what is the normal amount of time to get promoted from level x to level x+1?

if it's 2 to 3 years, then you're fine -- keep working.

if you're already past the point at which you should have been promoted, then maybe something is up.

i would guess at least half of these cases are "don't worry about the meek guy/girl".

it's not necessarily intentional evil by the managers/company, it's just "the squeaky wheel gets the grease".

so the non-squeaky wheel does _not_ get the grease.

you're the non-squeaky/quiet wheel.

this would seem to comport with those social studies type reports that come out every few months (disclaimer: who knows what percentage of any social studies actually have merit) that say, basically, the worst humans get promoted the most and are the most successful.

i'm sympathetic to that point of view. yes, there are exceptions, obviously, but.

self-promotion, being an asshole, being loud, assertive, etc. -- they matter. if we believe the studies, they matter a lot.

so, you could make noise. and maybe you'd get fired. or forced out. or maybe you'll get promoted next time around.

i'm sure there are books out there on being more assertive. i need to read them myself. sounds like maybe you could use to do the same, tho you got dropped into a tough situation, so it's understandable.

you could try to transfer teams.

you could try to change companies.

i've been interviewing a lot and been getting a lot of grief for 'job hopping'. and my resume could reasonably be described as at least 'bouncy' if not 'hoppy', but the point is that 'stability' (i.e. staying at the same job for a few years no matter how shit) still matters to potential employers.

to stay positive, i would suggest a plan of action -- to take action, if and when you decide things need to change. this will allow you to dwell in a hopeful present.

without that plan, you might wake up one day and find out your life seems over. maybe you're 'just' burned out. maybe you're depressed. and that stuff is real. you think burnout will just take a couple weeks of vacation to cure? you're from a hard-working 'x' background that doesn't believe in things like burnout?

all the more reason to put together that plan. we're all products of our current environments.

think of all the toxic american males who are blowing their brains out every day, before or after they murder a bunch of other people.

that's a bit extreme, but you get the point - don't let yourself fall into burnout/depression. it can happen seemingly overnight. and by the time you post something like this to HN, you might be more than well on your way.

the plan can be simple.

i'm going to:

- read two books on being more assertive (including and especially at work)

- talk to a real career coach, who i will spend real money on, to give me actual-expert advice on how to deal with the specifics of my situation.

- set a deadline for when the promotion needs to happen, and if it does not, you'll start your job hunt in earnest, tho you should start 'getting out there' right away - this will also help preserve your sanity. online meetups/etc. mailing lists. this website. indie hackers. etc.

i tried to move laterally-ish within one company i was at, couldn't make it happen, so split. my mgr was actually trying to help me shift, but it still didn't happen. so i left -- mgr was cool with it/supportive. and that's part of why i'm getting grief today for job hopping. :-D

i think the main caveat/warning here is -- you have to make sure they/the company/manager knows that you want/expect/need to be promoted.

maybe they'll disagree, or just refuse it, etc., but you don't want to end up leaving and then find out that there was a legitimate miscommunication. that would just be weird and stupid and counterproductive for everyone.