Are Technical People Destined to be Single? - Page 1
Forum section: electronics / general

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 07:01:26 am
content: Just talking with a fellow nerd who said whilst discussing kids and single vs married, and he said:"A surprising number of technical people are destined to be single for their entire lives. There is literally no breeding or paternal instinct built in."So I thought this would make an interesting poll, so here it is, no better place to ask...

author: Siwastaja
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 07:08:24 am
content: I don't believe there is significant correlation like that. A "surprising" number ofpeople in general, not just "technical", are "destined" to be single. That's just normal variation in people. It is very easy to overanalyze it because we have strong traits of pattern matching and confirmation biasing built in.

author: krish2487
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 07:12:25 am
content: I agree with@Siwastaja. I am pretty certain that you look at any niche group like this and you would find such a similar sentiment being echoed there as well..Edit : @EEVblog , I think one more option might be in order "Was married, no kids but want both"

author: RoGeorge
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 07:23:17 am
content: The poll reminds me of this:The scene is from Idiocracy (2006), a so called comedy movie.With each year it becomes more and more a documentary.

author: voltsandjolts
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 07:30:34 am
content: Where's the "Married, with kids, never again" option?

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 07:39:00 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 12, 2025, 07:01:26 amWicht diploma is requied to be in the "Technical People" cohort please ?

author: Picuino
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 08:30:37 am
content: Although one would have to read papers on it, I believe that asperger's syndrome and other certain mild autism conditions can make people who suffer from it prefer to study STEM subjects. The subjects are predictable and follow strict rules, much more so than other literature ones.This condition is associated with difficulties in relating to others and can affect their sentimental life.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger_syndrome

author: sleemanj
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 08:54:53 am
content: I think it's entirely reasonable to think that STEM people will be more likely (than non STEM people) to exist in singledom, if by choice or not.I am in that category, nearing 50 years, I don't know if it's by choice or not to be honest, but I don't think I would be good at the "relationship" thing, so never bothered, I just don't really understand that sort of social thing.I could never understand how, well, not to put to fine a point on it, how normal people spend so much time "chatting", there is only so much information to impart.Perhaps I am "on the spectrum", or perhaps I'm just a misanthrope, whatever.

author: woofy
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 09:03:20 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 12, 2025, 07:01:26 amYour fellow nerd is talking c**p. Probably too much frying of brain with mega high voltages (??I am married with kids.Among my technical friends, all are married.Amongst my current technical work colleagues, all are married.At my previous job, all but one technical guy was married.I see zero evidence to support his claim.

author: tom66
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 09:12:53 am
content: In a relationship, with no kids. Probably won't have kids... too expensive and not particularly interested in them. Instead, have two cats and a dog. That's more than enough.It's nice to have someone to confide in, to cuddle when things are going badly and to celebrate when things go well.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 09:31:01 am
content: Quote from: voltsandjolts on April 12, 2025, 07:30:34 amNo backsies.

author: hans
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 10:41:33 am
content: Quote from: Picuino on April 12, 2025, 08:30:37 am"suffer" :shrugs:There is a lot of misconceptions about autism (and ADHD for that matter). Most of them originate from deviating strategies in attention and communication. They are different, "less compatible", but that doesn't mean that they don't or cannot exist.However, people with high levels of autism can 'suffer' from it. And autism doesn't always get better with age once people get stuck in rigidity with nostalgic/retro interests from their younger years that at some point doesn't work with today's world anymore.I find it highly amusing to see this in IT: on the one hand, fixing "retro" computers is hot because once the box works you don't need anything else, and it attracts a certain folk of people. On the other hand, that strategy doesn't work to anything thats connected to the internet, as any box that doesn't get patched is a huge liability.Anyhow, I think the "einzelganger" vibe is more related with a not wanting to be tied down to people. This can also originate from trauma. However, I think that alternate identity and relationship forms like LAT, polymorphic and LGBTQ are VERY common within the neurodivergent community. And this more free mindset has finally been able to break free from its chains in the past few decades.I think its a huge myth that autistic people want to be alone at all. Kids, maybe a different story, though. I think that maybe the older generations that were 'destined' to be single, that now would have made different choices if they were Gen Z/millenials.

author: Picuino
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 11:47:03 am
content: Quote from: hans on April 12, 2025, 10:41:33 amI agree. I'm sorry I expressed it that way. Maybe I got lost with the translation.

author: Xena E
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 02:14:30 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 12, 2025, 07:01:26 amAs we are generalising, I'm saying that IME that statement is utter Bollocks!As for the poll...For accuracy none of the above.Regards,Xena.

author: SteveThackery
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 02:27:48 pm
content: FUDI'm single, always have been, because I'mfat,ugly, anddisagreeable.And now for my generalisation, which I firmly believe to be valid based on two very different sectors of the population.I think deeply technical jobs attract people who show mild Asperger's-like characteristics. I think these people, in general, show poorer social skills than people in non-technical roles even in the same company, such as marketing, HR, etc. I've observed that a good proportion of them have strongly-held views and opinions which they are often reluctant to let go, and in general I've found they often have poor team-working skills. These people may work in teams, but are less "team players" because most of the time they can shut themselves away and do their particular specialism without extensive interactions with others.These observations are based on a modern industry - telecommunications - and a historical industry - horology (clock and watch making and repairing).Horologists, in general, are distinctly "nerdy". They prefer to work alone and find interacting with people to be hard work and they tend to avoid it. When they have to interact with other horologists they quickly start arguing about some detail that seems important to them, and almost immediately become firmly entrenched in their position. Embracing change and accepting new points if view are very rare qualities in horologists.I'm speaking here as an ex-Chairman of the British Horological Institute.My 32 years in telecommunications (16 in R&D) exposed me to somewhat similar people, which is why I think there is something - not a lot, but something - in my generalisations.HOWEVER,I don't think this has anything to do with partners and kids. The great majority of horologists and telecoms nerds are married, and most of those have kids. I see no sign that these characteristics make an person unattractive, or that they prefer not to have a partner and/or kids.So, I reject the original premise that "nerds" prefer to be single, but I do believe them to be significantly off-centre (eccentric) when it comes to their people-related skills and preferences.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 02:40:16 pm
content: I put the first answer. Oddly enough I like children, but don't want a woman. If I had a load of money and didn't have to work, I would adopt.

author: Bud
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 02:40:33 pm
content: Was the "fellow nerd" heterosexual? If not, then his opinion is biased.(I may have a good guess who you spoke to, since I heard him talking the same).

author: hwasti
author_rank: Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 04:04:27 pm
content: Quote from: woofy on April 12, 2025, 09:03:20 amWell, there are nerds and there are wannabe nerds. Just saying...

author: TimFox
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 04:32:05 pm
content: Public records of US census data (with personal ID deleted) are readily available.When I was studying physics at the university, I saw grad students in social sciences using those data to research questions like that: the detailed data include education, occupation, marital status, income, family, etc.Were I interested in this question, I could look up published results from such research.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 07:39:08 pm
content: Quote from: SteveThackery on April 12, 2025, 02:27:48 pmThe funny thing is, I know it's not my appearance. I'm of healthy weight and have been told I don't have a bad face, a little on the short side, but there are many shorter men than me. I also wouldn't say I'm especially disagreeable.QuoteYes, that's me. I've also been unofficially diagnosed with autism by a therapist where do my voluntary work.It did bother me when I was younger, but I've noticed that I just feel happier when I'm single and find dating too stressful, so it makes sense.

author: BILLPOD
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 08:56:16 pm
content: Good Morning Dave, there is a glaring omission in the choices. Besides me, I'm sure there are a bunch of members that would fit into a category of: Married and retired and have grown children not living at home.

author: abeyer
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 10:16:40 pm
content: There are plenty of people who reproduce without marriage, and plenty of people who marry without reproducing, so the original premise doesn't even sound like a single claim, but two unrelated ones.And then in mixing them together (along with some other factors) the poll then tries to ask at least four different questions at once without having enough options to begin to cover even just the "obviously valid" combinations, let alone the weird but still possible ones.

author: abeyer
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 10:19:41 pm
content: Quote from: SteveThackery on April 12, 2025, 02:27:48 pmI think the above video pretty well demonstrates that's far from disqualifying.

author: themadhippy
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 12, 2025, 10:57:35 pm
content: I put me of ever wanting kids,i was a right little shite, even with the best efforts of my parents,and the though of another me roaming around is enough to put anyone off.A more serious question for all of us who are happy on there lonesome, how many are only children?

author: Andy Chee
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 01:08:28 am
content: Somewhat related, here's a limited survey of people's occupations and their partner's occupationshttps://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-09-18/who-you-ll-probably-marry-based-on-your-job/104334548

author: coppercone2
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 02:46:37 am
content: I noticed something with technical skills, its that companies are littered with like impostors, and that talking about your work is a sure fire way to get some body that has no idea what their doing to try to be your manager because they might think they understand what it is, also has to do with project theft.Nothing is as easy to steal as some improvement someone noticed could be made and they are bouncing around in their head at lunch.Every inventor (even if its just for your work lab) is cagey, sometimes I guess people forget about it when they don't run into a 'plausible thief' at work for a while. And you know as a individual that the ideas that could actually make money are marginal improvements that look like they took no effort at all to develop... you know because you are not a 30 person R&D engineer team working for a defense contractor. Don't forget some people enter a fit of rage every paycheck wondering how to get a raise...What does your manager tell you btw? The smart thing to do is share at meetings with your team, not with externals. Plus if you start talking about stuff that sounds expensive someone will come after you with the budget shank or attack your team culture or whatever. I am sure more then a few technical people just had it with the bullshit that can come with inadvertently gossiping at lunch when it finally effected their bottom line. And the perpetual 'war' between R&D/engineering and administration/finance/sales got like super bad. I say its not safe to jibber jabber. And with the simple truth that talking is a skill, which increases with time spent, people that do 9 meetings per day are just higher level then you in the little 'spy game' going on at work.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 03:01:54 am
content: Quote from: Andy Chee on April 13, 2025, 01:08:28 amFail.Mrs EEVblog is an environmental scientist.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 03:11:00 am
content: Quote from: abeyer on April 12, 2025, 10:16:40 pmWhat is missing? It covers most normal options.

author: Andy Chee
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 03:21:44 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 13, 2025, 03:01:54 amWhen I plugged in environmental scientist, I got electrician….. close enough for me.

author: abeyer
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 03:54:37 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 13, 2025, 03:11:00 amI think the most glaring missing ones are previously married, no kids, would remarry & have kids; and previously married, no kids, would remarry & still don't want kids.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 04:08:00 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 13, 2025, 03:01:54 amI hate trying to pick what I am from fixed categories. I guess "Software and Applications Programmers" is the closest, though I do SYSTEMS software such as compilers, runtime libraries, JITs and emulators, a bit of OS kernel, embedded software, a bit CPU instruction set design, and also get dangerous with a soldering iron from time to time.The site says 16.5% I'll marry another Software and Applications Programmer, 2.9% accountant, 2.7% child carer, 2.6% ICT Manager, 2.4% registered nurse for a total of 27.3%. I don't know what the other 72.7% is supposed to be ... not marry? Marry someone else?I can't help but think that the accountant through registered nurse ones are already pretty much just their overall percentage of the population.In actual fact I married (and divorced) a graphic artist and my other long term relationships have been with a concert pianist/teacher, a technical writer, a self-help book author, a medical assistant/admin/bookkeeper, a home-birth midwife, and a couple of ESL or Russian language teachers and a TV news presenter / producer. Yeah, I'm old, and by "long term" I mean lived with or frequently dated for a year or more.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 04:23:48 am
content: Just out of pure curiosity to see what they'd come up with I was trying and failing to find the category for only fans / cam girl / adult entertainer / stripper / pornstar or even the oldest profession itself.Any clues?

