I met him in a crowded room. Where people go to drink away their gloom. He sat me down and so began. The story of a charmless man. Educated the expensive way. He knows his claret from his beaujolais. I think he’d like to have been Ronnie Kray. But then nature didn’t make him that way. He thinks he’s educated airs those family shares. Will protect him that we’ll respect him. He moves in circles of friends who just pretend. That they like him he does the same to them. And when you put it all together. There’s the model of a charmless man. He knows the singers and their cavalry. Says he can get in anywhere for free. I began to go a little cross-eyed. And from this charmless man I just had to hide. He talks at speed he gets nosebleeds. He doesn’t see his days are tumbling down upon him. And yet he tries so hard to please. He’s just so keen for you to listen. But no-one’s listening. And when you put it all together there’s the model of a charmless man.