# Talk:House Party (Super Junior song)

This review is transcluded from Talk:House Party (Super Junior song)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 13:19, 26 May 2022 (UTC)

I will start this review soon, though it might take a few days. --K. Peake 13:19, 26 May 2022 (UTC)


### Infobox and lead
Change to disco-pop in the infobox instead of listing them as two separate genres, for consistency with the body and original article
fixed
Remove trap since the mention of it constitutes as elements only
removed
WP:OVERLINK of Yoo Young-jin under lyricist(s)
unlinked
"boy band Super Junior. It is the second track on their" → "boy band Super Junior for their" because the track number is not notable when this was released as a single
fixed
"Christian Fast, Didrik Thott and Sebastian Thott." → "Christian Fast, and Didrik and Sebastian Thott." per MOS:SURNAME, also this should be the sentence before the release one
sentence fixed and moved
"on March 16, 2021 by" → "on March 16, 2021, by" and why is Dreamus not mentioned with the other labels?
sentence fixed. Dreamus is a distributing label, I am not sure whether to include it or not but I've added it to the sentence
Mention that the release followed a teaser and why the song was chosen by the band
Teaser mentioned. I've tried to add the reasoning but it just doesn't flow well in the paragraph. Should I directly lift the line from the article such as "It was selected as the title track because the band wanted those who are feeling tired or depressed to be able to listen to bright and enjoyable music.", or should it be something like "The band selected the song for its bright and enjoyable music and dedicated it to those who are feeling tired or depressed.", or something else altogether? Lulusword (talk) 15:24, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
"and heavily referred to social distancing rule implemented during" → "and heavily refer to social distancing rules implemented during"
fixed
Wikilink music video and move the first mention to being the sentence directly before two further music videos in the second para
linked, sentence moved
"received positive reviews for" → "received positive reviews from critics for"
fixed
"the director-general of" → "the director-general of the" with the pipe
fixed
Add a sentence after reception mentioning the song's positions on the K-pop Hot 100 and World Digital Song Sales charts
Added
Mention any notable live performance(s) after the music video
Added
"Shindong were released on March 29, 2021 after the original video" → "Shindong, were released on March 29, 2021, after the original visual"
fixed


### Background and release
Remove nine-piece South Korean boyband introduction since this is not required nor sourced here
removed
"on November 6, 2020." → "on November 6." to avoid overusage of 2020
fixed
"Its release was further delayed to February 2021 due to issue" → "The release was further delayed to February 2021 due to issues"
fixed
"as well as setting the album's and the title track's" → "setting the album and the title track's", as this is what the postpone was
fixed
"and a dark "trap" theme." → "and a dark "trap" one." to be less repetitive
fixed
"Siwon and Donghae was released on March 3," → "Siwon, and Donghae was released on the date," with the pipe
fixed and piped accordingly
"Kyuhyun and Shindong" → "Kyuhyun, and Shindong" with the pipe
link fixed
"of Heechul, Yesung and Ryeowook" → "of Heechul, Yesung, and Ryeowook" with the pipes
link fixed
You did not add the comma here or the previous occasion --K. Peake 07:08, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
 Facepalm  I must have overlooked them as I was focusing on the link, they are fixed now! Lulusword (talk) 11:20, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
"to be the second track in" → "to be the second track on"
fixed
Pipe digitally to Music download
link added
"the band also admitted that they" → "the band also admitted they felt that"
omitted "that"
The music video info should be in promotion instead
moved paragraph
Wikilink music video
link added
"in between March 10 to" → "in between March 10 and"
fixed
Wikilink new normal to itself, no section
link fixed
"it featured conflicts between" → "it features a conflict between"
fixed
"2 am of March 25, Leeteuk, the band leader" → "2 am on March 25, 2021, the band leader Leeteuk"
fixed
The red circle part is unsourced
remove the description
"next to set." → "next to the set."
fixed
"on March 29, which were directed by Shindong, one" → "on March 29, 2021, which were directed by Shindong."
fixed