author: abeyer
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 04:56:25 am
content: And gay farmersreallydon't get out much

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 06:55:19 am
content: Quote from: RoGeorge on April 12, 2025, 07:23:17 amThis is a movie I can't watch due to how stupid it is, but I agree that the premise of it seems to be more and more accurate with the years passing by, 400 years from now it might even be worse then what the movie shows.The couple in the intro seems very stereo typical though, and I can't see myself in them. My choice to not have kids was made early on in live because I hated the kids that were mean and bullied me in school. Not because I was particularly nerdy, but because I dressed shabby and came from the poorer part of town.My live choices from then on, were always with the fact that I did not want children in mind. At some point a lovely woman was interested in me, but I turned her down because I knew she wanted children. There is no compromising on that subject, so best to not put yourself in that position to start with.I'm compliant with the chart EEVblog posted though. I partnered with a registered nurse.Only got married when we bought our house in France. Was the easiest option to avoid having to pay the 60% inheritance tax when one of us would unforeseen pass on. Otherwise we would still just have been partners without status.The premise that technical people are destined to remain single seems bollocks to me. Throughout my life I have met plenty people either technical or not that chose to be married with kids, but also some that chose to be alone or married/partnered without kids.

author: Xena E
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 07:38:16 am
content: Quote from: coppercone2 on April 13, 2025, 02:46:37 amI think this would make a great squares thread in its own right, but I just can't see how it fits here... another topic perhaps?

author: Halcyon
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 08:15:13 am
content: The link between CEO's and other senior leaders, and PA's, Office Assistants etc... is interesting... although not surprising. I guess they end up together after their wives find out.

author: David Hess
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 08:20:03 am
content: My parents met at Lawrence Radiation Lab, so you can guess what kind of selection was going on there.For myself, no woman could put up with me for long enough.

author: MT
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 12:19:32 pm
content: Then on the other side you have people like Musk with 14 children (5 wifes) and he's not even a engineer, just a simple finance-bro.

author: joeqsmith
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 12:36:08 pm
content: Quote from: Xena E on April 13, 2025, 07:38:16 amAgree, don't see what it has to do with the topic and I'm sure we all have ran into people who like to take credit for other peoples efforts.

author: SiliconWizard
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 01:25:02 pm
content: Quote from: abeyer on April 13, 2025, 03:54:37 amAh but what about: "previously married, kids, but all sadly dead, would remarry but not sure about having other kids due to the pain of having lost my first, and also I currently have a secret relationship with my CEO but I don't know where it's gonna lead, and my cousin's currently going through a phase, they think they identify as an electrical engineer, but they are teaching arts at a community college, so too many balls there (no pun intended), feeling a bit overwhelmed."

author: joeqsmith
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 01:33:00 pm
content: Quote from: SiliconWizard on April 13, 2025, 01:25:02 pmWhen you are announcing it to the world wide web, it is really a secret?

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 03:17:43 pm
content: Quote from: joeqsmith on April 13, 2025, 01:33:00 pmAs described in the video at the beginning of the topic, people that copulate the most are not the most intelligent !

author: Ice-Tea
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 03:50:15 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 13, 2025, 03:01:54 amHeh. So is Mrs. Ice-Tea.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 04:14:15 pm
content: Quote from: MT on April 13, 2025, 12:19:32 pmI understand some people dislike the man, but he does have a physics degree and was accepted into a Ph.D. program in materials science at Stanford University though he didn't complete it due to concentrating on a startup.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 04:18:16 pm
content: Quote from: Coordonnée_chromatique on April 13, 2025, 03:17:43 pmI'm not sure if you're aware, but since the 1960s copulation and reproduction have been largely disconnected, with either being possible without the other.Even without hormonal aid, the intelligent and diligent have always been able to quite successfully copulate without reproduction if that's what they want.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 05:38:00 pm
content: Quote from: BILLPOD on April 12, 2025, 08:56:16 pmYes it is: Married/Partnered with kids covers it.There are no options for homosexual, but there again generally gay men are much less likely to be in a long term relationship and even less likely to have children.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 06:15:45 pm
content: Quote from: brucehoult on April 13, 2025, 04:18:16 pmI was joking, i'm sure that everyone including you had understood but i prefer to write itit will take a while to read enough studies in order to have an idea of the correlation, but the cohort IS ALWAYS biasing everythingI'd prefer to focus on the nutition because it is much more important than copulation, i've read CAREFULLY thousands pages of studies with a cohort coherent to my genetics in order to attain the basicknowledge of the human nutition. I is a real big intellectual inversement and i've perhaps used the resources dedicated to copulation for this purposeNO REGRETS

author: tooki
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 06:30:20 pm
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 13, 2025, 05:38:00 pmIs this actually supported by data, or is it just a stereotype? (I have to run out now, and I couldn’t find any data in 1 minute of googling.)Anecdotally, I don’t feel like there’s any difference in LTR frequency between my straight and gay friends.(FWIW, I do think there are differences in how gay men behave in LTRs, but not in whether they enter them or not.)

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 06:34:11 pm
content: Quote from: brucehoult on April 13, 2025, 04:18:16 pmBetter statement is that the less intelligent people reproduce more.For the ones with a healthy sex drive and no desire to have kids the snip snip option is a wise one. You can poke it around without fear of making babies.Edit: And no, having a vasectomy does not modify your masculinity or sex drive. I can know, because I had one some 30 years ago.

author: MT
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 07:36:45 pm
content: Quote from: brucehoult on April 13, 2025, 04:14:15 pmJust because you have a bachelors degree dont equal you actually can engineer properly. But i understand some people glorifying a proven crock, zionist and market manipulator and fraudsterbut since he have 14 kids with weirdo names he cant be what the OP asked, single and technical savvy individual. He proven that by the recall of all manufacture Tesler Siber Trycks whos panelsfalls off due to gluing, not to mentioning rusting.

author: langwadt
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 07:42:22 pm
content: Quote from: SiliconWizard on April 13, 2025, 01:25:02 pmit a one man company and you're the CEO?

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 10:20:16 pm
content: Quote from: Ice-Tea on April 13, 2025, 03:50:15 pmI declare that a trend...

author: John B
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 10:40:52 pm
content: One aspect I've thought about is that I refuse to use any dating apps, despite the trend that it's where people meet now by and large. Even setting aside the social issues around them, the technology itself doesn't sit well with me. I'm not going to sign up to any services that log data about when I turn on a light bulb, let alone a trove of the most sensitive emotional profiling you can get on a person. Couple that with the increasing use of AI interactions to keep people using the apps and nudge them to paid services. No thanks. I prefer to vet people IRL first.

author: UnijunctionTransistor
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 13, 2025, 11:16:35 pm
content: Dilbert, amongst others, has noticed relationship between social awkwardness and engineers.https://youtu.be/g8vHhgh6oM0?si=zdrCb3tF57Sfo2RM

author: NiHaoMike
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 12:08:59 am
content: One big problem is that it's hard to find a partner also into the tech hobby, at least for guys looking for girls. It's getting better as more girls are getting into tech, but I wouldn't say the next generation is going to have that much easier of a time.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 12:45:57 am
content: Quote from: NiHaoMike on April 14, 2025, 12:08:59 amWhy does your partner have to be into the same hobby as you?Mrs EEVblog doesn't give a rats arse about electronics, nor my EEVblog business really as long as it keeps paying the bills.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 12:49:41 am
content: Quote from: MT on April 13, 2025, 07:36:45 pmWait, what? I'm sure I read that he's an anti-semite.Maybe he's both. Or ... neither?QuoteThree words, not one of them matching a Musk product.

author: NiHaoMike
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 01:20:41 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 12:45:57 amMaybe not the exact same hobby, but one that shares a lot of common interests. Think of the famous Evan and Katelyn duo in the maker community, they're more or less a near perfect example of how it can work.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 01:35:02 am
content: Quote from: NiHaoMike on April 14, 2025, 01:20:41 amI think they'd be by far the exception.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 01:36:53 am
content: Quote from: MT on April 13, 2025, 07:36:45 pmI will not have another thread hijacked by EDS, please stop.

author: Andy Chee
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 01:52:23 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 01:35:02 amThe common idiom that "opposites attract", has no basis when referring to partner's interests. On the contrary, the evidence strongly suggests that similar fields of interests are far more likely.https://labs.la.utexas.edu/buss/files/2015/09/Human-Mate-Selection-1985.pdf

author: John B
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 01:52:41 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 12:45:57 amMaybe you can both sit on the couch with a hot cup of chocolate and disagree on the merits of GOTO statements in your C code *.* may lead to goto divorce

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 03:11:49 am
content: Quote from: Andy Chee on April 14, 2025, 01:52:23 amSpecific hobbies like electronics can be different to more general fields of interest.I'm saying it's less common that specific deep interest hobbies are shared by the partner.Mrs EEVblog and I both like the outdoors and fitness for example, and of course, scientist and engineer are almost the same field. And then you have those who's hobby is their career (like me), and those like Mrs EEVblog and countless other engineers I know who have no real hobby interest in the field outside of of their career.Mrs EEVblog for example doesn't scientists monthly, or hang out on science forums. She has zero interest in my calculator collection, just like I have zero interest in her cooking.How many engineering and science Youtube channels for example have their partner actively participating? A few percent tops?

author: abeyer
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 05:08:50 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 03:11:49 amSomeone's eating franks and beans for a month

author: Siwastaja
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 05:40:42 am
content: Quote from: Andy Chee on April 14, 2025, 01:52:23 amI agree the idea of being polar opposite is bollocks, but that's literally the opposite extreme no one suggested here.The golden middle road of sharing some (basic values,someaspects of hobbies, etc...) provides enough common ground, but you don't both need to be interested about soldering irons and designing opamp circuits, as NiHaoMike kind of implied as being ideal. As he said, itcanwork. But if people expected to build relationships like that, 0.001% of us would be in relationship at all.Sharing some very basic values of life makes the pool larger. Being overly selective over trivial or superficial details (worst, forming long lists of requirements for potential partner) is cancerous to the society and one's own well-being. Humans can adjust, and humans can work with differences and actually benefit from them.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 05:50:06 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 12:45:57 amThere is more to life than one's hobby or job. So I agree with Dave. My wife is into gardening and jigsaw puzzles. She has no interest in technical stuff and that is just fine.A problem for the tech savvy might be meeting woman or man to hook up with. You have to either use some dating tool or go out into the real world to meet people. Both have their drawbacks, but it can work. I met my wife in a discotheque. Was pushed back by someone passing by and stepped on the tows of mrs pcprogrammer. We connected and are now 32 years together.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 05:55:02 am
content: Quote from: abeyer on April 14, 2025, 05:08:50 amI can eat the same thing day in day out, year in year out, doesn't bother me

author: David Hess
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 06:18:13 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 05:55:02 amI learned to cook just so that I did not have to eat the cooking of others, but I am a picky eater.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 09:20:32 am
content: Quote from: tooki on April 13, 2025, 06:30:20 pmAnecdotal. Of the gay men I've known, none of them are in steady, long term relationships. Yes, I know it's a small sample size and doesn't prove anything.

author: langwadt
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 10:54:55 am
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 13, 2025, 05:38:00 pmit just says partner/partnered, nothing about the sex of those involved

author: tszaboo
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 11:30:55 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 12:45:57 amDoesn't have to be. But I've dated other EEs, and the jokes just write themselves.Also doing projects together is a lot of fun. It's not required, but it's a very nice thing to have. And I likely never going to have that in my life anymore.Being single in today's world is not exactly about being an engineer or being socially awkward. There has been a huge trend, breaking modern dating. 60% of young men are reported to be single. Dating apps don't work anymore for either gender, for different reasons. It's difficult for everyone, not just us.

