'I think he definitely doesn't want to use me as a sex toy (last week when we talked, I got emotional and said that our arrangement made me feel like I'm just the woman he sleeps with until he finds...|||He seems to be changing a bit. Not sure. We were cuddling looking at the moon last night and he quietly said I'm not sleeping with anyone else. But I haven't been single in years and just want you...|||thank you for the words of wisdom. I'm not sure how to reply with quotes on my iPhone but it seems clear I need to ask for what I want and see how he replies. I just think it's a waste of time as he...|||He told me the best way to get him to chase someone is for her to dump him. Sigh.|||So what is the best course of action? If one were to preserve the friendship and sanity. I can't imagine he respects me.  We are currently in wine country having a beautiful time. But I think for...|||This. This has to be precisely what's going on here. I think it's related to him not having his shit together (that's why I think his rule exists to not fool around with or sleep with other people in...|||Hi everyone,  I want to give some context on my relationship with an ISTP before asking specific questions. My hope is to give you enough background on us and his statements/actions to hopefully...|||You are frustrated. :) You should probably relax...|||Oh I've been there/done that here so I get it. This was more psychological analysis, Ne-style. I think this kind of exploration frustrates ENTJs as they want to cut to the chase and flex that TeSe. ...|||Thanks for the advice. I was uncomfortable with him and wanted to sift through the data before getting back to him. I've actually just decided to block him from my phone. Being a paranoid social...|||Uber Pool gets you to your destination but there is occasionally some backtracking involved. I typically tether to my cell phone and use the time to answer emails and be productive. The subway...|||No drama, just a question posed to ENTJs. Hard to run a company with drama, bae.|||Among the questions the ENTJ asked was where I was raised. I gave him a general geographical area (this ain't my first rodeo people). He replied with him hometown. The driver was silent throughout...|||I was chatting with the lady who does my nails and she told me that a lot of her clients get asked out in Ubers or Lyfts. 1/3rd of US couples who got married in the last decade met online. Never...|||I suspect either depersonalization or sex addiction, more likely the latter.    There is some truth to this, but the difference is that I can admit my curiosity to myself. Just not to him, which...|||There is nothing better than Ti paranoia (and I mean that as a sincere compliment). You INTPs think of things that would never occur to me.|||I am torn between wanting to discuss my observations with him (I am an ENFP, my hidden agenda is to know) and just sending him a summary text and being done with it.  Blast my interest in the human...|||It's possible. Male CEOs sometimes see me as a challenge, I suspect in part because there are so few women in their ranks and partially because I am a bad bitch.  Ok I just giggled typing that, but...|||My best friend is an INTP. She is so deep, smart, drama-free (externally anyway). We live to entertain each other with (sometimes ridiculous) observations on life. We can approximate bliss and be...|||@Nell: Asking questions deludes you into the idea that he may want a relationship with you, which given his position probably keeps many women at his beck and call.  What an insightful...|||He likely has other women, he definitely is used to getting what he wants, and no way is interested in anything meaningful.  I'll pass. Initiative and charm can be sexy, bossiness and manipulation...|||I allowed for that, which is why I asked the cab driver if he was asking me out. The driver thought it was funny that I couldn't tell whether I was being hit on or not.   More importantly, when he...|||Where are the male ENTJs? I would be curious to hear their analysis.   (I have noticed subtle differences between female and male NTJs in terms of how they approach dating, dominance/submission,...|||I work in an industry oft-decried for its stubbornly mysogynistic tendencies as well as it's horrific work-life balance. So his methods were extreme but not unfamiliar. Determining socio-economic...|||Uber Pool is a shared on-demand taxi service...  Re: bold: my experience has actually been different in terms of dating ENTJs and INTJs. The ENTJs who have asked me out have pursued me with a...|||Wow. This is fascinating commentary!  I have been cornered by a few INTJs onlne and IRL who are just as calculating as the above comments suggest. They definitely experiment but then again so do...