My first suggestion is get rid of the bold type Nothing in this should be bold at all my friend Bold should be for section headings Now I would again make the suggestion that the hunger strike themselves may be notable the prisoners themselves may not be I would suggest finding specific sources to draw notability from In this paticular case and Im going off the article as Im not entirely versed with the intricacies there are almost  prisoners that were or are on a hunger strike Does this make them all notable no it truly doesnt Read the section  and then look at what you have written Its a good attempt but the current wording on that article is better it covers it nuetrally and does acknowledge the concerns that many aid organizations and UN had with the situation Can you explain how these prisoners are notbale other then just this hunger strike