# Talk:William Meschin

This review is transcluded from Talk:William Meschin/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: David Fuchs (talk · contribs) 17:13, 31 January 2020 (UTC)
{{doing}} Look for comments before the end of the week. Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 17:13, 31 January 2020 (UTC)

Sorry for the delay. It's a short article, but I wanted to do my due diligence and had to hit the stacks for the citations.
Overall, a nice little article. As I am not a medieval scholar, most of my issues revolve around wanting a bit more context for a lay reader.

Meschin built Egremont Castle on his lands lands where?
Previous paragraph describes his lands - "In compensation, King Henry I of England gave him lands around Allerdale in Cumberland, which centred on Egremont." Ealdgyth - Talk 19:42, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
Likewise, I'd find it useful to briefly explain what the Earl of Chester is in "Early life".
I'm unclear what you're wanting to know - it's a title of nobility. I've linked it in the lead - I don't usually link in lead and article body. Ealdgyth - Talk 19:42, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
The boys were also nephews of Hugh d'Avranches, who was Earl of Chester.—I assume Hugh was previously Earl of Chester?
Clarified. Ealdgyth - Talk 19:42, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
So I'm guessing there's not really any real scholarship about his life before the First Crusade?
Heh. Middle Ages. We're lucky we have anything on some folks... Ealdgyth - Talk 19:42, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
What is Gilsland? Carlisle? Without really knowing where these are, the names are kind of meaningless. Later on your provide a little more context for where Allerdale is, which helps, but even adding stuff like "in the south of England"-type things would help orient readers spatially.
Hopefully this helps? Ealdgyth - Talk 19:42, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
Along those lines, if there's any details that would funnel into creating a map showing the region either then or rough location on modern-day England, I think that would be a useful illustration.
I do not have the capablity to make a map... Ealdgyth - Talk 19:42, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
@Ealdgyth: I added an image pulled from the county article page as illustration and context, if you think that works for giving a visual indicator. Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 15:01, 8 February 2020 (UTC)
That works for me. Ealdgyth - Talk 17:34, 8 February 2020 (UTC)
Katrina Legg argues—who is?
Clarified. Ealdgyth - Talk 19:42, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
A bit of context that confused me was why Meschin's lands were divided amongst his daughters versus inherited in part or solely by Ranulf. You end up explaining that the brother died, but I would suggest moving that line to before Skipton went to Alice so it's clear up front (and I think it flows more naturally as a chain of thought through the paragraph.)
Done. Ealdgyth - Talk 19:42, 7 February 2020 (UTC)
References: References used all seem reliable and adequately and consistently formatted.
Spot-checked statements attributed to refs 1, 5, 9, and 19, and didn't spot issues with verification or close paraphrasing.
--Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 17:21, 6 February 2020 (UTC)

Sorry for the delay - got home Tuesday from being out on the road with hubby and promptly got sick. Am feeling better today should be able to pick this back up tomorrow. Ealdgyth - Talk 18:21, 6 February 2020 (UTC)
Okay, looks good, I am passing. Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 14:50, 10 February 2020 (UTC)