'Klopik:  Thanks for the necro.  I usually don't hang out here because of the treatment you got after nicely responding to something I wrote.  I used to think that all INTJs were like the loving, kind...|||From the other side, yeah, it can hurt when an INFP acts like they like random acquaintances and strangers more than a close friend when you are the close friend.  And it does feel like the standards...|||Aelthwyn, thanks for your reply.  I have been doing a lot of searches for INFP understanding on PerC recently, and your posts have been helping me with understandings, even from years ago.  Something...|||Thank you for a thought-provoking response.  What you say really goes deep into it.  Unfortunately, I can no longer get away with the just listen rephrase thing.  We are close-close for over a decade...|||Sorry for the misunderstanding, potato.  I really appreciated you talking to me.  It does mean a lot to have someone read what you are going through and respond.  So thank you.|||Hope you are not being too serious here.  I am feeling sort of horrible and it would suck for the first response to my post to be that I have a big ego.  My understanding is that the significant...|||Thanks.  I just wish bitter didn't have to be one person against the world because I feel shut out.  Maybe I am subconsciously uncomfortable being someone who the bitter part is against.  Probably...|||Hi, everyone.  I am feeling sad tonight.  My INFP is half bitter and half happy-bunny, and I am completely happy-bunny.  I don't relate to the bitter part because I am a fairly extreme optimist.  I...|||Yes, Bethdeth, it has been an interesting chat.  Here is what I have learned about myself.  As an INTJ with enneagram one, I am completely values driven and see everything in terms of values, so I...|||Bethdeth, why do you care about what I think or feel?  I don't have emotions towards you.  I don't have emotions towards anyone here except for gratefulness that I have gotten amazing information...|||I wasn't making a point.  I converse occasionally with antiant and she talks to me about her value system when I ask.  She admits publicly that she does things that go against the status quo in terms...|||Bethdeth, stop.  I have no issues with anyone.  If you don't understand my posts, don't read them.  They are about sociology and not about calling anybody out for anything.  Everyone here takes...|||Bethdeth, try taking what I have said without judgment behind it, in neutral.  You are acting like antiant cares what others think of her behavior here.  She doesn't.  Obviously antiant is not doing...|||No, I was referring to a very extreme post by antiant where she said we were basically all fluff, that no one here was able to carry an intellectual discussion, that we were all a joke and she was...|||Crono, why are you arguing for the sake of arguing?  It gets draining.  First of all, your point when you came in seemed to be that most of the INTJs here who were saying they took a realist view...|||I liked that post because you went much farther than usual in your usual riding of the line between am I criticizing you or joking, which are components of sarcasm that every INTJ enjoys plus ruling...|||I have noticed this, and I have heard you say that you are only kidding when someone is offended, but in my mind, I imagine that you are maybe kidding and maybe not, and how you determine this is...|||This is such an indulgent load of narcissist self-aggrandizement put into an area that nobody dares can touch out of fear of not being politically correct, defending one's country and doing heroic...|||Pam, I think from past posts it seems that most INTJ women tend to go for overachievement but have an unusually low competition drive, unless you want to call competing with yourself competition. ...|||Welcome, hi.  I wouldn't do it.  I would get a book and read up on how to use psychology to get a promotion.  Find ways to delegate that sound good to your boss, create systems that make your work...|||The concept of introversion is confusing.  I don't lose energy from being with people.  I just lose energy from socializing.  I get energy talking with people about ideas.  Socializing is like...|||Agreed.  It's like my motivation is tied up into my energy level, and if the energy drops, I can't function.  I always think when I get time off I am going to finally do a good job on things , but I...|||I think it is even less than 15.  But I totally agree.  And the percent that I want to hang out with is a fraction of that.  I am usually just working my ass off to mentally keep the numbers above...|||I had over a year of major financial decrease, and I am greedy and it really depressed me.  I found out I was horrible at less work.  I actually felt more tired.  I need the focus of lots of work to...|||Got it.  Flora is extremely dignified as a feeler.  