I like to feed people and cuddle :P|||I focus on doing anything to 'make it easier on them' when really I want to just avoid everything and everyone and go and hide until I'm in enough emotional control of how I appear to other people...|||I think you need to consider your methodology. Internet forums tend to be weighted towards night owls. Not just for sociological reasons, but also physiological ones - the light from a computer...|||Peter Gilly Happy about Nothing. (your username is sad, this video could make you happy  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Qx9Zojmb_I )   For my two cents, I think NTJs and NFJs are similar in the...|||Tonight has been quite a lonely, strange sort of night. Much like the soft chords I strum out on the guitar each time I get here, I don't feel I'm making much progress towards any kind of resolution...|||What kind of rejection was it? Explicit and romantic, probably not. If they just faded away into the background, they might give you an explanation if you assure them it's safe to do so.|||Talk and tea is such an easy way to snare xNFJs :P Especially with new people, chat and tea feeds our Fe and Se in a really pleasant way. Also, the combination of intimacy and relaxing tea make it...|||This isn't really related to type. There is a strong bias against multiple partners in most cultures and an even strong bias against lying to people and hurting their feelings in pretty much all of...|||In terms of what I'm all about, my main trains of thought are usually to do with observations about the people around me and how they feel, or trying to work out how I am appearing, how I am being...|||Me and bae on choir tour in the USA a month or two ago. It's me on the left (unfortunately!). Some of the girls in choir find taking pictures of us really amusing because he's 10 inches taller than...|||Meeehhh. I feel like my head is full of sand and I can't think straight. Just missed a deadline big time, and I don't really care because what is actually on my mind is a girl who I can't figure out....|||I've played various instruments. I often give them up if I feel like I'm never going to be amazingly good at them.  Right now, I'm focused on singing. I'm good enough that sometimes I get paid, but...|||Sometimes I'm very aware of my Ni processing as I keep following a train of thought. Often I'll catch myself wondering something like 'How would I describe the people around me in 2 sentences? How...|||I am generally open with my friends and loved ones when I think they're doing something stupid. Some of them take it well, some people months later still don't treat me as before and probably never...|||Baking for people always makes me feel warm inside. And mmmm dough smell|||I very much can be if I think someone's making a big mistake. Sometimes I'm wrong about it, often I'm right - but I forget that stuff like that is much more of a disaster for someone hyper conscious...|||I would actually say that typically ENFJs can struggle a bit to pinpoint their feelings. Fe is concerned with the outer world of emotions, the emotions of other people. Surface expressions, such as...|||Ever feel like you're in a bubble when you're with a group? Or behind thick glass?   (Apparently Sylvia Plath likened her depression to being in a bell jar, a container with nothing inside.) ...|||Oh loneliness hits me like a freight truck sometimes. It's not just the frequency of social interaction that ENFJs enjoy, I think we're also hyper sensitive to the quality of our social interaction....|||I like to have at least one day or a few evenings to myself in a week with the phone off doing my thing.|||Not exactly new but never introduced myself!  What fucks me up in a bad way: everything I tell myself I should be or should be doing What fucks me up in a good way: Seamus Heaney poetry, playing C...|||Oh I very much have this problem. ENFJs make everyone feel loved and understood, as for the most part we do love and understand. Unfortunately people don't realise that ENFJs are really aware of...|||Is it too much to ask that someone could fucking know me? Least of all me.|||I think the existence of a 12 page thread is fairly good evidence we're hard to read. Both XNFJs are well known as being emotional fort knox. That Fe-Ni or Ni-Fe combination means in practice that we...|||That's cool to think about. I want intimate, close, deep relationships with everyone that I decide to like, but not at the cost of being vulnerable. I actually hold quite a lot of people deliberately...|||I'd join some painfully bad amateur hockey/rugby/soccer teams. In terms of feeling instantly connected to people, sports and music (particularly singing) are definitely the best.|||Yahh.... I was just thinking about this an hour ago and realised I totally mangled that. Fe-Ni is still a strong combo for verbal reasoning, I think people don't see it that way usually because Fe is...|||ENFJs have a dispostion towards great verbal reasoning and debating skills in their cognitive functions. Ni-Te helps you to analyze and break down the arguments of other people and structure your...|||Hey there. I've not found it easy to type myself. Forced dichotomy tests are often not that helpful because I associate with both sides of the spectrum - like I said, I find I instinctually mediate...|||Sometimes it's not as obvious as that. ENFJs can hold themselves to high standards because they think they are obligated to do it because of their superiority. ENFJs can also appoint themselves as...|||I wonder if I'm the only ENFJ here who actually avoids relationships? I like sex and intimacy, and being close to people, but my experience of being in romantic relationships has been one of...|||It's not like I need people to tell me I'm great, but if people are clear they want me around that makes me pretty happy. And then if you let me cook for you I'm humming :P|||Unhealthy ENFJs get preoccupied with being marginalized because of their unique capabilities and talents, with a not unremarkable dose of paranoia. ENFJs could easily do the wrong thing if they think...|||xNFJs are rarely inclined to be open because they feel there are things about them or thoughts they have that are undesirable or not useful in the current social context so just get suppressed (and...|||Ohhhh yeah. :(  ENFJs draw people in through their natural warmth. They seem to love everyone - in part because they act like they do and mask their true feelings if they really don't like someone...|||ENFJs tend to experience their internal emotions from an oblique angle. They take us by surprise almost. I listen to a song and suddenly remember I listened to that song a lot during a tough period...|||Probably ENFJ is my feeling. ENFJs get shy when they're not sure of how they should act, especially 5s.|||I think this something people underestimate about us, especially ENFJs with a bit of enneagram 8 hovering around in their enneatype. ENFJs can be spiteful, but our agression usually manifests...|||Oh dear lord I'm bored of keeping it together for everyone.|||ENFJs are manipulative, but it's perhaps too strong a word for what they do. ENFJs modify their behaviour and public persona to be more successful in a given environment. Of course, success depends...|||Ahaha they do exist! But all of the Ni types are rare, and the Fe/Ni ones can be hard to spot because they adapt their behaviour to their surroundings. So the males can look a bit different to the...|||I get the impression you guys are young (like most of the people on this site - by young I mean 15-23 ish ish ish it really depends). Young or immature ENFJs are much more unsettled in terms of...|||I totally feel you Shelk. Fe is both crappy at introspecting and wonderfully externally inconsistent with our need to Fe mask at everyone so keeping it real gets very tricky, especially for us...|||Ahaha not at all surprised to see an ENFJ enjoying that game - I know I get a kick out of anything where I can make a self-representative character and then go do good in the world and forge...|||A lot of ENFJs, especially younger ones, aren't really sure who they are. We are generally focused on other people to the extent that we can be a bit of a mystery to ourselves. In the process of...|||I can point out that this question is philosophically flawed. For instance, 'because they're an elephant' would be a valid answer. You're asking for negative definition - ANY characteristic that...|||I might think the person has decided they don't want me around and back off. Or I'd feel hurt that this person rejected me, and cut them off equivalently (it's odd but that's how I deal with...|||Hey all,  I'm currently going through the process of a possible ADD diagnosis. I've been a daydreaming, non-stop talking walking bubble of chaotic disorganisation forever, and now I go to one of...|||More than possible. Skills are things you are constantly learning and practising, and socialising is no different.   For most of the time I was growing up (I'm only 20 now mind) I was horrendous at...|||I have a habit of impulsively going along with it if people show physical or emotional interest in me. As you can imagine, it leads to some very unsatisfying situations but I am just really bad at...