# Talk:Likelike (wife of Kalanimoku)

This review is transcluded from Talk:Likelike (wife of Kalanimoku)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Premeditated Chaos (talk · contribs) 19:13, 2 July 2018 (UTC)

I'll be starting this review shortly. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 19:13, 2 July 2018 (UTC)

Remaining comments

"Prior to the promulgation..." unless Likelike abandoned or divorced Boki or Kalanimoku (which isn't clear from the text), this is irrelevant
I think it highlights the importance of the role of chiefess in their marriage and incident involves her half sister Kuwahine and her spouse showing what kind of relationship to Kalanimoku was like.KAVEBEAR (talk) 00:44, 11 July 2018 (UTC)
Frankly the rest of the paragraph starting at "Historian Samuel Kamakau and American missionary..." all the way to the end has little to do with Likelike as a person and should be included in the Kalanimoku article rather than this one
Ditto as above. It is of situational importance to Likelike as it involves her sister and husband.KAVEBEAR (talk) 00:44, 11 July 2018 (UTC)
I'm still of the opinion that this large chunk of text is not relevant and takes away from the focus of the article (literally it's about 10% of the article's word count). Likelike didn't divorce or abandon her first husband, she was "taken", so there's no reason to discuss a law that would allow her to choose to get a divorce. The bit about Kuwahine abandoning Kalanimoku and Kalanimoku's subsequent temper tantrum has nothing to do with Likelike. The article doesn't even discuss her reaction to it. Kalanimoku's credentials are a little more relevant, but there's still a bit too much detail for an article about Likelike. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 07:05, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
Removed. I also tweaked it so my speculation not found in the source was not included. KAVEBEAR (talk) 07:41, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
I made a few tweaks to this - mostly integrating Kalanimoku's info earlier into the paragraph so it explains why Boki couldn't retaliate. As long as you're cool with that, I'm satisfied with the level it's at. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 23:31, 16 July 2018 (UTC)

"...passed by Lahaina, Maui..." probably can be removed unless it's important for Likelike's story that the court stopped here
It is significant to the movement of the court since Lāhainā was the official capital at this point even though Honolulu was the commercial center.KAVEBEAR (talk) 01:57, 11 July 2018 (UTC)
The average reader probably doesn't know the significance of any of that, and it's not indicated in the article text. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 05:50, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
I think it is important to know the general mobility of the court. It certainly doesn’t hurt. KAVEBEAR (talk) 07:41, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
I've inserted a mention that Lāhainā was the capital to underscore its importance, and removed a later mention of Honolulu as capital (per Kingdom of Hawaii, Honolulu wasn't the capital until 1845, unless I'm reading it wrong). ♠PMC♠ (talk) 23:31, 16 July 2018 (UTC)
Y "overzealous" - This seems to imply that the common people went overboard from what Kalanimoku and Boki wanted, is that the case?
Overboard from what the missionaries expected of the birth of a royal. The missionaries were the one describing the Hawaiians behavior from their cultural lens.KAVEBEAR (talk) 01:57, 11 July 2018 (UTC)
I've tweaked these couple of sentences, I think they read a little smoother now. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 05:50, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
Looks good. KAVEBEAR (talk) 06:13, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
Death - paragraph 3 Sabbath
Y "The missionaries..." - what missionaries? Loomis and Bingham were back on the island of Hawaii, no?
Bingham was on Oahu and gave the sermon. There were other missionaries in Honolulu and I imagined they joined the chorus.KAVEBEAR (talk) 01:57, 11 July 2018 (UTC)
I made some tweaks here. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 05:50, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
Looks good. KAVEBEAR (talk) 06:13, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
Y Speaking of categories, are there any more this could go in? Two seems sparse compared to her husband, who has quite a few. Again not a huge deal but it's nice.
I can’t think of many. Do you have any suggestions? KAVEBEAR (talk) 01:57, 11 July 2018 (UTC)
Any of the ones on his page might be good, depending on how she qualifies - House of Kekaulike, Converts to Roman Catholicism, Converts to Roman Catholicism from pagan religions, Roman Catholic Diocese of Honolulu? Also maybe her cause of death - Firearm accident victims? ♠PMC♠ (talk) 05:50, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
She never officially converted though to either faith. The source just stated she showed interest in Protestantism. I’m not comfortable with calling her a Christian if it is not stated in the sources. KAVEBEAR (talk) 06:13, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
Yeah, see my notes above about that. I still think House of Kekaulike and Firearm accident victims might be suitable. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 07:18, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
Changed as suggested. KAVEBEAR (talk) 07:41, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
On the whole, I think the article has a strong basis but needs some work before it can pass as a Good Article. Parts of it feel unfocused, and the text is often written with the assumption that the reader knows what it's talking about when that might not be the case. 
I understand that some of the questions I'm asking above may be unanswerable based on the available reliable sources, and I won't hold that against the article - there's only so much information available, after all. But it would be remiss of me as a reviewer not to at least ask. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 20:47, 2 July 2018 (UTC)

@Premeditated Chaos: Can you look over and strike any concerns I have already addressed? And then I can work go over the remaining ones I missed or still haven’t quite gotten. It will make the rest of the stuff easier to look over since the suggestions are overwhelming me at this point. Thank you so much. I reorganized the sections a bit too. I’m not fond of the title of the second section see if it is okay with you.KAVEBEAR (talk) 01:57, 11 July 2018 (UTC)

Moved all the ticks over. There are some that you may have missed that seems resolved. And I address the remaining two. KAVEBEAR (talk) 07:42, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
Ok, basically just need you to look at what I did to the wife-taking paragraph, and the bit about Lāhainā as capital, and then I think we're good to pass. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 23:31, 16 July 2018 (UTC)
Everything looks good by me.KAVEBEAR (talk) 00:18, 17 July 2018 (UTC)
I've passed the article :) Thanks for your patience, I know I was a fairly tough reviewer. It's good work on your part! ♠PMC♠ (talk) 00:28, 17 July 2018 (UTC)