# Talk:Victorian Age: Vampire

I suggest that this article be deleted.  Comments?  TheSeven 16:29, 29 January 2007 (UTC)

Legitimate article, needs love and attention.Darker Dreams 07:51, 16 February 2007 (UTC)

Excellent work! When I first saw this article, it looked like this. :) BOZ (talk) 16:08, 8 October 2020 (UTC)

Thank you! As you know, I've been cataloguing WoD coverage in RSs for a while, and thought that this would be an "easy article" to begin working on due to its smaller scope compared to something like Werewolf: The Apocalypse.--AlexandraIDV 16:12, 8 October 2020 (UTC)
Kudos on this, and on your WoD work in general. :) BOZ (talk) 16:16, 8 October 2020 (UTC)

This review is transcluded from Talk:Victorian Age: Vampire/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: The Most Comfortable Chair (talk · contribs) 05:49, 14 October 2020 (UTC)
Hello. I will have the review shortly. Thank you. — The Most Comfortable Chair 05:49, 14 October 2020 (UTC)


### Lead
Text only character size of the article is "7631", as of this edit. — The lead should be condensed into two paragraphs per MOS:LEADLENGTH.
Very well.--AlexandraIDV 23:27, 19 October 2020 (UTC)


### Overview
"The Victorian Age: Vampire rulebook does not contain complete rules, and as such the game requires another rulebook from the series, such as Vampire: The Masquerade Revised Edition or Dark Ages: Vampire, to be played." — "to be played" hangs out a little awkwardly at the end. Consider removing it or writing it earlier, such as → "The Victorian Age: Vampire rulebook does not contain complete rules, and as such the game requires another rulebook from the series to be played, such as Vampire: The Masquerade Revised Edition or Dark Ages: Vampire."
Cheers, this subtle change does make a big difference.--AlexandraIDV 23:27, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
"While the series until then had largely been written from an American perspective," → "While the series had largely been written from an American perspective until then," — Reads a bit more smoothly.
Done.--AlexandraIDV 23:27, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
"form of 2003's Kindred of the Ebony Kingdom." → "form of Kindred of the Ebony Kingdom in 2003." — To make it sound more formal.
Done.--AlexandraIDV 23:27, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
"social reform" — If there are any particular issues it focuses on, mention that instead.
The source only says "social reform - both violent and diplomatic". I have incorporated this bit, but it doesn't mention specific issues.--AlexandraIDV 23:27, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
"supported it with two supplements." — Could their contents be mentioned briefly?
They are mentioned in the table just below this paragraph - I feel it would be a little much to have it repeated that soon.--AlexandraIDV 23:27, 19 October 2020 (UTC)


### Related media
"A trilogy of novelizations was written by Philippe Boulle, consisting of 2002's A Morbid Initiation and 2003's The Madness of Priests and The Wounded King." → "A trilogy of novelizations was written by Philippe Boulle, consisting of A Morbid Initiation (2002), The Madness of Priests and The Wounded King (2003)." or "A trilogy of novelizations was written by Philippe Boulle, consisting of A Morbid Initiation in 2002, and The Madness of Priests and The Wounded King in 2003."
Done.--AlexandraIDV 23:27, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
That should be all for now. It is compact and written well, and it should pass. Thank you. — The Most Comfortable Chair 18:38, 19 October 2020 (UTC)

@The Most Comfortable Chair: Thank you for the review! I have implemented your suggestions, with one exception, which I left a comment for above.--AlexandraIDV 23:29, 19 October 2020 (UTC)


### Final
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written.
a (prose, spelling, and grammar):  b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): 

It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section):  b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):  d (copyvio and plagiarism): 

It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects):  b (focused): 

It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias: 

It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.: 

It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):  b (appropriate use with suitable captions): 

Overall:
Pass/Fail: 
The article is concise and flows really well. It is as interesting as the game, and meets the criteria. Thank you for all everyone's efforts! — The Most Comfortable Chair 03:30, 20 October 2020 (UTC)