author: BILLPOD
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 01:28:31 pm
content: I will not have another thread hijacked by EDS, please stop.Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome is EDS, I thought it was a member's screen name.

author: Villi24
author_rank: Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 01:57:03 pm
content: Honestly? I don’t buy it.Yeah, a lot of us can get super focused on our work or hobbies, maybe even a little too into them sometimes but that doesn’t mean relationships are off the table. If anything, being passionate about something is a strength, not a weakness. It just takes some effort to find someone who gets it.I think balance is the key. It’s easy to get absorbed in a project or spend hours perfecting something, but relationships need time and effort too. Communication, empathy, and patience go a long way, skills anyone can build, no matter their background.

author: asmi
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 08:14:58 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 12:45:57 amThat's how my wife looked at my biz. But one day I offered her to teach how to assemble PCBs and hand-solder, and... she loved it! Since that time we take turns at assembling PCBs. Most of them contain 400+ components, so there is enough work for both of us, and work does not stop when one of us wants to take a break. She loves working under stereo microscope so much now that she even does her nails under it

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 10:06:53 pm
content: Quote from: BILLPOD on April 14, 2025, 01:28:31 pmI will not have another thread hijacked by EDS, please stop.Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome is EDS, I thought it was a member's screen name.You know I mean Elon Derangement Syndrome.

author: bte
author_rank: Regular Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 10:59:24 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 10:06:53 pmI didn't so I appreciate the clarification.

author: thm_w
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 11:21:37 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 12, 2025, 07:01:26 amWas that person single? If so I'm thinking they are justifying their own decisions and behavior. Either some defeatist thought pattern, or, what they say is true for themselves (could be medical condition etc), and assuming it applies to others.Quote from: sleemanj on April 12, 2025, 08:54:53 amThe fact that you are asking, would imply so, lol.QuoteSure, but you can meet someone that doesn't talk much if you prefer that. I barely talk.If you can, politely, listen in on a conversation on the bus/at restaurant/etc. you should understand fairly quickly what you are asking.Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 12:45:57 amDon't want to be an ass, but nihaomike has a slightly unhealthy obsession with tech-girl youtubers. No offense mike.Try meeting some "regular" women and you'll realize its really not important. You'd be happier with a decent human, regardless of their tech interests. Key word decent, whatever that is to you (kind, polite, intelligent, etc.).

author: temperance
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 11:30:44 pm
content: When it comes to dating, things have changed. Long ago only man went to work and women stayed home to take care of the children. Being good at earning money was enough for man to be on top of the dating scene. Then women also went to work and today most women are highly educated, became independent and they like their independence. Women holding on to a career don’t have time for things such as dating. And when they go dating, they are mostly after the same: they want to FEEL something. Making the other person feel something is what technical minded people with or without bachelor or engineering degrees with a brain wired to analyze everything into bits and pieces including the person sitting in front of you are really good at.

author: thm_w
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 11:33:18 pm
content: Quote from: Andy Chee on April 14, 2025, 01:52:23 amDid you, read that study? it has nothing to do with "fields of interest" in terms of tech, it covers mostly personality traits:- kindness, socially exciting, cultured/intelligence, religious orientation, feeling on children, easygoingness, political affiliation.I guess you can argue intelligence would limit the field of interest, to some degree. But not entirely, anyone of moderate intelligence could be into electronics.

author: TimFox
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 14, 2025, 11:36:59 pm
content: Ignoring questions of dating, marriage, and procreation:I pride myself on my education and am proud to be well-read.Once when traveling, I was chatting with another traveler who asked me about my job, and said that I must find it hard to talk to other people.On the contrary, I can almost always find some topic that both of us can talk about when meeting other people, especially when traveling.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 12:27:49 am
content: Quote from: thm_w on April 14, 2025, 11:21:37 pmYes, they are single.Quote from: EEVblog on April 14, 2025, 12:45:57 amDon't want to be an ass, but nihaomike has a slightly unhealthy obsession with tech-girl youtubers. No offense mike.I think everyone has noticed that

author: temperance
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 01:31:25 am
content: QuoteSharing common interests is only a very small part of life. Life is about how you deal with life itself. Each person has it subtleties sometimes buried very deep inside which you might not like at all. In that case you have two options. Accept them and it really means to accept them. If you can't accept them you must for the well being of both separate. Focusing on what is on the surface like polite, intelligent, descent,... is a waste of time in the long run. A descent person might not be as descent as they want you to believe. Sooner or later conflicts arise or extremely difficult decisions have to be made. When those times come around—and inevitable they will—if you don’t truly know your partner, you won’t have just one problem, but many.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 02:51:45 am
content: Quote from: thm_w on April 14, 2025, 11:21:37 pmWord to the wise: check that they are actually girls (whatever that means to you) at the earliest possible stage. If that's important to you.The potential to have children that are biologically related to them is important to many people.

author: Andy Chee
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 03:34:56 am
content: Quote from: thm_w on April 14, 2025, 11:33:18 pmYou (and EEVblog) are being way too narrowly specific. The general principle, is that partners are more similar than they are different.https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Shanhong-Luo/publication/318893340_Assortative_mating_and_couple_similarity_Patterns_mechanisms_and_consequences/links/5ae03233458515c60f642703/Assortative-mating-and-couple-similarity-Patterns-mechanisms-and-consequences.pdf

author: NiHaoMike
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 04:08:01 am
content: Quote from: thm_w on April 14, 2025, 11:21:37 pmIt's often difficult to get the not so technical ladies to see the real value of a technical hobby. And so it's a bit difficult to get them to make the first move to really understand what I can do.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 04:09:17 am
content: Quote from: Andy Chee on April 15, 2025, 03:34:56 amI think THM is correct, it's more to do with compatible personalities than actual interests.At a basic level you can't overcome the inherent differences in interests in men and women. The old adage about men being more interested in things, and women being more interested in people in a fundamental thing.So (and you always have to say for those who get angry or want to point of specific counter examples)on averagemen and women are going to have a different in what things they are interested in.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 08:10:07 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 13, 2025, 06:34:11 pmI'm sorry for that, what happened to you ?

author: NE666
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 08:51:45 am
content: Quote from: Coordonnée_chromatique on April 15, 2025, 08:10:07 amI think you misunderstand. A vasectomy is an elective procedure, a means of male contraception. It's not performed in response to trauma or pathology.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 09:59:21 am
content: Quote from: NE666 on April 15, 2025, 08:51:45 amYep, you have a vasectomy by choice, but there seems to be the misconception among the less intelligent, that it affects your manhood.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 10:02:16 am
content: Quote from: NE666 on April 15, 2025, 08:51:45 amYou are right, but a chirurgy is something invasive and traumatic for me, and the body. I recentely learned that the the adipose cells are emitting few hormones that have important interaction with sexual hormones and both are involved on the whole metabolism process called health.I believe that ALL fuctions are vital on a human body, we still don't undestand the equilibriums of all the interactions.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 10:04:39 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 09:59:21 amYou are fit healthy and sexually happy ?

author: dave j
author_rank: Regular Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 10:52:16 am
content: Quote from: Coordonnée_chromatique on April 15, 2025, 10:02:16 amMen quite happily consume alcohol, frequently to excess, despite the known negative affects it has on their ability to perform. Being concerned about the possibility of potential issues with vasectomies despite everyone who's had one saying it hasn't impacted either their desire or ability seems to be worrying unnecessarily.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:25:15 am
content: Quote from: dave j on April 15, 2025, 10:52:16 amSo, why worry with "desined to be single" ? i'm sure that a lot of people that have a very healthy life can also have serious health issues.IRL life is random by nature and live with someone is difficult for everyone.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:40:15 am
content: Quote from: Coordonnée_chromatique on April 15, 2025, 10:04:39 amI was until about 8 years or so ago. Nothing to do with the vasectomy as far as I can tell. I'm diagnosed with chronicle fatigue syndrome / fibromyalgia, which is still a big mystery in the medical science as to what causes it and how to treat it. There is some thought about it being stress related, and that I have had plenty throughout my life.A bit intimate, but the plumbing still works, although definitively not as frequent as 30 years ago.

author: dave j
author_rank: Regular Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:45:44 am
content: Quote from: Coordonnée_chromatique on April 15, 2025, 11:25:15 amI don't think people should be. As with having kids, being with someone isn't for everyone.QuoteAbsolutely. Even if you ignore external events such as accidents, if you've lost the genetic lottery there's only so much you can do health wise.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:48:40 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 11:40:15 amI'd be willing to bet it can be improved with a change in diet.An astonishing number of problems are diet related.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:54:31 am
content: Quote from: Coordonnée_chromatique on April 15, 2025, 11:25:15 amLiving single can also be difficult whether or not you desire for a partner.As it is, you always have to deal with what is thrown at you. Some can do this easily and others need help in one form or another. For me it takes some medicine to keep my head stable and for the rest I have to pace myself to keep the discomfort at minimal, which does not always pan out. There are times that I feel ok and take on a bit to much, for which I pay the price with a longer recovery and more pain. Having an understanding partner helps, but it took her time to come to grips with it too. At first she thought I was faking to not have to do chores.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:56:20 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 11:54:31 amI don't know. Living on my own means I can come and go as I please and I don't have anyone to nag me about my house being messy.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:58:39 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 11:40:15 ama bit intimate... i know that i'm equipped but i haven't verified if it works.Quote from: dave j on April 15, 2025, 11:45:44 amBoris Cyrulnik says that ou brains are unable to operate properly when we are alone, So single pople must live with a periodic brain dysfunction

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:59:34 am
content: Quote from: dave j on April 15, 2025, 11:45:44 amFor starters, being single lowers your potential income, and if you don't earn a lot then that could be the difference between struggle street and main street.Take Fran for example, been single forever and financially really struggles to keep the lights on with that single income.It also halves the home chores.And, well, there's the regular fun times as wellAlthough I have to admit that sometimes, just sometimes mind you, for a brief minute, I envy the single Youtubers.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 12:04:26 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 15, 2025, 11:59:34 amIt often also means lower outgoings. If I had a partner, I would go out more and my heating bill would be more than double. She might also insist of having a TV licence and paid TV or similar rubbish, which I choose not to have. Children are yet another expense.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 12:09:32 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 11:54:31 amThis is what you can expect when you don't have the time to do nothing at all... in order to evacuate your mental load, no one can cure that.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 12:10:15 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 15, 2025, 11:48:40 amI have tried a lot of different treatments, along with changed diets. Used to drink a lot of coca cola and ate a lot of sugar bearing products, etc. Changed it to only drinking water and eating healthy foods, but it did not change a thing, except my weight.There is a lot to be found on the net about the disorder and how people suffering from it benefit from one or the other treatment. The only medicine so far being beneficial to me is Duloxetine. It keeps my mood stable and suppresses a low frequency hum I otherwise experience. I have tried magnesium oil rubs, CBD oil capsules, GABA supplement, palmitoylethanolamide (PEA), and what ever suggested, but so far nothing brought long term improvement.I started taking Ginkgo Biloba and are going to add ubiquinol coenzyme Q10 to see if it stands up to the claims.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 12:12:23 pm
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 15, 2025, 11:56:20 amThere are benefits for both situations for sure.

