# Talk:1928 World Snooker Championship

This review is transcluded from Talk:1928 World Snooker Championship/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 08:14, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
Will review MWright96 (talk) 08:14, 14 June 2021 (UTC)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose):  b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): 
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section):  b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR): 

It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects):  b (focused): 

It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias: 

It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.: 

It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):  b (appropriate use with suitable captions): 

Overall:
Pass/Fail: 


### Lead
"with three of the other matches played there, and one each played in Leamington Spa and Nottingham." - repetition of "played"
Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:25, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"Davis had won the professional billiards title earlier in May, and became the first person to hold both the professional snooker titles consecutively," - repetition of "title(s)"
Amended - to "Davis had won the professional billiards championship earlier in May, and became the first person to hold the professional titles in billiards and snooker titles concurrently" BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:25, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"compiled by Alec Mann in the third frame of his match against Albert Cope." - please state which round this was
Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:25, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
Wikilink the term frame to the relevant article
Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:25, 14 June 2021 (UTC)


### Background
"Entry fees would be used to provide prize money for the finalists, with 60% going to the champion." - should be per cent per MOS:PERCENT
"The venue for the semi-finals and final was to be Camkin's Hall, Birmingham, with those matches supervised by the Midland Counties Billiard Association, and the players concerned would be left to arrange the venues for earlier rounds." - repetition of "venue(s)"
Both done. (Changed the second instance of "venue" to "location.") BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:29, 14 June 2021 (UTC)


### Summary
The term interval will be better off wikilinked to the correct article
I'm a bit stuck for a target here. It doesn't appear in the Cue Sports Glossary (nor does "mid-session break"); none of the options at Interval seem right, and nor does Intermission (after looking at that article). BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:47, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"and added the almost-50-minute-long 22nd frame."  - the hyphens in bold are not needed
Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:47, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"From 5-9," - dash should be replaced by an en dash per MOS:DASH
Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:47, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"but Lawrence progressed by securing the first three frames on the final day"" - which round did Lawrence progress to?
Added "to the final against Davis"
Wikilink professional English billiards championship to the relevant article
Linked. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:47, 14 June 2021 (UTC)


### Final
"Lawrence and Davis shared the frames in the afternoon session for 2–2," - the opening four frames
Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:12, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
Wikilink potting to the relevant article only on the first mention
Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:12, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"termed a "woefully weak shot" allowed Davis a chance." - please clarify at the end of this sentence
Amended to "a 'woefully weak shot' when he was attempting to pot the blue ball failed. Directly after this, Davis made a break of 18."
"Lawrence was 26 behind after all the red balls had been potted," - 26 points
Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:12, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"Davis became the first player to win the professional billiards and snooker titles" - claim both the
Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:12, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"in the same season.[24]The highest break" - a space is missing between the reference and the word "The"
Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:12, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
"The highest break of the final was a 44 by Davis on the third evening." - in which frame was the break of 44 made?
Changed source to one that includes this info; amended text to "The highest break of the final was a 44 by Davis in the 24th frame, the last of the third evening." BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:12, 14 June 2021 (UTC)


### References
References 3, 4, 8, 9, 17, 18, 21, 22, 23, 25, 26 and all the ones in Reference 29 might need the page numbers added
Missing page numbers added.. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:26, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
Am putting the review on hold to allow the nominator to address/query the points raised above MWright96 (talk) 13:30, 14 June 2021 (UTC)

Many thanks for conducting the review and for your helpful comments, MWright96. Let me know about anything else that needs to be done. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:26, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
@BennyOnTheLoose: Now promoting to GA class MWright96 (talk) 17:47, 14 June 2021 (UTC)