firmly grasp it. [does it again and the results are the same. Patrick gets frustrated] Firmly grasp it. [forcefully jabs the net through Squidward's bandaged hand. Squidward lets out a muffled pained scream] That ought to do it. [SpongeBob spots a jellyfish] ;s1e6_32 SpongeBob; There's one in position. Ready... set... go! [the two yell out words of encouragement to Squidward and jump up and down, but Squidward isn't budging. The two eventually notice Squidward isn't going anywhere. They again encourage him, but still nothing happens] ;s1e6_33 Patrick;" I think we gotta show him how it's done. [in the tune of ""The Beautiful Blue Danube,"" SpongeBob and Patrick dance along next to the jellyfish and try to catch it. SpongeBob and Patrick sing, and even the jellyfish hums out some music. After several attempts, they get into a big fight with stinging and such. The jellyfish escapes the squabbles and swims by Squidward and stings him on the nose. Squidward, mad, goes after the jellyfish. SpongeBob and Patrick, still getting stung by jellyfish, notice] ";s1e6_34 SpongeBob;" Hey, look! Squid's doing it! [as Squidward chases, SpongeBob and Patrick cheer him on. His wheelchair is stopped by a rock, but he eventually gets back on track. The jellyfish lands on a pink ""rock"" and Squidward catches it. He laughs triumphantly, but muffled due to the bandages and whacks the net against the ""rock."" The ""rock"" surfaces, revealing to be a really huge jellyfish--the Queen Jellyfish. She now floats above Squidward. Squidward gulps. SpongeBob and Patrick look on.] ";s1e6_35 Patrick; This guy's good. ;s1e6_36 SpongeBob; He's a natural! ;s1e6_37 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick start simultaneously cheering Squidward on as he tries to get away from the Queen Jellyfish.] ;s1e6_38 Patrick; Yeah, you got it, Squidward! ;s1e6_39 SpongeBob; Yeah, you're doing great! Go, Squid, go! ;s1e6_40 Patrick; Yeah, you're doing it, Squid! See what you've been missing?! ;s1e6_41 SpongeBob; Yeah, you got, Squid! ;s1e6_42 Patrick; You got what you wanted, Squidward! You can go that distance! Use that net! ;s1e6_43 SpongeBob; Be the net! ;s1e6_44 Patrick; Yeah! You're feeling it, Squid! That's it, all the way! The last 6 miles, make that, Squid! Go, go, go! ;s1e6_45 SpongeBob; Yeah, go by the eye of the tiger, by the eye of the tiger, by the eye of the tiger! Better, better, better! Yeah, yeah, yeah! You've got it now! ;s1e6_46 Patrick; It's in the bag! ;s1e6_47 SpongeBob; This is really your best day ever, isn't it? ;s1e6_48 {system}; [The Queen Jellyfish gives Squidward an extremely powerful sting. SpongeBob and Patrick stop cheering.] ;s1e6_49 Both;Oooh...;s1e6_50 {system}; [Cut to the next day where SpongeBob and Patrick walking in front of Squidward's place covered in bandages] ;s1e6_51 SpongeBob; Hey, Patrick. Well... [sighs] Thought yesterday went... [hesitates] pretty well, don't you think? ;s1e6_52 Patrick; I had fun. ;s1e6_53 SpongeBob; Me too. [some whirring is heard in the background] ;s1e6_54 Patrick; Here comes Squidward! ;s1e6_55 SpongeBob; Oh, great. [Squidward approaches in a stretcher] Hey, Squid! How about that... [Squidward rolls down the front walk in a wheeled medical bed with a container of life-saving fluid and in a full body cast.] ...best day ever? ;s1e6_56 Patrick; There's always tomorrow! [Squidward's bed bangs on the door, trying to get in] ;s1e6_57 SpongeBob; Um, we're really sorry about what happened yesterday, Squidward. [bangs the door again] Um, we got you a present! [it's the jellyfish that caused Squidward to encounter the Queen Jellyfish in a jar] It's the jellyfish. [Squidward scowls] ;s1e6_58 Patrick; You know, from yesterday! ;s1e6_59 SpongeBob; You're not still mad, are you? [Squidward opens the jar in SpongeBob and Patrick's direction] ;s1e6_60 Patrick; Yup, he's still mad. [The jellyfish chases after SpongeBob and Patrick and stings them repeatedly as they run into the distance. Squidward laughs to himself, his nose inflating and deflating again. The Queen Jellyfish returns and zaps him again. Now he's burnt to a crisp. The cast cracks off in pieces, leaving a completely blackened Squidward] ;s1e6_61 Squidward;Ow.;s1e6_62 {system}; [View of the Krusty Krab] ;s1e7_1 Squidward; [from inside] One Krabby Patty for table two. SpongeBob, I don't have the whole day. ;s1e7_2 {system}; [Cut to inside of the kitchen] ;s1e7_3 SpongeBob; [speaking in French accent] Oui, oui. Un Krabby Patty, Monsieur. First, les patty. [flips it up in the air and it falls into one of his holes. He holds up the other ingredients.] ;s1e7_4 Squidward; Come on, SpongeBob! ;s1e7_5 SpongeBob; Next, les ingredients. [throws them in the air] Ah, oui! [catches them in his holes and his pants] Les mustard. [squirts some mustard out and it lands in his eye] ;s1e7_6 Squidward; Les quit fooling around, where's my Krabby Patty? ;s1e7_7 SpongeBob; Les hold on a second! [takes his head and shakes it all up. When he puts it back on his body, his eyes roll around.] And...voila. [goes up to Squidward and pulls a Krabby Patty from under his nose speaking in normal voice] It's under your nose! [laughs and puts it on a plate. Squidward pretends to laugh.] ;s1e7_8 Squidward; You're killing me, SpongeBob! Ha ha ha... you really are. [Close-up on the patty] ;s1e7_9 SpongeBob; Look at it, Squidward. Mr. Krabs' gift to all of Bikini Bottom -- the Krabby Patty.. ;s1e7_10 Squidward; Okay, give it to me. [the Krabby Patty flies off of the plate and starts bouncing all over the place] Come on SpongeBob, stop it! ;s1e7_11 SpongeBob; I swear I'm not doing anything. Mr. Krabs! The Krabby Patty is haunted! [The patty slithers out the door and heads for the exit. Mr. Krabs spears it with his leg. A tiny thing comes out from it and Mr. Krabs inspects it with a magnifying glass.] ;s1e7_12 Mr. Krabs ; Avast, ye patty pirate! This is no ghost. This is... [view of in the magnifying glass, of a tiny jelly bean-shaped green creature with one eye] Plankton! Stealing me booty! ;s1e7_13 Plankton; Hear me, Krabs! When I discover your formula for Krabby Patties, I'll run you out of business! I went to college! [Mr. Krabs picks up the puny pest] Hey! Let me go! ;s1e7_14 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, I'll let you go, squirt. On a flying saucer! [laughs, then splats Plankton on a plate and spins him back across the street, to the Chum Bucket] Back to the Chum Bucket with you! ;s1e7_15 Plankton; You'll pay for this, Krabs! [slams through the doors] ;s1e7_16 SpongeBob; Uh... Plankton, sir? ;s1e7_17 Mr. Krabs ; Aye, he's been trying to steal me secret formula for years, but you haven't got it yet, have ye, bug? [laughs. SpongeBob joins in, braying with laughter. Mr. Krabs stops, but SpongeBob keeps laughing.] Okay. [SpongeBob keeps laughing] Enough, lad, it wasn't that funny. [SpongeBob keeps laughing] Get back to work! [SpongeBob stops laughing.] ;s1e7_18 {system}; [Cut to nighttime at the Krusty Krab.] ;s1e7_19 SpongeBob; [from inside] Okay, Mr. Krabs, see you tomorrow! ;s1e7_20 Mr. Krabs ; Good night, me boy! [SpongeBob walks out and walks past the Chum Bucket contently] ;s1e7_21 Plankton; [unseen] Psst... young man. [SpongeBob looks around to see where this voice came from] Yes, over here. Come on, boy, a little closer. [SpongeBob walks forward] Closer... [SpongeBob walks] Not that close! [a crunching sound is heard. SpongeBob lifts up his shoe revealing a squished Plankton.] You blasted barnacle head! I mean... hi. ;s1e7_22 SpongeBob; Plankton? [SpongeBob peels Plankton off his shoe and onto his hand] ;s1e7_23 Plankton;Ouch!;s1e7_24 SpongeBob; What do you want? ;s1e7_25 Plankton; I just want to talk. You could say we're friends, right? ;s1e7_26 SpongeBob; Um... no. ;s1e7_27 Plankton;Acquaintances?;s1e7_28 SpongeBob;No.;s1e7_29 Plankton; [beat] Well, we're both invertebrates, aren't we? ;s1e7_30 SpongeBob; I... guess so. ;s1e7_31 Plankton; You see? Everything works out. I have something for you. I've been keeping it in my secret compartment. [rummages through his back pocket and takes out a golden spatula] Ching! [in unison with the sparkling of the spatula] Sparkle, sparkle. ;s1e7_32 SpongeBob; Wow! A golden spatula! And it's even got my name on it. ;s1e7_33 Plankton; It's a gift! A gift from a friend. [hugs SpongeBob's thumb] Friends give each other gifts, and tomorrow is my birthday. [puts a birthday hat on his head and SpongeBob's thumb and then blows a noisemaker. He then takes out a cake.] And you know what I'd like more than anything in the whole wide world? [blows out the candles] ;s1e7_34 SpongeBob; A booster seat? [Plankton takes off the hat and throws out the cake] ;s1e7_35 Plankton; Booster seat? Hot dog! I mean, no. What I want for my birthday from you, my friend, is one of those [starts to drool] tender... delicious... Krabby Patties! [SpongeBob drops Plankton and gasps] ;s1e7_36 SpongeBob; You just want to be friends so you can get your hands on a Krabby Patty! And I bet it's not even your birthday tomorrow! ;s1e7_37 Plankton; Gee, and I thought you were stupid. ;s1e7_38 SpongeBob; You'll never get a Krabby Patty from me! [walks off, then stops] Even if we are friends! [runs off] Never, never, never, never! ;s1e7_39 Plankton; Oh, I'll get a Krabby Patty and you're gonna hand-deliver it to me personally! You weak-minded fool! [takes out a gramophone that plays evil music and laughs evilly to it.] ;s1e7_40 {system}; [Cut to SpongeBob's bedroom, where SpongeBob goes to sleep.] ;s1e7_41 SpongeBob; Good night, Gary. ;s1e7_42 {system}; [Gary meows. SpongeBob goes to sleep. Just then, one of the flowers on SpongeBob's bed pattern pops up. It's Plankton in disguise, wearing a backpack that looks more like an antenna-like machine.] ;s1e7_43 Plankton; [chuckling] SpongeBob, you will be mine! [pulls out the gramophone and laughs evilly to it, but it actually plays a children's song of the A-B-C's.] ;s1e7_44 {system}; [Plankton immediately realizes this and flips the record around on the other side. It plays the evil music like last time and he laughs. Then he walks through one of SpongeBob's holes and begins his journey. Plankton reads a map that looks like a regular road map, except with a giant brain in the middle of it.] ;s1e7_45 Plankton;" It should be in here... but where? [pan out to reveal he's standing on the brain] Where? Oh... [takes off the antenna thing on his back] This will be the beginning of the end! [outside, SpongeBob rolls to his left in his sleep. The brain falls to the right inside and Plankton falls off] Ouch! Stupid brain... [gives chase] Come back here, you swine! [SpongeBob then rolls to his right. Inside, the brain squishes Plankton. SpongeBob then sleeps on his back and the brain stops rolling. Plankton holds up a roll of duct tape] That's it, brain, you're going down! [Plankton uses tape to hold it down] Yes, yes, that's grand. [takes out blueprints] And now, for my very elaborate and college-educated plan. [the blueprints reveal a picture of the antenna thing labeled ""Control"" and an arrow pointing to a picture of a brain labeled ""Brain."" Plankton follows these instructions by jamming the control in the brain] And now, it's time for a little wakey-uppy. [his hands on the control levers, he uses his foot to press the ""Total Control"" button. Outside, SpongeBob wakes up.] ";s1e7_46 SpongeBob; Morning already? [Plankton jams the controls causing SpongeBob's legs to jam out to his side. He rumbles and falls down. Plankton laughs evilly] I... I feel a little funny today. [using the controls, he makes SpongeBob walk. Plankton laughs] ;s1e7_47 Plankton; I have you now! [outside, SpongeBob keeps walking towards the kitchen] ;s1e7_48 SpongeBob; Time for a well-balanced breakfast. [rams through the wall and through his refrigerator, emerging with bread, a bottle of milk, and an egg carton on his head] This isn't what I had in mind. [walks towards the straps with his pants attached] Let me just grab my pants. [walks toward them and they spring him. He eventually gives free and keeps walking.] I guess I'm not wearing any pants today. [crashes through the side of the wall] I guess I'm not using the door either. See you later, Gary! ...I guess. [Gary meows] You're right, Gary! There is something wrong with me! Squidward! Squidward! Wake up! I need some help! [inside Squidward's house, he tries to sleep. Off-screen.] Squidward! Help! ;s1e7_49 Squidward; Be quiet, SpongeBob! ;s1e7_50 {system}; [SpongeBob bursts through the wall of Squidward's bedroom] ;s1e7_51 SpongeBob;Help!;s1e7_52 Squidward; SpongeBob! What are you doing? I'm talking to you! SpongeBob! SpongeBob, are you mad?! ;s1e7_53 {system}; [SpongeBob turns his head to Squidward] ;s1e7_54 Plankton; [through SpongeBob] Shut your mouth, you mediocre clarinet player. ;s1e7_55 Squidward; Mediocre? [from inside, Plankton speaks through a microphone] ;s1e7_56 Plankton; You pretentious, little insignificant artist. Your snivelly creations are worth less than a protozoan's waste! ;s1e7_57 {system}; [SpongeBob snaps out of confusion] ;s1e7_58 SpongeBob; Something must be wrong with my brain! [his eyes roll into the back of his head and he sees Plankton and gasps] Plankton! [Plankton raises his eyebrow] What kind of friend are you?! ;s1e7_59 Plankton; Nonsense. You never liked me, anyway. You wouldn't even come to my birthday party! [from outside] ;s1e7_60 SpongeBob; Get out of my head! Leave my brain alone! ;s1e7_61 Plankton; Never! Never! [laughs and SpongeBob walks out backwards. Squidward turns pale and faints. SpongeBob crashes through Patrick's rock and reemerges with Patrick sleeping on his head. SpongeBob throws him off and he's pinned into the ground. SpongeBob walks toward the Krusty Krab. Inside SpongeBob.] Toot toot! How about a little take-out? ;s1e7_62 SpongeBob; No! No, never! [crashes through it, reemerging with a Krabby Patty. Plankton laughs evilly.] You can't fool me, Plankton, you want the Krabby Patty formula! [walks into the Chum Bucket] ;s1e7_63 Plankton; You are going to hand-deliver it to me personally! ;s1e7_64 SpongeBob; No, no, no! [they're inside and walk through a door] There's no one here. ;s1e7_65 Plankton; Don't remind me. Brace yourself, SpongeBob. This is my lab! [the room he's walked into has a screen with a live-action Labrador Retriever. The dog barks. They walk into the next room, a real lab.] And this is my laboratory! And did I ever show you my record player? [pulls the gramophone out again and it plays dramatic music and laughs] ;s1e7_66 SpongeBob; I must fight! [mumbles nonsensically, stretches his head out, and bites against the side of the door. His body keeps trying to walk.] ;s1e7_67 Plankton; No, no, no, no. [pushes the levers forward, which causes SpongeBob to lose grip and slam against the wall and wobble over to a giant funnel thing] There, you see how much easier it is when you help, friend? How do you like my analyzer? It tells the ingredients of whatever I put into it. [A robot arm clenching some seaweed comes in and drops it in the giant funnel analyzer. It has zapped and some beeping is heard from the giant computer screen. The screen, then reads what the computer says.] ;s1e7_68 Karen; Seaweed: 50% Sea, 50% Weed. [a picture of the seaweed appears] ;s1e7_69 Plankton; Impressed? Now let's reveal that secret formula. [laughs and pulls the lever forward, letting two of SpongeBob's fingers off the patty. He's holding it with both hands, so one finger from each hand.] And this little piggy brought home a Krabby Patty. [two more fingers loose grip.] This little piggy will help me drop it in. Any last words, SpongeBob SecretPants? [SpongeBob tries to resist, but stops] ;s1e7_70 SpongeBob; I just have to say I'm sorry I let Mr. Krabs down. [tears start to come out of his eyes] I let all of Bikini Bottom down. But worst of all, I let you down, [one of his teary eyes twinkles] you delicate little Krabby Patty? ;s1e7_71 Plankton;Mmm...;s1e7_72 SpongeBob; [tearing up even more] With your tasty, juicy, scrumptious, warm, steamy goodness. [inside, Plankton starts to get hungry] ;s1e7_73 Plankton; Steamy... [a live-action patty gets assembled on screen as SpongeBob states the ingredients] ;s1e7_74 SpongeBob; I'll never forget your 100% all-secret patty, secretly assembled with undersea cheese, pickles, lettuce, tomato, onion, all secretly steamed between two fluffy seaweed-sea buns. [inside, Plankton starts to drool excessively] ;s1e7_75 Plankton; Yes... yes... yes! [jumps out of one of SpongeBob's holes to the patty] Come to papa! [bounces off the patty and lands in the analyzer] Oh, boy... [now zapped and the computer reads out the analysis] ;s1e7_76 Karen; Plankton: 1% evil, 99% hot gas. [Plankton appears on the screen] ;s1e7_77 Plankton; Well, this stinks. ;s1e7_78 SpongeBob; Well, patty, I guess we can go home now. [walks out] ;s1e7_79 Plankton; SpongeBob, that's my Krabby Patty! [SpongeBob walks out the swivel doors and they go back and forth] Give it back, you porous freak! I command you! My patty! [the doors come to a close] No! I'll settle for some fries. ;s1e7_80 {system}; [Squidward gets dressed, takes a shower, gargles, and brushes his teeth. He re-enters the scene in a tuxedo with his hairpiece and sits down at the table. He hears laughter from outside. He goes to the window and notices that SpongeBob and Patrick are playing with bubbles. SpongeBob whispers into a bubble and it floats over to Patrick and pops.] ;s1e8_1 SpongeBobBubble; Hi, Patrick. ;s1e8_2 {system}; [Patrick giggles as he was about to blow a bubble. He eats the bubble and whispers into another bubble, sending it over to SpongeBob where it pops.] ;s1e8_3 PatrickBubble; Hi, SpongeBob. ;s1e8_4 SpongeBob; [whispering into bubble] Patrick, you're my best friend in the whole neighborhood. ;s1e8_5 {system}; [The scene cuts to Squidward's back window as he finishes stirring the liquid, and blows a bubble with it through the fork. Squidward's bubble is approached by SpongeBob's bubble, grows a leg, and kicks SpongeBob's bubble, thus popping it. Squidward's bubble floats over to Patrick and pops.] ;s1e8_6 SquidwardBubble; [mimicking SpongeBob] Patrick, you are the dumbest idiot it has ever been my misfortune to know. ;s1e8_7 {system}; [Patrick frowns and blows a bubble, sending it over to SpongeBob] ;s1e8_8 PatrickBubble; Do you really think that, SpongeBob? ;s1e8_9 SpongeBob; [whispering into the bubble] Of course, Patrick. Anyone with eyes can see that. ;s1e8_10 {system}; [The bubble floats over to Patrick and pops, followed by another bubble floating back over to SpongeBob] ;s1e8_11 PatrickBubble; Yeah? Well, I think you're ugly. [another bubble comes over and pops] Yellow is ugly! [two other bubbles, but smaller, float over and pops, both containing raspberry noises for SpongeBob] ;s1e8_12 SpongeBob; [talks into the bubble, puzzled] Patrick, what are you talking about? ;s1e8_13 {system}; [The bubble floats over to Patrick. Another of Squidward's bubbles floats over to SpongeBob and pops] ;s1e8_14 SquidwardBubble; [mimicking Patrick] SpongeBob, I no longer wish to know you. ;s1e8_15 {system}; [SpongeBob gasps] ;s1e8_16 SquidwardBubble; [mimicking Patrick] You give bottom dwellers a bad name. ;s1e8_17 {system}; [Squidward creates several other bubbles and they float over to SpongeBob] ;s1e8_18 SquidwardBubble; [mimicking Patrick] If I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have one dollar! ;s1e8_19 {system}; [Squidward chuckles. Another bubble floats over to Patrick] ;s1e8_20 SquidwardBubble; [mimicking SpongeBob] Hey, Patrick, I heard there was a job opening down at the pet shop... as some newspaper! ;s1e8_21 Patrick; [stands up and yells at SpongeBob] Well, that makes you a big dummy, you dummy! ;s1e8_22 SpongeBob; [stands up and yells at Patrick] Yeah, well, that means that, uhh... so are you! ;s1e8_23 Patrick; Right, you're a turkey! ;s1e8_24 SpongeBob; What's that? ;s1e8_25 {system}; [Squidward arrives outside with a lawn chair and his souffle] ;s1e8_26 Patrick; It's what you are! ;s1e8_27 {system}; [Squidward begins to laugh hysterically at SpongeBob and Patrick's arguing.] ;s1e8_28 SpongeBob; Well, you're a bigger one! ;s1e8_29 Patrick; Well, you're still yellow! And you know what else is yellow? ;s1e8_30 SpongeBob;What?;s1e8_31 Patrick; You are! ;s1e8_32 SpongeBob; Yeah? Well, it doesn't matter what you call me, 'cause I never wanna see you again anyway! [goes inside through the back door and turns around] Aww, tartar sauce! [shuts the door, some houses in the background briefly jump of their foundations] ;s1e8_33 {system}; [Patrick angrily opens his rock, which closes and comes up sounding like an accordion.] ;s1e8_34 Patrick; Wow, Squidward, you're choking! [runs over to Squidward] Uhh... uhh, I know what to do, but I should wash my hands first. Oh, well. [takes a deep breath and performs CPR on Squidward. As he is doing this, each one of Squidward's tentacles suction cups pops up. Eventually, the fork comes out and Patrick catches it] I win! ;s1e8_35 Squidward; Wow! Patrick, you saved me! ;s1e8_36 Patrick; I did? ;s1e8_37 Squidward; Yup! You're a real lifesaver, friend! [shakes Patrick's hands] ;s1e8_38 Patrick; Friend? [holds Squidward] Friend... ;s1e8_39 Squidward; [uneasily] Yeah, Patrick, we're friends... [steps back] just friends. [they both notice SpongeBob is gazing from his window with a blank stare] ;s1e8_40 Patrick; So what are we gonna do tonight, best friend? [walks with Squidward over to the Easter Island head] ;s1e8_41 Patrick; Clarinet? I love music! ;s1e8_42 {system}; [Inside the pineapple, SpongeBob watches the two go inside Squidward's house] ;s1e8_43 SpongeBob; Ahh, who needs them? They're no fun anyway, right, Gary? [Gary is inside his shell] Gary? [knocks on his shell, it sounds hollow] ;s1e8_44 {system}; [Cut to Squidward's house] ;s1e8_45 Squidward; Squidward will be performing his version of Solitude in E minor. ;s1e8_46 Patrick; [sitting on a bench while clapping] Yeah! E minor! All right! Yeah! ;s1e8_47 {system}; [Squidward takes a deep breath and plays a note, and Patrick immediately falls asleep, to the annoyance of Squidward. Scene now cuts to SpongeBob.] ;s1e8_48 SpongeBob; Ah, what am I worried about? I got plenty of friends! I can name three right off the bat! [holds up three fingers] Uhh... ;s1e8_49 {system}; [SpongeBob draws faces on each finger with a broken smile] ;s1e8_50 SpongeBob; The gang's all here... [looks at the faces on his fingers, and his eyes well with tears] Ohhh! ;s1e8_51 {system}; [Squidward is dragging Patrick, who is still asleep, outside. Suddenly, after a few feet, his back gives out] ;s1e8_52 Squidward; Ow! Oh! My back! I threw out my back! ;s1e8_53 SpongeBob; [sees Squidward in pain] Oh, boy, now's my chance! [jumps out of the window] ;s1e8_54 Squidward; SpongeBob? No, no, stay back! ;s1e8_55 SpongeBob; [running] Don't worry, Squidward! I'm coming! ;s1e8_56 Squidward; No, no, no, get away from me! ;s1e8_57 SpongeBob; Hang on! I'll save you! [rips off his suit revealing a speedo underneath] ;s1e8_58 Squidward; [tries to get to his door] No, no! Get away from me! No, no! ;s1e8_59 SpongeBob; [jumps off a diving board] Hold on! ;s1e8_60 Squidward; No, no! Get away! [screams as SpongeBob dives into his back cracking it back into place] Oh! I'm ruined! I'm... I'm... I'm... I-I feel great! Thanks, SpongeBob! You're a real friend! ;s1e8_61 {system}; [SpongeBob smiles wide in glee] ;s1e8_62 SpongeBob;Friend...;s1e8_63 Squidward; N-no, no, no, I didn't mean that, no-no. ;s1e8_64 SpongeBob; Don't worry, Squiddy, old pal. That's what friends are for. [Squidward and SpongeBob walk to Squidward's house, an Easter Island head.] ;s1e8_65 {system}; [SpongeBob and Squidward are inside Squidward's house] ;s1e8_66 SpongeBob; So dumb Patrick fell asleep on ya, huh? Some friend. A real friend would perform for you! ;s1e8_67 Squidward; You play? ;s1e8_68 SpongeBob; Are you kidding? I've been playing bassinet for years! [takes one from the wall] Give me an A, buddy! ;s1e8_69 {system}; [Squidward plays a note and SpongeBob sings] ;s1e8_70 SpongeBob; Squidward is my best friend in the world. [grates strings with bow] Squidward is my best friend in the sea... ;s1e8_71 {system}; [The bow flies into what looks like Squidward's head and he screams. Fortunately, it turns out it's just a painting the real Squidward pulls the bow out and growls as he snaps it in half with his knee] ;s1e8_72 SpongeBob; [now playing with his fingers like a guitar] Squidward... ;s1e8_73 {system}; [Patrick, now fully awake, pops in through the window] ;s1e8_74 Patrick; Likes Patrick more than SpongeBob! [SpongeBob slams the window in Patrick's face] Oh! ;s1e8_75 SpongeBob; [strums harder before slamming the bass to the floor] And Patrick is a dirty, stinky, rotten friend stealer! [smashes the bass] Umm, I can fix this. ;s1e8_76 {system}; [Squidward is steaming red in fury.] ;s1e8_77 Squidward; Grrrrrryehhhhherrrryeh! [kicks SpongeBob out] ;s1e8_78 SpongeBob; ...So, uhh, I'll see you tomorrow, Squidward! Call me! ;s1e8_79 {system}; [Cut to Squidward's bathroom. Squidward begins walking into the bathroom.] ;s1e8_80 Squidward; Yech! That was disgusting! I feel like I need to scrub myself. [opens up the curtain and screams after he sees Patrick in his bathtub] ;s1e8_81 Patrick; Hey, buddy. I warmed it up for ya. [shows him a brush and soap] ;s1e8_82 Squidward; Patrick! Get out! And put some clothes on! ;s1e8_83 {system}; [SpongeBob peeks in through the upstairs window] ;s1e8_84 SpongeBob; What's the matter, Squidward, old buddy? [notices Patrick in the bath-tub] Oh, ho-ho! So this is what I find, huh?! My best friend and my ex-best friend and... [shown bath toys] ...rubber bath toys! ;s1e8_85 Patrick; [simultaneously] Oh, yeah?! Well, he was my friend first! ;s1e8_86 SpongeBob; [simultaneously] You're just a backbiting, backstabbing silly blob of... ;s1e8_87 Squidward; [screams] This can't be happening to me! [runs away while SpongeBob and Patrick stop their arguing as they notice Squidward's gone] ;s1e8_88 SpongeBob;Buddy!;s1e8_89 Patrick; Squidward, where are you?! ;s1e8_90 SpongeBob; Where'd ya go, friend? ;s1e8_91 Patrick; Where are ya, ol' buddy? ;s1e8_92 Squidward; [hiding in a trash can] Oh, this is nuts! I need a plan to get those two back together and outta my hair! ;s1e8_93 {system}; [Bubble transition. Cut to next scene, at SpongeBob's house. SpongeBob reads a magazine. The doorbell rings, and a letter is pushed under the door. Then he smells it] ;s1e8_94 SpongeBob; [sniffs letter] Squidward. [opens it] A dinner party? I'd love to! [knocks on Squidward's door and Squidward opens it] Did you miss me? ;s1e8_95 Squidward; Come on in! You look stunning. [shuts the door] ;s1e8_96 SpongeBob; I'd much rather dine with you than that lousy... [gasps when he sees Patrick] Say, what gives?! I'm not sitting near that maniac! ;s1e8_97 Patrick; Me neither! This was a setup! ;s1e8_98 Squidward; I thought you two were my best friends. ;s1e8_99 Squidward; [takes out a bottle of soda] Well, how about some soda, guys? [SpongeBob shows him his glass] ;s1e8_100 SpongeBob; Yes, please! [Squidward gives him some soda] Thanks, friend. [flicks Squidward's nose and drinks] ;s1e8_101 Patrick; How about some for your best friend? [SpongeBob puts his glass in front of Patrick's, so he gets the soda instead of Patrick] ;s1e8_102 SpongeBob; Thanks, best friend! [drinks] ;s1e8_103 Patrick; Can I have some now, buddy? ;s1e8_104 SpongeBob; Wait, I need some more! [pours SpongeBob another glass] ;s1e8_105 Patrick; I still didn't get any! [SpongeBob gives Patrick his soda] ;s1e8_106 SpongeBob; There ya go. More please! [Squidward fills his glass as SpongeBob drinks it really fast] ;s1e8_107 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_108 SpongeBob; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_109 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Hey, Squidward! ;s1e8_110 SpongeBob; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_111 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! [shows Squidward his glass again, but it's still full] Squidward! ;s1e8_112 Squidward; Patrick! Your glass is full! ;s1e8_113 Patrick; Oh, yeah... ;s1e8_114 SpongeBob; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_115 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Hey, Squidward! ;s1e8_116 SpongeBob; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_117 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_118 SpongeBob; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_119 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Hey, Squidward! ;s1e8_120 SpongeBob; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_121 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Hey, Squidward! ;s1e8_122 SpongeBob; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_123 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_124 SpongeBob; [shows Squidward his glass] Squidward! ;s1e8_125 Patrick; [shows Squidward his glass] Hey, Squidward! ;s1e8_126 {system}; [both show Squidward their glasses] Squidward! ;s1e8_127 Squidward; Sorry, boys, I'm all out of pop. I'm gonna go get some more. [walks away] Why don't you just stay here and chat? [closes door.] ;s1e8_128 {system}; [Then we see SpongeBob and Patrick. They are extremely fat and not wanting to look at each other. Then SpongeBob hiccups and a bubble floats up and pops that sounds like a burp. Both of them laugh and the entire house is full of bubbles as Squidward walks up to his door with a grocery bag. Then an explosion and crashing sounds are heard] ;s1e8_129 Squidward; I should just walk away right now. [opens door to find his house destroyed] What a surprise... I invited them in, and I left them alone. Well, Squidward, what have we learned today? [pieces around the door break] ;s1e8_130 SpongeBob; Guess what, Squidward? [both SpongeBob and Patrick hold each others' hips in a friendly way] ;s1e8_131 Patrick; Me and SpongeBob are friends again! ;s1e8_132 Squidward; Great, now go be friends somewhere else. ;s1e8_133 SpongeBob; Don't you want us to help you clean this up a little? ;s1e8_134 Squidward; No! Out! ;s1e8_135 {system}; [Both SpongeBob and Patrick walk out] ;s1e8_136 SpongeBob; Psst, I think he's jealous. ;s1e8_137 Patrick; How pathetic. ;s1e8_138 {system}; [Squidward shuts door hard and when he turns around as a bubble comes and pops on the door which causes the door to fall on his back] ;s1e8_139 Squidward; Ohhhhh, my back. ;s1e8_140 {system}; [SpongeBob's foghorn alarm goes off] ;s1e9_1 SpongeBob; This is it, Gary! ;s1e9_2 Gary;" Meow. [SpongeBob's bed bounces up and flings SpongeBob onto the calendar, where he lands on March 3rd with the words ""boating exam today!"" on it then drops to the floor] ";s1e9_3 SpongeBob; The big boating exam is today! I've never felt so capable! [A door opens from underneath him. He comes out of his house riding a unicycle] I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready. Squidward! Squidward! ;s1e9_4 Squidward;What?;s1e9_5 SpongeBob; I'm ready, Squidward! [rides his unicycle around Squidward's house] ;s1e9_6 Squidward; Ready to move? ;s1e9_7 SpongeBob; No, I'm ready to pass my boating test. [rides his unicycle towards Mrs. Puff's Boating School] I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready... [stops his unicycle near a dumpster and jumps off of it] I'm ready-eady-eady-eady-eady-eady-eady-eady-ready. Well, pal, I won't be needing you anymore. [throws the unicycle into the dumpster] I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready! Oh, yeah! I'm ready! ;s1e9_8 Incidental 27 ; Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Yes! Hey, I just got my license! ;s1e9_9 SpongeBob; [snaps his fingers] Hey, I'm getting mine next! ;s1e9_10 Incidental 27 ; Hey, I doubt it! [walks off] ;s1e9_11 SpongeBob; Okay, see you on the road. I'm ready! Here I come, Mrs. Puff! I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready. [jumps around the boardwalk. Camera goes inside the school, as a female pufferfish looks out the window and sees SpongeBob jumping around.] ;s1e9_12 Mrs. Puff ; [sighs] I'm not ready. [opens the door] ;s1e9_13 SpongeBob; Hi, Mrs. Puff! Today is the day I'm going to pass my boating exam! ;s1e9_14 Mrs. Puff ; [with a clipboard and a pen in hand] We'll see about that, SpongeBob. First we must... ;s1e9_15 SpongeBob; First I must pass the oral exam. I am confident in my abilities to successfully succeed. ;s1e9_16 Mrs. Puff ; I know. Okay, #1: What is the front of the boat? ;s1e9_17 SpongeBob; The bow. [Mrs. Puff writes down his answer] ;s1e9_18 Mrs. Puff ; What is the back? ;s1e9_19 SpongeBob; Stern. [Mrs. Puff writes down his answer] ;s1e9_20 Mrs. Puff ; #3: Right is... ;s1e9_21 SpongeBob; Starboard. [answers the remaining questions] Port. Skipper. Deck. Cabin. Galley. Keel. 1924. [Mrs. Puff writes down his answers] ;s1e9_22 Mrs. Puff ; You've passed the oral test. [sarcastically] What a surprise. [gets in the boat and secures herself tightly] Now it's time to once again take the driving portion of the exam. Okay, SpongeBob, get in the boat. ;s1e9_23 SpongeBob; Oh, in this boat right here? [looks at his watch] Is it time already? ;s1e9_24 Mrs. Puff ; Get in the boat, SpongeBob. ;s1e9_25 SpongeBob; Oh yeah, absolutely. [gets in and closes his eyes with a smile] ;s1e9_26 Mrs. Puff ; All you have to do is get on the track. ;s1e9_27 {system}; [SpongeBob's eyes spring open in awe he looks ahead to the track that gets longer and longer in delusion] ;s1e9_28 Mrs. Puff ; Okay, SpongeBob, what's the first thing you do? ;s1e9_29 SpongeBob;1924...?;s1e9_30 Mrs. Puff ; No, no. First thing is to start the boat. [turns the engine on and SpongeBob goes crazy] SpongeBob? SpongeBob? Relax, it's only the boat. ;s1e9_31 SpongeBob; The boat? ;s1e9_32 Mrs. Puff ; Okay, now what do you do next? ;s1e9_33 SpongeBob; Floor it? ;s1e9_34 Mrs. Puff ; Yes... no! No, don't floor it. ;s1e9_35 SpongeBob; Floor it?! ;s1e9_36 Mrs. Puff ; No, no, don't, don't floor it! ;s1e9_37 SpongeBob; Okay, floor it! [SpongeBob slams on the accelerator and starts driving backwards really fast] ;s1e9_38 Mrs. Puff ; No! No, no, no, nooooo! [the boat whizzes by some spectators before crashing into a lighthouse. After crashing, Mrs. Puff inflates to three times her size. The lighthouse falls, and Mrs. Puff speaks with a deep voice] Oh, SpongeBob, why? ;s1e9_39 Fred; My leg...! ;s1e9_40 SpongeBob; [in his bed at night] I don't know why, Gary. I don't know. I'm tired of failing that boating test. I've already taken it 37 times. ;s1e9_41 Gary;Meow.;s1e9_42 SpongeBob; Okay, 38. [puts his pillow on his head] ;s1e9_43 Gary; [puts on SpongeBob's boots] Meow. ;s1e9_44 Patrick; [over walkie-talkie in SpongeBob's bed] SpongeBob, this is Star Ranger, over. ;s1e9_45 SpongeBob; [through walkie-talkie] What is it, Patrick? ;s1e9_46 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] I got a surprise for you. ;s1e9_47 SpongeBob; [through walkie-talkie] Oh, Patrick, I'm not in the mood. ;s1e9_48 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Get out of bed. [SpongeBob gets out of bed] ;s1e9_49 SpongeBob; [through walkie-talkie] Okay, now what, Patrick? ;s1e9_50 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Go to your closet for a surprise. [SpongeBob slides down a room and stands up in front of his closet door] ;s1e9_51 SpongeBob; [through walkie-talkie] Okay, I'm at the closet. ;s1e9_52 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Listen carefully. What's pink and square at the same time? ;s1e9_53 SpongeBob; [through walkie-talkie] I don't know, Patrick. [opens the closet door, revealing Patrick wearing SpongeBob's clothes] ;s1e9_54 Patrick; Patrick SquarePants! ;s1e9_55 SpongeBob; [deadpan] Pat, don't do that. [sits in a chair] I've got too much to worry about. ;s1e9_56 Patrick; What's the problem? ;s1e9_57 SpongeBob; I can't pass my boating exam. I've taken it 37... ;s1e9_58 Gary;Meow.;s1e9_59 SpongeBob; ...uhh, 38 times. I know all the answers... [Patrick's square pants rip off] ...until I get behind the wheel. I just need something to help me think straight. ;s1e9_60 Patrick; Thinking straight is what I do. You drive and I'll do all the thinking for you. [takes SpongeBob's walkie-talkie] ;s1e9_61 SpongeBob; How are we going to do that? [Patrick puts a walkie-talkie into SpongeBob's head with the antenna coming out of the top] ;s1e9_62 Patrick; Come in, SpongeBob. Hello? Hello? ;s1e9_63 SpongeBob; Hey! I can hear you in my head! This is great! While I'm taking the test, you can give me all the answers. [notices the antenna sticking out] Wait a minute, Patrick. Won't I look silly with this antenna coming out of my head? [Patrick puts a tall hat over the antenna. Next, we see a big telescope peeking out SpongeBob's upstairs window] ;s1e9_64 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Pat to Sponge, Pat to Sponge, testing, testing. [looking through the telescope at SpongeBob] Testing, testing, testing, testing, testing, testing! [loudly] Testing! [screams] Test, test. Do you read?! ;s1e9_65 SpongeBob; Sponge to Pat, I read you loud and clear, over. ;s1e9_66 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Got your apple ready? [SpongeBob shows an apple] Lucky undergarments? Hold on. Hold on. [focuses in on the underwear with the telescope to reveal the word lucky on the top of it] Bingo! Underwear, apple, and me. You're ready to get that license. Uh-oh, here comes Mrs. Puff! Act natural. [SpongeBob jumps out of the boat, then gets on the ground on all fours and starts chewing grass.] ;s1e9_67 SpongeBob; [Moos like a cow] ;s1e9_68 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] No, no, get in the boat! [SpongeBob jumps in the boat. An ambulance arrives with its siren on and drops off Mrs. Puff] Give her the apple. [SpongeBob gives her the apple] ;s1e9_69 SpongeBob; Here you go, ma'am. [Mrs. Puff throws apple in her mouth and swallows] ;s1e9_70 Mrs. Puff ; Let's get this over with. [takes a deep breath] What's the first thing you do? [puts hands and arms over head for protection] ;s1e9_71 SpongeBob; [starts to get scared] Uhh... ;s1e9_72 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Start the boat. [SpongeBob starts the boat. The engine starting up causes Mrs. Puff to go crazy] ;s1e9_73 SpongeBob; Mrs. Puff. Mrs. Puff! ;s1e9_74 Mrs. Puff ; Whoa-ho! Huh? What? ;s1e9_75 SpongeBob; It's okay, it's only the boat. ;s1e9_76 Mrs. Puff ; The boat? You started the boat? ;s1e9_77 SpongeBob; I... I think so. ;s1e9_78 Mrs. Puff ; Oh. Well... what's the second thing you do? ;s1e9_79 SpongeBob;1924?;s1e9_80 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] No, no, put it in drive. ;s1e9_81 SpongeBob; Put it in drive? ;s1e9_82 Mrs. Puff ; Yes, yes, yes! [SpongeBob pushes lever down to drive] Put it in drive. Then what? ;s1e9_83 SpongeBob; [lifts leg up] Floor it? ;s1e9_84 Mrs. Puff ; No! [screams] No! ;s1e9_85 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Freeze, mister! [SpongeBob stops] Big toe. [SpongeBob's big toe pops out of his shoe and gently pushes the accelerator down] ;s1e9_86 Mrs. Puff ; Oh, gracious. Oh, gracious! Oh-oh. Ha-ha! Ah, we haven't crashed yet. ;s1e9_87 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Okay, you're coming to your first turn. [a giant wall with the word wall on it is shown and a left curve] ;s1e9_88 Mrs. Puff ; Oh no, the first turn. Please, tell me you know what to do at the first turn! ;s1e9_89 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Left. [SpongeBob turns left] ;s1e9_90 Mrs. Puff ;Oh!;s1e9_91 Patrick; [through walkie-talkie] Right. [SpongeBob turns right] ;s1e9_92 Mrs. Puff ; Oh! My, this is splendid, SpongeBob. You're doing fine. ;s1e9_93 Montage; [SpongeBob stops at a stop sign and looks both ways before starting to drive again. Then drives around with his left arm out making a signal. Patrick still talking to SpongeBob through the walkie-talkie as SpongeBob drives over a big hill in the road. As Mrs. Puff writes a couple things on her clipboard, Patrick is putting on another pair of SquarePants. SpongeBob pulls back on the boat and the boat jumps in the air over a big anchor. Patrick finds SpongeBob's diary and begins to read and laugh at it as SpongeBob jumps off a ramp through a ring of fire. Fred is walking across the course but SpongeBob stops the boat and helps him walk across. He gets back in the boat as Patrick is eating out of SpongeBob's fridge. SpongeBob is sitting back and driving with his feet and driving upside down.] ;s1e9_94 Mrs. Puff ; Splendid! Wonderful! [sign that reads finish line is just ahead] There's the finish line. It's unbelievable. You've shown the most spectacular improvement of any student I've ever seen. What's your secret? A little radio in your head? [everyone laughs] Oh, and under that hat is some kind of, uhh, antenna? [everyone laughs again] And some guy miles away from here is giving you all the answers? [everyone laughs a third time] Oh, yes, but that would be cheating. ;s1e9_95 {system}; [SpongeBob opens his eyes wide realizing he is cheating only Patrick laughs] ;s1e9_96 Patrick; Cheating! [laughing hysterically] ;s1e9_97 SpongeBob; I'm cheating?! Mrs. Puff! ;s1e9_98 Mrs. Puff ; Yes, my star pupil? ;s1e9_99 SpongeBob; I think I'm cheating. ;s1e9_100 Mrs. Puff ; What's that, dear? [SpongeBob takes a hold of Mrs. Puff] ;s1e9_101 SpongeBob; I think I am cheating! ;s1e9_102 Mrs. Puff ; You've... you've let go of the wheel. ;s1e9_103 SpongeBob; I do have an antenna under my hat! [shows the antenna under his hat] There is a guy giving me all the answers! It's all true! [crying] I'm cheating! I'm cheating! I'm cheating! ;s1e9_104 Patrick; What?! [runs out of SpongeBob's house and back under his rock, crying] ;s1e9_105 SpongeBob; I'm sorry, Mrs. Puff! I'm sorry! ;s1e9_106 Mrs. Puff ; [panicking] The wheel, SpongeBob! The wheel... ;s1e9_107 SpongeBob; Cheating... I'm a cheater! Cheater... ;s1e9_108 Mrs. Puff ; No, no, no! It's quite alright! You can cheat that way! ;s1e9_109 SpongeBob; No... I'm cheating...! ;s1e9_110 Mrs. Puff ; At least, SpongeBob... ;s1e9_111 SpongeBob; I'm cheating! ;s1e9_112 Mrs. Puff ; Cheat that way! That way! ;s1e9_113 SpongeBob; I'm a cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater! ;s1e9_114 Mrs. Puff ; It's okay to cheat today! ;s1e9_115 SpongeBob;No...!;s1e9_116 Mrs. Puff ; That way! That way! Cheat that way! ;s1e9_117 SpongeBob; Cheater...! [crashes offscreen head-on into the same lighthouse. Mrs. Puff inflates with a look of despair. The lighthouse falls yet again] ;s1e9_118 Mrs. Puff ; [deep voice] Oh, SpongeBob, why? ;s1e9_119 SpongeBob; Mrs. Puff, I think I cheated. ;s1e9_120 Fred; My leg! [some time later, EMTs are wheeling a still-inflated Mrs. Puff away on a gurney] ;s1e9_121 SpongeBob; Uhh, I'm sorry for letting you down again, Mrs. Puff. ;s1e9_122 Mrs. Puff ; [normal voice] It's okay, SpongeBob, you didn't mean it. Okay, boys, take me away. [EMTs shove Mrs. Puff into the ambulance] ;s1e9_123 SpongeBob; Don't worry, Mrs. Puff. I'll try harder next semester. [Mrs. Puff cries as she is taken away by the ambulance] It'll be great! [walks away] Only now I don't even have my bike. ;s1e9_124 Gary; [with SpongeBob's unicycle] Meow. ;s1e9_125 SpongeBob; Gary! My bike! You found it! This sponge is still mobile! [rides away on his bike with Gary on his head] Alright, let's go surprise someone at the hospital! ;s1e9_126 {system}; [The episode begins at the Krusty Krab with SpongeBob cleaning a table.] ;s1e10_1 Squidward; Hurry up with those chairs, SpongeBob. It's after closing and I'd like to go home! ;s1e10_2 {system}; [phone rings] ;s1e10_3 SpongeBob; I got it, I got it! Coming. [leaps for the phone, but Squidward answers it first. SpongeBob falls to the floor and exclaims] ;s1e10_4 Squidward; Hello? Sorry, sir, we're closed... [Mr. Krabs snatches phone] ;s1e10_5 Mr. Krabs ; Ahoy, there, Krusty Krab. How could I help you? [customer explains order over phone] Pizza? Mmm? [eyes turn into dollar signs] Of course we have pizza. ;s1e10_6 Squidward; Uh, Mr. Krabs... ;s1e10_7 Mr. Krabs ; Our delivery squid will bring it right over. [hangs up] ;s1e10_8 Squidward; But Mr. Krabs, we don't serve pizzas. [Mr. Krabs gets a plate of Krabby Patties and smashes them into a pizza. Then he puts it in a box] We don't deliver. ;s1e10_9 Mr. Krabs ; We don't deliver, [gives Squidward the pizza] but you do. ;s1e10_10 Squidward; Can't you just get SpongeBob to do it? ;s1e10_11 Mr. Krabs ; Great idea! Take him with you. [SpongeBob sneaks over smiling big] ;s1e10_12 Squidward; That's not what I had in mind! ;s1e10_13 SpongeBob;" Front end... check. Antenna... [touches the boat antenna making it vibrate] check. Bumper... check. Bumper sticker... [bumper sticker says ""I Brake For Sea Urchins""] ...check. [uncaps the tire pressure and puts his mouth in it, causing him to inflate like a balloon, and talk in a squeaky, high pitched voice while he is now the size of a giant parade balloon] Tire pressure! [blows out the rest of the pressure in Squidward's face, returning him to his normal size and voice] ...check. Vehicle inspection complete! We're really making history here, Squidward. That lucky customer is going to get the first Krabby Patty Pizza ever! ";s1e10_14 Squidward; Good, then you drive. [tosses his hat away] ;s1e10_15 SpongeBob; I can't. I'm still in Boating School. ;s1e10_16 Squidward; Come on, SpongeBob. It's just around the corner. ;s1e10_17 SpongeBob; Well, yeah, but... ;s1e10_18 Squidward; Just do what you do in school. ;s1e10_19 SpongeBob; Well, okay. Wait, don't tell me. ;s1e10_20 Squidward; Back it up. ;s1e10_21 SpongeBob;Huh?;s1e10_22 Squidward; Back... it up. ;s1e10_23 SpongeBob; Right, back... it up. [tries to move the stick shift down] ;s1e10_24 Squidward; Back it up! ;s1e10_25 SpongeBob; Okay, okay! ;s1e10_26 Squidward; Shift into reverse, SpongeBob! ;s1e10_27 SpongeBob;" Reverse? Oh, yeah, reverse. [SpongeBob imagines the words ""FORWARD"" and ""REVERSE"" turning into Korean characters ";s1e10_28 Squidward; Back it up! ;s1e10_29 SpongeBob; [shifts gears] Backing up! Backing up! [boat backs up really fast] ;s1e10_30 Squidward; [tries to get the wheel] Gimme the wheel, SpongeBob. Give me the wheel! ;s1e10_31 SpongeBob; Backing up! Backing up! Ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ack-i-i-i-i-i-ng up! [They go over a bumpy area with rocks and then they spin around and around and around, screaming. The next morning, the boat goes over five hills] Backing up. Backing up. Backing up. [boat stops with no fuel left] Backing up. ;s1e10_32 Squidward; Well... you backed up. And you know what? I think we're out of gas. And you know what else? [echoing] We're in the middle of nowhere! ;s1e10_33 SpongeBob; And you know what else else? I think the pizza's getting cold. ;s1e10_34 Squidward; [startled] And the pizza's cold? Oh, the pizza's cold. Not the pizza! Oh, how could this get any worse?! [kicks boat and the boat's gasoline becomes full again and it drives away into the distance without them] ;s1e10_35 SpongeBob; Well, we can still deliver it on foot. ;s1e10_36 {system}; [Squidward narrows his eyes. Later, both walk on the sand] ;s1e10_37 Squidward; Ow, ow, ow. ;s1e10_38 SpongeBob; [singing] The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza... ;s1e10_39 Squidward; And my feet are killing me. Whoa! [trips over SpongeBob, who is lying on the ground] SpongeBob? What are you doing? ;s1e10_40 SpongeBob; [rubbing the ground] It's an old pioneer trick. I saw it in a movie once. ;s1e10_41 Squidward; SpongeBob, this is no time for... ;s1e10_42 SpongeBob; Shh, shh, shh. It's working. ;s1e10_43 Squidward; What is it? ;s1e10_44 SwordfishTrucker; Thrashin' frashin' break dancers! [honks his truck horn] ;s1e10_45 Squidward; He's stopping! He's stopping! [Squidward realizes he's not stopping and grabs SpongeBob out of the way where they are covered in sand thanks to the truck. Squidward narrows his eyes at the smiling SpongeBob] ;s1e10_46 SpongeBob; [SpongeBob and Squidward are now in a place with heavy winds] The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me. The Krusty Krab pizza... [the wind blows on Squidward's nose making it touch his face so he puts it down, only for it to touch his face again so he puts it in his mouth] ...is the pizza free delivery. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza very ta-asty. [SpongeBob gets carried around in the air by the huge winds] Whoa! ;s1e10_47 Squidward; Will you let go of that stupid pizza, already?! ;s1e10_48 SpongeBob; [still being carried around in the air] I can't, it's for the customer! ;s1e10_49 Squidward; Who cares about the customer?! ;s1e10_50 SpongeBob; I do! ;s1e10_51 Squidward; Well, I don't! ;s1e10_52 SpongeBob; [wind stops and SpongeBob gasps] Squidward! [starts flying again] ;s1e10_53 Squidward; Let go of that pizza! ;s1e10_54 SpongeBob; No! [runs over Squidward] ;s1e10_55 Squidward; Ow! [holding SpongeBob's legs] SpongeBob, let go of that pizza! ;s1e10_56 SpongeBob; No! It's for the customer! ;s1e10_57 Squidward; SpongeBob! [they catch sight of a tornado nearby] Let go of the pizza! [gets lifted up into the tornado] ;s1e10_58 SpongeBob;No!;s1e10_59 Squidward; SpongeBob! [looks down and screams] Hang onto the pizza! [tornado spits them both out. SpongeBob uses the pizza as a parachute but Squidward falls hard onto the ground] Hey! Hey! [crawls up to the screen] Where's the road? Where's the road? [a tumbleweed rolls by] We're doomed! How are we gonna get home, which way do we go? [SpongeBob lands] What are we gonna do now? There's no road here! ;s1e10_60 SpongeBob; I think town's this way. [points] ;s1e10_61 Squidward; Oh, don't tell me, Jethro. The pioneers? ;s1e10_62 SpongeBob; That's right. [points to a mossy rock] Moss always points to civilization. ;s1e10_63 Squidward; That way? That way there? [SpongeBob nods] So, let me get this straight... you think that we should go that way? ;s1e10_64 SpongeBob; [nods again] Yep. ;s1e10_65 Squidward; Well, then I'm going this way. [heads the other way] ;s1e10_66 SpongeBob; Huh? Squid, wait! I don't think... ;s1e10_67 Squidward; Trust me, I know where I'm going. [Pans out to show another city in the other direction] ;s1e10_68 SpongeBob; [sings] The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza, absolutivally. [later] pizza... [starts beatboxing] pizza... [later, SpongeBob is walking backwards. SpongeBob's pants almost split into two and move up and down simultaneously while he continues to beatbox. Later, SpongeBob sings with blues-rock soul] Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza, yeah, for you and [falsetto] me! [Later, SpongeBob and Squidward are weary looking and the former sings exhaustingly] Krab Pizza... for you. Krus... the Krusshy and the... Krab... pizza... [Later, they are both lying face down in the sand] ;s1e10_69 Squidward; Sponge, we gotta eat something. ;s1e10_70 SpongeBob; I heard in times of hardship, the pioneers would eat coral. ;s1e10_71 {system}; [Squidward eats some coral] ;s1e10_72 SpongeBob; No, maybe it wasn't coral. ;s1e10_73 {system}; [Squidward spits out the coral] ;s1e10_74 SpongeBob; Maybe it was sand, no, no, mud. ;s1e10_75 Squidward; Give me the pizza! ;s1e10_76 SpongeBob; Wait, I remember now. It was coral! ;s1e10_77 Squidward; Give it to me! ;s1e10_78 SpongeBob; No, we promised it's for the customer. ;s1e10_79 Squidward; [fancy music plays] You're right. It's for the customer. ;s1e10_80 SpongeBob;Yeah!;s1e10_81 Squidward; Maybe we better check on it, make sure it's okay. ;s1e10_82 SpongeBob;Well?;s1e10_83 Squidward; Just a peek. [opens box] ;s1e10_84 SpongeBob; [he shuts it quickly] Okay, it's fine. ;s1e10_85 Squidward; No, I think I saw something. [opens box] Oh, no. I was wrong. It looks okay. Sure is a fine-looking pizza. ;s1e10_86 SpongeBob; [entranced] Yeah... ;s1e10_87 Squidward; What's that? Is that the cheese? ;s1e10_88 SpongeBob;Yeah...;s1e10_89 Squidward; And the pepperoni? ;s1e10_90 SpongeBob;Yeah...;s1e10_91 Squidward; [SpongeBob slurps] Oh, looks good, huh? ;s1e10_92 SpongeBob; [snaps out of it] Wait a second, I know what you're trying to do, Squidward! [closes box] I'm not letting you eat the pizza! ;s1e10_93 Squidward; Give me the pizza! ;s1e10_94 SpongeBob;No!;s1e10_95 Squidward; Don't make me take it away from you, SpongeBob! ;s1e10_96 SpongeBob; Get away! [runs off] ;s1e10_97 Squidward; [chases SpongeBob] Get back here, SpongeBob, give me the pizza! ;s1e10_98 SpongeBob;No!;s1e10_99 Squidward;SpongeBob!;s1e10_100 SpongeBob;No!;s1e10_101 Squidward;SpongeBob!;s1e10_102 SpongeBob;No!;s1e10_103 Squidward; Wait! [he becomes too tired to run] ;s1e10_104 SpongeBob; No! No! [runs into Squidward] ;s1e10_105 Squidward; I want that pizza and you're gonna hand it over one way or another! ;s1e10_106 SpongeBob; Look, we're saved! ;s1e10_107 Squidward; Sure, we're saved. Now give me some pizza! ;s1e10_108 SpongeBob; No, really, Squid, we're saved! We're saved! We're saved! [he jumps in and out of his pants] ;s1e10_109 Squidward; Will you cut that out?! ;s1e10_110 SpongeBob; [to a conga beat, doing a backflip and some push-ups] Saved, saved, saved, saved! [rips himself apart then the two parts go in circles and then they connect again] Saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! [SpongeBob starts doing a conga dance] Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! Yes, we are saved! ;s1e10_111 Squidward; That's just a stupid boulder! ;s1e10_112 SpongeBob; It's not just a boulder. [sniff] It's a rock. [cries and hugs the boulder] A rock! A rock! It's a big beautiful, old rock. [climbs up it and rubs it] Oh, the pioneers used to ride these babies for miles, and it's in great shape. ;s1e10_113 Squidward; SpongeBob, will you forget the stupid pioneers?! Have you ever noticed that there are none of them left? That's because they were lousy hitchhikers, ate coral and took directions from algae! And now, you're telling me they thought they could drive... [SpongeBob runs over Squidward with the boulder] ...rocks? Hold on there, Jethro! ;s1e10_114 SpongeBob; [they stop outside the customer's house] I can't wait to see the look on our customer?s face! [rings doorbell] ;s1e10_115 Customer;Yeah?;s1e10_116 SpongeBob; Congratulations, sir. Your Krabby Patty pizza is here! ;s1e10_117 Customer; Wow, thanks! I've been dying for one of these. It... [he frowns, brief pause] Where's my drink? ;s1e10_118 SpongeBob; [confused] What drink? ;s1e10_119 Customer; [in an angry tone] My drink? My diet Dr. Kelp? Don't tell me you forgot my drink! ;s1e10_120 SpongeBob; [checks through the order, and sees no drink listed.] But, you didn't order any... ;s1e10_121 Customer; [yelling furiously] How am I supposed to eat this pizza without my drink?! ;s1e10_122 SpongeBob; But... but... [tears start rolling down his face] ;s1e10_123 Customer; Didn't you ever once think of the customer?! [throws the pizza box at SpongeBob's face] You call yourself a delivery boy? Well, I ain't buyin'! [slams the door. SpongeBob goes over to Squidward, smiling and trying not to cry] ;s1e10_124 Squidward; Sponge? Sponge? It's okay. Sponge? [SpongeBob drops the pizza, falls over, starts sobbing, and absorbs his tears over and over] Sponge? [SpongeBob continues crying. Squidward becomes furious. He grabs the pizza, stomps towards the customer's house and pounds on the door] ;s1e10_125 Customer; [answers the door, still angry] Another one? Look, I told your little friend I ain't payin' for that! ;s1e10_126 Squidward; [Customer's point of view] Well, this one's on the house! [brutally slams the pizza box in the customer's face] ;s1e10_127 SpongeBob; [still crying] Did he change his mind? ;s1e10_128 Squidward; [smugly] He sure did. Ate the whole thing in one bite. ;s1e10_129 SpongeBob; [stops crying] No drink? ;s1e10_130 Squidward; Nah. Now take me home. [jumps up on the rock] ;s1e10_131 SpongeBob; Are you kidding? We have just enough time to make it back to work! [backs up the rock where they are instantly at the Krusty Krab] ;s1e10_132 Squidward; Huh? [screen cuts to black] Oh, my aching tentacles! ;s1e10_133 Nematodes;" Walking, walking, walking, walking. [continue to repeat ""walking""] ";s1e11_1 NematodeOne;Hungry!;s1e11_2 Nematodes;" Hungry, hungry, hungry, hungry. [continue to repeat ""hungry."" All eat a whole large piece of coral] ";s1e11_3 NematodeOne; Still hungry! ;s1e11_4 Nematodes;" Still hungry, still hungry, still hungry, still hungry. [continue to repeat ""still hungry."" All eat a truck that drives by, leaving the driver floating] ";s1e11_5 Fred; Aw, dang nematodes! ;s1e11_6 NematodeOne;Thirsty!;s1e11_7 Nematodes;" Thirsty, thirsty, thirsty, thirsty. [continue to repeat ""thirsty."" They all bounce to SpongeBob's house and take out some straws. Then start drinking up the pineapple house. SpongeBob and Gary are still sleeping as various items in the bedroom shrink out of existence, including Gary's food bowl] ";s1e11_8 Gary; Meow. [The rest of the room begins to shrink as SpongeBob wakes up] ;s1e11_9 SpongeBob; Hooray, Gary! We're finally huge! [The room shrinks again, and the bed disappears, leaving SpongeBob on the floor] ;s1e11_10 Gary;Meow.;s1e11_11 SpongeBob; Huh? Wait a minute. [cut to the outside, where the nematodes are still drinking the pineapple] Oh no! [SpongeBob runs into the living room. He squeezes through the door and gets launched into the wall. Gary gets stuck in the door as he slithers in] ;s1e11_12 Gary;Meow!;s1e11_13 SpongeBob; [He crashes into the wall, flipping the side table over. The phone lands on his lap] Ow. Shell phone! I know. [while quickly dialing] I'll call Squidward. He'll know what to do. ;s1e11_14 Squidward; [on the other line] Hello? ;s1e11_15 SpongeBob;Squidward!;s1e11_16 Squidward; Is it time already for you to ruin my day? ;s1e11_17 SpongeBob; Squidward! Help me! [SpongeBob's phone starts shrinking as he tries to explain what's going on] My house is shrinking, I woke up this morning and it was getting smaller and [cut back to Squidward in his bed. SpongeBob's voice sounds fast and high-pitched as a result of his phone shrinking] smaller and the walls are closing in on me, Squidward, Gary is terrified too! [SpongeBob's phone disappears, and the phone call is disconnected] Oh no! ;s1e11_18 Squidward; Yep, it is. [SpongeBob screams] ;s1e11_19 Patrick; [comes out from his rock] Is it time already to ruin Squid's day? [peels off his rock and falls on his furniture, then jumps out with a tuxedo and top hat on] Hey, SpongeBob, don't start without me! ;s1e11_20 Nematodes; [continue sucking on SpongeBob's house, then they all burp and leave] ;s1e11_21 SpongeBob; Ohh... nematodes. [sees a seed on the ground, then picks it up] The only thing left of my house is this little pebble. [Patrick and Squidward walk up] ;s1e11_22 Squidward; What's going on here? ;s1e11_23 SpongeBob; I've got bad news, guys! Look at what happened to my house! It's gone! [sadly] It's all gone. What am I going to do? Where am I going to live? ;s1e11_24 Squidward; [smiling] Yeah... ;s1e11_25 Patrick; [his eyes bulge excessively in surprise] Hey, SpongeBob, your house is gone! ;s1e11_26 Squidward; Well, what can I say? [begins to shake SpongeBob's hand] It's been great knowing you, SpongeBob. Good luck, somewhere else. [walks back to his house as he continues talking sarcastically] I'm gonna miss you. Boo-hoo. Boo-hoo. [party favors fly out Squidward's windows as he celebrates] Boo-hoo! [starts to laugh] ;s1e11_27 Patrick; Squid's taking it real hard. What are you gonna do now? ;s1e11_28 SpongeBob; I guess I'll have to move back with my mom and dad. [shown a picture of SpongeBob's parents smiling] ;s1e11_29 Patrick; No, wait a minute, no you don't. [shown picture of SpongeBob's parents frowning] We can build you a new house! ;s1e11_30 SpongeBob; We can't build a house! ;s1e11_31 Patrick; Well, sure, it's easy! I built my house all by myself! [the antenna on Patrick's rock falls off] ;s1e11_32 SpongeBob; Alright, Patrick, lets get to work! [zoom in on SpongeBob and Patrick as construction workers] ;s1e11_33 Patrick;" [Patrick tries to hit a nail into a board, but hits his hand instead] Ow! Ow! Ow! [SpongeBob takes two buckets of paint, one red and one green. He pours the red paint on his backside and pours the green paint on his front side. He puts one side on a fence so that the paint gets on it, and then he does the other side the same way. He does this twice. As he tightens a loose bolt, the screen turns every time SpongeBob tightens the bolt sending Patrick sliding, falling upside down towards the sky, then back onto the ground right side up. SpongeBob nails pieces of wooden boards together in midair, and a piece falls off and lands on Patrick's hand, leading him to say ""Ow!"" each time. Patrick moves his board under the next board, which falls down on his hand. This happens several times. Next, shown SpongeBob's finished house, shown also with sparkles] ";s1e11_34 Patrick; [Patrick gives a big thumbs up with bandages wrapped around his thumb] We're done! ;s1e11_35 SpongeBob; Yeah! So what do you think? ;s1e11_36 Patrick; [SpongeBob's built house sparkles a bit] I wish I lived there. ;s1e11_37 SpongeBob;Really?;s1e11_38 Patrick; No. [SpongeBob puts the small pineapple on his head] ;s1e11_39 SpongeBob; One bedroom. [nose sticks out through the door and the pineapple breaks into pieces] ;s1e11_40 Patrick; Tartar sauce. ;s1e11_41 SpongeBob; [pets Gary] Well, looks like we've got to move back with Mom and Pop. ;s1e11_42 Patrick; Well, you can't move back in with your parents! When my parents kicked me out of the house, I never went back. Wait! You and Gary can come stay with me! ;s1e11_43 SpongeBob; That'd be great! ;s1e11_44 SpongeBob; Good night, rockmate. ;s1e11_45 Gary;Meow.;s1e11_46 SpongeBob; Good night, Gary. [SpongeBob goes to sleep but then is awaken to Patrick's snoring] Oh...what the...? [Gary hides in his shell and SpongeBob puts a cork in each side of his head, and goes back to sleep. The wind blows and Patrick shivers, he then pulls the rock closer to him, SpongeBob shivers in the cold and pulls it back over himself. Gary sits on top of the rock as they keep pulling it back and forth until Patrick keeps the rock closer to him. SpongeBob gets cold and he covers himself with sand on and goes to sleep. Patrick starts drooling heavily, filling his mouth, and flows like a stream over to SpongeBob. As SpongeBob snores, he absorbs the drool coming from Patrick and becomes a fat sponge. He waddles over to Patrick and removes the corks, spilling Patrick's drool out of him and down-sizing him to normal size. Then he takes out a bigger cork and puts it in Patrick's mouth and goes back to sleep. Patrick struggles, then spits out the cork] ;s1e11_47 Patrick; [lifts rock and starts smashing SpongeBob with it in his sleep several times when the spiders don't wanna get them] Oh! Spiders! Spiders! Get 'em off me! Get 'em off me! Get 'em off! Get 'em off, off me! Off, off, off! [he then goes back to sleep] ;s1e11_48 SpongeBob; No, Patrick! No, Patrick! No, wake up! No, wake up! No, it's me! I'm SpongeBob! [moves out of the rock and away from it a few feet and goes back to sleep but then wakes up] ;s1e11_49 Patrick; Spiders! Spiders! [picks up his rock, runs over to SpongeBob, and smashes him repeatedly with the rock, the spiders can't get him again] Spiders! Get 'em off me! Get 'em off me! ;s1e11_50 SpongeBob; Ow, ow, ow, oh, oh, ow, ow, ow, ow! [Patrick goes back to sleep] ;s1e11_51 SpongeBob; [shivers, in Squidward's house, he stands next to Squidward, holding Gary, as Squidward sleeps, he taps Squidward's nose as he whispers] Squidward? Squidward? ;s1e11_52 Squidward; [sleepily] H-h-huh? ;s1e11_53 SpongeBob;Squidward?;s1e11_54 Squidward; [sleepily] Whoa. Huh? Wha-what? ;s1e11_55 SpongeBob; Squidward, could we stay here a couple of days or a month or two? ;s1e11_56 Squidward; [sleepily] Uh, yeah, wha-wha-whatever. ;s1e11_57 SpongeBob; Thanks. Thanks, Squidward. [gets in bed with Squidward] Squidward, could you scoot over a little? ;s1e11_58 Squidward; [sleepily] Uh, oh, yeah, sure. [scoots over to the side] ;s1e11_59 SpongeBob; While you're at it, could you get me a glass of water? ;s1e11_60 Squidward; [sleepily] Okay. Hmmm, yeah, sure. [Sleepily talks a bit, gets out of bed and walks off, then comes back with a glass of water] ;s1e11_61 SpongeBob; Yeah, this is a real swell place you got here. [Squidward hands SpongeBob the glass] Thanks, buddy. ;s1e11_62 Squidward; [sleepily] Uh-huh. Y-you're welcome. [SpongeBob drinks the water] ;s1e11_63 SpongeBob; Yeah, I like sleepovers. ;s1e11_64 Squidward; [sleepily] Yeah. Me, too. ;s1e11_65 SpongeBob; Yep, this is great. Good night, Squidward. ;s1e11_66 Squidward; [yawns] Good night, SpongeBob. [Squidward's eyes pop open. Squidward opens the door and SpongeBob and Gary walk out] [unhappy] Good night, SpongeBob. [night turns to day then rooster crows to wake everyone up. Squidward opens his eyes excitedly] Tum-ta-dum! Today's the big day, Squidward! Don't wanna be late! [he flies into his closet, gets dressed, and goes outside] Gotta hurry! Hold it! Hold everything! [SpongeBob and Patrick stand outside, with bags] I would not want to miss this. The day SpongeBob moves! I can't believe it's really happening. ;s1e11_67 SpongeBob; Don't worry, Squidward. I'll come visit you. ;s1e11_68 Squidward; Don't try to cheer me up, SpongeBob. [changes his smile to a frown briefly] Please. ;s1e11_69 SpongeBob; Here come my parents. [Patrick beings to cry and the car horn sounds as SpongeBob's parents drive up] ;s1e11_70 Mrs. SquarePants ; SpongeBob! Hi, honey, we're here! ;s1e11_71 Mr. SquarePants ; Come on, SpongeBob, hurry, hurry, son, your mother has dinner waiting. ;s1e11_72 SpongeBob; Hi, Mom. ;s1e11_73 Squidward; Hello, Mrs. SquarePants! Let me help you with these bags. [picks up the bags and carries them to the car] ;s1e11_74 SpongeBob; Just give me a minute. [walks back to where his house used to be] I cannot hold onto you any longer, little pebble. [buries it into the ground in the middle of where his house used to be] You hold too many memories. [as he starts to cry, a tear falls from his nose and into the ground where the seed absorbs it, it then starts to glow. Then SpongeBob shakes Squidward's hand] Well, Squidward, this is goodbye. [walks away] ;s1e11_75 Squidward; Goodbye, SpongeBob, goodbye. [dances] Goodbye, SpongeBob. Bye-bye-bye. Goodbye, SpongeBob. Ha-ha. Goodbye, goodbye. [Patrick lies on the ground, bawling, as SpongeBob gets in the car] ;s1e11_76 Mrs. SquarePants ; Come on, SpongeBob. ;s1e11_77 SpongeBob; Goodbye, Patrick. Goodbye, Bikini Bottom. [Patrick holds onto the back of the boat, lifting the front into the air, as he cries] ;s1e11_78 Squidward; [still dancing] SpongeBob is leaving. He's leaving, he's leaving! [the seed shakes violently] La, la, la, la, la, la, la ha ha ha ha! [the seed shakes even more violently] He leaving, ha ha! [seed still shakes, then it sprouts three roots] SpongeBob is leaving, he's leaving! [Suddenly, the ground starts shaking. Squidward stops dancing, while SpongeBob, his parents and Patrick stare, bemused. A giant green stem grows out of the ground, SpongeBob's house grows from the plant and drops where his old house used to be and on Squidward. The stem then goes back into the ground] ;s1e11_79 SpongeBob; My house is back! [SpongeBob, his parents, and Patrick all happily run into the pineapple] Aww! Good old pineapple! It was exactly where it used to be! [continues praising all of the returned belongings he possessed in his original house. SpongeBob returns to Squidward lying under the floor] Aww, Squidward, isn't this great? I'm back forever! ;s1e11_80 Squidward; [muffled] Forever? ;s1e11_81 {system}; [The episode starts with young adult Mermaid Man flying through the water.] ;s1e12_1 TVAnnouncer; MermaidMan: Fleet and forceful. With the ability to assemble and charge the creatures of the deep. [as he speaks, a hammerhead shark attempts to eat two groups of fish but to no luck] ;s1e12_2 MermaidMan; By the power of Neptune! ;s1e12_3 TVAnnouncer; [as he speaks, young adult Barnacle Boy joins Mermaid Man] Mermaid Man, with his young associate Barnacle Boy, fights for all creatures who live in the sea, against the forces of evil. ;s1e12_4 {system}; [As the TV Announcer speaks, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy strike their rings they each hold on their right hands. They create a whirlpool aimed at Clam Head Candy Cad. A baby is crying at her highchair.] ;s1e12_5 ClamHeadCandyCad; [holds a baby's lollipop and spots the whirlpool] Oh, no! The Raging Whirlpool! [the whirlpool catches him and the lollipop falls on the baby's tongue] ;s1e12_6 TVAnnouncer; Mermaid Man! Champion of the deep. ;s1e12_7 {system};" [Mermaid Man throws a water ball at the screen, revealing the production logo ""MermaidMan & BarnacleBoy""] ";s1e12_8 {system}; [both watching the TV, excitedly] Yay! Champion of the deep! Woo! ;s1e12_9 SpongeBob; [dressed up as Mermaid Man] Come on, Barnacle Boy. There's evil afoot. ;s1e12_10 Patrick; [dressed up as Barnacle Boy] Leaping lampreys, Mermaid Man! I'm right behind you! ;s1e12_11 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick come outside and sneak behind Squidward, who's relaxing on a lounge chair wearing sunglasses.] ;s1e12_12 SpongeBob; Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy spotted their arch enemy, Reflecto, up to no good. ;s1e12_13 Squidward;SpongeBob.;s1e12_14 SpongeBob; You know what this means. [pulls out a box of donuts] ;s1e12_15 Patrick;Donuts.;s1e12_16 SpongeBob; By the power of Neptune. ;s1e12_17 {system}; [Patrick bites into his donut] ;s1e12_18 SpongeBob; Creatures of the deep, assemble! [both go into deep thinking] Think... harder... Barnacle Boy. [a jellyfish swims by] Here they come. ;s1e12_19 {system}; [Squidward blows the jellyfish away] ;s1e12_20 SpongeBob; Blast, Reflecto has become too powerful. ;s1e12_21 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick set up a tent over Squidward] ;s1e12_22 Squidward; What the? [groans angrily] ;s1e12_23 SpongeBob; If Reflecto is cut off from sunlight, he becomes weak. ;s1e12_24 Patrick; Jumping jellyfish, Mermaid Man. He's destroying the shield! ;s1e12_25 {system}; [Cut to Squidward destroying the tent in a fury] ;s1e12_26 SpongeBob; [gasps] Quick, Barnacle Boy, back to the sea cave. ;s1e12_27 Patrick; Right, Mermaid Man. ;s1e12_28 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick run back to the Pineapple, closing the door behind them.] ;s1e12_29 Squidward;SpongeBob!;s1e12_30 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick run to the door and knocks it hard] ;s1e12_31 Squidward; SpongeBob, open up! [Squidward continues knocking the door] ;s1e12_32 SpongeBob; Reflecto has found our secret lab. ;s1e12_33 Patrick; What would the real Mermaid Man do? ;s1e12_34 Squidward; Why don't you go ask him yourself? ;s1e12_35 SpongeBob; Elaborate, you vile fiend. ;s1e12_36 Squidward; He and Barnacle Boy live in the retirement home on the other side of town. ;s1e12_37 SpongeBob; Hmm, they must be working undercover. ;s1e12_38 Squidward; Yeah... now please leave me alone. [walks away] ;s1e12_39 {system}; [Patrick bites into the donut again] Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, reunite! ;s1e12_40 {system}; [Cuts to Shady Shoals Retirement Home, where SpongeBob and Patrick approach the manager] ;s1e12_41 SpongeBob; Excuse me, I know that Mermaid Man is working undercover on an important case, but you think we can see him? ;s1e12_42 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick gasp] ;s1e12_43 ShadyShoalsCaretaker; [whispers] Try not to surprise them. ;s1e12_44 SpongeBob; Oh! Patrick! Can you believe it? ;s1e12_45 Patrick; [holding onto SpongeBob] Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy in the flesh! ;s1e12_46 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick walk in front of the TV that Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy are watching.] ;s1e12_47 BarnacleBoy; [pokes elbow at Mermaid Man] Hey, who are those guys? ;s1e12_48 MermaidMan; Uhh, are they here to fix the TV? ;s1e12_49 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick giggle.] ;s1e12_50 BarnacleBoy; What do you want? ;s1e12_51 SpongeBob; Are you Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy? ;s1e12_52 BarnacleBoy; Well, we used to be. But now we're retired. ;s1e12_53 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick gasp.] ;s1e12_54 SpongeBob; But you can't retire! There's evil afoot! ;s1e12_55 MermaidMan; Wha? Evil! Evil! [runs to a coral pot and starts hanging on it] Barnacle Boy! Come quick, I got the evil! ;s1e12_56 SpongeBob; All I said was there's evil afoot. ;s1e12_57 MermaidMan; Evil! Evil! E... ;s1e12_58 BarnacleBoy; Would you please stop saying that? ;s1e12_59 MermaidMan; [hanging on a water fountain. Incidental 88, who is nearby, shakes his head in disapproval] Evil! Evil, evil, evil, evil, evil! [water squirts at him] Death raaaaay! ;s1e12_60 {system}; [The caretaker comes, grabs SpongeBob and Patrick and throws them out the door.] ;s1e12_61 SpongeBob; Wow, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. ;s1e12_62 Patrick; It's too bad they're old. ;s1e12_63 SpongeBob; What do you mean, Patrick? Old people are the greatest. They're full of wisdom and experience. [real life captain gives a thumbs up and triumphant music plays] The world needs Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. Someone, somewhere, is in trouble, and I won't rest until Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy are out of retirement. [fireworks appear] ;s1e12_64 Patrick; Ooh! Pretty lights! ;s1e12_65 {system}; [At the Shady Shoals Rest Home cafeteria] ;s1e12_66 MermaidMan; To the meatloaf! [receives a slice of meatloaf into his bowl] To the broccoli! [receives some broccoli into his bowl. Mermaid Man looks at the orange cafeteria worker.] Make sure you give extra broccoli to my young ward. The boy needs his vitamins. ;s1e12_67 OrangeCafeteriaWorker; [gives some broccoli to Barnacle Boy's bowl] Here you go, son. Haha. ;s1e12_68 MermaidMan; To the table, away! ;s1e12_69 BarnacleBoy; Careful! D-Don't run! ;s1e12_70 {system}; [Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy take their seats. Just then, SpongeBob arrives.] ;s1e12_71 SpongeBob; Hey, Mermaid Man. [approaches Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy's table] ;s1e12_72 MermaidMan; Uh, here comes the TV repairman. ;s1e12_73 BarnacleBoy; What do you want from us? ;s1e12_74 SpongeBob; Hold on. Just let me look at ya. ;s1e12_75 MermaidMan; Stay alert, Barnacle Boy. He... he's up to something. ;s1e12_76 BarnacleBoy;" Will you cut... will you stop calling me ""boy""? ";s1e12_77 SpongeBob; Do you remember the time the food supply in Atlantis was running low? So you invented a ray gun that makes things grow six times their size to shoot at the kelp gardens. But then, [changes the shape of his head to look more rounded] the evil Man Ray swoops down and swipes the gun away and shoots all the algae! [mimes firing the gun] And he gloms onto the undersea dome! [jumps and lands mouth-first onto a table, where Incidental 88 is eating] And he starts sucking on the glass. [sucks on the table. Incidental 88 moves his oatmeal away from SpongeBob in disgust] ;s1e12_78 BarnacleBoy; What's your point, kid? ;s1e12_79 SpongeBob; You guys are the greatest heroes of all time, and I think you should come out of retirement. ;s1e12_80 MermaidMan; Listen up, you villains. I wanna eat my meatloaf. If you don't get out of here, then by the power invested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife. ;s1e12_81 ShadyShoalsCaretaker; [enters the cafeteria] What is going on in here?! ;s1e12_82 MermaidMan; [points to SpongeBob, who stops smiling] You may kiss the bride! ;s1e12_83 {system}; [SpongeBob gets kicked out and rolls home, where Patrick was waiting for him] ;s1e12_84 Patrick; Did you re-unite our heroes? ;s1e12_85 SpongeBob; No, but I'm married. ;s1e12_86 {system}; [Back at the retirement home, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy are in rocking chairs.] ;s1e12_87 MermaidMan; [moving vigorously on a rocking chair] Up, up, and away. Up, up, and away. ;s1e12_88 SpongeBob; [dressed up as a woman and speaking in a Southern accent] Oh, mah. This purse is so big and heavy. ;s1e12_89 Patrick; [dressed up as a robber] Hold it right there, ma'am. I'll be taking that. [grabs SpongeBob's purse] ;s1e12_90 SpongeBob; [screams] Hay-lp! Hay-lp! Hay-lp! ;s1e12_91 Patrick; It's working. ;s1e12_92 SpongeBob; [Barnacle Boy comes over to him] Wha, are you here to rescue little ol' me? ;s1e12_93 BarnacleBoy; [yells at SpongeBob, ruining his makeup] Pipe down! You could wake Mermaid Man and he's ornery when his nap is disturbed. ;s1e12_94 SpongeBob; [approaches Mermaid Man, who is sleeping with his eyes open] Ever alert, Mermaid Man has trained himself to sleep with his eyes open. ;s1e12_95 BarnacleBoy; Confound it, get away from him! ;s1e12_96 MermaidMan; [wakes up] Stop shoutin'! I'm nappin'! ;s1e12_97 BarnacleBoy; [close up to his face] It's not me, you old coot! ;s1e12_98 Incidental 80 ;Yes?;s1e12_99 Incidental 84 ; That's me. ;s1e12_100 Incidental 81 ; I'm over here. ;s1e12_101 {system}; [Cuts back to Mermaid Man, as he and Barnacle Boy start arguing with each other] ;s1e12_102 SpongeBob; [tugs on Mermaid Man pants] Excuse me, Mermaid Man. ;s1e12_103 MermaidMan; What do you want? ;s1e12_104 BarnacleBoy; This better be good. ;s1e12_105 SpongeBob; This'll cheer you up. We're almost done painting your invisible boatmobile. [The invisible boatmobile is shown almost completely covered in black paint and we also see Patrick smiling while holding a paintbrush with black paint on it.] ;s1e12_106 BarnacleBoy; [enraged] Gah! It's supposed to be invisible! That's it! [to Mermaid Man] We gotta end our life of leisure. It's time to come out of retirement. There's evil afoot. ;s1e12_107 MermaidMan; Evil! Where is it? ;s1e12_108 BarnacleBoy; There it is! [points at SpongeBob and Patrick] You know what this means? [opens up a box with their rings] ;s1e12_109 MermaidMan; [looking delighted] Donuts! ;s1e12_110 BarnacleBoy; Oh, brother. ;s1e12_111 {system}; [Barnacle Boy puts one of the rings on Mermaid Man and then they try to put both of the rings together, but they miss. Superhero sequence fails. Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy wave their arms around up and down to synchronize their positioning of their arms. So then they attempt to unite both of the rings together a second time. Both rings are successfully put together but the superhero sequence fails again.] ;s1e12_112 BarnacleBoy; Say the oath. ;s1e12_113 MermaidMan; [in his young voice] Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, unite! [unite sequence succeeds while their rings are united together] Throw a waterball at 'em! ;s1e12_114 Patrick;Hehehehehe.;s1e12_115 BarnacleBoy; Mumbling morays. It's not working, Mermaid Man. ;s1e12_116 MermaidMan; He-he's-he's absorbing it like some kind of evil sponge! ;s1e12_117 Patrick; It's the Raging Whirlpool. ;s1e12_118 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick cheer as the whirlpool consumes them] ;s1e12_119 MermaidMan; Those fiends. They're actually enjoying it. ;s1e12_120 {system}; [the whirlpool begins to stop, they are still excited] Do it again! Do it again! Do it again! ;s1e12_121 BarnacleBoy; Now what, Mermaid Man? We need help! ;s1e12_122 {system}; [Ultrasound waves divert to various rooms in the retirement home. One of them hit an elderly fish.] ;s1e12_123 UnknownElderlyFish; Uh, what? [walks outside] ;s1e12_124 {system}; [Various old fish are summoned from the retirement home, and they come outside slowly] ;s1e12_125 BarnacleBoy; Hmm, the creatures of the deep seem to have lost some of their luster. ;s1e12_126 MermaidMan; Sea creatures, attack! ;s1e12_127 SpongeBob; Pinch me, I must be dreaming. ;s1e12_128 {system}; [Sea creatures, now carrying torches and pitchforks, pick up SpongeBob and Patrick] ;s1e12_129 SpongeBob; Mission accomplished, Patrick! ;s1e12_130 Patrick; Yeah, we did it! ;s1e12_131 {system}; [Sea creatures throw them out] ;s1e12_132 MermaidMan; [happily] I did it. I feel five years younger. Oh, it's good to be back! ;s1e12_133 BarnacleBoy; We did it, you ol' coot. [they shake hands] ;s1e12_134 MermaidMan; Who are you? [Barnacle Boy becomes annoyed] ;s1e12_135 {system}; [At SpongeBob?s house, the TV plays the production logo for ?The New Adventures of MermaidMan & BarnacleBoy?] ;s1e12_136 TVAnnouncer; The New Adventures of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy! [Shows Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy sitting at a table on opposite sides, a checker board in the middle with checker pieces] We join our heroes locked in a battle of wits. [Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy play checkers] ;s1e12_137 {system};" [Mermaid Man places a black checker on the board. A ""Pow!"" pow-bubble appears. Barnacle Boy replies by placing a red checker on the board, shaking nearby checker pieces. ""Clack!"" appears. Mermaid Man sweats, then places a black checker to the end of the board. A ""King Me!"" appears. Suddenly the phone rings.] ";s1e12_138 MermaidMan; It's the Aquaphone! [holds the phone upside down] What is it, Chief? Uhh, hello? Hello? Hello? [hangs up the phone] ;s1e12_139 {system};" [""HANG UP!"" appears.] ";s1e12_140 MermaidMan; That phone is still broken. Remind me to g-get that fixed. [sits down] ;s1e12_141 {system};" [""SIT!"" appears.] ";s1e12_142 BarnacleBoy; Remind you of what? ;s1e12_143 MermaidMan; Remind me of what? ;s1e12_144 TVAnnouncer; Will our heroes ever get their phone fixed? Tune in next week and find out. ;s1e12_145 SpongeBob; Wow. That was even better than the old show. ;s1e12_146 Patrick; It's all thanks to you. ;s1e12_147 {system};" [SpongeBob gives the thumbs up and winks ""WINK!"" appears, and the episode ends.] ";s1e12_148 Squidward; Welcome to the Krusty Krab. My name is Squidward. May I take your order? ;s1e13_1 Incidental 31 ; Hmmm... uhh... oh, I'll have a, uh... [Squidward takes out a pencil and a paper] ...no. [Squidward puts the pencil and the paper away] Oh, maybe... [Squidward takes out the pencil and the paper again] ...no. [Squidward puts the pencil and the paper away again] Hmmm... I'll have... [Squidward takes out the pencil and the paper again] ...no. Or maybe... ;s1e13_2 Squidward; Are you planning on ordering today, sir? ;s1e13_3 Incidental 31 ; I'll have a... Krabby Patty. ;s1e13_4 Squidward; [writing down the order] How original. ;s1e13_5 Incidental 31 ; And with extra onions. ;s1e13_6 Squidward; Daring today, aren't we? [takes the order and shows it to SpongeBob] One Krabby Patty, extra onions. [SpongeBob takes the piece of paper and puts it with the rest of the orders] ;s1e13_7 SpongeBob; One cryin' Johnny comin' up! [cracks his knuckles, then adds each ingredient as mentioned] First bun, then patty, followed by ketchup, mustard, pickles, extra onions, lettuce, cheese, tomatoes, and bun, in that order. One cryin' Johnny! Up! [he rings the bell] ;s1e13_8 Squidward; Whatever. [Incidental 5 comes up and tells him what he wants and Squidward relays the order to SpongeBob] Twelve Krabby Patties on wheat buns! [SpongeBob takes a plate and patties begin to appear on the plate] ;s1e13_9 SpongeBob; [at rapid speed] Bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun, bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun, bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun, bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun, bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun, bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun, bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun, bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun, bun, patty, ketchup, tomato, bun. [at normal speed] One dozen cryin' cows on the farm! Up! [Squidward takes the plate] ;s1e13_10 Squidward; Thanks, Farmer Brown. [gives the plate to Incidental 5] It's been a thrill serving you. ;s1e13_11 Incidental 5 ; Can I get some extra salt? ;s1e13_12 Squidward; We're all out. ;s1e13_13 Incidental 5 ; Could you check? ;s1e13_14 Squidward; No. [Incidental 5 glares at him as he leaves. Bubble Bass walks up to order] Let me guess, tiny, a small salad? ;s1e13_15 BubbleBass; I'll take a Double Triple Bossy Deluxe on a raft, four by four, animal-style, extra shingles with a shimmy and a squeeze, light axle grease, make it cry, burn it, and let it swim. [Squidward gives up writing all of that down] ;s1e13_16 Squidward; We serve food here, sir. ;s1e13_17 SpongeBob; [with the order done] I got it already, Squidward. [gasps] Bubble Bass! ;s1e13_18 BubbleBass; [pushes Squidward away] SquarePants! [walks to SpongeBob] I hear talk you make a mean Krabby Patty. ;s1e13_19 SpongeBob; [staring at Bubble Bass] Yep. I hear talk you're kinda picky. ;s1e13_20 BubbleBass;Yep.;s1e13_21 SpongeBob; Well then... here ya go! [Bubble Bass takes the plate and sits down where he examines the Krabby Patty until he decides to take a bite] Well, Bubble Bass, whaddaya think? ;s1e13_22 BubbleBass; This is pretty good. Only one thing. You forgot the pickles! [shows no pickles on the patty. The crowd gasps] ;s1e13_23 SpongeBob;No!;s1e13_24 BubbleBass; The best there is? I don't think so. You lose! [laughs] ;s1e13_25 SpongeBob; [checks the patty for pickles] But, the pickles should be right where they always are. I know I put them on! [the customers are disappointed. SpongeBob tears the patty apart, searching for the pickles] Where are those pickles? Pickles? Pickles? Pickles? [Bubble Bass walks up to Mr. Krabs, and throws Squidward out of the way again] ;s1e13_26 BubbleBass; I believe you owe me two bucks. ;s1e13_27 Mr. Krabs ; Two bucks?! ;s1e13_28 BubbleBass; Your guarantee. [points to the menu where in tiny print it says 'money back guarantee'] ;s1e13_29 Mr. Krabs ; Oh. That. Well, can't we talk about this? [takes out two dollars and Bubble Bass grabs it] ;s1e13_30 BubbleBass;No.;s1e13_31 Mr. Krabs ; [pulls the money back] How about a discount on restroom tokens? [Bubble Bass takes the money] ;s1e13_32 BubbleBass; Afraid not. ;s1e13_33 Mr. Krabs ; How's about a [Bubble Bass starts walking away but Mr. Krabs holds onto his dollar] free glass of water? A dozen free glasses of water! I'll even put ice in it! [Bubble Bass walks out the Krusty Krab with the money] No! Come back! Two dollars! [sobs] Two dollars, no! No! [walks over to SpongeBob] ;s1e13_34 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs, I know I put pickles on that Krabby Patty. ;s1e13_35 Mr. Krabs ; [grabs SpongeBob] That two bucks is comin' out of your paycheck! [SpongeBob tries to hang onto the floor] ;s1e13_36 SpongeBob; Wait! Wait! Wait! [Mr. Krabs throws him into the kitchen] ;s1e13_37 Mr. Krabs ; Get back to work, we got orders waitin'! ;s1e13_38 Squidward; I need a Krabby Patty. ;s1e13_39 SpongeBob; Okay, I am not gonna blow it this time. Let's see. Bun down. Then ketchup, then mustard, then... pickles? No! That's not right! [starts a new patty] Bun down. Mustard, then ketchup, lettuce, then the... pickles? No! [tries again] Mustard down, bun stuff down, d'oh, where's the patty go? [tries again and uses the same bun] Pickles, ketchup, wait! D'oh, think! Think! I'm losin' it! [tries again] Bun down, shoe, mustard, pan, bun, no! [Mr. Krabs comes in] Mr. Krabs, I am so confused. I can't remember how to do anything. ;s1e13_40 Mr. Krabs ; Why don't you take the rest of the day off? ;s1e13_41 SpongeBob; Oh, no, Mr. Krabs. Who will make the Krabby Patties? ;s1e13_42 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, don't worry about that. We've got Squidward! ;s1e13_43 Squidward; Huh? What? [SpongeBob walks out and tries to leave] ;s1e13_44 {system}; [the scene bubbles transition to that night] ;s1e13_45 SpongeBob; Oh... was it mattress, mattress, sheets, pillow, then... SpongeBob? Or... [hits his head with his fist] D'oh... think, Sponge! Oh yeah! It was mattress, SpongeBob, mattress, then sheets, pillow. [gets in between the two mattresses] Good night, Gary. ;s1e13_46 Gary;Meow.;s1e13_47 SpongeBob; Aw, this isn't right. [he slips out and stands upside-down on his bed] Good night, Gary. ;s1e13_48 Gary;Meow.;s1e13_49 SpongeBob; Wait, this isn't right either. [SpongeBob lays down on his back] Nope. [SpongeBob is between each railing of the ladder] Nuh-uh. [tries sleeping with a mattress on his head] Negative. [tries sleeping on the ground next to his mattresses] C'mon, c'mon! Get it right. [tries in the lifesaver] Wrong. Wrong! Wrong! Nope! Naw! Negatory! Nyet! [keeps doing the wrong things as the clock fast-forwards to morning and the rooster crows where the alarm goes off. SpongeBob is on the floor under his bed] Aww, I almost had it! Alarm clock. D'oh, how do I turn this thing off? Think, think, think, think! ;s1e13_50 Gary;Meow.;s1e13_51 SpongeBob; Gary! [picks up Gary and shoves him in the foghorn alarm with dolphin noise where it is still going off with a squeak.] ;s1e13_52 Squidward; [At the Krusty Krab, there is black smoke coming from kitchen. Squidward coughs loudly, and clears the smoke off with a fire extinguisher] Patties are done. [Mr. Krabs notices black, burnt patties and gets irritated] ;s1e13_53 Mr. Krabs ; Urrgh! [Turns backwards from the counter after hearing customers starting to complain] ;s1e13_54 Incidental 30 ; Hey, he burnt my Krabby Patty. [his patty is burnt] ;s1e13_55 Incidental 63 ; He burnt my fries! [the burnt fries are piled up] ;s1e13_56 Incidental 65 ; [briefly drinks his burnt shake] He burnt my shake! ;s1e13_57 Mr. Krabs ; No! Come back! [sobs] No! No! Arrgh... I gotta get SpongeBob back! ;s1e13_58 {system}; [cuts to SpongeBob's house he nailed a toaster to the door] ;s1e13_59 Mr. Krabs ; [opens door] SpongeBob? ;s1e13_60 {system}; [music playing in reverse the house is a total disaster as everything is misplaced and things are everywhere and opposite.] ;s1e13_61 Mr. Krabs ;SpongeBob!;s1e13_62 SpongeBob; [he walks into view backwards and is wearing a pair of underwear over his head] Mr. Krabs, hello. Do you how do? ;s1e13_63 Mr. Krabs ; Why you talkin' funny, lad? [takes the underwear off SpongeBob's head] ;s1e13_64 SpongeBob; I anything can't do right since because pickles. ;s1e13_65 Mr. Krabs ; Nonsense, you'll be back makin' Krabby Patties like your old self in no time! ;s1e13_66 SpongeBob; I think don't ready back to go to work, Mr. Krabs. [walks off] ;s1e13_67 Mr. Krabs ; But you're fine, me boy! [SpongeBob walks right through the wooden kitchen door] Ooh... uhh, well... maybe not. [walks into the kitchen where SpongeBob is nailing a piece of bread to the table] All we need to do is get your confidence back. So you can make me more money! I-I-I mean, uh, patties. [chuckles] ;s1e13_68 SpongeBob; I how do that? ;s1e13_69 Mr. Krabs ; It's like riding a bike. You never forget! [notices a bike in a boiling pot of water on the stove] Uhh... um... I'm gonna help ya! [both of them are now shown sitting on the ground in SpongeBob's living room] If you learn to make a Krabby Patty again, your life will be back in order. [takes out a blanket with all the ingredients on it] ;s1e13_70 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs, I don't know if I... ;s1e13_71 Mr. Krabs ; Take your time. [SpongeBob thinks of the Krabby Patty formula. It soon turns to night then day again. SpongeBob reaches for a bun and Mr. Krabs gets excited. SpongeBob puts bun back down] ;s1e13_72 SpongeBob; No, no, no, no, no. [Day becomes night again. Then day again and then night again. Mr. Krabs is sleeping until SpongeBob wakes him up] I got it! I got it! It's all very clear to me now, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e13_73 Mr. Krabs ; It is? ;s1e13_74 SpongeBob; Yes! I finally realize that [angry] I can't do it! I can't do it, Mr. Krabs! I'm a failure! ;s1e13_75 Mr. Krabs ; Don't talk like that! ;s1e13_76 SpongeBob; Don't you get it, you crustaceous cheapskate? I can't make a Double Krabby Patty with the works! [Makes patty as he tells Mr. Krabs the ingredients] I can't put a patty on a bun, with lettuce, cheese, onions, tomatoes, ketchup, mustard, pickles, and top bun together in that order! [realizes that he just put the patty together in the right order, which makes Mr. Krabs smirk] ;s1e13_77 Mr. Krabs ; It's time. ;s1e13_78 {system}; [Mr. Krabs and SpongeBob walk back to the Krusty Krab and Squidward is burnt with black smoke. SpongeBob rescues Squidward from the burning kitchen and sprays the burnt Squidward with the fire extinguisher] ;s1e13_79 Incidental 70 ; Hey, SpongeBob's back! [customers are cheering] ;s1e13_80 {system}; SpongeBob? Aw, the old chef. ;s1e13_81 BubbleBass; [he enters the restaurant, shoving the large crowd of people out of his way in the process] I hear SquarePants is back! [SpongeBob opens the kitchen door] ;s1e13_82 SpongeBob; I'm right here, Bubble Bass. ;s1e13_83 BubbleBass; I thought I ran you out of town. [spits a loogie into a bucket] ;s1e13_84 SpongeBob; This is where I belong. [holds up some bubbles and blows one. Bubble Bass gives a weird sounding roar] Rawr. ;s1e13_85 {system}; [The crowd gasps. SpongeBob and Bubble Bass glare at each other, while Mr. Krabs is sweating with anticipation.] ;s1e13_86 BubbleBass; Give me the regular, and this time, don't forget the pickles. ;s1e13_87 SpongeBob; [rushes into the kitchen and comes back with a Krabby Patty in the blink of an eye] I didn't. ;s1e13_88 {system}; [Mr. Krabs is violently sweating as Bubble Bass examines and eats the patty. It also cuts to the crowd, then Squidward, then SpongeBob.] ;s1e13_89 BubbleBass; Hmm... Still no pickles! [SpongeBob notices] See? [sticks out his tongue with all the chewed up food on it. Everyone is disgusted at the sight of it] You failed again, SpongeBob LoserPants! [laughs] ;s1e13_90 SpongeBob; [looks at Bubble Bass' mouth] Wait a minute! [grabs Bubble Bass' tongue and pulls it out] Look! [shows four pickles under Bubble Bass' tongue] He's been hiding the pickles under his tongue the whole time! ;s1e13_91 Mr. Krabs ; And there's the pickles from last time, too! ;s1e13_92 Incidental 45 ; And there's my car keys! [everyone walks up to Bubble Bass, all glaring at him] ;s1e13_93 BubbleBass; And... there's my ride! [rushes out of the Krusty Krab] ;s1e13_94 Mr. Krabs ; Three cheers for the return of our master fry cook, SpongeBob! Hip hip... ;s1e13_95 All;Hooray!;s1e13_96 Squidward;Hooray.;s1e13_97 Mr. Krabs ; Hip hip... ;s1e13_98 All;Hooray!;s1e13_99 Squidward;Whoop-de-doo.;s1e13_100 Mr. Krabs ; Hip hip... ;s1e13_101 All;Hooray!;s1e13_102 Squidward; Oh, boy. ;s1e13_103 SpongeBob; And three cheers for the fry cook who took my place when I was gone: Squidward! [Squidward smiles] Hip hip... ;s1e13_104 All;" Boo! [Squidward is shocked and frowns. The frown becomes more droopier with each ""Boo""] ";s1e13_105 SpongeBob; Hip hip... ;s1e13_106 All; Boo! [cuts to an outside shot of the Krusty Krab] ;s1e13_107 SpongeBob; Hip hip... ;s1e13_108 All;Boo!;s1e13_109 SpongeBob; Hip hip... ;s1e13_110 Customer; Boo! You stink! [the episode ends] ;s1e13_111 French Narrator ; Mrs. Puff's Boating School. Where diligent students learn the rules of the road. ;s1e14_1 Mrs. Puff ; Everyone, put down your books, because it's time to pick out the hall monitor of the day! [SpongeBob squeezes his pencil so hard it shoots up into the air] Let's see here. This week's hall monitor will be Bart, Jimmy, no, no, Tina, Ralph, mm... [gasps and shakes nervously] ...SpongeBob...! [SpongeBob moves his desk between two rows] It's Jimmy! Jimmy's the hall monitor. ;s1e14_2 Incidental 27 ; Mrs. Puff, I've done it already! [SpongeBob moves his desk closer] ;s1e14_3 Mrs. Puff ; Ohh... Phil? ;s1e14_4 Phil; No way, Mrs. Puff. [SpongeBob moves his desk closer] ;s1e14_5 Mrs. Puff ; Uhh, Tina, you're the hall monitor. ;s1e14_6 Incidental 8 ; Hey, I've done it 3 times already! [SpongeBob moves up closer] ;s1e14_7 Mrs. Puff ;B...uh...B-Beth!;s1e14_8 {system}; She graduated! ;s1e14_9 Mrs. Puff ; Henry?! [SpongeBob moves closer] Vera?! [SpongeBob moves closer] Clayton?! [SpongeBob is poking Mrs. Puff with his desk as she sighs] Alright, I guess I have no choice. [gulps] The hall monitor of the day is [she sighs] SpongeBob. [SpongeBob launches into the air] ;s1e14_10 SpongeBob; Yahoo! Hall monitor SpongeBob reporting for duty, ma'am! I am ready to assume my position... in the hall! I will protect all that are weak... in the hall! All rules will be enforced... in the hall! ;s1e14_11 Mrs. Puff ; Okay! Just take the hat and belt. [tries handing him the uniform] ;s1e14_12 SpongeBob; I can't accept that yet, ma'am. First, I have to make my speech. ;s1e14_13 Mrs. Puff ; You can't make this easy, can you? ;s1e14_14 SpongeBob; Classmates! Who am I to deserve such a great honor? Why, I would be nothing without Mrs. Puff. ;s1e14_15 Mrs. Puff ; Give me a break. ;s1e14_16 SpongeBob;" And to my public, all I can say is I'm touched. [sniffs] And furthermore, I will carry out my duties... [clock moves forward in time as SpongeBob continues his speech] ...crime and punishment, punishment and crime in the hall! [at this point, almost everyone is dreary-eyed] Which reminds me of an extremely long speech written by the greatest hall monitor of all time. [takes out a long roll of paper] ""Friends, students, juvenile delinquents, lend me your ears."" [the clock has disappeared, and it is now much later in the day. Puff is asleep at her desk] In conclusion, and without a moment to spare, I will put on this uniform [takes out the hat and belt] and assume my duties as... [puts on the uniform deep voice] ...hall monitor! Wish me luck, Mrs. Puff! [walks towards the door then turns around] Oh, and I will be re... [bell rings as all students excitedly run out the door, over SpongeBob] ";s1e14_17 Mrs. Puff ; SpongeBob, are you okay? ;s1e14_18 SpongeBob; [muffled] I overdid the speech again, didn't I? ;s1e14_19 Mrs. Puff ; I'm afraid so. ;s1e14_20 SpongeBob; Aww, tartar sauce. I guess I won't be needing this. [takes off the uniform] I hardly knew ya. [gives the uniform to Mrs. Puff and walks away saddened] ;s1e14_21 Mrs. Puff ; Uhh... SpongeBob? ;s1e14_22 SpongeBob; Yes, Mrs. Puff? ;s1e14_23 Mrs. Puff ; I can at least let you wear it until tomorrow. ;s1e14_24 SpongeBob; A-hoo! [dives into the uniform] Thanks, Mrs. Puff! ;s1e14_25 Mrs. Puff ; What are the consequences of what I've just done? [cut to SpongeBob walking down the street, singing somewhat incomprehensibly. Then notices a broken traffic light] ;s1e14_26 SpongeBob; Broken traffic light! Who's to say my monitor duties should end just because the bell rang? I can be helpful anywhere! This looks like a job for the [deep voice] hall monitor! [directs traffic, with a whistle, to their destination using all sorts of hand gestures, but ends up causing a huge wreck in the end] What would this town do without you, SpongeBob? ;s1e14_27 Fred; My leg! My leg! ;s1e14_28 SpongeBob; On patrol. I'm on patrol. [notices a house with an open window] Uh-oh, an open window. [peeks through the window and there is a couple eating] ;s1e14_29 Incidental 12 ; More seaweed medley, dear? ;s1e14_30 SpongeBob; The fools. They've left themselves susceptible to danger. I must show them the error of their ways through example. [jumps through the window and onto their table in a ski mask, screaming as he does so] I'm the open window maniac! [both run out screaming] I hope you learned a valuable lesson! [shuts the window and begins walking again] On patrol. I'm on patrol. I'm on patrol... [gasps as he sees a puddle of pink goo on the ground] Vandals! Another crime. [takes his finger and tastes the pink goo] hmm...strawberry! I must act! [more pink goo falls on his head. He looks up and sees Patrick sitting on top of a wall and eating some strawberry ice cream] Patrick... [looks around for the voice he just heard] Patrick... Patrick... ;s1e14_31 Patrick; My ice cream! It's alive! [screams and throws away the ice cream] ;s1e14_32 SpongeBob; Patrick! Down here! ;s1e14_33 Patrick; Oh, SpongeBob, it's you. [ice cream cone is on SpongeBob's face] ;s1e14_34 SpongeBob; Patrick. Come down here. [Patrick jumps down on top of SpongeBob] ;s1e14_35 Patrick; SpongeBob? SpongeBob? ;s1e14_36 SpongeBob; I'm down here. ;s1e14_37 Patrick; Hehe, you look funny! [hops off SpongeBob and pulls him off the ground] Hi, SpongeBob. ;s1e14_38 SpongeBob; That's hall monitor to you! [fixes his shape] ;s1e14_39 Patrick; Sorry, officer. ;s1e14_40 SpongeBob; Sorry's not good enough, Patrick. You've committed a crime, and I'm taking you in. ;s1e14_41 Patrick; What crime? [shows him the ice cream that is on the ground] I'm a bad person! [cries] ;s1e14_42 Morty;" [High Voice] Extra! Extra! ""Maniac strikes Bikini Bottom!"" City paralyzed with fear! [gives one to SpongeBob] [Gruff Voice] Take it, friends. Arm yourselves with knowledge. [runs off] [High voice again] Extra! Extra! Maniac strikes Bikini Bottom! ";s1e14_43 SpongeBob;" [reads paper] ""Maniac. Bikini Bottom? Car wrecks? Break-in?"". Who better to bring this maniac to justice than me, [deep voice] the hall monitor! But I can't handle this case alone. Patrick, are you ready to give up your life of crime? ";s1e14_44 SpongeBob; Hmmm... now you just need a symbol of authority. [Patrick puts the ice cream cone on his head] Perfect! It is our duty to catch this maniac and bring him to justice! But how to proceed? Listen, deputy, you're an ex-criminal. What would you do? ;s1e14_45 Patrick; Hmmm... I'd get an ice cream! [both walk out an ice cream store with ice cream] ;s1e14_46 SpongeBob; Okay, now what? ;s1e14_47 Patrick; Hmmm... [both come out the ice cream store again with ice cream] ;s1e14_48 SpongeBob; This isn't working. [throws his ice cream away] We've got to do something else. Something with walkie-talkies! [takes out two walkie-talkies. Patrick drops his ice cream and happily grabs a walkie-talkie] And now, duty calls! Alright, deputy, I'll go that way, you go some different way! Run ?em out! [SpongeBob runs off sounding like a siren. The police come driving up and stop beside Patrick] ;s1e14_49 Incidental 118 ; Afternoon, son. ;s1e14_50 Patrick; Hello, brothers. [salutes to the officers, then raises both eyebrows whilst pointing to his cone hat] ;s1e14_51 Incidental 118 ; Son, we're looking for the maniac. ;s1e14_52 Incidental 118 ; Have you seen this man?! [He whips out a poster that says WANTED MANIAC with SpongeBob's picture on it.] ;s1e14_53 Patrick; [screams] It's the maniac! Take him away, take him away! ;s1e14_54 Incidental 118 ; Calm down, son. It's just a drawing, not the real thing. Now we're gonna show you this picture again, and you tell us if you've seen this guy. Understand? ;s1e14_55 Patrick; Yeah, uh-huh. ;s1e14_56 Incidental 118 ; Okay. [Orange Incidental 118 shows Patrick the poster again] ;s1e14_57 Patrick; [screams] Horrible! ;s1e14_58 {system}; [Orange Incidental 118 removes the poster, bemused. He holds up the poster again. Patrick screams again. Both cops then look at each other and smile slyly. Orange Incidental 118 repeatedly shows and takes away the poster as Patrick screams every single time. Eventually, the cops decide they've had enough fun.] ;s1e14_59 Incidental 118 ; Stay indoors, son. ;s1e14_60 Incidental 118 ; And, uhh, take that cone off your head. [both laugh as they drive off] ;s1e14_61 Patrick; [takes out walkie-talkie] SpongeBob? Come in, SpongeBob. Answer! ;s1e14_62 SpongeBob; SpongeBob here, Patrick. Report. ;s1e14_63 Patrick; [over walkie-talkie] I don't wanna be a policeman anymore. I'm scared! ;s1e14_64 SpongeBob; Get a hold of yourself, deputy. ;s1e14_65 Patrick; [over walkie-talkie, sobbing] I wanna go home! ;s1e14_66 SpongeBob; [sighs] Poor rookie. Alright, I'm on my way back. ;s1e14_67 Patrick; Hurry, SpongeBob, I think it's getting... [the bright sky suddenly, becomes dark] ...dark. ;s1e14_68 SpongeBob; Just put on your siren and I'll be right there. ;s1e14_69 Patrick; Wee-woo. Wee-woo. Wee-woo. Wee-woo. [Patrick picks up the poster that the officers showed him earlier. Then sees a darkish figure down the road. It's SpongeBob, but Patrick doesn't realize it Patrick gasps loudly] Wee-woo! Wee-woo! Wee-woo! SpongeBob! I see him! ;s1e14_70 SpongeBob; [over walkie-talkie] Where is he, Patrick? ;s1e14_71 Patrick; [over walkie-talkie] At the intersection of Conch and Coral. [SpongeBob turns his head around to read the street sign that says Conch Street and Coral Avenue] ;s1e14_72 SpongeBob; That's where I am! He's right on top of me, but I can't see him! What's he doing? ;s1e14_73 Patrick; Uhh, he's just standing there... menacingly! [screams over walkie-talkie] Get out of there, SpongeBob! [SpongeBob screams] That's his maniac shriek! He's going to attack! [SpongeBob cries while running around in circles] He's acting all crazy! Run! Hide behind that building! [SpongeBob hides behind the building] No, he's behind that building! Oh, quick, hide behind that street sign! [SpongeBob hides behind the street sign] No wait! The maniac just went behind that sign! Quick! Get under the street light! [SpongeBob gets under the street lights] No wait, agh, he's there, too! Run for your life! [SpongeBob jumps inside a mailbox. As he tries to relax, the radio is cutting out] ;s1e14_74 SpongeBob; [over walkie-talkie] Say again, deputy? ;s1e14_75 Patrick; The maniac's in the mailbox! [SpongeBob screams and bursts his arms and legs through the mailbox. He alternates between screaming and crazily jabbering as he runs through three buildings, causing them to topple over and eventually crashes through a fence plasted with wanted posters] ;s1e14_76 SpongeBob; [takes a look at a wanted poster] Huh, this guy's not half-bad-looking for a maniac. Wait a minute, Patrick, I'm the maniac! [Patrick screams in the background and a mass of police cars and several policeman surround SpongeBob] ;s1e14_77 Incidental 118 ; We'll take that as a confession. [Mrs. Puff appears] ;s1e14_78 Mrs. Puff ; SpongeBob SquarePants, there you are! I turn my back on you for one minute and you destroy half the city! You should be ashamed of yourself! [SpongeBob slumps sadly at these words] ;s1e14_79 Incidental 118 ; You know this guy? ;s1e14_80 Mrs. Puff ; Of course I do. I'm the one who gave him the uniform in the first place. He's my responsibility. [the cops glare at her] Uh-oh... [at the boating school where the whole class, except SpongeBob, is sleeping. Mrs. Puff is teaching class from jail through the TV] And in conclusion, students: red means stop, green means go. And SpongeBob... ;s1e14_81 SpongeBob; [frowns nervously] Yes, Mrs. Puff? ;s1e14_82 Mrs. Puff ; I'd like to see you after class. 