# Talk:Ninian Edwards

This review is transcluded from Talk:Ninian Edwards/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Malleus Fatuorum 21:09, 8 July 2010 (UTC)

Lead
The lead needs to be expanded to better summarise the article. It probably ought to be about twice its present length.
I have expanded the lead but would like the revision to be reviewed. Fishal (talk) 23:31, 11 July 2010 (UTC)
Early life
The second half of the second paragraph needs to be cited.
Done. Fishal (talk) 05:45, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
Territorial governorship
"Only 34 years old at the time of his appointment, Ninian Edwards remains the youngest man ever to become Illinois' chief executive." Needs to be cited.
"... Ninian Edwards remains the youngest man ever to become Illinois' chief executive." If I'm understanding this correctly, the Illinois Territory no longer exists. So why the "remains the youngest man ever", rather than "was the youngest man ever"? Is it likely that there will be a younger man in the future?
I have changed it to "...Ninian Edwards is the youngest man ever to govern Illinois as either a state or a territory" in order to clarify its meaning.  I have cited Howard, who provides that piece of trivia, but I am not sure whether that is appropriate.  Howard's book dates to 1988 and therefore excludes Edgar, Ryan, Blagojevich, and Quinn.  It is a simple thing to see that all of them were older than 34 when they became governors, but I do not know if simple math falls under WP:OR.  As it was, I had not cited it because it seemed to be one of those "instantly verifiable" facts. Fishal (talk) 21:18, 9 July 2010 (UTC)
Simple maths isn't a problem, and certainly isn't OR. Malleus Fatuorum 21:59, 9 July 2010 (UTC)
"By awarding patronage to some, Edwards offended others, and he soon found that he and Judge Jesse B. Thomas were the leaders of rival political factions." Needs to be cited.
That sentence was inelegant and sounds like a defense of Edwards.  It now reads: "In the early territorial years, two rival factions grew up around Edwards amd Judge Jesse B. Thomas.<ref>Buck, 193.</ref>  These two factions formed Illinois' political landscape during its time as a territory and for its first several years of statehood.<ref>Howard, 24; Buck, 206.</ref>"
Much better I think. Malleus Fatuorum 21:59, 9 July 2010 (UTC)
Democratic government
The last half of the second paragraph needs to be cited.
Done. Fishal (talk) 05:45, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
Peoria War
The last half of the second paragraph needs to be cited.
Done. Fishal (talk) 05:45, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
Second and third terms
The last half of the last paragraph needs to be cited.
Done. Fishal (talk) 05:45, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
Senate career
The last half of the third paragraph needs to be cited.
Done. Fishal (talk) 05:45, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
Adminstration
The fourth paragraph needs to be cited.
Done. Fishal (talk) 05:45, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
Family
The bulleted list should be converted to prose.
Done.  Fishal (talk) 21:18, 9 July 2010 (UTC)
References
Where you are linking to external web sites, you need to give full details, including publisher and last access date.
All web links include a publisher but not an access date.  Which ones appear to be missing publisher information? Fishal (talk) 21:18, 9 July 2010 (UTC)  All Web links have been fixed and updated.  Fishal (talk) 05:08, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
This review is now on hold for up to seven days to allow time for these issues to be addressed. Malleus Fatuorum 13:37, 9 July 2010 (UTC)

You've done a nice job with the lead. I think we can close this now, congratulations. Malleus Fatuorum 12:34, 12 July 2010 (UTC)

The following sentence makes no sense (at least, not to me): 

He served as the first and only governor of the Illinois Territory, as one of the first two United States Senators from Illinois, and as the third Governor of Illinois from 1809 to 1818. 
I remember well the sesquicentennial celebrations in 1968, so that means, I think, that Illinois became a state in 1818.  So how was he the "third governor" from 1809-1818? HuskyHuskie (talk) 18:04, 17 July 2010 (UTC)

My guess is that originally the dates were tied to his being the territorial governor.  I've tried to clarify the chronology.Shsilver (talk) 19:48, 17 July 2010 (UTC)

Hello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just modified 2 external links on Ninian Edwards. Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:

Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20120314012910/http://chronicles.dickinson.edu/encyclo/e/ed_edwardsN.htm to http://chronicles.dickinson.edu/encyclo/e/ed_edwardsN.htm
Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20110607135431/http://www.cyberdriveillinois.com/publications/illinois_bluebook/history/chronology.pdf to http://www.cyberdriveillinois.com/publications/illinois_bluebook/history/chronology.pdf
When you have finished reviewing my changes, you may follow the instructions on the template below to fix any issues with the URLs.
This message was posted before February 2018. After February 2018, "External links modified" talk page sections are no longer generated or monitored by InternetArchiveBot. No special action is required regarding these talk page notices, other than regular verification using the archive tool instructions below. Editors have permission to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the RfC before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template {{source check}} (last update: 5 June 2024).

If you have discovered URLs which were erroneously considered dead by the bot, you can report them with this tool.
If you found an error with any archives or the URLs themselves, you can fix them with this tool.
Cheers.—InternetArchiveBot (Report bug) 14:55, 15 December 2017 (UTC)