Jumped out of the second floor of a record store. With a Treacherous Four cassette and a cassette recorder. In Ecuador with Edward Norton. Witness the metamorphosis. Of a legend growin' like an expert swordsman. From the Hessian war and. Hence the origin of the Headless Horseman. Born with the endorphins of a pathetic orphan. Endless sores and reservoir. Of extension cords in dresser drawers. And deadbolts on the bedroom doors. And sexual torture kits kept in a separate storage bin. Excellent boyfriend. Use intercourse to settle scores. With women who have been vendettas towards men. Dickhead is forced in to the shredded foreskin. Red is torn and they're only bein' fed a portion. Bed sores in sore shins. Pregnant whores can get abortions. Fetish for stickin' metal forks in self-absorption. Skeletor I went to Hell and fell a floor. A predator I'm headed for competitors. Better warn 'em what I lack in tact and a set of morals. I make up for in metaphors like a cosmetic store. Stegosaurus Chuck Norris with a thesaurus. Yes of course I mess up once. You want some? Come and get some boys!. I'm givin' Daniel Pantaleo a refresher course. On excessive force and pressure points. And dressin' George Zimmerman in a fluorescent orange. Dress and four inch heels to address the court. With a bullseye on his back his whole chest and torso. Are left on the doorsteps of Trayvon's dad. As a present for him. In my present form I'm Desert Storm. Appetite for destruction is no suppressant for. Aggressive forceful and less remorseful in every morsel. Unpleasant horrible; hello gorgeous!. The rebel with devil horns just fell off the yellow short bus. Met a contortionist said "When you wanna get sexual? ". She said "However I fit in your schedule I'm flexible. ". Expired tags on the Saturn got Kathryn Beck. In the back in Daisy Dukes with the hazards on. At a traffic stop gettin' harassed sign an autograph. For this asshole cop's daughter. Laugh 'cause I called her a brat on it. He spat on it and brought it back lookin' half in shock. Had a heart attack and dropped dead. Started fallin' back with it. And got slapped with a Colin Kaepernick practice sock. One ball and half a dick Apple Watch. Crack for an axle. Wwalked in a Bass Pro Shop with David Hasselhoff. Pulled Tabasco sauce out of my satchel. Knocked over a fisherman's tackle box and *crash sound*. Asked if they had a laugh in stock. That was fuckin' stupid. You got it twisted all 'cause I offered this bitch. A doggie biscuit you call me misogynistic. Bitch get to massagin' this dick!. Like spas in this bitch slob on it with gobs of lipstick. Got a shoppin' list for you to run some odds and ends with. It's not a bitch on this earth I can be monogamous with. She's non-existent. Robin Thicke with a throbbin' dick. On some swab and slick shit. But I shout derogatives at bitches. Like fuckin' missile launches. Misfit blond and nitwit. Like I've gone ballistic with a frostin' tip kit. Screamed "I hate blondes" and became one I'm optimistic. Love to start shit. Shovin' Clark Kent's undergarments. In the glove compartment. Of the bucket bumpin' Bubba Sparxx. I'm double parkin' up at Targets. Trouble 'cause a double cross. The shadiest mothafucka you'll ever come across. Other than olympic gymnast been known for some assaults. A couple lawsuits enough to cause a stomach ulcer. Same damn brain scan results as Rainman's is. Something's awful when Dustin Hoffman's. Dressin' up in your mummy costume. On stage dancin' to "Brain Damage" what's the problem?. Nothing's wrong the name brand is back to reclaim status. Run the faucet I'm about to dunk. A bunch of Trump supporters underwater. Snuck up on 'em in Ray Bans. In a gray van with a spray tan. It's a wrap like an Ace bandage. Don't-give-a-fuck persona. To my last Dna strand. E&J in the waistband at the Vmas with the stagehand. She wants kielbasa pre-arrange an escape plan. Three-inch blade on point like a See-and-Say. Consider me a dangerous man. But you should be afraid of this dang candidate. You say Trump don't kiss ass like a puppet. 