diff --git "a/data/test/3608.txt" "b/data/test/3608.txt" new file mode 100644--- /dev/null +++ "b/data/test/3608.txt" @@ -0,0 +1,27434 @@ + + + + +Produced by Iain Tatch. HTML version by Al Haines. + + + + + + + + + +The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists + + +by + +Robert Tressell + + + + +CONTENTS + + 1 An Imperial Banquet. A Philosophical Discussion. The Mysterious + Stranger. Britons Never shall be Slaves + 2 Nimrod: a Mighty Hunter before the Lord + 3 The Financiers + 4 The Placard + 5 The Clock-case + 6 It is not My Crime + 7 The Exterminating Machines + 8 The Cap on the Stairs + 9 Who is to Pay? + 10 The Long Hill + 11 Hands and Brains + 12 The Letting of the Room + 13 Penal Servitude and Death + 14 Three Children. The Wages of Intelligence + 15 The Undeserving Persons and the Upper and Nether Millstones + 16 True Freedom + 17 The Rev. John Starr + 18 The Lodger + 19 The Filling of the Tank + 20 The Forty Thieves. The Battle: Brigands versus Bandits + 21 The Reign of Terror. The Great Money Trick + 22 The Phrenologist + 23 The 'Open-air' + 24 Ruth + 25 The Oblong + 26 The Slaughter + 27 The March of the Imperialists + 28 The Week before Christmas + 29 The Pandorama + 30 The Brigands hold a Council of War + 31 The Deserter + 32 The Veteran + 33 The Soldier's Children + 34 The Beginning of the End + 35 Facing the 'Problem' + 36 The OBS + 37 A Brilliant Epigram + 38 The Brigands' Cave + 39 The Brigands at Work + 40 Vive la System! + 41 The Easter Offering. The Beano Meeting + 42 June + 43 The Good Old Summer-time + 44 The Beano + 45 The Great Oration + 46 The 'Sixty-five' + 47 The Ghouls + 48 The Wise men of the East + 49 The Undesired + 50 Sundered + 51 The Widow's Son + 52 'It's a Far, Far Better Thing that I do, than I have Ever Done' + 53 Barrington Finds a Situation + 54 The End + + + + +Preface + + +In writing this book my intention was to present, in the form of an +interesting story, a faithful picture of working-class life--more +especially of those engaged in the Building trades--in a small town in +the south of England. + +I wished to describe the relations existing between the workmen and +their employers, the attitude and feelings of these two classes towards +each other; their circumstances when at work and when out of +employment; their pleasures, their intellectual outlook, their +religious and political opinions and ideals. + +The action of the story covers a period of only a little over twelve +months, but in order that the picture might be complete it was +necessary to describe how the workers are circumstanced at all periods +of their lives, from the cradle to the grave. Therefore the characters +include women and children, a young boy--the apprentice--some +improvers, journeymen in the prime of life, and worn-out old men. + +I designed to show the conditions relating from poverty and +unemployment: to expose the futility of the measures taken to deal with +them and to indicate what I believe to be the only real remedy, +namely--Socialism. I intended to explain what Socialists understand by +the word 'poverty': to define the Socialist theory of the causes of +poverty, and to explain how Socialists propose to abolish poverty. + +It may be objected that, considering the number of books dealing with +these subjects already existing, such a work as this was uncalled for. +The answer is that not only are the majority of people opposed to +Socialism, but a very brief conversation with an average anti-socialist +is sufficient to show that he does not know what Socialism means. The +same is true of all the anti-socialist writers and the 'great +statesmen' who make anti-socialist speeches: unless we believe that +they are deliberate liars and imposters, who to serve their own +interests labour to mislead other people, we must conclude that they do +not understand Socialism. There is no other possible explanation of +the extraordinary things they write and say. The thing they cry out +against is not Socialism but a phantom of their own imagining. + +Another answer is that 'The Philanthropists' is not a treatise or +essay, but a novel. My main object was to write a readable story full +of human interest and based on the happenings of everyday life, the +subject of Socialism being treated incidentally. + +This was the task I set myself. To what extent I have succeeded is for +others to say; but whatever their verdict, the work possesses at least +one merit--that of being true. I have invented nothing. There are no +scenes or incidents in the story that I have not either witnessed +myself or had conclusive evidence of. As far as I dared I let the +characters express themselves in their own sort of language and +consequently some passages may be considered objectionable. At the +same time I believe that--because it is true--the book is not without +its humorous side. + +The scenes and characters are typical of every town in the South of +England and they will be readily recognized by those concerned. If the +book is published I think it will appeal to a very large number of +readers. Because it is true it will probably be denounced as a libel +on the working classes and their employers, and upon the +religious-professing section of the community. But I believe it will be +acknowledged as true by most of those who are compelled to spend their +lives amid the surroundings it describes, and it will be evident that +no attack is made upon sincere religion. + + + +Chapter 1 + +An Imperial Banquet. A Philosophical Discussion. The Mysterious +Stranger. Britons Never shall be Slaves + + +The house was named 'The Cave'. It was a large old-fashioned +three-storied building standing in about an acre of ground, and +situated about a mile outside the town of Mugsborough. It stood back +nearly two hundred yards from the main road and was reached by means of +a by-road or lane, on each side of which was a hedge formed of hawthorn +trees and blackberry bushes. This house had been unoccupied for many +years and it was now being altered and renovated for its new owner by +the firm of Rushton & Co., Builders and Decorators. + +There were, altogether, about twenty-five men working there, +carpenters, plumbers, plasterers, bricklayers and painters, besides +several unskilled labourers. New floors were being put in where the +old ones were decayed, and upstairs two of the rooms were being made +into one by demolishing the parting wall and substituting an iron +girder. Some of the window frames and sashes were so rotten that they +were being replaced. Some of the ceilings and walls were so cracked and +broken that they had to be replastered. Openings were cut through +walls and doors were being put where no doors had been before. Old +broken chimney pots were being taken down and new ones were being taken +up and fixed in their places. All the old whitewash had to be washed +off the ceilings and all the old paper had to be scraped off the walls +preparatory to the house being repainted and decorated. The air was +full of the sounds of hammering and sawing, the ringing of trowels, the +rattle of pails, the splashing of water brushes, and the scraping of +the stripping knives used by those who were removing the old wallpaper. +Besides being full of these the air was heavily laden with dust and +disease germs, powdered mortar, lime, plaster, and the dirt that had +been accumulating within the old house for years. In brief, those +employed there might be said to be living in a Tariff Reform +Paradise--they had Plenty of Work. + +At twelve o'clock Bob Crass--the painters' foreman--blew a blast upon a +whistle and all hands assembled in the kitchen, where Bert the +apprentice had already prepared the tea, which was ready in the large +galvanized iron pail that he had placed in the middle of the floor. By +the side of the pail were a number of old jam-jars, mugs, dilapidated +tea-cups and one or two empty condensed milk tins. Each man on the +'job' paid Bert threepence a week for the tea and sugar--they did not +have milk--and although they had tea at breakfast-time as well as at +dinner, the lad was generally considered to be making a fortune. + +Two pairs of steps, laid parallel on their sides at a distance of about +eight feet from each other, with a plank laid across, in front of the +fire, several upturned pails, and the drawers belonging to the dresser, +formed the seating accommodation. The floor of the room was covered +with all manner of debris, dust, dirt, fragments of old mortar and +plaster. A sack containing cement was leaning against one of the +walls, and a bucket containing some stale whitewash stood in one corner. + +As each man came in he filled his cup, jam-jar or condensed milk tin +with tea from the steaming pail, before sitting down. Most of them +brought their food in little wicker baskets which they held on their +laps or placed on the floor beside them. + +At first there was no attempt at conversation and nothing was heard but +the sounds of eating and drinking and the drizzling of the bloater +which Easton, one of the painters, was toasting on the end of a pointed +stick at the fire. + +'I don't think much of this bloody tea,' suddenly remarked Sawkins, one +of the labourers. + +'Well it oughter be all right,' retorted Bert; 'it's been bilin' ever +since 'arf past eleven.' + +Bert White was a frail-looking, weedy, pale-faced boy, fifteen years of +age and about four feet nine inches in height. His trousers were part +of a suit that he had once worn for best, but that was so long ago that +they had become too small for him, fitting rather tightly and scarcely +reaching the top of his patched and broken hob-nailed boots. The knees +and the bottoms of the legs of his trousers had been patched with +square pieces of cloth, several shades darker than the original fabric, +and these patches were now all in rags. His coat was several sizes too +large for him and hung about him like a dirty ragged sack. He was a +pitiable spectacle of neglect and wretchedness as he sat there on an +upturned pail, eating his bread and cheese with fingers that, like his +clothing, were grimed with paint and dirt. + +'Well then, you can't have put enough tea in, or else you've bin usin' +up wot was left yesterday,' continued Sawkins. + +'Why the bloody 'ell don't you leave the boy alone?' said Harlow, +another painter. 'If you don't like the tea you needn't drink it. For +my part, I'm sick of listening to you about it every damn day.' + +'It's all very well for you to say I needn't drink it,' answered +Sawkins, 'but I've paid my share an' I've got a right to express an +opinion. It's my belief that 'arf the money we gives 'him is spent on +penny 'orribles: 'e's always got one in 'is hand, an' to make wot tea +'e does buy last, 'e collects all the slops wot's left and biles it up +day after day.' + +'No, I don't!' said Bert, who was on the verge of tears. 'It's not me +wot buys the things at all. I gives the money I gets to Crass, and 'e +buys them 'imself, so there!' + +At this revelation, some of the men furtively exchanged significant +glances, and Crass, the foreman, became very red. + +'You'd better keep your bloody thruppence and make your own tea after +this week,' he said, addressing Sawkins, 'and then p'raps we'll 'ave a +little peace at meal-times.' + +'An' you needn't ask me to cook no bloaters or bacon for you no more,' +added Bert, tearfully, 'cos I won't do it.' + +Sawkins was not popular with any of the others. When, about twelve +months previously, he first came to work for Rushton & Co., he was a +simple labourer, but since then he had 'picked up' a slight knowledge +of the trade, and having armed himself with a putty-knife and put on a +white jacket, regarded himself as a fully qualified painter. The +others did not perhaps object to him trying to better his condition, +but his wages--fivepence an hour--were twopence an hour less than the +standard rate, and the result was that in slack times often a better +workman was 'stood off' when Sawkins was kept on. Moreover, he was +generally regarded as a sneak who carried tales to the foreman and the +'Bloke'. Every new hand who was taken on was usually warned by his new +mates 'not to let the b--r Sawkins see anything.' + +The unpleasant silence which now ensued was at length broken by one of +the men, who told a dirty story, and in the laughter and applause that +followed, the incident of the tea was forgotten. + +'How did you get on yesterday?' asked Crass, addressing Bundy, the +plasterer, who was intently studying the sporting columns of the Daily +Obscurer. + +'No luck,' replied Bundy, gloomily. 'I had a bob each way on Stockwell, +in the first race, but it was scratched before the start.' + +This gave rise to a conversation between Crass, Bundy, and one or two +others concerning the chances of different horses in the morrow's +races. It was Friday, and no one had much money, so at the suggestion +of Bundy, a Syndicate was formed, each member contributing threepence +for the purpose of backing a dead certainty given by the renowned +Captain Kiddem of the Obscurer. One of those who did not join the +syndicate was Frank Owen, who was as usual absorbed in a newspaper. He +was generally regarded as a bit of a crank: for it was felt that there +must be something wrong about a man who took no interest in racing or +football and was always talking a lot of rot about religion and +politics. If it had not been for the fact that he was generally +admitted to be an exceptionally good workman, they would have had +little hesitation about thinking that he was mad. This man was about +thirty-two years of age, and of medium height, but so slightly built +that he appeared taller. There was a suggestion of refinement in his +clean-shaven face, but his complexion was ominously clear, and an +unnatural colour flushed the think cheeks. + +There was a certain amount of justification for the attitude of his +fellow workmen, for Owen held the most unusual and unorthodox opinions +on the subjects mentioned. + +The affairs of the world are ordered in accordance with orthodox +opinions. If anyone did not think in accordance with these he soon +discovered this fact for himself. Owen saw that in the world a small +class of people were possessed of a great abundance and superfluity of +the things that are produced by work. He saw also that a very great +number--in fact the majority of the people--lived on the verge of want; +and that a smaller but still very large number lived lives of +semi-starvation from the cradle to the grave; while a yet smaller but +still very great number actually died of hunger, or, maddened by +privation, killed themselves and their children in order to put a +period to their misery. And strangest of all--in his opinion--he saw +that people who enjoyed abundance of the things that are made by work, +were the people who did Nothing: and that the others, who lived in want +or died of hunger, were the people who worked. And seeing all this he +thought that it was wrong, that the system that produced such results +was rotten and should be altered. And he had sought out and eagerly +read the writings of those who thought they knew how it might be done. + +It was because he was in the habit of speaking of these subjects that +his fellow workmen came to the conclusion that there was probably +something wrong with his mind. + +When all the members of the syndicate had handed over their +contributions, Bundy went out to arrange matters with the bookie, and +when he had gone Easton annexed the copy of the Obscurer that Bundy had +thrown away, and proceeded to laboriously work through some carefully +cooked statistics relating to Free Trade and Protection. Bert, his eyes +starting out of his head and his mouth wide open, was devouring the +contents of a paper called The Chronicles of Crime. Ned Dawson, a poor +devil who was paid fourpence an hour for acting as mate or labourer to +Bundy, or the bricklayers, or anyone else who wanted him, lay down on +the dirty floor in a corner of the room and with his coat rolled up as +a pillow, went to sleep. Sawkins, with the same intention, stretched +himself at full length on the dresser. Another who took no part in the +syndicate was Barrington, a labourer, who, having finished his dinner, +placed the cup he brought for his tea back into his dinner basket, took +out an old briar pipe which he slowly filled, and proceeded to smoke in +silence. + +Some time previously the firm had done some work for a wealthy +gentleman who lived in the country, some distance outside Mugsborough. +This gentleman also owned some property in the town and it was commonly +reported that he had used his influence with Rushton to induce the +latter to give Barrington employment. It was whispered amongst the +hands that the young man was a distant relative of the gentleman's, and +that he had disgraced himself in some way and been disowned by his +people. Rushton was supposed to have given him a job in the hope of +currying favour with his wealthy client, from whom he hoped to obtain +more work. Whatever the explanation of the mystery may have been, the +fact remained that Barrington, who knew nothing of the work except what +he had learned since he had been taken on, was employed as a painter's +labourer at the usual wages--fivepence per hour. + +He was about twenty-five years of age and a good deal taller than the +majority of the others, being about five feet ten inches in height and +slenderly though well and strongly built. He seemed very anxious to +learn all that he could about the trade, and although rather reserved +in his manner, he had contrived to make himself fairly popular with his +workmates. He seldom spoke unless to answer when addressed, and it was +difficult to draw him into conversation. At meal-times, as on the +present occasion, he generally smoked, apparently lost in thought and +unconscious of his surroundings. + +Most of the others also lit their pipes and a desultory conversation +ensued. + +'Is the gent what's bought this 'ouse any relation to Sweater the +draper?' asked Payne, the carpenter's foreman. + +'It's the same bloke,' replied Crass. + +'Didn't he used to be on the Town Council or something?' + +''E's bin on the Council for years,' returned Crass. ''E's on it now. +'E's mayor this year. 'E's bin mayor several times before.' + +'Let's see,' said Payne, reflectively, ''e married old Grinder's +sister, didn't 'e? You know who I mean, Grinder the greengrocer.' + +'Yes, I believe he did,' said Crass. + +'It wasn't Grinder's sister,' chimed in old Jack Linden. 'It was 'is +niece. I know, because I remember working in their 'ouse just after +they was married, about ten year ago.' + +'Oh yes, I remember now,' said Payne. 'She used to manage one of +Grinder's branch shops didn't she?' + +'Yes,' replied Linden. 'I remember it very well because there was a +lot of talk about it at the time. By all accounts, ole Sweater used to +be a regler 'ot un: no one never thought as he'd ever git married at +all: there was some funny yarns about several young women what used to +work for him.' + +This important matter being disposed of, there followed a brief +silence, which was presently broken by Harlow. + +'Funny name to call a 'ouse, ain't it?' he said. '"The Cave." I +wonder what made 'em give it a name like that.' + +'They calls 'em all sorts of outlandish names nowadays,' said old Jack +Linden. + +'There's generally some sort of meaning to it, though,' observed Payne. +'For instance, if a bloke backed a winner and made a pile, 'e might +call 'is 'ouse, "Epsom Lodge" or "Newmarket Villa".' + +'Or sometimes there's a hoak tree or a cherry tree in the garding,' +said another man; 'then they calls it "Hoak Lodge" or "Cherry Cottage".' + +'Well, there's a cave up at the end of this garden,' said Harlow with a +grin, 'you know, the cesspool, what the drains of the 'ouse runs into; +praps they called it after that.' + +'Talking about the drains,' said old Jack Linden when the laughter +produced by this elegant joke had ceased. 'Talking about the drains, I +wonder what they're going to do about them; the 'ouse ain't fit to live +in as they are now, and as for that bloody cesspool it ought to be done +away with.' + +'So it is going to be,' replied Crass. 'There's going to be a new set +of drains altogether, carried right out to the road and connected with +the main.' + +Crass really knew no more about what was going to be done in this +matter than did Linden, but he felt certain that this course would be +adopted. He never missed an opportunity of enhancing his own prestige +with the men by insinuating that he was in the confidence of the firm. + +'That's goin' to cost a good bit,' said Linden. + +'Yes, I suppose it will,' replied Crass, 'but money ain't no object to +old Sweater. 'E's got tons of it; you know 'e's got a large wholesale +business in London and shops all over the bloody country, besides the +one 'e's got 'ere.' + +Easton was still reading the Obscurer; he was not about to understand +exactly what the compiler of the figures was driving at--probably the +latter never intended that anyone should understand--but he was +conscious of a growing feeling of indignation and hatred against +foreigners of every description, who were ruining this country, and he +began to think that it was about time we did something to protect +ourselves. Still, it was a very difficult question: to tell the truth, +he himself could not make head or tail of it. At length he said aloud, +addressing himself to Crass: + +'Wot do you think of this 'ere fissical policy, Bob?' + +'Ain't thought much about it,' replied Crass. 'I don't never worry my +'ed about politics.' + +'Much better left alone,' chimed in old Jack Linden sagely, 'argyfying +about politics generally ends up with a bloody row an' does no good to +nobody.' + +At this there was a murmur of approval from several of the others. Most +of them were averse from arguing or disputing about politics. If two +or three men of similar opinions happened to be together they might +discuss such things in a friendly and superficial way, but in a mixed +company it was better left alone. The 'Fissical Policy' emanated from +the Tory party. That was the reason why some of them were strongly in +favour of it, and for the same reason others were opposed to it. Some +of them were under the delusion that they were Conservatives: +similarly, others imagined themselves to be Liberals. As a matter of +fact, most of them were nothing. They knew as much about the public +affairs of their own country as they did of the condition of affairs in +the planet of Jupiter. + +Easton began to regret that he had broached so objectionable a subject, +when, looking up from his paper, Owen said: + +'Does the fact that you never "trouble your heads about politics" +prevent you from voting at election times?' + +No one answered, and there ensued a brief silence. Easton however, in +spite of the snub he had received, could not refrain from talking. + +'Well, I don't go in for politics much, either, but if what's in this +'ere paper is true, it seems to me as we oughter take some interest in +it, when the country is being ruined by foreigners.' + +'If you're going to believe all that's in that bloody rag you'll want +some salt,' said Harlow. + +The Obscurer was a Tory paper and Harlow was a member of the local +Liberal club. Harlow's remark roused Crass. + +'Wot's the use of talkin' like that?' he said; 'you know very well that +the country IS being ruined by foreigners. Just go to a shop to buy +something; look round the place an' you'll see that more than 'arf the +damn stuff comes from abroad. They're able to sell their goods 'ere +because they don't 'ave to pay no dooty, but they takes care to put +'eavy dooties on our goods to keep 'em out of their countries; and I +say it's about time it was stopped.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' said Linden, who always agreed with Crass, because the +latter, being in charge of the job, had it in his power to put in a +good--or a bad--word for a man to the boss. ''Ear, 'ear! Now that's +wot I call common sense.' + +Several other men, for the same reason as Linden, echoed Crass's +sentiments, but Owen laughed contemptuously. + +'Yes, it's quite true that we gets a lot of stuff from foreign +countries,' said Harlow, 'but they buys more from us than we do from +them.' + +'Now you think you know a 'ell of a lot,' said Crass. ''Ow much more +did they buy from us last year, than we did from them?' + +Harlow looked foolish: as a matter of fact his knowledge of the subject +was not much wider than Crass's. He mumbled something about not having +no 'ed for figures, and offered to bring full particulars next day. + +'You're wot I call a bloody windbag,' continued Crass; 'you've got a +'ell of a lot to say, but wen it comes to the point you don't know +nothin'.' + +'Why, even 'ere in Mugsborough,' chimed in Sawkins--who though still +lying on the dresser had been awakened by the shouting--'We're overrun +with 'em! Nearly all the waiters and the cook at the Grand Hotel where +we was working last month is foreigners.' + +'Yes,' said old Joe Philpot, tragically, 'and then thers all them +Hitalian horgin grinders, an' the blokes wot sells 'ot chestnuts; an' +wen I was goin' 'ome last night I see a lot of them Frenchies sellin' +hunions, an' a little wile afterwards I met two more of 'em comin' up +the street with a bear.' + +Notwithstanding the disquieting nature of this intelligence, Owen again +laughed, much to the indignation of the others, who thought it was a +very serious state of affairs. It was a dam' shame that these people +were allowed to take the bread out of English people's mouths: they +ought to be driven into the bloody sea. + +And so the talk continued, principally carried on by Crass and those +who agreed with him. None of them really understood the subject: not +one of them had ever devoted fifteen consecutive minutes to the earnest +investigation of it. The papers they read were filled with vague and +alarming accounts of the quantities of foreign merchandise imported +into this country, the enormous number of aliens constantly arriving, +and their destitute conditions, how they lived, the crimes they +committed, and the injury they did to British trade. These were the +seeds which, cunningly sown in their minds, caused to grow up within +them a bitter undiscriminating hatred of foreigners. To them the +mysterious thing they variously called the 'Friscal Policy', the +'Fistical Policy', or the 'Fissical Question' was a great Anti-Foreign +Crusade. The country was in a hell of a state, poverty, hunger and +misery in a hundred forms had already invaded thousands of homes and +stood upon the thresholds of thousands more. How came these things to +be? It was the bloody foreigner! Therefore, down with the foreigners +and all their works. Out with them. Drive them b--s into the bloody +sea! The country would be ruined if not protected in some way. This +Friscal, Fistical, Fissical or whatever the hell policy it was called, +WAS Protection, therefore no one but a bloody fool could hesitate to +support it. It was all quite plain--quite simple. One did not need to +think twice about it. It was scarcely necessary to think about it at +all. + +This was the conclusion reached by Crass and such of his mates who +thought they were Conservatives--the majority of them could not have +read a dozen sentences aloud without stumbling--it was not necessary to +think or study or investigate anything. It was all as clear as +daylight. The foreigner was the enemy, and the cause of poverty and +bad trade. + +When the storm had in some degree subsided, + +'Some of you seem to think,' said Owen, sneeringly, 'that it was a +great mistake on God's part to make so many foreigners. You ought to +hold a mass meeting about it: pass a resolution something like this: +"This meeting of British Christians hereby indignantly protests against +the action of the Supreme Being in having created so many foreigners, +and calls upon him to forthwith rain down fire, brimstone and mighty +rocks upon the heads of all those Philistines, so that they may be +utterly exterminated from the face of the earth, which rightly belongs +to the British people".' + +Crass looked very indignant, but could think of nothing to say in +answer to Owen, who continued: + +'A little while ago you made the remark that you never trouble yourself +about what you call politics, and some of the rest agreed with you that +to do so is not worth while. Well, since you never "worry" yourself +about these things, it follows that you know nothing about them; yet +you do not hesitate to express the most decided opinions concerning +matters of which you admittedly know nothing. Presently, when there is +an election, you will go and vote in favour of a policy of which you +know nothing. I say that since you never take the trouble to find out +which side is right or wrong you have no right to express any opinion. +You are not fit to vote. You should not be allowed to vote.' + +Crass was by this time very angry. + +'I pays my rates and taxes,' he shouted, 'an' I've got as much right to +express an opinion as you 'ave. I votes for who the bloody 'ell I +likes. I shan't arst your leave nor nobody else's! Wot the 'ell's it +got do with you who I votes for?' + +'It has a great deal to do with me. If you vote for Protection you +will be helping to bring it about, and if you succeed, and if +Protection is the evil that some people say is is, I shall be one of +those who will suffer. I say you have no right to vote for a policy +which may bring suffering upon other people, without taking the trouble +to find out whether you are helping to make things better or worse.' + +Owen had risen from his seat and was walking up and down the room +emphasizing his words with excited gestures. + +'As for not trying to find out wot side is right,' said Crass, somewhat +overawed by Owen's manner and by what he thought was the glare of +madness in the latter's eyes, 'I reads the Ananias every week, and I +generally takes the Daily Chloroform, or the Hobscurer, so I ought to +know summat about it.' + +'Just listen to this,' interrupted Easton, wishing to create a +diversion and beginning to read from the copy of the Obscurer which he +still held in his hand: + + 'GREAT DISTRESS IN MUGSBOROUGH. + HUNDREDS OUT OF EMPLOYMENT. + WORK OF THE CHARITY SOCIETY. + 789 CASES ON THE BOOKS. + + 'Great as was the distress among the working classes last year, + unfortunately there seems every prospect that before the winter + which has just commenced is over the distress will be even more + acute. + + Already the Charity Society and kindred associations are relieving + more cases than they did at the corresponding time last year. + Applications to the Board of Guardians have also been much more + numerous, and the Soup Kitchen has had to open its doors on Nov. 7th + a fortnight earlier than usual. The number of men, women and + children provided with meals is three or four times greater than + last year.' + +Easton stopped: reading was hard work to him. + +'There's a lot more,' he said, 'about starting relief works: two +shillings a day for married men and one shilling for single and +something about there's been 1,572 quarts of soup given to poor +families wot was not even able to pay a penny, and a lot more. And +'ere's another thing, an advertisement: + + 'THE SUFFERING POOR + + Sir: Distress among the poor is so acute that I earnestly ask you + for aid for The Salvation Army's great Social work on their behalf. + Some 600 are being sheltered nightly. Hundreds are found work + daily. Soup and bread are distributed in the midnight hours to + homeless wanderers in London. Additional workshops for the + unemployed have been established. Our Social Work for men, women + and children, for the characterless and the outcast, is the largest + and oldest organized effort of its kind in the country, and greatly + needs help. L10,000 is required before Christmas Day. Gifts may be + made to any specific section or home, if desired. Can you please + send us something to keep the work going? Please address cheques, + crossed Bank of England (Law Courts Branch), to me at 101, Queen + Victoria Street, EC. Balance Sheets and Reports upon application. + 'BRAMWELL BOOTH.' + +'Oh, that's part of the great 'appiness an' prosperity wot Owen makes +out Free Trade brings,' said Crass with a jeering laugh. + +'I never said Free Trade brought happiness or prosperity,' said Owen. + +'Well, praps you didn't say exactly them words, but that's wot it +amounts to.' + +'I never said anything of the kind. We've had Free Trade for the last +fifty years and today most people are living in a condition of more or +less abject poverty, and thousands are literally starving. When we had +Protection things were worse still. Other countries have Protection +and yet many of their people are glad to come here and work for +starvation wages. The only difference between Free Trade and +Protection is that under certain circumstances one might be a little +worse that the other, but as remedies for Poverty, neither of them are +of any real use whatever, for the simple reason that they do not deal +with the real causes of Poverty.' + +'The greatest cause of poverty is hover-population,' remarked Harlow. + +'Yes,' said old Joe Philpot. 'If a boss wants two men, twenty goes +after the job: ther's too many people and not enough work.' + +'Over-population!' cried Owen, 'when there's thousands of acres of +uncultivated land in England without a house or human being to be seen. +Is over-population the cause of poverty in France? Is over-population +the cause of poverty in Ireland? Within the last fifty years the +population of Ireland has been reduced by more than half. Four +millions of people have been exterminated by famine or got rid of by +emigration, but they haven't got rid of poverty. P'raps you think that +half the people in this country ought to be exterminated as well.' + +Here Owen was seized with a violent fit of coughing, and resumed his +seat. When the cough had ceased he sat wiping his mouth with his +handkerchief and listening to the talk that ensued. + +'Drink is the cause of most of the poverty,' said Slyme. + +This young man had been through some strange process that he called +'conversion'. He had had a 'change of 'art' and looked down with pious +pity upon those he called 'worldly' people. He was not 'worldly', he +did not smoke or drink and never went to the theatre. He had an +extraordinary notion that total abstinence was one of the fundamental +principles of the Christian religion. It never occurred to what he +called his mind, that this doctrine is an insult to the Founder of +Christianity. + +'Yes,' said Crass, agreeing with Slyme, 'an' thers plenty of 'em wot's +too lazy to work when they can get it. Some of the b--s who go about +pleading poverty 'ave never done a fair day's work in all their bloody +lives. Then thers all this new-fangled machinery,' continued Crass. +'That's wot's ruinin' everything. Even in our trade ther's them +machines for trimmin' wallpaper, an' now they've brought out a paintin' +machine. Ther's a pump an' a 'ose pipe, an' they reckon two men can do +as much with this 'ere machine as twenty could without it.' + +'Another thing is women,' said Harlow, 'there's thousands of 'em +nowadays doin' work wot oughter be done by men.' + +'In my opinion ther's too much of this 'ere eddication, nowadays,' +remarked old Linden. 'Wot the 'ell's the good of eddication to the +likes of us?' + +'None whatever,' said Crass, 'it just puts foolish idears into people's +'eds and makes 'em too lazy to work.' + +Barrington, who took no part in the conversation, still sat silently +smoking. Owen was listening to this pitiable farrago with feelings of +contempt and wonder. Were they all hopelessly stupid? Had their +intelligence never developed beyond the childhood stage? Or was he mad +himself? + +'Early marriages is another thing,' said Slyme: 'no man oughtn't to be +allowed to get married unless he's in a position to keep a family.' + +'How can marriage be a cause of poverty?' said Owen, contemptuously. 'A +man who is not married is living an unnatural life. Why don't you +continue your argument a little further and say that the practice of +eating and drinking is the cause of poverty or that if people were to +go barefoot and naked there would be no poverty? The man who is so +poor that he cannot marry is in a condition of poverty already.' + +'Wot I mean,' said Slyme, 'is that no man oughtn't to marry till he's +saved up enough so as to 'ave some money in the bank; an' another +thing, I reckon a man oughtn't to get married till 'e's got an 'ouse of +'is own. It's easy enough to buy one in a building society if you're +in reg'lar work.' + +At this there was a general laugh. + +'Why, you bloody fool,' said Harlow, scornfully, 'most of us is walkin' +about 'arf our time. It's all very well for you to talk; you've got +almost a constant job on this firm. If they're doin' anything at all +you're one of the few gets a show in. And another thing,' he added +with a sneer, 'we don't all go to the same chapel as old Misery,' + +'Old Misery' was Ruston & Co.'s manager or walking foreman. 'Misery' +was only one of the nicknames bestowed upon him by the hands: he was +also known as 'Nimrod' and 'Pontius Pilate'. + +'And even if it's not possible,' Harlow continued, winking at the +others, 'what's a man to do during the years he's savin' up?' + +'Well, he must conquer hisself,' said Slyme, getting red. + +'Conquer hisself is right!' said Harlow and the others laughed again. + +'Of course if a man tried to conquer hisself by his own strength,' +replied Slyme, ''e would be sure to fail, but when you've got the Grace +of God in you it's different.' + +'Chuck it, fer Christ's sake!' said Harlow in a tone of disgust. 'We've +only just 'ad our dinner!' + +'And wot about drink?' demanded old Joe Philpot, suddenly. + +''Ear, 'ear,' cried Harlow. 'That's the bleedin' talk. I wouldn't +mind 'avin 'arf a pint now, if somebody else will pay for it.' + +Joe Philpot--or as he was usually called, 'Old Joe'--was in the habit +of indulging freely in the cup that inebriates. He was not very old, +being only a little over fifty, but he looked much older. He had lost +his wife some five years ago and was now alone in the world, for his +three children had died in their infancy. Slyme's reference to drink +had roused Philpot's indignation; he felt that it was directed against +himself. The muddled condition of his brain did not permit him to take +up the cudgels in his own behalf, but he knew that although Owen was a +tee-totaller himself, he disliked Slyme. + +'There's no need for us to talk about drink or laziness,' returned +Owen, impatiently, 'because they have nothing to do with the matter. +The question is, what is the cause of the lifelong poverty of the +majority of those who are not drunkards and who DO work? Why, if all +the drunkards and won't-works and unskilled or inefficient workers +could be by some miracle transformed into sober, industrious and +skilled workers tomorrow, it would, under the present conditions, be so +much the worse for us, because there isn't enough work for all NOW and +those people by increasing the competition for what work there is, +would inevitably cause a reduction of wages and a greater scarcity of +employment. The theories that drunkenness, laziness or inefficiency +are the causes of poverty are so many devices invented and fostered by +those who are selfishly interested in maintaining the present states of +affairs, for the purpose of preventing us from discovering the real +causes of our present condition.' + +'Well, if we're all wrong,' said Crass, with a sneer, 'praps you can +tell us what the real cause is?' + +'An' praps you think you know how it's to be altered,' remarked Harlow, +winking at the others. + +'Yes; I do think I know the cause,' declared Owen, 'and I do think I +know how it could be altered--' + +'It can't never be haltered,' interrupted old Linden. 'I don't see no +sense in all this 'ere talk. There's always been rich and poor in the +world, and there always will be.' + +'Wot I always say is there 'ere,' remarked Philpot, whose principal +characteristic--apart from thirst--was a desire to see everyone +comfortable, and who hated rows of any kind. 'There ain't no use in +the likes of us trubblin our 'eds or quarrelin about politics. It +don't make a dam bit of difference who you votes for or who gets in. +They're hall the same; workin the horicle for their own benefit. You +can talk till you're black in the face, but you won't never be able to +alter it. It's no use worrying. The sensible thing is to try and make +the best of things as we find 'em: enjoy ourselves, and do the best we +can for each other. Life's too short to quarrel and we'll hall soon be +dead!' + +At the end of this lengthy speech, the philosophic Philpot abstractedly +grasped a jam-jar and raised it to his lips; but suddenly remembering +that it contained stewed tea and not beer, set it down again without +drinking. + +'Let us begin at the beginning,' continued Owen, taking no notice of +these interruptions. 'First of all, what do you mean by Poverty?' + +'Why, if you've got no money, of course,' said Crass impatiently. + +The others laughed disdainfully. It seemed to them such a foolish +question. + +'Well, that's true enough as far as it goes,' returned Owen, 'that is, +as things are arranged in the world at present. But money itself is +not wealth: it's of no use whatever.' + +At this there was another outburst of jeering laughter. + +'Supposing for example that you and Harlow were shipwrecked on a +desolate island, and YOU had saved nothing from the wreck but a bag +containing a thousand sovereigns, and he had a tin of biscuits and a +bottle of water.' + +'Make it beer!' cried Harlow appealingly. + +'Who would be the richer man, you or Harlow?' + +'But then you see we ain't shipwrecked on no dissolute island at all,' +sneered Crass. 'That's the worst of your arguments. You can't never +get very far without supposing some bloody ridclus thing or other. +Never mind about supposing things wot ain't true; let's 'ave facts and +common sense.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' said old Linden. 'That's wot we want--a little common +sense.' + +'What do YOU mean by poverty, then?' asked Easton. + +'What I call poverty is when people are not able to secure for +themselves all the benefits of civilization; the necessaries, comforts, +pleasures and refinements of life, leisure, books, theatres, pictures, +music, holidays, travel, good and beautiful homes, good clothes, good +and pleasant food.' + +Everybody laughed. It was so ridiculous. The idea of the likes of +THEM wanting or having such things! Any doubts that any of them had +entertained as to Owen's sanity disappeared. The man was as mad as a +March hare. + +'If a man is only able to provide himself and his family with the bare +necessaries of existence, that man's family is living in poverty. Since +he cannot enjoy the advantages of civilization he might just as well be +a savage: better, in fact, for a savage knows nothing of what he is +deprived. What we call civilization--the accumulation of knowledge +which has come down to us from our forefathers--is the fruit of +thousands of years of human thought and toil. It is not the result of +the labour of the ancestors of any separate class of people who exist +today, and therefore it is by right the common heritage of all. Every +little child that is born into the world, no matter whether he is +clever or full, whether he is physically perfect or lame, or blind; no +matter how much he may excel or fall short of his fellows in other +respects, in one thing at least he is their equal--he is one of the +heirs of all the ages that have gone before.' + +Some of them began to wonder whether Owen was not sane after all. He +certainly must be a clever sort of chap to be able to talk like this. +It sounded almost like something out of a book, and most of them could +not understand one half of it. + +'Why is it,' continued Owen, 'that we are not only deprived of our +inheritance--we are not only deprived of nearly all the benefits of +civilization, but we and our children are also often unable to obtain +even the bare necessaries of existence?' + +No one answered. + +'All these things,' Owen proceeded, 'are produced by those who work. We +do our full share of the work, therefore we should have a full share of +the things that are made by work.' + +The others continued silent. Harlow thought of the over-population +theory, but decided not to mention it. Crass, who could not have given +an intelligent answer to save his life, for once had sufficient sense +to remain silent. He did think of calling out the patent paint-pumping +machine and bringing the hosepipe to bear on the subject, but abandoned +the idea; after all, he thought, what was the use of arguing with such +a fool as Owen? + +Sawkins pretended to be asleep. + +Philpot, however, had suddenly grown very serious. + +'As things are now,' went on Owen, 'instead of enjoying the advantages +of civilization we are really worse off than slaves, for if we were +slaves our owners in their own interest would see to it that we always +had food and--' + +'Oh, I don't see that,' roughly interrupted old Linden, who had been +listening with evident anger and impatience. 'You can speak for +yourself, but I can tell yer I don't put MYSELF down as a slave.' + +'Nor me neither,' said Crass sturdily. 'Let them call their selves +slaves as wants to.' + +At this moment a footstep was heard in the passage leading to the +kitchen. Old Misery! or perhaps the bloke himself! Crass hurriedly +pulled out his watch. + +'Jesus Christ!' he gasped. 'It's four minutes past one!' + +Linden frantically seized hold of a pair of steps and began wandering +about the room with them. + +Sawkins scrambled hastily to his feet and, snatching a piece of +sandpaper from the pocket of his apron, began furiously rubbing down +the scullery door. + +Easton threw down the copy of the Obscurer and scrambled hastily to his +feet. + +The boy crammed the Chronicles of Crime into his trousers pocket. + +Crass rushed over to the bucket and began stirring up the stale +whitewash it contained, and the stench which it gave forth was simply +appalling. + +Consternation reigned. + +They looked like a gang of malefactors suddenly interrupted in the +commission of a crime. + +The door opened. It was only Bundy returning from his mission to the +Bookie. + + + +Chapter 2 + +Nimrod: a Mighty Hunter before the Lord + + +Mr Hunter, as he was called to his face and as he was known to his +brethren at the Shining Light Chapel, where he was superintendant of +the Sunday School, or 'Misery' or 'Nimrod'; as he was named behind his +back by the workmen over whom he tyrannized, was the general or walking +foreman or 'manager' of the firm whose card is herewith presented to +the reader: + + + RUSHTON & CO. + MUGSBOROUGH + ------- + Builders, Decorators, and General Contractors + FUNERALS FURNISHED + Estimates given for General Repairs to House Property + First-class Work only at Moderate Charges + + +There were a number of sub-foremen or 'coddies', but Hunter was THE +foreman. + +He was a tall, thin man whose clothes hung loosely on the angles of his +round-shouldered, bony form. His long, thin legs, about which the +baggy trousers draped in ungraceful folds, were slightly knock-kneed +and terminated in large, flat feet. His arms were very long even for +such a tall man, and the huge, bony hands were gnarled and knotted. +When he removed his bowler hat, as he frequently did to wipe away with +a red handkerchief the sweat occasioned by furious bicycle riding, it +was seen that his forehead was high, flat and narrow. His nose was a +large, fleshy, hawklike beak, and from the side of each nostril a deep +indentation extended downwards until it disappeared in the dropping +moustache that concealed his mouth, the vast extent of which was +perceived only when he opened it to bellow at the workmen his +exhortations to greater exertions. His chin was large and +extraordinarily long. The eyes were pale blue, very small and close +together, surmounted by spare, light-, almost invisible +eyebrows, with a deep vertical cleft between them over the nose. His +head, covered with thick, coarse brown hair, was very large at the +back; the ears were small and laid close to the head. If one were to +make a full-face drawing of his cadaverous visage it would be found +that the outline resembled that of the lid of a coffin. + +This man had been with Rushton--no one had ever seen the 'Co.'--for +fifteen years, in fact almost from the time when the latter commenced +business. Rushton had at that period realized the necessity of having +a deputy who could be used to do all the drudgery and running about so +that he himself might be free to attend to the more pleasant or +profitable matters. Hunter was then a journeyman, but was on the point +of starting on his own account, when Rushton offered him a constant job +as foreman, two pounds a week, and two and a half per cent of the +profits of all work done. On the face of it this appeared a generous +offer. Hunter closed with it, gave up the idea of starting for +himself, and threw himself heart and mind into the business. When an +estimate was to be prepared it was Hunter who measured up the work and +laboriously figured out the probably cost. When their tenders were +accepted it was he who superintended the work and schemed how to scamp +it, where possible, using mud where mortar was specified, mortar where +there ought to have been cement, sheet zinc where they were supposed to +put sheet lead, boiled oil instead of varnish, and three coats of paint +where five were paid for. In fact, scamping the work was with this man +a kind of mania. It grieved him to see anything done properly. Even +when it was more economical to do a thing well, he insisted from force +of habit on having it scamped. Then he was almost happy, because he +felt that he was doing someone down. If there were an architect +superintending the work, Misery would square him or bluff him. If it +were not possible to do either, at least he had a try; and in the +intervals of watching, driving and bullying the hands, his vulture eye +was ever on the look out for fresh jobs. His long red nose was thrust +into every estate agent's office in the town in the endeavour to smell +out what properties had recently changed hands or been let, in order +that he might interview the new owners and secure the order for +whatever alterations or repairs might be required. He it was who +entered into unholy compacts with numerous charwomen and nurses of the +sick, who in return for a small commission would let him know when some +poor sufferer was passing away and would recommend Rushton & Co. to the +bereaved and distracted relatives. By these means often--after first +carefully inquiring into the financial position of the stricken +family--Misery would contrive to wriggle his unsavoury carcass into the +house of sorrow, seeking, even in the chamber of death, to further the +interests of Rushton & Co. and to earn his miserable two and a half per +cent. + +It was to make possible the attainment of this object that Misery +slaved and drove and schemed and cheated. It was for this that the +workers' wages were cut down to the lowest possible point and their +offspring went ill clad, ill shod and ill fed, and were driven forth to +labour while they were yet children, because their fathers were unable +to earn enough to support their homes. + +Fifteen years! + +Hunter realized now that Rushton had had considerably the best of the +bargain. In the first place, it will be seen that the latter had +bought over one who might have proved a dangerous competitor, and now, +after fifteen years, the business that had been so laboriously built +up, mainly by Hunter's energy, industry and unscrupulous cunning, +belonged to Rushton & Co. Hunter was but an employee, liable to +dismissal like any other workman, the only difference being that he was +entitled to a week's notice instead of an hour's notice, and was but +little better off financially than when he started for the firm. + +Fifteen years! + +Hunter knew now that he had been used, but he also knew that it was too +late to turn back. He had not saved enough to make a successful start +on his own account even if he had felt mentally and physically capable +of beginning all over again, and if Rushton were to discharge him right +now he was too old to get a job as a journeyman. Further, in his zeal +for Rushton & Co. and his anxiety to earn his commission, he had often +done things that had roused the animosity of rival firms to such an +extent that it was highly improbable that any of them would employ him, +and even if they would, Misery's heart failed him at the thought of +having to meet on an equal footing those workmen whom he had tyrannized +over and oppressed. It was for these reasons that Hunter was as +terrified of Rushton as the hands were of himself. + +Over the men stood Misery, ever threatening them with dismissal and +their wives and children with hunger. Behind Misery was Rushton, ever +bullying and goading him on to greater excesses and efforts for the +furtherance of the good cause--which was to enable the head of the firm +to accumulate money. + +Mr Hunter, at the moment when the reader first makes his acquaintance +on the afternoon of the day when the incidents recorded in the first +chapter took place, was executing a kind of strategic movement in the +direction of the house where Crass and his mates were working. He kept +to one side of the road because by so doing he could not be perceived +by those within the house until the instant of his arrival. When he was +within about a hundred yards of the gate he dismounted from his +bicycle, there being a sharp rise in the road just there, and as he +toiled up, pushing the bicycle in front, his breath showing in white +clouds in the frosty air, he observed a number of men hanging about. +Some of them he knew; they had worked for him at various times, but +were now out of a job. There were five men altogether; three of them +were standing in a group, the other two stood each by himself, being +apparently strangers to each other and the first three. The three men +who stood together were nearest to Hunter and as the latter approached, +one of them advanced to meet him. + +'Good afternoon, sir.' + +Hunter replied by an inarticulate grunt, without stopping; the man +followed. + +'Any chance of a job, sir?' + +'Full up,' replied Hunter, still without stopping. The man still +followed, like a beggar soliciting charity. + +'Be any use calling in a day or so, sir?' + +'Don't think so,' Hunter replied. 'Can if you like; but we're full up.' + +'Thank you, sir,' said the man, and turned back to his friends. + +By this time Hunter was within a few yards of one of the other two men, +who also came to speak to him. This man felt there was no hope of +getting a job; still, there was no harm in asking. Besides, he was +getting desperate. It was over a month now since he had finished up +for his last employer. It had been a very slow summer altogether. +Sometimes a fortnight for one firm; then perhaps a week doing nothing; +then three weeks or a month for another firm, then out again, and so +on. And now it was November. Last winter they had got into debt; +that was nothing unusual, but owing to the bad summer they had not been +able, as in other years, to pay off the debts accumulated in winter. +It was doubtful, too, whether they would be able to get credit again +this winter. In fact this morning when his wife sent their little girl +to the grocer's for some butter the latter had refused to let the child +have it without the money. So although he felt it to be useless he +accosted Hunter. + +This time Hunter stopped: he was winded by his climb up the hill. + +'Good afternoon, sir.' Hunter did not return the salutation; he had not +the breath to spare, but the man was not hurt; he was used to being +treated like that. + +'Any chance of a job, sir?' + +Hunter did not reply at once. He was short of breath and he was +thinking of a plan that was ever recurring to his mind, and which he +had lately been hankering to put into execution. It seemed to him that +the long waited for opportunity had come. Just now Rushton & Co. were +almost the only firm in Mugsborough who had any work. There were +dozens of good workmen out. Yes, this was the time. If this man +agreed he would give him a start. Hunter knew the man was a good +workman, he had worked for Rushton & Co. before. To make room for him +old Linden and some other full-price man could be got rid of; it would +not be difficult to find some excuse. + +'Well,' Hunter said at last in a doubtful, hesitating kind of way, 'I'm +afraid not, Newman. We're about full up.' + +He ceased speaking and remained waiting for the other to say something +more. He did not look at the man, but stooped down, fidgeting with the +mechanism of the bicycle as if adjusting it. + +'Things have been so bad this summer,' Newman went on. 'I've had +rather a rough time of it. I would be very glad of a job even if it +was only for a week or so.' + +There was a pause. After a while, Hunter raised his eyes to the +other's face, but immediately let them fall again. + +'Well,' said he, 'I might--perhaps--be able to let you have a day or +two. You can come here to this job,' and he nodded his head in the +direction of the house where the men were working. 'Tomorrow at seven. +Of course you know the figure?' he added as Newman was about to thank +him. 'Six and a half.' + +Hunter spoke as if the reduction were already an accomplished fact. The +man was more likely to agree, if he thought that others were already +working at the reduced rate. + +Newman was taken by surprise and hesitated. He had never worked under +price; indeed, he had sometimes gone hungry rather than do so; but now +it seemed that others were doing it. And then he was so awfully hard +up. If he refused this job he was not likely to get another in a +hurry. He thought of his home and his family. Already they owed five +weeks' rent, and last Monday the collector had hinted pretty plainly +that the landlord would not wait much longer. Not only that, but if he +did not get a job how were they to live? This morning he himself had +had no breakfast to speak of, only a cup of tea and some dry bread. +These thoughts crowded upon each other in his mind, but still he +hesitated. Hunter began to move off. + +'Well,' he said, 'if you like to start you can come here at seven in +the morning.' Then as Newman still hesitated he added impatiently, +'Are you coming or not?' + +'Yes, sir,' said Newman. + +'All right,' said Hunter, affably. 'I'll tell Crass to have a kit +ready for you.' + +He nodded in a friendly way to the man, who went off feeling like a +criminal. + +As Hunter resumed his march, well pleased with himself, the fifth man, +who had been waiting all this time, came to meet him. As he +approached, Hunter recognized him as one who had started work for +Rushton & Co early in the summer, but who had left suddenly of his own +accord, having taken offence at some bullying remark of Hunter's. + +Hunter was glad to see this man. He guessed that the fellow must be +very hard pressed to come again and ask for work after what had +happened. + +'Any chance of a job, sir?' + +Hunter appeared to reflect. + +'I believe I have room for one,' he said at length. 'But you're such +an uncertain kind of chap. You don't seem to care much whether you +work or not. You're too independent, you know; one can't say two words +to you but you must needs clear off.' + +The man made no answer. + +'We can't tolerate that kind of thing, you know,' Hunter added. 'If we +were to encourage men of your stamp we should never know where we are.' + +So saying, Hunter moved away and again proceeded on his journey. + +When he arrived within about three yards of the gate he noiselessly +laid his machine against the garden fence. The high evergreens that +grew inside still concealed him from the observation of anyone who +might be looking out of the windows of the house. Then he carefully +crept along till he came to the gate post, and bending down, he +cautiously peeped round to see if he could detect anyone idling, or +talking, or smoking. There was no one in sight except old Jack Linden, +who was rubbing down the lobby doors with pumice-stone and water. +Hunter noiselessly opened the gate and crept quietly along the grass +border of the garden path. His idea was to reach the front door +without being seen, so that Linden could not give notice of his +approach to those within. In this he succeeded and passed silently +into the house. He did not speak to Linden; to do so would have +proclaimed his presence to the rest. He crawled stealthily over the +house but was disappointed in his quest, for everyone he saw was hard +at work. Upstairs he noticed that the door of one of the rooms was +closed. + +Old Joe Philpot had been working in this room all day, washing off the +old whitewash from the ceiling and removing the old papers from the +walls with a broad bladed, square topped knife called a stripper. +Although it was only a small room, Joe had had to tear into the work +pretty hard all the time, for the ceiling seemed to have had two or +three coats of whitewash without ever having been washed off, and there +were several thicknesses of paper on the walls. The difficulty of +removing these papers was increased by the fact that there was a dado +which had been varnished. In order to get this off it had been +necessary to soak it several times with strong soda water, and although +Joe was as careful as possible he had not been able to avoid getting +some of this stuff on his fingers. The result was that his nails were +all burnt and discoloured and the flesh round them cracked and +bleeding. However, he had got it all off at last, and he was not +sorry, for his right arm and shoulder were aching from the prolonged +strain and in the palm of the right hand there was a blister as large +as a shilling, caused by the handle of the stripping knife. + +All the old paper being off, Joe washed down the walls with water, and +having swept the paper into a heap in the middle of the floor, he mixed +with a small trowel some cement on a small board and proceeded to stop +up the cracks and holes in the walls and ceiling. After a while, +feeling very tired, it occurred to him that he deserved a spell and a +smoke for five minutes. He closed the door and placed a pair of steps +against it. There were two windows in the room almost opposite each +other; these he opened wide in order that the smoke and smell of his +pipe might be carried away. Having taken these precautions against +surprise, he ascended to the top of the step ladder that he had laid +against the door and sat down at ease. Within easy reach was the top +of a cupboard where he had concealed a pint of beer in a bottle. To +this he now applied himself. Having taken a long pull at the bottle, +he tenderly replaced it on the top of the cupboard and proceeded to +'hinjoy' a quiet smoke, remarking to himself: + +'This is where we get some of our own back.' + +He held, however, his trowel in one hand, ready for immediate action in +case of interruption. + +Philpot was about fifty-five years old. He wore no white jacket, only +an old patched apron; his trousers were old, very soiled with paint and +ragged at the bottoms of the legs where they fell over the +much-patched, broken and down-at-heel boots. The part of his waistcoat +not protected by his apron was covered with spots of dried paint. He +wore a shirt and a 'dickey' which was very soiled and covered +with splashes of paint, and one side of it was projecting from the +opening of the waistcoat. His head was covered with an old cap, heavy +and shining with paint. He was very thin and stooped slightly. +Although he was really only fifty-five, he looked much older, for he +was prematurely aged. + +He had not been getting his own back for quite five minutes when Hunter +softly turned the handle of the lock. Philpot immediately put out his +pipe and descending from his perch opened the door. When Hunter +entered Philpot closed it again and, mounting the steps, went on +stripping the wall just above. Nimrod looked at him suspiciously, +wondering why the door had been closed. He looked all round the room +but could see nothing to complain of. He sniffed the air to try if he +could detect the odour of tobacco, and if he had not been suffering a +cold in the head there is no doubt that he would have perceived it. +However, as it was he could smell nothing but all the same he was not +quite satisfied, although he remembered that Crass always gave Philpot +a good character. + +'I don't like to have men working on a job like this with the door +shut,' he said at length. 'It always gives me the idear that the man's +'avin a mike. You can do what you're doin' just as well with the door +open.' + +Philpot, muttering something about it being all the same to him--shut +or open--got down from the steps and opened the door. Hunter went out +again without making any further remark and once more began crawling +over the house. + +Owen was working by himself in a room on the same floor as Philpot. He +was at the window, burning off with a paraffin torch-lamp those parts +of the old paintwork that were blistered and cracked. + +In this work the flame of the lamp is directed against the old paint, +which becomes soft and is removed with a chisel knife, or a scraper +called a shavehook. The door was ajar and he had opened the top sash +of the window for the purpose of letting in some fresh air, because the +atmosphere of the room was foul with the fumes of the lamp and the +smell of the burning paint, besides being heavy with moisture. The +ceiling had only just been water washed and the walls had just been +stripped. The old paper, saturated with water, was piled up in a heap +in the middle of the floor. + +Presently, as he was working he began to feel conscious of some other +presence in the room; he looked round. The door was open about six +inches and in the opening appeared a long, pale face with a huge chin, +surmounted by a bowler hat and ornamented with a large red nose, a +drooping moustache and two small, glittering eyes set very close +together. For some seconds this apparition regarded Owen intently, +then it was silently withdrawn, and he was again alone. He had been so +surprised and startled that he had nearly dropped the lamp, and now +that the ghastly countenance was gone, Owen felt the blood surge into +his own cheeks. He trembled with suppressed fury and longed to be able +to go out there on the landing and hurl the lamp into Hunter's face. + +Meanwhile, on the landing outside Owen's door, Hunter stood thinking. +Someone must be got rid of to make room for the cheap man tomorrow. He +had hoped to catch somebody doing something that would have served as +an excuse for instant dismissal, but there was now no hope of that +happening. What was to be done? He would like to get rid of Linden, +who was now really too old to be of much use, but as the old man had +worked for Rushton on and off for many years, Hunter felt that he could +scarcely sack him off hand without some reasonable pretext. Still, the +fellow was really not worth the money he was getting. Sevenpence an +hour was an absurdly large wage for an old man like him. It was +preposterous: he would have to go, excuse or no excuse. + +Hunter crawled downstairs again. + +Jack Linden was about sixty-seven years old, but like Philpot, and as +is usual with working men, he appeared older, because he had had to +work very hard all his life, frequently without proper food and +clothing. His life had been passed in the midst of a civilization +which he had never been permitted to enjoy the benefits of. But of +course he knew nothing about all this. He had never expected or wished +to be allowed to enjoy such things; he had always been of opinion that +they were never intended for the likes of him. He called himself a +Conservative and was very patriotic. + +At the time when the Boer War commenced, Linden was an enthusiastic +jingo: his enthusiasm had been somewhat damped when his youngest son, a +reservist, had to go to the front, where he died of fever and exposure. +When this soldier son went away, he left his wife and two children, +aged respectively four and five years at that time, in his father's +care. After he died they stayed on with the old people. The young +woman earned a little occasionally by doing needlework, but was really +dependent on her father-in-law. Notwithstanding his poverty, he was +glad to have them in the house, because of late years his wife had been +getting very feeble, and, since the shock occasioned by the news of the +death of her son, needed someone constantly with her. + +Linden was still working at the vestibule doors when the manager came +downstairs. Misery stood watching him for some minutes without +speaking. At last he said loudly: + +'How much longer are you going to be messing about those doors? Why +don't you get them under colour? You were fooling about there when I +was here this morning. Do you think it'll pay to have you playing +about there hour after hour with a bit of pumice stone? Get the work +done! Or if you don't want to, I'll very soon find someone else who +does! I've been noticing your style of doing things for some time past +and I want you to understand that you can't play the fool with me. +There's plenty of better men than you walking about. If you can't do +more than you've been doing lately you can clear out; we can do without +you even when we're busy.' + +Old Jack trembled. He tried to answer, but was unable to speak. If he +had been a slave and had failed to satisfy his master, the latter might +have tied him up somewhere and thrashed him. Hunter could not do that; +he could only take his food away. Old Jack was frightened--it was not +only HIS food that might be taken away. At last, with a great effort, +for the words seemed to stick in his throat, he said: + +'I must clean the work down, sir, before I go on painting.' + +'I'm not talking about what you're doing, but the time it takes you to +do it!' shouted Hunter. 'And I don't want any back answers or argument +about it. You must move yourself a bit quicker or leave it alone +altogether.' + +Linden did not answer: he went on with his work, his hand trembling to +such an extent that he was scarcely able to hold the pumice stone. + +Hunter shouted so loud that his voice filled all the house. Everyone +heard and was afraid. Who would be the next? they thought. + +Finding that Linden made no further answer, Misery again began walking +about the house. + +As he looked at them the men did their work in a nervous, clumsy, hasty +sort of way. They made all sorts of mistakes and messes. Payne, the +foreman carpenter, was putting some new boards on a part of the +drawing-room floor: he was in such a state of panic that, while driving +a nail, he accidentally struck the thumb of his left hand a severe blow +with his hammer. Bundy was also working in the drawing-room putting +some white-glazed tiles in the fireplace. Whilst cutting one of these +in half in order to fit it into its place, he inflicted a deep gash on +one of his fingers. He was afraid to leave off to bind it up while +Hunter was there, and consequently as he worked the white tiles became +all smeared and spattered with blood. Easton, who was working with +Harlow on a plank, washing off the old distemper from the hall ceiling, +was so upset that he was scarcely able to stand on the plank, and +presently the brush fell from his trembling hand with a crash upon the +floor. + +Everyone was afraid. They knew that it was impossible to get a job for +any other firm. They knew that this man had the power to deprive them +of the means of earning a living; that he possessed the power to +deprive their children of bread. + +Owen, listening to Hunter over the banisters upstairs, felt that he +would like to take him by the throat with one hand and smash his face +in with the other. + +And then? + +Why then he would be sent to gaol, or at the best he would lose his +employment: his food and that of his family would be taken away. That +was why he only ground his teeth and cursed and beat the wall with his +clenched fist. So! and so! and so! + +If it were not for them! + +Owen's imagination ran riot. + +First he would seize him by the collar with his left hand, dig his +knuckles into his throat, force him up against the wall and then, with +his right fist, smash! smash! smash! until Hunter's face was all cut +and covered with blood. + +But then, what about those at home? Was it not braver and more manly +to endure in silence? + +Owen leaned against the wall, white-faced, panting and exhausted. + +Downstairs, Misery was still going to and fro in the house and walking +up and down in it. Presently he stopped to look at Sawkins' work. This +man was painting the woodwork of the back staircase. Although the old +paintwork here was very dirty and greasy, Misery had given orders that +it was not to be cleaned before being painted. + +'Just dust it down and slobber the colour on,' he had said. +Consequently, when Crass made the paint, he had put into it an extra +large quantity of dryers. To a certain extent this destroyed the +'body' of the colour: it did not cover well; it would require two +coats. When Hunter perceived this he was furious. He was sure it +could be made to do with one coat with a little care; he believed +Sawkins was doing it like this on purpose. Really, these men seemed to +have no conscience. + +Two coats! and he had estimated for only three. + +'Crass!' + +'Yes, sir.' + +'Come here!' + +'Yes, sir.' + +Crass came hurrying along. + +'What's the meaning of this? Didn't I tell you to make this do with +one coat? Look at it!' + +'It's like this, sir,' said Crass. 'If it had been washed down--' + +'Washed down be damned,' shouted Hunter. 'The reason is that the +colour ain't thick enough. Take the paint and put a little more body +in it and we'll soon see whether it can be done or not. I can make it +cover if you can't.' + +Crass took the paint, and, superintended by Hunter, made it thicker. +Misery then seized the brush and prepared to demonstrate the +possibility of finishing the work with one coat. Crass and Sawkins +looked on in silence. + +Just as Misery was about to commence he fancied he heard someone +whispering somewhere. He laid down the brush and crawled stealthily +upstairs to see who it was. Directly his back was turned Crass seized +a bottle of oil that was standing near and, tipping about half a pint +of it into the paint, stirred it up quickly. Misery returned almost +immediately: he had not caught anyone; it must have been fancy. He +took up the brush and began to paint. The result was worse than +Sawkins! + +He messed and fooled about for some time, but could not make it come +right. At last he gave it up. + +'I suppose it'll have to have two coats after all,' he said, +mournfully. 'But it's a thousand pities.' + +He almost wept. + +The firm would be ruined if things went on like this. + +'You'd better go on with it,' he said as he laid down the brush. + +He began to walk about the house again. He wanted to go away now, but +he did not want them to know that he was gone, so he sneaked out of the +back door, crept around the house and out of the gate, mounted his +bicycle and rode away. + +No one saw him go. + +For some time the only sounds that broke the silence were the noises +made by the hands as they worked. The musical ringing of Bundy's +trowel, the noise of the carpenters' hammers and saws and the +occasional moving of a pair of steps. + +No one dared to speak. + +At last Philpot could stand it no longer. He was very thirsty. + +He had kept the door of his room open since Hunter arrived. + +He listened intently. He felt certain that Hunter must be gone: he +looked across the landing and could see Owen working in the front room. +Philpot made a little ball of paper and threw it at him to attract his +attention. Owen looked round and Philpot began to make signals: he +pointed downwards with one hand and jerked the thumb of the other over +his shoulder in the direction of the town, winking grotesquely the +while. This Owen interpreted to be an inquiry as to whether Hunter had +departed. He shook his head and shrugged his shoulders to intimate +that he did not know. + +Philpot cautiously crossed the landing and peeped furtively over the +banisters, listening breathlessly. 'Was it gorn or not?' he wondered. + +He crept along on tiptoe towards Owen's room, glancing left and right, +the trowel in his hand, and looking like a stage murderer. 'Do you +think it's gorn?' he asked in a hoarse whisper when he reached Owen's +door. + +'I don't know,' replied Owen in a low tone. + +Philpot wondered. He MUST have a drink, but it would never do for +Hunter to see him with the bottle: he must find out somehow whether he +was gone or not. + +At last an idea came. He would go downstairs to get some more cement. +Having confided this plan to Owen, he crept quietly back to the room in +which he had been working, then he walked noisily across the landing +again. + +'Got a bit of stopping to spare, Frank?' he asked in a loud voice. + +'No,' replied Owen. 'I'm not using it.' + +'Then I suppose I'll have to go down and get some. Is there anything I +can bring up for you?' + +'No, thanks,' replied Owen. + +Philpot marched boldly down to the scullery, which Crass had utilized +as a paint-shop. Crass was there mixing some colour. + +'I want a bit of stopping,' Philpot said as he helped himself to some. + +'Is the b--r gorn?' whispered Crass. + +'I don't know,' replied Philpot. 'Where's his bike?' + +''E always leaves it outside the gate, so's we can't see it,' replied +Crass. + +'Tell you what,' whispered Philpot, after a pause. 'Give the boy a +hempty bottle and let 'im go to the gate and look to the bikes there. +If Misery sees him 'e can pretend to be goin' to the shop for some +hoil.' + +This was done. Bert went to the gate and returned almost immediately: +the bike was gone. As the good news spread through the house a chorus +of thanksgiving burst forth. + +'Thank Gord!' said one. + +'Hope the b--r falls orf and breaks 'is bloody neck,' said another. + +'These Bible-thumpers are all the same; no one ever knew one to be any +good yet,' cried a third. + +Directly they knew for certain that he was gone, nearly everyone left +off work for a few minutes to curse him. Then they again went on +working and now that they were relieved of the embarrassment that +Misery's presence inspired, they made better progress. A few of them +lit their pipes and smoked as they worked. + +One of these was old Jack Linden. He was upset by the bullying he had +received, and when he noticed some of the others smoking he thought he +would have a pipe; it might steady his nerves. As a rule he did not +smoke when working; it was contrary to orders. + +As Philpot was returning to work again he paused for a moment to +whisper to Linden, with the result that the latter accompanied him +upstairs. + +On reaching Philpot's room the latter placed the step-ladder near the +cupboard and, taking down the bottle of beer, handed it to Linden with +the remark, 'Get some of that acrost yer, matey; it'll put yer right.' + +While Linden was taking a hasty drink, Joe kept watch on the landing +outside in case Hunter should suddenly and unexpectedly reappear. + +When Linden was gone downstairs again, Philpot, having finished what +remained of the beer and hidden the bottle up the chimney, resumed the +work of stopping up the holes and cracks in the ceiling and walls. He +must make a bit of a show tonight or there would be a hell of a row +when Misery came in the morning. + +Owen worked on in a disheartened, sullen way. He felt like a beaten +dog. + +He was more indignant on poor old Linden's account than on his own, and +was oppressed by a sense of impotence and shameful degradation. + +All his life it had been the same: incessant work under similar more or +less humiliating conditions, and with no more result than being just +able to avoid starvation. + +And the future, as far as he could see, was as hopeless as the past; +darker, for there would surely come a time, if he lived long enough, +when he would be unable to work any more. + +He thought of his child. Was he to be a slave and a drudge all his +life also? + +It would be better for the boy to die now. + +As Owen thought of his child's future there sprung up within him a +feeling of hatred and fury against the majority of his fellow workmen. + +THEY WERE THE ENEMY. Those who not only quietly submitted like so many +cattle to the existing state of things, but defended it, and opposed +and ridiculed any suggestion to alter it. + +THEY WERE THE REAL OPPRESSORS--the men who spoke of themselves as 'The +likes of us,' who, having lived in poverty and degradation all their +lives considered that what had been good enough for them was good +enough for the children they had been the cause of bringing into +existence. + +He hated and despised them because they calmly saw their children +condemned to hard labour and poverty for life, and deliberately refused +to make any effort to secure for them better conditions than those they +had themselves. + +It was because they were indifferent to the fate of THEIR children that +he would be unable to secure a natural and human life for HIS. It was +their apathy or active opposition that made it impossible to establish +a better system of society under which those who did their fair share +of the world's work would be honoured and rewarded. Instead of helping +to do this, they abased themselves, and grovelled before their +oppressors, and compelled and taught their children to do the same. +THEY were the people who were really responsible for the continuance of +the present system. + +Owen laughed bitterly to himself. What a very comical system it was. + +Those who worked were looked upon with contempt, and subjected to every +possible indignity. Nearly everything they produced was taken away +from them and enjoyed by the people who did nothing. And then the +workers bowed down and grovelled before those who had robbed them of +the fruits of their labour and were childishly grateful to them for +leaving anything at all. + +No wonder the rich despised them and looked upon them as dirt. They +WERE despicable. They WERE dirt. They admitted it and gloried in it. + +While these thoughts were seething in Owen's mind, his fellow workmen +were still patiently toiling on downstairs. Most of them had by this +time dismissed Hunter from their thoughts. They did not take things so +seriously as Owen. They flattered themselves that they had more sense +than that. It could not be altered. Grin and bear it. After all, it +was only for life! Make the best of things, and get your own back +whenever you get a chance. + +Presently Harlow began to sing. He had a good voice and it was a good +song, but his mates just then did not appreciate either one of the +other. His singing was the signal for an outburst of exclamations and +catcalls. + +'Shut it, for Christ's sake!' + +'That's enough of that bloody row!' + +And so on. Harlow stopped. + +'How's the enemy?' asked Easton presently, addressing no one in +particular. + +'Don't know,' replied Bundy. 'It must be about half past four. Ask +Slyme; he's got a watch.' + +It was a quarter past four. + +'It gets dark very early now,' said Easton. + +'Yes,' replied Bundy. 'It's been very dull all day. I think it's +goin' to rain. Listen to the wind.' + +'I 'ope not,' replied Easton. 'That means a wet shirt goin' 'ome.' + +He called out to old Jack Linden, who was still working at the front +doors: + +'Is it raining, Jack?' + +Old Jack, his pipe still in his mouth, turned to look at the weather. +It was raining, but Linden did not see the large drops which splashed +heavily upon the ground. He saw only Hunter, who was standing at the +gate, watching him. For a few seconds the two men looked at each other +in silence. Linden was paralysed with fear. Recovering himself, he +hastily removed his pipe, but it was too late. + +Misery strode up. + +'I don't pay you for smoking,' he said, loudly. 'Make out your time +sheet, take it to the office and get your money. I've had enough of +you!' + +Jack made no attempt to defend himself: he knew it was of no use. He +silently put aside the things he had been using, went into the room +where he had left his tool-bag and coat, removed his apron and white +jacket, folded them up and put them into his tool-bag along with the +tools he had been using--a chisel-knife and a shavehook--put on his +coat, and, with the tool-bag slung over his shoulder, went away from +the house. + +Without speaking to anyone else, Hunter then hastily walked over the +place, noting what progress had been made by each man during his +absence. He then rode away, as he wanted to get to the office in time +to give Linden his money. + +It was now very cold and dark within the house, and as the gas was not +yet laid on, Crass distributed a number of candles to the men, who +worked silently, each occupied with his own gloomy thoughts. Who would +be the next? + +Outside, sombre masses of lead- clouds gathered ominously in +the tempestuous sky. The gale roared loudly round the old-fashioned +house and the windows rattled discordantly. Rain fell in torrents. + +They said it meant getting wet through going home, but all the same, +Thank God it was nearly five o'clock! + + + +Chapter 3 + +The Financiers + + +That night as Easton walked home through the rain he felt very +depressed. It had been a very bad summer for most people and he had +not fared better than the rest. A few weeks with one firm, a few days +with another, then out of a job, then on again for a month perhaps, and +so on. + +William Easton was a man of medium height, about twenty-three years +old, with fair hair and moustache and blue eyes. He wore a stand-up +collar with a tie and his clothes, though shabby, were clean +and neat. + +He was married: his wife was a young woman whose acquaintance he had +made when he happened to be employed with others painting the outside +of the house where she was a general servant. They had 'walked out' +for about fifteen months. Easton had been in no hurry to marry, for he +knew that, taking good times with bad, his wages did no average a pound +a week. At the end of that time, however, he found that he could not +honourably delay longer, so they were married. + +That was twelve months ago. + +As a single man he had never troubled much if he happened to be out of +work; he always had enough to live on and pocket money besides; but now +that he was married it was different; the fear of being 'out' haunted +him all the time. + +He had started for Rushton & Co. on the previous Monday after having +been idle for three weeks, and as the house where he was working had to +be done right through he had congratulated himself on having secured a +job that would last till Christmas; but he now began to fear that what +had befallen Jack Linden might also happen to himself at any time. He +would have to be very careful not to offend Crass in any way. He was +afraid the latter did not like him very much as it was. Easton knew +that Crass could get him the sack at any time, and would not scruple to +do so if he wanted to make room for some crony of his own. Crass was +the 'coddy' or foreman of the job. Considered as a workman he had no +very unusual abilities; he was if anything inferior to the majority of +his fellow workmen. But although he had but little real ability he +pretended to know everything, and the vague references he was in the +habit of making to 'tones', and 'shades', and 'harmony', had so +impressed Hunter that the latter had a high opinion of him as a +workman. It was by pushing himself forward in this way and by +judicious toadying to Hunter that Crass managed to get himself put in +charge of work. + +Although Crass did as little work as possible himself he took care that +the others worked hard. Any man who failed to satisfy him in this +respect he reported to Hunter as being 'no good', or 'too slow for a +funeral'. The result was that this man was dispensed with at the end +of the week. The men knew this, and most of them feared the wily Crass +accordingly, though there were a few whose known abilities placed them +to a certain extent above the reach of his malice. Frank Owen was one +of these. + +There were others who by the judicious administration of pipefuls of +tobacco and pints of beer, managed to keep in Crass's good graces and +often retained their employment when better workmen were 'stood off'. + +As he walked home through the rain thinking of these things, Easton +realized that it was not possible to foresee what a day or even an hour +might bring forth. + +By this time he had arrived at his home; it was a small house, one of a +long row of similar ones, and it contained altogether four rooms. + +The front door opened into a passage about two feet six inches wide and +ten feet in length, covered with oilcloth. At the end of the passage +was a flight of stairs leading to the upper part of the house. The +first door on the left led into the front sitting-room, an apartment +about nine feet square, with a bay window. This room was very rarely +used and was always very tidy and clean. The mantelpiece was of wood +painted black and ornamented with jagged streaks of red and yellow, +which were supposed to give it the appearance of marble. On the walls +was a paper with a pale terra-cotta ground and a pattern consisting of +large white roses with chocolate leaves and stalks. + +There was a small iron fender with fire-irons to match, and on the +mantelshelf stood a clock in a polished wood case, a pair of blue glass +vases, and some photographs in frames. The floor was covered with +oilcloth of a tile pattern in yellow and red. On the walls were two or +three framed prints such as are presented with Christmas +numbers of illustrated papers. There was also a photograph of a group +of Sunday School girls with their teachers with the church for the +background. In the centre of the room was a round deal table about +three feet six inches across, with the legs stained red to look like +mahogany. Against one wall was an old couch covered with faded +cretonne, four chairs to match standing backs to wall in different +parts of the room. The table was covered with a red cloth with a +yellow crewel work design in the centre and in each of the four +corners, the edges being overcast in the same material. On the table +were a lamp and a number of brightly bound books. + +Some of these things, as the couch and the chairs, Easton had bought +second-hand and had done up himself. The table, oilcloth, fender, +hearthrug, etc, had been obtained on the hire system and were not yet +paid for. The windows were draped with white lace curtains and in the +bay was a small bamboo table on which reposed a large Holy Bible, +cheaply but showily bound. + +If anyone had ever opened this book they would have found that its +pages were as clean as the other things in the room, and on the flyleaf +might have been read the following inscription: 'To dear Ruth, from her +loving friend Mrs Starvem with the prayer that God's word may be her +guide and that Jesus may be her very own Saviour. Oct. 12. 19--' + +Mrs Starvem was Ruth's former mistress, and this had been her parting +gift when Ruth left to get married. It was supposed to be a keepsake, +but as Ruth never opened the book and never willingly allowed her +thoughts to dwell upon the scenes of which it reminded her, she had +forgotten the existence of Mrs Starvem almost as completely as that +well-to-do and pious lady had forgotten hers. + +For Ruth, the memory of the time she spent in the house of 'her loving +friend' was the reverse of pleasant. It comprised a series of +recollections of petty tyrannies, insults and indignities. Six years +of cruelly excessive work, beginning every morning two or three hours +before the rest of the household were awake and ceasing only when she +went exhausted to bed, late at night. + +She had been what is called a 'slavey' but if she had been really a +slave her owner would have had some regard for her health and welfare: +her 'loving friend' had had none. Mrs Starvem's only thought had been +to get out of Ruth the greatest possible amount of labour and to give +her as little as possible in return. + +When Ruth looked back upon that dreadful time she saw it, as one might +say, surrounded by a halo of religion. She never passed by a chapel or +heard the name of God, or the singing of a hymn, without thinking of +her former mistress. To have looked into this Bible would have +reminded her of Mrs Starvem; that was one of the reasons why the book +reposed, unopened and unread, a mere ornament on the table in the bay +window. + +The second door in the passage near the foot of the stairs led into the +kitchen or living-room: from here another door led into the scullery. +Upstairs were two bedrooms. + +As Easton entered the house, his wife met him in the passage and asked +him not to make a noise as the child had just gone to sleep. They +kissed each other and she helped him to remove his wet overcoat. Then +they both went softly into the kitchen. + +This room was about the same size as the sitting-room. At one end was +a small range with an oven and a boiler, and a high mantelpiece painted +black. On the mantelshelf was a small round alarm clock and some +brightly polished tin canisters. At the other end of the room, facing +the fireplace, was a small dresser on the shelves of which were neatly +arranged a number of plates and dishes. The walls were papered with +oak paper. On one wall, between two almanacks, hung a tin +lamp with a reflector behind the light. In the middle of the room was +an oblong deal table with a white tablecloth upon which the tea things +were set ready. There were four kitchen chairs, two of which were +placed close to the table. Overhead, across the room, about eighteen +inches down from the ceiling, were stretched several cords upon which +were drying a number of linen or calico undergarments, a +shirt, and Easton's white apron and jacket. On the back of a chair at +one side of the fire more clothes were drying. At the other side on +the floor was a wicker cradle in which a baby was sleeping. Nearby +stood a chair with a towel hung on the back, arranged so as to shade +the infant's face from the light of the lamp. An air of homely comfort +pervaded the room; the atmosphere was warm, and the fire blazed +cheerfully over the whitened hearth. + +They walked softly over and stood by the cradle side looking at the +child; as they looked the baby kept moving uneasily in its sleep. Its +face was very flushed and its eyes were moving under the half-closed +lids. Every now and again its lips were drawn back slightly, showing +part of the gums; presently it began to whimper, drawing up its knees +as if in pain. + +'He seems to have something wrong with him,' said Easton. + +'I think it's his teeth,' replied the mother. 'He's been very restless +all day and he was awake nearly all last night.' + +'P'r'aps he's hungry.' + +'No, it can't be that. He had the best part of an egg this morning and +I've nursed him several times today. And then at dinner-time he had a +whole saucer full of fried potatoes with little bits of bacon in it.' + +Again the infant whimpered and twisted in its sleep, its lips drawn +back showing the gums: its knees pressed closely to its body, the +little fists clenched, and face flushed. Then after a few seconds it +became placid: the mouth resumed its usual shape; the limbs relaxed and +the child slumbered peacefully. + +'Don't you think he's getting thin?' asked Easton. 'It may be fancy, +but he don't seem to me to be as big now as he was three months ago.' + +'No, he's not quite so fat,' admitted Ruth. 'It's his teeth what's +wearing him out; he don't hardly get no rest at all with them.' + +They continued looking at him a little longer. Ruth thought he was a +very beautiful child: he would be eight months old on Sunday. They +were sorry they could do nothing to ease his pain, but consoled +themselves with the reflection that he would be all right once those +teeth were through. + +'Well, let's have some tea,' said Easton at last. + +Whilst he removed his wet boots and socks and placed them in front of +the fire to dry and put on dry socks and a pair of slippers in their +stead, Ruth half filled a tin basin with hot water from the boiler and +gave it to him, and he then went to the scullery, added some cold water +and began to wash the paint off his hands. This done he returned to +the kitchen and sat down at the table. + +'I couldn't think what to give you to eat tonight,' said Ruth as she +poured out the tea. 'I hadn't got no money left and there wasn't +nothing in the house except bread and butter and that piece of cheese, +so I cut some bread and butter and put some thin slices of cheese on it +and toasted it on a place in front of the fire. I hope you'll like it: +it was the best I could do.' + +'That's all right: it smells very nice anyway, and I'm very hungry.' + +As they were taking their tea Easton told his wife about Linden's +affair and his apprehensions as to what might befall himself. They +were both very indignant, and sorry for poor old Linden, but their +sympathy for him was soon forgotten in their fears for their own +immediate future. + +They remained at the table in silence for some time: then, + +'How much rent do we owe now?' asked Easton. + +'Four weeks, and I promised the collector the last time he called that +we'd pay two weeks next Monday. He was quite nasty about it.' + +'Well, I suppose you'll have to pay it, that's all,' said Easton. + +'How much money will you have tomorrow?' asked Ruth. + +He began to reckon up his time: he started on Monday and today was +Friday: five days, from seven to five, less half an hour for breakfast +and an hour for dinner, eight and a half hours a day--forty-two hours +and a half. At sevenpence an hour that came to one pound four and +ninepence halfpenny. + +'You know I only started on Monday,' he said, 'so there's no back day +to come. Tomorrow goes into next week.' + +'Yes, I know,' replied Ruth. + +'If we pay the two week's rent that'll leave us twelve shillings to +live on.' + +'But we won't be able to keep all of that,' said Ruth, 'because there's +other things to pay.' + +'What other things?' + +'We owe the baker eight shillings for the bread he let us have while +you were not working, and there's about twelve shillings owing for +groceries. We'll have to pay them something on account. Then we want +some more coal; there's only about a shovelful left, and--' + +'Wait a minnit,' said Easton. 'The best way is to write out a list of +everything we owe; then we shall know exactly where we are. You get me +a piece of paper and tell me what to write. Then we'll see what it all +comes to.' + +'Do you mean everything we owe, or everything we must pay tomorrow.' + +'I think we'd better make a list of all we owe first.' + +While they were talking the baby was sleeping restlessly, occasionally +uttering plaintive little cries. The mother now went and knelt at the +side of the cradle, which she gently rocked with one hand, patting the +infant with the other. + +'Except the furniture people, the biggest thing we owe is the rent,' +she said when Easton was ready to begin. + +'It seems to me,' said he, as, after having cleared a space on the +table and arranged the paper, he began to sharpen his pencil with a +table-knife, 'that you don't manage things as well as you might. If +you was to make a list of just the things you MUST have before you went +out of a Saturday, you'd find the money would go much farther. Instead +of doing that you just take the money in your hand without knowing +exactly what you're going to do with it, and when you come back it's +all gone and next to nothing to show for it.' + +His wife made no reply: her head was bent over the child. + +'Now, let's see,' went on her husband. 'First of all there's the rent. +How much did you say we owe?' + +'Four weeks. That's the three weeks you were out and this week.' + +'Four sixes is twenty-four; that's one pound four,' said Easton as he +wrote it down. 'Next?' + +'Grocer, twelve shillings.' + +Easton looked up in astonishment. + +'Twelve shillings. Why, didn't you tell me only the other day that +you'd paid up all we owed for groceries?' + +'Don't you remember we owed thirty-five shillings last spring? Well, +I've been paying that bit by bit all the summer. I paid the last of it +the week you finished your last job. Then you were out three weeks--up +till last Friday--and as we had nothing in hand I had to get what we +wanted without paying for it.' + +'But do you mean to say it cost us three shillings a week for tea and +sugar and butter?' + +'It's not only them. There's been bacon and eggs and cheese and other +things.' + +The man was beginning to become impatient. + +'Well,' he said, 'What else?' + +'We owe the baker eight shillings. We did owe nearly a pound, but I've +been paying it off a little at a time.' + +This was added to the list. + +'Then there's the milkman. I've not paid him for four weeks. He +hasn't sent a bill yet, but you can reckon it up; we have two penn'orth +every day.' + +'That's four and eight,' said Easton, writing it down. 'Anything else?' + +'One and seven to the greengrocer for potatoes, cabbage, and paraffin +oil.' + +'Anything else?' + +'We owe the butcher two and sevenpence.' + +'Why, we haven't had any meat for a long time,' said Easton. 'When was +it?' + +'Three weeks ago; don't you remember? A small leg of mutton,' + +'Oh, yes,' and he added the item. + +'Then there's the instalments for the furniture and oilcloth--twelve +shillings. A letter came from them today. And there's something +else.' + +She took three letters from the pocket of her dress and handed them to +him. + +'They all came today. I didn't show them to you before as I didn't +want to upset you before you had your tea.' + +Easton drew the first letter from its envelope. + + CORPORATION OF MUGSBOROUGH + General District and Special Rates + FINAL NOTICE + + MR W. EASTON, + + I have to remind you that the amount due from you as under, in + respect of the above Rates, has not been paid, and to request that + you will forward the same within Fourteen Days from this date. You + are hereby informed that after this notice no further call will be + made, or intimation given, before legal proceedings are taken to + enforce payment. + By order of the Council. + JAMES LEAH. + Collector, No. 2 District. + District Rate .......................... L- 13 11 + Special Rate ........................... 10 2 + ________ + L1 4 1 + +The second communication was dated from the office of the Assistant +Overseer of the Poor. It was also a Final Notice and was worded in +almost exactly the same way as the other, the principal difference +being that it was 'By order of the Overseers' instead of 'the Council'. +It demanded the sum of £1 1s 5-1/2d for Poor Rate within fourteen days, +and threatened legal proceedings in default. + +Easton laid this down and began to read the third letter-- + + J. DIDLUM & CO LTD. + Complete House Furnishers + QUALITY STREET, MUGSBOROUGH + + MR W. EASTON, + + SIR: + We have to remind you that three monthly payments of four shillings + each (12/- in all) became due on the first of this month, and we + must request you to let us have this amount BY RETURN OF POST. + + Under the terms of your agreement you guaranteed that the money + should be paid on the Saturday of every fourth week. To prevent + unpleasantness, we must request you for the future to forward the + full amount punctually upon that day. + + Yours truly, + J. DIDLUM & CO. LTD + +He read these communications several times in silence and finally with +an oath threw them down on the table. + +'How much do we still owe for the oilcloth and the furniture?' he asked. + +'I don't know exactly. It was seven pound odd, and we've had the +things about six months. We paid one pound down and three or four +instalments. I'll get the card if you like.' + +'No; never mind. Say we've paid one pound twelve; so we still owe +about six pound.' + +He added this amount to the list. + +'I think it's a great pity we ever had the things at all,' he said, +peevishly. 'It would have been better to have gone without until we +could pay cash for them: but you would have your way, of course. Now +we'll have this bloody debt dragging on us for years, and before the +dam stuff is paid for it'll be worn out.' + +The woman did not reply at once. She was bending down over the cradle +arranging the coverings which the restless movements of the child had +disordered. She was crying silently, unnoticed by her husband. + +For months past--in fact ever since the child was born--she had been +existing without sufficient food. If Easton was unemployed they had to +stint themselves so as to avoid getting further into debt than was +absolutely necessary. When he was working they had to go short in +order to pay what they owed; but of what there was Easton himself, +without knowing it, always had the greater share. If he was at work +she would pack into his dinner basket overnight the best there was in +the house. When he was out of work she often pretended, as she gave +him his meals, that she had had hers while he was out. And all the +time the baby was draining her life away and her work was never done. + +She felt very weak and weary as she crouched there, crying furtively +and trying not to let him see. + +At last she said, without looking round: + +'You know quite well that you were just as much in favour of getting +them as I was. If we hadn't got the oilcloth there would have been +illness in the house because of the way the wind used to come up +between the floorboards. Even now of a windy day the oilcloth moves up +and down.' + +'Well, I'm sure I don't know,' said Easton, as he looked alternatively +at the list of debts and the three letters. 'I give you nearly every +farthing I earn and I never interfere about anything, because I think +it's your part to attend to the house, but it seems to me you don't +manage things properly.' + +The woman suddenly burst into a passion of weeping, laying her head on +the seat of the chair that was standing near the cradle. + +Easton started up in surprise. + +'Why, what's the matter?' he said. + +Then as he looked down upon the quivering form of the sobbing woman, he +was ashamed. He knelt down by her, embracing her and apologizing, +protesting that he had not meant to hurt her like that. + +'I always do the best I can with the money,' Ruth sobbed. 'I never +spend a farthing on myself, but you don't seem to understand how hard +it is. I don't care nothing about having to go without things myself, +but I can't bear it when you speak to me like you do lately. You seem +to blame me for everything. You usen't to speak to me like that before +I--before--Oh, I am so tired--I am so tired, I wish I could lie down +somewhere and sleep and never wake up any more.' + +She turned away from him, half kneeling, half sitting on the floor, her +arms folded on the seat of the chair, and her head resting upon them. +She was crying in a heartbroken helpless way. + +'I'm sorry I spoke to you like that,' said Easton, awkwardly. 'I +didn't mean what I said. It's all my fault. I leave things too much +to you, and it's more than you can be expected to manage. I'll help +you to think things out in future; only forgive me, I'm very sorry. I +know you try your best.' + +She suffered him to draw her to him, laying her head on his shoulder as +he kissed and fondled her, protesting that he would rather be poor and +hungry with her than share riches with anyone else. + +The child in the cradle--who had been twisting and turning restlessly +all this time--now began to cry loudly. The mother took it from the +cradle and began to hush and soothe it, walking about the room and +rocking it in her arms. The child, however, continued to scream, so +she sat down to nurse it: for a little while the infant refused to +drink, struggling and kicking in its mother's arms, then for a few +minutes it was quite, taking the milk in a half-hearted, fretful way. +Then it began to scream and twist and struggle. + +They both looked at it in a helpless manner. Whatever could be the +matter with it? It must be those teeth. + +Then suddenly as they were soothing and patting him, the child vomited +all over its own and its mother's clothing a mass of undigested food. +Mingled with the curdled milk were fragments of egg, little bits of +bacon, bread and particles of potato. + +Having rid his stomach of this unnatural burden, the unfortunate baby +began to cry afresh, his face very pale, his lips colourless, and his +eyes red-rimmed and running with water. + +Easton walked about with him while Ruth cleaned up the mess and got +ready some fresh clothing. They both agreed that it was the coming +teeth that had upset the poor child's digestion. It would be a good +job when they were through. + +This work finished, Easton, who was still convinced in his own mind +that with the aid of a little common sense and judicious management +their affairs might be arranged more satisfactorily, said: + +'We may as well make a list of all the things we must pay and buy +tomorrow. The great thing is to think out exactly what you are going +to do before you spend anything; that saves you from getting things you +don't really need and prevents you forgetting the things you MUST have. +Now, first of all, the rent; two weeks, twelve shillings.' + +He took a fresh piece of paper and wrote this item down. + +'What else is there that we must pay or buy tomorrow?' + +'Well, you know I promised the baker and the grocer that I would begin +to pay them directly you got a job, and if I don't keep my word they +won't let us have anything another time, so you'd better put down two +shillings each for them. + +'I've got that,' said Easton. + +'Two and seven for the butcher. We must pay that. I'm ashamed to pass +the shop, because when I got the meat I promised to pay him the next +week, and it's nearly three weeks ago now.' + +'I've put that down. What else?' + +'A hundred of coal: one and six.' + +'Next?' + +'The instalment for the furniture and floor-cloth, twelve shillings.' + +'Next?' + +'We owe the milkman four weeks; we'd better pay one week on account; +that's one and two.' + +'Next?' + +'The greengrocer; one shilling on account.' + +'Anything else?' + +'We shall want a piece of meat of some kind; we've had none for nearly +three weeks. You'd better say one and six for that.' + +'That's down.' + +'One and nine for bread; that's one loaf a day.' + +'But I've got two shillings down for bread already,' said Easton. + +'Yes, I know, dear, but that's to go towards paying off what we owe, +and what you have down for the grocer and milkman's the same.' + +'Well, go on, for Christ's sake, and let's get it down,' said Easton, +irritably. + +'We can't say less than three shillings for groceries.' + +Easton looked carefully at his list. This time he felt sure that the +item was already down; but finding he was mistaken he said nothing and +added the amount. + +'Well, I've got that. What else?' + +'Milk, one and two.' + +'Next?' + +'Vegetables, eightpence.' + +'Yes.' + +'Paraffin oil and firewood, sixpence.' + +Again the financier scrutinized the list. He was positive that it was +down already. However, he could not find it, so the sixpence was added +to the column of figures. + +'Then there's your boots; you can't go about with them old things in +this weather much longer, and they won't stand mending again. You +remember the old man said they were not worth it when you had that +patch put on a few weeks ago.' + +'Yes. I was thinking of buying a new pair tomorrow. My socks was wet +through tonight. If it's raining some morning when I'm going out and I +have to work all day with wet feet I shall be laid up.' + +'At that second-hand shop down in High Street I saw when I was out this +afternoon a very good pair just your size, for two shillings.' + +Easton did not reply at once. He did not much fancy wearing the +cast-off boots of some stranger, who for all he knew might have +suffered from some disease, but then remembering that his old ones were +literally falling off his feet he realized that he had practically no +choice. + +'If you're quite sure they'll fit you'd better get them. It's better +to do that than for me to catch cold and be laid up for God knows how +long.' + +So the two shillings were added to the list. + +'Is there anything else?' + +'How much does it all come to now?' asked Ruth. + +Easton added it all up. When he had finished he remained staring at +the figures in consternation for a long time without speaking. + +'Jesus Christ!' he ejaculated at last. + +'What's it come to?' asked Ruth. + +'Forty-four and tenpence.' + +'I knew we wouldn't have enough,' said Ruth, wearily. 'Now if you +think I manage so badly, p'raps you can tell me which of these things +we ought to leave out.' + +'We'd be all right if it wasn't for the debts,' said Easton, doggedly. + +'When you're not working, we must either get into debt or starve.' + +Easton made no answer. + +'What'll we do about the rates?' asked Ruth. + +'I'm sure I don't know: there's nothing left to pawn except my black +coat and vest. You might get something on that.' + +'It'll have to be paid somehow,' said Ruth, 'or you'll be taken off to +jail for a month, the same as Mrs Newman's husband was last winter.' + +'Well, you'd better take the coat and vest and see what you can get on +'em tomorrow.' + +'Yes,' said Ruth; 'and there's that brown silk dress of mine--you know, +the one I wore when we was married--I might get something on that, +because we won't get enough on the coat and vest. I don't like parting +with the dress, although I never wear it; but we'll be sure to be able +to get it out again, won't we?' + +'Of course,' said Easton. + +They remained silent for some time, Easton staring at the list of debts +and the letters. She was wondering if he still thought she managed +badly, and what he would do about it. She knew she had always done her +best. At last she said, wistfully, trying to speak plainly for there +seemed to be a lump in her throat: 'And what about tomorrow? Would you +like to spend the money yourself, or shall I manage as I've done +before, or will you tell me what to do?' + +'I don't know, dear,' said Easton, sheepishly. 'I think you'd better +do as you think best.' + +'Oh, I'll manage all right, dear, you'll see,' replied Ruth, who seemed +to think it a sort of honour to be allowed to starve herself and wear +shabby clothes. + +The baby, who had been for some time quietly sitting upon his mother's +lap, looking wonderingly at the fire--his teeth appeared to trouble him +less since he got rid of the eggs and bacon and potatoes--now began to +nod and doze, which Easton perceiving, suggested that the infant should +not be allowed to go to sleep with an empty stomach, because it would +probably wake up hungry in the middle of the night. He therefore woke +him up as much as possible and mashed a little of the bread and toasted +cheese with a little warm milk. Then taking the baby from Ruth he +began to try to induce it to eat. As soon, however, as the child +understood his object, it began to scream at the top of its voice, +closing its lips firmly and turning its head rapidly from side to side +every time the spoon approached its mouth. It made such a dreadful +noise that Easton at last gave in. He began to walk about the room +with it, and presently the child sobbed itself to sleep. After putting +the baby into its cradle Ruth set about preparing Easton's breakfast +and packing it into his basket. This did not take very long, there +being only bread and butter--or, to be more correct, margarine. + +Then she poured what tea was left in the tea-pot into a small saucepan +and placed it on the top of the oven, but away from the fire, cut two +more slices of bread and spread on them all the margarine that was +left; then put them on a plate on the table, covering them with a +saucer to prevent them getting hard and dry during the night. Near the +plate she placed a clean cup and saucer and the milk and sugar. + +In the morning Easton would light the fire and warm up the tea in the +saucepan so as to have a cup of tea before going out. If Ruth was +awake and he was not pressed for time, he generally took a cup of tea +to her in bed. + +Nothing now remained to be done but to put some coal and wood ready in +the fender so that there would be no unnecessary delay in the morning. + +The baby was still sleeping and Ruth did not like to wake him up yet to +dress him for the night. Easton was sitting by the fire smoking, so +everything being done, Ruth sat down at the table and began sewing. +Presently she spoke: + +'I wish you'd let me try to let that back room upstairs: the woman next +door has got hers let unfurnished to an elderly woman and her husband +for two shillings a week. If we could get someone like that it would +be better than having an empty room in the house.' + +'And we'd always have them messing about down here, cooking and washing +and one thing and another,' objected Easton; 'they'd be more trouble +than they way worth.' + +'Well, we might try and furnish it. There's Mrs Crass across the road +has got two lodgers in one room. They pay her twelve shillings a week +each; board, lodging and washing. That's one pound four she has coming +in reglar every week. If we could do the same we'd very soon be out of +debt.' + +'What's the good of talking? You'd never be able to do the work even +if we had the furniture.' + +'Oh, the work's nothing,' replied Ruth, 'and as for the furniture, +we've got plenty of spare bedclothes, and we could easily manage +without a washstand in our room for a bit, so the only thing we really +want is a small bedstead and mattress; we could get them very cheap +second-hand.' + +'There ought to be a chest of drawers,' said Easton doubtfully. + +'I don't think so,' replied Ruth. 'There's a cupboard in the room and +whoever took it would be sure to have a box.' + +'Well, if you think you can do the work I've no objection,' said +Easton. 'It'll be a nuisance having a stranger in the way all the +time, but I suppose we must do something of the sort or else we'll have +to give up the house and take a couple of rooms somewhere. That would +be worse than having lodgers ourselves. + +'Let's go and have a look at the room,' he added, getting up and taking +the lamp from the wall. + +They had to go up two flights of stairs before arriving at the top +landing, where there were two doors, one leading into the front +room--their bedroom--and the other into the empty back room. These two +doors were at right angles to each other. The wallpaper in the back +room was damaged and soiled in several places. + +'There's nearly a whole roll of this paper on the top of the cupboard,' +said Ruth. 'You could easily mend all those places. We could hang up a +few almanacks on the walls; our washstand could go there by the window; +a chair just there, and the bed along that wall behind the door. It's +only a small window, so I could easily manage to make a curtain out of +something. I'm sure I could make the room look quite nice without +spending hardly anything.' + +Easton reached down the roll of paper. It was the same pattern as that +on the wall. The latter was a good deal faded, of course, but it would +not matter much if the patches showed a little. They returned to the +kitchen. + +'Do you think you know anyone who would take it?' asked Ruth. Easton +smoked thoughtfully. + +'No,' he said at length. 'But I'll mention it to one or two of the +chaps on the job; they might know of someone.' + +'And I'll get Mrs Crass to ask her lodgers: p'raps they might have a +friend what would like to live near them.' + +So it was settled; and as the fire was nearly out and it was getting +late, they prepared to retire for the night. The baby was still +sleeping so Easton lifted it, cradle and all, and carried it up the +narrow staircase into the front bedroom, Ruth leading the way, carrying +the lamp and some clothes for the child. So that the infant might be +within easy reach of its mother during the night, two chairs were +arranged close to her side of the bed and the cradle placed on them. + +'Now we've forgot the clock,' said Easton, pausing. He was half +undressed and had already removed his slippers. + +'I'll slip down and get it,' said Ruth. + +'Never mind, I'll go,' said Easton, beginning to put his slippers on +again. + +'No, you get into bed. I've not started undressing yet. I'll get it,' +replied Ruth who was already on her way down. + +'I don't know as it was worth the trouble of going down,' said Ruth +when she returned with the clock. 'It stopped three or four times +today.' + +'Well, I hope it don't stop in the night,' Easton said. 'It would be a +bit of all right not knowing what time it was in the morning. I +suppose the next thing will be that we'll have to buy a new clock.' + +He woke several times during the night and struck a match to see if it +was yet time to get up. At half past two the clock was still going and +he again fell asleep. The next time he work up the ticking had ceased. +He wondered what time it was? It was still very dark, but that was +nothing to go by, because it was always dark at six now. He was wide +awake: it must be nearly time to get up. It would never do to be late; +he might get the sack. + +He got up and dressed himself. Ruth was asleep, so he crept quietly +downstairs, lit the fire and heated the tea. When it was ready he went +softly upstairs again. Ruth was still sleeping, so he decided not to +disturb her. Returning to the kitchen, he poured out and drank a cup +of tea, put on his boots, overcoat and hat and taking his basket went +out of the house. + +The rain was still falling and it was very cold and dark. There was no +one else in the street. Easton shivered as he walked along wondering +what time it could be. He remembered there was a clock over the front +of a jeweller's shop a little way down the main road. When he arrived +at this place he found that the clock being so high up he could not see +the figures on the face distinctly, because it was still very dark. He +stood staring for a few minutes vainly trying to see what time it was +when suddenly the light of a bull's-eye lantern was flashed into his +eyes. + +'You're about very early,' said a voice, the owner of which Easton +could not see. The light blinded him. + +'What time is it?' said Easton. 'I've got to get to work at seven and +our clock stopped during the night.' + +'Where are you working?' + +'At "The Cave" in Elmore Road. You know, near the old toll gate.' + +'What are you doing there and who are you working for?' the policeman +demanded. + +Easton explained. + +'Well,' said the constable, 'it's very strange that you should be +wandering about at this hour. It's only about three-quarters of an +hour's walk from here to Elmore Road. You say you've got to get there +at seven, and it's only a quarter to four now. Where do you live? +What's your name?' Easton gave his name and address and began +repeating the story about the clock having stopped. + +'What you say may be all right or it may not,' interrupted the +policeman. 'I'm not sure but that I ought to take you to the station. +All I know about you is that I find you loitering outside this shop. +What have you got in that basket?' + +'Only my breakfast,' Easton said, opening the basket and displaying its +contents. + +'I'm inclined to believe what you say,' said the policeman, after a +pause. 'But to make quite sure I'll go home with you. It's on my +beat, and I don't want to run you in if you're what you say you are, +but I should advise you to buy a decent clock, or you'll be getting +yourself into trouble.' + +When they arrived at the house Easton opened the door, and after making +some entries in his note-book the officer went away, much to the relief +of Easton, who went upstairs, set the hands of the clock right and +started it going again. He then removed his overcoat and lay down on +the bed in his clothes, covering himself with the quilt. After a while +he fell asleep, and when he awoke the clock was still ticking. + +The time was exactly seven o'clock. + + + +Chapter 4 + +The Placard + + +Frank Owen was the son of a journeyman carpenter who had died of +consumption when the boy was only five years old. After that his +mother earned a scanty living as a needle-woman. When Frank was +thirteen he went to work for a master decorator who was a man of a type +that has now almost disappeared, being not merely an employer but a +craftsman of a high order. + +He was an old man when Frank Owen went to work for him. At one time he +had had a good business in the town, and used to boast that he had +always done good work, had found pleasure in doing it and had been well +paid for it. But of late years the number of his customers had +dwindled considerably, for there had arisen a new generation which +cared nothing about craftsmanship or art, and everything for cheapness +and profit. From this man and by laborious study and practice in his +spare time, aided by a certain measure of natural ability, the boy +acquired a knowledge of decorative painting and design, and graining +and signwriting. + +Frank's mother died when he was twenty-four, and a year afterwards he +married the daughter of a fellow workman. In those days trade was +fairly good and although there was not much demand for the more +artistic kinds of work, still the fact that he was capable of doing +them, if required, made it comparatively easy for him to obtain +employment. Owen and his wife were very happy. They had one child--a +boy--and for some years all went well. But gradually this state of +things altered: broadly speaking, the change came slowly and +imperceptibly, although there were occasional sudden fluctuations. + +Even in summer he could not always find work: and in winter it was +almost impossible to get a job of any sort. At last, about twelve +months before the date that this story opens, he determined to leave +his wife and child at home and go to try his fortune in London. When +he got employment he would send for them. + +It was a vain hope. He found London, if anything, worse than his +native town. Wherever he went he was confronted with the legend: 'No +hands wanted'. He walked the streets day after day; pawned or sold all +his clothes save those he stood in, and stayed in London for six +months, sometimes starving and only occasionally obtaining a few days +or weeks work. + +At the end of that time he was forced to give in. The privations he +had endured, the strain on his mind and the foul atmosphere of the city +combined to defeat him. Symptoms of the disease that had killed his +father began to manifest themselves, and yielding to the repeated +entreaties of his wife he returned to his native town, the shadow of +his former self. + +That was six months ago, and since then he had worked for Rushton & Co. +Occasionally when they had no work in hand, he was 'stood off' until +something came in. + +Ever since his return from London, Owen had been gradually abandoning +himself to hopelessness. Every day he felt that the disease he +suffered from was obtaining a stronger grip on him. The doctor told +him to 'take plenty of nourishing food', and prescribed costly +medicines which Owen had not the money to buy. + +Then there was his wife. Naturally delicate, she needed many things +that he was unable to procure for her. And the boy--what hope was +there for him? Often as Owen moodily thought of their circumstances +and prospects he told himself that it would be far better if they could +all three die now, together. + +He was tired of suffering himself, tired of impotently watching the +sufferings of his wife, and appalled at the thought of what was in +store for the child. + +Of this nature were his reflections as he walked homewards on the +evening of the day when old Linden was dismissed. There was no reason +to believe or hope that the existing state of things would be altered +for a long time to come. + +Thousands of people like himself dragged out a wretched existence on +the very verge of starvation, and for the greater number of people life +was one long struggle against poverty. Yet practically none of these +people knew or even troubled themselves to inquire why they were in +that condition; and for anyone else to try to explain to them was a +ridiculous waste of time, for they did not want to know. + +The remedy was so simple, the evil so great and so glaringly evident +that the only possible explanation of its continued existence was that +the majority of his fellow workers were devoid of the power of +reasoning. If these people were not mentally deficient they would of +their own accord have swept this silly system away long ago. It would +not have been necessary for anyone to teach them that it was wrong. + +Why, even those who were successful or wealthy could not be sure that +they would not eventually die of want. In every workhouse might be +found people who had at one time occupied good positions; and their +downfall was not in every case their own fault. + +No matter how prosperous a man might be, he could not be certain that +his children would never want for bread. There were thousands living +in misery on starvation wages whose parents had been wealthy people. + +As Owen strode rapidly along, his mind filled with these thoughts, he +was almost unconscious of the fact that he was wet through to the skin. +He was without an overcoat, it was pawned in London, and he had not yet +been able to redeem it. His boots were leaky and sodden with mud and +rain. + +He was nearly home now. At the corner of the street in which he lived +there was a newsagent's shop and on a board outside the door was +displayed a placard: + + TERRIBLE DOMESTIC TRAGEDY + DOUBLE MURDER AND SUICIDE + +He went in to buy a copy of the paper. He was a frequent customer +here, and as he entered the shopkeeper greeted him by name. + +'Dreadful weather,' he remarked as he handed Owen the paper. 'It makes +things pretty bad in your line, I suppose?' + +'Yes,' responded Owen, 'there's a lot of men idle, but fortunately I +happen to be working inside.' + +'You're one of the lucky ones, then,' said the other. 'You know, +there'll be a job here for some of 'em as soon as the weather gets a +little better. All the outside of this block is going to be done up. +That's a pretty big job, isn't it?' + +'Yes,' returned Owen. 'Who's going to do it?' + +'Makehaste and Sloggit. You know, they've got a place over at Windley.' + +'Yes, I know the firm,' said Owen, grimly. He had worked for them once +or twice himself. + +'The foreman was in here today,' the shopkeeper went on. 'He said +they're going to make a start Monday morning if it's fine.' + +'Well, I hope it will be,' said Owen, 'because things are very quiet +just now.' + +Wishing the other 'Good night', Owen again proceeded homewards. + +Half-way down the street he paused irresolutely: he was thinking of the +news he had just heard and of Jack Linden. + +As soon as it became generally known that this work was about to be +started there was sure to be a rush for it, and it would be a case of +first come, first served. If he saw Jack tonight the old man might be +in time to secure a job. + +Owen hesitated: he was wet through: it was a long way to Linden's +place, nearly twenty minutes' walk. Still, he would like to let him +know, because unless he was one of the first to apply, Linden would not +stand such a good chance as a younger man. Owen said to himself that +if he walked very fast there was not much risk of catching cold. +Standing about in wet clothes might be dangerous, but so long as one +kept moving it was all right. + +He turned back and set off in the direction of Linden's house: although +he was but a few yards from his own home, he decided not to go in +because his wife would be sure to try to persuade him not to go out +again. + +As he hurried along he presently noticed a small dark object on the +doorstep of an untenanted house. He stopped to examine it more closely +and perceived that it was a small black kitten. The tiny creature came +towards him and began walking about his feet, looking into his face and +crying piteously. He stooped down and stroked it, shuddering as his +hands came in contact with its emaciated body. Its fur was saturated +with rain and every joint of its backbone was distinctly perceptible to +the touch. As he caressed it, the starving creature mewed pathetically. + +Owen decided to take it home to the boy, and as he picked it up and put +it inside his coat the little outcast began to purr. + +This incident served to turn his thoughts into another channel. If, +as so many people pretended to believe, there was an infinitely loving +God, how was it that this helpless creature that He had made was +condemned to suffer? It had never done any harm, and was in no sense +responsible for the fact that it existed. Was God unaware of the +miseries of His creatures? If so, then He was not all-knowing. Was +God aware of their sufferings, but unable to help them? Then He was +not all-powerful. Had He the power but not the will to make His +creatures happy? Then He was not good. No; it was impossible to +believe in the existence of an individual, infinite God.. In fact, no +one did so believe; and least of all those who pretended for various +reasons to be the disciples and followers of Christ. The anti-Christs +who went about singing hymns, making long prayers and crying Lord, +Lord, but never doing the things which He said, who were known by their +words to be unbelievers and infidels, unfaithful to the Master they +pretended to serve, their lives being passed in deliberate and +systematic disregard of His teachings and Commandments. It was not +necessary to call in the evidence of science, or to refer to the +supposed inconsistencies, impossibilities, contradictions and +absurdities contained in the Bible, in order to prove there was no +truth in the Christian religion. All that was necessary was to look at +the conduct of the individuals who were its votaries. + + + +Chapter 5 + +The Clock-case + + +Jack Linden lived in a small cottage in Windley. He had occupied this +house ever since his marriage, over thirty years ago. + +His home and garden were his hobby: he was always doing something; +painting, whitewashing, papering and so forth. The result was that +although the house itself was not of much account he had managed to get +it into very good order, and as a result it was very clean and +comfortable. + +Another result of his industry was that--seeing the improved appearance +of the place--the landlord had on two occasions raised the rent. When +Linden first took the house the rent was six shillings a week. Five +years after, it was raised to seven shillings, and after the lapse of +another five years it had been increased to eight shillings. + +During the thirty years of his tenancy he had paid altogether nearly +six hundred pounds in rent, more than double the amount of the present +value of the house. Jack did not complain of this--in fact he was very +well satisfied. He often said that Mr Sweater was a very good +landlord, because on several occasions when, being out of work, he had +been a few weeks behind with his rent the agent acting for the +benevolent Mr Sweater had allowed Linden to pay off the arrears by +instalments. As old Jack was in the habit of remarking, many a +landlord would have sold up their furniture and turned them into the +street. + +As the reader is already aware, Linden's household consisted of his +wife, his two grandchildren and his daughter-in-law, the widow and +children of his youngest son, a reservist, who died while serving in +the South African War. This man had been a plasterer, and just before +the war he was working for Rushton & Co. + +They had just finished their tea when Owen knocked at their front door. +The young woman went to see who was there. + +'Is Mr Linden in?' + +'Yes. Who is it?' + +'My name's Owen.' + +Old Jack, however, had already recognized Owen's voice, and came to the +door, wondering what he wanted. + +'As I was going home I heard that Makehaste and Sloggit are going to +start a large job on Monday, so I thought I'd run over and let you +know.' + +'Are they?' said Linden. 