6 months from now! [jail closure sound] ;s1e15_1 French Narrator ; Ah, Jellyfish Fields. Here we find SpongeBob once again stalking the wild jellyfish. SpongeBob? Allo? SpongeBob? Hmmm... he's supposed to be here somewhere... [narrator looks around and sees a square-shaped coral] A-ha! [Jellyfish floats by. SpongeBob puts his glasses on] ;s1e15_2 SpongeBob; Safety first. [SpongeBob slides to a jellyfish and captures it] A-ha! I finally gotcha! [SpongeBob grabs a wooden stool and sits on it. Puts on a farmer hat and 'milks' the jellyfish. Jelly comes out and squirts on a piece of bread. The jellyfish moos like a cow. He eats and starts speaking like the French Narrator.] Ah, there is nothing better than the taste of natural jelly from a jellyfish. [normal voice] See you later! [walks off but jellyfish floats towards him with his glasses] Oh, oh my glasses! Thanks, little guy! Bye! [the jellyfish floats with SpongeBob] I can't play anymore, jellyfish. I got to get home. [jellyfish hangs onto SpongeBob's nose] No. You can't go home with me. [jellyfish walks behind him. The jellyfish's steps are squeaking, like SpongeBob's] Jellyfish, you've got to stay here! [the jellyfish floats towards SpongeBob] Hey! [puts the jellyfish on a rock] Stay! [walks backwards] Stay... [jellyfish floats around SpongeBob. SpongeBob grabs the jellyfish and uses a slingshot to launch him somewhere else but the jellyfish ends up on his back. The jellyfish giggles. SpongeBob pulls the jellyfish off] [exasperated] Jellyfish! For the last time, you cannot come home with me! [SpongeBob looks at the jellyfish sternly. The jellyfish deflates as if he was sad. SpongeBob decides to keep him] Ahh, what the heck! [SpongeBob, with the jellyfish on a rope, like a dog, walk by Squidward's house] Squidward! Hey, Squidward! Squidward! Squidwardiard! [Squidward peeks out his window] Squidward! Look at my new pet! ;s1e15_3 Squidward; That's no pet, that's a wild animal. ;s1e15_4 SpongeBob;" No he isn't! Watch this! Fetch! [throws a stick so the jellyfish returns it. SpongeBob is holding up three fingers] How many fingers am I holding up? [the jellyfish hums deeply three times] Play dead! [jellyfish is buried underground with a tomb that says ""R.I.P."" He pops up] ";s1e15_5 Squidward; I wouldn't let that thing into my house even if it was potty-trained! [the jellyfish, still on the rope, is on a toilet reading a newspaper as he hums casually] I didn't need to see that. ;s1e15_6 SpongeBob; Well, we're going to my house to have a little fun. ;s1e15_7 Squidward; How can you possibly have fun with a jellyfish? [SpongeBob and the jellyfish dance to Stadium Rave A. Also, various colors change as they dance. Disco lights rotate around the room. SpongeBob's house is vibrating from the music] SpongeBob is the only guy I know who can have fun with a jellyfish... for 12 hours! ;s1e15_8 SpongeBob; [stops dancing. He is exhausted, sees the jellyfish dance more] Whew! Wow, you sure like to dance. Well, that's enough for tonight. [turns the music off] It's time to go to bed. [as he walks off, the jellyfish turns the music back on] Huh? [walks over to turn the music off] You got it all wrong, little fella. [the jellyfish turns the music back on. SpongeBob turns it back off] Bed. Repeat after me. [SpongeBob ties the rope around the jellyfish] Bed! [the jellyfish reaches for the stereo but SpongeBob pulls it off. Upstairs, SpongeBob ties the rope around his bedpost] We'll just keep you right here. ;s1e15_9 Gary;Meow.;s1e15_10 SpongeBob; Quit worrying, Gary. He'll be just fine. Good night, everybody. [as he is sleeping throughout the night, other jellyfish float inside the pineapple] ;s1e15_11 Gary; [wakes up] Meow. [jellyfish opens the window, and the 4 jellyfish talking in jellyfish speaking. Gary gets angry] Meow. [gets squirted with jelly from all the jellyfish, they laugh at Gary, and continue squirting jelly on him] Meow. [More jellyfish enter SpongeBob's House. It's now daytime and the rooster crows everyone up] ;s1e15_12 SpongeBob; Good morning, Gary. Good morning, jellyfish. Jellyfish? Jellyfish? Here, jellyfish. Oh, jelly! [puts on his green robe and goes to check downstairs] ;s1e15_13 Gary; [Follows SpongeBob to the doorway, while completely filled with jelly.] Meow. ;s1e15_14 SpongeBob; Oh, jellyfi-! [slips on some jelly. Opens a door leading into his living room and sees jellyfish dancing to music. The jellyfish are having a dance party.] Where'd you all come from? [jellyfish form a figure of a hand and the hand grabs SpongeBob. They stick over a light bulb like a disco ball and spin him. Then falls to the ground] Okay, that's it. Party is over! You guys have overstayed your welcome. [As SpongeBob is walking to the stereo, jellyfish form a flight of stairs that SpongeBob walks up and but does not notice] This music is way too loud. [He screams as he falls down. Jellyfish carry SpongeBob in a triangle] Very funny. [jellyfish carry SpongeBob in a rectangle] I'm serious! ;s1e15_15 {system}; [Jellyfish carry SpongeBob up and down the screen. The scene then goes to SpongeBob's house bouncing up and down because of the loud party. Scene cuts to Squidward's house. Squidward is still lying in his bed, holding a pillow against his face. He has not slept all night.] ;s1e15_16 Squidward; Grr! 18 hours! [falls off his bed, picks up the phone and dials SpongeBob's number] I'm gonna give that SpongeBob a piece of my mind! ;s1e15_17 {system}; [Cut back to the party. The phone rings and a jellyfish picks it up.] [garbled] Hello? ;s1e15_18 Squidward;" SpongeBob, listen to me, you square-headed assault on my ears! I've had enough of this! [Jelly squirts through the phone and onto Squidward's face] Strawberry. [Squidward plays his clarinet outside his window] Two can play at this! [plays ""Row Row Row Your Boat"" with his clarinet badly. Jellyfish form a smiley face.] ";s1e15_19 SpongeBob; Come on, guys, enough is enough! [SpongeBob hears the clarinet music in the distance.] Huh? [Cuts back to the Jellyfish's smile, but this time, turns into an angry frown when Squidward plays his clarinet] Uh-oh! [Jellyfish sting SpongeBob] Hey, take it easy! Ow! Okay, I'll talk to him! [SpongeBob peeks his head out his window] Squidward! Would it be possible to play your clarinet a little... better? I don't think the jellyfish like it. ;s1e15_20 Squidward; The jellyfish don't like...? [sarcastically] Why, sure, pal, I can play better. ;s1e15_21 SpongeBob; Okay, he said he'll play better. ;s1e15_22 {system};" [Squidward's house rotates slowly towards SpongeBob's house. He has a giant amp set behind him. In front of him is a microphone. Squidward inhales deeply as his house stretches, then he plays ""Row Row Row Your Boat"" with his clarinet again, but extremely loudly.] ";s1e15_23 SpongeBob; Uh-oh! That's not better! [Jellyfish knocks SpongeBob's coral plant over] Hey! Take it easy with that! [The jellyfish knock over his television] Those are my things! [The jellyfish knock over a wall decoration] Don't break th- Dow! [The jellyfish float out of the party and into Squidward's house] ;s1e15_24 Squidward; Uh, wait, I can turn it down. Ow! Ow! Ow! [the jellyfish sting Squidward and float back into SpongeBob's house, returning to their party.]A welt-covered Squidward walks up to the door and gives SpongeBob his clarinet] Everybody's a critic. You won't be hearing from me anymore. [hands SpongeBob his clarinet] ;s1e15_25 SpongeBob; Hey, now, that wasn't nice! [jellyfish take the clarinet and snap it in half. A fire forms and they dance around it in a circle. Boat horn toots as SpongeBob finally reaches his breaking point, shouting] Okay, that is it! Everybody out! ;s1e15_26 {system}; [SpongeBob grabs the stereo and runs toward the door but the jellyfish try to take it back so they can party more. Both sides accidentally let go and the stereo falls to floor and shatters into pieces with a crash causing the music to stop. SpongeBob gulps and the jellyfish start to quiver, due to the loss of the music, thus ending their party. SpongeBob stammers. The jellyfish get angry and sting SpongeBob] ;s1e15_27 SpongeBob; Come on, Gary! [SpongeBob and Gary head up to the roof. SpongeBob's house vibrates forcefully, and the jellyfish start to swarm around the house.] Gary, you were right. Thanks for not rubbing it in. [SpongeBob looks scared and his teeth chatter. Gary clicks his eyes together making a beat that the jellyfish can dance to.] Huh? They stopped? [holds Gary's eyes together and the jellyfish get angry again. Then he lets go of Gary's eyes and they dance again. Does this a couple more times and notices a trend.] Gary! Don't... stop... shaking it! ;s1e15_28 {system}; [SpongeBob takes Gary to Jellyfish Fields, the jellyfish following him behind in a line. Along the way, SpongeBob has other creatures and things join in the rhythm, first bubbles popping, a chest opening and releasing bubbles on the first beat, an anchor chain making tambourine noises, a dolphin chirping every fourth beat, a trio of anemones making synthesizer noises, a line of singing clamshells, jellyfish playing a harp, and soon a lively melody is playing. Eventually, he gets the jellyfish back home to Jellyfish Fields and he runs back to his home.] ;s1e15_29 French Narrator ; Today, SpongeBob has learned one of the sea's harshest lessons: wild animals can throw very wild parties. ;s1e15_30 {system}; [SpongeBob shakes Gary's eye, congratulating him. Meanwhile, Squidward sinks down into his bubble bath as he groans in pain.] ;s1e15_31 French Narrator ; Ooh, I felt that. ;s1e15_32 {system}; [The episode begins with SpongeBob running toward Sandy's treedome doorstep.] ;s1e16_1 SpongeBob; Hey, Sandy. Hey, Sandy. Hey, Sandy! ;s1e16_2 {system}; [SpongeBob knocks her door. While waiting for a response from the door, he notices a spaceship comes up from underneath the ground at the left side of the treedome.] ;s1e16_3 SpongeBob;Wow!;s1e16_4 {system}; [The rocket finally rises up to ground level. Sandy peeks her head out of a spaceship window.] ;s1e16_5 Sandy; Howdy, SpongeBob, how do you like it? ;s1e16_6 SpongeBob; What is it? ;s1e16_7 Sandy; It's a rocket ship, duh! I'll meet you downstairs and show you around. [rides an elevator on the bottom floor and meets SpongeBob downstairs] ;s1e16_8 SpongeBob; Wow, what are you gonna do with it? ;s1e16_9 Sandy; [pointing to a poster of the moon] I'm goin' to the moon, SpongeBob! ;s1e16_10 SpongeBob; The moon! Can I go? ;s1e16_11 Sandy; No way, SpongeBob. Especially after your little mishap with my whirlybird. [looks at a graveyard of dead animals, which the camera follows] Besides, there's not enough room for you. ;s1e16_12 SpongeBob; But I don't take up that much space! [squishes himself into a little square] See? [downsizes himself to fit into a little drawer] I can fit in here. [closes the drawer] Mmm, cozy. ;s1e16_13 Sandy; I need that drawer. ;s1e16_14 SpongeBob; Well, how about... [jumps into a test tube] This? [jumps into another test tube] Or this? [jumps into another test tube] Or this? [spins in a flushing motion] ;s1e16_15 Sandy; SpongeBob, this isn't for fun. [points to her clipboard with math equations on it] See this? This is science. I don't have time for games and I don't have time for stowaways. ;s1e16_16 SpongeBob; [behind a set of bars] Fine. [in a deep voice] Put me in the brig, [squeezes himself in the air vent] I don't mind! ;s1e16_17 Sandy; That's the air vent, SpongeBob. [pushes a button to turn the air vent on that blows SpongeBob out of it] I need that, too. ;s1e16_18 SpongeBob; Oh, please, can I go? Can I? Can I? Huh? Please? ;s1e16_19 Sandy; All right. Y'all can ride in the cargo hold if you just- ;s1e16_20 SpongeBob; [running around the ship] Yeah! Goin' to the moon! Moon ride, moon ride, moon ride! ;s1e16_21 Sandy; [grabs SpongeBob] But this time, just don't touch anything, okay? ;s1e16_22 {system}; [Bubble transitions to Sandy pumping a gun and SpongeBob comes to watch her] ;s1e16_23 SpongeBob; Wow, look at that pop gun. Are we gonna go hunting aliens on the moon? ;s1e16_24 Sandy; Aww, hush, silly. [shoots her gun and 3 gray nets cover a couple items] This is for harvesting moon rocks. ;s1e16_25 SpongeBob; Well, when you're done playing with rocks, you could use that for some serious alien hunting. ;s1e16_26 Sandy; Aliens? Are you nuts? I've been to the moon, there are no aliens. ;s1e16_27 Sandy; SpongeBob, you don't know the first thing about outer space. Now go home and get some shut eye. Be here tomorrow at the crack of dawn and leave your crazy alien notions behind. ;s1e16_28 {system}; [Scene cuts to SpongeBob's house at night. SpongeBob is trying to sleep. He checks the clock every few seconds, and tries to go back to sleep again.] ;s1e16_29 SpongeBob; [becoming fed up with waiting, shaking his clock] Oh, hurry up! [grabs two clothes pins] These oughta do the trick. [puts them on his eyelids] ;s1e16_30 Patrick; [Sitting in the window] Hi, SpongeBob! [clothes pins shoot off his eyes] ;s1e16_31 SpongeBob; What is it, Patrick? Can't you see I'm sleeping here? ;s1e16_32 Patrick; Well, I heard you're going on that moon trip tomorrow, so I just wanted to bring you something. ;s1e16_33 SpongeBob; A present? ;s1e16_34 Patrick; No. Uh, SpongeBob, is Sandy's rocket alien proof? ;s1e16_35 SpongeBob; There are no aliens, Patrick. Just ask Sandy. ;s1e16_36 Patrick; Well, I guess you won't be needing this alien repellent for your trip! [pulls out a spray can] ;s1e16_37 SpongeBob;" Alien repellent? Let me see that. [looks at the can] ""New Alien-Out Window Protectant. Does not stop burglars."" Well, I guess you're right, Patrick. We'd better go spray those windows! ";s1e16_38 {system}; [Bubble transitions to SpongeBob and Patrick walking up to the rocket] ;s1e16_39 Patrick; Look how big it is, SpongeBob! ;s1e16_40 SpongeBob; It's pretty impressive, all right. ;s1e16_41 Patrick; Come on! [both head for the rocket] ;s1e16_42 SpongeBob; We're just here to spray the windows, Patrick! ;s1e16_43 SpongeBob;" We don't! We're just spraying the- [Patrick pulls a blinking lever marked ""open,"" door opens on SpongeBob] -windows. ";s1e16_44 Patrick; I opened it, SpongeBob! Come on! [both walk inside] Holy sea cow, SpongeBob. This must be the control room. ;s1e16_45 SpongeBob; Yeah, just don't touch anything. [Patrick suddenly runs off] ;s1e16_46 {system}; [Patrick grabs a computer and starts playing with the controls] ;s1e16_47 Patrick; Look, I'm winning! ;s1e16_48 SpongeBob; Patrick, cut that out! Patrick, come on! We can't hang around in here. This is Sandy's big rocket, not some kind of fun... [SpongeBob turns around and looks at himself as thin in the mirror] ...house? ;s1e16_49 Patrick; Winner! Yeah! High score! Whoo hoo! ;s1e16_50 SpongeBob; Hey, Patrick, what game was that, anyway? ;s1e16_51 Patrick; I don't know! [notices a lever above his head] But let's see what this does! ;s1e16_52 SpongeBob; Patrick, I don't think we should... [Patrick pulls a lever and the two launch off the seat out of the rocket] ;s1e16_53 Patrick; I like rockets. [both fall back into the rocket] More! More! [approaches another machine] ;s1e16_54 SpongeBob; No more! [Patrick presses a button and both vibrate a lot then stop] Okay, one more. [vibrating again] Okay, that's enough. Let's go. ;s1e16_55 Patrick; Hey, I think this one starts it! [SpongeBob stops Patrick from pushing a button] ;s1e16_56 SpongeBob; Patrick, what are you doing? I'm the space traveler here. And I happen to know that that particular button is right over here. [presses the start button and the ship starts up] ;s1e16_57 Patrick; You've started the rocket! ;s1e16_58 Sandy; [wakes up to the alarm horns blaring and notices the smoke] Aww, SpongeBob... ;s1e16_59 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick hold onto each other while falling down a long shaft as the ship is taking off] ;s1e16_60 Patrick; Hang on, buddy! [while screaming, SpongeBob and Patrick are still falling down to the bottom of the ship. The ship flies upward out of the ocean past Bikini Atoll arriving into space, and both of them start to float.] Hey, we stopped falling! ;s1e16_61 SpongeBob; Look! [points at the dark galaxy] We're in space now! Whee! [both float around in the ship] ;s1e16_62 Patrick; [frantically worried] Hey! Whoa! Somebody get me down, or up, or something! ;s1e16_63 {system}; [SpongeBob laughs as the ship orbits around the moon] ;s1e16_64 Patrick; Hey, SpongeBob, watch this! [squirts toothpaste into some peanut butter] ;s1e16_65 SpongeBob; Hey, you got your toothpaste in my peanut butter! [he and Patrick laugh] ;s1e16_66 {system}; [The ship finishes circling the moon and prepares to return down to the surface. SpongeBob lifts a heavy barbell on one finger] ;s1e16_67 SpongeBob; Patrick, I can do this! ;s1e16_68 {system}; [The ship lands back into the sea and the barbell smashes into the ground and flattens SpongeBob's hand.] ;s1e16_69 Patrick; [scowls] Hey, who turned the heavy back on? ;s1e16_70 SpongeBob; We must be landing. ;s1e16_71 Patrick; All right! ;s1e16_72 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick run off to exit the ship. Meanwhile, Sandy uses her jetpack to fly up to the moon] ;s1e16_73 Sandy; Sometimes that SpongeBob is as dumb as a sack of peanuts. ;s1e16_74 {system}; [The ship is now in Bikini Bottom, landed nearby Squidward's house. While Sandy on jetpack searches for SpongeBob and Patrick on the moon, these two get out of the ship] ;s1e16_75 Patrick; Wow, it sure looks a lot like home. [Patrick sees Gary outside licking himself] Hey, look, it's Gary! Come here, Gary. Gary! ;s1e16_76 SpongeBob; Wait, don't go near it, Patrick! Can't you see this is all a trick? The aliens are projecting our memories onto the environment! They're trying to confuse us, Patrick. ;s1e16_77 Patrick; So you mean to say they?ve taken what we thought we think and make us think we thought our thoughts we?ve been thinking our thoughts we think we thought?! I think? ;s1e16_78 SpongeBob; Okay, but I'm not gonna to fall for it! [SpongeBob captures Gary with a gray net-like substance and Gary meows worriedly] Yeah! ;s1e16_79 Patrick; You got him, SpongeBob! Won't Sandy be proud. ;s1e16_80 SpongeBob;" Sandy. I forgot all about her. Oh, she's gonna hate us for stealing her rocket. But won't she feel silly when I bring her back a real live alien? Aw, she'll love me! [grabs Gary] Come on, Patrick, the more, the merrier! [tosses Gary into the ship. Ship's number increases from 00 to 01 game show ding from ""The Price Is Right""] ";s1e16_81 Patrick; Alien hunting! Alien hunting! ;s1e16_82 SpongeBob;" Shhh, Patrick, don't let them know we're onto them. ""Uh, yeah, alien hunting. I saw that on TV, too. Gee, Patrick, let's drop in on our old pal Squidward and see what he's up to!"" [whispering to Patrick] Make sure your gun is pumped. ";s1e16_83 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick go in and see Squidward sleeping and muttering] ;s1e16_84 SpongeBob; Look at it, Patrick, it's disgusting. ;s1e16_85 {system};" [Squidward moves his arms and legs around then puts them back down. He mutters incomprehensibly and says, ""Grandma."" SpongeBob and Patrick shake nervously and pose as if ready to fire. Afterwards, they creep toward him.] ";s1e16_86 SpongeBob; It's even uglier up close. Let's begin the analysis. [SpongeBob takes the covers off. Squidward is wearing a pink floral top] ;s1e16_87 Patrick; Wait! What's that? [SpongeBob takes a red bag out from underneath Squidward. It appears to be a hot water bottle] I think I'm gonna be sick. ;s1e16_88 SpongeBob; Patrick, do you know what this thing is? ;s1e16_89 Patrick;Stinky.;s1e16_90 SpongeBob; No. It's an egg sack. Let's look at the embryo. ;s1e16_91 {system};" [Patrick puts flashlight under the so-called ""egg sack"" and SpongeBob's hands are under it] ";s1e16_92 {system};Twins.;s1e16_93 {system}; [Squidward rolls over in his sleep and his right tentacle sticks on Patrick's helmet. Patrick looks up and sees the details of Squidward's right tentacle.] ;s1e16_94 Patrick; Pardon my French, but get this thing off me! ;s1e16_95 {system}; [SpongeBob takes off Squidward's right tentacle, but now Squidward's tentacle legs attach SpongeBob, which he quickly takes off. SpongeBob and Patrick try to get his tentacles away from them but they wake him up instead.] ;s1e16_96 Squidward; Patrick and SpongeBob? Get out of my bedroom! And give me back my tentacles. [pulls back his tentacles onto his bed] ;s1e16_97 Patrick; It's awake! ;s1e16_98 SpongeBob; [grabs his net gun] Let's capture the little phony! ;s1e16_99 Squidward; [screams] Get away from me! ;s1e16_100 {system};" [SpongeBob and Patrick try to capture Squidward but he runs away, in which the pillow is captured instead. SpongeBob jumps to Squidward's bed, does an ""oogie boogie,"" Patrick does a Tarzan yell and chases Squidward. Outside, Mr. Krabs walks up with his pet worm and notices Squidward's house shaking. SpongeBob and Patrick come out with Squidward captured.] ";s1e16_101 Mr. Krabs ; Ahoy, there, lads! Up a bit late to be playing pirate, aren't ye? [laughs] ;s1e16_102 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick point their guns at his head Mr. Krabs holds his claws up.] ;s1e16_103 Mr. Krabs ; Wait! Don't shoot! Okay, okay, shoot me, but don't take me money! ;s1e16_104 SpongeBob; We don't want your money... moon man! [both capture Mr. Krabs and toss him and Squidward into the ship] Look at them squirming around in there. ;s1e16_105 {system}; [Mr. Krabs and Squidward mutter disgruntingly] ;s1e16_106 Patrick; Eww, gross. ;s1e16_107 SpongeBob; Well, there's plenty more where those came from. ;s1e16_108 {system}; [Transitions to Mrs. Puff's Boating School] ;s1e16_109 SpongeBob; [at Patrick] Shhh... ;s1e16_110 Mrs. Puff ; [grading some of her students' paper] SpongeBob, what are you doing here so late? [captured] Whatever this is... [inflates herself and has a deep voice] ...it's going on your permanent record! ;s1e16_111 {system}; [Flats the Flounder is in the bathroom where he opens the mirror revealing SpongeBob inside, shocking Flats SpongeBob captures him. Incidental 33 is walking while holding an umbrella where she gets captured. Larry opens a mailbox and gets captured. Later, virtually every Bikini Bottomite is shown to be captured. Many of the Bikini Bottomites are complaining. Patrick struggles in putting them inside the rocket.] ;s1e16_112 Patrick; [trying to push the captured Bikini Bottomites inside the rocket] SpongeBob, I think we might have to make a second trip. ;s1e16_113 SpongeBob; There's no time for that! Just push harder. ;s1e16_114 {system}; [Off-screen, Sandy starts coming in on her jetpack floating down] ;s1e16_115 Sandy; SpongeBob, what are y'all doing? [SpongeBob looks at her Sandy is shown landing from her jetpack] I can't turn my back on you for two seconds without you causing a whole mess of trouble. Why look at ya, bagging up all your friends and neighbors just like they was a fresh crop of hickory smoked sausages. You done turned my little science experiment into a disaster. You two oughta should be ashamed of- [SpongeBob and Patrick capture her the two are then seen carrying her walking to the ship] ;s1e16_116 SpongeBob; Nice try, Sandy. ;s1e16_117 Patrick; Or should I say Ms. Alien Pants. [laughs] ;s1e16_118 Sandy; Aliens? Is that what this is about? [as Patrick giggles, SpongeBob and Patrick throw her into the ship] This isn't the moon! We're still in Bikini Bot-- [door is slammed shut] ;s1e16_119 SpongeBob; It just goes to show you: you can't trust anyone. ;s1e16_120 {system}; [Both SpongeBob and Patrick stare at each other, run off, and pump their guns.] ;s1e16_121 SpongeBob; So, you were an alien all the time and you didn't even tell me! ;s1e16_122 Patrick; I didn't even know! ;s1e16_123 SpongeBob; Yeah? Well, I got you now. ;s1e16_124 Patrick; Oh, but it's not you that's got me, it's... [Patrick catches himself with the gray netting as it turns out he had his gun pointed the wrong way] ...me that's got me. ;s1e16_125 {system}; [Scene cuts to the ship starting up] ;s1e16_126 SpongeBob; Boy, I can't wait to see the look on Sandy's face! ;s1e16_127 {system}; [The ship enters the surface but runs out of gas and stops on the moon.] ;s1e16_128 SpongeBob; Sandy, I'm back! [peeks out the window] Wow, Bikini Bottom sure looks different. [sees the Earth and realizes his mistake] Uh-oh... ;s1e16_129 {system}; [The screen fades to black, ending the episode.] ;s1e16_130 {system}; [Scene begins in Mr. Krabs' house. He is dancing around and singing a special birthday song that celebrates Pearl's birthday. He dances in front of her friends.] ;s1e17_1 Mr. Krabs ; [dancing and singing at Pearl's birthday party] Yar-har, Pearl's my daughter, I'll spit in your eye! Yo-ho, Pearl's a whale, and it's her birthday, yar-yar-yar! Ta-da! ;s1e17_2 {system}; [Pearl and her friends look bored. One of Pearl's friends lies her head on the table, in dissatisfaction.] ;s1e17_3 Pearl; Thanks for the show, Dad. Now can we open the presents? ;s1e17_4 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, all right. Presents for me darling little sardine. Here ya are. [places the present in front of Pearl] ;s1e17_5 {system}; [Pearl holds the present] ;s1e17_6 Pearl; Oh, you shouldn't have. What is it, Daddy? It wouldn't be those totally hip new flipper slippers all my friends are wearing, would it? Everyone wants them. ;s1e17_7 Mr. Krabs ; [feeling embarrassed] Uhh... they might be. ;s1e17_8 Pearl; Whee! [begins to unwrap present] Oh, you shouldn't have, yay, you shouldn't have. [sees the item inside present, suddenly goes from gleeful to annoyed] I mean, Dad, [holds up big boots] you really shouldn't have! ;s1e17_9 {system}; [Pearl's friends laugh] ;s1e17_10 Mr. Krabs ; Pearl, these are the finest fishin' boots available! ;s1e17_11 Pearl; Dad, you ruined me! [starts to cry] ;s1e17_12 Mr. Krabs ; But I got them for a bargain! ;s1e17_13 {system}; [The anchor house shakes from Pearl's screaming and wailing. Bubble transitions to the Krusty Krab, in Mr. Krabs' office. Mr. Krabs feels worried.] ;s1e17_14 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, what am I gonna do? I spent two whole dollars on these boots and now I'm stuck with them! ;s1e17_15 SpongeBob; [peeks into Mr. Krabs' office] Oh, uhh, Mr. Krabs, can I get my paycheck? ;s1e17_16 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBoy, me Bob! Come in. Come in, right this way, laddie! [takes him to Mr. Krabs' desk] Have a seat anywhere, but not on these beautiful priceless boots. ;s1e17_17 {system}; [SpongeBob sits down, but the boots are in his way, so he can't see Mr. Krabs] ;s1e17_18 Mr. Krabs ; So you want to get paid? ;s1e17_19 SpongeBob; Uhh, sir, I can't see you. The boots [leans over to one side and Mr. Krabs leans towards the other] are in [leans over to one side and Mr. Krabs leans towards the other] the way. ;s1e17_20 Mr. Krabs ; [pushes the boots aside] In the way? These boots never leave my sight! These are the most expensive and prized possessions I own. ;s1e17_21 SpongeBob; Wow, really? Why is that, they just look like any old ordinary boots. ;s1e17_22 Mr. Krabs ; Ordinary boots? These are the only official fry cook boots! Only the finest fry cooks in the world are permitted to wear them! Part of a tradition. And these boots were given to me by the most famous fry cook in the sea. ;s1e17_23 SpongeBob; Who's that? ;s1e17_24 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, uhh, oh, well, his name's not important, but he was famous, all right, don't you worry. ;s1e17_25 SpongeBob; I'm ready! I'm ready! I want those boots! ;s1e17_26 Mr. Krabs ; Sorry, son, these boots are far too valuable. [takes boots away] ;s1e17_27 SpongeBob; Hmmm.. I know! What if I give you my Krusty Krab paycheck? ;s1e17_28 Mr. Krabs ; [thinking about the sound of money] Paycheck! You got a deal-- ;s1e17_29 SpongeBob; And what if I paint the Krusty Krab for free? ;s1e17_30 Mr. Krabs ; [thinking about the sound of money again] You've got a deal. ;s1e17_31 SpongeBob; And I'll throw in a year's supply of French fry orders! ;s1e17_32 Mr. Krabs ; [thinking about the sound of money yet again] You got a... ;s1e17_33 SpongeBob; And... [Mr. Krabs stops SpongeBob from saying anything else] ;s1e17_34 Mr. Krabs ; Hold on there, lad! You're gonna give me a heart attack! Phew! [shakes SpongeBob's hand] You got yourself a deal. ;s1e17_35 {system}; [Squidward is drying off a glass, rubbing it with a cloth. He blows the glass for a final shine, and is proud of it. He suddenly hears the sound of squeaking.] ;s1e17_36 Squidward; [scratches head] Hmm... ;s1e17_37 {system}; [He then looks through the glass and sees SpongeBob dancing around wearing boots. The scene is now viewed from the perspective of Squidward's eye.] ;s1e17_38 SpongeBob; Hey, Squidward. Do you like my new boots? ;s1e17_39 {system}; [Squidward blankly stares at him, and blinks] ;s1e17_40 SpongeBob; Pretty cool, huh? Now, I'm an official fry cook! ;s1e17_41 {system}; [Squidward feels mildly annoyed.] ;s1e17_42 {system}; [SpongeBob bounces up and down in the boots, making them squeak, as Squidward watches. Then SpongeBob bounces harder and faster until Squidward's head is bouncing up and down really hard trying to keep up. Then SpongeBob leaves to squeak his boots around the Krusty Krab, including jumping, walking with the boots on his hands, and doing the moonwalk. Squidward gets more annoyed at this.] ;s1e17_43 Squidward; [blocks his ears, makes an annoyed grunt] That squeaking is gonna drive us all crazy! ;s1e17_44 {system}; [Later that night, Mr. Krabs is going to bed. Mr. Krabs is in his room, lying in his hammock and imagining dollar bills jumping one-by-one into a cash register like counting sheep] ;s1e17_45 Mr. Krabs ; [muttering] Arrgh. Money, money, money, money, money. 10, 20, 30, 40... [all of a sudden, the pair of squeaky boots jumps into the register. He opens his eyes] Wha? Who's there? [realizing there was nothing wrong] Heh-heh... [fluffs his pillow] ;s1e17_46 {system}; [Mr. Krabs rests his head on his pillow] ;s1e17_47 Mr. Krabs ; Back to countin' me money. [closes his eyes again and imagines coins jumping into the register] 1, 2, 3, 4, 5... [the boots appear again Mr. Krabs opens his eyes again] What the barnacle is that? Uh? ;s1e17_48 {system}; [He sees that the bedroom window is opening and shutting by itself, making squeaky noises.] ;s1e17_49 Mr. Krabs ;Errgh!;s1e17_50 {system}; [Mr. Krabs closes the window and gets back into bed, but notices the window has opened again. He walks back across the room to close it but steps into a hole and falls out the window, breaking the tip of his leg off in the process. He makes utterances of falling. He comes back to run up the stairs, and he enters back to his bedroom. This time, Mr. Krabs watches his step to avoid another hole.] ;s1e17_51 Mr. Krabs ; Errgh... ooh? [sees the hole] Careful. [shuts the window, but it won't close.] ;s1e17_52 {system}; [He starts shutting it with increasing force and speed until the window finally stays closed, grunting every time he pushes the window.] ;s1e17_53 {system};" [The window reopens again, and Mr. Krabs gives it the ""evil eye"" followed by a growl. The window immediately closes back. Mr. Krabs then starts to go back to bed, and yawns as he walks back toward there, but he steps into the same hole he avoided earlier and gets stuck there.] ";s1e17_54 Mr. Krabs ; Huh? [loses balance and breaks the tip of his other leg off] ;s1e17_55 {system}; [Mr. Krabs screams as he gets flung into his hammock and gets all twisted up in it. Mr. Krabs can do nothing but lie there with bloodshot eyes as the window makes squeaky noises all night, as if it is clapping at him. Fade to the next morning Mr. Krabs has his legs bandaged up as he drowsily walks to the Krusty Krab] ;s1e17_56 Mr. Krabs ; Arrgh, that was the worst night I ever weathered. At least I'll have some peace and quiet at work. ;s1e17_57 {system}; [As he walks up to the door, Squidward slams the doors open into Mr. Krabs' face] ;s1e17_58 Squidward; That's it, Mr. Krabs I'm taking my vacation now. ;s1e17_59 Mr. Krabs ; [muffled] What's wrong, Mr. Squid-ard? ;s1e17_60 Squidward;" I can't take [sarcastically] ""The world's greatest fry cook"" anymore! I'll see you in a week. [leaves the Krusty Krab] ";s1e17_61 Mr. Krabs ; That fry cook's making me a fortune. What could be the problem? [as he speaks, the camera looks toward SpongeBob] ;s1e17_62 {system}; [SpongeBob is shown with his boots on and is carrying two large plates full of Krabby Patties in each hand.] ;s1e17_63 SpongeBob; Hey, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e17_64 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob-Bob-Bob-Bob-Bob-Bob-ob. [Every time SpongeBob's boots squeak, Mr. Krabs stutters. SpongeBob walks up to Mr. Krabs, but he is so tall, all Mr. Krabs can see is his boots] ;s1e17_65 Mr. Krabs ; I... uhh, I see you're still wearing them boots. [points to the boots] ;s1e17_66 SpongeBob;" [raises his right leg] Are you kidding? I love them! [leans towards Mr. Krabs? face] Could ""The world's greatest fry cook"" do this? [runs in place fast with plates of Krabby Patties in each hand, spins around, and then kneels down while the Krabby Patties carefully land perfectly onto the plates.] ";s1e17_67 Mr. Krabs ; Well, I don't... uhh... I don't... uhh... ;s1e17_68 SpongeBob;" [standing back up] Or could he do this? [leans over to to his right side and sets the plate on the table without having to move his feet from his spot at all] Or this? [leans to the table on his left side and puts a plate of patties on that table, then goes behind the register and stands on top of the boat] And watch this, Mr. Krabs! [moves his boots around slightly, making them ""talk""] ";s1e17_69 Incidental 4 ; Yeah, I'll have the Krusty Special. ;s1e17_70 SpongeBob;" Could ""The greatest fry cook"" do that, Mr. Krabs? ";s1e17_71 Mr. Krabs ; I, uhh... ;s1e17_72 SpongeBob; And look at this, Mr. Krabs. [holds his breath, making the boots inflate, causing him to float. Then he levitates across with his legs stretched far apart.] And this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this. [SpongeBob zooms all over the Krusty Krab and does many different things with his boots until Mr. Krabs can't take it anymore] ;s1e17_73 Mr. Krabs ; [his eyes go bloodshot] [screaming] I gotta go to my office! [puts seat cushions over his ears] I can still hear it! [puts chairs over his ears] It's still coming through! The infernal squeak! [he repeatedly bangs his head on his desk] Those boots have got to go! And I need an aspirin. ;s1e17_74 {system}; [that night, at SpongeBob's pineapple...] ;s1e17_75 SpongeBob; [walking to his bed with his boots still on] Gary, these boots have changed my life. I'm never taking them off. ;s1e17_76 Gary; [goes into his shell and comes out with earplugs in] Meow. ;s1e17_77 SpongeBob; Good night, Gary. ;s1e17_78 {system}; [SpongeBob wiggles his feet, making the boots squeak one more time before going to sleep. As SpongeBob is sleeping with his boots on, Mr. Krabs peeks over his diving board and climbs down. He sees the boots, which inflate and deflate with SpongeBob's snoring pattern. Mr. Krabs then takes the boots off his feet and runs to the Krusty Krab, laughing quietly as he runs back. Some hammering sounds are heard, then a rooster crows as night fades to morning. Mr. Krabs now sniffs his money.] ;s1e17_79 Mr. Krabs ; Ah, quiet money. [satisfyingly sniffing a handful of money] Silence and money. ;s1e17_80 {system}; [SpongeBob suddenly bursts through the double doors, tearfully] ;s1e17_81 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs! ;s1e17_82 Mr. Krabs ; What is it, my boy? ;s1e17_83 SpongeBob; [crying, while looking at the ground] Oh, Mr. Krabs, I'm sorry! Sorry! Sorry! I'm sorry! ;s1e17_84 Mr. Krabs ; It's okay, son. ;s1e17_85 SpongeBob; [cries harder and looks up at his boss with tears streaming down his face] No, it's not okay! I lost the boots! Your valuable boots, it's my fault, I let you down! Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Ohh, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. ;s1e17_86 Mr. Krabs ; Hold it, boy! It's not the end of the world. ;s1e17_87 SpongeBob; Yes, it is! ;s1e17_88 Mr. Krabs ; Look, don't cry. I got some, uhh, some magic oven mitts! [holds up some oven mitts] ;s1e17_89 SpongeBob; [puts them on his feet, waits a second, then kicks them off] They're not the same! You were right. I wasn't ready for those blessed boots. [walks into the door, opens it, then goes into the kitchen] ;s1e17_90 Mr. Krabs ; Poor lad. [looks through the window and sees that SpongeBob is so upset, he has his head down... right on top of the hot grill] ;s1e17_91 Incidental 6 ; [touches Mr. Krabs twice, feeling concerned if Mr. Krabs upset SpongeBob] Excuse me? ;s1e17_92 Mr. Krabs ; I didn't do it! [sees Incidental 6] Ohh, heh-heh, can I help ya? ;s1e17_93 Incidental 6 ; Yeah, I'm ready to order. ;s1e17_94 Mr. Krabs ; [takes out a notepad] What'll ya have? ;s1e17_95 Incidental 6 ; I'll take a [squeak squeak]. ;s1e17_96 Mr. Krabs ; [becomes surprised] What did you say? ;s1e17_97 Incidental 6 ; I said, I'll take a [squeak]. ;s1e17_98 Mr. Krabs ;Huh?;s1e17_99 SpongeBob; [still in tears] I heard his order, Mr. Krabs. He says he wants [squeak squeak]. ;s1e17_100 Mr. Krabs ;What?;s1e17_101 Incidental 6 ; And a [squeak squeak squeak squeak]. ;s1e17_102 Mr. Krabs ;Huh?!;s1e17_103 {system}; [Mr. Krabs starts going insane, imagining everything and everyone squeaking] ;s1e17_104 Mr. Krabs ; Huh? [more squeaking] What? [yet more squeaking] Huh? ;s1e17_105 {system};" [He sees ""squeak"" as an item for everything. He looks at a clock with labels ""squeak"" and ""squeak"" and continuously ticks.] ";s1e17_106 Mr. Krabs ; [scared] What the-!? ;s1e17_107 {system};" [Mr. Krabs keeps thinking and hearing the squeaks, this time seeing an distorted menu with items that only read ""squeak"" multiple times. His eyes now start becoming red, visibly showing red vessels.] ";s1e17_108 Mr. Krabs ; I didn't write that! [utters a scared sound, continues seeing the distorted menu] ;s1e17_109 {system}; [Mr. Krabs recalls the squeaking from Incidental 6] ;s1e17_110 Mr. Krabs ; Who said that? Huh?! ;s1e17_111 {system}; [Mr. Krabs continues to see distorted memories that keep squeaking. The entire screen gets bleached out, as if to depict extreme insanity. He gets paranoia from a dripping kitchen sink.] ;s1e17_112 Mr. Krabs ; [scared] What?! ;s1e17_113 {system}; [He even imagines the dripping kitchen sink makes squeaking sounds instead of dripping sounds.] ;s1e17_114 {system}; [Mr. Krabs continues to see distorted memories that keep squeaking. Eventually he starts seeing visions of SpongeBob and his boots.] ;s1e17_115 SpongeBob;" [in Mr. Krabs' head] Could ""The world's greatest fry cook"" do this?... And this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this... ";s1e17_116 {system}; [Mr. Krabs' eye starts swirling as he imagines him speaking, engulfing his own sight with a blur of items orbiting inside his view.] ;s1e17_117 Mr. Krabs ; [snaps] Stop it! [two customers get startled by Mr. Krabs' scream] Stop it! [his eyes start contorting] Oh, oh, don't you hear it?! ;s1e17_118 {system}; [A few other customers in the corner had also witnessed the scene. They look at Mr. Krabs like he's crazy, while one of them blinks. Mr. Krabs appears mentally insane.] ;s1e17_119 Mr. Krabs ; Yes, I did it! I did it! I took the boots! They're here! Under the floorboard! [sobbing] Oh, please! Make it stop! It's the squeaking of the hideous boots! [throws himself onto the floor and bawls] I'm sorry! [lifts up the entire Krusty Krab and grabs the boots, with everyone screaming inside.] But I can't take the infernal squeakin' no more! [sees the ghastly boots, clenches his eyes that his pupils form an X, and lets go of the entire Krusty Krab. ;s1e17_120 {system}; [Mr. Krabs runs into the kitchen with an evil expression on his face and puts the boots into a vat of grease, which shrinks them, and he eats them. After that, he opens the door to the dining room, and finally lets out a long burp.] ;s1e17_121 Mr. Krabs ; [burps] The deed is done. ;s1e17_122 SpongeBob; [confused] Umm, why did you eat my boots, Mr. Krabs? ;s1e17_123 Mr. Krabs ; Because, lad, you didn't need 'em. It's not the boots, it's the boot-ee. I mean, uh, the person... in the boots. You're a great fry cook. ;s1e17_124 SpongeBob; You really think so, Mr. Krabs? ;s1e17_125 Mr. Krabs ; I do, son. [hands SpongeBob a stack of money] Here's the paycheck I owe you. [puts another stack of money on top of the first stack] Plus a bonus! [takes the second stack of money] Well, here's your paycheck anyway. [walks away] I need a vacation. ;s1e17_126 SpongeBob; Bye, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e17_127 {system}; [Fade to Mr. Krabs and Pearl taking a drive out to somewhere, with a campervan behind their boat] ;s1e17_128 Pearl; [lifts her feet over the side of the door to reveal her new shoes] Don't forget my new flipper slippers, Daddy! ;s1e17_129 Mr. Krabs ; Darling, I won't. [as he laughs, he hiccups and the squeaky noise comes out] Oh, no. [continues to hiccup and squeak as they drive off into the distance and the episode ends] ;s1e17_130 {system}; [SpongeBob is grilling Krabby Patties in the Krusty Krab kitchen until one of them suddenly levitates up from the grill and turns into a jellyfish. It floats out the window as the rest of the patties turn into jellyfish and do the same. SpongeBob follows them and flies out the window and turns into a jellyfish. He buzzes around Jellyfish Fields when he hears Mr. Krabs voice.] ;s1e18_1 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob? SpongeBob! ;s1e18_2 {system}; [Shows reality of SpongeBob at the kitchen. The grill is on fire, smoke clearly coming out of it] ;s1e18_3 Mr. Krabs ; Wake up, boy! You're burning me money! ;s1e18_4 {system}; [SpongeBob wakes up from his dream and screams. Then runs behind Mr. Krabs] ;s1e18_5 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs, what do we do? ;s1e18_6 Mr. Krabs ; Here, use this! ;s1e18_7 {system}; [Mr. Krabs hands SpongeBob a fire extinguisher. SpongeBob throws it at the grill and sets the fire larger than before. Mr. Krabs angrily looks at SpongeBob for his stupidity, as he realizes his error.] ;s1e18_8 {system}; [SpongeBob was very hot inside in summer-like heat, then tries to blow on the fire to put it out until a fireman comes into the kitchen with a hose] ;s1e18_9 Fireman; [imitating the sound of a fire truck] ;s1e18_10 {system}; [Fireman sprays SpongeBob with the water. SpongeBob enlarges and falls backwards, which puts out the fire] ;s1e18_11 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob, come into me office. ;s1e18_12 {system}; [Cut to Mr. Krabs office] ;s1e18_13 Mr. Krabs ; What's wrong, boy? ;s1e18_14 SpongeBob; Well, I... ;s1e18_15 Mr. Krabs ; This is the fourth time this week I've had to scrape you off of something. ;s1e18_16 SpongeBob; Well, I've been thinking. ;s1e18_17 Mr. Krabs ; We need to get you thinking about work. [stretches his eyes out] ;s1e18_18 SpongeBob; No offense, Mr. Krabs, but I've been thinking about giving up my cold industrial life in favor of a more natural and free life among the jellyfish. ;s1e18_19 {system}; [Mr. Krabs's eyes suck back in, and his eyes now stick back up as normal] ;s1e18_20 Mr. Krabs ; [laughs a very long time] Ah, SpongeBob, you wouldn't last even one day in the wild. This is your natural habitat. [shows the kitchen] This is your wide open range. [shows the grill] These are your amber waves. [shows the greasy fryers] And this [picks up a spatula from the sink] oh, this is your golden scepter, with which you rule! That's better than nasty old jellyfish, right, SpongeBob? [SpongeBob is gone. Mr. Krabs looks around his head.] SpongeBob? ;s1e18_21 SpongeBob; [walks out the Krusty Krab] I can too last more than one day. I'll show him. Aw, barnacles! [throws his hat on the ground] ;s1e18_22 Mr. Krabs ; [opens the doors] SpongeBob, wait! [sees SpongeBob's hat on the ground and screams, revealing the hat has been dropped] Oh, he'll be back, alright. He'll be back. ;s1e18_23 {system}; [Fades to SpongeBob's neighborhood. SpongeBob is now giving his stuff away to his friends. Shown on-screen is SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward.] ;s1e18_24 SpongeBob; And, Squidward, I want you to have my can opener. [gives it to him] ;s1e18_25 Squidward; And I thought this friendship would never pay off. [walks away] ;s1e18_26 Patrick; [teary-eyed] Are-are-are-are you sure you want to give me this mayonnaise? [shows him the jar of mayonnaise] ;s1e18_27 SpongeBob; It's all yours. ;s1e18_28 {system}; [Patrick holds up a bunch of phone books] ;s1e18_29 Patrick; A-a-and these old phone books? ;s1e18_30 SpongeBob;" All yours, old friend. [walks off and comes back with a case] Patrick, there is one more thing I want you to have. [Opens up a rectangular box that has the words ""Ol' Reliable"" on the front. A glowing jellyfish net is inside. Patrick gasps and pants with excitement as he throws the phone books away and picks up Ol' Reliable] ";s1e18_31 Patrick; Oh! O-o-ol' Reliable? [cries as Sandy walks up] ;s1e18_32 Sandy; Howdy, y'all. Hey, SpongeBob, you having a garage sale? ;s1e18_33 SpongeBob; No, Sandy, I'm giving up my material possessions to live in the wild with the jellyfish. ;s1e18_34 Sandy; SpongeBob, of all the crazy schemes. Why would you want to live among the jellyfish? They're cold and mean and none too bright. ;s1e18_35 {system}; [SpongeBob pats Sandy's helmet] ;s1e18_36 SpongeBob; Oh, oh, Sandy. That's exactly the response I would expect from someone who lives the sham of a life I once lived. I'm gonna prove I don't need all this stuff to be happy. [walks away] Maybe someday you'll wise up and join me. Goodbye. [walks behind a bush and takes his pants off] I won't be needing these. [drops his pants and runs away] Buzz, buzz, buzz. [His friends see SpongeBob's actions: Patrick clearly upset, shaking himself, Squidward feeling indifferent, and Sandy feeling concerned.] ;s1e18_37 Squidward; He took off his pants. ;s1e18_38 Sandy; I'll give him a week. [walks away] ;s1e18_39 Squidward; I'll give him eleven minutes. [walks away, throwing off the can opener at Patrick.] ;s1e18_40 Patrick; Patrick sad! ;s1e18_41 {system}; [At Jellyfish Fields. SpongeBob touches the Jellyfish Fields sign.] ;s1e18_42 Sandy; Here, Patrick, have a Krabby Patty! [whispers into Patrick's ear] There he is, Patrick. Say your line. ;s1e18_43 Patrick;" [reading off his script] ""Why, thank you, Sandy, I would love one. (take patty)."" [takes the patty] ""Too bad SpongeBob isn't here. These are his favorites. I sure wish he'd come home. (take bite)."" [sniffles. tries to take a bite, but throws the patty and the script away and turns to SpongeBob] I can't do it! SpongeBob! Come back! ";s1e18_44 SpongeBob; Patrick, I'm not coming home. ;s1e18_45 Patrick; I miss you! [cuts to Sandy waving hello, but in guilty manner because of set-up] Sandy misses you! Even Squidward misses you! ;s1e18_46 Squidward; [while throwing himself a party at his home] Whoopee! Ha ha! Yeah! Ha ha! Ha! Heh! Ha-ha-cha! ;s1e18_47 SpongeBob; I'm happy here. This is my home now. [Sandy drags Patrick away] ;s1e18_48 Patrick; No! SpongeBob! [later, SpongeBob comes in wiggling his arms and legs like the jellyfish] ;s1e18_49 SpongeBob; Hey, everybody! I'm back! I think I'm getting the hang of this. ;s1e18_50 {system}; [Jellyfish float away as the net is swung at SpongeBob, which knocks him down. Patrick, breathing heavily in anger, is ready to capture SpongeBob with Ol' Reliable] ;s1e18_51 SpongeBob; Patrick! What are you doing? ;s1e18_52 Patrick;" [eyes tearing] If I can't have you as a friend, I'm gonna make you a trophy! [Violently swings his jellyfish net once, as if to catch a jellyfish. He then shows a jar with a label on the front that reads ""SpongeBob - Friend""] I even picked out this nice jar for you! [shows SpongeBob the jar] ";s1e18_53 SpongeBob; Patrick! Go home! I'm a jellyfish now! ;s1e18_54 {system}; [Patrick swings the net at SpongeBob but SpongeBob runs away.] ;s1e18_55 Patrick; [war cry] ;s1e18_56 {system}; [After hearing Patrick's war cry, SpongeBob runs away and hides behind a rock but the rock is actually a giant snail's shell.] ;s1e18_57 {system}; Meow. [slithers away] ;s1e18_58 {system}; [SpongeBob flees from the roaring Patrick. Patrick continues making a war cry and then begins chases SpongeBob. SpongeBob then hides behind a rock] ;s1e18_59 Patrick; I can see you there! [SpongeBob hides behind a bush] I still see you! [SpongeBob hides behind another rock] You're gonna look good on my mantel! [SpongeBob continues fleeing from Patrick] Friends forever, SpongeBob! ;s1e18_60 {system}; [SpongeBob runs underneath an arch rock and gasps for oxygen. He spots Patrick underneath the rock on the top] ;s1e18_61 Patrick; I got you now, SpongeBob! [falls on the ground and misses SpongeBob] ;s1e18_62 SpongeBob; Patrick! No! ;s1e18_63 {system}; [Patrick runs after SpongeBob again as SpongeBob jumps into the jellyfish hive. Patrick tries to get the hive down with the net, but he can't reach it. He vainly tries to jump to reach the hive, to no avail.] ;s1e18_64 Patrick; Okay! So this is the way it's gonna be. I hope you're happy! [snaps the net in half over his knee and walks away, sobbing] ;s1e18_65 SpongeBob; Well, that's over. Back to jellyfish matters. [a drop of jelly lands on SpongeBob nose. He samples it] Mmm, jelly. [eats a lot of jelly as the jellyfish come back toward the hive] Ah, my jellyfish brethren are returning. [jellyfish buzz into the hive] Greetings, comrades! ;s1e18_66 {system}; [The jellyfish repeatedly sting SpongeBob and he screams. SpongeBob climbs out of the hive and runs as the jellyfish keep stinging him.] ;s1e18_67 SpongeBob; [feeling burnt out emotionally] Being a jellyfish sure is fun. Buzz. [rips off a bushel of grass] Buzz. [pushes a rock over as he uses it for his pillow] Buzz. [pushes the rock aside and gets cold. The blanket scrunches up, but SpongeBob pushes it back down. The blanket scrunches up again and SpongeBob gets cold] Hey! Eww, I'm itchy! Itchy, why am I so itchy! [takes off the blanket and reveals nine poison sea urchins] Ah! Poison sea urchins! ;s1e18_68 SpongeBob; Ow, ow, oh, itches. Ow, ow, itches. [Continues speaking in pain, and crawls on the ground to stop the itching.] ;s1e18_69 {system}; [Later, SpongeBob is walking home, back to Bikini Bottom, at night] ;s1e18_70 SpongeBob;" Buzz. Buzz. Buzz. [says ""Buzz"" fourteen more times as he walks up to the Krusty Krab door and sees a plate full of Krabby Patties on a table] Krabby Patties. [walks past Sandy's treedome, then he sniffles] Sandy. [still saying ""Buzz,"" walks up to his pineapple] What have I done? I had a great life and friends, and I gave all of that up. ";s1e18_71 {system}; [SpongeBob opens the door and turns the light on. Mr. Krabs, Sandy, Squidward, Patrick, and Gary are there to welcome him home] ;s1e18_72 SpongeBob; You guys are the best! I made a huge mistake. Please forgive me! ;s1e18_73 Mr. Krabs ; Ah, quit your blubbering and have a Krabby Patty. [hands him a Krabby Patty] ;s1e18_74 SpongeBob; Don't mind if I do. [eats it as Mr. Krabs places his Krusty Crew hat on his head] ;s1e18_75 Mr. Krabs ; And I'll see you at work first thing tomorrow morning. ;s1e18_76 SpongeBob; [salutes] Aye, aye, captain! ;s1e18_77 Squidward; SpongeBob, do us all a favor. [hands SpongeBob his pants] ;s1e18_78 SpongeBob; Don't mind if I do! [puts on his pants] Ta-dah. [hugs Squidward] Aww. ;s1e18_79 Squidward; Okay, that's enough. [everyone else hugs SpongeBob and Squidward] ;s1e18_80 Gary;Meow.;s1e18_81 Squidward; Could we please stop this? [everyone stops hugging] ;s1e18_82 Patrick; Patrick itchy! [everyone but SpongeBob starts to scratch themselves and crawl on the floor] ;s1e18_83 SpongeBob; It is great to be home! ;s1e18_84 {system};" [The episode begins with Squidward's house at sunrise. A clam crows like a rooster. Pan-fades to inside Squidward's house, where Squidward is asleep and hears noises. He awakens, revealing SpongeBob and Patrick under his blanket with a banner of letters that reads ""happy birthday."" Patrick blows a noisemaker.] ";s1e19_1 {system}; Surprise! Happy birthday, Squidward! [all three standing in front of a cake] Happy happy birthday! Happy birthday cake! [standing in front of a picture of a seahorse and Squidward has the tail] Happy happy birthday! Pin the tail on the seahorse! [surrounded by presents] Happy happy birthday! Happy birthday, Squidward! [run out of Squidward's house with confetti] ;s1e19_2 SpongeBob; Yeah! So long, Squidward, bye-bye, don't do anything I wouldn't do. ;s1e19_3 Patrick; Another year older. [laughs] ;s1e19_4 Squidward; [frustrated] It's not my birthday! [shuts the door and takes off his party hat] That's it! I'm moving out of this neighborhood! ;s1e19_5 {system}; [Bubble transitions to Incidental 49A looking at a picture of Squidward's house.] ;s1e19_6 Incidental 49 ; Absolutely, Mr. Tentacles! [showing the realtor lady as Incidental 49A from Bikini Realty on phone] I can sell your home in a heartbeat. ;s1e19_7 Squidward; Oh, that's great news, because I want to move as soon as possible. ;s1e19_8 Squidward;" Oh sure, there's none of that... [worried] Did you say ""neighbors?"" ";s1e19_9 Incidental 49 ; Of course! I can't tell you how many times I've seen a sale fall through because of bad neighbors. ;s1e19_10 Squidward; Neighbors. Uhh... ;s1e19_11 Squidward; SpongeBob! No one will ever buy my house with him living next door! Whatever a good neighbor would do, he does the opposite! [gets an idea] Opposite... opposite... ;s1e19_12 {system}; [Night turns to day then rooster crows everyone up. SpongeBob is sleeping, but is awakened by a loud nose. Then it was revealed that the noise is coming from Squidward marching outside SpongeBob's house playing a bass drum, a pair of cymbals, a set of bagpipes, and a whistle.] ;s1e19_13 SpongeBob; Umm, Squidward, why are you playing that drum? [Squidward stops playing] ;s1e19_14 Squidward; Drum? What drum? [puts the drum on the ground, punches a hole in it, and pulls out a wig] This is just my wig case! See? [puts on the wig, kicks the drum out of the way and frolics around] Come on, SpongeBob, tackle me! ;s1e19_15 SpongeBob; Squidward! You need bed rest! [pushes Squidward to his house as Squidward is blowing bubbles] I'll keep you safe until you're well again. ;s1e19_16 Squidward; Oh, I get it. You don't know what day it is, do you? ;s1e19_17 SpongeBob; Uhh, Wednesday? ;s1e19_18 Squidward; Why, it's Opposite Day! [SpongeBob is confused] You mean you've never heard of it? Boy, have you been missing out! Opposite Day is the one day of the year when you get to act different! Normally I'm stuffy, boring, [frolics around a little more] but today I'm silly and spontaneous! [giggles] ;s1e19_19 SpongeBob; Does everybody know about Opposite Day? ;s1e19_20 Squidward; Oh sure! It's a game! Get it? ;s1e19_21 SpongeBob; Oh, a game. ;s1e19_22 Squidward; Yeah! Normally, you're really loud and annoying, so what are you going to be today? ;s1e19_23 SpongeBob; Quiet and out of the way! Yaaaaaay! ;s1e19_24 Squidward; Yeah! Why don't you get a jump on it. ;s1e19_25 SpongeBob; I love... I mean, I hate Opposite Day. [giggles as he runs back into his pineapple] I'm not ready! ;s1e19_26 Squidward; So long, chum. [takes off his wig] And goodbye, Bikini Bottom. ;s1e19_27 {system}; [Bubble transitions back to SpongeBob's bedroom] ;s1e19_28 SpongeBob; [running to Gary] Gary! It's Opposite Day and I... [stops running] ...walk, don't run. And I'm gonna... opposite... opposite... I'm just gonna crawl into bed and do nothing all day. [crawls into bed] Too bad it only comes once a year, huh, Gary? ;s1e19_29 Gary;Meow.;s1e19_30 SpongeBob; Gary! Where?s your holiday spirit? ;s1e19_31 Gary; [barks like a dog] ;s1e19_32 SpongeBob; [doorbell rings] Company! I hate company. [rushes to the door] Who's there? ;s1e19_33 Patrick; It's Patrick! ;s1e19_34 SpongeBob; Patrick... go away! I never want to see you again! [giggles, but Patrick starts to cry] ;s1e19_35 Patrick; [sobbing] SpongeBob doesn't like me anymore! ;s1e19_36 SpongeBob; [opens the door] That's right! You're my worst enemy! ;s1e19_37 {system}; [Patrick falls to the ground, bawling] ;s1e19_38 SpongeBob; Patrick, you're not really not my friend. It's just Opposite Day! ;s1e19_39 Patrick; Opposite Day? Hey, I've heard of that! ;s1e19_40 SpongeBob; You have? ;s1e19_41 Patrick; No! What is it? ;s1e19_42 Patrick; Oh! Let me try! Let me try! [holds his breath and turns purple] ;s1e19_43 SpongeBob; Patrick! Patrick, breathe! ;s1e19_44 {system}; [Patrick takes a deep breath in and pants] ;s1e19_45 SpongeBob; Not that opposite. Let me show you how to do it the wrong way! ;s1e19_46 {system}; [Bubble transitions to SpongeBob and Patrick dance across the screen as both have their skin color palettes swapped. Gary eats properly from a table.] ;s1e19_47 SpongeBob; [eats from Gary's bowl] Meow. ;s1e19_48 Patrick; [sitting on newspapers] Meow. ;s1e19_49 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick both blow a bubble, but they blow themselves into bubbles, instead. Patrick pops] ;s1e19_50 SpongeBob; .kcirtaP ,yeH [forwards: Hey, Patrick.] ;s1e19_51 Patrick; .pu evig I [forwards: I give up.] ;s1e19_52 SpongeBob; !edis etisoppo eht ot teg oT [forwards: To get to the opposite side.] ;s1e19_53 {system}; [Both laugh in reverse. Bubble transitions back to SpongeBob's front door of his house] ;s1e19_54 SpongeBob; Say, want to help me do some work around the house, worst enemy? ;s1e19_55 Patrick; Nope. [smiles, both laugh] ;s1e19_56 Squidward; Nearly noon and not a peep from SpongeBob! [packing his belongings into boxes] I'm almost sorry I'm leaving! [laughs] Opposite Day. [hears noises from outside] SpongeBob, what are you... [screams as he sees both SpongeBob and Patrick destroying SpongeBob's pineapple into a skeleton] ;s1e19_57 SpongeBob; Hello, Squidward! Oops. I mean, goodbye, Squidward! Aww, isn't Opposite Day... [giggles] ...terrible? [laughs] ;s1e19_58 Squidward; [seriously angry] I'll tell you what's terrible... living next to you! You're the worst neighbor in history! ;s1e19_59 SpongeBob; Wow! That's the nicest thing Squidward has ever said to me! ;s1e19_60 {system}; [Squidward facepalms] ;s1e19_61 Squidward; [panicked] If the real estate agent sees that mess, I'll never sell this house! ;s1e19_62 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick look at the destroyed pineapple] ;s1e19_63 Patrick; Isn't it beautiful? ;s1e19_64 SpongeBob; On Opposite Day it is. ;s1e19_65 {system}; [Squidward drives up with a bulldozer] ;s1e19_66 Squidward; Out of the way, SpongeBob! [pushes the items on the ground with the bulldozer and begins to rebuild the pineapple house skull] ;s1e19_67 Patrick; Hey! I wanna be opposite, too! ;s1e19_68 Patrick; Yeah! Finally! Yoo-hoo! [dances] I'm Squidward, I'm Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward. ;s1e19_69 SpongeBob; Wait! It's not enough to look like Squidward to be opposite... [talking like Squidward] ...you have to act like him, too. Boy, oh boy, do I like playing the clarinet. I practice and practice all day long, but I never get any better. [normal voice again] Now you try. ;s1e19_70 Patrick; Okay. [takes a deep breath and continues dancing] I'm Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward. [SpongeBob dances along with Patrick] ;s1e19_71 {system}; I'm Squidward. I'm Squidward. I'm Squidward, Squidward, Squidward. [they both dance toward Squidward's house] ;s1e19_72 Patrick; Why, thank you, Mr. Squidward. [walks in] ;s1e19_73 SpongeBob; You're quite welcome, Mr. Squidward. [walks in and shuts the door] ;s1e19_74 Squidward;" [still rebuilding SpongeBob's pineapple] Oh, Opposite Day. Next time, it's going to be ""Go Jump Off A Cliff Day!"" [Hammers vigorously. As he is building, Incidental 49A drives up] ";s1e19_75 Incidental 49 ; Oh my! The house is even more beautiful in person! [walks up to the front door, knocks on the door. SpongeBob opens it] Hello, Mr... [looks down] Uh... Mr. Tentacles? ;s1e19_76 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] Yes, please come in. ;s1e19_77 Incidental 49 ; It's funny, I pictured you being much taller. ;s1e19_78 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] Yeah, everyone says that. ;s1e19_79 Incidental 49 ; Now if you want the sale to go through, you've got to tell me all the positive things about your house. ;s1e19_80 SpongeBob; [normal voice, to himself] Positive things! Opposite Day... [talking like Squidward] I'd love to. The floor creaks, the roof leaks, there's a terrible draft. ;s1e19_81 Incidental 49 ; Uhh... well, you didn't mention that on the phone. ;s1e19_82 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] Please, let me finish. The winters are harsh, the summers are brutal. There's a wild man-eating clam in the backyard! [Incidental 49A looks at him, shocked] Now, would you care to see the rest of my home? ;s1e19_83 Incidental 49 ; Well, umm, I'm not sure if I'm interested... ;s1e19_84 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] Nonsense! I won't take no for an answer. [laughs like Squidward, then stops] Please follow me. [both walk into Squidward's art room] And here's the worst room in the house. My gallery. ;s1e19_85 Incidental 49 ; [looks at a painting of Squidward] Oh my, this painting is very nice. [Patrick bursts through the painting] ;s1e19_86 Patrick; Thank you! [immediately, Incidental 49A screams and leaps up to the ceiling, hanging onto a beam] ;s1e19_87 Incidental 49 ; Who's that?! ;s1e19_88 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] I'd like to introduce you to Mr. Squidward. ;s1e19_89 Incidental 49 ; You're both Squidward? ;s1e19_90 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] I'm Squidward, he's Squidward. ;s1e19_91 {system}; We're both Squidward. ;s1e19_92 Squidward; Well, that's done. At least SpongeBob has been quiet. [sees Incidental 49A's boat and screams] Ahhh, no! ;s1e19_93 {system}; [SpongeBob plays Squidward's clarinet badly for Incidental 49A] ;s1e19_94 Incidental 49 ; Okay, I really don't want to hear another one. ;s1e19_95 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] Okay. [plays more] ;s1e19_96 Incidental 49 ; I really don't want to hear more, thank you. ;s1e19_97 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] I hear you loud and clear. [plays more] ;s1e19_98 Squidward; [bursts in] Stop! Get away from her! Oh, oh, I am so sorry, ma'am, I hope these two [turns to them] barnacle heads [turns back to Incidental 49A] haven't harmed you in any way. ;s1e19_99 Incidental 49 ; Who are you? ;s1e19_100 Squidward; Why, I'm Squidward! ;s1e19_101 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick pop up in the background. Incidental 49A's face slowly turns annoyed] ;s1e19_102 Incidental 49 ; [angrily] What kind of fool do you take me for? [to Patrick] He's Squidward, [to SpongeBob] he's Squidward, you're Squidward... I'm Squidward! Are there any other Squidwards I should know about?! ;s1e19_103 Gary; [with a pickle on his face imitating Squidward's voice] Meow. ;s1e19_104 Incidental 49 ; [shocked then angry] I'm outta here. [walks away] ;s1e19_105 Squidward; Ma'am, please! What about my house?! ;s1e19_106 Incidental 49 ; I wouldn't sell a house for you if you were the last Squidward on Earth! [walks out of the house] ;s1e19_107 Squidward;Wait!;s1e19_108 SpongeBob; [talking like Squidward] Don't... ;s1e19_109 Patrick;...Go!;s1e19_110 Squidward; [screams, runs out, and holds onto her leg and at the edge of her skirt, dragging him, as she is leaving] No! No! No! No! No! ;s1e19_111 Incidental 49 ; Stop! Stop! [she grabs her skirt] ;s1e19_112 Squidward; Please, sell my house! ;s1e19_113 Incidental 49 ; [frees her skirt from his grasp] Never! [gets in her boat] ;s1e19_114 Squidward; Don't leave me here! [falls to the ground, sobbing. Incidental 49A drives off] ;s1e19_115 {system}; [happily walk up to Squidward] Happy Opposite Day, Squidward! We hate you! ;s1e19_116 {system}; [Squidward seethes with fury, then gets an idea. He now suddenly smiles.] ;s1e19_117 Squidward; Let me show you guys how much I... hate you! [runs off to get a bulldozer] ;s1e19_118 {system}; [Squidward drives up with the bulldozer chasing SpongeBob and Patrick, they both scream and run away] ;s1e19_119 SpongeBob; [normal voice] Patrick, do you ever get the feeling that Squidward likes us too much?! ;s1e19_120 Squidward; [angry, still chasing them] Happy Opposite Day! [chases them down the street and laughs evilly as they keep running away, ending the episode] ;s1e19_121 {system}; [No customers are at the Krusty Krab as Mr. Krabs is holding a 'FREE' sign for the salad bar, Squidward is reading a ballet magazine and imagining his head on the dancers, and SpongeBob is wiping dust off tables.] ;s1e20_1 {system}; [Closer shot of Mr. Krabs holding a 'FREE' sign for the salad bar, attempting to retain his smile. Piece of paper flies through the open door of the Krusty Krab.] ;s1e20_2 Mr. Krabs ; Hmm... I just don't get it. If a free salad bar doesn't bring in customers, what will?! [Squidward is dancing] Squidward! ;s1e20_3 Squidward; Uh-uh... Yes, sir? ;s1e20_4 Mr. Krabs ; There's gonna be some changes around here. [Incidental 4 walks in. Mr. Krabs gasps] A customer! Welcome to the Krusty Krab! [runs up to Incidental 4 with a chair and seats him. Brings him back to the table] SpongeBob, cater to his every whim. And don't screw this one up. ;s1e20_5 SpongeBob; Aye aye sir! Welcome aboard, sir! Here at the Krusty Krab, you are the captain, and I am your cabin boy. You just say the word and I will throw myself in the brig! May I take your order? ;s1e20_6 Incidental 4 ; All I wanted was change for the payphone. [shows the dollar] ;s1e20_7 Mr. Krabs ; Yah! [jumps on it. Later, Mr. Krabs puts the penny away in his safe in his office and is with Squidward and SpongeBob] Now as you may have noticed, profits are way down this month. [pulls down a chart with zig-zag lines going down and his eyes sticking out on each side] We've got to think of a gimmick to bring in customers. [pulls the chart up] Do you lubbers have any ideas? ;s1e20_8 SpongeBob; I've got one! [takes out a tray with a soda and a pair of socks on it] A free pair of socks with every purchase! Or maybe 'Double Patty Midnight Madness'! Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! I know! I know! I know! How about 'mouth full of clams' day! Everyone who shows up with a mouthful of clams... [talks with mouth full of clams] ...gets a free drink! Huh? Huh? ;s1e20_9 Mr. Krabs ; Well, uhh, I was thinkin? more along the lines of live entertainment. [Squidward gasps] ;s1e20_10 Mr. Krabs ; The money? [Squidward is lying on the table] ;s1e20_11 Squidward; And I can see it now... your daughter Pearl, her name up in lights. ;s1e20_12 Mr. Krabs ; [Mr. Krabs looks at his picture of him and Pearl] Little Pearly... a star? ;s1e20_13 SpongeBob; Hoppin' clams! A talent show! I'm talented! I'd better call my folks! [runs off as Squidward and Mr. Krabs shake hands] ;s1e20_14 Mr. Krabs ; Squidward, you've got a deal. Make my little girl a star! [later, the restaurant is being redecorated for the show. Squidward is writing notes on a notepad.] ;s1e20_15 SpongeBob; Hey Squidward, what time am I goin? on? ;s1e20_16 Squidward; Going on what? ;s1e20_17 SpongeBob; The show! When am I goin? on the show? I have a great act! ;s1e20_18 Squidward; What talent could you possibly possess? [SpongeBob blows a big bubble which turns into a hippo. Then blows two small bubbles for the hat and cane. Both dance] ;s1e20_19 SpongeBob; Ta-da! [Squidward yawns] ;s1e20_20 Squidward; No one, not even your parents, would want to see that. [hippo bubble pops] What the people want is culture, not dancing bubbles. ;s1e20_21 SpongeBob; Ok, I get it. Don't worry, Squidward, I'm going to come up with the most cultured act ever! ;s1e20_22 Squidward; I can hardly wait. [SpongeBob runs off] Phew. The only culture that guy has is in his tennis shoes. [laughs] Tennis shoes. I crack myself up. [bubble transition to the night of the talent show where people are outside conducting interviews and people inside are talking and getting set-up] ;s1e20_23 Incidental 95 ; [Talking in the background] We are now at the Krusty Krab Talent Show featuring the finest talent in the town... ;s1e20_24 SpongeBob; [peeks out from behind the curtain] Wow! A full house! [gasps] There's Mom and Dad! They are gonna be so proud! [Mr. Krabs shakes Harold SquarePants' hand] ;s1e20_25 Mr. Krabs ; Hello, I'm Mr. Krabs, and I like money. ;s1e20_26 SpongeBob; I gotta get ready! [Squidward gets everyone's attention] ;s1e20_27 Squidward; Alright, people, listen up. Gather around everyone, chop, chop. [performers gather around] Now, you may be thinking this is your one shot at the big time. Well, it's not. It's mine. ;s1e20_28 SpongeBob; Hey, Squid! How about this for the show? [runs off and runs back with a tub full of water and the words 'Mister Absorbency' written on the front] The Amazing Mister Absorbency! [puts his finger in the water and absorbs it. Absorbs the water into his legs] Ta-da! [absorbs water into his head] Ta-da! ;s1e20_29 Squidward; No one is gonna wanna see you engorge yourself. ;s1e20_30 SpongeBob; [grabs Squidward's legs] Please, Squidward, let me be in the show! I'll do anything! Anything! Anything! ;s1e20_31 Squidward; So you really wanna be in the show? ;s1e20_32 SpongeBob; Oh, yes! ;s1e20_33 Squidward; Okay, you get to mop up afterwards. [hands SpongeBob a mop] Now will you stop bugging me? [walks off] ;s1e20_34 SpongeBob; So, this is what it feels like... the big time! With this mop, I shape my destiny! [show starts and crowd applauds. Squidward comes out and gets the cue cards that are in his tuxedo] ;s1e20_35 Squidward; Good evening and welcome to the 1st annual Squidward Tentacles Talent Show. Sponsored by the Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty, because no one else would give it a home. [Patrick laughs] Thank you. Our next act is living proof that nepotism is alive and well. [Patrick laughs again] Put your fins together for... [Patrick cracks up laughing very hard. Bashes on the table with laughter, shaking dinnerware. He falls off his chair] Put your... [Patrick laughs] Put... [Patrick laughs] Pearl. [crowd claps as curtain rises for Pearl, dressed in cheerleader uniform] ;s1e20_36 Mr. Krabs ; Hooray! My little girl is finally a star. ;s1e20_37 Pearl; Give me a K-R-U! [jumps up and down on the stage causing the crowd to fly up and down with her] Give me a S-T-Y! [jumps up and down again] Krusty Krab! [jumps up and down] Krusty Krab! [jumps up and down] Krusty Krab! [jumps up and down] ;s1e20_38 Mr. Krabs ; [He, Patrick, and SpongeBob's parents get tossed up and down. Mr. Krabs appears happy.] Now that's what I call talent! [Krusty Krab floor is destroyed] ;s1e20_39 Pearl; Thank you! ;s1e20_40 Fred; My leg! Ugh! ;s1e20_41 Squidward; [screams in shock] ;s1e20_42 SpongeBob; Hey Squidward, listen. What do you think? When I mop, should I go forward and back? No, no wait, side to side. [Squidward lets the rope go and sends SpongeBob flying up. Then he walks back out on the stage] ;s1e20_43 Squidward; And now, poetry. [walks backstage but peeks his head through the curtain] By Gary. [curtain opens. Gary is on a stool] ;s1e20_44 Gary; [clears throat] Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow. ;s1e20_45 Sandy; [with awe] Oh, he has such a way with words. ;s1e20_46 Squidward; [checks his watch] Come on, come on, Ginsburg, if he doesn't hurry it up, we're not gonna have time for the best act... me! [SpongeBob walks up] ;s1e20_47 SpongeBob; Squidward, should I use Mr. Cleanser or Dr. Clean? ;s1e20_48 Squidward; Yes. [audience applauds as curtain opens, revealing Plankton in a magician costume and a sign that says 'The Amazing Plankton!'] ;s1e20_49 Plankton; I, the amazing Plankton, with the use of prestidigitation... [turns his wand into flowers] ...will make a Krabby Patty disappear before your very eyes. [throws the flowers aside] First, I'll need a volunteer from the audience. [jumps onto a table and grabs the Krabby Patty from the Touppe fish. Runs toward the door, but Krabs stops Plankton] ;s1e20_50 Mr. Krabs ; Nice try. Your act's over, bub. [grabs the patty] ;s1e20_51 Plankton; You may win this time. Shi-ya Ka-zing! [he claps his hands and ignites into a mini-explosion. The smoke from the explosion clears and he is completely charred] Well, this stinks. [he walks off to the Chum Bucket and is booed. Mr. Krabs runs up to Squidward backstage, leaving a trail of flames] ;s1e20_52 Mr. Krabs ; Squidward! [Literally races towards him, like an over speeding race car] This show is a disaster! You're ruinin? me! ;s1e20_53 Squidward; Now, now, don't you worry, Mr. Krabs. I've saved the best for last, you'll see. ;s1e20_54 Mr. Krabs ; For your sake, I hope you're right. [bunch of spot lights gleam around Krusty Krab] ;s1e20_55 Squidward; And now, ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for. We've saved the best for last. Put your hands together for... [all streamers, confetti and purple, pink and blue balloons fall everywhere] the incomparable Squidward! ['Squidward Live' words blink in pink and green lights as the crowd applauds. Curtain opens and the background shows a canyon. Squidward dances with birds, accompanied by classical music. Then, the lights go dark and music becomes techno as Squidward dances weirdly. Makes weird noises as he dances after the first part of his dance.] ;s1e20_56 Incidental 4 ; What the...?! ;s1e20_57 {system}; [Squidward continues to make weird noises and dance weirdly. Crowd is booing and they throw tomatoes at Squidward] ;s1e20_58 Mr. Krabs ; I'm losin? money on this deal! [puts a $1.00 sticker over the free sign on the salad bar. Grins.] ;s1e20_59 Fred; It's worth every penny. [everyone runs up to Mr. Krabs with dollar bills in hand] ;s1e20_60 Squidward; You bottom feeders! You don't even know talent! ;s1e20_61 Crowd; No talent! No talent! No talent! No talent! [curtain closes as Squidward leaves in frustration and anger] ;s1e20_62 SpongeBob; Hey, Squidward, can I go on now? ;s1e20_63 Squidward; Yeah, show's over! [crown continues booing as SpongeBob walks out and mops up the tomatoes. Crowd gets interested in this and applauds at him] ;s1e20_64 Crowd; Hey, yeah. That's really not bad. I like that. Alright! [SpongeBob briefly stops mopping and the crowd becomes silent. He then starts mopping faster getting even more applause. He then leaves stage right and the applause stops. He peeks from where he left and mops the floor while leaving stage left which starts the applause again. He waves goodbye to the crowd] We want more! We want more! We want more! We want? ;s1e20_65 Squidward; They want an encore! [pushes SpongeBob away] Stand aside, SpongeBob! [Squidward jumps out and the crowd grows silent. He goes backstage and SpongeBob comes back out mopping and crowd cheers again. SpongeBob leaves stage left as Squidward jumps out again and the crowd instantly becomes silent again. Squidward is angry.] ;s1e20_66 {system}; [SpongeBob's arm gets a cheer, but Squidward's does not. SpongeBob's leg is shown then curtain rises and SpongeBob is mopping. Curtain closes then opens to reveal Squidward mopping and the crowd goes silent.] ;s1e20_67 Mr. Krabs ; You did it, Squidward! What a great show! ;s1e20_68 Mrs. SquarePants ; Oh, my son's a star! ;s1e20_69 Mr. SquarePants ; Who ever knew he had such talent? ;s1e20_70 Mr. Krabs ; I'll be needin? another wheelbarrow for next week's show! [crowd throws flowers at SpongeBob] ;s1e20_71 French Narrator ; Ahh, lunchtime at the Krusty Krab. Everyone is enjoying their Krabby Patties. [lights go off and sirens and red lights blare as everyone in the Krusty Krab screams and runs for cover] Huh?! What's this? [doors and windows are now metal] ;s1e21_1 Mr. Krabs ; Can you spot him, Mr. Squidward? ;s1e21_2 Squidward; [up in a crows nest with a telescope] Down there, sir! [a Krabby Patty is bouncing to the door] ;s1e21_3 French Narrator ; [gasps] There appears to be a Krabby Patty napping in progress! [Krabby Patty shoots a laser hole big enough for it to go through at the door] There can only be one culprit: Plankton! ;s1e21_4 Plankton; Finally, victory is mine! I win, I win, I win! [laughs] ;s1e21_5 Squidward; He got away, sir. ;s1e21_6 Mr. Krabs ; [devastated] No! He's finally stolen me secret recipe! ;s1e21_7 French Narrator ; Perhaps not, Monsieur Krabs, for it's... [SpongeBob tears himself into another SpongeBob and flies off] ...SpongeBob SquarePants! [later, SpongeBob peeks out through under the sewer with binoculars in his hand. Catches a peek at a Krabby Patty jumping through the crowd] ;s1e21_8 Cowboy; Yeehaw! [Plankton walks into a magic shop and comes back out with funny glasses on] ;s1e21_9 SpongeBob;" Have you seen a Krabby Patty? It's about this tall and... [looks up and reads the sign MAGIC SHOP] Wow, a magic shop! Are you a magician? One time, I saw this magician and he did this thing...anyway, and then he told us, ""If you believe in yourself and with a tiny pinch of magic, all of your dreams can come true."" [Plankton takes away Krabby Patty] ";s1e21_10 Plankton; Argh! I can't take it! ;s1e21_11 Plankton; Yes! And after all these years, I thought I was the master of torture. But that... that just wasn't fair! Here! Take the stupid patty, I don't want the secret recipe anyway. I guess my restaurant will never be as good as the Krusty Krab. You don't know what it's like to be a loser. [cries] ;s1e21_12 SpongeBob; Aww, cheer up, Plankton. I think you're a winner. ;s1e21_13 Plankton; [stops crying] Wh-what did you say? ;s1e21_14 SpongeBob; I said, you're a-- [a bunch of people run up and point at Plankton] ;s1e21_15 All; Loser! [Plankton jumps away from group and walks back to his restaurant] ;s1e21_16 Squidward; How does it feel to be the most hated thing in Bikini Bottom, Plankton?! It hurts, doesn't it?! I know! ;s1e21_17 Incidental 118 ; Yeah, and for running you out, we're going to make this kid honorary town rookie of the day. [puts a big donut with a ribbon on it around SpongeBob] ;s1e21_18 All; For he's a jolly good rookie, for he's a jolly good rookie, for he's a jolly good rookie... ;s1e21_19 {system}; [Everyone throws SpongeBob into the air.] ;s1e21_20 SpongeBob; [thinking to himself] I'll bet if he had just one friend, he wouldn't be such a meanie. ;s1e21_21 All; [as SpongeBob comes down, they stop singing] Which no... whatever. [everyone walks away. Later, Plankton hears a knock on his door at his restaurant] ;s1e21_22 Plankton; A customer?! [opens door] Our special today is chum... [sees SpongeBob at the door] ...balaya. ;s1e21_23 SpongeBob; Hi, Mr. Plankton. ;s1e21_24 Plankton; Haven't you degraded me enough for one day? ;s1e21_25 SpongeBob; No. I mean...I want you to come out and play with me. ;s1e21_26 Plankton;What?;s1e21_27 SpongeBob; Play with me. ;s1e21_28 Plankton; You know how to induce thermonuclear fusion? ;s1e21_29 SpongeBob; No, but I like to go jelly... [Plankton closes the door] ;s1e21_30 Karen; You're not letting him leave, are you? Can't you see? This is the perfect opportunity for revenge! ;s1e21_31 Plankton; Elaborate. [computer shows images of a Krabby Patty and SpongeBob] ;s1e21_32 Karen; Befriend the SpongeBob, then when the time is just right, take the Krabby Patty! ;s1e21_33 Plankton; Take the Krabby Patty? [runs back to the door] ;s1e21_34 Karen; Get moving, genius, don't let him get away. ;s1e21_35 SpongeBob; [Plankton opens the door] ...fishing with my friends at Jellyfish Fields. ;s1e21_36 Plankton; Alright, SpongeBob, I'll play your little game. ;s1e21_37 SpongeBob; Great! [SpongeBob grabs Plankton and runs off] Last one to the fields is a rotten clam! [now at Jellyfish Fields] So, I get the big net and you get the little net. [hands Plankton a net bigger than him] ;s1e21_38 Plankton; What happens after we eat 'em? ;s1e21_39 SpongeBob; You don't eat 'em, you catch 'em, like this! [captures a jellyfish] Like that. ;s1e21_40 Plankton;And?;s1e21_41 Plankton; Stingers?! [Plankton imagines ruling Bikini Bottom with a jellyfish that only he controls] All knees will bow to Plankton! Hail, Plankton! I win, I win! [end of fantasy while laughing] ;s1e21_42 SpongeBob; It's not about winning, it's about fun! ;s1e21_43 Plankton; What's that? ;s1e21_44 SpongeBob; Fun is when you... fun is... it's like... it's kinda... sorta like a... ;s1e21_45 SpongeBob; What is fun? Let me spell it for you. F is for friends who do stuff together, U is for you and me, N is for anywhere, anytime at all! ;s1e21_46 Clams; Down here in the deep blue sea. ;s1e21_47 Plankton; F is for fire that burns down the whole town, U is for uranium... bombs! N is for no survivors, when you- ;s1e21_48 SpongeBob; Plankton! Those things aren't what fun is all about. Now, do it like this: F is for friends who do stuff to- ;s1e21_49 Plankton; Never! That's completely idiotic! ;s1e21_50 SpongeBob; Here, let me help you. F is for friends who do stuff together, U is for you and me. Try it! ;s1e21_51 Plankton; N is for anywhere, anytime at all! ;s1e21_52 Clams; Down here in the deep blue sea! ;s1e21_53 Plankton; Wait, I don't understand this, I feel all tingly inside. Should we stop? ;s1e21_54 SpongeBob; No! That's how you're suppose to feel! ;s1e21_55 Plankton; Well, I like it. Let's do it again! ;s1e21_56 SpongeBob;Okay!;s1e21_57 {system}; F is for frolic through all the flowers, U is for ukulele. N is nose-picking, sharing gum, and sand-licking, here with my best buddy. Hahahahahahahaha! ;s1e21_58 {system}; [At the Krusty Krab, Mr. Krabs is looking through a telescope at SpongeBob and Plankton] ;s1e21_59 Mr. Krabs ; Arrgh, mutiny. ;s1e21_60 {system}; [At the Chum Bucket at night, Plankton is changing clothes.] ;s1e21_61 Plankton; And after that, we frolicked through the flowers, and then we... ;s1e21_62 Karen; Sounds like fun. ;s1e21_63 Plankton; Well, the really fun part was when we... ;s1e21_64 Karen; What did you do with the Krabby Patty? ;s1e21_65 Plankton; The what? [shows a Krabby Patty on Karen's computer screen] ;s1e21_66 Plankton; You can't rush these things, you know. ;s1e21_67 Plankton; What are you talking about? ;s1e21_68 Karen; You're going native, Plankton, look at yourself! [metal arm picks up Plankton and shows him wearing square pants like SpongeBob's] ;s1e21_69 Plankton;What?;s1e21_70 {system}; [cuts to Krusty Krab] ;s1e21_71 SpongeBob; Who knows? Maybe he's changed. ;s1e21_72 Mr. Krabs ; Who knows? I think you knows! [shows a picture of him and Plankton holding up the letters for FUN] ;s1e21_73 SpongeBob; He's changed, I tell you! [Plankton enters] ;s1e21_74 Plankton; SpongeBuddy! Yoo-hoo! [SpongeBob runs over to Plankton] ;s1e21_75 SpongeBob; Plankton-buddy! Let's go! I forgot this is a no friend zone! ;s1e21_76 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob, may I speak to you in private. [talking to Plankton] You won't mind if I set this here, will you? [puts a plate with a Krabby Patty on the table and pushes it toward him] ;s1e21_77 SpongeBob; What's this all about, Mr. Krabs? ;s1e21_78 Mr. Krabs ; He's a thief. Look at the lust in his eye, he's... ;s1e21_79 SpongeBob; Why can't you just accept our friendship? ;s1e21_80 Mr. Krabs ; He's just after me recipe. I'll prove it to you. [walks up to Plankton] Ah, you must be hungry after that long walk over here. ;s1e21_81 Plankton; Oh, yes, but I'm saving my appetite for some popcorn at the movies. ;s1e21_82 Mr. Krabs ; Uhh... suit yourself. [walks off then comes back to push the plate closer to Plankton. Uses a fan to get the smell to Plankton] ;s1e21_83 SpongeBob; We've had enough of your little tests, Mr. Krabs! [turns the fan off] Come on, Plankton, let's get out of here. [both walk away] ;s1e21_84 Mr. Krabs ; Maybe the lad was right. Maybe Plankton's gone straight... [plate falls down revealing that it was cardboard] And maybe scallops will fly out of my pants! [takes the boat and paddles to 'The Reef'] Hang on there, laddie, I'm a-comin! ;s1e21_85 {system}; [At 'The Reef' movie theater, SpongeBob and Plankton are sitting in the front row. SpongeBob is giving popcorn to Plankton as he is eating some himself. Then Bubble Bass comes down and sits on Plankton, squishing him] ;s1e21_86 SpongeBob; I sure like sequels, Plankton. [sees Bubble Bass in his spot] Hey, Bubble Bass, you're sitting on my friend. ;s1e21_87 {system}; [Bubble Bass meanly smiles and gets comfortable in his seat, and a squelching sound comes from Plankton being squashed by his butt] ;s1e21_88 SpongeBob; Hey, Bubble Bass! [throws some popcorn and Bubble Bass runs after it] ;s1e21_89 Plankton; Thanks for that, friend. ;s1e21_90 SpongeBob; Sure thing. ;s1e21_91 Mr. Krabs ; Listen up! [Mr. Krabs' shadow is on the movie screen. He clicks his claws.] ;s1e21_92 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs? [in the projector room] ;s1e21_93 Mr. Krabs ; He's deceivin' ya! Reach into his pocket now, and take what he's got! ;s1e21_94 {system}; [Everyone in the theater steals an item from the pocket of whoever is sitting next to them] ;s1e21_95 Mr. Krabs ; You too, boy! ;s1e21_96 {system}; [SpongeBob reaches into Plankton's pocket and takes out a Krabby Patty] ;s1e21_97 SpongeBob; [gasps] I can't believe this! ;s1e21_98 Plankton; It's not what you think. ;s1e21_99 SpongeBob; What is it then? Tell me what you see here! ;s1e21_100 Plankton; I... I don't see anything. ;s1e21_101 SpongeBob; [starting to cry] How can you not see it!? [groans] ;s1e21_102 Plankton; [beginning to tear up as well] Okay, okay, I see it! It's a Krabby Patty, okay? I couldn't help it. ;s1e21_103 SpongeBob; But we sang the F.U.N. Song! [clutches his stomach] I think I'm gonna be sick. How long? ;s1e21_104 Plankton; How long what? ;s1e21_105 SpongeBob; [grabs Plankton, holding him in his fist] How long were you planning on doing this?! [tears well up in SpongeBob's eyes] Tell me! ;s1e21_106 {system}; [Plankton puts his head down and begins to sob.] ;s1e21_107 SpongeBob; [the tears now dripping down his face] What?! ;s1e21_108 Plankton; [looks up at SpongeBob] All right, it's true! I tricked you to get the Krabby Patty! But then you showed me friendship! [the two look each other in the eyes] And now I realize... that's all I ever really wanted. ;s1e21_109 SpongeBob; [sniffs, then smiles, beginning to stop crying] Really? ;s1e21_110 Plankton; [Plankton grabs the patty and jumps towards the screen] No, not really. Being evil is too much fun! [laughs evilly] ;s1e21_111 MovieWoman; Oh, darling, I knew nothing would ever tear us apart. ;s1e21_112 {system}; [Plankton, who is running away, rips through the movie screen] ;s1e21_113 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs, he's gone. He got the patty. He won. ;s1e21_114 Mr. Krabs ; Ho-ho, no he didn't, boy! Don't you know what?s behind these screens? [reveals the fabric, showing the Krabby Patty squished onto a concrete wall] Solid concrete! [laughs] ;s1e21_115 {system}; [The Krabby Patty falls off, revealing that Plankton is squished on the concrete wall. Plankton groans. Mr. Krabs takes the Krabby Patty.] ;s1e21_116 SpongeBob; I'm sorry, Mr. Krabs. I thought Plankton had changed. ;s1e21_117 Mr. Krabs ; Don't blame him, lad. No friendship could withstand the allure of a Krabby Patty! Now let's go back to the Krusty Krab and have a fresh one on me! ;s1e21_118 SpongeBob; Aye, aye, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e21_119 Mr. Krabs ; Well, maybe on a discount. [Mr. Krabs flicks Plankton off the wall and onto Bubble Bass' jelly beans] ;s1e21_120 Plankton;Huh?;s1e21_121 {system}; [Plankton runs around Bubble Bass' hand getting chased by his other hand, being mistaken for a jelly bean. Plankton screams.] ;s1e21_122 {system}; [In SpongeBob's house, he is looking at himself in the mirror trying to look strong.] ;s1e22_1 SpongeBob; It's time to grow myself large and wide. ;s1e22_2 {system}; [He grows himself large and wide as he is saying it. He walks over to his weight, which is a pink bunny and a blue bear, and has trouble lifting it, but manages to get it over his head anyway. The doorbell rings and SpongeBob opens the door.] ;s1e22_3 Sandy; Howdy, SpongeBob. How's it goin'? ;s1e22_4 SpongeBob; Not too close, Sandy. I tend to get smelly when I'm pumping iron. Check it out. [shows off his muscles, but is still a weakling] ;s1e22_5 Sandy; Well, you're smelly. ;s1e22_6 SpongeBob; All thanks to my state-of-the-art work set. [shows all sorts of stuffed animals] ;s1e22_7 Sandy; Uhh... I don't wanna disappoint you, SpongeBob, but you won't see any progress with those. ;s1e22_8 Sandy; That is, if you want arms like these. [rolls up her right sleeve, and flexes her right arm, showing off a big, impressive bicep] Or these! [rolls up her other sleeve and flexes her left arm, revealing her other bicep] Or these! [shows off her powerful back muscles while executing a back double bicep flex. SpongeBob's arm wiggles in the air] ;s1e22_9 SpongeBob; Well, uhh, maybe I could use a little help. ;s1e22_10 Sandy; Well, if you want arms like mine, you just gotta follow my training program. ;s1e22_11 Sandy; Be at my place at 5 a.m. Oh! And you'll need a water helmet. [puts a fish bowl on his head. Bubble transition to Sandy's tree dome, where SpongeBob is trying to do push-ups] Come on, SpongeBob, it's only push-ups! Come on. Come on! You can do it! [SpongeBob is grunting at this point determined to get a push-up. His body cracks and falls down while his arms stay up] ;s1e22_12 SpongeBob; One. [acorn bell dings] ;s1e22_13 Sandy; [in a boxing ring with gloves on] Alright, put 'em up! ;s1e22_14 SpongeBob; [struggles getting his gloves up] They're up. ;s1e22_15 Sandy; Ding ding! [punches SpongeBob out of the ring. Later, Sandy starts up her exercise wheel with SpongeBob on it. SpongeBob pants while the wheel goes faster and makes him trip all over the wheel] Feeling the burn? ;s1e22_16 SpongeBob; I'm-fee-ling-some-thing! [launches out of the wheel and into the tree dome glass] ;s1e22_17 Sandy; Well, now that we've got warmed up, it's time for the arm-cruncher. ;s1e22_18 SpongeBob; Arm-cruncher, great. [looks over and sees two cement blocks slamming into the cement pedestal] This squirrel's trying to kill me! ;s1e22_19 Sandy; [walks up to the arm-cruncher with phone in hand] This is it. ;s1e22_20 SpongeBob; Hey, that's great, Sandy. Well, I sure had fun, we'll have to do it again sometime, bye. [hangs up] This working-out thing isn't working out. [his arms bulge in and out] Ow. Ow. Ow. ;s1e22_21 TV;" Hey, you! Wimpy, wimpy, wimpy! ""Oh, I'm a little peanut worm."" Are you too much of a wimp to work out? Are you a weakling built like a sponge? Well, now you too can have muscles. ";s1e22_22 SpongeBob;Huh?;s1e22_23 TV; With Anchor Arms! [puts a long pink blow-up item on his arm] They slip on like a glove. Just add air. [puts a plug in the arm's hole and pumps air into it] How big do you want 'em? [pumps air into the other arm] Normal? [puts more air into the arm] Veiny? And for the ladies... [puts air into the arm which makes it grow hair] ...hairy. [SpongeBob whistles as the TV puts up an image of a weak shark] I was a wimp before Anchor Arms. Now, I'm a jerk and everybody loves me. So order now, wimp! ;s1e22_24 SpongeBob; Wow, now that's a good idea! ;s1e22_25 Gary;Meow.;s1e22_26 SpongeBob; I wanna be just like him. Yeah, I've gotta get to a phone! [later, a big shadow of SpongeBob is walking down the road past Squidward, who is sitting in a chair licking a popsicle] Hi, Squidward! ;s1e22_27 Squidward; [with his tongue stuck to the popsicle while looking up] SpongeBob? ;s1e22_28 {system}; [Cuts to Mr. Krabs sweeping the outside of the Krusty Krab.] ;s1e22_29 Mr. Krabs ; [looks up] Huh? ;s1e22_30 SpongeBob; Ahoy, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e22_31 Mr. Krabs ; Mother of pearl! [hides in the Krusty Krab. Cuts to Mussel Beach where everyone is lifting weights. SpongeBob comes in and makes Incidental 24C drop a big weight on Incidental 24B and Incidental 24Q's feet] ;s1e22_32 SpongeBob; Hi, guys. [shows off his new muscles] ;s1e22_33 Larry; SpongeBob, is that you? ;s1e22_34 SpongeBob; [walking on his hands] Who were you expecting, Tiny Tim? Wait... wait... [flexes his muscles] They're big, aren't they? ;s1e22_35 Larry; Dude, you're ripped! ;s1e22_36 SpongeBob; [flexes out the words] Thank...You. I've been working out. Excuse me a second. [flexes more] Yeah. Anyone up for the... [flexes his muscles into drinks] ...juice bar? [bubble transition to outside of the juice bar] ;s1e22_37 Scooter; [to Incidental 18] I'm tellin' ya, he's huge! ;s1e22_38 Sandy; [walks up to them] Have you guys seen SpongeBob anywhere? ;s1e22_39 Scooter; You mean 'MuscleBob BuffPants'? He's in there! [points to the inside of the juice bar] ;s1e22_40 Sandy; Uhh, whatever. Thanks. [walks to the juice bar] ;s1e22_41 Sandy; Pardon me. ;s1e22_42 SpongeBob; Working out is my life! I remember when I used to look like that guy over there. [points to Incidental 35] ;s1e22_43 Incidental 35 ; Who me? [everyone laughs] ;s1e22_44 SpongeBob; I remember when I used to look like you, too. [points to Larry and laughs] But, that was a long time ago. ;s1e22_45 Incidental 6 ; Here's your drink, sir. ;s1e22_46 SpongeBob; Thank you. [tries to lift up his drink but can't so he stretches his mouth out to the straw and drinks] Yeah... ;s1e22_47 Sandy; SpongeBob? Wha-where'd you get those muscles? ;s1e22_48 SpongeBob; I've created my own workout routine that's given me amazing results. [his anchor arm almost slips off] Whoops! Yeah, I have never felt better. ;s1e22_49 Sandy; Heck, what's your secret? ;s1e22_50 SpongeBob;What?;s1e22_51 Sandy; Your secret workout. What is it? [everyone wants to know and looks over at SpongeBob. SpongeBob thinks of something nervously and quickly] ;s1e22_52 SpongeBob; Hmmm, well... I, uhh... first I take my hand and I do this... [makes armpit noises] ;s1e22_53 Larry; Are you kidding? ;s1e22_54 SpongeBob; Do these muscles lie? [flexes his muscles into a shape of a sponge. Everyone starts making armpit noises] ;s1e22_55 Sandy; I'm glad to see you found an exercise program that works for you. ;s1e22_56 SpongeBob; Yeah, your workout routine wasn't quite tough enough for me. ;s1e22_57 Sandy; Can't argue with those results. What you need to do now is put those muscles to the test. ;s1e22_58 SpongeBob; Uhh, what do you mean? ;s1e22_59 Sandy; The big Mussel Beach anchor tossing competition. It's today! Everybody'll be there! ;s1e22_60 Incidental 6 ; Here's your drink. [sets the drink on SpongeBob's anchor-arm hand and it sinks down] ;s1e22_61 Sandy; Hey, with those arms, you'll do great! ;s1e22_62 SpongeBob; Uhh, well, I'm not sure. ;s1e22_63 Sandy; C'mon, let's go. ;s1e22_64 SpongeBob; Right now? Wait, uhh, wait, Sandy. I don't think it's such a... [tries to run away but the drink is holding him back. He tries lifting the drink but is unsuccessful] Sandy, wait! ;s1e22_65 Sandy; Here it is-- the sign-in list. ;s1e22_66 Sandy; [signs her name on a piece of paper] Okay, Sandy... [cuts to SpongeBob struggling to lift his drink, then back to Sandy] Cheeks. ;s1e22_67 Sandy;Okay...;s1e22_68 SpongeBob;Wait!;s1e22_69 Sandy; [signs SpongeBob's name on a piece of paper] SpongeBob SquarePants. [Incidental 6 lifts the drink off of SpongeBob, which sends him flying towards Sandy, who puts the paper into the entry box] ;s1e22_70 SpongeBob; Sandy, wait...! [slams into a pole] ;s1e22_71 SpongeBob; Oh, great. Thanks, Sandy. [bubble transition to the competition] ;s1e22_72 Sports guy ; We on? Welcome to the Goo Lagoon 8th annual anchor toss competition. [everyone is getting ready but SpongeBob is nervous] ;s1e22_73 Sandy; Ready, SpongeBob? ;s1e22_74 SpongeBob; Oh, yeah. Great. No problem. [blows frantically into his Anchor Arms] ;s1e22_75 Sports guy ; Could I get some mustard on that? Oh. First up, Don the Whale. [Incidental 32 throws the anchor and it lands. A fish comes up to measure the distance] ;s1e22_76 Measurer; 200 yards. [the crowd cheers] ;s1e22_77 Sports guy ; Let's see an instant-replay. [another anchor comes flying in on top of the measuring fish and hits him] Amazing! Up next, Larry the Lobster. [Larry throws his anchor. The measuring fish runs away from the anchor but it follows him and crushes him once again] ;s1e22_78 Measurer; 210 yards! ;s1e22_79 Sports guy ; Here goes, Sandy Cheeks. [Sandy throws it up in the air and kicks it away. The measuring fish runs around trying to avoid getting hit by the anchor but the anchor crushes him anyway] ;s1e22_80 Measurer; 510 yards! ;s1e22_81 Sports guy ; Wow! Fabulous! ;s1e22_82 Sandy; Beat that, SpongeBob! ;s1e22_83 Sports guy ; Up next, SpongeBob SquarePants. ;s1e22_84 Crowd; [imitates the armpit exercise while others are holding up SpongeBob signs and chanting] SpongeBob! SpongeBob! SpongeBob! ;s1e22_85 SpongeBob; [tries to pull the anchor but instead he falls under the ground with the anchor and comes out and laughs] Just kidding. Just kidding. [everyone laughs] ;s1e22_86 Sandy; That SpongeBob is funnier than ears on an acorn. ;s1e22_87 SpongeBob;" Oh, this is it. They're all gonna find out I'm a fake. I can't give up. I've got to try. I can do it! I've got Anchor Arms! I'm no wimp, I'm a jerk! [blows his Anchor Arms over the ""JERK"" size, to which the anchors are now small, and the arms are incredibly ginormous] Yeah! [tries to lift the anchor again but when he tries too hard, veins grow on his arms, and some of the air in one arm goes into his nose. He tries to lift the anchor again, but the air goes into his left eye as the crowd 'ooh's. He tries to lift the anchor again and causes the air to go into his left tooth. He tries to lift the anchor again for the last time, causing the Anchor Arms to burst around his body, then explode. After the air blows off, the popped Anchor Arms deflate, floating down. SpongeBob then reveals his real arms hidden from inside his body] ";s1e22_88 Crowd; I think he lost. [the crowd starts chanting for Sandy] Sandy! Sandy! Sandy! [Sandy walks up to SpongeBob and taps her foot, disappointed. SpongeBob walks away, leaving his destroyed Anchor Arms on the ground and follows Sandy to the treedome] ;s1e22_89 SpongeBob; 96. 97. 98. 99. 100. ;s1e22_90 Sandy; I want 100 more. ;s1e22_91 SpongeBob; It hurts. [changes the channel over and over] 1. 2. 3. 4... ;s1e22_92 Sandy; I think we finally found an exercise for you, SpongeBob. ;s1e22_93 SpongeBob; ...9. 10. [his arm falls off] Can you get that? ;s1e22_94 {system}; [The scene begins at Squidward's house. Squidward is admiring his artworks and sculptures of himself.] ;s1e23_1 Squidward; [talking to a wax sculpture of himself] Have I told you how beautiful you are? Your tentacles, your nose, your eyes...a little lopsided. [takes out the right eye, fixes it then puts it back in place] There. And now that I've been immortalized in wax, I have conquered all artistic media. Come on, my precious reflection, smile! [Squidward makes wax sculpture smile. Then he hears a crash from outside and frowns the sculpture does as well] ;s1e23_2 SpongeBob; Hike, Patrick, hike! [both run in separate directions but SpongeBob has a big rock. Drops the rock on the ground and it breaks in half while Patrick blows a chess piece across a chessboard] You just lost three points. [climbs a tree branch] One. Two. Five! [flips upside down and blows a bubble into a shape] G-7! ;s1e23_3 Patrick; G-7? King me! King me! [runs into the coral branch and pops the bubble] I lose! ;s1e23_4 SpongeBob; But it's not Tuesday, Patrick. ;s1e23_5 Patrick; Tartar sauce! [Squidward peeks out] ;s1e23_6 Squidward; Hey! What are you invertebrates doing? ;s1e23_7 {system}; We don't know. ;s1e23_8 Patrick; Uh, yeah, Squidward, it's... [checks his watch but all the bubble soap leaks out when he turns his wrist around] ;s1e23_9 Squidward; Time to find some other game to play! [laughs] [puts soapy bubbles into his bathtub and turns on his record player, then gets in and takes a deep breath] Ahh! ;s1e23_10 SpongeBob; Now what? ;s1e23_11 SpongeBob; [picks up shell] Okay... ready! [throws shell into Patrick's belly. Patrick shoots it into the air] ;s1e23_12 Patrick; Go! [SpongeBob goes after it] ;s1e23_13 SpongeBob; I got it! I got it! [the shell flies through Squid's open window, knocks into Squid's sculpture, and it falls over] I got it! I got it! I got it! [Squid in the other room, hears a thump, but he ignores it. Sponge and Pat enter the room via the elevator] Remember, Patrick, finders keepers. ;s1e23_14 Patrick; There it is! [points to the shell that is lodged in the head of the wax sculpture of Squidward] ;s1e23_15 Patrick; Bonus points! [Patrick starts to walk off] ;s1e23_16 SpongeBob; Uhh, Patrick? I think something's wrong with Squidward. He looks unconscious. ;s1e23_17 Patrick; Don't worry. I know how to do this. [Patrick tries to give CPR, but his face turns blue and he floats up to the ceiling but lets out all the air and lands on top of the wax sculpture's head] ;s1e23_18 SpongeBob; Get off him, Patrick! [Patrick stands up] ;s1e23_19 Patrick; What are you worried about? [Patrick's butt is now imprinted on the sculpture's face] He looks better already. [SpongeBob and Patrick stand him up] ;s1e23_20 SpongeBob; But he still feels cold. ;s1e23_21 Patrick; Well, let's go put him in the warm. ;s1e23_22 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick bring the sculpture in front of the window with the sun shining through it.] ;s1e23_23 SpongeBob; Do you think he'll be okay? ;s1e23_24 Patrick; You know, you worry too much. [the sculpture begins to melt] The Patrick is here and SpongeBob I know a lot about head injuries, believe... [starts to drool as SpongeBob snaps his fingers] ...me. Hey, what's that on your shoe? [SpongeBob looks down] ;s1e23_25 SpongeBob; I don't know. ;s1e23_26 Patrick; It kind of looks like... [a liquid puddle of green goo is on the floor] ;s1e23_27 SpongeBob; No, no, that part goes here. ;s1e23_28 Patrick; Yeah-yeah, that's it, uh-huh. ;s1e23_29 SpongeBob; We're almost there. We can do this. ;s1e23_30 SpongeBob; This is working. [sculpture melts again] Patrick, this isn't working! ;s1e23_31 Patrick; Look! [eyes turn over] ;s1e23_32 SpongeBob; I don't know how to say it, but our old pal Squidward, he's... He's... He's pushing up daisies! ;s1e23_33 Patrick; Oh, I thought he was dead. ;s1e23_34 {system}; [Squidward comes out of the bathroom covered in talcum powder. SpongeBob and Patrick cling to each other and get scared] ;s1e23_35 Squidward; [screams] What are you doing here?! Well? Are you two trying to say something, or do I have to...? ;s1e23_36 SpongeBob; No, stay back! ;s1e23_37 Squidward; What is the matter with you two? ;s1e23_38 Patrick; Don't, don't hurt us! ;s1e23_39 Squidward; What are you two talking about? [he notices the goo on the floor and screams] Look what you've done to me! When I get my hands on you, I'll... ;s1e23_40 SpongeBob; [sobs] Please, Mr. Squidward's ghost! [SpongeBob and Patrick are bowing before Squidward] Spare us your ghostly anger! [Patrick is kissing Squidward's feet and sobbing] ;s1e23_41 Patrick; (as SpongeBob cries) Oh, yes, Mr. Squidward's ghost! Please don't haunt us! ;s1e23_42 SpongeBob; (as Patrick cries) We'll do anything you want! Just have mercy on us! ;s1e23_43 {system}; [Squidward suddenly gets an idea and grins evilly] ;s1e23_44 Squidward; Enough! Listen up! Squidward's ghost is feeling unusually generous today. He hath decided to spare ye a horrible fate. All ye must do is tend to my every whim, and tickle my fancy on demand. ;s1e23_45 SpongeBob; Does that include... ;s1e23_46 Squidward; Quiet! Now, do as you're told, lest ye incur the wrath of Squidward! ;s1e23_47 Patrick; [whispers to SpongeBob] I think they make a cream for that now. ;s1e23_48 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick carry out Squidward on his bed] ;s1e23_49 SpongeBob;Here?;s1e23_50 Squidward; Too hot. ;s1e23_51 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick walk a little more then stops] ;s1e23_52 SpongeBob;Here?;s1e23_53 Squidward; No, too wet. Keep going. Keep going. [SpongeBob and Patrick walk some more then stop at the aquatic version of the painting La Troupe de Mademoiselle Eglantine] ;s1e23_54 SpongeBob;Here?;s1e23_55 Squidward; Too loose, Lautrec. [rim shot] ;s1e23_56 SpongeBob; Too tired... [both stop where they are] ;s1e23_57 Squidward; Perfect. Hmmm, I feel needy. [claps his hands] Slaves, fetcheth me some nourishment. ;s1e23_58 SpongeBob; Only the freshest, o spooky one. ;s1e23_59 {system}; [Both SpongeBob and Patrick run off. SpongeBob comes back with grapes] ;s1e23_60 SpongeBob; A grape fresh from the vine, your ghostliness. ;s1e23_61 {system}; [Drops grape into Squidward's mouth. Squidward eats it while SpongeBob goes and gets a banana.] ;s1e23_62 SpongeBob; A banana peeled to your liking, your incorporealness. ;s1e23_63 {system}; [Squeezes the banana into Squidward's mouth, and he eats the peeled banana. Patrick comes back with a watermelon] ;s1e23_64 {system}; [On the ground, Squidward's head is shaped like the watermelon] ;s1e23_65 {system}; [Squidward spits out the watermelon] ;s1e23_66 Squidward; Enough of that! I want something else to eat now. Something that's very difficult to find. ;s1e23_67 {system}; What do you hunger for, master? ;s1e23_68 SpongeBob; Whatever you want, we'll find it. We'll find it. ;s1e23_69 Patrick; I found it. ;s1e23_70 {system}; [Squidward takes it and throws it somewhere] ;s1e23_71 Squidward;" Well, go find it again! [Patrick goes searching for it] SpongeBob, get over here. Now spin around. [SpongeBob turns around] That's better. Now jog in place. [SpongeBob jogs in place] Say ""flank steak."" ";s1e23_72 SpongeBob; Flank steak. ;s1e23_73 Squidward; I think I'm beginning to like this. Stop. [SpongeBob stops] Now, play me an elaborate song with this! [gives SpongeBob a tissue] ;s1e23_74 SpongeBob; But this is just a piece of tissue paper. ;s1e23_75 Squidward; Oh, my. Always having to have it our way, don't we? Oh, boo-hoo. ;s1e23_76 {system}; [SpongeBob blows through the tissue to try and get it to make music] ;s1e23_77 SpongeBob; I can't do it! ;s1e23_78 Squidward; Well, I hope you don't have any plans tonight, 'cause you're not allowed to leave that spot till I hear a song. [walks away. Day turns into night and into day again and SpongeBob is lying on the ground with the tissue on his nose] What's this? Napping on the job? You're supposed to be making music for me. As punishment for this insolence, Squidward's ghost commandeth you to clean out his back room. ;s1e23_79 Patrick; [comes back with the pie] I found it. [Squidward takes it] ;s1e23_80 Squidward; I'll take that! [throws pie in Patrick's face] ;s1e23_81 Patrick; Yes, your ghostliness! [licks filling off his face] This is fun. ;s1e23_82 SpongeBob; Patrick, are you ready for this? ;s1e23_83 Patrick; Yes. [SpongeBob walks a couple steps forward] ;s1e23_84 SpongeBob; Okay, let's go. Patrick, are you coming? [Patrick is facing the wrong way] ;s1e23_85 Patrick;Yes.;s1e23_86 SpongeBob; Patrick, it's this way. ;s1e23_87 Patrick;Where?;s1e23_88 SpongeBob;Here.;s1e23_89 Patrick; [turns around] Oh, coming! [both enter a room in the back with a bunch of junk in it] How are we going to clean up all this mess? ;s1e23_90 SpongeBob; It's easy. Just tear this wallpaper off! [tears the wall] ;s1e23_91 Patrick; [laughs] Oh look, you missed some. [SpongeBob picks up a book] ;s1e23_92 SpongeBob; Oh, let's see. It's a comic book, and look at this. It's the Origin of the Flying Dutchman. [shows picture in the book] It says when he died they used his body as a window display. Now he haunts the seven seas because he was never put to rest. Well, don't you get it, Patrick? ;s1e23_93 Patrick; We're going to go shopping? ;s1e23_94 SpongeBob; No! We're gonna put poor old Squidward to rest. [Squidward is laying on the couch SpongeBob and Patrick spit spitballs at him] ;s1e23_95 Squidward; Ow! What the heck was that? ;s1e23_96 SpongeBob; Initiation! That was part one of your ceremony. ;s1e23_97 Squidward; Ceremony for what? ;s1e23_98 SpongeBob; We're going to put you to rest. ;s1e23_99 Squidward; I don't want to be put to rest! All I want are those chores done. Now, did you clean the back room yet? ;s1e23_100 SpongeBob;Yeah.;s1e23_101 Squidward; Oh, really? I'm going to go check. [walks off. Opens door and screams because he sees Patrick and SpongeBob with a coffin] ;s1e23_102 SpongeBob; Okay, get in. ;s1e23_103 Squidward; Are you crazy? I'm not getting in that thing! ;s1e23_104 SpongeBob; But you said we could put you to rest. ;s1e23_105 Squidward; I didn't say anything like that! Now, get out of my house! ;s1e23_106 {system}; [Squidward pushes SpongeBob and Patrick outside] ;s1e23_107 Squidward; Now what? [Squidward sees SpongeBob writing on a tombstone] ;s1e23_108 SpongeBob;" I wrote, ""Here lies Squidward. You may not remember him, but he..."" [Squidward screams] Oh, hi, Squidward. Does this look deep enough? ";s1e23_109 Squidward; SpongeBob! Cut that out! ;s1e23_110 SpongeBob; Oh, look, the mourners have arrived. ;s1e23_111 {system}; [A bus with a load of people are in front of Squidward's house] ;s1e23_112 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, Squidward, we all came as soon as we were sure you were dead. ;s1e23_113 Squidward; SpongeBob, are you trying to put me in the nuthouse? ;s1e23_114 SpongeBob; No, just into this hole. ;s1e23_115 Squidward; [Groans then sighs] SpongeBob, I have a confession to make. [Takes off his night cap] ;s1e23_116 SpongeBob; [gasps] You're bald? ;s1e23_117 Squidward; No, I'm not bald! I'm alive! Now get rid of that tombstone and tell all your friends to go home! ;s1e23_118 SpongeBob;But...;s1e23_119 Squidward; Do it! ;s1e23_120 SpongeBob; [to the mourners] Go home. ;s1e23_121 {system}; [People get back on bus sadly] ;s1e23_122 Squidward; I'm not your master, I'm your neighbor. Now do me a favor and stop doing me favors! [walks off] ;s1e23_123 SpongeBob; As you wish, master. ;s1e23_124 Squidward;D'oh!;s1e23_125 Patrick; Boy, he really had us fooled. ;s1e23_126 SpongeBob; No, Patrick. He's the fool. He's a ghost in denial. He needs us now more than ever! ;s1e23_127 Patrick; You're right. He really needs to get up to the great beyond. ;s1e23_128 SpongeBob; Patrick, say that again! ;s1e23_129 Patrick; That again. ;s1e23_130 SpongeBob; No, the other thing. ;s1e23_131 Patrick; No, the other thing. ;s1e23_132 SpongeBob; [annoyed] No, what you said before when you... ;s1e23_133 Patrick; No, what you said before when you... ;s1e23_134 SpongeBob; Never mind! I've got an idea. ;s1e23_135 Patrick; Never mind! I've got an idea. ;s1e23_136 {system}; [SpongeBob gets annoyed again. Later, Squidward is reclining on his chair outside. SpongeBob is trying to blow a bubble big enough to get Squidward.] ;s1e23_137 SpongeBob; I can't reach him! ;s1e23_138 Patrick; Blow harder! ;s1e23_139 {system}; [SpongeBob blows a big bubble to consume Squidward. The bubble lifts Squidward gently from his chair. The octopus doesn't notice that he's floating.] ;s1e23_140 Patrick; There he goes! ;s1e23_141 SpongeBob; Isn't he beautiful? ;s1e23_142 Patrick; How high's he going to go? ;s1e23_143 {system}; [Squidward now sees he is floating] ;s1e23_144 SpongeBob; All the way, Patrick, up to the great beyond. [both he and Patrick wave to Squidward] Goodbye, friend! ;s1e23_145 Patrick; Happy trails! ;s1e23_146 {system}; [Squidward pounds his fists on the bubble and tries to yell, but his voice is so distorted by the soapy wall that unintelligible muffled noises come through.] ;s1e23_147 {system}; You're welcome! ;s1e23_148 {system}; [The bubble floats above the surface] ;s1e23_149 SpongeBob; He's on the other side now. ;s1e23_150 Patrick; Yeah. [Squidward is floating above the sea at Bikini Atoll island in a bubble] He's in a better place. ;s1e23_151 {system}; [Squidward moans in the bubble with seagulls flying around him] ;s1e23_152 {system};" [The episode begins at the Krusty Krab, where SpongeBob is sniffing a Krabby Patty. He then squirts a mustard ""checkmark"" on the patty and puts on the bun. Just then, SpongeBob hears Pearl crying like a baby. SpongeBob sees her and gets a pan and puts it on top of his head for protection from the tears.] ";s1e24_1 Mr. Krabs ; Don't cry, love. Daddy's going to make it all right. Calm down, girl! [a wave of water from the tears busts the door down, but SpongeBob pushes the door back up for a couple seconds, then the water comes breaking through the door and wipes out all the customers, dropping them to the floor. SpongeBob walks up to Mr. Krabs with part of a table around his face] ;s1e24_2 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs, what's wrong with Pearl? ;s1e24_3 Mr. Krabs ; Her scurvy prom date stood her up, boy, and now, she can't seem to find another. ;s1e24_4 Pearl; That's because there's only one fish in the sea is long, tan and handsome as he is. And that's him! ;s1e24_5 Mr. Krabs ; No, no, baby, no more crying. We'll get you a date. Why, uhh... I'll take ya! [Pearl continues to cry and an earthquake starts] Well, what about Squidward? [Squidward is filing his tentacles. Pearl cries even harder and makes the earthquake even worse] ;s1e24_6 Mr. Krabs ; Wait, wait. Here, take SpongeBob! ;s1e24_7 Pearl; Ahh! the fry cook? Do you know what that would do to my complexion? People would mistake me for a planetarium. ;s1e24_8 Pearl; I don't know. But I can't take him, daddy! They'll kick me off the most frequently pictured in the yearbook committee. ;s1e24_9 Mr. Krabs ; Yeah, they would. We've got to find someone else. Listen up! Which one of you lucky lubbers wants to take me lovely daughter Pearl to the prom? [everyone runs away] ;s1e24_10 Pearl; Just don't be late, SpongeBob. [sadly walks off] ;s1e24_11 SpongeBob; Oh, hi, Mr. Krabs! Are you talking to that dummy I made? It's pretty realistic isn't it? [holds up the left