'I say this with ulterior motives.  I started a Meetup a while ago in my area, so I'm also curious if anyone else is around here:  Siouxland INFJ Meetup (Sioux Falls, SD) - Meetup  I'm also...|||I think I know what you mean, ThatKid.  It's not enough to be present with extraverts, they expect us to carry a certain kind of energy to the conversation.  Something like a late night talk show or...|||Yeah, I know.  Sometimes I slip and wonder if there's some skill I need to focus on.  And we all know the answer:  stay in the present moment and just have fun.  If she doesn't like me, it wasn't...|||What a dumb feeling.  I'm just fine socializing with people at work and one-on-one.  I can shoot the breeze with the ESFJ there and have a great time because she's providing a lot of energy.  So why...|||I agree, it's tough.  Every field is like this today, unfortunately.  I remember seeing flyers boasting that social work is the fastest growing field! as states continue to add professional...|||As a social worker, sequenceofsound brought the goods in this thread.  If you go into this field, all your experience will help you at another level.  I'm currently working in mental health care but...|||Transform the outside world into your internal one.  Exercise outside regularly and feel your mind's reaction to your body.  Go to a park and use your surroundings to inform what you write down. ...|||I love this.  I have the same weird pauses and mannerisms in conversation.|||Lots of psych majors.  Why am I not surprised...  I'm a therapist.  :D|||I'd be open to talking with people 1:1.  I'm in my 20s--as long as any of you out there at least that age, I don't care about other traits.|||You sound like a classic INFJ.  I'm in close to the same boat.  I have a good grasp on my feelings' uses and don't need to ascribe more meaning to them than necessary.  However, I also value myself...|||It's not that we're necessarily just introverted, we're extraverted in such a niche way that we turn off with most people.|||That's the problem, really.  Or rather, my problem.  I look outside and, despite Sioux Falls being the epicenter of nowhere, I find there is plenty to do.  I have a park system that has all sorts of...|||Children of Men The Fountain (OP beat me to it!) Pan's Labyrinth|||Keep attending activities that attract more high-brow conversation.  I'm starting to go to Freethinker meetings in my city and I can see a lot of potential INFJs in that group.  Or, you know, meet...|||My voice is all over the place.   Part of it is my diaphragm -- it's a good way to tell if I'm tired.  Sometimes others will joke with me about how svelte it sounds over a loudspeaker, other times...|||You know, I'm not sure.  I definitely know I don't connect with others as well as I should, but then again, school and work have cut me off socially in many ways.  If I had to give a general answer,...|||Pull back from her stuff and focus on developing healthy rapport with your co-workers.  The only way to win her game is to not play it.  The real problem isn't your choice, it's the fact that she's...|||I hear you.  When I put on a facial expression, it's obviously put on.  Probably best that way; there are too many people out there who know how to put on faces.  With that said, you might be more...|||My supposed shyness really depends on the people.  There's only so much I can do with Fe in a highly-charged S setting but I can do just fine in a laid-back place.  With ES, the whole point is chaos...|||I'd be happy to find any kind of two-sided friendship, which is why I'm so frustrated with myself socially.  I've tried and tried to meet others halfway, only to be pushed away.  At this point, I...|||This is just speculation on my part, but I think our perception of problems tend to come from an inferior Se.  That is, whenever we look through Se, we see it the way we think a poor Se stereotype...|||Lenore Thomson writes that INFJs often use Ti, our tertiary function, to tune out of the world when we feel stressed.|||Not projecting for anyone else here.  I work some hours in a liquor store and find most of the regulars to be fairly friendly.  If they want to do that on their time, go ahead.  There are other,...|||Making final judgments on someone based on first impressions.|||There really is no point to alcohol.  Yes, a chemical depressant is going to liven the party up.  And then we'll get sick afterwards.  That makes perfect sense.|||Social interactions are too easy to view from a relativist perspective.  I often have to ask myself what I want from an interaction and if it will necessarily infringe on my boundaries, and vice...|||Ni:  That person said to throw a party for someone.  Hmm.  But what does that mean, really?  Is modern society truly so generous as to give a citizen a celebration for his or her own benefit, or...|||Yeah, I've been there.  Whenever I get into that state of mind, I'm reminded of this:   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SC0NuBaliLs|||I think it's fairly simple.  The healthy extraverts are already out socializing with each other.  We're often on the edge of the room and willing to listen to someone.  Usually that someone doesn't...|||Excellent post, Jawz.  Good social health is definitely not determined by personality type.  When I facilitate groups at the hospital, I often see introverted folks engage in just as anti-social...|||Being gay is not necessarily the big stigma, it's just being perceived as less masculine, e.g. less like a white male in power.  Oh, he's gay, but at least he acts like a man.  This extends down...|||I've felt better about my true self since finding out about the INFJs Forum and here.  It's still not easy in rl but at least I have a half-formed compass now.|||Even if you pull back your efforts, you will still get different responses from different people.  You might be seen as too helpful or unhelpful despite what you're thinking.  I just focus on what's...|||It's a matter of perspective.  We INFJs often possess an inner mission that can seem other-worldly to those who don't share it.  It's a great trait to have but it will look different to different...|||Many people still think borderline psychotic when they hear about BPD, which just isn't true.  It refers to behavior that lies between totally passive and totally anti-social.  Unfortunately, it's...|||I'd feel out the amount and intensity of negative emotions and take it from there.  I would ask questions and advise but also do so at the same emotional level that person is experiencing.|||I'm this way too but I'm still very INFJ.  The Ni-Fe loop can sometimes create energy if we translate more of the external world into abstract thoughts.|||No one in the external world.  There seems to be a common trend (here and on the INFJs Forum) of constantly trying to understand oneself and finding true authenticity, which can feel like a battle. ...|||The Jedi/The Monk- Hiding in plain sight, we look like we know more than we let on, even if we really don't.  The Astral Warriors - We're often fighting emotional battles away from everyone else....|||High school through college was the worst time I've been through.  The crisis of deciding what to do next took about three months and then I was off to the races.  Not looking back.   I'm finding...|||I have no regrets about past actions.  I only measure my current quality of life.  That said, I've often tried too hard to be SJ...you can  imagine the consequences.|||Hey, so it is!  It likely does say something about us.  Maybe it means that it's less healthy for us to be around types that need to relieve stress externally without taking some steps first.|||The clients I've seen in therapy who have demonstrated INFJ traits were unhealthy enough to be anti-social and suffer emotional intensity disorder.  The doorslam was being used for all sorts of...|||If you think male brutality and chauvinism somehow empowers women, as the director described it, watch Suckerpunch.  I saw it in theaters, unfortunately.|||That article describes me pretty well.  I get into an obsessive state when writing papers so that I can focus on the details better.  I take too many notes so that I can pare it down into something...|||Funny you mention the apes.  In another documentary that same group suffered an outbreak of disease when they found food in a trash site.  Because the aggressive apes got all the food, they died. ...|||I'm more in-between here.  I'm very Ethical in outlook and activity but my affect tends to show as Intuitive, likely due to a need to turn off Ni when surrounded by people.|||The idealist works in the background until the time is right with a slow, steady, secret strategy.  If it's successful, it will already be in place and working before the public notices.  Ideally...|||Without the J, I would be stuck in another world.  I'm glad to finish what I start.'