TASK DEFINITION: In this task, you must classify if a given review is positive/negative, indicating your answer as P or N.
PROBLEM: after the simple looking little spacecraft lands in a automobile wrecking yard , out steps a steel - gray , human - like creature with aquamarine eyes and clad in a muscular suit .
spencer , the boy who observes this , having seen his fill of science fiction flicks , figures this thing must be a robot from outer space .
with the exception of disney and a few others , most studios view children 's films as a way to ship a cheap and unimaginative product and thereby make a quick profit .
star kid stands out as that rare kids ' film that is undoubtedly low - budget but is also highly imaginative .
remember , the robot ?
it was n't one at all but rather a " phase one assault cyborsuit .
"
the cyborsuit is actually a prototype combat enhancer developed by the trelkins and jettisoned for latter retrieval when they are under attack from the invading broodwarriors .
the significant twist in the story is that spencer gets to go inside the cyborsuit , and the cyborsuit , nicknamed cy , has plenty of spunk .
cy keeps questioning the kid about everything including words like " cool .
" upon hearing that " command , " cy starts rapidly decreasing the temperature in the cyborsuit until spencer screams for him to stop .
and when cy speaks , we see spencer 's view , the backside of cy 's lips and eyes .
as 12-year - old spencer , joseph mazzello from the jurassic park film series gives a remarkably good performance as a wimpy and initially tongue - tied kid .
even when enclosed in his powerful new cyborsuit , he has his fears but he learns to overcome them .
"
if you run away , things do n't get better , whether it 's bullies , spiders , or girls , " his science teacher advises him after he has difficulties dealing with all three .
turbo ( joey simmrin ) , the school 's chubby bully , beats up on him , spiders frighten him , and , most embarrassing of all , he ca n't speak when in the presence of his would - be girlfriend .
with his cyborsuit on , he learns some bravery that transcends his time inside cy .
spencer lives with his dad and his older teenage sister stacey , played by a smart - mouthed ashlee levitch , who looks like a younger sarah jessica parker .
stacey derides her brother , whom she barely tolerates , by referring to him only as " the fungus .
"
this whole setup for spencer 's downtrodden and delightfully funny life makes his acquisition of some superhuman powers a source of mirth and empowerment .
the beauty of mazzello 's performance is that you can vicariously experience his fear and share in his enjoyment when he goes after the bully to teach him a lesson he 'll not soon forget .
the ensuing mayhem has some of the home alone antics , but the slapstick is kept tightly under control by writer and director manny coto so that one never feels embarrassed to be laughing .
the romantic angle is handled ever so delicately . when cy wishes to know if spencer wants to mate with the object of his desire , michelle ( lauren eckstrom ) , his eyes open wide in revulsion .
" mate with her ! " spencer exclaims .
" pllllleeeeease , i just like her
that 's all .
"
the show has many funny twists .
in one , cy sees a man in a barney - like costume and begins firing at him , thinking he is an alien life - form .
soon things get way out of hand , and cy and spencer have to beat a hasty retreat .
as proof positive of the show 's class , it actually contains tasteful bathroom humor
-- thought that was an oxymoron in a kids ' picture , did n't you ?
cy can not allow spencer to leave the cyborsuit , and what happens when he needs to urinate becomes both sweet and hilarious .
the director 's staging of this sequence is one of the film 's more charming moments .
oh , and eating is pretty funny too .
spencer , whose idol is the comic book character " midknight warrior , " gets to face the challenge of a lifetime when a broodwarrior comes to capture the cyborsuit .
spencer 's valiant battle gives him a chance to find his mettle .
and the action sequences in the battle
manage to be quite respectable for a kids ' show full of inventiveness and lacking the usual repetition .
for a family movie mixing humor , fantasy , and action , star kid delivers .
although it 's probably not the sort of movie you 'd want to see without kids , with them
you 'll have a magical time with a relatively straightforward but well developed story
.
you 'll be rooting for and laughing with spencer and his buddy cy all the way through .
star kid runs 1 : 41 .
it is rated pg for fantasy combat .
although the basically cartoonish broodwarrior might scare the littlest kids , i saw none of this in evidence in our packed screening , so i would say the show is fine for kids five and up , and possibly the younger ones .
my son jeffrey , age 8 , got really excited about the picture .
he called it " an especially good movie " and gave it
*
* * * .
when i asked him to tell me his favorite characters , he mentioned almost everyone in it from the boy to the cyborsuit to the bully .