author: NE666
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 12:16:36 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 15, 2025, 11:59:34 amRemember kids, the value of your investment may fall as well as rise..I have a few friends who, for various reasons, have had long-term relationships end in divorce. That can be very expensive, at least in the UK, if you've been the major breadwinner on paper.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 12:17:25 pm
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 15, 2025, 12:04:26 pmNot having them allowed me and the misses to retire at about age 47.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 12:51:55 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 12:10:15 pmAre you stressed ? mixed with blood hypertension it will harm you health.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 01:25:00 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 12:10:15 pmGood thing about it is that it doesn't hurt to try radical things for a few weeks or a month and see what happens.e.g. i hear stories all the time of people going on a 100% carnivore diet, or dropping wheat entirely, or some other radical change, and then magically all their medical issues went away."eating healthy" in general is great, but it doesn't isolate something that might be an inflamatory or whatever.

author: Siwastaja
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 06:25:48 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 15, 2025, 01:25:00 pm1) Placebo,2) Selection bias, you only hear from those who did see (or think they saw) a difference, while those 95% for whom it failed keep silent about their experiment.That being said, as long as harmful/dangerous experiments are avoided, it does not hurt to try, and even if it's placebo, if it helps then it helps, so

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 07:40:26 pm
content: Quote from: Coordonnée_chromatique on April 15, 2025, 12:51:55 pmIf anything I suffer from low blood pressure. Real stress was way back when I still worked, but I have always had some "nervous" disposition.Quote from: EEVblog on April 15, 2025, 01:25:00 pmCertainly true and as said I have tried several changes, from avoiding all sugars and fats to less radical, but not really targeting a specific item. I know this is something people with irritable bowel syndrome need to do to determine the possible source of their discomfort, like not eating tomatoes or paprika, etc.None of the extensive blood test I have had done over the years shows any deviation of normal. Judged on my blood I'm a perfectly healthy human being. So no detectable inflammatory or other anomalies that could explain my condition.And yet the syndrome is progressive. The pain, stiffness and fatigue increase over time. Sleeping is not a problem. On average I now sleep 10 hours a day. Two hours in the afternoon and 8 during the night. I wake up tired though.Hopefully my new experiment gives some improvement. A bit of an issue is that it takes time to see any benefits and when there are benefits, there is no telling if they are lasting.

author: nctnico
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 08:38:49 pm
content: Quote from: Siwastaja on April 15, 2025, 06:25:48 pmYep. But just stick to eating what is recommended by WHO (or local equivalent) and don't leave certain types of food out long term. Humans are hunters & gatherers so our bodies are designed for a diverse diet.

author: nctnico
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 08:41:43 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 12:17:25 pmHow boring. I wouldn't trade having kids for anything else. Unfortunately they are young adults now soon to leave the nest.Too bad about your illness. Only advice I can give is to keep talking about it to people and try to deduce viable options to feel better from all the information.

author: Ground_Loop
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 09:33:45 pm
content: I'm an engineer, physicist and avid electronics hobbyist.Been married almost 30 fabulous years with two grown daughters in STEM graduate studies. My wife is an administrator with a large consulting firm and very non technical.Nearly all the engineers--except for the recent grads--that I work with are in similar life situations. So, I don't believe single is destiny.

author: tszaboo
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:00:38 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 12:10:15 pmIt's probably your testosterone levels. IDK why we don't keep track of it, and why it's something that gets ignored. It's probably a more important measure than blood pressure.

author: Bud
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 15, 2025, 11:30:00 pm
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 15, 2025, 12:04:26 pmWho is going to inherit your box of wall wart power supplies?

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 12:26:42 am
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 15, 2025, 12:04:26 pmAbsolutely more than made up for by the extra income.Kids are awesome BTW. They give you a sense of pride, something to live and work for, you get to live your childhood and life again through them, and you get to leave a legacy.I actually feel sorry for anyone who doesn't or can't have have kids.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 09:40:22 am
content: Quote from: nctnico on April 15, 2025, 08:41:43 pmI'm 43, single and will have paid off my mortgage by the age of 47, if nothing goes wrong. I could then semi-retire, if I wanted to, but won't.As far as children are concerned, I would like children, but have no interest in finding a partner, so that pretty much excludes that possibility. I don't understand why people get partnered/married and don't want children. Fair enough, if they can't, but it just seems odd. There again, I'm odd for having no interest in finding a partner.

author: asmi
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 04:09:29 pm
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 15, 2025, 11:56:20 amThat's all is well and good while you're relatively healthy. But what's gonna happen if you wake up one day and realize that you can't even move your hands to call 911? Or you're having a heart attack/stroke and there is nobody to help you or even call for help (and in these situations every second can be a difference between life and death)? Or you've got into some kind of accident and as a result of injures now require assistance doing some of everyday tasks which you used to be able to do by yourself? It's situations like these is when you learn the real value of relationship.

author: TimFox
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 04:15:36 pm
content: Quote from: asmi on April 16, 2025, 04:09:29 pmNow that we are both retired (having gotten older), there have been several incidents where one of us had to help the other to emergency medical care (in both directions).

author: BradC
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 04:18:27 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 16, 2025, 12:26:42 amAnd as a bonus I get to buy all the toys I always wanted but could never have. There's something special about sitting down with a kid and answering the question "So how does the gearbox in the car work?" by pulling out the box of LEGO and building one.Even simple stuff like experimenting with Propane/Oxy gas mixes to see which ones shoot the bottle across the yard like a rocket and which ones blow it open. Dad 101.I'd never get away with this stuff if it wasn't in the name of education.

author: tom66
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 04:30:31 pm
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 16, 2025, 09:40:22 amA friend of mine is a 'foster weekender', a growing trend apparently, they pretty much just have a kid who is in care for the weekend to give them some fun outside of the norm. They are not in a long term relationship, having divorced. Might be worth considering if you want to be more involved with bringing up a kid but don't feel like you have the time/resources to commit to having them full time.

author: hans
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 04:48:20 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 15, 2025, 12:10:15 pmFrom my own experience, I start to more belief that biological imbalances inside the human brain is still massively overlooked and misunderstood in today's society.GP's are quick to dismiss health issues to stress. Society is quick to judge people on their actions and behaviours. "Get some therapy and you'll be fine!", and if that doesn't work, I'm sure there is some mindfulness, yoga, running group, vitamin/mineral pill, eBook, cream or "dopamine detox" (which often revolves around 'grow some discipline') that surely will fix my "brain health".Sure, conservative talk/lifestyle improvements are always better than (in extreme case) surgery. But then I also see a lot of these skeptics blame modern psychiatric medications for having "too little proof" that they actually fix something with the serotonin receptors, and are just a giant cash grab from pharmaceuticals. Meanwhile, we have incredibly effective medications for actual biological problems, such as migraine..Having battled my own fair share of "brain health problems" (migraine, mood, musculoskeletal pain), IMO some people just have to live with a fucked up brain chemistry at some point. Its very frustrating when for some things you cannot find a particular trigger or event that caused it.Unfortunately some healthcare professionals can confuse these cause-effect things too. Maybe they want to just write down a few congruent notes and don't want to be challenged on their knowledge all the time? E.g. some can't even agree on the existence of certain diseases neither (such as fibromyalgia or depression being on a spectrum). It can be very tiring. But, good to hear that you have some medications that work for you. I've tried some of those pills as well, but unfortunately, they did me more harm than good.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 05:02:02 pm
content: Quote from: asmi on April 16, 2025, 04:09:29 pmHaving a partner does not always save you from harm. Last Christmas a farmer we knew died of a heart attack at age 48. It happened in a barn some 800 meters from our house. He managed to make a phone call, but help arrived to late. Left a wife and a kid.But yes, in some situations it is very handy to have a partner who can take you to hospital when needed.Quote from: TimFox on April 16, 2025, 04:15:36 pmMe and the misses have had to do it for each other too. Not only for emergencies, but also for exams or some surgery. The wife has both eyes worked on because of cataract. She was very happy that I was there to bring and collect her from the hospital. Was during covid, so I was not allowed to stay.

author: CatalinaWOW
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 05:12:46 pm
content: A random observation. Over my career I worked with quite a few deeply "nerdy" types. Very limited social skills, often not physically attractive, deeply immersed in work. A surprising number of them ended up married and with kids. Those who feel that they can't be involved in the "game" are just wrong.The poll shows that those on this forum seem to divorce less than is reported in the general population.The poll doesn't have any was to identify life stage. I am sure the percentages are different for the guys in their twenties than for those of us in later stages of life. The folks I mentioned in the random observation almost all married after their twenties and none that I am aware of had kids in their twenties.

author: TimFox
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 05:17:00 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 16, 2025, 05:02:02 pmEven for simple eye examinations, it is sometimes difficult to drive oneself home with dilated pupils.Our home motto is "You and me against the world--I like those odds."

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 05:30:02 pm
content: Quote from: hans on April 16, 2025, 04:48:20 pmYes, there is still a lot to discover in not only the brain chemistry, but also the intestines play a big role, which is still not clear. Some researchers think that fibromyalgia has it's cause in that region.There also seems to be some taboo on these syndromes, although burn outs are becoming more and more accepted as real. Stress is a real killer.Quote from: hans on April 16, 2025, 04:48:20 pmUnfortunately yes. For some, medication can mean a return to a fully normal life, but for others it will remain a struggle. For me it seems to be the latter, even though the Duloxetine I take helps with part of the problem, it does not help with the pain, stiffness and the fatigue.Looking back I can see that my ailment probably started way back and slowly grew to what it is now. I noticed that starting with new projects was becoming more of a problem due to lack of focus. It can now take weeks of procrastination before I really get something of the ground.Hopefully your "brain health problems" are fixed.Quote from: hans on April 16, 2025, 04:48:20 pmLast November my rheumatologist wanted me to try a different anti depressant. Milnacipran. At first it seem to stabilize the problems, but a problem that the Duloxetine helped for returned, so I started to take them both, which the doctor at first had suggested, but having to take the Duloxetine in the morning and the Milnacipran in the evening would probably bring back my initial problem with Duloxetine. It gave me some intestinal problems, that went away when I started to take it in the evening. So he told me to stop with the Duloxetine and only take the Milnacipran. Using them both did not seem to give problems at first but recently I started to get more headaches and hot flashes. For this I stopped with the Milnacipran and those side effects are fading away again.Luckily my GP is very good and helpful, even though he does not have a solution either. He accepts my input and even acknowledge that I now probably have deeper insights in the syndrome than he does. I try to stay on top of the research and when something new comes up I discuss it with him to see if I could benefit from it.

author: nctnico
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 05:30:42 pm
content: Quote from: asmi on April 16, 2025, 04:09:29 pmVery true! A single uncle of mine had an accident at home and the bread delivery guy called the emergency services because my uncle didn't collect the bread that was delivered previously. It is estimated that he might have been lying incapacitated in his home for 3 days or so.

author: SteveThackery
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 16, 2025, 09:45:14 pm
content: I realise this is off-topic, but the thread does seem to have forked a sub-thread about mental health issues, and in my case it does relate back to the issue of relationships.I've suffered from "clinical depression" all my adult life. I put it in quotation marks because I wish it had a better name. People who have never suffered it think they know what it is because they have occasionally felt depressed themselves. Unfortunately thediseaseof clinical depression is a million miles away from theemotionof depression. The confusion arising from the illness and the emotion both having the same name despite being vastly different conditions leads to all sorts of difficulties.I think I have had six major "breakdowns" since my illness began at the age of 20. When I get an episode I experience the most desperate, profound, blackest despair combined with truly crippling - physically and mentally - levels of anxiety. In my case an episode might typically last six to eight weeks, and the torture and misery is beyond anything words can describe. I'm telling you this because - as a single person - I am totally reliant on family members taking me in and keeping me fed, watered and supervised. It is completely impossible to handle it on my own.If I were in a loving relationship and living with someone I would be much safer and significantly more able to tolerate the illness, because suffering clinical depression and anxiety is terrifying when you are alone. At my last bout I was sent off to live with my brother and his wife for ten weeks, which was truly a life saver. Unfortunately my brother died last year so that option is not open to me any more.Anyway, I've bored you enough. I just wanted to contribute to the conversation around the disadvantages of living alone. And yet when I am well, I am totally content to live alone, and actually greatly prefer it.

