To Be or Not to Be…Thin: Sociological Reﬂections on the Price I Paid to Fit In (2005)

I refused to enter high school chubby. I was bound and determined to sashay through the double doors of my new school as a whole new girl. Long gone were the days of the overweight, freckly-faced, dirty blonde haired little girl. Say hello to the thin, bottle blonde, tanned hip chick. I was going to make a statement; I was going to catch some serious attention. That is exactly what I did. I decided at the conclusion of eighth grade that I was tired of being the biggest friend my group, insecure and shy, without self-confidence, I was done with being forgotten by both the boys and the popular girls. I was going to transform myself into someone else. I began to work out like a crazed maniac and eat like the bona fide bird princess. So began the journey of my fixation with perfection and the need to be seen as thin and beautiful. I spent my summer before my freshman year a literal competition with myself. I was focused on losing as much weight as I could before the first day of school. I convinced myself that the way I could get a boyfriend and be accepted by the popular girls was by being skinny and pretty. The issue was black and white. If I lost weight, I would pivot myself into popularity and desirability. All the magazines I read and all the shows I watched conveyed the same idealistic approach as what I had noticed school. I was going to make it happen, I was going to make what I saw on the and read magazines come to life. Cote and Allahar believe that teen magazines, labeled as teenzines, contribute to an indoctrination into the cult of femininity that has been taken hold of during this century, partly as a result of advertisers (Cote and Allahar 91). The advertising through magazines and create and portray a standard of beauty that young girls watch and want to mimic. Donald Davis notes: television female's existence still seems to be largely a function of her youth and beauty. Women still tend to play roles which they are more ornamental ... than functional (Cote and Allahar 92). I found this comparison, between women being ornamental rather than functional, to be particularly striking. That is how I wanted to be. I wanted to have control over what I looked like to garner attention and praise. I was wrapped up with being told I was pretty and less concerned with people really getting to know me. The idea of being accepted and attractive was more appealing than showing my insecurities. My insecurities and low self-esteem are exactly what advertising the mass media pray on. Teenagers, as a demographic, are a perfect target to lure into the money-hungry, capitalistic economy of the United States. The images of women on and magazines are overtly sexual nature, with the perfect hair, perfect body, and clothes. These images are what sell the high fashion clothes, accessories and make-up to young girls. These images, however, also sell thinness. The bombardment of rail thin models, actresses and singers creates a standard of perceived beauty that is manipulated and reproduced for adolescent teens to imagine themselves achieving. This dangerous standard set by the media through advertising, music and programming geared to teenagers who are simultaneously going through the most dramatic, influential and important years of growing up and developing creates an overwhelming amount of conflicting images and ideas. In the documentary, Merchants of Cool, the idea that companies are specifically targeting the adolescent age demographic to sell and intrigue them into buying products that emulate what they see on and what they read magazines. is a giant and booming business. Companies are using consultants to find out what teenagers want to see and buy. However, these companies are gearing their products to adolescents who want to be part of something bigger than just the product. To feel a part of a specific in crowd, teens are coaxed into buying products paraded around every media outlet for teenagers to see and read. …