# Talk:DeShawn Sims

This review is transcluded from Talk:DeShawn Sims/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
GA review (see here for criteria)
It is reasonably well written.
a (prose):  b (MoS): 
I feel that the grammar needs some clean-up, some sentences read a little awkwardly. For example the first paragraph of the body has 2 different sentences starting with "as a senior" and 1 long sentence which uses a who clause twice. In this sentence: , his brother Marcus Pruitt who was a 6 ft 11 in... I believe the , should be after his brothers name. I've always understood the information in between commas to be optional. If you take it out, the sentence should still make sense, in this case it doesn't. The words "As a..." are repeated a lot through this article. I'd recommend some variety. "In his sophomore year", "in the following year", "in the next season" etc. Make sure people can still easily figure out which year we're talking about, but the way its currently written feels repetitive.
I hope this is now what you want.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM)  15:23, 27 January 2009 (UTC)
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references):  b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR): 

It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects):  b (focused): 
do we have anything more on his personal life beyond his brother being shot?
This is a very young athlete who has not been extensively profiled.  There is not really that much more other than his nickname.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM)  15:24, 27 January 2009 (UTC)
Okay I just wanted too make sure there wasn't anything further that could be added here.--Crossmr (talk) 22:07, 27 January 2009 (UTC)
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias: 

It is stable.
No edit wars etc.: 

It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):  b (appropriate use with suitable captions): 
I feel like 5 images for such a short article is a bit excessive. These are basically 2 part actions shots and its probably better to choose a single image from each pair and use just that one.
In the high school section, the double stack helps fill in whitespace at high resolution screen settings.  I see below you describe whitespace as a nuisance.  Thus, the only place where I would remove one would be the college section and I don't really think two pictures is overdoing it for his college career.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM)  15:36, 27 January 2009 (UTC)
Overall:
Pass/Fail: 
I'll put this on hold for now. I also feel the giant white space in the middle of the article (1920x1200) is distracting. Is this second info box which is more notes and clarification than info box really necessary and does it need to be placed there if it is?--Crossmr (talk) 07:32, 27 January 2009 (UTC)
I am not so sure I would describe it as an infobox.  It is a recruiting summary template.  In its current form, I have no control over where it is placed horizontally.  The only thing I could do would be remove the second image.  In high resolution screen displays this would add more whitespace.  In low resolution settings even this would do nothing.
Not entirely true. You might not be able to edit the template to change it directly but you can constrain it and the images placement with an invisible table for formatting purposes. Using that you should be able to move the template and images around to minimize the whitespace. See some of the advanced examples here: Help:Table. After another pass, I think this is sufficient to be a good article, but to further improve the article the layout should definitely be improved if possible.--Crossmr (talk) 22:07, 27 January 2009 (UTC)

I do not believe for an ostensibly Black basketball player born in the United States, it is a WP:BLP violation to include such a category.  There is a bit of warring regarding this topic which was most recently addressed with this edit.--TonyTheTiger (T/C/BIO/WP:CHICAGO/WP:FOUR)  18:50, 8 January 2011 (UTC)

As I wrote on your talk page, this has been discussed ad nauseam elsewhere. Wikipedia requires that all facts, especially for WP:BLPs, must be verifiable. If you can't verify it, it should not be included. To quote WP:BLPCAT, "Category names do not carry disclaimers or modifiers, so the case for each category must be made clear by the article text and its reliable sources". It seems clear to me.--TM 19:17, 8 January 2011 (UTC)
Pedantic absurdity. :( Jweiss11 (talk) 20:47, 8 January 2011 (UTC)
Welcome to Wikipedia.--TM 20:58, 8 January 2011 (UTC)
Perhaps the best way to resolve this is to find a source that identifies Sims as an African-American?  I can't imagine that would be too hard to find. –Grondemar 19:02, 9 January 2011 (UTC)
I used to think that black Americans would inherently fall under this category given America's history and how black Americans came to this country. However, a present day black American does not automatically indicate that his ancestry can be traced to Africa. There are myriad countries not in Africa that could have been any given person's ancestry. Therefore, I think this category can only be included if a reliable source indicates it to be the case. Jrcla2 (talk) 19:06, 9 January 2011 (UTC)
Just so I'm clear, is the questioner questioning because he does not in good faith believe the assertion true?  And are people doing a check?--Epeefleche (talk) 05:59, 11 January 2011 (UTC)

It seems Sims signed with Galil Gilboa in Israel on November 1. If you can find a source, comment here (where I will be watching).--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 16:53, 26 November 2013 (UTC)

Hello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just added archive links to one external link on DeShawn Sims. Please take a moment to review my edit. If necessary, add {{cbignore}} after the link to keep me from modifying it. Alternatively, you can add {{nobots|deny=InternetArchiveBot}} to keep me off the page altogether. I made the following changes:

Added archive https://web.archive.org/20081214135248/http://www.freep.com:80/article/20081210/SPORTS06/812100407 to http://www.freep.com/article/20081210/SPORTS06/812100407
When you have finished reviewing my changes, please set the checked parameter below to true to let others know.
This message was posted before February 2018. After February 2018, "External links modified" talk page sections are no longer generated or monitored by InternetArchiveBot. No special action is required regarding these talk page notices, other than regular verification using the archive tool instructions below. Editors have permission to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the RfC before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template {{source check}} (last update: 5 June 2024).