'I'll go and see them in the morning. But +I'm afraid I won't stand much chance, because a lot of their regular +hands are waiting for a job; but I'll go and see 'em all the same.' + +'Well, you know, it's a big job. All the outside of that block at the +corner of Kerk Street and Lord Street. They're almost sure to want a +few extra hands.' + +'Yes, there's something in that,' said Linden. 'Anyhow, I'm much +obliged to you for letting me know; but come in out of the rain. You +must be wet through.' + +'No; I won't stay,' responded Owen. 'I don't want to stand about any +longer than I can help in these wet clothes.' + +'But it won't take you a minit to drink a cup of tea,' Linden insisted. +'I won't ask you to stop longer than that.' + +Owen entered; the old man closed the door and led the way into the +kitchen. At one side of the fire, Linden's wife, a frail-looking old +lady with white hair, was seated in a large armchair, knitting. Linden +sat down in a similar chair on the other side. The two grandchildren, +a boy and girl about seven and eight years, respectively, were still +seated at the table. + +Standing by the side of the dresser at one end of the room was a +treadle sewing machine, and on one end of the dresser was a a pile of +sewing: ladies' blouses in process of making. This was another +instance of the goodness of Mr Sweater, from whom Linden's +daughter-in-law obtained the work. It was not much, because she was +only able to do it in her spare time, but then, as she often remarked, +every little helped. + +The floor was covered with linoleum: there were a number of framed +pictures on the walls, and on the high mantelshelf were a number of +brightly polished tins and copper utensils. The room had that +indescribably homelike, cosy air that is found only in those houses in +which the inhabitants have dwelt for a very long time. + +The younger woman was already pouring out a cup of tea. + +Old Mrs Linden, who had never seen Owen before, although she had heard +of him, belonged to the Church of England and was intensely religious. +She looked curiously at the Atheist as he entered the room. He had +taken off his hat and she was surprised to find that he was not +repulsive to look at, rather the contrary. But then she remembered +that Satan often appears as an angel of light. Appearances are +deceitful. She wished that John had not asked him into the house and +hoped that no evil consequences would follow. As she looked at him, +she was horrified to perceive a small black head with a pair of +glistening green eyes peeping out of the breast of his coat, and +immediately afterwards the kitten, catching sight of the cups and +saucers on the table, began to mew frantically and scrambled suddenly +out of its shelter, inflicting a severe scratch on Owen's restraining +hands as it jumped to the floor. + +It clambered up the tablecloth and began rushing all over the table, +darting madly from one plate to another, seeking something to eat. + +The children screamed with delight. Their grandmother was filled with +a feeling of superstitious alarm. Linden and the young woman stood +staring with astonishment at the unexpected visitor. + +Before the kitten had time to do any damage, Owen caught hold of it +and, despite its struggles, lifted it off the table. + +'I found it in the street as I was coming along,' he said. 'It seems +to be starving.' + +'Poor little thing. I'll give it something.' exclaimed the young woman. + +She put some milk and bread into a saucer for it and the kitten ate +ravenously, almost upsetting the saucer in its eagerness, much to the +amusement of the two children, who stood by watching it admiringly. + +Their mother now handed Owen a cup of tea. Linden insisted on his +sitting down and then began to talk about Hunter. + +'You know I HAD to spend some time on them doors to make 'em look +anything at all; but it wasn't the time I took, or even the smoking +what made 'im go on like that. He knows very well the time it takes. +The real reason is that he thinks I was gettin' too much money. Work +is done so rough nowadays that chaps like Sawkins is good enough for +most of it. Hunter shoved me off just because I was getting the top +money, and you'll see I won't be the only one.' + +'I'm afraid you're right,' returned Owen. 'Did you see Rushton when +you went for your money?' + +'Yes,' replied Linden. 'I hurried up as fast as I could, but Hunter +was there first. He passed me on his bike before I got half-way, so I +suppose he told his tale before I came. Anyway, when I started to +speak to Mr Rushton he wouldn't listen. Said he couldn't interfere +between Mr Hunter and the men. + +'Ah! They're a bad lot, them two,' said the old woman, shaking her +head sagely. 'But it'll all come 'ome to 'em, you'll see. They'll +never prosper. The Lord will punish them.' + +Owen did not feel very confident of that. Most of the people he knew +who had prospered were very similar in character to the two worthies in +question. However, he did not want to argue with this poor old woman. + +'When Tom was called up to go to the war,' said the young woman, +bitterly, 'Mr Rushton shook hands with him and promised to give him a +job when he came back. But now that poor Tom's gone and they know that +me and the children's got no one to look to but Father, they do THIS.' + +Although at the mention of her dead son's name old Mrs Linden was +evidently distressed, she was still mindful of the Atheist's presence, +and hastened to rebuke her daughter-in-law. + +'You shouldn't say we've got no one to look to, Mary,' she said. 'We're +not as them who are without God and without hope in the world. The Lord +is our shepherd. He careth for the widow and the fatherless.' + +Owen was very doubtful about this also. He had seen so many badly +cared-for children about the streets lately, and what he remembered of +his own sorrowful childhood was all evidence to the contrary. + +An awkward silence succeeded. Owen did not wish to continue this +conversation: he was afraid that he might say something that would hurt +the old woman. Besides, he was anxious to get away; he began to feel +cold in his wet clothes. + +As he put his empty cup on the table he said: + +'Well, I must be going. They'll be thinking I'm lost, at home.' + +The kitten had finished all the bread and milk and was gravely washing +its face with one of its forepaws, to the great admiration of the two +children, who were sitting on the floor beside it. It was an +artful-looking kitten, all black, with a very large head and a very +small body. It reminded Owen of a tadpole. + +'Do you like cats?' he asked, addressing the children. + +'Yes,' said the boy. 'Give it to us, will you, mister?' + +'Oh, do leave it 'ere, mister,' exclaimed the little girl. 'I'll look +after it.' + +'So will I,' said the boy. + +'But haven't you one of your own?' asked Owen. + +'Yes; we've got a big one.' + +'Well, if you have one already and I give you this, then you'd have two +cats, and I'd have none. That wouldn't be fair, would it?' + +'Well, you can 'ave a lend of our cat for a little while if you give us +this kitten,' said the boy, after a moment's thought. + +'Why would you rather have the kitten?' + +'Because it would play: our cat don't want to play, it's too old.' + +'Perhaps you're too rough with it,' returned Owen. + +'No, it ain't that; it's just because it's old.' + +'You know cats is just the same as people,' explained the little girl, +wisely. 'When they're grown up I suppose they've got their troubles to +think about.' + +Owen wondered how long it would be before her troubles commenced. As +he gazed at these two little orphans he thought of his own child, and +of the rough and thorny way they would all three have to travel if they +were so unfortunate as to outlive their childhood. + +'Can we 'ave it, mister?' repeated the boy. + +Owen would have liked to grant the children's request, but he wanted +the kitten himself. Therefore he was relieved when their grandmother +exclaimed: + +'We don't want no more cats 'ere: we've got one already; that's quite +enough.' + +She was not yet quite satisfied in her mind that the creature was not +an incarnation of the Devil, but whether it was or not she did not want +it, or anything else of Owen's, in this house. She wished he would go, +and take his kitten or his familiar or whatever it was, with him. No +good could come of his being there. Was it not written in the Word: +'If any man love not the Lord Jesus Christ, let him be Anathema +Maran-atha.' She did not know exactly what Anathema Maran-atha meant, +but there could be no doubt that it was something very unpleasant. It +was a terrible thing that this blasphemer who--as she had heard--did +not believe there was a Hell and said that the Bible was not the Word +of God, should be here in the house sitting on one of their chairs, +drinking from one of their cups, and talking to their children. + +The children stood by wistfully when Owen put the kitten under his coat +and rose to go away. + +As Linden prepared to accompany him to the front door, Owen, happening +to notice a timepiece standing on a small table in the recess at one +side of the fireplace, exclaimed: + +'That's a very nice clock.' + +'Yes, it's all right, ain't it?' said old Jack, with a touch of pride. +'Poor Tom made that: not the clock itself, but just the case.' + +It was the case that had attracted Owen's attention. It stood about +two feet high and was made of fretwork in the form of an Indian mosque, +with a pointed dome and pinnacles. It was a very beautiful thing and +must have cost many hours of patient labour. + +'Yes,' said the old woman, in a trembling, broken voice, and looking at +Owen with a pathetic expression. 'Months and months he worked at it, +and no one ever guessed who it were for. And then, when my birthday +came round, the very first thing I saw when I woke up in the morning +were the clock standing on a chair by the bed with a card: + + 'To dear mother, from her loving son, Tom. + Wishing her many happy birthdays.' + +'But he never had another birthday himself, because just five months +afterwards he were sent out to Africa, and he'd only been there five +weeks when he died. Five years ago, come the fifteenth of next month.' + +Owen, inwardly regretting that he had unintentionally broached so +painful a subject, tried to think of some suitable reply, but had to +content himself with murmuring some words of admiration of the work. + +As he wished her good night, the old woman, looking at him, could not +help observing that he appeared very frail and ill: his face was very +thin and pale, and his eyes were unnaturally bright. + +Possibly the Lord in His infinite loving kindness and mercy was +chastening this unhappy castaway in order that He might bring him to +Himself. After all, he was not altogether bad: it was certainly very +thoughtful of him to come all this way to let John know about that job. +She observed that he had no overcoat, and the storm was still raging +fiercely outside, furious gusts of wind frequently striking the house +and shaking it to its very foundations. + +The natural kindliness of her character asserted itself; her better +feelings were aroused, triumphing momentarily over the bigotry of her +religious opinions. + +'Why, you ain't got no overcoat!' she exclaimed. 'You'll be soaked +goin' 'ome in this rain.' Then, turning to her husband, she continued: +'There's that old one of yours; you might lend him that; it would be +better than nothing.' + +But Owen would not hear of this: he thought, as he became very +conscious of the clammy feel of his saturated clothing, that he could +not get much wetter than he already was. Linden accompanied him as far +as the front door, and Owen once more set out on his way homeward +through the storm that howled around like a wild beast hungry for its +prey. + + + +Chapter 6 + +It is not My Crime + + +Owen and his family occupied the top floor of a house that had once +been a large private dwelling but which had been transformed into a +series of flats. It was situated in Lord Street, almost in the centre +of the town. + +At one time this had been a most aristocratic locality, but most of the +former residents had migrated to the newer suburb at the west of the +town. Notwithstanding this fact, Lord Street was still a most +respectable neighbourhood, the inhabitants generally being of a very +superior type: shop-walkers, shop assistants, barber's clerks, boarding +house keepers, a coal merchant, and even two retired jerry-builders. + +There were four other flats in the house in which Owen lived. No. 1 +(the basement) was occupied by an estate agent's clerk. No. 2--on a +level with the street--was the habitat of the family of Mr Trafaim, a +cadaverous-looking gentleman who wore a top hat, boasted of his French +descent, and was a shop-walker at Sweater's Emporium. No. 3 was +tenanted by an insurance agent, and in No. 4 dwelt a tallyman's +traveller. + +Lord Street--like most other similar neighbourhoods--supplied a +striking answer to those futile theorists who prate of the equality of +mankind, for the inhabitants instinctively formed themselves into +groups, the more superior types drawing together, separating themselves +from the inferior, and rising naturally to the top, while the others +gathered themselves into distinct classes, grading downwards, or else +isolated themselves altogether; being refused admission to the circles +they desired to enter, and in their turn refusing to associate with +their inferiors. + +The most exclusive set consisted of the families of the coal merchant, +the two retired jerry-builders and Mr Trafaim, whose superiority was +demonstrated by the fact that, to say nothing of his French extraction, +he wore--in addition to the top hat aforesaid--a frock coat and a pair +of lavender trousers every day. The coal merchant and the jerry +builders also wore top hats, lavender trousers and frock coats, but +only on Sundays and other special occasions. The estate agent's clerk +and the insurance agent, though excluded from the higher circle, +belonged to another select coterie from which they excluded in their +turn all persons of inferior rank, such as shop assistants or barbers. + +The only individual who was received with equal cordiality by all +ranks, was the tallyman's traveller. But whatever differences existed +amongst them regarding each other's social standing they were unanimous +on one point at least: they were indignant at Owen's presumption in +coming to live in such a refined locality. + +This low fellow, this common workman, with his paint-bespattered +clothing, his broken boots, and his generally shabby appearance, was a +disgrace to the street; and as for his wife she was not much better, +because although whenever she came out she was always neatly dressed, +yet most of the neighbours knew perfectly well that she had been +wearing the same white straw hat all the time she had been there. In +fact, the only tolerable one of the family was the boy, and they were +forced to admit that he was always very well dressed; so well indeed as +to occasion some surprise, until they found out that all the boy's +clothes were home-made. Then their surprise was changed into a +somewhat grudging admiration of the skill displayed, mingled with +contempt for the poverty which made its exercise necessary. + +The indignation of the neighbours was increased when it became known +that Owen and his wife were not Christians: then indeed everyone agreed +that the landlord ought to be ashamed of himself for letting the top +flat to such people. + +But although the hearts of these disciples of the meek and lowly Jewish +carpenter were filled with uncharitableness, they were powerless to do +much harm. The landlord regarded their opinion with indifference. All +he cared about was the money: although he also was a sincere Christian, +he would not have hesitated to let the top flat to Satan himself, +provided he was certain of receiving the rent regularly. + +The only one upon whom the Christians were able to inflict any +suffering was the child. At first when he used to go out into the +street to play, the other children, acting on their parents' +instructions, refused to associate with him, or taunted him with his +parents' poverty. Occasionally he came home heartbroken and in tears +because he had been excluded from some game. + +At first, sometimes the mothers of some of the better-class children +used to come out with a comical assumption of superiority and dignity +and compel their children to leave off playing with Frankie and some +other poorly dressed children who used to play in that street. These +females were usually overdressed and wore a lot of jewellery. Most of +them fancied they were ladies, and if they had only had the sense to +keep their mouths shut, other people might possibly have shared the +same delusion. + +But this was now a rare occurrence, because the parents of the other +children found it a matter of considerable difficulty to prevent their +youngsters from associating with those of inferior rank, for when left +to themselves the children disregarded all such distinctions. +Frequently in that street was to be seen the appalling spectacle of the +ten-year-old son of the refined and fashionable Trafaim dragging along +a cart constructed of a sugar box and an old pair of perambulator +wheels with no tyres, in which reposed the plebeian Frankie Owen, armed +with a whip, and the dowdy daughter of a barber's clerk: while the +nine-year-old heir of the coal merchant rushed up behind... + +Owen's wife and little son were waiting for him in the living room. +This room was about twelve feet square and the ceiling--which was low +and irregularly shaped, showing in places the formation of the +roof--had been decorated by Owen with painted ornaments. + +There were three or four chairs, and an oblong table, covered with a +clean white tablecloth, set ready for tea. In the recess at the right +of fireplace--an ordinary open grate--were a number of shelves filled +with a miscellaneous collection of books, most of which had been bought +second-hand. + +There were also a number of new books, mostly cheap editions in paper +covers. + +Over the back of a chair at one side of the fire, was hanging an old +suit of Owen's, and some underclothing, which his wife had placed there +to air, knowing that he would be wet through by the time he arrived +home... + +The woman was half-sitting, half lying, on a couch by the other side of +the fire. She was very thin, and her pale face bore the traces of much +physical and mental suffering. She was sewing, a task which her +reclining position rendered somewhat difficult. Although she was +really only twenty-eight years of age, she appeared older. + +The boy, who was sitting on the hearthrug playing with some toys, bore +a strong resemblance to his mother. He also, appeared very fragile and +in his childish face was reproduced much of the delicate prettiness +which she had once possessed. His feminine appearance was increased by +the fact that his yellow hair hung in long curls on his shoulders. The +pride with which his mother regarded this long hair was by no means +shared by Frankie himself, for he was always entreating her to cut it +off. + +Presently the boy stood up and walking gravely over to the window, +looked down into the street, scanning the pavement for as far as he +could see: he had been doing this at intervals for the last hour. + +'I wonder wherever he's got to,' he said, as he returned to the fire. + +'I'm sure I don't know,' returned his mother. 'Perhaps he's had to +work overtime.' + +'You know, I've been thinking lately,' observed Frankie, after a pause, +'that it's a great mistake for Dad to go out working at all. I believe +that's the very reason why we're so poor.' + +'Nearly everyone who works is more or less poor, dear, but if Dad +didn't go out to work we'd be even poorer than we are now. We should +have nothing to eat.' + +'But Dad says that the people who do nothing get lots of everything.' + +'Yes, and it's quite true that most of the people who never do any work +get lots of everything, but where do they get it from? And how do they +get it?' + +'I'm sure I don't know,' replied Frankie, shaking his head in a puzzled +fashion. + +'Supposing Dad didn't go to work, or that he had no work to go to, or +that he was ill and not able to do any work, then we'd have no money to +buy anything. How should we get on then?' + +'I'm sure I don't know,' repeated Frankie, looking round the room in a +thoughtful manner, 'The chairs that's left aren't good enough to sell, +and we can't sell the beds, or your sofa, but you might pawn my velvet +suit.' + +'But even if all the things were good enough to sell, the money we'd +get for them wouldn't last very long, and what should we do then?' + +'Well, I suppose we'd have to go without, that's all, the same as we +did when Dad was in London.' + +'But how do the people who never do any work manage to get lots of +money then?' added Frankie. + +'Oh, there's lots of different ways. For instance, you remember when +Dad was in London, and we had no food in the house, I had to sell the +easy chair.' + +Frankie nodded. 'Yes,' he said, 'I remember you wrote a note and I +took it to the shop, and afterwards old Didlum came up here and bought +it, and then his cart came and a man took it away.' + +'And do you remember how much he gave us for it?' + +'Five shillings,' replied Frankie, promptly. He was well acquainted +with the details of the transaction, having often heard his father and +mother discuss it. + +'And when we saw it in his shop window a little while afterwards, what +price was marked on it?' + +'Fifteen shillings.' + +Well, that's one way of getting money without working. + +Frankie played with his toys in silence for some minutes. At last he +said: + +'What other ways?' + +'Some people who have some money already get more in this way: they +find some people who have no money and say to them, "Come and work for +us." Then the people who have the money pay the workers just enough +wages to keep them alive whilst they are at work. Then, when the +things that the working people have been making are finished, the +workers are sent away, and as they still have no money, they are soon +starving. In the meantime the people who had the money take all the +things that the workers have made and sell them for a great deal more +money than they gave to the workers for making them. That's another +way of getting lots of money without doing any useful work.' + +'But is there no way to get rich without doing such things as that?' + +'It's not possible for anyone to become rich without cheating other +people.' + +'What about our schoolmaster then? He doesn't do any work.' + +'Don't you think it's useful and and also very hard work teaching all +those boys every day? I don't think I should like to have to do it.' + +'Yes, I suppose what he does is some use,' said Frankie thoughtfully. +'And it must be rather hard too, I should think. I've noticed he looks +a bit worried sometimes, and sometimes he gets into a fine old wax when +the boys don't pay proper attention.' + +The child again went over to the window, and pulling back the edge of +the blind looked down the deserted rain washed street. + +'What about the vicar?' he remarked as he returned. + +Although Frankie did not go to church or Sunday School, the day school +that he had attended was that attached to the parish church, and the +vicar was in the habit of looking in occasionally. + +'Ah, he really is one of those who live without doing any necessary +work, and of all the people who do nothing, the vicar is one of the +very worst.' + +Frankie looked up at his mother with some surprise, not because he +entertained any very high opinion of clergymen in general, for, having +been an attentive listener to many conversations between his parents, +he had of course assimilated their opinions as far as his infant +understanding permitted, but because at the school the scholars were +taught to regard the gentleman in question with the most profound +reverence and respect. + +'Why, Mum?' he asked. + +'For this reason, dearie. You know that all the beautiful things which +the people who do nothing have are made by the people who work, don't +you?' + +'Yes.' + +'And you know that those who work have to eat the very worst food, and +wear the very worst clothes, and live in the very worst homes.' + +'Yes,' said Frankie. + +'And sometimes they have nothing to eat at all, and no clothes to wear +except rags, and even no homes to live in.' + +'Yes,' repeated the child. + +'Well, the vicar goes about telling the Idlers that it's quite right +for them to do nothing, and that God meant them to have nearly +everything that is made by those who work. In fact, he tells them that +God made the poor for the use of the rich. Then he goes to the workers +and tells them that God meant them to work very hard and to give all +the good things they make to those who do nothing, and that they should +be very thankful to God and to the idlers for being allowed to have +even the very worst food to eat and the rags, and broken boots to wear. +He also tells them that they mustn't grumble, or be discontented +because they're poor in this world, but that they must wait till +they're dead, and then God will reward them by letting them go to a +place called Heaven.' + +Frankie laughed. + +'And what about the Idlers?' he asked. + +'The vicar says that if they believe everything he tells them and give +him some of the money they make out of the workers, then God will let +them into heaven also.' + +'Well, that's not fair doos, is it, Mum?' said Frankie with some +indignation. + +'It wouldn't be if it were true, but then you see it's not true, it +can't be true.' + +'Why can't it, Mum?' + +'Oh, for many reasons: to begin with, the vicar doesn't believe it +himself: he only pretends to. For instance, he pretends to believe the +Bible, but if we read the Bible we find that Jesus said that God is our +father and that all the people in the world are His children, all +brothers and sisters. But the vicar says that although Jesus said +"brothers and sisters" He really ought to have said "masters and +servants". Again, Jesus said that His disciples should not think of +tomorrow, or save up a lot of money for themselves, but they should be +unselfish and help those who are in need. Jesus said that His +disciples must not think about their own future needs at all, because +God will provide for them if they only do as He commands. But the +vicar says that is all nonsense. + +'Jesus also said that if anyone tried to do His disciples harm, they +must never resist, but forgive those who injured them and pray God to +forgive them also. But the vicar says this is all nonsense too. He +says that the world would never be able to go on if we did as Jesus +taught. The vicar teaches that the way to deal with those that injure +us is to have them put into prison, or--if they belong to some other +country--to take guns and knives and murder them, and burn their +houses. So you see the vicar doesn't really believe or do any of the +things that Jesus said: he only pretends.' + +'But why does he pretend, and go about talking like that, Mum? What +does he do it for?' + +'Because he wishes to live without working himself, dear.' + +'And don't the people know he's only pretending?' + +'Some of them do. Most of the idlers know that what the vicar says is +not true, but they pretend to believe it, and give him money for saying +it, because they want him to go on telling it to the workers so that +they will go on working and keep quiet and be afraid to think for +themselves.' + +'And what about the workers? Do they believe it? + +'Most of them do, because when they were little children like you, +their mothers taught them to believe, without thinking, whatever the +vicar said, and that God made them for the use of the idlers. When +they went to school, they were taught the same thing: and now that +they're grown up they really believe it, and they go to work and give +nearly everything they make to the idlers, and have next to nothing +left for themselves and their children. That's the reason why the +workers' children have very bad clothes to wear and sometimes no food +to eat; and that's how it is that the idlers and their children have +more clothes than they need and more food than they can eat. Some of +them have so much food that they are not able to eat it. They just +waste it or throw it away.' + +'When I'm grown up into a man,' said Frankie, with a flushed face, 'I'm +going to be one of the workers, and when we've made a lot of things, I +shall stand up and tell the others what to do. If any of the idlers +come to take our things away, they'll get something they won't like.' + +In a state of suppressed excitement and scarcely conscious of what he +was doing, the boy began gathering up the toys and throwing them +violently one by one into the box. + +'I'll teach 'em to come taking our things away,' he exclaimed, +relapsing momentarily into his street style of speaking. + +'First of all we'll all stand quietly on one side. Then when the +idlers come in and start touching our things, we'll go up to 'em and +say, "'Ere, watcher doin' of? Just you put it down, will yer?" And if +they don't put it down at once, it'll be the worse for 'em, I can tell +you.' + +All the toys being collected, Frankie picked up the box and placed it +noisily in its accustomed corner of the room. + +'I should think the workers will be jolly glad when they see me coming +to tell them what to do, shouldn't you, Mum?' + +'I don't know dear; you see so many people have tried to tell them, but +they won't listen, they don't want to hear. They think it's quite +right that they should work very hard all their lives, and quite right +that most of the things they help to make should be taken away from +them by the people who do nothing. The workers think that their +children are not as good as the children of the idlers, and they teach +their children that as soon as ever they are old enough they must be +satisfied to work very hard and to have only very bad good and clothes +and homes.' + +'Then I should think the workers ought to be jolly ashamed of +themselves, Mum, don't you?' + +'Well, in one sense they ought, but you must remember that that's what +they've always been taught themselves. First, their mothers and +fathers told them so; then, their schoolteachers told them so; and +then, when they went to church, the vicar and the Sunday School teacher +told them the same thing. So you can't be surprised that they now +really believe that God made them and their children to make things for +the use of the people who do nothing.' + +'But you'd think their own sense would tell them! How can it be right +for the people who do nothing to have the very best and most of +everything thats made, and the very ones who make everything to have +hardly any. Why even I know better than that, and I'm only six and a +half years old.' + +'But then you're different, dearie, you've been taught to think about +it, and Dad and I have explained it to you, often.' + +'Yes, I know,' replied Frankie confidently. 'But even if you'd never +taught me, I'm sure I should have tumbled to it all right by myself; +I'm not such a juggins as you think I am.' + +'So you might, but you wouldn't if you'd been brought up in the same +way as most of the workers. They've been taught that it's very wicked +to use their own judgement, or to think. And their children are being +taught so now. Do you remember what you told me the other day, when +you came home from school, about the Scripture lesson?' + +'About St Thomas?' + +'Yes. What did the teacher say St Thomas was?' + +'She said he was a bad example; and she said I was worse than him +because I asked too many foolish questions. She always gets in a wax +if I talk too much.' + +'Well, why did she call St Thomas a bad example?' + +'Because he wouldn't believe what he was told.' + +'Exactly: well, when you told Dad about it what did he say?' + +'Dad told me that really St Thomas was the only sensible man in the +whole crowd of Apostles. That is,' added Frankie, correcting himself, +'if there ever was such a man at all.' + +'But did Dad say that there never was such a man?' + +'No; he said HE didn't believe there ever was, but he told me to just +listen to what the teacher said about such things, and then to think +about it in my own mind, and wait till I'm grown up and then I can use +my own judgement.' + +'Well, now, that's what YOU were told, but all the other children's +mothers and fathers tell them to believe, without thinking, whatever +the teacher says. So it will be no wonder if those children are not +able to think for themselves when they're grown up, will it?' + +'Don't you think it will be any use, then, for me to tell them what to +do to the Idlers?' asked Frankie, dejectedly. + +'Hark!' said his mother, holding up her finger. + +'Dad!' cried Frankie, rushing to the door and flinging it open. He ran +along the passage and opened the staircase door before Owen reached the +top of the last flight of stairs. + +'Why ever do you come up at such a rate,' reproachfully exclaimed +Owen's wife as he came into the room exhausted from the climb upstairs +and sank panting into the nearest chair. + +'I al-ways-for-get,' he replied, when he had in some degree recovered. +As he lay back in the chair, his face haggard and of a ghastly +whiteness, and with the water dripping from his saturated clothing, +Owen presented a terrible appearance. + +Frankie noticed with childish terror the extreme alarm with which his +mother looked at his father. + +'You're always doing it,' he said with a whimper. 'How many more times +will Mother have to tell you about it before you take any notice?' + +'It's all right, old chap,' said Owen, drawing the child nearer to him +and kissing the curly head. 'Listen, and see if you can guess what +I've got for you under my coat.' + +In the silence the purring of the kitten was distinctly audible. + +'A kitten!' cried the boy, taking it out of its hiding-place. 'All +black, and I believe it's half a Persian. Just the very thing I +wanted.' + +While Frankie amused himself playing with the kitten, which had been +provided with another saucer of bread and milk, Owen went into the +bedroom to put on the dry clothes, and then, those that he had taken +off having been placed with his boots near the fire to dry, he +explained as they were taking tea the reason of his late homecoming. + +'I'm afraid he won't find it very easy to get another job,' he +remarked, referring to Linden. 'Even in the summer nobody will be +inclined to take him on. He's too old.' + +'It's a dreadful prospect for the two children,' answered his wife. + +'Yes,' replied Owen bitterly. 'It's the children who will suffer most. +As for Linden and his wife, although of course one can't help feeling +sorry for them, at the same time there's no getting away from the fact +that they deserve to suffer. All their lives they've been working like +brutes and living in poverty. Although they have done more than their +fair share of the work, they have never enjoyed anything like a fair +share of the things they have helped to produce. And yet, all their +lives they have supported and defended the system that robbed them, and +have resisted and ridiculed every proposal to alter it. It's wrong to +feel sorry for such people; they deserve to suffer.' + +After tea, as he watched his wife clearing away the tea things and +rearranging the drying clothing by the fire, Owen for the first time +noticed that she looked unusually ill. + +'You don't look well tonight, Nora,' he said, crossing over to her and +putting his arm around her. + +'I don't feel well,' she replied, resting her head wearily against his +shoulder. 'I've been very bad all day and I had to lie down nearly all +the afternoon. I don't know how I should have managed to get the tea +ready if it had not been for Frankie.' + +'I set the table for you, didn't I, Mum?' said Frankie with pride; 'and +tidied up the room as well.' + +'Yes, darling, you helped me a lot,' she answered, and Frankie went +over to her and kissed her hand. + +'Well, you'd better go to bed at once,' said Owen. 'I can put Frankie +to bed presently and do whatever else is necessary.' + +'But there are so many things to attend to. I want to see that your +clothes are properly dry and to put something ready for you to take in +the morning before you go out, and then there's your breakfast to pack +up--' + +'I can manage all that.' + +'I didn't want to give way to it like this,' the woman said, 'because I +know you must be tired out yourself, but I really do feel quite done up +now.' + +'Oh, I'm all right,' replied Owen, who was really so fatigued that he +was scarcely able to stand. 'I'll go and draw the blinds down and +light the other lamp; so say good night to Frankie and come at once.' + +'I won't say good night properly, now, Mum,' remarked the boy, 'because +Dad can carry me into your room before he puts me into bed.' + +A little later, as Owen was undressing Frankie, the latter remarked as +he looked affectionately at the kitten, which was sitting on the +hearthrug watching the child's every movement under the impression that +it was part of some game: + +'What name do you think we ought to call it, Dad?' + +'You may give him any name you like,' replied Owen, absently. + +'I know a dog that lives down the road,' said the boy, 'his name is +Major. How would that do? Or we might call him Sergeant.' + +The kitten, observing that he was the subject of their conversation, +purred loudly and winked as if to intimate that he did not care what +rank was conferred upon him so long as the commisariat department was +properly attended to. + +'I don't know, though,' continued Frankie, thoughtfully. 'They're all +right names for dogs, but I think they're too big for a kitten, don't +you, Dad?' + +'Yes, p'raps they are,' said Owen. + +'Most cats are called Tom or Kitty, but I don't want a COMMON name for +him.' + +'Well, can't you call him after someone you know?' + +'I know; I'll call him after a little girl that comes to our school; a +fine name, Maud! That'll be a good one, won't it Dad?' + +'Yes,' said Owen. + +'I say, Dad,' said Frankie, suddenly realizing the awful fact that he +was being put to bed. 'You're forgetting all about my story, and you +promised that you'd have a game of trains with me tonight.' + +'I hadn't forgotten, but I was hoping that you had, because I'm very +tired and it's very late, long past your usual bedtime, you know. You +can take the kitten to bed with you tonight and I'll tell you two +stories tomorrow, because it's Saturday.' + +'All right, then,' said the boy, contentedly; 'and I'll get the railway +station built and I'll have the lines chalked on the floor, and the +signals put up before you come home, so that there'll be no time +wasted. And I'll put one chair at one end of the room and another +chair at the other end, and tie some string across for telegraph wires. +That'll be a very good idea, won't it, Dad?' and Owen agreed. + +'But of course I'll come to meet you just the same as other Saturdays, +because I'm going to buy a ha'porth of milk for the kitten out of my +penny.' + +After the child was in bed, Owen sat alone by the table in the draughty +sitting-room, thinking. Although there was a bright fire, the room was +very cold, being so close to the roof. The wind roared loudly round +the gables, shaking the house in a way that threatened every moment to +hurl it to the ground. The lamp on the table had a green glass +reservoir which was half full of oil. Owen watched this with +unconscious fascination. Every time a gust of wind struck the house +the oil in the lamp was agitated and rippled against the glass like the +waves of a miniature sea. Staring abstractedly at the lamp, he thought +of the future. + +A few years ago the future had seemed a region of wonderful and +mysterious possibilities of good, but tonight the thought brought no +such illusions, for he knew that the story of the future was to be much +the same as the story of the past. + +The story of the past would continue to repeat itself for a few years +longer. He would continue to work and they would all three continue to +do without most of the necessaries of life. When there was no work +they would starve. + +For himself he did not care much because he knew that at the best--or +worst--it would only be a very few years. Even if he were to have +proper food and clothing and be able to take reasonable care of +himself, he could not live much longer; but when that time came, what +was to become of THEM? + +There would be some hope for the boy if he were more robust and if his +character were less gentle and more selfish. Under the present system +it was impossible for anyone to succeed in life without injuring other +people and treating them and making use of them as one would not like +to be treated and made use of oneself. + +In order to succeed in the world it was necessary to be brutal, selfish +and unfeeling: to push others aside and to take advantage of their +misfortunes: to undersell and crush out one's competitors by fair means +or foul: to consider one's own interests first in every case, +absolutely regardless of the wellbeing of others. + +That was the ideal character. Owen knew that Frankie's character did +not come up to this lofty ideal. Then there was Nora, how would she +fare? + +Owen stood up and began walking about the room, oppressed with a kind +of terror. Presently he returned to the fire and began rearranging the +clothes that were drying. He found that the boots, having been placed +too near the fire, had dried too quickly and consequently the sole of +one of them had begun to split away from the upper: he remedied this as +well as he was able and then turned the wetter parts of the clothing to +the fire. Whilst doing this he noticed the newspaper, which he had +forgotten, in the coat pocket. He drew it out with an exclamation of +pleasure. Here was something to distract his thoughts: if not +instructive or comforting, it would at any rate be interesting and even +amusing to read the reports of the self-satisfied, futile talk of the +profound statesmen who with comical gravity presided over the working +of the Great System which their combined wisdom pronounced to be the +best that could possibly be devised. But tonight Owen was not to read +of those things, for as soon as he opened the paper his attention was +riveted by the staring headline of one of the principal columns: + + TERRIBLE DOMESTIC TRAGEDY + Wife And Two Children Killed + Suicide of the Murderer + +It was one of the ordinary poverty crimes. The man had been without +employment for many weeks and they had been living by pawning or +selling their furniture and other possessions. But even this resource +must have failed at last, and when one day the neighbours noticed that +the blinds remained down and that there was a strange silence about the +house, no one coming out or going in, suspicions that something was +wrong were quickly aroused. When the police entered the house, they +found, in one of the upper rooms, the dead bodies of the woman and the +two children, with their throats severed, laid out side by side upon +the bed, which was saturated with their blood. + +There was no bedstead and no furniture in the room except the straw +mattress and the ragged clothes and blankets which formed the bed upon +the floor. + +The man's body was found in the kitchen, lying with outstretched arms +face downwards on the floor, surrounded by the blood that had poured +from the wound in his throat which had evidently been inflicted by the +razor that was grasped in his right hand. + +No particle of food was found in the house, and on a nail in the wall +in the kitchen was hung a piece of blood-smeared paper on which was +written in pencil: + +'This is not my crime, but society's.' + +The report went on to explain that the deed must have been perpetrated +during a fit of temporary insanity brought on by the sufferings the man +had endured. + +'Insanity!' muttered Owen, as he read this glib theory. 'Insanity! It +seems to me that he would have been insane if he had NOT killed them.' + +Surely it was wiser and better and kinder to send them all to sleep, +than to let them continue to suffer. + +At the same time he thought it very strange that the man should have +chosen to do it that way, when there were so many other cleaner, easier +and more painless ways of accomplishing the same object. He wondered +why it was that most of these killings were done in more or less the +same crude, cruel messy way. No; HE would set about it in a different +fashion. He would get some charcoal, then he would paste strips of +paper over the joinings of the door and windows of the room and close +the register of the grate. Then he would kindle the charcoal on a tray +or something in the middle of the room, and then they would all three +just lie down together and sleep; and that would be the end of +everything. There would be no pain, no blood, and no mess. + +Or one could take poison. Of course, there was a certain amount of +difficulty in procuring it, but it would not be impossible to find some +pretext for buying some laudanum: one could buy several small +quantities at different shops until one had sufficient. Then he +remembered that he had read somewhere that vermillion, one of the +colours he frequently had to use in his work, was one of the most +deadly poisons: and there was some other stuff that photographers used, +which was very easy to procure. Of course, one would have to be very +careful about poisons, so as not to select one that would cause a lot +of pain. It would be necessary to find out exactly how the stuff acted +before using it. It would not be very difficult to do so. Then he +remembered that among his books was one that probably contained some +information about this subject. He went over to the book-shelf and +presently found the volume; it was called The Cyclopedia of Practical +Medicine, rather an old book, a little out of date, perhaps, but still +it might contain the information he wanted. Opening it, he turned to +the table of contents. Many different subjects were mentioned there +and presently he found the one he sought: + +Poisons: chemically, physiologically and pathologically considered. + Corrosive Poisons. + Narcotic Poisons. + Slow Poisons. + Consecutive Poisons. + Accumulative Poisons. + +He turned to the chapter indicated and, reading it, he was astonished +to find what a number of poisons there were within easy reach of +whoever wished to make use of them: poisons that could be relied upon +to do their work certainly, quickly and without pain. Why, it was not +even necessary to buy them: one could gather them from the hedges by +the road side and in the fields. + +The more he thought of it the stranger it seemed that such a clumsy +method as a razor should be so popular. Why almost any other way would +be better and easier than that. Strangulation or even hanging, though +the latter method could scarcely be adopted in that house, because +there were no beams or rafters or anything from which it would be +possible to suspend a cord. Still, he could drive some large nails or +hooks into one of the walls. For that matter, there were already some +clothes-hooks on some of the doors. He began to think that this would +be an even more excellent way than poison or charcoal; he could easily +pretend to Frankie that he was going to show him some new kind of play. + +He could arrange the cord on the hook on one of the doors and then +under pretence of play, it would be done. The boy would offer no +resistance, and in a few minutes it would all be over. + +He threw down the book and pressed his hands over his ears: he fancied +he could hear the boy's hands and feet beating against the panels of +the door as he struggled in his death agony. + +Then, as his arms fell nervelessly by his side again, he thought that +he heard Frankie's voice calling. + +'Dad! Dad!' + +Owen hastily opened the door. + +'Are you calling, Frankie?' + +'Yes. I've been calling you quite a long time.' + +'What do you want?' + +'I want you to come here. I want to tell you something.' + +'Well, what is it dear? I thought you were asleep a long time ago,' +said Owen as he came into the room. + +'That's just what I want to speak to you about: the kitten's gone to +sleep all right, but I can't go. I've tried all different ways, +counting and all, but it's no use, so I thought I'd ask you if you'd +mind coming and staying with me, and letting me hold you hand for a +little while and them p'raps I could go.' + +The boy twined his arms round Owen's neck and hugged him very tightly. + +'Oh, Dad, I love you so much!' he said. 'I love you so much, I could +squeeze you to death.' + +'I'm afraid you will, if you squeeze me so tightly as that.' + +The boy laughed softly as he relaxed his hold. 'That WOULD be a funny +way of showing you how much I love you, wouldn't it, Dad? Squeezing +you to death!' + +'Yes, I suppose it would,' replied Owen huskily, as he tucked the +bedclothes round the child's shoulders. 'But don't talk any more, +dear; just hold my hand and try to sleep.' + +'All right,' said Frankie. + +Lying there very quietly, holding his father's hand and occasionally +kissing it, the child presently fell asleep. Then Owen got up very +gently and, having taken the kitten out of the bed again and arranged +the bedclothes, he softly kissed the boy's forehead and returned to the +other room. + +Looking about for a suitable place for the kitten to sleep in, he +noticed Frankie's toy box, and having emptied the toys on to the floor +in a corner of the room, he made a bed in the box with some rags and +placed it on its side on the hearthrug, facing the fire, and with some +difficulty persuaded the kitten to lie in it. Then, having placed the +chairs on which his clothes were drying at a safe distance from the +fire, he went into the bedroom. Nora was still awake. + +'Are you feeling any better, dear?' he said. + +'Yes, I'm ever so much better since I've been in bed, but I can't help +worrying about your clothes. I'm afraid they'll never be dry enough +for you to put on the first thing in the morning. Couldn't you stay at +home till after breakfast, just for once?' + +'No; I mustn't do that. If I did Hunter would probably tell me to stay +away altogether. I believe he would be glad of an excuse to get rid of +another full-price man just now.' + +'But if it's raining like this in the morning, you'll be wet through +before you get there.' + +'It's no good worrying about that dear: besides, I can wear this old +coat that I have on now, over the other.' + +'And if you wrap your old shoes in some paper, and take them with you, +you can take off your wet boots as soon as you get to the place.' + +'Yes, all right,' responded Owen. 'Besides,' he added, reassuringly, +'even if I do get a little wet, we always have a fire there, you know.' + +'Well, I hope the weather will be a little better than this in the +morning,' said Nora. 'Isn't it a dreadful night! I keep feeling +afraid that the house is going to be blown down.' + +Long after Nora was asleep, Owen lay listening to the howling of the +wind and the noise of the rain as it poured heavily on the roof... + + + +Chapter 7 + +The Exterminating Machines + + +'Come on, Saturday!' shouted Philpot, just after seven o'clock one +Monday morning as they were getting ready to commence work. + +It was still dark outside, but the scullery was dimly illuminated by +the flickering light of two candles which Crass had lighted and stuck +on the shelf over the fireplace in order to enable him to see to serve +out the different lots of paints and brushes to the men. + +'Yes, it do seem a 'ell of a long week, don't it?' remarked Harlow as +he hung his overcoat on a nail and proceeded to put on his apron and +blouse. 'I've 'ad bloody near enough of it already.' + +'Wish to Christ it was breakfast-time,' growled the more easily +satisfied Easton. + +Extraordinary as it may appear, none of them took any pride in their +work: they did not 'love' it. They had no conception of that lofty +ideal of 'work for work's sake', which is so popular with the people +who do nothing. On the contrary, when the workers arrived in the +morning they wished it was breakfast-time. When they resumed work +after breakfast they wished it was dinner-time. After dinner they +wished it was one o'clock on Saturday. + +So they went on, day after day, year after year, wishing their time was +over and, without realizing it, really wishing that they were dead. + +How extraordinary this must appear to those idealists who believe in +'work for work's sake', but who themselves do nothing but devour or use +and enjoy or waste the things that are produced by the labour of those +others who are not themselves permitted to enjoy a fair share of the +good things they help to create? + +Crass poured several lots of colour into several pots. + +'Harlow,' he said, 'you and Sawkins, when he comes, can go up and do +the top bedrooms out with this colour. You'll find a couple of candles +up there. It's only goin' to 'ave one coat, so see that you make it +cover all right, and just look after Sawkins a bit so as 'e doesn't +make a bloody mess of it. You do the doors and windows, and let 'im do +the cupboards and skirtings.' + +'That's a bit of all right, I must say,' Harlow said, addressing the +company generally. 'We've got to teach a b--r like 'im so as 'e can do +us out of a job presently by working under price.' + +'Well, I can't 'elp it,' growled Crass. 'You know 'ow it is: 'Unter +sends 'im 'ere to do paintin', and I've got to put 'im on it. There +ain't nothing else for 'im to do.' + +Further discussion on this subject was prevented by Sawkins' arrival, +nearly a quarter of an hour late. + +'Oh, you 'ave come, then,' sneered Crass. 'Thought p'raps you'd gorn +for a 'oliday.' + +Sawkins muttered something about oversleeping himself, and having +hastily put on his apron, he went upstairs with Harlow. + +'Now, let's see,' Crass said, addressing Philpot. 'You and Newman 'ad +better go and make a start on the second floor: this is the colour, and +'ere's a couple of candles. You'd better not both go in one room or +'Unter will growl about it. You take one of the front and let Newman +take one of the back rooms. Take a bit of stoppin' with you: they're +goin' to 'ave two coats, but you'd better putty up the 'oles as well as +you can, this time.' + +'Only two coats!' said Philpot. 'Them rooms will never look nothing +with two coats--a light colour like this.' + +'It's only goin' to get two, anyway,' returned Crass, testily. ''Unter +said so, so you'll 'ave to do the best you can with 'em, and get 'em +smeared over middlin' sudden, too.' + +Crass did not think it necessary to mention that according to the copy +of the specification of the work which he had in his pocket the rooms +in question were supposed to have four coats. + +Crass now turned to Owen. + +'There's that drorin'-room,' he said. 'I don't know what's goin' to be +done with that yet. I don't think they've decided about it. Whatever's +to be done to it will be an extra, because all that's said about it in +the contract is to face it up with putty and give it one coat of white. +So you and Easton 'ad better get on with it.' + +Slyme was busy softening some putty by rubbing and squeezing it between +his hands. + +'I suppose I'd better finish the room I started on on Saturday?' he +asked. + +'All right,' replied Crass. 'Have you got enough colour?' + +'Yes,' said Slyme. + +As he passed through the kitchen on the way to his work, Slyme accosted +Bert, the boy, who was engaged in lighting, with some pieces of wood, a +fire to boil the water to make the tea for breakfast at eight o'clock. + +'There's a bloater I want's cooked,' he said. + +'All right,' replied Bert. 'Put it over there on the dresser along of +Philpot's and mine.' + +Slyme took the bloater from his food basket, but as he was about to put +it in the place indicated, he observed that his was rather a larger one +than either of the other two. This was an important matter. After +they were cooked it would not be easy to say which was which: he might +possibly be given one of the smaller ones instead of his own. He took +out his pocket knife and cut off the tail of the large bloater. + +''Ere it is, then,' he said to Bert. 'I've cut the tail of mine so as +you'll know which it is.' + +It was now about twenty minutes past seven and all the other men having +been started at work, Crass washed his hands under the tap. Then he +went into the kitchen and having rigged up a seat by taking two of the +drawers out of the dresser and placing them on the floor about six feet +apart and laying a plank across, he sat down in front of the fire, +which was now burning brightly under the pail, and, lighting his pipe, +began to smoke. The boy went into the scullery and began washing up +the cups and jars for the men to drink out of. + +Bert was a lean, undersized boy about fifteen years of age and about +four feet nine inches in height. He had light brown hair and hazel +grey eyes, and his clothes were of many colours, being thickly +encrusted with paint, the result of the unskillful manner in which he +did his work, for he had only been at the trade about a year. Some of +the men had nicknamed him 'the walking paint-shop', a title which Bert +accepted good-humouredly. + +This boy was an orphan. His father had been a railway porter who had +worked very laboriously for twelve or fourteen hours every day for many +years, with the usual result, namely, that he and his family lived in a +condition of perpetual poverty. Bert, who was their only child and not +very robust, had early shown a talent for drawing, so when his father +died a little over a year ago, his mother readily assented when the boy +said that he wished to become a decorator. It was a nice light trade, +and she thought that a really good painter, such as she was sure he +would become, was at least always able to earn a good living. +Resolving to give the boy the best possible chance, she decided if +possible to place him at Rushton's, that being one of the leading firms +in the town. At first Mr Rushton demanded ten pounds as a premium, the +boy to be bound for five years, no wages the first year, two shillings +a week the second, and a rise of one shilling every year for the +remainder of the term. Afterwards, as a special favour--a matter of +charity, in fact, as she was a very poor woman--he agreed to accept +five pounds. + +This sum represented the thrifty savings of years, but the poor woman +parted with it willingly in order that the boy should become a skilled +workman. So Bert was apprenticed--bound for five years--to Rushton & +Co. + +For the first few months his life had been spent in the paint-shop at +the yard, a place that was something between a cellar and a stable. +There, surrounded by the poisonous pigments and materials of the trade, +the youthful artisan worked, generally alone, cleaning the dirty +paint-pots brought in by the workmen from finished 'jobs' outside, and +occasionally mixing paint according to the instructions of Mr Hunter, +or one of the sub-foremen. + +Sometimes he was sent out to carry materials to the places where the +men were working--heavy loads of paint or white lead--sometimes pails +of whitewash that his slender arms had been too feeble to carry more +than a few yards at a time. + +Often his fragile, childish figure was seen staggering manfully along, +bending beneath the weight of a pair of steps or a heavy plank. + +He could manage a good many parcels at once: some in each hand and some +tied together with string and slung over his shoulders. Occasionally, +however, there were more than he could carry; then they were put into a +handcart which he pushed or dragged after him to the distant jobs. + +That first winter the boy's days were chiefly spent in the damp, +evil-smelling, stone-flagged paint-shop, without even a fire to warm +the clammy atmosphere. + +But in all this he had seen no hardship. With the unconsciousness of +boyhood, he worked hard and cheerfully. As time went on, the goal of +his childish ambition was reached--he was sent out to work with the +men! And he carried the same spirit with him, always doing his best to +oblige those with whom he was working. + +He tried hard to learn, and to be a good boy, and he succeeded, fairly +well. + +He soon became a favourite with Owen, for whom he conceived a great +respect and affection, for he observed that whenever there was any +special work of any kind to be done it was Owen who did it. On such +occasions, Bert, in his artful, boyish way, would scheme to be sent to +assist Owen, and the latter whenever possible used to ask that the boy +might be allowed to work with him. + +Bert's regard for Owen was equalled in intensity by his dislike of +Crass, who was in the habit of jeering at the boy's aspirations. +'There'll be plenty of time for you to think about doin' fancy work +after you've learnt to do plain painting,' he would say. + +This morning, when he had finished washing up the cups and mugs, Bert +returned with them to the kitchen. + +'Now let's see,' said Crass, thoughtfully, 'You've put the tea in the +pail, I s'pose.' + +'Yes.' + +'And now you want a job, don't you?' + +'Yes,' replied the boy. + +'Well, get a bucket of water and that old brush and a swab, and go and +wash off the old whitewash and colouring orf the pantry ceiling and +walls.' + +'All right,' said Bert. When he got as far as the door leading into +the scullery he looked round and said: + +'I've got to git them three bloaters cooked by breakfast time.' + +'Never mind about that,' said Crass. 'I'll do them.' + +Bert got the pail and the brush, drew some water from the tap, got a +pair of steps and a short plank, one end of which he rested on the +bottom shelf of the pantry and the other on the steps, and proceeded to +carry out Crass's instructions. + +It was very cold and damp and miserable in the pantry, and the candle +only made it seem more so. Bert shivered: he would like to have put +his jacket on, but that was out of the question at a job like this. He +lifted the bucket of water on to one of the shelves and, climbing up on +to the plank, took the brush from the water and soaked about a square +yard of the ceiling; then he began to scrub it with the brush. + +He was not very skilful yet, and as he scrubbed the water ran down over +the stock of the brush, over his hand and down his uplifted arm, +wetting the turned-up sleeves of his shirt. When he had scrubbed it +sufficiently he rinsed it off as well as he could with the brush, and +then, to finish with, he thrust his hand into the pail of water and, +taking out the swab, wrung the water out of it and wiped the part of +the ceiling that he had washed. Then he dropped it back into the pail, +and shook his numbed fingers to restore the circulation. Then he +peeped into the kitchen, where Crass was still seated by the fire, +smoking and toasting one of the bloaters at the end of a pointed stick. +Bert wished he would go upstairs, or anywhere, so that he himself might +go and have a warm at the fire. + +''E might just as well 'ave let me do them bloaters,' he muttered to +himself, regarding Crass malignantly through the crack of the door. +'This is a fine job to give to anybody--a cold mornin' like this.' + +He shifted the pail of water a little further along the shelf and went +on with the work. + +A little later, Crass, still sitting by the fire, heard footsteps +approaching along the passage. He started up guiltily and, thrusting +the hand holding his pipe into his apron pocket, retreated hastily into +the scullery. He thought it might be Hunter, who was in the habit of +turning up at all sorts of unlikely times, but it was only Easton. + +'I've got a bit of bacon I want the young 'un to toast for me,' he said +as Crass came back. + +'You can do it yourself if you like,' replied Crass affably, looking at +his watch. 'It's about ten to eight.' + +Easton had been working for Rushton & Co. for a fortnight, and had been +wise enough to stand Crass a drink on several occasions: he was +consequently in that gentleman's good books for the time being. + +'How are you getting on in there?' Crass asked, alluding to the work +Easton and Owen were doing in the drawing-room. 'You ain't fell out +with your mate yet, I s'pose?' + +'No; 'e ain't got much to say this morning; 'is cough's pretty bad. I +can generally manage to get on orl right with anybody, you know,' +Easton added. + +'Well, so can I as a rule, but I get a bit sick listening to that +bloody fool. Accordin' to 'im, everything's wrong. One day it's +religion, another it's politics, and the next it's something else.' + +'Yes, it is a bit thick; too much of it,' agreed Easton, 'but I don't +take no notice of the bloody fool: that's the best way.' + +'Of course, we know that things is a bit bad just now,' Crass went on, +'but if the likes of 'im could 'ave their own way they'd make 'em a +bloody sight worse.' + +'That's just what I say,' replied Easton. + +'I've got a pill ready for 'im, though, next time 'e start yappin',' +Crass continued as he drew a small piece of printed paper from his +waistcoat pocket. 'Just read that; it's out of the Obscurer.' + +Easton took the newspaper cutting and read it: 'Very good,' he remarked +as he handed it back. + +'Yes, I think that'll about shut 'im up. Did yer notice the other day +when we was talking about poverty and men bein' out of work, 'ow 'e +dodged out of answerin' wot I said about machinery bein' the cause of +it? 'e never answered me! Started talkin' about something else.' + +'Yes, I remember 'e never answered it,' said Easton, who had really no +recollection of the incident at all. + +'I mean to tackle 'im about it at breakfast-time. I don't see why 'e +should be allowed to get out of it like that. There was a bloke down +at the "Cricketers" the other night talkin' about the same thing--a +chap as takes a interest in politics and the like, and 'e said the very +same as me. Why, the number of men what's been throwed out of work by +all this 'ere new-fangled machinery is something chronic!' + +'Of course,' agreed Easton, 'everyone knows it.' + +'You ought to give us a look in at the "Cricketers" some night. There's +a lot of decent chaps comes there.' + +'Yes, I think I will.' + +'What 'ouse do you usually use?' asked Crass after a pause. + +Easton laughed. 'Well, to tell you the truth I've not used anywhere's +lately. Been 'avin too many 'ollerdays.' + +'That do make a bit of difference, don't it?' said Crass. 'But you'll +be all right 'ere, till this job's done. Just watch yerself a bit, and +don't get comin' late in the mornin's. Old Nimrod's dead nuts on that.' + +'I'll see to that all right,' replied Easton. 'I don't believe in +losing time when there IS work to do. It's bad enough when you can't +get it.' + +'You know,' Crass went on, confidentially. 'Between me an' you an' the +gatepost, as the sayin' is, I don't think Mr bloody Owen will be 'ere +much longer. Nimrod 'ates the sight of 'im.' + +Easton had it in his mind to say that Nimrod seemed to hate the sight +of all of them: but he made no remark, and Crass continued: + +''E's 'eard all about the way Owen goes on about politics and religion, +an' one thing an' another, an' about the firm scampin' the work. You +know that sort of talk don't do, does it?' + +'Of course not.' + +''Unter would 'ave got rid of 'im long ago, but it wasn't 'im as took +'im on in the first place. It was Rushton 'imself as give 'im a start. +It seems Owen took a lot of samples of 'is work an' showed 'em to the +Bloke.' + +'Is them the things wot's 'angin' up in the shop-winder?' + +'Yes!' said Crass, contemptuously. 'But 'e's no good on plain work. Of +course 'e does a bit of grainin' an' writin'--after a fashion--when +there's any to do, and that ain't often, but on plain work, why, +Sawkins is as good as 'im for most of it, any day!' + +'Yes, I suppose 'e is,' replied Easton, feeling rather ashamed of +himself for the part he was taking in this conversation. + +Although he had for the moment forgotten the existence of Bert, Crass +had instinctively lowered his voice, but the boy--who had left off +working to warm his hands by putting them into his trousers +pockets--managed, by listening attentively, to hear every word. + +'You know there's plenty of people wouldn't give the firm no more work +if they knowed about it,' Crass continued. 'Just fancy sendin' a b--r +like that to work in a lady's or gentleman's 'ouse--a bloody Atheist!' + +'Yes, it is a bit orf, when you look at it like that.' + +'I know my missis--for one--wouldn't 'ave a feller like that in our +place. We 'ad a lodger once and she found out that 'e was a +freethinker or something, and she cleared 'im out, bloody quick, I can +tell yer!' + +'Oh, by the way,' said Easton, glad of an opportunity to change the +subject, 'you don't happen to know of anyone as wants a room, do you? +We've got one more than we want, so the wife thought that we might as +well let it.' + +Crass thought for a moment. 'Can't say as I do,' he answered, +doubtfully. 'Slyme was talking last week about leaving the place 'e's +lodging at, but I don't know whether 'e's got another place to go to. +You might ask him. I don't know of anyone else.' + +'I'll speak to 'im,' replied Easton. 'What's the time? it must be +nearly on it.' + +'So it is: just on eight,' exclaimed Crass, and drawing his whistle he +blew a shrill blast upon it to apprise the others of the fact. + +'Has anyone seen old Jack Linden since 'e got the push?' inquired +Harlow during breakfast. + +'I seen 'im Saterdy,' said Slyme. + +'Is 'e doin' anything?' + +'I don't know: I didn't 'ave time to speak to 'im.' + +'No, 'e ain't got nothing,' remarked Philpot. 'I seen 'im Saterdy +night, an' 'e told me 'e's been walkin' about ever since.' + +Philpot did not add that he had 'lent' Linden a shilling, which he +never expected to see again. + +''E won't be able to get a job again in a 'urry,' remarked Easton. +''E's too old.' + +'You know, after all, you can't blame Misery for sackin' 'im,' said +Crass after a pause. ''E was too slow for a funeral.' + +'I wonder how much YOU'LL be able to do when you're as old as he is?' +said Owen. + +'P'raps I won't want to do nothing,' replied Crass with a feeble laugh. +'I'm goin' to live on me means.' + +'I should say the best thing old Jack could do would be to go in the +union,' said Harlow. + +'Yes: I reckon that's what'll be the end of it,' said Easton in a +matter-of-fact tone. + +'It's a grand finish, isn't it?' observed Owen. 'After working hard +all one's life to be treated like a criminal at the end.' + +'I don't know what you call bein' treated like criminals,' exclaimed +Crass. 'I reckon they 'as a bloody fine time of it, an' we've got to +find the money.' + +'Oh, for God's sake don't start no more arguments,' cried Harlow, +addressing Owen. 'We 'ad enough of that last week. You can't expect a +boss to employ a man when 'e's too old to work.' + +'Of course not,' said Crass. + +Philpot said--nothing. + +'I don't see no sense in always grumblin',' Crass proceeded. 'These +things can't be altered. You can't expect there can be plenty of work +for everyone with all this 'ere labour-savin' machinery what's been +invented.' + +'Of course,' said Harlow, 'the people what used to be employed on the +work what's now done by machinery, has to find something else to do. +Some of 'em goes to our trade, for instance: the result is there's too +many at it, and there ain't enough work to keep 'em all goin'.' + +'Yes,' cried Crass, eagerly. 'That's just what I say. Machinery is +the real cause of the poverty. That's what I said the other day.' + +'Machinery is undoubtedly the cause of unemployment,' replied Owen, +'but it's not the cause of poverty: that's another matter altogether.' + +The others laughed derisively. + +'Well, it seems to me to amount to the same thing,' said Harlow, and +nearly everyone agreed. + +'It doesn't seem to me to amount to the same thing,' Owen replied. 'In +my opinion, we are all in a state of poverty even when we have +employment--the condition we are reduced to when we're out of work is +more properly described as destitution.' + +'Poverty,' continued Owen after a short silence, 'consists in a +shortage of the necessaries of life. When those things are so scarce +or so dear that people are unable to obtain sufficient of them to +satisfy all their needs, those people are in a condition of poverty. If +you think that the machinery, which makes it possible to produce all +the necessaries of life in abundance, is the cause of the shortage, it +seems to me that there must be something the matter with your minds.' + +'Oh, of course we're all bloody fools except you,' snarled Crass. 'When +they were servin' out the sense, they give you such a 'ell of a lot, +there wasn't none left for nobody else.' + +'If there wasn't something wrong with your minds,' continued Owen, 'you +would be able to see that we might have "Plenty of Work" and yet be in +a state of destitution. The miserable wretches who toil sixteen or +eighteen hours a day--father, mother and even the little +children--making match-boxes, or shirts or blouses, have "plenty of +work", but I for one don't envy them. Perhaps you think that if there +was no machinery and we all had to work thirteen or fourteen hours a +day in order to obtain a bare living, we should not be in a condition +of poverty? Talk about there being something the matter with your +minds! If there were not, you wouldn't talk one day about Tariff Reform +as a remedy for unemployment and then the next day admit that Machinery +is the cause of it! Tariff Reform won't do away with the machinery, +will it?' + +'Tariff Reform is the remedy for bad trade,' returned Crass. + +'In that case Tariff Reform is the remedy for a disease that does not +exist. If you would only take the trouble to investigate for yourself +you would find out that trade was never so good as it is at present: +the output--the quantity of commodities of every kind--produced in and +exported from this country is greater than it has ever been before. +The fortunes amassed in business are larger than ever before: but at +the same time--owing, as you have just admitted--to the continued +introduction and extended use of wages-saving machinery, the number of +human beings being employed is steadily decreasing. I have here,' +continued Owen, taking out his pocket-book, 'some figures which I +copied from the Daily Mail Year Book for 1907, page 33: + +'"It is a very noticeable fact that although the number of factories +and their value have vastly increased in the United Kingdom, there is +an absolute decrease in the number of men and women employed in those +factories between 1895 and 1901. This is doubtless due to the +displacement of hand labour by machinery!" + +'Will Tariff Reform deal with that? Are the good, kind capitalists +going to abandon the use of wages-saving machinery if we tax all +foreign-made goods? Does what you call "Free Trade" help us here? Or +do you think that abolishing the House of Lords, or disestablishing the +Church, will enable the workers who are displaced to obtain employment? +Since it IS true--as you admit--that machinery is the principal cause +of unemployment, what are you going to do about it? What's your remedy?' + +No one answered, because none of them knew of any remedy: and Crass +began to feel sorry that he had re-introduced the subject at all. + +'In the near future,' continued Owen, 'it is probable that horses will +be almost entirely superseded by motor cars and electric trams. As the +services of horses will be no longer required, all but a few of those +animals will be caused to die out: they will no longer be bred to the +same extent as formerly. We can't blame the horses for allowing +themselves to be exterminated. They have not sufficient intelligence +to understand what's being done. Therefore they will submit tamely to +the extinction of the greater number of their kind. + +'As we have seen, a great deal of the work which was formerly done by +human beings is now being done by machinery. This machinery belongs to +a few people: it is worked for the benefit of those few, just the same +as were the human beings it displaced. These Few have no longer any +need of the services of so many human workers, so they propose to +exterminate them! The unnecessary human beings are to be allowed to +starve to death! And they are also to be taught that it is wrong to +marry and breed children, because the Sacred Few do not require so many +people to work for them as before!' + +'Yes, and you'll never be able to prevent it, mate!' shouted Crass. + +'Why can't we?' + +'Because it can't be done!' cried Crass fiercely. 'It's impossible!' + +'You're always sayin' that everything's all wrong,' complained Harlow, +'but why the 'ell don't you tell us 'ow they're goin' to be put right?' + +'It doesn't seem to me as if any of you really wish to know. I believe +that even if it were proved that it could be done, most of you would be +sorry and would do all you could to prevent it.' + +''E don't know 'isself,' sneered Crass. 'Accordin' to 'im, Tariff +Reform ain't no bloody good--Free Trade ain't no bloody good, and +everybody else is wrong! But when you arst 'im what ought to be +done--'e's flummoxed.' + +Crass did not feel very satisfied with the result of this machinery +argument, but he consoled himself with the reflection that he would be +able to flatten out his opponent on another subject. The cutting from +the Obscurer which he had in his pocket would take a bit of answering! +When you have a thing in print--in black and white--why there it is, +and you can't get away from it! If it wasn't right, a paper like that +would never have printed it. However, as it was now nearly half past +eight, he resolved to defer this triumph till another occasion. It was +too good a thing to be disposed of in a hurry. + + + +Chapter 8 + +The Cap on the Stairs + + +After breakfast, when they were working together in the drawing-room, +Easton, desiring to do Owen a good turn, thought he would put him on +his guard, and repeated to him in a whisper the substance of the +conversation he had held with Crass concerning him. + +'Of course, you needn't mention that I told you, Frank,' he said, 'but +I thought I ought to let you know: you can take it from me, Crass ain't +no friend of yours.' + +'I've know that for a long time, mate,' replied Owen. 'Thanks for +telling me, all the same.' + +'The bloody rotter's no friend of mine either, or anyone else's, for +that matter,' Easton continued, 'but of course it doesn't do to fall +out with 'im because you never know what he'd go and say to ol' 'Unter.' + +'Yes, one has to remember that.' + +'Of course we all know what's the matter with 'im as far as YOU'RE +concerned,' Easton went on. 'He don't like 'avin' anyone on the firm +wot knows more about the work than 'e does 'imself--thinks 'e might git +worked out of 'is job.' + +Owen laughed bitterly. + +'He needn't be afraid of ME on THAT account. I wouldn't have his job +if it were offered to me.' + +'But 'e don't think so,' replied Easton, 'and that's why 'e's got 'is +knife into you.' + +'I believe that what he said about Hunter is true enough,' said Owen. +'Every time he comes here he tries to goad me into doing or saying +something that would give him an excuse to tell me to clear out. I +might have done it before now if I had not guessed what he was after, +and been on my guard.' + +Meantime, Crass, in the kitchen, had resumed his seat by the fire with +the purpose of finishing his pipe of tobacco. Presently he took out +his pocket-book and began to write in it with a piece of black-lead +pencil. When the pipe was smoked out he knocked the bowl against the +grate to get rid of the ash, and placed the pipe in his waistcoat +pocket. Then, having torn out the leaf on which he had been writing, +he got up and went into the pantry, where Bert was still struggling +with the old whitewash. + +'Ain't yer nearly finished? I don't want yer to stop in 'ere all day, +yer know.' + +'I ain't got much more to do now,' said the boy. 'Just this bit under +the bottom shelf and then I'm done.' + +'Yes, and a bloody fine mess you've made, what I can see of it!' +growled Crass. 'Look at all this water on the floor!' + +Bert looked guiltily at the floor and turned very red. + +'I'll clean it all up', he stammered. 'As soon as I've got this bit of +wall done, I'll wipe all the mess up with the swab.' + +Crass now took a pot of paint and some brushes and, having put some +more fuel on the fire, began in a leisurely way to paint some of the +woodwork in the kitchen. Presently Bert came in. + +'I've finished there,' he said. + +'About time, too. You'll 'ave to look a bit livelier than you do, you +know, or me and you will fall out.' + +Bert did not answer. + +'Now I've got another job for yer. You're fond of drorin, ain't yer?' +continued Crass in a jeering tone. + +'Yes, a little,' replied the boy, shamefacedly. + +'Well,' said Crass, giving him the leaf he had torn out of the +pocket-book, 'you can go up to the yard and git them things and put 'em +on a truck and dror it up 'ere, and git back as soon as you can. Just +look at the paper and see if you understand it before you go. I don't +want you to make no mistakes.' + +Bert took the paper and with some difficulty read as follows: + + I pare steppes 8 foot + 1/2 gallon Plastor off perish + 1 pale off witewosh + 12 lbs wite led + 1/2 gallon Linsede Hoil + Do. Do. turps + +'I can make it out all right.' + +'You'd better bring the big truck,' said Crass, 'because I want you to +take the venetian blinds with you on it when you take it back tonight. +They've got to be painted at the shop.' + +'All right.' + +When the boy had departed Crass took a stroll through the house to see +how the others were getting on. Then he returned to the kitchen and +proceeded with his work. + +Crass was about thirty-eight years of age, rather above middle height +and rather stout. He had a considerable quantity of curly black hair +and wore a short beard of the same colour. His head was rather large, +but low, and flat on top. When among his cronies he was in the habit +of referring to his obesity as the result of good nature and a +contented mind. Behind his back other people attributed it to beer, +some even going to far as to nickname him the 'tank'. + +There was no work of a noisy kind being done this morning. Both the +carpenters and the bricklayers having been taken away, temporarily, to +another 'job'. At the same time there was not absolute silence: +occasionally Crass could hear the voices of the other workmen as they +spoke to each other, sometimes shouting from one room to another. Now +and then Harlow's voice rang through the house as he sang snatches of +music-hall songs or a verse of a Moody and Sankey hymn, and +occasionally some of the others joined in the chorus or interrupted the +singer with squeals and catcalls. Once or twice Crass was on the point +of telling them to make less row: there would be a fine to do if Nimrod +came and heard them. Just as he had made up his mind to tell them to +stop the noise, it ceased of itself and he heard loud whispers: + +'Look out! Someone's comin'.' + +The house became very quiet. + +Crass put out his pipe and opened the window and the back door to get +rid of the smell of the tobacco smoke. Then he shifted the pair of +steps noisily, and proceeded to work more quickly than before. Most +likely it was old Misery. + +He worked on for some time in silence, but no one came to the kitchen: +whoever it was must have gone upstairs. Crass listened attentively. +Who could it be? He would have liked to go to see whom it was, but at +the same time, if it were Nimrod, Crass wished to be discovered at +work. He therefore waited a little longer and presently he heard the +sound of voices upstairs but was unable to recognize them. He was just +about to go out into the passage to listen, when whoever it was began +coming downstairs. Crass at once resumed his work. The footsteps came +along the passage leading to the kitchen: slow, heavy, ponderous +footsteps, but yet the sound was not such as would be made by a man +heavily shod. It was not Misery, evidently. + +As the footsteps entered the kitchen, Crass looked round and beheld a +very tall, obese figure, with a large, fleshy, coarse-featured, +clean-shaven face, and a great double chin, the complexion being of the +colour and appearance of the fat of uncooked bacon. A very large +fleshy nose and weak-looking pale blue eyes, the slightly inflamed lids +being almost destitute of eye-lashes. He had large fat feet cased in +soft calfskin boots, with drab- spats. His overcoat, heavily +trimmed with sealskin, reached just below the knees, and although the +trousers were very wide they were filled by the fat legs within, the +shape of the calves being distinctly perceptible. Even as the feet +seemed about to burst the uppers of the boots, so the legs appeared to +threaten the trousers with disruption. This man was so large that his +figure completely filled up the doorway, and as he came in he stooped +slightly to avoid damaging the glittering silk hat on his head. One +gloved hand was thrust into the pocket of the overcoat and in the other +he carried a small Gladstone bag. + +When Crass beheld this being, he touched his cap respectfully. + +'Good morning, sir!' + +'Good morning. They told me upstairs that I should find the foreman +here. Are you the foreman?' + +'Yes, sir.' + +'I see you're getting on with the work here.' + +'Ho yes sir, we're beginning to make a bit hov a show now, sir,' +replied Crass, speaking as if he had a hot potato in his mouth. + +'Mr Rushton isn't here yet, I suppose?' + +'No, sir: 'e don't horfun come hon the job hin the mornin, sir; 'e +generally comes hafternoons, sir, but Mr 'Unter's halmost sure to be +'ere presently, sir.' + +'It's Mr Rushton I want to see: I arranged to meet him here at ten +o'clock; but'--looking at his watch--'I'm rather before my time.' + +'He'll be here presently, I suppose,' added Mr Sweater. 'I'll just +take a look round till he comes.' + +'Yes, sir,' responded Crass, walking behind him obsequiously as he went +out of the room. + +Hoping that the gentleman might give him a shilling, Crass followed him +into the front hall and began explaining what progress had so far been +made with the work, but as Mr Sweater answered only by monosyllables +and grunts, Crass presently concluded that his conversation was not +appreciated and returned to the kitchen. + +Meantime, upstairs, Philpot had gone into Newman's room and was +discussing with him the possibility of extracting from Mr Sweater the +price of a little light refreshment. + +'I think,' he remarked, 'that we oughter see-ise this 'ere tuneropperty +to touch 'im for an allowance.' + +'We won't git nothin' out of 'IM, mate,' returned Newman. ''E's a +red-'ot teetotaller.' + +'That don't matter. 'Ow's 'e to know that we buys beer with it? We +might 'ave tea, or ginger ale, or lime-juice and glycerine for all 'e +knows!' + +Mr Sweater now began ponderously re-ascending the stairs and presently +came into the room where Philpot was. The latter greeted him with +respectful cordiality: + +'Good morning, sir.' + +'Good morning. You've begun painting up here, then.' + +'Yes, sir, we've made a start on it,' replied Philpot, affably. + +'Is this door wet?' asked Sweater, glancing apprehensively at the +sleeve of his coat. + +'Yes, sir,' answered Philpot, and added, as he looked meaningly at the +great man, 'the paint is wet, sir, but the PAINTERS is dry.' + +'Confound it!' exclaimed Sweater, ignoring, or not hearing the latter +part of Philpot's reply. 'I've got some of the beastly stuff on my +coat sleeve.' + +'Oh, that's nothing, sir,' cried Philpot, secretly delighted. 'I'll +get that orf for yer in no time. You wait just 'arf a mo!' + +He had a piece of clean rag in his tool bag, and there was a can of +turps in the room. Moistening the rag slightly with turps he carefully +removed the paint from Sweater's sleeve. + +'It's all orf now, sir,' he remarked, as he rubbed the place with a dry +part of the rag. 'The smell of the turps will go away in about a +hour's time.' + +'Thanks,' said Sweater. + +Philpot looked at him wistfully, but Sweater evidently did not +understand, and began looking about the room. + +'I see they've put a new piece of skirting here,' he observed. + +'Yes, sir,' said Newman, who came into the room just then to get the +turps. 'The old piece was all to bits with dry-rot.' + +'I feel as if I 'ad a touch of the dry-rot meself, don't you?' said +Philpot to Newman, who smiled feebly and cast a sidelong glance at +Sweater, who did not appear to notice the significance of the remark, +but walked out of the room and began climbing up to the next floor, +where Harlow and Sawkins were working. + +'Well, there's a bleeder for yer!' said Philpot with indignation. +'After all the trouble I took to clean 'is coat! Not a bloody stiver! +Well, it takes the cake, don't it?' + +'I told you 'ow it would be, didn't I?' replied Newman. + +'P'raps I didn't make it plain enough,' said Philpot, thoughtfully. 'We +must try to get some of our own back somehow, you know.' + +Going out on the landing he called softly upstairs. + +'I say, Harlow.' + +'Hallo,' said that individual, looking over the banisters. + +''Ow are yer getting on up there?' + +'Oh, all right, you know.' + +'Pretty dry job, ain't it?' Philpot continued, raising his voice a +little and winking at Harlow. + +'Yes, it is, rather,' replied Harlow with a grin. + +'I think this would be a very good time to take up the collection, +don't you?' + +'Yes, it wouldn't be a bad idear.' + +'Well, I'll put me cap on the stairs,' said Philpot, suiting the action +to the word. 'You never knows yer luck. Things is gettin' a bit +serious on this floor, you know; my mate's fainted away once already!' + +Philpot now went back to his room to await developments: but as Sweater +made no sign, he returned to the landing and again hailed Harlow. + +'I always reckon a man can work all the better after 'e's 'ad a drink: +you can seem to get over more of it, like.' + +'Oh, that's true enough,' responded Harlow. 'I've often noticed it +meself.' + +Sweater came out of the front bedroom and passed into one of the back +rooms without any notice of either of the men. + +'I'm afraid it's a frost, mate,' Harlow whispered, and Philpot, shaking +his head sadly, returned to work; but in a little while he came out +again and once more accosted Harlow. + +'I knowed a case once,' he said in a melancholy tone, 'where a chap +died--of thirst--on a job just like this; and at the inquest the doctor +said as 'arf a pint would 'a saved 'im!' + +'It must 'ave been a norrible death,' remarked Harlow. + +''Orrible ain't the work for it, mate,' replied Philpot, mournfully. +'It was something chronic!' + +After this final heartrending appeal to Sweater's humanity they +returned to work, satisfied that, whatever the result of their efforts, +they had done their best. They had placed the matter fully and fairly +before him: nothing more could be said: the issue now rested entirely +with him. + +But it was all in vain. Sweater either did not or would not +understand, and when he came downstairs he took no notice whatever of +the cap which Philpot had placed so conspicuously in the centre of the +landing floor. + + + +Chapter 9 + +Who is to Pay? + + +Sweater reached the hall almost at the same moment that Rushton entered +by the front door. They greeted each other in a friendly way and after +a few remarks concerning the work that was being done, they went into +the drawing-room where Owen and Easton were and Rushton said: + +'What about this room? Have you made up your mind what you're going to +have done to it?' + +'Yes,' replied Sweater; 'but I'll tell you about that afterwards. What +I'm anxious about is the drains. Have you brought the plans?' + +'Yes.' + +'What's it going to cost?' + +'Just wait a minute,' said Rushton, with a slight gesture calling +Sweater's attention to the presence of the two workmen. Sweater +understood. + +'You might leave that for a few minutes, will you?' Rushton continued, +addressing Owen and Easton. 'Go and get on with something else for a +little while.' + +When they were alone, Rushton closed the door and remarked: 'It's +always as well not to let these fellows know more than is necessary.' + +Sweater agreed. + +'Now this 'ere drain work is really two separate jobs,' said Rushton. +'First, the drains of the house: that is, the part of the work that' +actually on your ground. When that's done, there will 'ave to be a +pipe carried right along under this private road to the main road to +connect the drains of the house with the town main. You follow me?' + +'Perfectly. What's it going to cost for the lot?' + +'For the drains of the house, L25.0.0. and for the connecting pipe +L30.0.0. L55.0.0. for the lot.' + +'Um! That the lower you can do it for, eh?' + +'That's the lowest. I've figured it out most carefully, the time and +materials, and that's practically all I'm charging you.' + +The truth of the matter was that Rushton had had nothing whatever to do +with estimating the cost of this work: he had not the necessary +knowledge to do so. Hunter had drawn the plans, calculated the cost +and prepared the estimate. + +'I've been thinking over this business lately,' said Sweater, looking +at Rushton with a cunning leer. 'I don't see why I should have to pay +for the connecting pipe. The Corporation ought to pay for that. What +do you say?' + +Rushton laughed. 'I don't see why not,' he replied. + +'I think we could arrange it all right, don't you?' Sweater went on. +'Anyhow, the work will have to be done, so you'd better let 'em get on +with it. L55.0.0. covers both jobs, you say?' + +'Yes.' + +'Oh, all right, you get on with it and we'll see what can be done with +the Corporation later on.' + +'I don't suppose we'll find 'em very difficult to deal with,' said +Rushton with a grin, and Sweater smiled agreement. + +As they were passing through the hall they met Hunter, who had just +arrived. He was rather surprised to see them, as he knew nothing of +their appointment. He wished them 'Good morning' in an awkward +hesitating undertone as if he were doubtful how his greeting would be +received. Sweater nodded slightly, but Rushton ignored him altogether +and Nimrod passed on looking and feeling like a disreputable cur that +had just been kicked. + +As Sweater and Rushton walked together about the house, Hunter hovered +about them at a respectable distance, hoping that presently some notice +might be taken of him. His dismal countenance became even longer than +usual when he observed that they were about to leave the house without +appearing even to know that he was there. However, just as they were +going out, Rushton paused on the threshold and called him: + +'Mr Hunter!' + +'Yes, sir.' + +Nimrod ran to him like a dog taken notice of by his master: if he had +possessed a tail, it is probable that he would have wagged it. Rushton +gave him the plans with an intimation that the work was to be proceeded +with. + +For some time after they were gone, Hunter crawled silently about the +house, in and out of the rooms, up and down the corridors and the +staircases. After a while he went into the room where Newman was and +stood quietly watching him for about ten minutes as he worked. The man +was painting the skirting, and just then he came to a part that was +split in several places, so he took his knife and began to fill the +cracks with putty. He was so nervous under Hunter's scrutiny that his +hand trembled to such an extent that it took him about twice as long as +it should have done, and Hunter told him so with brutal directness. + +'Never mind about puttying up such little cracks as them!' he shouted. +'Fill 'em up with the paint. We can't afford to pay you for messing +about like that!' + +Newman made no reply. + +Misery found no excuse for bullying anyone else, because they were all +tearing into it for all they were worth. As he wandered up and down +the house like an evil spirit, he was followed by the furtively +unfriendly glances of the men, who cursed him in their hearts as he +passed. + +He sneaked into the drawing-room and after standing with a malignant +expression, silently watching Owen and Easton, he came out again +without having uttered a word. + +Although he frequently acted in this manner, yet somehow today the +circumstance worried Owen considerably. He wondered uneasily what it +meant, and began to feel vaguely apprehensive. Hunter's silence seemed +more menacing than his speech. + + + +Chapter 10 + +The Long Hill + + +Bert arrived at the shop and with as little delay as possible loaded up +the handcart with all the things he had been sent for and started on the +return journey. He got on all right in the town, because the roads +were level and smooth, being paved with wood blocks. If it had only +been like that all the way it would have been easy enough, although he +was a small boy for such a large truck, and such a heavy load. While +the wood road lasted the principal trouble he experienced was the +difficulty of seeing where he was going, the handcart being so high and +himself so short. The pair of steps on the cart of course made it all +the worse in that respect. However, by taking great care he managed to +get through the town all right, although he narrowly escaped colliding +with several vehicles, including two or three motor cars and an +electric tram, besides nearly knocking over an old woman who was +carrying a large bundle of washing. From time to time he saw other +small boys of his acquaintance, some of them former schoolmates. Some +of these passed by carrying heavy loads of groceries in baskets, and +others with wooden trays full of joints of meat. + +Unfortunately, the wood paving ceased at the very place where the +ground began to rise. Bert now found himself at the beginning of a +long stretch of macadamized road which rose slightly and persistently +throughout its whole length. Bert had pushed a cart up this road many +times before and consequently knew the best method of tackling it. +Experience had taught him that a full frontal attack on this hill was +liable to failure, so on this occasion he followed his usual plan of +making diagonal movements, crossing the road repeatedly from right to +left and left to right, after the fashion of a sailing ship tacking +against the wind, and halting about every twenty yards to rest and take +breath. The distance he was to go was regulated, not so much by his +powers of endurance as by the various objects by the wayside--the +lamp-posts, for instance. During each rest he used to look ahead and +select a certain lamp-post or street corner as the next stopping-place, +and when he start again he used to make the most strenuous and +desperate efforts to reach it. + +Generally the goal he selected was too distant, for he usually +overestimated his strength, and whenever he was forced to give in he +ran the truck against the kerb and stood there panting for breath and +feeling profoundly disappointed at his failure. + +On the present occasion, during one of these rests, it flashed upon him +that he was being a very long time: he would have to buck up or he +would get into a row: he was not even half-way up the road yet! + +Selecting a distant lamp-post, he determined to reach it before resting +again. + +The cart had a single shaft with a cross-piece at the end, forming the +handle: he gripped this fiercely with both hands and, placing his chest +against it, with a mighty effort he pushed the cart before him. + +It seemed to get heavier and heavier every foot of the way. His whole +body, but especially the thighs and calves of his legs, pained +terribly, but still he strained and struggled and said to himself that +he would not give in until he reached the lamp-post. + +Finding that the handle hurt his chest, he lowered it to his waist, but +that being even more painful he raised it again to his chest, and +struggled savagely on, panting for breath and with his heart beating +wildly. + +The cart became heavier and heavier. After a while it seemed to the +boy as if there were someone at the front of it trying to push him back +down the hill. This was such a funny idea that for a moment he felt +inclined to laugh, but the inclination went almost as soon as it came +and was replaced by the dread that he would not be able to hold out +long enough to reach the lamp-post, after all. Clenching his teeth, he +made a tremendous effort and staggered forward two or three more steps +and then--the cart stopped. He struggled with it despairingly for a +few seconds, but all the strength had suddenly gone out of him: his +legs felt so weak that he nearly collapsed on to the ground, and the +cart began to move backwards down the hill. He was just able to stick +to it and guide it so that it ran into and rested against the kerb, and +then he stood holding it in a half-dazed way, very pale, saturated with +perspiration, and trembling. His legs in particular shook so much that +he felt that unless he could sit down for a little, he would FALL down. + +He lowered the handle very carefully so as not to spill the whitewash +out of the pail which was hanging from a hook under the cart, then, +sitting down on the kerbstone, he leaned wearily against the wheel. + +A little way down the road was a church with a clock in the tower. It +was five minutes to ten by this clock. Bert said to himself that when +it was ten he would make another start. + +Whilst he was resting he thought of many things. Just behind that +church was a field with several ponds in it where he used to go with +other boys to catch effets. If it were not for the cart he would go +across now, to see whether there were any there still. He remembered +that he had been very eager to leave school and go to work, but they +used to be fine old times after all. + +Then he thought of the day when his mother took him to Mr Rushton's +office to 'bind' him. He remembered that day very vividly: it was +almost a year ago. How nervous he had been! His hand had trembled so +that he was scarcely able to hold the pen. And even when it was all +over, they had both felt very miserable, somehow. His mother had been +very nervous in the office also, and when they got home she cried a lot +and called him her poor little fatherless boy, and said she hoped he +would be good and try to learn. And then he cried as well, and +promised her that he would do his best. He reflected with pride that +he was keeping his promise about being a good boy and trying to learn: +in fact, he knew a great deal about the trade already--he could paint +back doors as well as anybody! and railings as well. Owen had taught +him lots of things and had promised to do some patterns of graining for +him so that he might practise copying them at home in the evenings. +Owen was a fine chap. Bert resolved that he would tell him what Crass +had been saying to Easton. Just fancy, the cheek of a rotter like +Crass, trying to get Owen the sack! It would be more like it if Crass +was to be sacked himself, so that Owen could be the foreman. + +One minute to ten. + +With a heavy heart Bert watched the clock. His legs were still aching +very badly. He could not see the hands of the clock moving, but they +were creeping on all the same. Now, the minute hand was over the edge +of the number, and he began to deliberate whether he might not rest for +another five minutes? But he had been such a long time already on his +errand that he dismissed the thought. The minute hand was now upright +and it was time to go on. + +Just as he was about to get up a harsh voice behind him said: + +'How much longer are you going to sit there?' + +Bert started up guiltily, and found himself confronted by Mr Rushton, +who was regarding him with an angry frown, whilst close by towered the +colossal figure of the obese Sweater, the expression on his greasy +countenance betokening the pain he experienced on beholding such as +appalling example of juvenile depravity. + +'What do you mean by sich conduct?' demanded Rushton, indignantly. 'The +idear of sitting there like that when most likely the men are waiting +for them things?' + +Crimson with shame and confusion, the boy made no reply. + +'You've been there a long time,' continued Rushton, 'I've been watchin' +you all the time I've been comin' down the road.' + +Bert tried to speak to explain why he had been resting, but his mouth +and his tongue had become quite parched from terror and he was unable +to articulate a single word. + +'You know, that's not the way to get on in life, my boy,' observed +Sweater lifting his forefinger and shaking his fat head reproachfully. + +'Get along with you at once!' Rushton said, roughly. 'I'm surprised at +yer! The idear! Sitting down in my time!' + +This was quite true. Rushton was not merely angry, but astonished at +the audacity of the boy. That anyone in his employment should dare to +have the impertinence to sit down in his time was incredible. + +The boy lifted the handle of the cart and once more began to push it up +the hill. It seemed heavier now that ever, but he managed to get on +somehow. He kept glancing back after Rushton and Sweater, who +presently turned a corner and were lost to view: then he ran the cart +to the kerb again to have a breathe. He couldn't have kept up much +further without a spell even if they had still been watching him, but +he didn't rest for more than about half a minute this time, because he +was afraid they might be peeping round the corner at him. + +After this he gave up the lamp-post system and halted for a minute or +so at regular short intervals. In this way, he at length reached the +top of the hill, and with a sigh of relief congratulated himself that +the journey was practically over. + +Just before he arrived at the gate of the house, he saw Hunter sneak +out and mount his bicycle and ride away. Bert wheeled his cart up to +the front door and began carrying in the things. Whilst thus engaged +he noticed Philpot peeping cautiously over the banisters of the +staircase, and called out to him: + +'Give us a hand with this bucket of whitewash, will yer, Joe?' + +'Certainly, me son, with the greatest of hagony,' replied Philpot as he +hurried down the stairs. + +As they were carrying it in Philpot winked at Bert and whispered: + +'Did yer see Pontius Pilate anywheres outside?' + +''E went away on 'is bike just as I come in at the gate.' + +'Did 'e? Thank Gord for that! I don't wish 'im no 'arm,' said +Philpot, fervently, 'but I 'opes 'e gets runned over with a motor.' + +In this wish Bert entirely concurred, and similar charitable sentiments +were expressed by all the others as soon as they heard that Misery was +gone. + +Just before four o'clock that afternoon Bert began to load up the truck +with the venetian blinds, which had been taken down some days +previously. + +'I wonder who'll have the job of paintin' 'em?' remarked Philpot to +Newman. + +'P'raps's they'll take a couple of us away from ere.' + +'I shouldn't think so. We're short-'anded 'ere already. Most likely +they'll put on a couple of fresh 'ands. There's a 'ell of a lot of +work in all them blinds, you know: I reckon they'll 'ave to 'ave three +or four coats, the state they're in.' + +'Yes. No doubt that's what will be done,' replied Newman, and added +with a mirthless laugh: + +'I don't suppose they'll have much difficulty in getting a couple of +chaps.' + +'No, you're right, mate. There's plenty of 'em walkin' about as a +week's work would be a Gordsend to.' + +'Come to think of it,' continued Newman after a pause, 'I believe the +firm used to give all their blind work to old Latham, the venetian +blind maker. Prap's they'll give 'im this lot to do.' + +'Very likely,' replied Philpot, 'I should think 'e can do 'em cheaper +even than us chaps, and that's all the firm cares about.' + +How far their conjectures were fulfilled will appear later. + +Shortly after Bert was gone it became so dark that it was necessary to +light the candles, and Philpot remarked that although he hated working +under such conditions, yet he was always glad when lighting up time +came, because then knocking off time was not very far behind. + +About five minutes to five, just as they were all putting their things +away for the night, Nimrod suddenly appeared in the house. He had come +hoping to find some of them ready dressed to go home before the proper +time. Having failed in this laudable enterprise, he stood silently by +himself for some seconds in the drawing-room. This was a spacious and +lofty apartment with a large semicircular bay window. Round the ceiling +was a deep cornice. In the semi-darkness the room appeared to be of +even greater proportions than it really was. After standing thinking +in this room for a little while, Hunter turned and strode out to the +kitchen, where the men were preparing to go home. Owen was taking off +his blouse and apron as the other entered. Hunter addressed him with a +malevolent snarl: + +'You can call at the office tonight as you go home.' + +Owen's heart seemed to stop beating. All the petty annoyances he had +endured from Hunter rushed into his memory, together with what Easton +had told him that morning. He stood, still and speechless, holding his +apron in his hand and staring at the manager. + +'What for?' he ejaculated at length. 'What's the matter?' + +'You'll find out what you're wanted for when you get there,' returned +Hunter as he went out of the room and away from the house. + +When he was gone a dead silence prevailed. The hands ceased their +preparations for departure and looked at each other and at Owen in +astonishment. To stand a man off like that--when the job was not half +finished--and for no apparent reason: and of a Monday, too. It was +unheard of. There was a general chorus of indignation. Harlow and +Philpot especially were very wroth. + +'If it comes to that,' Harlow shouted, 'they've got no bloody right to +do it! We're entitled to an hour's notice.' + +'Of course we are!' cried Philpot, his goggle eyes rolling wildly with +wrath. 'And I should 'ave it too, if it was me. You take my tip, +Frank: CHARGE UP TO SIX O'CLOCK on yer time sheet and get some of your +own back.' + +Everyone joined in the outburst of indignant protest. Everyone, that +is, except Crass and Slyme. But then they were not exactly in the +kitchen: they were out in the scullery putting their things away, and +so it happened that they said nothing, although they exchanged +significant looks. + +Owen had by this time recovered his self-possession. He collected all +his tools and put them with his apron and blouse into his tool-bag with +the purpose of taking them with him that night, but on reflection he +resolved not to do so. After all, it was not absolutely certain that +he was going to be 'stood off': possibly they were going to send him on +some other job. + +They kept all together--some walking on the pavement and some in the +road--until they got down town, and then separated. Crass, Sawkins, +Bundy and Philpot adjourned to the 'Cricketers' for a drink, Newman +went on by himself, Slyme accompanied Easton who had arranged with him +to come that night to see the bedroom, and Owen went in the direction +of the office. + + + +Chapter 11 + +Hands and Brains + + +Rushton & Co.'s premises were situated in one of the principal streets +of Mugsborough and consisted of a double-fronted shop with plate glass +windows. The shop extended right through to the narrow back street +which ran behind it. The front part of the shop was stocked with +wall-hangings, mouldings, stands showing patterns of embossed wall and +ceiling decorations, cases of brushes, tins of varnish and enamel, and +similar things. + +The office was at the rear and was separated from the rest of the shop +by a partition, glazed with muranese obscured glass. This office had +two doors, one in the partition, giving access to the front shop, and +the other by the side of the window and opening on to the back street. +The glass of the lower sash of the back window consisted of one large +pane on which was painted 'Rushton & Co.' in black letters on a white +ground. + +Owen stood outside this window for two or three seconds before +knocking. There was a bright light in the office. Then he knocked at +the door, which was at once opened from the inside by Hunter, and Owen +went in. + +Rushton was seated in an armchair at his desk, smoking a cigar and +reading one of several letters that were lying before him. At the back +was a large unframed photograph of the size known as half-plate of the +interior of some building. At another desk, or rather table, at the +other side of the office, a young woman was sitting writing in a large +ledger. There was a typewriting machine on the table at her side. + +Rushton glanced up carelessly as Owen came in, but took no further +notice of him. + +'Just wait a minute,' Hunter said to Owen, and then, after conversing +in a low tone with Rushton for a few minutes, the foreman put on his +hat and went out of the office through the partition door which led +into the front shop. + +Owen stood waiting for Rushton to speak. He wondered why Hunter had +sneaked off and felt inclined to open the door and call him back. One +thing he was determined about: he meant to have some explanation: he +would not submit tamely to be dismissed without any just reason. + +When he had finished reading the letter, Rushton looked up, and, +leaning comfortably back in his chair, he blew a cloud of smoke from +his cigar, and said in an affable, indulgent tone, such as one might +use to a child: + +'You're a bit of a hartist, ain't yer?' + +Owen was so surprised at this reception that he was for the moment +unable to reply. + +'You know what I mean,' continued Rushton; 'decorating work, something +like them samples of yours what's hanging up there.' + +He noticed the embarrassment of Owen's manner, and was gratified. He +thought the man was confused at being spoken to by such a superior +person as himself. + +Mr Rushton was about thirty-five years of age, with light grey eyes, +fair hair and moustache, and his complexion was a whitey drab. He was +tall--about five feet ten inches--and rather clumsily built; not +corpulent, but fat--in good condition. He appeared to be very well fed +and well cared for generally. His clothes were well made, of good +quality and fitted him perfectly. He was dressed in a grey Norfolk +suit, dark brown boots and knitted woollen stockings reaching to the +knee. + +He was a man who took himself very seriously. There was an air of +pomposity and arrogant importance about him which--considering who and +what he was--would have been entertaining to any observer gifted with a +sense of humour. + +'Yes,' replied Owen at last. 'I can do a little of that sort of work, +although of course I don't profess to be able to do it as well or as +quickly as a man who does nothing else.' + +'Oh, no, of course not, but I think you could manage this all right. +It's that drawing-room at the 'Cave'. Mr Sweater's been speaking to me +about it. It seems that when he was over in Paris some time since he +saw a room that took his fancy. The walls and ceiling was not papered, +but painted: you know what I mean; sort of panelled out, and decorated +with stencils and hand painting. This 'ere's a photer of it: it's done +in a sort of JAPANESE fashion.' + +He handed the photograph to Owen as he spoke. It represented a room, +the walls and ceiling of which were decorated in a Moorish style. + +'At first Mr Sweater thought of getting a firm from London to do it, +but 'e gave up the idear on account of the expense; but if you can do +it so that it doesn't cost too much, I think I can persuade 'im to go +in for it. But if it's goin' to cost a lot it won't come off at all. +'E'll just 'ave a frieze put up and 'ave the room papered in the +ordinary way.' + +This was not true: Rushton said it in case Owen might want to be paid +extra wages while doing the work. The truth was that Sweater was going +to have the room decorated in any case, and intended to get a London +firm to do it. He had consented rather unwillingly to let Rushton & +Co. submit him an estimate, because he thought they would not be able +to do the work satisfactorily. + +Owen examined the photograph closely. + +'Could you do anything like that in that room?' + +'Yes, I think so,' replied Owen. + +'Well, you know, I don't want you to start on the job and not be able +to finish it. Can you do it or not?' + +Rushton felt sure that Owen could do it, and was very desirous that he +should undertake it, but he did not want him to know that. He wished +to convey the impression that he was almost indifferent whether Owen +did the work or not. In fact, he wished to seem to be conferring a +favour upon him by procuring him such a nice job as this. + +'I'll tell you what I CAN do,' Owen replied. 'I can make you a +watercolour sketch--a design--and if you think it good enough, of +course, I can reproduce it on the ceiling and the walls, and I can let +you know, within a little, how long it will take.' + +Rushton appeared to reflect. Owen stood examining the photograph and +began to feel an intense desire to do the work. + +Rushton shook his head dubiously. + +'If I let you spend a lot of time over the sketches and then Mr Sweater +does not approve of your design, where do I come in?' + +'Well, suppose we put it like this: I'll draw the design at home in the +evenings--in my own time. If it's accepted, I'll charge you for the +time I've spent upon it. If it's not suitable, I won't charge the time +at all.' + +Rushton brightened up considerably. 'All right. You can do so,' he +said with an affectation of good nature, 'but you mustn't pile it on +too thick, in any case, you know, because, as I said before, 'e don't +want to spend too much money on it. In fact, if it's going to cost a +great deal 'e simply won't 'ave it done at all.' + +Rushton knew Owen well enough to be sure that no consideration of time +or pains would prevent him from putting the very best that was in him +into this work. He knew that if the man did the room at all there was +no likelihood of his scamping it for the sake of getting it done +quickly; and for that matter Rushton did not wish him to hurry over it. +All that he wanted to do was to impress upon Owen from the very first +that he must not charge too much time. Any profit that it was possible +to make out of the work, Rushton meant to secure for himself. He was a +smart man, this Rushton, he possessed the ideal character: the kind of +character that is necessary for any man who wishes to succeed in +business--to get on in life. In other words, his disposition was very +similar to that of a pig--he was intensely selfish. + +No one had any right to condemn him for this, because all who live +under the present system practise selfishness, more or less. We must +be selfish: the System demands it. We must be selfish or we shall be +hungry and ragged and finally die in the gutter. The more selfish we +are the better off we shall be. In the 'Battle of Life' only the +selfish and cunning are able to survive: all others are beaten down and +trampled under foot. No one can justly be blamed for acting +selfishly--it is a matter of self-preservation--we must either injure +or be injured. It is the system that deserves to be blamed. What those +who wish to perpetuate the system deserve is another question. + +'When do you think you'll have the drawings ready?' inquired Rushton. +'Can you get them done tonight?' + +'I'm afraid not,' replied Owen, feeling inclined to laugh at the +absurdity of the question. 'It will need a little thinking about.' + +'When can you have them ready then? This is Monday. Wednesday +morning?' + +Owen hesitated. + +'We don't want to keep 'im waiting too long, you know, or 'e may give +up the idear altogether.' + +'Well, say Friday morning, then,' said Owen, resolving that he would +stay up all night if necessary to get it done. + +Rushton shook his head. + +'Can't you get it done before that? I'm afraid that if we keeps 'im +waiting all that time we may lose the job altogether.' + +'I can't get them done any quicker in my spare time,' returned Owen, +flushing. 'If you like to let me stay home tomorrow and charge the +time the same as if I had gone to work at the house, I could go to my +ordinary work on Wednesday and let you have the drawings on Thursday +morning.' + +'Oh, all right,' said Rushton as he returned to the perusal of his +letters. + +That night, long after his wife and Frankie were asleep, Owen worked in +the sitting-room, searching through old numbers of the Decorators' +Journal and through the illustrations in other books of designs for +examples of Moorish work, and making rough sketches in pencil. + +He did not attempt to finish anything yet: it was necessary to think +first; but he roughed out the general plan, and when at last he did go +to bed he could not sleep for a long time. He almost fancied he was in +the drawing-room at the 'Cave'. First of all it would be necessary to +take down the ugly plaster centre flower with its crevices all filled +up with old whitewash. The cornice was all right; it was fortunately a +very simple one, with a deep cove and without many enrichments. Then, +when the walls and the ceiling had been properly prepared, the +ornamentation would be proceeded with. The walls, divided into panels +and arches containing painted designs and lattice-work; the panels of +the door decorated in a similar manner. The mouldings of the door and +window frames picked out with colours and gold so as to be in character +with the other work; the cove of the cornice, a dull yellow with a bold +ornament in colour--gold was not advisable in the hollow because of the +unequal distribution of the light, but some of the smaller mouldings of +the cornice should be gold. On the ceiling there would be one large +panel covered with an appropriate design in gold and colours and +surrounded by a wide margin or border. To separate this margin from +the centre panel there would be a narrow border, and another +border--but wider--round the outer edge of the margin, where the +ceiling met the cornice. Both these borders and the margin would be +covered with ornamentation in colour and gold. Great care would be +necessary when deciding what parts were to be gilded because--whilst +large masses of gilding are apt to look garish and in bad taste--a lot +of fine gold lines are ineffective, especially on a flat surface, where +they do not always catch the light. Process by process he traced the +work, and saw it advancing stage by stage until, finally, the large +apartment was transformed and glorified. And then in the midst of the +pleasure he experienced in the planning of the work there came the fear +that perhaps they would not have it done at all. + +The question, what personal advantage would he gain never once occurred +to Owen. He simply wanted to do the work; and he was so fully occupied +with thinking and planning how it was to be done that the question of +profit was crowded out. + +But although this question of what profit could be made out of the work +never occurred to Owen, it would in due course by fully considered by +Mr Rushton. In fact, it was the only thing about the work that Mr +Rushton would think of at all: how much money could be made out of it. +This is what is meant by the oft-quoted saying, 'The men work with +their hands--the master works with his brains.' + + + +Chapter 12 + +The Letting of the Room + + +It will be remembered that when the men separated, Owen going to the +office to see Rushton, and the others on their several ways, Easton and +Slyme went together. + +During the day Easton had found an opportunity of speaking to him about +the bedroom. Slyme was about to leave the place where he was at +present lodging, and he told Easton that although he had almost decided +on another place he would take a look at the room. At Easton's +suggestion they arranged that Slyme was to accompany him home that +night. As the former remarked, Slyme could come to see the place, and +if he didn't like it as well as the other he was thinking of taking, +there was no harm done. + +Ruth had contrived to furnish the room. Some of the things she had +obtained on credit from a second-hand furniture dealer. Exactly how +she had managed, Easton did not know, but it was done. + +'This is the house,' said Easton. As they passed through, the gate +creaked loudly on its hinges and then closed of itself rather noisily. + +Ruth had just been putting the child to sleep and she stood up as they +came in, hastily fastening the bodice of her dress as she did so. + +'I've brought a gentleman to see you,' said Easton. + +Although she knew that he was looking out for someone for the room, +Ruth had not expected him to bring anyone home in this sudden manner, +and she could not help wishing that he had told her beforehand of his +intention. It being Monday, she had been very busy all day and she was +conscious that she was rather untidy in her appearance. Her long brown +hair was twisted loosely into a coil behind her head. She blushed in +an embarrassed way as the young man stared at her. + +Easton introduced Slyme by name and they shook hands; and then at +Ruth's suggestion Easton took a light to show him the room, and while +they were gone Ruth hurriedly tidied her hair and dress. + +When they came down again Slyme said he thought the room would suit him +very well. What were the terms? + +Did he wish to take the room only--just to lodge? inquired Ruth, or +would he prefer to board as well? + +Slyme intimated that he desired the latter arrangement. + +In that case she thought twelve shillings a week would be fair. She +believed that was about the usual amount. Of course that would include +washing, and if his clothes needed a little mending she would do it for +him. + +Slyme expressed himself satisfied with these terms, which were as Ruth +had said--about the usual ones. He would take the room, but he was not +leaving his present lodgings until Saturday. It was therefore agreed +that he was to bring his box on Saturday evening. + +When he had gone, Easton and Ruth stood looking at each other in +silence. Ever since this plan of letting the room first occurred to +them they had been very anxious to accomplish it; and yet, now that it +was done, they felt dissatisfied and unhappy, as if they had suddenly +experienced some irreparable misfortune. In that moment they +remembered nothing of the darker side of their life together. The hard +times and the privations were far off and seemed insignificant beside +the fact that this stranger was for the future to share their home. To +Ruth especially it seemed that the happiness of the past twelve months +had suddenly come to an end. She shrank with involuntary aversion and +apprehension from the picture that rose before her of the future in +which this intruder appeared the most prominent figure, dominating +everything and interfering with every detail of their home life. Of +course they had known all this before, but somehow it had never seemed +so objectionable as it did now, and as Easton thought of it he was +filled an unreasonable resentment against Slyme, as if the latter had +forced himself upon them against their will. + +'Damn him!' he thought. 'I wish I'd never brought him here at all!' + +Ruth did not appear to him to be very happy about it either. + +'Well?' he said at last. 'What do you think of him?' + +'Oh, he'll be all right, I suppose.' + +'For my part, I wish he wasn't coming,' Easton continued. + +'That's just what I was thinking,' replied Ruth dejectedly. 'I don't +like him at all. I seemed to turn against him directly he came in the +door.' + +'I've a good mind to back out of it, somehow, tomorrow,' exclaimed +Easton after another silence. 'I could tell him we've unexpectedly got +some friends coming to stay with us.' + +'Yes,' said Ruth eagerly. 'It would be easy enough to make some excuse +or other.' + +As this way of escape presented itself she felt as if a weight had been +lifted from her mind, but almost in the same instant she remembered the +reasons which had at first led them to think of letting the room, and +she added, disconsolately: + +'It's foolish for us to go on like this, dear. We must let the room +and it might just as well be him as anyone else. We must make the best +of it, that's all.' + +Easton stood with his back to the fire, staring gloomily at her. + +'Yes, I suppose that's the right way to look at it,' he replied at +length. 'If we can't stand it, we'll give up the house and take a +couple of rooms, or a small flat--if we can get one.' + +Ruth agreed, although neither alternative was very inviting. The +unwelcome alteration in their circumstances was after all not +altogether without its compensations, because from the moment of +arriving at this decision their love for each other seemed to be +renewed and intensified. They remembered with acute regret that +hitherto they had not always fully appreciated the happiness of that +exclusive companionship of which there now remained to them but one +week more. For once the present was esteemed at its proper value, +being invested with some of the glamour which almost always envelops +the past. + + + +Chapter 13 + +Penal Servitude and Death + + +On Tuesday--the day after his interview with Rushton--Owen remained at +home working at the drawings. He did not get them finished, but they +were so far advanced that he thought he would be able to complete them +after tea on Wednesday evening. He did not go to work until after +breakfast on Wednesday and his continued absence served to confirm the +opinion of the other workmen that he had been discharged. This belief +was further strengthened by the fact that a new hand had been sent to +the house by Hunter, who came himself also at about a quarter past +seven and very nearly caught Philpot in the act of smoking. + +During breakfast, Philpot, addressing Crass and referring to Hunter, +inquired anxiously: + +''Ow's 'is temper this mornin', Bob?' + +'As mild as milk,' replied Crass. 'You'd think butter wouldn't melt in +'is mouth.' + +'Seemed quite pleased with 'isself, didn't 'e?' said Harlow. + +'Yes,' remarked Newman. ''E said good morning to me!' + +'So 'e did to me!' said Easton. ''E come inter the drorin'-room an' 'e +ses, "Oh, you're in 'ere are yer, Easton," 'e ses--just like that, +quite affable like. So I ses, "Yes, sir." "Well," 'e ses, "get it +slobbered over as quick as you can," 'e ses, "'cos we ain't got much +for this job: don't spend a lot of time puttying up. Just smear it +over an' let it go!"' + +''E certinly seemed very pleased about something,' said Harlow. 'I +thought prap's there was a undertaking job in: one o' them generally +puts 'im in a good humour.' + +'I believe that nothing would please 'im so much as to see a epidemic +break out,' remarked Philpot. 'Small-pox, Hinfluenza, Cholery morbus, +or anything like that.' + +'Yes: don't you remember 'ow good-tempered 'e was last summer when +there was such a lot of Scarlet Fever about?' observed Harlow. + +'Yes,' said Crass with a chuckle. 'I recollect we 'ad six children's +funerals to do in one week. Ole Misery was as pleased as Punch, +because of course as a rule there ain't many boxin'-up jobs in the +summer. It's in winter as hundertakers reaps their 'arvest.' + +'We ain't 'ad very many this winter, though, so far,' said Harlow. + +'Not so many as usual,' admitted Crass, 'but still, we can't grumble: +we've 'ad one nearly every week since the beginning of October. That's +not so bad, you know.' + +Crass took a lively interest in the undertaking department of Rushton & +Co.'s business. He always had the job of polishing or varnishing the +coffin and assisting to take it home and to 'lift in' the corpse, +besides acting as one of the bearers at the funeral. This work was +more highly paid for than painting. + +'But I don't think there's no funeral job in,' added Crass after a +pause. 'I think it's because 'e's glad to see the end of Owen, if yeh +ask me.' + +'Praps that 'as got something to do with it,' said Harlow. 'But all +the same I don't call that a proper way to treat anyone--givin' a man +the push in that way just because 'e 'appened to 'ave a spite against +'im.' + +'It's wot I call a bl--dy shame!' cried Philpot. 'Owen's a chap wots +always ready to do a good turn to anybody, and 'e knows 'is work, +although 'e is a bit of a nuisance sometimes, I must admit, when 'e +gets on about Socialism.' + +'I suppose Misery didn't say nothin' about 'im this mornin'?' inquired +Easton. + +'No,' replied Crass, and added: 'I only 'ope Owen don't think as I +never said anything against 'im. 'E looked at me very funny that night +after Nimrod went away. Owen needn't think nothing like that about ME, +because I'm a chap like this--if I couldn't do nobody no good, I +wouldn't never do 'em no 'arm!' + +At this some of the others furtively exchanged significant glances, and +Harlow began to smile, but no one said anything. + +Philpot, noticing that the newcomer had not helped himself to any tea, +called Bert's attention to the fact and the boy filled Owen's cup and +passed it over to the new hand. + +Their conjectures regarding the cause of Hunter's good humour were all +wrong. As the reader knows, Owen had not been discharged at all, and +there was nobody dead. The real reason was that, having decided to +take on another man, Hunter had experienced no difficulty in getting +one at the same reduced rate as that which Newman was working for, +there being such numbers of men out of employment. Hitherto the usual +rate of pay in Mugsborough had been sevenpence an hour for skilled +painters. The reader will remember that Newman consented to accept a +job at sixpence halfpenny. So far none of the other workmen knew that +Newman was working under price: he had told no one, not feeling sure +whether he was the only one or not. The man whom Hunter had taken on +that morning also decided in his mind that he would keep his own +counsel concerning what pay he was to receive, until he found out what +the others were getting. + +Just before half past eight Owen arrived and was immediately assailed +with questions as to what had transpired at the office. Crass listened +with ill-concealed chagrin to Owen's account, but most of the others +were genuinely pleased. + +'But what a way to speak to anybody!' observed Harlow, referring to +Hunter's manner on the previous Monday night. + +'You know, I reckon if ole Misery 'ad four legs, 'e'd make a very good +pig,' said Philpot, solemnly, 'and you can't expect nothin' from a pig +but a grunt.' + +During the morning, as Easton and Owen were working together in the +drawing-room, the former remarked: + +'Did I tell you I had a room I wanted to let, Frank?' + +'Yes, I think you did.' + +'Well, I've let it to Slyme. I think he seems a very decent sort of +chap, don't you?' + +'Yes, I suppose he is,' replied Owen, hesitatingly. 'I know nothing +against him.' + +'Of course, we'd rather 'ave the 'ouse to ourselves if we could afford +it, but work is so scarce lately. I've been figuring out exactly what +my money has averaged for the last twelve months and how much a week do +you think it comes to?' + +'God only knows,' said Owen. 