### Composition
Retitle to Composition and lyrics
Retitled
Audio sample looks good!
"Christian Fast, Sebastian Thott and Didrik Thott. " → "Christian Fast, and Sebastian and Didrik Thott." per MOS:SAMESURNAME
Fixed
Move the key sentence to being the one directly after dance song and trap infused part
Rearranged
"Musically, it is a" → "Musically, "House Party" is a"
Fixed
Remove the exciting and addictive parts, as these lack neutrality
Description removed
"It is also described" → "The song has also been described"
Sentence fixed
Remove Indonesian news outlet introduction to IDN Times
Removed
"as upbeat and contained" → "as upbeat and containing"
Fixed
"many rearrangement before" → "many rearrangements before"
Fixed
""House Party" lyrics contained hopeful message as it encouraged" → "The lyrics of "House Party" contain a hopeful message, encouraging"
Fixed
"It also heavily referenced" → "It also heavily references"
Fixed
"and obey the social distancing rules" → "and obey the rules"
Fixed
"a verse spoke about" → "one verse speaks about"
Fixed
"It also spoke about the" → "It also discusses the"
Fixed
"Heechul rapped about" → "Heechul raps about"
Fixed
"such as travelling as it is still dangerous to be outside" → "such as travelling due to the danger of being outside"
Fixed
"Eunhyuk opined that "K-pop" → "Eunhyuk opined, "K-pop" unless this is not a full sentence, then keep the prose the same but remove the full-stop from inside quotation marks per MOS:QUOTE
Fix sentence as the quote is a full sentence


### Reception and impact
MBN should not be italicised
fixed
"preserved Super Junior's unique style, it is also meaningful in the way that the song" → "preserves Super Junior's unique style, it is also meaningful due to having"
fixed
"which included the gesture of using hand sanitizer and contactless polite" → "that includes the gestures of using hand sanitizer and polite" per the source
fixed
Remove wikilink on greetings
link removed
Chosun Ilbo → The Chosun Ilbo
fixed
"its music video as it" → "its music video, as it" but move this part to the same area as the music video because it does not belong in reception section for the song
Moved sentence
Add parts from The Chosun Ilbo in reception focusing on the song instead, such as the addictive and exciting quotes
I have revised the sentence, but this is the first time I've ever encounter the word "deviance" so I am not sure if I wrote it correctly and if it should be linked to Deviance (sociology)
Do not link per MOS:LINKSTYLE on quotes, especially when it is not certain. --K. Peake 07:08, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
Noted! Lulusword (talk) 11:22, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
"Kim Soo-kyung of Korea Economic Daily said that Super Junior had released" → "Kim Soo-kyung of the Korea Economic Daily said that Super Junior released"
fixed
Remove pipe on SuJu since it is obvious the quote refers to the band per this context
link removed
"Dissecting its lyrics, he said that it is "impressive" as it managed to capture" → "Dissecting the lyrics, he said they are "impressive" due to capturing"
fixed
"writing for online magazine IZM commented that the single" → "writing for IZM, commented that the song"
fixed
Remove "of the song" at the end of the last sentence because this is implied
removed
Pipe DGWHO to Director-General of the World Health Organization
link fixed
"of World Health Organization (WHO), Dr. Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus who" → "of the World Health Organization (WHO) Dr. Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus who" with the pipe
fixed
"against COVID-19 using the song." → "against COVID-19 with the message."
fixed
"received recognition from" → "received recognition from the"
fixed
Remove overly obvious wikilink on United Arab Emirates
link removed
Remove the comma after tourism event
removed
"starting from October 15, 2021." → "from October 15, 2021 onwards." per this date having passed
fixed


