Thanks for assuaging my fears!   Guess ive seen my ISTJ dad chase away enough friends to think it might happen to me too.    Curious, any of you guys feel this way?|||Good idea. The good news is that they do know i like my space. But i'm just worried because, being my first experience, i wouldn't know when i need to recharge. I tend to get grumpy, i've noticed.|||Fellow ISTJ's, i have an odd question.   In dec, i'll be traveling with 2 friends of mine (they're a couple) for a total of 16 days. During which, our accommodations will be apartments so there's...|||A little late to the party. But here's mine. We dated for a while.   Dislikes:   Stubbornness, is a completely opposite way we are. We are stubborn about how there's usually a 'best way' to do...|||Yes, i'm going to have to agree with you on this, having been on the receiving end before.  Though, if they're talking to you, it's always a good sign.|||Workplace.   The first one had numerous (if not all) characteristics of INTPs, and members' analysis of her behavior confirmed my assessment. The second one was pretty similar to the first.|||Unwittingly.|||Don't worry, i'm not condemning all INTPs, or even any INTPs.   I'm just feeling a little ranty. And sad, about getting rejected again.|||One year after getting my heart broken by an INTP, and i find myself dating another INTP.   I wish this one had a happier ending, but i just got the 'i don't think things will work out in the long...|||So, do INFJs jump straight into dating?   Or do they prefer the whole 'let's be friends first' song and dance?   Though i can't say for sure if attraction is there at this point.|||I know it will help when talking to try to get straight to the point.   And personally, if i found someone annoying, i'll avoid them. I won't tell them they were annoying.   Source: Dated an ENFP.|||Heh, you really do know how to talk to ISTJ's. This is exactly what i'm looking for. Thanks a million! And good luck with your istj.|||Yes, silly me. That would've been an important detail to include.   No, i don't work with her. We met at a casual social event via a mutual friends, and they thought we might be compatible with...|||So recently i developed a crush on an INFJ.   But word on the street is that she's not looking for a relationship, and has submitted herself (looking forward to?) a life of singlehood due to some...|||I need help with an INTP.   Ok, i know this is a lost cause, and i'm prepared for the worse, but previously i was seeing an INTP, but i got too emotionally demanding and she called it off.   Now...|||Thanks for the replies.   I just can't seem to find a way to have a second chance, without outright telling her but doing that would just put more pressure on her and defeat the whole purpose.  ...|||I know this is a silly question, and i'm stupid for even asking.   But do you get second chances with an INTP?   I was previously dating one, and she decided to end things because she didn't...|||How they're so damn hard to get over.|||Rant: Hate how i always need things to be either black or white. Especially when it comes to relationships. Was dating this INTP lady for a while, and my need for clear definitions of our...|||It matters to me, because that lady broke my heart once when she ended things, then once again when i saw how quickly she'd moved on. Guess i just hate being insignificant.      angelcat thanks...|||I'm pretty sure that's the case here too.   But doesn't mean it can't piss me off. ;)   Hence the decision to post in this thread.|||I hate how fast INTPs move on.   I'd recently ended a 'relationship' with one, and i seem to have lifted right out of her life.   It's like all the feelings we had, memories we shared, and good...|||When even your thread title seems cheerful.   Contrast this to the utilitarian ISTJ...   http://personalitycafe.com/istj-forum-duty-fulfillers/18542-you-know-youre-istj-when.html  When guys...|||Just chiming in to say, 300+ pages in the INTP relationship thread vs. 19 pages in the ENFP relationship thread.   Clearly, relationships with ENFP's are less complicated. Keep up the good work...|||I troll people i like and trust, people whom i know won't take offense.   I usually have a very serious and stoic face, so everything i say sounds serious. Only close friends would know i was...|||I'm interested to know the answer too!|||Well, in this case she hasn't mentioned wanting to end things so far. And we've been seeing each other since then. So i'm really hoping it's just that she needs space.   And you're asking an ISTJ...|||Thanks,  Iamtp and  AijA for the advice.   I'm talking about ~4 texts and 1 unanswered phone call over a span of a week and a half. Usually, i can take a hint pretty well, but we've been dating...|||If an INTP has decided to ignore me, she won't agree to go out with me right?   I'm asking because last week it really felt like i was being ignored by her intentionally. Calls go unanswered, texts...|||I need help!!  So i've been seeing this INTP for a while now, and got her to admit she has feelings for me.   But she just told me that she 'is convinced our relationship won't work out', 'has...|||Though i'm not an INTP, but i do notice they have a thing about contact. The INTP i've been dating has never touched me, and her default reaction to me touching her is to shrug it off, and then i'll...|||Hey all, just an update about my situation.   To recap:  - Dating an INTP for about 6 months now.  - Been going well, though she seems to been acting really withdrawn lately - On dates she's...|||Need help again with my INTP.   How will i know if an INTP is withdrawing because she needs space vs. withdrawing because she no longer wants to be part of this (dating) relationship?   I've been...|||For me it's more of stress and helplessness. Indirectly, a loss of control. Never in public though. And only if i allow myself. So i suppose 'gracefulness' depends on how strongly i wish to feel it. ...|||He will - find some ways to 'run into' you and maybe make a funny quip or two.  - look at you when you're not looking - observe what you like and find an appropriate (ie, not creepy) opportunity...|||Also, if i recognize the face but can't place it in the right context, it'll bug me the whole day.|||Oh? Would that help? I did sorta hint to her that i missed having her do that, but i guess i forgot hinting to INTPs are pointless. I'll do a more direct approach next time.   I hope that wasn't...|||Thanks,  Mschievious, for those reassuring words and well wishes!  She did admit a couple of weeks back that she had feelings for me. Though her behavior after having done that makes me wonder.  ...|||Have you tried directing your Pness elsewhere?   Sometimes it's the J that's the problem. My Pness seems to fit in everywhere.   Sure, some J's are less accommodating than others, but it's...|||Well, outbursts aren't necessarily bad, it helps clear the air. While being stubborn and judgemental are seldom a good thing.   Update about my situation, i brought it up the other day, but she...|||Yes! Very much so.   I assumed it was an ISTJ thing that we would connect the dots of our memory and lead to recollecting.   Sometimes it takes me longer, but i do sometimes wonder where i've...|||Well, i haven't had the chance, though i plan to. In the most offhanded, by-the-way tone i can muster. Though at this point i have at least steeled myself for the worst possibility, so i won't break...|||Thanks guys.   I doubt it was something i did. Last i saw her, i had just sent her home from work, and gave a her kiss goodnight, as usual. We did have a pretty awkward and quiet trip home though,...|||I've been dating an INTP, and i have a major complaint:   Their ability to rationalize their way out of a relationship, and then withdrawing with nary a word.   Some background (cliff notes) - ...|||Thanks for taking the time to respond to my question! Really appreciate it. And sorry for putting you on the spot.   Detachment, eh? Well, easier said than done, but i will try my best. As for...|||Thanks for that! Though you switched pronouns halfway through your response. You meant that she's the one who 'stuck herself in a vulnerable situation' right?  How will i know when she's done...|||Half full.   Because we always have backup plans, and backup plans in case our backup plans fail.|||I think ladies have it better. Even introverted guys will somehow find the courage to initiate if they're interested.   I've never known an introverted lady to initiate anything in the very early...|||Once a week sounds fine to me, 'too eager' would be everyday. I think pressure stems from content of the message than frequency though.  Question for INTPs: Is it normal for an INTP to withdraw...|||Well, i don't know how often you initiate contact, but for me, i text her (my INTP) every other day. Sometimes we manage to back and forth till she sleeps (but very long intervals between messages),...