arm] I made this part out of... ;s1e24_12 Mr. Krabs ; Never mind that, boy! You're taking Pearl to her prom! ;s1e24_13 SpongeBob; Really? Oh, wow! Don't worry, Mr. Krabs. I am a prom expert! [now at home] Oh, Gary, I'm a prom failure. I couldn't even get a date for my own junior prom. ;s1e24_14 Gary;Meow.;s1e24_15 Gary;Meow.;s1e24_16 SpongeBob; What is it, Gary? What do you have? [Gary hides in his shell while SpongeBob takes out a magazine from Gary's shell. Magazine is 'Long Tan and Handsome'] Say, Gary, this magazine gives me an idea! [SpongeBob cuts through some black fabric then sews it up. Then he takes a shower and plucks his eyelashes to put in some new ones. Then he plants some seeds into the tuxedo and waters it to grow a pink flower. Now, he ties his shoes which are on stilts] Long. [pops out of a toaster as some bread] Tan. [licks his two front teeth that are braced up] Handsome. Okay, Gary, wait 'til Pearl gets an eyeful of this! [Gary hides in his shell. Later, SpongeBob's limo drives up to Mr. Krabs house. SpongeBob rings the door bell and Mr. Krabs opens the door] ;s1e24_17 Mr. Krabs ; Hello? [SpongeBob lowers himself by some sort of crank] What do you think, Pearl? Cleans up pretty good, doesn't he? ;s1e24_18 Pearl; [wearing a pink dress] Well, at least no one will recognize you. Now listen, SpongeBob, I just want to get through this dance with my social status intact. [SpongeBob writes down a list of what Pearl wants to do on a notepad] I want to go to the prom, get my picture taken, and I want to dance... [SpongeBob has a big list now] ...I want to drink punch with my friends and don't do that other thing you're always doing... ;s1e24_19 SpongeBob; Uhh, Pearl, we've got to get back to the limo. ;s1e24_20 Pearl; [claps] A limo! Why didn't you say so? [Pearl grabs SpongeBob and drags him out of the house] I love limousines! ;s1e24_21 Mr. Krabs ; Go easy on him, lassie! I can't afford to break in a new fry cook! [laughs and closes the door. Now at the prom where the limo is driving up, but the back wheels are flat so it is screeching on the road] ;s1e24_22 SpongeBob; [checks his list] Well, I guess the first thing we should do is... [flash goes off where the pictures are being held] ;s1e24_23 Pearl; Yay! My first prom picture! ;s1e24_24 SpongeBob; Uh-uh... our first prom picture. [Pearl sprays him with something that deflates his arm] ;s1e24_25 Pearl; Let's get this over with. [SpongeBob is having trouble getting over to the photo-shoot] Come on, SpongeBob! ;s1e24_26 SpongeBob; Be right there. ;s1e24_27 SpongeBob; Just a second. Coming! [SpongeBob messes up his footing and jumps everywhere and apologizes to everyone but eventually gets to the photo-shoot. He holds onto the curtain to keep his balance] Sorry. Pardon me! Here I am...! Cheese...! [curtain collapses on them and the photo is taken] That'll be a keeper. ;s1e24_28 {system}; Hey, look, it's Pearl! Hi, Pearl! ;s1e24_29 Pearl; SpongeBob, here come my friends. Uhh, go get me some punch! ;s1e24_30 Error: Could not extract speaker and replica from line. ; Error: Could not extract speaker and replica from line. ;s1e24_31 Pearl; Hi, girls. ;s1e24_32 Teen 11 ; I'd like you to meet Billy Fishkins! ;s1e24_33 Teen 1 ;Meep.;s1e24_34 Teen 14 ; And you know Brian Flounder from math class. ;s1e24_35 Teen 2 ;Meep.;s1e24_36 Pearl; Hi Brian. ;s1e24_37 Teen 11 ; So, like, where's your date, Pearl? We're dying to meet him. ;s1e24_38 Pearl; He's over at the punch bowl getting me some punch. [Teen 11 looks for SpongeBob] ;s1e24_39 Pearl; Oh, yes! [notices what SpongeBob is doing] I mean... Oh no. [SpongeBob is trying to reach for the spoon to get some punch, but can't reach because he is too tall, the spoon is alive. He misplaces his footing and gets the punch all over him. Pearl pushes her friends away] Oh, quick, let's go see how ugly Cindy's dress is! [SpongeBob hands two glasses of punch to some people] SpongeBob, what are you doing?! [SpongeBob has red skin now from the punch. He squeezes some juice from his nose and into the glass] ;s1e24_40 SpongeBob; Hi, Pearl! Come on, it won't bite! ;s1e24_41 Pearl; You look ridiculous! [gasps] ;s1e24_42 SpongeBob; What is it? [Pearl pushes him under the table but he gets up again] ;s1e24_43 Pearl; Get down, he'll see us! It's my ex-boyfriend, Octavius Rex, a.k.a. long, tan and handsome! ;s1e24_44 Octavius;Meep.;s1e24_45 SpongeBob; Whoa. But, I bet he isn't holder of the Regional Romantic Dance Championship trophy! [holds it up, but Teen 6 takes it away because it's his] ;s1e24_46 Teen 6 ; Give me that back. ;s1e24_47 SpongeBob; [giggles] That just didn't happen. Let's go! [takes Pearl to the dance floor] Ready? [dances like crazy] ;s1e24_48 Pearl; SpongeBob, what are you doing? Can't you see everybody here is doing 'the whack'? [the couples are jumping at each other with their chests. We see couples jumping up and hitting each other, so they do the whack] ;s1e24_49 SpongeBob; The whack? Oh, yeah, I invented that one. [tries to jump] ;s1e24_50 Pearl; Are you sure you can do this? [SpongeBob jumps at Pearl, but they hit another couple and send them flying through the food table, shattering food and kitchenware and they crash through a painting being painted by Norman Rockbass] ;s1e24_51 NormanRockbass; Aaah! [jumps into a trash can which makes everyone else scream and go crazy] ;s1e24_52 Pearl; Well, I guess you can take me home now. Now that you've ruined everything! [cries] ;s1e24_53 SpongeBob; Don't cry, the prom expert is here! I haven't failed yet! [looks through the list he wrote down] Hey, we can still... no, I broke that. I know! We could... no. Don't cry! D-d-d-d-don't, don't cry. [At this point, SpongeBob seems to be talking to himself more than he is to Pearl.] Whatever you do, don't... [cries, runs off] ;s1e24_54 Teen 14 ; Wow, what did you do to him? Poor little guy. [SpongeBob runs into the ladies' bathroom. A couple girls run off screaming] ;s1e24_55 Pearl; [walks up outside the ladies restroom] Sponge, are you okay? ;s1e24_56 SpongeBob; [crying] ? Messed everything up. ;s1e24_57 Pearl; Don't worry, SpongeBob, ya didn't mess everything up. ;s1e24_58 SpongeBob; [crying] ? Hot dog! ;s1e24_59 Pearl; Actually, it was pretty funny when that hot dog landed in Judy's hair. ;s1e24_60 SpongeBob; [crying] All I wanted was to have a good time! ;s1e24_61 Pearl; But I am having a good time! Ya know, we haven't finished our dance yet. ;s1e24_62 SpongeBob; [whimpers] Can I still wear the wig? ;s1e24_63 Pearl; Yes, you can still wear the wig. [SpongeBob runs out and grabs Pearl to the dance floor] ;s1e24_64 Error: Could not extract speaker and replica from line. ; Error: Could not extract speaker and replica from line. ;s1e24_65 AngryCrowd; Get out! ;s1e24_66 AngryCrowd; After all the hard work we put in on the decorations, they think they can just come in and ruin it? ;s1e24_67 Teen 5 ; Go wreck someone else's prom, will ya? [Goes back inside gym. Later, SpongeBob and Pearl walking up to her house] ;s1e24_68 Pearl; Oh, don't worry, SpongeBob, I knew it would be a total disaster all along. But as far as disasters go, that was really fun. [Mr. Krabs opens up the door] ;s1e24_69 Mr. Krabs ; A-ha! Keep away from me precious little flower! [Pearl gasps] You almost stepped on it. [rakes the flower in the ground. SpongeBob froze in his spot] ;s1e24_70 Pearl; Oh, daddy! Well, good night, short, yellow and spongy. SpongeBob? [shrugs her shoulders and walks back inside] ;s1e24_71 Mr. Krabs ; Good job, laddie. [winks at him and goes back inside. The real SpongeBob appears from the side] ;s1e24_72 SpongeBob; Oh, there you are, dummy. You sure come in handy. [laughs] [The scene then shows Bikini Atoll at night, ending the episode.] ;s1e24_73 {system}; [The episode begins at the Krusty Krab.] ;s1e25_1 SpongeBob; Hey, Squidward? Hey, Squidward? [Squidward is reading a book.] Hey, Squidward? Hey, Squidward? Hey, Squidward? ;s1e25_2 Squidward; All right, I'll bite. What is it, SpongeBob? ;s1e25_3 SpongeBob; Do you know what today is? ;s1e25_4 Squidward; Annoy Squidward Day? ;s1e25_5 SpongeBob; [laughs] No, silly! [gets out a calendar] That's on the 15th! [day is marked by a picture of Squidward's face] Today is the beginning of the judging for Employee of the Month. ;s1e25_6 Squidward; SpongeBob, don't you know that award's a scam? ;s1e25_7 SpongeBob; What do you mean? ;s1e25_8 SpongeBob; That is not true, Squidward. He gives it to me because I work harder. You could win it too if you tried harder. ;s1e25_9 Squidward; Oh, for what? To get my face on the Wall of Shame? [shows wall full of SpongeBob pictures for being Employee of the Month] ;s1e25_10 SpongeBob; Squidward, you've got it all wrong. Having pride in your work is nothing to be ashamed of, why it's the only thing that makes it all worthwhile. ;s1e25_11 SpongeBob;" [In mind] Huh? [looks over and sees the month of ""January"" with no picture] ";s1e25_12 Squidward; That's right, SpongeBob. I might sneak up on you. [Squidward and Mr. Krabs laugh at SpongeBob as he walks over to the wall and imagines Squidward laughing at him in the picture] ;s1e25_13 SpongeBob; No...! [begins to cry] How could I have let the quality of my work slip so much?! [Squidward's picture continues to laugh until it becomes an evil cackle. The scene goes to SpongeBob grilling and flipping patties until he comes to a patty that won't flip. He tries and tries, but then he flips the patty on to the ceiling. He screams and then tries to get it off of there.] ;s1e25_14 Squidward; [peeks in] Need some help? [SpongeBob screams again] What are you doing? ;s1e25_15 Squidward; You're losing it! Don't you know that award is a load of-- [SpongeBob gets the patty off the ceiling, but he flings it into the fan and it sprays Squidward with all the meat] ...garbage. ;s1e25_16 SpongeBob; [jumps off of ceiling] Please don't tell Mr. Krabs about this! It'll hurt my chances of winning the award! ;s1e25_17 Squidward; I already told you, that award is a bunch of... [gets sprayed with meat again] ...baloney! ;s1e25_18 SpongeBob; That is not true, Squidward. Like this hat, that award is a symbol of... ;s1e25_19 Squidward; [grabs SpongeBob's hat] It's a symbol that you're a chump! [SpongeBob screams for the 3rd time, feeling scared] ;s1e25_20 SpongeBob; No, Squidward! [screams] ;s1e25_21 Squidward; And this is a symbol of what I think of the 'Employee of the Month' award! [Squidward lifts his foot and tries to stomp the hat flat, but his foot hits something hard that is under the hat] Ow! ;s1e25_22 SpongeBob; [lifts up the hat to reveal a lead block] An experienced employee of the month always keeps a brick of lead in his hat. ;s1e25_23 Squidward; I'm telling you for the last time, that award is nothing but a joke! [Squidward walks away, but is sprayed with meat for the last time. Then we see SpongeBob looking at all his award photos] ;s1e25_24 SpongeBob; What if Squidward's right? What if the award is a phony? Does this mean my whole body of work is meaningless?! [every award photo now has an army hat on] ;s1e25_25 {system}; Stow that kind of talk, sailor! This is war now, private! That's exactly what he wants you to think! This is no time to go lily-livered on us! ;s1e25_26 SpongeBob; But, sir? ;s1e25_27 SpongeBob; Crystal, sir! ;s1e25_28 SpongeBob; I won't let Squidward win! [Squidward sets his alarm and walks off] He can't go to work if he doesn't wake up. Target sited. [SpongeBob sneaks up to Squidward's house by sliding on the ground then through one of Squidward's windows and as he enters he falls to the ground and Squidward's hears the noise while he is brushing his teeth. Squidward goes to check what it is and SpongeBob is standing behind the plant by the door. Squidward closes the door and SpongeBob slides around the door and then by Squidward's bed where the alarm clock is. He is about to grab it when he hears the door handle jiggle so he hides in the pillow on the bed. Squidward gets into bed and isn't comfortable with the pillow as it is so he adjusts it. Tries to adjust it again and you can hear SpongeBob's giggling. Squidward lays his head down and SpongeBob's hand reaches out for the clock as Squidward opens his eyes. Squidward freaks out and throws the pillow against the wall. The cover comes down, revealing SpongeBob] ;s1e25_29 SpongeBob; You can't win that award if you don't get up for work! [SpongeBob destroys the clock. Squidward grabs another one and sets it on the stand. SpongeBob grabs that one and destroys it. Squidward opens up a closet full of alarm clocks. SpongeBob grabs a few clocks and destroys them one by one] ;s1e25_30 Squidward; Stop it, SpongeBob! If I really wanted that award, I could win it with my tentacles tied! ;s1e25_31 SpongeBob; [tosses the destroyed alarm clock over his shoulder] That can be arranged. ;s1e25_32 Squidward; You're a lunatic, SpongeBob! ;s1e25_33 SpongeBob; Maybe so, but I did win 'Employee of the Month' 26 months in a row. ;s1e25_34 Squidward; Are y-Are you trying to say that you are better than me?! ;s1e25_35 SpongeBob; I've been better than you for 26 months--and it'll be 27 tomorrow. ;s1e25_36 Squidward; Oh, that's it, square-for-brains! That's it! I'm gonna show you how easy it is to win that award. I'm gonna be the new 'Employee of the Month'! I will prove to you that I am far more competent than you! ;s1e25_37 SpongeBob; Well, I'm going in early to wax the floors! ;s1e25_38 SpongeBob; Well, you'll have to get up pretty early to get there before me! ;s1e25_39 Squidward; I don't need to sleep! Loser! ;s1e25_40 SpongeBob; Well, me neither! ?26-time loser! [SpongeBob and Squidward are watching each other through their windows] Look at him. Watchin' me. ;s1e25_41 Squidward; I'm watching you, SpongeBob. You're not leaving before me. ;s1e25_42 SpongeBob; Hey, Squidward, getting sleepy, huh? ;s1e25_43 Squidward; No, how about you? ;s1e25_44 SpongeBob;" Nope! [Squidward gets out his clarinet and plays ""Brahms' Lullaby."" SpongeBob struggles to keep himself awake.] Nighty Night. [SpongeBob falls asleep and starts to snore. Later, Squidward tries to walk out, but falls into a very deep square hole right in front of his door] ";s1e25_45 Squidward; SpongeBob! [SpongeBob comes up with a shovel in his hand] ;s1e25_46 SpongeBob; Hey, Squidward! Going somewhere? ;s1e25_47 Squidward; I'm going to wring you dry when I get outta here! Now get me outta here! ;s1e25_48 SpongeBob; All right, Squidward. I'll stop by after work! ;s1e25_49 Squidward; SpongeBob! SpongeBob! [Squidward screams some more. SpongeBob walks back to bed] ;s1e25_50 SpongeBob; Now to get some rest. Don't wanna look tired for my 'Employee of the Month' photo! [SpongeBob goes to his bed and sleeps a while. Squidward manages to climb out of the hole SpongeBob wakes up to hear some hammering] Squidward! [Squidward is nailing boards onto SpongeBob's front door] ;s1e25_51 Squidward; That oughta hold him! [SpongeBob saws around it and pushes the door on Squidward and runs away. A cage drops enclosing SpongeBob and Squidward laughs. SpongeBob slides out because he can fit through the bars] ;s1e25_52 Squidward;" [walks along into a bottle and gets trapped] SpongeBob! Why, you little?! [SpongeBob writes ""loser."" on the bottle with his finger in a script writing and runs away. Later he sees a Krabby Patty] ";s1e25_53 SpongeBob; Ha ha ha ha ha. Hmmm, a Krabby Patty! [smells it but the top bun opens up and a claw comes out grabbing SpongeBob's nose] Yow! Squidward! ;s1e25_54 Squidward; So long, Sponge loser! [Squidward gets caught in a net and SpongeBob runs by laughing. SpongeBob runs through a barbed-wire fence and Squidward runs by laughing. Squidward is tied by his tentacles and SpongeBob runs by laughing. SpongeBob is stuck in a brick wall and Squidward runs by laughing. Later the two are trying to drag along some big items. SpongeBob is dragging an anchor and Squidward is dragging a flaming boat] SpongeBob? Truce? [both wave a white flag] ;s1e25_55 SpongeBob;Truce.;s1e25_56 Squidward; SpongeBob, I can't take it anymore. If we keep this up, neither of us will win the award! ;s1e25_57 SpongeBob; You're right. We should save our energy for work where we really need it. [it?s now dawn] ;s1e25_58 Squidward; Okay, let's have a good clean fight. ;s1e25_59 SpongeBob; And may the better man win. [shakes hands with Squidward, now he's thinking] He's nothing but a lying, boneless, ink-squirting, big-nosed phony. ;s1e25_60 Squidward; [thinking] Look at that bucktooth, corn-fed smile, you can't trust him as far as you can throw him. ;s1e25_61 SpongeBob; [thinking] As soon as he stops shaking my hand, ;s1e25_62 Squidward; [thinking] I'm gonna make a run for it. ;s1e25_63 Mr. Krabs ; Money, money, gonna make some money! [sees SpongeBob and Squidward come running over] Ah, it warms me wallet to see me employees coming in so early. Boys, you're early! [Mr. Krabs realizes that they aren't stopping for anything] Wait! [both push Mr. Krabs out of the way and start doing nice stuff] ;s1e25_64 Squidward; Clean tables, Mr. Krabs! [Squidward presses too hard on the table while he is cleaning and breaks it in half] ;s1e25_65 Mr. Krabs ; What's going on here?! [SpongeBob drops and breaks the dishes and mops them just like that] ;s1e25_66 SpongeBob; It's much more efficient to clean dishes this way, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e25_67 Squidward; Flowers and chocolate for you, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e25_68 SpongeBob; Look, I'm putting my own money in the register, Mr. Krabs! [SpongeBob puts his money into the register. Squidward and SpongeBob are in the kitchen] Two spatulas to increase productivity, Mr. Krabs! Faster, SpongeBob, faster! ;s1e25_69 Squidward; There's nothing to this patty flipping, Mr. Krabs! I'll easily double your output, SpongeHog! ;s1e25_70 Mr. Krabs ; Boys, boys, boys! [music gradually speeds up both SpongeBob and Squidward make many patties to overflow the kitchen, cornering Mr. Krabs] Help! Help! [the amount of Krabby Patties fills up the kitchen and the Krusty Krab itself, causing the whole restaurant to explode, sending thousands of patties raining down in front of the citizens] ;s1e25_71 Error: Could not extract speaker and replica from line. ; Error: Could not extract speaker and replica from line. ;s1e25_72 Mr. Krabs ; [with his head bursting through one of SpongeBob's employee pictures] Wait, you've got to pay for those! Wait! Wait! Wait! Boys, the Krabby Patties! [SpongeBob and Squidward come through the picture frame that Mr. Krabs is in and ask him who is the winner, while Mr. Krabs is still complaining about the Krabby Patties] ;s1e25_73 SpongeBob; So, who's the winner of Employee of the Month? ;s1e25_74 Squidward; Me, me! It's me! [SpongeBob and Squidward continue calling out simultaneously about who is the winner] ;s1e25_75 Mr. Krabs ; Boys! Wait! Boys, the Krabby Patties! Boys, wait! [The three continue to argue as the episode fades to black.] ;s1e25_76 {system}; [The episode begins during nighttime at Bikini Bottom.] ;s1e26_1 French Narrator ; Halloween is no different under the waves. Pirates, skeletons, and sea monsters. [laughs evilly] Oop, sorry. Everyone having fun. Well, almost everyone. [SpongeBob is washing the dishes in the Krusty Krab kitchen. The door creaks open, and SpongeBob jumps in surprise] ;s1e26_2 SpongeBob;" Huh? Who's there? [door creaks open some more as SpongeBob goes back to washing some dishes. Turns around and three pieces of paper spelling out ""boo"" turn on the ordering turntable. SpongeBob speeds up the cleaning of the dishes until he finishes] Okay, Mr. Krabs, the dishes are done, I'm leaving! [tries running out, but Mr. Krabs stops him in his tracks] ";s1e26_3 Mr. Krabs ; Hold on. Don't you want to hear my annual scary story? ;s1e26_4 SpongeBob; No thank you, Mr. Krabs. Uhh, does it have monsters in it? ;s1e26_5 Mr. Krabs ; Aye, the worst monster of them all. ;s1e26_6 SpongeBob; Uhh... no. [opens the door then turns around] Is it a true story? ;s1e26_7 Mr. Krabs ; True as the deep blue. ;s1e26_8 Mr. Krabs ;" Have a seat, me boy. [He runs while saying ""hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot"" when carrying the campfire before sitting on a log. Mr. Krabs puts a campfire in the middle of them] Every year on Halloween night, the Flying Dutchman descends on Bikini Bottom, in a pirate ship, just like this. [holds up a Krabby Patty] Only bigger! ";s1e26_9 SpongeBob; Excuse me, did his ship look like a Krabby Patty? ;s1e26_10 Mr. Krabs ; Like I was saying, the Flying Dutchman swoops down and starts stealing people's souls. [holds up a pickle] [A ghost is screaming in the background.] ;s1e26_11 Mr. Krabs ;" Aye, as a matter of fact, they do. And he puts them where you can never get them... [The ghost continues to scream.] in his soul bag. [drops the pickle into a bag that has the words ""Krusty Krab"" crossed out and the word ""souls"" written above it. Mr. Krabs laughs evilly as Squidward appears behind SpongeBob in a pirate suit] ";s1e26_12 Squidward; I've come for your pickle. ;s1e26_13 {system}; [SpongeBob jumps up screaming. Afterwards, Squidward takes off his hat and fake beard.] ;s1e26_14 Mr. Krabs ; Ha, ScaredyPants gets easier to scare every year! ;s1e26_15 SpongeBob; Humph, Squidward! ;s1e26_16 Mr. Krabs ; Nothing like a good ghost story, eh, me boy? Hope you're not too scared to come to me party tonight, SpongeBob ScaredyPants! [laughs while walking out] ;s1e26_17 Squidward; [walks up behind SpongeBob] Steal your soul. [SpongeBob jumps out of the Krusty Krab screaming and beings to walk home. As he is walking home, he sees a jack-o-lantern and then he walks up to a kid in a cowboy costume] ;s1e26_18 Kid; Twick-ow-tweat! [SpongeBob screams and runs away. The kid?s parents walk up next to their son] ;s1e26_19 Mother; It's okay, son. That's just SpongeBob ScaredyPants. [SpongeBob is walking home until Mrs. Puff drives up and honks the horn, sending SpongeBob screaming and jumping to hold onto the street light] ;s1e26_20 Mrs. Puff ; Happy Halloween, ScaredyPants. [drives off laughing] ;s1e26_21 SpongeBob; The name's SquarePants. It's SquarePants! ;s1e26_22 {system}; [Bubble transitions to SpongeBob's house. SpongeBob and Gary are inside a pumpkin. SpongeBob is carving out a pumpkin from the inside.] ;s1e26_23 SpongeBob; I don't get it, Gary. Every Halloween, no matter how hard I try, everybody scares me. ;s1e26_24 Gary;Meow.;s1e26_25 SpongeBob; Well, I'm sick of it. [SpongeBob comes out of the carved mouth of the pumpkin] No more ScaredyPants! [notices his pumpkin and screams while running into his closet] ;s1e26_26 Patrick; [knocks at the door of SpongeBob's home] SpongeBob! ;s1e26_27 Patrick; Hiya, SpongeBob! [SpongeBob screams. Patrick takes his glasses off] Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. ;s1e26_28 SpongeBob; [on ceiling] Why can't I be frightening for once? [drops to the floor] Where's my chance? ;s1e26_29 Patrick; Well, if you want to be scary, you got to need a good costume. [he and SpongeBob walk inside] ;s1e26_30 SpongeBob; What do you think? ;s1e26_31 Patrick; Great! You're going as my trick-or-treat bag! ;s1e26_32 SpongeBob; No, no! I'm the ghost of the Flying Dutchman! ;s1e26_33 Patrick; Eh, something's missing. I know! [Patrick runs inside SpongeBob's closet. A tree falls down but then gets sawed down by Patrick. Patrick comes out with a pair of clogs] Step into these babies, Hans. [SpongeBob steps into the clogs] Terrifying. ;s1e26_34 SpongeBob; I don't know, Patrick. ;s1e26_35 {system}; [Doorbell rings] ;s1e26_36 Patrick; Come on, SpongeBob. It's little kids! Little kids are easy to scare! ;s1e26_37 {system}; [Door opens] ;s1e26_38 Kids;Trick-or-treat!;s1e26_39 {system}; [The kids laugh.] ;s1e26_40 Kid; Look, it's the haunted mattress! [The kids laugh again.] ;s1e26_41 SpongeBob; Okay, okay, here's your candy. ;s1e26_42 Kid; No, please, that was enough of a treat, thank you. ;s1e26_43 {system}; [The kids walk away laughing] ;s1e26_44 SpongeBob; I don't get it, Patrick. ;s1e26_45 Patrick; SpongeBob, look at my new paper ghost! [Patrick holds scissors in his right hand a has a puppet on his left hand] Oooh, scary. ;s1e26_46 SpongeBob; That is it, Patrick! ;s1e26_47 Patrick; What's it? ;s1e26_48 SpongeBob; What's the difference between that ghost and me? ;s1e26_49 {system}; [Patrick concentrates] ;s1e26_50 Patrick; No, no, no wait. Don't tell me. [concentrates more] D-don't tell me. Don't tell me! Don't tell me! I can do this! I can do this! Don't tell me! Don't tell me! Don't tell me! [pants] Okay, tell me. ;s1e26_51 SpongeBob; I've got a square head... [points both hands to his head and grabs the puppet ghost] ...and a real ghost has a round one. [follows his index finger around the perimeters of the puppet ghost's head] All we have to do is make my head round and boo! I'm scary! [Bubble transitions to SpongeBob sitting on a chair in his bathroom. Patrick has goggles on] ;s1e26_52 Patrick; Okay, are you ready? ;s1e26_53 SpongeBob; [shows paper ghost] Remember, like this. ;s1e26_54 {system}; [Patrick razors off SpongeBob's sides] ;s1e26_55 Patrick; Are you sure you want to do this? ;s1e26_56 SpongeBob; Shave me down, make me round! ;s1e26_57 {system}; [Patrick razors off more and uses one piece to wipe off his sweat from his forehead] ;s1e26_58 Patrick; All right, let's get to it. [razors off more part. Later, SpongeBob is a round ghost] ;s1e26_59 SpongeBob; What do you think? ;s1e26_60 Patrick; Perfect. [shakes SpongeBob's hand] Now that's scary! [Patrick puts on his funny glasses] Let's go scare somebody. [Scene cuts to SpongeBob running down a street trying to scare people] ;s1e26_61 SpongeBob; Oooh... I'm the Flying Dutchman! ;s1e26_62 Patrick; Oooh... I don't know who I am! [SpongeBob pretends to fly and rings the doorbell of one of the homes. The man inside opens the door.] ;s1e26_63 SpongeBob; Rawr! Rawr! I'm the Flying Dutchman! ;s1e26_64 {system}; Hey, don't you kids want your candy? [both jump behind some coral in the shape of a skeleton head] ;s1e26_65 SpongeBob; Do you think? ;s1e26_66 SpongeBob; Who should we scare next? ;s1e26_67 Patrick; There's a whole party just full of people down at the Krusty Krab and the Flying Dutchman is going to show up uninvited. [kids laughing] Oh! Here comes someone now! [SpongeBob jumps out to scare the kids from earlier] ;s1e26_68 Kid; Wasn't that the Haunted Mattress? ;s1e26_69 Kid; I guess he's been demoted to a haunted sleeping bag! [The kids laugh.] ;s1e26_70 {system}; [Scene cuts to the Krusty Krab, where there is a Halloween feast going on. Mr. Krabs is bobbing for apples with his daughter Pearl, who is dressed up as Frankenstein's bride. Mr. Krabs successfully bobs an apple, but accidentally swallows it. Mr. Krabs chokes on an apple] ;s1e26_71 Pearl; Oh, dad, you're embarrassing me again! [cries and runs off. Krabs spits out the apple which shoots past Squidward (dressing up as a pirate) and Sandy (whose hair and head are in the shape of a goldfish), breaking a window off-screen in the process] ;s1e26_72 Sandy; Howdy, Squidward, I mean, Flying Dutchman. Great party, huh? ;s1e26_73 Squidward; What are you supposed to be? ;s1e26_74 Sandy; Why, I'm a pet goldfish in a bowl! ;s1e26_75 Squidward; I don't get it. [Sandy and Squidward drink the fruit punch. Meanwhile, SpongeBob and Patrick are on the roof of the Krusty Krab. SpongeBob is tied up with some rope which Patrick will lower him in with. SpongeBob opens a door on the roof to peek through to look at the party] ;s1e26_76 Patrick; Are you ready, SpongeBob? [thumbs up from SpongeBob] ;s1e26_77 SpongeBob; Okay, Patrick, kill the lights! ;s1e26_78 {system}; [Lights go off. As soon as this happens, everybody begins panicking and running around screaming. SpongeBob is lowered in appearing with a scary look. Patrick begins talking through a megaphone to scare everyone. Mr. Krabs even hides in the apple barrel] ;s1e26_79 Patrick; Wa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! I am the Flying Dutchman! Booga-booga-booga-booga-booga-booga! Give me your souls! [a jellyfish comes up behind Patrick and zaps him in the butt.] Huh? [Patrick stands up there for a few seconds. He screams and starts running around in circles while SpongeBob is tumbling.] Ow! Ow! ;s1e26_80 SpongeBob; Whoa! [flails around in and around. Patrick rubs his rear on the Krusty Krab chimney trying to shake off the jellyfish sting. As Patrick continues to run around, SpongeBob dangles upside down, revealing his pants.] ;s1e26_81 Kid; [notices SpongeBob's pants] Hey, that's no Dutchman, that's SpongeBob! ;s1e26_82 Sandy;SpongeBob?;s1e26_83 Squidward; SpongeBob. [everyone laughs] ;s1e26_84 SpongeBob; [still dangling] Help! Help! ;s1e26_85 Patrick; [using megaphone] I am not SpongeBob. Those are my street clothes! ;s1e26_86 Crowd;" [All laughing, one of them says ""Flying Dutchman! Flying Dope-man!""] ";s1e26_87 {system}; [Lightning strikes. The entrance of the Krusty Krab suddenly opens a bright light.] ;s1e26_88 FlyingDutchman;Enough!;s1e26_89 {system}; [Everyone gasps as glowing green smoke comes into the Krusty Krab. A glowing green figure appears, it turns out to be the Flying Dutchman. He does an evil laugh, making everyone scream in terror.] ;s1e26_90 Mr. Krabs ; It's the real Flying Dutchman! [he faints] ;s1e26_91 FlyingDutchman; You bet your lily-white livers, I'm the Flying Dutchman. And I'll let you in on a little secret. I'm going to steal your soul. [everyone screams] Quiet! [breathes out flames to burn them] You had it coming, you little crybabies. Every year, people dressing like me. [Squidward takes his costume off and whistles nonchalantly] Turning the Flying Dutchman name in a laughingstock. But that's not the reason I'm taking your souls. [pointing at SpongeBob, who is hanging upside down] No, this is the straw that broke the camel's back. Out of all the Dutchman costumes I've seen, yours is the most insulting. ;s1e26_92 SpongeBob; Do you mean I'm not scary? ;s1e26_93 {system}; You? Scary?! [cackles, then cuts the rope holding SpongeBob, and he falls to the floor] Let me tell you about scary, kid. There's all kinds of scary things in the world. Spiders are scary, uhh, I'm scary. You... you're not scary. Okay, let's get this over with. [flies back to the partygoers to steal their souls and evilly laughs in their faces again which makes everyone scream in terror again, one fish even shaking his head begging for mercy] ;s1e26_94 Sandy;SpongeBob!;s1e26_95 FlyingDutchman; First, I gotta get rid of this stupid costume. [removes SpongeBob's ghost costume...then stares at SpongeBob in horror. The Flying Dutchman flies out of the Krusty Krab screaming. SpongeBob is now shown as skinless with just a brain, eyes, and a mouth with the lower half of his body] ;s1e26_96 SpongeBob; Hey, what do you know? I scared him! [laughs] ;s1e26_97 {system}; [Everyone else, except Patrick and himself, runs out screaming] ;s1e26_98 SpongeBob; It worked, Patrick. I scared everybody! ;s1e26_99 Patrick; Yeah, I guess it was your pink hat. ;s1e26_100 SpongeBob; Pink hat? Oh, that's not a hat. That's my brain. [pats his brain] ;s1e26_101 Patrick; Ohh... [he runs away screaming, and the screen fades to black.] ;s1e26_102 SpongeBob; [off-screen] Don't worry, it grows back! [The episode ends.] ;s1e26_103 SpongeBob; [Gary is on his exercise wheel] Exercise time is over, Gary. [takes Gary off his wheel] We don't want you getting too thin. [holds up a green, squishy ball] Here, boy. Fetch! [throws it and Gary goes after it but at a slow pace. SpongeBob checks his watch and sits on a chair and takes out the newspaper to read. Morning arrives, the rooster crows and SpongeBob is asleep in the chair. Gary crawls up to SpongeBob and spits out the ball] ;s1e27_1 Gary;Meow.;s1e27_2 SpongeBob; Huh? [sees the ball on the ground] Good job, Gary! [He jumps to Gary] I love you, Gary! [He starts scratching Gary and Gary purrs] Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary! [Gary climbs up on SpongeBob, purring and tickling him] Ha, ha! Down, boy! Ha ha! [Patrick comes through the door] ;s1e27_3 Patrick; SpongeBob! Are you ready? Are you ready? Are you ready? ;s1e27_4 SpongeBob; For what? ;s1e27_5 Patrick; The annual jellyfish convention in Ukulele Bottom this weekend! [shows his jellyfishing net off until he breaks something and blushes with embarrassment] So, you ready or what? ;s1e27_6 SpongeBob; That was this weekend? [He looks up at Gary who's still crawling all over him trying to tickle him] I can't go I don't have anyone to take care of Gary! ;s1e27_7 {system}; [There's a knock on the door. Squidward is seen outside. The door opens, but the first thing Squidward sees is Gary on SpongeBob's head. He looks down at SpongeBob and reveals a pair of underwear.] ;s1e27_8 SpongeBob; Squidward, could you watch Gary this weekend? ;s1e27_9 Squidward; What's a Gary? ;s1e27_10 SpongeBob; Not a Gary. Gary. He's my pet snail. [shows Gary to Squidward] Say hello! [Gary hisses at Squidward and drools] ;s1e27_11 SpongeBob; I love Gary! ;s1e27_12 Squidward; Well, I don't. Get somebody else. [walks off] ;s1e27_13 SpongeBob; I guess we can't go away this weekend after all, Patrick. [Squidward stops] ;s1e27_14 Squidward; Go away? [walks in reverse back to SpongeBob's Pineapple] You mean, if I watch Gary, you guys will be gone all weekend? ;s1e27_15 Squidward; As in, not here for three days? ;s1e27_16 SpongeBob; Yeah, but you've already said you can't do it, we understand. ;s1e27_17 Patrick; Don't feel bad, Squidward. The three of us can still have our own jellyfish convention at your house! ;s1e27_18 Squidward; I changed my mind. You guys deserve a weekend away. ;s1e27_19 SpongeBob; You'll do it? Great! Let me show you a little bit about snail care. You need to take Gary for a walk twice a day. [SpongeBob explains the daily routine with Gary, but Squidward is busy thinking of how much fun he'll have with SpongeBob & Patrick away] ;s1e27_20 Squidward; Friday, Saturday and Sunday - a three-day weekend. ;s1e27_21 SpongeBob; Let me show you how to feed him. [opens a cabinet with six barrels of Gary's food, 3 snail food cans on the top row marked morning and 3 snail food cans marked night on the bottom row] I have all the cans marked, a can in the morning and a can at night. ;s1e27_22 Squidward; Sure it's enough? [bus drives up to the pineapple with other jellyfishers inside] ;s1e27_23 Group; [chanting]: Jellyfishing! Jellyfishing! Jellyfishing! Jellyfishing! ;s1e27_24 Patrick; The bus is here! The bus is here! [crashes through the wall and through the bus leaving his starfish shape through each hole] C'mon, SpongeBob! ;s1e27_25 Group; [all chanting]: Jellyfishing! Jellyfishing! Jellyfishing! ;s1e27_26 Squidward; [pushing SpongeBob out of the house] Well, time to go. Don't want to be late. Have fun, bye bye. ;s1e27_27 Squidward; I have the memory of an elephant, I'll take good care of Fred. ;s1e27_28 SpongeBob;Gary.;s1e27_29 Squidward; Right, yeah, right. [SpongeBob joins in the chanting, along with Patrick and the group, as the bus drives off]: Jellyfishing, jellyfishing, jellyfishing...! So long, losers! [laughs] They're gone! [runs inside his Easter Island Head. Gary peeks his eyes out the window] ;s1e27_30 Squidward;" [comes out with shorts on and his nose with sunscreen on it and a chair. Unfolds the chair and sits on it] This is going to be the best three days of my life. [sighs and lays back with a tanning mirror in front of him] I'm going to do all the things I can't normally do because of SpongeBob. [The time card ""3 Days Later"" appears, and now Squidward is badly sunburned, The bus comes back as the group is chanting ""jellyfishing""] Well, thus ends the greatest weekend of my life. No SpongeBob, no Patrick, nothing but me, me, me. [Squidward sees Gary through the window. Gary groans. Squidward's sunburn drains] [screams] The snail! I forgot the snail! [runs inside the pineapple where Gary is old and withered on the floor. Squidward frantically takes him to the kitchen] I've gotta do something. [takes all the cans of food and puts it in his bowl] Okay, okay, okay. Here we go. Here we go. Right here. [Squidward frantically throws the food at Gary trying to get him to eat it] [Gary lip syncing what Squidward's saying]: Eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat! You gotta finish this food! ";s1e27_31 SpongeBob; See you later, Patrick. ;s1e27_32 Squidward; Come on, eat! Eat! Eat! [SpongeBob gets his house key out. Squidward has to decide about the food] Ohh... ;s1e27_33 SpongeBob; [sticks the key in the hole and opens the door] Gary! I'm home! ;s1e27_34 Squidward; [greets SpongeBob with a head full of Gary's food that he ate] Hi, SpongeBob. ;s1e27_35 SpongeBob; Squidward! What are you doing here? [Squidward swallows all the food] ;s1e27_36 Squidward; Oh, just checking up on old Gary for you. ;s1e27_37 SpongeBob; What a great friend you are, Squidward. ;s1e27_38 Squidward; So, uhh, well, see you. Goodbye. ;s1e27_39 Incidental 116 ; Yes, yes, it's just as I thought. ;s1e27_40 SpongeBob;What?;s1e27_41 Incidental 116 ; This is definitely a snail. ;s1e27_42 SpongeBob; I knew it! Oh, Squid, did you hear that? ;s1e27_43 Incidental 116 ; Therefore, a shot of snail plasma must be carefully administered. Here you go. [hands the syringe to SpongeBob] ;s1e27_44 SpongeBob; Aren't you going to do it? ;s1e27_45 Incidental 116 ; Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm too squeamish. [Incidental 116 leaves. Squidward runs after him] ;s1e27_46 Squidward; Uhh, hey, doc, let me help you with your bag there. ;s1e27_47 SpongeBob; Squid, wait! I can't give Gary his plasma. I'm squeamish too. ;s1e27_48 Squidward; Aww, SpongeBob, I don't want to do... [Gary moans and coughs badly] ;s1e27_49 SpongeBob;Gary!;s1e27_50 Squidward; Okay, okay! I'll do it. [takes the shot] ;s1e27_51 SpongeBob; Now, don't hurt him, Squidward. Okay, steady. [Squidward tries to give Gary the shot but SpongeBob pulls him away] Wait, that's too hard! Okay, okay, okay, try it again. [Squidward tries again, but SpongeBob pulls Gary away once again] Wait! [pulls Gary away again] Wait! [Squidward keeps trying but gets the same result every time] Wait, wait! ;s1e27_52 Squidward; [stammers] Will you hold him still? ;s1e27_53 SpongeBob; Wait, wait, wait! Wait, wait, wait! ;s1e27_54 Squidward; [stammers] Will you hold him still?! [accidentally injects the snail plasma shot in SpongeBob's nose] ;s1e27_55 SpongeBob; Ouch! Uh, Squidward, you've injected me with snail plasma. ;s1e27_56 Squidward; Well, you made me do it! [removes the shot] ;s1e27_57 SpongeBob; What's going to happen to me? ;s1e27_58 Squidward; Oh, nothing, it's just a little snail plasma. ;s1e27_59 SpongeBob; I don't know, I feel kind of funny! ;s1e27_60 Squidward; I'm telling you, it's all in your head! ;s1e27_61 {system}; [Gary crawls to his water bowl to get a drink. After drinking the water, he gargles, clears his throat, and meows normally again.] ;s1e27_62 Squidward; He just needed water? ;s1e27_63 SpongeBob; Oh, Gary, you're better! [hugs him] ;s1e27_64 SpongeBob; Squidward, wait, the snail plasma! ;s1e27_65 Gary;Meow.;s1e27_66 Gary; [jumps up] Meow! [SpongeBob pours food into Gary's bowl, but decides to see what it tastes like. He likes it so he eats all of it. Then walks to Gary with the empty bowl] ;s1e27_67 SpongeBob; Here ya go. Eat up, Gary. ;s1e27_68 SpongeBob; Sorry, Gary, I couldn't control myself. [burps] Meow. Why did I just do that? Am I cracking up? ;s1e27_69 Gary;Meow.;s1e27_70 SpongeBob; No, no, Squidward's right. I'm fine. I- I worry too much. It's all in my head. I feel tip-top! [SpongeBob begins to walk out of the kitchen. His feet make loud pounding noises as they hit the floor, and he begins to go slower and slower. Soon Gary is going faster than he is.] ;s1e27_71 SpongeBob; Gary, you're getting a [voice slows, lowers] lot faster! [SpongeBob sluggishly walks into the bathroom, and Gary follows him. He looks in the mirror, and his voice echoes as he speaks.] ;s1e27_72 SpongeBob; Look at me. Never better. [He yelps as dramatic music begins to play in the background. His head begins to throb, and his pores begin to grow and shrink, before returning to normal.] I'm okay! Squidward said I'm fine! [What he doesn't realize is that the worst is yet to come. His eyes bug out of his head, causing him to yell. The camera rotates around so we can get a side view of SpongeBob. He blinks, and his eyes briefly pop back into his head and return to normal. But this relief only lasts for about half a second. Then, his eyes bulge out even farther than before, and it looks very unnatural. They bulge for a while, and then they begin to transform, taking the shape and form of snail's eyes, with stalks. The sight causes SpongeBob's jaw to drop, and he screams louder. SpongeBob stares in the bathroom mirror at his brand-new eyestalks, which now have skin and eyelids around them. He turns to Gary.] ;s1e27_73 SpongeBob; Gary... I'm fine! [But SpongeBob is not fine. Gary watches in horror as his owner falls onto his hands and knees, straining in pain.] ;s1e27_74 SpongeBob; [in so much pain that he is barely comprehensible] Yyyyyy-yyyooooou'll see. [grunts and strains as his hand and arm slowly retract into his sleeve, which then pops off and bounces away] That's okay, I'm a lefty anyway! [Despite his left hand falling off, causing an error] [Then, SpongeBob's feet and legs retract into his pants.] ;s1e27_75 SpongeBob; [laughs nervously] Ha! Now I don't have to buy those new shoes! [his body shortens up like a snail and he screams] I take it back, Gary. Something is wrong with meeeee [he loses the ability to talk and completes his snail transformation] ow! ;s1e27_76 Squidward; [in his bed with his clarinet] I hope I never see another snail again. Good night, Clary. [a knock is heard on the door and the doorbell rings] Who could that be? As if I didn't already know. [Camera goes to Squidward?s front door. Squidward turns on the light, walks to the door, and opens it] SpongeBob, I already told you. You're gonna be just-- [attempts to say ?fine,? but hesitates and shouts almost hysterically. SpongeBob is now a fully breaded snail.] ;s1e27_77 SpongeBob;Meow!;s1e27_78 Squidward;[screams];s1e27_79 SpongeBob; Meow! Meow. [Squidward touches SpongeBob's left eye and it curls up] ;s1e27_80 Squidward; [screams and runs back inside shutting the door] ;s1e27_81 Squidward; SpongeBob? Oh, Neptune, what have I done? [picks up the snail plasma syringe] It's all your fault! [throws it away] Okay, okay, okay, okay, get it together, Squidward. ;s1e27_82 SpongeBob; Meow! [Squidward screams in horror and puts boards and nails on his door. Turns around and SpongeBob is at his window] Meow. Meow. [Squidward screams in horror] Meow! [Squidward puts more boards on his window, but SpongeBob squeezes through the boards holes] Meow. Meow. [Squidward screams and runs into his closet] ;s1e27_83 Squidward; None of this would be happening if I'd only fed that snail! ;s1e27_84 {system}; [SpongeBob squeezes in from under the door, and meows. Squidward screams and runs through his door, SpongeBob meows, Squidward runs up and down his ceiling, screaming and mumbling, while SpongeBob keeps meowing at him. Outside, his house is bouncing from side to side until it flips on its side completely. Everything is broken and torn inside. Squidward sits up, but is injected with the snail plasma through his nose] ;s1e27_85 Squidward;Uh-oh!;s1e27_86 {system};" [Cut to a scene showing the full moon. Now SpongeBob, Squidward, and Gary are on a fence singing ""Blow the Man Down""] ";s1e27_87 Gary; Meow [C], meow [D], meow [C], meow [A], meow [F]. ;s1e27_88 SpongeBob; Meow [A], meow [C], meow [D], meow [C], meow [A]. ;s1e27_89 Gary; [Off-screen] Meow [C], meow [D], meow [C], meow [A], meow [F]. ;s1e27_90 Patrick; [opens his rock, wearing pajamas with an angry look on his face] Will you clam up?! [throws a boot] ;s1e27_91 SpongeBob; [Off-screen at the same time] Meow [A], meow [C], meow [D], meow [C], meow [A]. ;s1e27_92 Squidward; Meow [C], me- [D] Ommf! [boot knocks him off the fence and he lands with a crash] ;s1e27_93 Squidward; Meow [D], meow [D], meow [D], meow [D], meow [C], meow [A], meow [G], meow [A], meow [F]. ;s1e27_94 Voice; SB-129. [episode starts] ;s1e28_1 French Narrator ; Ah, it is Sunday morning in Bikini Bottom, and it is about time for Squidward to practice his clarinet. So get your ear plugs ready. ;s1e28_2 Squidward; [kisses his clarinet] I think I'll treat Bikini Bottom to some real music. [He gets ready to play his clarinet, and then SpongeBob's alarm clock goes off, sending Squidward's clarinet into his throat] Yow! [Struggles to dislodge the clarinet out of his throat.] ;s1e28_3 SpongeBob; Good morning, Squidward! Wanna go jellyfishing? [Squidward tries to yell, but his clarinet sounds every time he tries to talk] Great! We'll be right over! [Squidward pulls the clarinet out of his throat. Door knocks are heard] ;s1e28_4 Squidward; I wonder who that could be. [Squidward opens the door] ;s1e28_5 SpongeBob; Ready to go? ;s1e28_6 Squidward;" No, I'm not ""ready to go!"" [slams the door] ";s1e28_7 Patrick; He doesn't wanna play with us. ;s1e28_8 Squidward; No! [slams door. Then he goes back to try to play clarinet is interrupted once again by yet another knock at door. Squidward gets angry.] ;s1e28_9 SpongeBob; How about now? ;s1e28_10 Squidward; No! [slams the door. The knock on the door is heard again] Huh? [opens door] ;s1e28_11 Squidward; No! [slams the door. Another knock on the door and he opens it] ;s1e28_12 SpongeBob;Now?;s1e28_13 Squidward; No! [slams door, then opens it] ;s1e28_14 SpongeBob; How about now? ;s1e28_15 SpongeBob;Now?;s1e28_16 Squidward; No! [slams door, then opens it] ;s1e28_17 SpongeBob;Now?;s1e28_18 Squidward; No! [slams door, then opens it] ;s1e28_19 SpongeBob;Now?;s1e28_20 Squidward; No! [slams door, then opens it] ;s1e28_21 SpongeBob;Now?;s1e28_22 Squidward; No! [slams door, then opens it] No! [SpongeBob and Patrick are gone and they approach Squidward from behind. SpongeBob taps his shoulder] What?! ;s1e28_23 SpongeBob; Ready yet? ;s1e28_24 Squidward; No, I'm not ready! I'll never be ready! Don't you get it?! ;s1e28_25 SpongeBob; Sure we do. ;s1e28_26 Squidward; What? [stammers] D'oh...! [shuts the door and leaves his house, then realizes he's outside. He runs back to his door and knocks. SpongeBob opens it] ;s1e28_27 Squidward; Out! Sheesh! Shouldn't you be at work today, SpongeBob?! ;s1e28_28 SpongeBob; I'd love to be at work today! But it's Sunday the Krusty Krab is closed. [Squidward gets an idea] ;s1e28_29 Squidward; Hold on a second. I'll be right out. [closes the door. Squidward tiptoes out the other way of his house to the Krusty Krab, and enters] Hello...? [silence] Ahh, alone at last. [tries to play his clarinet, but SpongeBob and Patrick are heard outside] ;s1e28_30 SpongeBob; Well, he's not here. I'll bet that eager-beaver's already down at Jellyfish Fields! ;s1e28_31 Squidward; A-ha! They're finally gone! [tries to open the freezer, but it's locked from the inside!] What the...? [tries to open it multiple times] Locked?! Oh no! Oh... well, someone will realize I'm gone and come looking for me. I'll be out of here in no time. ;s1e28_32 French Narrator ; 2,000 years later... ;s1e28_33 {system}; [the scene shows Squidward still inside the freezer, frozen the hinges are rusty, and they fall off the door falls with Squidward frozen behind it SpongeTron flies past and then back to Squidward] ;s1e28_34 SpongeTron; Holy Krabby Patties! A frozen cephalopod! [SpongeTron grabs a chrome hammer from the hammer comes a red laser, which melts the ice and hits Squidward's buttocks Squidward screams] ;s1e28_35 Squidward; [trancelike] I'll be out of here in no time. ;s1e28_36 SpongeTron; Greetings, primitive. ;s1e28_37 Squidward; Sp...SpongeBob? Is that you? ;s1e28_38 SpongeTron; SpongeBob? No! [robot voice] I am SpongeTron. [normal voice] Welcome to the future! ;s1e28_39 SpongeTron; Welcome to the future! ;s1e28_40 Squidward; Uh, the future... [notices everything's chrome] Huh?! O-okay, uh, what's going on here? Why is everything... chrome? ;s1e28_41 SpongeTron; Everything is chrome in the future! ;s1e28_42 Squidward; Wha...? [stammers and runs to look outside a window] Oh, my... [notices the chrome environment. The screen pans around the chrome environment.] Impossible! He's lying! ;s1e28_43 {system}; [A flower pops up from underground, then a truck comes, Incidental 119 gets out of the truck, runs up to the flower, sprays it with chrome spray paint, then runs back in the truck and drives away. Squidward looks at the screen.] ;s1e28_44 Squidward; [Looks away from the window] He's right! ;s1e28_45 SpongeTron; Of course I'm right, Squidward! Just ask my clones: SpongeTrons X, Y, and Z. [Squidward flinches as a trio of SpongeTron clones have suddenly appeared next to them] ;s1e28_46 Squidward; Are the other letters of the alphabet involved here? ;s1e28_47 SpongeTron; Sure! All 486 of them! [A calendar on the wall says March 6, 4017 A.D. This means Squidward entered the freezer on March 6, 2017. Squidward does a few sit-ups while he talks as if he is trying to wake up] ;s1e28_48 Squidward; [Lays down and starts doing sit-ups] Future! Future! Future! Future! [SpongeTron drops a brick on Squidward's head] Thanks. Now listen! All of you! I don't belong here. This is all a horrible mistake! Please, we've got to do something! ;s1e28_49 SpongeTrons; [pull out jellyfishing nets] Jellyfishing! [a two-headed Patrick appears out of nowhere] ;s1e28_50 PatTron;" Did somebody say, ""jellyfishing""? ";s1e28_51 SpongeTron; Hi, PatTron! ;s1e28_52 Squidward; J-just listen to me! I'm not supposed to be here! I've gotta get home to my own time period! I've gotta go! ;s1e28_53 SpongeTron;" Well, why didn't you just ask? The time machine is down the hall, to the left. [Squidward runs to the door, laughs and enters, but the sound of a can-opener being used is heard. Squidward steps out and is torn into pieces, now appearing like a spring-shaped patch of skin] Oops! Oh, yeah, that one's the can opener... but try the one on the right. [Squidward tries the door on the right and enters a pink and green room that has a slot-looking machine that says ""past"" and ""future"" with a key near the slot] ";s1e28_54 Squidward;" Well, I wouldn't've chosen this interior... [notices time-travel handle] Oh, what's this? Well, if SpongeBob exists in the future, I'd better go to the past! [Squidward turns the key and puts the lever on ""past."" Siren goes off as time machine disappears from where it used to be in the Krusty Krab. SpongeTron waves at Squidward. The door and the wall fly through a hyperspace-like warp, then the time machine appears in a primitive Bikini Bottom.] ";s1e28_55 Squidward; [looks out and sees an Ammonite swim by. Whales calls can be heard] Wow, primitive. Has sort of an old-world charm. [a snake-like creature swims by really close to Squidward's face] Whoa! I guess this is before manners were invented! Well, at least there's no sign of SpongeBrat. Maybe now I can finally be alone with my clarinet. [hears a noise, turns around, but some shadow quickly hides. He hears another noise and checks again, but a different shadow hides] Huh? [one of the shadow figures swing from tree to tree] Huh? What?! [a shadow figure hides behind a tree] Huh!? [the other shadow figure hides behind a ledge. Squidward keeps walking and then notices a Prehistoric Sponge on the ground] SpongeBob? [Primate Sponge screams] Stay back! [Primate Sponge touches Squidward's arm and then sniffs his finger from what he touched. Tries to give some to Squidward] Uh, no thanks. [Squidward feels someone breathing on him and he turns and notices a Prehistoric Starfish breathing on him. Prehistoric Starfish smiles and reveals nasty, rotten teeth] Uh, hi there. Well, I better be going now. [Prehistoric Sponge grabs Squidward's tentacle] Yes, that's my arm. [Prehistoric Sponge puts Squidward's arm on his head and Prehistoric Starfish licks his hand] Oh, that's sweet. [Prehistoric Starfish gets scared he smashes on the ground and gets the shivers] What, is it time for your flea bath now? [a jellyfish swims by and Prehistoric Starfish ducks for protection] Oh, look, it's just a little jellyfish. [Primate Sponge and Prehistoric Starfish run around screaming] Well, I'm going away now. [Squidward walks away] Ah, here's a nice, shady spot, away from those fools! ;s1e28_56 {system}; [Squidward plays his clarinet and each time he tries to play, Primate Sponge or Prehistoric Starfish holler, who are each giving a turn at holding the jellyfish] ;s1e28_57 Squidward;" What are you simpletons doing?! You're supposed to catch these things, not torture yourself with them! [Primate Sponge and Prehistoric Starfish are confused] Give me those loincloths! [Primate Sponge and Prehistoric Starfish tear off a piece of their loincloth] I can't believe it. [mumbles to self. Crafts the loincloth jellyfishing nets. Shows them the nets.] This oughta make things go a little smoother! [gives Primate Sponge and Prehistoric Starfish their nets. They put the nets on their lips. Squidward facepalms and grabs the nets back] Give me those things! You're supposed to catch them, like this! [Squidward catches the jellyfish in one of the loincloth nets] It's called jellyfishing. [Primate SpongeBob and Prehistoric Starfish grab the nets and chase the jellyfish] Ah, finally. [sits on the ground and plays his clarinet. Primate Sponge and Prehistoric Starfish hear it, go berserk and chase Squidward. Squidward runs into the time machine as Primate Sponge and Prehistoric Starfish try to get in by climbing on top of it Squidward screams] Get me outta here! [frantically jams lever up and down and accidentally snaps it off] Uh-oh. [the word FUTURE spins like a slot machine, and stops on 2 lemons and a ""BAR""] ";s1e28_58 TimeMachine;Loser!;s1e28_59 {system};" [Primate Sponge and Prehistoric Starfish are banging on the time machine trying to get to Squidward until it disappears into thin-air. The time machine shakes from the inside, with Squidward scared. The camera zooms in, with a ""paint"" effect, then the camera is on Squidward's face, and a color change effect goes off as Squidward mouths the line ""What's going on?"" without audible dialogue. The screen flashes white, and the time machine goes through all sorts of dimensions, with one with a computer-like area, then the time machine folds like paper, and it vanishes with a zap sound.] ";s1e28_60 {system}; [Squidward appears in a blank, white space. He walks around, and hears a strange voice. He then notices some colored tiles and lifts one up and it floats and vanishes] ;s1e28_61 Squidward;" He's not here. No more SpongeBob. No more! I may finally have found a place where I can be all... [Squidward becomes tiny] ...alone! [a bunch of ""alone"" sayings appear with a different voice as each comes up] ";s1e28_62 Voices;" Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! Alone! [Continuous ""Alone"" chanting is heard, as the screen continuously gets smaller and smaller] ";s1e28_63 Squidward;" [is now suddenly closer to the camera] I gotta get outta of here! [Squidward tries to run, but he runs off and on