author: SiliconWizard
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 17, 2025, 12:24:43 pm
content: True but if you only get to meet people through your classes and later on, your job, then you may have a bigger overall problem than just finding a mate. Not saying that as a lecture of any kind, just a thought.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 07:21:49 am
content: Quote from: SteveThackery on April 16, 2025, 09:45:14 pmAre you sure it's not open any more? Assuming your brother's widow hasn't remarried, she might appreciate company. In any one of several senses.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 08:23:00 am
content: Quote from: asmi on April 16, 2025, 04:09:29 pmIndeed. For an example of this, look at Dianna Cowern, "Physics Girl" on Youtube. Or at least she was until she got all sorts of "long covid" related problems that have made her completely bed ridden for years now. Her husband has been doing everything for herI work in my lab alone, but I know if I'm not home by dinner time, someone is going to come searching for me.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 08:27:09 am
content: Quote from: Siwastaja on April 15, 2025, 06:25:48 pmCorrect, it's worth trying.And most people say they try, but they actually don't, they aren't disciplined and thorough enough.There is no safer experiment than changing your diet, but you have to go the whole hog.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 10:17:27 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 18, 2025, 08:27:09 amI wouldn't say that. Diet is very important. Get it wrong and consequences can be dire.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 11:06:59 am
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 18, 2025, 10:17:27 amYeah, that's the point, test if you have it wrong.Way safer than experimenting with drugs.

author: Nominal Animal
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 12:33:03 pm
content: Diet is absolutely crucial. For those with any kind of issues, there is a very interesting recent open access paper,Myths and Facts Regarding Low-Carbohydrate Diets(https://doi.org/10.3390/nu17061047).I, too, suffer from recurrent major depressive disorder. For me, it's like losing the ability to perceive anything positive, or even to think logically. For a few years now I've been on simultaneous maximum doses of duloxetineandescitalopram, plus small dose (1g/day) of E-EPA (ethyl eicosapentaenoic acid) as a supplement/support. My body chemistry is a bit weird, as SSRIs don't seem to produce any negative side effects, simply lose their efficacy, whereas the "packing" material has a very big effect (especially which sugar alcohols are used – xylitol and sorbitol are fine, maltitol and mannitol have strong side effects; very likely due to the types of gastrointestinal bacteria I have).Reducing carbohydrates and emphasising proteins (especially whey protein, low-sugar quark) and using lactic acid fermented milk products (viili) has made a significant improvement. Using a diary to record exact honest results is absolutely crucial! Otherwise, surface opinions will affect what you remember, and thus yield a non-factual impression of the suitability of each diet.Most of the serotonin –– which is believed to be a key in mood disorders –– in the human body is produced by specializedenterochromaffincells in the epithelium cells in the lining of the gastrointestinal tract. Those cells also control the motility and secretions. This alone binds depression due to imbalance in brain serotonin chemistry and food intake and digestion inextricably together. In any case, there is a direct connection between gastrointestinal tract and brain chemistry; this is not in question, although the details of exactly what and how that works is still under research.Another neurotransmitter involved in all this is dopamine, which is more active in the "reward" pathways in the brain. One of the easiest ways to increase dopamine in the brain is exercise. For some but not all types of depression dopamine can "override" the serotonin-related problems, and thus exercise overcome depression. For almost all it willhelp–– to simplify, acts like a positive reward/boost ––, just isn't sufficient alone.Currently, there are 14 different serotonin receptors known (with the actual total probably being in the two dozen region). Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors like escitalopram (and serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors like duloxetine) work by selectively blocking certain types of receptors, so that the limited amount of serotonin (and norepinephrine) available will act on the desired receptors instead. Because the early growth and adaptation phase in the human brain is via cell apoptosis –– that is, we are born with excessive amounts of connections, and the early age learning burst is powered by trimming down the unwanted ones –– although new connections are made all through ones life, the exact distribution of these receptors is unique to each individual. This means that SSRI/SNRI medication is extremely dependent on the individual, with only gross/approximate help from statistical inferences –– completely opposite to most medication!That also means that each individual requiring SSRI/SNRI medication to balance their brain chemistry will have to find out the medication or combination that works best for that individual. Because of the receptor variance, even side effects are utterly dependent on the individual! Unfortunately, it also means that to find the best medication or combination, one needs to work closely with their medical professional, recordingbrutally honestlythe perceptions and observed changes; and since most changes to the serotonin/norepinephrine cycles takes a few weeks to stabilize, it is very slow, laborious, and possibly even hopeless-seeming time. Too many people give up too early in this process. For me, it took about three or fouryearsto find a working/lasting combination; I was just lucky in that the worst side effects I've ever gotten were headaches, so it was easier for me to get through that.(It annoys me that there isn't a resource for medical professionals to compare the receptor types and statistics of effects including side effects, to analytically "map" the likely reuptake inhibitor mix that yields the best results for any particular individual. At its core, it is a very simple puzzle: each individual has about two dozen "analog switches" – serotonin receptors – that need to be selectively blocked/hindered, for best effects. Because the amount and distribution varies per individual, each person is a "black box" where we can only infer the "switches" from the effects. Because this is completely opposite to most medication – typically the biological response is the same, and only the human opinion of the biological response varies – most GPs will never do this. The specialists will do this instinctively, without realizing this is exactly what they are doing. I've talked about this with a couple of professionals, but it is not very useful when one is the subject/patient at hand.)While medication can return functionality, therapy is absolutely essential to change the thought and behaviour patterns leading to the problem recurring. It is no different to physical therapy, where antibiotics stop the infection and a cast lets your bones heal; as soon as possible, you need to exercise the muscles and ligaments to not lose mobility. The role of the therapist is that of a guide and a personal coach: the patient themselves must do the work and affect the change. (It is likely that in the future, we'll add psychedelics in the mix, helping to disrupt the unwanted pathways and create/switch to new ones. As it is, we still use electroconvulsive therapy (under anasthesia) for the most difficult cases, and that has its own downsides. Both of these are only effective under careful control; just sticking your tongue to a wall socket or taking some LSD is unlikely to have a positive effect.)The core of my own problem is that I ignored the problems I was having for almost 15 years. During that time, I focused on working and studying, running my own company; even went so far to exclude all "social life", in a very misguided effort into "doing better". Now, a quarter century later, my issues are mostlybiological, with stress hormones wreaking utter havoc, heat and exercise causing vomiting, and weird digestion issues. It is all my fault, deciding to ignore the problem and just forcibly push myself through – even though I didn't even have clear goals or a clear plan forward. Short term survival mode, you could say. By not addressing them, I essentially let them burn into my biological being, instead of handling them as a mental and behavioural problem as I could have.Do not repeat my error. Address your own issues as early as you detect them, as then you have lots of options from diet to social circles to thought patterns and professional help. It is no different to address these as it is to address a broken bone, even though there is a sociocultural bias otherwise.

author: SteveThackery
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 01:45:36 pm
content: Brilliant post, @Nominal Animal.Just a couple of really minor points from my own research and from my experience of over 45 years with the disease.There is still some uncertainty and doubt regarding the role of serotonin in clinical depression. One significant factor is that your serotonin level is boosted around two hours after taking the SSRI, but it takessix to eight weeksfor the user's condition to improve. This implies that there is something else going on other than a shortage of serotonin in the brain. There is a theory that low serotonin levels cause the receptors to die off, and it takes the brain six to eight weeks to regrow them. It sounds credible butthis is sheer speculation which has not yet been proved or disproved.It is also important to point out that SSRIs are pretty rubbish as medication goes.All of thembarely exceed placebo, and typically only the mid-40%s of the patients report a benefit.The fact that SSRIs have different levels of efficacy for different people is still not fully understood. In fact there is at least one antidepressant (tianeptine) that actuallowersthe serotonin in the brain, and yet it has broadly similar efficacy. This may be due to it acting on other aspects of brain chemistry. The fact that thereareother aspects of brain chemistry involved in depression shows that we are nowhere near understanding it fully. It is more than serotonin.I can report what might be a breakthrough for me. Between the ages of 20 and 64 I was treated for anxiety (initially) and then clinical depression. I was on SSRIs for 35 years - almost every brand available in the UK - and I still had severe bouts. I was resigned to the idea that my depression was essentially untreatable. After the most recent bout I was taken to an emergency psychiatrist who diagnosed me withbipolar disorder. In itself it isn't very interesting, but in fact it opens up a whole suite of medications that I hadn't tried before. Having said that, I probably wouldn't have thought of myself as bipolar.I was put on quetiapine (400mg daily) which is an anti-psychotic, but also used as a mood stabiliser. So far I have been completely free of clinical depression, although I can't be fully confident for a few more years.If anyone here has treatment-resistance depression it might be worth mentioning quetiapine (and the other drugs for bipolar) to your psychiatrist, even if you have doubts about whether you really are bipolar or not.

author: temperance
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 02:13:39 pm
content: QuoteI gave up early when they prescribed me SSRI's because I consider those very dangerous. After three months or so some strange things in my general behavior showed up. I started to attack people with words making shreds of who they are and similar things. Family, friends, random people who somehow got in my way. I don't like to admit this. But at that time I felt joy doing that and laugh at them. I never want to experience that again. I've seen this in other people as well that they don't have "proper" boundaries anymore when taking SSRI's as if the world around you doesn't exist. It is not that you are not aware of the world around you but you don't care.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 04:13:55 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 18, 2025, 11:06:59 amIt depends. Changing my diet messed me up more than any drug has done.

author: Nominal Animal
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 04:55:50 pm
content: Quote from: SteveThackery on April 18, 2025, 01:45:36 pmVery true. There is also the blood-brain barrier, which serotonin is believed not to be able to cross, whereas its metabolic precursor tryptophan can.The one thing that fits all the observations is that this is a matter ofbalancein neurotransmitter chemicals, involving receptors whose statistical distribution varies greatly between individuals. (Which, if you know the basics of human/mammalian neurophysics and -chemistry, is obvious: themindis an emergent phenomenon arising from complex interactions, and even though individual functions can be roughly located in specific regions of the brain, they canshiftdue to e.g. trauma.)That may also mean that our current classification system, based on stereotypical symptoms, may not be correct at all. (Consider an analog: using contusions on the skin to try and determine if one has sprained ligaments, broken ligaments, or fractured or broken bone.)Quote from: temperance on April 18, 2025, 02:13:39 pmI disagree only in clumping all SSRI (and/or SNRI) into one group, simply because the different compounds used in them really do target different receptors. It is too generic to model reality well.I fully agree –– and this ties in with what SteveThackery wrote above –– that there are many combinations of SSRI/SNRIs that produce unwanted, possibly dangerous results. Suicidal ideation is quite common, for example. This makes closefactualmonitoring of the effects of SSRI/SNRI families extremely important. The worst thing a doctor can do is offer some pills and tell the client to call next Monday morning. It is the exact same thing as with electroconvulsive therapy and psychedelics: they only apply well in specific situations and to specific persons, and just consuming some chemicals – be they SSRIs or psychedelics or something else – or zapping yourself somehow isn't going to do much good.Also, I think I know what you refer to, too, because for me it was the exact opposite. If I reduce the dosage, I get grumpy in a week or so, and it only gets worse from there. Those feelings are the one thing Ireallydon't want to talk about.Yet, to ignore and do nothing about the issues is always the most wrong option. The earlier you do something about the problems you have, the smaller the corrective action is. I do believe that for those without significant disposition diet and exercise can suffice, if they keep track and care of their mental state somehow. It is when there is sudden great trauma, or the problem festers, that bigger changes and professional help is needed. Even then, stuff like changes in the diet can be crucial, because our internal workings are extremely complex interactions.One really big thing about diet is how it affects the gastrointestinal biota, especially the variety of bacteria we have helping break our food down to more useful chemicals. That, too, tends to be a bit slow, so some issues during a transition period (from say high-carbohydrate to low-carbohydrate diet) do not necessarily mean the target diet is unsuitable. For me, certain strains of lactic acid bacteria and intermittent fasting (depending on physical activity) helps a lot.Quote from: Zero999 on April 18, 2025, 04:13:55 pmIt may not be the diet alone, or even most of the reason; it could have beenhowyou changed your diet. If you just switched from one diet to another, instantaneously without any kind of preparation, no wonder it messed you up.Again, exactly how best to change diets varies from person to person and from diet to another. It is complicated, affecting the biota in your gastrointestinal tract. (Remember, without the bacteria, you will die. The diarrhea from heavy antibiotics kills the gastrointestinal tract and its lining; and in extreme cases, the only option is a fecal transplant.) For significant changes, you'll want to do a multi-step process, carefully and slowly enough so that the biota changes with your diet; and often additional supplements and even bacteria-rich foods (yoghurts and similar) are needed during the transitioning.Slow changes, like reducing something or introducing something slowly, say in the course of a month or two, seem to be the safest. Fasting might be a good idea, too.

