# Talk:Paddy Moran (ice hockey)

Exhaling at them while chewing tobacco - does this mean that he spat at them? Not very clear...
65.40.115.228 (talk) 19:46, 31 July 2008 (UTC)

It's not clear; the source I used said he expectorated tobacco juice. While a synonym at Wiktionary is "spit", I think the term exhaling, (blowing bad breath towards opponents) would have made better sense, and not as confusing as "expectorate". Maxim(talk) 19:50, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
"Expectorate" is clear, if unsavory.  Saying he "exhaled" while chewing tobacco changes the meaning.  If he spat on guys to keep them away from the net, its gross, but it shouldn't be changed.  leafschik1967 (talk) 20:37, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
Fixed that. Maxim(talk) 19:45, 3 October 2008 (UTC)

Why not just sum this up as a table of statistics, it reads exactly that way anyway. It needs something more if it remains text form, any thoughts ? Ottawa4ever (talk) 20:35, 31 July 2008 (UTC)

Fixed this. Maxim(talk) 19:45, 3 October 2008 (UTC)

This review is transcluded from Talk:Paddy Moran (ice hockey)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Lead
"Moran played 16 seasons, from 1901 to 1917; except the 1909–10 season when he played for the Haileybury Comets, every season played for the Quebec Hockey Club." This doesn't make much sense. It needs rewording. Who did he play for in 1909-10? Which seasons did he play for Quebec for?
Tweaked the wording. 21:23, 5 October 2008 (UTC)
Career
Low on specific details. I know this is the career of a player who played some time ago, but do you have any more info to expand it?
I've included a stats table and I've summarized the section of his career. The reason I don't go year-by-year is because it makes for boring prose, and a statistics table conveys the same information and is easier to understand. 21:23, 5 October 2008 (UTC)
Why did he leave Quebec? Why did he rejoin them?
Maybe he was loaned or traded. I haven't found anything on that. 21:23, 5 October 2008 (UTC)
"For the first time, Quebec made the playoffs, and winning the O'Brien Trophy after finishing with the best record in the league." winning is incorrect tense. Unless you rmv the "and".
Fixed. 21:23, 5 October 2008 (UTC)
Post-retirement
"After the NHA folded after the 1916–17 season, and the Quebec taking a two-year break from competition, Moran retired." The middle clause doesn't fit in perfectly tensewise.
Fixed. 21:23, 5 October 2008 (UTC)
Overall, it's quite short. Do you have any more info to expand the article. Peanut4 (talk) 19:23, 5 October 2008 (UTC)

I think this is the most comprehensive biography of Moran there is out there; the lives of hockey players from the 1900s and 1910s weren't covered intensively. I believe that the article covers the vast majority of the facts know about Moran, covering the most important points. I personally believe there should be a line drawn between criterion 3 of GA and criterion 1b of FAs. This has no chance for FA because his personal life is poorly known, but for a GA I personally believe that it is sufficient. Maxim(talk) 21:30, 7 October 2008 (UTC)
Following advice posted on my talk page, and copied above, I feel this meets the GA criteria. It certainly meets 1, 2, 4, 5 and 6, but I was unsure about the breadth of coverage. However, if no more of Moran's career and life is known then it is the epitomy of GA candidates.
It would be particularly great to find out why Moran had that one year away from Quebec, but I'm sure if you find any more info about the player, then it will be included. My first suggestion would be to try newspapers in the Quebec area for their archives. Best of luck with any improvements you can make though.

GA review (see here for criteria)
It is reasonably well written.
a (prose):  b (MoS): 

It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references):  b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR): 

It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects):  b (focused): 

It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias: 

It is stable.
No edit wars etc.: 

It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):  b (appropriate use with suitable captions): 

Overall:
Pass/Fail: 
Peanut4 (talk) 22:01, 7 October 2008 (UTC)