torch.where behaves differently from in place replacement
Labels: needs reproduction, module: autograd, triaged, oncall: pt2

### 🐛 Describe the bug

I'm implementing an stft layer that is not trainable using 1d convolutions. One of the steps involves the normalization of a tensor. I'm finding that when I use the layer in a model, it only trains if I use in-place indexing. 

I'm trying to divide one tensor by another in torch, but only when the values of the denominator exceed a certain threshold. This implementation works.

```python
wsq_ola = wsq_ola.to(wav).expand_as(wav).clone()
min_mask = wsq_ola.abs() < eps
wav[~min_mask] = wav[~min_mask] / wsq_ola[~min_mask]
```

I tried to implement the same thing with torch.where instead as follows:

```python
wsq_ola = wsq_ola.to(wav).expand_as(wav).clone()
min_mask = wsq_ola.abs() < eps
wav = torch.where(min_mask, wav, wav / wsq_ola)
```

Unfortunately, once I make this change, the model no longer learns. Is the gradient not propagated through torch.where?


### Versions


PyTorch version: 1.13.0
Is debug build: False
CUDA used to build PyTorch: 11.7
ROCM used to build PyTorch: N/A

OS: Ubuntu 20.04.5 LTS (x86_64)
GCC version: (Ubuntu 9.4.0-1ubuntu1~20.04.1) 9.4.0
Clang version: Could not collect
CMake version: version 3.16.3
Libc version: glibc-2.31

Python version: 3.9.15 | packaged by conda-forge | (main, Nov 22 2022, 15:55:03)  [GCC 10.4.0] (64-bit runtime)
Python platform: Linux-5.15.0-60-generic-x86_64-with-glibc2.31
Is CUDA available: True
CUDA runtime version: 11.7.99
CUDA_MODULE_LOADING set to: LAZY
GPU models and configuration:
GPU 0: NVIDIA RTX A6000
GPU 1: NVIDIA RTX A6000
GPU 2: NVIDIA RTX A6000

Nvidia driver version: 470.161.03
cuDNN version: Could not collect
HIP runtime version: N/A
MIOpen runtime version: N/A
Is XNNPACK available: True

CPU:
Architecture:                    x86_64
CPU op-mode(s):                  32-bit, 64-bit
Byte Order:                      Little Endian
Address sizes:                   43 bits physical, 48 bits virtual
CPU(s):                          48
On-line CPU(s) list:             0-47
Thread(s) per core:              2
Core(s) per socket:              24
Socket(s):                       1
NUMA node(s):                    1
Vendor ID:                       AuthenticAMD
CPU family:                      23
Model:                           49
Model name:                      AMD Ryzen Threadripper 3960X 24-Core Processor
Stepping:                        0
Frequency boost:                 enabled
CPU MHz:                         2200.000
CPU max MHz:                     4568.1641
CPU min MHz:                     2200.0000
BogoMIPS:                        7600.15
Virtualization:                  AMD-V
L1d cache:                       768 KiB
L1i cache:                       768 KiB
L2 cache:                        12 MiB
L3 cache:                        128 MiB
NUMA node0 CPU(s):               0-47
Vulnerability Itlb multihit:     Not affected
Vulnerability L1tf:              Not affected
Vulnerability Mds:               Not affected
Vulnerability Meltdown:          Not affected
Vulnerability Mmio stale data:   Not affected
Vulnerability Retbleed:          Mitigation; untrained return thunk; SMT enabled with STIBP protection
Vulnerability Spec store bypass: Mitigation; Speculative Store Bypass disabled via prctl and seccomp
Vulnerability Spectre v1:        Mitigation; usercopy/swapgs barriers and __user pointer sanitization
Vulnerability Spectre v2:        Mitigation; Retpolines, IBPB conditional, STIBP always-on, RSB filling, PBRSB-eIBRS Not affected
Vulnerability Srbds:             Not affected
Vulnerability Tsx async abort:   Not affected
Flags:                           fpu vme de pse tsc msr pae mce cx8 apic sep mtrr pge mca cmov pat pse36 clflush mmx fxsr sse sse2 ht syscall nx mmxext fxsr_opt pdpe1gb rdtscp lm constant_tsc rep_good nopl nonstop_tsc cpuid extd_apicid aperfmperf rapl pni pclmulqdq monitor ssse3 fma cx16 sse4_1 sse4_2 movbe popcnt aes xsave avx f16c rdrand lahf_lm cmp_legacy svm extapic cr8_legacy abm sse4a misalignsse 3dnowprefetch osvw ibs skinit wdt tce topoext perfctr_core perfctr_nb bpext perfctr_llc mwaitx cpb cat_l3 cdp_l3 hw_pstate ssbd mba ibpb stibp vmmcall fsgsbase bmi1 avx2 smep bmi2 cqm rdt_a rdseed adx smap clflushopt clwb sha_ni xsaveopt xsavec xgetbv1 xsaves cqm_llc cqm_occup_llc cqm_mbm_total cqm_mbm_local clzero irperf xsaveerptr rdpru wbnoinvd arat npt lbrv svm_lock nrip_save tsc_scale vmcb_clean flushbyasid decodeassists pausefilter pfthreshold avic v_vmsave_vmload vgif v_spec_ctrl umip rdpid overflow_recov succor smca sme sev sev_es

Versions of relevant libraries:
[pip3] ema-pytorch==0.0.10
[pip3] mypy==0.971
[pip3] mypy-extensions==0.4.3
[pip3] numpy==1.23.5
[pip3] pytorch-lightning==1.8.0
[pip3] pytorch-ranger==0.1.1
[pip3] separate-torch==0.0.0
[pip3] torch==1.13.0
[pip3] torch-optimizer==0.3.0
[pip3] torch-summary==1.4.5
[pip3] torchaudio==0.13.0
[pip3] torchmetrics==0.10.1
[pip3] torchvision==0.14.0
[conda] blas                      1.0                         mkl    conda-forge
[conda] cudatoolkit               11.7.0              hd8887f6_10    nvidia
[conda] ema-pytorch               0.0.10                   pypi_0    pypi
[conda] libblas                   3.9.0            16_linux64_mkl    conda-forge
[conda] libcblas                  3.9.0            16_linux64_mkl    conda-forge
[conda] liblapack                 3.9.0            16_linux64_mkl    conda-forge
[conda] mkl                       2022.1.0           hc2b9512_224
[conda] numpy                     1.23.5           py39h3d75532_0    conda-forge
[conda] pytorch                   1.13.0          py3.9_cuda11.7_cudnn8.5.0_0    pytorch
[conda] pytorch-cuda              11.7                 h67b0de4_1    pytorch
[conda] pytorch-lightning         1.8.0                    pypi_0    pypi
[conda] pytorch-mutex             1.0                        cuda    pytorch
[conda] pytorch-ranger            0.1.1              pyhd8ed1ab_0    conda-forge
[conda] separate-torch            0.0.0                    pypi_0    pypi
[conda] torch-optimizer           0.3.0              pyhd8ed1ab_0    conda-forge
[conda] torch-summary             1.4.5                    pypi_0    pypi
[conda] torchaudio                0.13.0               py39_cu117    pytorch
[conda] torchmetrics              0.10.1             pyhd8ed1ab_0    conda-forge
[conda] torchvision               0.14.0               py39_cu117    pytorch

cc @ezyang @albanD @zou3519 @gqchen @pearu @nikitaved @soulitzer @Lezcano @Varal7 @soumith @msaroufim @wconstab @ngimel @bdhirsh