the scene. He stops and tries to catch his breath. A strange voice is heard again, he holds his head, sweats a little, and runs again off and on the scene. He stops running after three tries to get out, yet another strange voice is heard when he stops] Where's the time machine?! Where's anything?! Where, where, where, where?! [jumps up and down angrily and busts a hole through the ground into the time machine. The handle is still broken off. Squidward bangs on the broken controls and sobs] I wanna go home! I wanna go home! I wanna go home! I wanna go home! I miss Bikini Bottom! I miss my Easter Island head! I even miss SpongeBob! [right when Squidward says ""SpongeBob,"" the time machine disappears and reappears in present time Bikini Bottom where SpongeBob and Patrick are still waiting for Squidward in front of his house] SpongeBob! Patrick! ";s1e28_64 Squidward; Oh, I'm back! I can't believe this. I-I-I was in space, a-and I went to the future, and-and then I went to the past, and-and then-then I was nowhere, but now I'm back, and-and... you don't know how happy I am to see you guys. ;s1e28_65 Patrick;Jellyfishing?;s1e28_66 SpongeBob; You are, Squidward! [They laugh as the scene cuts to Bikini Atoll on the surface] ;s1e28_67 Squidward; I'm going back. [The episode ends.] ;s1e28_68 {system}; [The episode begins with SpongeBob lurking around, heading home, looking for Sandy because they are playing karate. He suspects the pineapple of being Sandy] ;s1e29_1 SpongeBob; Hi-yah! Oh, sorry, pineapple house. I thought you were someone else. [walks inside] Ah, what a great day at work. [hears something] Huh? Yeah... [tip toes over to the couch, but makes duck sounds as he tip toes. He realizes he's been stepping on three squeaky toy ducks, and in frustration, he kicks them away. Then he runs in front of his couch] I know you're back there, Sandy! And I also know that nobody can hide from Sponge... [jumps behind the couch and no one is there] ...Bob. [has his back to the couch while he squeezes his eyes through the couch looking for Sandy. When he thinks he has spotted her, he runs out from behind the couch and in front of the TV] I got you now! Hi-yah! [no one is there, so he sits on the couch and watches TV] Well, I guess the coast is clear. ;s1e29_2 TV;" [shows a royal gramma fish] Yeah, shopping's weird. Did you ever go into the seafood aisle and say ?Who eats this stuff""? [TV audience laughs] ";s1e29_3 SpongeBob; [laughs too] I love this show! [Sandy is sitting next to SpongeBob] ;s1e29_4 Sandy; Me too! [SpongeBob screams and begins to fight] ;s1e29_5 SpongeBob; Hi-yah! [Sandy puts on her green karate gear] ;s1e29_6 Sandy; Hi-yah! [SpongeBob high-kicks in slow-motion] ;s1e29_7 SpongeBob; Hi-yah! [Sandy runs off then drives forward, but SpongeBob jumps his upper half of his body to avoid Sandy] Uhh, just a second. [runs off, but returns with his red karate gear on] Safety first! [he winks] And now, spin technique! [spins around and lunges towards Sandy] ;s1e29_8 SpongeBob; Double overhand squirrel knot! [turns her into a round knot and throws her through the door like a bowling ball] ;s1e29_9 Sandy; I'm gonna get you tomorrow, SpongeBob! ;s1e29_10 SpongeBob; That'll be the day. Whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop! [spins his arms and legs around. The scene fades over to nighttime at Sandy's treedome. Sandy hums while reading a book when the phone rings.] ;s1e29_11 SpongeBob; Hey, Sandy, have you ever heard the one about the squirrel and the tin cans? ;s1e29_12 Sandy; I don't think so. ;s1e29_13 SpongeBob; Well, it goes like this! [stretches his arm to ricochet off a shelf and the ceiling to come at Sandy] Oh, wait, I forgot the punch line. [His arm stops right before hitting Sandy.] Oh, yeah! [hits the loose board on the floor, sending Sandy into a pile of tin cans. He laughs.] That's a good one, isn't it? [Bubble transition to SpongeBob walking down the road] What a beautiful day. Beautiful sky. Beautiful plants. Hi plants. Beautiful... [sees a pile of tin cans on the ground] pile of cans? Mmm, mmm, Sandy, that is your worst disguise yet. [He puts on karate gear] ;s1e29_14 Sandy; No it's not, SpongeBob. [shows him a squirrel mask] This is! [jumps in front of SpongeBob] Now, prepare for a long, merciless whooping! [grabs SpongeBob's tongue and takes out a bottle of hot Volcano Sauce] Mmmm, my favorite. ;s1e29_15 VolcanoSauceDrop; Eheheheheheh! [cut to SpongeBob's confused face, and then back to the Volcano Sauce Drop] By the powers of naughtiness, I command this particular drop of hot sauce to be really... really... hot! ;s1e29_16 {system}; [SpongeBob gasps.] ;s1e29_17 SpongeBob; Sandy! Wait! Victory is yours. ;s1e29_18 Sandy; I knew you'd come to your senses, SpongeBob. ;s1e29_19 {system};" [Sandy drinks the bottle of hot sauce. While she is doing this, SpongeBob takes out his tongue revealing a label that says ""Novelty Toy"" and he wraps the fake tongue she was holding around her and spins her] ";s1e29_20 SpongeBob;Yah.;s1e29_21 {system}; [Sandy karate chops SpongeBob far away] ;s1e29_22 Sandy;Hi-yah!;s1e29_23 SpongeBob; Curses! [Now at the Krusty Krab, the line is very long] ;s1e29_24 Fred; With extra cheese. To go! ;s1e29_25 Squidward; Three patties, four large oyster skins, on the double, SpongeBob! [SpongeBob is still wearing his karate gear] ;s1e29_26 SpongeBob; Oh yeah. Gotcha! [SpongeBob opens a door] ;s1e29_27 SpongeBob; What? [karate chops Squidward's face] ;s1e29_28 Squidward; I'm going to pretend that didn't happen. [throws two pieces of paper at SpongeBob] Now fill these orders or leave, SpongeBob. We're very busy today! [SpongeBob runs out of the kitchen with tray of patties in his hands] ;s1e29_29 SpongeBob; Order up. [stops as he sees a customer karate chopping a fly. The customer turns into Sandy who is in her gear and winks at SpongeBob] ;s1e29_30 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, Squidward. I was going through some records back in me office and--Huh? So, you got the hairpiece after all. ;s1e29_31 SpongeBob;Hi-yah!;s1e29_32 Fred; [under the floor] My leg! ;s1e29_33 SpongeBob; Thought you could sneak up on me at work, did ya? Well, you can't! ?Cause I'm fast, I'm mean, and I can do this! [does something with his hands] Ssss! [Points at Fred, then walks backwards] Took care of her, yes I did. [bumps into Mr. Krabs] Oh, ahoy, sir! ;s1e29_34 Mr. Krabs ; What was that? ;s1e29_35 SpongeBob; But, sir, she snuck up on me. In my own dojo. ;s1e29_36 Mr. Krabs ; Are you on some new allergy medication, boy? ;s1e29_37 SpongeBob; No, sir. Just practicing my karate, sir. Or kara-tay, as some call it. ;s1e29_38 Mr. Krabs ; Kara-tay? You should be making me money-ay! With your spatu-lae! Now get back to work. ;s1e29_39 Squidward; SpongeBob, did you get those bathrooms mopped yet? [SpongeBob is staring at his hands] ;s1e29_40 SpongeBob; Yes, ma'am. I mean, sir. I mean, boss. I mean, poobah! ;s1e29_41 Squidward; [frustrated] Go! ;s1e29_42 {system}; [SpongeBob walks into the bathroom with a mop and a bucket in his hands. He hears a sneeze, so he opens a door, but nobody is there] ;s1e29_43 SpongeBob; Hah! [opens the next stall door and jumps in it] Sandy! [Mr. Krabs walks out of the stall with SpongeBob in his hand] ;s1e29_44 Mr. Krabs ; No more. ;s1e29_45 SpongeBob; But, Mr. Krabs. [Mr. Krabs grabs a hold of SpongeBob's mouth] ;s1e29_46 Mr. Krabs ; Shh! No more of this karate stuff, lad. Or you're fired. [lets go of his mouth and walks away] ;s1e29_47 SpongeBob; [high-pitched voice] Fired? [walks out] No more karate? How am I gonna tell Sandy? ;s1e29_48 Sandy; Hi-yah! [jumps at SpongeBob and starts karate chopping him] ;s1e29_49 SpongeBob; Sandy, wait! I can't. Mr. Krabs said I have to give up karate. ;s1e29_50 Sandy; [stops] Uh-huh. Sure, SpongeBob. [Sandy karate chops him again] ;s1e29_51 SpongeBob; No, no. Really, Sandy. Stop. ;s1e29_52 Sandy; [stops] I'm not falling for it, SpongeBob! [karate chops him even more] ;s1e29_53 SpongeBob; No, really! Please, stop! [Mr. Krabs looks out the window] ;s1e29_54 Mr. Krabs ; What the? [walks outside] SpongeBob! [SpongeBob screams] ;s1e29_55 SpongeBob; Ahh, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e29_56 Mr. Krabs ; What did I just get through telling ye, lad? ;s1e29_57 SpongeBob; But I, uhh, she... ;s1e29_58 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob, you're fired! ;s1e29_59 Sandy;Huh?;s1e29_60 SpongeBob; [high-pitched voice] Fired? [his face gets smaller until it's not there anymore] ;s1e29_61 Mr. Krabs ;Eh?;s1e29_62 Sandy; SpongeBob? [SpongeBob's face reappears and he then bursts out crying and runs everywhere] Wait, Mr. Krabs, it's not his fault! It's- it's mine! He tried to tell me, but I wouldn't listen! [SpongeBob is crying into a cup and drinking his tears. Now he's flipping over and over around Sandy and Mr. Krabs] Give him another chance, please? ;s1e29_63 Mr. Krabs ; Hmmm. [grabs SpongeBob as he runs] All right, me boy, I'll give you a second chance. But no more karate. It's poisoning your mind. [sniffs Sandy] Mmm, mammals. [walks off] ;s1e29_64 SpongeBob; [laughs, then suddenly stops] Nothing. Nothing is fun about that at all! ;s1e29_65 SpongeBob; We can? I mean, sure we can. Yeah! Like we can, uhh. [picks up a rock] We can squeeze things! [squeezes the rock and drops it] Woo! How much fun was that? ;s1e29_66 SpongeBob; I know! We can act like plants. [lies on the ground and opens and closes his legs and arms] Photosynthesis. Photosynthesis. ;s1e29_67 Sandy; Wanna go to the park? [SpongeBob and Sandy are at the park. SpongeBob is holding a basket in one hand] ;s1e29_68 Sandy; Yeah, you can say that again. ;s1e29_69 SpongeBob; I feel dumb just thinking about it. [puts the basket down] Duuuuh! I'm stuuuupiiid! I like karaaateee! Doyeee! ;s1e29_70 Sandy; You like what? ;s1e29_71 SpongeBob; Not karate. ;s1e29_72 Sandy; Ha! I don't even know what that is. ;s1e29_73 SpongeBob; Me, too. I don't know what anything is! In fact... ;s1e29_74 Fisherman; [casting off his fishing rod] Hi-yah! Hi-yah! ;s1e29_75 SpongeBob; [giggles] For a second, that sounded like. ;s1e29_76 Sandy;Karate?;s1e29_77 SpongeBob; Right now? I mean, no! What is this karate? [opens up the basket] Uhh, what do you want on your sandwich? ;s1e29_78 Sandy;Karate.;s1e29_79 SpongeBob; What did you say? ;s1e29_80 Sandy; Uhh, mustard. Mustard! I want mustard on my sandwich. [takes out some mustard] There we go. [SpongeBob pulls out some barnacle loaf] ;s1e29_81 SpongeBob; How many slices of barnacle loaf do you want? ;s1e29_82 Sandy; One. Just one. ;s1e29_83 SpongeBob; One for you! [karate chops a slice off] ;s1e29_84 Sandy;Hmmm?;s1e29_85 SpongeBob; And one for me! [chops off another slice in slow-motion] ;s1e29_86 Sandy; Ohh, uhh, SpongeBob? ;s1e29_87 SpongeBob;Hmm?;s1e29_88 Sandy; Maybe just one more. Uhh, I'm kinda hungry. ;s1e29_89 {system}; [SpongeBob brings out the barnacle loaf again] ;s1e29_90 SpongeBob; Sure thing, Sandy. [lifts up his hand] ;s1e29_91 Sandy;SpongeBob?;s1e29_92 SpongeBob;Yeah?;s1e29_93 Sandy; Do you think, umm, do you think I could cut this one? ;s1e29_94 SpongeBob; Uhh, sure. ;s1e29_95 Sandy; Thanks. Hi-yah! [chops one slice] Is that enough? ;s1e29_96 SpongeBob; Maybe just one more. Or two! ;s1e29_97 Sandy; Or three! ;s1e29_98 SpongeBob; Or ten! ;s1e29_99 Sandy; Ten! Yes, ten! Because we're really hungry! ;s1e29_100 SpongeBob;Right!;s1e29_101 Sandy;Right!;s1e29_102 SpongeBob;Right!;s1e29_103 Sandy; Right! [chops off more slices and they fly everywhere] ;s1e29_104 SpongeBob; Time for buns! [throws a bunch of buns in the air and chops them in half] ;s1e29_105 Sandy; How about some tomatoes? ;s1e29_106 SpongeBob; And I'll cut the cheese! [both throw the cheese and tomatoes in the air while chopping them into a bunch of slices that land on the patties] ;s1e29_107 Sandy; And, what else should we slice? [SpongeBob grabs more buns] ;s1e29_108 SpongeBob; More buns! ;s1e29_109 Sandy; [Sandy grabs two heads of lettuce] And lettuce! ;s1e29_110 Both; Yeah! [both slice up more food to complete their Krabby Patties and one of the buns lands on an earthworm] ;s1e29_111 SpongeBob; Phew. Making sandwiches sure is fun. Right, Sandy? [Sandy has a dazed look on her face] Right? I guess I'll eat one now. [reaches for a patty, but Sandy karate chops his arm with her green foam hand] ;s1e29_112 Sandy; You're mince meat! ;s1e29_113 SpongeBob; [in his red karate gear] In your dreams! Hi-yah! [both start to karate chop each other. Later, Mr. Krabs is walking through the park, carrying an umbrella] ;s1e29_114 Mr. Krabs ; Huh? What the barnacle? [Everything in the park is chopped in half. Sandy is chopping wood while SpongeBob rests on a rock] ;s1e29_115 SpongeBob; Do you think Mr. Krabs ever does karate? ;s1e29_116 Mr. Krabs ; [clearing his throat to get SpongeBob's attention] Bleuhahugh! ;s1e29_117 SpongeBob; [screams] Mr. Krabs! [tries to hold a tree back in one piece] Uhh, hey, Mr. Krabs, how?s it going? [holds the rock in one piece] Nice day, huh? [half of the tree falls on SpongeBob's head] Oh, alright, Mr. Krabs. You caught me. But you know what? I just can't help myself. You're just gonna have to fire me. ;s1e29_118 Mr. Krabs ; Fire ya? [grabs a couple Krabby Patties] I've got something else in mind. [at the Krusty Krab, SpongeBob and Sandy are karate chopping up Krabby Patties for the customers. Sandy is chopping up the meat and SpongeBob is chopping up the mustard] ;s1e29_119 Sandy; I love karate! ;s1e29_120 SpongeBob; I love kara-tay! ;s1e29_121 Squidward; I hate all of you. ;s1e29_122 SpongeBob; Ah, time for bed, Gary. [takes off his shoes and socks and throws them on the floor. The socks, which had been standing upright, slide down into the shoes. Gary sticks his eyes into the shoes, then pulls them out with the socks covering them] ;s1e30_1 Gary;Meow?;s1e30_2 SpongeBob;" Oh, Gary. [pulls socks off Gary's eyes] You know what they say: curiosity salted the snail! Mind your wandering eye, you little mollusk. Sweet dreams, Gary. [snores and a dream cloud appears with the background of Krusty Krab stuff. SpongeBob eyes appear then his shoes and then his mouth on a rock] Hey! Over here! [laughs while his arms wiggle on the ground. Both arms attach to the rock and the rock moves over to the other items. SpongeBob's arms grab the eyes and puts them on the rock, his pants start appearing, and then his legs come out and put his shoes on and his body is seen. A car comes over SpongeBob and sits him in it. SpongeBob's nose grows out] Wait a minute. I don't have a driver's license! [driver's license appears] Wow. My driver's license. I can't believe it! [Car starts to move crazily] I sure take a good picture. [drives through a sign that says ""Road Ends""] Darn! I should have grown a mustache. [the boat starts bumping up and down rapidly SpongeBob is now driving off-road, hitting bumps in the sand he smashes into a rock and flies out of the boat, still holding his license] How could I have forgotten the most important rule of driving? Always wear your seatbelt. [flies over the Krusty Krab] Hey, I can see the Krusty Krab from here. [Mrs. Puff floats up to him] Mrs. Puff! Look! I've finally got my driver's license! ";s1e30_3 Mrs. Puff ; [takes his license and tears it up] Not even in your dreams, Mr. SquarePants! ;s1e30_4 SpongeBob; No! [flies through the dream cloud and on SpongeBob's real bed] Ouch! Where am I? [walks and looks up to his real self] Is that me? Or is this me? Am I still dreaming? ;s1e30_5 Gary; Meow. [snoring] Meow. ;s1e30_6 SpongeBob; [walks up to Gary's dream cloud] This must be Gary's dream. I'm gonna get a closer look. [jumps into the dream cloud. He falls down into a library] Whoa! Wow. Look at all these books. I wonder where Gary is. [walks past a pile of books] Gary! Huh? [sees Gary, who is now taller and wearing a cape, reading a book. He walks up to him] Excuse me, sir. Have you seen...? [Gary turns around] ;s1e30_7 Gary; [gasps] SpongeBob? ;s1e30_8 Gary; How dare you invade the sanctity of my dreams? ;s1e30_9 SpongeBob; Gary! You can talk! ;s1e30_10 Gary; [sighs] In dreams, one is not tethered by earthly limitations. ;s1e30_11 Gary;" Come. [they walk down an aisle of books] For ages, dreams have been thought of as windows to another realm. [picks up a book and reads from it] ""Let me not mar that perfect dream by an auroral stain, but so adjust my daily night that it may come again."" Emily Dickinson wrote that. ";s1e30_12 SpongeBob;Who?;s1e30_13 Gary; [flips a few pages] Here's one you might know. [clears throat] There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night to find that his dream had come true. ;s1e30_14 SpongeBob; [laughs] Gee, Gary, you sure are smart. ;s1e30_15 SpongeBob; Well, thanks for the info, Gary. I'm going back to my own dream now. [starts walking away] ;s1e30_16 Gary; Beware of your wandering eye, you little poriferan! ;s1e30_17 Patrick; Hi, SpongeBob. ;s1e30_18 SpongeBob; [walks over] You know, Patrick, this is a dream. You can do anything you want. ;s1e30_19 Patrick;Yup.;s1e30_20 SpongeBob; I mean anything! Watch. I can turn into a skyscraper. [transforms into the shape of a skyscraper] Going up! Eh? [sees that Patrick is unresponsive and frowns, then perks up again] I can make... [changes back to his normal shape and size, this time with a million copies of himself] A million of me! Eh? Eh? ;s1e30_21 Patrick;Yup.;s1e30_22 {system}; [The SpongeBob clones disappear] ;s1e30_23 SpongeBob; Ah, tartar sauce. I'm going to a different dream. [leaves] ;s1e30_24 Patrick; Okay. Bye, SpongeBob. [kiddie ride comes to a halt Patrick reaches into his pocket and pulls out another quarter and goes to put it in the slot, but accidentally drops it and it rolls away] Oh! [the quarter f he stops below Squidward's dream cloud] alls into a grate] Shoot, that was my last quarter. [sits on the ride with a dull gaze meanwhile, SpongeBob hops out of the dream cloud and starts to walk down the block;s1e30_25 SpongeBob; Ooh, this is gonna be good! [inflates himself with air and floats up into the cloud inside, Squidward is playing clarinet in front of an applauding crowd he is also dressed as Mozart because he has a powdered wig on his head] Psst! Squidward! [waving in the audience Squidward stops playing] Hey, Squidward! ;s1e30_26 King; Ahem! [sitting in the balcony above the stage] Why do you stop playing, Wolfgang Amadeus Tentacles? ;s1e30_27 Squidward; Yes, Your Highness. [Squidward resumes playing, but SpongeBob tells the king a joke. The king laughs and Squidward stops playing again. He angrily stands up] SpongeBob! ;s1e30_28 King; Hey! I have not instructed you to stop! Now play! [giggles, turns to SpongeBob and nudges him with his elbow] Oh, do tell me the one about the man from Peru again. ;s1e30_29 King; [angry] I came here to hear beautiful music! If I don't get my wish, it will be your head! ;s1e30_30 Squidward; [laughs nervously] ;s1e30_31 SpongeBob; [as a clarinet] Squidward! [points to himself and winks] Huh? Huh? ;s1e30_32 Squidward; [throws his broken clarinet pieces off-stage. Speaking with his back turned] No way. ;s1e30_33 King; Ahem! [glares down at Squidward] ;s1e30_34 Squidward; [sighs and picks SpongeBob up] Please, SpongeBob, no tricks. ;s1e30_35 SpongeBob; Trust me, Squidward. [Squidward blows into him] ;s1e30_36 SpongeBob; [off-key] La la! La la la la la la la! [The audience gasps again] ;s1e30_37 Squidward; [stops playing] SpongeBob! ;s1e30_38 {system}; [Squidward smiles and SpongeBob winks at him] ;s1e30_39 SpongeBob; [continues singing off-key] ;s1e30_40 Incidental 127 ; [crying] His music touches me ever-so. I fear that my tears might stain my petticoat. ;s1e30_41 {system}; [crowd cheers] ;s1e30_42 Squidward; [bowing] Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! [the crowd knocks him aside into a fruit wagon and a fish grabs SpongeBob] ;s1e30_43 Incidental 121 ; What is this instrument that produces such lovely sound? ;s1e30_44 SpongeBob; [turns back to normal and runs away while audience chases him. Squidward has climbed out of the wagon and is a mess] So long, Squidward! [Squidward starts to growl at him, but the audience members push him back into the fruit wagon and chase after SpongeBob. The King follows, too, laughing. SpongeBob runs out the door and flies away.] ;s1e30_45 Squidward; [starts tossing and turning in his bed, mumbling in angered pain] ;s1e30_46 SpongeBob; [SpongeBob lands on the top of the tree dome] Hey! I'm at Sandy's! [Sandy sleeps in her tree and SpongeBob jumps in her dream cloud and opens a plane door] Aw, this looks neat! I wonder... [falls out of the plane and screams] ;s1e30_47 Sandy; [surfs up on a glide board to SpongeBob] Hey, SpongeBob, what brings you here? ;s1e30_48 SpongeBob; Hey, Sandy! What's going on? ;s1e30_49 Sandy; [turns upside down] Well, we're free-falling from 114,000 feet, and we're gonna land on that itty-bitty target. [a target is shown on the ground. SpongeBob and Sandy spin around] ;s1e30_50 SpongeBob; This seems kind of dangerous! ;s1e30_51 Sandy; Not as long as you've got a big old parachute! ;s1e30_52 SpongeBob; Okay! [gives her a thumbs-up both his shoes inflate] ;s1e30_53 Sandy; Not a pair of shoes, SpongeBob! Parachute! [turns upside-down again] ;s1e30_54 SpongeBob; Gotcha! [lifts up a green parakeet perched on his finger] ;s1e30_55 Sandy; Not a parakeet! Para- [Lands in a truck of clam manure, parachute inflates out of time] medic... ;s1e30_56 SpongeBob; [screams as he crashes through the target, breaking the ground and flips on the real-life ground] Ouch! All right, that's it. No more messing with people's dreams. [sees a dream cloud coming out of Mr. Krabs' house] H-h-hey! Mr. Krabs. [climbs the anchor house and raises his head right under a pink flower in Pearl's dream. Shows a view of various girly decorations, other girly features and boyfriend portraits.] Uhh... Mr. Krabs? ;s1e30_57 Pearl; Hello, SpongeBob! [sits at a table with a green rabbit toy and a brown teddy bear, she pours some tea into the bear's cup] ;s1e30_58 SpongeBob; [waves] Oh, Pearl. This is your dream. ;s1e30_59 Pearl; You're just in time for the tea party! ;s1e30_60 SpongeBob; Actually, I was looking for your dad's dream. ;s1e30_61 Pearl; [Frowns] Oh. He's next door. [Rolls eyes, then shakes head in disappointment] Boys don't understand the sophistication of tea parties. Right, Mr. Stuffy? ;s1e30_62 SpongeBob; Bye! [gets out of Pearl's dream and goes over to Mr. Krabs on the right side of the screen] I bet Mr. Krabs' dream will be more robust. [peeks in the cloud and just floats on his backside in the large ocean until he hits Mr. Krabs? boat] ;s1e30_63 SpongeBob; Whatcha doin?, Mr. Krabs? ;s1e30_64 SpongeBob; What are you talking about? ;s1e30_65 SpongeBob; [laughs] Look, Mr. Krabs. Pennies! ;s1e30_66 Mr. Krabs ; Never mind the small change, lad. Get the net! ;s1e30_67 Mr. Krabs ; No, no, no, no! The money net! It's in me back pocket. ;s1e30_68 SpongeBob; [reaches into Mr. Krabs' back pocket and pulls out a huge wallet with Mr. Krabs' license in it] Wow! You look real good with a mustache, Mr. Krabs. ;s1e30_69 Mr. Krabs ; Never mind that, boy. Ready the net! ;s1e30_70 SpongeBob; [opens up the wallet] Net ready, sir! ;s1e30_71 Mr. Krabs ; [pulls the dollar out of the water and heaves it into the wallet] I did it! [gets excited] I finally did it! ;s1e30_72 SpongeBob; Congratulations, Mr. Krabs. [puts down the wallet to shake hands with Mr. Krabs, but the wallet starts bouncing away toward the back of the boat] ;s1e30_73 Mr. Krabs ; No, SpongeBob! Don't let it go! ;s1e30_74 SpongeBob;Huh?;s1e30_75 Mr. Krabs ; Get it, SpongeBob! Get it! Get it! Get it! Get it! Get it! [SpongeBob chases after it, but it hops off the back end of the boat] ;s1e30_76 SpongeBob; Hey! Hey! I...! ;s1e30_77 Mr. Krabs ; No! [dollar hops out of wallet and jumps like a dolphin away in the ocean] ;s1e30_78 SpongeBob; [grins nervously as Krabs glares at him] This'll make a great fish story, eh, Mr. Krabs? ;s1e30_79 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, SpongeBob... ;s1e30_80 SpongeBob; Yes, Mr. Krabs? ;s1e30_81 Mr. Krabs ; [ties SpongeBob up with a rope tied to a plunger sticking out of a gun] You're fired! [Fires the gun, shooting the plunger and tossing SpongeBob with it] ;s1e30_82 SpongeBob; [screams as he gets shot out of the dream cloud and into Plankton's dream on a building. The plunger is stuck onto a building.] Ooh! Hey, Plankton's dreaming about Bikini Bottom. ;s1e30_83 Plankton; Zap! [zaps a building near SpongeBob and fish: Incidental 93, Incidental 40, Incidental 86 come running out] I see you. [stomps up to another building, twenty times the size of his normal self] Zap! [shoots a green laser out of his eye] ;s1e30_84 Fred; My leg! ;s1e30_85 Plankton; I see you. Zap! ;s1e30_86 SpongeBob; Plankton! [tries to get himself untied from the rope around his ankle] ;s1e30_87 Plankton; I see you... [SpongeBob gets untied and drops to the ground] Zap! [zaps and disintegrates the building that SpongeBob was on, then walks to the Krusty Krab. People continue to: Fred, and Incidental 73 scream in panic] Oh look, it's the Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty. [stomps on it] Crush! [picks up the Krusty Krab sign and starts to lick it as if it was a lollipop and walks off] Lick, lick! ;s1e30_88 SpongeBob; This isn't a dream! This is a nightmare! ;s1e30_89 Gary; Meow! Meow! ;s1e30_90 SpongeBob; [Stops and looks. Appears more and more worried.] Gary! Gary! No! ;s1e30_91 Gary; Meow! [Plankton still coming towards Gary making giant step sounds] ;s1e30_92 Plankton; Here, kitty, kitty, kitty. ;s1e30_93 SpongeBob; Gary! [jumps over to Gary and hugs him] I've got you, Gary! ;s1e30_94 Plankton; Peek-a-boo, here comes my foot! [steps on SpongeBob and Gary] Yeah! Huh? [lifts his foot from pain] Yow! ;s1e30_95 SpongeBob; [looking like a thumbtack] I think he's got the point. [laughs] ;s1e30_96 Plankton; [starts shrinking] Waaaaaah! [as he screams his voice gets higher and higher until he goes back to his normal, puny size.] ;s1e30_97 {system}; [Immediately after Plankton went back to normal size, three burnt fish: Incidental 93, Incidental 37A, and Fred walk up to Plankton looking mad] ;s1e30_98 Plankton; Well, I guess I've got some explaining to do, huh? ;s1e30_99 {system}; [Burned Fred lifts his foot to step on him] ;s1e30_100 Plankton; No. No, no, no! Not the face! [gets squished. Wakes up screaming and his dream cloud pops, making dream SpongeBob fall to the ground] ;s1e30_101 SpongeBob; Ooh! [SpongeBob walks home into his own dream cloud where his real self is still sleeping] Ah, that was fun and all, but it's good to be back in my own dream cloud. [goes to sleep] Ah... [wakes up after hearing his friends voices and faces hovering around his head] ;s1e30_102 Squidward; [his head starts circling SpongeBob] SpongeBob! [The heads of Mr. Krabs, Sandy, Gary, Plankton, Pearl and Patrick start surrounding SpongeBob] ;s1e30_103 All;SpongeBob!;s1e30_104 SpongeBob; [tossing and turning in his sleep] What do you want from me? Leave me alone! No, no... No, no, no, no, no, no! [Squidward taps him and he wakes up.] ;s1e30_105 Squidward;SpongeBob!;s1e30_106 SpongeBob; [screams, then sees his friends stand around his bed, except Patrick] Hey, what are you all doing in your pajamas? Are we having a slumber party? ;s1e30_107 {system}; [Scene now shows Squidward, Mr. Krabs, Sandy, Gary, Plankton, and Pearl, who all look angry at SpongeBob.] ;s1e30_108 Squidward; No. We are not having a slumber party! ;s1e30_109 Sandy; Do us all a favor, SpongeBob, and stay out of our dreams! ;s1e30_110 All; [grumble in agreement] ;s1e30_111 Plankton; Take a hike! ;s1e30_112 Squidward; Don't we get enough of you during the day? ;s1e30_113 Gary; [In anger] Meow! ;s1e30_114 Patrick; [walks in] Does anyone have a quarter? [all stare at Patrick] ;s1e30_115 {system}; [The episode begins at nighttime. The screen zooms in to SpongeBob's house.] ;s1e31_1 SpongeBob; [is asleep in bed and dreaming that he is standing on a giant Krabby Patty, then black storm clouds roll in and it starts raining Krabby Patties. One falls into his hands] Ah! It's raining Krabby Patties! Yeah! [runs around eating patties. Dream ends. SpongeBob wakes up to find himself chewing on his pillow.] Huh? [spits the pillow out and his stomach growls] A quick midnight snack and then it's back to bed. [kicks the pillow on the ground and jumps on it. Sees Gary meowing in his sleep] Aww, sleep tight, my little angel. [tiptoes past Gary. He tries to get down the stairs without waking up Gary but rushes down, making a xylophone sound] Ah, here it is. [grabs a jar of seanut butter out of the refrigerator and walks to the table where he makes a sandwich] Nothing like a sea-nut butter and jellyfish jelly sandwich to help you get to sleep. [as soon as SpongeBob takes a bite of the sandwich, he falls asleep. Behind him, the fridge is still open, letting out all the cold air. That morning, his whole house is frozen. Even the man on TV is shivering. The foghorn alarm clock goes off, breaking the ice around it, the bed, and the pillow. SpongeBob wakes up shivering and gasps as he breaks out of the ice he is encased in] The fridge! [slides up to the fridge, quavering, and closes it, then sits down trying to get warm. He tries to stand up, but he slips and slides everywhere inside and outside the house, breaking all the windows before stopping on his bed. He pulls his frozen blanket over him, but it shatters] ;s1e31_2 Gary; [wearing a hat and ear muffs] Meow. ;s1e31_3 SpongeBob; [slides into the bathroom] Oh, Gary, I don't feel like myself. ;s1e31_4 Gary;Meow.;s1e31_5 SpongeBob; Don't be silly, Gary. I don't get colds. I get the suds. ;s1e31_6 Gary;Meow?;s1e31_7 SpongeBob; No, Gary. If I had the suds, I'd have bubbles coming outta me. [sneezes, then pink bubbles come out of him then he moans exhaustingly] ;s1e31_8 SpongeBob; I can't get the suds, [sniffles] because then I'll have to miss work! [puts his underwear over his mouth and nose then sneezes. Pink bubbles come out again] ;s1e31_9 Gary;Meow.;s1e31_10 SpongeBob; No, Gary. I like wearing my underwear like this. [turns around and has two bubbles representing his glutes. Each one pops] ;s1e31_11 SpongeBob; I'm not sick. I'm going to work. [Regular bubbles transition to the Krusty Krab, where SpongeBob is cooking. He sneezes loudly with pink bubbles and he pulls his hat over his head to muffle it. Mr. Krabs comes into the kitchen] ;s1e31_12 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob, what's holding up those patties? [SpongeBob turns around looking pale] ;s1e31_13 SpongeBob; [weakly, visibly shaking] Right away, sir. ;s1e31_14 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob, what's wrong with you? You're paler than a baby sea horse. [Gary appears out of nowhere] ;s1e31_15 Mr. Krabs ; The suds? ;s1e31_16 SpongeBob; [holds up the Krabby Patty on a plate] Here's that patty you wanted, Mr. Krabs, sir. [sneezes loudly with bubbles and causing the patty to splatter all over Mr. Krabs' face] ;s1e31_17 Mr. Krabs ; [wipes the patty off his face] Alright, SpongeBob, you're too sick to work. ;s1e31_18 SpongeBob; No, Mr. Krabs, I'm okay, honest. [Mr. Krabs opens the front door] ;s1e31_19 Mr. Krabs ; No, now go home and get some rest. [SpongeBob walks off] Nothing personal, lad. I just can't have you sneezing all over my food. [Incidental 23, Incidental 31, and other customers overhear Mr. Krabs and they spit out their food and panic] ;s1e31_20 Fred; My leg! ;s1e31_21 Mr. Krabs ; No, wait! Wait! [All the customers scramble out of the Krusty Krab. Regular bubbles transition back to SpongeBob's house. SpongeBob is in his chair.] ;s1e31_22 SpongeBob; Oh, Gary, I feel horrible. [sneezes. Gary hides in his shell with pink bubbles all over his shell. Gary has an angry expression when he shows his eyes] Oh, who am I kidding, Gary? I've got the suds, no doubt about it. [after he sneezes again, his right eye rolls down his face] I'd better take care of this before it gets out of hand. [picks up the phone and dials Sandy's number] ;s1e31_23 Sandy; [running on her exercise wheel] Hello? ;s1e31_24 SpongeBob; Sandy, I'm sick. [puts his eye back into place] Can you escort me to the doctor's? ;s1e31_25 Sandy; Oh, sure, SpongeBob. I'll be over there faster than a barefoot jackrabbit on a hot greasy griddle in the middle of August in... ;s1e31_26 SpongeBob; Yeah, okay, Sandy, thanks. [sneezes pink bubbles through Sandy's phone. Later, as SpongeBob is getting dressed for the doctor, the doorbell rings] Coming. [opens the door] ;s1e31_27 SpongeBob; I'm sick, Patrick. I'm going to the doctor. ;s1e31_28 Patrick; What? Oh, you can't go! ;s1e31_29 SpongeBob; Why not, Patrick? ;s1e31_30 SpongeBob; [sits in his chair] It can't be as horrible as the suds. [sneezes] ;s1e31_31 Patrick; Oh, it is, SpongeBob! Well, first, they make you sit in the waiting room. ;s1e31_32 SpongeBob; Is that the horrible part, Patrick? [Gary appears beside the chair] ;s1e31_33 Patrick; No, it gets worse. They make you read old magazines! [SpongeBob gasps. Patrick takes a piece of coral for a stethoscope] Then the doctor pulls out his stethoscope! ;s1e31_34 SpongeBob;No!;s1e31_35 Patrick; Yes. It's a device so sinister, so icy cold when it touches your bare flesh, it... [takes the end of the piece of coral and puts it on SpongeBob's chest] Ssssss! [SpongeBob shoots up toward the ceiling and panics all over the place] ;s1e31_36 SpongeBob; No, no! No stethoscope, no doctor, no old magazines, no ssssss! No! [flips over on the floor] Patrick, I don't wanna go to the doctor! ;s1e31_37 Patrick; Exactly! [SpongeBob sneezes. A pink bubble is in the place where Patrick's nose should be, then it pops] ;s1e31_38 SpongeBob; You gotta help me get better, Patrick. Please? Would you like to be my doctor, Patrick? ;s1e31_39 SpongeBob; I don't know. [sneezes more and more, which after every sneeze he inflates] ;s1e31_40 Patrick; Help, I'm shrinking! [SpongeBob breaks the table] No! Please don't hurt me! ;s1e31_41 SpongeBob; No bubbles! Patrick, your treatment is working! ;s1e31_42 Patrick; You think so? ;s1e31_43 SpongeBob; Sure! At this rate, I'll be cured in no time! In fact, I'm gonna call Sandy and tell her not to come! Thanks, Dr. Patrick! ;s1e31_44 Patrick; And they said I'd never make anything out of myself. ;s1e31_45 SpongeBob; [tries to press one button, but it pressed all because his fingers are too large] My fingers are too big for the buttons. [off-hook tone plays] Dr. Patrick, will you call Sandy for me? [gives Patrick the phone] ;s1e31_46 Patrick; Sure, patient SpongeBob! [Patrick calls Sandy, who is about to head out for SpongeBob's place] Hello, Sandy? ;s1e31_47 Sandy; Hiya, Patrick! ;s1e31_48 Patrick; I'm calling on behalf of my patient, SpongeBob. ;s1e31_49 Sandy; I'm on my way over to take him to the hospital. ;s1e31_50 Patrick; Uhh, uhh, that will no longer be required! He is in my care as of today. ;s1e31_51 Sandy; Well, I'm coming over to take a look. I'll be over there faster than a barefoot jackrabbit on a hot... ;s1e31_52 Patrick; Oh, yeah, yeah, the rabbit. Don't bother, Sandy! [hangs up] Oh, SpongeBob, quick, Sandy's coming! Ah! We've got to make sure you're well, or she'll take you to the doctor! [runs into the kitchen with rubber gloves on and dips them into the sink of water] Don't touch me, I'm sterile! [Sud bubbles transition.] Scalpel, please. [takes some sea-nut butter and spreads it on SpongeBob's right foot. Then puts a piece of bread and put sea-nut butter on each side and his shoe on it] Feeling better? ;s1e31_53 SpongeBob; Uh-uh. [Sud bubbles transition. A string is attached to a door that Patrick closes. A tooth shoots out from the side] ;s1e31_54 Patrick; Feeling better yet? ;s1e31_55 SpongeBob; [missing the tooth] Not really. [Sud bubbles transition.] ;s1e31_56 Patrick; [wearing a leotard and jumping on SpongeBob] How... about... now? ;s1e31_57 SpongeBob; I don't... think so. [Sud bubbles transition. Patrick puts a large bandage vertically on SpongeBob's back] ;s1e31_58 Patrick; Feeling better? ;s1e31_59 SpongeBob; No. [Patrick rips the bandage off while SpongeBob screams. Patrick reapplies the bandage horizontally] ;s1e31_60 Patrick; How about now? ;s1e31_61 SpongeBob; Nope. [Patrick rips the bandage off again as SpongeBob screams and horizontally reapplies again] ;s1e31_62 Patrick; How about now? ;s1e31_63 SpongeBob; Uh-uh. [Patrick rips the bandage off a third time as SpongeBob screams. The scene cuts to Bikini Atoll. Later, Sandy arrives outside SpongeBob's house] ;s1e31_64 Patrick; [wears a brown executioner's mask on his head] Uh-oh, it's Sandy. [SpongeBob is tied onto a medieval torture rack. He sneezes and enlarges himself into a ball. Sandy knocks on the door] There's no one home. ;s1e31_65 Patrick; Uhh, uhh, he's not here at the moment. Please leave a message after the beep. Beep. ;s1e31_66 Patrick; Since I ran out of space to put my stuff. ;s1e31_67 Sandy; Uh-huh. Yeah. Since when does your house have feet? [SpongeBob's feet are sticking out of the other rock] ;s1e31_68 SpongeBob; Hiya, Sandy. ;s1e31_69 Patrick; [holding SpongeBob's hand] Hmmm, the dirt therapy seems to be working just fine. ;s1e31_70 Sandy; Patrick, SpongeBob has to see a real doctor. ;s1e31_71 Patrick; No, he doesn't! I'm taking good care of him! Show her, SpongeBob! Say 'ahh'. ;s1e31_72 SpongeBob; Ahh... [exhales a green gas that kills all the plants, clams, and everything else in its path] ;s1e31_73 Sandy; See? He's even worse than I thought. ;s1e31_74 Patrick; [wearing a clothespin on his nose] What do you mean? He's fine. [Sandy snatches the clothespin off of his nose] ;s1e31_75 SpongeBob; I'm okay, Sandy, really. [sneezes again, enlarging himself more] ;s1e31_76 Sandy; I'm taking you to the doctor right now! [rolls SpongeBob away] ;s1e31_77 Patrick; Hey, that's my patient! [runs over and pushes SpongeBob the opposite way] You can't take him to the doctor's! ;s1e31_78 Sandy; [rolling SpongeBob the other way again] Don't be silly, Patrick! ;s1e31_79 Patrick; [carrying SpongeBob the other way] He's mine! [Sandy is log rolling SpongeBob the opposite way] ;s1e31_80 Sandy; SpongeBob, you'll be better soon. [Patrick is using a wheelbarrow for SpongeBob] ;s1e31_81 Patrick; I'll save you! [Sandy is using SpongeBob as a basketball] ;s1e31_82 SpongeBob; I'm better, guys! Really! [Sandy and Patrick both push him into each other, squeezing him until he launches into the air] ;s1e31_83 Sandy; Now look what you've done, Patrick! ;s1e31_84 Patrick; What I've done? Everything was fine until you showed up! ;s1e31_85 Sandy; You should be arrested for impersonating a doctor! ;s1e31_86 Patrick; Hey! I'm a good doctor! Right, SpongeBob? [SpongeBob comes down and rolls away] ;s1e31_87 SpongeBob;Guys!;s1e31_88 Sandy;Huh?;s1e31_89 Patrick;SpongeBob?;s1e31_90 SpongeBob; I can't stop! [screams while he rolls down a hill] Help me! [Mr. Krabs is cleaning some dimes] ;s1e31_91 Mr. Krabs ; Shiny dimes. ;s1e31_92 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs! ;s1e31_93 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob? [runs out the front doors] Stop, SpongeBob! Stop...! [SpongeBob stops just in time. Mr. Krabs sighs in relief until SpongeBob sneezes so hard that he releases a cloud of pink bubbles that fill the screen and destroy the Krusty Krab. Mr. Krabs glares at SpongeBob, who returns to his normal size. Later, at the hospital] ;s1e31_94 Incidental 116 ; Well, Mr. SquarePants, it seems you have the suds. Are you ready for your treatment? ;s1e31_95 SpongeBob; [sniffles and shakes his head] You're not going to make me read old magazines, are you? ;s1e31_96 Incidental 116 ; No, silly! You get the sponge treatment! Oh, Hans! [a real hand comes through the door and takes SpongeBob out of the room. Then it shows the hand cleaning SpongeBob with soap] ;s1e31_97 SpongeBob; Whoo! Yeah! Whoo! [Hans is using real SpongeBob to rub a man (played by Tom Kenny)'s back in the shower] That tickles! [Hans uses real SpongeBob to scrub a man's feet. SpongeBob sniffs] I can smell again! [Then the real SpongeBob being used to wash a plate, a car and the floor] Whoo! Yeah! Yeah-eah! Whoo! Yeah! [SpongeBob being rinsed off in the sink and put back in the doctor's room. Then SpongeBob turns back into his normal, yellow color] I feel as good as new! I love the doctor! ;s1e31_98 Hans; Here's your lollipop. [hands SpongeBob a big lollipop. Sandy winks at SpongeBob] ;s1e31_99 Patrick; A lollipop? [takes a bubble wand, blows a bubble, then hides the wand behind his back] Hey, Doc! I’ve got the suds, too! ;s1e31_100 Incidental 116 ; [sarcastically] Oh, yes, Doctor Patrick. We have a special treatment for you. [A chuckling Patrick gets taken away by Hans] ;s1e31_101 Patrick; [He's being washed in the sink with soap] Hey! Hey, wait! [used on a cactus] Wha-ouch! That hurts! [being used to scrub a toilet] Wait, uh, this doesn't seem right! [The screen fades to black marking the end of the episode.] ;s1e31_102 SpongeBob; [opens his house door with a bunch of hearts in his arms] Happy Valentine's Day, Bikini Bottom! [throws hearts everywhere] ;s1e32_1 Montage; SpongeBob hands a heart to Squidward, but he rudely tears it up. He gives one to Mrs. Puff, but her boat runs into a fire hydrant. He gives Plankton a tiny heart using tweezers. SpongeBob leaps over to Sandy's place] ;s1e32_2 Sandy; Happy Valentine's Day, SpongeBob. I'm nuts for you. [gets out an acorn nut with an arrow stuck through it] ;s1e32_3 SpongeBob; [puts the acorn away and takes out a bottle of chocolate syrup] Well, I'm bubbles for you, Sandy. [blows a chocolate heart bubble] ;s1e32_4 Sandy; [opens a door on her helmet for the chocolate heart to go into, sticks her tongue out and closes her eyes, the chocolate heart lands and pops on her tongue as she eats it, and she licks her lips] Mmmm, chocolate. Mighty tasty. Patrick's gonna love the one you made for him. [a big chocolate hot air balloon with Patrick on it is shown and then SpongeBob and Sandy run over and Sandy gets into the basket] Take me through the plan again. ;s1e32_5 SpongeBob; Okay. [SpongeBob blows a chocolate carnival] Step one: [manly voice] Patrick and I get to the Valentine's Day carnival. [a chocolate SpongeBob and Patrick fly in and hop onto the carnival] Step two: I position Patrick and myself on top of the Ferris wheel. [both of them hop over to the Ferris wheel where it rides up to the top. Blows a chocolate hot air balloon] Step three: You arrive at designated checkpoint for maximum visual contact. [the balloon floats over above the carnival] Step four: Patrick is thrilled. Mission accomplished. [chocolate bursts all over the screen] ;s1e32_6 {system}; [Cuts to Patrick with a Valentine's Day shirt and putting a big rock on the ground and pounds the rock into the shape of a heart and picks it up] ;s1e32_7 SpongeBob; [walks up behind Patrick] Hi, Patrick. ;s1e32_8 SpongeBob; Patrick, it's me, SpongeBob. ;s1e32_9 Patrick; SpongeBob, what are you doing in there? ;s1e32_10 SpongeBob;Patrick!;s1e32_11 SpongeBob;Patrick...;s1e32_12 Patrick; SpongeBob! [cries and rubs the pile of dirt against the side of his face] SpongeBob...! ;s1e32_13 SpongeBob; Patrick, I'm right behind you! [Patrick turns around] ;s1e32_14 Patrick; There you are. [holds the pile of dirt in his hands] Happy Valentine's Day! Here's your present. ;s1e32_15 Patrick; You do? ;s1e32_16 SpongeBob; It's the greatest... [Patrick gets excited] ...the bestest... [Patrick gets more excited] ...the most fantabulous... [Patrick gets even more excited] ...present ever! [bounces and rolls all around all excited and overjoyed] But you can't have it yet. [Patrick stops rolling and bouncing around] ;s1e32_17 Patrick; Huh? Why not? ;s1e32_18 SpongeBob; Because it's not ready yet. ;s1e32_19 Patrick; Is it ready now? ;s1e32_20 SpongeBob; Not yet. ;s1e32_21 Patrick; How about now? ;s1e32_22 SpongeBob; Do you want to ruin the surprise? ;s1e32_23 Patrick;Yes!;s1e32_24 SpongeBob;Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh!;s1e32_25 Patrick; Oh, come on, please! ;s1e32_26 SpongeBob; Hmmm...nope, sorry. ;s1e32_27 SpongeBob; No can do! [laughs] You'll just have to wait! [walks off with Patrick still hanging on his legs and feet] ;s1e32_28 Patrick; Please. Oh please... [still hanging on his legs we see SpongeBob walking through the middle of nowhere] ...please-please-please-please. Tell me-tell me-tell me. Please?! ;s1e32_29 SpongeBob; Okay, Patrick, here we are. ;s1e32_30 SpongeBob; It's not the carnival. ;s1e32_31 Patrick;Oh.;s1e32_32 SpongeBob; [takes a quarter out of his pocket] Here, why don't you take this quarter and... ;s1e32_33 Patrick; [snatches it from SpongeBob] Oh my gosh, a quarter! I've always wanted a quarter! ;s1e32_34 SpongeBob; It's not the quarter. ;s1e32_35 Patrick;Oh.;s1e32_36 SpongeBob; Now, take that quarter and buy some cotton candy... [Patrick interrupts and SpongeBob's finger deflates] ;s1e32_37 Patrick; Cotton candy! I can't believe it! [chases the cotton candy seller] Cotton candy! ;s1e32_38 SpongeBob; Ten-four, Sandy, SpongeBob here. [we see Sandy closing in with the balloon on the carnival] ;s1e32_39 Sandy; [floating toward the carnival in the balloon] I got a visual on the carnival. You want me to bring her in? ;s1e32_40 SpongeBob; Ohh, not yet, Sandy. Patrick's still trying to guess what his Valentine is. ;s1e32_41 Sandy; [chuckles] You are such a kidder. Sandy out. That SpongeBob... [a group of orange flying oysters are heading toward the balloon] Scallops...chocolate-eating scallops! ;s1e32_42 Patrick; So if it's not cotton candy, then what is it? I can't take it! ;s1e32_43 SpongeBob; You'll have to guess! ;s1e32_44 Patrick; [points at a tent] This tent? ;s1e32_45 SpongeBob;No.;s1e32_46 Patrick; [holds up Incidental 111 who is waiting in line for Heart-A-Whirl] This guy? ;s1e32_47 SpongeBob; No. [we see micro-organisms crawling around it's Patrick's view through a microscope] ;s1e32_48 Patrick; This paramecium? ;s1e32_49 SpongeBob; [laughs] Nope. ;s1e32_50 Patrick; [giggles] Heh, you're a sly one. I can't find here in the carnival...because it's on top of Mount 'Climb Up and Fall Off'. [runs up the mountain and falls off then runs back to SpongeBob] It wasn't there either! ;s1e32_51 SpongeBob; Are you sure? [runs up the mountain and falls off again SpongeBob uses his walkie-talkie to tell Sandy something] SpongeBob to Sandy, you can bring it in now. [Sandy is using a whip to shoo the scallops away] ;s1e32_52 Sandy; Uhh, SpongeBob, we got ourselves a little problem. I got a pack of chocolate-eating scallops trying to rustle the balloon! Hi-yah! Get away, you sweet-toothed varmints! Hi-yah! I'm going to be a little late! ;s1e32_53 SpongeBob; [gets worried] Late? But what about... [Patrick still jumping on and off mountain] ...Patrick? ;s1e32_54 Sandy; Hing-ya! Take him up to the Ferris wheel and I'll meet you there! Sandy out! ;s1e32_55 SpongeBob; [puts away the walkie-talkie] If Patrick doesn't get his valentine... [screams] ;s1e32_56 Patrick; [suddenly appears from behind, all bruised] I'm pretty sure it's not up there, SpongeBob! ;s1e32_57 SpongeBob; Patrick! Uhh, actually it's on the Ferris... ;s1e32_58 Patrick; Ferris wheel! [grabs SpongeBob and runs toward it cut to them on the Ferris wheel being brought to the top] I'm ready for the greatest Valentine's present in the whole world now, SpongeBob. ;s1e32_59 SpongeBob; Well, this is where you're gonna get it...I hope. Just keep looking out there, pal. [SpongeBob talks to Sandy again on the walkie-talkie] SpongeBob to Sandy, SpongeBob to Sandy, come in, Sandy! [Sandy is still fighting the chocolate eating scallops] ;s1e32_60 Sandy; Sandy to SpongeBob, I got my ox in a ditch here! I'm way off course! The scallops are eating the balloon! They're everywhere! [One scallop bites the balloon and the air goes out and it floats down] Aw, shoot! We're going down, SpongeBob! Switch to plan B! ;s1e32_61 SpongeBob; [shocked] No, no, B, Sandy! No, B! [Patrick is smiling big waiting for his surprise] Uh, Patrick, you know how sometimes you plan something special and things don't just work out? ;s1e32_62 Patrick; No...no...eh-gee! Holy mackerel! Is it hot up here or what?! [rips off his shirt and moves the ferries wheel seats back and forth and then up and down. Next, the Ferris wheel is jumping up and down and then SpongeBob puts out his hand/arm] ;s1e32_63 Patrick; What's that? ;s1e32_64 Patrick; A handshake? That's the big gift? You got me a handshake? ;s1e32_65 {system}; [Pause Patrick shakes SpongeBob's hand, stares at it, and makes a grumpy looking face. SpongeBob laughs and the Ferris wheel descends. Montage: At the Buddy Bounce, SpongeBob is happily jumping while Patrick is still looking at his hand with the same grumpy look. At the roller coaster, SpongeBob is happily raising his hands while Patrick is still looking at his hand with the same grumpy look. At the fun house, SpongeBob is happily jumping as the air blows his entire body upwards while Patrick is simply grumpily walking as the air just blows his pants. Bubble transition to them sitting in the bench.] ;s1e32_66 Patrick; [sighs and stops grumpily looking at his hand] I've been thinking. At first, a handshake doesn't seem like much, but really it's the thought that counts… [Incidental 8 walks up with a box shaped like a heart full of chocolates in her arms] ;s1e32_67 SpongeBob; Uh, no problem, Fran. [Incidental 8 walks off] ;s1e32_68 Patrick; And even though I was expecting more... [Incidental 42 with roses walks up] ;s1e32_69 Incidental 42 ; Thanks for the roses, SpongeBob. Happy Valentine's Day. ;s1e32_70 SpongeBob; You too, Dave. [Incidental 42 walks off] ;s1e32_71 Patrick; And not that it matters that we've been friends for so long... [Incidental 49 walks by with a bike] ;s1e32_72 Incidental 49 ; Hey, SpongeBob, thanks for the bike! [talking to Patrick] Can you believe this guy? I just met him this morning! [Incidental 49 walks away, and Patrick begins to fume] ;s1e32_73 Patrick; So, as I was saying... ;s1e32_74 Incidental 27 ; Excuse me, do you guys have the time? ;s1e32_75 Patrick; [turns red in anger, snaps and yells with rage, which is followed by him picking up and throwing Incidental 27 across the screen, shocking SpongeBob] Patrick needs love, too! [Patrick goes psycho freaky. A crashing sound is heard. He furiously bangs his stomach like a gorilla, grunts angrily as he runs closer towards the screen, angrily approaches a balloon cart, then furiously cuts the balloon strings from a salesman and furiously smashes the balloon cart with his buttocks. Cut to scene where children play with a guy in a heart suit the children run off as Patrick approaches] I defy you, Heart man! [Patrick angrily rips the suit in half and continues his rampage] ;s1e32_76 PASystem; Attention everyone, there's a chubby pink starfish on the loose! [everyone runs screaming Patrick sees a twirl-around ride that has hearts on it and goes mad over it] ;s1e32_77 Patrick; Heart on stick must die! [goes to the pole and tries to pick it up gives up eventually in tiredness Patrick sees Incidental 141 eating a heart-shaped lollipop and turns red in anger] Heart on stick must die! [grabs it, breaks it, and stuffs it in his mouth. Incidental 141 screams as Patrick takes the lollipop.] ;s1e32_78 SpongeBob; [gasps gets mad] Patrick! ;s1e32_79 Patrick; [turns around with an evil look on his face angrily grumbles gibberish in a barbaric manner, making everyone scared and run to a dead-end at the Goo Lagoon dock Patrick roars with rage] Huaaagh! ;s1e32_80 {system}; [Everyone gets scared.] ;s1e32_81 Patrick; Give me SpongeBob! [SpongeBob is thrown in front of the group of citizens] ;s1e32_82 SpongeBob; [laughs nervously] ;s1e32_83 Patrick; You broke my heart! Now I'm gonna break something of yours! ;s1e32_84 SpongeBob; Okay, Patrick, I know I deserve this. [notes the crowd] But, do they? ;s1e32_85 Patrick; They didn't get me anything either! [They throw a pile of gifts at Patrick's feet] Nope, it's too late for that now... for all of you! ;s1e32_86 {system}; [He walks onto and over the gifts, about to kill everyone, starting with SpongeBob. The citizens take a step back and SpongeBob is scared Patrick's shadow looms over SpongeBob's horrified face as he prepares to face the inevitable as Patrick roars and growls evilly. Suddenly, Sandy arrives just in time behind Patrick with the repaired balloon and whipping at the scallops] ;s1e32_87 Sandy; Yee-haw! Get along, little shellfish! Gallop, you scallops! [whipping the scallops as she lands in the carnival with the balloon right behind Patrick and letting the scallops go] ;s1e32_88 SpongeBob; [smiles, relieved] Yeah! Sandy's here! Woo-hoo! Look, Patrick, it's here! It's here! The best Valentine in the whole wide world is right behind you! [jumping up and down pointing behind Patrick] ;s1e32_89 Patrick; [ignores SpongeBob] Sure it is. ;s1e32_90 SpongeBob; [jumping] I'm telling you, it's right there! Turn around! ;s1e32_91 Patrick;Uh-uh.;s1e32_92 SpongeBob; [desperately] Patrick, just turn around! [Patrick still wouldn't listen. Everyone is yelling at Patrick to turn around, but he doesn't] ;s1e32_93 Crowd; Turn around! You nincompoop! Why you! ;s1e32_94 Patrick; You must think I'm pretty dumb, huh? ;s1e32_95 Crowd; Yes! Turn around! ;s1e32_96 Patrick;No.;s1e32_97 Crowd; [chanting] Turn around! Turn around! ;s1e32_98 Patrick; Nuh-uh. I'm gonna say this once and I'm not going to say it again, so pay attention. I am not, I repeat, not going to turn around for any reason...ever! ;s1e32_99 Sandy; Howdy, Patrick! ;s1e32_100 Patrick; [turns around] Hi, Sandy! [notices the chocolate balloon, then is confused and speaks gibberish] ;s1e32_101 SpongeBob; Happy Valentine's Day, Patrick! [Patrick jumps for joy and jumps on the balloon] ;s1e32_102 Patrick; Yay! My valentine! Hey, is this solid chocolate? ;s1e32_103 SpongeBob; Patrick, no! [Patrick bites the balloon and chocolate explodes everywhere. SpongeBob and Patrick are in the mess] ;s1e32_104 Patrick; Aw, SpongeBob... you didn't have to get me anything. ;s1e32_105 {system}; [The episode opens with Squidward coming out of his house, setting up a lawn chair, and sitting in it] ;s1e33_1 Squidward; Ah, time to relax. [takes out some gum and puts it in his mouth. Throws the gum wrapper away in front of SpongeBob's house. SpongeBob's pineapple moves forward closer to the wrapper and he opens the door] ;s1e33_2 SpongeBob; [gasps] Squidward! ;s1e33_3 Squidward; [spits out the gum] Well, time to go. [folds up the lawn chair and walks to his front door, but SpongeBob stops him] ;s1e33_4 SpongeBob; Squidward! Squidward, wait! ;s1e33_5 Squidward; Now what? ;s1e33_6 SpongeBob; You dropped this little piece of paper. ;s1e33_7 Squidward; Yeah, so what? ;s1e33_8 Squidward; What's the big deal? It's only garbage. ;s1e33_9 SpongeBob; Garbage?! But, Squidward, in the right hands, this paper is a gold mine of entertainment. A spectacular afternoon of underwater fun. A treasure trove of... ;s1e33_10 Squidward; ...garbage! [walks inside his house] ;s1e33_11 Squidward; Right. [closes door] ;s1e33_12 SpongeBob; Does that mean I can have it? ;s1e33_13 Squidward; Yes, by all means, take it! [the phone rings. Picks it up] Hello? ;s1e33_14 