Bald as I Wanna Be
A popular columnist for theWashington Postand commentator for ESPN'sThe  Sports Reporters, Kornhesier continues to chew on the big issues that he tackled inPumping  Irony. His monologue-like columns enjoy, to say the least, a good rant. He opines outrageously, for  example, on the oxymoronic logic of up-to-the-minute medical "breakthroughs." A study in theJournal of the American Medical Associationreports that doctors who have one or two daily drinks  are less likely to suffer heart attacks. "Should we," asks Kornheiser, "be concerned that  the study was conducted on doctors?"From the momentous details of Amerika-the-Commercial ("I have the new Michael Jordan  Cologne in my office... a sample card that I picked up at Foot Locker.... I sniffed the card, found the odor  rather perky, left it on my desk, and thought nothing more about it until my friend Nancy walked in the office and asked me if I'd had the carpet sprayed for scarab-beetle infestation.") to the mock  sublime (his 13-year-old daughter going off to summer camp), this irrepressible humorist will give you the  stamina to consider the absurdities of angst-ridden modern life.