'I don't know, I miss my ex a lot... Sometimes I do wonder how they re doing and just want to make sure they are okay... but I think some time later you have to reach out to her if you want her back,...|||takkenne, you are so right about this. I remember so much about all the hurtful words my ex said about me... even text messages from my first ex 7 years ago! Words hurt a lot indeed:/|||Don't have much to value add but just wanted to say Enicma you are not alone.   I am struggling to be a heathy ENFJ after a breakup but it has just been spiralling down, or maybe ups and downs... and...|||Really? Tbh I don't think it's really a happy life for all of us. I think many ENFJs are struggling a lot with regards to their lives, but they tend to not bring it out when others seek advice from...|||W122 Hey dear, thank you so much for your kind words. Means a lot to me knowing there are people in the same boat although Id never wish for this to happen onto anyone else. Hugs...:/    I...|||BNB and your girlfriend has been okay with your opinion on marriage? Just curious.|||Even when the feelings let's say romantically, are with someone whom you've opened up and really would never ever hurt you. Like you can be vulnerable with that person?|||Gilly thanks:) Thats the thing you see, especially when your ex is a freaking ISTP who.. is successful in repressing feelings and avoidance. It makes you feel like you're the only one in this... I...|||TheTechMan haha sorry, well I started a thread about my situation but long story short: timing and circumstances and being in different locations.|||TheTechMan if it's due to circumstances?|||I cry buckets when I am misunderstood, angry, depressed, or just anticipatory grief even.|||I agree with you, I think he might be more selfish than the personality thing resulting in his decisions. Thanks!|||I have been reading your entries about ENFJ.. and I am really appreciative of how much research you had done and you sharing the knowledge with us! I'm a ENFJ, type 2, instinctual sexual 2 I think......|||Tamehagane I couldn't find much about Fe-Ni focus, could you explain?:/    I do! I went out to hike alone (but felt more reassured when there are fellow hikers around me) and was in Nature the...|||Jawz No comparison at all. Just trying to suggest that sometimes it takes a long time but it eventually does get better.   No worries. I have had people compare their heartbreaks to mine and mine...|||Thank you Tamehagane ! It is very kind of you:)  Thing is I think I have developed some Ni actually.. it's true. I hate reading books... I mean I used to read a lot of books when I was young. Now...|||How do I develop my Ni or Ti?  I know, but tbh I just want to stop feeling love for this guy anymore... Hence the only thing I want to do is just to shut off feelings for everyone because I can't...|||THANKS @JAWS ! It's been 3 months though.. my appetite dropped badly... I actually have nothing I want to do though, which makes it all workse.. And people just disgust me now... being near them...|||I agree, people telling me that everyone goes through this, move on, you deserve better and stuff. But in actual fact, I say I am an unhealthy ENFJ, because I really lose all hope and feel that...|||Wonder how you are with your SO?  I was in a LDR FOR 1.5Years with my ISTP ex BF... We never met and (I'm also from Singapore) LOL. He broke up with me cos well circumstances and I think he thinks...|||Are you guys still together? ENFJ and ISTP pairing?|||I agree with you. It was extremely difficult throughout my relationship which ended with him leaving... but I felt like we both learnt a lot. Sadly it wasn't enough|||pwowq when they do think of people, would they focus more on the good or the bad? Would this thinking ever translate into regret/feeling of loss or OMG I want her back?|||Now, I might not know much to give as much insight, but from what I see of your post,  1. I'm sorry you were so badly hurt. Having someone you love/loved tell you that he couldn't have a connection...|||Okay... I am sorry I offended you lol. Wasn't stereotyping him but this is a forum for personalities, so...|||Haha well, I think it was unlikely hormones or excitement considering we were in a relationship for 1.5 years.    I thought about it, but he thinks I still do not understand. Maybe because of my...|||1418, Yes I agree with you.  I don't need an immediate answer, but it would be nice to not read my message unless he can reply.. or at least say he's busy.  I also agree with you that, perhaps he...|||1418,  Once again he read my message and the photo and did not reply. I am getting borderline annoyed? Like if he just wants to do this kind of ignoring, can't he just block me? Does he get a kick...|||1418 Thank you so much!:)  OH lol, so if I block him (since he blocked me on Facebook), would that piss him off/ make him more curious about me?  Oops sorry manipulative unhealthy ENFJ traits out|||Haha?Really, I don't think I will move on/find another. I would rather be single then. Not sure if it's an unhealthy ENFJ thing or obsession or whatever, I am really set on my thinking that if it's...|||1418, Thank you for replying!:)  I think I made a ENFx mistake by following up with a how are you? <- I know I just recalled and someone on the forum told me as well, that was a mistake. I merely...|||1418 , anyway I sent him a nice message saying I am sorry for how I acted before and after the breakup and that it was out of line even though I was hurting badly. I also apologised for not being...|||ENFJ feeling extremely worthless and suicidal and finds no meaning in life now post breakup with my ISTP ex-bf:(|||Ah oh man, really? Any advice is appreciated though, or thoughts! cursive|||1418 Yes you are right, he has unblocked me since the end of February after he imposed a 2 weeks no contact post breakup. He isn't speaking to me at all, i.e. not proactive in making conversation. ...|||1418, my situation I Guess, I have no idea where I stand in his life? (Or if he even wants to keep me around)|||motherofdragonslover hi!!! fellow GoT fan! (reminds me of how he introduced me ti GoT...)  Even though he had been a jerk in the relationship, I felt that we shared a strong emotional connection...|||Actually I don't really know. Do ISTPs not initiate conversation?  1418 Thank you:)|||cursive     Oh I am serious actually... you mean the bolded part? Because you asked I thought you had some advice to give!|||I got a bit confused at what you were trying to get at oops. But this was definitely not my fault the breakup. I wish it was, like I wished I had betrayed or cheated on him so I wouldn't feel so...|||I think I agree with the loud music example. But then no offence, my example of taking responsibility if you murdered someone, would be to make up for it, and not to just stop murdering?. Hmm,...|||I am a super unhealthy ENFJ post breakup right now. I feel hurt, scarred, betrayed, used, disgusted at myself and how human beings can be so selfish, angry, upset.  I blame myself for being naive...|||that is so horrible. Guys who cheat deserve nothing. Sometimes I wish my ex bf had cheated on me. It would have made it so much easier to move on than some stupid selfish reason like I want to work...|||You are! But I get super riled up hearing responses from ISTP users... :x    So what do you mean by emotional support? Oh wait, I also forgot to mention one really sweet thing he did... We have...|||I have been through heartbreaks before, it's nowhere like this. It feels like I am betrayed, abused, hurt, taken for granted, used...    you know I wish sometimes he was a complete jerk, that he...|||Maybe it's how different we are, it's ridiculous to me. I did nothing wrong and how dare he let his feelings fade, or string me along whatever if he never wanted to meet me. It's honestly ridiculous...|||pwowq er okay lol.|||haha sorry that I didn't seem to understand. So basically you're saying he appreciates me as a person, yet doesn't want me in his life?    okay I guess I was at fault... He blocked me on whatsapp...|||is it possible if you could teach me ways to go about that? Honestly, I really hate being a ENFJ, after this incident, I desperately want to be like you guys. ISTP. Not caring for the world, caring...|||Really? Because we actually talked about a lot things, like marriage, where to settle down (which country), dual income families or single income, things like how to manage finances, religion when we...'