How should conversational agents respond to verbal abuse through the user? To answer this question, we conduct a large-scale crowd-sourced evaluation of abuse response strategies employed by current state-of-the-art systems. Our results show that some strategies, such as "polite refusal" score highly across the board, while for other strategies demographic factors, such as age, as well as the severity of the preceding abuse influence the user's perception of which response is appropriate. In addition, we find that most data-driven models lag behind rule-based or commercial systems in terms of their perceived appropriateness.