|||You have anxiety. You have low self-esteem. You are not full aligned with reality, and you are doing things like deleting his number when he confronts you with something that may or may not be true...|||Hello, you.   Just popped in here to relate something funny that recently happened to me.  I was recently in an Uber Pool sharing a ride across town with a stranger. When the driver pulled up, I...|||It's actually a Gloria-ism from Modern Family that I've adopted. ;)  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om9EhbBo1Yc hehe  One of my favorite things about INTJs is that you will correct us patiently...|||Oh there is no question about whether we will be taking it slowly. I am Mt Kilimanjaro as far as my emotional susceptibility is concerned—having been cheated on, I have now learned to let a man show...|||I am highly susceptible to touch, and it triggers an emotional response in me even when offered platonically. A good friend cuddled me recently and I got immediately drowsy it was so relaxing. I...|||What would cause you to be affectionate to the point where you are sending someone kisses via text, and steering the conversation towards sexual innuendo? In other words, how much would you have to...|||I can eviscerate someone quite effectively if I want to. But that only tends to happen when pushed.   I generally distance myself before I have to behave in a cruel manner. The awareness to do so...|||I don't see him as focused at all. I think he's a mess, and so does he. That is being worked on. Honest people can admit to their inner messiness. ;) I hopefully differ from the personality types...|||So that's an interesting interpretation. I'll think it over, there's a lot of food for thought there.  In the meantime, he came over last night and we talked about things for a good 4 hours at my...|||I want the good stuff! The consistent love, real investment, ongoing support, and demonstrative affection our relationship was founded on. He knows how to do that, he just withdraws most of that when...|||Yes, you called it. ;)    Speaking of standards: apparently, reminding an ENTJ that he is capable of more, that he is living below his standards is a good way to motivate him to get up off the...|||I don't know. I doubt that any one person can help another one get over his fears, much less a stubborn ENTJ. Unless you're like Tony Robbins in his ear day and night.   He gets in his own...|||For those on the edges of their seats, he just wrote back with this answers to my very geeky Google form:  Coffee schmoffee. There will be sex and it will be earth-shattering  You've been on my...|||Boom. :) That's been my thinking.   Conversely, MY litmust test for knowing if I was doing it for the right reasons, was the ire it raised within me to think that a wonderful city was somehow off...|||He is worthy when he commits—I agree. The problem is that he's not afraid of committing to me: he's afraid to commit to a commuter relationship that is both hard on him and that (he fears) may be...|||I cannot imagine being able to control the feeling and result. Half the fun would dissipate if the feelings are positive, and I suspect some Fi stuff would get triggered because I want to be...|||I wonder if there is any way to know our relative responses to pain, but one thing I'm learning from my experience with this ENTJ is that he is much less emotionally resilient than I am. His...|||Yeah, I'd buy this if I didn't know what happens when we get together. We *get together* in every way. Plus, he knows very well that I want more so he'd have to be willfully stupid to believe we can...|||You lot do seem very sentimental. I suspect he is terribly vulnerable when it comes to me otherwise he wouldn't get so emotionally overwhelmed.   (And I don't think you all have a choice about...|||Fucking fascinating. *puts on Ne glasses*  It seemed like he was exposing some vulnerability in his email, too, by admitting he wasn't sure what to do. (I wish I knew whether he was still...|||He says he has a hard time staying away from me, but I plan to tell him when I see him it's all or nothing. I had just resigned myself to forcing myself to fall out of love with him and dating other...|||Why would he want to do that? I thought ENTJs were practical. I mean, I've been considering spending part of the summer in his cityx97which I lovex97and had no intention of contacting him. What's done is...|||goddammit. this came in yesterday.  Hey [doublerainbows],  I'm gonna be in town next week, and I was wondering if you wanted to grab a coffee or something?  Sorry if this is a bit out of the...|||Gosh.  An avoidant attachment style. A mood disorder that previously required mood stabilizers. Emotional fragility. Strong resistance to therapy due to a negative experience on meds. Love...'