SpongeBob; You sure? ;s1e33_15 SpongeBob; So are you definitely, positively sure? ;s1e33_16 Squidward; Get out! ;s1e33_17 SpongeBob; But are you... ;s1e33_18 Squidward; [screaming] Get out! [gets SpongeBob out] ;s1e33_19 SpongeBob; Last chance to change your mind, Squidward. ;s1e33_20 Squidward; Take it, SpongeBob. Take it, please. And promise me, no matter how much I may beg, and plead, and cry, don't give that paper back to me...ever! ;s1e33_21 SpongeBob; So, I take that as a possible no? Squidward? Squidward? Squidward? [Squidward closes the door] Okay, Squidward, that's a promise I'll just have to keep. Ah, Mr. Paper, I am so lucky to have a friend like Squidward. ;s1e33_22 Squidward; [walking up to his clarinet] SpongeBob... [SpongeBob is laughing outside. Squidward tries to play his clarinet, but Squidward gets annoyed by SpongeBob's laughter, so he peeks out the window] What in the world are you giggling about? ;s1e33_23 SpongeBob; I'm sorry, Squidward, it's just... [giggles] ...it's just that I'm thinking of all the fun I'm going to have with this piece of paper! [Squidward walks back and picks up his clarinet] ;s1e33_24 Squidward; How can anyone have fun with just a piece of paper? [plays his clarinet, but has to stop due to SpongeBob's laughter continuing] Ohh...what can he possibly be doing with that paper?! [peeks out his window again and SpongeBob is running around with the piece of paper high, above his head] ;s1e33_25 SpongeBob; La, la, la, la, la. Gary, watch this! [twists his lower part of his body around and puts the piece of paper in it so it hangs out. Turns his lower body around] Guess what I am. ;s1e33_26 Gary;Meow.;s1e33_27 Squidward; Super-moron's more like it. ;s1e33_28 SpongeBob; Now I'm... [jumps into the air out of his pants. He is now naked with a paper for a loincloth] SpongeBob JunglePants! [does Tarzan impression] ;s1e33_29 Squidward; Oh, boy. ;s1e33_30 SpongeBob; Ugh. SpongeBob JunglePants summon animal friends. [roars like a lion, makes bird calls, makes a raspberry, makes horn noises, dolphin noises and seal noises] ;s1e33_31 Gary;Meow.;s1e33_32 SpongeBob; You're right, Gary. I'm not a jungle boy. I'm a box of army supplies, [jumps off his pineapple with his clothes back on] bringing relief to the hungry troops! [has the paper act as a parachute and floats down to the ground. We see Squidward watching from a safe distance] Landing just in time for the bullfight! [waves the paper in front of Gary] Toro, toro, Gary! Toro, toro! Toro, Gary, toro... [pushes Gary across with his foot] Hey, ole! Now for some impressions. A guy with a mustache. [puts the piece of paper over his upper lip, where a mustache would be] Look at me, I'm a guy with a mustache. A pirate with an eye patch. [puts the paper over one of his eyes] Arrgh, I'm a pirate. A regular guy with an eye patch. [puts the paper over his eye again] Arrgh, I am not a pirate. ;s1e33_33 Squidward; Do a big yellow idiot with a stupid piece of paper. [SpongeBob is rolling the piece of paper on the top of his head. Then he sucks in the paper through one of his holes. Blows it in and out of his holes] How did he do that? ;s1e33_34 SpongeBob; Look, Gary, oral-gami. [puts the paper in his mouth and sticks his tongue out with a bird shape for the paper] ;s1e33_35 Kids; Bird! Yay! [SpongeBob does it again and comes out as a snowflake] Snowflake, yay! [SpongeBob does it again and comes out as a doll] Paper dolls, yay! ;s1e33_36 Squidward;" Hey, that little paper does seem like fun. [puts his hand over his mouth] What am I saying?! I am such an idiot. [laughs] SpongeBob, honestly, and his dumb paper. He calls that fun? [goes back home, opens up a magazine and starts reading it] Now, reading 'Boring Science Digest,' that's fun. [laughs at what the magazine says inside] Erosion. [laughs] Mitosis. [SpongeBob laughs. Later, Squidward is bathing] See, I can have fun taking a bath. [the paper comes flying through the window as an airplane and flies around Squidward a couple times as SpongeBob makes airplane noises. The paper then pauses mid-flight to ""shoot"" a rubber duck in the tub as SpongeBob imitates a machine gun before it flies back out the window. The rubber duck sinks under the water. Later, Squidward is painting] Painting fruit, there's nothing more fun than painting fruit. This is more fun than anything. [SpongeBob is laughing outside. Squidward paints, but he paints himself with the piece of paper over his nose. When he notices this, he tears up his painting] I'll prove to him that paper is not fun! [runs outside and whistles while playing paddleball] I'm having fun, la-la-la... ";s1e33_37 SpongeBob; [bouncing the piece of paper off his nose like it was a paddleball] Isn't this great? La-la-la-la-la... [jumps up and down] La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la... ;s1e33_38 Squidward; What? What did you...? [SpongeBob laughs] ;s1e33_39 SpongeBob; Oh, that's a good one, Squidward, now let me try. [folds the paper in half] Have you heard any good jokes, Mr. Paper? ;s1e33_40 Paper; What happened to the paper that fell in the ocean? ;s1e33_41 SpongeBob; I don't know, what happened to the paper that fell in the ocean? ;s1e33_42 Paper; It was all washed up! [a bunch of people come up and laugh with SpongeBob then leave. Squidward runs off] ;s1e33_43 SpongeBob; La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la... [Cut to later that day, where Squidward is seen riding a shell mobile] ;s1e33_44 Squidward; Haha, I'm having so much fun with my new shell-cart. Ah-haha. Hey, SpongeBob, can your stupid paper do this? [SpongeBob comes down with the paper acting as the propellers of a helicopter] ;s1e33_45 SpongeBob; Nope. [flies away while Squidward drives his shell-cart through the side of his house. Then he comes out with his clarinet] ;s1e33_46 Squidward; Well, you can't play music with a piece of paper! [plays 'Mary Had a Little Lamb' off-key. Little black musical note symbols fall out of the clarinet as he plays] ;s1e33_47 SpongeBob; [applauding] Hooray! Hooray! That was great, Squidward. All those wrong notes you played made it sound more original. ;s1e33_48 Squidward; What? I didn't play any wrong notes. [plays the song off-key again. Little black musical note symbols also fall off as he plays] ;s1e33_49 Squidward; [grabs the paper but SpongeBob holds onto it] Give me my paper back! Now let go of it. I said let go of it! [SpongeBob still holding on to it] Let go, let go, let go, let go, let go, let go, let go... [jumps up and down] ;s1e33_50 SpongeBob; I can't! ;s1e33_51 Squidward; What do you mean you can't? [SpongeBob moves Squidward's hand off the piece of paper] ;s1e33_52 SpongeBob; I can't! You made me promise no matter how much you begged, and pleaded, and cried not to give the paper back to you ever. ;s1e33_53 Squidward; I never said anything like that! ;s1e33_54 SpongeBob; Sure you did, Squidward, look. [folds the paper a few times to make it look like a flip-book to what Squidward said earlier in the day] ;s1e33_55 Squidward; [in the flip-book] Take it, SpongeBob. Take it, please. And promise me, no matter how much I may beg and plead and cry, don't give that paper back to me… ever! ;s1e33_56 SpongeBob; Wanna see it again? ;s1e33_57 Squidward; No, I don't wanna see it again! Just give me that paper. ;s1e33_58 SpongeBob; Sorry, Squidward, I am sworn to a promise. [walks off] Maybe I should get going. ;s1e33_59 Squidward; Wait, wait, maybe we can trade for something. [looks around for something to trade] Yeah-yeah, something, something... [reaches in his pocket and takes out something] A-ha, wait up, SpongeBob! Wait! Hold on there, chum. [chuckles] I'm going to make you an offer. [SpongeBob looks to see what he has, which is revealed to be a rubberband and tiny bits of pocket lint] ;s1e33_60 SpongeBob; Wow, pocket lint! You drive a hard bargain, Squidward. Paper for lint, hmmm... ;s1e33_61 Squidward; Not the lint, the rubber band! ;s1e33_62 Squidward; Oh, dare, dare! ;s1e33_63 Squidward; Listen, you! [puts his nose against SpongeBob's nose] You are not going anywhere until we strike a deal. [Later, Squidward is bringing a TV over to SpongeBob's side in a wheelbarrow] Gotta get that paper. [walks back to get more stuff] ;s1e33_64 Squidward; Trade... [walks back] ;s1e33_65 SpongeBob; Hey, listen... [Squidward brings his house over] ;s1e33_66 SpongeBob; Oh, Squidward, is this still part of the test? Because it's...(cries) it's really getting harder and harder to keep my promise. ;s1e33_67 Squidward; (sadly) Okay, the shirt! [takes his shirt off] Take it! Take my shirt! ;s1e33_68 SpongeBob; Squidward's shirt. I've always loved that shirt. Okay, okay, I'll trade! [puts the shirt on] I can break a promise for this. Squidward, do you want your other stuff, ‘cause this is all I'll need? ;s1e33_69 Squidward; You can have all that junk, 'cause now I've got this! I've got the paper, and you've got my useless garbage. [puts the paper on his butt and waves it at SpongeBob] I got it! [laughs] And you can't have it. [runs around SpongeBob] I got it, you're a sucker. You're a sucker, sucker! [laughs, and runs back over to where his house used to be] At last, what should we try first, Mr. Paper? Impressions! A guy with a piece of paper on his nose. [puts the paper on his nose] Look at me! I'm a guy with a piece of paper... on his... nose. Hm... A-ha! Wait, wait, wait, wait... [puts the paper in his mouth and sticks his tongue out, revealing a wadded up piece of paper that is wet] Ta-dah! ;s1e33_70 Children;Boo!;s1e33_71 Squidward; [takes the piece of paper off his tongue and dries off it.] Okay, okay, uh... helicopter! [puts the piece of paper on his fingers] Gentlemen, start your engines. I'm flying! Oh yeah, I'm flying! I'm flying! That's right, that's right, here we go now. [bends up and down, trying to fly] I'm flying, flying, flying, flying, flying, flying, flying, flying... [sighs in exhaustion] ...flying. [SpongeBob is looking at himself in the mirror with Squidward's shirt on him while Gary is playing his clarinet] Wait, more impressions. A guy throwing a piece of paper on the ground! [throws it on the ground] A guy stomping on the piece of paper [stomps on the paper, then picks it up] I'm a guy who traded everything he owns for a... ;s1e33_72 Patrick; [walks up to Squidward chewing gum] A worthless piece of paper. [grabs the paper] Hey, thanks, it's just what I needed, Squidward. [blows a gum bubble then puts the gum on the piece of paper and throws it behind him in the garbage can. Then he walks away, towards SpongeBob's house] Nice shirt, SpongeBob. [laughs] ;s1e33_73 Squidward; [wind whistling] Does anybody have any sunscreen? ;s1e33_74 Mr. Krabs ; [looks around the Krusty Krab with a telescope] Where could they be? They should've been here hours ago! Arrgh! Not a customer in sight. If I don't make any money today, I'll surely break out in a rash! ;s1e34_1 SpongeBob; Yippee! I'm rich! Look, Patrick, eight gold doubloons! ;s1e34_2 Mr. Krabs ; Wait, I saw it first! Hyah! [jumps onto the table and sweats] Mine, mine! Huh?! ;s1e34_3 SpongeBob; Boy, Mr. Krabs, you sure are sweaty. ;s1e34_4 Mr. Krabs ; What's this? Where are the doubloons? ;s1e34_5 SpongeBob;" [laughs] There are no real doubloons, Mr. Krabs! It's a game: ""The Flying Dutchman's Treasure Hunt."" ";s1e34_6 Patrick; Based on a real treasure map. ;s1e34_7 SpongeBob; Take a break and play around with us. ;s1e34_8 Mr. Krabs ; Have you finished cleaning the tables? ;s1e34_9 SpongeBob; I cleaned the tables, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e34_10 Mr. Krabs ; Aye, but did you scrape all the gum off the underside? ;s1e34_11 Mr. Krabs ; Ha ha ha. All right, lads. Looks like you've shanghaied me. ;s1e34_12 Patrick; My turn. [rolls the dice] 5. [makes a raspberry noise while moving piece, then reads a card] One of your shipmates has been a bad pirate! Send him to the brig! Hmmm. [SpongeBob turns his eyes toward Mr. Krabs] It's off to jail for you, Mr. Krabs. ;s1e34_13 Mr. Krabs ; Patrick, you're fired! ;s1e34_14 Patrick; But I don't even work here! ;s1e34_15 Patrick; Boy, would I?! ;s1e34_16 Mr. Krabs ; [takes the hat off Patrick's head] You're fired! ;s1e34_17 SpongeBob; My turn. [rolls the dice] 1, 2, 3, 4. [picks up the card and reads it] Look for the Deacon's Goose thru the fork in the old tree and head that way. [looks through the hole in the tree] Well, I see Mr. Krabs' zipper is undone. ;s1e34_18 Mr. Krabs ; [gasps] Shiver me timbers! ;s1e34_19 SpongeBob; [laughs] Just kidding, Mr. Krabs. I'm almost to the treasure. Your turn again, Mr. Krabs. ;s1e34_20 Mr. Krabs ; [rolls the dice] Ooh, fish eyes. 1, 2. ;s1e34_21 SpongeBob;" [picks up card and reads it] You are a real pirate. Go straight to the ""X"" that marks the spot. You get to dig for treasure, Mr. Krabs! ";s1e34_22 Mr. Krabs ; Treasure? [digs with a small toy shovel and a mini plastic treasure chest appears] There it is! It's the Flying Dutchman's Treasure! Gold, gold, gold! Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine! [starts sweating profusely] ;s1e34_23 SpongeBob; Hey, Mr. Krabs is getting all sweaty again. ;s1e34_24 Fred; [walks into the Krusty Krab] Rev up those fryers, 'cause I am sure hungry for one-- [Mr. Krabs picks him up, holds him over his head, and heads for the door] Help! Help! [Mr. Krabs throws him out the door] My leg! ;s1e34_25 Mr. Krabs ; Can't you see we're closed?! [rushes back to the game table] Ready for another round? This is my kind of game! ;s1e34_26 SpongeBob; [very tired] I think we ought to call it a night, Mr. Krabs. I really got to get some sleep. ;s1e34_27 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, you can't walk out on me now. ;s1e34_28 SpongeBob; I'm sorry, Mr. Krabs. [yawns, then slings Patrick over his shoulder and carries him out] See you tomorrow. [walks inside his house after bringing Patrick home. Rattling noises heard] Huh? Who's there? [turns a light on] ;s1e34_29 SpongeBob; [pushes Mr. Krabs outside] Mr. Krabs, it's late. Go to bed! Good night, Mr. Krabs. [closes the door, but Mr. Krabs is inside the house once again] ;s1e34_30 Mr. Krabs ; Wind is perfect, the tide is right. Let's hunt for treasure. ;s1e34_31 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs, you gotta... [opens the door, and Mr. Krabs is now outside] ;s1e34_32 Mr. Krabs ; Tread softly, lad. If the Dutchman hears you, we'll never get his treasure. ;s1e34_33 SpongeBob; But, Mr. Krabs... ;s1e34_34 Mr. Krabs ; I'll roll for you, boy. ;s1e34_35 SpongeBob; But, Mr... ;s1e34_36 Mr. Krabs ; [rolls the dice] 8 paces, north, that's a good start, lad. ;s1e34_37 SpongeBob; [yelling in frustration] Mr. Krabs, I want to go to bed! [pauses] Mr. Krabs, I'm sorry, but it's just a game, ya know? ;s1e34_38 Mr. Krabs ; A game. That's... right. Of course it is, my mistake. [picks up the game board and folds it in half] I guess I got a little carried away, eh? Though it is treasure we're dealing with here. Sorry, for disturbing ya, lad. [walks away while SpongeBob shuts the door. Morning arrives, and then the rooster crows everyone up.] Avast! Pineapple, ho. Heave two, and prepare to be boarded. ;s1e34_39 SpongeBob; Aw, go home already. [gets out of bed and looks out the window] I'm done playing that game, Mr. Krabs. ;s1e34_40 Mr. Krabs ; That’s Captain Krabs to you, and this is no game. We're gonna be pirates. ;s1e34_41 SpongeBob; [excited] Pirates? ;s1e34_42 Mr. Krabs ; Aye! How'd you like to go on a real treasure hunt, with a real treasure map? ;s1e34_43 Mr. Krabs ; Ay, ay, ay. Belay that skipping. Pirates don't skip. [throws them a bag of pirate stuff] Put on this pirate garb, so I won't be embarrassed to be seen with ya. Arrgh. ;s1e34_44 SpongeBob; Oh, Patrick. Look! Peg legs and eye patches. ;s1e34_45 Mr. Krabs ; Now, don't you feel more like pirates? ;s1e34_46 SpongeBob; [walks towards the plank using two peg legs] Look, I'm Peggy the Pirate! [falls on the plank] ;s1e34_47 Patrick; [walks towards the plank with two separate eye patches covering his eyes] I'm Blindbeard the Pirate. [falls on SpongeBob] Ow. ;s1e34_48 Mr. Krabs ; Arrgh! [fade to ship sailing across in midair] Keep a sharp lookout, SpongeBob. According to the map, we're close to the first landmark. ;s1e34_49 SpongeBob; Really? Can we see the map? ;s1e34_50 Mr. Krabs ; Uh... no! Only the captain can lay eyes on the map. ;s1e34_51 SpongeBob; Okie dokie, then. ;s1e34_52 Mr. Krabs ;" Arrgh, a pirate doesn't say, ""okie dokie, then."" A pirate says, ""arrgh!"" ";s1e34_53 SpongeBob; Okie... oops. [laughs while a jellyfish flies by him] I mean... [standing up] arrgh! Captain Krabs. [his eyes widen and sees a rock nearby] Captain, we're about to hit... uhh... I mean... arrgh, Capt., arrgh, we're, arrgh, about, arrgh, to hit, arrgh... ;s1e34_54 Mr. Krabs ; Out with it man, arrgh! ;s1e34_55 Patrick; I, arrgh, think, arrgh, he's trying, arrgh, to say...! [crash] land... ;s1e34_56 Mr. Krabs ; Arrgh! From now on, only the captain says, arrgh! Status report, Mr. SquarePants? ;s1e34_57 SpongeBob; The whole ship is underwater captain. ;s1e34_58 Mr. Krabs ; Arrgh, we're marooned then. Our treasure hunt will have to continue on foot. This is it, boys, from the seaweed with 2 leaves on it. 10,000 paces east. ;s1e34_59 SpongeBob; But, Mr. Krabs, that seaweed has... [Mr. Krabs pulls a leaf off] Which way, cap'n? ;s1e34_60 Mr. Krabs ; Ensign Patrick, which way is east? ;s1e34_61 Mr. Krabs ;" 9,997... 9,998... 9,999... 10,000! Where's the ""X""? Supposed to be right here! 10,000 paces east. ";s1e34_62 Mr. Krabs ; Weast? What kind of compass you reading, lad? ;s1e34_63 Mr. Krabs ; That's west, Patrick. You're fired again. [cuts to the crew walking again] 9,551... 9,552... ;s1e34_64 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs, we're tired. ;s1e34_65 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, so this is my crew. You get a little tired, and a wee bit hungry, and you want to shove off for home. Arrgh! That sickens me. A pirate is not judged by the notches in his cutlass, or by the size of his booty. A pirate is judged by the loyalty of his crew. And without a loyal crew... [one of SpongeBob's eyes fill up with tears] what am I captain of? Just... a bunch of sand! [cries] ;s1e34_66 Patrick; Don't cry, Captain Krabs. ;s1e34_67 SpongeBob; [sniffles and crying] Yeah, we'll be your loyal crew. [both cry] ;s1e34_68 Mr. Krabs ; You'll stay with me then? ;s1e34_69 SpongeBob; We'll be the most loyal pirate crew ever! ;s1e34_70 Mr. Krabs ; I knew I could count on you boys. One for all! ;s1e34_71 Patrick; And all for one! [laying on ground at night outside tent] ;s1e34_72 SpongeBob; I'm so loyal, I don't even mind sleeping on the cold, hard ground while Captain Krabs sleeps in his warm, dry tent. ;s1e34_73 Patrick; I'm so loyal, I haven't bathed in weeks. ;s1e34_74 SpongeBob; But we've only been gone a few hours. ;s1e34_75 Patrick; I know. [chuckles. SpongeBob moves away] ;s1e34_76 SpongeBob; I'm so loyal, I don't wanna sleep till we find the treasure. Let's go see if the captain will go now! ;s1e34_77 Patrick; [entering the tent] Captain Krabs? ;s1e34_78 SpongeBob; He's not here. ;s1e34_79 Patrick; Look! The treasure map. ;s1e34_80 SpongeBob; Only the captain can look at the map, Patrick. ;s1e34_81 Patrick; [walks toward the map] Yeah... ;s1e34_82 SpongeBob; Patrick, what are you doing? ;s1e34_83 Patrick;Nothing.;s1e34_84 SpongeBob; Patrick, you're not supposed to look at the map. [Patrick touches the map] ;s1e34_85 Patrick; I'm not looking, I'm touching. There's no rule against that, is there? ;s1e34_86 SpongeBob; No, guess there isn't. [both poking the map, until it opens] Oops! Patrick, it opened by itself. [Both laugh. Their eyes enlarge and search the map] ;s1e34_87 Patrick; The map, the map, gotta see it, gotta look at it. [Their eyes freeze for a second and then pop back in their heads.] ;s1e34_88 Patrick;SpongeBob?;s1e34_89 SpongeBob;Yeah?;s1e34_90 Patrick; Did you notice something familiar about this map? ;s1e34_91 SpongeBob; You mean, like that it's our game board taped to a piece of paper? ;s1e34_92 Mr. Krabs ; [appearing right behind them and angry] Do you think this is a problem? ;s1e34_93 SpongeBob; [scream] Mr. Krabs! ;s1e34_94 Mr. Krabs ; Sneaking peeks at me treasure map? ;s1e34_95 Patrick; We're sorry. ;s1e34_96 Mr. Krabs ; That's mutiny on my ship. So you think ol' Captain Krabs has gone crazy, do ye? ;s1e34_97 SpongeBob; Not at all, Captain Krabs. We don't think that at all! ;s1e34_98 Patrick; I think that. ;s1e34_99 Mr. Krabs ; I'm gonna throw you overboard for saying that! ;s1e34_100 {system};" [SpongeBob and Patrick both begged in mercy and then the ""X"" symbol appeared underneath them.] ";s1e34_101 SpongeBob;" [gasps] Look! It's the ""X."" ";s1e34_102 Mr. Krabs ;" [eyes go into ""X"" like symbol] ""X"" marks the spot! ";s1e34_103 SpongeBob; Wow! That game really is based on a real treasure map. ;s1e34_104 Mr. Krabs ; Well, what are you waiting for, lads? [SpongeBob and Patrick both start digging.] Dig! Dig! [minutes later] Dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig. ;s1e34_105 SpongeBob; We got it, Captain Krabs. ;s1e34_106 Mr. Krabs ; Ha, ha. Hand it up to me, lads. Heave! [brings the treasure up] We finally found it. [opens up the treasure chest] ;s1e34_107 Chorus; The Dutchman's Treasure! ;s1e34_108 All;Wow!;s1e34_109 SpongeBob; What are you going to do with your share, Patrick? ;s1e34_110 Patrick; I don't know. How are you going to spend your share, SpongeBob? ;s1e34_111 Mr. Krabs ; What shares? You're not getting any of my treasure! ;s1e34_112 SpongeBob; We found it together. So we deserve a share! ;s1e34_113 Mr. Krabs ; Well, I'm the captain. And I say it's mine! ;s1e34_114 SpongeBob; What about loyalty? ;s1e34_115 Mr. Krabs ; All for one. ;s1e34_116 SpongeBob; And one for all. ;s1e34_117 Mr. Krabs ; All for one. ;s1e34_118 Mr. Krabs ; All for one. ;s1e34_119 SpongeBob; And one for all. ;s1e34_120 FlyingDutchman; [sleeping] I'm the Flying Dutchman. ;s1e34_121 Mr. Krabs ; All for one. ;s1e34_122 SpongeBob; And one for all. ;s1e34_123 FlyingDutchman; [sleeping] I'm the Flying Dutchman. [wakes up] Who dares wake the Flying Dutchman? Keep it down will ya? I'm trying to get some sleep. [noticing them fighting over the treasure chest] Huh? ;s1e34_124 Mr. Krabs ; All for one. ;s1e34_125 Patrick; One for all. [lightning strikes] ;s1e34_126 FlyingDutchman; Who dug up the Dutchman's treasure? ;s1e34_127 Mr. Krabs ; [shoves the chest toward SpongeBob and Patrick] They did! ;s1e34_128 FlyingDutchman; Arrgh! [picks up the treasure chest] So you two scallywags dug up me treasure? ;s1e34_129 SpongeBob; [hugging each other in fear] Uh-huh! ;s1e34_130 FlyingDutchman; Well, you saved me a lot of diggin' you did. So here's a reward for the two of ya's. ;s1e34_131 {system}; [The Flying Dutchman giving them couple of gold doubloons] ;s1e34_132 SpongeBob;Wow!;s1e34_133 Chorus; Two gold doubloons! ;s1e34_134 {system}; [SpongeBob and Patrick take the doubloons and the Flying Dutchman puts away his treasure chest in his pocket.] ;s1e34_135 Mr. Krabs ; Wait! I'm captain of this crew! Where's my reward? ;s1e34_136 FlyingDutchman; Hmmm, I guess you're right. A little something for your trouble. [flicks something to Mr. Krabs] ;s1e34_137 Mr. Krabs ; Gold, gold, gold, gold, gold! [a tiny plastic treasure chest] Huh? Why, it's just a little plastic treasure chest! ;s1e34_138 Chorus;Plastic!;s1e34_139 FlyingDutchman; Aye, but it's based on a real treasure chest. [laughs] ;s1e34_140 Patrick; Gee, Mr. Krabs, you're looking all sweaty again. ;s1e34_141 {system}; [Flying Dutchman turns into green smoke and vanishes.] ;s1e34_142 {system}; [At Glove World! Where SpongeBob and Patrick are standing outside the amusement park.] ;s1e35_1 SpongeBob; [Patrick is licking a glove-shaped lollipop] Another funtastic day at Glove World! [the bus stops at the bus stop and both of them get in, but SpongeBob struggles for a bit with his balloon] ;s1e35_2 Incidental 41 ; (as a bus driver) Ahem. [points to a coin deposit] ;s1e35_3 SpongeBob; Let me get my wallet. [turns around and the balloon hits Incidental 41's] Wait, let me check this pocket. [turns around and the balloon hits him again] No... [turns around and the balloon hits Incidental 41 again] Patrick? Do you have any change? ;s1e35_4 Patrick; How much do you need? ;s1e35_5 SpongeBob; How much is it? ;s1e35_6 Incidental 41 ; Fifty cents. ;s1e35_7 SpongeBob; [turns around and the balloon smacks Incidental 41 in the back of his head] Fifty cents. ;s1e35_8 SpongeBob; [turns around and the balloon smacks Incidental 41 again] Let me check my other poc- ;s1e35_9 Incidental 41 ; [annoyed] Forget it! ;s1e35_10 SpongeBob; [turns around and balloon smacks Incidental 41 again] What did you say? ;s1e35_11 SpongeBob; Thanks, mister. ;s1e35_12 Incidental 41 ; Yeah, whatev- [SpongeBob turns around and balloon smacks him in the back of the head, causing him to glare at SpongeBob with an annoyed grin] ;s1e35_13 Patrick; Show me what you got at Glove World! ;s1e35_14 SpongeBob; Okay! Here's my glove light. [turns on a light] ;s1e35_15 SpongeBob; [puts the light inside his head] I see you! [both laugh] ;s1e35_16 Patrick; I got gloves for my glove action-figure! [puts a tiny glove on the big glove's thumb] ;s1e35_17 SpongeBob;" Cool! [Patrick looks out the window and notices a sign that says ""You Are Now Leaving Bikini Bottom"" as they drive past it] ";s1e35_18 Patrick; Hey, SpongeBob? ;s1e35_19 SpongeBob; [a tiny glove is on his nose] Yeah, Patrick? ;s1e35_20 Patrick; Where's 'Leaving Bikini Bottom'? ;s1e35_21 SpongeBob; Where did you see that? ;s1e35_22 Patrick; We just passed the sign. 'You are now in Leaving Bikini Bottom'. ;s1e35_23 SpongeBob; [gasps] What?! [looks out the window] ;s1e35_24 Patrick;" What's wrong, SpongeBob? [driving past a sign that says ""Bikini Bottom City Limits""] ";s1e35_25 SpongeBob; Patrick, I think we're on the wrong buuuuuuuuuu.... [the bus drives down at a 90-degree angle road. SpongeBob and Patrick fly back and his the back of the bus] ...bus! [walks slowly up front. His face gets all distorted as he is moving closer. His pants rip off and fly at Patrick, but Patrick ducks in time. Then SpongeBob's underwear hits Patrick in the face. The bus comes to an immediate stop and both fly forward and hit the windshield. Then the balloon smacks Incidental 41 onto the windshield and all of them peel off together. SpongeBob and Patrick are kicked out of the bus] But, sir, we need to get back to Bikini Bottom. ;s1e35_26 SpongeBob; [reads a sign] Rock Bottom. [scroll over to a bus station] It sure is weird around here. Kinda different, even the soil looks different. [picks up some green soil] ;s1e35_27 Soil; Would you... [raspberry] mind... [raspberry] putting me down? [SpongeBob shakes him off as he gasps] ;s1e35_28 Patrick; I still can't read the sign! I wanna go home! ;s1e35_29 SpongeBob; Uhh, uhh, okay. You wait for the bus. Call me when it comes. I'm gonna get a bus schedule. [walks off] Boy, this place sure is creepy. [the bus drives by with Patrick's head sticking out the window] ;s1e35_30 Patrick; Hey, SpongeBob, the bus is here! [SpongeBob runs after the bus] SpongeBob...! [the bus drives up the 90-degree angle road and SpongeBob tries to run up the road, but falls down. Tries a couple more times but is unsuccessful] ;s1e35_31 SpongeBob; I guess Grandpa SquarePants was right. Don't run for a bus. [puts on Grandpa SquarePants' disguise] Especially one that's going up at a 90-degree angle. [takes off his disguise] I better go wait for the next one. [later, SpongeBob is standing by the bus stop sign with his glove balloon in his right hand] C'mon, bus! I've got to get home and feed Gary! [notices his shoe is untied and lets go of the balloon] Uh-oh, shoe's untied. [puts his foot on the bus sign] Over, under, and over, and loop-dee-loop, and over... [the bus drives up and then drives off] and through the barrel. [later, the wind is blowing SpongeBob's glove hat on his side so he puts it back. Wind blows the balloon away] My balloon! [chases after the balloon, jumping for it when he gets the chance. A bus drives up and then drives off] Wait! Hold on! Stop that bus! Aww, not again! [throws his hat down. Notices Incidental 211] Umm, excuse me, sir. Can you help me? [Incidental 211 gives raspberry] Uhh, uhh, yeah, I... [Incidental 211 runs after the balloon] No, no! Not the balloon! I need to know when the next bus comes... [the bus drives up and then drives off. SpongeBob runs after it, but decides to walk back to the bus stop sign] Well, there goes another one. I gotta be more diligent. I am not leaving this spot no matter what! [SpongeBob's stomach growls] I'm gettin' hungry. Glove candy dispenser! Good thing I went to Glove World!. [squeezes out 6 tiny glove candies onto his tongue, then spits them out] Eww, glove flavored! Hey, what's that? [a Kandy Machine is shown across the road] A candy machine. [rubs his tummy] Mmm, kelp nougat crunch. Mmm... [checks each side of the road to see if a bus is coming] I'm not leaving this spot no matter what! [his stomach growls] I'll only be gone a second. [runs over to the machine. While getting out a quarter, a bus drives up. Runs back across to bus] Hey! [the bus drives off] Ooh! [stomach growls. Takes a few steps across the road and turns around to check for the bus. Takes a few more steps and checks again. Gets to the candy machine and takes out the quarter. Before inserting it, he checks for a bus. There's no bus so he puts in the quarter but a bus DOES come and drives off.] Wait! [Now he checks to his left down the road and decides to sprint across and get some candy. Pushes some buttons and checks for the bus. The candy is slowly coming down] Come on, come on! [candy drops to the bottom. SpongeBob grabs for it, but a bus drives up and then drives off. SpongeBob gets angry. He reaches for the candy but a bus comes up. Every time he reaches for the candy, the bus drives forward but when he pulls his arm away, the bus drives backwards. So he decides to leave the candy and run after the bus, but the bus drives off before he can get there. Incidental 222 comes up and takes the candy] Hey! That was mine! [walks over to the candy machine. 3 buses drives up and drive off while he's over there so he decides to run back. No more buses come, so he shakes the bus sign angrily] Barnacles! Alright, that's it! No more mister nice guy! [later, SpongeBob is at the candy machine staring at it and a bus drives up. Another SpongeBob tip-toes up, but the SpongeBob at the candy machine falls over revealing it to be made of wood. The bus drives off] Tartar sauce! [SpongeBob is now a bench. A bus drives up, but drives off after it notices the SpongeBob bench] Fish paste! [walking into the bus station] I'm getting to the bottom of this, right now! I want a bus to Bikini Bottom! I am first in line and no one is gonna tell me otherwise! [sees Incidental 220 standing behind him already in line] Okay, second! I am second in line! [sees Incidental 206 already in line] Okay, third is good! [Incidental 205 is already in line] Fourth, not bad. [Cut to SpongeBob at the end of the line behind Incidental 221] Okay, 329. I am 329th in line and nobody forget it! [Incidental 221 spits out a giant egg on SpongeBob's head with the number 329 on it] ;s1e35_32 WindowAttendant; Next. [raspberry] ;s1e35_33 SpongeBob; Well, at least the line is moving. [everyone steps forward. Egg hatches 3 baby fish that jump in front of SpongeBob, thus making him remain 329th in line. SpongeBob gets extremely furious. He lets out an angry growl.] Tartar sauce! [SpongeBob hides inside his clothes and goes ballistic. Then comes out and everyone staring at him turns around] ;s1e35_34 WindowAttendant; [time is going fast. raspberry] Next. [raspberry] Next. [raspberry. SpongeBob is sleeping] Next. [raspberry] Next! ;s1e35_35 SpongeBob; [wakes up] Huh? ;s1e35_36 WindowAttendant; What? [raspberry] ;s1e35_37 SpongeBob; The bus schedule. The next bus. ;s1e35_38 WindowAttendant; (reveals himself as Incidental 222) I can't... [raspberry] understand... [raspberry] your accent. [raspberry] ;s1e35_39 SpongeBob; The next bus... [raspberry] to Bikini... [raspberry] Bottom. [long raspberry] ;s1e35_40 Incidental 222 ; Ohh. [raspberry] Why didn't you say so? [raspberry] Next bus leaves in... [raspberry] 5 seconds. [the bus leaves] Ohh, tough luck, kid. [raspberry] That's the last one til' morning. [raspberry] ;s1e35_41 SpongeBob; Oh, [raspberry] no... [raspberry] you don't! [raspberry] ;s1e35_42 SpongeBob; Hold it, I'm not through here! [raspberry] Do you hear me? [raspberry] I demand you come back and give me a bus to Bikini Bottom right now! Until then, I am not leaving this spot! [gives three raspberries. Lights turn off. SpongeBob laughs nervously] Okay, like I said, I'll be right here when you get back. At this spot. In the dark. By myself. With no one around. Except my glove light! [turns on the light] Ah, that's better. ;s1e35_43 {system}; [The glove light buzzes with a spark fuse and it stops working short pause.] ;s1e35_44 SpongeBob; This isn't your average everyday darkness. This is... advanced darkness. Hey! [closes his eyes] If I close my eyes, it doesn't seem so dark. ;s1e35_45 {system}; [A raspberry is heard in the distance he opens his eyes] ;s1e35_46 SpongeBob; Who's there?! [walks down the road] Well, I guess that spot will be there tomorrow. I better just keep walking. [hears another raspberry] Running. Better start running. Running. Running. [hears another raspberry] Sprinting! Yes! I just gotta keep sprinting! [runs into the 90-degree angle road. Sits down with scallops flying around his head] Sitting, sitting. Bleeding. [hears noise] Hey, who's there? [hears another raspberry] Okay, that's enough! [hears another raspberry] Don't come closer! [hears another raspberry] I'm warning you! [hears another raspberry] I'm a sponge! [a red light shines around SpongeBob. It's Incidental 211 from earlier] Oh, it's only you. [Incidental 211 ties the white balloon to SpongeBob's wrist] Well, that solves my balloon problem, but I have a bigger problem. [Incidental 211 begins blowing the balloon bigger] I'm kinda stuck here. I need to catch a bus to get home. You don't understand a word I'm saying, do you? Balloon... [raspberry] has... [raspberry] enough... [raspberry] air... [raspberry] thanks. [gives a few more raspberries as he is floating up] Hey, I get it, balloon travel! Thank... [raspberry] you! [raspberry] ;s1e35_47 Incidental 211 ; You're welcome! ;s1e35_48 SpongeBob; [with the balloon still tied to his wrist and turned yellow and it floats all the way back home] Ah, home at last. [the balloon pops] ;s1e35_49 Patrick; [riding another bus to Rock Bottom] Don't worry, SpongeBob, I'm coming back for ya! ;s1e35_50 SpongeBob; Good morning, Bikini Bottom! Ah, what a beautiful day. [SpongeBob's hand appears from a sand castle pineapple with his face drawn on his hand] I wonder if Patrick's at home. ;s1e36_1 Patrick; Hiya, SpongeBob! [Patrick's hand comes over from a sand castle rock with his face drawn on his hand] Whatcha doin'? ;s1e36_2 SpongeBob; Goin' over to Sandy's place. [both hands walk off together and arrive at a sand-made treedome] Hey, what's this? This doesn't look like Sandy's place. ;s1e36_3 Sandy; Don't lose your barnacles, boys. Hi-yah! [Chops sand castle peak down making a sand image of Texas] There it is. ;s1e36_4 SpongeBob; What is it? ;s1e36_5 Sandy; Can't you see? It's Texas. ;s1e36_6 SpongeBob; Texas? What's a Texas? [a wave covers sand and ruins Sandy's Texas display] ;s1e36_7 Sandy; Ohh, it's nothing but a memory now. ;s1e36_8 Sandy; You know, all of a sudden, I don't feel like sand castles, SpongeBob. I'll see y'all later. [walks off] ;s1e36_9 SpongeBob; Sandy? Hi-yah! ;s1e36_10 Sandy; Aww, SpongeBob, I'm not feeling up to karate now. ;s1e36_11 SpongeBob; Uhh, Sandy? [surfs in the air] Surf's up, Sandy! ;s1e36_12 Sandy; No, thanks. [enters Jellyfish Fields. Jellyfish are heard buzzing] ;s1e36_13 SpongeBob; [Runs after a jellyfish with a net] Boy, there's nothing like going jellyfishing! [Patrick runs after one while laughing, then falls on his face. He gets up and runs again] ;s1e36_14 SpongeBob; Look, Sandy, we caught one! ;s1e36_15 SpongeBob; [laughs] We don't eat 'em! We let 'em go! ;s1e36_16 Patrick; Fly away, little critter! ;s1e36_17 SpongeBob; Go on, go back to where you belong. [the jellyfish flies away as Sandy watches tearfully] Run along, back to your family and friends. I know they miss you as much as you miss them. Hurry, before they forget you and leave you behind. Remember: there's no place like home! [Sandy begins to cry, filling her helmet with tears. She takes out a flusher handle and attaches it to her helmet. She pulls it down and all her tears drain out. Sandy gasps for air and pants.] ;s1e36_18 SpongeBob; Sandy, what the heck are you crying about? ;s1e36_19 Sandy; I ain't crying! My helmet just sprung a leak! ;s1e36_20 SpongeBob; [suspicious] Sandy... ;s1e36_21 Sandy; [confessing] Oh, I guess I'm just feeling a little homesick. ;s1e36_22 SpongeBob; Homesick, huh? [SpongeBob thinks, and later, Sandy is blindfolded as SpongeBob and Patrick take her somewhere] Almost there. ;s1e36_23 Sandy; Dead-gum it, SpongeBob, what is it? ;s1e36_24 SpongeBob; Da-ta-dah! [the three are standing outside the Treedome] ;s1e36_25 Patrick; Welcome home, Sandy! ;s1e36_26 Sandy; Go away. [pulls a lever which brings down a metal covering on the treedome] ;s1e36_27 SpongeBob; I don't get it, Patrick! What's wrong with Sandy? ;s1e36_28 Patrick; Maybe it's just a squirrel thing. [a hole opens up in the top of the dome and Sandy comes out wearing a cowgirl hat and holding a guitar. Sandy tunes it] ;s1e36_29 SpongeBob; Hey, Patrick, listen to that. [Patrick has the notes going around him] ;s1e36_30 Patrick; Arrrgh! Get them off me! Get them off me! ;s1e36_31 SpongeBob; Patrick, listen. You hear that? It's Sandy. ;s1e36_32 Sandy; I wanna wake up in Texas. [live action scenery is shown] I miss those wide open skies. I miss my twenty acres, barbecues, and pecan pies, oh, why? When I'm so far from you Texas, all I can do is cry. [a live-action squirrel sheds a tear. SpongeBob and Patrick start sobbing. At the Krusty Krab, Mr. Krabs hears the song and SpongeBob and Patrick crying, too, and Mr. Krabs starts sobbing also and accidentally gets hit by the cash register.] ;s1e36_33 All; Please, make it stop! [Two customers are also sobbing : Incidental 42 dries his eyes with his Krabby Patty and gives it to the Incidental 23 who blows his nose on it] ;s1e36_34 Sandy; I wanna go hoooommme. [Junior Brown's voice] I wanna go home. [as she sings she goes back into the Treedome. SpongeBob and Patrick continue sobbing and then stop] ;s1e36_35 Patrick; Do you think she knows the Muffin Man song? ;s1e36_36 SpongeBob; Patrick, she sang that song from her heart. She really misses Texas. ;s1e36_37 Patrick; [mishears, and frantically covers himself] Where? ;s1e36_38 {system}; [Later, SpongeBob and Patrick have gotten everything ready at the Krusty Krab] ;s1e36_39 SpongeBob; Everything looks perfect. We're going to get Sandy now. ;s1e36_40 Mr. Krabs ; [from inside] Well, hurry up, lads! We can't squat like this forever! ;s1e36_41 {system}; [at Sandy's house where SpongeBob & : Patrick are playing leapfrog while going to her treedome] ;s1e36_42 Patrick; Krusty Krab! Krusty Krab! Sandy's surprise is at the Krusty Krab! ;s1e36_43 SpongeBob; Shh! Don't spoil the surprise! [SpongeBob knocks, Sandy opens her door] ;s1e36_44 Patrick; Hey, Sandy! ;s1e36_45 SpongeBob; You want to come with us to the Krusty Krab? ;s1e36_46 Sandy; [walks out with two suitcases] Hey, SpongeBob. Hey, Patrick. ;s1e36_47 SpongeBob; What are you doing with those bags? ;s1e36_48 Sandy; I'm going back home to Texas. ;s1e36_49 SpongeBob; What?! Now?! You can't! I mean we... ;s1e36_50 Sandy; It's time for this tumbleweed to tumble on home. ;s1e36_51 SpongeBob; Wait, Sandy! You can't! Uhh, we we're gonna...the...the...Krusty Krab...that is not the right direction! Wait, if you don't...if I can't...augh! Sandy! Wait a second! You don't wanna leave without having one last Krabby Patty down at the Krusty Krab! ;s1e36_52 Sandy; I'm tired of fish food, SpongeBob. ;s1e36_53 SpongeBob; But, Sandy, don't you want to say goodbye to all your friends down at the Krusty Krab? ;s1e36_54 Sandy; [gets on a bus] I just can't do that, SpongeBob. It'd be too sad. ;s1e36_55 SpongeBob; No, no! Wait! Sandy! [the bus drives off] I can't believe she's gone. ;s1e36_56 Patrick; Yeah. What's so great about dumb ol' Texas? [the bus suddenly speeds back : the doors open revealing Sandy with an angry look on her face] ;s1e36_57 Sandy; What did you say?! ;s1e36_58 Patrick; Texas is dumb? ;s1e36_59 Sandy; [the bus drives off again] Don't you dare take the name of Texas in vain! ;s1e36_60 SpongeBob; You mean we can't say anything bad about dumb ol' Texas? ;s1e36_61 Patrick; Oh, then...can we say people from Texas are dumb? ;s1e36_62 SpongeBob; [gets an idea] Oh, so we shouldn’t say anything bad about... [turns around : grabs his behind and shakes it and rolls eyes] Texas! ;s1e36_63 SpongeBob; Look, Patrick, I'm Texas! Duh, howdy, y'all! Howdy y'all! ;s1e36_64 Patrick; I'm Texas, too. Git a dog, little longie! Git a dog! ;s1e36_65 Patrick; Git a dog, little longie! Git a dog! ;s1e36_66 Sandy; Y'all best cut it out! ;s1e36_67 SpongeBob; [while Patrick does armpit farts] The stars at night are dull and dim, whenever they have to be over dumb ol' stupid Texas! [Sandy gets steaming mad. SpongeBob turns into the shape of Texas] Hey, Patrick, what am I now? ;s1e36_68 Patrick; Uhh, stupid? ;s1e36_69 SpongeBob; No, I'm Texas! ;s1e36_70 Patrick; What's the difference?! [SpongeBob and Patrick laugh] ;s1e36_71 Sandy; [drops suitcases] Y'all best apologize, or I'm going to be on you like ugly on an ape! ;s1e36_72 SpongeBob; You'll have to catch us first! [SpongeBob and Patrick run off] We did it. We got her. ;s1e36_73 Patrick; Krusty Krab, here we come! [turns head around to Sandy] Can we say that plants from Texas are dumb? Can we say that shoes from Texas are dumb? ;s1e36_74 SpongeBob; Okay, Patrick, that's enough. ;s1e36_75 Patrick; Why? You think that old slowpoke Texas is gonna... [...catch up, which she is. And fast. Patrick's eyes bug out and he screams] ;s1e36_76 SpongeBob; Run faster, Patrick! [both of them scream : they go around each side of a huge rock. Sandy crashes right through the rock, obliterating it, and walks while twirling a lasso. Her shoe engulfs the screen, Sandy lassoes Patrick and brings him into the background] ;s1e36_77 Patrick; [screams] SpongeBob! [Nuclear explosion is heard and a mushroom cloud appears. SpongeBob screams. SpongeBob stops in front of a leaf and shakes as Sandy karate chops the leaf and SpongeBob in half] ;s1e36_78 Sandy; Hi-yah! [SpongeBob jumps with his halves and he gets back together] Y'all going to take back what ya said! ;s1e36_79 SpongeBob; No! Almost there! [runs toward the Krusty Krab. Sandy's lasso turns into the shape of SpongeBob : SpongeBob screams. As he jumps for the Krusty Krab, Sandy throws her lasso. SpongeBob hangs onto the door as Sandy pulls him towards her] ;s1e36_80 Sandy; SpongeBob! You've been messing with the bull! Now here come the horns! ;s1e36_81 SpongeBob; No, Sandy! No! [the front of the Krusty Krab tears off as Sandy has pulled tight enough] ;s1e36_82 Everyone; Howdy, y'all! ;s1e36_83 Sandy; Wha-what's this? ;s1e36_84 SpongeBob; It's a party! ;s1e36_85 Patrick; [hops over to the Krusty Krab, hogtied and covered in bandages] For you! ;s1e36_86 Sandy; For me?! ;s1e36_87 SpongeBob; It's your own little slice of Texas! Check it out, Sandy! We got square dancing... [Flats is holding a square] ...giant Barbecues... [Squidward is holding a sharp, spiky Q] ;s1e36_88 Squidward; Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. ;s1e36_89 SpongeBob; ...homemade peas-in-a-can pie... [Pearl is holding a pie with a can of peas in it] ...and we got our very own 10 gallon hats! [SpongeBob and Patrick put ten gallon water jugs on their heads] So, what do ya think? Are you gonna stay? ;s1e36_90 {system}; [Sandy starts to laugh and tears of laughter spew out and fill her helmet. Everyone frowns as tears start to well up in SpongeBob and Patrick's eyes] ;s1e36_91 SpongeBob; Don't cry anymore, Sandy, I'll go get your bags. ;s1e36_92 Sandy; [takes out the flusher handle, attaches it to her helmet and flushes the water out again] I'm not crying, I'm laughing! I appreciate what y'all are trying to do, SpongeBob, but home isn't about barbecues or pecan pies, home is where you're surrounded by critters that care about ya. [Everyone gathers around Sandy] ;s1e36_93 Sandy; Huh? Duh. What am I doing? I was home all along, and it took me until now to realize it. ;s1e36_94 SpongeBob; Does that mean you'll stay? ;s1e36_95 Sandy; I'm staying! [Everyone cheers, except Squidward] ;s1e36_96 SpongeBob; That makes me feel all wiggly. ;s1e36_97 Patrick; Yeah, who needs dumb ol' Texas? [cheering stops : cut back to the Bikini Atoll] ;s1e36_98 Sandy; What did you just say?! ;s1e36_99 Patrick; Should I start running now? ;s1e36_100 {system}; [The episode opens at Goo Lagoon. A small bulldozer approaches the Goo Lagoon sign, tears it out of the ground, and throws it away. Just then, Plankton comes out of the bulldozer with his hard hat on, laughing evilly, and puts down a couple of construction barriers] ;s1e37_1 Plankton; [takes out a megaphone and turns on] Attention, beach-goers! You are trespassing! You have exactly 17 minutes to haul your carcasses off the future site of the [puts up a sign] 'Chum Bucket Mega Bucket.' [all that is heard is a loud squeaking noise that catches some of the beachgoers' attention] ;s1e37_2 Incidental 8 ;" Do you hear something? [Incidental 41 doesn't hear anything, and he shakes his head ""no."" Incidental 155 thinks the sound is coming from his megaphone, so he looks inside it, then turns it upside-down and shakes it.] ";s1e37_3 Plankton; [angrily] Okay, have it your way. I don't mind bulldozing over each and every one-- ;s1e37_4 Incidental 65 ; [grabs Plankton's bulldozer] Mommy, look! Somebody left this toy tractor here. ;s1e37_5 Incidental 14 ; Put that down, Billy, that has germs on it. [Plankton frowns as his antennae droops and have germs on tractor of car oil.] ;s1e37_6 Incidental 65 ; [drops the bulldozer] Aw, mom. ;s1e37_7 Plankton; [talks through megaphone] You'll see. [throws away the megaphone] You'll all see! The future site of the Chum Bucket Mega Bucket must be clear to these cretinous beachgoers. But it's becoming increasingly obvious. I can deny it no longer! [zoom out] I am small. I need someone big to clear the beach for me. I need... [giant foot almost steps on Plankton, but he dives out of the way] SpongeBob! ;s1e37_8 Plankton; Yes. He's the one. [laughs evilly. The sand on his head falls off] ;s1e37_9 SpongeBob; I'll have one... [Incidental 103 cuts in front of him] ;s1e37_10 Incidental 103 ; Two, please. [Lou gives him two ice creams] Thanks. [walks off] ;s1e37_11 Eel; Excuse me. [walks off licking the ice cream] ;s1e37_12 SpongeBob; One, please. ;s1e37_13 Incidental 39 ; Sorry, kid. We're all out. ;s1e37_14 SpongeBob; Aww, barnacles. [he hears crying coming from Plankton, who's sitting on a bench with two strawberry ice creams] Plankton, what are you doing here? And why are you crying? ;s1e37_15 SpongeBob; I'll eat one of those ice cream cones for ya. ;s1e37_16 Plankton; SpongeBob! Would you do that for me? ;s1e37_17 SpongeBob; Sure! [starts to lick the strawberry ice cream] ;s1e37_18 Plankton; SpongeBob? [SpongeBob is still licking the strawberry ice cream] SpongeBob? [SpongeBob eats the whole ice cream and is now licking what's left inside. Plankton uses his megaphone to get SpongeBob's attention] SpongeBob! ;s1e37_19 SpongeBob; [turns towards Plankton] Yeah? [spits out ice cream as he talks] ;s1e37_20 Plankton; Isn't it great to get the things you desire? Like that ice cream cone, for instance. [SpongeBob licks his fingers] You can have anything you want with a little training. [SpongeBob licks his fingers again] ;s1e37_21 SpongeBob;Training?;s1e37_22 Plankton; Yes. You just have to learn to be more assertive. And I can show you how. ;s1e37_23 SpongeBob; Assertive, huh? ;s1e37_24 Plankton; That's right. ;s1e37_25 SpongeBob; Anything I want. [licks his lips] Sounds great! [spits more ice cream at Plankton when talking] ;s1e37_26 Plankton; No, no, be assertive! [SpongeBob puts his fingers in Incidental 23's pockets] ;s1e37_27 SpongeBob; Beep Beep! [Plankton facepalms] ;s1e37_28 Plankton; Not insertive! [Incidental 23 checks his watch by the time, then walks away] SpongeBob, you missed your chance! You've got to be aggressive to get the things you want! You're too soft! ;s1e37_29 Plankton; Don't say it! [Plankton spots the eel that took SpongeBob's strawberry ice cream cone] There's the guy who took your ice cream. Don't you want it back? ;s1e37_30 SpongeBob; Ice cream! [Plankton gets up and runs behind the eel] ;s1e37_31 Plankton; Listen, you! My friend's got something to say! [The eel turns around] ;s1e37_32 Eel; What, who said that? [talks to SpongeBob] Was it you? ;s1e37_33 Plankton; Tell him off, SpongeBob. Assert yourself! ;s1e37_34 SpongeBob; That's my ice cream cone! ;s1e37_35 Plankton; Great! Now let him have it! ;s1e37_36 SpongeBob; [misunderstanding what Plankton means] You can have it. ;s1e37_37 SpongeBob; Hey, that guy was crying. ;s1e37_38 Plankton; Those were tears of joy! He was happy that you were assertive! ;s1e37_39 SpongeBob;Yeah!;s1e37_40 Plankton; You see how wonderful life can be, [threateningly] when you're maniacal? ;s1e37_41 SpongeBob; Uhh, I thought it was called assertive. ;s1e37_42 Plankton;Whatever.;s1e37_43 Scooter; Uhh, excuse me, my metal detector broke. Can I use yours? [SpongeBob hands the equipment to him] ;s1e37_44 SpongeBob;Sure!;s1e37_45 Plankton; SpongeBob, this is your next lesson. Be aggressive! Tell that guy to take a hike! ;s1e37_46 SpongeBob; [misunderstands] Do you want to take a hike with me? ;s1e37_47 Scooter;Yeah.;s1e37_48 Plankton; [angry] Now, look what you've done! Tell that guy to go fall in a ditch! ;s1e37_49 SpongeBob; [sees a ditch] Hey, go check in that ditch! [points to the ditch beside them. Scooter jumps down in the ditch and finds a treasure chest] ;s1e37_50 Scooter; Wow, buried treasure! Thanks! ;s1e37_51 SpongeBob; Did you see that, Plankton? That guy found some buried treasure! ;s1e37_52 Plankton; [frustrated] SpongeBob, you'll never get it right! Tell that guy you know karate and you'll tie him in a knot if you don't get your metal detector back! ;s1e37_53 SpongeBob; Hey! I'm gonna tie your...shoe if you don't give that back! ;s1e37_54 Scooter; But I'm wearing sandals! ;s1e37_55 SpongeBob; Okay, never mind! [Plankton jumps off of SpongeBob] It's alright, Plankton, he's wearing sandals. What's the matter? ;s1e37_56 Plankton; [putting things into a suitcase] Oh, nothing, SpongeBob. [puts on a black hat] I was just beginning to think that this was a waste of time. ;s1e37_57 SpongeBob; No it's not! ;s1e37_58 Plankton; Forget it! I guess you don't have what it takes to be a stand-up guy. ;s1e37_59 SpongeBob; But what about airline food? ;s1e37_60 Plankton;What?;s1e37_61 Plankton; [frustrated] SpongeBob, you'll never get what you want! You'll always let people step all over you! You're just like stairs! ;s1e37_62 Plankton; Okay, but this is your last chance! [points to people trying to get a tan] Look at all those beach hogs soaking up your sun rays. Do you have what it takes to get a tan? ;s1e37_63 Fred; My leg! [after everyone runs off, SpongeBob is laying on his back with a funnel acting as a sunlamp] ;s1e37_64 Plankton; Yes, my plan is beginning to work! They're leaving the beach! [SpongeBob now has a tan and looks brown] SpongeBob, that was wonderful! Is that an all-over tan? ;s1e37_65 Plankton; Look at that huge line at the hot dog stand. Assert yourself to the front! ;s1e37_66 SpongeBob; I'll do better than that! [he stretches his tongue to eat everybody's hotdogs at the snack bar] ;s1e37_67 Plankton; SpongeBob, that was genius! Look at all those kite fliers blocking your view! ;s1e37_68 SpongeBob;What?;s1e37_69 Plankton; Breaking your wind! [SpongeBob uses one of his teeth to boomerang it into cutting the strings off the kites. SpongeBob laughs maniacally, until a volley ball bumps into his heel. He picks it up] ;s1e37_70 Larry; Hey, SpongeBob, throw us the ball. [SpongeBob pops the volleyball and not throwing the volleyball and trumpets like an elephant. Everybody leaves the beach in the fall] ;s1e37_71 SpongeBob; Plankton, did you see that? I was a regular alpha-male! [sees Plankton missing] Plankton? [Plankton is driving a crane] Plankton, all my asserting is driving everybody away! ;s1e37_72 Plankton;Exactly.;s1e37_73 SpongeBob; You didn't tell me everyone would leave. ;s1e37_74 Plankton;" Oops. [he presses a button in his crane, and the ""Mega Bucket"" sign comes out from the ground] ";s1e37_75 SpongeBob; [gasps] Mega Bucket?! You used me... for land development! [voice cracks] That wasn't nice! ;s1e37_76 Plankton; Haven't you figured it out, SpongeBob? Nice guys finish last. Only aggressive people conquer the world! [laughs evilly] ;s1e37_77 SpongeBob; Well... [gets an idea] What about aggressively nice people? ;s1e37_78 Plankton; Huh? What are you doing? [SpongeBob brings out the hot dogs in the hot dog stand, he ate earlier and puts them back where they belong. Then he puts the kites back where they were] Wait, SpongeBob! Stop! [a girl is crying because she has sand on her ice cream. SpongeBob takes it and wipes the sand off with his eyelashes] Butterfly kisses. Can't take it. It's too cute! It's... it's disgusting! [Scooter is crying at his broken surfboard] ;s1e37_79 SpongeBob; What happened? [points to surfboard] ;s1e37_80 Scooter; I hit a reef with my new board, dude! ;s1e37_81 SpongeBob; No problem! [shapeshifts into a surfboard] ;s1e37_82 Scooter; Whoa! [grabs the surfboard] Killer! ;s1e37_83 Plankton; SpongeBob, stop! Before it's too late! Your kindness is bringing everybody back! [everyone comes back] Get back! Wait! [everyone, on their way back to the beach breaks through the construction barriers, trample and squish Plankton underfoot. Scooter is surfing with SpongeBob] ;s1e37_84 Scooter; Cowabunga! [Scooter and SpongeBob arrive back to shore] Thanks, dude! That was awesome! [just then, Plankton begins straining and weeping] ;s1e37_85 SpongeBob; Gee, Plankton, I'm sorry about the Chum Bucket. ;s1e37_86 Plankton; Forget about that. I just can't take so much kindness in one sitting! [bunches up into a ball] Need hatred. [crawls away] ;s1e37_87 SpongeBob; Volleyball, anyone? [everyone uses SpongeBob as the ball] Serve up! Aaa! Ouch! Aaa! Ouch! Aaa! Ouch! ;s1e37_88 {system}; [The episode begins with Gary snoring and meowing] ;s1e38_1 SpongeBob; Wake up, Gary. ;s1e38_2 Gary; [wakes up] Meow? ;s1e38_3 SpongeBob; We're moving today! ;s1e38_4 Gary; [quizzically] Meow? ;s1e38_5 SpongeBob; That's right! We're leaving home. We're going to become peasants! [puts on a hat and fake beard] ;s1e38_6 Gary;Meow.;s1e38_7 SpongeBob; [takes