'I do not understand ISTJs. I can't find a way into their mindset, as if their reality lies behind a waterfall made of black diamonds.   (I have a co-worker which is the most fitting description of...|||last Sunday was my 40th birthday. I baked 2 chocolate cakes for my co-workers. my co-workers who came later to work told me, the cake was already eaten by the earlier-colleagues. I felt such guilt...|||I still hope I find my Virginia somewhere out there...   https://youtu.be/x1N7wWK3f6E|||today I became this guy and I am okay with it   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vn3IRHhPXMo|||http://youtu.be/6vImyP5EYc8|||I should not have written her. Its 27 hours later and there is no answer. Well, thats it. After 9 years I tried to connect to someone, after 9 years of being nothing, I wanted to be someone, again. I...|||https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kijpcUv-b8M|||My shadow Si is running like hell right now.  I wrote in the venting thread about the woman I re-met after 25 years from my school class and I am not able to know, if I suddenly have a crush on her...|||when I start something, I tell myself: I just do it...  and suddenly, I start to fight to become the best; but this is only working at work and it is all about numbers (phone time,...|||I am working towards Jungs synchronicity theory  and pondering a certain woman I met yesterday and suddenly a song appeared in my mind, and then I read the lyrics  ...|||I am very sorry for this longer text, but ... I just can't not have written it down...  I just have to write it...  I believe, I truly met the most... powerful-true-beautiful in the world (for...|||I did the test many years ago, sadly I dont find my (german) result anymore. it was like Problem solver  today I am   Steadiness (39) Compliance (32)  Influence (17)  Dominance (13)  Darn,...|||I dont want money for its own sake. I just want time to do, what I dream of. I work every day very hard and find a light at the end of a tunnel. and I want this outfit and rum. and a beach house and...|||I am obsessed with money and I cant hold it. I like accounting and on the other hand, I lent it to people, I give it away... and I am struggling. Its almost a mind-cancer (for me). My dreams are not...|||I found out that Tom Hardy is 5 days younger than me. and I, guilty of uncontrolled envy, am raging right now and asking, what I have done wrong in my life. there is no solution.|||yeah, thats me^^ kind of.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjvdv-sTM2U  I know, the walk is a long one... I walk it freely, despite I dont believe in success. Stopping would be worse and would...|||broke, alone, working hard, getting nowhere... and then there are the winners who tell you, the only thing you have to do: never giving up. for them its the magical habit, the guarantee to success....|||things I can control: more writing. less drinking. things I cant control: less stress and less work, more money, sex|||I am uncomfortable. I have a colleague who has a crush on me... with a twist: MAYBE... she has a crush on me. She stands next to my place at work often, just hoping that I see her and talk to her and...|||last night I dreamed being asked out by a colleague. I did know her, but not in real life. it was a nice moment. then I woke up.   being alltime single I feel 99% of the time okay. I have a purpose...|||i find myself in a state of cold fury. its not fury, I believe, because I dont feel anything. its just not existent at this moment.  went to a company xmas party. there were prices (luck) and...|||had a crush an a colleague, never lost it really. she has a kind of bizarre relationship with a 20 year older colleague. it was okay, until she started to started appearing at my desk before work and...|||why are they saying, that the alternatives to drink alcohol are either not-tasting like it (chemical) or they are some magical longterm habits you have to work to get it done (non-chemical)....|||I often feel the most envious person in the world. I suppose, thats a kind of deadly sin... and I feel bad for feeling that way, its like a sickness...|||Hi,  I am looking for a few recommendations of selfhelp books without the the universe will take care of you magic.  I often found out, that many books have a certain The secret to self...|||I wrote 559 words in 5 hours today :)|||zapping through tv, bad teacher is running, the diaz-helps-pupil-to-become-accepted-scene. a sudden rage/anger in my heart about never had anyone in my life helping me while i was unaccepted in...|||yesterday after work I went with a colleague to a party. it was an opening party. there was beer. and afterwards I bought kebabs for my colleague and myself. this evening was meaningless. a waste of...|||good or bad habit with money... family related topic? the struggle with spending too much with too much bs and knowing, that your parents are the same (mostly) and still struggling with money... -.-|||I am scared of Infinite Jest. Like other books with have a certain fandom or an almost religious following... a this is the best book ever-vibe, I am scared of either being too dumb or too...|||https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdMXMmUNaK8|||I am in the middle of struggling with rationality. because world is irrational. 100% of selfhelp-books are wrong or at least full of you can do it. and success is struggle and work and you will...|||I am not that jealous, I would like if many people had enough money. I just want a little island for myself and enough food and drink and internet and paper for 10-15 years o.O|||being GRRMartin, JKRowling or SKing. or Salinger, Pynchon or... insert writer with a very fanatic fangroup.   (or maybe being Coupland, Houellebecq or Ellis...)|||https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nC2gZMNkyJo|||people with simple solutions to giant questions of life. mostly very successful people which partially ignore the epic portion of luck they had. people who believe the same, because they believe hard...|||a person here in germany won 84 million euros in the lottery. wow. and I am hanging here at home over my accounting and at work again restructures like 6 months ago. life sucks.|||a little  bit Rum/Pepsi (the Appletons :) ) and suddenly Smallville becomes a very nice tv show :)|||I am happy or so.  met a buddy from the net from another board in berlin, in a pub. free beer and food and he brought a couple of books he did not need anymore (8!), I did not own (Terry...|||I usually like living in busy environments, the vibe and energy are good and then to go back to my solitude and harvest my thoughts ^_^|||Stranger Things is just wonderful. Music is brilliant, cast is very good, script awesome :D   ==  Venting:  Dear Berlin. I am living inside your walls for the last 12 years. I like many things...|||Steve Jobs, the biography  very interesting. a brilliant madman with many flaws, an obsessed and everchanging focus-person. I would have not liked or worked with him... :O|||and because its 80s thursday for me: If one brilliant ever directs my unpublished book Neonflesh, I want this song in the first scene. because its brilliant.  ...|||today I listen to a nice Filtr US 80s Playlist ^^  at this moment:   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIgZ7gMze7A|||watching Blacklist right now and there was this brilliant monologue :3 I sometimes contemplate (sorry) suicide, seldom, but its there, because I feel so disappointed with life and being unsuccessful...|||the concept of normal is not the same for all people. and there are many people, myself included, having sometimes thoughts of death. In my childhood I was scared of death and over the years, it...|||nah, its symbolic artist-special money  ;O|||INFJ,  Your score was 27 out of a possible 50. Scores in the 26 - 32 range indicate some Autistic traits (Aspergers Syndrome).   See how your score compares with others, or visit our...|||I believe, writer's block is the consequence of too much thinking. mostly, I just try to write something. stupid stuff... works.   I am sad for being de-friended of a person on facebook for...|||its not whiny, its a fun-question^^  Hi,  I am selling my little works on amazon as ebooks and get usually 10-15 euros every 3 months... so its not worthy a big thought, but I ask myself: what...'