'How much?' + +'About eighteen bob.' + +'So you see we had to do something,' continued Easton; 'and I reckon +we're lucky to get a respectable sort of chap like Slyme, religious and +teetotal and all that, you know. Don't you think so?' + +'Yes, I suppose you are,' said Owen, who, although he intensely +disliked Slyme, knew nothing definite against him. + +They worked in silence for some time, and then Owen said: + +'At the present time there are thousands of people so badly off that, +compared with them, WE are RICH. Their sufferings are so great that +compared with them, we may be said to be living in luxury. You know +that, don't you?' + +'Yes, that's true enough, mate. We really ought to be very thankful: +we ought to consider ourselves lucky to 'ave a inside job like this +when there's such a lot of chaps walkin' about doin' nothing.' + +'Yes,' said Owen: 'we're lucky! Although we're in a condition of +abject, miserable poverty we must consider ourselves lucky that we're +not actually starving.' + +Owen was painting the door; Easton was doing the skirting. This work +caused no noise, so they were able to converse without difficulty. + +'Do you think it's right for us to tamely make up our minds to live for +the rest of our lives under such conditions as that?' + +'No; certainly not,' replied Easton; 'but things are sure to get better +presently. Trade hasn't always been as bad as it is now. Why, you can +remember as well as I can a few years ago there was so much work that +we was putting in fourteen and sixteen hours a day. I used to be so +done up by the end of the week that I used to stay in bed nearly all +day on Sunday.' + +'But don't you think it's worth while trying to find out whether it's +possible to so arrange things that we may be able to live like +civilized human beings without being alternately worked to death or +starved?' + +'I don't see how we're goin' to alter things,' answered Easton. 'At +the present time, from what I hear, work is scarce everywhere. WE +can't MAKE work, can we?' + +'Do you think, then, that the affairs of the world are something like +the wind or the weather--altogether beyond our control? And that if +they're bad we can do nothing but just sit down and wait for them to +get better?' + +'Well, I don't see 'ow we can odds it. If the people wot's got the +money won't spend it, the likes of me and you can't make 'em, can we?' + +Owen looked curiously at Easton. + +'I suppose you're about twenty-six now,' he said. 'That means that you +have about another thirty years to live. Of course, if you had proper +food and clothes and hadn't to work more than a reasonable number of +hours every day, there is no natural reason why you should not live for +another fifty or sixty years: but we'll say thirty. Do you mean to say +that you are able to contemplate with indifference the prospect of +living for another thirty years under such conditions as those we +endure at present?' + +Easton made no reply. + +'If you were to commit some serious breach of the law, and were +sentenced next week to ten years' penal servitude, you'd probably think +your fate a very pitiable one: yet you appear to submit quite +cheerfully to this other sentence, which is--that you shall die a +premature death after you have done another thirty years' hard labour.' + +Easton continued painting the skirting. + +'When there's no work,' Owen went on, taking another dip of paint as he +spoke and starting on one of the lower panels of the door, 'when +there's no work, you will either starve or get into debt. When--as at +present--there is a little work, you will live in a state of +semi-starvation. When times are what you call "good", you will work +for twelve or fourteen hours a day and--if you're VERY +lucky--occasionally all night. The extra money you then earn will go +to pay your debts so that you may be able to get credit again when +there's no work.' + +Easton put some putty in a crack in the skirting. + +'In consequence of living in this manner, you will die at least twenty +years sooner than is natural, or, should you have an unusually strong +constitution and live after you cease to be able to work, you will be +put into a kind of jail and treated like a criminal for the remainder +of your life.' + +Having faced up the cracks, Easton resumed the painting of the skirting. + +'If it were proposed to make a law that all working men and women were +to be put to death--smothered, or hung, or poisoned, or put into a +lethal chamber--as soon as they reached the age of fifty years, there +is not the slightest doubt that you would join in the uproar of protest +that would ensue. Yet you submit tamely to have your life shortened by +slow starvation, overwork, lack of proper boots and clothing, and +though having often to turn out and go to work when you are so ill that +you ought to be in bed receiving medical care.' + +Easton made no reply: he knew that all this was true, but he was not +without a large share of the false pride which prompts us to hide our +poverty and to pretend that we are much better off than we really are. +He was at that moment wearing the pair of second-hand boots that Ruth +had bought for him, but he had told Harlow--who had passed some remark +about them--that he had had them for years, wearing them only for best. +He felt very resentful as he listened to the other's talk, and Owen +perceived it, but nevertheless he continued: + +'Unless the present system is altered, that is all we have to look +forward to; and yet you're one of the upholders of the present +system--you help to perpetuate it!' + +''Ow do I help to perpetuate it?' demanded Easton. + +'By not trying to find out how to end it--by not helping those who are +trying to bring a better state of things into existence. Even if you +are indifferent to your own fate--as you seem to be--you have no right +to be indifferent to that of the child for whose existence in this +world you are responsible. Every man who is not helping to bring about +a better state of affairs for the future is helping to perpetuate the +present misery, and is therefore the enemy of his own children. There +is no such thing as being neutral: we must either help or hinder.' + +As Owen opened the door to paint its edge, Bert came along the passage. + +'Look out!' he cried, 'Misery's comin' up the road. 'E'll be 'ere in a +minit.' + +It was not often that Easton was glad to hear of the approach of +Nimrod, but on this occasion he heard Bert's message with a sigh of +relief. + +'I say,' added the boy in a whisper to Owen, 'if it comes orf--I mean +if you gets the job to do this room--will you ask to 'ave me along of +you?' + +'Yes, all right, sonny,' replied Owen, and Bert went off to warn the +others. + +'Unaware that he had been observed, Nimrod sneaked stealthily into the +house and began softly crawling about from room to room, peeping around +corners and squinting through the cracks of doors, and looking through +keyholes. He was almost pleased to see that everybody was very hard at +work, but on going into Newman's room Misery was not satisfied with the +progress made since his last visit. The fact was that Newman had been +forgetting himself again this morning. He had been taking a little +pains with the work, doing it something like properly, instead of +scamping and rushing it in the usual way. The result was that he had +not done enough. + +'You know, Newman, this kind of thing won't do!' Nimrod howled. 'You +must get over a bit more than this or you won't suit me! If you can't +move yourself a bit quicker I shall 'ave to get someone else. You've +been in this room since seven o'clock this morning and it's dam near +time you was out of it!' + +Newman muttered something about being nearly finished now, and Hunter +ascended to the next landing--the attics, where the cheap man--Sawkins, +the labourer--was at work. Harlow had been taken away from the attics +to go on with some of the better work, so Sawkins was now working +alone. He had been slogging into it like a Trojan and had done quite a +lot. He had painted not only the sashes of the window, but also a +large part of the glass, and when doing the skirting he had included +part of the floor, sometimes an inch, sometimes half an inch. + +The paint was of a dark drab colour and the surface of the newly +painted doors bore a strong resemblance to corduroy cloth, and from the +bottom corners of nearly every panel there was trickling down a large +tear, as if the doors were weeping for the degenerate condition of the +decorative arts. But these tears caused no throb of pity in the bosom +of Misery: neither did the corduroy-like surface of the work grate upon +his feelings. He perceived them not. He saw only that there was a Lot +of Work done and his soul was filled with rapture as he reflected that +the man who had accomplished all this was paid only fivepence an hour. +At the same time it would never do to let Sawkins know that he was +satisfied with the progress made, so he said: + +'I don't want you to stand too much over this up 'ere, you know, +Sawkins. Just mop it over anyhow, and get away from it as quick as you +can.' + +'All right, sir,' replied Sawkins, wiping the sweat from his brow as +Misery began crawling downstairs again. + +'Where's Harlow go to, then?' he demanded of Philpot. ''E wasn't 'ere +just now, when I came up.' + +''E's gorn downstairs, sir, out the back,' replied Joe, jerking his +thumb over his shoulder and winking at Hunter. ''E'll be back in 'arf +a mo.' And indeed at that moment Harlow was just coming upstairs again. + +''Ere, we can't allow this kind of thing in workin' hours, you know.' +Hunter bellowed. 'There's plenty of time for that in the dinner hour!' + +Nimrod now went down to the drawing-room, which Easton and Owen had +been painting. He stood here deep in thought for some time, mentally +comparing the quantity of work done by the two men in this room with +that done by Sawkins in the attics. Misery was not a painter himself: +he was a carpenter, and he thought but little of the difference in the +quality of the work: to him it was all about the same: just plain +painting. + +'I believe it would pay us a great deal better,' he thought to himself, +'if we could get hold of a few more lightweights like Sawkins.' And +with his mind filled with this reflection he shortly afterwards sneaked +stealthily from the house. + + + +Chapter 14 + +Three Children. The Wages of Intelligence + + +Owen spent the greater part of the dinner hour by himself in the +drawing-room making pencil sketches in his pocket-book and taking +measurements. In the evening after leaving off, instead of going +straight home as usual he went round to the Free Library to see if he +could find anything concerning Moorish decorative work in any of the +books there. Although it was only a small and ill-equipped institution +he was rewarded by the discovery of illustrations of several examples +of which he made sketches. After about an hour spent this way, as he +was proceeding homewards he observed two children--a boy and a +girl--whose appearance seemed familiar. They were standing at the +window of a sweetstuff shop examining the wares exposed therein. As +Owen came up the children turned round and they recognized each other +simultaneously. They were Charley and Elsie Linden. Owen spoke to +them as he drew near and the boy appealed to him for his opinion +concerning a dispute they had been having. + +'I say, mister. Which do you think is the best: a fardensworth of +everlasting stickjaw torfee, or a prize packet?' + +'I'd rather have a prize packet,' replied Owen, unhesitatingly. + +'There! I told you so!' cried Elsie, triumphantly. + +'Well, I don't care. I'd sooner 'ave the torfee,' said Charley, +doggedly. + +'Why, can't you agree which of the two to buy?' + +'Oh no, it's not that,' replied Elsie. 'We was only just SUPPOSING +what we'd buy if we 'ad a fardin; but we're not really goin' to buy +nothing, because we ain't got no money.' + +'Oh, I see,' said Owen. 'But I think _I_ have some money,' and putting +his hand into his pocket he produced two halfpennies and gave one to +each of the children, who immediately went in to buy the toffee and the +prize packet, and when they came out he walked along with them, as they +were going in the same direction as he was: indeed, they would have to +pass by his house. + +'Has your grandfather got anything to do yet?' he inquired as they went +along. + +'No. 'E's still walkin' about, mister,' replied Charley. + +When they reached Owen's door he invited them to come up to see the +kitten, which they had been inquiring about on the way. Frankie was +delighted with these two visitors, and whilst they were eating some +home-made cakes that Nora gave them, he entertained them by displaying +the contents of his toy box, and the antics of the kitten, which was +the best toy of all, for it invented new games all the time: acrobatic +performances on the rails of chairs; curtain climbing; running slides +up and down the oilcloth; hiding and peeping round corners and under +the sofa. The kitten cut so many comical capers, and in a little while +the children began to create such an uproar, that Nora had to interfere +lest the people in the flat underneath should be annoyed. + +However, Elsie and Charley were not able to stay very long, because +their mother would be anxious about them, but they promised to come +again some other day to play with Frankie. + +'I'm going to 'ave a prize next Sunday at our Sunday School,' said +Elsie as they were leaving. + +'What are you going to get it for?' asked Nora. + +''Cause I learned my text properly. I had to learn the whole of the +first chapter of Matthew by heart and I never made one single mistake! +So teacher said she'd give me a nice book next Sunday.' + +'I 'ad one too, the other week, about six months ago, didn't I, Elsie?' +said Charley. + +'Yes,' replied Elsie and added: 'Do they give prizes at your Sunday +School, Frankie?' + +'I don't go to Sunday School.' + +'Ain't you never been?' said Charley in a tone of surprise. + +'No,' replied Frankie. 'Dad says I have quite enough of school all the +week.' + +'You ought to come to ours, man!' urged Charley. 'It's not like being +in school at all! And we 'as a treat in the summer, and prizes and +sometimes a magic lantern 'tainment. It ain't 'arf all right, I can +tell you.' + +Frankie looked inquiringly at his mother. + +'Might I go, Mum?' + +'Yes, if you like, dear.' + +'But I don't know the way.' + +'Oh, it's not far from 'ere,' cried Charley. 'We 'as to pass by your +'ouse when we're goin', so I'll call for you on Sunday if you like.' + +'It's only just round in Duke Street; you know, the "Shining Light +Chapel",' said Elsie. 'It commences at three o'clock.' + +'All right,' said Nora. 'I'll have Frankie ready at a quarter to +three. But now you must run home as fast as you can. Did you like +those cakes?' + +'Yes, thank you very much,' answered Elsie. + +'Not 'arf!' said Charley. + +'Does your mother make cakes for you sometimes?' + +'She used to, but she's too busy now, making blouses and one thing and +another,' Elsie answered. + +'I suppose she hasn't much time for cooking,' said Nora, 'so I've +wrapped up some more of those cakes in this parcel for you to take home +for tomorrow. I think you can manage to carry it all right, can't you, +Charley?' + +'I think I'd better carry it myself,' said Elsie. 'Charley's SO +careless, he's sure to lose some of them.' + +'I ain't no more careless than you are,' cried Charley, indignantly. +'What about the time you dropped the quarter of butter you was sent for +in the mud?' + +'That wasn't carelessness: that was an accident, and it wasn't butter +at all: it was margarine, so there!' + +Eventually it was arranged that they were to carry the parcel in turns, +Elsie to have first innings. Frankie went downstairs to the front door +with them to see them off, and as they went down the street he shouted +after them: + +'Mind you remember, next Sunday!' + +'All right,' Charley shouted back. 'We shan't forget.' + + + +On Thursday Owen stayed at home until after breakfast to finish the +designs which he had promised to have ready that morning. + +When he took them to the office at nine o'clock, the hour at which he +had arranged to meet Rushton, the latter had not yet arrived, and he +did not put in an appearance until half an hour later. Like the +majority of people who do brain work, he needed a great deal more rest +than those who do only mere physical labour. + +'Oh, you've brought them sketches, I suppose,' he remarked in a surly +tone as he came in. 'You know, there was no need for you to wait: you +could 'ave left 'em 'ere and gone on to your job.' + +He sat down at his desk and looked carelessly at the drawing that Owen +handed to him. It was on a sheet of paper about twenty-four by +eighteen inches. The design was drawn with pencil and one half of it +was . + +'That's for the ceiling,' said Owen. 'I hadn't time to colour all of +it.' + +With an affectation of indifference, Rushton laid the drawing down and +took the other which Owen handed to him. + +'This is for the large wall. The same design would be adapted for the +other walls; and this one shows the door and the panels under the +window.' + +Rushton expressed no opinion about the merits of the drawings. He +examined them carelessly one after the other, and then, laying them +down, he inquired: + +'How long would it take you to do this work--if we get the job?' + +'About three weeks: say 150 hours. That is--the decorative work only. +Of course, the walls and ceiling would have to be painted first: they +will need three coats of white.' + +Rushton scribbled a note on a piece of paper. + +'Well,' he said, after a pause, 'you can leave these 'ere and I'll see +Mr Sweater about it and tell 'im what it will cost, and if he decides +to have it done I'll let you know.' + +He put the drawings aside with the air of a man who has other matters +to attend to, and began to open one of the several letters that were on +his desk. He meant this as an intimation that the audience was at an +end and that he desired the 'hand' to retire from the presence. Owen +understood this, but he did not retire, because it was necessary to +mention one or two things which Rushton would have to allow for when +preparing the estimate. + +'Of course I should want some help,' he said. 'I should need a man +occasionally, and the boy most of the time. Then there's the gold +leaf--say, fifteen books.' + +'Don't you think it would be possible to use gold paint?' + +'I'm afraid not.' + +'Is there anything else?' inquired Rushton as he finished writing down +these items. + +'I think that's all, except a few sheets of cartridge paper for +stencils and working drawings. The quantity of paint necessary for the +decorative work will be very small.' + +As soon as Owen was gone, Rushton took up the designs and examined them +attentively. + +'These are all right,' he muttered. 'Good enough for anywhere. If he +can paint anything like as well as this on the walls and ceiling of the +room, it will stand all the looking at that anyone in this town is +likely to give it.' + +'Let's see,' he continued. 'He said three weeks, but he's so anxious +to do the job that he's most likely under-estimated the time; I'd +better allow four weeks: that means about 200 hours: 200 hours at +eight-pence: how much is that? And say he has a painter to help him +half the time. 100 hours at sixpence-ha'penny.' + +He consulted a ready reckoner that was on the desk. + +'Time, L9.7.6. Materials: fifteen books of gold, say a pound. Then +there's the cartridge paper and the colours--say another pound, at the +outside. Boy's time? Well, he gets no wages as yet, so we needn't +mention that at all. Then there's the preparing of the room. Three +coats of white paint. I wish Hunter was here to give me an idea what +it will cost.' + +As if in answer to his wish, Nimrod entered the office at that moment, +and in reply to Rushton's query said that to give the walls and ceiling +three coats of paint would cost about three pounds five for time and +material. Between them the two brain workers figured that fifteen +pounds would cover the entire cost of the work--painting and decorating. + +'Well, I reckon we can charge Sweater forty-five pounds for it,' said +Rushton. 'It isn't like an ordinary job, you know. If he gets a +London firm to do it, it'll cost him double that, if not more.' + +Having arrived at this decision, Rushton rung up Sweater's Emporium on +the telephone, and, finding that Mr Sweater was there, he rolled up the +designs and set out for that gentleman's office. + +The men work with their hands, and the masters work with their brains. +What a dreadful calamity it would be for the world and for mankind if +all these brain workers were to go on strike. + + + +Chapter 15 + +The Undeserving Persons and the Upper and Nether Millstones + + +Hunter had taken on three more painters that morning. Bundy and two +labourers had commenced the work of putting in the new drains; the +carpenters were back again doing some extra work, and there was also a +plumber working on the house; so there was quite a little crowd in the +kitchen at dinner-time. Crass had been waiting for a suitable +opportunity to produce the newspaper cutting which it will be +remembered he showed to Easton on Monday morning, but he had waited in +vain, for there had been scarcely any 'political' talk at meal-times +all the week, and it was now Thursday. As far as Owen was concerned, +his thoughts were so occupied with the designs for the drawing-room +that he had no time for anything else, and most of the others were only +too willing to avoid a subject which frequently led to unpleasantness. +As a rule Crass himself had no liking for such discussion, but he was +so confident of being able to 'flatten out' Owen with the cutting from +the Obscurer that he had several times tried to lead the conversation +into the desired channel, but so far without success. + +During dinner--as they called it--various subjects were discussed. +Harlow mentioned that he had found traces of bugs in one of the +bedrooms upstairs and this called forth a number of anecdotes of those +vermin and of houses infested by them. Philpot remembered working in a +house over at Windley; the people who lived in it were very dirty and +had very little furniture; no bedsteads, the beds consisting of +dilapidated mattresses and rags on the floor. He declared that these +ragged mattresses used to wander about the rooms by themselves. The +house was so full of fleas that if one placed a sheet of newspaper on +the floor one could hear and see them jumping on it. In fact, directly +one went into that house one was covered from head to foot with fleas! +During the few days he worked at that place, he lost several pounds in +weight, and of evenings as he walked homewards the children and people +in the streets, observing his ravaged countenance, thought he was +suffering from some disease and used to get out of his way when they +saw him coming. + +There were several other of these narratives, four or five men talking +at the top of their voices at the same time, each one telling a +different story. At first each story-teller addressed himself to the +company generally, but after a while, finding it impossible to make +himself heard, he would select some particular individual who seemed +disposed to listen and tell him the story. It sometimes happened that +in the middle of the tale the man to whom it was being told would +remember a somewhat similar adventure of his own, which he would +immediately proceed to relate without waiting for the other to finish, +and each of them was generally so interested in the gruesome details of +his own story that he was unconscious of the fact that the other was +telling one at all. In a contest of this kind the victory usually went +to the man with the loudest voice, but sometimes a man who had a weak +voice, scored by repeating the same tale several times until someone +heard it. + +Barrington, who seldom spoke and was an ideal listener, was +appropriated by several men in succession, who each told him a +different yarn. There was one man sitting on an up-ended pail in the +far corner of the room and it was evident from the movements of his +lips that he also was relating a story, although nobody knew what it +was about or heard a single word of it, for no one took the slightest +notice of him... + +When the uproar had subsided Harlow remembered the case of a family +whose house got into such a condition that the landlord had given them +notice and the father had committed suicide because the painters had +come to turn 'em out of house and home. There were a man, his wife and +daughter--a girl about seventeen--living in the house, and all three of +'em used to drink like hell. As for the woman, she COULD shift it and +no mistake! Several times a day she used to send the girl with a jug +to the pub at the corner. When the old man was out, one could have +anything one liked to ask for from either of 'em for half a pint of +beer, but for his part, said Harlow, he could never fancy it. They +were both too ugly. + +The finale of this tale was received with a burst of incredulous +laughter by those who heard it. + +'Do you 'ear what Harlow says, Bob?' Easton shouted to Crass. + +'No. What was it?' + +''E ses 'e once 'ad a chance to 'ave something but 'e wouldn't take it +on because it was too ugly!' + +'If it 'ad bin me, I should 'ave shut me bl--y eyes,' cried Sawkins. 'I +wouldn't pass it for a trifle like that.' + +'No,' said Crass amid laughter, 'and you can bet your life 'e didn't +lose it neither, although 'e tries to make 'imself out to be so +innocent.' + +'I always though old Harlow was a bl--y liar,' remarked Bundy, 'but now +we knows 'e is.' + +Although everyone pretended to disbelieve him, Harlow stuck to his +version of the story. + +'It's not their face you want, you know,' added Bundy as he helped +himself to some more tea. + +'I know it wasn't my old woman's face that I was after last night,' +observed Crass; and then he proceeded amid roars of laughter to give a +minutely detailed account of what had taken place between himself and +his wife after they had retired for the night. + +This story reminded the man on the pail of a very strange dream he had +had a few weeks previously: 'I dreamt I was walkin' along the top of a +'igh cliff or some sich place, and all of a sudden the ground give way +under me feet and I began to slip down and down and to save meself from +going over I made a grab at a tuft of grass as was growin' just within +reach of me 'and. And then I thought that some feller was 'ittin me on +the 'ead with a bl--y great stick, and tryin' to make me let go of the +tuft of grass. And then I woke up to find my old woman shouting out +and punchin' me with 'er fists. She said I was pullin' 'er 'air!' + +While the room was in an uproar with the merriment induced by these +stories, Crass rose from his seat and crossed over to where his +overcoat was hanging on a nail in the wall, and took from the pocket a +piece of card about eight inches by about four inches. One side of it +was covered with printing, and as he returned to his seat Crass called +upon the others to listen while he read it aloud. He said it was one +of the best things he had ever seen: it had been given to him by a +bloke in the Cricketers the other night. + +Crass was not a very good reader, but he was able to read this all +right because he had read it so often that he almost knew it by heart. +It was entitled 'The Art of Flatulence', and it consisted of a number +of rules and definitions. Shouts of laughter greeted the reading of +each paragraph, and when he had ended, the piece of dirty card was +handed round for the benefit of those who wished to read it for +themselves. Several of the men, however, when it was offered to them, +refused to take it, and with evident disgust suggested that it should +be put into the fire. This view did not commend itself to Crass, who, +after the others had finished with it, put it back in the pocket of his +coat. + +Meanwhile, Bundy stood up to help himself to some more tea. The cup he +was drinking from had a large piece broken out of one side and did not +hold much, so he usually had to have three or four helpings. + +'Anyone else want any' he asked. + +Several cups and jars were passed to him. These vessels had been +standing on the floor, and the floor was very dirty and covered with +dust, so before dipping them into the pail, Bundy--who had been working +at the drains all morning--wiped the bottoms of the jars upon his +trousers, on the same place where he was in the habit of wiping his +hands when he happened to get some dirt on them. He filled the jars so +full that as he held them by the rims and passed them to their owners +part of the contents slopped over and trickled through his fingers. By +the time he had finished the floor was covered with little pools of tea. + +'They say that Gord made everything for some useful purpose,' remarked +Harlow, reverting to the original subject, 'but I should like to know +what the hell's the use of sich things as bugs and fleas and the like.' + +'To teach people to keep theirselves clean, of course,' said Slyme. + +'That's a funny subject, ain't it?' continued Harlow, ignoring Slyme's +answer. 'They say as all diseases is caused by little insects. If +Gord 'adn't made no cancer germs or consumption microbes there wouldn't +be no cancer or consumption.' + +'That's one of the proofs that there ISN'T an individual God,' said +Owen. 'If we were to believe that the universe and everything that +lives was deliberately designed and created by God, then we must also +believe that He made his disease germs you are speaking of for the +purpose of torturing His other creatures.' + +'You can't tell me a bloody yarn like that,' interposed Crass, roughly. +'There's a Ruler over us, mate, and so you're likely to find out.' + +'If Gord didn't create the world, 'ow did it come 'ere?' demanded Slyme. + +'I know no more about that than you do,' replied Owen. 'That is--I +know nothing. The only difference between us is that you THINK you +know. You think you know that God made the universe; how long it took +Him to do it; why He made it; how long it's been in existence and how +it will finally pass away. You also imagine you know that we shall +live after we're dead; where we shall go, and the kind of existence we +shall have. In fact, in the excess of your "humility", you think you +know all about it. But really you know no more of these things than +any other human being does; that is, you know NOTHING.' + +'That's only YOUR opinion,' said Slyme. + +'If we care to take the trouble to learn,' Owen went on, 'we can know a +little of how the universe has grown and changed; but of the beginning +we know nothing.' + +'That's just my opinion, matey,' observed Philpot. 'It's just a bloody +mystery, and that's all about it.' + +'I don't pretend to 'ave no 'ead knowledge,' said Slyme, 'but 'ead +knowledge won't save a man's soul: it's 'EART knowledge as does that. I +knows in my 'eart as my sins is all hunder the Blood, and it's knowin' +that, wot's given 'appiness and the peace which passes all +understanding to me ever since I've been a Christian.' + +'Glory, glory, hallelujah!' shouted Bundy, and nearly everyone laughed. + +'"Christian" is right,' sneered Owen. 'You've got some title to call +yourself a Christian, haven't you? As for the happiness that passes +all understanding, it certainly passes MY understanding how you can be +happy when you believe that millions of people are being tortured in +Hell; and it also passes my understanding why you are not ashamed of +yourself for being happy under such circumstances.' + +'Ah, well, you'll find it all out when you come to die, mate,' replied +Slyme in a threatening tone. 'You'll think and talk different then!' + +'That's just wot gets over ME,' observed Harlow. 'It don't seem right +that after living in misery and poverty all our bloody lives, workin' +and slavin' all the hours that Gord A'mighty sends, that we're to be +bloody well set fire and burned in 'ell for all eternity! It don't +seem feasible to me, you know.' + +'It's my belief,' said Philpot, profoundly, 'that when you're dead, +you're done for. That's the end of you.' + +'That's what _I_ say,' remarked Easton. 'As for all this religious +business, it's just a money-making dodge. It's the parson's trade, +just the same as painting is ours, only there's no work attached to it +and the pay's a bloody sight better than ours is.' + +'It's their livin', and a bloody good livin' too, if you ask me,' said +Bundy. + +'Yes,' said Harlow; 'they lives on the fat o' the land, and wears the +best of everything, and they does nothing for it but talk a lot of +twaddle two or three times a week. The rest of the time they spend +cadgin' money orf silly old women who thinks it's a sorter fire +insurance.' + +'It's an old sayin' and a true one,' chimed in the man on the upturned +pail. 'Parsons and publicans is the worst enemies the workin' man ever +'ad. There may be SOME good 'uns, but they're few and far between.' + +'If I could only get a job like the Harchbishop of Canterbury,' said +Philpot, solemnly, 'I'd leave this firm.' + +'So would I,' said Harlow, 'if I was the Harchbishop of Canterbury, I'd +take my pot and brushes down the office and shy 'em through the bloody +winder and tell ole Misery to go to 'ell.' + +'Religion is a thing that don't trouble ME much,' remarked Newman; 'and +as for what happens to you after death, it's a thing I believe in +leavin' till you comes to it--there's no sense in meetin' trouble +'arfway. All the things they tells us may be true or they may not, but +it takes me all my time to look after THIS world. I don't believe I've +been to church more than arf a dozen times since I've been +married--that's over fifteen years ago now--and then it's been when the +kids 'ave been christened. The old woman goes sometimes and of course +the young 'uns goes; you've got to tell 'em something or other, and +they might as well learn what they teaches at the Sunday School as +anything else.' + +A general murmur of approval greeted this. It seemed to be the almost +unanimous opinion, that, whether it were true or not, 'religion' was a +nice thing to teach children. + +'I've not been even once since I was married,' said Harlow, 'and I +sometimes wish to Christ I 'adn't gorn then.' + +'I don't see as it matters a dam wot a man believes,' said Philpot, 'as +long as you don't do no 'arm to nobody. If you see a poor b--r wot's +down on 'is luck, give 'im a 'elpin' 'and. Even if you ain't got no +money you can say a kind word. If a man does 'is work and looks arter +'is 'ome and 'is young 'uns, and does a good turn to a fellow creature +when 'e can, I reckon 'e stands as much chance of getting into +'eaven--if there IS sich a place--as some of there 'ere Bible-busters, +whether 'e ever goes to church or chapel or not.' + +These sentiments were echoed by everyone with the solitary exception of +Slyme, who said that Philpot would find out his mistake after he was +dead, when he would have to stand before the Great White Throne for +judgement! + +'And at the Last Day, when yer sees the moon turned inter Blood, you'll +be cryin' hout for the mountings and the rocks to fall on yer and 'ide +yer from the wrath of the Lamb!' + +The others laughed derisively. + +'I'm a Bush Baptist meself,' remarked the man on the upturned pail. +This individual, Dick Wantley by name, was of what is usually termed a +'rugged' cast of countenance. He reminded one strongly of an ancient +gargoyle, or a dragon. + +Most of the hands had by now lit their pipes, but there were a few who +preferred chewing their tobacco. As they smoked or chewed they +expectorated upon the floor or into the fire. Wantley was one of those +who preferred chewing and he had been spitting upon the floor to such +an extent that he was by this time partly surrounded by a kind of +semicircular moat of dark brown spittle. + +'I'm a Bush Baptist!' he shouted across the moat, 'and you all knows +wot that is.' + +This confession of faith caused a fresh outburst of hilarity, because +of course everyone knew what a Bush Baptist was. + +'If 'evven's goin' to be full of sich b--r's as Hunter,' observed +Eaton, 'I think I'd rather go to the other place.' + +'If ever ole Misery DOES get into 'eaven,' said Philpot, ''e won't stop +there very long. I reckon 'e'll be chucked out of it before 'e's been +there a week, because 'e's sure to start pinchin' the jewels out of the +other saints' crowns.' + +'Well, if they won't 'ave 'im in 'eaven, I'm sure I don't know wot's to +become of 'im,' said Harlow with pretended concern, 'because I don't +believe 'e'd be allowed into 'ell, now.' + +'Why not?' demanded Bundy. 'I should think it's just the bloody place +for sich b--r's as 'im.' + +'So it used to be at one time o' day, but they've changed all that now. +They've 'ad a revolution down there: deposed the Devil, elected a +parson as President, and started puttin' the fire out.' + +'From what I hears of it,' continued Harlow when the laughter had +ceased, ''ell is a bloody fine place to live in just now. There's +underground railways and 'lectric trams, and at the corner of nearly +every street there's a sort of pub where you can buy ice-cream, lemon +squash, four ale, and American cold drinks; and you're allowed to sit +in a refrigerator for two hours for a tanner.' + +Although they laughed and made fun of these things the reader must not +think that they really doubted the truth of the Christian religion, +because--although they had all been brought up by 'Christian' parents +and had been 'educated' in 'Christian' schools--none of them knew +enough about Christianity to either really believe it or disbelieve it. +The imposters who obtain a comfortable living by pretending to be the +ministers and disciples of the Workman of Nazareth are too cunning to +encourage their dupes to acquire anything approaching an intelligent +understanding of the subject. They do not want people to know or +understand anything: they want them to have Faith--to believe without +knowledge, understanding, or evidence. For years Harlow and his +mates--when children--had been 'taught' 'Christianity' in day school, +Sunday School and in church or chapel, and now they knew practically +nothing about it! But they were 'Christians' all the same. They +believed that the Bible was the word of God, but they didn't know where +it came from, how long it had been in existence, who wrote it, who +translated it or how many different versions there were. Most of them +were almost totally unacquainted with the contents of the book itself. +But all the same, they believed it--after a fashion. + +'But puttin' all jokes aside,' said Philpot, 'I can't believe there's +sich a place as 'ell. There may be some kind of punishment, but I +don't believe it's a real fire.' + +'Nor nobody else, what's got any sense,' replied Harlow, contemptuously. + +'I believe as THIS world is 'ell,' said Crass, looking around with a +philosophic expression. This opinion was echoed by most of the others, +although Slyme remained silent and Owen laughed. + +'Wot the bloody 'ell are YOU laughin' at?' Crass demanded in an +indignant tone. + +'I was laughing because you said you think this world is hell.' + +'Well, I don't see nothing to laugh at in that,' said Crass. + +'So it IS a 'ell,' said Easton. 'There can't be anywheres much worse +than this.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' said the man behind the moat. + +'What I was laughing at is this,' said Owen. 'The present system of +managing the affairs of the world is so bad and has produced such +dreadful results that you are of the opinion that the earth is a hell: +and yet you are a Conservative! You wish to preserve the present +system--the system which has made the world into a hell!' + +'I thought we shouldn't get through the dinner hour without politics if +Owen was 'ere,' growled Bundy. 'Bloody sickenin' I call it.' + +'Don't be 'ard on 'im,' said Philpot. ''E's been very quiet for the +last few days.' + +'We'll 'ave to go through it today, though,' remarked Harlow +despairingly. 'I can see it comin'.' + +'I'M not goin' through it,' said Bundy, 'I'm orf!' And he accordingly +drank the remainder of his tea, closed his empty dinner basket and, +having placed it on the mantelshelf, made for the door. + +'I'll leave you to it,' he said as he went out. The others laughed. + +Crass, remembering the cutting from the Obscurer that he had in his +pocket, was secretly very pleased at the turn the conversation was +taking. He turned roughly on Owen: + +'The other day, when we was talkin' about the cause of poverty, you +contradicted everybody. Everyone else was wrong! But you yourself +couldn't tell us what's the cause of poverty, could you?' + +'I think I could.' + +'Oh, of course, you think you know,' sneered Crass, 'and of course you +think your opinion's right and everybody else's is wrong.' + +'Yes,' replied Owen. + +Several men expressed their abhorrence of this intolerant attitude of +Owen's, but the latter rejoined: + +'Of course I think that my opinions are right and that everyone who +differs from me is wrong. If I didn't think their opinions were wrong +I wouldn't differ from them. If I didn't think my own opinions right I +wouldn't hold them.' + +'But there's no need to keep on arguin' about it day after day,' said +Crass. 'You've got your opinion and I've got mine. Let everyone enjoy +his own opinion, I say.' + +A murmur of approbation from the crowd greeted these sentiments; but +Owen rejoined: + +'But we can't both be right; if your opinions are right and mine are +not, how am I to find out the truth if we never talk about them?' + +'Well, wot do you reckon is the cause of poverty, then?' demanded +Easton. + +'The present system--competition--capitalism.' + +'It's all very well to talk like that,' snarled Crass, to whom this +statement conveyed no meaning whatever. 'But 'ow do you make it out?' + +'Well, I put it like that for the sake of shortness,' replied Owen. +'Suppose some people were living in a house--' + +'More supposin'!' sneered Crass. + +'And suppose they were always ill, and suppose that the house was badly +built, the walls so constructed that they drew and retained moisture, +the roof broken and leaky, the drains defective, the doors and windows +ill-fitting and the rooms badly shaped and draughty. If you were asked +to name, in a word, the cause of the ill-health of the people who lived +there you would say--the house. All the tinkering in the world would +not make that house fit to live in; the only thing to do with it would +be to pull it down and build another. Well, we're all living in a +house called the Money System; and as a result most of us are suffering +from a disease called poverty. There's so much the matter with the +present system that it's no good tinkering at it. Everything about it +is wrong and there's nothing about it that's right. There's only one +thing to be done with it and that is to smash it up and have a +different system altogether. We must get out of it.' + +'It seems to me that that's just what you're trying to do,' remanded +Harlow, sarcastically. 'You seem to be tryin' to get out of answering +the question what Easton asked you.' + +'Yes!' cried Crass, fiercely. 'Why don't you answer the bloody +question? Wot's the cause of poverty?' + +'What the 'ell's the matter with the present system?' demanded Sawkins. + +'Ow's it goin' to be altered?' said Newman. + +'Wot the bloody 'ell sort of a system do YOU think we ought to 'ave?' +shouted the man behind the moat. + +'It can't never be altered,' said Philpot. 'Human nature's human +nature and you can't get away from it.' + +'Never mind about human nature,' shouted Crass. 'Stick to the point. +Wot's the cause of poverty?' + +'Oh, b--r the cause of poverty!' said one of the new hands. 'I've 'ad +enough of this bloody row.' And he stood up and prepared to go out of +the room. + +This individual had two patches on the seat of his trousers and the +bottoms of the legs of that garment were frayed and ragged. He had +been out of work for about six weeks previous to having been taken on +by Rushton & Co. During most of that time he and his family had been +existing in a condition of semi-starvation on the earnings of his wife +as a charwoman and on the scraps of food she brought home from the +houses where she worked. But all the same, the question of what is the +cause of poverty had no interest for him. + +'There are many causes,' answered Owen, 'but they are all part of and +inseparable from the system. In order to do away with poverty we must +destroy the causes: to do away with the causes we must destroy the +whole system.' + +'What are the causes, then?' + +'Well, money, for one thing.' + +This extraordinary assertion was greeted with a roar of merriment, in +the midst of which Philpot was heard to say that to listen to Owen was +as good as going to a circus. Money was the cause of poverty! + +'I always thought it was the want of it!' said the man with the patches +on the seat of his trousers as he passed out of the door. + +'Other things,' continued Owen, 'are private ownership of land, private +ownership of railways, tramways, gasworks, waterworks, private +ownership of factories, and the other means of producing the +necessaries and comforts of life. Competition in business--' + +'But 'ow do you make it out?' demanded Crass, impatiently. + +Owen hesitated. To his mind the thing appeared very clear and simple. +The causes of poverty were so glaringly evident that he marvelled that +any rational being should fail to perceive them; but at the same time +he found it very difficult to define them himself. He could not think +of words that would convey his thoughts clearly to these others who +seemed so hostile and unwilling to understand, and who appeared to have +made up their minds to oppose and reject whatever he said. They did +not know what were the causes of poverty and apparently they did not +WANT to know. + +'Well, I'll try to show you one of the causes,' he said nervously at +last. + +He picked up a piece of charred wood that had fallen from the fire and +knelt down and began to draw upon the floor. Most of the others +regarded him, with looks in which an indulgent, contemptuous kind of +interest mingled with an air of superiority and patronage. There was +no doubt, they thought, that Owen was a clever sort of chap: his work +proved that: but he was certainly a little bit mad. + +By this time Owen had drawn a circle about two feet in diameter. Inside +he had drawn two squares, one much larger than the other. These two +squares he filled in solid black with the charcoal. + +'Wot's it all about?' asked Crass with a sneer. + +'Why, can't you see?' said Philpot with a wink. ''E's goin' to do some +conjurin'! In a minit 'e'll make something pass out o' one o' them +squares into the other and no one won't see 'ow it's done.' + +When he had finished drawing, Owen remained for a few minutes awkwardly +silent, oppressed by the anticipation of ridicule and a sense of his +inability to put his thoughts into plain language. He began to wish +that he had not undertaken this task. At last, with an effort, he +began to speak in a halting, nervous way: + + ....... + ... ... + .. .. + . ### . + . ### . + . . + . ############### . + . ############### . + . ############### . + . ############### . + . ############### . + . ############### . + . . + .. .. + ... ... + ......... + +'This circle--or rather the space inside the circle--is supposed to +represent England.' + +'Well, I never knowed it was round before,' jeered Crass. 'I've heard +as the WORLD is round--' + +'I never said it was the shape--I said it was supposed to REPRESENT +England.' + + +'Oh, I see. I thought we'd very soon begin supposin'.' + +'The two black squares,' continued Owen, 'represent the people who live +in the country. The small square represents a few thousand people. +The large square stands for the remainder--about forty millions--that +is, the majority.' + +'We ain't sich bloody fools as to think that the largest number is the +minority,' interrupted Crass. + +'The greater number of the people represented by the large black square +work for their living: and in return for their labour they receive +money: some more, some less than others.' + +'You don't think they'd be sich bloody fools as to work for nothing, do +you?' said Newman. + +'I suppose you think they ought all to get the same wages!' cried +Harlow. 'Do you think it's right that a scavenger should get as much +as a painter?' + +'I'm not speaking about that at all,' replied Owen. 'I'm trying to +show you what I think is one of the causes of poverty.' + +'Shut up, can't you, Harlow,' remonstrated Philpot, who began to feel +interested. 'We can't all talk at once.' + +'I know we can't,' replied Harlow in an aggrieved tone: 'but 'e takes +sich a 'ell of a time to say wot 'e's got to say. Nobody else can't +get a word in edgeways.' + +'In order that these people may live,' continued Owen, pointing to the +large black square, 'it is first necessary that they shall have a PLACE +to live in--' + +'Well! I should never a thought it!' exclaimed the man on the pail, +pretending to be much impressed. The others laughed, and two or three +of them went out of the room, contemptuously remarking to each other in +an audible undertone as they went: + +'Bloody rot!' + +'Wonder wot the bloody 'ell 'e thinks 'e is? A sort of schoolmaster?' + +Owen's nervousness increased as he continued: + +'Now, they can't live in the air or in the sea. These people are land +animals, therefore they must live on the land.' + +'Wot do yer mean by animals?' demanded Slyme. + +'A human bean ain't a animal!' said Crass indignantly. + +'Yes, we are!' cried Harlow. 'Go into any chemist's shop you like and +ask the bloke, and 'e'll tell you--' + +'Oh, blow that!' interrupted Philpot. 'Let's 'ear wot Owen's sayin'.' + +'They must live on the land: and that's the beginning of the trouble; +because--under the present system--the majority of the people have +really no right to be in the country at all! Under the present system +the country belongs to a few--those who are here represented by this +small black square. If it would pay them to do so, and if they felt so +disposed, these few people have a perfect right--under the present +system--to order everyone else to clear out! + +'But they don't do that, they allow the majority to remain in the land +on one condition--that is, they must pay rent to the few for the +privilege of being permitted to live in the land of their birth. The +amount of rent demanded by those who own this country is so large that, +in order to pay it, the greater number of the majority have often to +deprive themselves and their children, not only of the comforts, but +even the necessaries of life. In the case of the working classes the +rent absorbs at the lowest possible estimate, about one-third of their +total earnings, for it must be remembered that the rent is an expense +that goes on all the time, whether they are employed or not. If they +get into arrears when out of work, they have to pay double when they +get employment again. + +'The majority work hard and live in poverty in order that the minority +may live in luxury without working at all, and as the majority are +mostly fools, they not only agree to pass their lives in incessant +slavery and want, in order to pay this rent to those who own the +country, but they say it is quite right that they should have to do so, +and are very grateful to the little minority for allowing them to +remain in the country at all.' + +Owen paused, and immediately there arose a great clamour from his +listeners. + +'So it IS right, ain't it?' shouted Crass. 'If you 'ad a 'ouse and let +it to someone, you'd want your rent, wouldn't yer?' + +'I suppose,' said Slyme with resentment, for he had some shares in a +local building society, 'after a man's been careful, and scraping and +saving and going without things he ought to 'ave 'ad all 'is life, and +managed to buy a few 'ouses to support 'im in 'is old age--they ought +all to be took away from 'im? Some people,' he added, 'ain't got +common honesty.' + +Nearly everyone had something to say in reprobation of the views +suggested by Owen. Harlow, in a brief but powerful speech, bristling +with numerous sanguinary references to the bottomless pit, protested +against any interference with the sacred rights of property. Easton +listened with a puzzled expression, and Philpot's goggle eyes rolled +horribly as he glared silently at the circle and the two squares. + +'By far the greatest part of the land,' said Owen when the row had +ceased, 'is held by people who have absolutely no moral right to it. +Possession of much of it was obtained by means of murder and theft +perpetrated by the ancestors of the present holders. In other cases, +when some king or prince wanted to get rid of a mistress of whom he had +grown weary, he presented a tract of our country to some 'nobleman' on +condition that he would marry the female. Vast estates were also +bestowed upon the remote ancestors of the present holders in return for +real or alleged services. Listen to this,' he continued as he took a +small newspaper cutting from his pocket-book. + +Crass looked at the piece of paper dolefully. It reminded him of the +one he had in his own pocket, which he was beginning to fear that he +would not have an opportunity of producing today after all. + +'Ballcartridge Rent Day. + +'The hundredth anniversary of the Battle of Ballcartridge occurred +yesterday and in accordance with custom the Duke of Ballcartridge +handed to the authorities the little flag which he annually presents to +the State in virtue of his tenure of the vast tract of this country +which was presented to one of his ancestors--the first Duke--in +addition to his salary, for his services at the battle of Ballcartridge. + +'The flag--which is the only rent the Duke has to pay for the great +estate which brings him in several hundreds of thousands of pounds per +annum--is a small tricoloured one with a staff surmounted by an eagle. + +'The Duke of Blankmind also presents the State with a little +silk flag every year in return for being allowed to retain possession +of that part of England which was presented--in addition to his +salary--to one of His Grace's very remote ancestors, for his services +at the battle of Commissariat--in the Netherlands. + +'The Duke of Southward is another instance,' continued Owen. 'He +"owns" miles of the country we speak of as "ours". Much of his part +consists of confiscated monastery lands which were stolen from the +owners by King Henry VIII and presented to the ancestors of the present +Duke. + +'Whether it was right or wrong that these parts of our country should +ever have been given to those people--the question whether those +ancestor persons were really deserving cases or not--is a thing we need +not trouble ourselves about now. But the present holders are certainly +not deserving people. They do not even take the trouble to pretend +they are. They have done nothing and they do nothing to justify their +possession of these "estates" as they call them. And in my opinion no +man who is in his right mind can really think it's just that these +people should be allowed to prey upon their fellow men as they are +doing now. Or that it is right that their children should be allowed +to continue to prey upon our children for ever! The thousands of +people on those estates work and live in poverty in order that these +three men and their families may enjoy leisure and luxury. Just think +of the absurdity of it!' continued Owen, pointing to the drawings. +'All those people allowing themselves to be overworked and bullied and +starved and robbed by this little crowd here!' + +Observing signs of a renewal of the storm of protests, Owen hurriedly +concluded: + +'Whether it's right or wrong, you can't deny that the fact that this +small minority possesses nearly all the land of the country is one of +the principal causes of the poverty of the majority.' + +'Well, that seems true enough,' said Easton, slowly. 'The rent's the +biggest item a workin' man's got to pay. When you're out of work and +you can't afford other things, you goes without 'em, but the rent 'as +to be paid whether you're workin' or not.' + +'Yes, that's true enough,' said Harlow impatiently; 'but you gets value for +yer money: you can't expect to get a 'ouse for nothing.' + +'Suppose we admits as it's wrong, just for the sake of argyment,' said +Crass in a jeering tone. 'Wot then? Wot about it? 'Ow's it agoin' to +be altered.' + +'Yes!' cried Harlow triumphantly. 'That's the bloody question! 'Ow's +it goin' to be altered? It can't be done!' + +There was a general murmur of satisfaction. Nearly everyone seemed +very pleased to think that the existing state of things could not +possibly be altered. + +'Whether it can be altered or not, whether it's right or wrong, +landlordism is one of the causes of poverty,' Owen repeated. 'Poverty +is not caused by men and women getting married; it's not caused by +machinery; it's not caused by "over-production"; it's not caused by +drink or laziness; and it's not caused by "over-population". It's +caused by Private Monopoly. That is the present system. They have +monopolized everything that it is possible to monopolize; they have got +the whole earth, the minerals in the earth and the streams that water +the earth. The only reason they have not monopolized the daylight and +the air is that it is not possible to do it. If it were possible to +construct huge gasometers and to draw together and compress within them +the whole of the atmosphere, it would have been done long ago, and we +should have been compelled to work for them in order to get money to +buy air to breathe. And if that seemingly impossible thing were +accomplished tomorrow, you would see thousands of people dying for want +of air--or of the money to buy it--even as now thousands are dying for +want of the other necessities of life. You would see people going about +gasping for breath, and telling each other that the likes of them could +not expect to have air to breathe unless they had the money to pay for +it. Most of you here, for instance, would think and say so. Even as +you think at present that it's right for so few people to own the +Earth, the Minerals and the Water, which are all just as necessary as +is the air. In exactly the same spirit as you now say: "It's Their +Land," "It's Their Water," "It's Their Coal," "It's Their Iron," so you +would say "It's Their Air," "These are their gasometers, and what right +have the likes of us to expect them to allow us to breathe for +nothing?" And even while he is doing this the air monopolist will be +preaching sermons on the Brotherhood of Man; he will be dispensing +advice on "Christian Duty" in the Sunday magazines; he will give +utterance to numerous more or less moral maxims for the guidance of the +young. And meantime, all around, people will be dying for want of some +of the air that he will have bottled up in his gasometers. And when +you are all dragging out a miserable existence, gasping for breath or +dying for want of air, if one of your number suggests smashing a hole +in the side of one of the gasometers, you will all fall upon him in the +name of law and order, and after doing your best to tear him limb from +limb, you'll drag him, covered with blood, in triumph to the nearest +Police Station and deliver him up to "justice" in the hope of being +given a few half-pounds of air for your trouble.' + +'I suppose you think the landlords ought to let people live in their +'ouses for nothing?' said Crass, breaking the silence that followed. + +'Certainly,' remarked Harlow, pretending to be suddenly converted to +Owen's views, 'I reckon the landlord ought to pay the rent to the +tenant!' + +'Of course, Landlordism is not the only cause,' said Owen, ignoring +these remarks. 'The wonderful system fosters a great many others. +Employers of labour, for instance, are as great a cause of poverty as +landlords are.' + +This extraordinary statement was received with astonished silence. + +'Do you mean to say that if I'm out of work and a master gives me a +job, that 'e's doin' me a injury?' said Crass at length. + +'No, of course not,' replied Owen. + +'Well, what the bloody 'ell DO yer mean, then?' + +'I mean this: supposing that the owner of a house wishes to have it +repainted. What does he usually do?' + +'As a rule, 'e goes to three or four master painters and asks 'em to +give 'im a price for the job.' + +'Yes; and those master painters are so eager to get the work that they +cut the price down to what they think is the lowest possible point,' +answered Owen, 'and the lowest usually gets the job. The successful +tenderer has usually cut the price so fine that to make it pay he has +to scamp the work, pay low wages, and drive and sweat the men whom he +employs. He wants them to do two days' work for one day's pay. The +result is that a job which--if it were done properly--would employ say +twenty men for two months, is rushed and scamped in half that time with +half that number of men. + +'This means that--in one such case as this--ten men are deprived of one +month's employment; and ten other men are deprived of two months' +employment; and all because the employers have been cutting each +other's throats to get the work.' + +'And we can't 'elp ourselves, you nor me either,' said Harlow. +'Supposing one of us on this job was to make up 'is mind not to tear +into it like we do, but just keep on steady and do a fair day's work: +wot would 'appen?' + +No one answered; but the same thought was in everyone's mind. Such a +one would be quickly marked by Hunter; and even if the latter failed to +notice it would not be long before Crass reported his conduct. + +'We can't 'elp ourselves,' said Easton, gloomily. 'If one man won't do +it there's twenty others ready to take 'is place.' + +'We could help ourselves to a certain extent if we would stand by each +other. If, for instance, we all belonged to the Society,' said Owen. + +'I don't believe in the Society,' observed Crass. 'I can't see as it's +right that a inferior man should 'ave the same wages as me.' + +'They're a drunken lot of beer-swillers,' remarked Slyme. 'That's why +they always 'as their meetings in public 'ouses.' + +Harlow made no comment on this question. He had at one time belonged +to the Union and he was rather ashamed of having fallen away from it. + +'Wot good 'as the Society ever done 'ere?' said Easton. 'None that I +ever 'eard of.' + +'It might be able to do some good if most of us belonged to it; but +after all, that's another matter. Whether we could help ourselves or +not, the fact remains that we don't. But you must admit that this +competition of the employers is one of the causes of unemployment and +poverty, because it's not only in our line--exactly the same thing +happens in every other trade and industry. Competing employers are the +upper and nether millstones which grind the workers between them.' + +'I suppose you think there oughtn't to be no employers at all?' sneered +Crass. 'Or p'raps you think the masters ought to do all the bloody +work theirselves, and give us the money?' + +'I don't see 'ow its goin' to be altered,' remarked Harlow. 'There +MUST be masters, and SOMEONE 'as to take charge of the work and do the +thinkin'.' + +'Whether it can be altered or not,' said Owen, 'Landlordism and +Competing Employers are two of the causes of poverty. But of course +they're only a small part of the system which produces luxury, +refinement and culture for a few, and condemns the majority to a +lifelong struggle with adversity, and many thousands to degradation, +hunger and rags. This is the system you all uphold and defend, +although you don't mind admitting that it has made the world into a +hell.' + +Crass slowly drew the Obscurer cutting from his waistcoat pocket, but +after a moment's thought he replaced it, deciding to defer its +production till a more suitable occasion. + +'But you 'aven't told us yet 'ow you makes out that money causes +poverty,' cried Harlow, winking at the others. 'That's what I'M +anxious to 'ear about!' + +'So am I,' remarked the man behind the moat. 'I was just wondering +whether I 'adn't better tell ole Misery that I don't want no wages this +week.' + +'I think I'll tell 'im on Saterday to keep MY money and get 'imself a +few drinks with it,' said Philpot. 'It might cheer 'im up a bit and +make 'im a little more sociable and friendly like.' + +'Money IS the principal cause of poverty,' said Owen. + +''Ow do yer make it out?' cried Sawkins. + +But their curiosity had to remain unsatisfied for the time being +because Crass announced that it was 'just on it'. + + + +Chapter 16 + +True Freedom + + +About three o'clock that afternoon, Rushton suddenly appeared and began +walking silently about the house, and listening outside the doors of +rooms where the hands were working. He did not succeed in catching +anyone idling or smoking or talking. The nearest approach to what the +men called 'a capture' that he made was, as he stood outside the door +of one of the upper rooms in which Philpot and Harlow were working, he +heard them singing one of Sankey's hymns--'Work! for the night is +coming'. He listened to two verses and several repetitions of the +chorus. Being a 'Christian', he could scarcely object to this, +especially as by peeping through the partly open door he could see +that they were suiting the action to the word. When he went into the +room they glanced around to see who it was, and stopped singing. +Rushton did not speak, but stood in the middle of the floor, silently +watching them as they worked, for about a quarter of an hour. Then, +without having uttered a syllable, he turned and went out. + +They heard him softly descend the stairs, and Harlow, turning to +Philpot said in a hoarse whisper: + +'What do you think of the b--r, standing there watchin' us like that, +as if we was a couple of bloody convicts? If it wasn't that I've got +someone else beside myself to think of, I would 'ave sloshed the bloody +sod in the mouth with this pound brush!' + +'Yes; it does make yer feel like that, mate,' replied Philpot, 'but of +course we mustn't give way to it.' + +'Several times,' continued Harlow, who was livid with anger, 'I was on +the point of turnin' round and sayin' to 'im, "What the bloody 'ell do +you mean by standin' there and watchin' me, you bloody, psalm-singin' +swine?" It took me all my time to keep it in, I can tell you.' + +Meanwhile, Rushton was still going about the house, occasionally +standing and watching the other men in the same manner as he had +watched Philpot and Harlow. + +None of the men looked round from their work or spoke either to Rushton +or to each other. The only sounds heard were the noises made by the +saws and hammers of the carpenters who were fixing the frieze rails and +dado rails or repairing parts of the woodwork in some of the rooms. + +Crass placed himself in Rushton's way several times with the hope of +being spoken to, but beyond curtly acknowledging the 'foreman's' +servile 'Good hafternoon, sir,' the master took no notice of him. + +After about an hour spent in this manner Rushton went away, but as no +one saw him go, it was not until some considerable time after his +departure that they knew that he was gone. + +Owen was secretly very disappointed. 'I thought he had come to tell me +about the drawing-room,' he said to himself, 'but I suppose it's not +decided yet.' + +Just as the 'hands' were beginning to breathe freely again, Misery +arrived, carrying some rolled-up papers in his hand. He also flitted +silently from one room to another, peering round corners and listening +at doors in the hope of seeing or hearing something which would give +him an excuse for making an example of someone. Disappointed in this, +he presently crawled upstairs to the room where Owen was working and, +handing to him the roll of papers he had been carrying, said: + +'Mr Sweater had decided to 'ave this work done, so you can start on it +as soon as you like.' + +It is impossible to describe, without appearing to exaggerate, the +emotions experienced by Owen as he heard this announcement. For one +thing it meant that the work at this house would last longer than it +would otherwise have done; and it also meant that he would be paid for +the extra time he had spent on the drawings, besides having his wages +increased--for he was always paid an extra penny an hour when engaged +on special work, such as graining or sign-writing or work of the +present kind. But these considerations did not occur to him at the +moment at all, for to him it meant much more. Since his first +conversation on the subject with Rushton he had though of little else +than this work. + +In a sense he had been DOING it ever since. He had thought and planned +and altered the details of the work repeatedly. The colours for the +different parts had been selected and rejected and re-selected over and +over again. A keen desire to do the work had grown within him, but he +had scarcely allowed himself to hope that it would be done at all. His +face flushed slightly as he took the drawings from Hunter. + +'You can make a start on it tomorrow morning,' continued that +gentleman. 'I'll tell Crass to send someone else up 'ere to finish +this room.' + +'I shan't be able to commence tomorrow, because the ceiling and walls +will have to be painted first.' + +'Yes: I know. You and Easton can do that. One coat tomorrow, another +on Friday and the third on Saturday--that is, unless you can make it do +with two coats. Even if it has to be the three, you will be able to go +on with your decoratin' on Monday.' + +'I won't be able to start on Monday, because I shall have to make some +working drawings first.' + +'Workin' drorins!' ejaculated Misery with a puzzled expression. 'Wot +workin' drorins? You've got them, ain't yer?' pointing to the roll of +papers. + +'Yes: but as the same ornaments are repeated several times, I shall +have to make a number of full-sized drawings, with perforated outlines, +to transfer the design to the walls,' said Owen, and he proceeded to +laboriously explain the processes. + +Nimrod looked at him suspiciously. 'Is all that really necessary?' he +asked. 'Couldn't you just copy it on the wall, free-hand?' + +'No; that wouldn't do. It would take much longer that way.' + +This consideration appealed to Misery. + +'Ah, well,' he sighed. 'I s'pose you'll 'ave to do it the way you +said; but for goodness sake don't spend too much time over it, because +we've took it very cheap. We only took it on so as you could 'ave a +job, not that we expect to make any profit out of it.' + +'And I shall have to cut some stencils, so I shall need several sheets +of cartridge paper.' + +Upon hearing of this addition expense, Misery's long visage appeared to +become several inches longer; but after a moment's thought he +brightened up. + +'I'll tell you what!' he exclaimed with a cunning leer, 'there's lots +of odd rolls of wallpaper down at the shop. Couldn't you manage with +some of that?' + +'I'm afraid it wouldn't do,' replied Owen doubtfully, 'but I'll have a +look at it and if possible I'll use it.' + +'Yes, do!' said Misery, pleased at the thought of saving something. +'Call at the shop on your way home tonight, and we'll see what we can +find. 'Ow long do you think it'll take you to make the drorins and the +stencils?' + +'Well, today's Thursday. If you let someone else help Easton to get +the room ready, I think I can get them done in time to bring them with +me on Monday morning.' + +'Wot do yer mean, "bring them with you"?' demanded Nimrod. + +'I shall have to do them at home, you know.' + +'Do 'em at 'ome! Why can't you do 'em 'ere?' + +'Well, there's no table, for one thing.' + +'Oh, but we can soon fit you out with a table. You can 'ave a pair of +paperhanger's tressels and boards for that matter.' + +'I have a lot of sketches and things at home that I couldn't very well +bring here,' said Owen. + +Misery argued about it for a long time, insisting that the drawings +should be made either on the 'job' or at the paint-shop down at the +yard. How, he asked, was he to know at what hour Owen commenced or +left off working, if the latter did them at home? + +'I shan't charge any more time than I really work,' replied Owen. 'I +can't possibly do them here or at the paint-shop. I know I should only +make a mess of them under such conditions.' + +'Well, I s'pose you'll 'ave to 'ave your own way,' said Misery, +dolefully. 'I'll let Harlow help Easton paint the room out, so as you +can get your stencils and things ready. But for Gord's sake get 'em +done as quick as you can. If you could manage to get done by Friday +and come down and help Easton on Saturday, it would be so much the +better. And when you do get a start on the decoratin', I shouldn't +take too much care over it, you know, if I was you, because we 'ad to +take the job for next to nothing or Mr Sweater would never 'ave 'ad it +done at all!' + +Nimrod now began to crawl about the house, snarling and grumbling at +everyone. + +'Now then, you chaps. Rouse yourselves!' he bellowed, 'you seem to +think this is a 'orspital. If some of you don't make a better show +than this, I'll 'ave to 'ave a Alteration! There's plenty of chaps +walkin' about doin' nothin' who'll be only too glad of a job!' + +He went into the scullery, where Crass was mixing some colour. + +'Look 'ere, Crass!' he said. 'I'm not at all satisfied with the way +you're gettin' on with the work. You must push the chaps a bit more +than you're doin'. There's not enough being done, by a long way. We +shall lose money over this job before we're finished!' + +Crass--whose fat face had turned a ghastly green with fright--mumbled +something about getting on with it as fast as he could. + +'Well, you'll 'ave to make 'em move a bit quicker than this!' Misery +howled, 'or there'll 'ave to be a ALTERATION!' + +By an 'alteration' Crass understood that he might get the sack, or that +someone else might be put in charge of the job, and that would of +course reduce him to the ranks and do away with his chance of being +kept on longer than the others. He determined to try to ingratiate +himself with Hunter and appease his wrath by sacrificing someone else. +He glanced cautiously into the kitchen and up the passage and then, +lowering his voice, he said: + +'They all shapes pretty well, except Newman. I would 'ave told you +about 'im before, but I thought I'd give 'im a fair chance. I've spoke +to 'im several times myself about not doin' enough, but it don't seem +to make no difference.' + +'I've 'ad me eye on 'im meself for some time,' replied Nimrod in the +same tone. 'Anybody would think the work was goin' to be sent to a +Exhibition, the way 'e messes about with it, rubbing it with glasspaper +and stopping up every little crack! I can't understand where 'e gets +all the glasspaper FROM.' + +''E brings it 'isself!' said Crass hoarsely. 'I know for a fact that +'e bought two 'a'penny sheets of it, last week out of 'is own money!' + +'Oh, 'e did, did 'e?' snarled Misery. 'I'll give 'im glasspaper! I'll +'ave a Alteration!' + +He went into the hall, where he remained alone for a considerable time, +brooding. At last, with the manner of one who has resolved on a +certain course of action, he turned and entered the room where Philpot +and Harlow were working. + +'You both get sevenpence an hour, don't you?' he said. + +They both replied to the affirmative. + +'I've never worked under price yet,' added Harlow. + +'Nor me neither,' observed Philpot. + +'Well, of course you can please yourselves,' Hunter continued, 'but +after this week we've decided not to pay more than six and a half. +Things is cut so fine nowadays that we can't afford to go on payin' +sevenpence any longer. You can work up till tomorrow night on the old +terms, but if you're not willin' to accept six and a half you needn't +come on Saturday morning. Please yourselves. Take it or leave it.' + +Harlow and Philpot were both too much astonished to say anything in +reply to this cheerful announcement, and Hunter, with the final remark, +'You can think it over,' left them and went to deliver the same +ultimatum to all the other full-price men, who took it in the same way +as Philpot and Harlow had done. Crass and Owen were the only two whose +wages were not reduced. + +It will be remembered that Newman was one of those who were already +working for the reduced rate. Misery found him alone in one of the +upper rooms, to which he was giving the final coat. He was at his old +tricks. The woodwork of the cupboard be was doing was in a rather +damaged condition, and he was facing up the dents with white-lead putty +before painting it. He knew quite well that Hunter objected to any but +very large holes or cracks being stopped, and yet somehow or other he +could not scamp the work to the extent that he was ordered to; and so, +almost by stealth, he was in the habit of doing it--not properly but as +well as he dared. He even went to the length of occasionally buying a +few sheets of glasspaper with his own money, as Crass had told Hunter. +When the latter came into the room he stood with a sneer on his face, +watching Newman for about five minutes before he spoke. The workman +became very nervous and awkward under this scrutiny. + +'You can make out yer time-sheet and come to the office for yer money +at five o'clock,' said Nimrod at last. 'We shan't require your +valuable services no more after tonight.' + +Newman went white. + +'Why, what's wrong?' said he. 'What have I done?' + +'Oh, it's not wot you've DONE,' replied Misery. 'It's wot you've not +done. That's wot's wrong! You've not done enough, that's all!' And +without further parley he turned and went out. + +Newman stood in the darkening room feeling as if his heart had turned +to lead. There rose before his mind the picture of his home and +family. He could see them as they were at this very moment, the wife +probably just beginning to prepare the evening meal, and the children +setting the cups and saucers and other things on the kitchen table--a +noisy work, enlivened with many a frolic and childish dispute. Even +the two-year-old baby insisted on helping, although she always put +everything in the wrong place and made all sorts of funny mistakes. +They had all been so happy lately because they knew that he had work +that would last till nearly Christmas--if not longer. And now this had +happened--to plunge them back into the abyss of wretchedness from which +they had so recently escaped. They still owed several weeks' rent, and +were already so much in debt to the baker and the grocer that it was +hopeless to expect any further credit. + +'My God!' said Newman, realizing the almost utter hopelessness of the +chance of obtaining another 'job' and unconsciously speaking aloud. 'My +God! How can I tell them? What WILL become of us?' + +Having accomplished the objects of his visit, Hunter shortly afterwards +departed, possibly congratulating himself that he had not been hiding +his light under a bushel, but that he had set it upon a candlestick and +given light unto all that were within that house. + +As soon as they knew that he was gone, the men began to gather into +little groups, but in a little while they nearly all found themselves +in the kitchen, discussing the reduction. Sawkins and the other +'lightweights' remained at their work. Some of them got only fourpence +halfpenny--Sawkins was paid fivepence--so none of these were affected +by the change. The other two fresh hands--the journeymen--joined the +crowd in the kitchen, being anxious to conceal the fact that they had +agreed to accept the reduced rate before being 'taken on'. Owen also +was there, having heard the news from Philpot. + +There was a lot of furious talk. At first several of them spoke of +'chucking up', at once; but others were more prudent, for they knew +that if they did leave there were dozens of others who would be eager +to take their places. + +'After all, you know,' said Slyme, who had--stowed away somewhere at +the back of his head--an idea of presently starting business on his own +account: he was only waiting until he had saved enough money, 'after +all, there's something in what 'Unter says. It's very 'ard to get a +fair price for work nowadays. Things IS cut very fine.' + +'Yes! We know all about that!' shouted Harlow. 'And who the bloody +'ell is it cuts 'em? Why, sich b--rs as 'Unter and Rushton! If this +firm 'adn't cut this job so fine, some other firm would 'ave 'ad it for +more money. Rushton's cuttin' it fine didn't MAKE this job, did it? +It would 'ave been done just the same if they 'adn't tendered for it at +all! The only difference is that we should 'ave been workin' for some +other master.' + +'I don't believe the bloody job's cut fine at all!' said Philpot. + +'Rushton is a pal of Sweater's and they're both members of the Town +Council.' + +'That may be,' replied Slyme; 'but all the same I believe Sweater got +several other prices besides Rushton's--friend or no friend; and you +can't blame 'im: it's only business. But pr'aps Rushton got the +preference--Sweater may 'ave told 'im the others' prices.' + +'Yes, and a bloody fine lot of prices they was, too, if the truth was +known!' said Bundy. 'There was six other firms after this job to my +knowledge--Pushem and Sloggem, Bluffum and Doemdown, Dodger and +Scampit, Snatcham and Graball, Smeeriton and Leavit, Makehaste and +Sloggitt, and Gord only knows 'ow many more.' + +At this moment Newman came into the room. He looked so white and upset +that the others involuntarily paused in their conversation. + +'Well, what do YOU think of it?' asked Harlow. + +'Think of what?' said Newman. + +'Why, didn't 'Unter tell you?' cried several voices, whose owners +looked suspiciously at him. They thought--if Hunter had not spoken to +Newman, it must be because he was already working under price. There +had been a rumour going about the last few days to that effect. + +'Didn't Misery tell you? They're not goin' to pay more than six and a +half after this week.' + +'That's not what 'e said to me. 'E just told me to knock off. Said I +didn't do enough for 'em.' + +'Jesus Christ!' exclaimed Crass, pretending to be overcome with +surprise. + +Newman's account of what had transpired was listened to in gloomy +silence. 'Those who--a few minutes previously--had been talking loudly +of chucking up the job became filled with apprehension that they might +be served in the same manner as he had been. Crass was one of the +loudest in his expression of astonishment and indignation, but he +rather overdid it and only succeeded in confirming the secret suspicion +of the others that he had had something to do with Hunter's action. + +The result of the discussion was that they decided to submit to +Misery's terms for the time being, until they could see a chance of +getting work elsewhere. + +As Owen had to go to the office to see the wallpaper spoken of by +Hunter, he accompanied Newman when the latter went to get his wages. +Nimrod was waiting for them, and had the money ready in an envelope, +which he handed to Newman, who took it without speaking and went away. + +Misery had been rummaging amongst the old wallpapers, and had got out a +great heap of odd rolls, which he now submitted to Owen, but after +examining them the latter said that they were unsuitable for the +purpose, so after some argument Misery was compelled to sign an order +for some proper cartridge paper, which Owen obtained at a stationer's +on his way home. + +The next morning, when Misery went to the 'Cave', he was in a fearful +rage, and he kicked up a terrible row with Crass. He said that Mr +Rushton had been complaining of the lack of discipline on the job, and +he told Crass to tell all the hands that for the future singing in +working hours was strictly forbidden, and anyone caught breaking this +rule would be instantly dismissed. + +Several times during the following days Nimrod called at Owen's flat to +see how the work was progressing and to impress upon him the necessity +of not taking too much trouble over it. + + + +Chapter 17 + +The Rev. John Starr + + +'What time is it now, Mum?' asked Frankie as soon as he had finished +dinner on the following Sunday. + +'Two o'clock.' + +'Hooray! Only one more hour and Charley will be here! Oh, I wish it +was three o'clock now, don't you, Mother?' + +'No, dear, I don't. You're not dressed yet, you know.' + +Frankie made a grimace. + +'You're surely not going to make me wear my velvets, are you, Mum? +Can't I go just as I am, in my old clothes?' + +The 'velvets' was a brown suit of that material that Nora had made out +of the least worn parts of an old costume of her own. + +'Of course not: if you went as you are now, you'd have everyone staring +at you.' + +'Well, I suppose I'll have to put up with it,' said Frankie, resignedly. + +'And I think you'd better begin to dress me now, don't you?' + +'Oh, there's plenty of time yet; you'd only make yourself untidy and +then I should have the trouble all over again. Play with your toys a +little while, and when I've done the washing up I'll get you ready.' + +Frankie obeyed, and for about ten minutes his mother heard him in the +next room rummaging in the box where he stored his collection of +'things'. At the end of that time, however, he returned to the +kitchen. 'Is it time to dress me yet, Mum?' + +'No, dear, not yet. You needn't be afraid; you'll be ready in plenty +of time.' + +'But I can't help being afraid; you might forget.' + +'Oh, I shan't forget. There's lots of time.' + +'Well, you know, I should be much easier in my mind if you would dress +me now, because perhaps our clock's wrong, or p'r'aps when you begin +dressing me you'll find some buttons off or something, and then +there'll be a lot of time wasted sewing them on; or p'r'aps you won't +be able to find my clean stockings or something and then while you're +looking for it Charley might come, and if he sees I'm not ready he +mightn't wait for me.' + +'Oh, dear!' said Nora, pretending to be alarmed at this appalling list +of possibilities. 'I suppose it will be safer to dress you at once. +It's very evident you won't let me have much peace until it is done, +but mind when you're dressed you'll have to sit down quietly and wait +till he comes, because I don't want the trouble of dressing you twice.' + +'Oh, I don't mind sitting still,' returned Frankie, loftily. 'That's +very easy. + +'I don't mind having to take care of my clothes,' said Frankie as his +mother--having washed and dressed him, was putting the finishing +touches to his hair, brushing and combing and curling the long yellow +locks into ringlets round her fingers, 'the only thing I don't like is +having my hair done. You know all these curls are quite unnecessary. +I'm sure it would save you a lot of trouble if you wouldn't mind +cutting them off.' + +Nora did not answer: somehow or other she was unwilling to comply with +this often-repeated entreaty. It seemed to her that when this hair was +cut off the child would have become a different individual--more +separate and independent. + +'If you don't want to cut it off for your own sake, you might do it for +my sake, because I think it's the reason some of the big boys don't +want to play with me, and some of them shout after me and say I'm a +girl, and sometimes they sneak up behind me and pull it. Only +yesterday I had to have a fight with a boy for doing it: and even +Charley Linden laughs at me, and he's my best friend--except you and +Dad of course. + +'Why don't you cut it off, Mum?' + +'I am going to cut it as I promised you, after your next birthday.' + +'Then I shall be jolly glad when it comes. Won't you? Why, what's the +matter, Mum? What are you crying for?' Frankie was so concerned that +he began to cry also, wondering if he had done or said something wrong. +He kissed her repeatedly, stroking her face with his hand. What's the +matter, Mother?' + +'I was thinking that when you're over seven and you've had your hair +cut short you won't be a baby any more.' + +'Why, I'm not a baby now, am I? Here, look at this!' + +He strode over to the wall and, dragging out two chairs, he placed them +in the middle of the room, back to back, about fifteen inches apart, +and before his mother realized what he was doing he had climbed up and +stood with one leg on the back of each chair. + +'I should like to see a baby who could do this,' he cried, with his +face wet with tears. 'You needn't lift me down. I can get down by +myself. Babies can't do tricks like these or even wipe up the spoons +and forks or sweep the passage. But you needn't cut it off if you +don't want to. I'll bear it as long as you like. Only don't cry any +more, because it makes me miserable. If I cry when I fall down or when +you pull my hair when you're combing it you always tell me to bear it +like a man and not be a baby, and now you're crying yourself just +because I'm not a baby. You ought to be jolly glad that I'm nearly +grown up into a man, because you know I've promised to build you a +house with the money I earn, and then you needn't do no more work. +We'll have a servant the same as the people downstairs, and Dad can +stop at home and sit by the fire and read the paper or play with me and +Maud and have pillow fights and tell stories and--' + +'It's all right, dearie,' said Nora, kissing him. 'I'm not crying now, +and you mustn't either, or your eyes will be all red and you won't be +able to go with Charley at all.' + +When she had finished dressing him, Frankie sat for some time in +silence, apparently lost in thought. At last he said: + +'Why don't you get a baby, Mother? You could nurse it, and I could +have it to play with instead of going out in the street.' + +'We can't afford to keep a baby, dear. You know, even as it is, +sometimes we have to go without things we want because we haven't the +money to buy them. Babies need many things that cost lots of money.' + +'When I build our house when I'm a man, I'll take jolly good care not +to have a gas-stove in it. That's what runs away with all the money; +we're always putting pennies in the slot. And that reminds me: Charley +said I'll have to take a ha'penny to put in the mishnery box. Oh, dear, +I'm tired of sitting still. I wish he'd come. What time is it now, +Mother?' + +Before she could answer both Frankie's anxiety and the painful ordeal +of sitting still were terminated by the loud peal at the bell +announcing Charley's arrival, and Frankie, without troubling to observe +the usual formality of looking out of the window to see if it was a +runaway ring, had clattered half-way downstairs before he heard his +mother calling him to come back for the halfpenny; then he clattered up +again and then down again at such a rate and with so much noise as to +rouse the indignation of all the respectable people in the house. + +When he arrived at the bottom of the stairs he remembered that he had +omitted to say goodbye, and as it was too far to go up again he rang +the bell and then went into the middle of the road and looked up at the +window that Nora opened. + +'Goodbye, Mother,' he shouted. 'Tell Dad I forgot to say it before I +came down.' + +The School was not conducted in the chapel itself, but in a large +lecture hall under it. At one end was a small platform raised about +six inches from the floor; on this was a chair and a small table. A +number of groups of chairs and benches were arranged at intervals round +the sides and in the centre of the room, each group of seats +accommodating a separate class. On the walls--which were painted a +pale green--were a number of pictures: Moses striking the +Rock, the Israelites dancing round the Golden Calf, and so on. As the +reader is aware, Frankie had never been to a Sunday School of any kind +before, and he stood for a moment looking in at the door and half +afraid to enter. The lessons had already commenced, but the scholars +had not yet settled down to work. + +The scene was one of some disorder: some of the children talking, +laughing or playing, and the teachers alternately threatening and +coaxing them. The girls' and the very young children's classes were +presided over by ladies: the boys' teachers were men. + +The reader already has some slight knowledge of a few of these people. +There was Mr Didlum, Mr Sweater, Mr Rushton and Mr Hunter and Mrs +Starvem (Ruth Easton's former mistress). On this occasion, in addition +to the teachers and other officials of the Sunday School, there were +also present a considerable number of prettily dressed ladies and a few +gentlemen, who had come in the hope of meeting the Rev. John Starr, the +young clergyman who was going to be their minister for the next few +weeks during the absence of their regular shepherd, Mr Belcher, who was +going away for a holiday for the benefit of his health. Mr Belcher was +not suffering from any particular malady, but was merely 'run down', +and rumour had it that this condition had been brought about by the +rigorous asceticism of his life and his intense devotion to the arduous +labours of his holy calling. + +Mr Starr had conducted the service in the Shining Light Chapel that +morning, and a great sensation had been produced by the young +minister's earnest and eloquent address, which was of a very different +style from that of their regular minister. Although perhaps they had +not quite grasped the real significance of all that he had said, most +of them had been favourably impressed by the young clergyman's +appearance and manner in the morning: but that might have arisen from +prepossession and force of habit, for they were accustomed, as a matter +of course, to think well of any minister. There were, however, one or +two members of the congregation who were not without some misgivings +and doubts as to the soundness of his doctrines. Mr Starr had promised +that he would look in some time during the afternoon to say a few words +to the Sunday School children, and consequently on this particular +afternoon all the grown-ups were looking forward so eagerly to hearing +him again that not much was done in the way of lessons. Every time a +late arrival entered all eyes were directed towards the door in the +hope and expectation that it was he. + +When Frankie, standing at the door, saw all the people looking at him +he drew back timidly. + +'Come on, man,' said Charley. 'You needn't be afraid; it's not like a +weekday school; they can't do nothing to us, not even if we don't +behave ourselves. There's our class over in that corner and that's our +teacher, Mr Hunter. You can sit next to me. Come on!' + +Thus encouraged, Frankie followed Charley over to the class, and both +sat down. The teacher was so kind and spoke so gently to the children +that in a few minutes Frankie felt quite at home. + +When Hunter noticed how well cared for and well dressed he was he +thought the child must belong to well-to-do, respectable parents. +Frankie did not pay much attention to the lesson, for he was too much +interested in the pictures on the walls and in looking at the other +children. He also noticed a very fat man who was not teaching at all, +but drifted aimlessly about he room from one class to another. After a +time he came and stood by the class where Frankie was, and, after +nodding to Hunter, remained near, listening and smiling patronizingly +at the children. He was arrayed in a long garment of costly black +cloth, a sort of frock coat, and by the rotundity of his figure he +seemed to be one of those accustomed to sit in the chief places at +feasts. This was the Rev. Mr Belcher, minister of the Shining Light +Chapel. His short, thick neck was surrounded by a studless collar, and +apparently buttonless, being fastened in some mysterious way known only +to himself, and he showed no shirt front. + +The long garment beforementioned was unbuttoned and through the opening +there protruded a vast expanse of waistcoat and trousers, distended +almost to bursting by the huge globe of flesh they contained. A gold +watch-chain with a locket extended partly across the visible portion of +the envelope of the globe. He had very large feet which were carefully +encased in soft calfskin boots. If he had removed the long garment, +this individual would have resembled a balloon: the feet representing +the car and the small head that surmounted the globe, the safety valve; +as it was it did actually serve the purpose of a safety valve, the +owner being, in consequence of gross overfeeding and lack of natural +exercise, afflicted with chronic flatulence, which manifested itself in +frequent belchings forth through the mouth of the foul gases generated +in the stomach by the decomposition of the foods with which it was +generally loaded. But as the Rev. Mr Belcher had never been seen with +his coat off, no one ever noticed the resemblance. It was not +necessary for him to take his coat off: his part in life was not to +help to produce, but to help to devour the produce of the labour of +others. + +After exchanging a few words and grins with Hunter, he moved on to +another class, and presently Frankie with a feeling of awe noticed that +the confused murmuring sound that had hitherto pervaded the place was +hushed. The time allotted for lessons had expired, and the teachers +were quietly distributing hymn-books to the children. Meanwhile the +balloon had drifted up to the end of the hall and had ascended the +platform, where it remained stationary by the side of the table, +occasionally emitting puffs of gas through the safety valve. On the +table were several books, and also a pile of folded cards. These latter +were about six inches by three inches; there was some printing on the +outside: one of them was lying open on the table, showing the inside, +which was ruled and had money columns. + +Presently Mr Belcher reached out a flabby white hand and, taking up one +of the folded cards, he looked around upon the under-fed, ill-clad +children with a large, sweet, benevolent, fatherly smile, and then in a +drawling voice occasionally broken by explosions of flatulence, he said: + +'My dear children. This afternoon as I was standing near Brother +Hunter's class I heard him telling them of the wanderings of the +Children of Israel in the wilderness, and of all the wonderful things +that were done for them; and I thought how sad it was that they were so +ungrateful. + +'Now those ungrateful Israelites had received many things, but we have +even more cause to be grateful than they had, for we have received even +more abundantly than they did.' (Here the good man's voice was stilled +by a succession of explosions.) 'And I am sure,' he resumed, 'that +none of you would like to be even as those Israelites, ungrateful for +all the good things you have received. Oh, how thankful you should be +for having been made happy English children. Now, I am sure that you +are grateful and that you will all be very glad of an opportunity of +showing your gratitude by doing something in return. + +'Doubtless some of you have noticed the unseemly condition of the +interior of our Chapel. The flooring is broken in countless places. +the walls are sadly in need of cleansing and distempering, and they +also need cementing externally to keep out the draught. The seats and +benches and the chairs are also in a most unseemly condition and need +varnishing. + +'Now, therefore, after much earnest meditation and prayer, it has been +decided to open a Subscription List, and although times are very hard +just now, we believe we shall succeed in getting enough to have the +work done; so I want each one of you to take one of these cards and go +round to all your friends to see how much you can collect. It doesn't +matter how trifling the amounts are, because the smallest donations +will be thankfully received. + +'Now, I hope you will all do your very best. Ask everyone you know; do +not refrain from asking people because you think that they are too poor +to give a donation, but remind them that if they cannot give their +thousands they can give the widow's mite. Ask Everyone! First of all +ask those whom you feel certain will give: then ask all those whom you +think may possibly give: and, finally, ask all those whom you feel +certain will not give: and you will be surprised to find that many of +these last will donate abundantly. + +'If your friends are very poor and unable to give a large donation at +one time, a good plan would be to arrange to call upon them every +Saturday afternoon with your card to collect their donations. And +while you are asking others, do not forget to give what you can +yourselves. Just a little self-denial, and those pennies and +half-pennies which you so often spend on sweets and other unnecessary +things might be given--as a donation--to the good cause.' + +Here the holy man paused again, and there was a rumbling, gurgling +noise in the interior of the balloon, followed by several escapes of +gas through the safety valve. The paroxysm over, the apostle of +self-denial continued: + +'All those who wish to collect donations will stay behind for a few +minutes after school, when Brother Hunter--who has kindly consented to +act as secretary to the fund--will issue the cards. + +'I would like here to say a few words of thanks to Brother Hunter for +the great interest he has displayed in this matter, and for all the +trouble he is taking to help us to gather in the donations.' + +This tribute was well deserved; Hunter in fact had originated the whole +scheme in the hope of securing the job for Rushton & Co., and +two-and-a-half per cent of the profits for himself. + +Mr Belcher now replaced the collecting card on the table and, taking up +one of the hymn-books, gave out the words and afterwards conducted the +singing, flourishing one fat, flabby white hand in the air and holding +the book in the other. + +As the last strains of the music died away, he closed his eyes and a +sweet smile widened his mouth as he stretched forth his right hand, +open, palm down, with the fingers close together, and said: + +'Let us pray.' + +With much shuffling of feet everyone knelt down. Hunter's lanky form +was distributed over a very large area; his body lay along one of the +benches, his legs and feet sprawled over the floor, and his huge hands +clasped the sides of the seat. His eyes were tightly closed and an +expression of the most intense misery pervaded his long face. + +Mrs Starvem, being so fat that she knew if she once knelt down she +would never be able to get up again, compromised by sitting on the +extreme edge of her chair, resting her elbows on the back of the seat +in front of her, and burying her face in her hands. It was a very +large face, but her hands were capacious enough to receive it. + +In a seat at the back of the hall knelt a pale-faced, weary-looking +little woman about thirty-six years of age, very shabbily dressed, who +had come in during the singing. This was Mrs White, the caretaker, +Bert White's mother. When her husband died, the committee of the +Chapel, out of charity, gave her this work, for which they paid her six +shillings a week. Of course, they could not offer her full employment; +the idea was that she could get other work as well, charing and things +of that kind, and do the Chapel work in between. There wasn't much to +do: just the heating furnace to light when necessary; the Chapel, +committee rooms, classrooms and Sunday School to sweep and scrub out +occasionally; the hymn-books to collect, etc. Whenever they had a tea +meeting--which was on an average about twice a week--there were the +trestle tables to fix up, the chairs to arrange, the table to set out, +and then, supervised by Miss Didlum or some other lady, the tea to +make. There was rather a lot to do on the days following these +functions: the washing up, the tables and chairs to put away, the floor +to sweep, and so on; but the extra work was supposed to be compensated +by the cakes and broken victuals generally left over from the feast, +which were much appreciated as a welcome change from the bread and +dripping or margarine that constituted Mrs White's and Bert's usual +fare. + +There were several advantages attached to the position: the caretaker +became acquainted with the leading members and their wives, some of +who, out of charity, occasionally gave her a day's work as charwoman, +the wages being on about the same generous scale as those she earned at +the Chapel, sometimes supplemented by a parcel of broken victuals or +some castoff clothing. + +An evil-minded, worldly or unconverted person might possibly sum up the +matter thus: these people required this work done: they employed this +woman to do it, taking advantage of her poverty to impose upon her +conditions of price and labour that they would not have liked to endure +themselves. Although she worked very hard, early and late, the money +they paid her as wages was insufficient to enable her to provide +herself with the bare necessaries of life. Then her employers, being +good, kind, generous, Christian people, came to the rescue and bestowed +charity, in the form of cast-off clothing and broken victuals. + +Should any such evil-minded, worldly or unconverted persons happen to +read these lines, it is a sufficient answer to their impious and +malicious criticisms to say that no such thoughts ever entered the +simple mind of Mrs White herself: on the contrary, this very afternoon +as she knelt in the Chapel, wearing an old mantle that some years +previously had adorned the obese person of the saintly Mrs Starvem, her +heart was filled with gratitude towards her generous benefactors. + +During the prayer the door was softly opened: a gentleman in clerical +dress entered on tiptoe and knelt down next to Mr Didlum. He came in +very softly, but all the same most of those present heard him and +lifted their heads or peeped through their fingers to see who it was, +and when they recognized him a sound like a sigh swept through the hall. + +At the end of the prayer, amid groans and cries of 'Amen', the balloon +slowly descended from the platform, and collapsed into one of the +seats, and everyone rose up from the floor. When all were seated and +the shuffling, coughing and blowing of noses had ceased Mr Didlum stood +up and said: + +'Before we sing the closin' 'ymn, the gentleman hon my left, the Rev. +Mr John Starr, will say a few words.' + +An expectant murmur rippled through the hall. The ladies lifted their +eyebrows and nodded, smiled and whispered to each other; the gentlemen +assumed various attitudes and expressions; the children were very +quiet. Everyone was in a state of suppressed excitement as John Starr +rose from his seat and, stepping up on to the platform, stood by the +side of the table, facing them. + +He was about twenty-six years of age, tall and slenderly built. His +clean-cut, intellectual face, with its lofty forehead, and his air of +refinement and culture were in striking contrast to the coarse +appearance of the other adults in the room: the vulgar, ignorant, +uncultivated crowd of profit-mongers and hucksters in front of him. But +it was not merely his air of good breeding and the general comeliness +of his exterior that attracted and held one. There was an indefinable +something about him--an atmosphere of gentleness and love that seemed +to radiate from his whole being, almost compelling confidence and +affection from all those with whom he came in contact. As he stood +there facing the others with an inexpressibly winning smile upon his +comely face, it seemed impossible that there could be any fellowship +between him and them. + +There was nothing in his appearance to give anyone even an inkling of +the truth, which was: that he was there for the purpose of bolstering +up the characters of the despicable crew of sweaters and slave-drivers +who paid his wages. + +He did not give a very long address this afternoon--only just a Few +Words; but they were very precious, original and illuminating. He told +them of certain Thoughts that had occurred to his mind on his way there +that afternoon; and as they listened, Sweater, Rushton, Didlum, Hunter, +and the other disciples exchanged significant looks and gestures. Was +it not magnificent! Such power! Such reasoning! In fact, as they +afterwards modestly admitted to each other, it was so profound that +even they experienced great difficulty in fathoming the speaker's +meaning. + +As for the ladies, they were motionless and dumb with admiration. They +sat with flushed faces, shining eyes and palpitating hearts, looking +hungrily at the dear man as he proceeded: + +'Unfortunately, our time this afternoon does not permit us to dwell at +length upon these Thoughts. Perhaps at some future date we may have +the blessed privilege of so doing; but this afternoon I have been asked +to say a Few Words on another subject. The failing health of your dear +minister has for some time past engaged the anxious attention of the +congregation.' + +Sympathetic glances were directed towards the interesting invalid; the +ladies murmured, 'Poor dear!' and other expressions of anxious concern. + +'Although naturally robust,' continued Starr, 'long, continued +Overwork, the loving solicitude for Others that often prevented him +taking even necessary repose, and a too rigorous devotion to the +practice of Self-denial have at last brought about the inevitable +Breakdown, and rendered a period of Rest absolutely imperative.' + +The orator paused to take breath, and the silence that ensued was +disturbed only by faint rumblings in the interior of the ascetic victim +of overwork. + +'With this laudable object,' proceeded Starr, 'a Subscription List was +quietly opened about a month ago, and those dear children who had cards +and assisted in the good work of collecting donations will be pleased +to hear that altogether a goodly sum was gathered, but as it was not +quite enough, the committee voted a further amount out of the General +Fund, and at a special meeting held last Friday evening, your dear +Shepherd was presented with an illuminated address, and a purse of gold +sufficient to defray the expenses of a month's holiday in the South of +France. + +'Although, of course, he regrets being separated from you even for such +a brief period he feels that in going he is choosing the lesser of two +evils. It is better to go to the South of France for a month than to +continue Working in spite of the warnings of exhausted nature and +perhaps be taken away from you altogether--to Heaven.' + +'God forbid!' fervently ejaculated several disciples, and a ghastly +pallor overspread the features of the object of their prayers. + +'Even as it is there is a certain amount of danger. Let us hope and +pray for the best, but if the worst should happen and he is called upon +to Ascend, there will be some satisfaction in knowing that you have +done what you could to avert the dreadful calamity.' + +Here, probably as a precaution against the possibility of an +involuntary ascent, a large quantity of gas was permitted to escape +through the safety valve of the balloon. + +'He sets out on his pilgrimage tomorrow,' concluded Starr, 'and I am +sure he will be followed by the good wishes and prayers of all the +members of his flock.' + +The reverend gentleman resumed his seat, and almost immediately it +became evident from the oscillations of the balloon that Mr Belcher was +desirous of rising to say a Few Words in acknowledgement, but he was +restrained by the entreaties of those near him, who besought him not to +exhaust himself. He afterwards said that he would not have been able +to say much even if they had permitted him to speak, because he felt +too full. + +'During the absence of our beloved pastor,' said Brother Didlum, who +now rose to give out the closing hymn, 'his flock will not be left +hentirely without a shepherd, for we 'ave arranged with Mr Starr to +come and say a Few Words to us hevery Sunday.' + +From the manner in which they constantly referred to themselves, it +might have been thought that they were a flock of sheep instead of +being what they really were--a pack of wolves. + +When they heard Brother Didlum's announcement a murmur of intense +rapture rose from the ladies, and Mr Starr rolled his eyes and smiled +sweetly. Brother Didlum did not mention the details of the +'arrangement', to have done so at that time would have been most +unseemly, but the following extract from the accounts of the chapel +will not be out of place here: 'Paid to Rev. John Starr for Sunday, +Nov. 14--L4.4.0 per the treasurer.' It was not a large sum considering +the great services rendered by Mr Starr, but, small as it was, it is to +be feared that many worldly, unconverted persons will think it was far +too much to pay for a Few Words, even such wise words as Mr John +Starr's admittedly always were. But the Labourer is worthy of his hire. + +After the 'service' was over, most of the children, including Charley +and Frankie, remained to get collecting cards. Mr Starr was surrounded +by a crowd of admirers, and a little later, when he rode away with Mr +Belcher and Mr Sweater in the latter's motor car, the ladies looked +hungrily after that conveyance, listening to the melancholy 'pip, pip' +of its hooter and trying to console themselves with the reflection that +they would see him again in a few hours' time at the evening service. + + + +Chapter 18 + +The Lodger + + +In accordance with his arrangement with Hunter, Owen commenced the work +in the drawing-room on the Monday morning. Harlow and Easton were +distempering some of the ceilings, and about ten o'clock they went down +to the scullery to get some more whitewash. Crass was there as usual, +pretending to be very busy mixing colours. + +'Well, wot do you think of it?' he said as he served them with what +they required. + +'Think of what?' asked Easton. + +'Why, hour speshul hartist,' replied Crass with a sneer. 'Do you think +'e's goin' to get through with it?' + +'Shouldn't like to say,' replied Easton guardedly. + +'You know it's one thing to draw on a bit of paper and colour it with a +penny box of paints, and quite another thing to do it on a wall or +ceiling,' continued Crass. 'Ain't it?' + +'Yes; that's true enough,' said Harlow. + +'Do you believe they're 'is own designs?' Crass went on. + +'Be rather 'ard to tell,' remarked Easton, embarrassed. + +Neither Harlow nor Easton shared Crass's sentiments in this matter, but +at the same time they could not afford to offend him by sticking up for +Owen. + +'If you was to ast me, quietly,' Crass added, 'I should be more +inclined to say as 'e copied it all out of some book.' + +'That's just about the size of it, mate,' agreed Harlow. + +'It would be a bit of all right if 'e was to make a bloody mess of it, +wouldn't it?' Crass continued with a malignant leer. + +'Not arf!' said Harlow. + +When the two men regained the upper landing on which they were working +they exchanged significant glances and laughed quietly. Hearing these +half-suppressed sounds of merriment, Philpot, who was working alone in +a room close by, put his head out of the doorway. + +'Wot's the game?' he inquired in a low voice. + +'Ole Crass ain't arf wild about Owen doin' that room,' replied Harlow, +and repeated the substance of Crass's remarks. + +'It is a bit of a take-down for the bleeder, ain't it, 'avin' to play +second fiddle,' said Philpot with a delighted grin. + +''E's opin' Owen'll make a mess of it,' Easton whispered. + +'Well, 'e'll be disappointed, mate,' answered Philpot. 'I was workin' +along of Owen for Pushem and Sloggem about two year ago, and I seen 'im +do a job down at the Royal 'Otel--the smokin'-room ceilin' it was--and +I can tell you it looked a bloody treat!' + +'I've heard tell of it,' said Harlow. + +'There's no doubt Owen knows 'is work,' remarked Easton, 'although 'e +is a bit orf is onion about Socialism.' + +'I don't know so much about that, mate,' returned Philpot. 'I agree +with a lot that 'e ses. I've often thought the same things meself, but +I can't talk like 'im, 'cause I ain't got no 'ead for it.' + +'I agree with some of it too,' said Harlow with a laugh, 'but all the +same 'e does say some bloody silly things, you must admit. For +instance, that stuff about money bein' the cause of poverty.' + +'Yes. I can't exactly see that meself,' agreed Philpot. + +'We must tackle 'im about that at dinner-time,' said Harlow. 'I should +rather like to 'ear 'ow 'e makes it out.' + +'For Gord's sake don't go startin' no arguments at dinner-time,' said +Easton. 'Leave 'im alone when 'e is quiet.' + +'Yes; let's 'ave our dinner in peace, if possible,' said Philpot. +'Sh!!' he added, hoarsely, suddenly holding up his hand warningly. They +listened intently. It was evident from the creaking of the stairs that +someone was crawling up them. Philpot instantly disappeared. Harlow +lifted up the pail of whitewash and set it down again noisily. + +'I think we'd better 'ave the steps and the plank over this side, +Easton,' he said in a loud voice. + +'Yes. I think that'll be the best way,' replied Easton. + +While they were arranging their scaffold to do the ceiling Crass +arrived on the landing. He made no remark at first, but walked into +the room to see how many ceilings they had done. + +'You'd better look alive, you chaps, he said as he went downstairs +again. 'If we don't get these ceilings finished by dinner-time, +Nimrod's sure to ramp.' + +'All right,' said Harlow, gruffly. 'We'll bloody soon slosh 'em over.' + +'Slosh' was a very suitable word; very descriptive of the manner in +which the work was done. The cornices of the staircase ceilings were +enriched with plaster ornaments. These ceilings were supposed to have +been washed off, but as the men who were put to do that work had not +been allowed sufficient time to do it properly, the crevices of the +ornaments were still filled up with old whitewash, and by the time +Harlow and Easton had 'sloshed' a lot more whitewash on to them they +were mere formless unsightly lumps of plaster. The 'hands' who did the +'washing off' were not to blame. They had been hunted away from the +work before it was half done. + +While Harlow and Easton were distempering these ceilings, Philpot and +the other hands were proceeding with the painting in different parts of +the inside of the house, and Owen, assisted by Bert, was getting on +with the work in the drawing-room, striking chalk lines and measuring +and setting out the different panels. + +There were no 'political' arguments that day at dinner-time, to the +disappointment of Crass, who was still waiting for an opportunity to +produce the Obscurer cutting. After dinner, when the others had all +gone back to their work, Philpot unobtrusively returned to the kitchen +and gathered up the discarded paper wrappers in which some of the men +had brought their food. Spreading one of these open, he shook the +crumbs from the others upon it. In this way and by picking up +particles of bread from the floor, he collected a little pile of crumbs +and crusts. To these he added some fragments that he had left from his +own dinner. He then took the parcel upstairs and opening one of the +windows threw the crumbs on to the roof of the portico. He had +scarcely closed the window when two starlings fluttered down and began +to eat. Philpot watching them furtively from behind the shutter. The +afternoon passed uneventfully. From one till five seemed a very long +time to most of the hands, but to Owen and his mate, who were doing +something in which they were able to feel some interest and pleasure, +the time passed so rapidly that they both regretted the approach of +evening. + +'Other days,' remarked Bert, 'I always keeps on wishin' it was time to +go 'ome, but today seems to 'ave gorn like lightnin'!' + +After leaving off that night, all the men kept together till they +arrived down town, and then separated. Owen went by himself: Easton, +Philpot, Crass and Bundy adjourned to the 'Cricketers Arms' to have a +drink together before going home, and Slyme, who was a teetotaler, went +by himself, although he was now lodging with Easton. + +'Don't wait for me,' said the latter as he went off with Crass and the +others. 'I shall most likely catch you up before you get there.' + +'All right,' replied Slyme. + +This evening Slyme did not take the direct road home. He turned into +the main street, and, pausing before the window of a toy shop, examined +the articles displayed therein attentively. After some minutes he +appeared to have come to a decision, and entering the shop he purchased +a baby's rattle for fourpence halfpenny. It was a pretty toy made of +white bone and wool, with a number of little bells hanging +upon it, and a ring of white bone at the end of the handle. + +When he came out of the shop Slyme set out for home, this time walking +rapidly. When he entered the house Ruth was sitting by the fire with +the baby on her lap. She looked up with an expression of +disappointment as she perceived that he was alone. + +'Where's Will got to again?' she asked. + +'He's gone to 'ave a drink with some of the chaps. He said he wouldn't +be long,' replied Slyme as he put his food basket on the dresser and +went upstairs to his room to wash and to change his clothes. + +When he came down again, Easton had not yet arrived. + +'Everything's ready, except just to make the tea,' said Ruth, who was +evidently annoyed at the continued absence of Easton, 'so you may as +well have yours now.' + +'I'm in no hurry. I'll wait a little and see if he comes. He's sure +to be here soon.' + +'If you're sure you don't mind, I shall be glad if you will wait,' said +Ruth, 'because it will save me making two lots of tea.' + +They waited for about half an hour, talking at intervals in a +constrained, awkward way about trivial subjects. Then as Easton did +not come, Ruth decided to serve Slyme without waiting any longer. With +this intention she laid the baby in its cot, but the child resented +this arrangement and began to cry, so she had to hold him under her +left arm while she made the tea. Seeing her in this predicament, Slyme +exclaimed, holding out his hands: + +'Here, let me hold him while you do that.' + +'Will you?' said Ruth, who, in spite of her instinctive dislike of the +man, could not help feeling gratified with this attention. 'Well, mind +you don't let him fall.' + +But the instant Slyme took hold of the child it began to cry even +louder than it did when it was put into the cradle. + +'He's always like that with strangers,' apologized Ruth as she took him +back again. + +'Wait a minute,' said Slyme, 'I've got something upstairs in my pocket +that will keep him quiet. I'd forgotten all about it.' + +He went up to his room and presently returned with the rattle. When +the baby saw the bright colours and heard the tinkling of the bells he +crowed with delight, and reached out his hands eagerly towards it and +allowed Slyme to take him without a murmur of protest. Before Ruth had +finished making and serving the tea the man and child were on the very +best of terms with each other, so much so indeed that when Ruth had +finished and went to take him again, the baby seemed reluctant to part +from Slyme, who had been dancing him in the air and tickling him in the +most delightful way. + +Ruth, too, began to have a better opinion of Slyme, and felt inclined +to reproach herself for having taken such an unreasonable dislike of +him at first. He was evidently a very good sort of fellow after all. + +The baby had by this time discovered the use of the bone ring at the +end of the handle of the toy and was biting it energetically. + +'It's a very beautiful rattle,' said Ruth. 'Thank you very much for +it. It's just the very thing he wanted.' + +'I heard you say the other day that he wanted something of the kind to +bite on to help his teeth through,' answered Slyme, 'and when I +happened to notice that in the shop I remembered what you said and +thought I'd bring it home.' + +The baby took the ring out of its mouth and shaking the rattle +frantically in the air laughed and crowed merrily, looking at Slyme. + +'Dad! Dad! Dad!' he cried, holding out his arms. + +Slyme and Ruth burst out laughing. + +'That's not your Dad, you silly boy,' she said, kissing the child as +she spoke. 'Your dad ought to be ashamed of himself for staying out +like this. We'll give him dad, dad, dad, when he does come home, won't +we?' + +But the baby only shook the rattle and rang the bells and laughed and +crowed and laughed again, louder than ever. + + + +Chapter 19 + +The Filling of the Tank + + +Viewed from outside, the 'Cricketers Arms' was a pretentious-looking +building with plate-glass windows and a profusion of gilding. The +pilasters were painted in imitation of different marbles and the doors +grained to represent costly woods. There were panels containing +painted advertisements of wines and spirits and beer, written in gold, +and ornamented with gaudy colours. On the lintel over the principal +entrance was inscribed in small white letters: + +'A. Harpy. Licensed to sell wines, spirits and malt liquor by retail +to be consumed either on or off the premises.' + +The bar was arranged in the usual way, being divided into several +compartments. First there was the 'Saloon Bar': on the glass of the +door leading into this was fixed a printed bill: 'No four ale served in +this bar.' Next to the saloon bar was the jug and bottle department, +much appreciated by ladies who wished to indulge in a drop of gin on +the quiet. There were also two small 'private' bars, only capable of +holding two or three persons, where nothing less than fourpennyworth of +spirits or glasses of ale at threepence were served. Finally, the +public bar, the largest compartment of all. At each end, separating it +from the other departments, was a wooden partition, painted and +varnished. + +Wooden forms fixed across the partitions and against the walls under +the windows provided seating accommodation for the customers. A large +automatic musical instrument--a 'penny in the slot' +polyphone--resembling a grandfather's clock in shape--stood against one +of the partitions and close up to the counter, so that those behind the +bar could reach to wind it up. Hanging on the partition near the +polyphone was a board about fifteen inches square, over the surface of +which were distributed a number of small hooks, numbered. At the +bottom of the board was a net made of fine twine, extended by means of +a semi-circular piece of wire. In this net several india-rubber rings +about three inches in diameter were lying. There was no table in the +place but jutting out from the other partition was a hinged flap about +three feet long by twenty inches wide, which could be folded down when +not in use. This was the shove-ha'penny board. The coins--old French +pennies--used in playing this game were kept behind the bar and might +be borrowed on application. On the partition, just above the +shove-ha'penny board was a neatly printed notice, framed and glazed: + + NOTICE + + Gentlemen using this house are requested to + refrain from using obscene language. + +Alongside this notice were a number of gaudily- bills +advertising the local theatre and the music-hall, and another of a +travelling circus and menagerie, then visiting the town and encamped on +a piece of waste ground about half-way on the road to Windley. The +fittings behind the bar, and the counter, were of polished mahogany, +with silvered plate glass at the back of the shelves. On the shelves +were rows of bottles and cut-glass decanters, gin, whisky, brandy and +wines and liqueurs of different kinds. + +When Crass, Philpot, Easton and Bundy entered, the landlord, a +well-fed, prosperous-looking individual in white shirt-sleeves, and a +bright maroon fancy waistcoat with a massive gold watch-chain and a +diamond ring, was conversing in an affable, friendly way with one of +his regular customers, who was sitting on the end of the seat close to +the counter, a shabbily dressed, bleary-eyed, degraded, beer-sodden, +trembling wretch, who spent the greater part of every day, and all his +money, in this bar. He was a miserable-looking wreck of a man about +thirty years of age, supposed to be a carpenter, although he never +worked at that trade now. It was commonly said that some years +previously he had married a woman considerably his senior, the landlady +of a third-rate lodging-house. This business was evidently +sufficiently prosperous to enable him to exist without working and to +maintain himself in a condition of perpetual semi-intoxication. This +besotted wretch practically lived at the 'Cricketers'. He came +regularly very morning and sometimes earned a pint of beer by assisting +the barman to sweep up the sawdust or clean the windows. He usually +remained in the bar until closing time every night. He was a very good +customer; not only did he spend whatever money he could get hold of +himself, but he was the cause of others spending money, for he was +acquainted with most of the other regular customers, who, knowing his +impecunious condition, often stood him a drink 'for the good of the +house'. + +The only other occupant of the public bar--previous to the entrance of +Crass and his mates--was a semi-drunken man, who appeared to be a +house-painter, sitting on the form near the shove-ha'penny board. He +was wearing a battered bowler hat and the usual shabby clothes. This +individual had a very thin, pale face, with a large, high-bridged nose, +and bore a striking resemblance to the portraits of the first Duke of +Wellington. He was not a regular customer here, having dropped in +casually about two o'clock and had remained ever since. He was +beginning to show the effects of the drink he had taken during that +time. + +As Crass and the others came in they were hailed with enthusiasm by the +landlord and the Besotted Wretch, while the semi-drunk workman regarded +them with fishy eyes and stupid curiosity. + +'Wot cheer, Bob?' said the landlord, affably, addressing Crass, and +nodding familiarly to the others. ''Ow goes it?' + +'All reet me ole dear!' replied Crass, jovially. ''Ow's yerself?' + +'A.1,' replied the 'Old Dear', getting up from his chair in readiness +to execute their orders. + +'Well, wot's it to be?' inquired Philpot of the others generally. + +'Mine's a pint o' beer,' said Crass. + +'Half for me,' said Bundy. + +'Half o' beer for me too,' replied Easton. + +'That's one pint, two 'arves, and a pint o' porter for meself,' said +Philpot, turning and addressing the Old Dear. + +While the landlord was serving these drinks the Besotted Wretch +finished his beer and set the empty glass down on the counter, and +Philpot observing this, said to him: + +''Ave one along o' me?' + +'I don't mind if I do,' replied the other. + +When the drinks were served, Philpot, instead of paying for them, +winked significantly at the landlord, who nodded silently and +unobtrusively made an entry in an account book that was lying on one of +the shelves. Although it was only Monday and he had been at work all +the previous week, Philpot was already stony broke. This was accounted +for by the fact that on Saturday he had paid his landlady something on +account of the arrears of board and lodging money that had accumulated +while he was out of work; and he had also paid the Old Dear four +shillings for drinks obtained on tick during the last week. + +'Well, 'ere's the skin orf yer nose,' said Crass, nodding to Philpot, +and taking a long pull at the pint glass which the latter had handed to +him. + +Similar appropriate and friendly sentiments were expressed by the +others and suitably acknowledged by Philpot, the founder of the feast. + +The Old Dear now put a penny in the slot of the polyphone, and winding +it up started it playing. It was some unfamiliar tune, but when the +Semi-drunk Painter heard it he rose unsteadily to his feet and began +shuffling and dancing about, singing: + + 'Oh, we'll inwite you to the wedding, + An' we'll 'ave a glorious time! + Where the boys an' girls is a-dancing, + An' we'll all get drunk on wine.' + +''Ere! that's quite enough o' that!' cried the landlord, roughly. 'We +don't want that row 'ere.' + +The Semi-drunk stopped, and looking stupidly at the Old Dear, sank +abashed on to the seat again. + +'Well, we may as well sit as stand--for a few minutes,' remarked Crass, +suiting the action to the word. The others followed his example. + +At frequent intervals the bar was entered by fresh customers, most of +them working men on their way home, who ordered and drank their pint or +half-pint of ale or porter and left at once. Bundy began reading the +advertisement of the circus and menageries and a conversation ensued +concerning the wonderful performances of the trained animals. The Old +Dear said that some of them had as much sense as human beings, and the +manner with which he made this statement implied that he thought it was +a testimonial to the sagacity of the brutes. He further said that he +had heard--a little earlier in the evening--a rumour that one of the +wild animals, a bear or something, had broken loose and was at present +at large. This was what he had heard--he didn't know if it were true +or not. For his own part he didn't believe it, and his hearers agreed +that it was highly improbable. Nobody ever knew how these silly yarns +got about. + +Presently the Besotted Wretch got up and, taking the india-rubber rings +out of the net with a trembling hand, began throwing them one at a time +at the hooks on the board. The rest of the company watched him with +much interest, laughing when he made a very bad shot and applauding +when he scored. + +''E's a bit orf tonight,' remarked Philpot aside to Easton, 'but as a +rule 'e's a fair knockout at it. Throws a splendid ring.' + +The Semidrunk regarded the proceedings of the Besotted Wretch with an +expression of profound contempt. + +'You can't play for nuts,' he said scornfully. + +'Can't I? I can play you, anyway.' + +'Right you are! I'll play you for drinks round!' cried the Semi-drunk. + +For a moment the Besotted Wretch hesitated. He had not money enough to +pay for drinks round. However, feeling confident of winning, he +replied: + +'Come on then. What's it to be? Fifty up?' + +'Anything you like! Fifty or a 'undred or a bloody million!' + +'Better make it fifty for a start.' + +'All right!' + +'You play first if you like.' + +'All right,' agreed the Semi-drunk, anxious to distinguish himself. +Holding the six rings in his left hand, the man stood in the middle of +the floor at a distance of about three yards from the board, with his +right foot advanced. Taking one of the rings between the forefinger +and thumb of his right hand, and closing his left eye, he carefully +'sighted' the centre hook, No. 13; then he slowly extended his arm to +its full length in the direction of the board: then bending his elbow, +he brought his hand back again until it nearly touched his chin, and +slowly extended his arm again. He repeated these movements several +times, whilst the others watched with bated breath. Getting it right +at last he suddenly shot the ring at the board, but it did not go on +No. 13; it went over the partition into the private bar. + +This feat was greeted with a roar of laughter. The player stared at +the board in a dazed way, wondering what had become of the ring. When +someone in the next bar threw it over the partition again, he realized +what had happened and, turning to the company with a sickly smile, +remarked: + +'I ain't got properly used to this board yet: that's the reason of it.' + +He now began throwing the other rings at the board rather wildly, +without troubling to take aim. One struck the partition to the right +of the board: one to the left: one underneath: one went over the +counter, one on the floor, the other--the last--hit the board, and amid +a shout of applause, caught on the centre hook No. 13, the highest +number it was possible to score with a single throw. + +'I shall be all right now that I've got the range,' observed the +Semi-drunk as he made way for his opponent. + +'You'll see something now,' whispered Philpot to Easton. 'This bloke is +a dandy!' + +The Besotted Wretch took up his position and with an affectation of +carelessness began throwing the rings. It was really a remarkable +exhibition, for notwithstanding the fact that his hand trembled like +the proverbial aspen leaf, he succeeded in striking the board almost in +the centre every time; but somehow or other most of them failed to +catch on the hooks and fell into the net. When he finished his +innings, he had only scored 4, two of the rings having caught on the +No. 2 hook. + +''Ard lines,' remarked Bundy as he finished his beer and put the glass +down on the counter. + +'Drink up and 'ave another,' said Easton as he drained his own glass. + +'I don't mind if I do,' replied Crass, pouring what remained of the +pint down his throat. + +Philpot's glass had been empty for some time. + +'Same again,' said Easton, addressing the Old Dear and putting six +pennies on the counter. + +By this time the Semi-drunk had again opened fire on the board, but he +seemed to have lost the range, for none of the rings scored. + +They flew all over the place, and he finished his innings without +increasing his total. + +The Besotted Wretch now sailed in and speedily piled up 37. Then the +Semi-drunk had another go, and succeeded in getting 8. His case +appeared hopeless, but his opponent in his next innings seemed to go +all to pieces. Twice he missed the board altogether, and when he did +hit it he failed to score, until the very last throw, when he made 1. +Then the Semi-drunk went in again and got 10. + +The scores were now: + + Besotted Wretch ........................ 