Crossing the Tracks for Love: What to Do When You and Your Partner Grew Up in Different Worlds
There is barely a day that goes by that I am not looking up something in the book about my marriage for which I had crossed the tracks for love . I never picked up on the fact that many of the poverty factors that were at play when it came to raising my stepchildren were also at play in my marriage, until I read Crossing the Tracks. Having attended Ruby Payne s training, I found the information to be very interesting, not just from the standpoint of being a teacher, but also as a step-mother who had two stepchildren living with her at the time. Until I had the Ruby Payne training, I could not understand why I felt I had failed with both of these young people. The training opened my eyes to the hidden rules of poverty and of the middle class, and made me understand why the children did not value what I valued. I shared what I had learned with my then husband (the children s father) who was a truck driver (from Indiana) who was not home very much. I also shared it with my husband s mother, paternal grandmother of the children. They were not nearly as struck by the information as I was. After the Ruby Payne training, I understood that Kent s first wife came from generational poverty. When Kent and I met and married, she and Kent s three children were back living in poverty. I learned through reading Crossing the Tracks that Kent also had poverty in his background and that is why he had so much trouble with my Middle class ways . Kent s mother once told me that I must have come from a rich family. I never thought of myself as rich I just thought of myself as middle class. As you can see Crossing the Tracks has been a real eye opener for me. Please convey to Ruby Payne my thanks for writing such an informative and enlightening book. I am eternally grateful!!! Keep up the good work!!! --Rosmary VaughnAs mentioned in the New York Times Magazine article by Paul Tough, June 10, 2007 --New York Times MagazineAs mentioned in the New York Times Magazine article by Paul Tough, June 10, 2007 --New York Times MagazineAs mentioned in the New York Times Magazine article by Paul Tough, June 10, 2007 --New York Times Magazine