'@niss: I went back to those ISTJ yo yo links to open and share with a friend (dating her own istj) and I cannot get them to open on my phone anymore.  Do the links expire?|||Found the whole thread derailment on colonge versus BO funny and ironic.   Two days ago I literally just told my ISTJ BF that I loved how clean he always smelled.  Always, always  just a nice clean...|||I am an ENFP woman dating an ISTJ man for the last 8 months.  He does a lot of what you described in your post.   I very much feel your pain and insecurities.  I have a very  on stage  job, which I...|||Interesting perspective.  I have been wondering if much of my relationship angst comes from the loupey Lou  garbage that media throws at us as well.  I question,  well my relationship is nothing...|||Wasn't one the initial questions on this post something along the lines of  ISTJ and ENFP relationship, is it really that complicated or hard?.    I find great irony in the 198 pages,of this...|||Hi! Spent the first 30 years of my life figuring out who I was professionally and personally.   Then married waaay too soon (because I thought that was the next step in life adventure!) . Discovered...|||He hits a lot of those demographics for suicide.  I have been concerned about the risk (because of some offhand comments he's made in the past about his current financial situation on top of all that...|||After 8 months , i just stumbled across that my ISTJ  has a brother who died not too long ago.  I found a photo on his mantle and asked who it was, and he told me his brother.  I casually noted that...|||@Galdurnit: thank you for the positive perspective from the other side :).  It's nice to hear a success story!|||Thank you for that reminder.  I was beginning to seriously feel that I am not allowed to express fear, anxiety or anger about a life stressor.... like it burdens those I love.  Which goes against...|||This seems to describe me very well: https://thoughtcatalog.com/elise-mcgill/2015/03/here-is-the-voice-of-an-enfp/amp/|||When I am really invested emotionally.  Whether it be a job that really works for me or an Romaric relationship that I finally allow myself to feel in. It makes me feel vulnerable and insecure. ...|||Half a chicken breast.  Half a chocolate chip cookie and half a protein shake|||Dr. Strange (DVD).  Right up my alley because I am totally into the mind power science.  All Kinds of studies and anecdotal evidence we live in a holographic universe and make our own path as well...|||Try intermittent fasting instead.  Much safer and more productive than purging.  You can read about it if you google Dave Asprey or Bulletproof Diet and intermittent fasting.  There is sound science...|||Adolescence (Ages 12-20): not particularly bothered by weight... just wanted bigger boobs.  I was naturally thin and lean  Early Adulthood (Ages 20-35): I was okay until about 27 and then started...|||I have also heard  crazy in the head- crazy in the bed hahahaha But really, if they are viewing me as crazy- it's not because of how I act towards them.  I usually hear from them (down the road) I...|||That is a totally valid point.  I just don't know how to avoid this.  I don't start out to be idealized lol.  I try to be myself from start to finish (well, except I don't show my negative emotions...|||Does anyone else deal with people chasing you to get closer to you (romantically, friendship or even some family members) and then when they finally wear down the walls, they freak out and run away? ...|||My ISTJ guy told me he felt guilty because he wasn't able to give me as much time to our relationship that it deserved..  He felt guilty because we were intimate without having proper dates. ...|||This sums it up exactly.  I usually only get really lazy because I am exhausted from being such a damn  feeler.  Sometimes I look at everyone else around me and think  I feel too many emotions,...|||@niss: Thank you for posting the  oldies about ISTJ yo-yo behavior.  Very interesting read. I appreciate you taking the time to direct me to those posts.  Can't say I really understand it or am cut...|||I find it ironic that ENFP's  are painted as flighty and the ISTJ as steadfast.  My ISTJ man has broken up with me twice, because he freaked out about how fast HE was moving in the relationship.   I...|||As an ENFP woman, I have so many thoughts and feelings bouncing around, that sometimes I literally feel uncentered .  I tend to gravitate to intelligent ISTJ types.  I find that they still...|||Do ISTJ really want the space or is it a secret test of loyalty? My very stressed (and financially strapped) ISTJ male has brought up to me that he feels bad that he can't take me on proper dates...|||Only when I lose someone,  that I love tremendously, to death of break up.  