# Talk:Khalid ibn Barmak

the dates given on britannica and in the book for the mosul revolt don't correspond, there's about a 10 year difference - does anyone have an idea of how to explain? flammifertalk 17:11, 10 July 2007 (UTC)

This review is transcluded from Talk:Khalid ibn Barmak/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Ealdgyth (talk · contribs) 13:31, 23 March 2022 (UTC)
Time for another Constantine article... I'll get to this one shortly. Ealdgyth (talk) 13:31, 23 March 2022 (UTC)

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written.
a (prose, spelling, and grammar):  b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): 

It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section):  b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):  d (copyvio and plagiarism): 

It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects):  b (focused): 

It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias: 

It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.: 

It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):  b (appropriate use with suitable captions): 

Overall:
Pass/Fail: 

Lead:
"became the foster-brother of the future Harun al-Rashid," future WHAT?
Added
Origin:
link for "Balkh oasis"?
There exists no article, and I am not sure one will ever exist, it would be covered in the article on Balkh.
short quickie definition for "became a mawlā of the"?
the shortest would be 'non-Arab convert to Islam associated with an Arab tribe', which isn't very short. Have added only 'client', which isn't very accurate, but gives enough context.
Abbasid revolution:
"Soon after, both" soon after what though?
Have tried to clarify. The dates are unclear here, but if they came to the court in ca. 725, and Barmak went to Gurgan in ca. 725/6, they did not stay very long.
Okay, it's odd to say that Barmak disappears from the record and then the next sentence be that Barmak arranged a marriage. Suggest flipping these sentences.
Indeed, done.
Under al-Saffah:
Shouldn't it be "favour of Caliph al-Saffah "?
Fixed
"Shortly after he reportedly he assumed the supervision of all fiscal departments" something's garbled here and I can't fix it ...
Fixed
"the Caliph's son" but "relationship with the caliph was very close"?
Fixed
Under al-Mansur:
"According to a well-known, but likely fabricated, he persuaded" something's missing here?
Fixed
what was the "Sassanid-era Taq Kasra" - a building? Statue? something else?
Clarified
I randomly googled three phrases and only turned up Wikipedia mirrors. Earwig's tool shows no sign of copyright violation.
I've put the article on hold for seven days to allow folks to address the issues I've brought up. Feel free to contact me on my talk page, or here with any concerns, and let me know one of those places when the issues have been addressed. If I may suggest that you strike out, check mark, or otherwise mark the items I've detailed, that will make it possible for me to see what's been addressed, and you can keep track of what's been done and what still needs to be worked on. Ealdgyth (talk) 14:32, 23 March 2022 (UTC)
@Cplakidas: ... any progress? Ealdgyth (talk) 13:57, 26 March 2022 (UTC)
Hi Ealdgyth, was extremely busy IRL, will deal with this today or over the following few days. Constantine   ✍  14:03, 27 March 2022 (UTC)
Hi Ealdgyth, have endeavoured to address all issues above. Please have a look. Cheers, Constantine   ✍  11:19, 1 April 2022 (UTC)
Looks good! Passing this now. Ealdgyth (talk) 13:17, 1 April 2022 (UTC)