I like glitter and sparkly dresses. But I'm not gonna talk about that. In my monologue. I like baking and things that smell like winter. But I'm not gonna talk about that. In my monologue. La la la. La la la. I like writing songs about douchebags who cheat on me. But I'm not gonna say that. In my monologue. I like writing their names into songs so they're. ashamed to go in public. But I'm not gonna say that. In my monologue. La la la la la la la. This is my musical monologue. You might think I'd bring up Joe. That guy who broked up with me on the phone. But I'm not gonna mention him. In my monologue. "-Hey joe! I'm doin' real well! ". Tonight I'm hosting SNL. But I'm not gonna brag about that. In my monologue. La la la. ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. ha ha ha. La la la. And if you're wondering if I might be dating. the werewolf from Twilight. (Inaudible: -Hi Taylor! Send a kiss and wink). I'm not gonna comment on that. In my monologue. La la la. La la la la. This is my musical monologue. You might be expecting me to say. Something bad about Kanye. And how he ran up on the stage. And ruined my VMA monologue. (pause *take a deep breath). But there's nothing more to say. Cause everything's OK. I've got security lining the stage. It's my SNL monologue. La la la. la la la la. This is my SNL monologue. La la la. la la la la. That was my SNL monologue