# Talk:James Duncan Graham

This review is transcluded from Talk:James Duncan Graham/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Peacemaker67 (talk · contribs) 09:40, 20 October 2018 (UTC)

This article is brief but in good shape. I have a few comments:

establish his notability in the first sentence, per MOS:FIRST. It seems to me that he is most notable for being one of the founders of the US Army Topo Corps, so I suggest a lead sentence of "Colonel James Duncan Graham (April 1, 1799 – December 28, 1865) was a founding member of the United States Army Corps of Topographical Engineers."
the rest of the lead needs a few tweaks. I suggest "A topographical engineer, he directed the re-survey of the Mason-Dixon Line, and served on the boundary commissions between the United States and Canada and between the United States and Mexico. He also supervised harbor improvements on the Great Lakes, and documented the lunar tide there." drop the references to his marriages and death, as they aren't significant enough for the lead and his date of death is already covered in the first sentence.
Done
do we know his mother's maiden name? Or how many siblings he had?
Couldn't find it, but there's some indication in non-RS that his mothers maiden name was Campbell.
do we know anything about his schooling?
No.
link Officer (armed forces) for graduated
done
perhaps rather than referring to it as the "Western Exploration" which appears to have no link, explain where it explored instead, as this will help the reader more
done
drop the comma after topographical duty
done
drop the capital S from Surveys, and link Vermont
done
suggest "Graham then worked on the survey of the Winchester and Potomac Railroad in Virginia, and then further railroad surveys in Alabama,... But you might want to divide these temporally if the one in Virginia was in 1831–1832 and the others were later
divided
per MOS:DATERANGE the full years are preferred rather than just the last two digits of the latter year
done
What did he do in the Second Seminole War? Or if that isn't available, what formation did Jesup command and what did it do? Also what rank was Jesup?
not available, added about Jesup
More to come. Peacemaker67  (click to talk to me) 10:10, 20 October 2018 (UTC)

link lieutenant colonel (United States)
Done
suggest explicitly stating that the "Survey of Boundary between Pennsylvania and Maryland" was of the Mason-Dixon Line
Done
suggest "He was then the general supervisor..."
Done
this might just be an Americanism, but suggest "on Lake Michigan, from" suggest adding "from" again later in the sentence
Done
I don't think he would have discovered that there was a lunar tide, rather documented it. No doubt the Native American people were aware of the tide for centuries.
Done
suggest "11th District, from August"
Done
why was his loyalty questioned?
Not sure. I would guess due to his southern origins, but  I can't find any indication one way or another. Yale says that " In 1861 Graham revealed his political feelings and his loyalty to his home state [Virginia]" so that might have a relation.
say where Congressional Cemetery is for the non-US reader
Done
all the sources look reliable to me, although I am not familiar with the subject
the image has an appropriate licence, but could use a caption stating what year it was taken
Added
I did a cheeky c/e, nothing too drastic, just to save time here. That's me done, placing on hold for the above to be addressed. Cheers, Peacemaker67  (click to talk to me) 06:29, 21 October 2018 (UTC)

Peacemaker67: I've responded to all your comments above. Eddie891  Talk Work  12:38, 21 October 2018 (UTC)
This article is well-written, verifiable using reliable sources, covers the subject well, is neutral and stable, contains no plagiarism, and is illustrated by an appropriately licensed image with an appropriate caption. Passing. Nice work! Peacemaker67  (click to talk to me) 23:42, 21 October 2018 (UTC)