away Gary's bowl] No more food. [gives Gary a plate with clams on it] Sorry, Gary. Peasants only eat mashed-up clam shells. [SpongeBob puts salt in the shells, and Gary starts crying] April Fools! [takes off the outfit and puts Gary's food bowl back onto the floor] There ya go, pal! ;s1e38_8 SpongeBob; [goes into the kitchen] Whew, I'm thirsty! [takes a big glass of lemonade out of the fridge] [deep male voice] This is an extreme thirst! [sets the lemonade down on the floor] ;s1e38_9 {system}; [Bubble transition to him putting all the lemonade into a lot of small glasses with umbrellas] ;s1e38_10 SpongeBob; [normal voice] Whew, I'm exhausted. I sure can't wait to drink all these drinks! April Fools! [holds up a mirror] To me! [laughs obnoxiously and walks outside and towards work. Squidward sees him] ;s1e38_11 Mr. Krabs ; [over phone] What'd you catch? ;s1e38_12 Squidward; I caught sight of the calendar. ;s1e38_13 Mr. Krabs ; Oh, hold on, Squidward, there's someone here to see you. He says he's from the Barnacle Bay Art Museum and he wants to honor you as artist of the month. ;s1e38_14 {system}; [Squidward runs to the Krusty Krab with an artist uniform on] ;s1e38_15 {system}; [SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs laugh more] ;s1e38_16 Mr. Krabs ; You just missed him. ;s1e38_17 SpongeBob; Yeah, but he told us to tell you... ;s1e38_18 Squidward; Tell me what? ;s1e38_19 SpongeBob; [whispers into Squidward's ear] He told me to tell you... April Fools. ;s1e38_20 Squidward; [lays his hat on the table] Well, it's been nice working here. [he walks off] Thanks for everything, Mr. Krabs. ;s1e38_21 SpongeBob; Squidward, wait! ;s1e38_22 Squidward; Just send my last check to the P.O. box, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e38_23 SpongeBob; Wait, Squidward! [grabs Squidward's legs] It was just a joke! No more jokes on you today, I promise! ;s1e38_24 Squidward; You do? ;s1e38_25 SpongeBob; Sure, there are lots of other willing participants. Right, Mr. Krabs? ;s1e38_26 {system}; [bubble transition to SpongeBob carrying a tray of burger patties when Incidental 93 comes by] ;s1e38_27 Incidental 93 ; Excuse me, could you tell me where the forks are? ;s1e38_28 SpongeBob; They're right here, lady! [leads her to the utensils] ;s1e38_29 SpongeBob; April Fools! [laughs : Squidward stares at SpongeBob and he runs away : bubble transition to SpongeBob behind the register : Incidental 41 comes up to him] Welcome to the Krusty Krab. How may I help you? ;s1e38_30 Incidental 41 ; [raises up his left arm] Yeah, give me two large fries and a Jumbo Krabby Patty. ;s1e38_31 SpongeBob; [points at something] Hey, what's that? ;s1e38_32 {system}; [Incidental 41 turns around : SpongeBob turns around and has a smiley face on his back] ;s1e38_33 Incidental 41 ; Well, I didn't see anything. [notices that SpongeBob is gone] Hey, where'd that other guy go? ;s1e38_34 {system}; [SpongeBob turns around] ;s1e38_35 SpongeBob; April Fools! I'm right here! ;s1e38_36 Incidental 41 ; [laughs] Hey, that was pretty good. ;s1e38_37 {system}; [Bubble transition to SpongeBob wiping the floor : Incidental 6 comes by with a cup of soda] ;s1e38_38 Incidental 6 ; Excuse me, can I get a couple of ice cubes in here, please? ;s1e38_39 SpongeBob; Sure! A couple of ice cubes coming up! [fills the cup with ice and comes back whistling] Here you go. ;s1e38_40 Incidental 6 ; Thanks. [he takes a sip of his drink : SpongeBob titters and Incidental 6 looks at him, but SpongeBob stops before Incidental 6 turns around] Huh? [SpongeBob is silent, so Incidental 6 takes another sip of his drink : SpongeBob starts giggling again and then Incidental 6 turns around and looks at him, but SpongeBob stops before he turns around] Huh? [SpongeBob is silent, so Incidental 6 finishes his drink] Ah... ;s1e38_41 SpongeBob; [laughs loudly and obnoxiously] April Fools! [Incidental 6 grabs SpongeBob by the collar, suddenly panicked] ;s1e38_42 Incidental 6 ; What did you do to my drink?! ;s1e38_43 Incidental 6 ; You what?! ;s1e38_44 SpongeBob; You asked for a couple of ice cubes in your drink, and I only put in one! [laughs] ;s1e38_45 Incidental 6 ; I guess that is pretty funny. [laughs as he walks off] Yeah. ;s1e38_46 SpongeBob; [laughs so hard his tongue pops off] Hey, your shoes untied. [tongue looks down] April Fools! You're not wearing shoes! [laughs and hugs his tongue, which smiles. Then they laugh into the microphone : everyone hears it : in the kitchen, Squidward tries to mute the sound with tissues, but he can still hear it] April Fools! [Squidward drops a plate] ;s1e38_47 Squidward; That's it! SpongeBob and his stupid pranks! I'm going to show him what a real prank is all about! [bubble transition to him squirting some mustard inside a rope circle then he chuckles and shows SpongeBob the mess] ;s1e38_48 SpongeBob; Oh, boy! Something for me to clean up! [starts cleaning it and Squidward is standing next to a rope which he is about to cut] ;s1e38_49 Squidward; April Fools! [laughs as he cuts the rope which grabs SpongeBob] ;s1e38_50 SpongeBob; Whooaahh! [the rope sends him into some bags of flour. Squidward is laughing through all of this and rolls on the floor. Then SpongeBob is taken around a bar] Whoa! Blblblblblblbl... [screams as he is sent slamming face-first into the wall] ;s1e38_51 Customers; Oh, no! ;s1e38_52 {system}; [Squidward's eyes pop out as he laughs hysterically. SpongeBob screams and flies into Bubble Bass' rear] ;s1e38_53 SpongeBob; Whoooaa! [Cut to Squidward cheerleading, laughing, and jumping into the air. Then SpongeBob smashes into the ceiling] ;s1e38_54 Squidward; [runs and holds out his arms to catch SpongeBob] I'll catch you, SpongeBob! [he giggles to himself. SpongeBob screams as he plummets toward Squidward, who quickly sets out a garbage can in front of him, and SpongeBob falls into the goop in the can] Oops. [dumps SpongeBob, who is now the shape of the can, out of the garbage can] April Fools, you little sausage! [he laughs : SpongeBob sobs hysterically and runs out of the Krusty Krab] SpongeBob! I was just kidding! C'mon, c'mon. You guys know I was just kidding… Right? ;s1e38_55 Incidental 37 ; Aww, man, poor kid. ;s1e38_56 Incidental 45 ; That guy has definitely got some issues to work out. [The customers angrily glare at Squidward as they begin to leave] ;s1e38_57 Incidental 71 ; April Fools... jerk. [All the customers storm out the door in disgust as Squidward starts to look upset by their reaction] ;s1e38_58 Squidward; Wait, don't go! ;s1e38_59 Man; Hey, you stink! ;s1e38_60 Squidward;" Wait, wait, wait, it was a joke! Uh-huh... [looks around at the mess he has made and winces, then he looks at Bubble Bass, who has a hole in his bottom due to the ""prank"" and Squidward starts to feel ashamed of himself] Why is it whenever I'm having fun, it's wrong? I didn't mean to make him cry. I guess this means I'd better tell SpongeBob I'm sor-eaach. [makes silly face] Huh? I guess this means I'd better apolo- [throat goes haywire] gii! This is gonna be tougher than I thought. [bubble transition to Squidward going to SpongeBob's pineapple : he knocks on SpongeBob's door] SpongeBob? Uh, SpongeBob, come out! I've got something to tell you! SpongeBob? [notices a Krusty Krab hat and goes over there to talk to the man who is wearing it] Uhh, I was thinking about today and uh… and it just seems that I may owe you some sort of… This isn't something I normally do, so, listen carefully SpongeBob, because I am about to tell you that I'm... What? [notices that the guy with the hat on is Patrick] Patrick?! What are you doing here?! ";s1e38_61 Squidward; Why are you wearing that hat? ;s1e38_62 Squidward; [growls] Where's SpongeBob? ;s1e38_63 Squidward; With what? ;s1e38_64 Patrick; I don't know, but it must've been pretty good to make him cry like that. ;s1e38_65 Squidward; SpongeBob, I just want to say that I'm sorr-yyyy. [sticks out tongue while talking] ;s1e38_66 SpongeBob;What?;s1e38_67 Squidward; I'm trying to say I'm [turns into a donkey and starts braying] haw-hee-haw! ;s1e38_68 SpongeBob; [opens the door wider] What?! ;s1e38_69 Squidward; I'm just trying to say I'm... [voice muffled after his head explodes] There's gotta be an easier way to do this. [bubble transition to Squidward writing a note : he puts it in a bottle and rolls it to SpongeBob where he picks it up] Well, aren't you going to open it? ;s1e38_70 SpongeBob; I can't. I don't have a bottle opener. ;s1e38_71 Squidward; Doh! [Squidward hands SpongeBob a can and Squidward drives to the other side of the road] SpongeBob, I'm... [whispers into the can, then puts the can up to his ear but hears some sort of noise : Patrick is flossing his teeth with the cord : Squidward growls and throws the binoculars down on the ground] SpongeBob, all I am trying to say is that I am... [waves tentacles in the air and bubbles form, puts a big bubble on his head and then talks] ...sorry. [pops the bubble] There you go. ;s1e38_72 SpongeBob; But I couldn't... [Squidward slams the door in his face] ;s1e38_73 Squidward; I don't care! I said it! My conscience is clear! [Starts to walk away, when an image of Patrick appears in the air] ;s1e38_74 Patrick; Must've been pretty good to make him cry like that. ;s1e38_75 {system}; [Squidward nervously continues walking and runs into a ghost image of Incidental 6 (repeating Incidental 71's line from earlier)] ;s1e38_76 Incidental 6 ; April Fools... jerk. ;s1e38_77 {system}; [Squidward frantically starts running again, but this time his mother appears] ;s1e38_78 Mrs. Tentacles ; [male voice] You stink! ;s1e38_79 Squidward; Mother?! [runs back to SpongeBob's house to apologize] All right, all right! I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I admit it, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you, in fact, SpongeBob, I like you! I like living next door, I like hearing your foghorn alarm in the morning and your high-pitched giggling at night! I also like Gary, Patrick, Sandy, Mr. Krabs, and all the other people I'm forced to be in contact with! And, and, and, and... [SpongeBob opens the door slightly] ;s1e38_80 SpongeBob; Squidward! Is all that true? ;s1e38_81 Squidward; Yes, yes, SpongeBob. Yes, it's all true. ;s1e38_82 SpongeBob; Even the part about the lima beans and the car chase? ;s1e38_83 Squidward; What the...? Yes, yes, whatever! But you have to promise not to tell anybody. ;s1e38_84 SpongeBob; I promise. ;s1e38_85 Squidward; Really? [SpongeBob opens the door all the way, revealing the citizens of Bikini Bottom inside] ;s1e38_86 Everyone; April Fools! ;s1e38_87 Squidward; [eye twitches] April Fools! You're right, April Fools! I just fooled you all! [laughs hysterically while going back into his house] ;s1e38_88 SpongeBob; What would we do without Squidward? ;s1e38_89 {system}; [SpongeBob Patrick are browsing through Fry Cook Museum making noises at every rare item they see] ;s1e39_1 SpongeBob; Behold the ultimate cooking utensil, the golden spatula! ;s1e39_2 {system}; [Larry tries to pull the spatula out] ;s1e39_3 Patrick; Hey, SpongeBob, look what it says here. [reads plaque] Many have tried to pull the spatula from this ancient grease, but all have failed. ;s1e39_4 Larry; [Makes a straining noise after the golden spatula springs back.] ;s1e39_5 SpongeBob; Only a fry cook worthy of King Neptune himself can wield... ;s1e39_6 Patrick; ...the golden spatula. Wow! ;s1e39_7 SpongeBob; Oh, oh, oh, oh! Take a picture of me and the spatula! [SpongeBob runs up to the spatula and holds it] Okay, I'm ready! [Patrick is about to take a picture] ;s1e39_8 {system}; [Patrick gets confused and drools] ;s1e39_9 Patrick;Uh!;s1e39_10 SpongeBob; Menu section? That's easy, it's over that way. [SpongeBob pulls the spatula out and gray clouds appear above him] Uh-oh. ;s1e39_11 Patrick; Rude. Hey, the light changed. ;s1e39_12 SpongeBob; Uhh, Patrick... ;s1e39_13 {system}; [lightning bolts strike] ;s1e39_14 Patrick; Hold on, almost there. [clouds open to a mysterious figure comes out that is known as] ;s1e39_15 SpongeBob; Uhh, I did, Mr. Neptune, sir. SpongeBob SquarePants. ;s1e39_16 KingNeptune; A fine jest, boy. You are but a lowly yellow sponge. ;s1e39_17 {system}; [As King Neptune insults SpongeBob each time, SpongeBob goes droopier, 3x] ;s1e39_18 KingNeptune; Puny, insignificant, a commoner. Therefore, you could never be fry cook to a god and this is why it is funny! [laughs] Now step aside as I seek out the true fry cook. [searches for the real spatula taker] No, no. Mmm-hmm, you're too short, no... [soon comes up to a hot dog stand] Ah! ;s1e39_19 SpongeBob; But, but... ;s1e39_20 KingNeptune; A purveyor of foods. [chuckles] Yes, you must be my new fry cook. ;s1e39_21 HotDogVendor; Uhh, sorry, King Neptune. I don't make them. I just sell them. ;s1e39_22 KingNeptune; Then who pulled out the spatula? ;s1e39_23 HotDogVendor; [scoffs at Neptune] Uh, he did. [points to SpongeBob] ;s1e39_24 KingNeptune; [everyone laughs] It is even funnier a second time! [destroys the hot dog stand with his fist] You there, crustacean! ;s1e39_25 Larry; Who, me? ;s1e39_26 KingNeptune; [laughs] Make poses with me! ;s1e39_27 Larry;Okay!;s1e39_28 Larry; Nope, that was SpongeBob. ;s1e39_29 {system}; [SpongeBob smiles] ;s1e39_30 KingNeptune; This joke has gone far enough! Where's my fry cook? [Everyone runs away except Patrick] Certainly you with your prodigious girth would know who can flip a burger to suit a royal palate! ;s1e39_31 {system}; [Patrick points to SpongeBob] ;s1e39_32 KingNeptune; What? Am I expected to believe this creature is royal fry cook material? I don't suppose you have any proof? ;s1e39_33 {system}; [Patrick shows the photo he took of SpongeBob holding the spatula] ;s1e39_34 KingNeptune; Ha! This thing is unfit to even scrub the royal tail fin! And besides, it's not just enough to pull a spatula from a greasy griddle. There are certain qualities that a royal fry cook must have. ;s1e39_35 SpongeBob;Like?;s1e39_36 KingNeptune; [snaps fingers] Also, the royal fry cook wears red underwear. [SpongeBob shows his red underwear] No, blue. [SpongeBob shows his blue underwear] Uh, the royal fry cook's wallet contains... [SpongeBob takes out his wallet] His big toes are... [SpongeBob gets ready to show something about his foot] Uhh, he has six... ;s1e39_37 Patrick; [contemptuously mocks Neptune] He is the new royal fry cook and you... ;s1e39_38 KingNeptune; [shouting] Silence! [zaps Patrick and he is black with white smoke] ;s1e39_39 Patrick; Is it hot in here or what? [falls over] ;s1e39_40 SpongeBob; [gasp] Patrick! You hurt my friend! You're not a king, you're a bully and a liar! ;s1e39_41 KingNeptune; [grabs SpongeBob] So, little one, you think you have what it takes to be my fry cook? I will prove your worthlessness. You shall be tested with a challenge! ;s1e39_42 KingNeptune; Your friend's arrogance will cost you dearly. There will be two challenges. ;s1e39_43 Patrick; [mocks Neptune again] Only two? One or two challenges to someone like Sponge? [Patrick gets zapped and burn down again] ;s1e39_44 KingNeptune; Three challenges! ;s1e39_45 Patrick; Three? [laughs contemptuously] [mocks Neptune with sarcasm] Three challenges are nothing. It might as well be... 500 challenges! [Patrick gets zapped and burn down again] ;s1e39_46 KingNeptune; Enough! [Patrick gets zapped into a dust pile for burn down Patrick] ;s1e39_47 Patrick; He'll settle for one. ;s1e39_48 KingNeptune; There will be but one challenge. You will face me in: The Ultimate Cook-Off! ;s1e39_49 SpongeBob; I will accept your challenge if you fix my friend. ;s1e39_50 KingNeptune; Ah, yes, the round one. I shall restore him. [Patrick gets zapped to normal] ;s1e39_51 Patrick; SpongeBob? SpongeBob?! [turns around as we see that his face is now on the bottom of his body above his legs] SpongeBob? Oh, there you are! ;s1e39_52 SpongeBob; How you feeling? ;s1e39_53 Patrick; Pretty good. Say, have you gotten taller? ;s1e39_54 KingNeptune; And now, see the fate that may lie ahead. ;s1e39_55 {system}; [King Neptune summons the clouds] ;s1e39_56 KingNeptune; For if some minute chance you meet the challenge, your reward will be great. [opens the clouds] Behold! [shows Tom Kenny taking a shower and he screams : Neptune quickly closes the portal and chuckles sheepishly] Hehe. Whoopsie! Now, behold! [opens the clouds again and shows the city of Atlantis] My beloved home of Atlantis. A prize worthy of Apollo. You will reside here in this glorious palace, cook only for me, and be a god! ;s1e39_57 Patrick; Hey, that sounds pretty good. ;s1e39_58 KingNeptune; But if you should not succeed, you must give up fry cooking... [looks forward to the screen] ...forever! [goes back to normal pose] What do you say? ;s1e39_59 SpongeBob; I'm ready. ;s1e39_60 {system}; [King Neptune produces lightning, taking them all to the Poseidome.] ;s1e39_61 {system}; [Everyone cheers] ;s1e39_62 {system}; [King Neptune and SpongeBob shake hands. SpongeBob's arm disintegrates.] ;s1e39_63 SpongeBob; [regrows his hand] May the best man win. ;s1e39_64 Patrick;" Don't give up on your dream, SpongeBob! People used to tell me: ""Patrick, you'll never amount to anything. You'll always have your head in the clouds."" Well, just look at me now. ";s1e39_65 {system}; [Bell dings] ;s1e39_66 Patrick; Go get 'em, tiger! ;s1e39_67 {system}; [King Neptune starts making his Krabby Patties and so does SpongeBob. Upon beginning, King Neptune summons two seahorses from the sky, which later put on his apron. SpongeBob puts his Krusty Krab Hat on.] ;s1e39_68 {system}; [King Neptune makes his very quickly with help from sea creatures and his magic. SpongeBob takes his time going through each important step to make sure his patty comes out right. King Neptune summons large amounts of wheat from the ground and zaps them into buns.] ;s1e39_69 {system}; [King Neptune summons the vegetables, and summons the swordfish to slice them all. SpongeBob makes sure a tomato is perfectly aligned. He carefully slices the tomato with the golden spatula.] ;s1e39_70 {system}; [King Neptune zaps the patties, while SpongeBob rubs sticks to create a fire. King Neptune uses magic to flip hundreds of patties. SpongeBob patiently waits for the patty to cook above the campfire.] ;s1e39_71 {system};" [King Neptune uses magic to assemble the hundreds of burgers that appear like Krabby Patties. King Neptune laughs while the burgers rain down. SpongeBob puts ketchup on two pickles to apply faces on them. He applies a cheese ""blanket,"" kisses a pickle.] ";s1e39_72 SpongeBob; [reading a bedtime story to the pickles] Once upon a time... ;s1e39_73 {system}; [King Neptune still laughs, while the burgers assemble in a square-based pyramid. SpongeBob puts the top bun on his one Krabby Patty.] ;s1e39_74 SpongeBob;Perfect!;s1e39_75 {system}; [In the end, the score is KingNeptune: 1000 and SpongeBob: 1] ;s1e39_76 KingNeptune; I win! ;s1e39_77 {system}; [The crowd cheers, including Mr. Krabs. SpongeBob takes his hat off in defeat.] ;s1e39_78 KingNeptune; Loser! [Chuckles] Free patties for everyone! ;s1e39_79 {system}; [Everyone chews a bite out of the patties that King Neptune made and they spit it out immediately] ;s1e39_80 KingNeptune; Fools! Have you no taste buds? There's nothing wrong with these, they're delicious! [sniffs one] Ooh. ;s1e39_81 Audience; [Everyone complains different complaints that King Neptune needs to try one of his burgers] You can eat it all, come on! Too chicken to eat his own burger! Chew it! Why don't you eat it? Try it! Eat it! Eat it! ;s1e39_82 KingNeptune; [throws his burger out] Okay, mine's no good. But what makes you think his will be any better? [King Neptune grabs a patty from SpongeBob] Give me that! ;s1e39_83 {system}; [King Neptune eats it and begins to like it] ;s1e39_84 KingNeptune; Mmmm. Why it tastes so good, I think I'd like to try it a second time! ;s1e39_85 {system}; [King Neptune spits it out and eats it again : the crowd groans in disgust.] ;s1e39_86 SpongeBob; So, uhh, what do you think? ;s1e39_87 KingNeptune; Yours is superior. Therefore, I concede to you, SpongeBob SquarePants, you win. ;s1e39_88 {system}; [The crowd cheers] ;s1e39_89 SpongeBob; Yeah! [both dancing] We're going to Atlantis! We're going to Atlantis! ;s1e39_90 KingNeptune;[laughs];s1e39_91 SpongeBob; What's so funny? ;s1e39_92 KingNeptune; You, SpongeBob. That repulsive thing in my palace? ;s1e39_93 SpongeBob; You mean, Patrick can't come? ;s1e39_94 KingNeptune; [laughs] No, of course not. ;s1e39_95 SpongeBob; And my friends? ;s1e39_96 KingNeptune; Ah, the only friend you need, dear boy, is the royal grill. ;s1e39_97 Patrick; [crying and wiping his tears with a tissue] It was nice knowing you, buddy! ;s1e39_98 {system}; [Mr. Krabs cries] ;s1e39_99 SpongeBob; I know, Mr. Krabs, I'll miss you, too. ;s1e39_100 Mr. Krabs ; I lost me bet! ;s1e39_101 KingNeptune; Come, SpongeBob, grab your things! It's time to depart... [a two-seater bike appears] ...to Atlantis![rings bell] ;s1e39_102 SpongeBob; I... I... [cries about the house] I don't wanna go! ;s1e39_103 KingNeptune; It's too late now. I can't live without your burgers. You're going to be a god and like it! ;s1e39_104 {system}; [King Neptune zaps SpongeBob and he becomes a muscular god. But being the same size, he looks a little strange] ;s1e39_105 KingNeptune; Maybe we do have a problem. ;s1e39_106 SpongeBob; [in a booming voice] Wait, Neptune! I have another idea! [summons lightning] ;s1e39_107 {system}; [Cut to the outside of the Krusty Krab. Patrick walks in the Krusty Krab still looking the same when King Neptune changed him back to normal but with his face on the bottom] ;s1e39_108 Patrick; Good morning, Krusty Krew. ;s1e39_109 SpongeBob; Hi, Patrick. What'll you have? ;s1e39_110 {system}; [Patrick drools stupidly then SpongeBob hears King Neptune shout] ;s1e39_111 SpongeBob; Can you excuse me? ;s1e39_112 KingNeptune; The accursed stove has burnt my finger. Feel thine own wrath, stove! [uses his powers to zap the stove] Haha! ;s1e39_113 SpongeBob; [in a stern voice] What did I tell you about using your powers, trainee? ;s1e39_114 KingNeptune; [Sighs. Embarrassedly puts arms behind his back.] Uh... Perfect patties are made with love, not magic. ;s1e39_115 {system}; [SpongeBob smiles] ;s1e39_116 French Narrator ; Fishermen have quite an effect on our undersea friends. [shows fishermen in boats fishing near the Bikini Bottom atoll] ;s1e40_1 Squidward; SpongeBob, have you finished swabbing the deck? ;s1e40_2 SpongeBob; Almost. There's a nasty barnacle under table 9. [uses himself as a cleaning tool] ;s1e40_3 Mr. Krabs ; [bursts frightfully in through the front doors of the Krusty Krab.] They're back! They're back, I tell ya! I saw it with me own eyes! [everyone looks at Mr. Krabs like he's crazy] The hooks! The hooks! ;s1e40_4 Fred; How about a mint? ;s1e40_5 Mr. Krabs ; The hooks! The hooks! ;s1e40_6 Tom; [standing next to Squidward, staring in Mr. Krabs' direction] Can you make that to go? ;s1e40_7 Squidward; [gives Tom his food in a bag] You don't know how lucky you are. ;s1e40_8 Squidward; I'd love to hear another of your riveting sea tales, but, um... I have to do my waste basket inspection. [puts a trashcan on his head] Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. There's one. ;s1e40_9 Mr. Krabs ; Fine. Don't say I didn't warn ya. ;s1e40_10 SpongeBob; [pops up in front of Mr. Krabs with white soap suds, formed to make a beard and long goatee on his face, the bubbles then all pop and disappear off his smiling face] Warn him about what, Mr. Krabs? ;s1e40_11 SpongeBob; The hooks?! ;s1e40_12 Mr. Krabs ; Aye! [shapes his arm like a hook as SpongeBob looks at his arm] The hooks. [The camera shows SpongeBob's frightened face with a reflection with Mr. Krabs' arm as a hook] They dangle down and draw you close with their pleasing shapes and their beguiling colors. And just when you think you found the land of milk and honey, they grab you by the britches... [grabs Scooter's pants and lifts high like he is giving him a wedgie. His drink decreases every time Mr. Krabs lifts his pants higher as he sips it until its completely gone] ...and haul you way up high! Then higher, and higher, and higher [he opens a hatch on the roof and points at the surface] until you're hauled up to the surface, flopping and gasping for breath! And then, they cook ya, and then, they eat ya, or worse...! ;s1e40_13 SpongeBob; [gasps] What could be worse than that?! ;s1e40_14 Mr. Krabs ; Gift shops. [shows gift shop and the inside of the gift shop] ;s1e40_15 Mr. Krabs ; There, there, boy. They won't get ya. Not as long as you listen to ol' Mr. Krabs. Now get back to the kitchen! Time is money! ;s1e40_16 SpongeBob; Aye, aye, Mr. Krabs! [goes in the kitchen with the box on him] ;s1e40_17 Patrick; [pokes his head through one of the kitchen windows] Good morning, Krusty Krew! ;s1e40_18 SpongeBob; Hey, Patrick. ;s1e40_19 Patrick; Guess what? The carnival's in town. Come on, let's go. ;s1e40_20 SpongeBob; I can't leave now. I'm working. ;s1e40_21 Patrick; It's not leaving. You're just taking a break. [SpongeBob goes outside behind unseen] We're going to the carnival, we're going to the carni... [trips and falls on face] We're going to the carnival, we're going to the carnival! There it is, SpongeBob. The carnival is back in town! [many hooks are dangling] I'm gonna be first in line for everything! ;s1e40_22 SpongeBob; Where is everybody? ;s1e40_23 Patrick; I don't know. There was one kid here, earlier. [a pair of kids' sneakers lie on the ground nearby] ;s1e40_24 SpongeBob; Doesn't look like any carnival I ever... [bumps into a hook] Excuse me. [gasps as he sees the hook as the camera shows SpongeBob's frightened again with the reflection with a hook] Stop, Patrick! Don't touch it! This isn't the carnival, Patrick! Those are hooks! Mr. Krabs says they're really dangerous! ;s1e40_25 Patrick; [sits on a hook] Hmmm... I sense no danger here. How can they be dangerous? [grabs a hook with cheese attached to it] They're covered with free cheese! ;s1e40_26 Patrick; Cheesy! No danger here. Go on, try it! [the hook where Patrick ate the cheese from is pulled up] ;s1e40_27 SpongeBob; [faces another hook with cheese attached to it] But, Mr. Krabs said... ;s1e40_28 Patrick; [has another hook with cheese attached to it] Lighten up, will ya?! Or do I have to eat all this cheese by mysel... [the hook pulls him up and he screams] ;s1e40_29 SpongeBob; [gasps] Patrick! Help! [starts running in circles] Oh, Patrick, help! Oh, Patrick, come back! Oh, my best friend! [Patrick floats down laughing while SpongeBob is still running in circles and SpongeBob runs into him as he hits the ground] Patrick, you're alive. ;s1e40_30 Patrick; Am I ever! You should try it. ;s1e40_31 SpongeBob; But...what about the surface, and your britches, and the gift shops? ;s1e40_32 Patrick; You just jump off before you go up too high. ;s1e40_33 SpongeBob; Mr. Krabs said I shouldn't get near those things. ;s1e40_34 Patrick; Did he say you shouldn't climb on top of them and ride them like a horsey? [he jumps and sits on a fish-like attachment on the hook and rocks back and forth on it] ;s1e40_35 SpongeBob; Well, no. ;s1e40_36 Patrick; Hi-Yo, Silverfish, away! [The hook pulls them up. We see a fisherman reeling in his fishing rod. We see SpongeBob and Patrick laughing out of enjoyment. The camera alternates between the fisherman and his partner to SpongeBob and Patrick still laughing. After a few cuts, SpongeBob and Patrick are about to jump off the hook] ;s1e40_37 SpongeBob;Ready?!;s1e40_38 Patrick;Ready!;s1e40_39 SpongeBob and Patrick ; Geronimo! [they jump off and float back down] ;s1e40_40 SpongeBob; This is more fun than double overtime at the Krusty Krab! [On the surface, the fishermen are having a smoke break, disappointed at having lost their catch. Cut to the exterior at the Krusty Krab when customers are muttering angrily. We cut to see Ivy angry with Harold] ;s1e40_41 Ivy; P.U.! [points at his Krabby Patty] You call this food?! ;s1e40_42 Harold; [Starts holding up his Krabby Patty shaped like a fried boot] My sandwich is a fried boot! ;s1e40_43 Fred; Hurry it up, will you?! We're hungry over here, look at us! My kids haven't eaten and I'll die! ;s1e40_44 {system}; [Fred angrily pokes his head into the kitchen window, other fish start to join] ;s1e40_45 Fred; [at Squidward] That's not how you're supposed to flip it! I've seen how he does it, that's wrong! [customers muttering angrily... all talking at once : Squidward frantically flipping burnt patties] ;s1e40_46 Incidental 1 ; Can't you see, we’re hungry?! ;s1e40_47 Incidental 2 ; Come on! ;s1e40_48 Incidental 3 ; I want a nice good meal! ;s1e40_49 Squidward; [defensive] Why do you want to eat this stuff anyway?! ;s1e40_50 Mr. Krabs ; Mr. Squidward! [peeks in through the kitchen door] What the halibut's going on in here?! ;s1e40_51 Squidward; It's a feeding frenzy, sir and SpongeBob's not back from his break! [Mr. Krabs laughs] What? ;s1e40_52 Mr. Krabs ; I thought you said SpongeBob was taking a break. No one's taken a break at the Krusty Krab since the Chum Famine of '59. [laughs] Now, what were you saying? ;s1e40_53 Squidward; He took a break. ;s1e40_54 Mr. Krabs ; [stares in shocked silence, as his arms and nose fall off. He then angrily storms out the front door] Alright, SpongeBob LazyPants! I'll find ya! This nose can smell laziness up to 10,000 leagues. [uses his nose to smell] Aha! I'll give you a break you'll not soon forget! ;s1e40_55 Squidward; But, Mr. Krabs, I still need help! [all the angry customers pick up Squidward like they are a mob] ;s1e40_56 Mr. Krabs ; [uses his nose to smell again] They should be right here. [SpongeBob and Patrick float down as they are laughing] ;s1e40_57 Patrick;Again?!;s1e40_58 SpongeBob;Again!;s1e40_59 Mr. Krabs ; The hooks! No! No! No! ;s1e40_60 Error: Could not extract speaker and replica from line. ; Error: Could not extract speaker and replica from line. ;s1e40_61 Mr. Krabs ; Boys! I wasn't quick enough! They're gone! [sadly sobs] If I can only hold them in me arms again, I'd...I'd... [SpongeBob and Patrick float back down while laughing] ... [angrily] I'd throttle 'em! What did I tell you about those hooks, boy?! ;s1e40_62 Patrick; I'll tell you about the hooks. You ride 'em up, and up, and up, then you gently float down. ;s1e40_63 Mr. Krabs ; And do you know what happens when you don't float back down?! ;s1e40_64 SpongeBob; We're sorry, Mr. Krabs! ;s1e40_65 Mr. Krabs ; I want you boys to promise me you'll never go on those hooks again. ;s1e40_66 SpongeBob; [raise hands] We promise, Mr. Krabs. ;s1e40_67 Mr. Krabs ; I need a sailor's promise! Repeat after me: Yo-ho, yo-ho, near the hooks I'll never go. ;s1e40_68 SpongeBob; Yo-ho, yo-ho, near the hooks we'll never go. ;s1e40_69 {system}; [a hook pokes Mr. Krabs in the butt] ;s1e40_70 Mr. Krabs ; [leaps up, holding his injured rear] Yowie! Mother of pearl! Fire on the poop deck! ;s1e40_71 SpongeBob; Ahh! Mother of pearl! Fire on the poop deck! [they turn and rub their own behinds] ;s1e40_72 Mr. Krabs ; Whoa, whew! Alright then. Let's get out of this death trap. [Cuts to the exterior of SpongeBob's house] ;s1e40_73 SpongeBob; Okay, Gary. Today is a new day. I'm ready to prove myself loyal to Mr. Krabs. ;s1e40_74 Gary;Meow.;s1e40_75 SpongeBob; I'm ready! [comes running out of the house] I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, ready, ready, I'm ready... [Patrick comes out from his rock] ;s1e40_76 Patrick; Hey, SpongeBob, you're going the wrong way! [crashes into his furniture] ;s1e40_77 SpongeBob; I always go to work this way. ;s1e40_78 Patrick; You're not going to work today. We're gonna go play hooky! [points to hooks dangling right across the street] ;s1e40_79 SpongeBob; But, Patrick, we promised! ;s1e40_80 Patrick; Well, I had my fingers crossed. ;s1e40_81 SpongeBob; You don't have any fingers, Patrick. ;s1e40_82 Patrick; Well, that Mr. Krabs is just a big dummy. We played on those hooks all day long and nothing happened to us. ;s1e40_83 SpongeBob; But Mr. Krabs said... ;s1e40_84 Patrick; Look, SpongeBob, are you gonna listen to a big dummy, or are you gonna listen to me? ;s1e40_85 SpongeBob;Umm...;s1e40_86 Patrick; See ya later, SpongeBob! I'm gonna go have some fun! [Patrick goes up and down the hooks] Wahoo! Come on, SpongeBob! Wahoo! You know you want to! ;s1e40_87 SpongeBob; [nervously] I know I want to, but I promised Mr. Krabs I wouldn't go near another... [almost runs into a hook. Gasps] hook! [almost touches the hook but takes it back] Oh, no! Mr. Krabs told me all about you! You are a liar! A deceiver! I'll never fall for your tricks again! Never! [goes back to the hook] Is this seat taken? Wa-hoo! [hook takes him up, but when he comes down and turns around, it is shown that he is hooked at the pants] Whew! Glad I got that out of my system. [gasps] I'm... hooked! And that means... [shows the tuna can with SpongeBob crammed inside then he screams] Help! I'm hooked! Help! Mr. Krabs! Help! It happened! I'm hooked! Oh, no! The hook! The hook! Gift shop, tuna can, mayonnaise! ;s1e40_88 Mr. Krabs ; Here you go, Pearl. Free water for all your little friends. ;s1e40_89 Pearl; Thanks, dad. ;s1e40_90 Mr. Krabs ; Just don't forget to leave a tip for ol' Mr. Krabs. ;s1e40_91 SpongeBob; Psst, Mr. Krabs. ;s1e40_92 Mr. Krabs ; SpongeBob! You're two minutes late. What kept you, laddie? ;s1e40_93 SpongeBob; Um, you know those hooks we were talking about yesterday? ;s1e40_94 Mr. Krabs ; Didn't I tell you not to go near those hooks? ;s1e40_95 SpongeBob; Um... no. [the hook pulls him a little closer] I mean yes! Yes, you told me not to go near them! ;s1e40_96 Mr. Krabs ; Well, you weren't playing on those hooks, were you, laddie? ;s1e40_97 SpongeBob; Of course not. [the hook pulls him a little closer] I mean, not exactly. [the hook pulls him a little closer] I mean yes! Yes, I did it! I admit it! [cries] Oh, Mr. Krabs! I'm so ashamed! I mean, look at me! I'm hooked! [shows the hook in his pants to Mr. Krabs] ;s1e40_98 Mr. Krabs ; Hmm... it's in there pretty deep. ;s1e40_99 SpongeBob; What am I gonna do? ;s1e40_100 Mr. Krabs ; There's only one thing to do, boy. [Pearl and her friends laugh. SpongeBob looks at his pants] ;s1e40_101 SpongeBob; Oh, no, Mr. Krabs! I can't take off my pants! Not in front of all these girls! [the hook pulls him closer] D’oh, okay! I'm taking 'em off! I'm taking 'em off! [takes his pants off] There. ;s1e40_102 Mr. Krabs ; Uh... lad? ;s1e40_103 {system}; [the hook is shown to be also hooked in SpongeBob's underwear, while Pearl and her friends laugh again] ;s1e40_104 SpongeBob; [screams] Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, Mr. Krabs! I can't do it! Anything but that! ;s1e40_105 Mr. Krabs ;" I understand. You were a good little fry cook, SpongeBob. [he places a ""Help Wanted"" sign on the door as SpongeBob gasps and his eyes shrinks down in horror] But, we'll find another. Hopefully one that will listen to ol' Mr. Krabs. ";s1e40_106 SpongeBob; [the hook pulls him a little closer] Oh, Mr. Krabs! I'll listen! I promise! [He grabs on to a flower but the hook pulls him away. He holds on to the Krusty Krab signpost] No! Whoa! Please save me, Mr. Krabs! [cries] I promise I'll be good! [his underwear tears off] Whew. [the signpost flings him into the door naked, which makes the girls laugh] ;s1e40_107 Girls; Ooh, look! [all laugh] ;s1e40_108 Pearl; It's SpongeBob NudiePants! [SpongeBob screams and runs as Pearl and her friends laughs some more] ;s1e40_109 Squidward; [holding a fishing rod with SpongeBob's underwear on the hook] Well, that was more of SpongeBob than I needed to see. ;s1e40_110 Mr. Krabs ; Mr. Squidward, that was some fine angling. Do you think the lad has learned his lesson? ;s1e40_111 Squidward; Oh, I think he'll remember this for a long time. I know I will. ;s1e40_112 SpongeBob; The pants! The underwear! [As it shows SpongeBob running back to his house, Squidward's and Mr. Krab's laughing and SpongeBob's cries are both heard] ;s1e40_113 Patrick; [bus drops off a can of tuna] Hello? Does somebody have a can opener? ;s1e40_114 {system}; [The exterior of SpongeBob's pineapple is shown.] ;s1e41_1 French Narrator ; Ah, [the scene pan-fades into the house.] Saturday morning in Bikini Bottom. [The living room is shown. SpongeBob is next to his chair at the table that normally holds the shellphone. He is sitting on a stool. On the table, there is a box of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy Bran Flakes and a Mermaid Man Bowl.] SpongeBob is watching his favorite Saturday morning show: [The scene pans into SpongeBob.] The Adventures of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. [It cuts to a medium shot of the cereal and bowl.] Enjoying a bowl of Mermaid Man [SpongeBob grabs the box and pours in the cereal. The breakfast biters fall out.] and Barnacle Boy Bran Cereal, [SpongeBob tosses the box away and grabs the breakfast biters.] and wearing the official Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy breakfast biters. ;s1e41_2 TVAnnouncer; Mermaid Man... [SpongeBob smiles.] fleet [The TV is shown. Mermaid Man is hooked down.] and forceful! [The scene quickly pans into the TV, showing what is on it.] By the power of Neptune. Aided by his young ward... [nothing happens] Aided by his young ward... [Barnacle Boy comes dolling down with a rope attached to him and crashes] ...protecting the sea with feats of strength and agility. [both try to flex their muscles, but break their backs. They both look at each other.] ;s1e41_3 MermaidMan; To the chiropractor! Away! ;s1e41_4 {system}; [A live action glove of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy come together and transition to the next scene, which features a spotlight of cardboard cutouts of the Sinister Slug, Atomic Flounder, and Jumbo Shrimp.] ;s1e41_5 TVAnnouncer;" Fighting a rogues gallery of villains [Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy jump into the scene. It then cuts to a close-up of the Sinister Slug cutout.] Like the Sinister Slug, [Barnacle Boy hits it and a pow-bubble with ""PROP!"" appears. It cuts to a medium shot of the Atomic Flounder cutout.] the Atomic Flounder... [Mermaid Man kicks it and a pow-bubble with ""CARDBOARD!"" appears. It cuts to a wide shot of the cut out of the Jumbo Shrimp.] and the dreaded Jumbo Shrimp! [Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy punch it. A pow-bubble with ""LAME"" appears. It cuts to a medium shot of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy with their rings.] Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy [It cuts to a close-up of the hands joining.] unite! [when the rings unite, sparks appear and then is starts to smoke up. The ""Mermaid Man & : Barnacle Boy"" title card appears. The Realistic Fish Head then appears on a watery background.] ";s1e41_6 RealisticFishHead; Hey, kids, are you ready to hear the winner of this week's contest? ;s1e41_7 {system}; [The scene cuts to SpongeBob. He grabs his TV.] ;s1e41_8 {system}; [The scene cuts to show a close up of the TV, which has a close up of the Realistic Fish Head.] ;s1e41_9 RealisticFishHead; Our winner will receive a special secret collector's [Red question marks appear and fade next to the Realistic Fish Head's head.] item from The Adventures of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy! [a small card comes down] And the winner is... [It cuts to SpongeBob, who chatters his teeth. It then cuts back to the Realistic Fish Head, who is now wearing glasses.] SpringBoob SquirePin. ;s1e41_10 {system}; [The scene cuts back to SpongeBob, who now has Gary next to him.] ;s1e41_11 {system}; [The scene cuts back to back to the TV, where the Realistic Fish Head is in front of the Krabby Patty mannequins.] ;s1e41_12 RealisticFishHead; ...for these life-size Krabby Patty mannequins of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. ;s1e41_13 {system}; [The scene cuts back to SpongeBob and Gary.] ;s1e41_14 SpongeBob; Hey! SpringBoob SquirePin stole my idea! ;s1e41_15 RealisticFishHead; [a phone drops and the fish on the other line talks quickly and indistinguishably.] What's that? Oh. It appears I've made a slight error in pronunciation. [It cuts to his full-body.] The real name of the winner is... [It cuts to SpongeBob and Gary.] SpongeBob SquarePants! ;s1e41_16 {system}; [The scene cuts to the exterior of the pineapple.] ;s1e41_17 SpongeBob; [While the house jumps around] Whahoo! [It cuts to SpongeBob.] Oh, I wonder when my [The scene pans out to show the Newsie Fish, holding a package.] prize will... [SpongeBob notices the fish.] get here... [SpongeBob takes the package.] My prize! [SpongeBob starts to cry and the Newsie fish holds out a tissue box. SpongeBob grabs the tissue and the Newsie fish runs away. SpongeBob kneels down and sets down the box. It tears open the box. He gasps.] Can it be? It is. [The scene changes angles to show the back of SpongeBob, from a distance.] The conch signal. [He turns around and holds up the conch signal.] From The Adventures of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. [He turns back around and then holds up conch signal again.] As seen on TV. [The scene cuts to a mid-shot of SpongeBob holding the conch signal close to himself.] I wonder if it still works. ;s1e41_18 {system}; [SpongeBob runs to window and blows into it. The scene cuts to the exterior of Shady Shoals as the conch signal continues. It then cuts to Mermaid Man, who is sleeping and Barnacle Boy, sitting on their couch, inside. Mermaid Man wakes up.] ;s1e41_19 MermaidMan; The conch signal! [He and Barnacle Boy jump up.] To the Invisible Boatmobile! ;s1e41_20 {system}; [Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy then jump back into their seats. The couch turns around and the run, reveals an underground passage way. The couch's back bends backwards, sending them down a slide.] ;s1e41_21 BarnacleBoy; [While they are sliding.] Ah! Ooh! Oh! Oh! Ah! Ah! Ooh! ;s1e41_22 {system}; [The two then start falling downwards, upright because the slide corrected their position, into the Mermalair. Their butts start to catch fire. The two stop in mid-air, which puts out the fire.] ;s1e41_23 BarnacleBoy; Uh, Mermaid Man? ;s1e41_24 MermaidMan; Yes, Barnacle Boy? ;s1e41_25 BarnacleBoy; We're not in the Invisible Boatmobile, are we? ;s1e41_26 BarnacleBoy; I told you making the boatmobile invisible was a stupid idea. ;s1e41_27 MermaidMan; Boatmobile! Come out, come out, wherever you are. ;s1e41_28 {system}; [Barnacle Boy sits down.] ;s1e41_29 BarnacleBoy; Ignition... [As he pushes a button] on. ;s1e41_30 MermaidMan; Throttle... [As he pulls a lever up] on. ;s1e41_31 {system}; [The Invisible Boatmobile goes through a corridor. The exterior of Shady Shoals is shown. The ramp leading to the front goes up, and the Invisible Boatmobile flies out of it. It then goes around a corner. The scene cuts back to SpongeBob] ;s1e41_32 SpongeBob; Hmm. [He goes back inside to Gary.] Maybe the conch signal doesn't work anymore. ;s1e41_33 {system}; [Gary meows. An entire roaring, then a tire screeching, then a stray snail screeching are heard outside.] ;s1e41_34 MermaidMan; [Off-screen] Activate torpedo mode! Fire! [His head crashes through the wall, next to SpongeBob's door.] Mermaid Man... ;s1e41_35 {system}; [Barnacle Boy's head crashes through the door, causing the wheel on the interior to fall off.] ;s1e41_36 SpongeBob; I can't believe it, Gary. Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy in our home. ;s1e41_37 {system}; [SpongeBob runs to the door and Gary meows. Mermaid Man dusts off Barnacle Boy.] ;s1e41_38 SpongeBob; Excuse me, I'm... ;s1e41_39 MermaidMan; [points at SpongeBob] Oh, my Neptune! He's been horribly disfigured! Oh, blast us! We're too late! ;s1e41_40 BarnacleBoy; Oh, please. He's not disfigured. He's-he's just that sponge kid again. ;s1e41_41 MermaidMan; Oh, yeah. Good to see you, lad. Say, Barnacle Boy, we gotta find out where that conch signal came from. ;s1e41_42 MermaidMan; Alright. Where's the danger, son? Bring it on. Bring it on! ;s1e41_43 SpongeBob; Don't worry. There's no danger. ;s1e41_44 BarnacleBoy; No danger? ;s1e41_45 BarnacleBoy; Look, there has to be danger. You blew the conch signal. When you blow the... where'd you get that thing anyway? ;s1e41_46 SpongeBob; I won it in a contest. ;s1e41_47 Mermaid Man ; [Off-screen] Contest? ;s1e41_48 MermaidMan; They don't tell us anything anymore. ;s1e41_49 BarnacleBoy; Look, Spongy, that ain't no toy. ;s1e41_50 MermaidMan; That's right. The conch signal is an awesome responsibility. We're duty-bound to help whenever it sounds. ;s1e41_51 BarnacleBoy; But you only blow it when there's trouble, or there'll be trouble. You got that? ;s1e41_52 SpongeBob; Yes, sirs! ;s1e41_53 MermaidMan; Good boy. ;s1e41_54 {system}; [Mermaid Man pats SpongeBob on the head. He and Barnacle Boy leave. Mermaid Man turns back and he and SpongeBob point at each other and make a clicking noise.] ;s1e41_55 BarnacleBoy; [tapping his foot] Come on, come on, [Mermaid Man turns around.] come on. They're serving meatloaf today. ;s1e41_56 {system}; [Mermaid Man walks out the door.] ;s1e41_57 MermaidMan; [As he and Barnacle Boy walk away, SpongeBob walks to the door.] Oh, goody. ;s1e41_58 SpongeBob; Don't worry, Mermaid Man. You won't be hearing from me for just anything. Only for the big emergencies. ;s1e41_59 {system}; [The bubble transition goes to the interior of Shady Shoals, where Barnacle Boy, who is wearing a swimsuit, bangs on the bathroom door.] ;s1e41_60 {system}; [The conch signal is heard. Mermaid Man, who is wearing a towel, kicks down the door, which lands on top of Barnacle Boy.] ;s1e41_61 {system}; [Mermaid Man runs away.] ;s1e41_62 {system}; [Mermaid Man jumps onto the couch. Barnacle Boy, holding his swimsuit, wobbles onto the chair. Because the two entered the couch too quickly, a spring goes back and springs them forward through the rug, down onto the slide. They slide down on their faces first, and Mermaid Man's towel flies off. The whirlpool transition shows a bird's eye-view of SpongeBob's living room. He is laying on the ground with his eyes shut and his tongue out. Gary is next to him. There is also a spot light on him. The tire squealing and the cat shrieking is second yowl is heard. The angle changes. Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy run into the living room. Mermaid Man stands behind Gary and Barnacle Boy gives Mermaid Man a new towel. Gary crawls away.] ;s1e41_63 MermaidMan; Oh... youth! Cut down in its prime! [SpongeBob moans.] Oh, speak to me, son. ;s1e41_64 BarnacleBoy; What?! [The scene cuts to the front door of the pineapple. The door opens.] [While he is pushing Mermaid Man out the door.] I come down in my underwear to open a jar of mayonnaise?! [He stops and the two turn around.] ;s1e41_65 SpongeBob;But...;s1e41_66 BarnacleBoy; But nothing! We can't go around socializing. We have to be prepared for, uh, emergencies. ;s1e41_67 MermaidMan; Barnacle Boy, think about it. Emergencies don't come around as often as they used to. ;s1e41_68 BarnacleBoy; Alright, okay. You can blow the conch every once in a while. Just give us [He takes the jar of mayo.] something to do when we [while he struggles to open the jar of mayo.] show up. ;s1e41_69 MermaidMan; [While jumping in the air.] Yay! ;s1e41_70 {system}; [The bubble transition goes to the Shady Shoals Rest Home cafeteria, where Barnacle Boy is eating soup. The conch signal blows as he grabs a spoon full of soup. He blows on it and Mermaid Man grabs Barnacle Boy's arm, while running, which causes him to drop the spoon.] ;s1e41_71 MermaidMan;Danger!;s1e41_72 {system}; [At SpongeBob's house, in his bathroom, Mermaid Man fixes SpongeBob's sink and Barnacle boy unclogs SpongeBob's shower drain. SpongeBob is shown blowing the conch signal. It then cuts to the library, where Mermaid Man is on a ladder, holding a book, and Mermaid Man is holding Mermaid Man's butt, so that he doesn't fall. SpongeBob is shown blowing the conch signal. It cuts to the living room, where he is in a barber's chair, reading the newspaper, Mermaid Man is shining SpongeBob's shoes, and Barnacle Boy is giving him a head massage. It then cuts to SpongeBob, at night, on his house, using the conch signal. It then cuts to SpongeBob, in bed, next to a teddy bear. Mermaid Man is reading a book and Barnacle Boy is holding milk and plate of cookies. It cuts to SpongeBob blowing the conch signal three different times. On the last time, Barnacle Boy takes it out of SpongeBob's mouth.] ;s1e41_73 BarnacleBoy; Alright, that's it! Gimme that! You're running us ragged. ;s1e41_74 MermaidMan; [While crawling on the walkway of SpongeBob's house.] Must... must answer clarion call! ;s1e41_75 {system}; [Mermaid Man collapses.] ;s1e41_76 BarnacleBoy; We're exhausted! ;s1e41_77 SpongeBob; [While tearing up] I'm sorry, Barnacle Boy. I didn't mean it. I... just wanted to spend time with you. You're my heroes! ;s1e41_78 {system}; [SpongeBob starts crying.] ;s1e41_79 BarnacleBoy; [While SpongeBob is crying] It's too late for that, Mr. Contest Winner. I'm gonna destroy this thing with my... sulfur vision! [He tries to use his sulfur vision to destroy the conch, but is unsuccessful. He tries again, but he still doesn't succeed.] I'll destroy it when I get back to the [Puts the conch in his pocket], uh, Mermalair. Uh, and as for you... ;s1e41_80 MermaidMan; Barnacle Boy, [While getting up.] don't squash his enthusiasm. After all, he could be the hero of tomorrow. Or the villain. Besides, I remember another [He takes out a picture.] young [The image shows Barnacle Boy as a kid.] whipper-snapper, who wanted to be a super-hero. ;s1e41_81 {system}; [Mermaid Man chuckles.] ;s1e41_82 BarnacleBoy; You don't even remember breakfast, you old coot. ;s1e41_83 {system}; [Mermaid Man walks up to SpongeBob, still crying] ;s1e41_84 MermaidMan; Maybe the conch signal is too much responsibility. [SpongeBob stops crying.] But how would you like to spend the rest of the afternoon on patrol? ;s1e41_85 BarnacleBoy;What?;s1e41_86 MermaidMan; [While he and SpongeBob are running to the Invisible Boatmobile to jail] To the Invisible Boatmobile! [Barnacle Boy becomes angry] ;s1e41_87 {system}; [The scene fades to later. Barnacle Boy is still angry] ;s1e41_88 SpongeBob;Oh...;s1e41_89 MermaidMan; Jingle bells, Mermaid Man smells, [Mermaid Man, Barnacle Boy, and SpongeBob, who is now wearing a superhero outfit, is shown in the Invisible Boatmobile, which is driving down the street.] Barnacle Boy laid an egg, The Invisible Boatmobile, [The Invisible Boatmobile stops at a red light.] lost a wheel and... ;s1e41_90 SpongeBob; Hey, [moves to the driver's seat] can I drive? ;s1e41_91 BarnacleBoy; Drive? What do you know about driving the Invisible Boatmobile? ;s1e41_92 SpongeBob; Tons! Like the windshield wipers are right here. [pushes a button] ;s1e41_93 BarnacleBoy; Don't touch that button, that's the...! [Invisible Boatmobile folds into an origami swan] ...Origami button. ;s1e41_94 MermaidMan; [He and Barnacle Boy are scouting on top of a building] When you patrol in the city, you'll always have to be vigilant. On your toes. [Turn to the right side of the building] Constantly alert. Always expect the unexpected. [Turn back to the left of the building. SpongeBob is on the edge] ;s1e41_95 SpongeBob; Hey! [scares Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy and they fall off the building, screaming. SpongeBob goes to the rooftop] I've got the doughnuts! ;s1e41_96 MermaidMan; ...and Barnacle Boy laid an egg. Hey-hey! ;s1e41_97 MermaidMan; Oh, that fellow over there used to be the Atomic Flounder. I know he doesn't look like much, but he could go back to crime... [snaps fingers] ...just like that. [he and Barnacle Boy laugh] ;s1e41_98 AtomicFlounder; [SpongeBob pins the Atomic Flounder on the ground] Help! Help! Help! Somebody there? ;s1e41_99 SpongeBob; You're under arrest, Atomic Flounder. ;s1e41_100 MermaidMan; Stop, kid. Stop! Let him go. ;s1e41_101 SpongeBob; But you said he could snap... [snaps fingers] ...just like that. ;s1e41_102 AtomicFlounder; What?! Get off of me! [pushes SpongeBob away] If I weren't retired, I'd, I'd... [roars and breathes radiation on Barnacle Boy's face. Barnacle Boy's head glows red and explodes into a miniature mushroom cloud, leaving it charred] ...do that. [leaves] Out of my way, punk! ;s1e41_103 {system}; [At The Diner] ;s1e41_104 SpongeBob; I can't believe it: I rode in the Invisible Boatmobile, met a villain, and learned to treat third-degree burns, all in one day. So, what are we going to do tomorrow. ;s1e41_105 BarnacleBoy; Uh, uh, say, kid, why don't you take this nickel and go up there and see if our theme song in on the jukebox? ;s1e41_106 SpongeBob; Okay. [goes to the jukebox] ;s1e41_107 MermaidMan; You know, for a pain in the neck, he's a pretty nice kid. ;s1e41_108 BarnacleBoy; Let's ditch him. ;s1e41_109 MermaidMan; I'm right behind you. ;s1e41_110 SpongeBob; [looking through the selection of songs] It doesn't seem to be here. ;s1e41_111 BarnacleBoy; Oh, it's there, all right. ;s1e41_112 MermaidMan; Keep looking. Diligence. Diligence. ;s1e41_113 SpongeBob; Aye, aye, sir. [looks again] ;s1e41_114 BarnacleBoy;Dagnabbit.;s1e41_115 MermaidMan; What's the matter? ;s1e41_116 SpongeBob; Aw, that's the 15th time I've looked. [deep voice] But I can't let my heroes down. [looks again] ;s1e41_117 MermaidMan; Boatmobile, where are you? [tries to find it] Barnacle Boy, I found it. [turns engine on and Barnacle Boy gets burned again] ;s1e41_118 DirtyBubble; [laughs] Still getting burned on that tail pipe, huh, Barnacle Boy? [laughs] ;s1e41_119 BarnacleBoy; It's the Dirty Bubble! ;s1e41_120 MermaidMan; In all his dirty roundness! [screams] ;s1e41_121 BarnacleBoy; Oh, no! ;s1e41_122 SpongeBob; [runs outside] I found it and it's the special dance mix! ;s1e41_123 BarnacleBoy; [trapped inside the Dirty Bubble] Help! Help! Help! ;s1e41_124 SpongeBob; Holy Krabby Patties! Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy's arch nemesis: The Dirty Bubble! I can't believe it! ;s1e41_125 DirtyBubble; [laughs] You cannot save them, Sponge of Mystery! They are trapped by my awesome surface tension! [laughs] ;s1e41_126 SpongeBob; You don't understand! You're my most favorite super villain. Can I get your autograph? [gets out a notepad and a sharp pencil as the point on the pencil glints] ;s1e41_127 DirtyBubble; Oh, no! [Runs away as SpongeBob walks to him while pointing the pencil at him] Oh, no, you fool, stay back! The point. Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Watch the point now! [The Dirty Bubble screams when SpongeBob pops the Dirty Bubble with the pencil] ;s1e41_128 MermaidMan; Aha! You saved us, son. ;s1e41_129 BarnacleBoy; Yeah, you're a hero. ;s1e41_130 SpongeBob; I am? ;s1e41_131 MermaidMan; Are you up for another ride in the Invisible Boatmobile? ;s1e41_132 SpongeBob;Oh...;s1e41_133 MermaidMan; Jingle bells, Mermaid Man smells, Barnacle Boy laid an egg... ;s1e41_134 All; The Dirty Bubble popped and Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy and SpongeBob got away! Hooray! ;s1e41_135 BarnacleBoy; Watch out! [Short Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy stinger plays] ;s1e41_136