# Talk:Cold Visions

Is this just for reference count?  Dipthong01 (talk) 18:45, 30 April 2024 (UTC)

This review is transcluded from Talk:Cold Visions/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Nominator: Locust member (talk · contribs) 02:57, 10 December 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: CarbonLollipop (talk · contribs) 02:44, 22 January 2025 (UTC)
Hello again! I'll review this in a bit. I currently have a GAN at Afrikantis if you're interested, no pressure though  CarbonLollipop talk┊contribs 02:44, 22 January 2025 (UTC)

Thanks for taking on another one of my reviews! I actually did see your GA submission a little bit ago and was going to take a look at it soon. Locust member (talk) 03:14, 22 January 2025 (UTC)
I haven't taken a look at this article in quite some time so I will be copyediting it, I hope this is not an issue for your review. Locust member (talk) 03:34, 22 January 2025 (UTC)
That should be okay. Let me know when you're done so I can review the prose. CarbonLollipop talk┊contribs 03:36, 22 January 2025 (UTC)
Just finished, should be good to review now! Locust member (talk) 03:59, 22 January 2025 (UTC)


### Prose
#### Lead
As his 30th birthday was approaching, Bladee became anxious about ageing and the mixed reception toward his previous solo studio album Spiderr (2022). This sounds a bit awkward to me. I think "studio" can be removed at least.
On a side note, the Guardian article says "His anxiety about ageing, a serious depressive spell, and the mixed reception to his latest album, spiralled into a crisis." I feel like the "depressive spell" is more interesting and impactful to the creation of the album than the mixed reception to Spiderr. I would at least mention it in the Background section. If you wanted to include it in the lead, you could write something like As his 30th birthday was approaching, Bladee became anxious about ageing and experienced a depressive episode.
 Done sort of, I changed lead and body to "As his 30th birthday approached, Bladee experienced a depressive episode, feeling anxious about ageing and the mixed reception toward his previous solo album Spiderr" is this good?
A rap album, Cold Visions is Bladee's longest release. Infobox says cloud and rage rap.
I see you noticed I changed it back, but yeah, that was another editor.
Many critics believed that it is one of Bladee's darker works, especially when compared to his previous material. To me, the words "believed" and "thought" (especially the latter) suggest that critics thought something at one point, but no longer do. I'd write something like Compared to Bladee's previous material, critics considered it one of his darker works. But with that, I feel like "one of Bladee's darker works" already implies a comparison to his earlier releases.
Take a look at that whole second paragraph, I reworked it a bit.
Nice work
The album was promoted by a tour across North American and Europe. -> The album was promoted by a tour across North America and Europe.
 Done


#### Background and recording
During March 2024 -> In March 2024?
 Done
Though he has used guitars in his music before -> Although he had used guitars in his music before "Though" is somewhat informal
 Done
Good, but also "has" should be "had"
Bladee's first studio album not released ... This should probably be moved to Promotion and release. While he technically stopped being part of the label before Cold Visions was released, the formal announcement was made a few months later.
 Done


#### Composition
Overcite in first sentence
Would argue that it is not; it is to show that publications universally agreed on this. I removed AllMusic though since it is only implied, but the rest outright say it is just rap.
You can add the AllMusic citation back; the problem isn't that there are too many citations, it's that there are too many next to each other. So you could WP:CITEMERGE
With its 30 tracks, it is Bladee's longest album. Putting these statements next to each other has an implication that track counts determine album length. I would include the album's runtime here, something like With its 30 tracks and a runtime of 66 minutes, it is Bladee's longest album.
 Partly done the album is 64 minutes rounding up from its 63:36 runtime.
believed While not perfect, I think "believed" could almost always be replaced with "felt" in this article. Along with what I said above, I think "felt" is more appropriate for opinions.
 Done
compared to the "sublime optimism" in Crest (2022) and 333 (2020) and the "summery bounce" in Good Luck (2020) and The Fool (2021) I feel like "in" should be "on" or "of" here. While "in (a song)" or "in (an album)" are technically correct, they sound unnatural to me.
Replaced to "of", "on" does not sound right to me.
Fair
Charles Lyons-Burt from Slant Magazine thought "felt" is better here, or "said" to not be repetitive.
 Done
Anthony Fantano called it a "more distorted" and "darker" album when compared to Bladee's recent work. He also thought I think you should write "Music critic Anthony Fantano", since some people might not know who he is. Also, the "darkness" of the album was already touched on above. And again, same issue with "thought"
Not really sure what you mean by "the darkness of the album was already touched on above"; these are the sentences backing up the claim that critics thought it was a darker album, and giving their description as to why it is darker. I did the rest, though
I see, that's okay then
Same issues with redundancy in the following sentences, it might be worth writing something like Cold Visions contains darker themes and production.
 Done
The album contains seamless transitions, according to Press-Reynolds. Attribution isn't needed here since it's not an opinion, but removing it makes the sentence quite short. I also feel like this could be moved near the top of the paragraph.
 Done
Cold Visions also references Bladee's older work.
Changed to Cold Visions contains references toward Bladee's older work. to make it not as short, does this look good?
Fantano believed the sound effects and audio logos made the album sound like a "badly produced" DatPiff mixtape. -> Fantano said the sound effects and audio logos made the album sound like a "badly produced DatPiff mixtape".
 Done