42 + Semi-drunk ............................. 31 + +So far it was impossible to foresee the end. It was anybody's game. +Crass became so excited that he absentmindedly opened his mouth and +shot his second pint down into his stomach with a single gulp, and +Bundy also drained his glass and called upon Philpot and Easton to +drink up and have another, which they accordingly did. + +While the Semi-drunk was having his next innings, the Besotted Wretch +placed a penny on the counter and called for a half a pint, which he +drank in the hope of steadying his nerves for a great effort. His +opponent meanwhile threw the rings at the board and missed it every +time, but all the same he scored, for one ring, after striking the +partition about a foot above the board, fell down and caught on the +hook. + +The other man now began his innings, playing very carefully, and nearly +every ring scored. As he played, the others uttered exclamations of +admiration and called out the result of every throw. + +'One!' + +'One again!' + +'Miss! No! Got 'im! Two!' + +'Miss!' + +'Miss!' + +'Four!' + +The Semi-drunk accepted his defeat with a good grace, and after +explaining that he was a bit out of practice, placed a shilling on the +counter and invited the company to give their orders. Everyone asked +for 'the same again,' but the landlord served Easton, Bundy and the +Besotted Wretch with pints instead of half-pints as before, so there +was no change out of the shilling. + +'You know, there's a great deal in not bein' used to the board,' said +the Semi-drunk. + +'There's no disgrace in bein' beat by a man like 'im, mate,' said +Philpot. ''E's a champion!' + +'Yes, there's no mistake about it. 'E throws a splendid ring!' said +Bundy. + +This was the general verdict. The Semi-drunk, though beaten, was not +disgraced: and he was so affected by the good feeling manifested by the +company that he presently produced a sixpence and insisted on paying +for another half-pint all round. + +Crass had gone outside during this conversation, but he returned in a +few minutes. 'I feel a bit easier now,' he remarked with a laugh as he +took the half-pint glass that the Semi-drunk passed to him with a +shaking hand. One after the other, within a few minutes, the rest +followed Crass's example, going outside and returning almost +immediately: and as Bundy, who was the last to return, came back he +exclaimed: + +'Let's 'ave a game of shove-'a'penny.' + +'All right,' said Easton, who was beginning to feel reckless. 'But +drink up first, and let's 'ave another.' + +He had only sevenpence left, just enough to pay for another pint for +Crass and half a pint for everyone else. + +The shove-ha'penny table was a planed mahogany board with a number of +parallel lines scored across it. The game is played by placing the +coin at the end of the board--the rim slightly overhanging the +edge--and striking it with the back part of the palm of the hand, +regulating the force of the blow according to the distance it is +desired to drive the coin. + +'What's become of Alf tonight?' inquired Philpot of the landlord whilst +Easton and Bundy were playing. Alf was the barman. + +''E's doing a bit of a job down in the cellar; some of the valves gone +a bit wrong. But the missus is comin' down to lend me a hand +presently. 'Ere she is now.' + +The landlady--who at this moment entered through the door at the back +of the bar--was a large woman with a highly- countenance and a +tremendous bust, incased in a black dress with a shot silk blouse. She +had several jewelled gold rings on the fingers of each fat white hand, +and a long gold watch guard hung round her fat neck. She greeted Crass +and Philpot with condescension, smiling affably upon them. + +Meantime the game of shove-ha'penny proceeded merrily, the Semi-drunk +taking a great interest in it and tendering advice to both players +impartially. Bundy was badly beaten, and then Easton suggested that it +was time to think of going home. This proposal--slightly modified--met +with general approval, the modification being suggested by Philpot, who +insisted on standing one final round of drinks before they went. + +While they were pouring this down their throats, Crass took a penny +from his waistcoat pocket and put it in the slot of the polyphone. The +landlord put a fresh disc into it and wound it up and it began to play +'The Boys of the Bulldog Breed.' The Semi-drunk happened to know the +words of the chorus of this song, and when he heard the music he +started unsteadily to his feet and with many fierce looks and gestures +began to roar at the top of his voice: + + 'They may build their ships, my lads, + And try to play the game, + But they can't build the boys of the Bulldog breed, + Wot made ole Hingland's--' + +''Ere! Stop that, will yer?' cried the Old Dear, fiercely. 'I told you +once before that I don't allow that sort of thing in my 'ouse!' + +The Semi-drunk stopped in confusion. + +'I don't mean no 'arm,' he said unsteadily, appealing to the company. + +'I don't want no chin from you!' said the Old Dear with a ferocious +scowl. 'If you want to make that row you can go somewheres else, and +the sooner you goes the better. You've been 'ere long enough.' + +This was true. The man had been there long enough to spend every penny +he had been possessed of when he first came: he had no money left now, +a fact that the observant and experienced landlord had divined some +time ago. He therefore wished to get rid of the fellow before the +drink affected him further and made him helplessly drunk. The +Semi-drunk listened with indignation and wrath to the landlord's +insulting words. + +'I shall go when the bloody 'ell I like!' he shouted. 'I shan't ask +you nor nobody else! Who the bloody 'ell are you? You're nobody! See? +Nobody! It's orf the likes of me that you gets your bloody livin'! I +shall stop 'ere as long as I bloody well like, and if you don't like it +you can go to 'ell!' + +'Oh! Yer will, will yer?' said the Old Dear. 'We'll soon see about +that.' And, opening the door at the back of the bar, he roared out: + +'Alf!' + +'Yes, sir,' replied a voice, evidently from the basement. + +'Just come up 'ere.' + +'All right,' replied the voice, and footsteps were heard ascending some +stairs. + +'You'll see some fun in a minute,' gleefully remarked Crass to Easton. + +The polyphone continued to play 'The Boys of the Bulldog Breed.' + +Philpot crossed over to the Semi-drunk. 'Look 'ere, old man,' he +whispered, 'take my tip and go 'ome quietly. You'll only git the worse +of it, you know.' + +'Not me, mate,' replied the other, shaking his head doggedly. ''Ere I +am, and 'ere I'm goin' to bloody well stop.' + +'No, you ain't,' replied Philpot coaxingly. ''Look 'ere. I'll tell you +wot we'll do. You 'ave just one more 'arf-pint along of me, and then +we'll both go 'ome together. I'll see you safe 'ome.' + +'See me safe 'ome! Wotcher mean?' indignantly demanded the other. 'Do +you think I'm drunk or wot?' + +'No. Certainly not,' replied Philpot, hastily. 'You're all right, as +right as I am myself. But you know wot I mean. Let's go 'ome. You +don't want to stop 'ere all night, do you?' + +By this time Alf had arrived at the door of the back of the bar. He +was a burly young man about twenty-two or twenty-three years of age. + +'Put it outside,' growled the landlord, indicating the culprit. + +The barman instantly vaulted over the counter, and, having opened wide +the door leading into the street, he turned to the half-drunken man +and, jerking his thumb in the direction of the door, said: + +'Are yer goin'?' + +'I'm goin' to 'ave 'arf a pint along of this genelman first--' + +'Yes. It's all right,' said Philpot to the landlord. 'Let's 'ave two +'arf-pints, and say no more about it.' + +'You mind your own business,' shouted the landlord, turning savagely on +him. ''E'll get no more 'ere! I don't want no drunken men in my +'ouse. Who asked you to interfere?' + +'Now then!' exclaimed the barman to the cause of the trouble, 'Outside!' + +'Not me!' said the Semi-drunk firmly. 'Not before I've 'ad my 'arf--' + +But before he could conclude, the barman had clutched him by the +collar, dragged him violently to the door and shot him into the middle +of the road, where he fell in a heap almost under the wheels of a +brewer's dray that happened to be passing. This accomplished, Alf shut +the door and retired behind the counter again. + +'Serve 'im bloody well right,' said Crass. + +'I couldn't 'elp laughin' when I seen 'im go flyin' through the bloody +door,' said Bundy. + +'You oughter 'ave more sense than to go interferin' like that,' said +Crass to Philpot. 'It was nothing to do with you.' + +Philpot made no reply. He was standing with his back to the others, +peeping out into the street over the top of the window casing. Then he +opened the door and went out into the street. Crass and the +others--through the window--watched him assist the Semi-drunk to his +feet and rub some of the dirt off his clothes, and presently after some +argument they saw the two go away together arm in arm. + +Crass and the others laughed, and returned to their half-finished +drinks. + +'Why, old Joe ain't drunk 'ardly 'arf of 'is!' cried Easton, seeing +Philpot's porter on the counter. 'Fancy going away like that!' + +'More fool 'im,' growled Crass. 'There was no need for it: the man's +all right.' + +The Besotted Wretch gulped his beer down as quickly as he could, with +his eyes fixed greedily on Philpot's glass. He had just finished his +own and was about to suggest that it was a pity to waste the porter +when Philpot unexpectedly reappeared. + +'Hullo! What 'ave you done with 'im?' inquired Crass. + +'I think 'e'll be all right,' replied Philpot. 'He wouldn't let me go +no further with 'im: said if I didn't go away, 'e'd go for me! But I +believe 'e'll be all right. I think the fall sobered 'im a bit.' + +'Oh, 'e's all right,' said Crass offhandedly. 'There's nothing the +matter with 'im.' + +Philpot now drank his porter, and bidding 'good night' to the Old Dear, +the landlady and the Besotted Wretch, they all set out for home. As +they went along the dark and lonely thoroughfare that led over the hill +to Windley, they heard from time to time the weird roaring of the wild +animals in the menagerie that was encamped in the adjacent field. Just +as they reached a very gloomy and deserted part, they suddenly observed +a dark object in the middle of the road some distance in front of them. +It seemed to be a large animal of some kind and was coming slowly and +stealthily towards them. + +They stopped, peering in a half-frightened way through the darkness. +The animal continued to approach. Bundy stooped down to the ground, +groping about in search of a stone, and--with the exception of Crass, +who was too frightened to move--the others followed his example. They +found several large stones and stood waiting for the creature--whatever +it was--to come a little nearer so as to get a fair shot at it. They +were about to let fly when the creature fell over on its side and +moaned as if in pain. Observing this, the four men advanced cautiously +towards it. Bundy struck a match and held it over the prostrate +figure. It was the Semi-drunk. + +After parting from Philpot, the poor wretch had managed to walk all +right for some distance. As Philpot had remarked, the fall had to some +extent sobered him; but he had not gone very far before the drink he +had taken began to affect him again and he had fallen down. Finding it +impossible to get up, he began crawling along on his hands and knees, +unconscious of the fact that he was travelling in the wrong direction. +Even this mode of progression failed him at last, and he would probably +have been run over if they had not found him. They raised him up, and +Philpot, exhorting him to 'pull himself together' inquired where he +lived. The man had sense enough left to be able to tell them his +address, which was fortunately at Windley, where they all resided. + +Bundy and Philpot took him home, separating from Crass and Easton at +the corner of the street where both the latter lived. + +Crass felt very full and satisfied with himself. He had had six and a +half pints of beer, and had listened to two selections on the polyphone +at a total cost of one penny. + +Easton had but a few yards to go before reaching his own house after +parting from Crass, but he paused directly he heard the latter's door +close, and leaning against a street lamp yielded to the feeling of +giddiness and nausea that he had been fighting against all the way +home. All the inanimate objects around him seemed to be in motion. The +lights of the distant street lamps appeared to be floating about the +pavement and the roadway rose and fell like the surface of a troubled +sea. He searched his pockets for his handkerchief and having found it +wiped his mouth, inwardly congratulating himself that Crass was not +there to see him. Resuming his walk, after a few minutes he reached +his own home. As he passed through, the gate closed of itself after +him, clanging loudly. He went rather unsteadily up the narrow path +that led to his front door and entered. + +The baby was asleep in the cradle. Slyme had gone up to his own room, +and Ruth was sitting sewing by the fireside. The table was still set +for two persons, for she had not yet taken her tea. + +Easton lurched in noisily. ''Ello, old girl!' he cried, throwing his +dinner basket carelessly on the floor with an affectation of joviality +and resting his hands on the table to support himself. 'I've come at +last, you see.' + +Ruth left off sewing, and, letting her hands fall into her lap, sat +looking at him. She had never seen him like this before. His face was +ghastly pale, the eyes bloodshot and red-rimmed, the lips tremulous and +moist, and the ends of the hair of his fair moustache, stuck together +with saliva and stained with beer, hung untidily round his mouth in +damp clusters. + +Perceiving that she did not speak or smile, Easton concluded that she +was angry and became grave himself. + +'I've come at last, you see, my dear; better late than never.' + +He found it very difficult to speak plainly, for his lips trembled and +refused to form the words. + +'I don't know so much about that,' said Ruth, inclined to cry and +trying not to let him see the pity she could not help feeling for him. +'A nice state you're in. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.' + +Easton shook his head and laughed foolishly. 'Don't be angry, Ruth. +It's no good, you know.' + +He walked clumsily towards her, still leaning on the table to steady +himself. + +'Don't be angry,' he mumbled as he stooped over her, putting his arm +round her neck and his face close to hers. 'It's no good being angry, +you know, dear.' + +She shrank away, shuddering with involuntary disgust as he pressed his +wet lips and filthy moustache upon her mouth. His fetid breath, foul +with the smell of tobacco and beer, and the odour of the stale tobacco +smoke that exuded from his clothes filled her with loathing. He kissed +her repeatedly and when at last he released her she hastily wiped her +face with her handkerchief and shivered. + +Easton said he did not want any tea, and went upstairs to bed almost +immediately. Ruth did not want any tea either now, although she had +been very hungry before he came home. She sat up very late, sewing, +and when at length she did go upstairs she found him lying on his back, +partly undressed on the outside of the bedclothes, with his mouth wide +open, breathing stertorously. + + + +Chapter 20 + +The Forty Thieves. The Battle: Brigands versus Bandits + + +This is an even more unusually dull and uninteresting chapter, and +introduces several matters that may appear to have nothing to do with +the case. The reader is nevertheless entreated to peruse it, because +it contains certain information necessary to an understanding of this +history. + +The town of Mugsborough was governed by a set of individuals called the +Municipal Council. Most of these 'representatives of the people' were +well-to-do or retired tradesmen. In the opinion of the inhabitants of +Mugsborough, the fact that a man had succeeded in accumulating money in +business was a clear demonstration of his fitness to be entrusted with +the business of the town. + +Consequently, when that very able and successful man of business Mr +George Rushton was put up for election to the Council he was returned +by a large majority of the votes of the working men who thought him an +ideal personage... + +These Brigands did just as they pleased. No one ever interfered with +them. They never consulted the ratepayers in any way. Even at +election time they did not trouble to hold meetings: each one of them +just issued a kind of manifesto setting forth his many noble qualities +and calling upon the people for their votes: and the latter never +failed to respond. They elected the same old crew time after time... + +The Brigands committed their depredations almost unhindered, for the +voters were engaged in the Battle of Life. Take the public park for +instance. Like so many swine around a trough--they were so busily +engaged in this battle that most of them had no time to go to the park, +or they might have noticed that there were not so many costly plants +there as there should have been. And if they had inquired further they +would have discovered that nearly all the members of the Town Council +had very fine gardens. There was reason for these gardens being so +grand, for the public park was systematically robbed of its best to +make them so. + +There was a lake in the park where large numbers of ducks and geese +were kept at the ratepayers' expense. In addition to the food provided +for these fowl with public money, visitors to the park used to bring +them bags of biscuits and bread crusts. When the ducks and geese were +nicely fattened the Brigands used to carry them off and devour them at +home. When they became tired of eating duck or goose, some of the +Councillors made arrangements with certain butchers and traded away the +birds for meat. + +One of the most energetic members of the Band was Mr Jeremiah Didlum, +the house-furnisher, who did a large hire system trade. He had an +extensive stock of second-hand furniture that he had resumed possession +of when the unfortunate would-be purchasers failed to pay the +instalments regularly. Other of the second-hand things had been +purchased for a fraction of their real value at Sheriff's sales or from +people whom misfortune or want of employment had reduced to the +necessity of selling their household possessions. + +Another notable member of the Band was Mr Amos Grinder, who had +practically monopolized the greengrocery trade and now owned nearly all +the fruiterers' shops in the town. As for the other shops, if they did +not buy their stocks from him--or, rather, the company of which he was +managing director and principal shareholder--if these other fruiterers +and greengrocers did not buy their stuff from his company, he tried to +smash them by opening branches in their immediate neighbourhood and +selling below cost. He was a self-made man: an example of what may be +accomplished by cunning and selfishness. + +Then there was the Chief of the Band--Mr Adam Sweater, the Mayor. He +was always the Chief, although he was not always Mayor, it being the +rule that the latter 'honour' should be enjoyed by all the members of +the Band in turn. A bright 'honour', forsooth! to be the first citizen +in a community composed for the most part of ignorant semi-imbeciles, +slaves, slave-drivers and psalm-singing hypocrites. Mr Sweater was the +managing director and principal shareholder of a large drapery business +in which he had amassed a considerable fortune. This was not very +surprising, considering that he paid none of his workpeople fair wages +and many of them no wages at all. He employed a great number of girls +and young women who were supposed to be learning dressmaking, +mantle-making or millinery. These were all indentured apprentices, +some of whom had paid premiums of from five to ten pounds. They were +'bound' for three years. For the first two years they received no +wages: the third year they got a shilling or eightpence a week. At the +end of the third year they usually got the sack, unless they were +willing to stay on as improvers at from three shillings to four and +sixpence per week. + +They worked from half past eight in the morning till eight at night, +with an interval of an hour for dinner, and at half past four they +ceased work for fifteen minutes for tea. This was provided by the +firm--half a pint for each girl, but they had to bring their own milk +and sugar and bread and butter. + +Few of the girls ever learned their trades thoroughly. Some were +taught to make sleeves; others cuffs or button-holes, and so on. The +result was that in a short time each one became very expert and quick +at one thing; and although their proficiency in this one thing would +never enable them to earn a decent living, it enabled Mr Sweater to +make money during the period of their apprenticeship, and that was all +he cared about. + +Occasionally a girl of intelligence and spirit would insist on the +fulfilment of the terms of her indentures, and sometimes the parents +would protest. If this were persisted in those girls got on better: +but even these were turned to good account by the wily Sweater, who +induced the best of them to remain after their time was up by paying +them what appeared--by contrast with the others girls' money--good +wages, sometimes even seven or eight shillings a week! and liberal +promises of future advancement. These girls then became a sort of +reserve who could be called up to crush any manifestation of discontent +on the part of the leading hands. + +The greater number of the girls, however, submitted tamely to the +conditions imposed upon them. They were too young to realize the wrong +that was being done them. As for their parents, it never occurred to +them to doubt the sincerity of so good a man as Mr Sweater, who was +always prominent in every good and charitable work. + +At the expiration of the girl's apprenticeship, if the parents +complained of her want of proficiency, the pious Sweater would +attribute it to idleness or incapacity, and as the people were +generally poor he seldom or never had any trouble with them. This was +how he fulfilled the unctuous promise made to the confiding parents at +the time the girl was handed over to his tender mercy--that he would +'make a woman of her'. + +This method of obtaining labour by false pretences and without payment, +which enabled him to produce costly articles for a mere fraction of the +price for which they were eventually sold, was adopted in other +departments of his business. He procured shop assistants of both sexes +on the same terms. A youth was indentured, usually for five years, to +be 'Made a Man of and 'Turned out fit to take a Position in any House'. +If possible, a premium, five, ten, or twenty pounds--according to their +circumstances--would be extracted from the parents. For the first +three years, no wages: after that, perhaps two or three shillings a +week. + +At the end of the five years the work of 'Making a Man of him' would be +completed. Mr Sweater would then congratulate him and assure him that +he was qualified to assume a 'position' in any House but regret that +there was no longer any room for him in his. Business was so bad. +Still, if the Man wished he might stay on until he secured a better +'position' and, as a matter of generosity, although he did not really +need the Man's services, he would pay him ten shillings per week! + +Provided he was not addicted to drinking, smoking, gambling or the +Stock Exchange, or going to theatres, the young man's future was thus +assured. Even if he were unsuccessful in his efforts to obtain another +position he could save a portion of his salary and eventually commence +business on his own account. + +However, the branch of Mr Sweater's business to which it is desired to +especially direct the reader's attention was the Homeworkers +Department. He employed a large number of women making ladies' +blouses, fancy aprons and children's pinafores. Most of these articles +were disposed of wholesale in London and elsewhere, but some were +retailed at 'Sweaters' Emporium' in Mugsborough and at the firm's other +retail establishments throughout the county. Many of the women workers +were widows with children, who were glad to obtain any employment that +did not take them away from their homes and families. + +The blouses were paid for at the rate of from two shillings to five +shillings a dozen, the women having to provide their own machine and +cotton, besides calling for and delivering the work. These poor women +were able to clear from six to eight shillings a week: and to earn even +that they had to work almost incessantly for fourteen or sixteen hours +a day. There was no time for cooking and very little to cook, for they +lived principally on bread and margarine and tea. Their homes were +squalid, their children half-starved and raggedly clothed in grotesque +garments hastily fashioned out of the cast-off clothes of charitable +neighbours. + +But it was not in vain that these women toiled every weary day until +exhaustion compelled them to cease. It was not in vain that they passed +their cheerless lives bending with aching shoulders over the thankless +work that barely brought them bread. It was not in vain that they and +their children went famished and in rags, for after all, the principal +object of their labour was accomplished: the Good Cause was advanced. +Mr Sweater waxed rich and increased in goods and respectability. + +Of course, none of those women were COMPELLED to engage in that +glorious cause. No one is compelled to accept any particular set of +conditions in a free country like this. Mr Trafaim--the manager of +Sweater's Homework Department--always put the matter before them in the +plainest, fairest possible way. There was the work: that was the +figure! And those who didn't like it could leave it. There was no +compulsion. + +Sometimes some perverse creature belonging to that numerous class who +are too lazy to work DID leave it! But as the manager said, there were +plenty of others who were only too glad to take it. In fact, such was +the enthusiasm amongst these women--especially such of them as had +little children to provide for--and such was their zeal for the Cause, +that some of them have been known to positively beg to be allowed to +work! + +By these and similar means Adam Sweater had contrived to lay up for +himself a large amount of treasure upon earth, besides attaining +undoubted respectability; for that he was respectable no one +questioned. He went to chapel twice every Sunday, his obese figure +arrayed in costly apparel, consisting--with other things--of grey +trousers, a long garment called a frock-coat, a tall silk hat, a +quantity of jewellery and a morocco-bound gilt-edged Bible. He was an +official of some sort of the Shining Light Chapel. His name appeared +in nearly every published list of charitable subscriptions. No +starving wretch had ever appealed to him in vain for a penny soup +ticket. + +Small wonder that when this good and public-spirited man offered his +services to the town--free of charge--the intelligent working men of +Mugsborough accepted his offer with enthusiastic applause. The fact +that he had made money in business was a proof of his intellectual +capacity. His much-advertised benevolence was a guarantee that his +abilities would be used to further not his own private interests, but +the interests of every section of the community, especially those of +the working classes, of whom the majority of his constituents was +composed. + +As for the shopkeepers, they were all so absorbed in their own +business--so busily engaged chasing their employees, adding up their +accounts, and dressing themselves up in feeble imitation of the +'Haristocracy'--that they were incapable of taking a really intelligent +interest in anything else. They thought of the Town Council as a kind +of Paradise reserved exclusively for jerry-builders and successful +tradesmen. Possibly, some day, if they succeeded in making money, they +might become town councillors themselves! but in the meantime public +affairs were no particular concern of theirs. So some of them voted +for Adam Sweater because he was a Liberal and some of them voted +against him for the same 'reason'. + +Now and then, when details of some unusually scandalous proceeding of +the Council's leaked out, the townspeople--roused for a brief space +from their customary indifference--would discuss the matter in a +casual, half-indignant, half-amused, helpless sort of way; but always +as if it were something that did not directly concern them. It was +during some such nine days' wonder that the title of 'The Forty +Thieves' was bestowed on the members of the Council by their +semi-imbecile constituents, who, not possessing sufficient intelligence +to devise means of punishing the culprits, affected to regard the +manoeuvres of the Brigands as a huge joke. + +There was only one member of the Council who did not belong to the +Band--Councillor Weakling, a retired physician; but unfortunately he +also was a respectable man. When he saw something going forwards that +he did not think was right, he protested and voted against it and +then--he collapsed! There was nothing of the low agitator about HIM. +As for the Brigands, they laughed at his protests and his vote did not +matter. + +With this one exception, the other members of the band were very +similar in character to Sweater, Rushton, Didlum and Grinder. They had +all joined the Band with the same objects, self-glorification and the +advancement of their private interests. These were the real reasons +why they besought the ratepayers to elect them to the Council, but of +course none of them ever admitted that such was the case. No! When +these noble-minded altruists offered their services to the town they +asked the people to believe that they were actuated by a desire to give +their time and abilities for the purpose of furthering the interests of +Others, which was much the same as asking them to believe that it is +possible for the leopard to change his spots. + + + +Owing to the extraordinary apathy of the other inhabitants, the +Brigands were able to carry out their depredations undisturbed. +Daylight robberies were of frequent occurrence. + +For many years these Brigands had looked with greedy eyes upon the huge +profits of the Gas Company. They thought it was a beastly shame that +those other bandits should be always raiding the town and getting clear +away with such rich spoils. + +At length--about two years ago--after much study and many private +consultations, a plan of campaign was evolved; a secret council of war +was held, presided over by Mr Sweater, and the Brigands formed +themselves into an association called 'The Mugsborough Electric Light +Supply and Installation Coy. Ltd.', and bound themselves by a solemn +oath to do their best to drive the Gas Works Bandits out of the town +and to capture the spoils at present enjoyed by the latter for +themselves. + +There was a large piece of ground, the property of the town, that was a +suitable site for the works; so in their character of directors of the +Electric Light Coy. they offered to buy this land from the +Municipality--or, in other words, from themselves--for about half its +value. + +At the meeting of the Town Council when this offer was considered, all +the members present, with the solitary exception of Dr Weakling, being +shareholders in the newly formed company, Councillor Rushton moved a +resolution in favour of accepting it. He said that every encouragement +should be given to the promoters of the Electric Light Coy., those +public-spirited citizens who had come forward and were willing to risk +their capital in an undertaking that would be a benefit to every class +of residents in the town that they all loved so well. (Applause.) +There could be no doubt that the introduction of the electric light +would be a great addition to the attractions of Mugsborough, but there +was another and more urgent reason that disposed him to do whatever he +could to encourage the Company to proceed with this work. +Unfortunately, as was usual at that time of the year (Mr Rushton's +voice trembled with emotion) the town was full of unemployed. (The +Mayor, Alderman Sweater, and all the other Councillors shook their +heads sadly; they were visibly affected.) There was no doubt that the +starting of that work at that time would be an inestimable boon to the +working-classes. As the representative of a working-class ward he was +in favour of accepting the offer of the Company. (Hear. Hear.) + +Councillor Didlum seconded. In his opinion, it would be nothing short +of a crime to oppose anything that would provide work for the +unemployed. + +Councillor Weakling moved that the offer be refused. (Shame.) He +admitted that the electric light would be an improvement to the town, +and in view of the existing distress he would be glad to see the work +started, but the price mentioned was altogether too low. It was not +more than half the value of the land. (Derisive laughter.) + +Councillor Grinder said he was astonished at the attitude taken up by +Councillor Weakling. In his (Grinder's) opinion it was disgraceful +that a member of the council should deliberately try to wreck a project +which would do so much towards relieving the unemployed. + +The Mayor, Alderman Sweater, said that he could not allow the amendment +to be discussed until it was seconded: if there were no seconder he +would put the original motion. + +There was no seconder, because everyone except Weakling was in favour +of the resolution, which was carried amid loud cheers, and the +representatives of the ratepayers proceeded to the consideration of the +next business. + +Councillor Didlum proposed that the duty on all coal brought into the +borough be raised from two shillings to three shillings per ton. + +Councillor Rushton seconded. The largest consumer of coal was the Gas +Coy., and, considering the great profits made by that company, they +were quite justified in increasing the duty to the highest figure the +Act permitted. + +After a feeble protest from Weakling, who said it would only increase +the price of gas and coal without interfering with the profits of the +Gas Coy., this was also carried, and after some other business had been +transacted, the Band dispersed. + +That meeting was held two years ago, and since that time the Electric +Light Works had been built and the war against the gasworks carried on +vigorously. After several encounters, in which they lost a few +customers and a portion of the public lighting, the Gasworks Bandits +retreated out of the town and entrenched themselves in a strong +position beyond the borough boundary, where they erected a number of +gasometers. They were thus enabled to pour gas into the town at long +range without having to pay the coal dues. + +This masterly stratagem created something like a panic in the ranks of +the Forty Thieves. At the end of two years they found themselves +exhausted with the protracted campaign, their movements hampered by a +lot of worn-out plant and antiquated machinery, and harassed on every +side by the lower charges of the Gas Coy. They were reluctantly +constrained to admit that the attempt to undermine the Gasworks was a +melancholy failure, and that the Mugsborough Electric Light and +Installation Coy. was a veritable white elephant. They began to ask +themselves what they should do with it; and some of them even urged +unconditional surrender, or an appeal to the arbitration of the +Bankruptcy Court. + +In the midst of all the confusion and demoralization there was, +however, one man who did not lose his presence of mind, who in this +dark hour of disaster remained calm and immovable, and like a vast +mountain of flesh reared his head above the storm, whose mighty +intellect perceived a way to turn this apparently hopeless defeat into +a glorious victory. That man was Adam Sweater, the Chief of the Band. + + + +Chapter 21 + +The Reign of Terror. The Great Money Trick + + +During the next four weeks the usual reign of terror continued at 'The +Cave'. The men slaved like so many convicts under the vigilant +surveillance of Crass, Misery and Rushton. No one felt free from +observation for a single moment. It happened frequently that a man who +was working alone--as he thought--on turning round would find Hunter or +Rushton standing behind him: or one would look up from his work to +catch sight of a face watching him through a door or a window or over +the banisters. If they happened to be working in a room on the ground +floor, or at a window on any floor, they knew that both Rushton and +Hunter were in the habit of hiding among the trees that surrounded the +house, and spying upon them thus. + +There was a plumber working outside repairing the guttering that ran +round the bottom edge of the roof. This poor wretch's life was a +perfect misery: he fancied he saw Hunter or Rushton in every bush. He +had two ladders to work from, and since these ladders had been in use +Misery had thought of a new way of spying on the men. Finding that he +never succeeded in catching anyone doing anything wrong when he entered +the house by one of the doors, Misery adopted the plan of crawling up +one of the ladders, getting in through one of the upper windows and +creeping softly downstairs and in and out of the rooms. Even then he +never caught anyone, but that did not matter, for he accomplished his +principal purpose--every man seemed afraid to cease working for even an +instant. + +The result of all this was, of course, that the work progressed rapidly +towards completion. The hands grumbled and cursed, but all the same +every man tore into it for all he was worth. Although he did next to +nothing himself, Crass watched and urged on the others. He was 'in +charge of the job': he knew that unless he succeeded in making this +work pay he would not be put in charge of another job. On the other +hand, if he did make it pay he would be given the preference over +others and be kept on as long as the firm had any work. The firm would +give him the preference only as long as it paid them to do so. + +As for the hands, each man knew that there was no chance of obtaining +work anywhere else at present; there were dozens of men out of +employment already. Besides, even if there had been a chance of getting +another job somewhere else, they knew that the conditions were more or +less the same on every firm. Some were even worse than this one. Each +man knew that unless he did as much as ever he could, Crass would +report him for being slow. They knew also that when the job began to +draw to a close the number of men employed upon it would be reduced, +and when that time came the hands who did the most work would be kept +on and the slower ones discharged. It was therefore in the hope of +being one of the favoured few that while inwardly cursing the rest for +'tearing into it', everyone as a matter of self-preservation went and +'tore into it' themselves. + +They all cursed Crass, but most of them would have been very glad to +change places with him: and if any one of them had been in his place +they would have been compelled to act in the same way--or lose the job. + +They all reviled Hunter, but most of them would have been glad to +change places with him also: and if any one of them had been in his +place they would have been compelled to do the same things, or lose the +job. + +They all hated and blamed Rushton. Yet if they had been in Rushton's +place they would have been compelled to adopt the same methods, or +become bankrupt: for it is obvious that the only way to compete +successfully against other employers who are sweaters is to be a +sweater yourself. Therefore no one who is an upholder of the present +system can consistently blame any of these men. Blame the system. + +If you, reader, had been one of the hands, would you have slogged? Or +would you have preferred to starve and see your family starve? If you +had been in Crass's place, would you have resigned rather than do such +dirty work? If you had had Hunter's berth, would you have given it up +and voluntarily reduced yourself to the level of the hands? If you had +been Rushton, would you rather have become bankrupt than treat your +'hands' and your customers in the same way as your competitors treated +theirs? It may be that, so placed, you--being the noble-minded paragon +that you are--would have behaved unselfishly. But no one has any right +to expect you to sacrifice yourself for the benefit of other people who +would only call you a fool for your pains. It may be true that if any +one of the hands--Owen, for instance--had been an employer of labour, +he would have done the same as other employers. Some people seem to +think that proves that the present system is all right! But really it +only proves that the present system compels selfishness. One must +either trample upon others or be trampled upon oneself. Happiness +might be possible if everyone were unselfish; if everyone thought of +the welfare of his neighbour before thinking of his own. But as there +is only a very small percentage of such unselfish people in the world, +the present system has made the earth into a sort of hell. Under the +present system there is not sufficient of anything for everyone to have +enough. Consequently there is a fight--called by Christians the +'Battle of Life'. In this fight some get more than they need, some +barely enough, some very little, and some none at all. The more +aggressive, cunning, unfeeling and selfish you are the better it will +be for you. As long as this 'Battle of Life' System endures, we have +no right to blame other people for doing the same things that we are +ourselves compelled to do. Blame the system. + +But that IS just what the hands did not do. They blamed each other; +they blamed Crass, and Hunter, and Rushton, but with the Great System +of which they were all more or less the victims they were quite +content, being persuaded that it was the only one possible and the best +that human wisdom could devise. The reason why they all believed this +was because not one of them had ever troubled to inquire whether it +would not be possible to order things differently. They were content +with the present system. If they had not been content they would have +been anxious to find some way to alter it. But they had never taken +the trouble to seriously inquire whether it was possible to find some +better way, and although they all knew in a hazy fashion that other +methods of managing the affairs of the world had already been proposed, +they neglected to inquire whether these other methods were possible or +practicable, and they were ready and willing to oppose with ignorant +ridicule or brutal force any man who was foolish or quixotic enough to +try to explain to them the details of what he thought was a better way. +They accepted the present system in the same way as they accepted the +alternating seasons. They knew that there was spring and summer and +autumn and winter. As to how these different seasons came to be, or +what caused them, they hadn't the remotest notion, and it is extremely +doubtful whether the question had ever occurred to any of them: but +there is no doubt whatever about the fact that none of them knew. From +their infancy they had been trained to distrust their own intelligence, +and to leave the management of the affairs of the world--and for that +matter of the next world too--to their betters; and now most of them +were absolutely incapable of thinking of any abstract subject whatever. +Nearly all their betters--that is, the people who do nothing--were +unanimous in agreeing that the present system is a very good one and +that it is impossible to alter or improve it. Therefore Crass and his +mates, although they knew nothing whatever about it themselves, +accepted it as an established, incontrovertible fact that the existing +state of things is immutable. They believed it because someone else +told them so. They would have believed anything: on one +condition--namely, that they were told to believe it by their betters. +They said it was surely not for the Like of Them to think that they +knew better than those who were more educated and had plenty of time to +study. + +As the work in the drawing-room proceeded, Crass abandoned the hope +that Owen was going to make a mess of it. Some of the rooms upstairs +being now ready for papering, Slyme was started on that work, Bert +being taken away from Owen to assist Slyme as paste boy, and it was +arranged that Crass should help Owen whenever he needed someone to lend +him a hand. + +Sweater came frequently during these four weeks, being interested in +the progress of the work. On these occasions Crass always managed to +be present in the drawing-room and did most of the talking. Owen was +very satisfied with this arrangement, for he was always ill at ease +when conversing with a man like Sweater, who spoke in an offensively +patronizing way and expected common people to kowtow to and 'Sir' him +at every second word. Crass however, seemed to enjoy doing that kind +of thing. He did not exactly grovel on the floor, when Sweater spoke +to him, but he contrived to convey the impression that he was willing +to do so if desired. + +Outside the house Bundy and his mates had dug deep trenches in the damp +ground in which they were laying new drains. This work, like that of +the painting of the inside of the house, was nearly completed. It was a +miserable job. Owing to the fact that there had been a spell of bad +weather the ground was sodden with rain and there was mud everywhere, +the men's clothing and boots being caked with it. But the worst thing +about the job was the smell. For years the old drain-pipes had been +defective and leaky. The ground a few feet below the surface was +saturated with fetid moisture and a stench as of a thousand putrefying +corpse emanated from the opened earth. The clothing of the men who +were working in the trenches became saturated with this fearful odour, +and for that matter, so did the men themselves. + +They said they could smell and taste it all the time, even when they +were away from the work at home, and when they were at meals. Although +they smoked their pipes all the time they were at work, Misery having +ungraciously given them permission, several times Bundy and one or +other of his mates were attacked with fits of vomiting. + +But, as they began to realize that the finish of the job was in sight, +a kind of panic seized upon the hands, especially those who had been +taken on last and who would therefore be the first to be 'stood still'. +Easton, however, felt pretty confident that Crass would do his best to +get him kept on till the end of the job, for they had become quite +chummy lately, usually spending a few evenings together at the +Cricketers every week. + +'There'll be a bloody slaughter 'ere soon,' remarked Harlow to Philpot +one day as they were painting the banisters of the staircase. 'I +reckon next week will about finish the inside.' + +'And the outside ain't goin' to take very long, you know,' replied +Philpot. + +'They ain't got no other work in, have they?' + +'Not that I knows of,' replied Philpot gloomily; 'and I don't think +anyone else has either.' + +'You know that little place they call the "Kiosk" down the Grand +Parade, near the bandstand,' asked Harlow after a pause. + +'Where they used to sell refreshments?' + +'Yes; it belongs to the Corporation, you know.' + +'It's been closed up lately, ain't it?' + +'Yes; the people who 'ad it couldn't make it pay; but I 'eard last +night that Grinder the fruit-merchant is goin' to open it again. If +it's true, there'll be a bit of a job there for someone, because it'll +'ave to be done up.' + +'Well, I hope it does come orf replied Philpot. 'It'll be a job for +some poor b--rs.' + +'I wonder if they've started anyone yet on the venetian blinds for this +'ouse?' remarked Easton after a pause. + +'I don't know,' replied Philpot. + +They relapsed into silence for a while. + +'I wonder what time it is?' said Philpot at length. 'I don't know 'ow +you feel, but I begin to want my dinner.' + +'That's just what I was thinking; it can't be very far off it now. It's +nearly 'arf an hour since Bert went down to make the tea. It seems a +'ell of a long morning to me.' + +'So it does to me,' said Philpot; 'slip upstairs and ask Slyme what +time it is.' + +Harlow laid his brush across the top of his paint-pot and went +upstairs. He was wearing a pair of cloth slippers, and walked softly, +not wishing that Crass should hear him leaving his work, so it happened +that without any intention of spying on Slyme, Harlow reached the door +of the room in which the former was working without being heard and, +entering suddenly, surprised Slyme--who was standing near the +fireplace--in the act of breaking a whole roll of wallpaper across his +knee as one might break a stick. On the floor beside him was what had +been another roll, now broken into two pieces. When Harlow came in, +Slyme started, and his face became crimson with confusion. He hastily +gathered the broken rolls together and, stooping down, thrust the +pieces up the flue of the grate and closed the register. + +'Wot's the bloody game?' inquired Harlow. + +Slyme laughed with an affectation of carelessness, but his hands +trembled and his face was now very pale. + +'We must get our own back somehow, you know, Fred,' he said. + +Harlow did not reply. He did not understand. After puzzling over it +for a few minutes, he gave it up. + +'What's the time?' he asked. + +'Fifteen minutes to twelve,' said Slyme and added, as Harlow was going +away: 'Don't mention anything about that paper to Crass or any of the +others.' + +'I shan't say nothing,' replied Harlow. + +Gradually, as he pondered over it, Harlow began to comprehend the +meaning of the destruction of the two rolls of paper. Slyme was doing +the paperhanging piecework--so much for each roll hung. Four of the +rooms upstairs had been done with the same pattern, and Hunter--who was +not over-skilful in such matters--had evidently sent more paper than +was necessary. By getting rid of these two rolls, Slyme would be able +to make it appear that he had hung two rolls more than was really the +case. He had broken the rolls so as to be able to take them away from +the house without being detected, and he had hidden them up the chimney +until he got an opportunity of so doing. Harlow had just arrived at +this solution of the problem when, hearing the lower flight of stairs +creaking, he peeped over and observed Misery crawling up. He had come +to see if anyone had stopped work before the proper time. Passing the +two workmen without speaking, he ascended to the next floor, and +entered the room where Slyme was. + +'You'd better not do this room yet,' said Hunter. 'There's to be a new +grate and mantelpiece put in.' + +He crossed over to the fireplace and stood looking at it thoughtfully +for a few minutes. + +'It's not a bad little grate, you know, is it?' he remarked. 'We'll be +able to use it somewhere or other.' + +'Yes; it's all right,' said Slyme, whose heart was beating like a +steam-hammer. + +'Do for a front room in a cottage,' continued Misery, stooping down to +examine it more closely. 'There's nothing broke that I can see.' + +He put his hand against the register and vainly tried to push it open. +'H'm, there's something wrong 'ere,' he remarked, pushing harder. + +'Most likely a brick or some plaster fallen down,' gasped Slyme, coming +to Misery's assistance. 'Shall I try to open it?' + +'Don't trouble,' replied Nimrod, rising to his feet. 'It's most likely +what you say. I'll see that the new grate is sent up after dinner. +Bundy can fix it this afternoon and then you can go on papering as soon +as you like.' + +With this, Misery went out of the room, downstairs and away from the +house, and Slyme wiped the sweat from his forehead with his +handkerchief. Then he knelt down and, opening the register, he took +out the broken rolls of paper and hid them up the chimney of the next +room. While he was doing this the sound of Crass's whistle shrilled +through the house. + +'Thank Gord!' exclaimed Philpot fervently as he laid his brushes on the +top of his pot and joined in the general rush to the kitchen. The +scene here is already familiar to the reader. For seats, the two pairs +of steps laid on their sides parallel to each other, about eight feet +apart and at right angles to the fireplace, with the long plank placed +across; and the upturned pails and the drawers of the dresser. The +floor unswept and littered with dirt, scraps of paper, bits of plaster, +pieces of lead pipe and dried mud; and in the midst, the steaming +bucket of stewed tea and the collection of cracked cups, jam-jam and +condensed milk tins. And on the seats the men in their shabby and in +some cases ragged clothing sitting and eating their coarse food and +cracking jokes. + +It was a pathetic and wonderful and at the same time a despicable +spectacle. Pathetic that human beings should be condemned to spend the +greater part of their lives amid such surroundings, because it must be +remembered that most of their time was spent on some job or other. +When 'The Cave' was finished they would go to some similar 'job', if +they were lucky enough to find one. Wonderful, because although they +knew that they did more than their fair share of the great work of +producing the necessaries and comforts of life, they did not think they +were entitled to a fair share of the good things they helped to create! +And despicable, because although they saw their children condemned to +the same life of degradation, hard labour and privation, yet they +refused to help to bring about a better state of affairs. Most of them +thought that what had been good enough for themselves was good enough +for their children. + +It seemed as if they regarded their own children with a kind of +contempt, as being only fit to grow up to be the servants of the +children of such people as Rushton and Sweater. But it must be +remembered that they had been taught self-contempt when they were +children. In the so-called 'Christian' schools they attended then +they were taught to 'order themselves lowly and reverently towards +their betters', and they were now actually sending their own children +to learn the same degrading lessons in their turn! They had a vast +amount of consideration for their betters, and for the children of +their betters, but very little for their own children, for each other, +or for themselves. + +That was why they sat there in their rags and ate their coarse food, +and cracked their coarser jokes, and drank the dreadful tea, and were +content! So long as they had Plenty of Work and plenty +of--Something--to eat, and somebody else's cast-off clothes to wear, +they were content! And they were proud of it. They gloried in it. +They agreed and assured each other that the good things of life were +not intended for the 'Likes of them', or their children. + +'Wot's become of the Professor?' asked the gentleman who sat on the +upturned pail in the corner, referring to Owen, who had not yet come +down from his work. + +'P'raps 'e's preparing 'is sermon,' remarked Harlow with a laugh. + +'We ain't 'ad no lectures from 'im lately, since 'e's been on that +room,' observed Easton. ''Ave we?' + +'Dam good job too!' exclaimed Sawkins. 'It gives me the pip to 'ear +'im, the same old thing over and over again.' + +'Poor ole Frank,' remarked Harlow. ''E does upset 'isself about +things, don't 'e?' + +'More fool 'im!' said Bundy. 'I'll take bloody good care I don't go +worryin' myself to death like 'e's doin', about such dam rot as that.' + +'I do believe that's wot makes 'im look so bad as 'e does,' observed +Harlow. 'Several times this morning I couldn't help noticing the way +'e kept on coughing.' + +'I thought 'e seemed to be a bit better lately,' Philpot observed; +'more cheerful and happier like, and more inclined for a bit of fun.' + +'He's a funny sort of chap, ain't he?' said Bundy. 'One day quite +jolly, singing and cracking jokes and tellin' yarns, and the next you +can't hardly get a word out of 'im.' + +'Bloody rot, I call it,' chimed in the man on the pail. 'Wot the +'ell's the use of the likes of us troublin' our 'eads about politics?' + +'Oh, I don't see that.' replied Harlow. 'We've got votes and we're +really the people what control the affairs of the country, so I reckon +we ought to take SOME interest in it, but at the same time I can't see +no sense in this 'ere Socialist wangle that Owen's always talkin' +about.' + +'Nor nobody else neither,' said Crass with a jeering laugh. + +'Even if all the bloody money in the world WAS divided out equal,' said +the man on the pail, profoundly, 'it wouldn't do no good! In six +months' time it would be all back in the same 'ands again.' + +'Of course,' said everybody. + +'But 'e 'ad a cuff the other day about money bein' no good at all!' +observed Easton. 'Don't you remember 'e said as money was the +principal cause of poverty?' + +'So it is the principal cause of poverty,' said Owen, who entered at +that moment. + +'Hooray!' shouted Philpot, leading off a cheer which the others took +up. 'The Professor 'as arrived and will now proceed to say a few +remarks.' + +A roar of merriment greeted this sally. + +'Let's 'ave our bloody dinner first, for Christ's sake,' appealed +Harlow, with mock despair. + +As Owen, having filled his cup with tea, sat down in his usual place, +Philpot rose solemnly to his feet, and, looking round the company, said: + +'Genelmen, with your kind permission, as soon as the Professor 'as +finished 'is dinner 'e will deliver 'is well-known lecture, entitled, +"Money the Principal Cause of being 'ard up", proving as money ain't no +good to nobody. At the hend of the lecture a collection will be took +up to provide the lecturer with a little encouragement.' Philpot +resumed his seat amid cheers. + +As soon as they had finished eating, some of the men began to make +remarks about the lecture, but Owen only laughed and went on reading +the piece of newspaper that his dinner had been wrapped in. Usually +most of the men went out for a walk after dinner, but as it happened to +be raining that day they were determined, if possible, to make Owen +fulfill the engagement made in his name by Philpot. + +'Let's 'oot 'im,' said Harlow, and the suggestion was at once acted +upon; howls, groans and catcalls filled the air, mingled with cries of +'Fraud!' 'Imposter!' 'Give us our money back!' 'Let's wreck the 'all!' +and so on. + +'Come on 'ere,' cried Philpot, putting his hand on Owen's shoulder. +'Prove that money is the cause of poverty.' + +'It's one thing to say it and another to prove it,' sneered Crass, who +was anxious for an opportunity to produce the long-deferred Obscurer +cutting. + +'Money IS the real cause of poverty,' said Owen. + +'Prove it,' repeated Crass. + +'Money is the cause of poverty because it is the device by which those +who are too lazy to work are enabled to rob the workers of the fruits +of their labours.' + +'Prove it,' said Crass. + +Owen slowly folded up the piece of newspaper he had been reading and +put it into his pocket. + +'All right,' he replied. 'I'll show you how the Great Money Trick is +worked.' + +Owen opened his dinner basket and took from it two slices of bread but +as these were not sufficient, he requested that anyone who had some +bread left would give it to him. They gave him several pieces, which +he placed in a heap on a clean piece of paper, and, having borrowed the +pocket knives they used to cut and eat their dinners with from Easton, +Harlow and Philpot, he addressed them as follows: + +'These pieces of bread represent the raw materials which exist +naturally in and on the earth for the use of mankind; they were not +made by any human being, but were created by the Great Spirit for the +benefit and sustenance of all, the same as were the air and the light +of the sun.' + +'You're about as fair-speakin' a man as I've met for some time,' said +Harlow, winking at the others. + +'Yes, mate,' said Philpot. 'Anyone would agree to that much! It's as +clear as mud.' + +'Now,' continued Owen, 'I am a capitalist; or, rather, I represent the +landlord and capitalist class. That is to say, all these raw materials +belong to me. It does not matter for our present argument how I +obtained possession of them, or whether I have any real right to them; +the only thing that matters now is the admitted fact that all the raw +materials which are necessary for the production of the necessaries of +life are now the property of the Landlord and Capitalist class. I am +that class: all these raw materials belong to me.' + +'Good enough!' agreed Philpot. + +'Now you three represent the Working class: you have nothing--and for +my part, although I have all these raw materials, they are of no use to +me--what I need is--the things that can be made out of these raw +materials by Work: but as I am too lazy to work myself, I have invented +the Money Trick to make you work FOR me. But first I must explain that +I possess something else beside the raw materials. These three knives +represent--all the machinery of production; the factories, tools, +railways, and so forth, without which the necessaries of life cannot be +produced in abundance. And these three coins'--taking three +halfpennies from his pocket--'represent my Money Capital.' + +'But before we go any further,' said Owen, interrupting himself, 'it is +most important that you remember that I am not supposed to be merely +"a" capitalist. I represent the whole Capitalist Class. You are not +supposed to be just three workers--you represent the whole Working +Class.' + +'All right, all right,' said Crass, impatiently, 'we all understand +that. Git on with it.' + +Owen proceeded to cut up one of the slices of bread into a number of +little square blocks. + +'These represent the things which are produced by labour, aided by +machinery, from the raw materials. We will suppose that three of these +blocks represent--a week's work. We will suppose that a week's work is +worth--one pound: and we will suppose that each of these ha'pennies is +a sovereign. We'd be able to do the trick better if we had real +sovereigns, but I forgot to bring any with me.' + +'I'd lend you some,' said Philpot, regretfully, 'but I left me purse on +our grand pianner.' + +As by a strange coincidence nobody happened to have any gold with them, +it was decided to make shift with the halfpence. + +'Now this is the way the trick works--' + +'Before you goes on with it,' interrupted Philpot, apprehensively, +'don't you think we'd better 'ave someone to keep watch at the gate in +case a Slop comes along? We don't want to get runned in, you know.' + +'I don't think there's any need for that,' replied Owen, 'there's only +one slop who'd interfere with us for playing this game, and that's +Police Constable Socialism.' + +'Never mind about Socialism,' said Crass, irritably. 'Get along with +the bloody trick.' + +Owen now addressed himself to the working classes as represented by +Philpot, Harlow and Easton. + +'You say that you are all in need of employment, and as I am the +kind-hearted capitalist class I am going to invest all my money in +various industries, so as to give you Plenty of Work. I shall pay each +of you one pound per week, and a week's work is--you must each produce +three of these square blocks. For doing this work you will each +receive your wages; the money will be your own, to do as you like with, +and the things you produce will of course be mine, to do as I like +with. You will each take one of these machines and as soon as you have +done a week's work, you shall have your money.' + +The Working Classes accordingly set to work, and the Capitalist class +sat down and watched them. As soon as they had finished, they passed +the nine little blocks to Owen, who placed them on a piece of paper by +his side and paid the workers their wages. + +'These blocks represent the necessaries of life. You can't live +without some of these things, but as they belong to me, you will have +to buy them from me: my price for these blocks is--one pound each.' + +As the working classes were in need of the necessaries of life and as +they could not eat, drink or wear the useless money, they were +compelled to agree to the kind Capitalist's terms. They each bought +back and at once consumed one-third of the produce of their labour. The +capitalist class also devoured two of the square blocks, and so the net +result of the week's work was that the kind capitalist had consumed two +pounds worth of the things produced by the labour of the others, and +reckoning the squares at their market value of one pound each, he had +more than doubled his capital, for he still possessed the three pounds +in money and in addition four pounds worth of goods. As for the +working classes, Philpot, Harlow and Easton, having each consumed the +pound's worth of necessaries they had bought with their wages, they +were again in precisely the same condition as when they started +work--they had nothing. + +This process was repeated several times: for each week's work the +producers were paid their wages. They kept on working and spending all +their earnings. The kind-hearted capitalist consumed twice as much as +any one of them and his pile of wealth continually increased. In a +little while--reckoning the little squares at their market value of one +pound each--he was worth about one hundred pounds, and the working +classes were still in the same condition as when they began, and were +still tearing into their work as if their lives depended upon it. + +After a while the rest of the crowd began to laugh, and their merriment +increased when the kind-hearted capitalist, just after having sold a +pound's worth of necessaries to each of his workers, suddenly took +their tools--the Machinery of Production--the knives away from them, +and informed them that as owing to Over Production all his store-houses +were glutted with the necessaries of life, he had decided to close down +the works. + +'Well, and wot the bloody 'ell are we to do now?' demanded Philpot. + +'That's not my business,' replied the kind-hearted capitalist. 'I've +paid you your wages, and provided you with Plenty of Work for a long +time past. I have no more work for you to do at present. Come round +again in a few months' time and I'll see what I can do for you.' + +'But what about the necessaries of life?' demanded Harlow. 'We must +have something to eat.' + +'Of course you must,' replied the capitalist, affably; 'and I shall be +very pleased to sell you some.' + +'But we ain't got no bloody money!' + +'Well, you can't expect me to give you my goods for nothing! You +didn't work for me for nothing, you know. I paid you for your work and +you should have saved something: you should have been thrifty like me. +Look how I have got on by being thrifty!' + +The unemployed looked blankly at each other, but the rest of the crowd +only laughed; and then the three unemployed began to abuse the +kind-hearted Capitalist, demanding that he should give them some of the +necessaries of life that he had piled up in his warehouses, or to be +allowed to work and produce some more for their own needs; and even +threatened to take some of the things by force if he did not comply +with their demands. But the kind-hearted Capitalist told them not to +be insolent, and spoke to them about honesty, and said if they were not +careful he would have their faces battered in for them by the police, +or if necessary he would call out the military and have them shot down +like dogs, the same as he had done before at Featherstone and Belfast. + +'Of course,' continued the kind-hearted capitalist, 'if it were not for +foreign competition I should be able to sell these things that you have +made, and then I should be able to give you Plenty of Work again: but +until I have sold them to somebody or other, or until I have used them +myself, you will have to remain idle.' + +'Well, this takes the bloody biskit, don't it?' said Harlow. + +'The only thing as I can see for it,' said Philpot mournfully, 'is to +'ave a unemployed procession.' + +'That's the idear,' said Harlow, and the three began to march about the +room in Indian file, singing: + + 'We've got no work to do-oo-oo' + We've got no work to do-oo-oo! + Just because we've been workin' a dam sight too hard, + Now we've got no work to do.' + +As they marched round, the crowd jeered at them and made offensive +remarks. Crass said that anyone could see that they were a lot of +lazy, drunken loafers who had never done a fair day's work in their +lives and never intended to. + +'We shan't never get nothing like this, you know,' said Philpot. 'Let's +try the religious dodge.' + +'All right,' agreed Harlow. 'What shall we give 'em?' + +'I know!' cried Philpot after a moment's deliberation. '"Let my lower +lights be burning." That always makes 'em part up.' + +The three unemployed accordingly resumed their march round the room, +singing mournfully and imitating the usual whine of street-singers: + + 'Trim your fee-bil lamp me brither-in, + Some poor sail-er tempest torst, + Strugglin' 'ard to save the 'arb-er, + Hin the dark-niss may be lorst, + So let try lower lights be burning, + Send 'er gleam acrost the wave, + Some poor shipwrecked, struggling seaman, + You may rescue, you may save.' + +'Kind frens,' said Philpot, removing his cap and addressing the crowd, +'we're hall honest British workin' men, but we've been hout of work for +the last twenty years on account of foreign competition and +over-production. We don't come hout 'ere because we're too lazy to +work; it's because we can't get a job. If it wasn't for foreign +competition, the kind'earted Hinglish capitalists would be able to sell +their goods and give us Plenty of Work, and if they could, I assure you +that we should hall be perfectly willing and contented to go on workin' +our bloody guts out for the benefit of our masters for the rest of our +lives. We're quite willin' to work: that's hall we arst for--Plenty of +Work--but as we can't get it we're forced to come out 'ere and arst you +to spare a few coppers towards a crust of bread and a night's lodgin'.' + +As Philpot held out his cap for subscriptions, some of them attempted +to expectorate into it, but the more charitable put in pieces of cinder +or dirt from the floor, and the kind-hearted capitalist was so affected +by the sight of their misery that he gave them one of the sovereigns he +had in us pocket: but as this was of no use to them they immediately +returned it to him in exchange for one of the small squares of the +necessaries of life, which they divided and greedily devoured. And +when they had finished eating they gathered round the philanthropist +and sang, 'For he's a jolly good fellow,' and afterwards Harlow +suggested that they should ask him if he would allow them to elect him +to Parliament. + + + +Chapter 22 + +The Phrenologist + + +The following morning--Saturday--the men went about their work in +gloomy silence; there were but few attempts at conversation and no +jests or singing. The tenor of the impending slaughter pervaded the +house. Even those who were confident of being spared and kept on till +the job was finished shared the general depression, not only out of +sympathy for the doomed, but because they knew that a similar fate +awaited themselves a little later on. + +They all waited anxiously for Nimrod to come, but hour after hour +dragged slowly by and he did not arrive. At half past eleven some of +those who had made up their minds that they were to be 'stood still' +began to hope that the slaughter was to be deferred for a few days: +after all, there was plenty of work still to be done: even if all hands +were kept on, the job could scarcely be finished in another week. +Anyhow, it would not be very long now before they would know one way or +the other. If he did not come before twelve, it was all right: all the +hands were paid by the hour and were therefore entitled to an hour's +notice. + +Easton and Harlow were working together on the staircase, finishing the +doors and other woodwork with white enamel. The men had not been +allowed to spend the time necessary to prepare this work in a proper +manner, it had not been rubbed down smooth or properly filled up, and +it had not had a sufficient number of coats of paint to make it solid +white. Now that the glossy enamel was put on, the work looked rather +rough and shady. + +'It ain't 'arf all right, ain't it?' remarked Harlow, sarcastically, +indicating the door he had just finished. + +Easton laughed: 'I can't understand how people pass such work,' he said. + +'Old Sweater did make some remark about it the other day,' replied +Harlow, 'and I heard Misery tell 'im it was impossible to make a +perfect job of such old doors.' + +'I believe that man's the biggest liar Gord ever made,' said Easton, an +opinion in which Harlow entirely concurred. + +'I wonder what the time is?' said the latter after a pause. + +'I don't know exactly,' replied Easton, 'but it can't be far off +twelve.' + +''E don't seem to be comin', does 'e?' Harlow continued. + +'No: and I shouldn't be surprised if 'e didn't turn up at all, now. +P'raps 'e don't mean to stop nobody today after all.' + +They spoke in hushed tones and glanced cautiously about them fearful of +being heard or observed. + +'This is a bloody life, ain't it?' Harlow said, bitterly. 'Workin' our +guts out like a lot of slaves for the benefit of other people, and then +as soon as they've done with you, you're chucked aside like a dirty +rag.' + +'Yes: and I begin to think that a great deal of what Owen says is true. +But for my part I can't see 'ow it's ever goin' to be altered, can you?' + +Blowed if I know, mate. But whether it can be altered or not, there's +one thing very certain; it won't be done in our time.' + +Neither of them seemed to think that if the 'alteration' they spoke of +were to be accomplished at all they themselves would have to help to +bring it about. + +'I wonder what they're doin' about the venetian blinds?' said Easton. +'Is there anyone doin' em yet?' + +'I don't know; ain't 'eard nothing about 'em since the boy took 'em to +the shop.' + +There was quite a mystery about these blinds. About a month ago they +were taken to the paint-shop down at the yard to be repainted and +re-harnessed, and since then nothing had been heard of them by the men +working at the 'Cave'. + +'P'hap's a couple of us will be sent there to do 'em next week,' +remarked Harlow. + +'P'hap's so. Most likely they'll 'ave to be done in a bloody 'urry at +the last minute.' + +Presently Harlow--who was very anxious to know what time it was--went +downstairs to ask Slyme. It was twenty minutes to twelve. + +From the window of the room where Slyme was papering, one could see +into the front garden. Harlow paused a moment to watch Bundy and the +labourers, who were still working in the trenches at the drains, and as +he looked out he saw Hunter approaching the house. Harlow drew back +hastily and returned to his work, and as he went he passed the word to +the other men, warning them of the approach of Misery. + +Hunter entered in his usual manner and, after crawling quietly about +the house for about ten minutes, he went into the drawing room. + +'I see you're putting the finishing touches on at last,' he said. + +'Yes,' replied Owen. 'I've only got this bit of outlining to do now.' + +'Ah, well, it looks very nice, of course,' said Misery in a voice of +mourning, 'but we've lost money over it. It's taken you a week longer +to do than we allowed for; you said three weeks and it's taken you a +month; and we only allowed for fifteen books of gold, but you've been +and used twenty-three.' + +'You can hardly blame me for that, you know,' answered Owen. 'I could +have got it done in the three weeks, but Mr Rushton told me not to +hurry for the sake of a day or two, because he wanted a good job. He +said he would rather lose a little over it than spoil it; and as for +the extra gold, that was also his order.' + +'Well, I suppose it can't be helped,' whined Misery. 'Anyhow, I'm very +glad it's done, because this kind of work don't pay. We'll 'ave you +back on the brush on Monday morning; we want to get outside done next +week if it keeps fine.' + +The 'brush' alluded to by Nimrod was the large 'pound' brush used in +ordinary painting. + +Misery now began wandering about the house, in and out of the rooms, +sometimes standing for several minutes silently watching the hands as +they worked. As he watched them the men became nervous and awkward, +each one dreading that he might be one of those who were to be paid off +at one o'clock. + +At about five minutes to twelve Hunter went down to the paint-shop--the +scullery--where Crass was mixing some colour, and getting ready some +'empties' to be taken to the yard. + +'I suppose the b--r's gone to ask Crass which of us is the least use,' +whispered Harlow to Easton. + +'I wouldn't be surprised if it was you and me, for two,' replied the +latter in the same tone. 'You can't trust Crass you know, for all 'e +seems so friendly to our faces. You never know what 'e ses behind our +backs.' + +'You may be sure it won't be Sawkins or any of the other light-weights, +because Nimrod won't want to pay us sixpence ha'penny for painting +guttering and rainpipes when THEY can do it near enough for fourpence +ha'penny and fivepence. They won't be able to do the sashes, though, +will they?' + +'I don't know so much about that,' replied Easton. 'Anything seems to +be good enough for Hunter.' + +'Look out! Ere 'e comes!' said Harlow, and they both relapsed into +silence and busied themselves with their work. Misery stood watching +them for some time without speaking, and then went out of the house. +They crept cautiously to the window of a room that overlooked the +garden and, peeping furtively out, they saw him standing on the brink +of one of the trenches, moodily watching Bundy and his mates as they +toiled at the drains. Then, to their surprise and relief, he turned +and went out of the gate! They just caught sight of one of the wheels +of his bicycle as he rode away. + +The slaughter was evidently to be put off until next week! It seemed +too good to be true. + +'P'hap's 'e's left a message for some of us with Crass?' suggested +Easton. 'I don't think it's likely, but it's just possible.' + +'Well, I'm goin' down to ask 'im,' said Harlow, desperately. 'We may +as well know the worst at once.' + +He returned in a few minutes with the information that Hunter had +decided not to stop anyone that day because he wanted to get the +outside finished during the next week, if possible. + +The hands received this intelligence with mixed feelings, because +although it left them safe for the present, it meant that nearly +everybody would certainly be stopped next Saturday, if not before; +whereas if a few had been sacked today it would have made it all the +better for the rest. Still, this aspect of the business did not +greatly interfere with the relief that they all felt at knowing that +the immediate danger was over; and the fact that it was +Saturday--pay-day--also served to revive their drooping spirits. They +all felt pretty certain that Misery would return no more that day, and +presently Harlow began to sing the old favourite. 'Work! for the night +is coming!' the refrain of which was soon taken up by nearly everyone +in the house: + + 'Work! for the night is coming, + Work in the morning hours. + Work! for the night is coming, + Work 'mid springing flowers. + + 'Work while the dew is sparkling, + Work in the noonday sun! + Work! for the night is coming + When man's work is done!' + +When this hymn was finished, someone else, imitating the whine of a +street-singer, started, 'Oh, where is my wandering boy tonight?' and +then Harlow--who by some strange chance had a penny--took it out of his +pocket and dropped it on the floor, the ringing of the coin being +greeted with shouts of 'Thank you, kind lady,' from several of the +singers. This little action of Harlow's was the means of bringing a +most extraordinary circumstance to light. Although it was Saturday +morning, several of the others had pennies or half-pence! and at the +conclusion of each verse they all followed Harlow's example and the +house resounded with the ringing of falling coins, cries of 'Thank you, +kind lady,' 'Thank you, sir,' and 'Gord bless you,' mingled with shouts +of laughter. + +'My wandering boy' was followed by a choice selection of choruses of +well-known music-hall songs, including 'Goodbye, my Bluebell', 'The +Honeysuckle and the Bee', 'I've got 'em!' and 'The Church Parade', the +whole being tastefully varied and interspersed with howls, shrieks, +curses, catcalls, and downward explosions of flatulence. + +In the midst of the uproar Crass came upstairs. + +''Ere!' he shouted. 'For Christ's sake make less row! Suppose Nimrod +was to come back!' + +'Oh, he ain't comin' any more today,' said Harlow, recklessly. + +'Besides, what if 'e does come?' cried Easton. 'Oo cares for 'im?' + +'Well, we never know; and for that matter Rushton or Sweater might come +at any minit.' + +With this, Crass went muttering back to the scullery, and the men +relapsed into their usual silence. + +At ten minutes to one they all ceased work, put away their colours and +locked up the house. There were a number of 'empties' to be taken away +and left at the yard on their way to the office; these Crass divided +amongst the others--carrying nothing himself--and then they all set out +for the office to get their money, cracking jokes as they went along. +Harlow and Easton enlivened the journey by coughing significantly +whenever they met a young woman, and audibly making some complimentary +remark about her personal appearance. If the girl smiled, each of them +eagerly claimed to have 'seen her first', but if she appeared offended +or 'stuck up', they suggested that she was cross-cut or that she had +been eating vinegar with a fork. Now and then they kissed their hands +affectionately to servant-girls whom they saw looking out of windows. +Some of these girls laughed, others looked indignant, but whichever way +they took it was equally amusing to Crass and the rest, who were like a +crowd of boys just let out of school. + +It will be remembered that there was a back door to Rushton's office; +in this door was a small sliding panel or trap-door with a little shelf +at the bottom. The men stood in the road on the pavement outside the +closed door, their money being passed out to them through the sliding +panel. As there was no shelter, when it rained they occasionally got +wet through while waiting to be paid. With some firms it is customary +to call out the names of the men and pay them in order of seniority or +ability, but there was no such system here; the man who got to the +aperture first was paid first, and so on. The result was that there +was always a sort of miniature 'Battle of Life', the men pushing and +struggling against each other as if their lives depended upon their +being paid by a certain time. + +On the ledge of the little window through which their money was passed +there was always a Hospital collection-box. Every man put either a +penny or twopence into this box. Of course, it was not compulsory to +do so, but they all did, because they felt that any man who omitted to +contribute might be 'marked'. They did not all agree with contributing +to the Hospital, for several reasons. They knew that the doctors at +the Hospital made a practice of using the free patients to make +experiments upon, and they also knew that the so-called 'free' patients +who contribute so very largely directly to the maintenance of such +institutions, get scant consideration when they apply for the 'free' +treatment, and are plainly given to understand that they are receiving +'charity'. Some of the men thought that, considering the extent to +which they contributed, they should be entitled to attention as a right. + +After receiving their wages, Crass, Easton, Bundy, Philpot, Harlow and +a few others adjourned to the Cricketers for a drink. Owen went away +alone, and Slyme also went on by himself. There was no use waiting for +Easton to come out of the public house, because there was no knowing +how long he would be; he might stay half an hour or two hours. + +On his way home, in accordance with his usual custom, Slyme called at +the Post Office to put some of his wages in the bank. Like most other +'Christians', he believed in taking thought for the morrow, what he +should eat and drink and wherewithal he was to be clothed. He thought +it wise to layup for himself as much treasure upon earth as possible. +The fact that Jesus said that His disciples were not to do these things +made no more difference to Slyme's conduct than it does to the conduct +of any other 'Christian'. They are all agreed that when Jesus said +this He meant something else: and all the other inconvenient things +that Jesus said are disposed of in the same way. For instance, these +'disciples' assure us that when Jesus said, 'Resist not evil', 'If a +man smite thee upon he right cheek turn unto him also the left', He +really meant 'Turn on to him a Maxim gun; disembowel him with a bayonet +or batter in his skull with the butt end of a rifle!' When He said, +'If one take thy coat, give him thy cloak also,' the 'Christians' say +that what He really meant was: 'If one take thy coat, give him six +months' hard labour. A few of the followers of Jesus admit that He +really did mean just what He said, but they say that the world would +never be able to go on if they followed out His teachings! That is +true. It is probably the effect that Jesus intended His teachings to +produce. It is altogether improbable that He wished the world to +continue along its present lines. But, if these pretended followers +really think--as they say that they do--that the teachings of Jesus are +ridiculous and impracticable, why continue the hypocritical farce of +calling themselves 'Christians' when they don't really believe in or +follow Him at all? + +As Jesus himself pointed out, there's no sense in calling Him 'Lord, +Lord' when they do not the things that He said. + +This banking transaction finished, Slyme resumed his homeward way, +stopping only to purchase some sweets at a confectioner's. He spent a +whole sixpence at once in this shop on a glass jar of sweets for the +baby. + +Ruth was not surprised when she saw him come in alone; it was the usual +thing since Easton had become so friendly with Crass. + +She made no reference to his absence, but Slyme noticed with secret +chagrin that she was annoyed and disappointed. She was just finishing +scrubbing the kitchen floor and little Freddie was sitting up in a +baby's high chair that had a little shelf or table fixed in front of +it. To keep him amused while she did her work, Ruth had given him a +piece of bread and raspberry jam, which the child had rubbed all over +his face and into his scalp, evidently being under the impression that +it was something for the improvement of the complexion, or a cure for +baldness. He now looked as if he had been in a fight or a railway +accident. The child hailed the arrival of Slyme with enthusiasm, being +so overcome with emotion that he began to shed tears, and was only +pacified when the man gave him the jar of sweets and took him out of +the chair. + +Slyme's presence in the house had not proved so irksome as Easton and +Ruth had dreaded it would be. Indeed, at first, he made a point of +retiring to his own room after tea every evening, until they invited +him to stay downstairs in the kitchen. Nearly every Wednesday and +Saturday he went to a meeting, or an open-air preaching, when the +weather permitted, for he was one of a little zealous band of people +connected with the Shining Light Chapel who carried on the 'open-air' +work all the year round. After a while, the Eastons not only became +reconciled to his presence in the house, but were even glad of it. Ruth +especially would often have been very lonely if he had not been there, +for it had lately become Easton's custom to spend a few evenings every +week with Crass at the Cricketers. + +When at home Slyme passed his time playing a mandolin or making +fretwork photo frames. Ruth had the baby's photograph taken a few +weeks after Slyme came, and the frame he made for it was now one of the +ornaments of the sitting-room. The instinctive, unreasoning aversion +she had at first felt for him had passed away. In a quiet, unobtrusive +manner he did her so many little services that she found it impossible +to dislike him. At first, she used to address him as 'Mr' but after a +time she fell naturally into Easton's practice of calling him by his +first name. + +As for the baby, he made no secret of his affection for the lodger, who +nursed and played with him for hours at a stretch. + +'I'll serve your dinner now, Alf,' said Ruth when she had finished +scrubbing the floor, 'but I'll wait for mine for a little while. Will +may come.' + +'I'm in no hurry,' replied Slyme. 'I'll go and have a wash; he may be +here then.' + +As he spoke, Slyme--who had been sitting by the fire nursing the +baby--who was trying to swallow the jar of sweets--put the child back +into the high chair, giving him one of the sticks of sweet out of the +jar to keep him quiet; and went upstairs to his own room. He came down +again in about a quarter of an hour, and Ruth proceeded to serve his +dinner, for Easton was still absent. + +'If I was you, I wouldn't wait for Will,' said Slyme, 'he may not come +for another hour or two. It's after two o'clock now, and I'm sure you +must be hungry.' + +'I suppose I may as well,' replied Ruth, hesitatingly. 'He'll most +likely get some bread and cheese at the "Cricketers", same as he did +last Saturday.' + +'Almost sure to,' responded Slyme. + +The baby had had his face washed while Slyme was upstairs. Directly he +saw his mother eating he threw away the sugar-stick and began to cry, +holding out his arms to her. She had to take him on her lap whilst she +ate her dinner, and feed him with pieces from her plate. + +Slyme talked all the time, principally about the child. He was very +fond of children, he said, and always got on well with them, but he had +really never known such an intelligent child--for his age--as Freddie. +His fellow-workmen would have been astonished had they been present to +hear him talking about the shape of the baby's head. They would have +been astonished at the amount of knowledge he appeared to possess of +the science of Phrenology. Ruth, at any rate, thought he was very +clever. + +After a time the child began to grow fretful and refused to eat; when +his mother gave him a fresh piece of sugar-stick out of the jar he +threw it peevishly on the floor and began to whimper, rubbing his face +against his mother's bosom and pulling at her dress with his hands. +When Slyme first came Ruth had made a practice of withdrawing from the +room if he happened to be present when she wanted to nurse the child, +but lately she had been less sensitive. She was sitting with her back +to the window and she partly covered the baby's face with a light shawl +that she wore. By the time they finished dinner the child had dozed +off to sleep. Slyme got up from his chair and stood with his back to +the fire, looking down at them; presently he spoke, referring, of +course, to the baby: + +'He's very like you, isn't he?' + +'Yes,' replied Ruth. 'Everyone says he takes after me.' + +Slyme moved a little closer, bending down to look at the slumbering +infant. + +'You know, at first I thought he was a girl,' he continued after a +pause. 'He seems almost too pretty for a boy, doesn't he?' + +Ruth smiled. 'People always take him for a girl at first,' she said. +'Yesterday I took him with me to the Monopole Stores to buy some +things, and the manager would hardly believe it wasn't a girl.' + +The man reached out his hand and stroked the baby's face. + +Although Slyme's behaviour had hitherto always been very correct, yet +there was occasionally an indefinable something in his manner when they +were alone that made Ruth feel conscious and embarrassed. Now, as she +glanced up at him and saw the expression on his face she crimsoned with +confusion and hastily lowered her eyes without replying to his last +remark. He did not speak again either, and they remained for several +minutes in silence, as if spellbound, Ruth oppressed with instinctive +dread, and Slyme scarcely less agitated, his face flushed and his heart +beating wildly. He trembled as he stood over her, hesitating and afraid. + +And then the silence was suddenly broken by the creaking and clanging +of the front gate, heralding the tardy coming of Easton. Slyme went +out into the scullery and, taking down the blacking brushes from the +shelf, began cleaning his boots. + +It was plain from Easton's appearance and manner that he had been +drinking, but Ruth did not reproach him in any way; on the contrary, +she seemed almost feverishly anxious to attend to his comfort. + +When Slyme finished cleaning his boots he went upstairs to his room, +receiving a careless greeting from Easton as he passed through the +kitchen. He felt nervous and apprehensive that Ruth might say +something to Easton, and was not quite able to reassure himself with +the reflection that, after all, there was nothing to tell. As for +Ruth, she had to postpone the execution of her hastily formed +resolution to tell her husband of Slyme's strange behaviour, for Easton +fell asleep in his chair before he had finished his dinner, and she had +some difficulty in waking him sufficiently to persuade him to go +upstairs to bed, where he remained until tea-time. Probably he would +not have come down even then if it had not been for the fact that he +had made an appointment to meet Crass at the Cricketers. + +Whilst Easton was asleep, Slyme had been downstairs in the kitchen, +making a fretwork frame. He played with Freddie while Ruth prepared +the tea, and he appeared to her to be so unconscious of having done +anything unusual that she began to think that she must have been +mistaken in imagining that he had intended anything wrong. + +After tea, Slyme put on his best clothes to go to his usual 'open-air' +meeting. As a rule Easton and Ruth went out marketing together every +Saturday night, but this evening he could not wait for her because he +had promised to meet Crass at seven o'clock; so he arranged to see her +down town at eight. + + + +Chapter 23 + +The 'Open-air' + + +During the last few weeks ever since he had been engaged on the +decoration of the drawing-room, Owen had been so absorbed in his work +that he had no time for other things. Of course, all he was paid for +was the time he actually worked, but really every waking moment of his +time was given to the task. Now that it was finished he felt something +like one aroused from a dream to the stern realities and terrors of +life. By the end of next week, the inside of the house and part of the +outside would be finished, and as far as he knew the firm had nothing +else to do at present. Most of the other employers in the town were in +the same plight, and it would be of no use to apply even to such of +them as had something to do, for they were not likely to take on a +fresh man while some of their regular hands were idle. + +For the last month he had forgotten that he was ill; he had forgotten +that when the work at 'The Cave' was finished he would have to stand +off with the rest of the hands. In brief, he had forgotten for the +time being that, like the majority of his fellow workmen, he was on the +brink of destitution, and that a few weeks of unemployment or idleness +meant starvation. As far as illness was concerned, he was even worse +off than most others, for the greater number of them were members of +some sick benefit club, but Owen's ill-health rendered him ineligible +for membership of such societies. + +As he walked homewards after being paid, feeling unutterably depressed +and weary, he began once more to think of the future; and the more he +thought of it the more dreadful it appeared. Even looking at it in the +best possible light--supposing he did not fall too ill to work, or lose +his employment from some other cause--what was there to live for? He +had been working all this week. These few coins that he held in his +hand were the result, and he laughed bitterly as he thought of all they +had to try to do with this money, and of all that would have to be left +undone. + +As he turned the corner of Kerk Street he saw Frankie coming to meet +him, and the boy catching sight of him at the same moment began running +and leapt into his arms with a joyous whoop. + +'Mother told me to tell you to buy something for dinner before you come +home, because there's nothing in the house.' + +'Did she tell you what I was to get?' + +She did tell me something, but I forget what it was. But I know she +said to get anything you like if you couldn't get what she told me to +tell you.' + +'Well, we'll go and see what we can find,' said Owen. + +'If I were you, I'd get a tin of salmon or some eggs and bacon,' +suggested Frankie as he skipped along holding his father's hand. 'We +don't want anything that's a lot of trouble to cook, you know, because +Mum's not very well today.' + +'Is she up?' + +She's been up all the morning, but she's lying down now. We've done +all the work, though. While she was making the beds I started washing +up the cups and saucers without telling her, but when she came in and +saw what a mess I'd made on the floor, she had to stop me doing it, and +she had to change nearly all my clothes as well, because I was almost +wet through; but I managed the wiping up all right when she did the +washing, and I swept the passage and put all my things tidy and made +the cat's bed. And that just reminds me: will you please give me my +penny now? I promised the cat that I'd bring him back some meat.' + +Owen complied with the boy's request, and while the latter went to the +butcher's for the meat, Owen went into the grocer's to get something +for dinner, it being arranged that they were to meet again at the +corner of the street. Owen was at the appointed place first and after +waiting some time and seeing no sign of the boy he decided to go +towards the butcher's to meet him. When he came in sight of the shop +he saw the boy standing outside in earnest conversation with the +butcher, a jolly-looking stoutly built man, with a very red face. Owen +perceived at once that the child was trying to explain something, +because Frankie had a habit of holding his head sideways and +supplementing his speech by spreading out his fingers and making quaint +gestures with his hands whenever he found it difficult to make himself +understood. The boy was doing this now, waving one hand about with the +fingers and thumb extended wide, and with the other flourishing a paper +parcel which evidently contained the pieces of meat. Presently the man +laughed heartily and after shaking hands with Frankie went into the +shop to attend to a customer, and Frankie rejoined his father. + +'That butcher's a very decent sort of chap, you know, Dad,' he said. +'He wouldn't take a penny for the meat.' + +'Is that what you were talking to him about?' + +No; we were talking about Socialism. You see, this is the second time +he wouldn't take the money, and the first time he did it I thought he +must be a Socialist, but I didn't ask him then. But when he did it +again this time I asked him if he was. So he said, No. He said he +wasn't quite mad yet. So I said, "If you think that Socialists are all +mad, you're very much mistaken, because I'm a Socialist myself, and I'm +quite sure I'M not mad." So he said he knew I was all right, but he +didn't understand anything about Socialism himself--only that it meant +sharing out all the money so that everyone could have the same. So +then I told him that's not Socialism at all! And when I explained it +to him properly and advised him to be one, he said he'd think about it. +So I said if he'd only do that he'd be sure to change over to our side; +and then he laughed and promised to let me know next time he sees me, +and I promised to lend him some literature. You won't mind, will you, +Dad?' + +'Of course not; when we get home we'll have a look through what we've +got and you can take him some of them.' + +'I know!' cried Frankie eagerly. 'The two very best of all. Happy +Britain and England for the English.' + +He knew that these were 'two of the best' because he had often heard +his father and mother say so, and he had noticed that whenever a +Socialist friend came to visit them, he was also of the same opinion. + + + +As a rule on Saturday evenings they all three went out together to do +the marketing, but on this occasion, in consequence of Nora being +unwell, Owen and Frankie went by themselves. The frequent recurrence +of his wife's illness served to increase Owen's pessimism with regard +to the future, and the fact that he was unable to procure for her the +comforts she needed was not calculated to dispel the depression that +filled his mind as he reflected that there was no hope of better times. + +In the majority of cases, for a workman there is no hope of +advancement. After he has learnt his trade and become a 'journeyman' +all progress ceases. He is at the goal. After he has been working ten +or twenty years he commands no more than he did at first--a bare living +wage--sufficient money to purchase fuel to keep the human machine +working. As he grows older he will have to be content with even less; +and all the time he holds his employment at the caprice and by the +favour of his masters, who regard him merely as a piece of mechanism +that enables them to accumulate money--a thing which they are justified +in casting aside as soon as it becomes unprofitable. And the workman +must not only be an efficient money-producing machine, but he must also +be the servile subject of his masters. If he is not abjectly civil and +humble, if he will not submit tamely to insult, indignity, and every +form of contemptuous treatment that occasion makes possible, he can be +dismissed, and replaced in a moment by one of the crowd of unemployed +who are always waiting for his job. This is the status of the majority +of the 'Heirs of all the ages' under the present system. + +As he walked through the crowded streets holding Frankie by the hand, +Owen thought that to voluntarily continue to live such a life as this +betokened a degraded mind. To allow one's child to grow up to suffer +it in turn was an act of callous, criminal cruelty. + +In this matter he held different opinions from most of his fellow +workmen. The greater number of them were quite willing and content +that their children should be made into beasts of burden for the +benefit of other people. As he looked down upon the little, frail +figure trotting along by his side, Owen thought for the thousandth time +that it would be far better for the child to die now: he would never be +fit to be a soldier in the ferocious Christian Battle of Life. + +Then he remembered Nora. Although she was always brave, and never +complained, he knew that her life was one of almost incessant physical +suffering; and as for himself he was tired and sick of it all. He had +been working like a slave all his life and there was nothing to show +for it--there never would be anything to show for it. He thought of +the man who had killed his wife and children. The jury had returned +the usual verdict, 'Temporary Insanity'. It never seemed to occur to +these people that the truth was that to continue to suffer hopelessly +like this was evidence of permanent insanity. + +But supposing that bodily death was not the end. Suppose there was +some kind of a God? If there were, it wasn't unreasonable to think +that the Being who was capable of creating such a world as this and who +seemed so callously indifferent to the unhappiness of His creatures, +would also be capable of devising and creating the other Hell that most +people believed in. + +Although it was December the evening was mild and clear. The full moon +deluged the town with silvery light, and the cloudless sky was jewelled +with myriads of glittering stars. + +Looking out into the unfathomable infinity of space, Owen wondered what +manner of Being or Power it was that had originated and sustained all +this? Considered as an explanation of the existence of the universe, +the orthodox Christian religion was too absurd to merit a second +thought. But then, every other conceivable hypothesis was +also--ultimately--unsatisfactory and even ridiculous. To believe that +the universe as it is now has existed from all eternity without any +Cause is surely ridiculous. But to say that it was created by a Being +who existed without a Cause from all eternity is equally ridiculous. +In fact, it was only postponing the difficulty one stage. Evolution +was not more satisfactory, because although it was undoubtedly true as +far as it went, it only went part of the way, leaving the great +question still unanswered by assuming the existence--in the +beginning--of the elements of matter, without a cause! The question +remained unanswered because it was unanswerable. Regarding this +problem man was but-- + + 'An infant crying in the night, + An infant crying for the light + And with no language but a cry.' + +All the same, it did not follow, because one could not explain the +mystery oneself, that it was right to try to believe an unreasonable +explanation offered by someone else. + +But although he reasoned like this, Owen could not help longing for +something to believe, for some hope for the future; something to +compensate for the unhappiness of the present. In one sense, he +thought, how good it would be if Christianity were true, and after all +the sorrow there was to be an eternity of happiness such as it had +never entered into the heart of man to conceive? If only that were +true, nothing else would matter. How contemptible and insignificant the +very worst that could happen here would be if one knew that this life +was only a short journey that was to terminate at the beginning of an +eternity of joy? But no one really believed this; and as for those who +pretended to do so--their lives showed that they did not believe it at +all. Their greed and inhumanity--their ferocious determination to +secure for themselves the good things of THIS world--were conclusive +proofs of their hypocrisy and infidelity. + +'Dad,' said Frankie, suddenly, 'let's go over and hear what that man's +saying.' He pointed across the way to where--a little distance back +from the main road, just round the corner of a side street--a group of +people were standing encircling a large lantern fixed on the top of a +pole about seven feet high, which was being held by one of the men. A +bright light was burning inside this lantern and on the pane of white, +obscured glass which formed the sides, visible from where Owen and +Frankie were standing, was written in bold plain letters that were +readable even at that distance, the text: + + 'Be not deceived: God is not mocked!' + +The man whose voice had attracted Frankie's attention was reading out a +verse of a hymn: + + 'I heard the voice of Jesus say, + Behold, I freely give, + The living water, thirsty one, + Stoop down and drink, and live. + I came to Jesus and I drank + Of that life giving stream, + My thirst was quenched, + My soul revived, + And now I live in Him.' + +The individual who gave out this hymn was a tall, thin man whose +clothes hung loosely on the angles of his round-shouldered, bony form. +His long, thin legs--about which the baggy trousers hung in ungraceful +folds--were slightly knock-kneed, and terminated in large, flat feet. +His arms were very long even for such a tall man, and the huge, bony +hands were gnarled and knotted. Regardless of the season, he had +removed his bowler hat, revealing his forehead, which was high, flat +and narrow. His nose was a large, fleshy, hawklike beak, and from the +side of each nostril a deep indentation extended downwards until it +disappeared in the drooping moustache that concealed his mouth when he +was not speaking, but the vast extent of which was perceptible now as +he opened it to call out the words of the hymn. His chin was large and +extraordinarily long: the eyes were pale blue, very small and close +together, surmounted by spare, light-, almost invisible +eyebrows with a deep vertical cleft between them over the nose. His +head--covered with thick, coarse brown hair--was very large, especially +at the back; the ears were small and laid close to the head. If one +were to make a full-face drawing of his cadaverous visage, it would be +found that the outline resembled that of the lid of a coffin. + +As Owen and Frankie drew near, the boy tugged at his father's hand and +whispered: 'Dad! that's the teacher at the Sunday School where I went +that day with Charley and Elsie.' + +Owen looked quickly and saw that it was Hunter. + +As Hunter ceased reading out the words of the hymn, the little company +of evangelists began to sing, accompanied by the strains of a small but +peculiarly sweet-toned organ. A few persons in the crowd joined in, +the words being familiar to them. During the singing their faces were +a study, they all looked so profoundly solemn and miserable, as if they +were a gang of condemned criminals waiting to be led forth to +execution. The great number of the people standing around appeared to +be listening more out of idle curiosity than anything else, and two +well-dressed young men--evidently strangers and visitors to the +town--amused themselves by making audible remarks about the texts on +the lantern. There was also a shabbily dressed, semi-drunken man in a +battered bowler hat who stood on the inner edge of the crowd, almost in +the ring itself, with folded arms and an expression of scorn. He had a +very thin, pale face with a large, high-bridged nose, and bore a +striking resemblance to the First Duke of Wellington. + +As the singing proceeded, the scornful expression faded from the visage +of the Semi-drunk, and he not only joined in, but unfolded his arms and +began waving them about as if he were conducting the music. + +By the time the singing was over a considerable crowd had gathered, and +then one of the evangelists, the same man who had given out the hymn, +stepped into the middle of the ring. He had evidently been offended by +the unseemly conduct of the two well-dressed young men, for after a +preliminary glance round upon the crowd, he fixed his gaze upon the +pair, and immediately launched out upon a long tirade against what he +called 'Infidelity'. Then, having heartily denounced all those who--as +he put it--'refused' to believe, he proceeded to ridicule those +half-and-half believers, who, while professing to believe the Bible, +rejected the doctrine of Hell. That the existence of a place of +eternal torture is taught in the Bible, he tried to prove by a long +succession of texts. As he proceeded he became very excited, and the +contemptuous laughter of the two unbelievers seemed to make him worse. +He shouted and raved, literally foaming at the mouth and glaring in a +frenzied manner around upon the faces of the crowd. + +'There is a Hell!' he shouted. 'And understand this clearly--"The +wicked shall be turned into hell"--"He that believeth not shall be +damned."' + +'Well, then, you'll stand a very good chance of being damned also,' +exclaimed one of the two young men. + +''Ow do you make it out?' demanded the preacher, wiping the froth from +his lips and the perspiration from his forehead with his handkerchief. + +'Why, because you don't believe the Bible yourselves.' + +Nimrod and the other evangelists laughed, and looked pityingly at the +young man. + +'Ah, my dear brother,' said Misery. 'That's your delusion. I thank +God I do believe it, every word!' + +'Amen,' fervently ejaculated Slyme and several of the other disciples. + +'Oh no, you don't,' replied the other. 'And I can prove you don't.' + +'Prove it, then,' said Nimrod. + +'Read out the 17th and 18th verses of the XVIth chapter of Mark,' said +the disturber of the meeting. The crowd began to close in on the +centre, the better to hear the dispute. Misery, standing close to the +lantern, found the verse mentioned and read aloud as follows: + +'And these signs shall follow them that believe. In my name shall they +cast out devils: they shall speak with new tongues. They shall take up +serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing it shall not hurt them: +they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.' + +'Well, you can't heal the sick, neither can you speak new languages or +cast out devils: but perhaps you can drink deadly things without +suffering harm.' The speaker here suddenly drew from his waistcoat +pocket a small glass bottle and held it out towards Misery, who shrank +from it with horror as he continued: 'I have here a most deadly poison. +There is in this bottle sufficient strychnine to kill a dozen +unbelievers. Drink it! And if it doesn't harm you, we'll know that +you really are a believer and that what you believe is the truth!' + +''Ear, 'ear!' said the Semi-drunk, who had listened to the progress of +the argument with great interest. ''Ear, 'ear! That's fair enough. +Git it acrost yer chest.' + +Some of the people in the crowd began to laugh, and voices were heard +from several quarters calling upon Misery to drink the strychnine. + +'Now, if you'll allow me, I'll explain to you what that there verse +means,' said Hunter. 'If you read it carefully--WITH the context--' + +'I don't want you to tell me what it means,' interrupted the other. 'I +am able to read for myself. Whatever you may say, or pretend to think +it means, I know what it says.' + +'Hear, Hear,' shouted several voices, and angry cries of 'Why don't you +drink the poison?' began to be heard from the outskirts of the crowd. + +'Are you going to drink it or not?' demanded the man with the bottle. + +'No! I'm not such a fool!' retorted Misery, fiercely, and a loud shout +of laughter broke from the crowd.' + +'P'haps some of the other "believers" would like to,' said the young +man sneeringly, looking round upon the disciples. As no one seemed +desirous of availing himself of this offer, the man returned the bottle +regretfully to his pocket. + +'I suppose,' said Misery, regarding the owner of the strychnine with a +sneer, 'I suppose you're one of them there hired critics wot's goin' +about the country doin' the Devil's work?' + +'Wot I wants to know is this 'ere,' said the Semi-drunk, suddenly +advancing into the middle of the ring and speaking in a loud voice. +'Where did Cain get 'is wife from?' + +'Don't answer 'im, Brother 'Unter,' said Mr Didlum, one of the +disciples. This was rather an unnecessary piece of advice, because +Misery did not know the answer. + +An individual in a long black garment--the 'minister'--now whispered +something to Miss Didlum, who was seated at the organ, whereupon she +began to play, and the 'believers' began to sing, as loud as they could +so as to drown the voices of the disturbers of the meeting, a song +called 'Oh, that will be Glory for me!' + +After this hymn the 'minister' invited a shabbily dressed 'brother'--a +working-man member of the PSA, to say a 'few words', and the latter +accordingly stepped into the centre of the ring and held forth as +follows: + +'My dear frens, I thank Gord tonight that I can stand 'ere tonight, +hout in the hopen hair and tell hall you dear people tonight of hall +wot's been done for ME. Ho my dear frens hi ham so glad tonight as I +can stand 'ere tonight and say as hall my sins is hunder the blood +tonight and wot 'E's done for me 'E can do for you tonight. If you'll +honly do as I done and just acknowledge yourself a lost sinner--' + +'Yes! that's the honly way!' shouted Nimrod. + +'Amen,' cried all the other believers. + +'--If you'll honly come to 'im tonight in the same way as I done you'll +see wot 'E's done for me 'E can do for you. Ho my dear frens, don't go +puttin' it orf from day to day like a door turnin' on its 'inges, don't +put orf to some more convenient time because you may never 'ave another +chance. 'Im that bein' orfen reproved 'ardeneth 'is neck shall be +suddenly cut orf and that without remedy. Ho come to 'im tonight, for +'Is name's sake and to 'Im we'll give hall the glory. Amen.' + +'Amen,' said the believers, fervently, and then the man who was dressed +in the long garment entreated all those who were not yet true +believers--and doers--of the word to join earnestly and MEANINGLY in +the singing of the closing hymn, which he was about to read out to them. + +The Semi-drunk obligingly conducted as before, and the crowd faded away +with the last notes of the music. + + + +Chapter 24 + +Ruth + + +As has already been stated, hitherto Slyme had passed the greater +number of his evenings at home, but during the following three weeks a +change took place in his habits in this respect. He now went out +nearly every night and did not return until after ten o'clock. On +meeting nights he always changed his attire, dressing himself as on +Sundays, but on the other occasions he went out in his week-day +clothes. Ruth often wondered where he went on those nights, but he +never volunteered the information and she never asked him. + +Easton had chummed up with a lot of the regular customers at the +'Cricketers', where he now spent most of his spare time, drinking beer, +telling yarns or playing shove-ha'penny or hooks and rings. When he had +no cash the Old Dear gave him credit until Saturday. At first, the +place had not had much attraction for him, and he really went there +only for the purpose of 'keeping in' with Crass: but after a time he +found it a very congenial way of passing his evenings... + +One evening, Ruth saw Slyme meet Crass as if by appointment and as the +two men went away together she returned to her housework wondering what +it meant. + +Meantime, Crass and Slyme proceeded on their way down town. It was +about half past six o'clock: the shops and streets were brilliantly +lighted, and as they went along they saw numerous groups of men talking +together in a listless way. Most of them were artisans and labourers +out of employment and evidently in no great hurry to go home. Some of +them had neither tea nor fire to go to, and stayed away from home as +long as possible so as not to be compelled to look upon the misery of +those who were waiting for them there. Others hung about hoping +against all probability that they might even yet--although it was so +late--hear of some job to be started somewhere or other. + +As they passed one of these groups they recognized and nodded to Newman +and old Jack Linden, and the former left the others and came up to +Crass and Slyme, who did not pause, so Newman walked along with them. + +'Anything fresh in, Bob?' he asked. + +'No; we ain't got 'ardly anything,' replied Crass. 'I reckon we shall +finish up at "The Cave" next week, and then I suppose we shall all be +stood orf. We've got several plumbers on, and I believe there's a +little gas-fitting work in, but next to nothing in our line.' + +'I suppose you don't know of any other firm what's got anything?' + +'No, I don't, mate. Between you and me, I don't think any of 'em has; +they're all in about the same fix.' + +'I've not done anything since I left, you know,' said Newman, 'and +we've just about got as far as we can get, at home.' + +Slyme and Crass said nothing in reply to this. They wished that Newman +would take himself off, because they did not want him to know where +they were going. + +However, Newman continued to accompany them and an awkward silence +succeeded. He seemed to wish to say something more, and they both +guessed what it was. So they walked along as rapidly as possible in +order not to give him any encouragement. At last Newman blurted out: + +'I suppose--you don't happen--either of you--to have a tanner you could +lend me? I'll let you have it back--when I get a job.' + +'I ain't mate,' replied Crass. 'I'm sorry; if I 'ad one on me, you +should 'ave it, with pleasure.' + +Slyme also expressed his regret that he had no money with him, and at +the corner of the next street Newman--ashamed of having asked--wished +them 'good night' and went away. + +Slyme and Crass hurried along and presently arrived at Rushton & Co.'s +shop. The windows were lit up with electric light, displaying an +assortment of wallpapers, gas and electric light fittings, glass +shades, globes, tins of enamel, paint and varnish. Several framed +show-cards--'Estimates Free', 'First class work only, at moderate +charges', 'Only First Class Workmen Employed' and several others of the +same type. On one side wall of the window was a large shield-shaped +board covered with black velvet on which a number of brass fittings for +coffins were arranged. The shield was on an oak mount with the +inscription: 'Funerals conducted on modern principles'. + +Slyme waited outside while Crass went in. Mr Budd, the shopman, was +down at the far end near the glazed partition which separated Mr +Rushton's office from the front shop. As Crass entered, Budd--who was +a pale-faced, unhealthy-looking, undersized youth about twenty years of +age--looked round and, with a grimace, motioned him to walk softly. +Crass paused, wondering what the other meant; but the shopman beckoned +him to advance, grinning and winking and jerking his thumb over his +shoulder in the direction of the office. Crass hesitated, fearing that +possibly the miserable Budd had gone--or been driven--out of his mind; +but as the latter continued to beckon and grin and point towards the +office Crass screwed up his courage and followed him behind one of the +showcases, and applying his eye to a crack in the woodwork of the +partition indicated by Budd, he could see Mr Rushton in the act of +kissing and embracing Miss Wade, the young lady clerk. Crass watched +them for some time and then whispered to Budd to call Slyme, and when +the latter came they all three took turns at peeping through the crack +in the partition. + +When they had looked their fill they came out from behind the showcase, +almost bursting with suppressed merriment. Budd reached down a key +from where it was hanging on a hook on the wall and gave it to Crass +and the two resumed their interrupted journey. But before they had +proceeded a dozen yards from the shop, they were accosted by a short, +elderly man with grey hair and a beard. This man looked about +sixty-five years of age, and was very shabbily dressed. The ends of +the sleeves of his coat were frayed and ragged, and the elbows were +worn threadbare. His boots were patched, broken, and down at heel, and +the knees and bottoms of the legs of his trousers were in the same +condition as the sleeves of his coat. This man's name was Latham; he +was a venetian blind maker and repairer. With his son, he was supposed +to be 'in business' on his own account, but as most of their work was +done for 'the trade', that is, for such firms as Rushton & Co., they +would be more correctly described as men who did piecework at home. + +He had been 'in business'--as he called it--for about forty years +working, working, always working; and ever since his son became old +enough to labour he had helped his father in the philanthropic task of +manufacturing profits for the sweaters who employed them. They had +been so busy running after work, and working for the benefit of others, +that they had overlooked the fact that they were only earning a bare +living for themselves and now, after forty years' hard labour, the old +man was clothed in rags and on the verge of destitution. + +'Is Rushton there?' he asked. + +'Yes, I think so,' replied Crass, attempting to pass on; but the old +man detained him. + +'He promised to let us know about them blinds for "The Cave". We gave +'im a price for 'em about a month ago. In fact, we gave 'im two +prices, because he said the first was too high. Five and six a set I +asked 'im! take 'em right through the 'ole 'ouse! one with +another--big and little. Two coats of paint, and new tapes and cords. +That wasn't too much, was it?' + +'No,' said Crass, walking on; 'that was cheap enough!' + +HE said it was too much,' continued Latham. 'Said as 'e could get 'em +done cheaper! But I say as no one can't do it and make a living.' + +As he walked along, talking, between Crass and Slyme, the old man +became very excited. + +'But we 'adn't nothing to do to speak of, so my son told 'im we'd do +'em for five bob a set, and 'e said 'e'd let us know, but we ain't +'eard nothing from 'im yet, so I thought I'd try and see 'im tonight.' + +Well, you'll find 'im in there now,' said Slyme with a peculiar look, +and walking faster. 'Good night.' + +'I won't take 'em on for no less!' cried the old man as he turned back. +I've got my livin' to get, and my son's got 'is wife and little 'uns to +keep. We can't work for nothing!' + +'Certainly not,' said Crass, glad to get away at last. 'Good night, +and good luck to you.' + +As soon as they were out of hearing, they both burst out laughing at +the old man's vehemence. + +'Seemed quite upset about it,' said Slyme; and they laughed again. + +They now left the main road and pursued their way through a number of +badly lighted, mean-looking streets, and finally turning down a kind of +alley, arrived at their destination. On one side of this street was a +row of small houses; facing these were a number of buildings of a +miscellaneous description--sheds and stables; and beyond these a plot +of waste ground on which could be seen, looming weirdly through the +dusk, a number of empty carts and waggons with their shafts resting on +the ground or reared up into the air. Threading their way carefully +through these and avoiding as much as possible the mud, pools of water, +and rubbish which covered the ground, they arrived at a large gate +fastened with a padlock. Applying the key, Crass swung back the gate +and they found themselves in a large yard filled with building +materials and plant, ladders, huge tressels, planks and beams of wood, +hand-carts, and wheelbarrows, heaps of sand and mortar and innumerable +other things that assumed strange fantastic shapes in the +semi-darkness. Crates and packing cases, lengths of iron guttering and +rain-pipes, old door-frames and other woodwork that had been taken from +buildings where alterations had been made. And over all these things, +a gloomy, indistinct and shapeless mass, rose the buildings and sheds +that comprised Rushton & Co.'s workshop. + +Crass struck a match, and Slyme, stooping down, drew a key from a +crevice in the wall near one of the doors, which he unlocked, and they +entered. Crass struck another match and lit the gas at the jointed +bracket fixed to the wall. This was the paint-shop. At one end was a +fireplace without a grate but with an iron bar fixed across the +blackened chimney for the purpose of suspending pails or pots over the +fire, which was usually made of wood on the hearthstone. All round the +walls of the shop--which had once been whitewashed, but were now +covered with smears of paint of every colour where the men had 'rubbed +out' their brushes--were rows of shelves with kegs of paint upon them. +In front of the window was a long bench covered with an untidy litter +of dirty paint-pots, including several earthenware mixing vessels or +mortars, the sides of these being thickly coated with dried paint. +Scattered about the stone floor were a number of dirty pails, either +empty or containing stale whitewash; and standing on a sort of low +platform or shelf at one end of the shop were four large round tanks +fitted with taps and labelled 'Boiled Oil', 'Turps', 'Linseed Oil', +'Turps Substitute'. The lower parts of the walls were discoloured with +moisture. The atmosphere was cold and damp and foul with the sickening +odours of the poisonous materials. + +It was in this place that Bert--the apprentice--spent most of his time, +cleaning out pots and pails, during slack periods when there were no +jobs going on outside. + +In the middle of the shop, under a two-armed gas pendant, was another +table or bench, also thickly coated with old, dried paint, and by the +side of this were two large stands on which were hanging up to dry some +of the lathes of the venetian blinds belonging to 'The Cave', which +Crass and Slyme were painting--piecework--in their spare time. The +remainder of the lathes were leaning against the walls or piled in +stacks on the table. + +Crass shivered with cold as he lit the two gas-jets. 