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 05:37:30 pm
content: Quote from: Nominal Animal on April 18, 2025, 04:55:50 pmI change to a low carb diet in the hope it would improve my mental health and lose weight. Unfortunately, my mental health deteriorated and I did lose weight, but far too much, to the point of being malnourished. It wasn't instant. I slowly cut out more from my diet and it developed into an eating disorder. I ended up needing to go on fluoxetine to treat my depression and recover properly.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 05:59:45 pm
content: Quote from: Nominal Animal on April 18, 2025, 12:33:03 pmThe whey is "fast" absorption protein, its absorption triggers a high and fast peak of insulin, no ?

author: Nominal Animal
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 06:26:06 pm
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 18, 2025, 05:37:30 pmGlad you recovered. But this shows well how there is no one-rule-fits-all here, because of the individualbiologicaldifferences and variations.And that emphasizes the need of careful factual monitoring of the effects. I suspect it is easier for analytical (conscientious and intellect-oriented) personality types than for social types, too; which means that the cultural/societal bias treating mental disorders differently to physical medical issues is a barrier for seeking help early enough.It is annoying that we don't have any kind of correlation maps (statistical correlations between biological features like genes encoding specific receptor types, and responses to various medications). The result is that the majority of medical professionals work on poor very general statistics, often skewed by financial reasons, with detailed domain knowledge locked in personal experience not easily expressed to others, and us ordinary non-medical-background people basing our understanding on very, very crude rules of thumb and personal experiences, without knowing who to trust (to treat us) and what to believe.The large pharmaceutical companies do not want to support that kind of research, because it would directly cut into their profits and marketing opportunities: they're not in the business ofcures, they developtreatmentsthey can market and sell at a profit. It is not something we can realistically expect commercial companies to do or support at all.Quote from: Coordonnée_chromatique on April 18, 2025, 05:59:45 pmI don't know. I only recently started sampling my blood sugar levels, so I don't have continuous data to detect short peaks, or to compare to, but I definitely feel and "operate" better. My bloodwork has been pretty good except for borderline high blood sugar and cholesterol levels (as in no medication needed, but needs observation), plus always present inflammation markers. Sugar was my vice, though. BMI 25.I suspect there is something wonky in my gastrointestinal tract (due to how major an effect sugar alcohols have in absorption of medicine), so probably am not very typical in this, though. For the reasons in this and previous message, I seriously advice against making too general assumptions and inferences about specific types of proteins/diet having the same effect on all humans, especially because the gastrointestinal biota has such a major effect.

author: SteveThackery
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 06:40:04 pm
content: Quote from: Nominal Animal on April 18, 2025, 04:55:50 pmAnd here is a massive problem.There is no objective test for clinical depression.There is no blood test that will diagnose it, it cannot be diagnosed by EEG, or by any of the imaging technologies (CAT, MRI, PET), including fMRI.Obviously researchers and medics try for objective data, and usually this takes the form of questionnaires whereby the patient rates themselves against established criteria. Also medics can attempt to produce objective data based on their own observations of the patient. But ultimately this is subjective data as it relies on how the patient reports their feelings, or on the subjective opinion of the medic.An objective and reliable test for depression, to a degree suitable for diagnosis, would be a massive step forward and might well transform the whole field of psychiatry.As an aside, it should also be useful to distinguish between people who feel depressed (which is a normal and healthy response to adverse circumstances), and those who suffer clinical depression (which is an inappropriate and unhealthy mental state, often independent of circumstances).

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 07:02:12 pm
content: Quote from: Nominal Animal on April 18, 2025, 06:26:06 pmTractus is mostly impacted by the volume of fibers inside IMHO, they will inflam your intestine if they are too much and hard, the better ones are water soluble because they are very gentle with the mucous membrane.The gastrointestinal biota have two poles, putrefaction and fermentation, it takes months to change it.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 07:14:24 pm
content: Based on Nominal Animal his writings it is clear that every person is different and medication might not work for some, but does for others. I can confirm to this based on my own experiences. Supplements that others had beneficial results with did little to nothing for me. Also placebo effect is a factor. With my syndrome it is very difficult to keep track of if there is improvement, stabilization or degradation. With the first anti depressant that I was prescribed on, seemed to stabilize things at first, but after several months the effect wore off. So did trials with other remedies.As to early on intervention, since my decay was very very slow at first, I can't see a point in time where I should have taken action. Sure I had an early age burn out (~27 years) and was prescribed basically just rest. Maybe I should have went to a psychologist or psychiatrist when I almost had my second burnout, but that was not very common back then.It was only in 2014 that I started noticing physical problems, which I at first thought to be heart and vascular related. So went in for a checkup at a cardiologist, but nothing was found wrong. He did advise to do daily walks, which I followed up on. This was also the trigger to give up on massive sugar intake. In 2017 I started to notice other problems like headaches I never had before and even more shortness of breath, stiffer muscles and cracking sounds in my knees. Based on these symptoms I had a CT and a MRI scan of my head, and x-rays of my back and knees. Revealed nothing wrong. In 2018 I was diagnosed with CFS/FM. Since then it is downhill despite all kinds of experimenting with food, supplements and medicines.The depression became visible a couple of years back when the physical effects started to wear me down. Even had suicidal thoughts. Based on this my GP started me on Duloxetine, and that helps me a lot mood wise.The question with it all is the same as the chicken and the egg. Is the mental part caused by the physical decline, or vise versa, or totally unrelated. Luckily the research all around the world into the syndromes falling under the CFS umbrella is being intensified. Hopefully one day some team discovers the why and the how to resolve it.

author: hans
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 10:37:54 pm
content: Quote from: SteveThackery on April 18, 2025, 01:45:36 pmYes, Seroquel (the brand name) is quite an interesting drug. Its also quite a powerful anti-histamine.I use it as a sleeping aid (16 hours of sleep anyone?) or to help with overstimulation. But it is also used for depression and mood stabilization.I wrote a few posts ago that "brain health" is overlooked. I say that because mood and emotion are quite distinct, yet some people can confuse some congruent lasting sadness for depression.Once you monitor yourself for a while, it can become quite apparent when some things pop up. For example, I consider myself clinically depressed whenever my sleep quality tanks. I often don't have trouble falling asleep. But when I'm feeling low, I'll usually have more sleepwalking, sudden awakenings at night, or sleeping through alarm clocks.That adds to the anhedonia and psychological fatigue. My symptoms fit to "atypical depression", meaning also a high amount of mood reactivity. E.g. I am excited to go to work or friends, but once I stabilize my baseline mood is just trash. Despite its name, that kind of depression is actually quite common and not atypical at all.During the years, I've tried several SSRIs, SNRIs and TCAs. They all had some annoying side effects, but in general most of them did similar things to me: they often don't seem to do much for 2-3 weeks, except make me very irritable at worst, then suddenly I'll get incredibly energetic/wired for a week or so, and then the med stops working and I only have nasty side effects (e.g. insomnia).Actually, I noticed at some point that these mood issues were very similar in a migraine attack. Typically my mood tanks before an attack, I take a Sumatriptan to stop the attack, and then I can feel wired and not sleep all night.At some point, this was happening every week for several days or so. Also considering my nasty experience with antidepressants, I've started to look into bipolar as well. In Dutch literature I've often seen bipolar described as a disturbance in the energy producer for the nervous system. Too low, depressed. Too high, hypomania.And why it happens? I read some recent research that links it to a second body clock which is inactive in most brains. Migraines (and often cluster headaches too) can also be often linked to body clock stuff. The comorbidity of these diseases is remarkably high. I'm fairly certain mine are very closely related.For me hypomania looks like outragious cleaning outbursts.. very productive project days (I'll literally complete a weeks of work in 1-2 days).. having an entertaining train of thought with ambitious ideas.But it also has a dark side: mind can't shutdown, so good luck sleeping. I will wake up before the alarm clock and feel fine on <=4 hrs of sleep (which is half of my normal). I can also get incredibly INCREDIBLY short tempered. Angry with everything and everyone that doesn't suit me. Stuff that stops working because of some quirks? Well.. cave man mode unleashed. It's not safe for me to workout at this point. I'll be working out at my max HR and still not feel satisfied as giving enough.The worst are "mixed episodes" for me. Example (Trigger Warning): crossing the street at a pedestrian crossing which is notorious for cars speeding/not stopping. So you cross without looking as you're already pissed off at the thought of a car that might brake (too) late as its their fault for doing so.Its quite well known that SSRIs can trigger episodes of (hypo)mania in bipolar people. Some people only get manic episodes by these medication side effects. Others may have to avoid stimulants (caffeine etc.). But IMO far more tricky is that GP's will often prescribe SSRIs as a first line treatment as the psychiatric care system is clogged up in many countries, even though bipolar disorder is not even that uncommon of a disorder, which is a bit of a risk when its not closely monitored by a psychiatrist.

author: Benta
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 18, 2025, 11:22:52 pm
content: Somehow the way this thread has evolved demonstrates the title.I call it "inverse darwinism". Intelligent people don't breed, morons do. You don't have to look far to see the results.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 12:16:07 am
content: Quote from: Benta on April 18, 2025, 11:22:52 pmSo I'm a moron, along with 46% of the people here?

author: CatalinaWOW
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 02:08:10 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 19, 2025, 12:16:07 amActually along with 55% who either have or want kids.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 02:20:08 am
content: Quote from: CatalinaWOW on April 19, 2025, 02:08:10 amYes, well over half!You know, the people who keep the species going...Most western countries have a population crisis. Having kids should be celebrated and rewarded.