#### Songs
##### Tracks 1-8
Overcite in the audio caption
 Done
in "Thriller" (1983) by Michael Jackson. "In" sounds slightly less unnatural for songs, but I'd still write "on" here.
 Not done "Vincent Price's laugh on "Thriller" " does not sound correct to me.
Also fair
"Flatline" is written about letting somebody down, and his Bladee's expressive emotional vocals shift between quiet whispers and soft cries. "Emotional" feels like more of a neutral term than "expressive" to me.
 Done
"Sad Meal" contains a harsh delivery
?
I don't remember what I was talking about, lol.
The track is also written about being at McDonald's feels abrupt. It'd be nice to say "The track's title is a reference to the McDonald's Happy Meal" but that would be original research.
Yeah, that would be nice, but like you said it is original research. I added a semicolon in front of it to connect it to the other sentence. Lemme know if this is good.
I would clarify which line is being cut off. The line being "I used to sell—" (which is in the source being cited) adds context to why the cutoff is called a "cunning redaction".
 Done


##### Tracks 9-20
On "Don't Wanna Hang Out", he Bladee
 Done
contains an appearance from the producer Whitearmor would be worth mentioning that he's part of drain gang
 Done
If you move the part about Year0001 to the release section, then Year0001 will need to be identified as his longtime label here
 Done good catch!
The track begins with a eerie synthesizers and deep bass "a" is a typo of course, did you mean to put it before "deep bass"?
Yes it was a typo; I did not intend for it to be in front of "deep bass", though I can put that there if you like?
Looking back, "a deep bass" is wrong in this context.
He also said that the following "Don't Do Drugz" does not delve on its topic for too long. I would remove this sentence, because the topic he is referring to isn't mentioned
 Done replaced with a description from KLSU.
"So Cold Interlude" gives light into the emotionally vulnerable side of Bladee. -> "So Cold Interlude" sheds light on the emotionally vulnerable side of Bladee.?
 Done


##### Tracks 21-30
unwarranted murder by the word's definition, murder is always unwarranted. I'm also not sure it should be linked
 Done
Rodriguez believed (felt or some other equivalent) that "Bad 4 Business" has "lowkey" production and has scant lyrics. I haven't seen "scant" before; according to its definition, it means "barely sufficient or adequate." That sounds like an opinion to me, so I'd put it in quotations.
 Done
Helfand described F1lthy's instrumental on the track as "fried" and says said Bladee's flow begins steady but slowly fades by the end. Inconsistent tenses. Also, the last part isn't an opinion so you could consider moving it.
 Done
Maybe link codeine to codeine or lean
 Done
Press-Reynolds says said that Bladee randomly saying "I'm back!" on the track sounds sounded
 Done
The track "PM2" critiques Year0001. This is a very short sentence, and the source says that it is only speculation by fans. You could write something like The track "PM2" sees Bladee rapping "Fucking giving these lames percentage", which some fans interpreted as a critique of Year0001.
 Done


#### Promotion and release
Later that day, Cold Visions was self-released as a surprise album under the label Trash Island. -> Later that day, Cold Visions was self-released as a surprise album under his label Trash Island.? Self-released of course implies it is his label. While I think that's okay in the lead, I would explicitly specify it here
 Done in both the lead and promotion/release
Throughout August and October 2024, Bladee embarked "embarked" basically means "begin", so I would use a different word here.
 Done used "undertook"
He embarked on the European leg of the tour throughout in December 2024.?
I feel that "in December" implies it only took place on one day. It was spread across multiple days, so therefore it was "throughout December" in my opinion.
He only embarked on it one time.
Oh yeah that is true, I changed it.


