Russian roulette
Partly to escape boredom, he attempts suicide, playing at Russian roulette with a handgun on several occasions – incidents he describes in chilling detail; later, he notes, working as a journalist in war zones provided him with the danger and adrenalin that the games of Russian roulette had done – but in a way that could seem legitimate. The aim, he implies, was still the same, i.e. to court danger in order to escape from boredom, while seeking some sort of purpose in one’s life.