'That is reasonable. I understand. That's a good explanation.   I wish my ESFJ girlfriend had the self-awareness to self-reflect and improve herself.   Sent from my Samsung Galaxy S5|||I am never around her guy friends. She is definitely loyal. I am 100% certain. I just don't understand why she has those perverted guy friends around her.  She said she never meets them in person...|||INTJ boyfriend here. My ESFJ girlfriend has gone through a lot of tragedies in her life. She used to have a group of close friends but her circle of close friends disbanded. Some broke off due to an...|||Maybe you do not understand yourself well enough, or do not express yourself well enough for others to achieve the correct understanding of you? People perceive and understood you differently?|||My ESFJ girlfriend tells me (INTJ) that I question things too much.  Also, I avoid asking her questions because she is sensitive about everything I ask and gets offended easily. Because she gets...|||I have an ESFJ girlfriend and I believe she is an immature and unhealthy ESFJ. It's difficult to convince them. They hold their own beliefs and opinions very strongly to themselves until proven wrong...|||I use my girlfriend as an example but it's not absolute. To generalize all ESFJs based on my one experience with my ESFJ girlfriend is a logical fallacy.   I just use my ESFJ girlfriend as an...|||Lakin   My ESFJ girlfriend has an emotional outburst too. She will become very verbally hostile towards me and reasoning is out of the question. She will go on and on and on, then she will walk...|||Never hurts to try. You should write a letter. To see someone else's handwriting potrays a person's effort and has a very personal touch.|||Exactly! This is why being around my girlfriend all the time is very draining with her negative comments. That's not her business. No one is going to act a certain way to accommodate her life.  Her...|||With him stonewalling, and us here just judging with speculation is not absolutely. You can try to approach him and find out exactly why he is stonewalling from the very source itself.  Go get...|||My scores are different because I answered differently. Of course. That is a given. Answering the questions affect the scores.  Why did I answer the questions differently before and now? What...|||On other tests, I tested to be INTJ and in the past I have tested to be INTJ many times.  I believe I have improved and changed as a person so my scores are different.   MY results below:  Te...|||olias provided really useful information.  I just do not think my ESFJ girlfriend is a mature ESFJ enough to be rational.  But I will try. I don't want you to feel like I'm dismissing your...|||I strongly agree.  When I am outside walking around with my ESFJ girlfriend, she loves to point out the most insignificant details in public.  Here are some of her remarks:  1) Oh god. Look at...|||I have an ESFJ girlfriend and I am an INTJ and sometimes my girlfriend and I clash due to our personality types.  Convincing my ESFJ girlfriend is very difficult because she holds onto her pride,...|||If you want to be with this person, then you should persuade him or her regardless what anyone tells you in this thread as long as you are aware of both the positive and negative outcomes.  :)|||I tried to explain this to my ESFJ girlfriend but she does not understand my perspective.  ESFJs are hyper sensitive and do not take criticize likely. My ESFJ girlfriend is very sensitive and...|||Klaro26  I have some examples. Let's say you are going out with your significant other, friends, or yourself, do not plan where to go eat. Wing it. When you are going to a mall, do not plan what...|||That's a good scenario. Very good information and very accurate.  I guess as an INTJ, I see everything realistically, and when I act as a sounding board to my ESFJ girlfriend, I feel that I am...|||This was during the heat of the moment and she acts this way towards everyone around her and even strangers. When expose to this kind of behavior towards her every week, it becomes draining and...|||I was just speaking to my ESFJ girlfriend on the phone.  She was telling me a story and she said to her friend Jeez. Don't you know anything other solutions that I haven't tried to fix my phone? ...|||olias  I used to have Netflix but I will try to stream it or Torrent the movie, Bridezillas, for a better understanding hah.|||ESFJs are definitely sensitive about their intellectual ability. In the beginning of the relationship, I would always point this and that out about her and she would hate it. I can confirm that she...|||I agree with Mithril. She gave the same response in the INTJ thread about INTJs and relationships.    