### Chart performance
Retitle to Commercial performance
retitled
"on Gaon Digital Chart for the week of March 14–20, 2021 following" → "on the Gaon Digital Chart for the week of March 14–20, 2021, following"
fixed
Remove the fall to position 146 per WP:CHARTTRAJ
removed
"Meanwhile, it debuted and peaked on number eight in" → "Meanwhile, the song debuted and peaked on number eight on"
fixed
"at number 23 and 90 on" → "at numbers 23 and 90 in"
fixed
"It also reached number 27" → "The song also reached number 27"
fixed
Remove the non-notable BGM and Mobile Ringtone charts to avoid overkill
removed
"The single entered K-Pop Hot 100 chart published by Billboard and peaked on number 99 on" → "The song entered the Billboard K-pop Hot 100 at number 99 on"
fixed
"April 3, 2021.[59] It is their seventh placement in" → "April 3, 2021,[59] becoming Super Junior's seventh placement on" and add a citation for the chart history here
Removing the part about chart history entirely because for some reason billboard did not have the chart record from before the chart's first discontinuation in 2014 here so unless I cite them one by one, it is unverifiable. I will add it back if I find a reference from the korean site but that's a long shot.
That is unlucky, but hopefully you find a ref soon! --K. Peake 07:08, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
I've looked into Billboard Korea news section from last year and it only mention the song charting and nothing else about the band's charting history so that's a dead end right there, sorry. Lulusword (talk) 15:28, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
"the song debuted in" → "the song debuted on"
fixed
"on number 21 in the chart released for" → "at number 21 on the chart released for the"
fixed
"marked Super Junior's twenty seventh entry on the chart." → "marked Super Junior's 27th entry on the World Digital Song Sales chart."
fixed
""House Party" music video" → "the "House Party" music video" with the wikilink
fixed
"On The Ground" → "On the Ground" with the wikilink
fixed


### Promotion and live performance
This section can be split into two different ones especially with music video info being moved to promo; start with one titled live performances and follow with a promotion section that includes all other forms of it
Split into two sections. I'm not sure if I've done this correctly, as I'm not sure the ASMR performance is supposed to be in which section. Lulusword (talk) 13:44, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
"first revealed "House Party" on" → "first performed "House Party" on" to be specific
fixed
"televised on cable channel Mnet on March 16." → "that was televised on cable channel Mnet on March 16, 2021."
fixed
"joining SM Entertainment until the release of their 10th Korean studio album, The Renaissance." → "joining SM Entertainment until the release of The Renaissance."
fixed
Merge the first para with the following one per the short size
Paragraphs merged
Remove the "U" performance per lack of relevancy
Removed
"in the week following its release." → "shortly following its release."
fixed
"On March 18, they performed on" → "On March 18, 2021, the band performed the song on"
fixed
"They performed twice on KBS2's music show," → "Super Junior performed twice on KBS2's music show"
fixed
"Their first performance on March 19 was" → "On March 19, 2021, the band's first performance was"
fixed
For the second performance, should the "seasoned stage manners and pleasant directing" be mentioned or is my translator faulty and the source really says something non-notable?
Hmm, I think it's kinda trivial but I can add it if you think it should be mentioned. Lulusword (talk) 13:44, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
"on March 21." → "on March 21, 2021."
fixed
Remove the performances taped part since that is sourced from an article written before the song was even known about
removed
"The boy band performed the ASMR version of "House Party" in" → "Super Junior performed the ASMR version of "House Party" for"
fixed
"aired on March 18." → "aired on March 18, 2021."
fixed
Remove the I Can See Your Voice appearance due to no mention of the song
removed
Remove pipe on Donghae
removed
"Eunhyuk, Shindong and Ryeowook" → "Eunhyuk, Shindong, and Ryeowook"
fixed
"Hal Myung Soo where the host" → "Hal Myung Soo, where the host" and mention when this appearance was
fixed
"performing "House Party" and a medley of "U", "Sorry, Sorry" and" → "performing "House Party" after a medley of "U", "Sorry, Sorry", and" plus mention when this performance was
fixed
"in the variety show" → "on the variety show" and mention that they promoted the song plus when this was
fixed, date added
Pipe Amazing Saturday to DoReMi Market
fixed
"footage from the music video filming was" → "shots from the music video filming were"
fixed
"in their web variety show" → "for their web variety show" and mention when this was
fixed
"on stage at 2021" → "on stage at", as the year is mentioned later on in this sentence
fixed
"They also performed the song in" → "The band also performed the song for"
fixed
"they performed "House Party" on" → "they performed "House Party" for" and add a comma after the name of the online concert
fixed
"They performed the song in front of live audience" → "Super Junior performed the song in front of a live audience"
fixed
"on April 2, 2022, more" → "on April 2, more" to avoid overusage of the year
fixed