'Make a bit of a +fire, Alf, he said, 'while I gets the colour ready.' + +Slyme went outside and presently returned with his arms full of old +wood, which he smashed up and threw into the fireplace; then he took an +empty paint-pot and filled it with turpentine from the big tank and +emptied it over the wood. Amongst the pots on the mixing bench he +found one full of old paint, and he threw this over the wood also, and +in a few minutes he had made a roaring fire. + +Meantime, Crass had prepared the paint and brushes and taken down the +lathes from the drying frames. The two men now proceeded with the +painting of the blinds, working rapidly, each lathe being hung on the +wires of the drying frame after being painted. They talked freely as +they worked, having no fear of being overheard by Rushton or Nimrod. +This job was piecework, so it didn't matter whether they talked or not. +They waxed hilarious over Old Latham's discomfiture and wondered what +he would say if he could see them now. Then the conversation drifted +to the subject of the private characters of the other men who were +employed by Rushton & Co., and an impartial listener--had there been +one there--would have been forced to come to the same conclusion as +Crass and Slyme did: namely, that they themselves were the only two +decent fellows on the firm. There was something wrong or shady about +everybody else. That bloke Barrington, for instance--it was a very +funny business, you know, for a chap like 'im to be workin' as a +labourer, it looked very suspicious. Nobody knowed exactly who 'e was +or where 'e come from, but anyone could tell 'e'd been a toff. It was +very certain 'e'd never bin brought up to work for 'is livin'. The +most probable explanation was that 'e'd committed some crime and bin +disowned by 'is family--pinched some money, or forged a cheque or +something like that. Then there was that Sawkins. He was no class +whatever. It was a well-known fact that he used to go round to +Misery's house nearly every night to tell him every little thing that +had happened on the job during the day! As for Payne, the foreman +carpenter, the man was a perfect fool: he'd find out the difference if +ever he got the sack from Rushton's and went to work for some other +firm! He didn't understand his trade, and he couldn't make a coffin +properly to save 'is life! Then there was that rotter Owen; there was +a bright specimen for yer! An Atheist! didn't believe in no God or +Devil or nothing else. A pretty state of things there would be if +these Socialists could have their own way: for one thing, nobody would +be allowed to work overtime! + +Crass and Slyme worked and talked in this manner till ten o'clock, and +then they extinguished the fire by throwing some water on it--put out +the gas and locked up the shop and the yard, dropping the key of the +latter into the letter-box at Rushton's office on their way home. + +In this way they worked at the blinds nearly every night for three +weeks. + + + +When Saturday arrived the men working at 'The Cave' were again +surprised that nobody was sacked, and they were divided in opinion as +to the reason, some thinking that Nimrod was determined to keep them +all on till the job was finished, so as to get it done as quickly as +possible; and others boldly asserting the truth of a rumour that had +been going about for several days that the firm had another big job in. +Mr Sweater had bought another house; Rushton had to do it up, and they +were all to be kept on to start this other work as soon as 'The Cave' +was finished. Crass knew no more than anyone else and he maintained a +discreet silence, but the fact that he did not contradict the rumour +served to strengthen it. The only foundation that existed for this +report was that Rushton and Misery had been seen looking over the +garden gate of a large empty house near 'The Cave'. But although it +had such an insignificant beginning, the rumour had grown and increased +in detail and importance day by day. That very morning at +breakfast-time, the man on the pail had announced that he had heard on +the very best authority that Mr Sweater had sold all his interest in +the great business that bore his name and was about to retire into +private life, and that he intended to buy up all the house property in +the neighbourhood of 'The Cave'. Another individual--one of the new +hands--said that he had heard someone else--in a public house--say that +Rushton was about to marry one of Sweater's daughters, and that Sweater +intended to give the couple a house to live in, as a wedding present: +but the fact that Rushton was already married and the father of four +children, rather knocked the bottom out of this story, so it was +regretfully dismissed. Whatever the reason, the fact remained that +nobody had been discharged, and when pay-time arrived they set out for +the office in high spirits. + +That evening, the weather being fine, Slyme went out as usual to his +open-air meeting, but Easton departed from HIS usual custom of rushing +off to the 'Cricketers' directly he had had his tea, having on this +occasion promised to wait for Ruth and to go with her to do the +marketing. The baby was left at home alone, asleep in the cradle. + +By the time they had made all their purchases they had a fairly heavy +load. Easton carried the string-bag containing the potatoes and other +vegetables, and the meat, and Ruth, the groceries. On their way home, +they had to pass the 'Cricketers' and just before they reached that +part of their journey they met Mr and Mrs Crass, who were also out +marketing. They both insisted on Easton and Ruth going in to have a +drink with them. Ruth did not want to go, but she allowed herself to +be persuaded for she could see that Easton was beginning to get angry +with her for refusing. Crass had on a new overcoat and a new hat, with +dark grey trousers and yellow boots, and a 'stand-up' collar with a +bright blue tie. His wife--a fat, vulgar-looking, well-preserved woman +about forty--was arrayed in a dark red 'motor' costume, with hat to +match. Both Easton and Ruth--whose best clothes had all been pawned to +raise the money to pay the poor rate--felt very mean and shabby before +them. + +When they got inside, Crass paid for the first round of drinks, a pint +of Old Six for himself; the same for Easton, half a pint for Mrs Easton +and threepenny-worth of gin for Mrs Crass. + +The Besotted Wretch was there, just finishing a game of hooks and rings +with the Semi-drunk--who had called round on the day after he was +thrown out, to apologize for his conduct to the Old Dear, and had since +then become one of the regular customers. Philpot was absent. He had +been there that afternoon, so the Old Dear said, but he had gone home +about five o'clock, and had not been back since. He was almost sure to +look in again in the course of the evening. + +Although the house was not nearly so full as it would have been if +times had been better, there was a large number of people there, for +the 'Cricketers' was one of the most popular houses in the town. +Another thing that helped to make them busy was the fact that two other +public houses in the vicinity had recently been closed up. There were +people in all the compartments. Some of the seats in the public bar +were occupied by women, some young and accompanied by their husbands, +some old and evidently sodden with drink. In one corner of the public +bar, drinking beer or gin with a number of young fellows, were three +young girls who worked at a steam laundry in the neighbourhood. Two +large, fat, gipsy-looking women: evidently hawkers, for on the floor +beside them were two baskets containing bundles of +flowers--chrysanthemums and Michaelmas daisies. There were also two +very plainly and shabbily dressed women about thirty-five years of age, +who were always to be found there on Saturday nights, drinking with any +man who was willing to pay for them. The behaviour of these two women +was very quiet and their manners unobtrusive. They seemed to realize +that they were there only on sufferance, and their demeanour was +shamefaced and humble. + +The majority of the guests were standing. The floor was sprinkled with +sawdust which served to soak up the beer that slopped out of the +glasses of those whose hands were too unsteady to hold them upright. +The air was foul with the smell of beer, spirits and tobacco smoke, and +the uproar was deafening, for nearly everyone was talking at the same +time, their voices clashing discordantly with the strains of the +Polyphone, which was playing 'The Garden of Your Heart'. In one corner +a group of men convulsed with laughter at the details of a dirty story +related by one of their number. Several impatient customers were +banging the bottoms of their empty glasses or pewters on the counter +and shouting their orders for more beer. Oaths, curses and obscene +expressions resounded on every hand, coming almost as frequently from +the women as the men. And over all the rattle of money, the ringing of +the cash register. The clinking and rattling of the glasses and pewter +pots as they were being washed, and the gurgling noise made by the beer +as it poured into the drinking vessels from the taps of the beer +engine, whose handles were almost incessantly manipulated by the +barman, the Old Dear and the glittering landlady, whose silken blouse, +bejewelled hair, ears, neck and fingers scintillated gloriously in the +blaze of the gaslight. + +The scene was so novel and strange to Ruth that she felt dazed and +bewildered. Previous to her marriage she had been a total abstainer, +but since then she had occasionally taken a glass of beer with Easton +for company's sake with their Sunday dinner at home; but it was +generally Easton who went out and bought the beer in a jug. Once or +twice she had bought it herself at an Off Licence beer-shop near where +they lived, but she had never before been in a public house to drink. +She was so confused and ill at ease that she scarcely heard or +understood Mrs Crass, who talked incessantly, principally about their +other residents in North Street where they both resided; and about Mr +Crass. She also promised Ruth to introduce her presently--if he came +in, as he was almost certain to do--to Mr Partaker, one of her two +lodgers a most superior young man, who had been with them now for over +three years and would not leave on any account. In fact, he had been +their lodger in their old house, and when they moved he came with them +to North Street, although it was farther away from his place of +business than their former residence. Mrs Crass talked a lot more of +the same sort of stuff, to which Ruth listened like one in a dream, and +answered with an occasional yes or no. + +Meantime, Crass and Easton--the latter had deposited the string-bag on +the seat at Ruth's side--and the Semi-drunk and the Besotted Wretch, +arranged to play a match of Hooks and Rings, the losers to pay for +drinks for all the party, including the two women. Crass and the +Semi-drunk tossed up for sides. Crass won and picked the Besotted +Wretch, and the game began. It was a one-sided affair from the first, +for Easton and the Semi-drunk were no match for the other two. The end +of it was that Easton and his partner had to pay for the drinks. The +four men had a pint each of four ale, and Mrs Crass had another +threepennyworth of gin. Ruth protested that she did not want any more +to drink, but the others ridiculed this, and both the Besotted Wretch +and the Semi-drunk seemed to regard her unwillingness as a personal +insult, so she allowed them to get her another half-pint of beer, which +she was compelled to drink, because she was conscious that the others +were watching her to see that she did so. + +The Semi-drunk now suggested a return match. He wished to have his +revenge. He was a little out of practice, he said, and was only just +getting his hand in as they were finishing the other game. Crass and +his partner readily assented, and in spite of Ruth's whispered entreaty +that they should return home without further delay, Easton insisted on +joining the game. + +Although they played more carefully than before, and notwithstanding +the fact that the Besotted Wretch was very drunk, Easton and his +partner were again beaten and once more had to pay for the drinks. The +men had a pint each as before. Mrs Crass--upon whom the liquor so far +seemed to have no effect--had another threepennyworth of gin; and Ruth +consented to take another glass of beer on condition that Easton would +come away directly their drinks were finished. Easton agreed to do so, +but instead of keeping his word he began to play a four-handed game of +shove-ha'penny with the other three, the sides and stakes being +arranged as before. + +The liquor was by this time beginning to have some effect upon Ruth: +she felt dizzy and confused. Whenever it was necessary to reply to Mrs +Crass's talk she found some difficulty in articulating the words and +she knew she was not answering very intelligently. Even when Mrs Crass +introduced her to the interesting Mr Partaker, who arrived about this +time, she was scarcely able to collect herself sufficiently to decline +that fascinating gentleman's invitation to have another drink with +himself and Mrs Crass. + +After a time a kind of terror took possession of her, and she resolved +that if Easton would not come when he had finished the game he was +playing, she would go home without him. + +Meantime the game of shove-ha'penny proceeded merrily, the majority of +the male guests crowding round the board, applauding or censuring the +players as occasion demanded. The Semi-drunk was in high glee, for +Crass was not much of a hand at this game, and the Besotted Wretch, +although playing well, was not able to make up for his partner's want +of skill. As the game drew near its end and it became more and more +certain that his opponents would be defeated, the joy of the Semi-drunk +was unbounded, and he challenged them to make it double or quits--a +generous offer which they wisely declined, and shortly afterwards, +seeing that their position was hopeless, they capitulated and prepared +to pay the penalty of the vanquished. + +Crass ordered the drinks and the Besotted Wretch paid half the damage--a +pint of four ale for each of the men and the same as before for the +ladies. The Old Dear executed the order, but by mistake, being very +busy, he served two 'threes' of gin instead of one. Ruth did not want +any more at all, but she was afraid to say so, and she did not like to +make any fuss about it being the wrong drink, especially as they all +assured her that the spirits would do her more good than beer. She did +not want either; she wanted to get away, and would have liked to empty +the stuff out of the glass on the floor, but she was afraid that Mrs +Crass or one of the others might see her doing so, and there might be +some trouble about it. Anyway, it seemed easier to drink this small +quantity of spirits and water than a big glass of beer, the very +thought of which now made her feel ill. She drank the stuff which +Easton handed to her at a single draught and, handing back the empty +glass with a shudder, stood up resolutely. + +'Are you coming home now? You promised you would,' she said. + +'All right: presently,' replied Easton. 'There's plenty of time; it's +not nine yet.' + +'That doesn't matter; it's quite late enough. You know we've left the +child at home alone in the house. You promised you'd come as soon as +you'd finished that other game.' + +'All right, all right,' answered Easton impatiently. 'Just wait a +minute, I want to see this, and then I'll come.' + +'This' was a most interesting problem propounded by Crass, who had +arranged eleven matches side by side on the shove-ha'penny board. The +problem was to take none away and yet leave only nine. Nearly all the +men in the bar were crowding round the shove-ha'penny board, some with +knitted brows and drunken gravity trying to solve the puzzle and others +waiting curiously for the result. Easton crossed over to see how it +was done, and as none of the crowd were able to do the trick, Crass +showed that it could be accomplished by simply arranging the eleven +matches so as to form the word NINE. Everybody said it was very good +indeed, very clever and interesting. But the Semi-drunk and the +Besotted Wretch were reminded by this trick of several others equally +good, and they proceeded to do them; and then the men had another pint +each all round as a reviver after the mental strain of the last few +minutes. + +Easton did not know any tricks himself, but he was an interested +spectator of those done by several others until Ruth came over and +touched his arm. + +'Aren't you coming?' + +'Wait a minute, can't you?' cried Easton roughly. 'What's your hurry?' + +'I don't want to stay here any longer,' said Ruth, hysterically. 'You +said you'd come as soon as you saw that trick. If you don't come, I +shall go home by myself. I don't want to stay in this place any +longer.' + +'Well, go by yourself if you want to!' shouted Easton fiercely, pushing +her away from him. 'I shall stop 'ere as long as I please, and if you +don't like it you can do the other thing.' + +Ruth staggered and nearly fell from the force of the push he gave her, +and the man turned again to the table to watch the Semi-drunk, who was +arranging six matches so as to form the numeral XII, and who said he +could prove that this was equal to a thousand. + +Ruth waited a few minutes longer, and then as Easton took no further +notice of her, she took up the string-bag and the other parcels, and +without staying to say good night to Mrs Crass--who was earnestly +conversing with the interesting Partaker--she with some difficulty +opened the door and went out into the street. The cold night air felt +refreshing and sweet after the foul atmosphere of the public house, but +after a little while she began to feel faint and dizzy, and was +conscious also that she was walking unsteadily, and she fancied that +people stared at her strangely as they passed. The parcels felt very +heavy and awkward to carry, and the string-bag seemed as if it were +filled with lead. + +Although under ordinary circumstances it was only about ten minutes' +walk home from here, she resolved to go by one of the trams which +passed by the end of North Street. With this intention, she put down +her bag on the pavement at the stopping-place, and waited, resting her +hand on the iron pillar at the corner of the street, where a little +crowd of people were standing evidently with the same object as +herself. Two trains passed without stopping, for they were already +full of passengers, a common circumstance on Saturday nights. The next +one stopped, and several persons alighted, and then ensued a fierce +struggle amongst the waiting crowd for the vacant seats. Men and women +pushed, pulled and almost fought, shoving their fists and elbows into +each other's sides and breasts and faces. Ruth was quickly thrust +aside and nearly knocked down, and the tram, having taken aboard as +many passengers as it had accommodation for, passed on. She waited for +the next one, and the same scene was enacted with the same result for +her, and then, reflecting that if she had not stayed for these trams +she might have been home by now, she determined to resume her walk. +The parcels felt heavier than ever, and she had not proceeded very far +before she was compelled to put the bag down again upon the pavement, +outside an empty house. + +Leaning against the railings, she felt very tired and ill. Everything +around her--the street, the houses, the traffic--seemed vague and +shadowy and unreal. Several people looked curiously at her as they +passed, but by this time she was scarcely conscious of their scrutiny. + +Slyme had gone that evening to the usual 'open-air' conducted by the +Shining Light Mission. The weather being fine, they had a most +successful meeting, the disciples, including Hunter, Rushton, Sweater, +Didlum, and Mrs Starvem--Ruth's former mistress--assembled in great +force so as to be able to deal more effectively with any infidels or +hired critics or drunken scoffers who might try to disturb the +proceedings; and--possibly as an evidence of how much real faith there +was in them--they had also arranged to have a police officer in +attendance, to protect them from what they called the 'Powers of +Darkness'. One might be excused for thinking that--if they really +believed--they would have relied rather upon those powers of Light +which they professed to represent on this planet to protect them +without troubling to call in the aid of such a 'worldly' force as the +police. However, it came to pass that on this occasion the only +infidels present were those who were conducting the meeting, but as +these consisted for the most part of members of the chapel, it will be +seen that the infidel fraternity was strongly represented. + +On his way home after the meeting Slyme had to pass by the 'Cricketers' +and as he drew near the place he wondered if Easton was there, but he +did not like to go and look in, because he was afraid someone might see +him coming away and perhaps think he had been in to drink. Just as he +arrived opposite the house another man opened the door of the public +bar and entered, enabling Slyme to catch a momentary glimpse of the +interior, where he saw Easton and Crass with a number of others who +were strangers to him, laughing and drinking together. + +Slyme hurried away; it had turned very cold, and he was anxious to get +home. As he approached the place where the trams stopped to take up +passengers and saw that there was a tram in sight he resolved to wait +for it and ride home: but when the tram arrived and there were only one +or two seats vacant, and although he did his best to secure one of +these he was unsuccessful, and after a moment's hesitation he decided +that it would be quicker to walk than to wait for the next one. He +accordingly resumed his journey, but he had not gone very far when he +saw a small crowd of people on the pavement on the other side of the +road outside an unoccupied house, and although he was in a hurry to get +home he crossed over to see what was the matter. There were about +twenty people standing there, and in the centre close to the railing +there were three or four women whom Slyme could not see although he +could hear their voices. + +'What's up?' he inquired of a man on the edge of the crowd. + +'Oh, nothing much,' returned the other. 'Some young woman; she's +either ill, come over faint, or something--or else she's had a drop too +much.' + +'Quite a respectable-looking young party, too,' said another man. + +Several young fellows in the crowd were amusing themselves by making +suggestive jokes about the young woman and causing some laughter by the +expressions of mock sympathy. + +'Doesn't anyone know who she is?' said the second man who had spoken in +reply to Slyme's inquiry. + +'No,' said a woman who was standing a little nearer the middle of the +crowd. 'And she won't say where she lives.' + +'She'll be all right now she's had that glass of soda,' said another +man, elbowing his way out of the crowd. As this individual came out, +Slyme managed to work himself a little further into the group of +people, and he uttered an involuntary cry of astonishment as he caught +sight of Ruth, very pale, and looking very ill, as she stood clasping +one of the railings with her left hand and holding the packages of +groceries in the other. She had by this time recovered sufficiently to +feel overwhelmed with shame and confusion before the crowd of strangers +who hemmed her in on every side, and some of whom she could hear +laughing and joking about her. It was therefore with a sensation of +intense relief and gratitude that she saw Slyme's familiar face and +heard his friendly voice as he forced his way through to her side. + +'I can walk home all right now,' she stammered in reply to his anxious +questioning. 'If you wouldn't mind carrying some of these things for +me.' + +He insisted on taking all the parcels, and the crowd, having jumped to +the conclusion that he was the young woman's husband began to dwindle +away, one of the jokers remarking 'It's all over!' in a loud voice as +he took himself off. + +It was only about seven minutes' walk home from there, and as the +streets along which they had to pass were not very brilliantly lighted, +Ruth was able to lean on Slyme's arm most of the way. When they +arrived home, after she had removed her hat, he made her sit down in +the armchair by the fire, which was burning brightly, and the kettle +was singing on the hob, for she had banked up the fire with cinders and +small coal before she went out. + +The baby was still asleep in the cradle, but his slumbers had evidently +not been of the most restful kind, for he had kicked all the bedclothes +off him and was lying all uncovered. Ruth obeyed passively when Slyme +told her to sit down, and, lying back languidly in the armchair, she +watched him through half-closed eyes and with a slight flush on her +face as he deftly covered the sleeping child with the bedclothes and +settled him more comfortably in the cot. + +Slyme now turned his attention to the fire, and as he placed the kettle +upon it he remarked: 'As soon as the water boils I'll make you some +strong tea.' + +During their walk home she had acquainted Slyme with the cause of her +being in the condition in which he found her in the street, and as she +reclined in the armchair, drowsily watching him, she wondered what +would have happened to her if he had not passed by when he did. + +'Are you feeling better?' he asked, looking down at her. + +'Yes, thanks. I feel quite well now; but I'm afraid I've given you a +lot of trouble.' + +'No, you haven't. Nothing I can do for you is a trouble to me. But +don't you think you'd better take your jacket off? Here, let me help +you.' + +It took a very long time to get this jacket off, because whilst he was +helping her, Slyme kissed her repeatedly and passionately as she lay +limp and unresisting in his arms. + + + +Chapter 25 + +The Oblong + + +During the following week the work at 'The Cave' progressed rapidly +towards completion, although, the hours of daylight being so few, the +men worked only from 8 A.M. till 4 P.M. and they had their breakfasts +before they came. This made 40 hours a week, so that those who were +paid sevenpence an hour earned L1.3.4. Those who got +sixpence-halfpenny drew L1.1.8. Those whose wages were fivepence an +hour were paid the princely sum of 16/8d. for their week's hard labour, +and those whose rate was fourpence-halfpenny 'picked up' 15/-. + +And yet there are people who have the insolence to say that Drink is +the cause of poverty. + +And many of the persons who say this, spend more money than that on +drink themselves--every day of their useless lives. + +By Tuesday night all the inside was finished with the exception of the +kitchen and scullery. The painting of the kitchen had been delayed +owing to the non-arrival of the new cooking range, and the scullery was +still used as the paint shop. The outside work was also nearly +finished: all the first coating was done and the second coating was +being proceeded with. According to the specification, all the outside +woodwork was supposed to have three coats, and the guttering, +rain-pipes and other ironwork two coats, but Crass and Hunter had +arranged to make two coats do for most of the windows and woodwork, and +all the ironwork was to be made to do with one coat only. The windows +were painted in two colours: the sashes dark green and the frames +white. All the rest--gables, doors, railings, guttering, etc.--was +dark green; and all the dark green paint was made with boiled linseed +oil and varnish; no turpentine being allowed to be used on this part of +the work. + +'This is some bloody fine stuff to 'ave to use, ain't it?' remarked +Harlow to Philpot on Wednesday morning. 'It's more like a lot of +treacle than anything else.' + +'Yes: and it won't arf blister next summer when it gets a bit of sun on +it,' replied Philpot with a grin. + +'I suppose they're afraid that if they was to put a little turps in, it +wouldn't bear out, and they'd 'ave to give it another coat.' + +'You can bet yer life that's the reason,' said Philpot. 'But all the +same I mean to pinch a drop to put in mine as soon as Crass is gorn.' + +'Gorn where?' + +'Why, didn't you know? there's another funeral on today? Didn't you +see that corfin plate what Owen was writing in the drorin'-room last +Saturday morning?' + +'No, I wasn't 'ere. Don't you remember I was sent away to do a ceilin' +and a bit of painting over at Windley?' + +'Oh, of course; I forgot,' exclaimed Philpot. + +'I reckon Crass and Slyme must be making a small fortune out of all +these funerals,' said Harlow. 'This makes the fourth in the last +fortnight. What is it they gets for 'em?' + +'A shillin' for taking' 'ome the corfin and liftin' in the corpse, and +four bob for the funeral--five bob altogether.' + +'That's a bit of all right, ain't it?' said Harlow. 'A couple of them +in a week besides your week's wages, eh? Five bob for two or three +hours work!' + +'Yes, the money's all right, mate, but they're welcome to it for my +part. I don't want to go messin' about with no corpses,' replied +Philpot with a shudder. + +'Who is this last party what's dead?' asked Harlow after a pause. + +'It's a parson what used to belong to the "Shining Light" Chapel. He'd +been abroad for 'is 'ollerdays--to Monte Carlo. It seems 'e was ill +before 'e went away, but the change did 'im a lot of good; in fact, 'e +was quite recovered, and 'e was coming back again. But while 'e was +standin' on the platform at Monte Carlo Station waitin' for the train, +a porter runned into 'im with a barrer load o' luggage, and 'e blowed +up.' + +'Blowed up?' + +'Yes,' repeated Philpot. 'Blowed up! Busted! Exploded! All into +pieces. But they swep' 'em all up and put it in a corfin and it's to +be planted this afternoon.' + +Harlow maintained an awestruck silence, and Philpot continued: + +'I had a drink the other night with a butcher bloke what used to serve +this parson with meat, and we was talkin' about what a strange sort of +death it was, but 'e said 'e wasn't at all surprised to 'ear of it; the +only thing as 'e wondered at was that the man didn't blow up long ago, +considerin' the amount of grub as 'e used to make away with. He ses +the quantities of stuff as 'e's took there and seen other tradesmen +take was something chronic. Tons of it!' + +'What was the parson's name?' asked Harlow. + +'Belcher. You must 'ave noticed 'im about the town. A very fat chap,' +replied Philpot. 'I'm sorry you wasn't 'ere on Saturday to see the +corfin plate. Frank called me in to see the wordin' when 'e'd finished +it. It had on: "Jonydab Belcher. Born January 1st, 1849. Ascended, +December 8th, 19--"' + +'Oh, I know the bloke now!' cried Harlow. 'I remember my youngsters +bringin' 'ome a subscription list what they'd got up at the Sunday +School to send 'im away for a 'ollerday because 'e was ill, and I gave +'em a penny each to put on their cards because I didn't want 'em to +feel mean before the other young 'uns.' + +'Yes, it's the same party. Two or three young 'uns asked me to give +'em something to put on at the time. And I see they've got another +subscription list on now. I met one of Newman's children yesterday and +she showed it to me. It's for an entertainment and a Christmas Tree +for all the children what goes to the Sunday School, so I didn't mind +giving just a trifle for anything like that.'... + +'Seems to be gettin' colder, don't it?' + +'It's enough to freeze the ears orf a brass monkey!' remarked Easton as +he descended from a ladder close by and, placing his pot of paint on +the pound, began to try to warm his hands by rubbing and beating them +together. + +He was trembling, and his teeth were chattering with cold. + +'I could just do with a nice pint of beer, now,' he said as he stamped +his feet on the pound. + +'That's just what I was thinkin',' said Philpot, wistfully, 'and what's +more, I mean to 'ave one, too, at dinner-time. I shall nip down to the +"Cricketers". Even if I don't get back till a few minutes after one, +it won't matter, because Crass and Nimrod will be gorn to the funeral.' + +'Will you bring me a pint back with you, in a bottle?' asked Easton. + +'Yes, certainly,' said Philpot. + +Harlow said nothing. He also would have liked a pint of beer, but, as +was usual with him, he had not the necessary cash. Having restored the +circulation to a certain extent, they now resumed their work, and only +just in time, for a few minutes afterwards they observed Misery peeping +round the corner of the house at them and they wondered how long he had +been there, and whether he had overheard their conversation. + +At twelve o'clock Crass and Slyme cleared off in a great hurry, and a +little while afterwards, Philpot took off his apron and put on his coat +to go to the 'Cricketers'. When the others found out where he was +going, several of them asked him to bring back a drink for them, and +then someone suggested that all those who wanted some beer should give +twopence each. This was done: one shilling and fourpence was collected +and given to Philpot, who was to bring back a gallon of beer in a jar. +He promised to get back as soon as ever he could, and some of the +shareholders decided not to drink any tea with their dinners, but to +wait for the beer, although they knew that it would be nearly time to +resume work before he could get back. It would be a quarter to one at +the very earliest. + +The minutes dragged slowly by, and after a while the only man on the +job who had a watch began to lose his temper and refused to answer any +more inquiries concerning the time. So presently Bert was sent up to +the top of the house to look at a church clock which was visible +therefrom, and when he came down he reported that it was ten minutes to +one. + +Symptoms of anxiety now began to manifest themselves amongst the +shareholders, several of whom went down to the main road to see if +Philpot was yet in sight, but each returned with the same report--they +could see nothing of him. + +No one was formally 'in charge' of the job during Crass's absence, but +they all returned to their work promptly at one because they feared +that Sawkins or some other sneak might report any irregularity to Crass +or Misery. + +At a quarter-past one, Philpot was still missing and the uneasiness of +the shareholders began to develop into a panic. Some of them plainly +expressed the opinion that he had gone on the razzle with the money. As +the time wore on, this became the general opinion. At two o'clock, all +hope of his return having been abandoned, two or three of the +shareholders went and drank some of the cold tea. + +Their fears were only too well founded, for they saw no more of Philpot +till the next morning, when he arrived looking very sheepish and +repentant and promised to refund all the money on Saturday. He also +made a long, rambling statement from which it appeared that on his way +to the 'Cricketers' he met a couple of chaps whom he knew who were out +of work, and he invited them to come and have a drink. When they got +to the pub, they found there the Semi-drunk and the Besotted Wretch. +One drink led to another, and then they started arguing, and he had +forgotten all about the gallon of beer until he woke up this morning. + +Whilst Philpot was making this explanation they were putting on their +aprons and blouses, and Crass was serving out the lots of colour. Slyme +took no part in the conversation, but got ready as quickly as possible +and went outside to make a start. The reason for this haste soon +became apparent to some of the others, for they noticed that he had +selected and commenced painting a large window that was so situated as +to be sheltered from the keen wind that was blowing. + +The basement of the house was slightly below the level of the ground +and there was a sort of a trench or area about three feet deep in front +of the basement windows. The banks of this trench were covered with +rose trees and evergreens, and the bottom was a mass of slimy, +evil-smelling, rain-sodden earth, foul with the excrement of nocturnal +animals. To second-coat these basement windows, Philpot and Harlow had +to get down into and stand in all this filth, which soaked through the +worn and broken soles of their boots. As they worked, the thorns of +the rose trees caught and tore their clothing and lacerated the flesh +of their half-frozen hands. + +Owen and Easton were working on ladders doing the windows immediately +above Philpot and Harlow, Sawkins, on another ladder, was painting one +of the gables, and the other men were working at different parts of the +outside of the house. The boy Bert was painting the iron railings of +the front fence. The weather was bitterly cold, the sun was concealed +by the dreary expanse of grey cloud that covered the wintry sky. + +As they stood there working most of the time they were almost perfectly +motionless, the only part of their bodies that were exercised being +their right arms. The work they were now doing required to be done +very carefully and deliberately, otherwise the glass would be 'messed +up' or the white paint of the frames would 'run into' the dark green of +the sashes, both colours being wet at the same time, each man having +two pots of paint and two sets of brushes. The wind was not blowing in +sudden gusts, but swept by in a strong, persistent current that +penetrated their clothing and left them trembling and numb with cold. +It blew from the right; and it was all the worse on that account, +because the right arm, being in use, left that side of the body fully +exposed. They were able to keep their left hands in their trousers +pockets and the left arm close to the side most of the time. This made +a lot of difference. + +Another reason why it is worse when the wind strikes upon one from the +right side is that the buttons on a man's coat are always on the right +side, and consequently the wind gets underneath. Philpot realized this +all the more because some of the buttons on his coat and waistcoat were +missing. + +As they worked on, trembling with cold, and with their teeth +chattering, their faces and hands became of that pale violet colour +generally seen on the lips of a corpse. Their eyes became full of +water and the lids were red and inflamed. Philpot's and Harlow's boots +were soon wet through, with the water they absorbed from the damp +ground, and their feet were sore and intensely painful with cold. + +Their hands, of course, suffered the most, becoming so numbed that they +were unable to feel the brushes they held; in fact, presently, as +Philpot was taking a dip of colour, the brush fell from his hand into +the pot; and then, finding that he was unable to move his fingers, he +put his hand into his trousers pocket to thaw, and began to walk about, +stamping his feet upon the ground. His example was quickly followed by +Owen, Easton and Harlow, and they all went round the corner to the +sheltered side of the house where Slyme was working, and began walking +up and down, rubbing their hands, stamping their feet and swinging +their arms to warm themselves. + +'If I thought Nimrod wasn't comin', I'd put my overcoat on and work in +it,' remarked Philpot, 'but you never knows when to expect the b--r, +and if 'e saw me in it, it would mean the bloody push.' + +'It wouldn't interfere with our workin' if we did wear 'em,' said +Easton; 'in fact, we'd be able to work all the quicker if we wasn't so +cold.' + +'Even if Misery didn't come, I suppose Crass would 'ave something to +say if we did put 'em on,' continued Philpot. + +'Well, yer couldn't blame 'im if 'e did say something, could yer?' said +Slyme, offensively. 'Crass would get into a row 'imself if 'Unter came +and saw us workin' in overcoats. It would look ridiclus.' + +Slyme suffered less from the cold than any of them, not only because he +had secured the most sheltered window, but also because he was better +clothed than most of the rest. + +'What's Crass supposed to be doin' inside?' asked Easton as he tramped +up and down, with his shoulders hunched up and his hands thrust deep +into the pockets of his trousers. + +'Blowed if I know,' replied Philpot. 'Messin' about touchin' up or +makin' colour. He never does 'is share of a job like this; 'e knows +'ow to work things all right for 'isself.' + +'What if 'e does? We'd be the same if we was in 'is place, and so +would anybody else,' said Slyme, and added sarcastically: 'Or p'haps +you'd give all the soft jobs to other people and do all the rough +yerself!' + +Slyme knew that, although they were speaking of Crass, they were also +alluding to himself, and as he replied to Philpot he looked slyly at +Owen, who had so far taken no part in the conversation. + +'It's not a question of what we would do,' chimed in Harlow. 'It's a +question of what's fair. If it's not fair for Crass to pick all the +soft jobs for 'imself and leave all the rough for others, the fact that +we might do the same if we 'ad the chance don't make it right.' + +'No one can be blamed for doing the best he can for himself under +existing circumstances,' said Owen in reply to Slyme's questioning +look. That is the principle of the present system--every man for +himself and the devil take the rest. For my own part I don't pretend +to practise unselfishness. I don't pretend to guide my actions by the +rules laid down in the Sermon on the Mount. But it's certainly +surprising to hear you who profess to be a follower of +Christ--advocating selfishness. Or, rather, it would be surprising if +it were not that the name of "Christian" has ceased to signify one who +follows Christ, and has come to mean only liar and hypocrite.' + +Slyme made no answer. Possibly the fact that he was a true believer +enabled him to bear this insult with meekness and humility. + +'I wonder what time it is?' interposed Philpot. + +Slyme looked at his watch. It was nearly ten o'clock. + +'Jesus Christ! Is that all?' growled Easton as they returned to work. +'Two hours more before dinner!' + +Only two more hours, but to these miserable, half-starved, ill-clad +wretches, standing here in the bitter wind that pierced their clothing +and seemed to be tearing at their very hearts and lungs with icy +fingers, it appeared like an eternity. To judge by the eagerness with +which they longed for dinner-time, one might have thought they had some +glorious banquet to look forward to instead of bread and cheese and +onions, or bloaters--and stewed tea. + +Two more hours of torture before dinner; and three more hours after +that. And then, thank God, it would be too dark to see to work any +longer. + +It would have been much better for them if, instead of being 'Freemen', +they had been slaves, and the property, instead of the hirelings, of Mr +Rushton. As it was, HE would not have cared if one or all of them had +become ill or died from the effects of exposure. It would have made no +difference to him. There were plenty of others out of work and on the +verge of starvation who would be very glad to take their places. But +if they had been Rushton's property, such work as this would have been +deferred until it could be done without danger to the health and lives +of the slaves; or at any rate, even if it were proceeded with during +such weather, their owner would have seen to it that they were properly +clothed and fed; he would have taken as much care of them as he would +of his horse. + +People always take great care of their horses. If they were to +overwork a horse and make it ill, it would cost something for medicine +and the veterinary surgeon, to say nothing of the animal's board and +lodging. If they were to work their horses to death, they would have +to buy others. But none of these considerations applies to workmen. If +they work a man to death they can get another for nothing at the corner +of the next street. They don't have to buy him; all they have to do is +to give him enough money to provide him with food and clothing--of a +kind--while he is working for them. If they only make him ill, they +will not have to feed him or provide him with medical care while he is +laid up. He will either go without these things or pay for them +himself. At the same time it must be admitted that the workman scores +over both the horse and the slave, inasmuch as he enjoys the priceless +blessing of Freedom. If he does not like the hirer's conditions he +need not accept them. He can refuse to work, and he can go and starve. +There are no ropes on him. He is a Free man. He is the Heir of all +the Ages. He enjoys perfect Liberty. He has the right to choose +freely which he will do--Submit or Starve. Eat dirt or eat nothing. + +The wind blew colder and colder. The sky, which at first had shown +small patches of blue through rifts in the masses of clouds, had now +become uniformly grey. There was every indication of an impending fall +of snow. + +The men perceived this with conflicting feelings. If it did commence +to snow, they would not be able to continue this work, and therefore +they found themselves involuntarily wishing that it would snow, or +rain, or hail, or anything that would stop the work. But on the other +hand, if the weather prevented them getting on with the outside, some +of them would have to 'stand off', because the inside was practically +finished. None of them wished to lose any time if they could possibly +help it, because there were only ten days more before Christmas. + +The morning slowly wore away and the snow did not fall. The hands +worked on in silence, for they were in no mood for talking, and not +only that, but they were afraid that Hunter or Rushton or Crass might +be watching them from behind some bush or tree, or through some of the +windows. This dread possessed them to such an extent that most of them +were almost afraid even to look round, and kept steadily on at work. +None of them wished to spoil his chance of being kept on to help to do +the other house that it was reported Rushton & Co. were going to 'do +up' for Mr Sweater. + +Twelve o'clock came at last, and Crass's whistle had scarcely ceased to +sound before they all assembled in the kitchen before the roaring fire. +Sweater had sent in two tons of coal and had given orders that fires +were to be lit every day in nearly every room to make the house +habitable by Christmas. + +'I wonder if it's true as the firm's got another job to do for old +Sweater?' remarked Harlow as he was toasting a bloater on the end of +the pointed stick. + +'True? No!' said the man on the pail scornfully. 'It's all bogy. You +know that empty 'ouse as they said Sweater 'ad bought--the one that +Rushton and Nimrod was seen lookin' at?' + +'Yes,' replied Harlow. The other men listened with evident interest. +'Well, they wasn't pricing it up after all! The landlord of that 'ouse +is abroad, and there was some plants in the garden as Rushton thought +'e'd like, and 'e was tellin' Misery which ones 'e wanted. And +afterwards old Pontius Pilate came up with Ned Dawson and a truck. They +made two or three journeys and took bloody near everything in the +garden as was worth takin'. What didn't go to Rushton's place went to +'Unter's.' + +The disappointment of their hopes for another job was almost forgotten +in their interest in this story. + +'Who told you about it?' said Harlow. + +'Ned Dawson 'imself. It's right enough what I say. Ask 'im.' + +Ned Dawson, usually called 'Bundy's mate', had been away from the house +for a few days down at the yard doing odd jobs, and had only come back +to the 'Cave' that morning. On being appealed to, he corroborated Dick +Wantley's statement. + +'They'll be gettin' theirselves into trouble if they ain't careful,' +remarked Easton. + +'Oh, no they won't, Rushton's too artful for that. It seems the agent +is a pal of 'is, and they worked it between 'em.' + +'Wot a bloody cheek, though!' exclaimed Harlow. + +'Oh, that's nothing to some of the things I've known 'em do before +now,' said the man on the pail. 'Why, don't you remember, back in the +summer, that carved hoak hall table as Rushton pinched out of that +'ouse on Grand Parade?' + +'Yes; that was a bit of all right too, wasn't it?' cried Philpot, and +several of the others laughed. + +'You know, that big 'ouse we did up last summer--No. 596,' Wantley +continued, for the benefit of those not 'in the know'. 'Well, it 'ad +bin empty for a long time and we found this 'ere table in a cupboard +under the stairs. A bloody fine table it was too. One of them bracket +tables what you fix to the wall, without no legs. It 'ad a 'arf-round +marble top to it, and underneath was a carved hoak figger, a mermaid, +with 'er arms up over 'er 'ead 'oldin' up the table top--something +splendid!' The man on the pail waxed enthusiastic as he thought of it. +'Must 'ave been worth at least five quid. Well, just as we pulled this +'ere table out, who should come in but Rushton, and when 'e seen it, 'e +tells Crass to cover it over with a sack and not to let nobody see it. +And then 'e clears orf to the shop and sends the boy down with the +truck and 'as it took up to 'is own 'ouse, and it's there now, fixed in +the front 'all. I was sent up there a couple of months ago to paint +and varnish the lobby doors and I seen it meself. There's a pitcher +called "The Day of Judgement" 'angin' on the wall just over it--thunder +and lightning and earthquakes and corpses gettin' up out o' their +graves--something bloody 'orrible! And underneath the picture is a card +with a tex out of the Bible--"Christ is the 'ead of this 'ouse: the +unknown guest at every meal. The silent listener to every +conversation." I was workin' there for three or four days and I got to +know it orf by 'eart.' + +'Well, that takes the biskit, don't it?' said Philpot. + +'Yes: but the best of it was,' the man on the pail proceeded, 'the best +of it was, when ole Misery 'eard about the table, 'e was so bloody wild +because 'e didn't get it 'imself that 'e went upstairs and pinched one +of the venetian blinds and 'ad it took up to 'is own 'ouse by the boy, +and a few days arterwards one of the carpenters 'ad to go and fix it up +in 'is bedroom.' + +'And wasn't it never found out?' inquired Easton. + +'Well, there was a bit of talk about it. The agent wanted to know +where it was, but Pontius Pilate swore black and white as there 'adn't +been no blind in that room, and the end of it was that the firm got the +order to supply a new one.' + +'What I can't understand is, who did the table belong to?' said Harlow. + +'It was a fixture belongin' to the 'ouse,' replied Wantley. 'But I +suppose the former tenants had some piece of furniture of their own +that they wanted to put in the 'all where this table was fixed, so they +took it down and stored it away in this 'ere cupboard, and when they +left the 'ouse I suppose they didn't trouble to put it back again. +Anyway, there was the mark on the wall where it used to be fixed, but +when we did the staircase down, the place was papered over, and I +suppose the landlord or the agent never give the table a thought. +Anyhow, Rushton got away with it all right.' + +A number of similar stories were related by several others concerning +the doings of different employers they had worked for, but after a time +the conversation reverted to the subject that was uppermost in their +thoughts--the impending slaughter, and the improbability of being able +to obtain another job, considering the large number of men who were +already out of employment. + +'I can't make it out, myself,' remarked Easton. 'Things seems to get +worse every year. There don't seem to be 'arf the work about that +there used to be, and even what there is is messed up anyhow, as if the +people who 'as it done can't afford to pay for it.' + +'Yes,' said Harlow; 'that's true enough. Why, just look at the work +that's in one o' them 'ouses on the Grand Parade. People must 'ave 'ad +more money to spend in those days, you know; all those massive curtain +cornishes over the drawing- and dining-room winders--gilded solid! +Why, nowadays they'd want all the bloody 'ouse done down right +through--inside and out, for the money it cost to gild one of them.' + +'It seems that nearly everybody is more or less 'ard up nowadays,' said +Philpot. 'I'm jiggered if I can understand it, but there it is.' + +'You should ast Owen to explain it to yer,' remarked Crass with a +jeering laugh. ''E knows all about wot's the cause of poverty, but 'e +won't tell nobody. 'E's been GOIN' to tell us wot it is for a long +time past, but it don't seem to come orf.' + +Crass had not yet had an opportunity of producing the Obscurer cutting, +and he made this remark in the hope of turning the conversation into a +channel that would enable him to do so. But Owen did not respond, and +went on reading his newspaper. + +'We ain't 'ad no lectures at all lately, 'ave we?' said Harlow in an +injured tone. 'I think it's about time Owen explained what the real +cause of poverty is. I'm beginning to get anxious about it.' + +The others laughed. + + + +When Philpot had finished eating his dinner he went out of the kitchen +and presently returned with a small pair of steps, which he opened and +placed in a corner of the room, with the back of the steps facing the +audience. + +'There you are, me son!' he exclaimed to Owen. 'There's a pulpit for +yer.' + +'Yes! come on 'ere!' cried Crass, feeling in his waistcoat pocket for +the cutting. 'Tell us wot's the real cause of poverty.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' shouted the man on the pail. 'Git up into the bloody +pulpit and give us a sermon.' + +As Owen made no response to the invitations, the crowd began to hoot +and groan. + +'Come on, man,' whispered Philpot, winking his goggle eye persuasively +at Owen. 'Come on, just for a bit of turn, to pass the time away.' + +Owen accordingly ascended the steps--much to the secret delight of +Crass--and was immediately greeted with a round of enthusiastic +applause. + +'There you are, you see,' said Philpot, addressing the meeting. 'It's +no use booin' and threatenin', because 'e's one of them lecturers wot +can honly be managed with kindness. If it 'adn't a bin for me, 'e +wouldn't 'ave agreed to speak at all.' + +Philpot having been unanimously elected chairman, proposed by Harlow +and seconded by the man on the pail, Owen commenced: + +'Mr Chairman and gentlemen: + +'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking, it is with some degree of +hesitation that I venture to address myself to such a large, +distinguished, fashionable, and intelligent looking audience as that +which I have the honour of seeing before me on the present occasion.' +(Applause.) + +'One of the finest speakers I've ever 'eard!' remarked the man on the +pail in a loud whisper to the chairman, who motioned him to be silent. + +Owen continued: + +'In some of my previous lectures I have endeavoured to convince you +that money is in itself of no value and of no real use whatever. In +this I am afraid I have been rather unsuccessful.' + +'Not a bit of it, mate,' cried Crass, sarcastically. 'We all agrees +with it.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' shouted Easton. 'If a bloke was to come in 'ere now and +orfer to give me a quid--I'd refuse it!' + +'So would I,' said Philpot. + +'Well, whether you agree or not, the fact remains. A man might possess +so much money that, in England, he would be comparatively rich, and yet +if he went to some country where the cost of living is very high he +would find himself in a condition of poverty. Or one might conceivably +be in a place where the necessaries of life could not be bought for +money at all. Therefore it is more conducive to an intelligent +understanding of the subject if we say that to be rich consists not +necessarily in having much money, but in being able to enjoy an +abundance of the things that are made by work; and that poverty +consists not merely in being without money, but in being short of the +necessaries and comforts of life--or in other words in being short of +the Benefits of Civilization, the things that are all, without +exception, produced by work. Whether you agree or not with anything +else that I say, you will all admit that that is our condition at the +present time. We do not enjoy a full share of the benefits of +civilization--we are all in a state of more or less abject poverty.' + +'Question!' cried Crass, and there were loud murmurs of indignant +dissent from several quarters as Owen proceeded: + +'How does it happen that we are so short of the things that are made by +work?' + +'The reason why we're short of the things that's made by work,' +interrupted Crass, mimicking Owen's manner, 'is that we ain't got the +bloody money to buy 'em.' + +'Yes,' said the man on the pail; 'and as I said before, if all the +money in the country was shared out equal today according to Owen's +ideas--in six months' time it would be all back again in the same 'ands +as it is now, and what are you goin' to do then?' + +'Share again, of course.' + +This answer came derisively from several places at the same instant, +and then they all began speaking at once, vying with each other in +ridiculing the foolishness of 'them there Socialists', whom they called +'The Sharers Out'. + +Barrington was almost the only one who took no part in the +conversation. He was seated in his customary place and, as usual, +silently smoking, apparently oblivious to his surroundings. + +'I never said anything about "sharing out all the money",' said Owen +during a lull in the storm, 'and I don't know of any Socialist who +advocates anything of the kind. Can any of you tell me the name of +someone who proposes to do so?' + +No one answered, as Owen repeated his inquiry, this time addressing +himself directly to Crass, who had been one of the loudest in +denouncing and ridiculing the 'Sharers Out'. Thus cornered, Crass--who +knew absolutely nothing about the subject--for a few moments looked +rather foolish. Then he began to talk in a very loud voice: + +'Why, it's a well-known fact. Everybody knows that's what they wants. +But they take bloody good care they don't act up to it theirselves, +though. Look at them there Labour members of Parliament--a lot of +b--rs what's too bloody lazy to work for their livin'! What the bloody +'ell was they before they got there? Only workin' men, the same as you +and me! But they've got the gift o' the gab and--' + +'Yes, we know all about that,' said Owen, 'but what I'm asking you is +to tell us who advocates taking all the money in the country and +sharing it out equally?' + +'And I say that everybody knows that's what they're after!' shouted +Crass. 'And you know it as well as I do. A fine thing!' he added +indignantly. 'Accordin' to that idear, a bloody scavenger or a farm +labourer ought to get as much wages as you or me!' + +'We can talk about that some other time. What I want to know at +present is--what authority have you for saying that Socialists believe +in sharing out all the money equally amongst all the people?' + +'Well, that's what I've always understood they believed in doing,' said +Crass rather lamely. + +'It's a well-known fact,' said several others. + +'Come to think of it,' continued Crass as he drew the Obscurer cutting +from his waistcoat pocket, 'I've got a little thing 'ere that I've been +goin' to read to yer. It's out of the Obscurer. I'd forgotten all +about it.' + +Remarking that the print was too small for his own eyes, he passed the +slip of paper to Harlow, who read aloud as follows: + + PROVE YOUR PRINCIPLES: OR, LOOK AT BOTH SIDES + + 'I wish I could open your eyes to the true misery of our + condition: injustice, tyranny and oppression!' said a discontented + hack to a weary-looking cob as they stood side by side in unhired + cabs. + + 'I'd rather have them opened to something pleasant, thank you,' + replied the cob. + + 'I am sorry for you. If you could enter into the noble + aspirations--' the hack began. + + 'Talk plain. What would you have?' said the cob, interrupting + him. + + 'What would I have? Why, equality, and share and share alike all + over the world,' said the hack. + + 'You MEAN that?' said the cob. + + 'Of course I do. What right have those sleek, pampered hunters and + racers to their warm stables and high feed, their grooms and + jockeys? It is really heart-sickening to think of it,' replied + the hack. + + 'I don't know but you may be right,' said the cob, 'and to show + I'm in earnest, as no doubt you are, let me have half the good + beans you have in your bag, and you shall have half the musty oats + and chaff I have in mine. There's nothing like proving one's + principles.' + Original Parables. By Mrs Prosier. + +'There you are!' cried several voices. + +'What does that mean?' cried Crass, triumphantly. 'Why don't you go +and share your wages with the chaps what's out of work?' + +'What does it mean?' replied Owen contemptuously. 'It means that if +the Editor of the Obscurer put that in his paper as an argument against +Socialism, either he is of feeble intellect himself or else he thinks +that the majority of his readers are. That isn't an argument against +Socialism--it's an argument against the hypocrites who pretend to be +Christians--the people who profess to "Love their neighbours as +themselves"--who pretend to believe in Universal Brotherhood, and that +they do not love the world or the things of the world and say that they +are merely "Pilgrims on their way to a better land". As for why I +don't do it--why should I? I don't pretend to be a Christian. But +you're all "Christians"--why don't you do it?' + +'We're not talkin' about religion,' exclaimed Crass, impatiently. + +'Then what are you talking about? I never said anything about "Sharing +Out" or "Bearing one another's burdens". I don't profess to "Give to +everyone who asks of me" or to "Give my cloak to the man who take away +my coat". I have read that Christ taught that His followers must do +all these things, but as I do not pretend to be one of His followers I +don't do them. But you believe in Christianity: why don't you do the +things that He said?' + +As nobody seemed to know the answer to this question, the lecturer +proceeded: + +'In this matter the difference between so-called "Christians" and +Socialists is this: Christ taught the Fatherhood of God and the +Brotherhood of Men. Those who today pretend to be Christ's followers +hypocritically profess to carry out those teachings now. But they +don't. They have arranged "The Battle of Life" system instead! + +'The Socialist--very much against his will--finds himself in the midst +of this horrible battle, and he appeals to the other combatants to +cease from fighting and to establish a system of Brotherly Love and +Mutual Helpfulness, but he does not hypocritically pretend to practise +brotherly love towards those who will not agree to his appeal, and who +compel him to fight with them for his very life. He knows that in this +battle he must either fight or go under. Therefore, in self-defiance, +he fights; but all the time he continues his appeal for the cessation +of the slaughter. He pleads for the changing of the system. He advocates +Co-operation instead of Competition: but how can he co-operate with +people who insist on competing with him? No individual can practise +co-operation by himself! Socialism can only be practised by the +Community--that is the meaning of the word. At present, the other +members of the community--the "Christians"--deride and oppose the +Socialist's appeal. + +'It is these pretended Christians who do not practise what they preach, +because, all the time they are singing their songs of Brotherhood and +Love, they are fighting with each other, and strangling each other and +trampling each other underfoot in their horrible "Battle of Life"! + +'No Socialist suggests "Sharing out" money or anything else in the +manner you say. And another thing: if you only had a little more sense +you might be able to perceive that this stock "argument" of yours is +really an argument against the present system, inasmuch as it proves +that Money is in itself of no use whatever. Supposing all the money +was shared out equally; and suppose there was enough of it for everyone +to have ten thousand pounds; and suppose they then all thought they +were rich and none of them would work. What would they live on? Their +money? Could they eat it or drink it or wear it? It wouldn't take +them very long to find out that this wonderful money--which under the +present system is the most powerful thing in existence--is really of no +more use than so much dirt. They would speedily perish, not from lack +of money, but from lack of wealth--that is, from lack of things that +are made by work. And further, it is quite true that if all the money +were distributed equally amongst all the people tomorrow, it would all +be up in heaps again in a very short time. But that only proves that +while the present Money System remains, it will be impossible to do +away with poverty, for heaps in some places mean little or nothing in +other places. Therefore while the money system lasts we are bound to +have poverty and all the evils it brings in its train.' + +'Oh, of course everybody's an idjit except you,' sneered Crass, who was +beginning to feel rather fogged. + +'I rise to a pint of order,' said Easton. + +'And I rise to order a pint,' cried Philpot. + +'Order what the bloody 'ell you like,' remarked Harlow, 'so long as I +'aven't got to pay for it.' + +'Mine's a pint of porter,' observed the man on the pail. + +'The pint is,' proceeded Easton, 'when does the lecturer intend to +explain to us what is the real cause of poverty.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' cried Harlow. 'That's what I want to know, too.' + +'And what I should like to know is, who is supposed to be givin' this +'ere lecture?' inquired the man on the pail. + +'Why, Owen, of course,' replied Harlow. + +'Well, why don't you try to keep quiet for a few minutes and let 'im +get on with it?' + +'The next b--r wot interrupts,' cried Philpot, rolling up his +shirt-sleeves and glaring threateningly round upon the meeting. 'The +next b--r wot interrupts goes out through the bloody winder!' + +At this, everybody pretended to be very frightened, and edged away as +far as possible from Philpot. Easton, who was sitting next to him, got +up and crossed over to Owen's vacant seat. The man on the pail was the +only one who did not seem nervous; perhaps he felt safer because he +was, as usual, surrounded by a moat. + +'Poverty,' resumed the lecturer, consists in a shortage of the +necessaries of life--or rather, of the benefits of civilization.' + +'You've said that about a 'undred times before,' snarled Crass. + +'I know I have; and I have no doubt I shall have to say it about five +hundred times more before you understand what it means.' + +'Get on with the bloody lecture,' shouted the man on the pail. 'Never +mind arguin' the point.' + +'Well, keep horder, can't you?' cried Philpot, fiercely, 'and give the +man a chance.' + +'All these things are produced in the same way,' proceeded Owen. 'They +are made from the Raw materials by those who work--aided by machinery. +When we inquire into the cause of the present shortage of these things, +the first question we should ask is--Are there not sufficient of the +raw materials in existence to enable us to produce enough to satisfy +the needs of all? + +'The answer to this question is--There are undoubtedly more than +sufficient of all the raw materials. + +'Insufficiency of raw material is therefore not the cause. We must +look in another direction. + +'The next question is--Are we short of labour? Is there not a +sufficient number of people able and willing to work? Or is there not +enough machinery? + +'The answers to these questions are--There are plenty of people able +and willing to work, and there is plenty of machinery! + +'These things being so, how comes this extraordinary result? How is it +that the benefits of civilization are not produced in sufficient +quantity to satisfy the needs of all? How is it that the majority of +the people always have to go without most of the refinements, comforts, +and pleasures of life, and very often without even the bare necessaries +of existence? + +'Plenty of materials--Plenty of Labour--Plenty of Machinery--and, +nearly everybody going short of nearly everything! + +'The cause of this extraordinary state of affairs is that although we +possess the means of producing more than abundance for all, we also +have an imbecile system of managing our affairs. + +'The present Money System prevents us from doing the necessary work, +and consequently causes the majority of the population to go short of +the things that can be made by work. They suffer want in the midst of +the means of producing abundance. They remain idle because they are +bound and fettered with a chain of gold. + +'Let us examine the details of this insane, idiotic, imbecile system.' + +Owen now asked Philpot to pass him a piece of charred wood from under +the grate, and having obtained what he wanted, he drew upon the wall a +quadrangular figure about four feet in length and one foot deep. The +walls of the kitchen had not yet been cleaned off, so it did not matter +about disfiguring them. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------+ + | | + | | + | | + | | + | | + | This represents the whole of the adult population of the country | + | | + | | + | | + | | + | | + +------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +'To find out the cause of the shortage in this country of the things +that can be made by work it is first of all necessary to find out how +people spend their time. Now this square represents the whole of the +adult population of this country. There are many different classes of +people, engaged in a great number of different occupations. Some of +them are helping to produce the benefits of civilization, and some are +not. All these people help to consume these things, but when we +inquire into their occupations we shall find that although the majority +are workers, only a comparatively small number are engaged in actually +producing either the benefits of civilization or the necessaries of +life.'... + +Order being once more restored, the lecturer turned again to the +drawing on the wall and stretched out his hand, evidently with the +intention of making some addition to it, but instead of doing so he +paused irresolutely, and faltering, let his arm drop down again by his +side. + +An absolute, disconcerting silence reigned. His embarrassment and +nervousness increased. He knew that they were unwilling to hear or +talk or think about such subjects as the cause of poverty at all. They +preferred to make fun of and ridicule them. He knew they would refuse +to try to see the meaning of what he wished to say if it were at all +difficult or obscure. How was he to put it to them so that they would +HAVE to understand it whether they wished to or not. It was almost +impossible. + +It would be easy enough to convince them if they would only take a +LITTLE trouble and try to understand, but he knew that they certainly +would not 'worry' themselves about such a subject as this; it was not +as if it were some really important matter, such as a smutty story, a +game of hooks and rings or shove-ha'penny, something concerning +football or cricket, horse-racing or the doings of some Royal personage +or aristocrat. + +The problem of the cause of poverty was only something that concerned +their own and their children's future welfare. Such an unimportant +matter, being undeserving of any earnest attention, must be put before +them so clearly and plainly that they would be compelled to understand +it at a glance; and it was almost impossible to do it. + +Observing his hesitation, some of the men began to snigger. ''E seems +to 'ave got 'isself into a bit of a fog,' remarked Crass in a loud +whisper to Slyme, who laughed. + +The sound roused Owen, who resumed: + +'All these people help to consume the things produced by labour. We +will now divide them into separate classes. Those who help to produce; +those who do nothing, those who do harm, and those who are engaged in +unnecessary work.' + +'And,' sneered Crass, 'those who are engaged in unnecessary talk.' + +'First we will separate those who not only do nothing, but do not even +pretend to be of any use; people who would consider themselves +disgraced if they by any chance did any useful work. This class +includes tramps, beggars, the "Aristocracy", "Society" people, great +landowners, and generally all those possessed of hereditary wealth.' + +As he spoke he drew a vertical line across one end of the oblong. + + + +------------+-----------------------------------------------------+ + | Tramps | | + | Beggars | | + | Society | | + | People | | + | Aristoc- | | + | racy | | + | Great | | + | Landowners | | + | All those | | + | possessed | | + | of | | + | hereditary | | + | wealth | | + +------------+-----------------------------------------------------+ + +'These people do absolutely nothing except devour or enjoy the things +produced by the labours of others. + +'Our next division represents those who do work of a kind--"mental" +work if you like to call it so--work that benefits themselves and harms +other people. Employers--or rather Exploiters of Labour; Thieves, +Swindlers, Pickpockets; profit seeking share-holders; burglars; +Bishops; Financiers; Capitalists, and those persons humorously called +"Ministers" of religion. If you remember that the word "minister" +means "servant" you will be able to see the joke. + + 1 2 + +------------+-------------+---------------------------------------+ + | Tramps | Exploiters | | + | Beggars | of Labour | | + | Society | Thieves | | + | People | Swindlers | | + | Aristoc- | Pickpockets | | + | racy | Burglars | | + | Great | Bishops | | + | Landowners | Financiers | | + | All those | Capitalists | | + | possessed | Share- | | + | of | holders | | + | hereditary | Ministers | | + | wealth | of religion | | + +------------+-------------+---------------------------------------+ + +'None of these people produce anything themselves, but by means of +cunning and scheming they contrive between them to obtain possession of +a very large portion of the things produced by the labour of others. + +'Number three stands for those who work for wages or salaries, doing +unnecessary work. That is, producing things or doing things +which--though useful and necessary to the Imbecile System--cannot be +described as the necessaries of life or the benefits of civilization. +This is the largest section of all. It comprises Commercial +Travellers, Canvassers, Insurance agents, commission agents, the great +number of Shop Assistants, the majority of clerks, workmen employed in +the construction and adornment of business premises, people occupied +with what they call "Business", which means being very busy without +producing anything. Then there is a vast army of people engaged in +designing, composing, painting or printing advertisements, things which +are for the most part of no utility whatever, the object of most +advertisements is merely to persuade people to buy from one firm rather +than from another. If you want some butter it doesn't matter whether +you buy it from Brown or Jones or Robinson.' + + 1 2 3 + +------------+-------------+-------------+-------------------------+ + | Tramps | Exploiters | All those | | + | Beggars | of Labour | engaged in | | + | Society | Thieves | unnecessary | | + | People | Swindlers | work | | + | Aristoc- | Pickpockets | | | + | racy | Burglars | | | + | Great | Bishops | | | + | Landowners | Financiers | | | + | All those | Capitalists | | | + | possessed | Share- | | | + | of | holders | | | + | hereditary | Ministers | | | + | wealth | of religion | | | + +------------+-------------+-------------+-------------------------+ + +During the delivery of this pert of the lecture, the audience began to +manifest symptoms of impatience and dissent. Perceiving this, Owen, +speaking very rapidly, continued: + +'If you go down town, you will see half a dozen drapers' shops within a +stone's-throw of each other--often even next door to each other--all +selling the same things. You can't possibly think that all those shops +are really necessary? You know that one of them would serve the +purpose for which they are all intended--to store and serve as a centre +for the distribution of the things that are made by work. If you will +admit that five out of the six shops are not really necessary, you must +also admit that the men who built them, and the salesmen and women or +other assistants engaged in them, and the men who design and write and +print their advertisements are all doing unnecessary work; all really +wasting their time and labour, time and labour that might be employed +in helping to produce these things that we are at present short of. +You must admit that none of these people are engaged in producing +either the necessaries of life or the benefits of civilization. They +buy them, and sell them, and handle them, and haggle over, them, and +display them, in the plate glass windows of "Stores" and "Emporiums" +and make profit out of them, and use them, but these people themselves +produce nothing that is necessary to life or happiness, and the things +that some of them do produce are only necessary to the present imbecile +system.' + +'What the 'ell sort of a bloody system do you think we ought to 'ave, +then?' interrupted the man on the pail. + +'Yes: you're very good at finding fault,' sneered Slyme, 'but why don't +you tell us 'ow it's all going to be put right?' + +'Well, that's not what we're talking about now, is it?' replied Owen. +'At present we're only trying to find out how it is that there is not +sufficient produced for everyone to have enough of the things that are +made by work. Although most of the people in number three work very +hard, they produce Nothing.' + +'This is a lot of bloody rot!' exclaimed Crass, impatiently. + +'Even if there is more shops than what's actually necessary,' cried +Harlow, 'it all helps people to get a livin'! If half of 'em was shut +up, it would just mean that all them what works there would be out of a +job. Live and let live, I say: all these things makes work.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' shouted the man behind the moat. + +'Yes, I know it makes "work",' replied Owen, 'but we can't live on mere +"work", you know. To live in comfort we need a sufficiency of the +things that can be made by work. A man might work very hard and yet be +wasting his time if he were not producing something necessary or useful. + +'Why are there so many shops and stores and emporiums? Do you imagine +they exist for the purpose of giving those who build them, or work in +them, a chance to earn a living? Nothing of the sort. They are carried +on, and exorbitant prices are charged for the articles they sell, to +enable the proprietors to amass fortunes, and to pay extortionate rents +to the landlords. That is why the wages and salaries of nearly all +those who do the work created by these businesses are cut down to the +lowest possible point.' + +'We knows all about that,' said Crass, 'but you can't get away from it +that all these things makes Work; and that's what we wants--Plenty of +Work.' + +Cries of ''Ear, 'ear,' and expressions of dissent from the views +expressed by the lecturer resounded through the room, nearly everyone +speaking at the same time. After a while, when the row had in some +measure subsided, Owen resumed: + +'Nature has not provided ready-made all the things necessary for the +life and happiness of mankind. In order to obtain these things we have +to Work. The only rational labour is that which is directed to the +creation of those things. Any kind of work which does not help us to +attain this object is a ridiculous, idiotic, criminal, imbecile, waste +of time. + +'That is what the great army of people represented by division number +three are doing at present: they are all very busy--working very +hard--but to all useful intents and purposes they are doing Nothing.' + +'Well, all right,' said Harlow. ''Ave it yer own way, but there's no +need to keep on repeating the same thing over an' over again.' + +'The next division,' resumed Owen, 'stands for those who are engaged in +really useful work--the production of the benefits of civilization--the +necessaries, refinements and comforts of life.' + + 1 2 3 4 + +------------+-------------+-------------+------------+------------+ + | Tramps | Exploiters | All those | All those | | + | Beggars | of Labour | engaged in | engaged in | | + | Society | Thieves | unnecessary | necessary | U | + | People | Swindlers | work | work--the | N | + | Aristoc- | Pickpockets | | production | E | + | racy | Burglars | | of the | M | + | Great | Bishops | | benefits | P | + | Landowners | Financiers | | of | L | + | All those | Capitalists | | civiliz- | O | + | possessed | Share- | | ation | Y | + | of | holders | | | E | + | hereditary | Ministers | | | D | + | wealth | of religion | | | | + +------------+-------------+-------------+------------+------------+ + +'Hooray!' shouted Philpot, leading off a cheer which was taken up +enthusiastically by the crowd, 'Hooray! This is where WE comes in,' he +added, nodding his head and winking his goggle eyes at the meeting. + +'I wish to call the chairman to horder,' said the man on the pail. + +When Owen had finished writing in the list of occupations several +members of the audience rose to point out that those engaged in the +production of beer had been omitted. Owen rectified this serious +oversight and proceeded: + +'As most of the people in number four are out of work at least one +quarter of their time, we must reduce the size of this division by one +fourth--so. The grey part represents the unemployed.' + +'But some of those in number three are often unemployed as well,' said +Harlow. + +Yes: but as THEY produce nothing even when they are at work we need not +trouble to classify them unemployed, because our present purpose is +only to discover the reason why there is not enough produced for +everyone to enjoy abundance; and this--the Present System of conducting +our affairs--is the reason of the shortage--the cause of poverty. When +you reflect that all the other people are devouring the things produced +by those in number four--can you wonder that there is not plenty for +all?' + +'"Devouring" is a good word,' said Philpot, and the others laughed. + +The lecturer now drew a small square upon the wall below the other +drawing. This square he filled in solid black. + + 1 2 3 4 + +------------+-------------+-------------+------------+------------+ + | Tramps | Exploiters | All those | All those | | + | Beggars | of Labour | engaged in | engaged in | | + | Society | Thieves | unnecessary | necessary | U | + | People | Swindlers | work | work--the | N | + | Aristoc- | Pickpockets | | production | E | + | racy | Burglars | | of the | M | + | Great | Bishops | | benefits | P | + | Landowners | Financiers | | of | L | + | All those | Capitalists | | civiliz- | O | + | possessed | Share- | | ation | Y | + | of | holders | | | E | + | hereditary | Ministers | | | D | + | wealth | of religion | | | | + +------------+-------------+-------------+------------+------------+ + + ############## + ############## + ############## + This represents the total ############## + of the things produced by ############## + the people in division 4. ############## + +'This represents the total amount of the benefits of civilization and +necessaries of life produced by the people in number four. We now +proceed to "Share Out" the things in the same way as they are actually +divided amongst the different classes of the population under the +present imbecile system. + +'As the people in divisions one and two are universally considered to +be the most worthy and deserving we give them--two-thirds of the whole. + +'The remainder we give to be "Shared Out" amongst the people +represented by divisions three and four. + + 1 2 3 4 + +------------+-------------+-------------+------------+------------+ + | Tramps | Exploiters | All those | All those | | + | Beggars | of Labour | engaged in | engaged in | | + | Society | Thieves | unnecessary | necessary | U | + | People | Swindlers | work | work--the | N | + | Aristoc- | Pickpockets | | production | E | + | racy | Burglars | | of the | M | + | Great | Bishops | | benefits | P | + | Landowners | Financiers | | of | L | + | All those | Capitalists | | civiliz- | O | + | possessed | Share- | | ation | Y | + | of | holders | | | E | + | hereditary | Ministers | | | D | + | wealth | of religion | | | | + +------------+-------------+-------------+------------+------------+ + \___________ ____________/ \___________ ___________/ + \/ \/ + ######### ##### + ######### ##### + ######### ##### + ######### ##### + ######### ##### + ######### ##### + How the things produced by the people in division 4 are 'shared + out' amongst the different classes of the population. + +'Now you mustn't run away with the idea that the people in three and +four take their share quietly and divide the things equally between +them. Not at all. Some get very little, some none, some more than a +fair share. It is in these two divisions that the ferocious "Battle of +Life" rages most fiercely; and of course in this battle the weak and +the virtuous fare the worst. Even those whose exceptional abilities or +opportunities enable them to succeed, are compelled to practise +selfishness, because a man of exceptional ability who was not selfish +would devote his abilities to relieving the manifest sufferings of +others, and not to his own profit, and if he did the former he would +not be successful in the sense that the world understands the word. +All those who really seek to "Love their neighbour as themselves", or +to return good for evil, the gentle, the kind, and all those who +refrain from doing to others the things they would not like to suffer +themselves; all these are of necessity found amongst the vanquished; +because only the worst--only those who are aggressive, cunning, selfish +and mean are fitted to survive. And all these people in numbers three +and four are so fully occupied in this dreadful struggle to secure a +little, that but few of them pause to inquire why there are not more of +the things they are fighting for, or why it is necessary to fight like +this at all!' + +For a few minutes silence prevailed, each man's mind being busy trying +to think of some objection to the lecturer's arguments. + +'How could the small number of people in number one and two consume as +much as you've given 'em in your drorin'?' demanded Crass. + +'They don't actually consume all of it,' replied Owen. 'Much of it is +wantonly wasted. They also make fortunes by selling some of it in +foreign countries; but they consume a great part of it themselves, +because the amount of labour expended on the things enjoyed by these +people is greater than that expended in the production of the things +used by the workers. Most of the people who do nothing get the best of +everything. More than three-quarters of the time of the working +classes is spent in producing the things used by the wealthy. Compare +the quality and quantity of the clothing possessed by the wife or +daughter of a rich man with that of the wife or daughter of a worker. +The time and labour spent on producing the one is twenty times greater +in one case than in the other; and it's the same with everything else. +Their homes, their clothing, boots, hats, jewellery, and their food. +Everything must be of the very best that art or long and painful labour +can produce. But for most of those whose labour produces all these +good things--anything is considered good enough. For themselves, the +philanthropic workers manufacture shoddy cloth--that is, cheap cloth +made of old rags and dirt; and shoddy, uncomfortable ironclad boots. +If you see a workman wearing a really good suit of clothes you may +safely conclude that he is either leading an unnatural life--that is, +he is not married--or that he has obtained it from a tallyman on the +hire system and has not yet paid for it--or that it is someone else's +cast-off suit that he has bought second-hand or had given to him by +some charitable person. It's the same with the food. All the ducks and +geese, pheasants, partridges, and all the very best parts of the very +best meat--all the soles and the finest plaice and salmon and trout--' + +''Ere chuck it,' cried Harlow, fiercely. 'We don't want to 'ear no +more of it,' and several others protested against the lecturer wasting +time on such mere details. + +'--all the very best of everything is reserved exclusively for the +enjoyment of the people in divisions one and two, while the workers +subsist on block ornaments, margarine, adulterated tea, mysterious +beer, and are content--only grumbling when they are unable to obtain +even such fare as this.' + +Owen paused and a gloomy silence followed, but suddenly Crass +brightened up. He detected a serious flaw in the lecturer's argument. + +'You say the people in one and two gets all the best of everything, but +what about the tramps and beggars? You've got them in division one.' + +'Yes, I know. You see, that's the proper place for them. They belong +to a Loafer class. They are no better mentally or morally than any of +the other loafers in that division; neither are they of any more use. +Of course, when we consider them in relation to the amount they consume +of the things produced by others, they are not so harmful as the other +loafers, because they consume comparatively little. But all the same +they are in their right place in that division. All those people don't +get the same share. The section represents not individuals--but the +loafer class.' + +'But I thought you said you was goin' to prove that money was the cause +of poverty,' said Easton. + +'So it is,' said Owen. 'Can't you see that it's money that's caused +all these people to lose sight of the true purpose of labour--the +production of the things we need? All these people are suffering from +the delusion that it doesn't matter what kind of work they do--or +whether they merely do nothing--so long as they get MONEY for doing it. +Under the present extraordinary system, that's the only object they +have in view--to get money. Their ideas are so topsy-turvey that they +regard with contempt those who are engaged in useful work! With the +exception of criminals and the poorer sort of loafers, the working +classes are considered to be the lowest and least worthy in the +community. Those who manage to get money for doing something other +than productive work are considered more worthy of respect on that +account. Those who do nothing themselves, but get money out of the +labour of others, are regarded as being more worthy still! But the +ones who are esteemed most of all and honoured above all the rest, are +those who obtain money for doing absolutely nothing!' + +'But I can't see as that proves that money is the cause of poverty,' +said Easton. + +'Look here,' said Owen. 'The people in number four produce everything, +don't they?' + +'Yes; we knows all about that,' interrupted Harlow. 'But they gets +paid for it, don't they? They gets their wages.' + +'Yes, and what does their wages consist of?' said Owen. + +'Why, money, of course,' replied Harlow, impatiently. + +And what do they do with their money when they get it? Do they eat it, +or drink it, or wear it?' + +At this apparently absurd question several of those who had hitherto +been attentive listeners laughed derisively; it was really very +difficult to listen patiently to such nonsense. + +'Of course they don't,' answered Harlow scornfully. 'They buy the +things they want with it.' + +'Do you think that most of them manage to save a part of their +wages--put it away in the bank.' + +'Well, I can speak for meself,' replied Harlow amid laughter. 'It +takes me all my bloody time to pay my rent and other expenses and to +keep my little lot in shoe leather, and it's dam little I spend on +beer; p'r'aps a tanner or a bob a week at the most.' + +'A single man can save money if he likes,' said Slyme. + +'I'm not speaking of single men,' replied Owen. 'I'm referring to +those who live natural lives.' + +'What about all the money what's in the Post Office Savings Bank, and +Building and Friendly Societies?' said Crass. + +'A very large part of that belongs to people who are in business, or +who have some other source of income than their own wages. There are +some exceptionally fortunate workers who happen to have good situations +and higher wages than the ordinary run of workmen. Then there are some +who are so placed--by letting lodgings, for instance--that they are +able to live rent free. Others whose wives go out to work; and others +again who have exceptional jobs and work a lot of overtime--but these +are all exceptional cases.' + +'I say as no married workin' man can save any money at all!' shouted +Harlow, 'not unless 'e goes without some of even the few things we are +able to get--and makes 'is wife and kids go without as well.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' said everybody except Crass and Slyme, who were both +thrifty working men, and each of them had some money saved in one or +other of the institutions mentioned. + +'Then that means,' said Owen, 'that means that the wages the people in +division four receive is not equivalent to the work they do.' + +'Wotcher mean, equivalent?' cried Crass. 'Why the 'ell don't yer talk +plain English without draggin' in a lot of long words wot nobody can't +understand?' + +'I mean this,' replied Owen, speaking very slowly. 'Everything is +produced by the people in number four. In return for their work they +are given--Money, and the things they have made become the property of +the people who do nothing. Then, as the money is of no use, the +workers go to shops and give it away in exchange for some of the things +they themselves have made. They spend--or give back--ALL their wages; +but as the money they got as wages is not equal in value to the things +they produced, they find that they are only able to buy back a VERY +SMALL PART. So you see that these little discs of metal--this +Money--is a device for enabling those who do not work to rob the +workers of the greater part of the fruits of their toil.' + +The silence that ensued was broken by Crass. + +'It sounds very pretty,' he sneered, 'but I can't make no 'ead or tail +of it, meself.' + +'Look here!' cried Owen. 'The producing class--these people in number +four are supposed to be paid for their work. Their wages are supposed +to be equal in value to their work. But it's not so. If it were, by +spending all their wages, the producing class would be able to buy back +All they had produced.' + +Owen ceased speaking and silence once more ensued. No one gave any +sign of understanding, or of agreeing or of disagreeing with what he +had said. Their attitude was strictly neutral. Barrington's pipe had +gone out during the argument. He relit it from the fire with a piece +of twisted paper. + +'If their wages were really equal in value to the product of their +labour,' Owen repeated, 'they would be able to buy back not a small +part--but the Whole.'... + +At this, a remark from Bundy caused a shout of laughter, and when +Wantley added point to the joke by making a sound like the discharge of +a pistol the merriment increased tenfold. + +'Well, that's done it,' remarked Easton, as he got up and opened the +window. + +'It's about time you was buried, if the smell's anything to go by,' +said Harlow, addressing Wantley, who laughed and appeared to think he +had distinguished himself. + +'But even if we include the whole of the working classes,' continued +Owen, 'that is, the people in number three as well as those in number +four, we find that their combined wages are insufficient to buy the +things made by the producers. The total value of the wealth produced +in this country during the last year was L1,800,000,000, and the total +amount paid in wages during the same period was only L600,000,000. In +other words, by means of the Money Trick, the workers were robbed of +two-thirds of the value of their labour. All the people in numbers +three and four are working and suffering and starving and fighting in +order that the rich people in numbers one and two may live in luxury, +and do nothing. These are the wretches who cause poverty: they not +only devour or waste or hoard the things made by the worker, but as +soon as their own wants are supplied--they compel the workers to cease +working and prevent them producing the things they need. Most of these +people!' cried Owen, his usually pale face flushing red and his eyes +shining with sudden anger, 'most of these people do not deserve to be +called human beings at all! They're devils! They know that whilst +they are indulging in pleasures of every kind--all around them men and +women and little children are existing in want or dying of hunger.' + +The silence which followed was at length broken by Harlow: + +'You say the workers is entitled to all they produce, but you forget +there's the raw materials to pay for. They don't make them, you know.' + +'Of course the workers don't create the raw materials,' replied Owen. +'But I am not aware that the capitalists or the landlords do so either. +The raw materials exist in abundance in and on the earth, but they are +of no use until labour has been applied to them.' + +'But then, you see, the earth belongs to the landlords!' cried Crass, +unguardedly. + +'I know that; and of course you think it's right that the whole country +should belong to a few people--' + +'I must call the lecturer to horder,' interrupted Philpot. 'The land +question is not before the meeting at present.' + +'You talk about the producers being robbed of most of the value of what +they produce,' said Harlow, 'but you must remember that it ain't all +produced by hand labour. What about the things what's made by +machinery?' + +'The machines themselves were made by the workers,' returned Owen, 'but +of course they do not belong to the workers, who have been robbed of +them by means of the Money Trick.' + +'But who invented all the machinery?' cried Crass. + +'That's more than you or I or anyone else can say,' returned Owen, 'but +it certainly wasn't the wealthy loafer class, or the landlords, or the +employers. Most of the men who invented the machinery lived and died +unknown, in poverty and often in actual want. The inventors too were +robbed by the exploiter-of-labour class. There are no men living at +present who can justly claim to have invented the machinery that exists +today. The most they can truthfully say is that they have added to or +improved upon the ideas of those who lived and worked before them. +Even Watt and Stevenson merely improved upon steam engines and +locomotives already existing. Your question has really nothing to do +with the subject we are discussing: we are only trying to find out why +the majority of people have to go short of the benefits of +civilization. One of the causes is--the majority of the population are +engaged in work that does not produce those things; and most of what IS +produced is appropriated and wasted by those who have no right to it. + +'The workers produce Everything! If you walk through the streets of a +town or a city, and look around, Everything that you can +see--Factories, Machinery, Houses, Railways, Tramways, Canals, +Furniture, Clothing, Food and the very road or pavement you stand upon +were all made by the working class, who spend all their wages in buying +back only a very small part of the things they produce. Therefore what +remains in the possession of their masters represents the difference +between the value of the work done and the wages paid for doing it. +This systematic robbery has been going on for generations, the value of +the accumulated loot is enormous, and all of it, all the wealth at +present in the possession of the rich, is rightly the property of the +working class--it has been stolen from them by means of the Money +Trick.'... + +For some moments an oppressive silence prevailed. The men stared with +puzzled, uncomfortable looks alternately at each other and at the +drawings on the wall. They were compelled to do a little thinking on +their own account, and it was a process to which they were +unaccustomed. In their infancy they had been taught to distrust their +own intelligence and to leave 'thinking' to their 'pastors' and masters +and to their 'betters' generally. All their lives they had been true +to this teaching, they had always had blind, unreasoning faith in the +wisdom and humanity of their pastors and masters. That was the reason +why they and their children had been all their lives on the verge of +starvation and nakedness, whilst their 'betters'--who did nothing but +the thinking--went clothed in purple and fine linen and fared +sumptuously every day. + +Several men had risen from their seats and were attentively studying +the diagrams Owen had drawn on the wall; and nearly all the others were +making the same mental efforts--they were trying to think of something +to say in defence of those who robbed them of the fruits of their toil. + +'I don't see no bloody sense in always runnin' down the rich,' said +Harlow at last. 'There's always been rich and poor in the world and +there always will be.' + +'Of course,' said Slyme. 'It says in the Bible that the poor shall +always be with us.' + +'What the bloody 'ell kind of system do you think we ought to 'ave?' +demanded Crass. 'If everything's wrong, 'ow's it goin' to be altered?' + +At this, everybody brightened up again, and exchanged looks of +satisfaction and relief. Of course! It wasn't necessary to think +about these things at all! Nothing could ever be altered: it had +always been more or less the same, and it always would be. + +'It seems to me that you all HOPE it is impossible to alter it,' said +Owen. 'Without trying to find out whether it could be done, you +persuade yourselves that it is impossible, and then, instead of being +sorry, you're glad!' + +Some of them laughed in a silly, half-ashamed way. + +'How do YOU reckon it could be altered?' said Harlow. + +'The way to alter it is, first to enlighten the people as to the real +cause of their sufferings, and then--' + +'Well,' interrupted Crass, with a self-satisfied chuckle, 'it'll take a +better bloody man than you to enlighten ME!' + +'I don't want to be henlightened into Darkness!' said Slyme piously. + +'But what sort of System do you propose, then?' repeated Harlow. + +'After you've got 'em all enlightened--if you don't believe in sharing +out all the money equal, how ARE you goin' to alter it?' + +'I don't know 'ow 'e's goin' to alter it,' sneered Crass, looking at +his watch and standing up, 'but I do know what the time is--two minits +past one!' + +'The next lecture,' said Philpot, addressing the meeting as they all +prepared to return to work, 'the next lecture will be postponded till +tomorrer at the usual time, when it will be my painful dooty to call +upon Mr Owen to give 'is well-known and most hobnoxious address +entitled "Work and how to avoid it." Hall them as wants to be +henlightened kindly attend.' + +'Or hall them as don't get the sack tonight,' remarked Easton grimly. + + + +Chapter 26 + +The Slaughter + + +During the afternoon, Rushton and Sweater visited the house, the latter +having an appointment to meet there a gardener to whom he wished to +give instructions concerning the laying out of the grounds, which had +been torn up for the purpose of putting in the new drains. Sweater had +already arranged with the head gardener of the public park to steal +some of the best plants from that place and have them sent up to 'The +Cave'. These plants had been arriving in small lots for about a week. +They must have been brought there either in the evening after the men +left off or very early in the morning before they came. The two +gentlemen remained at the house for about half an hour and as they went +away the mournful sound of the Town Hall bell--which was always tolled +to summon meetings of the Council--was heard in the distance, and the +hands remarked to each other that another robbery was about to be +perpetrated. + +Hunter did not come to the job again that day: he had been sent by +Rushton to price some work for which the firm was going to tender an +estimate. There was only one person who felt any regret at his +absence, and that was Mrs White--Bert's mother, who had been working at +'The Cave' for several days, scrubbing the floors. As a rule, Hunter +paid her wages every night, and on this occasion she happened to need +the money even more than usual. As leaving off time drew near, she +mentioned the matter to Crass, who advised her to call at the office on +her way home and ask the young lady clerk for the money. As Hunter did +not appear, she followed the foreman's advice. + +When she reached the shop Rushton was just coming out. She explained +to him what she wanted and he instructed Mr Budd to tell Miss Wade to +pay her. The shopman accordingly escorted her to the office at the +back of the shop, and the young lady book-keeper--after referring to +former entries to make quite certain of the amount, paid her the sum +that Hunter had represented as her wages, the same amount that Miss +Wade had on the previous occasions given him to pay the charwoman. When +Mrs White got outside she found that she held in her hand half a crown +instead of the two shillings she usually received from Mr Hunter. At +first she felt inclined to take it back, but after some hesitation she +thought it better to wait until she saw Hunter, when she could tell him +about it; but the next morning when she saw the disciple at 'The Cave' +he broached the subject first, and told her that Miss Wade had made a +mistake. And that evening when he paid her, he deducted the sixpence +from the usual two shillings. + +The lecture announced by Philpot was not delivered. Anxiously awaiting +the impending slaughter the men kept tearing into it as usual, for they +generally keep working in the usual way, each one trying to outdo the +others so as not to lose his chance of being one of the lucky one... + +Misery now went round and informed all the men with the exception of +Crass, Owen, Slyme and Sawkins--that they would have to stand off that +night. He told them that the firm had several jobs in view--work they +had tendered for and hoped to get, and said they could look round after +Christmas and he might--possibly--be able to start some of them again. +They would be paid at the office tomorrow--Saturday--at one o'clock as +usual, but if any of them wished they could have their money tonight. +The men thanked him, and most of them said they would come for their +wages at the usual pay-time, and would call round as he suggested, +after the holidays, to see if there was anything to do. + +In all, fifteen men--including Philpot, Harlow, Easton and Ned Dawson, +were to 'stand off' that night. They took their dismissal stolidly, +without any remark, some of them even with an affectation of +indifference, but there were few attempts at conversation afterwards. +The little work that remained to be done they did in silence, every man +oppressed by the same terror--the dread of the impending want, the +privation and unhappiness that they knew they and their families would +have to suffer during the next few months. + +Bundy and his mate Dawson were working in the kitchen fixing the new +range in place of the old one which they had taken out. They had been +engaged on this job all day, and their hands and faces and clothes were +covered with soot, which they had also contrived to smear and dab all +over the surfaces of the doors and other woodwork in the room, much to +the indignation of Crass and Slyme, who had to wash it all off before +they could put on the final coat of paint. + +'You can't help makin' a little mess on a job of this kind, you know,' +remarked Bundy, as he was giving the finishing touches to the work, +making good the broken parts of the wall with cement, whilst his mate +was clearing away the debris. + +'Yes; but there's no need to claw 'old of the bloody doors every time +you goes in and out,' snarled Crass, 'and you could 'ave put yer tools +on the floor instead of makin' a bench of the dresser.' + +'You can 'ave the bloody place all to yerself in about five minutes,' +replied Bundy, as he assisted to lift a sack of cement weighing about +two hundredweight on to Dawson's back. 'We're finished now.' + +When they had cleared away all the dirt and fragments of bricks and +mortar, while Crass and Slyme proceeded with the painting, Bundy and +Dawson loaded up their hand-cart with the old range and the bags of +unused cement and plaster, which they took back to the yard. Meantime, +Misery was wandering about the house and gounds like an evil spirit +seeking rest and finding none. He stood for some time gloomily +watching the four gardeners, who were busily at work laying strips of +turf, mowing the lawn, rolling the gravel paths and trimming the trees +and bushes. The boy Bert, Philpot, Harlow, Easton and Sawkins were +loading a hand-cart with ladders and empty paint-pots to return to the +yard. Just as they were setting out, Misery stopped them, remarking +that the cart was not half loaded--he said it would take a month to get +all the stuff away if they went on like that; so by his directions they +placed another long ladder on top of the pile and once more started on +their way, but before they had gone two dozen yards one of the wheels +of the cart collapsed and the load was scattered over the roadway. +Bert was at the same side of the cart as the wheel that broke and he +was thrown violently to the ground, where he lay half stunned, in the +midst of the ladders and planks. When they got him out they were +astonished to find that, thanks to the special Providence that watches +over all small boys, he was almost unhurt--just a little dazed, that +was all; and by the time Sawkins returned with another cart, Bert was +able to help to gather up the fallen paint-pots and to accompany the +men with the load to the yard. At the corner of the road they paused +to take a last look at the 'job'. + +'There it stands!' said Harlow, tragically, extending his arm towards +the house. 'There it stands! A job that if they'd only have let us do +it properly, couldn't 'ave been done with the number of 'ands we've +'ad, in less than four months; and there it is, finished, messed up, +slobbered over and scamped, in nine weeks!' + +'Yes, and now we can all go to 'ell,' said Philpot, gloomily. + +At the yard they found Bundy and his mate, Ned Dawson, who helped them +to hang up the ladders in their usual places. Philpot was glad to get +out of assisting to do this, for he had contracted a rather severe +attack of rheumatism when working outside at the 'Cave'. Whilst the +others were putting the ladders away he assisted Bert to carry the +paint-pots and buckets into the paint shop, and while there he filled a +small medicine bottle he had brought with him for the purpose, with +turpentine from the tank. He wanted this stuff to rub into his +shoulders and legs, and as he secreted the bottle in the inner pocket +of his coat, he muttered: 'This is where we gets some of our own back.' + +They took the key of the yard to the office and as they separated to go +home Bundy suggested that the best thing they could do would be to sew +their bloody mouths up for a few months, because there was not much +probability of their getting another job until about March. + +The next morning while Crass and Slyme were finishing inside, Owen +wrote the two gates. On the front entrance 'The Cave' and on the back +'Tradesmens Entrance', in gilded letters. In the meantime, Sawkins and +Bert made several journeys to the Yard with the hand-cart. + +Crass--working in the kitchen with Slyme--was very silent and +thoughtful. Ever since the job was started, every time Mr Sweater had +visited the house to see what progress was being made, Crass had been +grovelling to him in the hope of receiving a tip when the work was +finished. He had been very careful to act upon any suggestions that +Sweater had made from time to time and on several occasions had taken a +lot of trouble to get just the right tints of certain colours, making +up a number of different shades and combinations, and doing parts of +the skirtings or mouldings of rooms in order that Mr Sweater might see +exactly--before they went on with it--what it would look like when +finished. He made a great pretence of deferring to Sweater's opinion, +and assured him that he did not care how much trouble he took as long +as he--Sweater--was pleased. In fact, it was no trouble at all: it was +a pleasure. As the work neared completion, Crass began to speculate +upon the probable amount of the donation he would receive as the reward +of nine weeks of cringing, fawning, abject servility. He thought it +quite possible that he might get a quid: it would not be too much, +considering all the trouble he had taken. It was well worth it. At +any rate, he felt certain that he was sure to get ten bob; a gentleman +like Mr Sweater would never have the cheek to offer less. The more he +thought about it the more improbable it appeared that the amount would +be less than a quid, and he made up his mind that whatever he got he +would take good care that none of the other men knew anything about it. +HE was the one who had had all the worry of the job, and he was the +only one entitled to anything there was to be had. Besides, even if he +got a quid, by the time you divided that up amongst a dozen--or even +amongst two or three--it would not be worth having. + +At about eleven o'clock Mr Sweater arrived and began to walk over the +house, followed by Crass, who carried a pot of paint and a small brush +and made believe to be 'touching up' and finishing off parts of the +work. As Sweater went from one room to another Crass repeatedly placed +himself in the way in the hope of being spoken to, but Sweater took no +notice of him whatever. Once or twice Crass's heart began to beat +quickly as he furtively watched the great man and saw him thrust his +thumb and finger into his waistcoat pocket, but on each occasion +Sweater withdrew his hand with nothing in it. After a while, observing +that the gentleman was about to depart without having spoken, Crass +determined to break the ice himself. + +'It's a little better weather we're 'avin' now, sir.' + +'Yes,' replied Sweater. + +'I was beginnin' to be afraid as I shouldn't be hable to git +heverything finished in time for you to move in before Christmas, sir,' +Crass continued, 'but it's hall done now, sir.' + +Sweater made no reply. + +'I've kept the fire agoin' in hall the rooms has you told me, sir,' +resumed Crass after a pause. 'I think you'll find as the place is nice +and dry, sir; the honly places as is a bit damp is the kitchen and +scullery and the other rooms in the basement, sir, but of course that's +nearly halways the case, sir, when the rooms is partly hunderground, +sir. + +'But of course it don't matter so much about the basement, sir, because +it's honly the servants what 'as to use it, sir, and even down there +it'll be hall right hin the summer, sir.' + +One would scarcely think, from the contemptuous way in which he spoke +of 'servants' that Crass's own daughter was 'in service', but such was +the case. + +'Oh, yes, there's no doubt about that,' replied Sweater as he moved +towards the door; 'there's no doubt it will be dry enough in the +summer. Good morning.' + +'Good morning to YOU, sir,' said Crass, following him. 'I 'opes as +you're pleased with all the work, sir; everything satisfactory, sir.' + +'Oh, yes. I think it looks very nice; very nice indeed; I'm very +pleased with it,' said Sweater affably. 'Good morning.' + +'Good morning, sir,' replied the foreman with a sickly smile as Sweater +departed. + +When the other was gone, Crass sat down dejectedly on the bottom step +of the stairs, overwhelmed with the ruin of his hopes and expectations. +He tried to comfort himself with the reflection that all hope was not +lost, because he would have to come to the house again on Monday and +Tuesday to fix the venetian blinds; but all the same he could not help +thinking that it was only a very faint hope, for he felt that if +Sweater had intended giving anything he would have done so today; and +it was very improbable that he would see Sweater on Monday or Tuesday +at all, for the latter did not usually visit the job in the early part +of the week. However, Crass made up his mind to hope for the best, +and, pulling himself together, he presently returned to the kitchen, +where he found Slyme and Sawkins waiting for him. He had not mentioned +his hopes of a tip to either of them, but they did not need any telling +and they were both determined to have their share of whatever he got. +They eyed him keenly as he entered. + +'What did 'e give yer?' demanded Sawkins, going straight to the point. + +'Give me?' replied Crass. 'Nothing!' + +Slyme laughed in a sneering, incredulous way, but Sawkins was inclined +to be abusive. He averred that he had been watching Crass and Sweater +and had seen the latter put his thumb and finger into his waistcoat +pocket as he walked into the dining-room, followed by Crass. It took +the latter a long time to convince his two workmates of the truth of +his own account, but he succeeded at last, and they all three agreed +that Old Sweater was a sanguinary rotter, and they lamented over the +decay of the good old-fashioned customs. + +'Why, at one time o' day,' said Crass, 'only a few years ago, if you +went to a gentleman's 'ouse to paint one or two rooms you could always +be sure of a bob or two when you'd finished.' + +By half past twelve everything was squared up, and, having loaded up +the hand-cart with all that remained of the materials, dirty paint-pots +and plant, they all set out together for the yard, to put all the +things away before going to the office for their money. Sawkins took +the handle of the cart, Slyme and Crass walked at one side and Owen and +Bert at the other. There was no need to push, for the road was +downhill most of the way; so much so that they had all to help to hold +back the cart, which travelled so rapidly that Bert found it difficult +to keep pace with the others and frequently broke into a trot to +recover lost ground, and Crass--being fleshy and bloated with beer, +besides being unused to much exertion--began to perspire and soon +appealed to the others not to let it go so fast--there was no need to +get done before one o'clock. + + + +Chapter 27 + +The March of the Imperialists + + +It was an unusually fine day for the time of year, and as they passed +along the Grand Parade--which faced due south--they felt quite warm. +The Parade was crowded with richly dressed and bejewelled loafers, +whose countenances in many instances bore unmistakable signs of +drunkenness and gluttony. Some of the females had tried to conceal the +ravages of vice and dissipation by coating their faces with powder and +paint. Mingling with and part of this crowd were a number of +well-fed-looking individuals dressed in long garments of black cloth of +the finest texture, and broad-brimmed soft felt hats. Most of these +persons had gold rings on their soft white fingers and glove-like kid +or calfskin boots on their feet. They belonged to the great army of +imposters who obtain an easy living by taking advantage of the +ignorance and simplicity of their fellow-men, and pretending to be the +'followers' and 'servants' of the lowly Carpenter of Nazareth--the Man +of Sorrows, who had not where to lay His head. + +None of these black-garbed 'disciples' were associating with the groups +of unemployed carpenters, bricklayers, plasterers, and painters who +stood here and there in the carriage-way dressed in mean and shabby +clothing and with faces pale with privation. Many of these latter were +known to our friends with the cart, and nodded to them as they passed. +Now and then some of them came over and walked a little distance by +their side, inquiring whether there was any news of another job at +Rushton's. + +When they were about half-way down the Parade, just near the Fountain, +Crass and his mates encountered a number of men on whose arms were +white bands with the word 'Collector' in black letters. They carried +collecting boxes and accosted the people in the street, begging for +money for the unemployed. These men were a kind of skirmishers for the +main body, which could be seen some distance behind. + +As the procession drew near, Sawkins steered the cart into the kerb and +halted as they went past. There were about three hundred men +altogether, marching four abreast. They carried three large white +banners with black letters, 'Thanks to our Subscribers' 'In aid of +Genuine Unemployed', 'The Children must be Fed'. Although there were a +number of artisans in the procession, the majority of the men belonged +to what is called the unskilled labourer class. The skilled artisan +does not as a rule take part in such a procession except as a very last +resource... And all the time he strives to keep up an appearance of +being well-to-do, and would be highly indignant if anyone suggested +that he was really in a condition of abject, miserable poverty. +Although he knows that his children are often not so well fed as are +the pet dogs and cats of his 'betters', he tries to bluff his +neighbours into thinking that he has some mysterious private means of +which they know nothing, and conceals his poverty as if it were a +crime. Most of this class of men would rather starve than beg. +Consequently not more than a quarter of the men in the procession were +skilled artisans; the majority were labourers. + +There was also a sprinkling of those unfortunate outcasts of +society--tramps and destitute, drunken loafers. If the self-righteous +hypocrites who despise these poor wretches had been subjected to the +same conditions, the majority of them would inevitably have become the +same as these. + +Haggard and pale, shabbily or raggedly dressed, their boots broken and +down at heel, they slouched past. Some of them stared about with a +dazed or half-wild expression, but most of them walked with downcast +eyes or staring blankly straight in front of them. They appeared +utterly broken-spirited, hopeless and ashamed... + +'Anyone can see what THEY are,' sneered Crass, 'there isn't fifty +genuine tradesmen in the whole crowd, and most of 'em wouldn't work if +they 'ad the offer of it.' + +'That's just what I was thinkin',' agreed Sawkins with a laugh. + +'There will be plenty of time to say that when they have been offered +work and have refused to do it,' said Owen. + +'This sort of thing does the town a lot of 'arm,' remarked Slyme; 'it +oughtn't to be allowed; the police ought to stop it. It's enough to +drive all the gentry out of the place!' + +'Bloody disgraceful, I call it,' said Crass, 'marchin' along the Grand +Parade on a beautiful day like this, just at the very time when most of +the gentry is out enjoyin' the fresh hair.' + +'I suppose you think they ought to stay at home and starve quietly,' +said Owen. 'I don't see why these men should care what harm they do to +the town; the town doesn't seem to care much what becomes of THEM.' + +'Do you believe in this sort of thing, then?' asked Slyme. + +'No; certainly not. I don't believe in begging as a favour for what +one is entitled to demand as a right from the thieves who have robbed +them and who are now enjoying the fruits of their labour. From the +look of shame on their faces you might think that they were the +criminals instead of being the victims.' + +'Well you must admit that most of them is very inferior men,' said +Crass with a self-satisfied air. 'There's very few mechanics amongst +em.' + +'What about it if they are? What difference does that make?' replied +Owen. 'They're human beings, and they have as much right to live as +anyone else. What is called unskilled labour is just as necessary and +useful as yours or mine. I am no more capable of doing the "unskilled" +labour that most of these men do than most of them would be capable of +doing my work.' + +'Well, if they was skilled tradesmen, they might find it easier to get +a job,' said Crass. + +Owen laughed offensively. + +'Do you mean to say you think that if all these men could be +transformed into skilled carpenters, plasterers, bricklayers, and +painters, that it would be easier for all those other chaps whom we +passed a little while ago to get work? Is it possible that you or any +other sane man can believe anything so silly as that?' + +Crass did not reply. + +'If there is not enough work to employ all the mechanics whom we see +standing idle about the streets, how would it help these labourers in +the procession if they could all become skilled workmen?' + +Still Crass did not answer, and neither Slyme nor Sawkins came to his +assistance. + +'If that could be done,' continued Owen, 'it would simply make things +worse for those who are already skilled mechanics. A greater number of +skilled workers--keener competition for skilled workmen's jobs--a +larger number of mechanics out of employment, and consequently, +improved opportunities for employers to reduce wages. That is probably +the reason why the Liberal Party--which consists for the most part of +exploiters of labour--procured the great Jim Scalds to tell us that +improved technical education is the remedy for unemployment and +poverty.' + +'I suppose you think Jim Scalds is a bloody fool, the same as everybody +else what don't see things YOUR way?' said Sawkins. + +'I should think he was a fool if I thought he believed what he says. +But I don't think he believes it. He says it because he thinks the +majority of the working classes are such fools that they will believe +him. If he didn't think that most of us are fools he wouldn't tell us +such a yarn as that.' + +'And I suppose you think as 'is opinion ain't far wrong,' snarled Crass. + +'We shall be better able to judge of that after the next General +Election,' replied Owen. 'If the working classes again elect a +majority of Liberal or Tory landlords and employers to rule over them, +it will prove that Jim Scalds' estimate of their intelligence is about +right.' + +'Well, anyhow,' persisted Slyme, 'I don't think it's a right thing that +they should be allowed to go marchin' about like that--driving visitors +out of the town.' + +'What do you think they ought to do, then?' demanded Owen. + +'Let the b--rs go to the bloody workhouse!' shouted Crass. + +'But before they could be received there they would have to be +absolutely homeless and destitute, and then the ratepayers would have +to keep them. It costs about twelve shillings a week for each inmate, +so it seems to me that it would be more sensible and economical for the +community to employ them on some productive work.' + +They had by this time arrived at the yard. The steps and ladders were +put away in their places and the dirty paint-pots and pails were placed +in the paint-shop on the bench and on the floor. With what had +previously been brought back there were a great many of these things, +all needing to be cleaned out, so Bert at any rate stood in no danger +of being out of employment for some time to come. + +When they were paid at the office, Owen on opening his envelope found +it contained as usual, a time sheet for the next week, which meant that +he was not 'stood off' although he did not know what work there would +be to do. Crass and Slyme were both to go to the 'Cave' to fix the +venetian blinds, and Sawkins also was to come to work as usual. + + + +Chapter 28 + +The Week before Christmas + + +During the next week Owen painted a sign on the outer wall of one of +the workshops at the yard, and he also wrote the name of the firm on +three of the handcarts. + +These and other odd jobs kept him employed a few hours every day, so +that he was not actually out of work. + +One afternoon--there being nothing to do--he went home at three +o'clock, but almost as soon as he reached the house Bert White came +with a coffin-plate which had to be written at once. The lad said he +had been instructed to wait for it. + +Nora gave the boy some tea and bread and butter to eat whilst Owen was +doing the coffin-plate, and presently Frankie--who had been playing out +in the street--made his appearance. The two boys were already known to +each other, for Bert had been there several times before--on errands +similar to the present one, or to take lessons on graining and +letter-painting from Owen. + +'I'm going to have a party next Monday--after Christmas,' remarked +Frankie. 'Mother told me I might ask you if you'll come?' + +'All right,' said Bert; 'and I'll bring my Pandoramer.' + +'What is it? Is it alive?' asked Frankie with a puzzled look. + +'Alive! No, of course not,' replied Bert with a superior air. 'It's a +show, like they have at the Hippodrome or the Circus.' + +'How big is it?' + +'Not very big: it's made out of a sugar-box. I made it myself. It's +not quite finished yet, but I shall get it done this week. There's a +band as well, you know. I do that part with this.' + +'This' was a large mouth organ which he produced from the inner pocket +of his coat. + +'Play something now.' + +Bert accordingly played, and Frankie sang at the top of his voice a +selection of popular songs, including 'The Old Bull and Bush', 'Has +Anyone seen a German Band?', 'Waiting at the Church' and +finally--possibly as a dirge for the individual whose coffin-plate Owen +was writing--'Goodbye, Mignonette' and 'I wouldn't leave my little +wooden hut for you'. + +'You don't know what's in that,' said Frankie, referring to a large +earthenware bread-pan which Nora had just asked Owen to help her to +lift from the floor on to one of the chairs. The vessel in question +was covered with a clean white cloth. + +'Christmas pudding,' replied Bert, promptly. + +'Guessed right first time!' cried Frankie. 'We got the things out of +the Christmas Club on Saturday. We've been paying in ever since last +Christmas. We're going to mix it now, and you can have a stir too if +you like, for luck.' + +Whilst they were stirring the pudding, Frankie several times requested +the others to feel his muscle: he said he felt sure that he would soon +be strong enough to go out to work, and he explained to Bert that the +extraordinary strength he possessed was to be attributed to the fact +that he lived almost exclusively on porridge and milk. + + + +For the rest of the week, Owen continued to work down at the yard with +Sawkins, Crass, and Slyme, painting some of the ladders, steps and +other plant belonging to the firm. These things had to have two coats +of paint and the name Rushton & Co. written on them. As soon as they +had got some of them second-coated, Owen went on with the writing, +leaving the painting for the others, so as to share the work as fairly +as possible. Several times during the week one or other of them was +taken away to do some other work; once Crass and Slyme had to go and +wash off and whiten a ceiling somewhere, and several times Sawkins was +sent out to assist the plumbers. + +Every day some of the men who had been 'stood off' called at the yard +to ask if any other 'jobs' had 'come in'. From these callers they +heard all the news. Old Jack Linden had not succeeded in getting +anything to do at the trade since he was discharged from Rushton's, and +it was reported that he was trying to earn a little money by hawking +bloaters from house to house. As for Philpot, he said that he had been +round to nearly all the firms in the town and none of them had any work +to speak of. + +Newman--the man whom the reader will remember was sacked for taking too +much pains with his work--had been arrested and sentenced to a month's +imprisonment because he had not been able to pay his poor rates, and +the Board of Guardians were allowing his wife three shillings a week to +maintain herself and the three children. Philpot had been to see them, +and she told him that the landlord was threatening to turn them into +the street; he would have seized their furniture and sold it if it had +been worth the expense of the doing. + +'I feel ashamed of meself,' Philpot added in confidence to Owen, 'when +I think of all the money I chuck away on beer. If it wasn't for that, +I shouldn't be in such a hole meself now, and I might be able to lend +'em a 'elpin' 'and.' + +'It ain't so much that I likes the beer, you know,' he continued; 'it's +the company. When you ain't got no 'ome, in a manner o' speakin', like +me, the pub's about the only place where you can get a little +enjoyment. But you ain't very welcome there unless you spends your +money.' + +'Is the three shillings all they have to live on?' + +'I think she goes out charin' when she can get it,' replied Philpot, +'but I don't see as she can do a great deal o' that with three young +'uns to look after, and from what I hear of it she's only just got over +a illness and ain't fit to do much.' + +'My God!' said Owen. + +'I'll tell you what,' said Philpot. 'I've been thinking we might get +up a bit of a subscription for 'em. There's several chaps in work what +knows Newman, and if they was each to give a trifle we could get enough +to pay for a Christmas dinner, anyway. I've brought a sheet of +foolscap with me, and I was goin' to ask you to write out the heading +for me.' + +As there was no pen available at the workshop, Philpot waited till four +o'clock and then accompanied Owen home, where the heading of the list +was written. Owen put his name down for a shilling and Philpot his for +a similar amount. + +Philpot stayed to tea and accepted an invitation to spend Christmas Day +with them, and to come to Frankie's party on the Monday after. + +The next morning Philpot brought the list to the yard and Crass and +Slyme put their names down for a shilling each, and Sawkins for +threepence, it being arranged that the money was to be paid on +payday--Christmas Eve. In the meantime, Philpot was to see as many as +he could of those who were in work, at other firms and get as many +subscriptions as possible. + +At pay-time on Christmas Eve Philpot turned up with the list and Owen +and the others paid him the amounts they had put their names down for. +From other men he had succeeded in obtaining nine and sixpence, mostly +in sixpences and threepences. Some of this money he had already +received, but for the most part he had made appointments with the +subscribers to call at their homes that evening. It was decided that +Owen should accompany him and also go with him to hand over the money +to Mrs Newman. + +It took them nearly three hours to get in all the money, for the places +they had to go to were in different localities, and in one or two cases +they had to wait because their man had not yet come home, and sometimes +it was not possible to get away without wasting a little time in talk. +In three instances those who had put their names down for threepence +increased the amount to sixpence and one who had promised sixpence gave +a shilling. There were two items of threepence each which they did not +get at all, the individuals who had put their names down having gone +upon the drunk. Another cause of delay was that they met or called on +several other men who had not yet been asked for a subscription, and +there were several others--including some members of the Painters +Society whom Owen had spoken to during the week--who had promised him +to give a subscription. In the end they succeeded in increasing the +total amount to nineteen and ninepence, and they then put +three-halfpence each to make it up to a pound. + +The Newmans lived in a small house the rent of which was six shillings +per week and taxes. To reach the house one had to go down a dark and +narrow passage between two shops, the house being in a kind of well, +surrounded by the high walls of the back parts of larger +buildings--chiefly business premises and offices. The air did not +circulate very freely in this place, and the rays of the sun never +reached it. In the summer the atmosphere was close and foul with the +various odours which came from the back-yards of the adjoining +buildings, and in the winter it was dark and damp and gloomy, a +culture-ground for bacteria and microbes. The majority of those who +profess to be desirous of preventing and curing the disease called +consumption must be either hypocrites or fools, for they ridicule the +suggestion that it is necessary first to cure and prevent the poverty +that compels badly clothed and half-starved human beings to sleep in +such dens as this. + +The front door opened into the living-room or, rather, kitchen, which +was dimly lighted by a small paraffin lamp on the table, where were +also some tea-cups and saucers, each of a different pattern, and the +remains of a loaf of bread. The wallpaper was old and discoloured; a +few almanacs and unframed prints were fixed to the walls, and on the +mantelshelf were some cracked and worthless vases and ornaments. At +one time they had possessed a clock and an overmantel and some framed +pictures, but they had all been sold to obtain money to buy food. +Nearly everything of any value had been parted with for the same +reason--the furniture, the pictures, the bedclothes, the carpet and the +oilcloth, piece by piece, nearly everything that had once constituted +the home--had been either pawned or sold to buy food or to pay rent +during the times when Newman was out of work--periods that had recurred +during the last few years with constantly increasing frequency and +duration. Now there was nothing left but these few old broken chairs +and the deal table which no one would buy; and upstairs, the wretched +bedsteads and mattresses whereon they slept at night, covering +themselves with worn-out remnants of blankets and the clothes they wore +during the day. + +In answer to Philpot's knock, the door was opened by a little girl +about seven years old, who at once recognized Philpot, and called out +his name to her mother, and the latter came also to the door, closely +followed by two other children, a little, fragile-looking girl about +three, and a boy about five years of age, who held on to her skirt and +peered curiously at the visitors. Mrs Newman was about thirty, and her +appearance confirmed the statement of Philpot that she had only just +recovered from an illness; she was very white and thin and +dejected-looking. When Philpot explained the object of their visit and +handed her the money, the poor woman burst into tears, and the two +smaller children--thinking that this piece of paper betokened some +fresh calamity--began to cry also. They remembered that all their +troubles had been preceded by the visits of men who brought pieces of +paper, and it was rather difficult to reassure them. + +That evening, after Frankie was asleep, Owen and Nora went out to do +their Christmas marketing. They had not much money to spend, for Owen +had brought home only seventeen shillings. He had worked thirty-three +hours--that came to nineteen and threepence--one shilling and +threehalfpence had gone on the subscription list, and he had given the +rest of the coppers to a ragged wreck of a man who was singing a hymn +in the street. The other shilling had been deducted from his wages in +repayment of a 'sub' he had had during the week. + +There was a great deal to be done with this seventeen shillings. First +of all there was the rent--seven shillings--that left ten. Then there +was the week's bread bill--one and threepence. They had a pint of milk +every day, chiefly for the boy's sake--that came to one and two. Then +there was one and eight for a hundredweight of coal that had been +bought on credit. Fortunately, there were no groceries to buy, for the +things they had obtained with their Christmas Club money would be more +than sufficient for the ensuing week. + +Frankie's stockings were all broken and beyond mending, so it was +positively necessary to buy him another pair for fivepence +three-farthings. These stockings were not much good--a pair at double +the price would have been much cheaper, for they would have lasted +three or four times longer; but they could not afford to buy the dearer +kind. It was just the same with the coal: if they had been able to +afford it, they could have bought a ton of the same class of coal for +twenty-six shillings, but buying it as they did, by the hundredweight, +they had to pay at the rate of thirty-three shillings and fourpence a +ton. It was just the same with nearly everything else. This is how +the working classes are robbed. Although their incomes are the lowest, +they are compelled to buy the most expensive articles--that is, the +lowest-priced articles. Everybody knows that good clothes, boots or +furniture are really the cheapest in the end, although they cost more +money at first; but the working classes can seldom or never afford to +buy good things; they have to buy cheap rubbish which is dear at any +price. + +Six weeks previously Owen bought a pair of second-hand boots for three +shillings and they were now literally falling to pieces. Nora's shoes +were in much the same condition, but, as she said, it did not matter so +much about hers because there was no need for her to go out if the +weather were not fine. + +In addition to the articles already mentioned, they had to spend +fourpence for half a gallon of paraffin oil, and to put sixpence into +the slot of the gas-stove. This reduced the money to five and +sevenpence farthing, and of this it was necessary to spend a shilling +on potatoes and other vegetables. + +They both needed some new underclothing, for what they had was so old +and worn that it was quite useless for the purpose it was supposed to +serve; but there was no use thinking of these things, for they had now +only four shillings and sevenpence farthing left, and all that would be +needed for toys. They had to buy something special for Frankie for +Christmas, and it would also be necessary to buy something for each of +the children who were coming to the party on the following Monday. +Fortunately, there was no meat to buy, for Nora had been paying into +the Christmas Club at the butcher's as well as at the grocer's. So +this necessary was already paid for. + +They stopped to look at the display of toys at Sweater's Emporium. For +several days past Frankie had been talking of the wonders contained in +these windows, so they wished if possible to buy him something here. +They recognized many of the things from the description the boy had +given of them, but nearly everything was so dear that for a long time +they looked in vain for something it would be possible to buy. + +'That's the engine he talks so much about,' said Non, indicating a +model railway locomotive; that one marked five shillings.' + +'It might just as well be marked five pounds as far as we're +concerned,' replied Owen. + +As they were speaking, one of the salesmen appeared at the back of the +window and, reaching forward, removed the engine. It was probably the +last one of the kind and had evidently just been sold. Owen and Nora +experienced a certain amount of consolation in knowing that even if +they had the money they would not have been able to buy it. + +After lengthy consideration, they decided on a clockwork engine at a +shilling, but the other toys they resolved to buy at a cheaper shop. +Nora went into the Emporium to get the toy and whilst Owen was waiting +for her Mr and Mrs Rushton came out. They did not appear to see Owen, +who observed that the shape of one of several parcels they carried +suggested that it contained the engine that had been taken from the +window a little while before. + +When Nora returned with her purchase, they went in search of a cheaper +place and after a time they found what they wanted. For sixpence they +bought a cardboard box that had come all the way from Japan and +contained a whole family of dolls--father, mother and four children of +different sizes. A box of paints, threepence: a sixpenny tea service, +a threepenny drawing slate, and a rag doll, sixpence. + +On their way home they called at a greengrocer's where Owen had ordered +and paid for a small Christmas tree a few weeks before; and as they +were turning the corner of the street where they lived they met Crass, +half-drunk, with a fine fat goose slung over his shoulder by its neck. +He greeted Owen jovially and held up the bird for their inspection. + +'Not a bad tanner's-worth, eh?' he hiccoughed. 