# Talk:Tommy James (American football)

This review is transcluded from Talk:Tommy James (American football)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 18:11, 19 July 2013 (UTC)
Just want to say thanks for picking this up and that I'm here and ready to address any issues and answer any queries. --Batard0 (talk) 18:30, 19 July 2013 (UTC)
Comments

"1950s. James was born" -> "1950s. He was born"
Done. --Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
" he starred as a back" not sure on the neutrality of saying "starred".
Changed to "played." --Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
"he followed Brown to Ohio State, where he played as" second "he", strictly speaking it's unclear whether it's James or Brown you're referring to here.
Rephrased to eliminate the second use of "he." --Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
"He went to grammar" He attended?
Fixed.--Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
Consider linking grammar school.
Linked.--Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
Consider linking touchdown.  I know it's obvious to you but it's not obvious to all international readers.
Linked.--Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
I would expect win-loss to use an en-dash, just like the record itself does!
Done.--Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
"James had an interception" do you mean he "made" one or "suffered" one?
Made one. Changed. --Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
"as he got older" not keen on this phrase, perhaps "as an older player" or something?
Put in "later in his career". --Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
What does "on waivers" mean?
It means you allow other teams to employ him on the same contractual terms as you signed him on. If a player "clears waivers" it means no team wanted to pick up the contract, and at that point he's free to make a new contract with any team. I linked it and briefly described it. --Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
Ref 17 title could use an en-dash.
Fixed. --Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)
The Rambling Man (talk) 17:17, 21 July 2013 (UTC)


### GA criteria
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written.
a (prose):  b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): 
Just the comments above to be addressed regarding prose improvement.
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section):  b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR): 

It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects):  b (focused): 

It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias: 

It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.: 

It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):  b (appropriate use with suitable captions): 

Overall:
Pass/Fail: 

A few minor prose issues, otherwise no problems here, I'll place it on hold for a week until I'm notified that the article has been updated.  Cheers.  The Rambling Man (talk) 17:17, 21 July 2013 (UTC)

All issues above are addressed, I believe, but I'm happy to make any additional adjustments. Thanks, and this certainly makes the article better. --Batard0 (talk) 19:04, 21 July 2013 (UTC)