Produced by Charles Aldarondo  HTML version by Al HainesTHE LOST WORDA Christmas Legend of Long AgoByHENRY VAN DYKENew YorkMDCCCXCVIIIDEDICATED TO MY FRIEND HAMILTON W MABIECONTENTS   I THE POVERTY OF HERMAS  II A CHRISTMAS LOSS III PARTING BUT NO FAREWELL  IV LOVE IN SEARCH OF A WORD   V RICHES WITHOUT REST  VI GREAT FEAR AND RECOVERED JOYITHE POVERTY OF HERMASCOME down Hermas come down The night is past It is time to bestirring Christ is born today Peace be with you in His name Makehaste and come downA little group of young men were standing in a street of Antioch inthe dusk of early morning fifteen hundred years ago It was a classof candidates who had nearly finished their two years of trainingfor the Christian church They had come to call their fellowstudentHermas from his lodgingTheir voices rang out cheerily through the cool air They were fullof that glad sense of life which the young feel when they awake andcome to rouse one who is still sleeping There was a note offriendly triumph in their call as if they were exultingunconsciously in having begun the adventure of the new day beforetheir comradeBut Hermas was not asleep He had been waking for hours and thedark walls of his narrow lodging had been a prison to his restlessheart A nameless sorrow and discontent had fallen upon him and hecould find no escape from the heaviness of his own thoughtsThere is a sadness of youth into which the old cannot enter Itseems to them unreal and causeless But it is even more bitter andburdensome than the sadness of age There is a sting of resentmentin it a fever of angry surprise that the world should so soon be adisappointment and life so early take on the look of a failure Ithas little reason in it perhaps but it has all the more wearinessand gloom because the man who is oppressed by it feels dimly thatit is an unnatural and an unreasonable thing that he should beseparated from the joy of his companions and tired of living beforehe has fairly begun to liveHermas had fallen into the very depths of this strange selfpity Hewas out of tune with everything around him He had been thinkingthrough the dead still night of all that he had given up when heleft the house of his father the wealthy pagan Demetrius to jointhe company of the Christians Only two years ago he had been one ofthe richest young men in Antioch Now he was one of the poorest Andthe worst of it was that though he had made the choice willinglyand accepted the sacrifice with a kind of enthusiasm he was alreadydissatisfied with itThe new life was no happier than the old He was weary of vigils andfasts weary of studies and penances weary of prayers and sermonsHe felt like a slave in a treadmill He knew that he must go on Hishonour his conscience his sense of duty bound him He could notgo back to the old careless pagan life again for something hadhappened within him which made a return impossible Doubtless he hadfound the true religion but he had found it only as a task and aburden its joy and peace had slipped away from himHe felt disillusioned and robbed He sat beside his hard littlecouch waiting without expectancy for the gray dawn of another emptyday and hardly lifting his head at the shouts of his friendsCome down Hermas you sluggard Come down It is Christmas mornAwake and be glad with usI am coming he answered listlessly only have patience a momentI have been awake since midnight and waiting for the dayYou hear him said his friends one to another How he puts us allto shame He is more watchful more eager than any of us Ourmaster John the Presbyter does well to be proud of him He is thebest man in our class When he is baptized the church will get astrong memberWhile they were talking the door opened and Hermas stepped out Hewas a figure to be remarked in any companytall broadshoulderedstraighthipped with a head proudly poised on the firm column ofthe neck and short brown curls clustering over the square foreheadIt was the perpetual type of vigourous and intelligent young manhoodsuch as may be found in every century among the throngs of ordinarymen as if to show what the flower of the race should be But thelight in his dark blue eyes was clouded and uncertain his smoothcheeks were leaner than they should have been at twenty and therewere downward lines about his mouth which spoke of desires unsatisfiedand ambitions repressed He joined his companions with briefgreetingsa nod to one a word to anotherand they passed togetherdown the steep streetOverhead the mystery of daybreak was silently transfiguring the skyThe curtain of darkness had lifted softly upward along the edge ofthe horizon The ragged crests of Mount Silpius were outlined withpale rosy light In the central vault of heaven a few large starstwinkled drowsily The great city still chiefly pagan lay morethan half asleep But multitudes of the Christians dressed in whiteand carrying lighted torches in their hands were hurrying towardthe Basilica of Constantine to keep the latest holy day of thechurch the new festival of the birthday of their MasterThe vast bare building was soon crowded and the younger convertswho were not yet permitted to stand among the baptized found itdifficult to come to their appointed place between the first twopillars of the house just within the threshold There was somegoodhumoured pressing and jostling about the door but thecandidates pushed steadily forwardBy your leave friends our station is beyond you Will you let uspass Many thanksA touch here a courteous nod there a little patience a littlepersistence and at last they stood in their place Hermas wastaller than his companions he could look easily over their headsand survey the white sea of people stretching away through thecolumns under the shadows of the high roof as the