If you have discovered URLs which were erroneously considered dead by the bot, you can report them with this tool.
If you found an error with any archives or the URLs themselves, you can fix them with this tool.
Cheers.—cyberbot IITalk to my owner:Online 09:22, 26 January 2016 (UTC)

Hello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just added archive links to 2 external links on DeShawn Sims. Please take a moment to review my edit. If necessary, add {{cbignore}} after the link to keep me from modifying it. Alternatively, you can add {{nobots|deny=InternetArchiveBot}} to keep me off the page altogether. I made the following changes:

Added archive https://web.archive.org/20090209054911/http://www.freep.com:80/article/20081222/SPORTS06/81222052/1048/SPORTS to http://www.freep.com/article/20081222/SPORTS06/81222052/1048/SPORTS
Added archive https://web.archive.org/20100628225119/http://www.freep.com:80/article/20100625/SPORTS03/100625064/DeShawn-Sims-signs-with-Celtics-Raymar-Morgan-with-Wizards to http://www.freep.com/article/20100625/SPORTS03/100625064/DeShawn-Sims-signs-with-Celtics-Raymar-Morgan-with-Wizards
When you have finished reviewing my changes, please set the checked parameter below to true to let others know.
This message was posted before February 2018. After February 2018, "External links modified" talk page sections are no longer generated or monitored by InternetArchiveBot. No special action is required regarding these talk page notices, other than regular verification using the archive tool instructions below. Editors have permission to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the RfC before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template {{source check}} (last update: 5 June 2024).

If you have discovered URLs which were erroneously considered dead by the bot, you can report them with this tool.
If you found an error with any archives or the URLs themselves, you can fix them with this tool.
Cheers.—cyberbot IITalk to my owner:Online 10:26, 24 February 2016 (UTC)

Hello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just added archive links to one external link on DeShawn Sims. Please take a moment to review my edit. If necessary, add {{cbignore}} after the link to keep me from modifying it. Alternatively, you can add {{nobots|deny=InternetArchiveBot}} to keep me off the page altogether. I made the following changes:

Added archive http://web.archive.org/web/20110608053834/http://www.freep.com/article/20100722/SPORTS06/7220465/1356/sports/DeShawn-Sims-trying-to-catch-NBAs-eye to http://www.freep.com/article/20100722/SPORTS06/7220465/1356/sports/DeShawn-Sims-trying-to-catch-NBAs-eye
When you have finished reviewing my changes, please set the checked parameter below to true or failed to let others know (documentation at {{Sourcecheck}}).
This message was posted before February 2018. After February 2018, "External links modified" talk page sections are no longer generated or monitored by InternetArchiveBot. No special action is required regarding these talk page notices, other than regular verification using the archive tool instructions below. Editors have permission to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the RfC before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template {{source check}} (last update: 5 June 2024).

If you have discovered URLs which were erroneously considered dead by the bot, you can report them with this tool.
If you found an error with any archives or the URLs themselves, you can fix them with this tool.
Cheers.—cyberbot IITalk to my owner:Online 00:07, 2 March 2016 (UTC)

Hello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just modified 6 external links on DeShawn Sims. Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:

Corrected formatting/usage for http://www.mgoblue.com/sports/m-baskbl/mtt/sims_deshawn00.html
Corrected formatting/usage for http://www.mgoblue.com/sports/m-baskbl/mtt/sims_deshawn00.html
Corrected formatting/usage for http://www.bigtennetwork.com/sports/mbasketball/story.asp?list_id=22&story_id=3385623
Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20110814050551/http://www.nba.com/dleague/news/sims_110415.html to http://www.nba.com/dleague/news/sims_110415.html
Corrected formatting/usage for http://www.basket.co.il/TeamPage.asp?TeamId=879&cYear=2014&lang=en
Corrected formatting/usage for http://www.mgoblue.com/sports/m-baskbl/mtt/sims_deshawn00.html
When you have finished reviewing my changes, you may follow the instructions on the template below to fix any issues with the URLs.
This message was posted before February 2018. After February 2018, "External links modified" talk page sections are no longer generated or monitored by InternetArchiveBot. No special action is required regarding these talk page notices, other than regular verification using the archive tool instructions below. Editors have permission to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the RfC before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template {{source check}} (last update: 5 June 2024).

If you have discovered URLs which were erroneously considered dead by the bot, you can report them with this tool.
If you found an error with any archives or the URLs themselves, you can fix them with this tool.
Cheers.—InternetArchiveBot (Report bug) 00:02, 7 September 2017 (UTC)