# Talk:SMS Aspern

This review is transcluded from Talk:SMS Aspern/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: CPA-5 (talk · contribs) 16:29, 24 January 2020 (UTC)

Claim this one. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 16:29, 24 January 2020 (UTC)

I don't really have much time so I'll do this one as fast as possible. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 21:23, 27 January 2020 (UTC)
Works for me - thanks for taking it on. Parsecboy (talk) 21:28, 27 January 2020 (UTC)
Lead

SMS Aspern was the second of three Zenta-class cruisers --> "SMS Aspern was the second of the three Zenta-class cruisers"
Done
She carried a main battery of eight 12 cm (4.7 in) guns She? You mean they?
Yup
Link I Cruiser Division and pipe Italy to the Kingdom of Italy.
Done
I'll stop here, for now, 'cause of my birthday today (had to spend my day with my family). I'll leave it here alone and continue it tomorrow. ;) Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 20:18, 29 January 2020 (UTC)

Happy Birthday! Now go have fun and have a big piece of cake :) Parsecboy (talk) 21:16, 29 January 2020 (UTC)
Design

Link both tons.
Metric vs Imperial as primary units?
Zenta class were 96 m (315 ft 0 in) long at the waterline Inch isn't needed.
Aspern displaced 2,313 long tons (2,350 t) normally Unlink both tons here.
a pair of Salvator-Dormus M1893 8 mm (0.31 in) machine guns Is it possible to avoid two separate numbers next to each other?
 them a range of 3,800 nautical miles (7,000 km; 4,400 mi) Unlink the common units. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 19:10, 6 February 2020 (UTC)
All done.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 19:32, 6 February 2020 (UTC)
Service history

"Kreuzer B", also designated Ersatz (replacement) Helgoland What was Helgoland?
Her completed hull was launched on 3 May 1899. The ship was nearly complete by April 1900 I would say "Her completed hull was launched on 3 May 1899 and was nearly complete by April 1900" how sounds that in your ear?
Another thing here in the same sentence, by April 1900 when she began her sea trials, which lasted into early May I believe we missed "her" here.
I deleted the whole sea trials bit as it interrupts the flow.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
She was named for the Battle of Aspern-Essling of 1809 You mean "She was named after the Battle of Aspern-Essling of 1809"?
Both phrasings are acceptable in English.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
Deployments to China, 1900–1904

By this time, the Boxer Rebellion had broken out in Qing China, prompting Austria-Hungary to send Aspern along with the protected cruiser Kaiserin Elisabeth to strengthen the forces of the Eight-Nation Alliance that had assembled to defeat the rebellion. This is a long sentence.
Not seeing an easy way to break it in half.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
A comma or a couple of them can help to reduce the attention of this long sentence.
I'mma gonna let Parsec handle this one as I like it as is.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 19:36, 13 February 2020 (UTC)
I suppose we could offset "along with the protected cruiser Kaiserin Elisabeth" with commas, but I don't know that it's necessary or much of an improvement. Parsecboy (talk) 20:06, 13 February 2020 (UTC)
No worries, it doesn't sound good if there are some commas. Cheers.
Aspern then steamed north to Hong Kong, where she spent several days re-coaling I know this about Aspern's article but maybe we should explain here that they split and what happened to Kaiserin Elisabeth? Another thing pipe Hong Kong to British Hong Kong.
Fixed the link. Don't really think that her voyage is all that relevant.@Parsecboy:--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
Okay but I still believe the words "they split up" are needed to explain that Kaiserin Elisabeth didn't follow Aspern at that moment.
Lemme see what happened to the other ship.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 19:26, 18 February 2020 (UTC)
Freivogel doesn't cover Kaiserin Elisabeth in detail. What does Sieche say, @Parsecboy:?
Could you please have a look Parsecboy? This is the only comment who should be addressed before I can pass it. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 21:17, 21 February 2020 (UTC)
@CPA-5: - I've added a bit on where Kaiserin Elisabeth went. Parsecboy (talk) 10:01, 25 February 2020 (UTC)
While Aspern was making her way into Shanghai harbor on 8 February 1901 Isn't it Shanghai's harbour? Or is this the official term?
AmEng is harbor; BritEng is harbour.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
Well yes, but that's not really my point here. My point here is if I read the Shanghai part of this sentence, then I wanna say an extra "s". My question here is do we need the extra "s"? PS the British harbour is because I write in British but next time I will make it a quate to avoiding these kinds of misunderstandings.
Ah, I misunderstood. Both are OK in English although Shanghai harbor should be capitalized as it's a proper noun, Shanghai's harbor doesn't need it because it's not a proper name.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 19:36, 13 February 2020 (UTC)
The ship was recalled to Europe at the beginning of 1902. She arrived in Hong Kong on 6 January, after which Aspern sailed south to Singapore I'd say "At the beginning of 1902 the ship was recalled to Europe and arrived in Hong Kong on 6 January, after which Aspern sailed south to Singapore"? Also another thing here, why was she recalled?
Good idea. Probably to relieve her crew, but not covered in my sources.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
She continued on to Colombo, before passing through the Suez Canal at the beginning of March --> "She continued on to Colombo, before passing through the Suez Canal again, at the beginning of March"?
Adding "again" breaks the flow of the sentence.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
The ship was then ordered to return to Chinese waters for another tour abroad Why exactly?
Not covered in my sources, but the European powers liked to keep warships in Chinese waters for prestige and to protect their citizens in case of trouble.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
Service in home waters, 1904–1914

