# Talk:Oswald Danes

This review is transcluded from Talk:Oswald Danes/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Bladeboy1889 (talk · contribs) 17:52, 9 July 2012 (UTC)
Bladeboy1889 (talk) 17:52, 9 July 2012 (UTC)
Prose
Generally good - I've made a few copy edits but there are some sentences that I think need reviewing:

"... when death is restored he takes one of the Torchwood team's enemies out in a murder-suicide." - I don't think a murder-suicide is a proper phrase.  Can it be reworded along the lines of him sacrificing himself while killing one of the antagonists in the process?
Murder–suicide is something I've seen used in mainstream news. I'll wiki-link the term in the article.
Fair point - it's not a term I've ever heard before but if it's notable enough for it's own article... Bladeboy1889 (talk)
"...American Evangelical pundits and the Christ figure stock character." - that sounds a bit odd.  Are US evangelists referred to as pundits?  Also 'the christ figure' gives it a definite article position - a better phrase would be 'as a Christ like stock character.' perhaps?
Changed to evangelists and I've just amended the Jesus mention to say Jesus, whilst still linking to christ figure. The sources available stick to a comparison to "the" Jesus.
"Danes launches an ad hoc publicity stunt; video footage of him holding a baby girl causes Monroe's star to fall" - this is very vague and doesn't really show cause and effect.
Tried to amend this.
Much clearer - thanks. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
"...Oswald takes down the Mother..." - takes down isn't a very grammatical phrase, it needs revising.
Amended
"...some questioned the morality of featuring such a character..." - who?  This needs clarifying.
expanded
Image
It's in the grey area of fair use but no different than most on Wikipedia.  It needs a caption and alt text though.
Everything else on the GA criteria checks out.  I'll put it on hold while someone takes a look at the above elements. Bladeboy1889 (talk) 12:28, 11 July 2012 (UTC)

Is anyone going to look at the issues above - time is ticking on.  I'd rather not fail the article as it's very close to being GA - but it's heading towards a fail if no revisions are made in a reasonable time. Bladeboy1889 (talk) 08:51, 23 July 2012 (UTC)
I was on the cusp of failing this - rescued in time :)  - I'll do the "GA paperwork" now. Bladeboy1889 (talk) 11:25, 25 July 2012 (UTC)

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Hello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just modified 3 external links on Oswald Danes. Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:

Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20120222175954/http://blog.zap2it.com/frominsidethebox/2011/07/torchwood-bill-pullman-americas-sweetheart-explains-the-embarrassing-history-of-the-green-screen.html to http://blog.zap2it.com/frominsidethebox/2011/07/torchwood-bill-pullman-americas-sweetheart-explains-the-embarrassing-history-of-the-green-screen.html
Added archive https://archive.is/20120707212828/http://blogs.independent.co.uk/2011/08/11/review-of-torchwood-‘the-categories-of-life’/ to http://blogs.independent.co.uk/2011/08/11/review-of-torchwood-%E2%80%98the-categories-of-life%E2%80%99/
Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20111008202153/http://www.starz.com/originals/Torchwood/Cast/OswaldDanes to http://www.starz.com/originals/Torchwood/Cast/OswaldDanes
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