# Talk:John G. Hawthorne

Thanks for the review, JoeHebda. How would you suggest improving the article further? --Usernameunique (talk) 03:49, 8 December 2019 (UTC)

@Usernameunique: - a photo for the infobox. Regards, JoeHebda (talk) 17:59, 8 December 2019 (UTC)

This review is transcluded from Talk:John G. Hawthorne/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 10:50, 2 April 2020 (UTC)

Comments

"from Harvard University.[5][1] " ref order.
Reversed.
No need to link major geographical non-ambiguous locations like Belgium.
Removed.
"From 1956 to 1953" back in time...
What's wrong with a bit of time travel? Fixed (to 1963).
Unlink Greece.
Done.
Could link visitor.
Done.
Non-breaking spaces around the ellipsis.
Done.
"As Lynn Townsend White Jr. wrote," context, who?
I don't normally add descriptions when the person is linked. If you think it's better, however, I could put "As the historian Lynn Townsend White Jr. wrote..."
I empathise but as a non-expert, it would be nicer for me to see that descriptor in the article rather than have to click through to find out who she was and why her opinion counted for anything... The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 07:43, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
Makes sense, added. —Usernameunique (talk) 17:38, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
"He was the husband of Dolores Hawthorne (née Bandini),[1][17][18]" three refs needed for this claim?
Nope, removed one.
You've mentioned that Athens is in Greece, perhaps you should note that Florence is in Italy to be consistent?
Done.
"Smith, Cyril Stanley" is overlinked.
I normally link all instances of a name in the publications section; here there are only two, which doesn't seem like too many.
Ok, it was the fact the overlinking happened in short order that made it so prominent to me.  Not a dealbreaker. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 07:43, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
Okay, if you don't mind I'll leave this one as is. —Usernameunique (talk) 17:38, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
Could add Category:People from Newcastle?
Done.
Short and sweet, like the article.  On hold for now. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 14:46, 2 April 2020 (UTC)

Thanks very much, The Rambling Man. Responses above. --Usernameunique (talk) 15:02, 2 April 2020 (UTC)
No worries.  I responded to a couple of points above, and then I think we're there. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 07:43, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
The Rambling Man, responded above. —Usernameunique (talk) 17:38, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
We're in the money.  Happy with this, so promoting.  Cheers.  (And do let me know if you have any other material up for review?)  Cheers. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 18:23, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
Thanks again, The Rambling Man. That's kind of you to ask—East Knoyle War Memorial is currently listed, although given the speed with which the military history project tackles those nominations, that's in no danger of lingering around. I'm also working to get Benty Grange hanging bowl, and maybe a few biographies, listed in the next few weeks. --Usernameunique (talk) 18:40, 3 April 2020 (UTC)