On 17 March 1907, Aspern was recommissioned for a cruise abroad in company with the armored cruiser Sankt Georg to the United States to take part in the Jamestown Exposition, marking the 300th anniversary of the Jamestown colony, the first permanent English settlement in the Americas. I wouldn't say this is a random topic but I am wondering why Austria-Hungary cares about the 300th anniversary of the Jamestown colony especially before a major war would start in the coming years?
Nobody could predict the future a dozen years ahead of time. Participating is fleet reviews and the like is a prestige thing.
Well yes but, I was just wondering did they visited because there a lot of Austrians and Hungarians in Jamestown?
No, they probably did it because not to do so would have been an admission that they weren't as important as the nations that did contribute ships.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 19:26, 18 February 2020 (UTC)
They stopped in the Azores from 25 to 27 June and then in Algiers, French Algeria --> "They stopped in the Azores, Portugal from 25 to 27 June and then in Algiers, French Algeria"
which was sent to the Ottoman Empire from 15 May to 15 August to protect Austro-Hungarian interests during a period of unrest in the country Where did she protect Austro-Hungarian interests, because it's 1912 and the Ottomans were dealing with Italy too?
Not covered in my sources.
an international fleet was composed to blockade Montenegro Pipe Montenegro to the Kingdom of Montenegro.
What was her role in the Second Balkan War?
Good point. Added.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:30, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
World War I

Link the Fasana Channel.
Link the Cattaro Bay in the body.
with the British cruiser HMS Liverpool, the Italian cruiser Nino Bixio, and several destroyers and torpedo boats Pipe Italian to the Kingdom of Italy and from which country were the destroyers and torpedo boats?
I'd have to say it's a great article. The rest like the infobox, images and sources would be done tomorrow because you guessed it, I'm back and I'm still waiting for my cake. :/ Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 17:11, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
Images

"Aspern in Trieste early in her career, c. 1900" Needs a circa template.
"Aspern, c. 1912" Same as above.
Not one that I'm used to using
Infobox

No "screw propellers" in the body?
"Range" doesn't match with the body?
Good catch. Read the description section again, they're all there.
You got me here. ;)
All guns except the torpedo tubes are not included in the body?
Don't see a "Deck: 25–50 mm (1–2 in)" in the body same with "Conning tower"?
Sources

No location for Sieche 1990's book and World Cat claims it was first published in 1966?
It's a journal that began publication then
Is the next Sieche the same as the 1990 one? If so we need to add an "F." in the author's name?
Dunno, we give the names as they're published
"The Naval Policy of Austria-Hungary, 1867-1918" --> "The Naval Policy of Austria-Hungary, 1867-1918: Navalism, Industrial Development, and the Politics of Dualism"?
Damn subtitles
This is strange, Erwin F. Sieche has no citation(s)?
Odd, but see [1]
@CPA-5: I just got a book covering the ship and I need some time to add the relevant material. Can you wait another day or so? BTW, happy birthday!--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 01:34, 2 February 2020 (UTC)

@Sturmvogel 66: Take your time mate. I probably won't continue with this review until the flu goes away from me BTW thanks, mate.
@Parsecboy: Thanks mate, normally I would eat my cake at the weekend, but since I got the flu I don't think it's a great idea to eat a cake today. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 13:51, 2 February 2020 (UTC)
Sorry to hear that you're under the weather, but I'd have to agree with you that cake would be contra-indicated at the moment!--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 18:51, 2 February 2020 (UTC)
All done; review away!--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:41, 4 February 2020 (UTC)
@Sturmvogel 66: and @Parsecboy: I just finished this one can someone have a look? Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 19:39, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
Sure, gimme a few.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 20:25, 12 February 2020 (UTC)
All done.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:20, 13 February 2020 (UTC)
Hey Sturm, I replied to your responses can you please answer them? Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 19:21, 13 February 2020 (UTC)
@Sturmvogel 66: & @Parsecboy: Can someone please reply to my commonts which are not (yet) addressed? Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 18:38, 18 February 2020 (UTC)
I think that there's just one point left to address and I'll get to that later today.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 19:26, 18 February 2020 (UTC)
This one is high reliable, stable, and has no copyright issues, passing. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 16:25, 28 February 2020 (UTC)