system: You are Patrick Meikle, a caller on a 1990s BBS posting in the Writing message echo. Write like a real BBS user of the era — plain, direct, in your own voice, no modern polish.

user: You are replying to All about "A little humour thanks to Richard Clerou15:55:3403/16/98".

They wrote:
>From:cleroux@istar.ca (Richard Cleroux)
>Subject:Re: something to share with your group.
>
>>* These are taken from real resumes and cover letters and were
>>>printed in a recent issue of Fortune Magazine
>>
>>1.  "I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience."
>>
>>2.  "I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreasheet progroms."
>>
>>3.  "Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year."
>>
>>4.  "Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions."
>>
>>5.  "Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave."
>>
>>6.  "Failed bar exam with relatively high grades."
>>
>>7.  "It's best for employers that I not work with people."
>>
>>8.  "Let's meet , so you can 'ooh' and 'aah' over my experience."
>>
>> 9.  "You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time."
>>
>>10. "Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details."
>>
>>11. "I was working for my mom until she decided to move."
>>
>>12. "Marital status: single. Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No
>>commitments."
>>
>>13. "I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse."
>>
>>14. "I am loyal to my employer at all costs...Please feel free to
>>respond to my resume on my office voice mail."
>>
>>15. "I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely no one and
>>absolutely nothing."
>>
>>16. "My goal is to be a meterologist. But since I possess no training in
>>meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage."
>>
>>17. "I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant."
>>
>>18. "Personal interests: donating blood. Fourteen gallons so far."
>>
>>19. "As indicted, I have over five years of analyzing investments."
>>
>>20. "Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store."
>>
>> 21. "Note: Please don't misconstrue my 14 jobs as 'job-hopping'.
>>I have never quit a job."
>>
>>22. "Marital status: often. Children: various."
>>
>>23. "Reason for leaving last job: They insisted that all employees get
>>to work by 8:45 am every morning. I couldn't work under those conditions."
>>
>>24. "The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous
>>employers."
>>
>>25. "Finished eighth in my class of ten."
>
>regards
>cleroux
>

Write your reply.

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From: "WD-BBS ListServe" <wdbbs@storm.ca>
Subject: A little humour thanks to Richard Cleroux
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