# Talk:Frank Callan

This review is transcluded from Talk:Frank Callan/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Nominator: BennyOnTheLoose (talk · contribs) 01:23, 28 September 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: EnthusiastWorld37 (talk · contribs) 13:05, 28 September 2024 (UTC)
Shall review EnthusiastWorld37 (talk) 13:05, 28 September 2024 (UTC)


### Lead
"and argued that technique should be tailored to players." - techniques
"Callan was acknowledged as the leading snooker coach." - please state by whom


### Early life and career
"Callan won the Fleetwood and District Amateur Snooker Championship in 1950. It was the first time he had entered the competition." - I believe that these two sentences could be merged together by shortening and rewording the second
"receiving 21 points start in each frame," - receiving a 21-point start in
"His most notable tournament win" - how about victory?


### Coaching
The first mention of the term cue could do with being wikilinked to cue stick
"He was renowned" - attribution please
"with a players technique" - player's
I might be wrong but I believe that Commonwealth Club in the prose is the club mentioned in Blackpool Mecca. If that is the case, it can be wikilinked to there
Good spot - I found this BBC article that confirms it.
The word tables in the sentence "Callan was impressed that Davis was researching the quality of the various tables at the club before playing in a competition there" can be wikilinked to Billiard table
"and Parrot was champion in 1991." - typographical error denoted in bold
"However, a few years laterGriffiths reduced his engagement with Callan," - How many years later exactly? Do we know?
According to Griffiths' autobiography, he started working with Callan in 1985 (p.119); the book was published in 1989 and Griffiths wrote "I have not been going to see Frank quite so much in the past year or so." (p.121)
"like the ideal length" - such as
"deal length for Griffith's cue action." - Griffiths's
"After winning the UK title, Mountjoy said "Without Frank Callan, I would be nothing" - this sentence is missing a full stop
I added punctuation (after the quote mark, as there is a comma after "nothing" in the original)
"rather than tailored approach" - rather than a


### Reference
The reference with the title "Crucible champions: Every World Snooker Championship winner profiled including Alex Higgins, Ronnie O'Sullivan and Stephen Hendry" is missing the access date
That is what I found on the first pass. On hold EnthusiastWorld37 (talk) 18:32, 28 September 2024 (UTC)

Many thanks, EnthusiastWorld37. I've amended the article as per your comments above. Please et me know if anything else is needed. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 22:38, 29 September 2024 (UTC)
@BennyOnTheLoose: Am satisfied with the changes. The article can be promoted to GA status EnthusiastWorld37 (talk) 19:57, 30 September 2024 (UTC)