# Talk:Flamer (novel)

This review is transcluded from Talk:Flamer (novel)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 11:25, 3 September 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Please fill in the "n.a."s in the File:Flamer (2020 graphic novel) cover.jpg  fair use justification.  Not applicable is not a reasonable justification for any field.
 Done
"The novel is set in" It is set.
 Done
"a Boy Scouts summer camp" do we know where?
I couldn't find an exact location in any reliable source.
Link closeted.
 Done
"the last week of Aiden Navarro," like literally he's going to die?  The plot ends with "suicide ideation" so I'm not clear.
Haha, reading that sentence again, you are very much correct that it gives that impression. Rewrote it to be clearer Aiden goes back home.
" Boy Scouts summer" link here too.
 Done
"public high school" link.
 Done
""Navarro is also excited, since he has always been a good scout." not sure I understand the link between that and going to a public high school.
I've rewrote the two sentences to make it clearer he was excited about going to camp, but nervous about high school.
One sentence of the whole plot is referenced, why?
I usually reference sentences which could be challenged, usually for being interpretations of the text, which I felt was the case here. If you feel it's unnecessary, I can remove it.
"sharing about more intimate " about not necessary.
 Done
" the toxic masculinity and homophobia present in the Boy Scouts and Catholic organizations" this sounds like someone's opinion rather than encyclopedic fact.
I've rewrote so it doesn't attribute the characteristics to the institutions, since only one source says that.
"had a Catholic upbringing" leaving it late in the article to link Catholic.
Moved the wikilink to the plot section.
"bullying suffered by Aiden at home" is this his Catholic upbringing, because the plot doesn't mention any bullying at home.
I've removed the mention of his home
"and Kampung Boy" that's called The Kampung Boy.
 Done
"such as queen" no need for italics.
 Done
"in Horn Book Magazine's" it was The Horn Book Magazine before.
 Done
Don't force the references into one column.
The reflist was probably defaulting to one column due to bad wikicode from my part. Should be fixed now.
Pick a date format and stick with it, consistently.
I've changed the date of the first source, which used day-month-year, to month-day-year. All the dates should be formatted correctly, as far as I can tell.
That's all I have. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 18:17, 3 September 2021 (UTC)

@The Rambling Man: Thanks for your review! I've made the suggested alterations and a few more to address come concerns with the writing and content of the article. Isabelle 🔔 18:52, 5 September 2021 (UTC)