author: MrMobodies
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 03:14:50 am
content: I don't regard myself technically minded but curious and it doesn't take much to see the problems.When I came home from a school 200 miles away back to this horrid place Essex after 4 years in over 20 years ago, I was approached by this yob who remembered me at the bus stop that I forgot about at in one of the schools there. He had this brown paper bag with a beer in it and shouted my name (in his yobbish voice/low pitched repeatedly) as he was approached me as if he was supporting a football match. He asked me if I seen any "birds" lately. I said, yes and I had just got this Olympus C770 camera to take pictures of them in the garden, there are the magpies, the pigeons which fight a lot.... he interrupted and said "No!... no!... Girls!.... Girls!.." whilst stamping his foot on the pavement in frustration. I told him what I was up to and behaved all respectfully then his wife walked past him with a dual? pram populated by babies who were asleep, they went across the road, sat on a council flat wall near the shops and started arguing about money and now that made me sick. A big contrast to how they behave in the area I was staying at.I hear terrible things about divorce. In 2018 Polish couple with 2 toddlers across the road ran out of money, engaged in and argument and the husband walked out and divorced and she was forced to sell the house. When I moved in 2019 this man was selling his very large hotel very cheaply (on the main road but with no garden). The wife left, divorced and wanted half and he was forced to sell it.The folks mainly men at the local pub who split up with their wives or girlfriends (mainly the younger lot) who appeared all happy at first and to see them come in so rock bottom makes me wonder what's the point. A young lad split up from his girlfriend last week and felt sorry for him. It seemed to be working very well at first, this lady had a young daughter but they had an argument and left.I realize now by observing them, and what they tell me, that with how I appear, the way I may speak, the things I do and how I do them where I am perceived as odd by others and avoided (even though most of my ideas do work in the end) and that maybe my saving grace from all that.Anyway even back in the 2010's I am on no position for that, that's nothing to me as I a have been betrayed and quite disillusioned with so many of other things. You do work for civil service and companies, the staff they tell you go above and beyond, I put in all my effort, and they to try to get me a job there for another set of people above who don't even work there but behind a ticketing system elsewhere in the country, criticize things like, your background/disabilities etc can't meet, area. school, qualifications and then fob get fobbed off excuses, despite requesting things like an enhanced background check which comes back blank and I am not even criminal and wonder what's the point spending many grueling weeks working in places for the outcome to be the same despite being promised things no matter how hard you work how much you get done.In 2017, I was so angry I wanted to run in towards of a train in anger and perish because that was what I took home. Not out of self pity to perish but anger and frustration being constantly told I am not good enough (no relation to work) but I couldn't bring myself to do it. You think of the driver has to remember that for the rest of their life. That was how I felt at the time.Thanks to Dave Jones showing stuff on Youtube, how it works, how it was designed, what corners were cut to save pennies, things I always wanted to see how they work but turned away at my younger years due to the same attitude as above now that gave me some hope.I have seen people in worse condition with no roof over their heads when I moved, homeless people and those living in tents. I noticed a place called Elly in Cambridgeshire, according to articles had three food banks. I went there in 2021 to buy some luxury cheese in Waitrose and it had one in there. Now I can see why they had three food banks in the area. When I saw the many beggers and tents outside it made me sick and I thought I better not buy the cheese and gave them some money on the way back to the car. There is a chapel across the road open charging £10 or so offering tea and biscuits according to a sign and it was raining and hardly saw anyone through the doors and they could have been catering for these beggers. I was so put off I hadn't been back there.The charities I had been signposted to, seem to make money by signposting to other charities where they try to get me to fill out forms so they can claim more money off the government all for them to signpost me to somewhere else that'd do the same. The last few (which I complained about) wanted me to claim for "mental health" illness which I do not have for their "jobs and skills training" when all they do was send folks to mental health classes and expect them to look for work they may never get.So now I spend most of my time enjoying what I can.

author: hans
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 05:51:16 am
content: Quote from: Benta on April 18, 2025, 11:22:52 pmPerhaps intelligent people also consider whether a disease will run in families or is an individual case.Some diseases affect only people at old age (e.g. lots of my uncles passed because of heart and vascular diseases), while others affect your whole life.For the latter, if my children would only receive 1% of it, I would choose to rather not have them.. to save them the trouble.

author: EggertEnjoyer123
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 06:27:06 am
content: Quote from: Benta on April 18, 2025, 11:22:52 pmI really don't understand why it's intelligent to not breed. Personally I'm the exact opposite, I want to have a big family (like at least 5 kids), and I know a handful of people from my school who also want that. (Yes, I understand that I will be able to buy less test equipment if I have to spend more money on kids.)Then again I'm fresh out of school, so I still need to get married first. Don't want to be like Elon Musk and have a ton of kids with a ton of women, and then not being able to spend time with them all.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 06:29:54 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 19, 2025, 02:20:08 amThis is debatable.There are more things to consider than keeping the species going. The waste of resources for instance, that is increased when there are lots more people around.Also here in Europe, the so called population crisis, is based on there being to many old people, and to few younger people to bring in the money to support the pensions of the old people. It is all based on the, in my eyes stupid, economic system that is based on ever lasting growth. The problem with the human kind is that we are not capable of balance. It is always shifting from one end to the other, instead of a nice sustainable middle ground balance.The old people problem can fade out over time with proper population management, but that is something no politician wants to burn his fingers on.With a better management of asylum seekers, there also would be less need for extra kids.I don't have a proper solution for all these problems either, but the way things are now, is not going to be solved by making more people.Another misconception I see is the assumption that dump people only produce dumb children. That the children are not able to develop to their full potential is more related to nurture and lack of education. Here is an opportunity that is being missed out on due to budget cuts. Education is deteriorating when one reads what is in the news.Quote from: CatalinaWOW on April 19, 2025, 02:08:10 amMake that ~65%, because the single people with a wish for kids, and the ones that are divorced that have kids, also need to be taken into account.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 06:31:07 am
content: Quote from: EggertEnjoyer123 on April 19, 2025, 06:27:06 amNot just that you will have less money to spend on test equipment, you will also have less time to play with the equipment.

author: David Hess
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 07:19:43 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 19, 2025, 06:31:07 amWe discussed that on the Tekscopes mailing list almost a decade ago, and the idea is far older. My response was inspired by Stan Freberg's Dr. Herman Horn:A home electronic lab is the most fundamental of human needs and no home can be without it. In spite of what your wife says, ignore it. Ignore it! All women are troublemakers who would like to take the money their husbands need desperately for a new and better oscilloscope, and selfishly squander it on things like: shoes for the children, homogenized milk, or perhaps a second dress. They can sit there and watch their husbands suffer with equipment which has been obsolete for at least four decades, and deny him the three decade old 7000 oscilloscope mainframe system he needs soooo badly.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 07:27:19 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 19, 2025, 06:29:54 amMen are talking to others men, and women have decided to develop their personnal skills instead of having children.They've discovered that having children is as hard that have a work and they must perform it without any salary

author: BradC
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 08:15:07 am
content: Quote from: Benta on April 18, 2025, 11:22:52 pmJust because "procreation favours the stupid" doesn't mean that plenty of intelligent people shouldn't make a conscious choice to continue their genetic line.Having kids was probably the best choice my wife and I made and I'm quite proud of how my lad is turning out.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 09:07:42 am
content: Quote from: hans on April 19, 2025, 05:51:16 amAnother thing to consider at this point in time, what kind of future does your kid have.Will society crumble and collapse, throwing us all back into the stone age. There has always been some instability, but at the moment with so many wars and terrorism, I don't like the odds.

author: David Hess
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 11:51:26 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 19, 2025, 09:07:42 amMaybe it is the solution to the Fermi paradox.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 12:15:17 pm
content: Quote from: David Hess on April 19, 2025, 11:51:26 amI found a nice video on this:

author: Psi
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 12:42:57 pm
content: Compared to the general public, smart/technical people are often a lot more particular about needing to find the right sort of person to have kids with. If they can't find that sort of person they are more likely to just not have kids.

author: NiHaoMike
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 02:20:55 pm
content: Quote from: David Hess on April 19, 2025, 07:19:43 amMy answer to that is to seek out gamer girls. There's a big overlap in hardware needed for a good gaming PC and a large data analysis machine.BTW, lately I found that I use a cheap FX2 MSO much more often than my proper scope. Kind of like the difference between a (still image only) DSLR and an old 480i video camera. The DSLR can capture an image with far more detail, if it manages to capture at the right moment. The video camera just needs to be recording to get something from the scene.

author: BadeBhaiya
author_rank: Regular Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 02:56:25 pm
content: QuoteI sure hope notQuoteIn my observation, it's also poor social skills which leads to missed opportunities.In my personal view, the whole courting process looks silly and a massive waste of time and effort. The end result may be worth it i guess?

author: bte
author_rank: Regular Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 03:05:27 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 19, 2025, 12:16:07 amMaybe a distinction is made between having kids vs breeding:

author: langwadt
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 06:16:09 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 19, 2025, 06:29:54 ameconomics is only half the problem. Pensioners don't stop using roads, needing water, electricity, food etc. etc. If there is not a enough working age people to maintain society and all the other stuff that needs to be done money doesn't help

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 06:35:25 pm
content: Quote from: langwadt on April 19, 2025, 06:16:09 pmTrue, but in that case society will crumble even sooner.On the other hand, there are lots of older people that would like to work, but are not able to find any jobs, because employers feel they are a burden or to expensive.Human mentality is most likely the biggest problem in it all. Maybe going extinct is not that bad after all. See the video on the Fermi paradox.

author: themadhippy
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 06:50:12 pm
content: QuoteThe way most state pensions are funded would be classed as illegal in most other cases,using the current payments to pay previous contributors sounds very much like a some sort of pyramid scheme.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 07:02:31 pm
content: Quote from: themadhippy on April 19, 2025, 06:50:12 pmThis is in the Netherlands what theAOWis based on. Beside this, one can also have a company pension build up over the working years. The government has been fiddling with the latter lately not making things better for the pensioner in my opinion.Since I left the Netherlands before my AOW age, I will be deducted 2% for every year that I have been out of the Netherlands. I made my own provisions to not be dependent on this AOW though.

author: NiHaoMike
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 11:39:33 pm
content: Quote from: themadhippy on April 19, 2025, 06:50:12 pmSame goes for Social Security in the US, that said it's going to be difficult to phase the system out without screwing over those who have already made contributions and are expecting to get it back. Maybe massively tax unhealthy processed food, which would not only provide funding but also significantly reduce old age medical expenses?