She has her feelings but decides when to show them.  So that is more balanced.  Heart turned to porcelain is similar.|||Thanks.   Okay.  I have to say, the people I meet irl have no idea what mbti is, and they are behaving exactly like those on this forum. One firm owner is 53, another is mid 50 s, some of them are...|||This isn't really an INTJ-specific question, just something I want to ask those who are more knowledgable of MBTI.  I guess I still don't believe that all functions are equally preferable, and I may...|||After this explanation, I completely agree with this rant, with one minor difference.  People should not always have their hormones taken into account.  Instinct-driven behavior that causes harm,...|||That depends on the definition of selfish.  There is a scale and at one end is selfish and the other generous.  Some types believe that if a person is not well into the generous side, they are by...|||It is very funny that we are as impossible to read with the mask as without.  In fact, people do better with a mask, because the only way they know how to read someone is by calculating the mask in,...|||Sanskrit, are you sure you are not just referring to INTJ enneagram 5s?  As a one I am understandable and readable to my close friends and would never show them a mask.  INFPs are capable of reading...|||Crono, I have never taken logic and have never done a logic problem.  People don't need formal education to understand this.  It is the basics of human communication.  You have a disagreement with...|||First I want to say that I appreciate and understand what muchaparadox said.  And Loyalgirl, I suppose what disturbed me was not the idea of you doing these terrible things, but that feelers could...|||Of course there are exceptions in the F world.  And if you say you are one, Loyalgirl, I will take your word for it.  The only reason I have thought that F's stood for bonding, caring and putting...|||Actually, I was trying to be diplomatic in my choice of words.  I know very well how F's use manipulation, back-stabbing and the purposeful ripping apart other people's self esteem, and I am well...|||This has helped me clarify a whole handful of complaints about INTJs.  What you are being told is that the construct of your argument is invalid.  No one is saying they are right and you are wrong,...|||I would take it perhaps one step further.  When Aelthwyn says, Even when they may 'look down on' our emotional responses, that doesn't mean they don't still value us as a person, I would add that...|||I really like how you wrote it, style-wise, and it gave us a good understanding.  I can appreciate slight exaggeration for clarity.  I get it now.    However, the ease at which you talk about...|||Loyalgirl, really nicely written post and very clear and insightful.  But it leaves me confused.  You paint the world of a feeler in such combative terms.  You say criticism is used for...  and...|||Teddy:  The one thing that I think this thread hasn't addressed much, though, now that I think about it, is...how does one spot true arrogance?  ...|||I see the real problem as one of different values.  People have different needs in terms of communication.  Very heavy mental people often like to exercise their minds, and they are really looking...|||Arrogance in the way it is used here is really a label for something more.  It means you are ignoring, or worse, are unaware of the social rule that we do not make others feel uncomfortable by...|||I recognize your intentions to be very good.  However, if you want those around you to be the best version of themselves, the only healthy way to get these results is to recommend/finance a...|||Yes, that kind of talk is useless.  It is nauseating.  I would run far, far away if anyone said any of those quotes to me.  They are a Hallmark card, a parody.  I can easily say, Excellent...|||The standard method of teaching is not workable.  It's reprehensible.  If you have to teach concepts, you need to use very, very interesting methods that will at least shock them.  Use highly...|||Well, that's pretty hard then.  Going on dates is hugely important to relationship health, but normal dates would be pretty awful for an INTJ.  Usually mental things work better, museums,...|||No, it's fine.  A lot of INTJs do not recognize the power imbalance of an established group versus a newcomer.  Unfortunately the message being sent ends up being if you can take the hazing at the...|||You should be able to keep her out of the enmeshment long distance.  Basically this would consist of letting her tell you what her mother said/did and reenforcing that your mother is wrong and that...|||40 5 19 9 37 34 0 24 12|||I understand the natural love we have for our closest, and also the ability to show that you recognize the things that you don't care about but you know they do, such as getting them a gift that they...'