'This makes two we've +got. I won this and a box of cigars--fifty--for a tanner, and the +other one I got out of the Club at our Church Mission 'all: threepence +a week for twenty-eight weeks; that makes seven bob. But,' he added, +confidentially,''you couldn't buy 'em for that price in a shop, you +know. They costs the committee a good bit more nor that--wholesale; +but we've got some rich gents on our committee and they makes up the +difference,' and with a nod and a cunning leer he lurched off. + +Frankie was sleeping soundly when they reached home, and so was the +kitten, which was curled up on the quilt on the foot of the bed. After +they had had some supper, although it was after eleven o'clock, Owen +fixed the tree in a large flower-pot that had served a similar purpose +before, and Nora brought out from the place where it had been stored +away since last Christmas a cardboard box containing a lot of +glittering tinsel ornaments--globes of silvered or gilded or painted +glass, birds, butterflies and stars. Some of these things had done +duty three Christmases ago and although they were in some instances +slightly tarnished most of them were as good as new. In addition to +these and the toys they had bought that evening they had a box of +bon-bons and a box of small wax candles, both of which had +formed part of the things they got from the grocer's with the Christmas +Club money; and there were also a lot of little paper bags of +sweets, and a number of sugar and chocolate toys and animals which had +been bought two or three at a time for several weeks past and put away +for this occasion. There was something suitable for each child that +was coming, with the exception of Bert White; they had intended to +include a sixpenny pocket knife for him in their purchases that +evening, but as they had not been able to afford this Owen decided to +give him an old set of steel graining combs which he knew the lad had +often longed to possess. The tin case containing these tools was +accordingly wrapped in some red tissue paper and hung on the tree with +the other things. + +They moved about as quietly as possible so as not to disturb those who +were sleeping in the rooms beneath, because long before they were +finished the people in the other parts of the house had all retired to +rest, and silence had fallen on the deserted streets outside. As they +were putting the final touches to their work the profound stillness of +the night was suddenly broken by the voices of a band of carol-singers. + +The sound overwhelmed them with memories of other and happier times, +and Nora stretched out her hands impulsively to Owen, who drew her +close to his side. + +They had been married just over eight years, and although during all +that time they had never been really free from anxiety for the future, +yet on no previous Christmas had they been quite so poor as now. During +the last few years periods of unemployment had gradually become more +frequent and protracted, and the attempt he had made in the early part +of the year to get work elsewhere had only resulted in plunging them +into even greater poverty than before. But all the same there was much +to be thankful for: poor though they were, they were far better off +than many thousands of others: they still had food and shelter, and +they had each other and the boy. + +Before they went to bed Owen carried the tree into Frankie's bedroom +and placed it so that he would be able to see it in all its glittering +glory as soon as he awoke on Christmas morning. + + + +Chapter 29 + +The Pandorama + + +Although the party was not supposed to begin till six o'clock, Bert +turned up at half past four, bringing the 'Pandoramer' with him. + +At about half past five the other guests began to arrive. Elsie and +Charley Linden came first, the girl in a pretty blue frock trimmed with +white lace, and Charley resplendent in a new suit, which, like his +sister's dress, had been made out of somebody's cast-off clothes that +had been given to their mother by a visiting lady. It had taken Mrs +Linden many hours of hard work to contrive these garments; in fact, +more time than the things were worth, for although they looked all +right--especially Elsie's--the stuff was so old that it would not wear +very long: but this was the only way in which she could get clothes for +the children at all: she certainly could not afford to buy them any. +So she spent hours and hours making things that she knew would fall to +pieces almost as soon as they were made. + +After these came Nellie, Rosie and Tommy Newman. These presented a +much less prosperous appearance than the other two. Their mother was +not so skilful at contriving new clothes out of old. Nellie was +wearing a grown-up woman's blouse, and by way of ulster she had on an +old-fashioned jacket of thick cloth with large pearl buttons. This was +also a grown-up woman's garment: it was shaped to fit the figure of a +tall woman with wide shoulders and a small waist; consequently, it did +not fit Nellie to perfection. The waist reached below the poor child's +hips. + +Tommy was arrayed in the patched remains of what had once been a good +suit of clothes. They had been purchased at a second-hand shop last +summer and had been his 'best' for several months, but they were now +much too small for him. + +Little Rosie--who was only just over three years old--was better off +than either of the other two, for she had a red cloth dress that fitted +her perfectly: indeed, as the district visitor who gave it to her +mother had remarked, it looked as if it had been made for her. + +'It's not much to look at,' observed Nellie, referring to her big +jacket, but all the same we was very glad of it when the rain came on.' + +The coat was so big that by withdrawing her arms from the sleeves and +using it as a cloak or shawl she had managed to make it do for all +three of them. + +Tommy's boots were so broken that the wet had got in and saturated his +stockings, so Nora made him take them all off and wear some old ones of +Frankie's whilst his own were drying at the fire. + +Philpot, with two large paper bags full of oranges and nuts, arrived +just as they were sitting down to tea--or rather cocoa--for with the +exception of Bert all the children expressed a preference for the +latter beverage. Bert would have liked to have cocoa also, but hearing +that the grown-ups were going to have tea, he thought it would be more +manly to do the same. This question of having tea or cocoa for tea +became a cause of much uproarious merriment on the part of the +children, who asked each other repeatedly which they liked best, 'tea +tea?' or 'cocoa tea?' They thought it so funny that they said it over +and over again, screaming with laughter all the while, until Tommy got +a piece of cake stuck in his throat and became nearly black in the +face, and then Philpot had to turn him upside down and punch him in the +back to save him from choking to death. This rather sobered the +others, but for some time afterwards whenever they looked at each other +they began to laugh afresh because they thought it was such a good joke. + +When they had filled themselves up with the 'cocoa-tea' and cakes and +bread and jam, Elsie Linden and Nellie Newman helped to clear away the +cups and saucers, and then Owen lit the candles on the Christmas tree +and distributed the toys to the children, and a little while afterwards +Philpot--who had got a funny-looking mask out of one of the +bon-bons--started a fine game pretending to be a dreadful wild animal +which he called a Pandroculus, and crawling about on all fours, rolled +his goggle eyes and growled out he must have a little boy or girl to +eat for his supper. + +He looked so terrible that although they knew it was only a joke they +were almost afraid of him, and ran away laughing and screaming to +shelter themselves behind Nora or Owen; but all the same, whenever +Philpot left off playing, they entreated him to 'be it again', and so +he had to keep on being a Pandroculus, until exhaustion compelled him +to return to his natural form. + +After this they all sat round the table and had a game of cards; +'Snap', they called it, but nobody paid much attention to the rules of +the game: everyone seemed to think that the principal thing to do was +to kick up as much row as possible. After a while Philpot suggested a +change to 'Beggar my neighbour', and won quite a lot of cards before +they found out that he had hidden all the jacks in the pocket of his +coat, and then they mobbed him for a cheat. He might have been +seriously injured if it had not been for Bert, who created a diversion +by standing on a chair and announcing that he was about to introduce to +their notice 'Bert White's World-famed Pandorama' as exhibited before +all the nobility and crowned heads of Europe, England, Ireland and +Scotland, including North America and Wales. + +Loud cheers greeted the conclusion of Bert's speech. The box was +placed on the table, which was then moved to the end of the room, and +the chairs were ranged in two rows in front. + +The 'Pandorama' consisted of a stage-front made of painted cardboard +and fixed on the front of a wooden box about three feet long by two +feet six inches high, and about one foot deep from back to front. The +'Show' was a lot of pictures cut out of illustrated weekly papers and +pasted together, end to end, so as to form a long strip or ribbon. Bert +had all the pictures with water-colours. + +Just behind the wings of the stage-front at each end of the box--was an +upright roller, and the long strip of pictures was rolled up on this. +The upper ends of the rollers came through the top of the box and had +handles attached to them. When these handles were turned the pictures +passed across the stage, unrolling from one roller and rolling on to +the other, and were illuminated by the light of three candles placed +behind. + +The idea of constructing this machine had been suggested to Bert by a +panorama entertainment he had been to see some time before. + +'The Style of the decorations,' he remarked, alluding to the painted +stage-front, 'is Moorish.' + +He lit the candles at the back of the stage and, having borrowed a +tea-tray from Nora, desired the audience to take their seats. When +they had all done so, he requested Owen to put out the lamp and the +candles on the tree, and then he made another speech, imitating the +manner of the lecturer at the panorama entertainment before mentioned. + +'Ladies and Gentlemen: with your kind permission I am about to +hinterduce to your notice some pitchers of events in different parts of +the world. As each pitcher appears on the stage I will give a short +explanation of the subject, and afterwards the band will play a +suitable collection of appropriated music, consisting of hymns and all +the latest and most popular songs of the day, and the audience is +kindly requested to join in the chorus. + +'Our first scene,' continued Bert as he turned the handles and brought +the picture into view, 'represents the docks at Southampton; the +magnificent steamer which you see lying alongside the shore is the ship +which is waiting to take us to foreign parts. As we have already paid +our fare, we will now go on board and set sail.' + +As an accompaniment to this picture Bert played the tune of 'Goodbye, +Dolly, I must leave you', and by the time the audience had finished +singing the chorus he had rolled on another scene, which depicted a +dreadful storm at sea, with a large ship evidently on the point of +foundering. The waves were running mountains high and the inky clouds +were riven by forked lightning. To increase the terrifying effect, +Bert rattled the tea tray and played 'The Bay of Biscay', and the +children sung the chorus whilst he rolled the next picture into view. +This scene showed the streets of a large city; mounted police with +drawn swords were dispersing a crowd: several men had been ridden down +and were being trampled under the hoofs of the horses, and a number of +others were bleeding profusely from wounds on the head and face. + +'After a rather stormy passage we arrives safely at the beautiful city +of Berlin, in Germany, just in time to see a procession of unemployed +workmen being charged by the military police. This picture is +hintitled "Tariff Reform means Work for All".' + +As an appropriate musical selection Bert played the tune of a +well-known song, and the children sang the words: + + 'To be there! to be there! + Oh, I knew what it was to be there! + And when they tore me clothes, + Blacked me eyes and broke me nose, + Then I knew what it was to be there!' + +During the singing Bert turned the handles backwards and again brought +on the picture of the storm at sea. + +'As we don't want to get knocked on the 'ed, we clears out of Berlin as +soon as we can--whiles we're safe--and once more embarks on our gallint +ship' and after a few more turns of the 'andle we finds ourselves back +once more in Merry Hingland, where we see the inside of a blacksmith's +shop with a lot of half-starved women making iron chains. They work +seventy hours a week for seven shillings. Our next scene is hintitled +"The Hook and Eye Carders". 'Ere we see the inside of a room in +Slumtown, with a mother and three children and the old grandmother +sewin' hooks and eyes on cards to be sold in drapers' shops. It ses +underneath the pitcher that 384 hooks and 384 eyes has to be joined +together and sewed on cards for one penny.' + +While this picture was being rolled away the band played and the +children sang with great enthusiasm: + + 'Rule, Brittania, Brittania rules the waves! + Britons, never, never, never shall be slaves!' + +'Our next picture is called "An Englishman's Home". 'Ere we see the +inside of another room in Slumtown, with the father and mother and four +children sitting down to dinner--bread and drippin' and tea. It ses +underneath the pitcher that there's Thirteen millions of people in +England always on the verge of starvation. These people that you see +in the pitcher might be able to get a better dinner than this if it +wasn't that most of the money wot the bloke earns 'as to pay the rent. +Again we turns the 'andle and presently we comes to another very +beautiful scene--"Early Morning in Trafalgar Square". 'Ere we see a +lot of Englishmen who have been sleepin' out all night because they +ain't got no 'omes to go to.' + +As a suitable selection for this picture, Bert played the tune of a +music-hall song, the words of which were familiar to all the +youngsters, who sang at the top of their voices: + + 'I live in Trafalgar Square, + With four lions to guard me, + Pictures and statues all over the place, + Lord Nelson staring me straight in the face, + Of course it's rather draughty, + But still I'm sure you'll agree, + If it's good enough for Lord Nelson, + It's quite good enough for me.' + +'Next we 'ave a view of the dining-hall at the Topside Hotel in London, +where we see the tables set for a millionaires' banquet. The forks and +spoons is made of solid gold and the plates is made of silver. The +flowers that you see on the tables and 'angin' down from the ceilin' +and on the walls is worth L2,000 and it cost the bloke wot give the +supper over L30,000 for this one beano. A few more turns of the 'andle +shows us another glorious banquet--the King of Rhineland being +entertained by the people of England. Next we finds ourselves looking +on at the Lord Mayor's supper at the Mansion House. All the fat men +that you see sittin' at the tables is Liberal and Tory Members of +Parlimint. After this we 'ave a very beautiful pitcher hintitled "Four +footed Haristocrats". 'Ere you see Lady Slumrent's pet dogs sittin' up +on chairs at their dinner table with white linen napkins tied round +their necks, eatin' orf silver plates like human people and being +waited on by real live waiters in hevening dress. Lady Slumrent is +very fond of her pretty pets and she does not allow them to be fed on +anything but the very best food; they gets chicken, rump steak, mutton +chops, rice pudding, jelly and custard.' + +'I wished I was a pet dog, don't you?' remarked Tommy Newman to Charley +Linden. + +'Not arf!' replied Charley. + +'Here we see another unemployed procession,' continued Bert as he +rolled another picture into sight; '2,000 able-bodied men who are not +allowed to work. Next we see the hinterior of a Hindustrial +'Ome--Blind children and s working for their living. Our next +scene is called "Cheap Labour". 'Ere we see a lot of small boys about +twelve and thirteen years old bein' served out with their Labour +Stifficats, which gives 'em the right to go to work and earn money to +help their unemployed fathers to pay the slum rent. + +'Once more we turns the 'andle and brings on one of our finest scenes. +This lovely pitcher is hintitled "The Hangel of Charity", and shows us +the beautiful Lady Slumrent seated at the table in a cosy corner of 'er +charmin' boodore, writin' out a little cheque for the relief of the +poor of Slumtown. + +'Our next scene is called "The Rival Candidates, or, a Scene during the +General Election". On the left you will observe, standin' up in a +motor car, a swell bloke with a eyeglass stuck in one eye, and a +overcoat with a big fur collar and cuffs, addressing the crowd: this is +the Honourable Augustus Slumrent, the Conservative candidate. On the +other side of the road we see another motor car and another swell bloke +with a round pane of glass in one eye and a overcoat with a big fur +collar and cuffs, standing up in the car and addressin' the crowd. This +is Mr Mandriver, the Liberal candidate. The crowds of shabby-lookin' +chaps standin' round the motor cars wavin' their 'ats and cheerin' is +workin' men. Both the candidates is tellin' 'em the same old story, +and each of 'em is askin' the workin' men to elect 'im to Parlimint, +and promisin' to do something or other to make things better for the +lower horders.' + +As an appropriate selection to go with this picture, Bert played the +tune of a popular song, the words being well known to the children, who +sang enthusiastically, clapping their hands and stamping their feet on +the floor in time with the music: + + 'We've both been there before, + Many a time, many a time! + We've both been there before, + Many a time! + Where many a gallon of beer has gone. + To colour his nose and mine, + We've both been there before, + Many a time, many a time!' + +At the conclusion of the singing, Bert turned another picture into view. + +''Ere we 'ave another election scene. At each side we see the two +candidates the same as in the last pitcher. In the middle of the road +we see a man lying on the ground, covered with blood, with a lot of +Liberal and Tory working men kickin' 'im, jumpin' on 'im, and stampin' +on 'is face with their 'obnailed boots. The bloke on the ground is a +Socialist, and the reason why they're kickin' 'is face in is because 'e +said that the only difference between Slumrent and Mandriver was that +they was both alike.' + +While the audience were admiring this picture, Bert played another +well-known tune, and the children sang the words: + + 'Two lovely black eyes, + Oh what a surprise! + Only for telling a man he was wrong, + Two lovely black eyes.' + +Bert continued to turn the handles of the rollers and a long succession +of pictures passed across the stage, to the delight of the children, +who cheered and sang as occasion demanded, but the most enthusiastic +outburst of all greeted the appearance of the final picture, which was +a portrait of the King. Directly the children saw it--without waiting +for the band--they gave three cheers and began to sing the chorus of +the National Anthem. + +A round of applause for Bert concluded the Pandorama performance; the +lamp and the candles of the Christmas tree were relit--for although all +the toys had been taken off, the tree still made a fine show with the +shining glass ornaments--and then they had some more games; blind man's +buff, a tug-of-war--in which Philpot was defeated with great +laughter--and a lot of other games. And when they were tired of these, +each child 'said a piece' or sung a song, learnt specially for the +occasion. The only one who had not come prepared in this respect was +little Rosie, and even she--so as to be the same as the +others--insisted on reciting the only piece she knew. Kneeling on the +hearthrug, she put her hands together, palm to palm, and shutting her +eyes very tightly she repeated the verse she always said every night +before going to bed: + + 'Gentle Jesus, meek and mild, + Look on me, a little child. + Pity my simplicity, + Suffer me to come to Thee.' + +Then she stood up and kissed everyone in turn, and Philpot crossed over +and began looking out of the window, and coughed, and blew his nose, +because a nut that he had been eating had gone down the wrong way. + +Most of them were by this time quite tired out, so after some supper +the party broke up. Although they were nearly all very sleepy, none of +them were very willing to go, but they were consoled by the thought of +another entertainment to which they were going later on in the +week--the Band of Hope Tea and Prize Distribution at the Shining Light +Chapel. + +Bert undertook to see Elsie and Charley safely home, and Philpot +volunteered to accompany Nellie and Tommy Newman, and to carry Rosie, +who was so tired that she fell asleep on his shoulder before they left +the house. + +As they were going down the stairs Frankie held a hurried consultation +with his mother, with the result that he was able to shout after them +an invitation to come again next Christmas. + + + +Chapter 30 + +The Brigands hold a Council of War + + +It being now what is usually called the festive season--possibly +because at this period of the year a greater number of people are +suffering from hunger and cold than at any other time--the reader will +not be surprised at being invited to another little party which took +place on the day after the one we have just left. The scene was Mr +Sweater's office. Mr Sweater was seated at his desk, but with his +chair swung round to enable him to face his guests--Messrs Rushton, +Didlum, and Grinder, who were also seated. + +'Something will 'ave to be done, and that very soon,' Grinder was +saying. 'We can't go on much longer as we're doing at present. For my +part, I think the best thing to do is to chuck up the sponge at once; +the company is practically bankrupt now, and the longer we waits the +worser it will be.' + +'That's just my opinion,' said Didlum dejectedly. 'If we could supply +the electric light at the same price as gas, or a little cheaper, we +might have some chance; but we can't do it. The fact is that the +machinery we've got is no dam good; it's too small and it's wore out, +consequently the light we supply is inferior to gas and costs more.' + +'Yes, I think we're fairly beaten this time,' said Rushton. 'Why, even +if the Gas Coy hadn't moved their works beyond the borough boundary, +still we shouldn't 'ave been hable to compete with 'em.' + +'Of course not,' said Grinder. 'The truth of the matter is just wot +Didlum says. Our machinery is too small, it's worn hout, and good for +nothing but to be throwed on the scrap-heap. So there's only one thing +left to do and that is--go into liquidation.' + +'I don't see it,' remarked Sweater. + +'Well, what do you propose, then?' demanded Grinder. 'Reconstruct the +company? Ask the shareholders for more money? Pull down the works and +build fresh, and buy some new machinery? And then most likely not make +a do of it after all? Not for me, old chap! I've 'ad enough. You +won't catch me chuckin' good money after bad in that way.' + +'Nor me neither,' said Rushton. + +'Dead orf!' remarked Didlum, very decidedly. + +Sweater laughed quietly. 'I'm not such a fool as to suggest anything +of that sort,' he said. 'You seem to forget that I am one of the +largest shareholders myself. No. What I propose is that we Sell Out.' + +'Sell out!' replied Grinder with a contemptuous laugh in which the +others joined. 'Who's going to buy the shares of a concern that's +practically bankrupt and never paid a dividend?' + +'I've tried to sell my little lot several times already,' said Didlum +with a sickly smile, 'but nobody won't buy 'em.' + +'Who's to buy?' repeated Sweater, replying to Grinder. 'The +municipality of course! The ratepayers. Why shouldn't Mugsborough go +in for Socialism as well as other towns?' + +Rushton, Didlum and Grinder fairly gasped for breath: the audacity of +the chief's proposal nearly paralysed them. + +'I'm afraid we should never git away with it,' ejaculated Didlum, as +soon as he could speak. 'When the people tumbled to it, there'd be no +hend of a row.' + +'PEOPLE! ROW!' replied Sweater, scornfully. 'The majority of the +people will never know anything about it! Listen to me--' + +'Are you quite sure as we can't be over'eard?' interrupted Rushton, +glancing nervously at the door and round the office. + +'It's all right,' answered Sweater, who nevertheless lowered his voice +almost to a whisper, and the others drew their chairs closer and bent +forward to listen. + +'You know we still have a little money in hand: well, what I propose is +this: At the annual meeting, which, as you know, comes off next week, +we'll arrange for the Secretary to read a highly satisfactory report, +and we'll declare a dividend of 15 per cent--we can arrange it somehow +between us. Of course, we'll have to cook the accounts a little, but +I'll see that it's done properly. The other shareholders are not going +to ask any awkward questions, and we all understand each other.' + +Sweater paused, and regarded the other three brigands intently. 'Do +you follow me?' he asked. + +'Yes, yes,' said Didlum eagerly. 'Go on with it.' And Rushton and +Grinder nodded assent. + +'Afterwards,' resumed Sweater, 'I'll arrange for a good report of the +meeting to appear in the Weekly Ananias. I'll instruct the Editor to +write it himself, and I'll tell him just what to say. I'll also get +him to write a leading article about it, saying that electricity is +sure to supersede gas for lighting purposes in the very near future. +Then the article will go on to refer to the huge profits made by the +Gas Coy and to say how much better it would have been if the town had +bought the gasworks years ago, so that those profits might have been +used to reduce the rates, the same as has been done in other towns. +Finally, the article will declare that it's a great pity that the +Electric Light Supply should be in the hands of a private company, and +to suggest that an effort be made to acquire it for the town. + +'In the meantime we can all go about--in a very quiet and judicious +way, of course--bragging about what a good thing we've got, and saying +we don't mean to sell. We shall say that we've overcome all the +initial expenses and difficulties connected with the installation of +the works--that we are only just beginning to reap the reward of our +industry and enterprise, and so on. + +'Then,' continued the Chief, 'we can arrange for it to be proposed in +the Council that the Town should purchase the Electric Light Works.' + +'But not by one of us four, you know,' said Grinder with a cunning leer. + +'Certainly not; that would give the show away at once. There are, as +you know--several members of the Band who are not shareholders in the +company; we'll get some of them to do most of the talking. We, being +the directors of the company, must pretend to be against selling, and +stick out for our own price; and when we do finally consent we must +make out that we are sacrificing our private interests for the good of +the Town. We'll get a committee appointed--we'll have an expert +engineer down from London--I know a man that will suit our purpose +admirably--we'll pay him a trifle and he'll say whatever we tell him +to--and we'll rush the whole business through before you can say "Jack +Robinson", and before the rate-payers have time to realize what's being +done. Not that we need worry ourselves much about them. Most of them +take no interest in public affairs, but even if there is something +said, it won't matter much to us once we've got the money. It'll be a +nine days' wonder and then we'll hear no more of it.' + +As the Chief ceased speaking, the other brigands also remained silent, +speechless with admiration of his cleverness. + +'Well, what do you think of it?' he asked. + +'Think of it!' cried Grinder, enthusiastically. 'I think it's +splendid! Nothing could be better. If we can honly git away with it, +I reckon it'll be one of the smartest thing we've ever done.' + +'Smart ain't the word for it,' observed Rushton. + +'There's no doubt it's a grand idear!' exclaimed Didlum, 'and I've just +thought of something else that might be done to help it along. We could +arrange to 'ave a lot of letters sent "To the Editor of the Obscurer" +and "To the Editor of the Ananias," and "To the Editor of the Weekly +Chloroform" in favour of the scheme.' + +'Yes, that's a very good idea,' said Grinder. 'For that matter the +editors could write them to themselves and sign them "Progress", +"Ratepayer", "Advance Mugsborough", and sich-like.' + +'Yes, that's all right,' said the Chief, thoughtfully, 'but we must be +careful not to overdo it; of course there will have to be a certain +amount of publicity, but we don't want to create too much interest in +it.' + +'Come to think of it,' observed Rushton arrogantly, 'why should we +trouble ourselves about the opinion of the ratepayers at all? Why +should we trouble to fake the books, or declare a dividend or 'ave the +harticles in the papers or anything else? We've got the game in our +own 'ands; we've got a majority in the Council, and, as Mr Sweater ses, +very few people even take the trouble to read the reports of the +meetings.' + +'Yes, that's right enough,' said Grinder. 'But it's just them few wot +would make a lot of trouble and talk; THEY'RE the very people we 'as to +think about. If we can only manage to put THEM in a fog we'll be all +right, and the way to do it is as Mr Sweater proposes.' + +'Yes, I think so,' said the Chief. 'We must be very careful. I can +work it all right in the Ananias and the Chloroform, and of course +you'll see that the Obscurer backs us up.' + +'I'll take care of that,' said Grinder, grimly. + +The three local papers were run by limited companies. Sweater held +nearly all the shares of the Ananias and of the Weekly Chloroform, and +controlled their policy and contents. Grinder occupied the same +position with regard to the Obscurer. The editors were a sort of +marionettes who danced as Sweater and Grinder pulled the strings. + +'I wonder how Dr Weakling will take it?' remarked Rushton. + +'That's the very thing I was just thinkin' about,' cried Didlum. 'Don't +you think it would be a good plan if we could arrange to 'ave somebody +took bad--you know, fall down in a fit or something in the street just +outside the Town 'All just before the matter is brought forward in the +Council, and then 'ave someone to come and call 'im out to attend to +the party wot's ill, and keep 'im out till the business is done.' + +'Yes, that's a capital idear,' said Grinder thoughtfully. 'But who +could we get to 'ave the fit? It would 'ave to be someone we could +trust, you know.' + +''Ow about Rushton? You wouldn't mind doin' it, would yer?' inquired +Didlum. + +'I should strongly object,' said Rushton haughtily. He regarded the +suggestion that he should act such an undignified part, as a kind of +sacrilege. + +'Then I'll do it meself if necessary,' said Didlum. 'I'm not proud +when there's money to be made; anything for an honest living.' + +'Well, I think we're all agreed, so far,' remarked Sweater. The others +signified assent. + +'And I think we all deserve a drink,' the Chief continued, producing a +decanter and a box of cigars from a cupboard by the side of his desk. +'Pass that water bottle from behind you, Didlum.' + +'I suppose nobody won't be comin' in?' said the latter, anxiously. 'I'm +a teetotaler, you know.' + +'Oh, it's all right,' said Sweater, taking four glasses out of the +cupboard and pouring out the whisky. 'I've given orders that we're not +to be disturbed for anyone. Say when.' + +'Well, 'ere's success to Socialism,' cried Grinder, raising his glass, +and taking a big drink. + +'Amen--'ear, 'ear, I mean,' said Didlum, hastily correcting himself. + +'Wot I likes about this 'ere business is that we're not only doin' +ourselves a bit of good,' continued Grinder with a laugh, 'we're not +only doin' ourselves a bit of good, but we're likewise doin' the +Socialists a lot of 'arm. When the ratepayers 'ave bought the Works, +and they begins to kick up a row because they're losin' money over +it--we can tell 'em that it's Socialism! And then they'll say that if +that's Socialism they don't want no more of it.' + +The other brigands laughed gleefully, and some of Didlum's whisky went +down the wrong way and nearly sent him into a fit. + +'You might as well kill a man at once,' he protested as he wiped the +tears from his eyes, 'you might as well kill a man at once as choke 'im +to death.' + +'And now I've got a bit of good news for you,' said the Chief as he put +his empty glass down. + +The others became serious at once. + +'Although we've had a very rough time of it in our contest with the +Gasworks Company, and although we've got the worst of it, it hasn't +been all lavender for them, you know. They've not enjoyed themselves +either: we hit them pretty hard when we put up the coal dues.' + +'A damn good job too,' said Grinder malignantly. + +'Well,' continued Sweater, 'they're just as sick of the fight as they +want to be, because of course they don't know exactly how badly we've +been hit. For all they know, we could have continued the struggle +indefinitely: and--well, to make a long story short, I've had a talk +with the managing director and one or two others, and they're willing +to let us in with them. So that we can put the money we get for the +Electric Light Works into gas shares!' + +This was such splendid news that they had another drink on the strength +of it, and Didlum said that one of the first things they would have to +do would be to totally abolish the Coal Dues, because they pressed so +hard on the poor. + + + +Chapter 31 + +The Deserter + + +About the end of January, Slyme left Easton's. The latter had not +succeeded in getting anything to do since the work at 'The Cave' was +finished, and latterly the quality of the food had been falling off. +The twelve shillings Slyme paid for his board and lodging was all that +Ruth had to keep house with. She had tried to get some work to do +herself, but generally without success; there were one or two jobs that +she might have had if she had been able to give her whole time to them, +but of course that was not possible; the child and the housework had to +be attended to, and Slyme's meals had to be prepared. Nevertheless, she +contrived to get away several times when she had a chance of earning a +few shillings by doing a day's charing for some lady or other, and then +she left everything in such order at home that Easton was able to +manage all right while she was away. On these occasions, she usually +left the baby with Owen's wife, who was an old schoolmate of hers. +Nora was the more willing to render her this service because Frankie +used to be so highly delighted whenever it happened. He never tired of +playing with the child, and for several days afterwards he used to +worry his mother with entreaties to buy a baby of their own. + +Easton earned a few shillings occasionally; now and then he got a job +to clean windows, and once or twice he did a few days' or hours' work +with some other painter who had been fortunate enough to get a little +job 'on his own'--such as a ceiling to wash and whiten, or a room or +two to paint; but such jobs were few. + +Sometimes, when they were very hard up, they sold something; the Bible +that used to lie on the little table in the bay window was one of the +first things to be parted with. Ruth erased the inscription from the +fly-leaf and then they sold the book at a second-hand shop for two +shillings. As time went on, they sold nearly everything that was +saleable, except of course, the things that were obtained on the hire +system. + +Slyme could see that they were getting very much into debt and behind +with the rent, and on two occasions already Easton had borrowed five +shillings from him, which he might never be able to pay back. Another +thing was that Slyme was always in fear that Ruth--who had never wholly +abandoned herself to wrongdoing--might tell Easton what had happened; +more than once she had talked of doing so, and the principal reason why +she refrained was that she knew that even if he forgave her, he could +never think the same of her as before. Slyme repeatedly urged this +view upon her, pointing out that no good could result from such a +confession. + +Latterly the house had become very uncomfortable. It was not only that +the food was bad and that sometimes there was no fire, but Ruth and +Easton were nearly always quarrelling about something or other. She +scarcely spoke to Slyme at all, and avoided sitting at the table with +him whenever possible. He was in constant dread that Easton might +notice her manner towards him, and seek for some explanation. +Altogether the situation was so unpleasant that Slyme determined to +clear out. He made the excuse that he had been offered a few weeks' +work at a place some little distance outside the town. After he was +gone they lived for several weeks in semi-starvation on what credit +they could get and by selling the furniture or anything else they +possessed that could be turned into money. The things out of Slyme's +room were sold almost directly he left. + + + +Chapter 32 + +The Veteran + + +Old Jack Linden had tried hard to earn a little money by selling +bloaters, but they often went bad, and even when he managed to sell +them all the profit was so slight that it was not worth doing. + +Before the work at 'The Cave' was finished, Philpot was a good friend +to them; he frequently gave old Jack sixpence or a shilling and often +brought a bag of cakes or buns for the children. Sometimes he came to +tea with them on Sundays as an excuse for bringing a tin of salmon. + +Elsie and Charley frequently went to Owen's house to take tea with +Frankie; in fact, whilst Owen had anything to do, they almost lived +there, for both Owen and Nora, knowing that the Lindens had nothing to +live on except the earnings of the young woman, encouraged the children +to come often. + +Old Jack made some hopeless attempts to get work--work of any kind, but +nobody wanted him; and to make things worse, his eyesight, which had +been failing for a long time, became very bad. Once he was given a job +by a big provision firm to carry an advertisement about the streets. +The man who had been carrying it before--an old soldier--had been +sacked the previous day for getting drunk while on duty. The +advertisement was not an ordinary pair of sandwich boards, but a sort +of box without any bottom or lid, a wooden frame, four sides covered +with canvas, on which were pasted printed bills advertising margarine. +Each side of this box or frame was rather larger than an ordinary +sandwich board. + +Old Linden had to get inside this thing and carry it about the streets; +two straps fixed across the top of the frame and passing one over each +of his shoulders enabled him to carry it. It swayed about a good deal +as he walked along, especially when the wind caught it, but there were +two handles inside to hold it steady by. The pay was eighteenpence a +day, and he had to travel a certain route, up and down the busiest +streets. + +At first the frame did not feel very heavy, but the weight seemed to +increase as the time went on, and the straps hurt his shoulders. He +felt very much ashamed, also, whenever he encountered any of his old +mates, some of whom laughed at him. + +In consequence of the frame requiring so much attention to keep it +steady, and being unused to the work, and his sight so bad, he several +times narrowly escaped being run over. Another thing that added to his +embarrassment was the jeering of the other sandwichmen, the loafers +outside the public houses, and the boys, who shouted 'old Jack in the +box' after him. Sometimes the boys threw refuse at the frame, and once +a decayed orange thrown by one of them knocked his hat off. + +By the time evening came he was scarcely able to stand for weariness. +His shoulders, his legs and his feet ached terribly, and as he was +taking the thing back to the shop he was accosted by a ragged, +dirty-looking, beer-sodden old man whose face was inflamed with drink +and fury. 'This was the old soldier who had been discharged the +previous day. He cursed and swore in the most awful manner and accused +Linden of 'taking the bread out of his mouth', and, shaking his fist +fiercely at him, shouted that he had a good mind to knock his face +through his head and out of the back of his neck. He might possibly +have tried to put this threat into practice but for the timely +appearance of a policeman, when he calmed down at once and took himself +off. + +Jack did not go back the next day; he felt that he would rather starve +than have any more of the advertisement frame, and after this he seemed +to abandon all hope of earning money: wherever he went it was the +same--no one wanted him. So he just wandered about the streets +aimlessly, now and then meeting an old workmate who asked him to have a +drink, but this was not often, for nearly all of them were out of work +and penniless. + + + +Chapter 33 + +The Soldier's Children + + +During most of this time, Jack Linden's daughter-in-law had 'Plenty of +Work', making blouses and pinafores for Sweater & Co. She had so much +to do that one might have thought that the Tory Millennium had arrived, +and that Tariff Reform was already an accomplished fact. + +She had Plenty of Work. + +At first they had employed her exclusively on the cheapest kind of +blouses--those that were paid for at the rate of two shillings a dozen, +but they did not give her many of that sort now. She did the work so +neatly that they kept her busy on the better qualities, which did not +pay her so well, because although she was paid more per dozen, there +was a great deal more work in them than in the cheaper kinds. Once she +had a very special one to make, for which she was paid six shillings; +but it took her four and a half days--working early and late--to do it. +The lady who bought this blouse was told that it came from Paris, and +paid three guineas for it. But of course Mrs Linden knew nothing of +that, and even if she had known, it would have made no difference to +her. + +Most of the money she earned went to pay the rent, and sometimes there +was only two or three shillings left to buy food for all of them: +sometimes not even so much, because although she had Plenty of Work she +was not always able to do it. There were times when the strain of +working the machine was unendurable: her shoulders ached, her arms +became cramped, and her eyes pained so that it was impossible to +continue. Then for a change she would leave the sewing and do some +housework. + +Once, when they owed four weeks' rent, the agent was so threatening +that they were terrified at the thought of being sold up and turned out +of the house, and so she decided to sell the round mahogany table and +some of the other things out of the sitting-room. Nearly all the +furniture that was in the house now belonged to her, and had formed her +home before her husband died. The old people had given most of their +things away at different times to their other sons since she had come +to live there. These men were all married and all in employment. One +was a fitter at the gasworks; the second was a railway porter, and the +other was a butcher; but now that the old man was out of work they +seldom came to the house. The last time they had been there was on +Christmas Eve, and then there had been such a terrible row between them +that the children had been awakened by it and frightened nearly out of +their lives. The cause of the row was that some time previously they +had mutually agreed to each give a shilling a week to the old people. +They had done this for three weeks and after that the butcher had +stopped his contribution: it had occurred to him that he was not to be +expected to help to keep his brother's widow and her children. If the +old people liked to give up the house and go to live in a room +somewhere by themselves, he would continue paying his shilling a week, +but not otherwise. Upon this the railway porter and the gas-fitter +also ceased paying. They said it wasn't fair that they should pay a +shilling a week each when the butcher--who was the eldest and earned +the best wages--paid nothing. Provided he paid, they would pay; but if +he didn't pay anything, neither would they. On Christmas Eve they all +happened to come to the house at the same time; each denounced the +others, and after nearly coming to blows they all went away raging and +cursing and had not been near the place since. + +As soon as she decided to sell the things, Mary went to Didlum's +second-hand furniture store, and the manager said he would ask Mr +Didlum to call and see the table and other articles. She waited +anxiously all the morning, but he did not appear, so she went once more +to the shop to remind him. When he did come at last he was very +contemptuous of the table and of everything else she offered to sell. +Five shillings was the very most he could think of giving for the +table, and even then he doubted whether he would ever get his money +back. Eventually he gave her thirty shillings for the table, the +overmantel, the easy chair, three other chairs and the two best +pictures--one a large steel engraving of 'The Good Samaritan' and the +other 'Christ Blessing Little Children'. + +He paid the money at once; half an hour afterwards the van came to take +the things away, and when they were gone, Mary sank down on the +hearthrug in the wrecked room and sobbed as if her heart would break. + +This was the first of several similar transactions. Slowly, piece by +piece, in order to buy food and to pay the rent, the furniture was +sold. Every time Didlum came he affected to be doing them a very great +favour by buying the things at all. Almost an act of charity. He did +not want them. Business was so bad: it might be years before he could +sell them again, and so on. Once or twice he asked Mary if she did not +want to sell the clock--the one that her late husband had made for his +mother, but Mary shrank from the thought of selling this, until at last +there was nothing else left that Didlum would buy, and one week, when +Mary was too ill to do any needlework--it had to go. He gave them ten +shillings for it. + +Mary had expected the old woman to be heartbroken at having to part +with this clock, but she was surprised to see her almost indifferent. +The truth was, that lately both the old people seemed stunned, and +incapable of taking an intelligent interest in what was happening +around them, and Mary had to attend to everything. + +From time to time nearly all their other possessions--things of +inferior value that Didlum would not look at, she carried out and sold +at small second-hand shops in back streets or pledged at the +pawn-broker's. The feather pillows, sheets, and blankets: bits of +carpet or oilcloth, and as much of their clothing as was saleable or +pawnable. They felt the loss of the bedclothes more than anything +else, for although all the clothes they wore during the day, and all +the old clothes and dresses in the house, and even an old +tablecloth, were put on the beds at night, they did not compensate for +the blankets, and they were often unable to sleep on account of the +intense cold. + +A lady district visitor who called occasionally sometimes gave Mary an +order for a hundredweight of coal or a shillingsworth of groceries, or +a ticket for a quart of soup, which Elsie fetched in the evening from +the Soup Kitchen. But this was not very often, because, as the lady +said, there were so many cases similar to theirs that it was impossible +to do more than a very little for any one of them. + +Sometimes Mary became so weak and exhausted through overwork, worry, +and lack of proper food that she broke down altogether for the time +being, and positively could not do any work at all. Then she used to +lie down on the bed in her room and cry. + +Whenever she became like this, Elsie and Charley used to do the +housework when they came home from school, and make tea and toast for +her, and bring it to the bedside on a chair so that she could eat lying +down. When there was no margarine or dripping to put on the toast, +they made it very thin and crisp and pretended it was biscuit. + +The children rather enjoyed these times; the quiet and leisure was so +different from other days when their mother was so busy she had no time +to speak to them. + +They would sit on the side of the bed, the old grandmother in her chair +opposite with the cat beside her listening to the conversation and +purring or mewing whenever they stroked it or spoke to it. They talked +principally of the future. Elsie said she was going to be a teacher +and earn a lot of money to bring home to her mother to buy things with. +Charley was thinking of opening a grocer's shop and having a horse and +cart. When one has a grocer's shop, there is always plenty to eat; +even if you have no money, you can take as much as you like out of your +shop--good stuff, too, tins of salmon, jam, sardines, eggs, cakes, +biscuits and all those sorts of things--and one was almost certain to +have some money every day, because it wasn't likely that a whole day +would go by without someone or other coming into the shop to buy +something. When delivering the groceries with the horse and cart, he +would give rides to all the boys he knew, and in the summertime, after +the work was done and the shop shut up, Mother and Elsie and Granny +could also come for long rides into the country. + +The old grandmother--who had latterly become quite childish--used to +sit and listen to all this talk with a superior air. Sometimes she +argued with the children about their plans, and ridiculed them. She +used to say with a chuckle that she had heard people talk like that +before--lots of times--but it never came to nothing in the end. + +One week about the middle of February, when they were in very sore +straits indeed, old Jack applied to the secretary of the Organized +Benevolence Society for assistance. It was about eleven o'clock in the +morning when he turned the corner of the street where the office of the +society was situated and saw a crowd of about thirty men waiting for +the doors to be opened in order to apply for soup tickets. Some of +these men were of the tramp or the drunken loafer class; some were old, +broken-down workmen like himself, and others were labourers wearing +corduroy or moleskin trousers with straps round their legs under their +knees. + +Linden waited at a distance until all these were gone before he went +in. The secretary received him sympathetically and gave him a big form +to fill up, but as Linden's eyes were so bad and his hand so unsteady +the secretary very obligingly wrote in the answers himself, and +informed him that he would inquire into the case and lay his +application before the committee at the next meeting, which was to be +held on the following Thursday--it was then Monday. + +Linden explained to him that they were actually starving. He had been +out of work for sixteen weeks, and during all that time they had lived +for the most part on the earnings of his daughter-in-law, but she had +not done anything for nearly a fortnight now, because the firm she +worked for had not had any work for her to do. There was no food in +the house and the children were crying for something to eat. All last +week they had been going to school hungry, for they had had nothing but +dry bread and tea every day: but this week--as far as he could +see--they would not get even that. After some further talk the +secretary gave him two soup tickets and an order for a loaf of bread, +and repeated his promise to inquire into the case and bring it before +the committee. + +As Jack was returning home he passed the Soup Kitchen, where he saw the +same lot of men who had been to the office of the Organized Benevolence +Society for the soup tickets. They were waiting in a long line to be +admitted. The premises being so small, the proprietor served them in +batches of ten at a time. + +On Wednesday the secretary called at the house, and on Friday Jack +received a letter from him to the effect that the case had been duly +considered by the committee, who had come to the conclusion that as it +was a 'chronic' case they were unable to deal with it, and advised him +to apply to the Board of Guardians. This was what Linden had hitherto +shrunk from doing, but the situation was desperate. They owed five +weeks' rent, and to crown their misfortune his eyesight had become so +bad that even if there had been any prospect of obtaining work it was +very doubtful if he could have managed to do it. So Linden, feeling +utterly crushed and degraded, swallowed all that remained of his pride +and went like a beaten dog to see the relieving officer, who took him +before the Board, who did not think it a suitable case for out-relief, +and after some preliminaries it was arranged that Linden and his wife +were to go into the workhouse, and Mary was to be allowed three +shillings a week to help her to support herself and the two children. +As for Linden's sons, the Guardians intimated their Intention of +compelling them to contribute towards the cost of their parents' +maintenance. + +Mary accompanied the old people to the gates of their future +dwelling-place, and when she returned home she found there a letter +addressed to J. Linden. It was from the house agent and contained a +notice to leave the house before the end of the ensuing week. Nothing +was said about the rent that was due. Perhaps Mr Sweater thought that +as he had already received nearly six hundred pounds in rent from +Linden he could afford to be generous about the five weeks that were +still owing--or perhaps he thought there was no possibility of getting +the money. However that may have been, there was no reference to it in +the letter--it was simply a notice to clear out, addressed to Linden, +but meant for Mary. + +It was about half past three o'clock in the afternoon when she returned +home and found this letter on the floor in the front passage. She was +faint with fatigue and hunger, for she had had nothing but a cup of tea +and a slice of bread that day, and her fare had not been much better +for many weeks past. The children were at school, and the house--now +almost destitute of furniture and without carpets or oilcloth on the +floors--was deserted and cold and silent as a tomb. On the kitchen +table were a few cracked cups and saucers, a broken knife, some lead +teaspoons, a part of a loaf, a small basin containing some dripping and +a brown earthenware teapot with a broken spout. Near the table were two +broken kitchen chairs, one with the top cross-piece gone from the back, +and the other with no back to the seat at all. The bareness of the +walls was relieved only by a almanac and some paper pictures +which the children had tacked upon them, and by the side of the +fireplace was the empty wicker chair where the old woman used to sit. +There was no fire in the grate, and the cold hearth was untidy with an +accumulation of ashes, for during the trouble of these last few days +she had not had time or heart to do any housework. The floor was +unswept and littered with scraps of paper and dust: in one corner was a +heap of twigs and small branches of trees that Charley had found +somewhere and brought home for the fire. + +The same disorder prevailed all through the house: all the doors were +open, and from where she stood in the kitchen she could see the bed she +shared with Elsie, with its heterogeneous heap of coverings. The +sitting-room contained nothing but a collection of odds and ends of +rubbish which belonged to Charley--his 'things' as he called them--bits +of wood, string and rope; one wheel of a perambulator, a top, an iron +hoop and so on. Through the other door was visible the dilapidated +bedstead that had been used by the old people, with a similar lot of +bedclothes to those on her own bed, and the torn, ragged covering of +the mattress through the side of which the flock was protruding and +falling in particles on to the floor. + +As she stood there with the letter in her hand--faint and weary in the +midst of all this desolation, it seemed to her as if the whole world +were falling to pieces and crumbling away all around her. + + + +Chapter 34 + +The Beginning of the End + + +During the months of January and February, Owen, Crass, Slyme and +Sawkins continued to work at irregular intervals for Rushton & Co., +although--even when there was anything to do--they now put in only six +hours a day, commencing in the morning and leaving off at four, with an +hour's interval for dinner between twelve and one. They finished the +'plant' and painted the front of Rushton's shop. When all this was +completed, as no other work came in, they all had to 'stand off' with +the exception of Sawkins, who was kept on because he was cheap and able +to do all sorts of odd jobs, such as unstopping drains, repairing leaky +roofs, rough painting or lime-washing, and he was also useful as a +labourer for the plumbers, of whom there were now three employed at +Rushton's, the severe weather which had come in with January having +made a lot of work in that trade. With the exception of this one +branch, practically all work was at a standstill. + +During this time Rushton & Co. had had several 'boxing-up' jobs to do, +and Crass always did the polishing of the coffins on these occasions, +besides assisting to take the 'box' home when finished and to 'lift in' +the corpse, and afterwards he always acted as one of the bearers at the +funerals. For an ordinary class funeral he usually put in about three +hours for the polishing; that came to one and nine. Taking home the +coffin and lifting in the corpse, one shilling--usually there were two +men to do this besides Hunter, who always accompanied them to +superintend the work--attending the funeral and acting as bearer, four +shillings: so that altogether Crass made six shillings and ninepence +out of each funeral, and sometimes a little more. For instance, when +there was an unusually good-class corpse they had a double coffin and +then of course there were two 'lifts in', for the shell was taken home +first and the outer coffin perhaps a day or two later: this made +another shilling. No matter how expensive the funeral was, the bearers +never got any more money. Sometimes the carpenter and Crass were able +to charge an hour or two more on the making and polishing of a coffin +for a good job, but that was all. Sometimes, when there was a very +cheap job, they were paid only three shillings for attending as +bearers, but this was not often: as a rule they got the same amount +whether it was a cheap funeral or an expensive one. Slyme earned only +five shillings out of each funeral, and Owen only one and six--for +writing the coffin plate. + +Sometimes there were three or four funerals in a week, and then Crass +did very well indeed. He still had the two young men lodgers at his +house, and although one of them was out of work he was still able to +pay his way because he had some money in the bank. + +One of the funeral jobs led to a terrible row between Crass and +Sawkins. The corpse was that of a well-to-do woman who had been ill +for a long time with cancer of the stomach, and after the funeral +Rushton & Co. had to clean and repaint and paper the room she had +occupied during her illness. Although cancer is not supposed to be an +infectious disease, they had orders to take all the bedding away and +have it burnt. Sawkins was instructed to take a truck to the house and +get the bedding and take it to the town Refuse Destructor to be +destroyed. There were two feather beds, a bolster and two pillows: +they were such good things that Sawkins secretly resolved that instead +of taking them to the Destructor he would take them to a second-hand +dealer and sell them. + +As he was coming away from the house with the things he met Hunter, who +told him that he wanted him for some other work; so he was to take the +truck to the yard and leave it there for the present; he could take the +bedding to the Destructor later on in the day. Sawkins did as Hunter +ordered, and in the meantime Crass, who happened to be working at the +yard painting some venetian blinds, saw the things on the truck, and, +hearing what was to be done with them, he also thought it was a pity +that such good things should be destroyed: so when Sawkins came in the +afternoon to take them away Crass told him he need not trouble; 'I'm +goin' to 'ave that lot, he said; 'they're too good to chuck away; +there's nothing wrong with 'em.' + +This did not suit Sawkins at all. He said he had been told to take +them to the Destructor, and he was going to do so. He was dragging the +cart out of the yard when Crass rushed up and lifted the bundle off and +carried it into the paint-shop. Sawkins ran after him and they began +to curse and swear at each other; Crass accusing Sawkins of intending +to take the things to the marine stores and sell them. Sawkins seized +hold of the bundle with the object of replacing it on the cart, but +Crass got hold of it as well and they had a tussle for it--a kind of +tug of war--reeling and struggling all over the shop. cursing and +swearing horribly all the time. Finally, Sawkins--being the better man +of the two--succeeded in wrenching the bundle away and put it on the +cart again, and then Crass hurriedly put on his coat and said he was +going to the office to ask Mr Rushton if he might have the things. +Upon hearing this, Sawkins became so infuriated that he lifted the +bundle off the cart and, throwing it upon the muddy ground, right into +a pool of dirty water, trampled it underfoot; and then, taking out his +clasp knife, began savagely hacking and ripping the ticking so that the +feathers all came falling out. In a few minutes he had damaged the +things beyond hope of repair, while Crass stood by, white and +trembling, watching the proceedings but lacking the courage to +interfere. + +'Now go to the office and ask Rushton for 'em, if you like!' shouted +Sawkins. 'You can 'ave 'em now, if you want 'em.' + +Crass made no answer and, after a moment's hesitation, went back to his +work, and Sawkins piled the things on the cart once more and took them +away to the Destructor. He would not be able to sell them now, but at +any rate he had stopped that dirty swine Crass from getting them. + +When Crass went back to the paint-shop he found there one of the +pillows which had fallen out of the bundle during the struggle. He +took it home with him that evening and slept upon it. It was a fine +pillow, much fuller and softer and more cosy than the one he had been +accustomed to. + +A few days afterwards when he was working at the room where the woman +died, they gave him some other things that had belonged to her to do +away with, and amongst them was a kind of wrap of grey knitted wool. +Crass kept this for himself: it was just the thing to wrap round one's +neck when going to work on a cold morning, and he used it for that +purpose all through the winter. In addition to the funerals, there was +a little other work: sometimes a room or two to be painted and papered +and ceilings whitened, and once they had the outside of two small +cottages to paint--doors and windows--two coats. All four of them +worked at this job and it was finished in two days. And so they went +on. + +Some weeks Crass earned a pound or eighteen shillings; sometimes a +little more, generally less and occasionally nothing at all. + +There was a lot of jealousy and ill-feeling amongst them about the +work. Slyme and Crass were both aggrieved about Sawkins whenever they +were idle, especially if the latter were painting or whitewashing, and +their indignation was shared by all the others who were 'off'. Harlow +swore horribly about it, and they all agreed that it was disgraceful +that a bloody labourer should be employed doing what ought to be +skilled work for fivepence an hour, while properly qualified men were +'walking about'. These other men were also incensed against Slyme and +Crass because the latter were given the preference whenever there was a +little job to do, and it was darkly insinuated that in order to secure +this preference these two were working for sixpence an hour. There was +no love lost between Crass and Slyme either: Crass was furious whenever +it happened that Slyme had a few hours' work to do if he himself were +idle, and if ever Crass was working while Slyme was 'standing still' +the latter went about amongst the other unemployed men saying ugly +things about Crass, whom he accused of being a 'crawler'. Owen also +came in for his share of abuse and blame: most of them said that a man +like him should stick out for higher wages whether employed on special +work or not, and then he would not get any preference. But all the +same, whatever they said about each other behind each other's backs, +they were all most friendly to each other when they met face to face. + +Once or twice Owen did some work--such as graining a door or writing a +sign--for one or other of his fellow workmen who had managed to secure +a little job 'on his own', but putting it all together, the +coffin-plates and other work at Rushton's and all, his earnings had not +averaged ten shillings a week for the last six weeks. Often they had +no coal and sometimes not even a penny to put into the gas meter, and +then, having nothing left good enough to pawn, he sometimes obtained a +few pence by selling some of his books to second-hand book dealers. +However, bad as their condition was, Owen knew that they were better +off than the majority of the others, for whenever he went out he was +certain to meet numbers of men whom he had worked with at different +times, who said--some of them--that they had been idle for ten, twelve, +fifteen and in some cases for twenty weeks without having earned a +shilling. + +Owen used to wonder how they managed to continue to exist. Most of +them were wearing other people's cast-off clothes, hats, and boots, +which had in some instances been given to their wives by 'visiting +ladies', or by the people at whose houses their wives went to work, +charing. As for food, most of them lived on such credit as they could +get, and on the scraps of broken victuals and meat that their wives +brought home from the places they worked at. Some of them had grown-up +sons and daughters who still lived with them and whose earnings kept +their homes together, and the wives of some of them eked out a +miserable existence by letting lodgings. + +The week before old Linden went into the workhouse Owen earned nothing, +and to make matters worse the grocer from whom they usually bought +their things suddenly refused to let them have any more credit. Owen +went to see him, and the man said he was very sorry, but he could not +let them have anything more without the money; he did not mind waiting +a few weeks for what was already owing, but he could not let the amount +get any higher; his books were full of bad debts already. In +conclusion, he said that he hoped Owen would not do as so many others +had done and take his ready money elsewhere. People came and got +credit from him when they were hard up, and afterwards spent their +ready money at the Monopole Company's stores on the other side of the +street, because their goods were a trifle cheaper, and it was not fair. +Owen admitted that it was not fair, but reminded him that they always +bought their things at his shop. The grocer, however, was inexorable; +he repeated several times that his books were full of bad debts and his +own creditors were pressing him. During their conversation the +shopkeeper's eyes wandered continually to the big store on the other +side of the street; the huge, gilded letters of the name 'Monopole +Stores' seemed to have an irresistible attraction for him. Once he +interrupted himself in the middle of a sentence to point out to Owen a +little girl who was just coming out of the Stores with a small parcel +in her hand. + +'Her father owes me nearly thirty shillings,' he said, 'but they spend +their ready money there.' + +The front of the grocer's shop badly needed repainting, and the name on +the fascia, 'A. Smallman', was so faded as to be almost indecipherable. +It had been Owen's intention to offer to do this work--the cost to go +against his account--but the man appeared to be so harassed that Owen +refrained from making the suggestion. + +They still had credit at the baker's, but they did not take much bread: +when one has had scarcely anything else but bread to eat for nearly a +month one finds it difficult to eat at all. That same day, when he +returned home after his interview with the grocer, they had a loaf of +beautiful fresh bread, but none of them could eat it, although they +were hungry: it seemed to stick in their throats, and they could not +swallow it even with the help of a drink of tea. But they drank the +tea, which was the one thing that enabled them to go on living. + +The next week Owen earned eight shillings altogether: a few hours he +put in assisting Crass to wash off and whiten a ceiling and paint a +room, and there was one coffin-plate. He wrote the latter at home, and +while he was doing it he heard Frankie--who was out in the scullery +with Nora--say to her: + +'Mother, how many more days to you think we'll have to have only dry +bread and tea?' + +Owen's heart seemed to stop as he heard the child's question and +listened for Nora's answer, but the question was not to be answered at +all just then, for at that moment they heard someone running up the +stairs and presently the door was unceremoniously thrown open and +Charley Linden rushed into the house, out of breath, hatless, and +crying piteously. His clothes were old and ragged; they had been +patched at the knees and elbows, but the patches were tearing away from +the rotting fabric into which they had been sewn. He had on a pair of +black stockings full of holes through which the skin was showing. The +soles of his boots were worn through at one side right to the uppers, +and as he walked the sides of his bare heels came into contact with the +floor, the front part of the sole of one boot was separated from the +upper, and his bare toes, red with cold and covered with mud, protruded +through the gap. Some sharp substance--a nail or a piece of glass or +flint--had evidently lacerated his right foot, for blood was oozing +from the broken heel of his boot on to the floor. + +They were unable to make much sense of the confused story he told them +through his sobs as soon as he was able to speak. All that was clear +was that there was something very serious the matter at home: he +thought his mother must be either dying or dead, because she did not +speak or move or open her eyes, and 'please, please, please will you +come home with me and see her?' + + + +While Nora was getting ready to go with the boy, Owen made him sit on a +chair, and having removed the boot from the foot that was bleeding, +washed the cut with some warm water and bandaged it with a piece of +clean rag, and then they tried to persuade him to stay there with +Frankie while Nora went to see his mother, but the boy would not hear +of it. So Frankie went with them instead. Owen could not go because +he had to finish the coffin-plate, which was only just commenced. + +It will be remembered that we left Mary Linden alone in the house after +she returned from seeing the old people away. When the children came +home from school, about half an hour afterwards, they found her sitting +in one of the chairs with her head resting on her arms on the table, +unconscious. They were terrified, because they could not awaken her +and began to cry, but presently Charley thought of Frankie's mother +and, telling his sister to stay there while he was gone, he started off +at a run for Owen's house, leaving the front door wide open after him. + +When Nora and the two boys reached the house they found there two other +women neighbours, who had heard Elsie crying and had come to see what +was wrong. Mary had recovered from her faint and was lying down on the +bed. Nora stayed with her for some time after the other women went +away. She lit the fire and gave the children their tea--there was +still some coal and food left of what had been bought with the three +shillings obtained from the Board of Guardians--and afterwards she +tidied the house. + +Mary said that she did not know exactly what she would have to do in +the future. If she could get a room somewhere for two or three +shillings a week, her allowance from the Guardians would pay the rent, +and she would be able to earn enough for herself and the children to +live on. + +This was the substance of the story that Nora told Owen when she +returned home. He had finished writing the coffin-plate, and as it was +now nearly dry he put on his coat and took it down to the carpenter's +shop at the yard. + +On his way back he met Easton, who had been hanging about in the vain +hope of seeing Hunter and finding out if there was any chance of a job. +As they walked along together, Easton confided to Owen that he had +earned scarcely anything since he had been stood off at Rushton's, and +what he had earned had gone, as usual, to pay the rent. Slyme had left +them some time ago. Ruth did not seem able to get on with him; she had +been in a funny sort of temper altogether, but since he had gone she +had had a little work at a boarding-house on the Grand Parade. But +things had been going from bad to worse. They had not been able to keep +up the payments for the furniture they had hired, so the things had +been seized and carted off. They had even stripped the oilcloth from +the floor. Easton remarked he was sorry he had not tacked the bloody +stuff down in such a manner that they would not have been able to take +it up without destroying it. He had been to see Didlum, who said he +didn't want to be hard on them, and that he would keep the things +together for three months, and if Easton had paid up arrears by that +time he could have them back again, but there was, in Easton's opinion, +very little chance of that. + +Owen listened with contempt and anger. Here was a man who grumbled at +the present state of things, yet took no trouble to think for himself +and try to alter them, and who at the first chance would vote for the +perpetuation of the System which produced his misery. + +'Have you heard that old Jack Linden and his wife went to the workhouse +today,' he said. + +'No,' replied Easton, indifferently. 'It's only what I expected.' + +Owen then suggested it would not be a bad plan for Easton to let his +front room, now that it was empty, to Mrs Linden, who would be sure to +pay her rent, which would help Easton to pay his. Easton agreed and +said he would mention it to Ruth, and a few minutes later they parted. + +The next morning Nora found Ruth talking to Mary Linden about the room +and as the Eastons lived only about five minutes' walk away, they all +three went round there in order that Mary might see the room. The +appearance of the house from outside was unaltered: the white lace +curtains still draped the windows of the front room; and in the centre +of the bay was what appeared to be a small round table covered with a +red cloth, and upon it a geranium in a flowerpot standing in a saucer +with a frill of tissue paper round it. These things and the +curtains, which fell close together, made it impossible for anyone to +see that the room was, otherwise, unfurnished. The 'table' consisted +of an empty wooden box--procured from the grocer's--stood on end, with +the lid of the scullery copper placed upside down upon it for a top and +covered with an old piece of red cloth. The purpose of this was to +prevent the neighbours from thinking that they were hard up; although +they knew that nearly all those same neighbours were in more or less +similar straits. + +It was not a very large room, considering that it would have to serve +all purposes for herself and the two children, but Mrs Linden knew that +it was not likely that she would be able to get one as good elsewhere +for the same price, so she agreed to take it from the following Monday +at two shillings a week. + +As the distance was so short they were able to carry most of the +smaller things to their new home during the next few days, and on the +Monday evening, when it was dark. Owen and Easton brought the +remainder on a truck they borrowed for the purpose from Hunter. + +During the last weeks of February the severity of the weather +increased. There was a heavy fall of snow on the 20th followed by a +hard frost which lasted several days. + +About ten o'clock one night a policeman found a man lying unconscious +in the middle of a lonely road. At first he thought the man was drunk, +and after dragging him on to the footpath out of the way of passing +vehicles he went for the stretcher. They took the man to the station +and put him into a cell, which was already occupied by a man who had +been caught in the act of stealing a swede turnip from a barn. When the +police surgeon came he pronounced the supposed drunken man to be dying +from bronchitis and want of food; and he further said that there was +nothing to indicate that the man was addicted to drink. When the +inquest was held a few days afterwards, the coroner remarked that it +was the third case of death from destitution that had occurred in the +town within six weeks. + +The evidence showed that the man was a plasterer who had walked from +London with the hope of finding work somewhere in the country. He had +no money in his possession when he was found by the policeman; all that +his pockets contained being several pawn-tickets and a letter from his +wife, which was not found until after he died, because it was in an +inner pocket of his waistcoat. A few days before this inquest was +held, the man who had been arrested for stealing the turnip had been +taken before the magistrates. The poor wretch said he did it because +he was starving, but Aldermen Sweater and Grinder, after telling him +that starvation was no excuse for dishonesty, sentenced him to pay a +fine of seven shillings and costs, or go to prison for seven days with +hard labour. As the convict had neither money nor friends, he had to +go to jail, where he was, after all, better off than most of those who +were still outside because they lacked either the courage or the +opportunity to steal something to relieve their sufferings. + +As time went on the long-continued privation began to tell upon Owen +and his family. He had a severe cough: his eyes became deeply sunken +and of remarkable brilliancy, and his thin face was always either +deathly pale or dyed with a crimson flush. + +Frankie also began to show the effects of being obliged to go so often +without his porridge and milk; he became very pale and thin and his +long hair came out in handfuls when his mother combed or brushed it. +This was a great trouble to the boy, who, since hearing the story of +Samson read out of the Bible at school, had ceased from asking to have +his hair cut short, lest he should lose his strength in consequence. He +used to test himself by going through a certain exercise he had himself +invented, with a flat iron, and he was always much relieved when he +found that, notwithstanding the loss of the porridge, he was still able +to lift the iron the proper number of times. But after a while, as he +found that it became increasingly difficult to go through the exercise, +he gave it up altogether, secretly resolving to wait until 'Dad' had +more work to do, so that he could have the porridge and milk again. He +was sorry to have to discontinue the exercise, but he said nothing +about it to his father or mother because he did not want to 'worry' +them... + +Sometimes Nora managed to get a small job of needlework. On one +occasion a woman with a small son brought a parcel of garments +belonging to herself or her husband, an old ulster, several coats, and +so on--things that although they were too old-fashioned or shabby to +wear, yet might look all right if turned and made up for the boy. + +Nora undertook to do this, and after working several hours every day +for a week she earned four shillings: and even then the woman thought +it was so dear that she did not bring any more. + +Another time Mrs Easton got her some work at a boarding-house where she +herself was employed. The servant was laid up, and they wanted some +help for a few days. The pay was to be two shillings a day, and +dinner. Owen did not want her to go because he feared she was not +strong enough to do the work, but he gave way at last and Nora went. +She had to do the bedrooms, and on the evening of the second day, as a +result of the constant running up and down the stairs carrying heavy +cans and pails of water, she was in such intense pain that she was +scarcely able to walk home, and for several days afterwards had to lie +in bed through a recurrence of her old illness, which caused her to +suffer untold agony whenever she tried to stand. + +Owen was alternately dejected and maddened by the knowledge of his own +helplessness: when he was not doing anything for Rushton he went about +the town trying to find some other work, but usually with scant +success. He did some samples of showcard and window tickets and +endeavoured to get some orders by canvassing the shops in the town, but +this was also a failure, for these people generally had a ticket-writer +to whom they usually gave their work. He did get a few trifling +orders, but they were scarcely worth doing at the price he got for +them. He used to feel like a criminal when he went into the shops to +ask them for the work, because he realized fully that, in effect, he +was saying to them: 'Take your work away from the other man, and employ +me.' He was so conscious of this that it gave him a shamefaced manner, +which, coupled as it was with his shabby clothing, did not create a +very favourable impression upon those he addressed, who usually treated +him with about as much courtesy as they would have extended to any +other sort of beggar. Generally, after a day's canvassing, he returned +home unsuccessful and faint with hunger and fatigue. + +Once, when there was a bitterly cold east wind blowing, he was out on +one of these canvassing expeditions and contracted a severe cold: his +chest became so bad that he found it almost impossible to speak, +because the effort to do so often brought on a violent fit of coughing. +It was during this time that a firm of drapers, for whom he had done +some showcards, sent him an order for one they wanted in a hurry, it +had to be delivered the next morning, so he stayed up by himself till +nearly midnight to do it. As he worked, he felt a strange sensation in +his chest: it was not exactly a pain, and he would have found it +difficult to describe it in words--it was just a sensation. He did not +attach much importance to it, thinking it an effect of the cold he had +taken, but whatever it was he could not help feeling conscious of it +all the time. + +Frankie had been put to bed that evening at the customary hour, but did +not seem to be sleeping as well as usual. Owen could hear him twisting +and turning about and uttering little cries in his sleep. + +He left his work several times to go into the boy's room and cover him +with the bedclothes which his restless movements had disordered. As +the time wore on, the child became more tranquil, and about eleven +o'clock, when Owen went in to look at him, he found him in a deep +sleep, lying on his side with his head thrown back on the pillow, +breathing so softly through his slightly parted lips that the sound was +almost imperceptible. The fair hair that clustered round his forehead +was damp with perspiration, and he was so still and pale and silent +that one might have thought he was sleeping the sleep that knows no +awakening. + +About an hour later, when he had finished writing the showcard, Owen +went out into the scullery to wash his hands before going to bed: and +whilst he was drying them on the towel, the strange sensation he had +been conscious of all the evening became more intense, and a few +seconds afterwards he was terrified to find his mouth suddenly filled +with blood. + +For what seemed an eternity he fought for breath against the +suffocating torrent, and when at length it stopped, he sank trembling +into a chair by the side of the table, holding the towel to his mouth +and scarcely daring to breathe, whilst a cold sweat streamed from every +pore and gathered in large drops upon his forehead. + +Through the deathlike silence of the night there came from time to time +the chimes of the clock of a distant church, but he continued to sit +there motionless, taking no heed of the passing hours, and possessed +with an awful terror. + +So this was the beginning of the end! And afterwards the other two +would be left by themselves at the mercy of the world. In a few years' +time the boy would be like Bert White, in the clutches of some +psalm-singing devil like Hunter or Rushton, who would use him as if he +were a beast of burden. He imagined he could see him now as he would +be then: worked, driven, and bullied, carrying loads, dragging carts, +and running here and there, trying his best to satisfy the brutal +tyrants, whose only thought would be to get profit out of him for +themselves. If he lived, it would be to grow up with his body deformed +and dwarfed by unnatural labour and with his mind stultified, degraded +and brutalized by ignorance and poverty. As this vision of the child's +future rose before him, Owen resolved that it should never be! He +would not leave them alone and defenceless in the midst of the +'Christian' wolves who were waiting to rend them as soon as he was +gone. If he could not give them happiness, he could at least put them +out of the reach of further suffering. If he could not stay with them, +they would have to come with him. It would be kinder and more merciful. + + + +Chapter 35 + +Facing the 'Problem' + + +Nearly every other firm in the town was in much the same plight as +Rushton & Co.; none of them had anything to speak of to do, and the +workmen no longer troubled to go to the different shops asking for a +job. They knew it was of no use. Most of them just walked about +aimlessly or stood talking in groups in the streets, principally in the +neighbourhood of the Wage Slave Market near the fountain on the Grand +Parade. They congregated here in such numbers that one or two +residents wrote to the local papers complaining of the 'nuisance', and +pointing out that it was calculated to drive the 'better-class' +visitors out of the town. After this two or three extra policemen were +put on duty near the fountain with instructions to 'move on' any groups +of unemployed that formed. They could not stop them from coming there, +but they prevented them standing about. + +The processions of unemployed continued every day, and the money they +begged from the public was divided equally amongst those who took part. +Sometimes it amounted to one and sixpence each, sometimes it was a +little more and sometimes a little less. These men presented a +terrible spectacle as they slunk through the dreary streets, through +the rain or the snow, with the slush soaking into their broken boots, +and, worse still, with the bitterly cold east wind penetrating their +rotten clothing and freezing their famished bodies. + +The majority of the skilled workers still held aloof from these +processions, although their haggard faces bore involuntary testimony to +their sufferings. Although privation reigned supreme in their desolate +homes, where there was often neither food nor light nor fire, they were +too 'proud' to parade their misery before each other or the world. +They secretly sold or pawned their clothing and their furniture and +lived in semi-starvation on the proceeds, and on credit, but they would +not beg. Many of them even echoed the sentiments of those who had +written to the papers, and with a strange lack of class-sympathy blamed +those who took part in the processions. They said it was that sort of +thing that drove the 'better class' away, injured the town, and caused +all the poverty and unemployment. However, some of them accepted +charity in other ways; district visitors distributed tickets for coal +and groceries. Not that that sort of thing made much difference; there +was usually a great deal of fuss and advice, many quotations of +Scripture, and very little groceries. And even what there was +generally went to the least-deserving people, because the only way to +obtain any of this sort of 'charity' is by hypocritically pretending to +be religious: and the greater the hypocrite, the greater the quantity +of coal and groceries. These 'charitable' people went into the +wretched homes of the poor and--in effect--said: 'Abandon every +particle of self-respect: cringe and fawn: come to church: bow down and +grovel to us, and in return we'll give you a ticket that you can take +to a certain shop and exchange for a shillingsworth of groceries. And, +if you're very servile and humble we may give you another one next +week.' + +They never gave the 'case' the money. The ticket system serves three +purposes. It prevents the 'case' abusing the 'charity' by spending the +money on drink. It advertises the benevolence of the donors: and it +enables the grocer--who is usually a member of the church--to get rid +of any stale or damaged stock he may have on hand. + +When these visiting ladies' went into a workman's house and found it +clean and decently furnished, and the children clean and tidy, they +came to the conclusion that those people were not suitable 'cases' for +assistance. Perhaps the children had had next to nothing to eat, and +would have been in rags if the mother had not worked like a slave +washing and mending their clothes. But these were not the sort of +cases that the visiting ladies assisted; they only gave to those who +were in a state of absolute squalor and destitution, and then only on +condition that they whined and grovelled. + +In addition to this district visitor business, the well-to-do +inhabitants and the local authorities attempted--or rather, +pretended--to grapple with the poverty 'problem' in many other ways, +and the columns of the local papers were filled with letters from all +sorts of cranks who suggested various remedies. One individual, whose +income was derived from brewery shares, attributed the prevailing +distress to the drunken and improvident habits of the lower orders. +Another suggested that it was a Divine protest against the growth of +Ritualism and what he called 'fleshly religion', and suggested a day of +humiliation and prayer. A great number of well-fed persons thought +this such an excellent proposition that they proceeded to put it into +practice. They prayed, whilst the unemployed and the little children +fasted. + +If one had not been oppressed by the tragedy of Want and Misery, one +might have laughed at the farcical, imbecile measures that were taken +to relieve it. Several churches held what they called 'Rummage' or +'jumble' sales. They sent out circulars something like this: + + JUMBLE SALE + in aid of the Unemployed. + + If you have any articles of any description which are of no + further use to you, we should be grateful for them, and if you + will kindly fill in annexed form and post it to us, we will send + and collect them. + +On the day of the sale the parish room was transformed into a kind of +Marine Stores, filled with all manner of rubbish, with the parson and +the visiting ladies grinning in the midst. The things were sold for +next to nothing to such as cared to buy them, and the local +rag-and-bone man reaped a fine harvest. The proceeds of these sales +were distributed in 'charity' and it was usually a case of much cry and +little wool. + +There was a religious organization, called 'The Mugsborough Skull and +Crossbones Boys', which existed for the purpose of perpetuating the +great religious festival of Guy Fawkes. This association also came to +the aid of the unemployed and organized a Grand Fancy Dress Carnival +and Torchlight Procession. When this took place, although there was a +slight sprinkling of individuals dressed in tawdry costumes as +cavaliers of the time of Charles I, and a few more as highwaymen or +footpads, the majority of the processionists were boys in women's +clothes, or wearing sacks with holes cut in them for their heads and +arms, and with their faces smeared with soot. There were also a number +of men carrying frying-pans in which they burnt red and blue fire. The +procession--or rather, mob--was headed by a band, and the band was +headed by two men, arm in arm, one very tall, dressed to represent +Satan, in red tights, with horns on his head, and smoking a large +cigar, and the other attired in the no less picturesque costume of a +bishop of the Established Church. + +This crew paraded the town, howling and dancing, carrying flaring +torches, burning the blue and red fire, and some of them singing silly +or obscene songs; whilst the collectors ran about with the boxes +begging for money from people who were in most cases nearly as +poverty-stricken as the unemployed they were asked to assist. The +money thus obtained was afterwards handed over to the Secretary of the +Organized Benevolence Society, Mr Sawney Grinder. + +Then there was the Soup Kitchen, which was really an inferior +eating-house in a mean street. The man who ran this was a relative of +the secretary of the OBS. He cadged all the ingredients for the soup +from different tradespeople: bones and scraps of meat from butchers: +pea meal and split peas from provision dealers: vegetables from +greengrocers: stale bread from bakers, and so on. Well-intentioned, +charitable old women with more money than sense sent him donations in +cash, and he sold the soup for a penny a basin--or a penny a quart to +those who brought jugs. + +He had a large number of shilling books printed, each containing +thirteen penny tickets. The Organized Benevolence Society bought a lot +of these books and resold them to benevolent persons, or gave them away +to 'deserving cases'. It was this connection with the OBS that gave +the Soup Kitchen a semi-official character in the estimation of the +public, and furnished the proprietor with the excuse for cadging the +materials and money donations. + +In the case of the Soup Kitchen, as with the unemployed processions, +most of those who benefited were unskilled labourers or derelicts: with +but few exceptions the unemployed artisans--although their need was +just as great as that of the others--avoided the place as if it were +infected with the plague. They were afraid even to pass through the +street where it was situated lest anyone seeing them coming from that +direction should think they had been there. But all the same, some of +them allowed their children to go there by stealth, by night, to buy +some of this charity-tainted food. + +Another brilliant scheme, practical and statesmanlike, so different +from the wild projects of demented Socialists, was started by the Rev. +Mr Bosher, a popular preacher, the Vicar of the fashionable Church of +the Whited Sepulchre. He collected some subscriptions from a number of +semi-imbecile old women who attended his church. With some of this +money he bought a quantity of timber and opened what he called a Labour +Yard, where he employed a number of men sawing firewood. Being a +clergyman, and because he said he wanted it for a charitable purpose, +of course he obtained the timber very cheaply--for about half what +anyone else would have had to pay for it. + +The wood-sawing was done piecework. A log of wood about the size of a +railway sleeper had to be sawn into twelve pieces, and each of these +had to be chopped into four. For sawing and chopping one log in this +manner the worker was paid ninepence. One log made two bags of +firewood, which were sold for a shilling each--a trifle under the usual +price. The men who delivered the bags were paid three half-pence for +each two bags. + +As there were such a lot of men wanting to do this work, no one was +allowed to do more than three lots in one day--that came to two +shillings and threepence--and no one was allowed to do more than two +days in one week. + +The Vicar had a number of bills printed and displayed in shop windows +calling attention to what he was doing, and informing the public that +orders could be sent to the Vicarage by post and would receive prompt +attention and the fuel could be delivered at any address--Messrs +Rushton & Co. having very kindly lent a handcart for the use of the men +employed at the Labour Yard. + +As a result of the appearance of this bill, and of the laudatory +notices in the columns of the Ananias, the Obscurer, and the +Chloroform--the papers did not mind giving the business a free +advertisement, because it was a charitable concern--many persons +withdrew their custom from those who usually supplied them with +firewood, and gave their orders to the Yard; and they had the +satisfaction of getting their fuel cheaper than before and of +performing a charitable action at the same time. + +As a remedy for unemployment this scheme was on a par with the method +of the tailor in the fable who thought to lengthen his cloth by cutting +a piece off one end and sewing it on to the other; but there was one +thing about it that recommended it to the Vicar--it was +self-supporting. He found that there would be no need to use all the +money he had extracted from the semi-imbecile old ladies for timber, so +he bought himself a Newfoundland dog, an antique set of carved ivory +chessmen, and a dozen bottles of whisky with the remainder of the cash. + +The reverend gentleman hit upon yet another means of helping the poor. +He wrote a letter to the Weekly Chloroform appealing for cast-off boots +for poor children. This was considered such a splendid idea that the +editors of all the local papers referred to it in leading articles, and +several other letters were written by prominent citizens extolling the +wisdom and benevolence of the profound Bosher. Most of the boots that +were sent in response to this appeal had been worn until they needed +repair--in a very large proportion of instances, until they were beyond +repair. The poor people to whom they were given could not afford to +have them mended before using them, and the result was that the boots +generally began to fall to pieces after a few days' wear. + +This scheme amounted to very little. It did not increase the number of +cast-off boots, and most of the people who 'cast off' their boots +generally gave them to someone or other. The only difference It can +have made was that possibly a few persons who usually threw their boots +away or sold them to second-hand dealers may have been induced to send +them to Mr Bosher instead. But all the same nearly everybody said it +was a splendid idea: its originator was applauded as a public +benefactor, and the pettifogging busybodies who amused themselves with +what they were pleased to term 'charitable work' went into imbecile +ecstasies over him. + + + +Chapter 36 + +The OBS + + +One of the most important agencies for the relief of distress was the +Organized Benevolence Society. This association received money from +many sources. The proceeds of the fancy-dress carnival; the +collections from different churches and chapels which held special +services in aid of the unemployed; the weekly collections made by the +employees of several local firms and business houses; the proceeds of +concerts, bazaars, and entertainments, donations from charitable +persons, and the subscriptions of the members. The society also +received large quantities of cast-off clothing and boots, and tickets +of admission to hospitals, convalescent homes and dispensaries from +subscribers to those institutions, or from people like Rushton & Co., +who had collecting-boxes in their workshops and offices. + +Altogether during the last year the Society had received from various +sources about three hundred pounds in hard cash. This money was +devoted to the relief of cases of distress. + +The largest item in the expenditure of the Society was the salary of +the General Secretary, Mr Sawney Grinder--a most deserving case--who +was paid one hundred pounds a year. + +After the death of the previous secretary there were so many candidates +for the vacant post that the election of the new secretary was a rather +exciting affair. The excitement was all the more intense because it +was restrained. A special meeting of the society was held: the Mayor, +Alderman Sweater, presided, and amongst those present were Councillors +Rushton, Didlum and Grinder, Mrs Starvem, Rev. Mr Bosher, a number of +the rich, semi-imbecile old women who had helped to open the Labour +Yard, and several other 'ladies'. Some of these were the district +visitors already alluded to, most of them the wives of wealthy citizens +and retired tradesmen, richly dressed, ignorant, insolent, overbearing +frumps, who--after filling themselves with good things in their own +luxurious homes--went flouncing into the poverty-stricken dwellings of +their poor 'sisters' and talked to them of 'religion', lectured them +about sobriety and thrift, and--sometimes--gave them tickets for soup +or orders for shillingsworths of groceries or coal. Some of these +overfed females--the wives of tradesmen, for instance--belonged to the +Organized Benevolence Society, and engaged in this 'work' for the +purpose of becoming acquainted with people of superior social +position--one of the members was a colonel, and Sir Graball +D'Encloseland--the Member of Parliament for the borough--also belonged +to the Society and occasionally attended its meetings. Others took up +district visiting as a hobby; they had nothing to do, and being densely +ignorant and of inferior mentality, they had no desire or capacity for +any intellectual pursuit. So they took up this work for the pleasure +of playing the grand lady and the superior person at a very small +expense. Other of these visiting ladies were middle-aged, unmarried +women with small private incomes--some of them well-meaning, +compassionate, gentle creatures who did this work because they +sincerely desired to help others, and they knew of no better way. These +did not take much part in the business of the meetings; they paid their +subscriptions and helped to distribute the cast-off clothing and boots +to those who needed them, and occasionally obtained from the secretary +an order for provisions or coal or bread for some poverty-stricken +family; but the poor, toil-worn women whom they visited welcomed them +more for their sisterly sympathy than for the gifts they brought. Some +of the visiting ladies were of this character--but they were not many. +They were as a few fragrant flowers amidst a dense accumulation of +noxious weeds. They were examples of humility and kindness shining +amidst a vile and loathsome mass of hypocrisy, arrogance, and cant. + +When the Chairman had opened the meeting, Mr Rushton moved a vote of +condolence with the relatives of the late secretary whom he eulogized +in the most extraordinary terms. + +'The poor of Mugsborough had lost a kind and sympathetic friend', 'One +who had devoted his life to helping the needy', and so on and so forth. +(As a matter of fact, most of the time of the defunct had been passed +in helping himself, but Rushton said nothing about that.) + +Mr Didlum seconded the vote of condolence in similar terms, and it was +carried unanimously. Then the Chairman said that the next business was +to elect a successor to the departed paragon; and immediately no fewer +than nine members rose to propose a suitable person--they each had a +noble-minded friend or relative willing to sacrifice himself for the +good of the poor. + +The nine Benevolent stood looking at each other and at the Chairman +with sickly smiles upon their hypocritical faces. It was a dramatic +moment. No one spoke. It was necessary to be careful. It would never +do to have a contest. The Secretary of the OBS was usually regarded as +a sort of philanthropist by the outside public, and it was necessary to +keep this fiction alive. + +For one or two minutes an awkward silence reigned. Then, one after +another they all reluctantly resumed their seats with the exception of +Mr Amos Grinder, who said he wished to propose his nephew, Mr Sawney +Grinder, a young man of a most benevolent disposition who was desirous +of immolating himself upon the altar of charity for the benefit of the +poor--or words to that effect. + +Mr Didlum seconded, and there being no other nomination--for they all +knew that it would give the game away to have a contest--the Chairman +put Mr Grinder's proposal to the meeting and declared it carried +unanimously. + +Another considerable item in the expenditure of the society was the +rent of the offices--a house in a back street. The landlord of this +place was another very deserving case. + +There were numerous other expenses: stationery and stamps, printing, +and so on, and what was left of the money was used for the purpose for +which it had been given--a reasonable amount being kept in hand for +future expenses. All the details were of course duly set forth in the +Report and Balance Sheet at the annual meetings. No copy of this +document was ever handed to the reporters for publication; it was read +to the meeting by the Secretary; the representatives of the Press took +notes, and in the reports of the meeting that subsequently appeared in +the local papers the thing was so mixed up and garbled together that +the few people who read it could not make head or tail of it. The only +thing that was clear was that the society had been doing a great deal +of good to someone or other, and that more money was urgently needed to +carry on the work. It usually appeared something like this: + + HELPING THE NEEDY + Mugsborough Organized Benevolence Society + Annual Meeting at the Town Hall + + A Splendid record of Miscellaneous and Valuable Work. + + The annual meeting of the above Society was held yesterday at the + Town Hall. The Mayor, Alderman Sweater, presided, and amongst + those present were Sir Graball D'Encloseland, Lady D'Encloseland, + Lady Slumrent. Rev. Mr Bosher, Mr Cheeseman, Mrs Bilder, Mrs + Grosare, Mrs Daree, Mrs Butcher, Mrs Taylor, Mrs Baker, Mrs + Starvem, Mrs Slodging, Mrs M. B. Sile, Mrs Knobrane, Mrs M. T. + Head, Mr Rushton, Mr Didlum, Mr Grinder and (here followed about a + quarter of a column of names of other charitable persons, all + subscribers to the Society). + + The Secretary read the annual report which contained the following + amongst other interesting items: + + + During the year, 1,972 applications for assistance have been + received, and of this number 1,302 have been assisted as follows: + Bread or grocery orders, 273. Coal or coke orders, 57. + Nourishment 579. (Applause.) Pairs of boots granted, 29. + Clothing, 105. Crutch granted to poor man, 1. Nurses provided, + 2. Hospital tickets, 26. Sent to Consumption Sanatorium, 1. + Twenty-nine persons, whose cases being chronic, were referred to + the Poor Law Guardians. Work found for 19 persons. (Cheers.) + Pedlar's licences, 4. Dispensary tickets, 24. Bedding redeemed, + 1. Loans granted to people to enable them to pay their rent, 8. + (Loud cheers.) Dental tickets, 2. Railway fares for men who were + going away from the town to employment elsewhere, 12. (Great + cheering.) Loans granted, 5. Advertisements for employment, 4-- + and so on. + +There was about another quarter of a column of these details, the +reading of which was punctuated with applause and concluded with: +'Leaving 670 cases which for various reasons the Society was unable to +assist'. The report then went on to explain that the work of inquiring +into the genuineness of the applications entailed a lot of labour on +the part of the Secretary, some cases taking several days. No fewer +than 649 letters had been sent out from the office, and 97 postcards. +(Applause.) Very few cash gifts were granted, as it was most necessary +to guard against the Charity being abused. (Hear, hear.) + +Then followed a most remarkable paragraph headed 'The Balance Sheet', +which--as it was put--'included the following'. 'The following' was a +jumbled list of items of expenditure, subscriptions, donations, +legacies, and collections, winding up with 'the general summary showed +a balance in hand of L178.4.6'. (They always kept a good balance in +hand because of the Secretary's salary and the rent of the offices.) + +After this very explicit financial statement came the most important +part of the report: 'Thanks are expressed to Sir Graball D'Encloseland +for a donation of 2 guineas. Mrs Grosare, 1 guinea. Mrs Starvem, +Hospital tickets. Lady Slumrent, letter of admission to Convalescent +Home. Mrs Knobrane, 1 guinea. Mrs M.B. Sile, 1 guinea. Mrs M.T. +Head, 1 guinea. Mrs Sledging, gifts of clothing--and so on for another +quarter of a column, the whole concluding with a vote of thanks to the +Secretary and an urgent appeal to the charitable public for more funds +to enable the Society to continue its noble work. + +Meantime, in spite of this and kindred organizations the conditions of +the under-paid poverty stricken and unemployed workers remained the +same. Although the people who got the grocery and coal orders, the +'Nourishment', and the cast-off clothes and boots, were very glad to +have them, yet these things did far more harm than good. They +humiliated, degraded and pauperized those who received them, and the +existence of the societies prevented the problem being grappled with in +a sane and practical manner. The people lacked the necessaries of +life: the necessaries of life are produced by Work: these people were +willing to work, but were prevented from doing so by the idiotic system +of society which these 'charitable' people are determined to do their +best to perpetuate. + +If the people who expect to be praised and glorified for being +charitable were never to give another farthing it would be far better +for the industrious poor, because then the community as a whole would +be compelled to deal with the absurd and unnecessary state of affairs +that exists today--millions of people living and dying in wretchedness +and poverty in an age when science and machinery have made it possible +to produce such an abundance of everything that everyone might enjoy +plenty and comfort. It if were not for all this so-called charity the +starving unemployed men all over the country would demand to be allowed +to work and produce the things they are perishing for want of, instead +of being--as they are now--content to wear their masters' cast-off +clothing and to eat the crumbs that fall from his table. + + + +Chapter 37 + +A Brilliant Epigram + + +All through the winter, the wise, practical, philanthropic, fat persons +whom the people of Mugsborough had elected to manage their affairs--or +whom they permitted to manage them without being elected--continued to +grapple, or to pretend to grapple, with the 'problem' of unemployment +and poverty. They continued to hold meetings, rummage and jumble +sales, entertainments and special services. They continued to +distribute the rotten cast-off clothing and boots, and the nourishment +tickets. They were all so sorry for the poor, especially for the 'dear +little children'. They did all sorts of things to help the children. +In fact, there was nothing that they would not do for them except levy +a halfpenny rate. It would never do to do that. It might pauperize +the parents and destroy parental responsibility. They evidently +thought that it would be better to destroy the health or even the lives +of the 'dear little children' than to pauperize the parents or +undermine parental responsibility. These people seemed to think that +the children were the property of their parents. They did not have +sense enough to see that the children are not the property of their +parents at all, but the property of the community. When they attain to +manhood and womanhood they will be, if mentally or physically +inefficient, a burden on the community; if they become criminals, they +will prey upon the community, and if they are healthy, educated and +brought up in good surroundings, they will become useful citizens, able +to render valuable service, not merely to their parents, but to the +community. Therefore the children are the property of the community, +and it is the business and to the interest of the community to see that +their constitutions are not undermined by starvation. The Secretary of +the local Trades Council, a body formed of delegates from all the +different trades unions in the town, wrote a letter to the Obscurer, +setting forth this view. He pointed out that a halfpenny rate in that +town would produce a sum of L800, which would be more than sufficient +to provide food for all the hungry schoolchildren. In the next issue +of the paper several other letters appeared from leading citizens, +including, of course, Sweater, Rushton, Didlum and Grinder, ridiculing +the proposal of the Trades Council, who were insultingly alluded to as +'pothouse politicians', 'beer-sodden agitators' and so forth. Their +right to be regarded as representatives of the working men was denied, +and Grinder, who, having made inquiries amongst working men, was +acquainted with the facts, stated that there was scarcely one of the +local branches of the trades unions which had more than a dozen +members; and as Grinder's statement was true, the Secretary was unable +to contradict it. The majority of the working men were also very +indignant when they heard about the Secretary's letter: they said the +rates were quite high enough as it was, and they sneered at him for +presuming to write to the papers at all: + +'Who the bloody 'ell was 'e?' they said. ''E was not a Gentleman! 'E +was only a workin' man the same as themselves--a common carpenter! What +the 'ell did 'e know about it? Nothing. 'E was just trying to make +'isself out to be Somebody, that was all. The idea of one of the likes +of them writing to the papers!' + +One day, having nothing better to do, Owen was looking at some books +that were exposed for sale on a table outside a second-hand furniture +shop. One book in particular took his attention: he read several pages +with great interest, and regretted that he had not the necessary +sixpence to buy it. The title of the book was: Consumption: Its Causes +and Its Cure. The author was a well-known physician who devoted his +whole attention to the study of that disease. Amongst other things, +the book gave rules for the feeding of delicate children, and there +were also several different dietaries recommended for adult persons +suffering from the disease. One of these dietaries amused him very +much, because as far as the majority of those who suffer from +consumption are concerned, the good doctor might just as well have +prescribed a trip to the moon: + +'Immediately on waking in the morning, half a pint of milk--this should +be hot, if possible--with a small slice of bread and butter. + +'At breakfast: half a pint of milk, with coffee, chocolate, or oatmeal: +eggs and bacon, bread and butter, or dry toast. + +'At eleven o'clock: half a pint of milk with an egg beaten up in it or +some beef tea and bread and butter. + +'At one o'clock: half a pint of warm milk with a biscuit or sandwich. + +'At two o'clock: fish and roast mutton, or a mutton chop, with as much +fat as possible: poultry, game, etc., may be taken with vegetables, and +milk pudding. + +'At five o'clock: hot milk with coffee or chocolate, bread and butter, +watercress, etc. + +'At eight o'clock: a pint of milk, with oatmeal or chocolate, and +gluten bread, or two lightly boiled eggs with bread and butter. + +'Before retiring to rest: a glass of warm milk. + +'During the night: a glass of milk with a biscuit or bread and butter +should be placed by the bedside and be eaten if the patient awakes.' + +Whilst Owen was reading this book, Crass, Harlow, Philpot and Easton +were talking together on the other side of the street, and presently +Crass caught sight of him. They had been discussing the Secretary's +letter re the halfpenny rate, and as Owen was one of the members of the +Trades Council, Crass suggested that they should go across and tackle +him about it. + +'How much is your house assessed at?' asked Owen after listening for +about a quarter of an hour to Crass's objection. + +'Fourteen pound,' replied Crass. + +'That means that you would have to pay sevenpence per year if we had a +halfpenny rate. Wouldn't it be worth sevenpence a year to you to know +that there were no starving children in the town?' + +'Why should I 'ave to 'elp to keep the children of a man who's too lazy +to work, or spends all 'is money on drink?' shouted Crass. ''Ow are +yer goin' to make out about the likes o' them?' + +'If his children are starving we should feed them first, and punish him +afterwards.' + +'The rates is quite high enough as it is,' grumbled Harlow, who had +four children himself. + +'That's quite true, but you must remember that the rates the working +classes at present pay are spent mostly for the benefit of other +people. Good roads are maintained for people who ride in motor cars +and carriages; the Park and the Town Band for those who have leisure to +enjoy them; the Police force to protect the property of those who have +something to lose, and so on. But if we pay this rate we shall get +something for our money.' + +'We gets the benefit of the good roads when we 'as to push a 'andcart +with a load o' paint and ladders,' said Easton. + +'Of course,' said Crass, 'and besides, the workin' class gets the +benefit of all the other things too, because it all makes work.' + +'Well, for my part,' said Philpot, 'I wouldn't mind payin' my share +towards a 'appeny rate, although I ain't got no kids o' me own.' + +The hostility of most of the working men to the proposed rate was +almost as bitter as that of the 'better' classes--the noble-minded +philanthropists who were always gushing out their sympathy for the +'dear little ones', the loathsome hypocrites who pretended that there +was no need to levy a rate because they were willing to give sufficient +money in the form of charity to meet the case: but the children +continued to go hungry all the same. + +'Loathsome hypocrites' may seem a hard saying, but it was a matter of +common knowledge that the majority of the children attending the local +elementary schools were insufficiently fed. It was admitted that the +money that could be raised by a halfpenny rate would be more than +sufficient to provide them all with one good meal every day. The +charity-mongers who professed such extravagant sympathy with the 'dear +little children' resisted the levying of the rate 'because it would +press so heavily on the poorer ratepayers', and said that they were +willing to give more in voluntary charity than the rate would amount +to: but, the 'dear little children'--as they were so fond of calling +them--continued to go to school hungry all the same. + +To judge them by their profession and their performances, it appeared +that these good kind persons were willing to do any mortal thing for +the 'dear little children' except allow them to be fed. + +If these people had really meant to do what they pretended, they would +not have cared whether they paid the money to a rate-collector or to +the secretary of a charity society and they would have preferred to +accomplish their object in the most efficient and economical way. + +But although they would not allow the children to be fed, they went to +church and to chapel, glittering with jewellery, their fat carcases +clothed in rich raiment, and sat with smug smiles upon their faces +listening to the fat parsons reading out of a Book that none of them +seemed able to understand, for this was what they read: + +'And Jesus called a little child unto Him, and set him in the midst of +them, and said: Whosoever shall receive one such little child in My +name, receiveth Me. But whoso shall offend one of these little ones, +it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck and +that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. + +'Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones, for I say unto +you that in heaven their angels do always behold the face of My Father.' + +And this: 'Then shall He say unto them: Depart from me, ye cursed, into +the everlasting fire prepared for the devil and his angels: for I was +an hungered and ye gave Me no meat: I was thirsty and ye gave Me no +drink: I was a stranger and ye took Me not in; naked, and ye clothed Me +not. + +'Then shall they answer: "Lord, when saw we Thee an hungered or athirst +or a stranger or naked, or sick, and did not minister unto Thee?" and +He shall answer them, "Verily I say unto you, inasmuch as ye did it not +to one of the least of these, ye did it not to Me."' + +These were the sayings that the infidel parsons mouthed in the infidel +temples to the richly dressed infidel congregations, who heard but did +not understand, for their hearts were become gross and their ears dull +of hearing. And meantime, all around them, in the alley and the slum, +and more terrible still--because more secret--in the better sort of +streets where lived the respectable class of skilled artisans, the +little children became thinner and paler day by day for lack of proper +food, and went to bed early because there was no fire. + +Sir Graball D'Encloseland, the Member of Parliament for the borough, +was one of the bitterest opponents of the halfpenny rate, but as he +thought it was probable that there would soon be another General +Election and he wanted the children's fathers to vote for him again, he +was willing to do something for them in another way. He had a +ten-year-old daughter whose birthday was in that month, so the +kind-hearted Baronet made arrangements to give a Tea to all the school +children in the town in honour of the occasion. The tea was served in +the schoolrooms and each child was presented with a gilt-edged card on +which was a printed portrait of the little hostess, with 'From your +loving little friend, Honoria D'Encloseland', in gold letters. During +the evening the little girl, accompanied by Sir Graball and Lady +D'Encloseland, motored round to all the schools where the tea was being +consumed: the Baronet made a few remarks, and Honoria made a pretty +little speech, specially learnt for the occasion, at each place, and +they were loudly cheered and greatly admired in response. The +enthusiasm was not confined to the boys and girls, for while the +speechmaking was going on inside, a little crowd of grown-up children +were gathered round outside the entrance, worshipping the motor car: +and when the little party came out the crowd worshipped them also, +going into imbecile ecstasies of admiration of their benevolence and +their beautiful clothes. + +For several weeks everybody in the town was in raptures over this +tea--or, rather, everybody except a miserable little minority of +Socialists, who said it was bribery, an electioneering dodge, that did +no real good, and who continued to clamour for a halfpenny rate. + +Another specious fraud was the 'Distress Committee'. This body--or +corpse, for there was not much vitality in it--was supposed to exist +for the purpose of providing employment for 'deserving cases'. One +might be excused for thinking that any man--no matter what his past may +have been--who is willing to work for his living is a 'deserving case': +but this was evidently not the opinion of the persons who devised the +regulations for the working of this committee. Every applicant for +work was immediately given a long job, and presented with a double +sheet of foolscap paper to do it with. Now, if the object of the +committee had been to furnish the applicant with material for the +manufacture of an appropriate headdress for himself, no one could +reasonably have found fault with them: but the foolscap was not to be +utilized in that way; it was called a 'Record Paper', three pages of it +were covered with insulting, inquisitive, irrelevant questions +concerning the private affairs and past life of the 'case' who wished +to be permitted to work for his living, and all these had to be +answered to the satisfaction of Messrs D'Encloseland, Bosher, Sweater, +Rushton, Didlum, Grinder and the other members of the committee, before +the case stood any chance of getting employment. + +However, notwithstanding the offensive nature of the questions on the +application form, during the five months that this precious committee +was in session, no fewer than 1,237 broken-spirited and humble 'lion's +whelps' filled up the forms and answered the questions as meekly as if +they had been sheep. The funds of the committee consisted of L500, +obtained from the Imperial Exchequer, and about L250 in charitable +donations. This money was used to pay wages for certain work--some of +which would have had to be done even if the committee had never +existed--and if each of the 1,237 applicants had had an equal share of +the work, the wages they would have received would have amounted to +about twelve shillings each. This was what the 'practical' persons, +the 'business-men', called 'dealing with the problem of unemployment'. +Imagine having to keep your family for five months with twelve +shillings! + +And, if you like, imagine that the Government grant had been four times +as much as it was, and that the charity had amounted to four times as +much as it did, and then fancy having to keep your family for five +months with two pounds eight shillings! + +It is true that some of the members of the committee would have been +very glad if they had been able to put the means of earning a living +within the reach of every man who was willing to work; but they simply +did not know what to do, or how to do it. They were not ignorant of +the reality of the evil they were supposed to be 'dealing +with'--appalling evidences of it faced them on every side, and as, +after all, these committee men were human beings and not devils, they +would have been glad to mitigate it if they could have done so without +hurting themselves: but the truth was that they did not know what to do! + +These are the 'practical' men; the monopolists of intelligence, the +wise individuals who control the affairs of the world: it is in +accordance with the ideas of such men as these that the conditions of +human life are regulated. + +This is the position: + +It is admitted that never before in the history of mankind was it +possible to produce the necessaries of life in such abundance as at +present. + +The management of the affairs of the world--the business of arranging +the conditions under which we live--is at present in the hands of +Practical, Level-headed, Sensible Business-men. + +The result of their management is, that the majority of the people find +it a hard struggle to live. Large numbers exist in perpetual poverty: +a great many more periodically starve: many actually die of want: +hundreds destroy themselves rather than continue to live and suffer. + +When the Practical, Level-headed, Sensible Business-men are asked why +they do not remedy this state of things, they reply that they do not +know what to do! or, that it is impossible to remedy it! + +And yet it is admitted that it is now possible to produce the +necessaries of life, in greater abundance than ever before! + +With lavish kindness, the Supreme Being had provided all things +necessary for the existence and happiness of his creatures. To suggest +that it is not so is a blasphemous lie: it is to suggest that the +Supreme Being is not good or even just. On every side there is an +overflowing superfluity of the materials requisite for the production +of all the necessaries of life: from these materials everything we need +may be produced in abundance--by Work. Here was an army of people +lacking the things that may be made by work, standing idle. Willing to +work; clamouring to be allowed to work, and the Practical, +Level-headed, Sensible Business-men did not know what to do! + +Of course, the real reason for the difficulty is that the raw materials +that were created for the use and benefit of all have been stolen by a +small number, who refuse to allow them to be used for the purposes for +which they were intended. This numerically insignificant minority +refused to allow the majority to work and produce the things they need; +and what work they do graciously permit to be done is not done with the +object of producing the necessaries of life for those who work, but for +the purpose of creating profit for their masters. + +And then, strangest fact of all, the people who find it a hard struggle +to live, or who exist in dreadful poverty and sometimes starve, instead +of trying to understand the causes of their misery and to find out a +remedy themselves, spend all their time applauding the Practical, +Sensible, Level-headed Business-men, who bungle and mismanage their +affairs, and pay them huge salaries for doing so. Sir Graball +D'Encloseland, for instance, was a 'Secretary of State' and was paid +L5,000 a year. When he first got the job the wages were only a +beggarly L2,000, but as he found it impossible to exist on less than +L100 a week he decided to raise his salary to that amount; and the +foolish people who find it a hard struggle to live paid it willingly, +and when they saw the beautiful motor car and the lovely clothes and +jewellery he purchased for his wife with the money, and heard the Great +Speech he made--telling them how the shortage of everything was caused +by Over-production and Foreign Competition, they clapped their hands +and went frantic with admiration. Their only regret was that there +were no horses attached to the motor car, because if there had been, +they could have taken them out and harnessed themselves to it instead. + +Nothing delighted the childish minds of these poor people so much as +listening to or reading extracts from the speeches of such men as +these; so in order to amuse them, every now and then, in the midst of +all the wretchedness, some of the great statesmen made 'great speeches' +full of cunning phrases intended to hoodwink the fools who had elected +them. The very same week that Sir Graball's salary was increased to +L5,000 a year, all the papers were full of a very fine one that he +made. They appeared with large headlines like this: + + GREAT SPEECH BY SIR GRABALL D'ENCLOSELAND + + Brilliant Epigram! + + None should have more than they need, whilst any have less than + they need! + +The hypocrisy of such a saying in the mouth of a man who was drawing a +salary of five thousand pounds a year did not appear to occur to +anyone. On the contrary, the hired scribes of the capitalist Press +wrote columns of fulsome admiration of the miserable claptrap, and the +working men who had elected this man went into raptures over the +'Brilliant Epigram' as if it were good to eat. They cut it out of the +papers and carried it about with them: they showed it to each other: +they read it and repeated it to each other: they wondered at it and +were delighted with it, grinning and gibbering at each other in the +exuberance of their imbecile enthusiasm. + +The Distress Committee was not the only body pretending to 'deal' with +the poverty 'problem': its efforts were supplemented by all the other +agencies already mentioned--the Labour Yard, the Rummage Sales, the +Organized Benevolence Society, and so on, to say nothing of a most +benevolent scheme originated by the management of Sweater's Emporium, +who announced in a letter that was published in the local Press that +they were prepared to employ fifty men for one week to carry sandwich +boards at one shilling--and a loaf of bread--per day. + +They got the men; some unskilled labourers, a few old, worn out +artisans whom misery had deprived of the last vestiges of pride or +shame; a number of habitual drunkards and loafers, and a non-descript +lot of poor ragged old men--old soldiers and others of whom it would be +impossible to say what they had once been. + +The procession of sandwich men was headed by the Semi-drunk and the +Besotted Wretch, and each board was covered with a printed poster: +'Great Sale of Ladies' Blouses now Proceeding at Adam Sweater's +Emporium.' + +Besides this artful scheme of Sweater's for getting a good +advertisement on the cheap, numerous other plans for providing +employment or alleviating the prevailing misery were put forward in the +columns of the local papers and at the various meetings that were held. +Any foolish, idiotic, useless suggestion was certain to receive +respectful attention; any crafty plan devised in his own interest or +for his own profit by one or other of the crew of sweaters and +landlords who controlled the town was sure to be approved of by the +other inhabitants of Mugsborough, the majority of whom were persons of +feeble intellect who not only allowed themselves to be robbed and +exploited by a few cunning scoundrels, but venerated and applauded them +for doing it. + + + +Chapter 38 + +The Brigands' Cave + + +One evening in the drawing-room at 'The Cave' there was a meeting of a +number of the 'Shining Lights' to arrange the details of a Rummage +Sale, that was to be held in aid of the unemployed. It was an informal +affair, and while they were waiting for the other luminaries, the early +arrivals, Messrs Rushton, Didlum and Grinder, Mr Oyley Sweater, the +Borough Surveyor, Mr Wireman, the electrical engineer who had been +engaged as an 'expert' to examine and report on the Electric Light +Works, and two or three other gentlemen--all members of the Band--took +advantage of the opportunity to discuss a number of things they were +mutually interested in, which were to be dealt with at the meeting of +the Town Council the next day. First, there was the affair of the +untenanted Kiosk on the Grand Parade. This building belonged to the +Corporation, and 'The Cosy Corner Refreshment Coy.' of which Mr Grinder +was the managing director, was thinking of hiring it to open as a +high-class refreshment lounge, provided the Corporation would make +certain alterations and let the place at a reasonable rent. Another +item which was to be discussed at the Council meeting was Mr Sweater's +generous offer to the Corporation respecting the new drain connecting +'The Cave' with the Town Main. + +The report of Mr Wireman, the electrical expert, was also to be dealt +with, and afterwards a resolution in favour of the purchase of the +Mugsborough Electric light and Installation Co. Ltd by the town, was to +be proposed. + +In addition to these matters, several other items, including a proposal +by Mr Didlum for an important reform in the matter of conducting the +meetings of the Council, formed subjects for animated conversation +between the brigands and their host. + +During this discussion other luminaries arrived, including several +ladies and the Rev. Mr Bosher, of the Church of the Whited Sepulchre. + +The drawing-room of 'The Cave' was now elaborately furnished. A large +mirror in a richly gilt frame reached from the carved marble +mantelpiece to the cornice. A magnificent clock in an alabaster case +stood in the centre of the mantelpiece and was flanked by two +exquisitely painted and gilded vases of Dresden ware. The windows were +draped with costly hangings, the floor was covered with a luxurious +carpet and expensive rugs. Sumptuously upholstered couches and easy +chairs added to the comfort of the apartment, which was warmed by the +immense fire of coal and oak logs that blazed and crackled in the grate. + +The conversation now became general and at times highly philosophical +in character, although Mr Bosher did not take much part, being too +busily engaged gobbling up the biscuits and tea, and only occasionally +spluttering out a reply when a remark or question was directly +addressed to him. + +This was Mr Grinder's first visit at the house, and he expressed his +admiration of the manner in which the ceiling and the walls were +decorated, remarking that he had always liked this 'ere Japanese style. + +Mr Bosher, with his mouth full of biscuit, mumbled that it was sweetly +pretty--charming--beautifully done--must have cost a lot of money. + +'Hardly wot you'd call Japanese, though, is it?' observed Didlum, +looking round with the air of a connoisseur. 