Code change:
Hi! I performed a second AD review on draft-ietf-emu-eap-tls13. This time on -18. Thank you to the authors, the responsible co-chair, and the WG for all of the work to redesign the -13 protocol in response to the initial IESG review in December 2020. My review feedback consists of my own minimal additional comments and highlights of where previously stated IESG ballot items do not appear to be responded to or addressed. All items appear to be minor. ** Section 2.4. Previously, this text referenced TLS 1.3 or higher necessitating more ambiguous reference to version numbers. However, now the text only notes TLS 1.3. OLD When EAP-TLS is used with TLS version 1.3, the EAP-TLS peers and EAP- TLS servers MUST comply with the compliance requirements (mandatory- to-implement cipher suites, signature algorithms, key exchange algorithms, extensions, etc.) for the TLS version used. For TLS 1.3 the compliance requirements are defined in Section 9 of [RFC8446]. NEW When EAP-TLS is used with TLS version 1.3, the EAP-TLS peers and EAP-TLS servers MUST comply with the compliance requirements (mandatory- to-implement cipher suites, signature algorithms, key exchange algorithms, extensions, etc.) defined in Section 9 of [RFC8446]. ==[ COMMENT (Ben Kaduk) Section 2.1.4 The two paragraphs below replaces the corresponding paragraphs in Section 2.1.3 of [RFC5216] when EAP-TLS is used with TLS 1.3 or higher. The other paragraphs in Section 2.1.3 of [RFC5216] still apply with the exception that SessionID is deprecated. If the EAP-TLS peer authenticates successfully, the EAP-TLS server MUST send an EAP-Request packet with EAP-Type=EAP-TLS containing TLS records conforming to the version of TLS used. The message flow ends with the EAP-TLS server sending an EAP-Success message. If the EAP-TLS server authenticates successfully, the EAP-TLS peer MUST send an EAP-Response message with EAP-Type=EAP-TLS containing TLS records conforming to the version of TLS used. Just to walk through the various scenarios here; if the last message of the TLS handshake for a given TLS version is sent by the TLS client, that will go in an EAP-Response, so the server is then able to send EAP-Success directly. On the other hand, if the last TLS handshake message is sent by the server, that will have to go in an EAP-TLS EAP-Request, and so the peer will have to send an empty EAP-TLS response in order for the server to be able to wend EAP-Success? Do we need to have any text here to handle that empty EAP-TLS Eap-Request case? ==[ COMMENT(Alvaro Retana) Is the intention of the Appendix to provide additional formal updates to rfc5216? That is what it looks like to me, but there's no reference to it from the main text. Please either reference the Appendix when talking about some of the other updates (if appropriate) or specifically include the text somewhere more prominent. [Roman] As proposed above, please provide some forward reference. ==[ COMMENT (Éric Vyncke) I find "This section updates Section 2.1.1 of [RFC5216]." a little ambiguous as it the 'updated section' is not identified clearly. I.e., as the sections in RFC 5216 are not too long, why not simply providing whole new sections ? [Roman] I'd propose a simple fix by using (approximate phrases such as) either: This section updates Section xxx of [RFC5216] by amending it with the following text. (for the cases where the intent is to keep the existing text in rfc5216 but add this new text) This section updates Section xxx of [RFC5216] by replacing it with the following text. (for the cases where the intent is to replace an entire section in rfc5216) ==[ COMMENT (Éric Vyncke) None of us are native English speaker, but "e.g." as "i.e." are usually followed by a comma while "but" has usually no comma before ;-) [Roman] A simple s/e.g./e.g.,/ and s/i.e./i.e.,/ would catch this. Regards, Roman
==[ COMMENT (Éric Vyncke) None of us are native English speaker, but "e.g." as "i.e." are usually followed by a comma while "but" has usually no comma before ;-) [Roman] A simple s/e.g./e.g.,/ and s/i.e./i.e.,/ would catch this. Eric is correct that US english i.e. and e.g. is usually followed by a comma. I corrected this in d9f5028 I also run a word spell check on the document. Word does not suggest removing any comma after "but" but rather insert an additional comma after a but. I think this can be left to the RFC editor. The word spell check caught two other grammar errors (s after plural, no s after singular) RFC 8446 does not use capitalization on post-handshake as that is just a name for a set of messages. I corrected these things in
I Made a new PR
Made a commit with NEW When EAP-TLS is used with TLS version 1.3, the EAP-TLS peers and EAP-TLS servers MUST comply with the compliance requirements (mandatory- to-implement cipher suites, signature algorithms, key exchange algorithms, extensions, etc.) defined in Section 9 of [RFC8446].
Section 2.1.4 Changed the text to: The message flow ends with a protected success indication from the EAP-TLS server, follwed by an EAP-Response packet of EAP-Type=EAP-TLS and no data from the EAP-TLS peer, follwed by EAP-Success from the server.
I added a forward reference to the appendix in the introduction
NAME looks like you have got everything covered? are there any comments from Roman which still need to be addressed? should we submit a new version and ask for IETF last call?
I have tried to do everything. Problem with the updates thing. The replace or amend strategy does not really work.... [Roman] I'd propose a simple fix by using (approximate phrases such as) either: This section updates Section xxx of [RFC5216] by amending it with the following text. (for the cases where the intent is to keep the existing text in rfc5216 but add this new text) This section updates Section xxx of [RFC5216] by replacing it with the following text. (for the cases where the intent is to replace an entire section in rfc5216)
NAME We should likely not do to much changes. Maybe we can write something like Amends with the following text. TLS 1.2 specific details in RFC 5216 are replaced. Requirement in the new takes precedence over requirements in the old text.
This review was addressed in earlier submissions. closing

Related discussion:
text: If the EAP-TLS peer authenticates successfully, the EAP-TLS server MUST send an EAP-Request packet with EAP-Type=EAP-TLS containing TLS records conforming to the version of TLS used.  The message <del> flow ends with the EAP-TLS server sending an EAP-Success message. </del> <ins> flow ends with a protected success indication from the EAP-TLS server, follwed by an EAP-Response packet of EAP-Type=EAP-TLS and no data from the EAP-TLS peer, follwed by EAP-Success from the server. </ins> If the EAP-TLS server authenticates successfully, the EAP-TLS peer MUST send an EAP-Response message with EAP-Type=EAP-TLS containing