### Personnel
Retitle to Credits and personnel
retitled
Studios should come first, also do two sub-headings instead of any sub-sections; Recording and Personnel, respectively
rearranged and formatted accordingly
Use {{spaced ndash}} so there is the right space between credits and personnel
fixed
Pipe Siwon to Choi Si-won
fixed
Pipe Ryeowook to Kim Ryeo-wook
fixed
Pipe Kyuhyun to Cho Kyu-hyun
fixed
Pipe background vocals to Backing vocalist
fixed
Pipe recording to Sound recording and reproduction
fixed
Pipe digital editing to Digital media
fixed
Pipe mixing to Audio mixing (recorded music)
fixed


### Charts
Good


### Release history
Good


### References
Copyvio score looks incredible at 6.5%!!!
Formatting should be consistent for authors, so either write the full name out as normal or follow last by first
fixed, using full name for all refs instead
WP:OVERLINK of Naver on refs 2, 3, 6, 8, 10, 13, 15, 16, 19, 25, 27, 29, 33, 34, 41, 43, 64, 65, 70, 71, 73, 76, 77 and 83
done
Cite Rappler as publisher instead on ref 4
fixed
WP:OVERLINK of Naver on refs 5 and 48 plus cite Yonhap News Agency as publisher instead, only wikilinking on the first instance
fixed
WP:OVERLINK of Naver and Hankook Ilbo on refs 9 and 80
Link removed
Chosun Ilbo → The Chosun Ilbo on refs 11, 24 and 38 with the wikilink only on the first instance
fixed
WP:OVERLINK of Naver on ref 13 and cite iMBC as publisher instead, doing the same for ref 81 but no wikilink on iMBC
fixed
Fix MOS:CAPS issues with refs 17, 37 and 84
fixed
WP:OVERLINK of Naver on ref 18 and cite MBN as publisher instead
fixed
Fix MOS:CAPS issues with ref 21 and cite Rappler as publisher instead
fixed, also removed repeated wikilink on Rappler
Cite ABS-CBN as publisher instead on ref 22
fixed
WP:OVERLINK of Naver and MOS:CAPS issues with ref 26 and cite Star-News as publisher instead
fixed
Wikilink Rolling Stone India on ref 35 per MOS:LINK2SECT
Linked
Cite KBS as publisher instead on refs 36 and 39, only wikilinking on the first instance, and WP:OVERLINK of Naver for both
I think you meant ref 69 but I've fixed them anyway!
I probably did, but references get muddled around after certain review changes are implemented! --K. Peake 07:08, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
WP:OVERLINK of Naver and MBN on ref 42, also cite the latter as publisher
fixed
Pipe JoongAng Daily to Korea JoongAng Daily on ref 49
fixed
The National News → The National on ref 50, piping to The National (Saudi Arabia)
piped to The National (Abu Dhabi)
Silly me, got lost then... --K. Peake 07:08, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
Cite Gaon Chart as publisher instead on refs 51-58, only wikilinking on the first instance
fixed
WP:OVERLINK of Billboard on refs 60 and 61
fixed
Remove or replace ref 62 per WP:FORBES
Replaced with direct ref to Billboard
WP:OVERLINK of Naver on ref 67 and pipe Sports Dong-a to The Dong-a Ilbo
Fixed
Pipe Herald Pop to Herald Corporation on ref 68 and WP:OVERLINK of Naver
Fixed
WP:OVERLINK of Herald Pop and Naver on ref 72
Fixed
Cite CNN Indonesia as publisher instead on ref 82 with the wikilink
Fixed


### Final comments and verdict
 On hold until all of the issues are fixed; this article is a decent way off the GA criteria but I will allow a week or so! --K. Peake 09:56, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
Thank you for the review, I will look into all the suggestions as soon as I can, although edits might be slow. Lulusword (talk) 11:22, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
Lulusword Thanks for making progress quickly and I have started to respond above! --K. Peake 07:08, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
Kyle Peake I've finished addressing most of your concerns, but there are some parts that I am unsure about, and mentioned them in the comments above. Don't hesitate to remind me if there's anything else that I overlooked. Lulusword (talk) 15:32, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
 Pass now, I totally understand your reasoning for not implementing certain changes including the lead one! --K. Peake 07:08, 31 May 2022 (UTC)