'I should be inclined to +say it was rather more of the--er--Chinese or Egyptian.' + +'Moorish,' explained Mr Sweater with a smile. 'I got the idear at the +Paris Exhibition. It's simler to the decorations in the "Halambara", +the palace of the Sultan of Morocco. That clock there is in the same +style.' + +The case of the clock referred to--which stood on a table in a corner +of the room--was of fretwork, in the form of an Indian Mosque, with a +pointed dome and pinnacles. This was the case that Mary Linden had +sold to Didlum; the latter had had it stained a dark colour and +polished and further improved it by substituting a clock of more +suitable design than the one it originally held. Mr Sweater had +noticed it in Didlum's window and, seeing that the design was similar +in character to the painted decorations on the ceiling and walls of his +drawing-room, had purchased it. + +'I went to the Paris Exhibition meself,' said Grinder, when everyone +had admired the exquisite workmanship of the clock-case. 'I remember +'avin' a look at the moon through that big telescope. I was never so +surprised in me life: you can see it quite plain, and it's round!' + +'Round?' said Didlum with a puzzled look. 'Round? Of course it's +round! You didn't used to think it was square, did yer?' + +'No, of course not, but I always used to think it was flat--like a +plate, but it's round like a football.' + +'Certainly: the moon is a very simler body to the earth,' explained +Didlum, describing an aerial circle with a wave of his hand. They +moves through the air together, but the earth is always nearest to the +sun and consequently once a fortnight the shadder of the earth falls on +the moon and darkens it so that it's invisible to the naked eye. The +new moon is caused by the moon movin' a little bit out of the earth's +shadder, and it keeps on comin' more and more until we gets the full +moon; and then it goes back again into the shadder; and so it keeps on.' + +For about a minute everyone looked very solemn, and the profound +silence was disturbed only the the crunching of the biscuits between +the jaws of Mr Bosher, and by certain gurglings in the interior of that +gentleman. + +'Science is a wonderful thing,' said Mr Sweater at length, wagging his +head gravely, 'wonderful!' + +'Yes: but a lot of it is mere theory, you know,' observed Rushton. +'Take this idear that the world is round, for instance; I fail to see +it! And then they say as Hawstralia is on the other side of the globe, +underneath our feet. In my opinion it's ridiculous, because if it was +true, wot's to prevent the people droppin' orf?' + +'Yes: well, of course it's very strange,' admitted Sweater. 'I've +often thought of that myself. If it was true, we ought to be able to +walk on the ceiling of this room, for instance; but of course we know +that's impossible, and I really don't see that the other is any more +reasonable.' + +'I've often noticed flies walkin' on the ceilin',' remarked Didlum, who +felt called upon to defend the globular theory. + +'Yes; but they're different,' replied Rushton. 'Flies is provided by +nature with a gluey substance which oozes out of their feet for the +purpose of enabling them to walk upside down.' + +'There's one thing that seems to me to finish that idear once for all,' +said Grinder, 'and that is--water always finds its own level. You can't +get away from that; and if the world was round, as they want us to +believe, all the water would run off except just a little at the top. +To my mind, that settles the whole argymint.' + +'Another thing that gets over me,' continued Rushton, 'is this: +according to science, the earth turns round on its axle at the rate of +twenty miles a minit. Well, what about when a lark goes up in the sky +and stays there about a quarter of an hour? Why, if it was true that +the earth was turnin' round at that rate all the time, when the bird +came down it would find itself 'undreds of miles away from the place +where it went up from! But that doesn't 'appen at all; the bird always +comes down in the same spot.' + +'Yes, and the same thing applies to balloons and flyin' machines,' said +Grinder. 'If it was true that the world is spinnin' round on its axle +so quick as that, if a man started out from Calais to fly to Dover, by +the time he got to England he'd find 'imself in North America, or +p'r'aps farther off still.' + +'And if it was true that the world goes round the sun at the rate they +makes out, when a balloon went up, the earth would run away from it! +They'd never be able to get back again!' remarked Rushton. + +This was so obvious that nearly everyone said there was probably +something in it, and Didlum could think of no reply. Mr Bosher upon +being appealed to for his opinion, explained that science was alright +in its way, but unreliable: the things scientists said yesterday they +contradicted today, and what they said today they would probably +repudiate tomorrow. It was necessary to be very cautious before +accepting any of their assertions. + +'Talking about science,' said Grinder, as the holy man relapsed into +silence and started on another biscuit and a fresh cup of tea. 'Talking +about science reminds me of a conversation I 'ad with Dr Weakling the +other day. You know, he believes we're all descended from monkeys.' + +Everyone laughed; the thing was so absurd: the idea of placing +intellectual beings on a level with animals! + +'But just wait till you hear how nicely I flattened 'im out,' continued +Grinder. 'After we'd been arguin' a long time about wot 'e called +everlution or some sich name, and a lot more tommy-rot that I couldn't +make no 'ead or tail of--and to tell you the truth I don't believe 'e +understood 'arf of it 'imself--I ses to 'im, "Well," I ses, "if it's +true that we're hall descended from monkeys," I ses, "I think your +famly must 'ave left orf where mine begun."' + +In the midst of the laughter that greeted the conclusion of Grinder's +story it was seen that Mr Bosher had become black in the face. He was +waving his arms and writhing about like one in a fit, his goggle eyes +bursting from their sockets, whilst his huge stomach quivering +spasmodically, alternately contracted and expanded as if it were about +to explode. + +In the exuberance of his mirth, the unfortunate disciple had swallowed +two biscuits at once. Everybody rushed to his assistance, Grinder and +Didlum seized an arm and a shoulder each and forced his head down. +Rushton punched him in the back and the ladies shrieked with alarm. +They gave him a big drink of tea to help to get the biscuits down, and +when he at last succeeded in swallowing them he sat in the armchair +with his eyes red-rimmed and full of tears, which ran down over his +white, flabby face. + +The arrival of the other members of the committee put an end to the +interesting discussion, and they shortly afterwards proceeded with the +business for which the meeting had been called--the arrangements for +the forthcoming Rummage Sale. + + + +Chapter 39 + +The Brigands at Work + + +The next day, at the meeting of the Town Council, Mr Wireman's report +concerning the Electric Light Works was read. The expert's opinion was +so favourable--and it was endorsed by the Borough Engineer, Mr Oyley +Sweater--that a resolution was unanimously carried in favour of +acquiring the Works for the town, and a secret committee was appointed +to arrange the preliminaries. Alderman Sweater then suggested that a +suitable honorarium be voted to Mr Wireman for his services. This was +greeted with a murmur of approval from most of the members, and Mr +Didlum rose with the intention of proposing a resolution to that effect +when he was interrupted by Alderman Grinder, who said he couldn't see +no sense in giving the man a thing like that. 'Why not give him a sum +of money?' + +Several members said 'Hear, hear,' to this, but some of the others +laughed. + +'I can't see nothing to laugh at,' cried Grinder angrily. 'For my part +I wouldn't give you tuppence for all the honorariums in the country. I +move that we pay 'im a sum of money.' + +'I'll second that,' said another member of the Band--one of those who +had cried 'Hear, Hear.' + +Alderman Sweater said that there seemed to be a little misunderstanding +and explained that an honorarium WAS a sum of money. + +'Oh, well, in that case I'll withdraw my resolution,' said Grinder. 'I +thought you wanted to give 'im a 'luminated address or something like +that.' + +Didlum now moved that a letter of thanks and a fee of fifty guineas be +voted to Mr Wireman, and this was also unanimously agreed to. Dr +Weakling said that it seemed rather a lot, but he did not go so far as +to vote against it. + +The next business was the proposal that the Corporation should take +over the drain connecting Mr Sweater's house with the town main. Mr +Sweater--being a public-spirited man--proposed to hand this connecting +drain--which ran through a private road--over to the Corporation to be +theirs and their successors for ever, on condition that they would pay +him the cost of construction--L55--and agreed to keep it in proper +repair. After a brief discussion it was decided to take over the drain +on the terms offered, and then Councillor Didlum proposed a vote of +thanks to Alderman Sweater for his generosity in the matter: this was +promptly seconded by Councillor Rushton and would have been carried +nem. con., but for the disgraceful conduct of Dr Weakling, who had the +bad taste to suggest that the amount was about double what the drain +could possibly have cost to construct, that it was of no use to the +Corporation at all, and that they would merely acquire the liability to +keep it in repair. + +However, no one took the trouble to reply to Weakling, and the Band +proceeded to the consideration of the next business, which was Mr +Grinder's offer--on behalf of the 'Cosy Corner Refreshment Company'--to +take the Kiosk on the Grand Parade. Mr Grinder submitted a plan of +certain alterations that he would require the Corporation to make at +the Kiosk, and, provided the Council agreed to do this work he was +willing to take a lease of the place for five years at L20 per year. + +Councillor Didlum proposed that the offer of the 'Cosy Corner +Refreshment Co. Ltd' be accepted and the required alterations proceeded +with at once. The Kiosk had brought in no rent for nearly two years, +but, apart from that consideration, if they accepted this offer they +would be able to set some of the unemployed to work. (Applause.) + +Councillor Rushton seconded. + +Dr Weakling pointed out that as the proposed alterations would cost +about L175--according to the estimate of the Borough Engineer--and, the +rent being only L20 a year, it would mean that the Council would be L75 +out of pocket at the end of the five years; to say nothing of the +expense of keeping the place in repair during all that time. +(Disturbance.) He moved as an amendment that the alterations be made, +and that they then invite tenders, and let the place to the highest +bidder. (Great uproar.) + +Councillor Rushton said he was disgusted with the attitude taken up by +that man Weakling. (Applause.) Perhaps it was hardly right to call +him a man. (Hear! Hear!) In the matter of these alterations they had +had the use of Councillor Grinder's brains: it was he who first thought +of making these improvements in the Kiosk, and therefore he--or rather +the company he represented--had a moral right to the tenancy. (Loud +cheers.) + +Dr Weakling said that he thought it was understood that when a man was +elected to that Council it was because he was supposed to be willing to +use his brains for the benefit of his constituents. (Sardonic +laughter.) + +The Mayor asked if there was any seconder to Weakling's amendment, and +as there was not the original proposition was put and carried. + +Councillor Rushton suggested that a large shelter with seating +accommodation for about two hundred persons should be erected on the +Grand Parade near the Kiosk. The shelter would serve as a protection +against rain, or the rays of the sun in summer. It would add +materially to the comfort of visitors and would be a notable addition +to the attractions of the town. + +Councillor Didlum said it was a very good idear, and proposed that the +Surveyor be instructed to get out the plans. + +Dr Weakling opposed the motion. (Laughter.) It seemed to him that the +object was to benefit, not the town, but Mr Grinder. (Disturbance.) If +this shelter were erected, it would increase the value of the Kiosk as +a refreshment bar by a hundred per cent. If Mr Grinder wanted a +shelter for his customers he should pay for it himself. (Uproar.) He +(Dr Weakling) was sorry to have to say it, but he could not help +thinking that this was a Put-up job. (Loud cries of 'Withdraw' +'Apologize' 'Cast 'im out' and terrific uproar.) + +Weakling did not apologize or withdraw, but he said no more. Didlum's +proposition was carried, and the 'Band' went on to the next item on the +agenda, which was a proposal by Councillor Didlum to increase the +salary of Mr Oyley Sweater, the Borough Engineer, from fifteen pounds +to seventeen pounds per week. + +Councillor Didlum said that when they had a good man they ought to +appreciate him. (Applause.) Compared with other officials, the +Borough Engineer was not fairly paid. (Hear, hear.) The magistrates' +clerk received seventeen pounds a week. The Town Clerk seventeen +pounds per week. He did not wish it to be understood that he thought +those gentlemen were overpaid--far from it. (Hear, hear.) It was not +that they got too much but that the Engineer got too little. How could +they expect a man like that to exist on a paltry fifteen pounds a week? +Why, it was nothing more or less than sweating! (Hear, hear.) He had +much pleasure in moving that the Borough Engineer's salary be increased +to seventeen pounds a week, and that his annual holiday be extended +from a fortnight to one calendar month with hard la--he begged +pardon--with full pay. (Loud cheers.) + +Councillor Rushton said that he did not propose to make a long +speech--it was not necessary. He would content himself with formally +seconding Councillor Didlum's excellent proposition. (Applause.) + +Councillor Weakling, whose rising was greeted with derisive laughter, +said he must oppose the resolution. He wished it to be understood that +he was not actuated by any feeling of personal animosity towards the +Borough Engineer, but at the same time he considered it his duty to say +that in his (Dr Weakling's) opinion, that official would be dear at +half the price they were now paying him. (Disturbance.) He did not +appear to understand his business, nearly all the work that was done +cost in the end about double what the Borough Engineer estimated it +could be done for. (Liar.) He considered him to be a grossly +incompetent person (uproar) and was of opinion that if they were to +advertise they could get dozens of better men who would be glad to do +the work for five pounds a week. He moved that Mr Oyley Sweater be +asked to resign and that they advertise for a man at five pounds a +week. (Great uproar.) + +Councillor Grinder rose to a point of order. He appealed to the +Chairman to squash the amendment. (Applause.) + +Councillor Didlum remarked that he supposed Councillor Grinder meant +'quash': in that case, he would support the suggestion. + +Councillor Grinder said it was about time they put a stopper on that +feller Weakling. He (Grinder) did not care whether they called it +squashing or quashing; it was all the same so long as they nipped him +in the bud. (Cheers.) The man was a disgrace to the Council; always +interfering and hindering the business. + +The Mayor--Alderman Sweater--said that he did not think it consistent +with the dignity of that Council to waste any more time over this +scurrilous amendment. (Applause.) He was proud to say that it had +never even been seconded, and therefore he would put Mr Didlum's +resolution--a proposition which he had no hesitation in saying +reflected the highest credit upon that gentleman and upon all those who +supported it. (Vociferous cheers.) + +All those who were in favour signified their approval in the customary +manner, and as Weakling was the only one opposed, the resolution was +carried and the meeting proceeded to the next business. + +Councillor Rushton said that several influential ratepayers and +employers of labour had complained to him about the high wages of the +Corporation workmen, some of whom were paid sevenpence-halfpenny an +hour. Sevenpence an hour was the maximum wage paid to skilled workmen +by private employers in that town, and he failed to see why the +Corporation should pay more. (Hear, hear.) It had a very bad effect +on the minds of the men in the employment of private firms, tending to +make them dissatisfied with their wages. The same state of affairs +prevailed with regard to the unskilled labourers in the Council's +employment. Private employers could get that class of labour for +fourpence-halfpenny or fivepence an hour, and yet the corporation paid +fivepence-halfpenny and even sixpence for the same class of work. +(Shame.) It was not fair to the ratepayers. (Hear, hear.) Considering +that the men in the employment of the Corporation had almost constant +work, if there was to be a difference at all, they should get not more, +but less, than those who worked for private firms. (Cheers.) He moved +that the wages of the Corporation workmen be reduced in all cases to +the same level as those paid by private firms. + +Councillor Grinder seconded. He said it amounted to a positive +scandal. Why, in the summer-time some of these men drew as much as +35/- in a single week! (Shame.) and it was quite common for unskilled +labourers--fellers who did nothing but the very hardest and most +laborious work, sich as carrying sacks of cement, or digging up the +roads to get at the drains, and sich-like easy jobs--to walk off with +25/- a week! (Sensation.) He had often noticed some of these men +swaggering about the town on Sundays, dressed like millionaires and +cigared up! They seemed quite a different class of men from those who +worked for private firms, and to look at the way some of their children +was dressed you'd think their fathers was Cabinet Minstrels! No wonder +the ratepayers complained ot the high rates. Another grievance was +that all the Corporation workmen were allowed two days' holiday every +year, in addition to the Bank Holidays, and were paid for them! (Cries +of 'shame', 'Scandalous', 'Disgraceful', etc.) No private contractor +paid his men for Bank Holidays, and why should the Corporation do so? +He had much pleasure in seconding Councillor Rushton's resolution. + +Councillor Weakling opposed the motion. He thought that 35/- a week was +little enough for a man to keep a wife and family with (Rot), even if +all the men got it regularly, which they did not. Members should +consider what was the average amount per week throughout the whole +year, not merely the busy time, and if they did that they would find +that even the skilled men did not average more than 25/- a week, and in +many cases not so much. If this subject had not been introduced by +Councillor Rushton, he (Dr Weakling) had intended to propose that the +wages of the Corporation workmen should be increased to the standard +recognized by the Trades Unions. (Loud laughter.) It had been proved +that the notoriously short lives of the working people--whose average +span of life was about twenty years less than that of the well-to-do +classes--their increasingly inferior physique, and the high rate of +mortality amongst their children was caused by the wretched +remuneration they received for hard and tiring work, the excessive +number of hours they have to work, when employed, the bad quality of +their food, the badly constructed and insanitary homes their poverty +compels them to occupy, and the anxiety, worry, and depression of mind +they have to suffer when out of employment. (Cries of 'Rot', 'Bosh', +and loud laughter.) Councillor Didlum said, 'Rot'. It was a very good +word to describe the disease that was sapping the foundations of +society and destroying the health and happiness and the very lives of +so many of their fellow countrymen and women. (Renewed merriment and +shouts of 'Go and buy a red tie.') He appealed to the members to +reject the resolution. He was very glad to say that he believed it was +true that the workmen in the employ of the Corporation were a little +better off than those in the employ of private contractors, and if it +were so, it was as it should be. They had need to be better off than +the poverty-stricken, half-starved poor wretches who worked for private +firms. + +Councillor Didlum said that it was very evident that Dr Weakling had +obtained his seat on that Council by false pretences. If he had told +the ratepayers that he was a Socialist, they would never have elected +him. (Hear, hear.) Practically every Christian minister in the +country would agree with him (Didlum) when he said that the poverty of +the working classes was caused not by the 'wretched remuneration they +receive as wages', but by Drink. (Loud applause.) And he was very +sure that the testimony of the clergy of all denominations was more to +be relied upon than the opinion of a man like Dr Weakling. (Hear, +hear.) + +Dr Weakling said that if some of the clergymen referred to or some of +the members of the council had to exist and toil amid the same sordid +surroundings, overcrowding and ignorance as some of the working +classes, they would probably seek to secure some share of pleasure and +forgetfulness in drink themselves! (Great uproar and shouts of +'Order', 'Withdraw', 'Apologize'.) + +Councillor Grinder said that even if it was true that the haverage +lives of the working classes was twenty years shorter than those of the +better classes, he could not see what it had got to do with Dr +Weakling. (Hear, hear.) So long as the working class was contented to +die twenty years before their time, he failed to see what it had got to +do with other people. They was not runnin' short of workers, was they? +There was still plenty of 'em left. (Laughter.) So long as the +workin' class was satisfied to die orf--let 'em die orf! It was a free +country. (Applause.) The workin' class adn't arst Dr Weakling to +stick up for them, had they? If they wasn't satisfied, they would +stick up for theirselves! The working men didn't want the likes of Dr +Weakling to stick up for them, and they would let 'im know it when the +next election came round. If he (Grinder) was a wordly man, he would +not mind betting that the workin' men of Dr Weakling's ward would give +him 'the dirty kick out' next November. (Applause.) + +Councillor Weakling, who knew that this was probably true, made no +further protest. Rushton's proposition was carried, and then the Clerk +announced that the next item was the resolution Mr Didlum had given +notice of at the last meeting, and the Mayor accordingly called upon +that gentleman. + +Councillor Didlum, who was received with loud cheers, said that +unfortunately a certain member of that Council seemed to think he had a +right to oppose nearly everything that was brought forward. + +(The majority of the members of the Band glared malignantly at +Weakling.) + +He hoped that for once the individual he referred to would have the +decency to restrain himself, because the resolution he (Didlum) was +about to have the honour of proposing was one that he believed no +right-minded man--no matter what his politics or religious +opinions--could possibly object to; and he trusted that for the credit +of the Council it would be entered on the records as an unopposed +motion. The resolution was as follows: + +'That from this date all the meetings of this Council shall be opened +with prayer and closed with the singing of the Doxology.' (Loud +applause.) + +Councillor Rushton seconded the resolution, which was also supported by +Mr Grinder, who said that at a time like the present, when there was +sich a lot of infiddles about who said that we all came from monkeys, +the Council would be showing a good example to the working classes by +adopting the resolution. + +Councillor Weakling said nothing, so the new rule was carried nem. +con., and as there was no more business to be done it was put into +operation for the first time there and then. Mr Sweater conducting the +singing with a roll of paper--the plan of the drain of 'The Cave'--and +each member singing a different tune. + +Weakling withdrew during the singing, and afterwards, before the Band +dispersed, it was agreed that a certain number of them were to meet the +Chief at the Cave, on the following evening to arrange the details of +the proposed raid on the finances of the town in connection with the +sale of the Electric Light Works. + + + +Chapter 40 + +Vive la System! + + +The alterations which the Corporation had undertaken to make in the +Kiosk on the Grand Parade provided employment for several carpenters +and plasterers for about three weeks, and afterwards for several +painters. This fact was sufficient to secure the working men's +unqualified approval of the action of the Council in letting the place +to Grinder, and Councillor Weakling's opposition--the reasons of which +they did not take the trouble to inquire into or understand--they as +heartily condemned. All they knew or cared was that he had tried to +prevent the work being done, and that he had referred in insulting +terms to the working men of the town. What right had he to call them +half-starved, poverty-stricken, poor wretches? If it came to being +poverty-stricken, according to all accounts, he wasn't any too well orf +hisself. Some of those blokes who went swaggering about in frock-coats +and pot-'ats was just as 'ard up as anyone else if the truth was known. + +As for the Corporation workmen, it was quite right that their wages +should be reduced. Why should they get more money than anyone else? + +'It's us what's got to find the money,' they said. 'We're the +ratepayers, and why should we have to pay them more wages than we get +ourselves? And why should they be paid for holidays any more than us?' + +During the next few weeks the dearth of employment continued, for, of +course, the work at the Kiosk and the few others jobs that were being +done did not make much difference to the general situation. Groups of +workmen stood at the corners or walked aimlessly about the streets. +Most of them no longer troubled to go to the different firms to ask for +work, they were usually told that they would be sent for if wanted. + +During this time Owen did his best to convert the other men to his +views. He had accumulated a little library of Socialist books and +pamphlets which he lent to those he hoped to influence. Some of them +took these books and promised, with the air of men who were conferring +a great favour, that they would read them. As a rule, when they +returned them it was with vague expressions of approval, but they +usually evinced a disinclination to discuss the contents in detail +because, in nine instances out of ten, they had not attempted to read +them. As for those who did make a half-hearted effort to do so, in the +majority of cases their minds were so rusty and stultified by long +years of disuse, that, although the pamphlets were generally written in +such simple language that a child might have understood, the argument +was generally too obscure to be grasped by men whose minds were addled +by the stories told them by their Liberal and Tory masters. Some, when +Owen offered to lend them some books or pamphlets refused to accept +them, and others who did him the great favour of accepting them, +afterwards boasted that they had used them as toilet paper. + +Owen frequently entered into long arguments with the other men, saying +that it was the duty of the State to provide productive work for all +those who were willing to do it. Some few of them listened like men +who only vaguely understood, but were willing to be convinced. + +'Yes, mate. It's right enough what you say,' they would remark. +'Something ought to be done.' + +Others ridiculed this doctrine of State employment: It was all very +fine, but where was the money to come from? And then those who had +been disposed to agree with Owen could relapse into their old apathy. + +There were others who did not listen so quietly, but shouted with many +curses that it was the likes of such fellows as Owen who were +responsible for all the depression in trade. All this talk about +Socialism and State employment was frightening Capital out of the +country. Those who had money were afraid to invest it in industries, +or to have any work done for fear they would be robbed. When Owen +quoted statistics to prove that as far as commerce and the quantity +produced of commodities of all kinds was concerned, the last year had +been a record one, they became more infuriated than ever, and talked +threateningly of what they would like to do to those bloody Socialists +who were upsetting everything. + +One day Crass, who was one of these upholders of the existing system, +scored off Owen finely. A little group of them were standing talking +in the Wage Slave Market near the Fountain. In the course of the +argument, Owen made the remark that under existing conditions life was +not worth living, and Crass said that if he really thought so, there +was no compulsion about it; if he wasn't satisfied--if he didn't want +to live--he could go and die. Why the hell didn't he go and make a +hole in the water, or cut his bloody throat? + +On this particular occasion the subject of the argument was--at +first--the recent increase of the Borough Engineer's salary to +seventeen pounds per week. Owen had said it was robbery, but the +majority of the others expressed their approval of the increase. They +asked Owen if he expected a man like that to work for nothing! It was +not as if he were one of the likes of themselves. They said that, as +for it being robbery, Owen would be very glad to have the chance of +getting it himself. Most of them seemed to think the fact that anyone +would be glad to have seventeen pounds a week, proved that it was right +for them to pay that amount to the Borough Engineer! + +Usually whenever Owen reflected upon the gross injustices, and +inhumanity of the existing social disorder, he became convinced that it +could not possibly last; it was bound to fall to pieces because of its +own rottenness. It was not just, it was not common sense, and +therefore it could not endure. But always after one of these +arguments--or, rather, disputes--with his fellow workmen, he almost +relapsed into hopelessness and despondency, for then he realized how +vast and how strong are the fortifications that surround the present +system; the great barriers and ramparts of invincible ignorance, apathy +and self-contempt, which will have to be broken down before the system +of society of which they are the defences, can be swept away. + +At other times as he thought of this marvellous system, it presented +itself to him in such an aspect of almost comical absurdity that he was +forced to laugh and to wonder whether it really existed at all, or if +it were only an illusion of his own disordered mind. + +One of the things that the human race needed in order to exist was +shelter; so with much painful labour they had constructed a large +number of houses. Thousands of these houses were now standing +unoccupied, while millions of the people who had helped to build the +houses were either homeless or herding together in overcrowded hovels. + +These human beings had such a strange system of arranging their affairs +that if anyone were to go and burn down a lot of the houses he would be +conferring a great boon upon those who had built them, because such an +act would 'Make a lot more work!' + +Another very comical thing was that thousands of people wore broken +boots and ragged clothes, while millions of pairs of boots and +abundance of clothing, which they had helped to make, were locked up in +warehouses, and the System had the keys. + +Thousands of people lacked the necessaries of life. The necessaries of +life are all produced by work. The people who lacked begged to be +allowed to work and create those things of which they stood in need. +But the System prevented them from so doing. + +If anyone asked the System why it prevented these people from producing +the things of which they were in want, the System replied: + +'Because they have already produced too much. The markets are glutted. +The warehouses are filled and overflowing, and there is nothing more +for them to do.' + +There was in existence a huge accumulation of everything necessary. A +great number of the people whose labour had produced that vast store +were now living in want, but the System said that they could not be +permitted to partake of the things they had created. Then, after a +time, when these people, being reduced to the last extreme of misery, +cried out that they and their children were dying of hunger, the System +grudgingly unlocked the doors of the great warehouses, and taking out a +small part of the things that were stored within, distributed it +amongst the famished workers, at the same time reminding them that it +was Charity, because all the things in the warehouses, although they +had been made by the workers, were now the property of the people who +do nothing. + +And then the starving, bootless, ragged, stupid wretches fell down and +worshipped the System, and offered up their children as living +sacrifices upon its altars, saying: + +'This beautiful System is the only one possible, and the best that +human wisdom can devise. May the System live for ever! Cursed be +those who seek to destroy the System!' + +As the absurdity of the thing forced itself upon him, Owen, in spite of +the unhappiness he felt at the sight of all the misery by which he was +surrounded, laughed aloud and said to himself that if he was sane, then +all these people must be mad. + +In the face of such colossal imbecility it was absurd to hope for any +immediate improvement. The little already accomplished was the work of +a few self-sacrificing enthusiasts, battling against the opposition of +those they sought to benefit, and the results of their labours were, in +many instances, as pearls cast before the swine who stood watching for +opportunities to fall upon and rend their benefactors. + +There was only one hope. It was possible that the monopolists, +encouraged by the extraordinary stupidity and apathy of the people +would proceed to lay upon them even greater burdens, until at last, +goaded by suffering, and not having sufficient intelligence to +understand any other remedy, these miserable wretches would turn upon +their oppressors and drown both them and their System in a sea of blood. + +Besides the work at the Kiosk, towards the end of March things +gradually began to improve in other directions. Several firms began to +take on a few hands. Several large empty houses that were relet had to +be renovated for their new tenants, and there was a fair amount of +inside work arising out of the annual spring-cleaning in other houses. +There was not enough work to keep everyone employed, and most of those +who were taken on as a rule only managed to make a few hours a week, +but still it was better than absolute idleness, and there also began to +be talk of several large outside jobs that were to be done as soon as +the weather was settled. + +This bad weather, by the way, was a sort of boon to the defenders of +the present system, who were hard-up for sensible arguments to explain +the cause of poverty. One of the principal causes was, of course, the +weather, which was keeping everything back. There was not the +slightest doubt that if only the weather would allow there would always +be plenty of work, and poverty would be abolished. + +Rushton & Co. had a fair share of what work there was, and Crass, +Sawkins, Slyme and Owen were kept employed pretty regularly, although +they did not start until half past eight and left off at four. At +different houses in various parts of the town they had ceilings to wash +off and distemper, to strip the old paper from the walls, and to +repaint and paper the rooms, and sometimes there were the venetian +blinds to repair and repaint. Occasionally a few extra hands were +taken on for a few days, and discharged again as soon as the job they +were taken on to do was finished. + +The defenders of the existing system may possibly believe that the +knowledge that they would be discharged directly the job was done was a +very good incentive to industry, that they would naturally under these +circumstances do their best to get the work done as quickly as +possible. But then it must be remembered that most of the defenders of +the existing system are so constituted, that they can believe anything +provided it is not true and sufficiently silly. + +All the same, it was a fact that the workmen did do their very best to +get over this work in the shortest possible time, because although they +knew that to do so was contrary to their own interests, they also knew +that it would be very much more contrary to their interests not to do +so. Their only chance of being kept on if other work came in was to +tear into it for all they were worth. Consequently, most of the work +was rushed and botched and slobbered over in about half the time that +it would have taken to do it properly. Rooms for which the customers +paid to have three coats of paint were scamped with one or two. What +Misery did not know about scamping and faking the work, the men +suggested to and showed him in the hope of currying favour with him in +order that they might get the preference over others and be sent for +when the next job came in. This is the principal incentive provided by +the present system, the incentive to cheat. These fellows cheated the +customers of their money. They cheated themselves and their fellow +workmen of work, and their children of bread, but it was all for a good +cause--to make profit for their master. + +Harlow and Slyme did one job--a room that Rushton & Co. had contracted +to paint three coats. It was finished with two and the men cleared +away their paints. The next day, when Slyme went there to paper the +room, the lady of the house said that the painting was not yet +finished--it was to have another coat. Slyme assured her that it had +already had three, but, as the lady insisted, Slyme went to the shop +and sought out Misery. Harlow had been stood off, as there was not +another job in just then, but fortunately he happened to be standing in +the street outside the shop, so they called him and then the three of +them went round to the job and swore that the room had had three coats. +The lady protested that it was not so. She had watched the progress of +the work. Besides, it was impossible; they had only been there three +days. The first day they had not put any paint on at all; they had +done the ceiling and stripped the walls; the painting was not started +till the second day. How then could it have had three coats? Misery +explained the mystery: he said that for first coating they had an extra +special very fast-drying paint--paint that dried so quickly that they +were able to give the work two coats in one day. For instance, one man +did the window, the other the door: when these were finished both men +did the skirting; by the time the skirting was finished the door and +window were dry enough to second coat; and then, on the following +day--the finishing coat! + +Of course, this extra special quick-drying paint was very expensive, +but the firm did not mind that. They knew that most of their customers +wished to have their work finished as quickly as possible, and their +study was to give satisfaction to the customers. This explanation +satisfied the lady--a poverty-stricken widow making a precarious living +by taking in lodgers--who was the more easily deceived because she +regarded Misery as a very holy man, having seen him preaching in the +street on many occasions. + +There was another job at another boarding-house that Owen and Easton +did--two rooms which had to be painted three coats of white paint and +one of enamel, making four coats altogether. That was what the firm +had contracted to do. As the old paint in these rooms was of a rather +dark shade it was absolutely necessary to give the work three coats +before enamelling it. Misery wanted them to let it go with two, but +Owen pointed out that if they did so it would be such a ghastly mess +that it would never pass. After thinking the matter over for a few +minutes, Misery told them to go on with the third coat of paint. Then +he went downstairs and asked to see the lady of the house. He +explained to her that, in consequence of the old paint being so dark, +he found that it would be necessary, in order to make a good job of it, +to give the work four coats before enamelling it. Of course, they had +agreed for only three, but as they always made a point of doing their +work in a first-class manner rather than not make a good job, they +would give it the extra coat for nothing, but he was sure she would not +wish them to do that. The lady said that she did not want them to work +for nothing, and she wanted it done properly. If it were necessary to +give it an extra coat, they must do so and she would pay for it. How +much would it be? Misery told her. The lady was satisfied, and Misery +was in the seventh heaven. Then he went upstairs again and warned Owen +and Easton to be sure to say, if they were asked, that the work had had +four coats. + +It would not be reasonable to blame Misery or Rushton for not wishing +to do good, honest work--there was no incentive. When they secured a +contract, if they had thought first of making the very best possible +job of it, they would not have made so much profit. The incentive was +not to do the work as well as possible, but to do as little as +possible. The incentive was not to make good work, but to make good +profit. + +The same rule applied to the workers. They could not justly be blamed +for not doing good work--there was no incentive. To do good work +requires time and pains. Most of them would have liked to take time +and pains, because all those who are capable of doing good work find +pleasure and happiness in doing it, and have pride in it when done: but +there was no incentive, unless the certainty of getting the sack could +be called an incentive, for it was a moral certainty that any man who +was caught taking time and pains with his work would be promptly +presented with the order of the boot. But there was plenty of +incentive to hurry and scamp and slobber and botch. + +There was another job at a lodging-house--two rooms to be painted and +papered. The landlord paid for the work, but the tenant had the +privilege of choosing the paper. She could have any pattern she liked +so long as the cost did not exceed one shilling per roll, Rushton's +estimate being for paper of that price. Misery sent her several +patterns of sixpenny papers, marked at a shilling, to choose from, but +she did not fancy any of them, and said that she would come to the shop +to make her selection. So Hunter tore round to the shop in a great +hurry to get there before her. In his haste to dismount, he fell off +his bicycle into the muddy road, and nearly smashed the plate-glass +window with the handle-bar of the machine as he placed it against the +shop front before going in. + +Without waiting to clean the mud off his clothes, he ordered Budd, the +pimply-faced shopman, to get out rolls of all the sixpenny papers they +had, and then they both set to work and altered the price marked upon +them from sixpence to a shilling. Then they got out a number of +shilling papers and altered the price marked upon them, changing it +from a shilling to one and six. + +When the unfortunate woman arrived, Misery was waiting for her with a +benign smile upon his long visage. He showed her all the sixpenny +ones, but she did not like any of them, so after a while Nimrod +suggested that perhaps she would like a paper of a little better +quality, and she could pay the trifling difference out of her own +pocket. Then he showed her the shilling papers that he had marked up +to one and sixpence, and eventually the lady selected one of these and +paid the extra sixpence per roll herself, as Nimrod suggested. There +were fifteen rolls of paper altogether--seven for one room and eight +for the other--so that in addition to the ordinary profit on the sale +of the paper--about two hundred and seventy-five per cent.--the firm +made seven and sixpence on this transaction. They might have done +better out of the job itself if Slyme had not been hanging the paper +piece-work, for, the two rooms being of the same pattern, he could +easily have managed to do them with fourteen rolls; in fact, that was +all he did use, but he cut up and partly destroyed the one that was +over so that he could charge for hanging it. + +Owen was working there at the same time, for the painting of the rooms +was not done before Slyme papered them; the finishing coat was put on +after the paper was hung. He noticed Slyme destroying the paper and, +guessing the reason, asked him how he could reconcile such conduct as +that with his profession of religion. + +Slyme replied that the fact that he was a Christian did not imply that +he never did anything wrong: if he committed a sin, he was a Christian +all the same, and it would be forgiven him for the sake of the Blood. +As for this affair of the paper, it was a matter between himself and +God, and Owen had no right to set himself up as a Judge. + +In addition to all this work, there were a number of funerals. Crass +and Slyme did very well out of it all, working all day white-washing or +painting, and sometimes part of the night painting venetian blinds or +polishing coffins and taking them home, to say nothing of the lifting +in of the corpses and afterwards acting as bearers. + +As time went on, the number of small jobs increased, and as the days +grew longer the men were allowed to put in a greater number of hours. +Most of the firms had some work, but there was never enough to keep all +the men in the town employed at the same time. It worked like this: +Every firm had a certain number of men who were regarded as the regular +hands. When there was any work to do, they got the preference over +strangers or outsiders. When things were busy, outsiders were taken on +temporarily. When the work fell off, these casual hands were the first +to be 'stood still'. If it continued to fall off, the old hands were +also stood still in order of seniority, the older hands being preferred +to strangers--so long, of course, as they were not old in the sense of +being aged or inefficient. + +This kind of thing usually continued all through the spring and summer. +In good years the men of all trades, carpenters, bricklayers, +plasterers, painters and so on, were able to keep almost regularly at +work, except in wet weather. + +The difference between a good and bad spring and summer is that in good +years it is sometimes possible to make a little overtime, and the +periods of unemployment are shorter and less frequent than in bad +years. It is rare even in good years for one of the casual hands to be +employed by one firm for more than one, two or three months without a +break. It is usual for them to put in a month with one firm, then a +fortnight with another, then perhaps six weeks somewhere else, and +often between there are two or three days or even weeks of enforced +idleness. This sort of thing goes on all through spring, summer and +autumn. + + + +Chapter 41 + +The Easter Offering. The Beano Meeting + + +By the beginning of April, Rushton & Co. were again working nine hours +a day, from seven in the morning till five-thirty at night, and after +Easter they started working full time from 6 A.M. till 5.30 P.M., +eleven and a half hours--or, rather, ten hours, for they had to lose +half an hour at breakfast and an hour at dinner. + +Just before Easter several of the men asked Hunter if they might be +allowed to work on Good Friday and Easter Monday, as, they said, they +had had enough holidays during the winter; they had no money to spare +for holiday-making, and they did not wish to lose two days' pay when +there was work to be done. Hunter told them that there was not +sufficient work in to justify him in doing as they requested: things +were getting very slack again, and Mr Rushton had decided to cease work +from Thursday night till Tuesday morning. They were thus prevented +from working on Good Friday, but it is true that not more than one +working man in fifty went to any religious service on that day or on +any other day during the Easter festival. On the contrary, this +festival was the occasion of much cursing and blaspheming on the part +of those whose penniless, poverty-stricken condition it helped to +aggravate by enforcing unprofitable idleness which they lacked the +means to enjoy. + +During these holidays some of the men did little jobs on their own +account and others put in the whole time--including Good Friday and +Easter Sunday--gardening, digging and planting their plots of allotment +ground. + +When Owen arrived home one evening during the week before Easter, +Frankie gave him an envelope which he had brought home from school. It +contained a printed leaflet: + + CHURCH OF THE WHITED SEPULCHRE, + MUGSBOROUGH + + Easter 19-- + +Dear Sir (or Madam), + +In accordance with the usual custom we invite you to join with us in +presenting the Vicar, the Rev. Habbakuk Bosher, with an Easter +Offering, as a token of affection and regard. + + Yours faithfully, + A. Cheeseman } + W. Taylor } Churchwardens + +Mr Bosher's income from various sources connected with the church was +over six hundred pounds a year, or about twelve pounds per week, but as +that sum was evidently insufficient, his admirers had adopted this +device for supplementing it. Frankie said all the boys had one of +these letters and were going to ask their fathers for some money to +give towards the Easter offering. Most of them expected to get +twopence. + +As the boy had evidently set his heart on doing the same as the other +children, Owen gave him the twopence, and they afterwards learned that +the Easter Offering for that year was one hundred and twenty-seven +pounds, which was made up of the amounts collected from the +parishioners by the children, the district visitors and the verger, the +collection at a special Service, and donations from the feeble-minded +old females elsewhere referred to. + +By the end of April nearly all the old hands were back at work, and +several casual hands had also been taken on, the Semi-drunk being one +of the number. In addition to these, Misery had taken on a number of +what he called 'lightweights', men who were not really skilled workmen, +but had picked up sufficient knowledge of the simpler parts of the +trade to be able to get over it passably. These were paid fivepence or +fivepence-halfpenny, and were employed in preference to those who had +served their time, because the latter wanted more money and therefore +were only employed when absolutely necessary. Besides the lightweights +there were a few young fellows called improvers, who were also employed +because they were cheap. + +Crass now acted as colourman, having been appointed possibly because he +knew absolutely nothing about the laws of colour. As most of the work +consisted of small jobs, all the paint and distemper was mixed up at +the shop and sent out ready for use to the various jobs. + +Sawkins or some of the other lightweights generally carried the heavier +lots of colour or scaffolding, but the smaller lots of colour or such +things as a pair of steps or a painter's plank were usually sent by the +boy, whose slender legs had become quite bowed since he had been +engaged helping the other philanthropists to make money for Mr Rushton. + +Crass's work as colourman was simplified, to a certain extent, by the +great number of specially prepared paints and distempers in all +colours, supplied by the manufacturers ready for use. Most of these +new-fangled concoctions were regarded with an eye of suspicion and +dislike by the hands, and Philpot voiced the general opinion about them +one day during a dinner-hour discussion when he said they might appear +to be all right for a time, but they would probably not last, because +they was mostly made of kimicles. + +One of these new-fashioned paints was called 'Petrifying Liquid', and +was used for first-coating decaying stone or plaster work. It was also +supposed to be used for thinning up a certain kind of patent distemper, +but when Misery found out that it was possible to thin the latter with +water, the use of 'Petrifying Liquid' for that purpose was +discontinued. This 'Petrifying Liquid' was a source of much merriment +to the hands. The name was applied to the tea that they made in +buckets on some of the jobs, and also to the four-ale that was supplied +by certain pubs. + +One of the new inventions was regarded with a certain amount of +indignation by the hands: it was a white enamel, and they objected to +it for two reasons--one was because, as Philpot remarked, it dried so +quickly that you had to work like greased lightning; you had to be all +over the door directly you started it. + +The other reason was that, because it dried so quickly, it was +necessary to keep closed the doors and windows of the room where it was +being used, and the smell was so awful that it brought on fits of +dizziness and sometimes vomiting. Needless to say, the fact that it +compelled those who used it to work quickly recommended the stuff to +Misery. + +As for the smell, he did not care about that; he did not have to inhale +the fumes himself. + + + +It was just about this time that Crass, after due consultation with +several of the others, including Philpot, Harlow, Bundy, Slyme, Easton +and the Semi-drunk, decided to call a meeting of the hands for the +purpose of considering the advisability of holding the usual Beano +later on in the summer. The meeting was held in the carpenter's shop +down at the yard one evening at six o'clock, which allowed time for +those interested to attend after leaving work. + +The hands sat on the benches or carpenter's stools, or reclined upon +heaps of shavings. On a pair of tressels in the centre of the workshop +stood a large oak coffin which Crass had just finished polishing. + +When all those who were expected to turn up had arrived, Payne, the +foreman carpenter--the man who made the coffins--was voted to the chair +on the proposition of Crass, seconded by Philpot, and then a solemn +silence ensued, which was broken at last by the chairman, who, in a +lengthy speech, explained the object of the meeting. Possibly with a +laudable desire that there should be no mistake about it, he took the +trouble to explain several times, going over the same ground and +repeating the same words over and over again, whilst the audience +waited in a deathlike and miserable silence for him to leave off. +Payne, however, did not appear to have any intention of leaving off, +for he continued, like a man in a trance, to repeat what he had said +before, seeming to be under the impression that he had to make a +separate explanation to each individual member of the audience. At +last the crowd could stand it no longer, and began to shout 'Hear, +hear' and to bang bits of wood and hammers on the floor and the +benches; and then, after a final repetition of the statement, that the +object of the meeting was to consider the advisability of holding an +outing, or beanfeast, the chairman collapsed on to a carpenter's stool +and wiped the sweat from his forehead. + +Crass then reminded the meeting that the last year's Beano had been an +unqualified success, and for his part he would be very sorry if they +did not have one this year. Last year they had four brakes, and they +went to Tubberton Village. + +It was true that there was nothing much to see at Tubberton, but there +was one thing they could rely on getting there that they could not be +sure of getting for the same money anywhere else, and that was--a good +feed. (Applause.) Just for the sake of getting on with the business, +he would propose that they decide to go to Tubberton, and that a +committee be appointed to make arrangements--about the dinner--with the +landlord of the Queen Elizabeth's Head at that place. + +Philpot seconded the motion, and Payne was about to call for a show of +hands when Harlow rose to a point of order. It appeared to him that +they were getting on a bit too fast. The proper way to do this +business was first to take the feeling of the meeting as to whether +they wished to have a Beano at all, and then, if the meeting was in +favour of it, they could decide where they were to go, and whether they +would have a whole day or only half a day. + +The Semi-drunk said that he didn't care a dreadful expression where +they went: he was willing to abide by the decision of the majority. +(Applause.) It was a matter of indifference to him whether they had a +day, or half a day, or two days; he was agreeable to anything. + +Easton suggested that a special saloon carriage might be engaged, and +they could go and visit Madame Tussaud's Waxworks. He had never been +to that place and had often wished to see it. But Philpot objected +that if they went there, Madame Tussaud's might be unwilling to let +them out again. + +Bundy endorsed the remarks that had fallen from Crass with reference to +Tubberton. He did not care where they went, they would never get such +a good spread for the money as they did last year at the Queen +Elizabeth. (Cheers.) + +The chairman said that he remembered the last Beano very well. They +had half a day--left off work on Saturday at twelve instead of one--so +there was only one hour's wages lost--they went home, had a wash and +changed their clothes, and got up to the Cricketers, where the brakes +was waiting, at one. Then they had the two hours' drive to Tubberton, +stopping on the way for drinks at the Blue Lion, the Warrior's Head, +the Bird in Hand, the Dewdrop Inn and the World Turned Upside Down. +(Applause.) They arrived at the Queen Elizabeth at three-thirty, and +the dinner was ready; and it was one of the finest blow-outs he had +ever had. (Hear, hear.) There was soup, vegetables, roast beef, roast +mutton, lamb and mint sauce, plum duff, Yorkshire, and a lot more. The +landlord of the Elizabeth kept as good a drop of beer as anyone could +wish to drink, and as for the teetotallers, they could have tea, coffee +or ginger beer. + +Having thus made another start, Payne found it very difficult to leave +off, and was proceeding to relate further details of the last Beano +when Harlow again rose up from his heap of shavings and said he wished +to call the chairman to order. (Hear, hear.) What the hell was the +use of all this discussion before they had even decided to have a Beano +at all! Was the meeting in favour of a Beano or not? That was the +question. + +A prolonged and awkward silence followed. Everyone was very +uncomfortable, looking stolidly on the ground or staring straight in +front of them. + +At last Easton broke the silence by suggesting that it would not be a +bad plan if someone was to make a motion that a Beano be held. This +was greeted with a general murmur of 'Hear, hear,' followed by another +awkward pause, and then the chairman asked Easton if he would move a +resolution to that effect. After some hesitation, Easton agreed, and +formally moved: 'That this meeting is in favour of a Beano.' + +The Semi-drunk said that, in order to get on with the business, he +would second the resolution. But meantime, several arguments had +broken out between the advocates of different places, and several men +began to relate anecdotes of previous Beanos. Nearly everyone was +speaking at once and it was some time before the chairman was able to +put the resolution. Finding it impossible to make his voice heard +above the uproar, he began to hammer on the bench with a wooden mallet, +and to shout requests for order, but this only served to increase the +din. Some of them looked at him curiously and wondered what was the +matter with him, but the majority were so interested in their own +arguments that they did not notice him at all. + +Whilst the chairman was trying to get the attention of the meeting in +order to put the question, Bundy had become involved in an argument +with several of the new hands who claimed to know of an even better +place than the Queen Elizabeth, a pub called 'The New Found Out', at +Mirkfield, a few miles further on than Tubberton, and another +individual joined in the dispute, alleging that a house called 'The +Three Loggerheads' at Slushton-cum-Dryditch was the finest place for a +Beano within a hundred miles of Mugsborough. He went there last year +with Pushem and Driver's crowd, and they had roast beef, goose, jam +tarts, mince pies, sardines, blancmange, calves' feet jelly and one +pint for each man was included in the cost of the dinner. In the +middle of the discussion, they noticed that most of the others were +holding up their hands, so to show there was no ill feeling they held +up theirs also and then the chairman declared it was carried +unanimously. + +Bundy said he would like to ask the chairman to read out the resolution +which had just been passed, as he had not caught the words. + +The chairman replied that there was no written resolution. The motion +was just to express the feeling of this meeting as to whether there was +to be an outing or not. + +Bundy said he was only asking a civil question, a point of information: +all he wanted to know was, what was the terms of the resolution? Was +they in favour of the Beano or not? + +The chairman responded that the meeting was unanimously in favour. +(Applause.) + +Harlow said that the next thing to be done was to decide upon the date. +Crass suggested the last Saturday in August. That would give them +plenty of time to pay in. + +Sawkins asked whether it was proposed to have a day or only half a day. +He himself was in favour of the whole day. It would only mean losing a +morning's work. It was hardly worth going at all if they only had half +the day. + +The Semi-drunk remarked that he had just thought of a very good place +to go if they decided to have a change. Three years ago he was working +for Dauber and Botchit and they went to 'The First In and the Last Out' +at Bashford. It was a very small place, but there was a field where +you could have a game of cricket or football, and the dinner was A1 at +Lloyds. There was also a skittle alley attached to the pub and no +charge was made for the use of it. There was a bit of a river there, +and one of the chaps got so drunk that he went orf his onion and jumped +into the water, and when they got him out the village policeman locked +him up, and the next day he was took before the beak and fined two +pounds or a month's hard labour for trying to commit suicide. + +Easton pointed out that there was another way to look at it: supposing +they decided to have the Beano, he supposed it would come to about six +shillings a head. If they had it at the end of August and started +paying in now, say a tanner a week, they would have plenty of time to +make up the amount, but supposing the work fell off and some of them +got the push? + +Crass said that in that case a man could either have his money back or +he could leave it, and continue his payments even if he were working +for some other firm; the fact that he was off from Rushton's would not +prevent him from going to the Beano. + +Harlow proposed that they decide to go to the Queen Elizabeth the same +as last year, and that they have half a day. + +Philpot said that, in order to get on with the business, he would +second the resolution. + +Bundy suggested--as an amendment--that it should be a whole day, +starting from the Cricketers at nine in the morning, and Sawkins said +that, in order to get on with the business, he would second the +amendment. + +One of the new hands said he wished to move another amendment. He +proposed to strike out the Queen Elizabeth and substitute the Three +Loggerheads. + +The Chairman--after a pause--inquired if there were any seconder to +this, and the Semi-drunk said that, although he did not care much where +they went, still, to get on with the business, he would second the +amendment, although for his own part he would prefer to go to the +'First In and Last Out' at Bashford. + +The new hand offered to withdraw his suggestion re the Three +Loggerheads in favour of the Semi-drunks proposition, but the latter +said it didn't matter; it could go as it was. + +As it was getting rather late, several men went home, and cries of 'Put +the question' began to be heard on all sides; the chairman accordingly +was proceeding to put Harlow's proposition when the new hand +interrupted him by pointing out that it was his duty as chairman to put +the amendments first. This produced another long discussion, in the +course of which a very tall, thin man who had a harsh, metallic voice +gave a long rambling lecture about the rules of order and the conduct +of public meetings. He spoke very slowly and deliberately, using very +long words and dealing with the subject in an exhaustive manner. A +resolution was a resolution, and an amendment was an amendment; then +there was what was called an amendment to an amendment; the procedure +of the House of Commons differed very materially from that of the House +of Lords--and so on. + +This man kept on talking for about ten minutes, and might have +continued for ten hours if he had not been rudely interrupted by +Harlow, who said that it seemed to him that they were likely to stay +there all night if they went on like they were going. He wanted his +tea, and he would also like to get a few hours' sleep before having to +resume work in the morning. He was getting about sick of all this +talk. (Hear, hear.) In order to get on with the business, he would +withdraw his resolution if the others would withdraw their amendments. +If they would agree to do this, he would then propose another +resolution which--if carried--would meet all the requirements of the +case. (Applause.) + +The man with the metallic voice observed that it was not necessary to +ask the consent of those who had moved amendments: if the original +proposition was withdrawed, all the amendments fell to the ground. + +'Last year,' observed Crass, 'when we was goin' out of the room after +we'd finished our dinner at the Queen Elizabeth, the landlord pointed +to the table and said, "There's enough left over for you all to 'ave +another lot."' (Cheers.) + +Harlow said that he would move that it be held on the last Saturday in +August; that it be for half a day, starting at one o'clock so that they +could work up till twelve, which would mean that they would only have +to lose one hour's pay: that they go to the same place as last +year--the Queen Elizabeth. (Hear, hear.) That the same committee that +acted last year--Crass and Bundy--be appointed to make all the +arrangements and collect the subscriptions. (Applause.) + +The tall man observed that this was what was called a compound +resolution, and was proceeding to explain further when the chairman +exclaimed that it did not matter a dam' what it was called--would +anyone second it? The Semi-drunk said that he would--in order to get +on with the business. + +Bundy moved, and Sawkins seconded, as an amendment, that it should be a +whole day. + +The new hand moved to substitute the Loggerheads for the Queen +Elizabeth. + +Easton proposed to substitute Madame Tussaud's Waxworks for the Queen +Elizabeth. He said he moved this just to test the feeling of the +meeting. + +Harlow pointed out that it would cost at least a pound a head to defray +the expenses of such a trip. The railway fares, tram fares in London, +meals--for it would be necessary to have a whole day--and other +incidental expenses; to say nothing of the loss of wages. It would not +be possible for any of them to save the necessary amount during the +next four months. (Hear, hear.) + +Philpot repeated his warning as to the danger of visiting Madame +Tussaud's. He was certain that if she once got them in there she would +never let them out again. He had no desire to pass the rest of his +life as an image in a museum. + +One of the new hands--a man with a red tie--said that they would look +well, after having been soaked for a month or two in petrifying liquid, +chained up in the Chamber of Horrors with labels round their +necks--'Specimens of Liberal and Conservative upholders of the +Capitalist System, 20 century'. + +Crass protested against the introduction of politics into that meeting. +(Hear, hear.) The remarks of the last speakers were most uncalled-for. + +Easton said that he would withdraw his amendment. + +Acting under the directions of the man with the metallic voice, the +chairman now proceeded to put the amendment to the vote. Bundy's +proposal that it should be a whole day was defeated, only himself, +Sawkins and the Semi-drunk being in favour. The motion to substitute +the Loggerheads for the Queen Elizabeth was also defeated, and the +compound resolution proposed by Harlow was then carried nem. con. + +Philpot now proposed a hearty vote of thanks to the chairman for the +very able manner in which he had conducted the meeting. When this had +been unanimously agreed to, the Semi-drunk moved a similar tribute of +gratitude to Crass for his services to the cause and the meeting +dispersed. + + + +Chapter 42 + +June + + +During the early part of May the weather was exceptionally bad, with +bitterly cold winds. Rain fell nearly every day, covering the roads +with a slush that penetrated the rotten leather of the cheap or +second-hand boots worn by the workmen. This weather had the effect of +stopping nearly all outside work, and also caused a lot of illness, for +those who were so fortunate as to have inside jobs frequently got wet +through on their way to work in the morning and had to work all day in +damp clothing, and with their boots saturated with water. It was also +a source of trouble to those of the men who had allotments, because if +it had been fine they would have been able to do something to their +gardens while they were out of work. + +Newman had not succeeded in getting a job at the trade since he came +out of prison, but he tried to make a little money by hawking bananas. +Philpot--when he was at work--used often to buy a tanner's or a bob's +worth from him and give them to Mrs Linden's children. On Saturdays +Old Joe used to waylay these children and buy them bags of cakes at the +bakers. One week when he knew that Mrs Linden had not had much work to +do, he devised a very cunning scheme to help her. He had been working +with Slyme, who was papering a large boarded ceiling in a shop. It had +to be covered with unbleached calico before it could be papered and +when the work was done there were a number of narrow pieces of calico +left over. These he collected and tore into strips about six inches +wide which he took round to Mrs Linden, and asked her to sew them +together, end to end, so as to make one long strip: then this long +strip had to be cut into four pieces of equal length and the edges sewn +together in such a manner that it would form a long tube. Philpot told +her that it was required for some work that Rushton's were doing, and +said he had undertaken to get the sewing done. The firm would have to +pay for it, so she could charge a good price. + +'You see,' he said with a wink, 'this is one of those jobs where we +gets a chance to get some of our own back.' + +Mary thought it was rather a strange sort of job, but she did as +Philpot directed and when he came for the stuff and asked how much it +was she said threepence: it had only taken about half an hour. Philpot +ridiculed this: it was not nearly enough. THEY were not supposed to +know how long it took: it ought to be a bob at the very least. So, +after some hesitation she made out a bill for that amount on a +half-sheet of note-paper. He brought her the money the next Saturday +afternoon and went off chuckling to himself over the success of the +scheme. It did not occur to him until the next day that he might just +as well have got her to make him an apron or two: and when he did think +of this he said that after all it didn't matter, because if he had done +that it would have been necessary to buy new calico, and anyhow, it +could be done some other time. + +Newman did not make his fortune out of the bananas--seldom more than +two shillings a day--and consequently he was very glad when Philpot +called at his house one evening and told him there was a chance of a +job at Rushton's. Newman accordingly went to the yard the next +morning, taking his apron and blouse and his bag of tools with him, +ready to start work. He got there at about quarter to six and was +waiting outside when Hunter arrived. The latter was secretly very glad +to see him, for there was a rush of work in and they were short of men. +He did not let this appear, of course, but hesitated for a few minutes +when Newman repeated the usual formula: 'Any chance of a job, sir?' + +'We wasn't at all satisfied with you last time you was on, you know,' +said Misery. 'Still, I don't mind giving you another chance. But if +you want to hold your job you'll have to move yourself a bit quicker +than you did before.' + +Towards the end of the month things began to improve all round. The +weather became finer and more settled. As time went on the improvement +was maintained and nearly everyone was employed. Rushton's were so busy +that they took on several other old hands who had been sacked the +previous year for being too slow. + +Thanks to the influence of Crass, Easton was now regarded as one of the +regular hands. He had recently resumed the practice of spending some +of his evenings at the Cricketers. It is probable that even if it had +not been for his friendship with Crass, he would still have continued +to frequent the public house, for things were not very comfortable at +home. Somehow or other, Ruth and he seemed to be always quarrelling, +and he was satisfied that it was not always his fault. Sometimes, +after the day's work was over he would go home resolved to be good +friends with her: he would plan on his way homewards to suggest to her +that they should have their tea and then go out for a walk with the +child. Once or twice she agreed, but on each occasion, they quarrelled +before they got home again. So after a time he gave up trying to be +friends with her and went out by himself every evening as soon as he +had had his tea. + +Mary Linden, who was still lodging with them, could not help perceiving +their unhappiness: she frequently noticed that Ruth's eyes were red and +swollen as if with crying, and she gently sought to gain her +confidence, but without success. On one occasion when Mary was trying +to advise her, Ruth burst out into a terrible fit of weeping, but she +would not say what was the cause--except that her head was aching--she +was not well, that was all. + +Sometimes Easton passed the evening at the Cricketers but frequently he +went over to the allotments, where Harlow had a plot of ground. Harlow +used to get up about four o'clock in the morning and put in an hour or +so at his garden before going to work; and every evening as soon as he +had finished tea he used to go there again and work till it was dark. +Sometimes he did not go home to tea at all, but went straight from work +to the garden, and his children used to bring his tea to him there in a +glass bottle, with something to eat in a little basket. He had four +children, none of whom were yet old enough to go to work, and as may be +imagined, he found it a pretty hard struggle to live. He was not a +teetotaller, but as he often remarked, 'what the publicans got from him +wouldn't make them very fat', for he often went for weeks together +without tasting the stuff, except a glass or two with the Sunday +dinner, which he did not regard as an unnecessary expense, because it +was almost as cheap as tea or coffee. + +Fortunately his wife was a good needlewoman, and as sober and +industrious as himself; by dint of slaving incessantly from morning +till night she managed to keep her home fairly comfortable and the +children clean and decently dressed; they always looked respectable, +although they did not always have enough proper food to eat. They +looked so respectable that none of the 'visiting ladies' ever regarded +them as deserving cases. + +Harlow paid fifteen shillings a year for his plot of ground, and +although it meant a lot of hard work it was also a source of pleasure +and some profit. He generally made a few shillings out of the flowers, +besides having enough potatoes and other vegetables to last them nearly +all the year. + +Sometimes Easton went over to the allotments and lent Harlow a hand +with this gardening work, but whether he went there or to the +Cricketers, he usually returned home about half past nine, and then +went straight to bed, often without speaking a single word to Ruth, who +for her part seldom spoke to him except to answer something he said, or +to ask some necessary question. At first, Easton used to think that it +was all because of the way he had behaved to her in the public house, +but when he apologized--as he did several times--and begged her to +forgive him and forget about it, she always said it was all right; +there was nothing to forgive. Then, after a time, he began to think it +was on account of their poverty and the loss of their home, for nearly +all their furniture had been sold during the last winter. But whenever +he talked of trying to buy some more things to make the place +comfortable again, she did not appear to take any interest: the house +was neat enough as it was: they could manage very well, she said, +indifferently. + +One evening, about the middle of June, when he had been over to the +allotments, Easton brought her home a bunch of flowers that Harlow had +given him--some red and white roses and some s. When he came in, +Ruth was packing his food basket for the next day. The baby was asleep +in its cot on the floor near the window. Although it was nearly nine +o'clock the lamp had not yet been lighted and the mournful twilight +that entered the room through the open window increased the desolation +of its appearance. The fire had burnt itself out and the grate was +filled with ashes. On the hearth was an old rug made of jute that had +once been printed in bright colours which had faded away till the whole +surface had become almost uniformly drab, showing scarcely any trace of +the original pattern. The rest of the floor was bare except for two or +three small pieces of old carpet that Ruth had bought for a few pence +at different times at some inferior second-hand shop. The chairs and +the table were almost the only things that were left of the original +furniture of the room, and except for three or four plates of different +patterns and sizes and a few cups and saucers, the shelves of the +dresser were bare. + +The stillness of the atmosphere was disturbed only by the occasional +sound of the wheels of a passing vehicle and the strangely distinct +voices of some children who were playing in the street. + +'I've brought you these,' said Easton, offering her the flowers. 'I +thought you'd like them. I got them from Harlow. You know I've been +helping him a little with his garden.' + +At first he thought she did not want to take them. She was standing at +the table with her back to the window, so that he was unable to see the +expression of her face, and she hesitated for a moment before she +faltered out some words of thanks and took the flowers, which she put +down on the table almost as soon as she touched them. + +Offended at what he considered her contemptuous indifference, Easton +made no further attempt at conversation but went into the scullery to +wash his hands, and then went up to bed. + +Downstairs, for a long time after he was gone, Ruth sat alone by the +fireless grate, in the silence and the gathering shadows, holding the +bunch of flowers in her hand, living over again the events of the last +year, and consumed with an agony of remorse. + +The presence of Mary Linden and the two children in the house probably +saved Ruth from being more unhappy than she was. Little Elsie had made +an arrangement with her to be allowed to take the baby out for walks, +and in return Ruth did Elsie's housework. As for Mary, she had not +much time to do anything but sew, almost the only relaxation she knew +being when she took the work home, and on Sunday, which she usually +devoted to a general clean-up of the room, and to mending the +children's clothes. Sometimes on Sunday evening she used to go with +Ruth and the children to see Mrs Owen, who, although she was not ill +enough to stay in bed, seldom went out of the house. She had never +really recovered from the attack of illness which was brought on by her +work at the boarding house. The doctor had been to see her once or +twice and had prescribed--rest. She was to lie down as much as +possible, not to do any heavy work--not to carry or lift any heavy +articles, scrub floors, make beds, or anything of that sort: and she +was to take plenty of nourishing food, beef tea, chicken, a little wine +and so on. He did not suggest a trip round the world in a steam yacht +or a visit to Switzerland--perhaps he thought they might not be able to +afford it. Sometimes she was so ill that she had to observe one at +least of the doctor's instructions--to lie down: and then she would +worry and fret because she was not able to do the housework and because +Owen had to prepare his own tea when he came home at night. On one of +these occasions it would have been necessary for Owen to stay at home +from work if it had not been for Mrs Easton, who came for several days +in succession to look after her and attend to the house. + +Fortunately, Owen's health was better since the weather had become +warmer. For a long time after the attack of haemorrhage he had while +writing the show-card he used to dread going to sleep at night for fear +it should recur. He had heard of people dying in their sleep from that +cause. But this terror gradually left him. Nora knew nothing of what +occurred that night: to have told her would have done no good, but on +the contrary would have caused her a lot of useless anxiety. Sometimes +he doubted whether it was right not to tell her, but as time went by +and his health continued to improve he was glad he had said nothing +about it. + +Frankie had lately resumed his athletic exercises with the flat iron: +his strength was returning since Owen had been working regularly, +because he had been having his porridge and milk again and also some +Parrish's Food which a chemist at Windley was selling large bottles of +for a shilling. He used to have what he called a 'party' two or three +times a week with Elsie, Charley and Easton's baby as the guests. +Sometimes, if Mrs Owen were not well, Elsie used to stay in with her +after tea and do some housework while the boys went out to play, but +more frequently the four children used to go together to the park to +play or sail boats on the lake. Once one of the boats was becalmed +about a couple of yards from shore and while trying to reach it with a +stick Frankie fell into the water, and when Charley tried to drag him +out he fell in also. Elsie put the baby down on the bank and seized +hold of Charley and while she was trying to get him out, the baby began +rolling down, and would probably have tumbled in as well if a man who +happened to be passing by had not rushed up in time to prevent it. +Fortunately the water at that place was only about two feet deep, so +the boys were not much the worse for their ducking. They returned home +wet through, smothered with mud, and feeling very important, like boys +who had distinguished themselves. + +After this, whenever she could manage to spare the time, Ruth Easton +used to go with the children to the park. There was a kind of +summer-house near the shore of the lake, only a few feet away from the +water's edge, surrounded and shaded by trees, whose branches arched +over the path and drooped down to the surface of the water. While the +children played Ruth used to sit in this arbour and sew, but often her +work was neglected and forgotten as she gazed pensively at the water, +which just there looked very still, and dark, and deep, for it was +sheltered from the wind and over-shadowed by the trees that lined the +banks at the end of the lake. + + + +Sometimes, if it happened to be raining, instead of going out the +children used to have some games in the house. On one such occasion +Frankie produced the flat iron and went through the exercise, and +Charley had a go as well. But although he was slightly older and +taller than Frankie he could not lift the iron so often or hold it out +so long as the other, a failure that Frankie attributed to the fact +that Charley had too much tea and bread and butter instead of porridge +and milk and Parrish's Food. Charley was so upset about his lack of +strength that he arranged with Frankie to come home with him the next +day after school to see his mother about it. Mrs Linden had a flat +iron, so they gave a demonstration of their respective powers before +her. Mrs Easton being also present, by request, because Frankie said +that the diet in question was suitable for babies as well as big +children. He had been brought up on it ever since he could remember, +and it was almost as cheap as bread and butter and tea. + +The result of the exhibition was that Mrs Linden promised to make +porridge for Charley and Elsie whenever she could spare the time, and +Mrs Easton said she would try it for the baby also. + + + +Chapter 43 + +The Good Old Summer-time + + +All through the summer the crowd of ragged-trousered philanthropists +continued to toil and sweat at their noble and unselfish task of making +money for Mr Rushton. + +Painting the outsides of houses and shops, washing off and distempering +ceilings, stripping old paper off walls, painting and papering rooms +and staircases, building new rooms or other additions to old houses or +business premises, digging up old drains, repairing leaky roofs and +broken windows. + +Their zeal and enthusiasm in the good cause was unbounded. They were +supposed to start work at six o'clock, but most of them were usually to +be found waiting outside the job at about a quarter to that hour, +sitting on the kerbstones or the doorstep. + +Their operations extended all over the town: at all hours of the day +they were to be seen either going or returning from 'jobs', carrying +ladders, planks, pots of paint, pails of whitewash, earthenware, +chimney pots, drainpipes, lengths of guttering, closet pans, grates, +bundles of wallpaper, buckets of paste, sacks of cement, and loads of +bricks and mortar. Quite a common spectacle--for gods and men--was a +procession consisting of a handcart loaded up with such materials being +pushed or dragged through the public streets by about half a dozen of +these Imperialists in broken boots and with battered, stained, +discoloured bowler hats, or caps splashed with paint and whitewash; +their stand-up collars dirty, limp and crumpled, and their rotten +second-hand misfit clothing saturated with sweat and plastered with +mortar. + +Even the assistants in the grocers' and drapers' shops laughed and +ridiculed and pointed the finger of scorn at them as they passed. + +The superior classes--those who do nothing--regarded them as a sort of +lower animals. A letter appeared in the Obscurer one week from one of +these well-dressed loafers, complaining of the annoyance caused to the +better-class visitors by workmen walking on the pavement as they passed +along the Grand Parade in the evening on their way home from work, and +suggesting that they should walk in the roadway. When they heard of +the letter a lot of the workmen adopted the suggestion and walked in +the road so as to avoid contaminating the idlers. + +This letter was followed by others of a somewhat similar kind, and one +or two written in a patronizing strain in defence of the working +classes by persons who evidently knew nothing about them. There was +also a letter from an individual who signed himself 'Morpheus' +complaining that he was often awakened out of his beauty sleep in the +middle of the night by the clattering noise of the workmen's boots as +they passed his house on their way to work in the morning. 'Morpheus' +wrote that not only did they make a dreadful noise with their horrible +iron-clad boots, but they were in the habit of coughing and spitting a +great deal, which was very unpleasant to hear, and they conversed in +loud tones. Sometimes their conversation was not at all edifying, for +it consisted largely of bad language, which 'Morpheus' assumed to be +attributable to the fact that they were out of temper because they had +to rise so early. + +As a rule they worked till half-past five in the evening, and by the +time they reached home it was six o'clock. When they had taken their +evening meal and had a wash it was nearly eight: about nine most of +them went to bed so as to be able to get up about half past four the +next morning to make a cup of tea before leaving home at half past five +to go to work again. Frequently it happened that they had to leave +home earlier than this, because their 'job' was more than half an +hour's walk away. It did not matter how far away the 'job' was from +the shop, the men had to walk to and fro in their own time, for Trades +Union rules were a dead letter in Mugsborough. There were no tram +fares or train fares or walking time allowed for the likes of them. + +Ninety-nine out of every hundred of them did not believe in such things +as those: they had much more sense than to join Trades Unions: on the +contrary, they believed in placing themselves entirely at the mercy of +their good, kind Liberal and Tory masters. + +Very frequently it happened, when only a few men were working together, +that it was not convenient to make tea for breakfast or dinner, and +then some of them brought tea with them ready made in bottles and drank +it cold; but most of them went to the nearest pub and ate their food +there with a glass of beer. Even those who would rather have had tea +or coffee had beer, because if they went to a temperance restaurant or +coffee tavern it generally happened that they were not treated very +civilly unless they bought something to eat as well as to drink, and +the tea at such places was really dearer than beer, and the latter was +certainly quite as good to drink as the stewed tea or the liquid mud +that was sold as coffee at cheap 'Workmen's' Eating Houses. + +There were some who were--as they thought--exceptionally lucky: the +firms they worked for were busy enough to let them work two hours' +overtime every night--till half past seven--without stopping for tea. +Most of these arrived home about eight, completely flattened out. Then +they had some tea and a wash and before they knew where they were it +was about half past nine. Then they went to sleep again till half past +four or five the next morning. + +They were usually so tired when they got home at night that they never +had any inclination for study or any kind of self-improvement, even if +they had had the time. They had plenty of time to study during the +winter: and their favourite subject then was, how to preserve +themselves from starving to death. + +This overtime, however, was the exception, for although in former years +it had been the almost invariable rule to work till half past seven in +summer, most of the firms now made a practice of ceasing work at +five-thirty. The revolution which had taken place in this matter was a +favourite topic of conversation amongst the men, who spoke regretfully +of the glorious past, when things were busy, and they used to work +fifteen, sixteen and even eighteen hours a day. But nowadays there +were nearly as many chaps out of work in the summer as in the winter. +They used to discuss the causes of the change. One was, of course, the +fact that there was not so much building going on as formerly, and +another was the speeding up and slave-driving, and the manner in which +the work was now done, or rather scamped. As old Philpot said, he +could remember the time, when he was a nipper, when such a 'job' as +that at 'The Cave' would have lasted at least six months, and they +would have had more hands on it too! But it would have been done +properly, not messed up like that was: all the woodwork would have been +rubbed down with pumice stone and water: all the knots cut out and the +holes properly filled up, and the work properly rubbed down with +glass-paper between every coat. But nowadays the only place you'd see +a bit of pumice stone was in a glass case in a museum, with a label on +it. + + 'Pumice Stone: formerly used by house-painters.' + +Most of them spoke of those bygone times with poignant regret, but +there were a few--generally fellows who had been contaminated by +contact with Socialists or whose characters had been warped and +degraded by the perusal of Socialist literature--who said that they did +not desire to work overtime at all--ten hours a day were quite enough +for them--in fact they would rather do only eight. What they wanted, +they said, was not more work, but more grub, more clothes, more +leisure, more pleasure and better homes. They wanted to be able to go +for country walks or bicycle rides, to go out fishing or to go to the +seaside and bathe and lie on the beach and so forth. But these were +only a very few; there were not many so selfish as this. The majority +desired nothing but to be allowed to work, and as for their children, +why, 'what was good enough for themselves oughter be good enough for +the kids'. + +They often said that such things as leisure, culture, pleasure and the +benefits of civilization were never intended for 'the likes of us'. + +They did not--all--actually say this, but that was what their conduct +amounted to; for they not only refused to help to bring about a better +state of things for their children, but they ridiculed and opposed and +cursed and abused those who were trying to do it for them. The foulest +words that came out of their mouths were directed against the men of +their own class in the House of Commons--the Labour Members--and +especially the Socialists, whom they spoke of as fellows who were too +bloody lazy to work for a living, and who wanted the working classes to +keep them. + +Some of them said that they did not believe in helping their children +to become anything better than their parents had been because in such +cases the children, when they grew up, 'looked down' upon and were +ashamed of their fathers and mothers! They seemed to think that if +they loved and did their duty to their children, the probability was +that the children would prove ungrateful: as if even if that were true, +it would be any excuse for their indifference. + +Another cause of the shortage of work was the intrusion into the trade +of so many outsiders: fellows like Sawkins and the other lightweights. +Whatever other causes there were, there could be no doubt that the +hurrying and scamping was a very real one. Every 'job' had to be done +at once! as if it were a matter of life or death! It must be finished +by a certain time. If the 'job' was at an empty house, Misery's yarn +was that it was let! the people were coming in at the end of the week! +therefore everything must be finished by Wednesday night. All the +ceilings had to be washed off, the walls stripped and repapered, and +two coats of paint inside and outside the house. New drains were to be +put in, and all broken windows and locks and broken plaster repaired. +A number of men--usually about half as many as there should have +been--would be sent to do the work, and one man was put in charge of +the 'job'. These sub-foremen or 'coddies' knew that if they 'made +their jobs pay' they would be put in charge of others and be kept on in +preference to other men as long as the firm had any work; so they +helped Misery to scheme and scamp the work and watched and drove the +men under their charge; and these latter poor wretches, knowing that +their only chance of retaining their employment was to 'tear into it', +tore into it like so many maniacs. Instead of cleaning any parts of +the woodwork that were greasy or very dirty, they brushed them over +with a coat of spirit varnish before painting to make sure that the +paint would dry: places where the plaster of the walls was damaged were +repaired with what was humorously called 'garden cement'--which was the +technical term for dirt out of the garden--and the surface was skimmed +over with proper material. Ceilings that were not very dirty were not +washed off, but dusted, and lightly gone over with a thin coat of +whitewash. The old paper was often left upon the walls of rooms that +were supposed to be stripped before being repapered, and to conceal +this the joints of the old paper were rubbed down so that they should +not be perceptible through the new paper. As far as possible, Misery +and the sub-foreman avoided doing the work the customers paid for, and +even what little they did was hurried over anyhow. + + + +A reign of terror--the terror of the sack--prevailed on all the 'jobs', +which were carried on to the accompaniment of a series of alarums and +excursions: no man felt safe for a moment: at the most unexpected times +Misery would arrive and rush like a whirlwind all over the 'job'. If +he happened to find a man having a spell the culprit was immediately +discharged, but he did not get the opportunity of doing this very often +for everybody was too terrified to leave off working even for a few +minutes' rest. + +From the moment of Hunter's arrival until his departure, a state of +panic, hurry, scurry and turmoil reigned. His strident voice rang +through the house as he bellowed out to them to 'Rouse themselves! Get +it done! Smear it on anyhow! Tar it over! We've got another job to +start when you've done this!' + +Occasionally, just to keep the others up to concert pitch, he used to +sack one of the men for being too slow. They all trembled before him +and ran about whenever he spoke to or called them, because they knew +that there were always a lot of other men out of work who would be +willing and eager to fill their places if they got the sack. + +Although it was now summer, and the Distress Committee and all the +other committees had suspended operations, there was still always a +large number of men hanging about the vicinity of the Fountain on the +Parade--The Wage Slave Market. When men finished up for the firm they +were working for they usually made for that place. Any master in want +of a wage slave for a few hours, days or weeks could always buy one +there. The men knew this and they also knew that if they got the sack +from one firm it was no easy matter to get another job, and that was +why they were terrified. + +When Misery was gone--to repeat the same performance at some other +job--the sub-foreman would have a crawl round to see how the chaps were +getting on: to find out if they had used up all their paint yet, or to +bring them some putty so that they should not have to leave their work +to go to get anything themselves: and then very often Rushton himself +would come and stalk quietly about the house or stand silently behind +the men, watching them as they worked. He seldom spoke to anyone, but +just stood there like a graven image, or walked about like a dumb +animal--a pig, as the men used to say. This individual had a very +exalted idea of his own importance and dignity. One man got the sack +for presuming to stop him in the street to ask some questions about +some work that was being done. + +Misery went round to all the jobs the next day and told all the +'coddies' to tell all the hands that they were never to speak to Mr +Rushton if they met him in the street, and the following Saturday the +man who had so offended was given his back day, ostensibly because +there was nothing for him to do, but really for the reason stated above. + +There was one job, the outside of a large house that stood on elevated +ground overlooking the town. The men who were working there were even +more than usually uncomfortable, for it was said that Rushton used to +sit in his office and watch them through a telescope. + +Sometimes, when it was really necessary to get a job done by a certain +time, they had to work late, perhaps till eight or nine o'clock. No +time was allowed for tea, but some of them brought sufficient food with +them in the morning to enable them to have a little about six o'clock +in the evening. Others arranged for their children to bring them some +tea from home. As a rule, they partook of this without stopping work: +they had it on the floor beside them and ate and drank and worked at +the same time--a paint-brushful of white lead in one hand, and a piece +of bread and margarine in the other. On some jobs, if the 'coddy' +happened to be a decent sort, they posted a sentry to look out for +Hunter or Rushton while the others knocked off for a few minutes to +snatch a mouthful of grub; but it was not safe always to do this, for +there was often some crawling sneak with an ambition to become a +'coddy' who would not scruple to curry favour with Misery by reporting +the crime. + +As an additional precaution against the possibility of any of the men +idling or wasting their time, each one was given a time-sheet on which +he was required to account for every minute of the day. The form of +these sheets vary slightly with different firms: that of Rushton & Co., +was as shown. + + TIME SHEET + OF WORK DONE BY IN THE EMPLOY OF + RUSHTON & CO + BUILDERS & DECORATORS : MUGSBOROUGH + + NO SMOKING OR INTOXICANTS ALLOWED DURING WORKING HOURS + + EACH PIECE OF WORK MUST BE FULLY DESCRIBED, WHAT IT WAS, AND HOW LONG + IT TOOK TO DO. + + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ + | | Time When | Time When | | + | Where Working | Started | Finished | Hours | What Doing + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ Sat + | | | | | + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ Mon + | | | | | + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ Tues + | | | | | + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ Wed + | | | | | + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ Thur + | | | | | + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ Fri + | | | | | + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ + | | Total Hours | | + -----+---------------+-----------+-----------+-------+------------ + + +One Monday morning Misery gave each of the sub-foremen an envelope +containing one of the firm's memorandum forms. Crass opened his and +found the following: + +Crass + +When you are on a job with men under you, check and initial their +time-sheets every night. + +If they are called away and sent to some other job, or stood off, check +and initial their time-sheets as they leave your job. + +Any man coming on your job during the day, you must take note of the +exact time of his arrival, and see that his sheet is charged right. + +Any man who is slow or lazy, or any man that you notice talking more +than is necessary during working hours, you must report him to Mr +Hunter. We expect you and the other foremen to help us to carry out +these rules, AND ANY INFORMATION GIVEN US ABOUT ANY MAN IS TREATED IN +CONFIDENCE. + +Rushton & Co. + +Note: This applies to all men of all trades who come on the jobs of +which you are the foreman. + + + +Every week the time-sheets were scrutinized, and every now and then a +man would be 'had up on the carpet' in the office before Rushton and +Misery, and interrogated as to why he had taken fifteen hours to do ten +hours work? In the event of the accused being unable to give a +satisfactory explanation of his conduct he was usually sacked on the +spot. + +Misery was frequently called 'up on the carpet' himself. + +If he made a mistake in figuring out a 'job', and gave in too high a +tender for it, so that the firm did not get the work, Rushton grumbled. +If the price was so low that there was not enough profit, Rushton was +very unpleasant about it, and whenever it happened that there was not +only no profit but an actual loss, Rushton created such a terrible +disturbance that Misery was nearly frightened to death and used to get +on his bicycle and rush off to the nearest 'job' and howl and bellow at +the 'chaps' to get it done. + +All the time the capabilities of the men--especially with regard to +speed--were carefully watched and noted: and whenever there was a +slackness of work and it was necessary to discharge some hands those +that were slow or took too much pains were weeded out: this of course +was known to the men and it had the desired effect upon them. + +In justice to Rushton and Hunter, it must be remembered that there was +a certain amount of excuse for all this driving and cheating, because +they had to compete with all the other firms, who conducted their +business in precisely the same way. It was not their fault, but the +fault of the system. + +A dozen firms tendered for every 'job', and of course the lowest tender +usually obtained the work. Knowing this, they all cut the price down +to the lowest possible figure and the workmen had to suffer. + +The trouble was that there were too many 'masters'. It would have been +far better for the workmen if nine out of every ten of the employers +had never started business. Then the others would have been able to +get a better price for their work, and the men might have had better +wages and conditions. The hands, however, made no such allowances or +excuses as these for Misery and Rushton. They never thought or spoke +of them except with hatred and curses. But whenever either of them +came to the 'job' the 'coddies' cringed and grovelled before them, +greeting them with disgustingly servile salutations, plentifully +interspersed with the word 'Sir', greetings which were frequently +either ignored altogether or answered with an inarticulate grunt. They +said 'Sir' at nearly every second word: it made one feel sick to hear +them because it was not courtesy: they were never courteous to each +other, it was simply abject servility and self-contempt. + +One of the results of all the frenzied hurrying was that every now and +then there was an accident: somebody got hurt: and it was strange that +accidents were not more frequent, considering the risks that were +taken. When they happened to be working on ladders in busy streets +they were not often allowed to have anyone to stand at the foot, and +the consequence was that all sorts and conditions of people came into +violent collision with the bottoms of the ladders. Small boys playing +in the reckless manner characteristic of their years rushed up against +them. Errand boys, absorbed in the perusal of penny instalments of the +adventures of Claude Duval, and carrying large baskets of +green-groceries, wandered into them. Blind men fell foul of them. +Adventurous schoolboys climbed up them. People with large feet became +entangled in them. Fat persons of both sexes who thought it unlucky to +walk underneath, tried to negotiate the narrow strip of pavement +between the foot of the ladder and the kerb, and in their passage +knocked up against the ladder and sometimes fell into the road. +Nursemaids wheeling perambulators--lolling over the handle, which they +usually held with their left hands, the right holding a copy of Orange +Blossoms or some halfpenny paper, and so interested in the story of the +Marquis of Lymejuice--a young man of noble presence and fabulous +wealth, with a drooping golden moustache and very long legs, who, +notwithstanding the diabolical machinations of Lady Sibyl Malvoise, who +loves him as well as a woman with a name like that is capable of loving +anyone, is determined to wed none other than the scullery-maid at the +Village Inn--inevitably bashed the perambulators into the ladders. +Even when the girls were not reading they nearly always ran into the +ladders, which seemed to possess a magnetic attraction for +perambulators and go-carts of all kinds, whether propelled by nurses or +mothers. Sometimes they would advance very cautiously towards the +ladder: then, when they got very near, hesitate a little whether to go +under or run the risk of falling into the street by essaying the narrow +passage: then they would get very close up to the foot of the ladder, +and dodge and dance about, and give the cart little pushes from side to +side, until at last the magnetic influence exerted itself and the +perambulator crashed into the ladder, perhaps at the very moment that +the man at the top was stretching out to do some part of the work +almost beyond his reach. + +Once Harlow had just started painting some rainpipes from the top of a +40-ft ladder when one of several small boys who were playing in the +street ran violently against the foot. Harlow was so startled that he +dropped his brushes and clutched wildly at the ladder, which turned +completely round and slid about six feet along the parapet into the +angle of the wall, with Harlow hanging beneath by his hands. The paint +pot was hanging by a hook from one of the rungs, and the jerk scattered +the brown paint it contained all over Harlow and all over the brickwork +of the front of the house. He managed to descend safely by clasping +his legs round the sides of the ladder and sliding down. When Misery +came there was a row about what he called carelessness. And the next +day Harlow had to wear his Sunday trousers to work. + +On another occasion they were painting the outside of a house called +'Gothic Lodge'. At one corner it had a tower surmounted by a spire or +steeple, and this steeple terminated with an ornamental wrought-iron +pinnacle which had to be painted. The ladder they had was not quite +long enough, and besides that, as it had to stand in a sort of a +courtyard at the base of the tower, it was impossible to slant it +sufficiently: instead of lying along the roof of the steeple, it was +sticking up in the air. + +When Easton went up to paint the pinnacle he had to stand on almost the +very top rung of the ladder, to be exact, the third from the top, and +lean over to steady himself by holding on to the pinnacle with his left +hand while he used the brush with his right. As it was only about +twenty minutes' work there were two men to hold the foot of the ladder. + +It was cheaper to do it this way than to rig up a proper scaffold, +which would have entailed perhaps two hours' work for two or three men. +Of course it was very dangerous, but that did not matter at all, +because even if the man fell it would make no difference to the +firm--all the men were insured and somehow or other, although they +frequently had narrow escapes, they did not often come to grief. + +On this occasion, just as Easton was finishing he felt the pinnacle +that he was holding on to give way, and he got such a fright that his +heart nearly stopped beating. He let go his hold and steadied himself +on the ladder as well as he was able, and when he had descended three +or four steps--into comparative safety--he remained clinging +convulsively to the ladder and feeling so limp that he was unable to go +down any further for several minutes. When he arrived at the bottom +and the others noticed how white and trembling he was, he told them +about the pinnacle being loose, and the 'coddy' coming along just then, +they told him about it, and suggested that it should be repaired, as +otherwise it might fall down and hurt someone: but the 'coddy' was +afraid that if they reported it they might be blamed for breaking it, +and the owner might expect the firm to put it right for nothing, so +they decided to say nothing about it. The pinnacle is still on the +apex of the steeple waiting for a sufficiently strong wind to blow it +down on somebody's head. + +When the other men heard of Easton's 'narrow shave', most of them said +that it would have served him bloody well right if he had fallen and +broken his neck: he should have refused to go up at all without a +proper scaffold. That was what THEY would have done. If Misery or the +coddy had ordered any of THEM to go up and paint the pinnacle off that +ladder, they would have chucked their tools down and demanded their +ha'pence! + +That was what they said, but somehow or other it never happened that +any of them ever 'chucked their tools down' at all, although such +dangerous jobs were of very frequent occurrence. + +The scamping business was not confined to houses or properties of an +inferior class: it was the general rule. Large good-class houses, +villas and mansions, the residences of wealthy people, were done in +exactly the same way. Generally in such places costly and beautiful +materials were spoilt in the using. + +There was a large mansion where the interior woodwork--the doors, +windows and staircase--had to be finished in white enamel. It was +rather an old house and the woodwork needed rubbing down and filling up +before being repainted, but of course there was not time for that, so +they painted it without properly preparing it and when it was enamelled +the rough, uneven surface of the wood looked horrible: but the owner +appeared quite satisfied because it was nice and shiny. The +dining-room of the same house was papered with a beautiful and +expensive plush paper. The ground of this wall-hanging was made to +imitate crimson watered silk, and it was covered with a raised pattern +in plush of the same colour. The price marked on the back of this +paper in the pattern book was eighteen shillings a roll. Slyme was +paid sixpence a roll for hanging it: the room took ten rolls, so it +cost nine pounds for the paper and five shillings to hang it! To fix +such a paper as this properly the walls should first be done with a +plain lining paper of the same colour as the ground of the wallpaper +itself, because unless the paperhanger 'lapps' the joints--which should +not be done--they are apt to open a little as the paper dries and to +show the white wall underneath--Slyme suggested this lining to Misery, +who would not entertain the idea for a moment--they had gone to quite +enough expense as it was, stripping the old paper off! + +So Slyme went ahead, and as he had to make his wages, he could not +spend a great deal of time over it. Some of the joints were 'lapped' +and some were butted, and two or three weeks after the owner of the +house moved in, as the paper became more dry, the joints began to open +and to show the white plaster of the wall, and then Owen had to go +there with a small pot of crimson paint and a little brush, and touch +out the white line. + +While he was doing this he noticed and touched up a number of other +faults; places where Slyme--in his haste to get the work done--had +slobbered and smeared the face of the paper with fingermarks and paste. + +The same ghastly mess was made of several other 'jobs' besides this +one, and presently they adopted the plan of painting strips of colour +on the wall in the places where the joints would come, so that if they +opened the white wall would not show: but it was found that the paste +on the back of the paper dragged the paint off the wall, and when the +joints opened the white streaks showed all the same, so Misery +abandoned all attempts to prevent joints showing, and if a customer +complained, he sent someone to 'touch it up': but the lining paper was +never used, unless the customer or the architect knew enough about the +work to insist upon it. + +In other parts of the same house the ceilings, the friezes, and the +dados, were covered with 'embossed' or 'relief' papers. These hangings +require very careful handling, for the raised parts are easily damaged; +but the men who fixed them were not allowed to take the pains and time +necessary to make good work: consequently in many places--especially at +the joints--the pattern was flattened out and obliterated. + +The ceiling of the drawing-room was done with a very thick high-relief +paper that was made in sheets about two feet square. These squares +were not very true in shape: they had evidently warped in drying after +manufacture: to make them match anything like properly would need +considerable time and care. But the men were not allowed to take the +necessary time. The result was that when it was finished it presented +a sort of 'higgledy-piggledy' appearance. But it didn't matter: +nothing seemed to matter except to get it done. One would think from +the way the hands were driven and chivvied and hurried over the work +that they were being paid five or six shillings an hour instead of as +many pence. + +'Get it done!' shouted Misery from morning till night. 'For God's sake +get it done! Haven't you finished yet? We're losing money over this +"job"! If you chaps don't wake up and move a bit quicker, I shall see +if I can't get somebody else who will.' + +These costly embossed decorations were usually finished in white; but +instead of carefully coating them with specially prepared paint of +patent distemper, which would need two or three coats, they slobbered +one thick coat of common whitewash on to it with ordinary whitewash +brushes. + +This was a most economical way to get over it, because it made it +unnecessary to stop up the joints beforehand--the whitewash filled up +all the cracks: and it also filled up the hollow parts, the crevices +and interstices of the ornament, destroying the sharp outlines of the +beautiful designs and reducing the whole to a lumpy, formless mass. But +that did not matter either, so long as they got it done. + +The architect didn't notice it, because he knew that the more Rushton & +Co. made out of the 'job', the more he himself would make. + +The man who had to pay for the work didn't notice it; he had the +fullest confidence in the architect. + +At the risk of wearying the long-suffering reader, mention must be made +of an affair that happened at this particular 'job'. + +The windows were all fitted with venetian blinds. The gentleman for +whom all the work was being done had only just purchased the house, but +he preferred roller blinds: he had had roller blinds in his former +residence--which he had just sold--and as these roller blinds were +about the right size, he decided to have them fitted to the windows of +his new house: so he instructed Mr Rushton to have all the venetian +blinds taken down and stored away up in the loft under the roof. Mr +Rushton promised to have this done; but they were not ALL put away +under the roof: he had four of them taken to his own place and fitted +up in the conservatory. They were a little too large, so they had to +be narrowed before they were fixed. + +The sequel was rather interesting, for it happened that when the +gentleman attempted to take the roller blinds from his old house, the +person to whom he had sold it refused to allow them to be removed; +claiming that when he bought the house, he bought the blinds also. +There was a little dispute, but eventually it was settled that way and +the gentleman decided that he would have the venetian blinds in his new +house after all, and instructed the people who moved his furniture to +take the venetians down again from under the roof, and refix them, and +then, of course, it was discovered that four of the blinds were +missing. Mr Rushton was sent for, and he said that he couldn't +understand it at all! The only possible explanation that he could +think of was that some of his workmen must have stolen them! He would +make inquiries, and endeavour to discover the culprits, but in any +case, as this had happened while things were in his charge, if he did +not succeed in recovering them, he would replace them. + +As the blinds had been narrowed to fit the conservatory he had to have +four new ones made. + +The customer was of course quite satisfied, although very sorry for Mr +Rushton. They had a little chat about it. Rushton told the gentleman +that he would be astonished if he knew all the facts: the difficulties +one has to contend with in dealing with working men: one has to watch +them continually! directly one's back is turned they leave off working! +They come late in the morning, and go home before the proper time at +night, and then unless one actually happens to catch them--they charge +the full number of hours on their time sheets! Every now and then +something would be missing, and of course Nobody knew anything about +it. Sometimes one would go unexpectedly to a 'job' and find a lot of +them drunk. Of course one tried to cope with these evils by means of +rules and restrictions and organization, but it was very difficult--one +could not be everywhere or have eyes at the back of one's head. The +gentleman said that he had some idea of what it was like: he had had +something to do with the lower orders himself at one time and another, +and he knew they needed a lot of watching. + +Rushton felt rather sick over this affair, but he consoled himself by +reflecting that he had got clear away with several valuable rose trees +and other plants which he had stolen out of the garden, and that a +ladder which had been discovered in the hayloft over the stable and +taken--by his instructions--to the 'yard' when the 'job' was finished +had not been missed. + +Another circumstance which helped to compensate for the blinds was that +the brass fittings throughout the house, finger-plates, sash-lifts and +locks, bolts and door handles, which were supposed to be all new and +which the customer had paid a good price for--were really all the old +ones which Misery had had re-lacquered and refixed. + +There was nothing unusual about this affair of the blinds, for Rushton +and Misery robbed everybody. They made a practice of annexing every +thing they could lay their hands upon, provided it could be done +without danger to themselves. They never did anything of a heroic or +dare-devil character: they had not the courage to break into banks or +jewellers' shops in the middle of the night, or to go out picking +pockets: all their robberies were of the sneak-thief order. + +At one house that they 'did up' Misery made a big haul. He had to get +up into the loft under the roof to see what was the matter with the +water tank. When he got up there he found a very fine hall gas lamp +made of wrought brass and copper with stained and painted glass sides. +Although covered with dust, it was otherwise in perfect condition, so +Misery had it taken to his own house and cleaned up and fixed in the +hall. + +In the same loft there were a lot of old brass picture rods and other +fittings, and three very good planks, each about ten feet in length; +these latter had been placed across the rafters so that one could walk +easily and safely over to the tank. But Misery thought they would be +very useful to the firm for whitewashing ceilings and other work, so he +had them taken to the yard along with the old brass, which was worth +about fourpence a pound. + +There was another house that had to be painted inside: the people who +used to live there had only just left: they had moved to some other +town, and the house had been re-let before they vacated it. The new +tenant had agreed with the agent that the house was to be renovated +throughout before he took possession. + +The day after the old tenants moved away, the agent gave Rushton the +key so that he could go to see what was to be done and give an estimate +for the work. + +While Rushton and Misery were looking over the house they discovered a +large barometer hanging on the wall behind the front door: it had been +overlooked by those who removed the furniture. Before returning the +key to the agent, Rushton sent one of his men to the house for the +barometer, which he kept in his office for a few weeks to see if there +would be any inquiries about it. If there had been, it would have been +easy to say that he had brought it there for safety--to take care of +till he could find the owner. The people to whom it belonged thought +the thing had been lost or stolen in transit, and afterwards one of the +workmen who had assisted to pack and remove the furniture was dismissed +from his employment on suspicion of having had something to do with its +disappearance. No one ever thought of Rushton in connection with the +matter, so after about a month he had it taken to his own dwelling and +hung up in the hall near the carved oak marble-topped console table +that he had sneaked last summer from 596 Grand Parade. + +And there it hangs unto this day: and close behind it, supported by +cords of crimson silk, is a beautiful bevelled-edged card about a foot +square, and upon this card is written, in letters of gold: 'Christ is +the head of this house; the unseen Guest at every meal, the silent +Listener to every conversation.' + +And on the other side of the barometer is another card of the same kind +and size which says: 'As for me and my house we will serve the Lord.' + +From another place they stole two large brass chandeliers. This house +had been empty for a very long time, and its owner--who did not reside +in the town--wished to sell it. The agent, to improve the chances of a +sale, decided to have the house overhauled and redecorated. Rushton & +Co.'s tender being the lowest, they got the work. The chandeliers in +the drawing-room and the dining-room were of massive brass, but they +were all blackened and tarnished. Misery suggested to the agent that +they could be cleaned and relacquered, which would make them equal to +new: in fact, they would be better than new ones, for such things as +these were not made now, and for once Misery was telling the truth. +The agent agreed and the work was done: it was an extra, of course, and +as the firm got twice as much for the job as they paid for having it +done, they were almost satisfied. + +When this and all the other work was finished they sent in their +account and were paid. + +Some months afterwards the house was sold, and Nimrod interviewed the +new proprietor with the object of securing the order for any work that +he might want done. He was successful. The papers on the walls of +several of the rooms were not to the new owner's taste, and, of course, +the woodwork would have to be re-painted to harmonize with the new +paper. There was a lot of other work besides this: a new conservatory +to build, a more modern bath and heating apparatus to be put in, and +the electric light to be installed, the new people having an objection +to the use of gas. + +The specifications were prepared by an architect, and Rushton secured +the work. When the chandeliers were taken down, the men, instructed by +Misery, put them on a handcart, and covered them over with sacks and +dust-sheets and took them to the front shop, where they were placed for +sale with the other stock. + +When all the work at the house was finished, it occurred to Rushton and +Nimrod that when the architect came to examine and pass the work before +giving them the certificate that would enable them to present their +account, he might remember the chandeliers and inquire what had become +of them. So they were again placed on the handcart, covered with sacks +and dust-sheets, taken back to the house and put up in the loft under +the roof so that, if he asked for them, there they were. + +The architect came, looked ever the house, passed the work, and gave +his certificate; he never mentioned or thought of the chandeliers. The +owner of the house was present and asked for Rushton's bill, for which +he at once gave them a cheque and Rushton and Misery almost grovelled +and wallowed on the ground before him. Throughout the whole interview +the architect and the 'gentleman' had kept their hats on, but Rushton +and Nimrod had been respectfully uncovered all the time, and as they +followed the other two about the house their bearing had been +expressive of the most abject servility. + +When the architect and the owner were gone the two chandeliers were +taken down again from under the roof, and put upon a handcart, covered +over with sacks and dust-sheets and taken back to the shop and again +placed for sale with the other stock. + +These are only a few of the petty thefts committed by these people. To +give anything approaching a full account of all the rest would require +a separate volume. + + + +As a result of all the hurrying and scamping, every now and again the +men found that they had worked themselves out of a job. + +Several times during the summer the firm had scarcely anything to do, +and nearly everybody had to stand off for a few days or weeks. + +When Newman got his first start in the early part of the year he had +only been working for about a fortnight when--with several others--he +was 'stood off'. Fortunately, however, the day after he left Rushtons, +he was lucky enough to get a start for another firm, Driver and +Botchit, where he worked for nearly a month, and then he was again +given a job at Rushton's, who happened to be busy again. + +He did not have to lose much time, for he 'finished up' for Driver and +Botchit on a Thursday night and on the Friday he interviewed Misery, +who told him they were about to commence a fresh 'job' on the following +Monday morning at six o'clock, and that he could start with them. So +this time Newman was only out of work the Friday and Saturday, which +was another stroke of luck, because it often happens that a man has to +lose a week or more after 'finishing up' for one firm before he gets +another 'job'. + +All through the summer Crass continued to be the general 'colour-man', +most of his time being spent at the shop mixing up colours for all the +different 'jobs'. He also acted as a sort of lieutenant to Hunter, +who, as the reader has already been informed, was not a practical +painter. When there was a price to be given for some painting work, +Misery sometimes took Crass with him to look over it and help him to +estimate the amount of time and material it would take. Crass was thus +in a position of more than ordinary importance, not only being superior +to the 'hands', but also ranking above the other sub-foremen who had +charge of the 'jobs'. + +It was Crass and these sub-foremen who were to blame for most of the +scamping and driving, because if it had not been for them neither +Rushton nor Hunter would have known how to scheme the work. + +Of course, Hunter and Rushton wanted to drive and scamp, but not being +practical men they would not have known how if it had not been for +Crass and the others, who put them up to all the tricks of the trade. + +Crass knew that when the men stayed till half past seven they were in +the habit of ceasing work for a few minutes to eat a mouthful of grub +about six o'clock, so he suggested to Misery that as it was not +possible to stop this, it would be a good plan to make the men stop +work altogether from half past five till six, and lose half an hour's +pay; and to make up the time, instead of leaving off at seven-thirty, +they could work till eight. + +Misery had known of and winked at the former practice, for he knew that +the men could not work all that time without something to eat, but +Crass's suggestion seemed a much better way, and it was adopted. + +When the other masters in Mugsborough heard of this great reform they +all followed suit, and it became the rule in that town, whenever it was +necessary to work overtime, for the men to stay till eight instead of +half past seven as formerly, and they got no more pay than before. + +Previous to this summer it had been the almost invariable rule to have +two men in each room that was being painted, but Crass pointed out to +Misery that under such circumstances they wasted time talking to each +other, and they also acted as a check on one another: each of them +regulated the amount of work he did by the amount the other did, and if +the 'job' took too long it was always difficult to decide which of the +two was to blame: but if they were made to work alone, each of them +would be on his mettle; he would not know how much the others were +doing, and the fear of being considered slow in comparison with others +would make them all tear into it all they could. + +Misery thought this a very good idea, so the solitary system was +introduced, and as far as practicable, one room, one man became the +rule. + +They even tried to make the men distemper large ceilings single-handed, +and succeeded in one or two cases, but after several ceilings had been +spoilt and had to be washed off and done over again, they gave that up: +but nearly all the other work was now arranged on the 'solitary +system', and it worked splendidly: each man was constantly in a state +of panic as to whether the others were doing more work than himself. + +Another suggestion that Crass made to Misery was that the sub-foremen +should be instructed never to send a man into a room to prepare it for +painting. + +'If you sends a man into a room to get it ready,' said Crass, ''e makes +a meal of it! 