Concerning the prose McGillivrays many endurance events for charity are legendarypeacok term to promote physical fitness in children and help solve the epidemic of childhood obesitypuffery Epidemic Each year he runs his birthday age in miles starting when he was  and has not missed one yetnot promotional but also not encyclopedic recentism He was born on Aug    you can do the mathagain not an appropriate neutral tone motivating readers to never underestimate their own ability to set and achieve goalsPOV The book is available from Amazonpromotion serves no encyclopedic purpose A skilled motivational speaker McGillivray has displayed his signature ability to engage and inspire listeners to more than  audiences from corporate executives to high school studentsPOV and promotional and in  the prestigious Jimmy Award by the Jimmy FundPOV peacock term In addition to running one of the top race management firms in the USuncited claim top firm according to whom Need I go on   Concerning inline references Inline refs should go at the end of the sentence they support after punctuation You have formatted some of them correctly but there is also a number at them sitting at the top of the submission that dont seem to be doing anything Also in the first paragraph there is an external link acting an inline reference this should be reformatted Additionally the submission currently displays as a wall of text and should be broken into section in the format of a Wikipedia articlesee WPMOS The bull points  should be removed If you are struggling with editing in Wikimarkup check out the cheatsheet for help