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Go read this thread and tell me that the wife should be submitting to her husband.  Take your time and read the whole thing and then let me know what you think. 

Urban missionary I appreciate your point, yet I still don't change my position that "we don't have to live up to our Godly assigned duties because our mate doesn't is a slippery slope". 

A slippery slope is exactly what Satan is counting on and our lives are filled with all shades of gray between Black and White, and lets not forget the rainbow as well. 

Too many people are looking for an escape claus to fit their agenda.  Many women, christian women completely throw out the submission part.  They want to rule the house and their men.  This whole women's liberation went overkill.  it's all about power and control, and it's being used to attack our faith as Christians. 

I posted what I think & I pray it is of some usefulness to the situation. 

There are always repercussions to our actions, and we won't do everything right, bottom line, we are incapable, and will forever need Jesus's forgiveness of our sins, as well we need to forgive each other. 

I pray she comes out unscathed by the situation, because she can loose on both ends of this deal.  She could loose either her husband, son or both.  I even wonder if she can pray for widow's rights, because she is definitely alone in this deal, and could use God's help to intercede.  But the widow's rights may be incorrect here. 

I recommend she ask her husband to allow her to discipline the son her way & if she doesn't gain some ground fast, send the son to the father in laws.  She is in a dangerous situation.  She would be respectful to handle the situation in this matter, hopefully he'll understand.  Technically she is the head of the household while he is away for extended leave anyway.  Following these actions she may need to ask for forgiveness later, and so what, pride is cheap.