'Do you know what type he is? In any case, I suggest dropping the suggestive and just talking to him openly. I'm a control freak myself, although not a neat freak. It helps to tell your SO that it...|||I would think the behavior you describing to be uncharacteristic of ENFJ. He is either intimidated by you or just doesn't like you for whatever reason. Best case scenario, he is under the impression...|||I do love traditions and created some of our own. As I got older (and so did our children) we became more lax with traditions, especially, if they require a lot of effort. But we follow some. ...|||Being married to INTJ for 20 years - yes, they get jealous. Basically, they are very loyal people and don't understand being scattered in relationships. That said , my INTJ knows when I'm joking...|||sorry, double post|||Yep, several times. A few with my then-future-husband as well. I can't recall details of any of them, but I do remember this distinct feeling of certainty that this is how it's going to be. And later...|||Excellent question! I get stuck in both once in a while, probably, equally. I actually learned to recognize Ni Ti pretty well, so I can cut out of it. Fe Se still gives me trouble.|||Just that? I'm not comfortable at all!|||Ha, I will! Thanks!|||Music!     Nothing physical, actually. So, cloud nine - yes, but nothing that is driving me insane.     No, I don't. As long as there are no holes in that logic, of course.|||I love dark humor, does this count? :happy: There are some dark thoughts, too.|||I do have a role and a purpose, but I don't think they necessarily define me, or, at least, none of them define me fully.    I think the Giver description resonated well. However, some other...|||This is the only question that I don't really understand. What does it mean to have a strong sense of identity?    I think so. I believe in the good of humanity, I am striving to do no harm and...|||What do you need to know, I'll answer.|||This is very helpful.    I very much prefer one-on-one conversations, but I trained myself to be inclusive when I'm in a large group. That said, I would never willingly put myself in a big group,...|||I've usually tested as ENFJ, but the older I get, the more introverted and introspective I get. I also have very strong Ni, probably as the result of living with INTJ for 20+ years. My Fe is there,...|||It won't break her if there is something else BIG she is getting out of the relationship. Do you connect mentally? Is there some strong emotion you can share? An interest or hobby in common that she...|||I'm married to INTJ, and I don't think that lack of initiation is something that is specific to INTJs. Especially, sexual initiation - my INTJ never had an issue with it. For you I have one advice -...|||I feel that if I had to explain my career choices through my personality characteristics, then my enneagram (2w3) has more to do with it than my MBTI.    Interesting.. Recently I started thinking...|||Can you explain? What does my ENFJ-ness have to do with this?|||Oh yes, this INTJ told be multiple times he doesn't trust people with things important to him, and does everything himself. I guess I should follow his example.|||Well, it's exactly that. It's not something I could entirely myself, but I can hire help instead of relying on a friend. Really, I think it was a stupid idea on my part :sad:|||Thanks, a very good advice.|||I actually never gave him a timeline, but gave him a way out, multiple times. He kept saying he would do it.    I think he just didn't realize the help I asked about is more than he thought it...|||Haha, my example isn't real, and I'm a PC gal.  I reminded once, and two weeks later my friend promised me he'd get back to me in the next week or so. He said that on his own accord, without me even...|||Let's say a friend asked for your help. For example, you know a lot about electronics, and a friend asked you to help pick out a computer. You keep saying you'll send them a list of models that are...|||If you promised something but then didn't deliver, what could be the reason?|||I apologize if I'm intruding in the INTJ thread, but wouldn't it be fair to say that you also want him less than your freedom of not having kids and being married? I'm not saying this is right or...|||Parenting is hard...|||I don't really know how to answer this and also there may be a multitude of reasons. I generally like knowing how people close to me are doing. Then I can offer support or simply make them feel good...|||Yes, I want to be updated. Your second question is harder - what do you mean by care a lot? You don't have to be my #1 person for me to want to be updated on your life. For example, here is my...|||I love to cook, but I detest cleaning the house. My house is messy, but our dinners and especially desserts are always good :). I was going to offer to cook for you if you could clean my house, but...|||After more info I agree - he may be not sure of what to do next. Perhaps, he needs more time to figure out his own feelings.|||Not important at all, I just don't want to be annoying. I may ask about it next time I see him.|||I finally did it. Didn't say annoying but did mention friendship. The whole day passed before I got a response. I offered to meet again after one of his half days (the next one is in June, and...|||Sounds great, considering everything else you wrote about her after this statement.|||I would say that he is not interested. Sorry, maybe it's not what you hope to hear, but here's my thinking: Maybe he got embarrassed by your compliment, but it's not hard for ENFJ to understand what...|||I used to work at the same place as my husband, same team, same boss. I started first, then there was an opening that he was perfect for, and he got hired. I was told the company was wary of...|||Never thought about it this way. I thought it's just me - I'm always questioning everything.     Should I send you some Old Spice?|||The general rule of thumb is not to do it, unless one of you can afford to quit the job. Also, you need to be 100% sure the other person is not a jerk. Doesn't have to turn out to be THE ONE, but if...|||What's your relationship to this ENFJ? A good one will easily sense your limit, and protect you from overload (see below).    I'm ENFJ married to INTJ. I've been protecting him from social life...|||I know what you mean. When USA had several Ebola cases in 2014, there was this pretty real (not fictional) Dr. Brantly, who caught the disease in Africa, but survived. He was given some plasma...|||Not if they are talking about plasma donation: Blood Transfusion : Blood Groups and Compatibilities|||No, it's even worse: the people I see in the office are all part of a different team(s), the one(s) I'm not working with at all. So, all the interaction is maybe in the kitchen while pouring some...|||FWIW, one INTJ once told me that I wasn't the kind of girl one falls in love with right away, but the more he got to know me, the more he liked me. I think he meant that I was OK looking, but he...|||I really don't need to remember names and faces for job, I stare at the computer screen all day. I associate people's email addresses and Skype avatars with what they want from me/I need from them. ...|||:exterminate:Totaally! :happy:  I think internets played a trick on me and ate the ending of my post. Gotta figure out what I actually wanted to say.|||I'm terrible with people's names and faces. I recently started a new job and I only work in the office 2-3 times a week. Most people in the office are doing the same, but their WFH days may be my...|||I sorta got the same impression. And this is why I agree with  @cutiepatootie. Your only way back to the relationship with her is through being friends first. I get a major red flag when you say you...|||This is very true, especially, about this specific INTJ. I think this dinner date felt very natural. I've been out to lunch or coffee with him before, and there was always a pause at some point,...'