SOLUTION: P

PROBLEM: it happens every year -- the days get longer , the weather gets warmer and the studios start releasing their big - budget blockbusters .
this year 's crop already seems inferior to that of past summers , even 1997 's lackluster trio of batman & robin , the fifth element and the lost world .
the marketing blitz in 1998 has been centered on godzilla ( " heeere , lee - zerd , lee - zerd . . . " ) , which does n't make me optimistic about future summers .
godzilla is , of course , based on a series of cult movies ( translation : really bad movies only a few people can tolerate ) from japan that turn up really late at night on ted turner - owned cable stations .
that this big - budget remake wo n't rise above its roots is fairly obvious .
the credits show us the origin of godzilla .
in five words : nuclear explosion creates giant lizard .
sounds like an enquirer headline , does n't it ?
the mushroom cloud is followed by the inevitable " discovery " sequence .
this time , a japanese guy is eating noodles with chopsticks while watching sumo wrestling ( if that ai n't a stereotype . . . )
when he discovers the telltale radar blip .
people die .
cut to our protagonist , played by matthew broderick .
he makes his first appearance wearing headphones , warbling along to " singin ' in the rain .
"
it 's a none - too - subtle sign that he wishes he were in a classier movie .
no dice , bueller .
from the beginning , poor matthew has to do embarassing things like fondle giant earthworms and stand in godzilla 's enormous footprint .
every disaster movie has to have a know - it - all scientist , and this time broderick is it .
as the world 's leading expert on radiated earthworms ( and would n't you love to have that printed on your business card ? ) , broderick is invaluable to the government .
he immediately dispels vicki lewis ' theory that godzilla is a dinosaur because , hey , you ca n't take seriously the intellectual arguments of " newsradio " cast members .
broderick instead hits the nail on the head , announcing godzilla is a radiated lizard .
"
the radiation is n't an anamoly , " he announces , and lightning strikes .
"
i believe this is a mutated abberation , " he continues , and lightning strikes again .
it 's vocabulary lightning , you see ,
activated by words of four syllables or more .
meanwhile , we 're introduced to our new york cast , headed by an ambitious broadcast journalist ( maria patillo ) , broderick 's former love .
gee , what are the odds their paths will cross again at a dramatically important time ?
poor patillo has been trying to get ahead in the news business for years but has been held down by heartless anchorman harry shearer .
italian cameraman hank azaria tells her she 's not ruthless enough : " nice does n't get you anywhere in this town .
it 's dog eat dog .
"
actually , it 's lizard eat city , as godzilla emerges from the atlantic to begin a rampage on the big apple 's core .
the filmmakers provide us with a one - note drunk fisherman who hooks godzilla .
"
i think i 've got a bite , " he announces as a gigantic tidal wave begins rushing toward him .
you can guess what happens next .
similar reactions spring forth as the monster prowls the city .
hearing the rumble of approaching footsteps , one new yorker remarks , " please do n't tell me that 's another parade .
" please do n't tell me that 's the best line you could come up with .
mayor ebert is not pleased . played by the principal from " head of the class , " he continually makes the wrong decision when given an option , and bickers with his assistant gene .
i guess the filmmakers knew they 'd be getting two thumbs down from the critics and did n't even bother to kiss ass .
the problem is , if you 're going to attack siskel and ebert , you should at least make it funny .
dialogue like , " did n't we agree that we were n't going to have any sweets until after the election ?
" followed by , " back off , gene , " just does n't work for me .
other lame running jokes include everyone mispronouncing the broderick character 's last name and frenchman jean reno 's inability to find a good cup of coffee in new york .
there 's even more fun to be had as godzilla progresses .
as the beast heads back into hiding , broderick suggests the military lure it out with food .
cue twelve dump trucks , all dropping fish into a new york intersection .
( broderick :
that 's a lot of fish . )
that ambush fails , but broderick soon figures out why godzilla came to new york by buying $ 50 worth of home pregnancy tests and running lizard blood through them .
yep , godzilla 's with children , which makes you wonder just what kind of creature would be horny enough to have sex with godzilla .
that 's until broderick explains that godzilla reproduces asexually , like linda tripp .
godzilla comes to us from the makers of independence day , so
it has a lot of dumb action scenes , destructive special effects and shallow subplots .
look no further than patillo 's betrayal of broderick
( patillo : what have i done , animal ?
what have i become ? ) and the climactic " godzilla 's nest " sequence in madison square garden .
the main difference is , independence day was about the experience .
it had a real global , patriotic element to it , and some genuinely fun characters .
godzilla has lots of rain and lightning , reptilian action ripped off from jurassic park and endless product placement from the likes of kodak , blockbuster , juicy fruit , swatch , sprint and bumble bee tuna .
yes , bumble bee actually paid to be known as the official tuna of godzilla .
that fact alone is twice as interesting as anything in the movie .

SOLUTION: N

PROBLEM: " shagadellic ! " , " groovy , baby ! "
" smashing !
" adorn the 1/4 page ad for this movie tabbed as " the # 1 comedy in america " as of may 8th .
did we attend the same movie ? !
at 87 minutes
it seemed overlong , like a snl skit on steroids , and at any length
it seemed unfunny .
yes , the sets and costumes were an interesting exaggeration of 60s pop frills , and yes , the concept , dealing with a 60s secret agent / pop icon ( played by myers ) awakened from his cryogenic slumber to battle his arch enemy ( dr .
evil , also played by myers ) in the present day , had a great deal of potential .
fun costumes and scenery and potential
do not a movie make
so lets throw in a hefty dose of bathroom humor .
do n't get me wrong , i like a good " bubbles in the bathtub joke " as much as the next person , but to have this type of humor be the funniest thing about your movie
is a waste of yuor talent and my money .
but , the way things work these days in the movie business , all a film has to do is
call itself the funniest and people will believe it .
i do give this film stars because of the sets , costumes , and sadly , unmet potential .

SOLUTION:
N