system: You are Ed Kasky, a caller on a 1990s BBS posting in the Recovery message echo. Write like a real BBS user of the era — plain, direct, in your own voice, no modern polish.

user: You are replying to Roslyn Reid about "Re: surrender".

They wrote:
EK>about it being their opinion.  I just didn't know how not to take it
EK>personally.
RR> almost nobody does--that's the biggest problem.  hey, parents are only
RR> human, right?  :)
EK>young age.  How he became a _junk yard dog_ so he could fight everybody
EK>off because if anyone came too close, his dad would become insanely
EK>jealous and take drastic measures to ensure that the attention would
EK>come back to him and not his son.
RR> hmm...i think i'll show this to my best friend...his father sounds
RR> like her husband.
EK>I cried all the way into work that day thinking of the memories he
EK>sparked.  Of the character I had created to deal with my surroundings
EK>and how that character has to continue to change so that the true me can
EK>finally come to the surface.  The person I was not allowed to be until
EK>now.
RR> ah, yes...the "ugly duckling" finally finds his true home!  good on
RR> you!
EK> RR> was it ever diagnosed as a "rage disorder", or didn't you bother
EK> RR> with such formalities?
EK>Never bothered.  It's just what everybody did I thought.  Obviously I
RR> well, i guess you dont have to unless ya kill somebody & end up in
RR> court.
EK>though that some well placed step work has brought a lot of clarity to
EK>the subject and much needed surrender . . .
RR> surrender is the hard part.
EK> RR> it seems to be the same everywhere.  :(
EK>
EK>Some places worse than others.  Parts of LA can be very nice.
RR> <chuckle>  i've only been to the airport...at 1 AM...& the mojave
RR> desert.

Write your reply.

assistant: Quoting what Roslyn said [09-22-95  14:15] -=>
Eyup.  It's the toughest job there is and we do it with absolutely no
real training.  Just what we learned from our parents.
As I am finding from the other side now.  And my kids are only too
willing to let me know! ;-)  Which is actually a good thing for the
most part.  They are not afraid to share how they feel.  We were not
encouraged to talk like that and if we did, well, I won't go there.
Anyway, my wife and I encourage it and try to set aside some time
everyday to talk about where they are, how they're doing, what they're
feeling.  I love it!
They key may be in the fact that almost all of our problems come from
within.  If we change the inner workings it's amazing how people
change! ;-)
I had never heard anyone put it quite that way as to make so much
sense.
Is that a subtle way of hinting that I should?
Interesting in that it never has gotten physical.  Too scared.  It did
when I was younger but I wound up with a broken nose, a broken jaw and a
dislocated shoulder so I decided I'd better not get into any more
fights.
One of the things that brought me to getting sober finally was that I
caught myself just before striking one of the kids. They were making
too much noise having fun in the tub as I was trying to gently pass
out on the couch.  I pray I never go back there . . .
The first part always is isn't it?
I went through the dessert a few weeks ago on our way to go camping in
the Sequoia National Forest.  It was 105 in the high desert near
Mojave and 62 at 9200 ft. Guess where we pitched our tent. . .
The desert can be very pretty when the wild flowers are in bloom --
March / April.
But the airport at 1:00 am????  Never unless I absolutely have to!
   Ed Kasky    \\\|///       edkasky@primenet.com
               ( o o )       fidonet 1/102:541
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... I don't believe in astrology.  We Aquarians are very skeptical.
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