#### Critical reception
For AllMusic, Thomas believed that Bladee's way with his horrific words and worldview is captivating, although Cold Visions offers an intense and challenging atmosphere. This is confusing. I would again suggest changing "believed". I haven't checked copyvios at the time of writing this, but the source says "Bladee's way with his horrific words and worldview", so I'd put it in quotes or reword it. Or you could try my version: For AllMusic, Thomas said that Bladee's horrific wordplay worldview were captivating, and that Cold Visions offers an intense and challenging atmosphere. But then, "horrific" has a negative connotation, so maybe it should be quoted after all.
 Done I just quoted it.
Fantano believed that it could have been a great album, but felt there were too many unnecessary songs in the track list. -> something like Fantano believed that it could have been a great album if there were less unnecessary songs. But "unnecessary" is an opinion, so maybe Fantano believed that it could have been a great album if there were less songs he deemed "unnecessary".?
I more so summarized his opinion so he didn't specifically use the word "unnecessary". However I changed it to "Fantano felt that it could have been a great album if there were less songs that passed quickly without leaving an impression." more closer to what he said wthiout close paraphrasing
and the weight of existence in a dark world.. Two periods here
 Done omg..
Goldner called the album a "30-track meltdown" and contains felt it contained "some of his [Bladee's] most inventive flows yet".
 Done
Paste placed it at 97 in their list Again, "on" sounds more natural to me here.
 Done
It also appeared in an unranked list from AllMusic. Specify year-end list
 Done


#### Personnel/Release history
Link to executive production, mixing, mastering?
 Done
I failed to mention this at my review of The Fool. Per my own opinion and my interpretation of the wording at WP:RELEASEHISTORY, I don't think an album that was only released once needs a "Release history" section.
 Done removed from both


### References Notes
Just a few things I noticed during my prose review. I'll do a spot check and source review later.

Fans created a document to name every reference and interpolation on the album; not supported by ref 4
It does: Veteran drainers are combing through this album in group chats, building a master doc to catalog every interpolation and reference.
I see, not sure how I missed that
Ref 19 should be marked dead
Turns out they just changed the link, so I changed it to the new link.
Issue with The track "PM2" critiques Year0001. which I mentioned above
 Done as seen above


### Other
Scope, neutrality, and stability look good 

@CarbonLollipop: I have fixed all prose-related issues (sorry for so many of them).
Thank you, this passes 1a and 1b now. I'll review the rest of the criteria later today or tomorrow.


### Media
Cover is good 
Paranoia Intro snippet is good 
Considering the relative length of this article, I'd add another audio snippet at around Tracks 9-20 or Tracks 21-30, but I'll leave that up to you.


### References
#### Ref layout
Good, and has footnotes section 


#### Reliability
Obviously reliable 

The Guardian
Pitchfork
Stereogum
Side note, they recently published an article that goes further into detail about Cold Visions. You could use that in the future!
Slant
The Fader
Exclaim!
Consequence
Mixmag
Questionable or undocumented

laut.de
Good, is used to demonstrate a positive review 
HotNewHipHop
I've seen some discussions lately doubting the reliability of this site. Its use here is good either way. 
The Massachusetts Daily Collegian
Used for statements about the composition. Not used for critical reception, so good. 
Sputnikmusic
Written by staff 
AllMusic 
Hypebeast 
KLSU
Student newspaper, okay 
Fantano
Okay 
IndieWire
Never seen this one before, but looks good 


#### Spot check
8 Good, may not even be needed 
14 Good, maybe consider changing timestamp to 2:28 to add context to what he is saying 
18 Good, but same thing here, maybe change to 3:49? 
26 Good. On a side note, maybe link to crescendo 
27 
28
a;  Unrelated, but I noticed hint toward Bladee's departure from Bladee's longtime record label Year0001
b; 
30 
33 
36 
47 


#### Original research
Everything has a citation, minor issue with PM2 was fixed 


#### Copyvios
Issue with the AllMusic quotation was addressed
Everything else looks good! 


### Result
@Locust member: With your improvements to the prose, I'm happy to promote  this to GA. I left a few comments above based on things I noticed in my source review, but they are small fixes. CarbonLollipop talk┊contribs 22:20, 22 January 2025 (UTC)

Thanks so much! I will address your comments above; also, figures Stereogum publishes an in-depth article on the album over a month after I finished working on this. I will try to incorporate information from there into here, though! Locust member (talk) 22:50, 22 January 2025 (UTC)