TASK DEFINITION: In this task, you are given a review of movie. Your task is to classify given movie review into two categories: 1) positive, and 2) negative based on its content.
PROBLEM: Evidently lots of people really like this, but I found it infantilising and reasonably offensive codswallop, saved from oblivion by Jane Russell and a couple of memorable musical numbers, especially the opener (but there's a marked dip in invention later on). I don't get on with Monroe - she's supposed to be playing a dumb blonde who ain't that dumb, but she just comes over as dumb. Russell can't quite convince when she claims never to have been in a gymnasium, but is otherwise rather wonderful. The men are staggeringly uninteresting, as is the plot. By no means atrocious, but so patchy that, if this is a classic, God help us all.

SOLUTION: negative

PROBLEM: Those of the "Instant Gratification" era of horror films will no doubt complain about this film's pace and lack of gratuitous effects and body count. The fact is, "The Empty Acre" is a good a example of how independent horror films should be done.If you avoid the indie racks because you are tired of annoying teens or twenty somethings getting killed by some baddie whose back-story could have come off the back of a Count Chocula box, "The Empty Acre" is the movie for you.Set in the decaying remnants of the rural American dream, "The Empty Acre" is the tale of a young couple struggling with the disappearance of their six-month-old baby. As the couple's weak relationship falls apart, a larger story plays out in the background. At night, a shapeless dark mass seethes from a sun baked barren acre on their farm and seemingly devours anything in its path, leaving no sign that it was ever there.The film is loaded with enigmatic characters and visual clues as to what is happening, and ends with a well executed ending that resonates with just enough left over questions to validate the writer/director's faith in an intellectual audience.There seems to be a sub-text concerning the death of the American dream, but I would hardly call the film an allegory. Riveting, well acted, and technically astute, "The Empty Acre" is a fantastic little indie that thinking horror fans should love.

SOLUTION: positive

PROBLEM: This was an atrocious waste of my time. No plot. The acting was so far below par, it should be used as an exemplar in acting classes of what NOT to do. It is merely a commercial rip-off of the earlier Universal Soldier, which also scrapes the bottom of the acting barrel. Its sad that VD needs to assert his ego every few years, and sadder still that people will pay good money to sit thru it. This kind of schlock gives Martial Arts movies a bad name. By comparison, it makes Segall, Norris, and Arnold look almost talented.Perhaps VD should take the Leslie Nielson track and do send-ups of his genre. At least then we could be laughing with him instead of at him.

SOLUTION:
negative