'Cause he runs his campaign. With his own cash for the fundin'. And that's what you wanted. A fuckin' loose cannon who's blunt with his hand. On the button who doesn't have to answer to no one. Great idea!. If I was president. Gettin' off is the first order of business. Once I get in office. Second thing that'll make me happy's. Walkin' up to Uncle Sam. Naked laughing dick cupped in hand. Screamin' "Fuck safe sex". Throw a latex and an Aids test at him. Tell Congress I run this land. And I want the rubber banned and make it snappy. Addiction to friction and static. Addict who can't escape the habit. It's in you to chase the dragon. But as fate would have it I walked up in major Magics. Dressed as the maintenance man. In a laser tag vest and a racin' jacket. With a gauge to blast it. And sped away in the station wagon. Stacey Dash's and Casey Anthony's. Crazy asses in the backseat. Throwin' Stay-Free pads at me. Dead passenger in the passenger seat. Unfasten the safety latches. And slam on the brakes in traffic so hard. I snapped the relocation brackets for the monster tires. Finna get a murder case and catch it. Like you threw it at me. Encased in plastic. And send Dylan Roof through the windshield of the Benz. Until he spins like a pinwheel and begins feelin'. Like a windmill with a thin bill. While his skin's peelin'. And skids 'til he hits a cement pillar. Swing for the fence like Prince Fielder. Knock it into the upper peninsula. You want to go against zilla? The Rap God. When will I quit? Never been realer. The in-stiller of fear. Not even a scintilla of doubt. Whose pens iller than Prince in a chinchilla. Or Ben Stiller in a suspense thriller. Revenge killer of bin syllable binge. Fill a syringe till I. Draw first blood. Even pop shit on my pop shit. And it's popular. Couldn't be more awkwarder. Cause you're innocence I robbed you of. It's my fingers that got stuck up. Tortured a not give a. Slapstick hockey puck. The broad hunter with the sawed off. Like an arm when it's lopped off. But I'm not gonna get the shotgun. Or the Glock I'm gonna opt for the ox. Cause I'm into objects that are sharp when I sharpen. It's not a shock I'm such an obnoxious fucker. The rock cuts into rock cause who would have thought. This much of a cocksucker that go across the buttocks. Of Vivica Fox with a box cutter. That was for 50 little slap on the wrist be warned. I'm unrevealing quickly. My squabbles I'm grappling. With your time traveling with me. Try and follow as I wobble relapse into history. With a flask of the whiskey. Tip it back then. I'm twisting wine bottles. Like what happened to Chris Reeves spine column. That's the plan of attack. When I'm fixing my problems. Wish my chest wasn't having. To get these rhymes off 'em. But the fact that I have so many rappers against me. Mind boggles. And why I had to come back on these faggots who diss me. More of a spectacular mystery. Than a fucking Agatha Christie crime novel. But my patience is wearing thin. Swear I been contemplating rubbing shit. In your face till I smear it in. Diss you in every lyric until you fear the pen. And never appear again. If you actually had fucking careers to end. But then I think of Molly Qerim. And I steer'em in that direction. And forget my ideas for them. Molly I'm gone off you. Man light some kush. You're my first take I'll nail you. Can't lie I gush. If I won you over you would be the grand prize. I'm entranced by your looks. Come and give the Shady franchise a push. You can get it in a can like some Anheuser Busch. Jeans too small least three pant sizes tush. Mushed against your damn side you puss. And thighs are squooshed. What kind of attires that?. I'm ready to be rode. Psychopath bet you we'll get it popping. Like a flat. Light the match to ignite the wrath. Got knives to slash and slice hermaphrodites in half. Piper Chapmans might just have to picket me. Like a scab. Hard to describe in fact. Startling violent perhaps. Are things that come to mind. As soon as I start spitting rhymes like that. And you aren't really surprised at that. But as far as these lines I rap. And these bars wouldn't dial it back. If I star 69'ed the track. Why am I such a dick?