# Talk:Looking Glass Girl

This review is transcluded from Talk:Looking Glass Girl/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Nominator: DaniloDaysOfOurLives (talk · contribs) 01:59, 27 May 2025 (UTC)
Reviewer: Z. Patterson (talk · contribs) 12:52, 5 July 2025 (UTC)
I will be reviewing the article. Z. Patterson (talk) 12:52, 5 July 2025 (UTC)

@DaniloDaysOfOurLives: You wrote the article well.  The article appears to have no edit-warring or original research.  It also appears to be well-illustrated and broad in coverage.  However, I have some points to address.
We generally avoid words such as "while" and "whilst" in good article nominations (GANs) and featured article candidacies (FACs).  For a checklist I use when I prepare GANs and FACs, please see User:Gog the Mild/Misc#GAN/FAC checklist. Perhaps "as" could take the place of "whilst".  The sentence, "Whilst in the coma, she dreams that she is in Wonderland", could be rewritten as "As she is in the coma, she dreams of being in Wonderland".
Are you able to find sources other than those from The Guardian to support the Premise section?
In Background and release, we do not need consecutive in-text citations for the same sources in the same paragraph.  I believe two in-text citations suffice.
For the sentence, "The book deals with the themes of friendship, love and bullying", would you mind placing the citations in order and removing the space between the citations?
There are consecutive in-text citations for the same sources in Reception.  I think we could minimise in-text citations from the same sources.
If you make the changes, I plan to pass this article as a good article.
Z. Patterson (talk) 14:13, 5 July 2025 (UTC)
@DaniloDaysOfOurLives: I placed the review on hold.  I will give you seven days to address these issues. Z. Patterson (talk) 20:16, 5 July 2025 (UTC)
@Z. Patterson: Thank you so much for your review and your kind words! It means so much :) Sorry for the lateness, I did not see that you had finished the review. I have expanded the article and added some more information and sources. Regarding your points:
1.) I removed "whilst" - I was not aware of this, thank you for telling me!
2.) I added another source to the "Premise" section. However, I was actually considering removing the sources from that section altogether as WP:PLOTSOURCE says that plot summaries do not need sources. I used those sources as they were the most detailed plot summaries of the sources
3.) I have added more information and so there are not many consecutive in-text citations anymore, but I have kept some of them as MOS:QUOTE says that quotes need sourcing at the end of their sentences, even in the lead.
4.) I have placed them in order
5.) I am reluctant to do this as the reception section includes direct quotes and the MOS says that quotes need sources at the end of the sentence, and I think it is useful for readers in general and I do not see any harm in having them
Thank you so much again for your review - please let me know if anything else needs fixing at all! :) DaniloDaysOfOurLives (talk) 09:03, 8 July 2025 (UTC)
@DaniloDaysOfOurLives: You are welcome.  I passed the article as a good article.  I commend your work. Z. Patterson (talk) 10:37, 8 July 2025 (UTC)