Ham jokes, know any? - Page 1
Forum section: electronics / rf-microwave

author: retrolefty
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 29, 2016, 11:54:46 pm
content: Lets start a collection. Here is one I heard a couple of years ago that I liked.Ham walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder."where did you get that?" asked the bartender"Dayton of course" answered the parrot.More traditional:If your antenna didn't fall down last winter then it's too small.

author: Delta
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 30, 2016, 12:41:13 am
content: I thought one of the prerequisites to qualifying for an amateur radio licence was a complete lack of any sense of humour...

author: w2aew
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: April 30, 2016, 02:06:09 am
content: True story... ...a friend that I used to go to hamfests with had a T-shirt that read:"My wife said that if I transmit one more time, she's going to leave me... ...Over"

author: GreyWoolfe
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: May 01, 2016, 04:38:05 am
content: Not necessarily a joke but when SWMBO attended her first (and only) club meeting with me, afterwards she said, 'Oh my God, there are more just like you.' Not sure what she meant by that.When I first got into ham radio, HF mobile was the only way for me to get away from the repeaters. I had 3 antennas on my car and using it for my field service tech job. I pulled up to a customer's house. He was outside and asked me, before I said anything, if I was with the CIA. With a straight face, I told him-no, I was a national weather service mobile lightning attractor. The look on his face was precious. Then I told him why I was there.

author: German_EE
author_rank: Super Contributor
timestamp: May 01, 2016, 08:38:37 am
content: The best ham joke I know is 'your signal report is 59' closely followed by a request for you to send your name and location againHowever, try these two:The sex life of an electronhttp://www.csd.uwo.ca/~magi/personal/humour/Computer_Audience/The%20Sex%20Life%20Of%20An%20Electron.htmlOr this little ditty sung to the tune of 'The Battle Hymn of the Republic'OH, MINE EYES HAVE SEEN THE GLORY OF THE TELETYPE MACHINE,IT IS PRINTING OUT THE MESSAGE TYPED UPON THE KEYS OF GREENIN A FAR DISTANT HAM SHACK WHERE I HAVE NEVER BEEN.THE TONES ARE WARBLING ON.RY RY HALLELUJAHRY RY HALLELUJAHRY RY HALLELUJAHTHE TONES ARE WARBLING ONI HAVE PRINTED ON THE LOW BANDS WHERE THE QRM ENCAMPSAND THE CROWDING OF THE SPECTRUM MY RECEPTION SORELY CRAMPSWHERE I HAVE PRINTED SOLID COPY BY THE FLICKERING NEON LAMPS.THE TONES ARE MARCHING ON.RY RY HALLELUJAHRY RY HALLELUJAHRY RY HALLELUJAHTHE TONES ARE WARBLING ONON MY WALL IS PASTED COPY FROM SEATTLE TO NEW YORKAND MY FRIENDS THEY GATHER ROUND ME AND THEY THINK I'V POPPED MY CORKWHEN I'M GAZING THRU THE SHUTTERS OF THE SPEED ADJUSTING FORK,WHILE THE TONES ARE WARBLING ON..RY RY HALLELUJAHRY RY HALLELUJAHRY RY HALLELUJAHTHE TONES ARE WARBLING ONALL HAIL THEE OH PRINTER, PAINTED GREEN, BLACK OR GRAYWITH THY BLACK SHELLED PLUG INSERTED IN A JACK MARKED "FSK"LET US SIT BEFORE THE GREEN KEYS AND WE'LL THROW OUR MIKES AWAY.WHILE THE TONES ARE MARCHING ONRY RY HALLELUJAHRY RY HALLELUJAHRY RY HALLELUJAHTHE TONES ARE WARBLING ONTONES ARE MARCHING ON

author: voltz
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: May 01, 2016, 01:55:05 pm
content: Not just for hams:"she was only the electronic engineers daughter but he couldn't resistor"..(i made that up

author: Dubbie
author_rank: Unknown
timestamp: May 05, 2016, 10:05:30 am
content: Don't quit your day job voltz.Sent from my phone using Tapatalk

author: voltz
author_rank: Frequent Contributor
timestamp: May 08, 2016, 02:24:16 pm
content: Haha, its all i got Dubbie.

author: xyrtek
author_rank: Regular Contributor
timestamp: May 11, 2016, 02:32:23 pm
content: town with 2 hams = 1 radio clubtown with 3 hams = 2 radio clubs

author: integritetus
author_rank: Newbie
timestamp: May 11, 2016, 05:04:51 pm
content: Always a favorite in the licensing classes I've taught:More of Andrew and Lissa:www.hamband.com

author: integritetus
author_rank: Newbie
timestamp: May 11, 2016, 05:45:08 pm
content: Not specifically ham radio, but close enough if you'll indulge me, is Clifford Stoll's exceptionally humorous Ted Talk. Prominently features a brilliant demonstration of the relationship between frequency and wavelength using an oscilloscope. I use the same demonstration in my technician license classes. Enjoy.https://www.ted.com/talks/clifford_stoll_on_everything?language=en

author: The_Penguin
author_rank: Regular Contributor
timestamp: June 14, 2016, 02:51:22 am
content: Quote from: xyrtek on May 11, 2016, 02:32:23 pmSo true