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 19, 2025, 11:46:23 pm
content: Quote from: NiHaoMike on April 19, 2025, 11:39:33 pmThat would increase old age medical expenses.If you wanted to reduce old age medical expenses then you would make smoking compulsory.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 12:28:47 am
content: Quote from: themadhippy on April 19, 2025, 06:50:12 pmThis is why Australia implemented a compulsory superannuation scheme, currently at 11%. Every worker gets 11% of their wage put away into an investment retirement fund you can't (generally) touch until you at retirement age.Even for self employed people like me, it's compulsory.Of course now the government see it as a free honey pot and they let people take some out during covid and now for a deposit on a home.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 12:36:21 am
content: Quote from: BradC on April 19, 2025, 08:15:07 amIndeed, smart people are able to think long term and realise that having kids has huge advantages when you get older.Name an older person who regrets having kids, I'll wait.On the other hand, you can find countless people who didn't have kids and regretted it. The 2nd and 3rd wave feminists literally do book and lecture tours talking about it.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 06:14:11 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 20, 2025, 12:36:21 amHaving kids is no guarantee that they will take care of you when you are old. Most probably will, but it is no guarantee. Some might even actively help you down the drain to get their inheritance.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 06:45:21 am
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 20, 2025, 06:14:11 amNot having kidsguaranteesno one who will care to look after you.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 07:07:51 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 20, 2025, 06:45:21 amTrue, and that is when the mailman finds you smelling up the place after days, weeks or months.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 10:00:15 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 20, 2025, 06:45:21 am6.3ft and 190lbs and was unable to put my grandpa on its bed after falling on the floor because there was not enough space between the walls and the bed for a good position to lift him properly. I've been constrained to ask for some help to someone for the legs, i've pushed my muscles to their limits to succeed.I you want some child to take care, 2 or more is better IMOPS : i will very probably die poor and alone, love is a gift for nothing at all.

author: nctnico
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 03:53:39 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 20, 2025, 06:45:21 amSorry, but that is not true. Most people have friends and family to take care of them. I've seen that often enough. You'd have to be an utter anti-social bastard to end up all alone without help (and likely any offspring is going to leave you to rot as well) .

author: Zero999
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 05:27:32 pm
content: Quote from: nctnico on April 20, 2025, 03:53:39 pmThat's certainly true. My mum who is quite elderly herself, at the gate of 76 often helps to care for her 100 year old neighbour.

author: Psi
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 20, 2025, 10:28:21 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 20, 2025, 06:45:21 amNa, you're usually better off with kids verse without kids in that respect, but it is in no way a guarantee of anything.At any points a grown up child can get into drugs and then swindle their elderly parents out of all their retirement money. Not saying that happens a lot, just that having kids is no guarantee of a secure and happy retirement .

author: CatalinaWOW
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 21, 2025, 04:22:19 am
content: The joy is in the journey, and whatever path you take there are no guarantees. My children have brought me great joy, though I never got a good night's sleep after they were born. I have often threatened that sometime in my future they will be changing my diapers, but the reality is that their lives will probably prevent that. And I do know people whose kids have done terrible things to them.The impact on home electronics labs is as stated above. I basically stopped for twenty + years.In spite of all that I recommend having kids to anyone who asks. It is not really what I expected before we started but has been rewarding in many different ways.

author: hans
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 21, 2025, 09:36:54 am
content: Having kids is indeed very beneficial at later stages in life. I have a few (close&dear) uncles that didn't have kids, and their negligence in hoarding crap (because nobody told them to stop..) has spilled over to me and my in-laws. Especially after 1 had a CVA and the other passed away unexpectedly and we had to throw outhundreds of cubic metersof worthless shit -- except for of course a few precious (but neglected) possessions that were stored in a shoebox somewhere in a cupboard.To all the hoarders (which was also past me): its okay to have a hobby and collect stuff, but make sure its organized, we can easily find what is valuable or has collector value. If it gets to point you're just stacking boxes.. just stop and get help.That situation is a real mess when they are around the same age as my parents. It put a real strain on the whole family and me and my in-laws capability to plan our own lives. Well, unless we say "no", but I'm fairly sure we'll get removed from their inheritance testament. Although, perhaps we are also getting bribed at this point.I think this point ties into something else that is getting far more common in NL (and other western countries): euthanasia. Some people don't really fancy regressing at old age, especially nasty diseases like neurodegeneration or CVA's where people cannot make independent choices and arrangements anymore. As someone that is still quite young, it feels weird to think about a conscious choice about 'this is enough' but perhaps in the bigger picture it can make sense. If prepared well in time, it also gives ample time to arrange everything while still being present in the moment.

author: Chris Jones
author_rank: Regular Contributor
timestamp: April 26, 2025, 01:56:08 pm
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 16, 2025, 09:40:22 amYou could consider private sperm donation to a known recipient, possibly with some co-parenting agreement. There are online groups for this where there seem to be not enough donors for the number of prospective recipients. You'd want to check out the laws in the country where you live, and to learn more about it for example you could join the facebook groups e.g. spermdonationaustralia or the equivalent where you live. It's not something I have any personal experience of, and not something to rush into without a lot of thought, but it might suit you, and make someone else happy too.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 04:59:39 am
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 16, 2025, 09:40:22 amI have a friend who is younger (married+two kids) and currently very interested in the whole "retire early" thing, and is trying to convince me that the whole "5% rule" is absolutely guaranteed to work, and thinks I'm crazy for not doing it.I can't convince him that the real world usually doesn't work like that, and throws up curve balls you didn't expect ,especially when you have kids and you might want to help them out.I can understand if you hate your job and career and want to get out, but what would I do in "retirement"? I'd still be hanging out in the lab and making videos, so I might as well keep taking money if it's on the table.QuoteCompanionship, sex of course, dual incomes, split expenses, and it's also a way to give your money away when you are gone or divorced, without the government getting a cut of it.Scott Adams (the Dilbert guy) famously does this, he wants to give away his wealth but he can't without Uncle Sam taking it as either gift tax or inheritance tax, but there is no tax divorce settlements. So he marries a young instagram model he likes, has a few good years, they get amicably divorced and he's happy that she got set up well without a cut going to Uncle Sam.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 05:19:54 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 27, 2025, 04:59:39 amAhhh .. really? He seems more bitter about Kristina (and women in general) than you'd expect if it was a deliberate strategy to screw Uncle Sam.His first wife was only 10 years younger, which is pretty normal. Kristina is 30 years younger.But hey, my current gf is 36 1/2 years younger than me (she's almost 26, though was 24 when we met) and I'm poor and nowhere near as buff as Scott. The three or four before that were around a 10 year gap, but there were a couple of ~20 year gaps when I was in my 40s.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 06:48:48 am
content: Quote from: brucehoult on April 27, 2025, 05:19:54 amYes, he has specifically mentioned this. You have to listen to the daily streams to hear this stuff.

author: Halcyon
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 09:51:21 am
content: Quote from: Zero999 on April 16, 2025, 09:40:22 amI'm gay, and last I checked, my partner is too.We have family and friends with children and whilst it's nice to visit, "fuck that" is the strong resounding reason why we will never have kids. From a personal perspective, I just don't have the desire, or see the need to pass on my genes. My genes are hardly any more special or unique compared to the billions of other people on this planet. From a more selfish point of view, we like nice things.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 11:08:23 am
content: Quote from: Halcyon on April 27, 2025, 09:51:21 amI have nice things, and I have kids.Not to mention that kids are the nicest things of all. Wouldn't give up my kids for any material possesion.Bonus is you get to relive your youth through them.Highly recommended, 5 stars.

author: Psi
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 12:36:21 pm
content: Finding someone you would enjoy spending the rest of your life with is not always a high enough bar to have kids with that person. To have kids the person needs a whole extra level up entirely from that.So I think that may be part of the reason for less kids today vs 30 years ago.I don't think people made that distinction back then.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 02:13:54 pm
content: Quote from: Psi on April 27, 2025, 12:36:21 pmIt's a lot to do with how the women have been convinced that having a career over kids is way better idea.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 03:34:46 pm
content: Quote from: Halcyon on April 27, 2025, 09:51:21 amWhy would it be selfish to not have kids?I have heard this before, and I can easily turn this around too. There is no way that a new human being can ask or give consent to being made. It is just done, and sometimes willy nilly, without any thought of what kind of life the kid may have.So it is just as selfish, from that point of view, to have kids. People decide to make kids for their own pleasure so to speak.Quote from: EEVblog on April 27, 2025, 11:08:23 amI don't need kids to stay one myself.

author: nctnico
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 03:51:43 pm
content: Quote from: pcprogrammer on April 27, 2025, 03:34:46 pmYou are overthinking this massively. The sole purpose of your existence is to have kids. That is the way nature works. Everything else is just frills.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 05:58:52 pm
content: Quote from: nctnico on April 27, 2025, 03:51:43 pmBut that is why god gave us a brain, to think.* I'm an atheist, but don't practice it any more.

author: Coordonnée_chromatique
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 07:43:20 pm
content: Quote from: nctnico on April 27, 2025, 03:51:43 pmThe sole purpose of your existence is to live... and have children if it is financially and environmentally sustainable.

author: Xena E
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 10:00:26 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 27, 2025, 02:13:54 pmDoesn't have to be that way, its not a Chinese restaurant menu with an either/or choice.I had my daughter at 17 and whilst she was pre school did the OU with the full support of my daughters father. I found that being a mother to an infant /toddler needed full attendance but not full intelect ,so the course was a welcome non distraction.While my daughter was still in elementary school we lost her father in a car wreck.I was able to grow up with my daughter, and she brought me so much joy, and now before I've left my thirties, she has found her own someone special, and has given me a beautiful little granddaughter.Making electrons do fancy shit for a living may be rewarding, but there's been nothing more joyful in my life than my daughter and granddaughter.And now for the divergence from normal human instincts/societies expectations.As for long term relationships, I don't see the need to live in anyones pocket anymore, I could have seen myself sticking at the LTR deal with my daughter's dad, but since he passed it hasn’t seemed worth the effort: there's a lot of options and variety out there for the inquisitive to try... I've got a great BF at the moment but we both like our space, or, at least he respects mine, so there's a kind of permanence to the relationship based on seeing each other at weekends by mutual agreement, and not hanging around each other 24/7 until the boredom of familiarity sets in... there will be no more kids now by choice, so I don't need the perceived security of the LTR. My daughter lives nearby, and I don't fear the Cream Cracker Under the Settee scenario in later life either.X

author: nctnico
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 10:55:20 pm
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 27, 2025, 02:13:54 pmI don't think that is true. To begin with: I'm sure a lot of women are not very interested in doing only household stuff. Would you accept a situation where it is expected by default for you to stay at home? I don't think so. Secondly life has become very expensive in many countries which requires both partners to have decent jobs just to stay afloat financially. The latter also affects whether it is affordable to have kids at all. In addition, many countries have extensive maternity leave allowances so there is no need to quit a job when having a baby.

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 27, 2025, 11:57:13 pm
content: Quote from: nctnico on April 27, 2025, 10:55:20 pmThis is almost entirely due to two-income families bidding up the price of a fixed supply of desirable housing.And most of the rest is people not being happy with the kind of house their grandparents lived in, and in most countries it now being illegal to build such houses.You can complain about the price food, electricity etc, but if you took out rent/mortgage (or made them 10% or 20% of what they are now) then almost no one would have problems.

author: Halcyon
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 28, 2025, 12:34:01 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 27, 2025, 11:08:23 amEh, I really don't have that desire to be honest. My sights are firmly set on the future.We'll leave our own legacy through our contributions to society, not through our kids.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 28, 2025, 01:09:42 am
content: Quote from: edavid on April 27, 2025, 08:36:18 pm$18,000 limit in California.https://hermancelaw.com/blog/california-gift-tax/#:~:text=How%20Much%20Money%20Can%20You,set%20at%20%2418%2C000%20per%20individual.Seems to be state based?

author: brucehoult
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 28, 2025, 05:04:40 am
content: Quote from: edavid on April 28, 2025, 04:51:54 amBut also "Certain types of gifts are excluded from tax calculations, including gifts to a spouse (if the spouse is a U.S. citizen)"It looks as if the first $18k of gifts per year (not to a US citizen spouse) is always tax-free, and any excess over $18k reduces the $13.99 million lifetime limits. And only after the excess over $18k per year (except to a spunse) adds up to $13.99 million do you start to pay tax.But IANAL.

author: pcprogrammer
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 28, 2025, 05:06:59 am
content: Quote from: EEVblog on April 28, 2025, 01:09:42 amStill better than in the Netherlands and France. When donating to a so called stranger (no blood relation) the exemptions are low and the tax is high.For 2025 it is in the Netherlands that one can tax free donate 2690 euro to a stranger, or 6713 euro to a child. Above that, if the recipient is a stranger they pay 30% tax. For a donation to a child it is way less, depending on the amount of money being donated.In France, I don't know about the exemption, but the tax is 60% when donating to a stranger.

author: EEVblog
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: April 28, 2025, 05:09:52 am
content: Quote from: edavid on April 28, 2025, 04:51:54 amI'd imagine that he'd have more than $14M in his lifetime to give away, maybe he's already over it.

author: u666sa
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: May 02, 2025, 08:19:47 pm
content: http://www.djbible.classicalgasemissions.com/