> But I am doing nothing useful to the society really... I'd love work something related to space, or brains, or artificial intelligence, or something amazing.

There's your first problem: looking for a meaningful existence in an activity that is also supposed to pay the mortgage. Good luck to you in making those two intersect. But look at what you're asking in another way: "I'd like to tie my identity to my vocation, but finding a vocation that allows that while supporting my 'software money' lifestyle is difficult. What to do?"

I've given up on doing that. I'm not saying everyone should, don't get me wrong. But finding a job that gives me purpose and meaning in life, and pays six figures is fighting strong opposing odds. That's fine, of the work I do I usually enjoy it even if I'm not finding the cure for cancer. If I had my way, I'd work full time at the NPO animal shelter I spend a lot of time at. But even the director (IOW, the big boss) only pulls down $65K a year. I'd settle for that, but I'm not getting her job anytime soon. The best I could probably do would be a little above minimum wage, and probably not 40 hours.

So what do I do? I work whatever software job keeps me interested and pays the bills. With the wheelbarrows of money that brings in, I donate to causes I feel should be supported. Sure, that might cut into my BMW M5 money but you don't get your cake and eat it, too. I mean, what nobility is there in a job that pays the salary that many of have become accustomed to, and still allows us to feel that there's "meaning" in our work? Where's the sacrifice? Quit trying to tie the two together and you'll get on much better, IMO. Sometimes the two coincide, most of the time they don't; don't force it.

I'm not just a checkbook volunteer, either. In the case of the animal shelter, I've logged over 200 volunteer hours this year. Though not a professional dog trainer (though at this point, going pro would merely involve a test and a few other hoops), I train dogs with behavior problems to make them more adoptable. Sometimes it's not that glamorous: taking a stream of dogs out for a walk and picking up their shit. One after another, repeat for two hours. Am I changing the world? Depends on who you ask. The dog who came in a mental basket case who I trained to be a civilized member of society, and later got adopted, might argue that I may not have changed the world but I changed his world.

Meaningful volunteer opportunities abound. Coach a kids team. Help your local church's homeless outreach. Whatever your "thing" is, there's an organization that can put you to work. Sports, animals, computers, whatever. Personally speaking, I go home every time feeling like the world is just an eensy, weensy bit better due to my actions, rather that hoping we find that big breakthrough at work in a few years so it'll all be worth it rather than just another day at the office.

> I probably just have it too good or I'm just meant to be miserable.

To use an over-used cliche: it's definitely a first-world problem. Most people in the world go to work so that they and their children don't starve and have to live on the streets. If we find meaning in it, we're fortunate. For a large part of history the vast majority stayed one step ahead of the wolf by working whenever the sun was up.

I'll close with this: if you think working on things that you classify as "amazing" or "great", all while pulling down 'software money', is noble then I think you're looking at it backwards and will never find satisfaction. Once you learn to see the greatness in picking up dog shit, for free, your answer will come to you much more quickly.