She does come off as rude. What Mithril mentioned earlier when he was on-topic was debatable....|||These were my results:  You scored 70.833 out of 100 masculine points, 66.667 out of 100 feminine points, and 66.667 out of 100 androgynous (neutral) points  ================  Masculinity:...|||Off Topic:  devoid I really dislike the way you respond to people on this forum which is irrelevant to the topic of discussion because I do agree with your thread.  You do not seem very keen to...|||I agree with this. I am INTJ and I have re-evaluated myself many times.  I believe it depends on what the person is going through and how the person grew up by nature.  As an INTJ back in my high...|||I do not think about death because I have no control of it but I do have control of minimizing my chances of dying early.  I do care about my girlfriend so I do want to stick around as possible and...|||Speak no words. Simply just bolt into action and show her that you care by actions. Words may not reach an ESFJ. I can only speak from my experience when my ESFJ girlfriends begins to isolate herself...|||Whoops. I realized that I am on the ESTJ forum and not the ESFJ forum.  *response deleted*|||I can only speak from experience with my ESFJ girlfriend.  When my ESFJ girlfriend does not want to talk about something and I raise the awareness of a concern I had, her response is usually ignore...|||I believe there is a misunderstanding from both parties. I am not choosing sides here.  I have no intention to disrespect any of you.  Some of you INTJs offer your suggestions or advice to ...|||I am currently in a relationship with an ESFJ female. She stonewalls or isolates herself away from me on many occasions. Also, there was another person on this forum that created a thread about an...|||I believe this varies from different INTJs.  I can only speak from my perspective, I feel that speaking to other ESFJs is a good way for me to gain a better understanding because I find ESFJs as...|||My ESFJ girlfriend has the same response. When I confront her, she will feel hurt and upset as if I am attacking her when I only want to address an issue in our relationship that is bothering me. I...|||I feel that you two find common ground because you two are extroverted. My girlfriend loves history and she enjoys going to historical places and museums. I go to these museums with her, but she...|||I have tried to explain to her why I use psychology too to gain a better understanding. She argues Psychology and logic cannot explain everything. I justify by telling her Psychology is not...|||My ESFJ is an artsy person. She paints, enjoys music, loves history and visiting historical places.  She hates when I talk about psychology. Everything to her is about feelings and living through...|||I am glad that she is not the only woman out there that was raised like a proper lady.  No no. The man does help his woman, but he must immediately turn around for her to adjust herself to look...|||Klaro26  I have no clue where to start. I remember trying to be more lay back and it worked but eventually I became too late back and unproductive. It's definitely draining but I guess I prefer my...|||Do all ESFJs dress super refined and beautiful?|||My greatest fears are:   Being unsuccessful in the future  Cannot provide for myself and significant other  Losing my significant other|||I understand INTJ and ESFJ is a bad pair for a relationship, but I guess I am just being hopeful.  What can an INTJ and ESFJ talk about or hold a conversation about?|||I cannot tell you what is going on her head, but I can only speak from my experience with my ESFJ girlfriend. My ESFJ girlfriend usually tells me It's okay. It's fine when she wants to be alone or...|||devoid  I am going to admit that some of these INTJs are a bit harsh to you. They say INTJs are supposed to be the mastermind, but I understand you came here for advice. Judging and criticizing...|||Tone of voice definitely affects how an ESFJ will perceive a message. They reason with emotional reasoning. How a message is presented and communicated to them may be the deciding point on how they...|||I wish she does understand the importance of establishing a mutual understanding when we have our differences, but she is very stubborn. Even though she tells me I just let it go and move on. Like...|||I do feed her Fe all the time but showing her that I care by going out my way taking a 1-hour and 30-minute train ride to her house to deliver flowers to her. I go out and run errands for her too. ...|||Yep. I have shown her my MBTI and she said Wow. This does sound like you. But she is not into logic and psychology because I used it way too much in relationship to justify our differences. Now she...'