I had to put my beloved Great Dane to sleep yesterday and I have had a full blown emotional breakdown.  My family is...|||@chad86tsi:  reading your posts have been eye opening for me.    As an xNFP,  my need to connect with my beautiful ISTJ man was so strong, I have been always willing to keep reaching out when he ...|||thought it was a fun read!  The part about Introverts was pretty dead on.  I live in the manic pixie mode a good part of the time.  I think it can wear out the introverts who brave a romantic...|||@jcal: Thank you for your frank honesty and insight from the  other side.  It's amazing how people can be so fundamentally different.  The ISTJ expectation will be to reengage exactly where...|||@chad86tsi: thank you for sharing the perspective of someone involved long term with an ISTJ.   What you shared is very relateabke!! I think his cycles are exacerbated right now because he's being...|||Do ISTJ have hidden intuition or are they just stealthily very observant of their SO?  Everything I have read states ISTJ are supposedly  oblivious to the emotions of others.  However my ISTJ has...|||I know many blogs say this never happen but they apologize on occasion.  My ISTJ actually apologized, to me today, for the first time- in the 7 months of dating.  He apologized for  going dark  for...|||Why  Average looking specifically?  Many pretty girls have good hearts and would be great people to date as well.  I would think a list would just say  someone I find physically attractive. ...|||I am so very happy to have found this forum months ago.  It helped me to understand his need for privacy from the very beginning.   He was also very upfront about being a private person.  Actually...|||The ISTJ in my life has triggered me to grow and learn.  He has tutored a previously sheltered woman on things like buying a car, buying a house and how to stand up for myself (requesting fair and...|||So me and my ISTJ Guy!  I try so hard to edit the text down- still huge about if words. I think they get to a point where we sound like  wah wa wah like Charlie browns teacher, to the ISTJ!|||What a great gift! These are things I had to learn later in life.  Sometimes I felt I was too sensitive for the world around me.  I absolutely love the power tool comment!! Bit envious too- they look...|||@SoftBoiledLife:  you asked about how ISTJ makes ENFP more calm? We ENFP, despite being extroverts, live in our heads ALOT.  We try to read meaning into everything and are constantly thinking of...|||Cry at mocies, some commercials, pieces of classical music and I love the fantasy of amusement parks like universal studios!|||An ISTJ boyfriend has me wanting to learn patience and causing me to stifle that instinct to run away when I get frustrated.  Six months in, the  fluff (the good morning and goodnight) texts are...|||I would actually take bickering over the stone cold silence. (And as ENFP, I usually hate arguing).  Cycles of the istj man,  thinking I am wonderful and sharing his innermost thoughts with me,...|||ENFP female here.  It takes a lot of unkind words and treatment to kill my love.  Every ugly episode causes me to emotionally pull away and disengage (I don't like to fight.)  The other person senses...|||Anyone else get worn out from thinking about so many things at one time? Or ever wish they didn't feel things so intensely? Or start to doubt that your intuition, that you were sure about in the...|||My iPod is full of a ton of different groups, styles, etc, so when I do go looking for something it's either a good beat to work to, or a sad country song to cry to, etc.   I find that I pick...|||The Smiths : for those days when you  feel  too much.  I get in my car, open the sun roof and drive really fast as a mini version of running away https://youtu.be/OztC_7nkAd8|||Dear ISTJ male, Thank you for being one of the few males that don't treat me like I am sort of exotic trophy to be hunted, a Barbie doll to be parade around  or some sort of porn fantasy to live out...|||Yes. Much worse when I was in college and mid 20's.  Not with malintent.  I thought all people were as interested as helping each other as I was.   My mother used to say I could talk the bees out of...|||If you read through the ISTJ forums, some mention that we are too tigger like and talkative.  Ironically, my ISTJ boyfriend talks more than I do when we are together.   Granted he can go hide his...|||Absolutely!  It happened only when I grew into comfort of my own body... and only with someone I am crazy in love with.  My first marriage was a horrible 13 years and I thought I just wasn't gifted...|||Update:  I  want to first thank everyone who took time to answer my initial post.  I listened, processed and tried to apply the thoughtful insights that were shared.  My ISTJ eventually came out of...'