# Talk:Felipe Camiroaga

I would like to have a go at copy editing this article, but first you need to find a better translation for the boxed quote. This is the subject speaking for himself, the most important part of the article, and what is there at the moment is uneditable because it makes little sense. Get that right and I am happy to help with the rest. You might like to choose one of the Spanish-English translators from this page. [1] Thanks. Rumiton (talk) 19:19, 11 June 2012 (UTC)
I asked a guy listed in that page. I hope he can get back with a translation soon :-) --Diego Grez (talk) 00:37, 12 June 2012 (UTC)
Great. Thanks. Rumiton (talk) 02:04, 12 June 2012 (UTC)

This review is transcluded from Talk:Felipe Camiroaga/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Wizardman (talk · contribs) 15:55, 27 August 2012 (UTC)
This has waited far too long for a review, so I'll provide one. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 15:55, 27 August 2012 (UTC)
Here are the issues I found:

"He also acted in some TV series," in several sounds a bit better.
"the most important of its kind in America, in 2009 and 2010." cite should be added for a statement like this, also reword to in the Americas.
Noting his death in the lead may be helpful since a nice amount of the article is dedicated to it.
"moved to the Canary Islands, Spain," Canary Islands in Spain,
"in the location; his" comma instead of semicolon.
Nearly all the paragraphs in the television section start off the same way; try mixing it up a bit rather then having "In year, Camiroaga...". Same for the death section, and this is actually true for a good number of sentences in the article; it makes it repetitive.
"as camera assistant at the press department of television channel" as a camera...of the television.
"both of which were taken off the air because of polemic contents," not sure what that means; could it be reworded?
"unsuccessfully, before it" rm comma
I'll put the article on hold and will pass it when the issues are fixed. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 03:36, 29 August 2012 (UTC)

 Alright Diego Grez (talk) 18:54, 29 August 2012 (UTC)
Looks good now, article passes. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 23:50, 29 August 2012 (UTC)

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