'E spends as much time messin' about rubbin' down and +stoppin' up as it would take to paint it. But,' he added, with a +cunning leer, 'give 'em a bit of putty and a little bit of glass-paper, +and the paint at the stand, and then 'e gits it in 'is mind as 'e's +going in there to paint it! And 'e doesn't mess about much over the +preparing of it'. + +These and many other suggestions--all sorts of devices for scamping and +getting over the work--were schemed out by Crass and the other +sub-foremen, who put them into practice and showed them to Misery and +Rushton in the hope of currying favour with them and being 'kept on'. +And between the lot of them they made life a veritable hell for +themselves, and the hands, and everybody else around them. And the +mainspring of it all was--the greed and selfishness of one man, who +desired to accumulate money! For this was the only object of all the +driving and bullying and hatred and cursing and unhappiness--to make +money for Rushton, who evidently considered himself a deserving case. + +It is sad and discreditable, but nevertheless true, that some of the +more selfish of the philanthropists often became weary of well-doing, +and lost all enthusiasm in the good cause. At such times they used to +say that they were 'Bloody well fed up' with the whole business and +'Tired of tearing their bloody guts out for the benefit of other +people' and every now and then some of these fellows would 'chuck up' +work, and go on the booze, sometimes stopping away for two or three +days or a week at a time. And then, when it was all over, they came +back, very penitent, to ask for another 'start', but they generally +found that their places had been filled. + +If they happened to be good 'sloggers'--men who made a practice of +'tearing their guts out' when they did work--they were usually +forgiven, and after being admonished by Misery, permitted to resume +work, with the understanding that if ever it occurred again they would +get the 'infernal'--which means the final and irrevocable--sack. + + + +There was once a job at a shop that had been a high-class restaurant +kept by a renowned Italian chef. It had been known as + + 'MACARONI'S ROYAL ITALIAN CAFE' + +Situated on the Grand Parade, it was a favourite resort of the 'Elite', +who frequented it for afternoon tea and coffee and for little suppers +after the theatre. + +It had plate-glass windows, resplendent with gilding, marble-topped +tables with snow white covers, vases of flowers, and all the other +appurtenances of glittering cut glass and silver. The obsequious +waiters were in evening dress, the walls were covered with lofty +plate-glass mirrors in carved and gilded frames, and at certain hours +of the day and night an orchestra consisting of two violins and a harp +discoursed selections of classic music. + +But of late years the business had not been paying, and finally the +proprietor went bankrupt and was sold out. The place was shut up for +several months before the shop was let to a firm of dealers in fancy +articles, and the other part was transformed into flats. + +Rushton had the contract for the work. When the men went there to 'do +it up' they found the interior of the house in a state of indescribable +filth: the ceilings discoloured with smoke and hung with cobwebs, the +wallpapers smeared and black with grease, the handrails and the newel +posts of the staircase were clammy with filth, and the edges of the +doors near the handles were blackened with greasy dirt and +finger-marks. The tops of the skirtings, the mouldings of the doors, +the sashes of the windows and the corners of the floors were thick with +the accumulated dust of years. + +In one of the upper rooms which had evidently been used as a nursery or +playroom for the children of the renowned chef, the wallpaper for about +two feet above the skirting was blackened with grease and ornamented +with childish drawings made with burnt sticks and blacklead pencils, +the door being covered with similar artistic efforts, to say nothing of +some rude attempts at carving, evidently executed with an axe or a +hammer. But all this filth was nothing compared with the unspeakable +condition of the kitchen and scullery, a detailed description of which +would cause the blood of the reader to curdle, and each particular hair +of his head to stand on end. + +Let it suffice to say that the walls, the ceiling, the floor, the +paintwork, the gas-stove, the kitchen range, the dresser and everything +else were uniformly absolutely and literally--black. And the black was +composed of soot and grease. + +In front of the window there was a fixture--a kind of bench or table, +deeply scored with marks of knives like a butcher's block. The sill of +the window was about six inches lower than the top of the table, so +that between the glass of the lower sash of the window, which had +evidently never been raised, and the back of the table, there was a +long narrow cavity or trough, about six inches deep, four inches wide +and as long as the width of the window, the sill forming the bottom of +the cavity. + +This trough was filled with all manner of abominations: fragments of +fat and decomposed meat, legs of rabbits and fowls, vegetable matter, +broken knives and forks, and hair: and the glass of the window was +caked with filth of the same description. + +This job was the cause of the sacking of the Semi-drunk and another man +named Bill Bates, who were sent into the kitchen to clean it down and +prepare it for painting and distempering. + +They commenced to do it, but it made them feel so ill that they went +out and had a pint each, and after that they made another start at it. +But it was not long before they felt that it was imperatively necessary +to have another drink. So they went over to the pub, and this time +they had two pints each. Bill paid for the first two and then the +Semi-drunk refused to return to work unless Bill would consent to have +another pint with him before going back. When they had drunk the two +pints, they decided--in order to save themselves the trouble and risk +of coming away from the job--to take a couple of quarts back with them +in two bottles, which the landlord of the pub lent them, charging +twopence on each bottle, to be refunded when they were returned. + +When they got back to the job they found the 'coddy' in the kitchen, +looking for them and he began to talk and grumble, but the Semi-drunk +soon shut him up: he told him he could either have a drink out of one +of the bottles or a punch in the bloody nose--whichever he liked! Or +if he did not fancy either of these alternatives, he could go to hell! + +As the 'coddy' was a sensible man he took the beer and advised them to +pull themselves together and try to get some work done before Misery +came, which they promised to do. + +When the 'coddy' was gone they made another attempt at the work. Misery +came a little while afterwards and began shouting at them because he +said he could not see what they had done. It looked as if they had +been asleep all the morning: Here it was nearly ten o'clock, and as far +as he could see, they had done Nothing! + +When he was gone they drank the rest of the beer and then they began to +feel inclined to laugh. What did they care for Hunter or Rushton +either? To hell with both of 'em! They left off scraping and +scrubbing, and began throwing buckets of water over the dresser and the +walls, laughing uproariously all the time. + +'We'll show the b--s how to wash down paintwork!' shouted the +Semi-drunk, as he stood in the middle of the room and hurled a pailful +of water over the door of the cupboard. 'Bring us another bucket of +water, Bill.' + +Bill was out in the scullery filling his pail under the tap, and +laughing so much that he could scarcely stand. As soon as it was full +he passed it to the Semi-drunk, who threw it bodily, pail and all, on +to the bench in front of the window, smashing one of the panes of +glass. The water poured off the table and all over the floor. + +Bill brought the next pailful in and threw it at the kitchen door, +splitting one of the panels from top to bottom, and then they threw +about half a dozen more pailfuls over the dresser. + +'We'll show the b--rs how to clean paintwork,' they shouted, as they +hurled the buckets at the walls and doors. + +By this time the floor was deluged with water, which mingled with the +filth and formed a sea of mud. + +They left the two taps running in the scullery and as the waste pipe of +the sink was choked up with dirt, the sink filled up and overflowed +like a miniature Niagara. + +The water ran out under the doors into the back-yard, and along the +passage out to the front door. But Bill Bates and the Semi-drunk +remained in the kitchen, smashing the pails at the walls and doors and +the dresser, and cursing and laughing hysterically. + +They had just filled the two buckets and were bringing them into the +kitchen when they heard Hunter's voice in the passage, shouting out +inquiries as to where all that water came from. Then they heard him +advancing towards them and they stood waiting for him with the pails in +their hands, and directly he opened the door and put his head into the +room they let fly the two pails at him. Unfortunately, they were too +drunk and excited to aim straight. One pail struck the middle rail of +the door and the other the wall by the side of it. + +Misery hastily shut the door again and ran upstairs, and presently the +'coddy' came down and called out to them from the passage. + +They went out to see what he wanted, and he told them that Misery had +gone to the office to get their wages ready: they were to make out +their time sheets and go for their money at once. Misery had said that +if they were not there in ten minutes he would have the pair of them +locked up. + +The Semi-drunk said that nothing would suit them better than to have +all their pieces at once--they had spent all their money and wanted +another drink. Bill Bates concurred, so they borrowed a piece of +blacklead pencil from the 'coddy' and made out their time sheets, took +off their aprons, put them into their tool bags, and went to the office +for their money, which Misery passed out to them through the trap-door. + +The news of this exploit spread all over the town during that day and +evening, and although it was in July, the next morning at six o'clock +there were half a dozen men waiting at the yard to ask Misery if there +was 'any chance of a job'. + +Bill Bates and the Semi-drunk had had their spree and had got the sack +for it and most of the chaps said it served them right. Such conduct +as that was going too far. + +Most of them would have said the same thing no matter what the +circumstances might have been. They had very little sympathy for each +other at any time. + +Often, when, for instance, one man was sent away from one 'job' to +another, the others would go into his room and look at the work he had +been doing, and pick out all the faults they could find and show them +to each other, making all sorts of ill-natured remarks about the absent +one meanwhile. 'Jist run yer nose over that door, Jim,' one would say +in a tone of disgust. 'Wotcher think of it? Did yer ever see sich a +mess in yer life? Calls hisself a painter!' And the other man would +shake his head sadly and say that although the one who had done it had +never been up to much as a workman, he could do it a bit better than +that if he liked, but the fact was that he never gave himself time to +do anything properly: he was always tearing his bloody guts out! Why, +he'd only been in this room about four hours from start to finish! He +ought to have a watering cart to follow him about, because he worked at +such a hell of a rate you couldn't see him for dust! And then the +first man would reply that other people could do as they liked, but for +his part, HE was not going to tear his guts out for nobody! + +The second man would applaud these sentiments and say that he wasn't +going to tear his out either: and then they would both go back to their +respective rooms and tear into the work for all they were worth, making +the same sort of 'job' as the one they had been criticizing, and +afterwards, when the other's back was turned, each of them in turn +would sneak into the other's room and criticize it and point out the +faults to anyone else who happened to be near at hand. + +Harlow was working at the place that had been Macaroni's Cafe when one +day a note was sent to him from Hunter at the shop. It was written on +a scrap of wallpaper, and worded in the usual manner of such notes--as +if the writer had studied how to avoid all suspicion of being unduly +civil: + + Harlow go to the yard at once take your tools with you. + Crass will tell you where you have to go. + J.H. + +They were just finishing their dinners when the boy brought this note; +and after reading it aloud for the benefit of the others, Harlow +remarked that it was worded in much the same way in which one would +speak to a dog. The others said nothing; but after he was gone the +other men--who all considered that it was ridiculous for the 'likes of +us' to expect or wish to be treated with common civility--laughed about +it, and said that Harlow was beginning to think he was Somebody: they +supposed it was through readin' all those books what Owen was always +lendin' 'im. And then one of them got a piece of paper and wrote a +note to be given to Harlow at the first opportunity. This note was +properly worded, written in a manner suitable for a gentleman like him, +neatly folded and addressed: + + + Mr Harlow Esq., + c/o Macaroni's Royal Cafe + till called for. + + Mister Harlow, + Dear Sir: Wood you kinely oblige me bi cummin to the paint shop + as soon as you can make it convenient as there is a sealin' to be + wite-woshed hoppin this is not trubbling you to much + + I remane + Yours respeckfully + Pontius Pilate. + +This note was read out for the amusement of the company and afterwards +stored away in the writer's pocket till such a time as an opportunity +should occur of giving it to Harlow. + +As the writer of the note was on his way back to his room to resume +work he was accosted by a man who had gone into Harlow's room to +criticize it, and had succeeded in finding several faults which he +pointed out to the other, and of course they were both very much +disgusted with Harlow. + +'I can't think why the coddy keeps him on the job,' said the first man. +'Between you and me, if I had charge of a job, and Misery sent Harlow +there--I'd send 'im back to the shop.' + +'Same as you,' agreed the other as he went back to tear into his own +room. 'Same as you, old man: I shouldn't 'ave 'im neither.' + +It must not be supposed from this that either of these two men were on +exceptionally bad terms with Harlow; they were just as good friends +with him--to his face--as they were with each other--to each other's +faces--and it was just their way: that was all. + +If it had been one or both of these two who had gone away instead of +Harlow, just the same things would have been said about them by the +others who remained--it was merely their usual way of speaking about +each other behind each other's backs. + +It was always the same: if any one of them made a mistake or had an +accident or got into any trouble he seldom or never got any sympathy +from his fellow workmen. On the contrary, most of them at such times +seemed rather pleased than otherwise. + +There was a poor devil--a stranger in the town; he came from +London--who got the sack for breaking some glass. He had been sent to +'burn off' some old paint of the woodwork of a window. He was not very +skilful in the use of the burning-off lamp, because on the firm when he +had been working in London it was a job that the ordinary hands were +seldom or never called upon to do. There were one or two men who did +it all. For that matter, not many of Rushton's men were very skilful +at it either. It was a job everybody tried to get out of, because +nearly always the lamp went wrong and there was a row about the time +the work took. So they worked this job on to the stranger. + +This man had been out of work for a long time before he got a start at +Rushton's, and he was very anxious not to lose the job, because he had +a wife and family in London. When the 'coddy' told him to go and burn +off this window he did not like to say that he was not used to the +work: he hoped to be able to do it. But he was very nervous, and the +end was that although he managed to do the burning off all right, just +as he was finishing he accidentally allowed the flame of the lamp to +come into contact with a large pane of glass and broke it. + +They sent to the shop for a new pane of glass, and the man stayed late +that night and put it in in his own time, thus bearing half the cost of +repairing it. + +Things were not very busy just then, and on the following Saturday two +of the hands were 'stood off'. The stranger was one of them, and +nearly everybody was very pleased. At mealtimes the story of the +broken window was repeatedly told amid jeering laughter. It really +seemed as if a certain amount of indignation was felt that a +stranger--especially such an inferior person as this chap who did not +know how to use a lamp--should have had the cheek to try to earn his +living at all! One thing was very certain--they said, gleefully--he +would never get another job at Rushton's: that was one good thing. + +And yet they all knew that this accident might have happened to any one +of them. + +Once a couple of men got the sack because a ceiling they distempered +had to be washed off and done again. It was not really the men's fault +at all: it was a ceiling that needed special treatment and they had not +been allowed to do it properly. + +But all the same, when they got the sack most of the others laughed and +sneered and were glad. Perhaps because they thought that the fact that +these two unfortunates had been disgraced, increased their own chances +of being 'kept on'. And so it was with nearly everything. With a few +exceptions, they had an immense amount of respect for Rushton and +Hunter, and very little respect or sympathy for each other. + +Exactly the same lack of feeling for each other prevailed amongst the +members of all the different trades. Everybody seemed glad if anybody +got into trouble for any reason whatever. + +There was a garden gate that had been made at the carpenter's shop: it +was not very well put together, and for the usual reason; the man had +not been allowed the time to do it properly. After it was fixed, one +of his shopmates wrote upon it with lead pencil in big letters: 'This +is good work for a joiner. Order one ton of putty.' + +But to hear them talking in the pub of a Saturday afternoon just after +pay-time one would think them the best friends and mates and the most +independent spirits in the world, fellows whom it would be very +dangerous to trifle with, and who would stick up for each other through +thick and thin. All sorts of stories were related of the wonderful +things they had done and said; of jobs they had 'chucked up', and +masters they had 'told off': of pails of whitewash thrown over +offending employers, and of horrible assaults and batteries committed +upon the same. But strange to say, for some reason or other, it seldom +happened that a third party ever witnessed any of these prodigies. It +seemed as if a chivalrous desire to spare the feelings of their victims +had always prevented them from doing or saying anything to them in the +presence of witnesses. + +When he had drunk a few pints, Crass was a very good hand at these +stories. Here is one that he told in the bar of the Cricketers on the +Saturday afternoon of the same week that Bill Bates and the Semi-drunk +got the sack. The Cricketers was only a few minutes walk from the shop +and at pay-time a number of the men used to go in there to take a drink +before going home. + +'Last Thursday night about five o'clock, 'Unter comes inter the +paint-shop an' ses to me, "I wants a pail o' wash made up tonight, +Crass," 'e ses, "ready for fust thing in the mornin'," 'e ses. "Oh," I +ses, lookin' 'im straight in the bloody eye, "Oh, yer do, do +yer?"--just like that. "Yes," 'e ses. "Well, you can bloody well make +it yerself!" I ses, "'cos I ain't agoin' to," I ses--just like that. +"Wot the 'ell do yer mean," I ses, "by comin' 'ere at this time o' +night with a order like that?" I ses. You'd a larfed,' continued +Crass, as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand after taking +another drink out of his glass, and looking round to note the effect of +the story, 'you'd a larfed if you'd bin there. 'E was fairly +flabbergasted! And wen I said that to 'im I see 'is jaw drop! An' +then 'e started apoligizing and said as 'e 'adn't meant no offence, but +I told 'im bloody straight not to come no more of it. "You bring the +horder at a reasonable time," I ses--just like that--"and I'll attend +to it," I ses, "but not otherwise," I ses.' + +As he concluded this story, Crass drained his glass and gazed round +upon the audience, who were full of admiration. They looked at each +other and at Crass and nodded their heads approvingly. Yes, +undoubtedly, that was the proper way to deal with such bounders as +Nimrod; take up a strong attitude, an' let 'em see as you'll stand no +nonsense! + +'Yer don't blame me, do yer?' continued Crass. 'Why should we put up +with a lot of old buck from the likes of 'im! We're not a lot of +bloody Chinamen, are we?' + +So far from blaming him, they all assured him that they would have +acted in precisely the same way under similar circumstances. + +'For my part, I'm a bloke like this,' said a tall man with a very loud +voice--a chap who nearly fell down dead every time Rushton or Misery +looked at him. 'I'm a bloke like this 'ere: I never stands no cheek +from no gaffers! If a guv'nor ses two bloody words to me, I downs me +tools and I ses to 'im, "Wot! Don't I suit yer, guv'ner? Ain't I done +enuff for yer? Werry good! Gimmie me bleedin' a'pence."' + +'Quite right too,' said everybody. That was the way to serve 'em. If +only everyone would do the same as the tall man--who had just paid for +another round of drinks--things would be a lot more comfortable than +they was. + +'Last summer I was workin' for ole Buncer,' said a little man with a +cutaway coat several sizes too large for him. 'I was workin' for ole +Buncer, over at Windley, an' you all knows as 'e don't arf lower it. +Well, one day, when I knowed 'e was on the drunk, I 'ad to first coat a +room out--white; so thinks I to meself, "If I buck up I shall be able +to get this lot done by about four o'clock, an' then I can clear orf +'ome. 'Cos I reckoned as 'e'd be about flattened out by that time, an' +you know 'e ain't got no foreman. So I tears into it an' gets this +'ere room done about a quarter past four, an' I'd just got me things +put away for the night w'en 'oo should come fallin' up the bloody +stairs but ole Buncer, drunk as a howl! An' no sooner 'e gits inter +the room than 'e starts yappin' an' rampin'." "Is this 'ere hall +you've done?" 'e shouts out. "Wotcher bin up to hall day?" 'e ses, an' +'e keeps on shouting' an' swearin' till at last I couldn't stand it no +longer, 'cos you can guess I wasn't in a very good temper with 'im +comin' along jist then w'en I thought I was goin' to get orf a bit +early--so w'en 'e kept on shoutin' I never made no answer to 'im, but +ups with me fist an' I gives 'im a slosh in the dial an' stopped 'is +clock! Then I chucked the pot o' w'ite paint hover 'im, an' kicked 'im +down the bloody stairs.' + +'Serve 'im blooming well right, too,' said Crass as he took a fresh +glass of beer from one of the others, who had just 'stood' another +round. + +'What did the b--r say to that?' inquired the tall man. + +'Not a bloody word!' replied the little man, ''E picked 'isself up, and +called a keb wot was passin' an' got inter it an' went 'ome; an' I +never seen no more of 'im until about 'arf-past eleven the next day, +w'en I was second-coatin' the room, an' 'e comes up with a noo suit o' +clothes on, an' arsts me if I'd like to come hover to the pub an' 'ave +a drink? So we goes hover, an' 'e calls for a w'iskey an' soda for +isself an' arsts me wot I'd 'ave, so I 'ad the same. An' w'ile we was +gettin' it down us, 'e ses to me, "Ah, Garge," 'e ses. "You losed your +temper with me yesterday,"' 'e ses.' + +'There you are, you see!' said the tall man. 'There's an example for +yer! If you 'adn't served 'im as you did you'd most likely 'ave 'ad to +put up with a lot more ole buck.' + +They all agreed that the little man had done quite right: they all said +that they didn' blame him in the least: they would all have done the +same: in fact, this was the way they all conducted themselves whenever +occasion demanded it. To hear them talk, one would imagine that such +affairs as the recent exploit of Bill Bates and the Semi-drunk were +constantly taking place, instead of only occurring about once in a blue +moon. + +Crass stood the final round of drinks, and as he evidently thought that +circumstance deserved to be signalized in some special manner, he +proposed the following toast, which was drunk with enthusiasm: + + 'To hell with the man, + May he never grow fat, + What carries two faces, + Under one 'at.' + +Rushton & Co. did a lot of work that summer. They did not have many +big jobs, but there were a lot of little ones, and the boy Bert was +kept busy running from one to the other. He spent most of his time +dragging a handcart with loads of paint, or planks and steps, and +seldom went out to work with the men, for when he was not taking things +out to the various places where the philanthropists were working, he +was in the paintshop at the yard, scraping out dirty paint-pots or +helping Crass to mix up colours. Although scarcely anyone seemed to +notice it, the boy presented a truly pitiable spectacle. He was very +pale and thin. Dragging the handcart did not help him to put on flesh, +for the weather was very hot and the work made him sweat. + +His home was right away on the other side of Windley. It took him more +than three-quarters of an hour to walk to the shop, and as he had to be +at work at six, that meant that he had to leave home at a few minutes +past five every morning, so that he always got up about half past four. + +He was wearing a man's coat--or rather jacket--which gave the upper +part of his body a bulky appearance. The trousers were part of a suit +of his own, and were somewhat narrowly cut, as is the rule with boys' +cheap ready-made trousers. These thin legs appearing under the big +jacket gave him a rather grotesque appearance, which was heightened by +the fact that all his clothes, cap, coat, waistcoat, trousers and +boots, were smothered with paint and distemper of various colours, and +there were generally a few streaks of paint of some sort or other upon +his face, and of course his hands--especially round the +fingernails--were grimed with it. But the worst of all were the +dreadful hobnailed boots: the leather of the uppers of these was an +eighth of an inch thick, and very stiff. Across the fore part of the +boot this hard leather had warped into ridges and valleys, which chafed +his feet, and made them bleed. The soles were five-eighths of an inch +thick, covered with hobnails, and were as hard and inflexible and +almost as heavy as iron. These boots hurt his feet dreadfully and made +him feel very tired and miserable, for he had such a lot of walking to +do. He used to be jolly glad when dinner-time came, for then he used to +get out of sight in some quiet spot and lie down for the whole hour. +His favourite dining-place was up in the loft over the carpenter's +shop, where they stored the mouldings and architraves. No one ever +came there at that hour, and after he had eaten his dinner he used to +lie down and think and rest. + +He nearly always had an hour for dinner, but he did not always have it +at the same time: sometimes he had it at twelve o'clock and sometimes +not till two. It all depended upon what stuff had to be taken to the +job. + +Often it happened that some men at a distant job required some material +to use immediately after dinner, and perhaps Crass was not able to get +it ready till twelve o'clock, so that it was not possible to take it +before dinner-time, and if Bert left it till after dinner the men would +be wasting their time waiting for it: so in such cases he took it there +first and had his dinner when he came back. + +Sometimes he got back about half past twelve, and it was necessary for +him to take out another lot of material at one o'clock. + +In such a case he 'charged' half an hour overtime on his time sheet--he +used to get twopence an hour for overtime. + +Sometimes Crass sent him with a handcart to one job to get a pair of +steps or tressels, or a plank, or some material or other, and take them +to another job, and on these occasions it was often very late before he +was able to take his meals. Instead of getting his breakfast at eight, +it was often nearly nine before he got back to the shop, and frequently +he had to go without dinner until half past one or two. + +Sometimes he could scarcely manage to carry the pots of paint to the +jobs; his feet were so hot and sore. When he had to push the cart it +was worse still, and often when knocking-off time came he felt so tired +that he could scarcely manage to walk home. + +But the weather was not always hot or fine: sometimes it was quite +cold, almost like winter, and there was a lot of rain that summer. At +such times the boy frequently got wet through several times a day as he +went from one job to another, and he had to work all the time in his +wet clothes and boots, which were usually old and out of repair and let +in the water. + +One of the worst jobs that he had to do was when a new stock of white +lead came in. This stuff came in wooden barrels containing two +hundredweight, and he used to have to dig it out of these barrels with +a trowel, and put it into a metal tank, where it was kept covered with +water, and the empty barrels were returned to the makers. + +When he was doing this work he usually managed to get himself smeared +all over with the white lead, and this circumstance, and the fact that +he was always handling paint or some poisonous material or other was +doubtless the cause of the terrible pains he often had in his +stomach--pains that sometimes caused him to throw himself down and roll +on the ground in agony. + +One afternoon Crass sent him with a handcart to a job that Easton, +Philpot, Harlow and Owen were just finishing. He got there about half +past four and helped the men to load up the things, and afterwards +walked alongside the cart with them back to the shop. + +On the way they all noticed and remarked to each other that the boy +looked tired and pale and that he seemed to limp: but he did not say +anything, although he guessed that they were talking about him. They +arrived at the shop a little before knocking-off time--about ten +minutes past five. Bert helped them to unload, and afterwards, while +they were putting their things away and 'charging up' the unused +materials they had brought back, he pushed the cart over to the shed +where it was kept, on the other side of the yard. He did not return to +the shop at once and a few minutes later when Harlow came out into the +yard to get a bucket of water to wash their hands with, he saw the boy +leaning on the side of the cart, crying, and holding one foot off the +ground. + +Harlow asked him what was the matter, and while he was speaking to him +the others came out to see what was up: the boy said he had rheumatism +or growing pains or something in his leg, 'just here near the knee'. +But he didn't say much, he just cried miserably, and turned his head +slowly from side to side, avoiding the looks of the men because he felt +ashamed that they should see him cry. + +When they saw how ill and miserable he looked, the men all put their +hands in their pockets to get some coppers to give to him so that he +could ride home on the tram. They gave him fivepence altogether, more +than enough to ride all the way; and Crass told him to go at +once--there was no need to wait till half past; but before he went +Philpot got a small glass bottle out of his tool bag and filled it with +oil and turps--two of turps and one of oil--which he gave to Bert to +rub into his leg before going to bed: The turps--he explained--was to +cure the pain and the oil was to prevent it from hurting the skin. He +was to get his mother to rub it in for him if he were too tired to do +it himself. Bert promised to observe these directions, and, drying his +tears, took his dinner basket and limped off to catch the tram. + +It was a few days after this that Hunter met with an accident. He was +tearing off on his bicycle to one of the jobs about five minutes to +twelve to see if he could catch anyone leaving off for dinner before +the proper time, and while going down a rather steep hill the +front brake broke--the rubbers of the rear one were worn out and failed +to act--so Misery to save himself from being smashed against the +railings of the houses at the bottom of the hill, threw himself off the +machine, with the result that his head and face and hands were terribly +cut and bruised. He was so badly knocked about that he had to remain +at home for nearly three weeks, much to the delight of the men and the +annoyance--one might even say the indignation--of Mr Rushton, who did +not know enough about the work to make out estimates without +assistance. There were several large jobs to be tendered for at the +same time, so Rushton sent the specifications round to Hunter's house +for him to figure out the prices, and nearly all the time that Misery +was at home he was sitting up in bed, swathed in bandages, trying to +calculate the probable cost of these jobs. Rushton did not come to see +him, but he sent Bert nearly every day, either with some +specifications, or some accounts, or something of that sort, or with a +note inquiring when Hunter thought he would be able to return to work. + +All sorts of rumours became prevalent amongst the men concerning +Hunter's condition. He had 'broken his spiral column', he had +'conjunction of the brain', or he had injured his 'innards' and would +probably never be able to 'do no more slave-drivin''. Crass--who had +helped Mr Rushton to 'price up' several small jobs--began to think it +might not be altogether a bad thing for himself if something were to +happen to Hunter, and he began to put on side and to assume airs of +authority. He got one of the light-weights to assist him in his work +of colourman and made him do all the hard work, while he spent part of +his own time visiting the different jobs to see how the work progressed. + +Crass's appearance did him justice. He was wearing a pair of sporting +trousers the pattern of which consisted of large black and white +squares. The previous owner of these trousers was taller and slighter +than Crass, so although the legs were about a couple of inches too +long, they fitted him rather tightly, so much so that it was fortunate +that he had his present job of colourman, for if he had had to do any +climbing up and down ladders or steps, the trousers would have burst. +His jacket was also two or three sizes too small, and the sleeves were +so short that the cuffs of his flanelette shirt were visible. This +coat was made of serge, and its colour had presumably once been blue, +but it was now a sort of heliotrope and violet: the greater part being +of the former tint, and the parts under the sleeves of the latter. This +jacket fitted very tightly across the shoulders and back and being much +too short left his tightly clad posteriors exposed to view. + +He however seemed quite unconscious of anything peculiar in his +appearance and was so bumptious and offensive that most of the men were +almost glad when Nimrod came back. They said that if Crass ever got +the job he would be a dam' sight worse than Hunter. As for the latter, +for a little while after his return to work it was said that his +illness had improved his character: he had had time to think things +over; and in short, he was ever so much better than before: but it was +not long before this story began to be told the other way round. He +was worse than ever! and a thing that happened about a fortnight after +his return caused more ill feeling and resentment against him and +Rushton than had ever existed previously. What led up to it was +something that was done by Bundy's mate, Ted Dawson. + +This poor wretch was scarcely ever seen without a load of some sort or +other: carrying a sack of cement or plaster, a heavy ladder, a big +bucket of mortar, or dragging a load of scaffolding on a cart. He must +have been nearly as strong as a horse, because after working in this +manner for Rushton & Co. from six in the morning till half past five at +night, he usually went to work in his garden for two or three hours +after tea, and frequently went there for an hour or so in the morning +before going to work. The poor devil needed the produce of his garden +to supplement his wages, for he had a wife and three children to +provide for and he earned only--or rather, to be correct, he was paid +only--fourpence an hour. + +There was an old house to which they were making some alterations and +repairs, and there was a lot of old wood taken out of it: old, decayed +floorboards and stuff of that kind, wood that was of no use whatever +except to burn. + +Bundy and his mate were working there, and one night, Misery came a few +minutes before half past five and caught Dawson in the act of tying up +a small bundle of this wood. When Hunter asked him what he was going +to do with it he made no attempt at prevarication or concealment: he +said he was going to take it home for fire-wood, because it was of no +other use. Misery kicked up a devil of a row and ordered him to leave +the wood where it was: it had to be taken to the yard, and it was +nothing to do with Dawson or anyone else whether it was any use or not! +If he caught anyone taking wood away he would sack them on the spot. +Hunter shouted very loud so that all the others might hear, and as they +were all listening attentively in the next room, where they were taking +their aprons off preparatory to going home, they got the full benefit +of his remarks. + +The following Saturday when the hands went to the office for their +money they were each presented with a printed card bearing the +following legend: + + Under no circumstances is any article or material, however + trifling, to be taken away by workmen for their private use, + whether waste material or not, from any workshop or place where + work is being done. Foremen are hereby instructed to see that + this order is obeyed and to report any such act coming to their + knowledge. Any man breaking this rule will be either dismissed + without notice or given into custody. + Rushton & Co. + +Most of the men took these cards with the envelopes containing their +wages and walked away without making any comment--in fact, most of them +were some distance away before they realized exactly what the card was +about. Two or three of them stood a few steps away from the pay window +in full view of Rushton and Misery and ostentatiously tore the thing +into pieces and threw them into the street. One man remained at the +pay window while he read the card--and then flung it with an obscene +curse into Rushton's face, and demanded his back day, which they gave +him without any remark or delay, the other men who were not yet paid +having to wait while he made out his time-sheet for that morning. + +The story of this card spread all over the place in a very short time. +It became the talk of every shop in the town. Whenever any of +Rushton's men encountered the employees of another firm, the latter +used to shout after them--'However trifling!'--or 'Look out, chaps! +'Ere comes some of Rushton's pickpockets.' + +Amongst Rushton's men themselves it became a standing joke or form of +greeting to say when one met another--'Remember! However trifling!' + +If one of their number was seen going home with an unusual amount of +paint or whitewash on his hands or clothes, the others would threaten +to report him for stealing the material. They used to say that however +trifling the quantity, it was against orders to take it away. + +Harlow drew up a list of rules which he said Mr Rushton had instructed +him to communicate to the men. One of these rules provided that +everybody was to be weighed upon arrival at the job in the morning and +again at leaving-off time: any man found to have increased in weight +was to be discharged. + +There was also much cursing and covert resentment about it; the men +used to say that such a thing as that looked well coming from the likes +of Rushton and Hunter, and they used to remind each other of the affair +of the marble-topped console table, the barometer, the venetian blinds +and all the other robberies. + +None of them ever said anything to either Misery or Rushton about the +cards, but one morning when the latter was reading his letters at the +breakfast table, on opening one of them he found that it contained one +of the notices, smeared with human excrement. He did not eat any more +breakfast that morning. + +It was not to be much wondered at that none of them had the courage to +openly resent the conditions under which they had to work, for although +it was summer, there were many men out of employment, and it was much +easier to get the sack than it was to get another job. + +None of the men were ever caught stealing anything, however trifling, +but all the same during the course of the summer five or six of them +were captured by the police and sent to jail--for not being able to pay +their poor rates. + +All through the summer Owen continued to make himself objectionable and +to incur the ridicule of his fellow workmen by talking about the causes +of poverty and of ways to abolish it. + +Most of the men kept two shillings or half a crown of their wages back +from their wives for pocket money, which they spent on beer and +tobacco. There were a very few who spent a little more than this, and +there were a still smaller number who spent so much in this way that +their families had to suffer in consequence. + +Most of those who kept back half a crown or three shillings from their +wives did so on the understanding that they were to buy their clothing +out of it. Some of them had to pay a shilling a week to a tallyman or +credit clothier. These were the ones who indulged in shoddy new +suits--at long intervals. Others bought--or got their wives to buy for +them--their clothes at second-hand shops, 'paying off' about a shilling +or so a week and not receiving the things till they were paid for. + +There were a very large proportion of them who did not spend even a +shilling a week for drink: and there were numerous others who, while +not being formally total abstainers, yet often went for weeks together +without either entering a public house or tasting intoxicating drink in +any form. + +Then there were others who, instead of drinking tea or coffee or cocoa +with their dinners or suppers, drank beer. This did not cost more than +the teetotal drinks, but all the same there are some persons who say +that those who swell the 'Nation's Drink Bill' by drinking beer with +their dinners or suppers are a kind of criminal, and that they ought to +be compelled to drink something else: that is, if they are working +people. As for the idle classes, they of course are to be allowed to +continue to make merry, 'drinking whisky, wine and sherry', to say +nothing of having their beer in by the barrel and the dozen--or forty +dozen--bottles. But of course that's a different matter, because these +people make so much money out of the labour of the working classes that +they can afford to indulge in this way without depriving their children +of the necessaries of life. + +There is no more cowardly, dastardly slander than is contained in the +assertion that the majority or any considerable proportion of working +men neglect their families through drink. It is a condemned lie. There +are some who do, but they are not even a large minority. They are few +and far between, and are regarded with contempt by their fellow workmen. + +It will be said that their families had to suffer for want of even the +little that most of them spent in that way: but the persons that use +this argument should carry it to its logical conclusion. Tea is an +unnecessary and harmful drink; it has been condemned by medical men so +often that to enumerate its evil qualities here would be waste of time. +The same can be said of nearly all the cheap temperance drinks; they +are unnecessary and harmful and cost money, and, like beer, are drunk +only for pleasure. + +What right has anyone to say to working men that when their work is +done they should not find pleasure in drinking a glass or two of beer +together in a tavern or anywhere else? Let those who would presume to +condemn them carry their argument to its logical conclusion and condemn +pleasure of every kind. Let them persuade the working classes to lead +still simpler lives; to drink water instead of such unwholesome things +as tea, coffee, beer, lemonade and all the other harmful and +unnecessary stuff. They would then be able to live ever so much more +cheaply, and as wages are always and everywhere regulated by the cost +of living, they would be able to work for lower pay. + +These people are fond of quoting the figures of the 'Nation's Drink +Bill,' as if all this money were spent by the working classes! But if +the amount of money spent in drink by the 'aristocracy', the clergy and +the middle classes were deducted from the 'Nation's Drink Bill', it +would be seen that the amount spent per head by the working classes is +not so alarming after all; and would probably not be much larger than +the amount spent on drink by those who consume tea and coffee and all +the other unwholesome and unnecessary 'temperance' drinks. + +The fact that some of Rushton's men spent about two shillings a week on +drink while they were in employment was not the cause of their poverty. +If they had never spent a farthing for drink, and if their wretched +wages had been increased fifty percent, they would still have been in a +condition of the most abject and miserable poverty, for nearly all the +benefits and privileges of civilization, nearly everything that makes +life worth living, would still have been beyond their reach. + +It is inevitable, so long as men have to live and work under such +heartbreaking, uninteresting conditions as at present that a certain +proportion of them will seek forgetfulness and momentary happiness in +the tavern, and the only remedy for this evil is to remove the cause; +and while that is in process, there is something else that can be done +and that is, instead of allowing filthy drinking dens, presided over by +persons whose interest it is to encourage men to drink more bad beer +than is good for them or than they can afford,--to have civilized +institutions run by the State or the municipalities for use and not +merely for profit. Decent pleasure houses, where no drunkenness or +filthiness would be tolerated--where one could buy real beer or coffee +or tea or any other refreshments; where men could repair when their +day's work was over and spend an hour or two in rational intercourse +with their fellows or listen to music and singing. Taverns to which +they could take their wives and children without fear of defilement, +for a place that is not fit for the presence of a woman or a child is +not fit to exist at all. + +Owen, being a teetotaller, did not spend any of his money on drink; but +he spent a lot on what he called 'The Cause'. Every week he bought +some penny or twopenny pamphlets or some leaflets about Socialism, +which he lent or gave to his mates; and in this way and by means of +much talk he succeeded in converting a few to his party. Philpot, +Harlow and a few others used to listen with interest, and some of them +even paid for the pamphlets they obtained from Owen, and after reading +them themselves, passed them on to others, and also occasionally 'got +up' arguments on their own accounts. Others were simply indifferent, +or treated the subject as a kind of joke, ridiculing the suggestion +that it was possible to abolish poverty. They repeated that there had +'always been rich and poor in the world and there always would be, so +there was an end of it'. But the majority were bitterly hostile; not +to Owen, but to Socialism. For the man himself most of them had a +certain amount of liking, especially the ordinary hands because it was +known that he was not a 'master's man' and that he had declined to +'take charge' of jobs which Misery had offered to him. But to +Socialism they were savagely and malignantly opposed. Some of those +who had shown some symptoms of Socialism during the past winter when +they were starving had now quite recovered and were stout defenders of +the Present System. + +Barrington was still working for the firm and continued to maintain his +manner of reserve, seldom speaking unless addressed but all the same, +for several reasons, it began to be rumoured that he shared Owen's +views. He always paid for the pamphlets that Owen gave him, and on one +occasion, when Owen bought a thousand leaflets to give away, Barrington +contributed a shilling towards the half-crown that Owen paid for them. +But he never took any part in the arguments that sometimes raged during +the dinner-hour or at breakfast-time. + +It was a good thing for Owen that he had his enthusiasm for 'the cause' +to occupy his mind. Socialism was to him what drink was to some of the +others--the thing that enable them to forget and tolerate the +conditions under which they were forced to exist. Some of them were so +muddled with beer, and others so besotted with admiration of their +Liberal and Tory masters, that they were oblivious of the misery of +their own lives, and in a similar way, Owen was so much occupied in +trying to rouse them from their lethargy and so engrossed in trying to +think out new arguments to convince them of the possibility of bringing +about an improvement in their condition that he had no time to dwell +upon his own poverty; the money that he spent on leaflets and pamphlets +to give away might have been better spent on food and clothing for +himself, because most of those to whom he gave them were by no means +grateful; but he never thought of that; and after all, nearly everyone +spends money on some hobby or other. Some people deny themselves the +necessaries or comforts of life in order that they may be able to help +to fatten a publican. Others deny themselves in order to enable a lazy +parson to live in idleness and luxury; and others spend much time and +money that they really need for themselves in buying Socialist +literature to give away to people who don't want to know about +Socialism. + +One Sunday morning towards the end of July, a band of about twenty-five +men and women on bicycles invaded the town. Two of them--who rode a +few yards in front of the others, had affixed to the handlebars of each +of their machines a slender, upright standard from the top of one of +which fluttered a small flag of crimson silk with 'International +Brotherhood and Peace' in gold letters. The other standard was similar +in size and colour, but with a different legend: 'One for all and All +for one.' + +As they rode along they gave leaflets to the people in the streets, and +whenever they came to a place where there were many people they +dismounted and walked about, giving their leaflets to whoever would +accept them. They made several long halts during their progress along +the Grand Parade, where there was a considerable crowd, and then they +rode over the hill to Windley, which they reached a little before +opening time. There were little crowds waiting outside the several +public houses and a number of people passing through the streets on +their way home from Church and Chapel. The strangers distributed +leaflets to all those who would take them, and they went through a lot +of the side streets, putting leaflets under the doors and in the +letter-boxes. When they had exhausted their stock they remounted and +rode back the way they came. + +Meantime the news of their arrival had spread, and as they returned +through the town they were greeted with jeers and booing. Presently +someone threw a stone, and as there happened to be plenty of stones +just there several others followed suit and began running after the +retreating cyclists, throwing stones, hooting and cursing. + +The leaflet which had given rise to all this fury read as follows: + + WHAT IS SOCIALISM? + + At present the workers, with hand and brain produce continually + food, clothing and all useful and beautiful things in great + abundance. + + BUT THEY LABOUR IN VAIN--for they are mostly poor and often in + want. They find it a hard struggle to live. Their women and + children suffer, and their old age is branded with pauperism. + + Socialism is a plan by which poverty will be abolished, and + everyone enabled to live in plenty and comfort, with leisure and + opportunity for ampler life. + + If you wish to hear more of this plan, come to the field at the + Cross Roads on the hill at Windley, on Tuesday evening next at 8 + P.M. and + + LOOK OUT FOR THE SOCIALIST VAN + +The cyclists rode away amid showers of stones without sustaining much +damage. One had his hand cut and another, who happened to look round, +was struck on the forehead, but these were the only casualties. + +On the following Tuesday evening, long before the appointed time, there +was a large crowd assembled at the cross roads or the hill at Windley, +waiting for the appearance of the van, and they were evidently prepared +to give the Socialists a warm reception. There was only one policeman +in uniform there but there were several in plain clothes amongst the +crowd. + +Crass, Dick Wantley, the Semi-drunk, Sawkins, Bill Bates and several +other frequenters of the Cricketers were amongst the crowd, and there +were also a sprinkling of tradespeople, including the Old Dear and Mr +Smallman, the grocer, and a few ladies and gentlemen--wealthy +visitors--but the bulk of the crowd were working men, labourers, +mechanics and boys. + +As it was quite evident that the crowd meant mischief--many of them had +their pockets filled with stones and were armed with sticks--several of +the Socialists were in favour of going to meet the van to endeavour to +persuade those in charge from coming, and with that object they +withdrew from the crowd, which was already regarding them with menacing +looks, and went down the road in the direction from which the van was +expected to come. They had not gone very far, however, before the +people, divining what they were going to do, began to follow them and +while they were hesitating what course to pursue, the Socialist van, +escorted by five or six men on bicycles, appeared round the corner at +the bottom of the hill. + +As soon as the crowd saw it, they gave an exultant cheer, or, rather, +yell, and began running down the hill to meet it, and in a few minutes +it was surrounded by a howling mob. The van was drawn by two horses; +there was a door and a small platform at the back and over this was a +sign with white letters on a red ground: 'Socialism, the only hope of +the Workers.' + +The driver pulled up, and another man on the platform at the rear +attempted to address the crowd, but his voice was inaudible in the din +of howls, catcalls, hooting and obscene curses. After about an hour of +this, as the crowd began pushing against the van and trying to overturn +it, the terrified horses commenced to get restive and uncontrollable, +and the man on the box attempted to drive up the hill. This seemed to +still further infuriate the horde of savages who surrounded the van. +Numbers of them clutched the wheels and turned them the reverse way, +screaming that it must go back to where it came from; several of them +accordingly seized the horses' heads and, amid cheers, turned them +round. + +The man on the platform was still trying to make himself heard, but +without success. The strangers who had come with the van and the +little group of local Socialists, who had forced their way through the +crowd and gathered together close to the platform in front of the +would-be speaker, only increased the din by their shouts of appeal to +the crowd to 'give the man a fair chance'. This little bodyguard +closed round the van as it began to move slowly downhill, but they were +not sufficiently numerous to protect it from the crowd, which, not +being satisfied with the rate at which the van was proceeding, began to +shout to each other to 'Run it away!' 'Take the brake off!' and several +savage rushes were made with the intention of putting these suggestions +into execution. + +Some of the defenders were hampered with their bicycles, but they +resisted as well as they were able, and succeeded in keeping the crowd +off until the foot of the hill was reached, and then someone threw the +first stone, which by a strange chance happened to strike one of the +cyclists whose head was already bandaged--it was the same man who had +been hit on the Sunday. This stone was soon followed by others, and +the man on the platform was the next to be struck. He got it right on +the mouth, and as he put up his handkerchief to staunch the blood +another struck him on the forehead just above the temple, and he +dropped forward on his face on to the platform as if he had been shot. + +As the speed of the vehicle increased, a regular hail of stones fell +upon the roof and against the sides of the van and whizzed past the +retreating cyclists, while the crowd followed close behind, cheering, +shrieking out volleys of obscene curses, and howling like wolves. + +'We'll give the b--rs Socialism!' shouted Crass, who was literally +foaming at the mouth. + +'We'll teach 'em to come 'ere trying to undermined our bloody +morality,' howled Dick Wantley as he hurled a lump of granite that he +had torn up from the macadamized road at one of the cyclists. + +They ran on after the van until it was out of range, and then they +bethought themselves of the local Socialists; but they were nowhere to +be seen; they had prudently withdrawn as soon as the van had got fairly +under way, and the victory being complete, the upholders of the present +system returned to the piece of waste ground on the top of the hill, +where a gentleman in a silk hat and frockcoat stood up on a little +hillock and made a speech. He said nothing about the Distress +Committee or the Soup Kitchen or the children who went to school +without proper clothes or food, and made no reference to what was to be +done next winter, when nearly everybody would be out of work. These +were matters he and they were evidently not at all interested in. But +he said a good deal about the Glorious Empire! and the Flag! and the +Royal Family. The things he said were received with rapturous +applause, and at the conclusion of his address, the crowd sang the +National Anthem with great enthusiasm and dispersed, congratulating +themselves that they had shown to the best of their ability what +Mugsborough thought of Socialism and the general opinion of the crowd +was that they would hear nothing more from the Socialist van. + +But in this they were mistaken, for the very next Sunday evening a +crowd of Socialists suddenly materialized at the Cross Roads. Some of +them had come by train, others had walked from different places and +some had cycled. + +A crowd gathered and the Socialists held a meeting, two speeches being +delivered before the crowd recovered from their surprise at the +temerity of these other Britishers who apparently had not sense enough +to understand that they had been finally defeated and obliterated last +Tuesday evening: and when the cyclist with the bandaged head got up on +the hillock some of the crowd actually joined in the hand-clapping with +which the Socialists greeted him. + +In the course of his speech he informed them that the man who had come +with the van and who had been felled whilst attempting to speak from +the platform was now in hospital. For some time it had been probable +that he would not recover, but he was now out of danger, and as soon as +he was well enough there was no doubt that he would come there again. + +Upon this Crass shouted out that if ever the Vanners did return, they +would finish what they had begun last Tuesday. He would not get off so +easy next time. But when he said this, Crass--not being able to see +into the future--did not know what the reader will learn in due time, +that the man was to return to that place under different circumstances. + +When they had finished their speech-making one of the strangers who was +acting as chairman invited the audience to put questions, but as nobody +wanted to ask any, he invited anyone who disagreed with what had been +said to get up on the hillock and state his objections, so that the +audience might have an opportunity of judging for themselves which side +was right; but this invitation was also neglected. Then the chairman +announced that they were coming there again next Sunday at the same +time, when a comrade would speak on 'Unemployment and Poverty, the +Cause and the Remedy', and then the strangers sang a song called +'England Arise', the first verse being: + + England Arise, the long, long night is over, + Faint in the east, behold the Dawn appear + Out of your evil dream of toil and sorrow + Arise, O England! for the day is here! + +During the progress of the meeting several of the strangers had been +going out amongst the crowd giving away leaflets, which many of the +people gloomily refused to accept, and selling penny pamphlets, of +which they managed to dispose of about three dozen. + +Before declaring the meeting closed, the chairman said that the speaker +who was coming next week resided in London: he was not a millionaire, +but a workman, the same as nearly all those who were there present. +They were not going to pay him anything for coming, but they intended +to pay his railway fare. Therefore next Sunday after the meeting there +would be a collection, and anything over the amount of the fare would +be used for the purchase of more leaflets such as those they were now +giving away. He hoped that anyone who thought that any of the money +went into the pockets of those who held the meeting would come and +join: then they could have their share. + +The meeting now terminated and the Socialists were suffered to depart +in peace. Some of them, however, lingered amongst the crowd after the +main body had departed, and for a long time after the meeting was over +little groups remained on the field excitedly discussing the speeches +or the leaflets. + +The next Sunday evening when the Socialists came they found the field +at the Cross Roads in the possession of a furious, hostile mob, who +refused to allow them to speak, and finally they had to go away without +having held a meeting. They came again the next Sunday, and on this +occasion they had a speaker with a very loud--literally a +stentorian--voice, and he succeeded in delivering an address, but as +only those who were very close were able to hear him, and as they were +all Socialists, it was not of much effect upon those for whom it was +intended. + +They came again the next Sunday and nearly every other Sunday during +the summer: sometimes they were permitted to hold their meeting in +comparative peace and at other times there was a row. They made +several converts, and many people declared themselves in favour of some +of the things advocated, but they were never able to form a branch of +their society there, because nearly all those who were convinced were +afraid to publicly declare themselves lest they should lose their +employment or customers. + + + +Chapter 44 + +The Beano + + +Now and then a transient gleam of sunshine penetrated the gloom in +which the lives of the philanthropists were passed. The cheerless +monotony was sometimes enlivened with a little innocent merriment. +Every now and then there was a funeral which took Misery and Crass away +for the whole afternoon, and although they always tried to keep the +dates secret, the men generally knew when they were gone. + +Sometimes the people in whose houses they were working regaled them +with tea, bread and butter, cake or other light refreshments, and +occasionally even with beer--very different stuff from the petrifying +liquid they bought at the Cricketers for twopence a pint. At other +places, where the people of the house were not so generously disposed, +the servants made up for it, and entertained them in a similar manner +without the knowledge of their masters and mistresses. Even when the +mistresses were too cunning to permit of this, they were seldom able to +prevent the men from embracing the domestics, who for their part were +quite often willing to be embraced; it was an agreeable episode that +helped to vary the monotony of their lives, and there was no harm done. + +It was rather hard lines on the philanthropists sometimes when they +happened to be working in inhabited houses of the better sort. They +always had to go in and out by the back way, generally through the +kitchen, and the crackling and hissing of the poultry and the joints of +meat roasting in the ovens, and the odours of fruit pies and tarts, and +plum puddings and sage and onions, were simply maddening. In the +back-yards of these houses there were usually huge stacks of empty +beer, stout and wine bottles, and others that had contained whisky, +brandy or champagne. + +The smells of the delicious viands that were being prepared in the +kitchen often penetrated into the dismantled rooms that the +philanthropists were renovating, sometimes just as they were eating +their own wretched fare out of their dinner basket, and washing it down +with draughts of the cold tea or the petrifying liquid they sometimes +brought with them in bottles. + +Sometimes, as has been said, the people of the house used to send up +some tea and bread and butter or cakes or other refreshments to the +workmen, but whenever Hunter got to know of it being done he used to +speak to the people about it and request that it be discontinued, as it +caused the men to waste their time. + +But the event of the year was the Beano, which took place on the last +Saturday in August, after they had been paying in for about four +months. The cost of the outing was to be five shillings a head, so +this was the amount each man had to pay in, but it was expected that +the total cost--the hire of the brakes and the cost of the +dinner--would come out at a trifle less than the amount stated, and in +that case the surplus would be shared out after the dinner. The amount +of the share-out would be greater or less according to other +circumstances, for it generally happened that apart from the +subscriptions of the men, the Beano fund was swelled by charitable +donations from several quarters, as will be seen later on. + +When the eventful day arrived, the hands, instead of working till one, +were paid at twelve o'clock and rushed off home to have a wash and +change. + +The brakes were to start from the 'Cricketers' at one, but it was +arranged, for the convenience of those who lived at Windley, that they +were to be picked up at the Cross Roads at one-thirty. + +There were four brakes altogether--three large ones for the men and one +small one for the accommodation of Mr Rushton and a few of his personal +friends, Didlum, Grinder, Mr Toonarf, an architect and Mr Lettum, a +house and estate Agent. One of the drivers was accompanied by a friend +who carried a long coachman's horn. This gentleman was not paid to +come, but, being out of work, he thought that the men would be sure to +stand him a few drinks and that they would probably make a collection +for him in return for his services. + +Most of the chaps were smoking twopenny cigars, and had one or two +drinks with each other to try to cheer themselves up before they +started, but all the same it was a melancholy procession that wended +its way up the hill to Windley. To judge from the mournful expression +on the long face of Misery, who sat on the box beside the driver of the +first large brake, and the downcast appearance of the majority of the +men, one might have thought that it was a funeral rather than a +pleasure party, or that they were a contingent of lost souls being +conducted to the banks of the Styx. The man who from time to time +sounded the coachman's horn might have passed as the angel sounding the +last trump, and the fumes of the cigars were typical of the smoke of +their torment, which ascendeth up for ever and ever. + +A brief halt was made at the Cross Roads to pick up several of the men, +including Philpot, Harlow, Easton, Ned Dawson, Sawkins, Bill Bates and +the Semi-drunk. The two last-named were now working for Smeariton and +Leavit, but as they had been paying in from the first, they had elected +to go to the Beano rather than have their money back. The Semi-drunk +and one or two other habitual boozers were very shabby and down at +heel, but the majority of the men were decently dressed. Some had taken +their Sunday clothes out of pawn especially for the occasion. Others +were arrayed in new suits which they were going to pay for at the rate +of a shilling a week. Some had bought themselves second-hand suits, +one or two were wearing their working clothes brushed and cleaned up, +and some were wearing Sunday clothes that had not been taken out of +pawn for the simple reason that the pawnbrokers would not take them in. +These garments were in what might be called a transition +stage--old-fashioned and shiny with wear, but yet too good to take for +working in, even if their owners had been in a position to buy some +others to take their place for best. Crass, Slyme and one or two of +the single men, however, were howling swells, sporting stand-up collars +and bowler hats of the latest type, in contradistinction to some of the +others, who were wearing hats of antique patterns, and collars of +various shapes with jagged edges. Harlow had on an old straw hat that +his wife had cleaned up with oxalic acid, and Easton had carefully dyed +the faded binding of his black bowler with ink. Their boots were the +worst part of their attire: without counting Rushton and his friends, +there were thirty-seven men altogether, including Nimrod, and there +were not half a dozen pairs of really good boots amongst the whole +crowd. + +When all were seated a fresh start was made. The small brake, with +Rushton, Didlum, Grinder and two or three other members of the Band, +led the way. Next came the largest brake with Misery on the box. +Beside the driver of the third brake was Payne, the foreman carpenter. +Crass occupied a similar position of honour on the fourth brake, on the +back step of which was perched the man with the coachman's horn. + +Crass--who had engaged the brakes--had arranged with the drivers that +the cortege should pass through the street where he and Easton lived, +and as they went by Mrs Crass was standing at the door with the two +young men lodgers, who waved their handkerchiefs and shouted greetings. +A little further on Mrs Linden and Easton's wife were standing at the +door to see them go by. In fact, the notes of the coachman's horn +alarmed most of the inhabitants, who crowded to their windows and doors +to gaze upon the dismal procession as it passed. + +The mean streets of Windley were soon left far behind and they found +themselves journeying along a sunlit, winding road, bordered with +hedges of hawthorn, holly and briar, past rich, brown fields of +standing corn, shimmering with gleams of gold, past apple-orchards +where bending boughs were heavily loaded with mellow fruits exhaling +fragrant odours, through the cool shades of lofty avenues of venerable +oaks, whose overarched and interlacing branches formed a roof of green, +gilt and illuminated with quivering spots and shafts of sunlight that +filtered through the trembling leaves; over old mossy stone bridges, +spanning limpid streams that duplicated the blue sky and the fleecy +clouds; and then again, stretching away to the horizon on every side +over more fields, some rich with harvest, others filled with drowsing +cattle or with flocks of timid sheep that scampered away at the sound +of the passing carriages. Several times they saw merry little +companies of rabbits frisking gaily in and out of the hedges or in the +fields beside the sheep and cattle. At intervals, away in the +distance, nestling in the hollows or amid sheltering trees, groups of +farm buildings and stacks of hay; and further on, the square ivy-clad +tower of an ancient church, or perhaps a solitary windmill with its +revolving sails alternately flashing and darkening in the rays of the +sun. Past thatched wayside cottages whose inhabitants came out to wave +their hands in friendly greeting. Past groups of sunburnt, +golden-haired children who climbed on fences and five-barred gates, and +waved their hats and cheered, or ran behind the brakes for the pennies +the men threw down to them. + +From time to time the men in the brakes made half-hearted attempts at +singing, but it never came to much, because most of them were too +hungry and miserable. They had not had time to take any dinner and +would not have taken any even if they had the time, for they wished to +reserve their appetites for the banquet at the Queen Elizabeth, which +they expected to reach about half past three. However, they cheered up +a little after the first halt--at the Blue Lion, where most of them got +down and had a drink. Some of them, including the Semi-drunk, Ned +Dawson, Bill Bates and Joe Philpot--had two or three drinks, and felt +so much happier for them that, shortly after they started off again, +sounds of melody were heard from the brake the three first named rode +in--the one presided over by Crass--but it was not very successful, and +even after the second halt--about five miles further on--at the +Warrior's Head, they found it impossible to sing with any heartiness. +Fitful bursts of song arose from time to time from each of the brakes +in turn, only to die mournfully away. It is not easy to sing on an +empty stomach even if one has got a little beer in it; and so it was +with most of them. They were not in a mood to sing, or to properly +appreciate the scenes through which they were passing. They wanted +their dinners, and that was the reason why this long ride, instead of +being a pleasure, became after a while, a weary journey that seemed as +if it were never coming to an end. + +The next stop was at the Bird in Hand, a wayside public house that +stood all by itself in a lonely hollow. The landlord was a fat, +jolly-looking man, and there were several customers in the bar--men who +looked like farm-labourers, but there were no other houses to be seen +anywhere. This extraordinary circumstance exercised the minds of our +travellers and formed the principal topic of conversation until they +arrived at the Dew Drop Inn, about half an hour afterwards. The first +brake, containing Rushton and his friends, passed on without stopping +here. The occupants of the second brake, which was only a little way +behind the first, were divided in opinion whether to stop or go on. +Some shouted out to the driver to pull up, others ordered him to +proceed, and more were undecided which course to pursue--a state of +mind that was not shared by the coachman, who, knowing that if they +stopped somebody or other would be sure to stand him a drink, had no +difficulty whatever in coming to a decision, but drew rein at the inn, +an example that was followed by both the other carriages as they drove +up. + +It was a very brief halt, not more than half the men getting down at +all, and those who remained in the brakes grumbled so much at the delay +that the others drank their beer as quickly as possible and the journey +was resumed once more, almost in silence. No attempts at singing, no +noisy laughter; they scarcely spoke to each other, but sat gloomily +gazing out over the surrounding country. + +Instructions had been given to the drivers not to stop again till they +reached the Queen Elizabeth, and they therefore drove past the World +Turned Upside Down without stopping, much to the chagrin of the +landlord of that house, who stood at the door with a sickly smile upon +his face. Some of those who knew him shouted out that they would give +him a call on their way back, and with this he had to be content. + +They reached the long-desired Queen Elizabeth at twenty minutes to +four, and were immediately ushered into a large room where a round +table and two long ones were set for dinner--and they were set in a +manner worthy of the reputation of the house. + +The cloths that covered the tables and the serviettes, arranged fanwise +in the drinking glasses, were literally as white as snow, and about a +dozen knives and forks and spoons were laid for each person. Down the +centre of the table glasses of delicious yellow custard and cut-glass +dishes of glistening red and golden jelly alternated with vases of +sweet-smelling flowers. + +The floor of the dining-room was covered with oilcloth--red flowers on +a pale yellow ground; the pattern was worn off in places, but it was +all very clean and shining. Whether one looked at the walls with the +old-fashioned varnished oak paper, or at the glossy piano standing +across the corner near the white-curtained window, at the shining oak +chairs or through the open casement doors that led into the shady +garden beyond, the dominating impression one received was that +everything was exquisitely clean. + +The landlord announced that dinner would be served in ten minutes, and +while they were waiting some of them indulged in a drink at the +bar--just as an appetizer--whilst the others strolled in the garden or, +by the landlord's invitation, looked over the house. Amongst other +places, they glanced into the kitchen, where the landlady was +superintending the preparation of the feast, and in this place, with +its whitewashed walls and red-tiled floor, as in every other part of +the house, the same absolute cleanliness reigned supreme. + +'It's a bit differint from the Royal Caff, where we got the sack, ain't +it?' remarked the Semi-drunk to Bill Bates as they made their way to +the dining-room in response to the announcement that dinner was ready. + +'Not arf!' replied Bill. + +Rushton, with Didlum and Grinder and his other friends, sat at the +round table near the piano. Hunter took the head of the longer of the +other two tables and Crass the foot, and on either side of Crass were +Bundy and Slyme, who had acted with him as the Committee who had +arranged the Beano. Payne, the foreman carpenter, occupied the head of +the other table. + +The dinner was all that could be desired; it was almost as good as the +kind of dinner that is enjoyed every day by those persons who are too +lazy to work but are cunning enough to make others work for them. + +There was soup, several entrees, roast beef, boiled mutton, roast +turkey, roast goose, ham, cabbage, peas, beans and sweets galore, plum +pudding, custard, jelly, fruit tarts, bread and cheese and as much beer +or lemonade as they liked to pay for, the drinks being an extra; and +afterwards the waiters brought in cups of coffee for those who desired +it. Everything was up to the knocker, and although they were somewhat +bewildered by the multitude of knives and forks, they all, with one or +two exceptions, rose to the occasion and enjoyed themselves famously. +The excellent decorum observed being marred only by one or two +regrettable incidents. The first of these occurred almost as soon as +they sat down, when Ned Dawson who, although a big strong fellow, was +not able to stand much beer, not being used to it, was taken ill and +had to be escorted from the room by his mate Bundy and another man. +They left him somewhere outside and he came back again about ten +minutes afterwards, much better but looking rather pale, and took his +seat with the others. + +The turkeys, the roast beef and the boiled mutton, the peas and beans +and the cabbage, disappeared with astonishing rapidity, which was not +to be wondered at, for they were all very hungry from the long drive, +and nearly everyone made a point of having at least one helping of +everything there was to be had. Some of them went in for two lots of +soup. Then for the next course, boiled mutton and ham or turkey: then +some roast beef and goose. Then a little more boiled mutton with a +little roast beef. Each of the three boys devoured several times his +own weight of everything, to say nothing of numerous bottles of +lemonade and champagne ginger beer. + +Crass frequently paused to mop the perspiration from his face and neck +with his serviette. In fact everybody had a good time. There was +enough and to spare of everything to eat, the beer was of the best, and +all the time, amid the rattle of the crockery and the knives and forks, +the proceedings were enlivened by many jests and flashes of wit that +continuously kept the table in a roar. + +'Chuck us over another dollop of that there white stuff, Bob,' shouted +the Semi-drunk to Crass, indicating the blancmange. + +Crass reached out his hand and took hold of the dish containing the +'white stuff', but instead of passing it to the Semi-drunk, he +proceeded to demolish it himself, gobbling it up quickly directly from +the dish with a spoon. + +'Why, you're eating it all yerself, yer bleeder,' cried the Semi-drunk +indignantly, as soon as he realized what was happening. + +'That's all right, matey,' replied Crass affably as he deposited the +empty dish on the table. 'It don't matter, there's plenty more where +it come from. Tell the landlord to bring in another lot.' + +Upon being applied to, the landlord, who was assisted by his daughter, +two other young women and two young men, brought in several more lots +and so the Semi-drunk was appeased. + +As for the plum-pudding--it was a fair knock-out; just like Christmas: +but as Ned Dawson and Bill Bates had drunk all the sauce before the +pudding was served, they all had to have their first helping without +any. However, as the landlord brought in another lot shortly +afterwards, that didn't matter either. + +As soon as dinner was over, Crass rose to make his statement as +secretary. Thirty-seven men had paid five shillings each: that made +nine pounds five shillings. The committee had decided that the three +boys--the painters' boy, the carpenters' boy and the front shop +boy--should be allowed to come half-price: that made it nine pounds +twelve and six. In addition to paying the ordinary five-shilling +subscription, Mr Rushton had given one pound ten towards the expenses. +(Loud cheers.) And several other gentlemen had also given something +towards it. Mr Sweater, of the Cave, one pound. (Applause.) Mr +Grinder, ten shillings in addition to the five-shilling subscription. +(Applause.) Mr Lettum, ten shillings, as well as the five-shilling +subscription. (Applause.) Mr Didlum, ten shillings in addition to the +five shillings. (Cheers.) Mr Toonarf, ten shillings as well as the +five-shilling subscription. They had also written to some of the +manufacturers who supplied the firm with materials, and asked them to +give something: some of 'em had sent half a crown, some five shillings, +some hadn't answered at all, and two of 'em had written back to say +that as things is cut so fine nowadays, they didn't hardly get no +profit on their stuff, so they couldn't afford to give nothing; but out +of all the firms they wrote to they managed to get thirty-two and +sixpence altogether, making a grand total of seventeen pounds. + +As for the expenses, the dinner was two and six a head, and there was +forty-five of them there, so that came to five pounds twelve and six. +Then there was the hire of the brakes, also two and six a head, five +pound twelve and six, which left a surplus of five pound fifteen to be +shared out (applause), which came to three shillings each for the +thirty-seven men, and one and fourpence for each of the boys. (Loud +and prolonged cheers.) + +Crass, Slyme and Bundy now walked round the tables distributing the +share-out, which was very welcome to everybody, especially those who +had spent nearly all their money during the journey from Mugsborough, +and when this ceremony was completed, Philpot moved a hearty vote of +thanks to the committee for the manner in which they had carried out +their duties, which was agreed to with acclamation. Then they made a +collection for the waiters, and the three waitresses, which amounted to +eleven shillings, for which the host returned thanks on behalf of the +recipients, who were all smiles. + +Then Mr Rushton requested the landlord to serve drinks and cigars all +round. Some had cigarettes and the teetotallers had lemonade or ginger +beer. Those who did not smoke themselves took the cigar all the same +and gave it to someone else who did. When all were supplied there +suddenly arose loud cries of 'Order!' and it was seen that Hunter was +upon his feet. + +As soon as silence was obtained, Misery said that he believed that +everyone there present would agree with him, when he said that they +should not let the occasion pass without drinking the 'ealth of their +esteemed and respected employer, Mr Rushton. (Hear, hear.) Some of +them had worked for Mr Rushton on and off for many years, and as far as +THEY was concerned it was not necessary for him (Hunter) to say much in +praise of Mr Rushton. (Hear, hear.) They knew Mr Rushton as well as +he did himself and to know him was to esteem him. (Cheers.) As for the +new hands, although they did not know Mr Rushton as well as the old +hands did, he felt sure that they would agree that as no one could wish +for a better master. (Loud applause.) He had much pleasure in asking +them to drink Mr Rushton's health. Everyone rose. + +'Musical honours, chaps,' shouted Crass, waving his glass and leading +off the singing which was immediately joined in with great enthusiasm +by most of the men, the Semi-drunk conducting the music with a table +knife: + + For he's a jolly good fellow, + For he's a jolly good fellow, + For he's a jolly good fel-ell-O, + And so say all of us, + So 'ip, 'ip, 'ip, 'ooray! + So 'ip, 'ip, 'ip, 'ooray! + + For he's a jolly good fellow, + For 'e's a jolly good fellow + For 'e's a jolly good fel-ell-O, + And so say all of us. + +'Now three cheers!' shouted Crass, leading off. + + Hip, hip, hip, hooray! + Hip, hip, hip, hooray! + Hip, hip, hip, hooray! + +Everyone present drank Rushton's health, or at any rate went through +the motions of doing so, but during the roar of cheering and singing +that preceded it several of the men stood with expressions of contempt +or uneasiness upon their faces, silently watching the enthusiasts or +looking at the ceiling or on the floor. + +'I will say this much,' remarked the Semidrunk as they all resumed +their seats--he had had several drinks during dinner, besides those he +had taken on the journey--I will say this much, although I did have a +little misunderstanding with Mr Hunter when I was workin' at the Royal +Caff, I must admit that this is the best firm that's ever worked under +me.' + +This statement caused a shout of laughter, which, however, died away as +Mr Rushton rose to acknowledge the toast to his health. He said that +he had now been in business for nearly sixteen years and this was--he +believed--the eleventh outing he had had the pleasure of attending. +During all that time the business had steadily progressed and had +increased in volume from year to year, and he hoped and believed that +the progress made in the past would be continued in the future. (Hear, +hear.) Of course, he realized that the success of the business +depended very largely upon the men as well as upon himself; he did his +best in trying to get work for them, and it was necessary--if the +business was to go on and prosper--that they should also do their best +to get the work done when he had secured it for them. (Hear, hear.) +The masters could not do without the men, and the men could not live +without the masters. (Hear, hear.) It was a matter of division of +labour: the men worked with their hands and the masters worked with +their brains, and one was no use without the other. He hoped the good +feeling which had hitherto existed between himself and his workmen +would always continue, and he thanked them for the way in which they +had responded to the toast of his health. + +Loud cheers greeted the conclusion of this speech, and then Crass stood +up and said that he begged to propose the health of Mr 'Unter. (Hear, +hear.) He wasn't going to make a long speech as he wasn't much of a +speaker. (Cries of 'You're all right,' 'Go on,' etc.) But he felt +sure as they would all hagree with him when he said that--next to Mr +Rushton--there wasn't no one the men had more respect and liking for +than Mr 'Unter. (Cheers.) A few weeks ago when Mr 'Unter was laid up, +many of them began to be afraid as they was going to lose 'im. He was +sure that all the 'ands was glad to 'ave this hoppertunity of +congratulating him on his recovery (Hear, hear) and of wishing him the +best of 'ealth in the future and hoping as he would be spared to come +to a good many more Beanos. + +Loud applause greeted the conclusion of Crass's remarks, and once more +the meeting burst into song: + + For he's a jolly good fellow + For he's a jolly good fellow. + For he's a jolly good fellow, + And so say all of us. + So 'ip, 'ip, 'ip, 'ooray! + So 'ip, 'ip, 'ip, 'ooray! + +When they had done cheering, Nimrod rose. His voice trembled a little +as he thanked them for their kindness, and said that he hoped he +deserved their goodwill. He could only say that as he was sure as he +always tried to be fair and considerate to everyone. (Cheers.) He +would now request the landlord to replenish their glasses. (Hear, +hear.) + +As soon as the drinks were served, Nimrod again rose and said he wished +to propose the healths of their visitors who had so kindly contributed +to their expenses--Mr Lettum, Mr Didlum, Mr Toonarf and Mr Grinder. +(Cheers.) They were very pleased and proud to see them there (Hear, +hear), and he was sure the men would agree with him when he said that +Messrs Lettum, Didlum, Toonarf and Grinder were jolly good fellows. + +To judge from the manner in which they sang the chorus and cheered, it +was quite evident that most of the hands did agree. When they left +off, Grinder rose to reply on behalf of those included in the toast. He +said that it gave them much pleasure to be there and take part in such +pleasant proceedings and they were glad to think that they had been +able to help to bring it about. It was very gratifying to see the good +feeling that existed between Mr Rushton and his workmen, which was as +it should be, because masters and men was really fellow workers--the +masters did the brain work, the men the 'and work. They was both +workers, and their interests was the same. He liked to see men doing +their best for their master and knowing that their master was doing his +best for them, that he was not only a master, but a friend. That was +what he (Grinder) liked to see--master and men pulling together--doing +their best, and realizing that their interests was identical. +(Cheers.) If only all masters and men would do this they would find +that everything would go on all right, there would be more work and +less poverty. Let the men do their best for their masters, and the +masters do their best for their men, and they would find that that was +the true solution of the social problem, and not the silly nonsense +that was talked by people what went about with red flags. (Cheers and +laughter.) Most of those fellows were chaps who was too lazy to work +for their livin'. (Hear, hear.) They could take it from him that, if +ever the Socialists got the upper hand there would just be a few of the +hartful dodgers who would get all the cream, and there would be nothing +left but 'ard work for the rest. (Hear. hear.) That's wot hall those +hagitators was after: they wanted them (his hearers) to work and keep +'em in idleness. (Hear, hear.) On behalf of Mr Didlum, Mr Toonarf, Mr +Lettum and himself, he thanked them for their good wishes, and hoped to +be with them on a sim'ler occasion in the future. + +Loud cheers greeted the termination of his speech, but it was obvious +from some of the men's faces that they resented Grinder's remarks. +These men ridiculed Socialism and regularly voted for the continuance +of capitalism, and yet they were disgusted and angry with Grinder! +There was also a small number of Socialists--not more than half a dozen +altogether--who did not join in the applause. These men were all +sitting at the end of the long table presided over by Payne. None of +them had joined in the applause that greeted the speeches, and so far +neither had they made any protest. Some of them turned very red as +they listened to the concluding sentences of Grinder's oration, and +others laughed, but none of them said anything. They knew before they +came that there was sure to be a lot of 'Jolly good fellow' business +and speechmaking, and they had agreed together beforehand to take no +part one way or the other, and to refrain from openly dissenting from +anything that might be said, but they had not anticipated anything +quite so strong as this. + +When Grinder sat down some of those who had applauded him began to jeer +at the Socialists. + +'What have you got to say to that?' they shouted. 'That's up against +yer!' + +'They ain't got nothing to say now.' + +'Why don't some of you get up and make a speech?' + +This last appeared to be a very good idea to those Liberals and Tories +who had not liked Grinder's observations, so they all began to shout +'Owen!' 'Owen!' 'Come on 'ere. Get up and make a speech!' 'Be a man!' +and so on. Several of those who had been loudest in applauding Grinder +also joined in the demand that Owen should make a speech, because they +were certain that Grinder and the other gentlemen would be able to +dispose of all his arguments; but Owen and the other Socialists made no +response except to laugh, so presently Crass tied a white handkerchief +on a cane walking-stick that belonged to Mr Didlum, and stuck it in the +vase of flowers that stood on the end of the table where the Socialist +group were sitting. + +When the noise had in some measure ceased, Grinder again rose. 'When I +made the few remarks that I did, I didn't know as there was any +Socialists 'ere: I could tell from the look of you that most of you had +more sense. At the same time I'm rather glad I said what I did, +because it just shows you what sort of chaps these Socialists are. +They're pretty artful--they know when to talk and when to keep their +mouths shut. What they like is to get hold of a few ignorant workin' +men in a workshop or a public house, and then they can talk by the +mile--reg'ler shop lawyers, you know wot I mean--I'm right and +everybody else is wrong. (Laughter.) You know the sort of thing I +mean. When they finds theirselves in the company of edicated people +wot knows a little more than they does theirselves, and who isn't +likely to be misled by a lot of claptrap, why then, mum's the word. So +next time you hears any of these shop lawyers' arguments, you'll know +how much it's worth.' + +Most of the men were delighted with this speech, which was received +with much laughing and knocking on the tables. They remarked to each +other that Grinder was a smart man: he'd got the Socialists weighed up +just about right--to an ounce. + +Then, it was seen that Barrington was on his feet facing Grinder and a +sudden, awe-filled silence fell. + +'It may or may not be true,' began Barrington, 'that Socialists always +know when to speak and when to keep silent, but the present occasion +hardly seemed a suitable one to discuss such subjects. + +'We are here today as friends and want to forget our differences and +enjoy ourselves for a few hours. But after what Mr Grinder has said I +am quite ready to reply to him to the best of my ability. + +'The fact that I am a Socialist and that I am here today as one of Mr +Rushton's employees should be an answer to the charge that Socialists +are too lazy to work for their living. And as to taking advantage of +the ignorance and simplicity of working men and trying to mislead them +with nonsensical claptrap, it would have been more to the point if Mr +Grinder had taken some particular Socialist doctrine and had proved it +to be untrue or misleading, instead of adopting the cowardly method of +making vague general charges that he cannot substantiate. He would +find it far more difficult to do that than it would be for a Socialist +to show that most of what Mr Grinder himself has been telling us is +nonsensical claptrap of the most misleading kind. He tells us that the +employers work with their brains and the men with their hands. If it +is true that no brains are required to do manual labour, why put idiots +into imbecile asylums? Why not let them do some of the hand work for +which no brains are required? As they are idiots, they would probably +be willing to work for even less than the ideal "living wage". If Mr +Grinder had ever tried, he would know that manual workers have to +concentrate their minds and their attention on their work or they would +not be able to do it at all. His talk about employers being not only +the masters but the "friends" of their workmen is also mere claptrap +because he knows as well as we do, that no matter how good or +benevolent an employer may be, no matter how much he might desire to +give his men good conditions, it is impossible for him to do so, +because he has to compete against other employers who do not do that. +It is the bad employer--the sweating, slave-driving employer--who sets +the pace and the others have to adopt the same methods--very often +against their inclinations--or they would not be able to compete with +him. If any employer today were to resolve to pay his workmen not less +wages than he would be able to live upon in comfort himself, that he +would not require them to do more work in a day than he himself would +like to perform every day of his own life, Mr Grinder knows as well as +we do that such an employer would be bankrupt in a month; because he +would not be able to get any work except by taking it at the same price +as the sweaters and the slave-drivers. + +'He also tells us that the interests of masters and men are identical; +but if an employer has a contract, it is to his interest to get the +work done as soon as possible; the sooner it is done the more profit he +will make; but the more quickly it is done, the sooner will the men be +out of employment. How then can it be true that their interests are +identical? + +'Again, let us suppose that an employer is, say, thirty years of age +when he commences business, and that he carries it on for twenty years. +Let us assume that he employs forty men more or less regularly during +that period and that the average age of these men is also thirty years +at the time the employer commences business. At the end of the twenty +years it usually happens that the employer has made enough money to +enable him to live for the remainder of his life in ease and comfort. +But what about the workman? All through those twenty years they have +earned but a bare living wage and have had to endure such privations +that those who are not already dead are broken in health. + +'In the case of the employer there had been twenty years of steady +progress towards ease and leisure and independence. In the case of the +majority of the men there were twenty years of deterioration, twenty +years of steady, continuous and hopeless progress towards physical and +mental inefficiency: towards the scrap-heap, the work-house, and +premature death. What is it but false, misleading, nonsensical +claptrap to say that their interests were identical with those of their +employer? + +'Such talk as that is not likely to deceive any but children or fools. +We are not children, but it is very evident that Mr Grinder thinks that +we are fools. + +'Occasionally it happens, through one or more of a hundred different +circumstances over which he has no control, or through some error of +judgement, that after many years of laborious mental work an employer +is overtaken by misfortune, and finds himself no better and even worse +off than when he started; but these are exceptional cases, and even if +he becomes absolutely bankrupt he is no worse off than the majority of +the workmen. + +'At the same time it is quite true that the real interests of employers +and workmen are the same, but not in the sense that Mr Grinder would +have us believe. Under the existing system of society but a very few +people, no matter how well off they may be, can be certain that they or +their children will not eventually come to want; and even those who +think they are secure themselves, find their happiness diminished by +the knowledge of the poverty and misery that surrounds them on every +side. + +'In that sense only is it true that the interests of masters and men +are identical, for it is to the interest of all, both rich and poor, to +help to destroy a system that inflicts suffering upon the many and +allows true happiness to none. It is to the interest of all to try and +find a better way.' + +Here Crass jumped up and interrupted, shouting out that they hadn't +come there to listen to a lot of speechmaking--a remark that was +greeted with unbounded applause by most of those present. Loud cries +of 'Hear, hear!' resounded through the room, and the Semi-drunk +suggested that someone should sing a song. + +The men who had clamoured for a speech from Owen said nothing, and Mr +Grinder, who had been feeling rather uncomfortable, was secretly very +glad of the interruption. + +The Semi-drunk's suggestion that someone should sing a song was +received with unqualified approbation by everybody, including +Barrington and the other Socialists, who desired nothing better than +that the time should be passed in a manner suitable to the occasion. +The landlord's daughter, a rosy girl of about twenty years of age, in a +pink print dress, sat down at the piano, and the Semi-drunk, taking his +place at the side of the instrument and facing the audience, sang the +first song with appropriate gestures, the chorus being rendered +enthusiastically by the full strength of the company, including Misery, +who by this time was slightly drunk from drinking gin and ginger beer: + + 'Come, come, come an' 'ave a drink with me + Down by the ole Bull and Bush. + Come, come, come an' shake 'ands with me + Down by the ole Bull and Bush. + Wot cheer me little Germin band! + Fol the diddle di do! + Come an' take 'old of me 'and + Come, come, come an' 'ave a drink with me, + Down by the old Bull and Bush, + Bush! Bush!' + +Protracted knocking on the tables greeted the end of the song, but as +the Semi-drunk knew no other except odd verses and choruses, he called +upon Crass for the next, and that gentleman accordingly sang 'Work, +Boys, Work' to the tune of 'Tramp, tramp, tramp, the boys are +marching'. As this song is the Marseillaise of the Tariff Reform +Party, voicing as it does the highest ideals of the Tory workmen of +this country, it was an unqualified success, for most of them were +Conservatives. + + 'Now I'm not a wealthy man, + But I lives upon a plan + Wot will render me as 'appy as a King; + An' if you will allow, I'll sing it to you now, + For time you know is always on the wing. + + Work, boys, work and be contented + So long as you've enough to buy a meal. + For if you will but try, you'll be wealthy--bye and bye-- + If you'll only put yer shoulder to the wheel.' + +'Altogether, boys,' shouted Grinder, who was a strong Tariff Reformer, +and was delighted to see that most of the men were of the same way of +thinking; and the 'boys' roared out the chorus once more: + + Work, boys, work and be contented + So long as you've enough to buy a meal + For if you will but try, you'll be wealthy--bye and bye + If you'll only put your shoulder to the wheel. + +As they sang the words of this noble chorus the Tories seemed to become +inspired with lofty enthusiasm. It is of course impossible to say for +certain, but probably as they sang there arose before their exalted +imaginations, a vision of the Past, and looking down the long vista of +the years that were gone, they saw that from their childhood they had +been years of poverty and joyless toil. They saw their fathers and +mothers, weaned and broken with privation and excessive labour, sinking +unhonoured into the welcome oblivion of the grave. + +And then, as a change came over the spirit of their dream, they saw the +Future, with their own children travelling along the same weary road to +the same kind of goal. + +It is possible that visions of this character were conjured up in their +minds by the singing, for the words of the song gave expression to +their ideal of what human life should be. That was all they wanted--to +be allowed to work like brutes for the benefit of other people. They +did not want to be civilized themselves and they intended to take good +care that the children they had brought into the world should never +enjoy the benefits of civilization either. As they often said: + +'Who and what are our children that they shouldn't be made to work for +their betters? They're not Gentry's children, are they? The good +things of life was never meant for the likes of them. Let 'em work! +That's wot the likes of them was made for, and if we can only get +Tariff Reform for 'em they will always be sure of plenty of it--not +only Full Time, but Overtime! As for edication, travellin' in furrin' +parts, an' enjoying life an' all sich things as that, they was never +meant for the likes of our children--they're meant for Gentry's +children! Our children is only like so much dirt compared with +Gentry's children! That's wot the likes of us is made for--to Work for +Gentry, so as they can 'ave plenty of time to enjoy theirselves; and +the Gentry is made to 'ave a good time so as the likes of us can 'ave +Plenty of Work.' + +There were several more verses, and by the time they had sung them all, +the Tories were in a state of wild enthusiasm. Even Ned Dawson, who +had fallen asleep with his head pillowed on his arms on the table, +roused himself up at the end of each verse, and after having joined in +the chorus, went to sleep again. + +At the end of the song they gave three cheers for Tariff Reform and +Plenty of Work, and then Crass, who, as the singer of the last song, +had the right to call upon the next man, nominated Philpot, who +received an ovation when he stood up, for he was a general favourite. +He never did no harm to nobody, and he was always wiling to do anyone a +good turn whenever he had the opportunity. Shouts of 'Good old Joe' +resounded through the room as he crossed over to the piano, and in +response to numerous requests for 'The old song' he began to sing 'The +Flower Show': + + 'Whilst walkin' out the other night, not knowing where to go + I saw a bill upon a wall about a Flower Show. + + So I thought the flowers I'd go and see to pass away the night. + And when I got into that Show it was a curious sight. + So with your kind intention and a little of your aid, + Tonight some flowers I'll mention which I hope will never fade.' + + Omnes: + To-night some flowers I'll mention which I hope will never fade.' + +There were several more verses, from which it appeared that the +principal flowers in the Show were the Rose, the Thistle and the +Shamrock. + +When he had finished, the applause was so deafening and the demands for +an encore so persistent that to satisfy them he sang another old +favourite--'Won't you buy my pretty flowers?' + + 'Ever coming, ever going, + Men and women hurry by, + Heedless of the tear-drops gleaming, + In her sad and wistful eye + How her little heart is sighing + Thro' the cold and dreary hours, + Only listen to her crying, + "Won't you buy my pretty flowers?"' + +When the last verse of this sang had been sung five er six times, +Philpot exercised his right of nominating the next singer, and called +upon Dick Wantley, who with many suggestive gestures and grimaces sang +'Put me amongst the girls', and afterwards called upon Payne, the +foreman carpenter, who gave 'I'm the Marquis of Camberwell Green'. + +There was a lot of what music-hall artists call 'business' attached to +his song, and as he proceeded, Payne, who was ghastly pale and very +nervous, went through a lot of galvanic motions and gestures, bowing +and scraping and sliding about and flourishing his handkerchief in +imitation of the courtly graces of the Marquis. During this +performance the audience maintained an appalling silence, which so +embarrassed Payne that before he was half-way through the song he had +to stop because he could not remember the rest. However, to make up +for this failure he sang another called 'We all must die, like the fire +in the grate'. This also was received in a very lukewarm manner by the +crowd, same of whom laughed and others suggested that if he couldn't +sing any better than that, the sooner HE was dead the better. + +This was followed by another Tory ballad, the chorus being as follows: + + His clothes may be ragged, his hands may be soiled. + But where's the disgrace if for bread he has toiled. + His 'art is in the right place, deny it no one can + The backbone of Old England is the honest workin' man.' + +After a few more songs it was decided to adjourn to a field at the rear +of the tavern to have a game of cricket. Sides were formed, Rushton, +Didlum, Grinder, and the other gentlemen taking part just as if they +were only common people, and while the game was in progress the rest +played ring quoits or reclined on the grass watching the players, +whilst the remainder amused themselves drinking beer and playing cards +and shove-ha'penny in the bar parlour, or taking walks around the +village sampling the beer at the other pubs, of which there were three. + +The time passed in this manner until seven o'clock, the hour at which +it had been arranged to start on the return journey; but about a +quarter of an hour before they set out an unpleasant incident occurred. + +During the time that they were playing cricket a party of glee singers, +consisting of four young girls and five men, three of whom were young +fellows, the other two being rather elderly, possibly the fathers of +some of the younger members of the party, came into the field and sang +several part songs for their entertainment. Towards the close of the +game most of the men had assembled in this field, and during a pause in +the singing the musicians sent one of their number, a shy girl about +eighteen years of age--who seemed as if she would rather that someone +else had the task--amongst the crowd to make a collection. The girl +was very nervous and blushed as she murmured her request, and held out +a straw hat that evidently belonged to one of the male members of the +glee party. A few of the men gave pennies, some refused or pretended +not to see either the girl or the hat, others offered to give her some +money for a kiss, but what caused the trouble was that two or three of +those who had been drinking more than was good for them dropped the +still burning ends of their cigars, all wet with saliva as they were, +into the hat and Dick Wantley spit into it. + +The girl hastily returned to her companions, and as she went some of +the men who had witnessed the behaviour of those who had insulted her, +advised them to make themselves scarce, as they stood a good chance of +getting a thrashing from the girl's friends. They said it would serve +them dam' well right if they did get a hammering. + +Partly sobered by fear, the three culprits sneaked off and hid +themselves, pale and trembling with terror, under the box seats of the +three brakes. They had scarcely left when the men of the glee party +came running up, furiously demanding to see those who had insulted the +girl. As they could get no satisfactory answer, one of their number +ran back and presently returned, bringing the girl with him, the other +young women following a little way behind. + +She said she could not see the men they were looking for, so they went +down to the public house to see if they could find them there, some of +the Rushton's men accompanying them and protesting their indignation. + + + +The time passed quickly enough and by half past seven the brakes were +loaded up again and a start made for the return journey. + +They called at all the taverns on the road, and by the time they +reached the Blue Lion half of them were three sheets in the wind, and +five or six were very drunk, including the driver of Crass's brake and +the man with the bugle. The latter was so far gone that they had to +let him lie down in the bottom of the carriage amongst their feet, +where he fell asleep, while the others amused themselves by blowing +weird shrieks out of the horn. + +There was an automatic penny-in-the-slot piano at the Blue Lion and as +that was the last house of the road they made a rather long stop there, +playing hooks and rings, shove-ha'penny, drinking, singing, dancing and +finally quarrelling. + +Several of them seemed disposed to quarrel with Newman. All sorts of +offensive remarks were made at him in his hearing. Once someone +ostentatiously knocked his glass of lemonade over, and a little later +someone else collided violently with him just as he was in the act of +drinking, causing his lemonade to spill all over his clothes. The +worst of it was that most of these rowdy ones were his fellow +passengers in Crass's brake, and there was not much chance of getting a +seat in either of the other carriages, for they were overcrowded +already. + +From the remarks he overheard from time to time, Newman guessed the +reason of their hostility, and as their manner towards him grew more +menacing, he became so nervous that he began to think of quietly +sneaking off and walking the remainder of the way home by himself, +unless he could get somebody in one of the other brakes to change seats +with him. + +Whilst these thoughts were agitating his mind, Dick Wantley suddenly +shouted out that he was going to go for the dirty tyke who had offered +to work under price last winter. + +It was his fault that they were all working for sixpence halfpenny and +he was going to wipe the floor with him. Some of his friends eagerly +offered to assist, but others interposed, and for a time it looked as +if there was going to be a free fight, the aggressors struggling hard +to get at their inoffensive victim. + +Eventually, however, Newman found a seat in Misery's brake, squatting +on the floor with his back to the horses, thankful enough to be out of +reach of the drunken savages, who were now roaring out ribald songs and +startling the countryside, as they drove along, with unearthly blasts +on the coach horn. + +Meantime, although none of them seemed to notice it, the brake was +travelling at a furious rate, and swaying about from side to side in a +very erratic manner. It would have been the last carriage, but things +had got a bit mixed at the Blue Lion and, instead of bringing up the +rear of the procession, it was now second, just behind the small +vehicle containing Rushton and his friends. + +Crass several times reminded them that the other carriage was so near +that Rushton must be able to hear every word that was said, and these +repeated admonitions at length enraged the Semi-drunk, who shouted out +that they didn't care a b--r if he could hear. Who the bloody hell was +he? To hell with him! + +'Damn Rushton, and you too!' cried Bill Bates, addressing Crass. +'You're only a dirty toe-rag! That's all you are--a bloody rotter! +That's the only reason you gets put in charge of jobs--'cos you're a +good -driver! You're a bloody sight worse than Rushton or Misery +either! Who was it started the one-man, one-room dodge, eh? Why, you, +yer bleeder!' + +'Knock 'im orf 'is bleedin' perch,' suggested Bundy. + +Everybody seemed to think this was a very good idea, but when the +Semi-drunk attempted to rise for the purpose of carrying it out, he was +thrown down by a sudden lurch of the carriage on the top of the +prostrate figure of the bugle man and by the time the others had +assisted him back to his seat they had forgotten all about their plan +of getting rid of Crass. + +Meantime the speed of the vehicle had increased to a fearful rate. + +Rushton and the other occupants of the little wagonette in front had +been for some time shouting to them to moderate the pace of their +horses, but as the driver of Crass's brake was too drunk to understand +what they said he took no notice, and they had no alternative but to +increase their own speed to avoid being run down. The drunken driver +now began to imagine that they were trying to race him, and became +fired with the determination to pass them. It was a very narrow road, +but there was just about room to do it, and he had sufficient +confidence in his own skill with the ribbons to believe that he could +get past in safety. + +The terrified gesticulations and the shouts of Rushton's party only +served to infuriate him, because he imagined that they were jeering at +him for not being able to overtake them. He stood up on the footboard +and lashed the horses till they almost flew over the ground, while the +carriage swayed and skidded in a fearful manner. + +In front, the horses of Rushton's conveyance were also galloping at top +speed, the vehicle bounding and reeling from one side of the road to +the other, whilst its terrified occupants, whose faces were blanched +with apprehension, sat clinging to their seats and to each other, their +eyes projecting from the sockets as they gazed back with terror at +their pursuers, some of whom were encouraging the drunken driver with +promises of quarts of beer, and urging on the horses with curses and +yells. + +Crass's fat face was pallid with fear as he clung trembling to his +seat. Another man, very drunk and oblivious of everything, was leaning +over the side of the brake, spewing into the road, while the remainder, +taking no interest in the race, amused themselves by singing--conducted +by the Semi-drunk--as loud as they could roar: + + 'Has anyone seen a Germin band, + Germin Band, Germin Band? + I've been lookin' about, + Pom--Pom, Pom, Pom, Pom! + + 'I've searched every pub, both near and far, + Near and far, near and far, + I want my Fritz, + What plays tiddley bits + On the big trombone!' + +The other two brakes had fallen far behind. The one presided over by +Hunter contained a mournful crew. Nimrod himself, from the effects of +numerous drinks of ginger beer with secret dashes of gin in it, had +become at length crying drunk, and sat weeping in gloomy silence beside +the driver, a picture of lachrymose misery and but dimly conscious of +his surroundings, and Slyme, who rode with Hunter because he was a +fellow member of the Shining Light Chapel. Then there was another +paperhanger--an unhappy wretch who was afflicted with religious mania; +he had brought a lot of tracts with him which he had distributed to the +other men, to the villagers of Tubberton and to anybody else who would +take them. + +Most of the other men who rode in Nimrod's brake were of the +'religious' working man type. Ignorant, shallow-pated dolts, without +as much intellectuality as an average cat. Attendants at various PSAs +and 'Church Mission Halls' who went every Sunday afternoon to be +lectured on their duty to their betters and to have their minds--save +the mark!--addled and stultified by such persons as Rushton, Sweater, +Didlum and Grinder, not to mention such mental specialists as the holy +reverend Belchers and Boshers, and such persons as John Starr. + +At these meetings none of the 'respectable' working men were allowed to +ask any questions, or to object to, or find fault with anything that +was said, or to argue, or discuss, or criticize. They had to sit there +like a lot of children while they were lectured and preached at and +patronized. Even as sheep before their shearers are dumb, so they were +not permitted to open their mouths. For that matter they did not wish +to be allowed to ask any questions, or to discuss anything. They would +not have been able to. They sat there and listened to what was said, +but they had but a very hazy conception of what it was all about. + +Most of them belonged to these PSAs merely for the sake of the loaves +and fishes. Every now and then they were awarded prizes--Self-help by +Smiles, and other books suitable for perusal by persons suffering from +almost complete obliteration of the mental faculties. Besides other +benefits there was usually a Christmas Club attached to the 'PSA' or +'Mission' and the things were sold to the members slightly below cost +as a reward for their servility. + +They were for the most part tame, broken-spirited, poor wretches who +contentedly resigned themselves to a life of miserable toil and +poverty, and with callous indifference abandoned their offspring to the +same fate. Compared with such as these, the savages of New Guinea or +the Red Indians are immensely higher in the scale of manhood. They are +free! They call no man master; and if they do not enjoy the benefits +of science and civilization, neither do they toil to create those +things for the benefit of others. And as for their children--most of +those savages would rather knock them on the head with a tomahawk than +allow them to grow up to be half-starved drudges for other men. + +But these were not free: their servile lives were spent in grovelling +and cringing and toiling and running about like little dogs at the +behest of their numerous masters. And as for the benefits of science +and civilization, their only share was to work and help to make them, +and then to watch other men enjoy them. And all the time they were +tame and quiet and content and said, 'The likes of us can't expect to +'ave nothing better, and as for our children wot's been good enough for +us is good enough for the likes of them.' + +But although they were so religious and respectable and so contented to +be robbed on a large scale, yet in small matters, in the commonplace +and petty affairs of their everyday existence, most of these men were +acutely alive to what their enfeebled minds conceived to be their own +selfish interests, and they possessed a large share of that singular +cunning which characterizes this form of dementia. + +That was why they had chosen to ride in Nimrod's brake--because they +wished to chum up with him as much as possible, in order to increase +their chances of being kept on in preference to others who were not so +respectable. + +Some of these poor creatures had very large heads, but a close +examination would have shown that the size was due to the extraordinary +thickness of the bones. The cavity of the skull was not so large as +the outward appearance of the head would have led a casual observer to +suppose, and even in those instances where the brain was of a fair +size, it was of inferior quality, being coarse in texture and to a +great extent composed of fat. + +Although most of them were regular attendants at some place of +so-called worship, they were not all teetotallers, and some of them +were now in different stages of intoxication, not because they had had +a great deal to drink, but because--being usually abstemious--it did +not take very much to make them drunk. + +From time to time this miserable crew tried to enliven the journey by +singing, but as most of them only knew odd choruses it did not come to +much. As for the few who did happen to know all the words of a song, +they either had no voices or were not inclined to sing. The most +successful contribution was that of the religious maniac, who sang +several hymns, the choruses being joined in by everybody, both drunk +and sober. + +The strains of these hymns, wafted back through the balmy air to the +last coach, were the cause of much hilarity to its occupants who also +sang the choruses. As they had all been brought up under 'Christian' +influences and educated in 'Christian' schools, they all knew the +words: 'Work, for the night is coming', 'Turn poor Sinner and escape +Eternal Fire', 'Pull for the Shore' and 'Where is my Wandering Boy?' + +The last reminded Harlow of a song he knew nearly all the words of, +'Take the news to Mother', the singing of which was much appreciated by +all present and when it was finished they sang it all over again, +Philpot being so affected that he actually shed tears; and Easton +confided to Owen that there was no getting away from the fact that a +boy's best friend is his mother. + +In this last carriage, as in the other two, there were several men who +were more or less intoxicated and for the same reason--because not +being used to taking much liquor, the few extra glasses they had drunk +had got into their heads. They were as sober a lot of fellows as need +be at ordinary times, and they had flocked together in this brake +because they were all of about the same character--not tame, contented +imbeciles like most of those in Misery's carnage, but men something +like Harlow, who, although dissatisfied with their condition, doggedly +continued the hopeless, weary struggle against their fate. + +They were not teetotallers and they never went to either church or +chapel, but they spent little in drink or on any form of enjoyment--an +occasional glass of beer or a still rarer visit to a music-hall and now +and then an outing more or less similar to this being the sum total of +their pleasures. + +These four brakes might fitly be regarded as so many travelling lunatic +asylums, the inmates of each exhibiting different degrees and forms of +mental disorder. + +The occupants of the first--Rushton, Didlum and Co.--might be classed +as criminal lunatics who injured others as well as themselves. In a +properly constituted system of society such men as these would be +regarded as a danger to the community, and would be placed under such +restraint as would effectually prevent them from harming themselves or +others. These wretches had abandoned every thought and thing that +tends to the elevation of humanity. They had given up everything that +makes life good and beautiful, in order to carry on a mad struggle to +acquire money which they would never be sufficiently cultured to +properly enjoy. Deaf and blind to every other consideration, to this +end they had degraded their intellects by concentrating them upon the +minutest details of expense and profit, and for their reward they raked +in their harvest of muck and lucre along with the hatred and curses of +those they injured in the process. They knew that the money they +accumulated was foul with the sweat of their brother men, and wet with +the tears of little children, but they were deaf and blind and callous +to the consequences of their greed. Devoid of every ennobling thought +or aspiration, they grovelled on the filthy ground, tearing up the +flowers to get at the worms. + +In the coach presided over by Crass, Bill Bates, the Semi-drunk and the +other two or three habitual boozers were all men who had been driven +mad by their environment. At one time most of them had been fellows +like Harlow, working early and late whenever they got the chance, only +to see their earnings swallowed up in a few minutes every Saturday by +the landlord and all the other host of harpies and profitmongers, who +were waiting to demand it as soon as it was earned. In the years that +were gone, most of these men used to take all their money home +religiously every Saturday and give it to the 'old girl' for the house, +and then, lo and behold, in a moment, yea, even in the twinkling of an +eye, it was all gone! Melted away like snow in the sun! and nothing to +show for it except an insufficiency of the bare necessaries of life! +But after a time they had become heartbroken and sick and tired of that +sort of thing. They hankered after a little pleasure, a little +excitement, a little fun, and they found that it was possible to buy +something like those in quart pots at the pub. They knew they were not +the genuine articles, but they were better than nothing at all, and so +they gave up the practice of giving all their money to the old girl to +give to the landlord and the other harpies, and bought beer with some +of it instead; and after a time their minds became so disordered from +drinking so much of this beer, that they cared nothing whether the rent +was paid or not. They cared but little whether the old girl and the +children had food or clothes. They said, 'To hell with everything and +everyone,' and they cared for nothing so long as they could get plenty +of beer. + +The occupants of Nimrod's coach have already been described and most of +them may correctly be classed as being similar to idiots of the +third degree--very cunning and selfish, and able to read and write, but +with very little understanding of what they read except on the most +common topics. + +As for those who rode with Harlow in the last coach, most of them, as +has been already intimated, were men of similar character to himself. +The greater number of them fairly good workmen and--unlike the boozers +in Crass's coach--not yet quite heartbroken, but still continuing the +hopeless struggle against poverty. These differed from Nimrod's lot +inasmuch as they were not content. They were always complaining of +their wretched circumstances, and found a certain kind of pleasure in +listening to the tirades of the Socialists against the existing social +conditions, and professing their concurrence with many of the +sentiments expressed, and a desire to bring about a better state of +affairs. + +Most of them appeared to be quite sane, being able to converse +intelligently on any ordinary subject without discovering any symptoms +of mental disorder, and it was not until the topic of Parliamentary +elections was mentioned that evidence of their insanity was +forthcoming. It then almost invariably appeared that they were subject +to the most extraordinary hallucinations and extravagant delusions, the +commonest being that the best thing that the working people could do to +bring about an improvement in their condition, was to continue to elect +their Liberal and Tory employers to make laws for and to rule over +them! At such times, if anyone ventured to point out to them that that +was what they had been doing all their lives, and referred them to the +manifold evidences that met them wherever they turned their eyes of its +folly and futility, they were generally immediately seized with a +paroxysm of the most furious mania, and were with difficulty prevented +from savagely assaulting those who differed from them. + +They were usually found in a similar condition of maniacal excitement +for some time preceding and during a Parliamentary election, but +afterwards they usually manifested that modification of insanity which +is called melancholia. In fact they alternated between these two forms +of the disease. During elections, the highest state of exalted mania; +and at ordinary times--presumably as a result of reading about the +proceedings in Parliament of the persons whom they had elected--in a +state of melancholic depression, in their case an instance of hope +deferred making the heart sick. + +This condition occasionally proved to be the stage of transition into +yet another modification of the disease--that known as dipsomania, the +phase exhibited by Bill Bates and the Semi-drunk. + +Yet another form of insanity was that shown by the Socialists. Like +most of their fellow passengers in the last coach, the majority of +these individuals appeared to be of perfectly sound mind. Upon +entering into conversation with them one found that they reasoned +correctly and even brilliantly. They had divided their favourite +subject into three parts. First; an exact definition of the condition +known as Poverty. Secondly; a knowledge of the causes of Poverty; and +thirdly, a rational plan for the cure of Poverty. Those who were +opposed to them always failed to refute their arguments, and feared, +and nearly always refused, to meet them in fair fight--in open +debate--preferring to use the cowardly and despicable weapons of +slander and misrepresentation. The fact that these Socialists never +encountered their opponents except to defeat them, was a powerful +testimony to the accuracy of their reasonings and the correctness of +their conclusions--and yet they were undoubtedly mad. One might +converse with them for an indefinite time on the three divisions of +their subject without eliciting any proofs of insanity, but directly +one inquired what means they proposed to employ in order to bring about +the adoption of their plan, they replied that they hoped to do so by +reasoning with the others! + +Although they had sense enough to understand the real causes of +poverty, and the only cure for poverty, they were nevertheless so +foolish that they entertained the delusion that it is possible to +reason with demented persons, whereas every sane person knows that to +reason with a maniac is not only fruitless, but rather tends to fix +more deeply the erroneous impressions of his disordered mind. + +The wagonette containing Rushton and his friends continued to fly over +the road, pursued by the one in which rode Crass, Bill Bates, and the +Semi-drunk; but notwithstanding all the efforts of the drunken driver, +they were unable to overtake or pass the smaller vehicle, and when they +reached the foot of the hill that led up to Windley the distance +between the two carriages rapidly increased, and the race was +reluctantly abandoned. + +When they reached the top of the hill Rushton and his friends did not +wait for the others, but drove off towards Mugsborough as fast as they +could. + +Crass's brake was the next to arrive at the summit, and they halted +there to wait for the other two conveyances and when they came up all +those who lived nearby got out, and some of them sang 'God Save the +King', and then with shouts of 'Good Night', and cries of 'Don't forget +six o'clock Monday morning', they dispersed to their homes and the +carriages moved off once more. + +At intervals as they passed through Windley brief stoppages were made +in order to enable others to get out, and by the time they reached the +top of the long incline that led down into Mugsborough it was nearly +twelve o'clock and the brakes were almost empty, the only passengers +being Owen and four or five others who lived down town. By ones and +twos these also departed, disappearing into the obscurity of the night, +until there was none left, and the Beano was an event of the past. + + + +Chapter 45 + +The Great Oration + + +The outlook for the approaching winter was--as usual--gloomy in the +extreme. One of the leading daily newspapers published an article +prophesying a period of severe industrial depression. 'As the +warehouses were glutted with the things produced by the working +classes, there was no need for them to do any more work--at present; +and so they would now have to go and starve until such time as their +masters had sold or consumed the things already produced.' Of course, +the writer of the article did not put it exactly like that, but that +was what it amounted to. This article was quoted by nearly all the +other papers, both Liberal and Conservative. The Tory papers--ignoring +the fact that all the Protectionist countries were in exactly the same +condition, published yards of misleading articles about Tariff Reform. +The Liberal papers said Tariff Reform was no remedy. Look at America +and Germany--worse than here! Still, the situation was undoubtedly +very serious--continued the Liberal papers--and Something would have to +be done. They did not say exactly what, because, of course, they did +not know; but Something would have to be done--tomorrow. They talked +vaguely about Re-afforestation, and Reclaiming of Foreshores, and Sea +walls: but of course there was the question of Cost! that was a +difficulty. But all the same Something would have to be done. Some +Experiments must be tried! Great caution was necessary in dealing with +such difficult problems! We must go slow, and if in the meantime a few +thousand children die of starvation, or become 'rickety' or consumptive +through lack of proper nutrition it is, of course, very regrettable, +but after all they are only working-class children, so it doesn't +matter a great deal. + +Most of the writers of these Liberal and Tory papers seemed to think +that all that was necessary was to find 'Work' for the 'working' class! +That was their conception of a civilized nation in the twentieth +century! For the majority of the people to work like brutes in order +to obtain a 'living wage' for themselves and to create luxuries for a +small minority of persons who are too lazy to work at all! And +although this was all they thought was necessary, they did not know +what to do in order to bring even that much to pass! Winter was +returning, bringing in its train the usual crop of horrors, and the +Liberal and Tory monopolists of wisdom did not know what to do! + +Rushton's had so little work in that nearly all the hands expected that +they would be slaughtered the next Saturday after the 'Beano' and there +was one man--Jim Smith he was called--who was not allowed to live even +till then: he got the sack before breakfast on the Monday morning after +the Beano. + +This man was about forty-five years old, but very short for his age, +being only a little over five feet in height. The other men used to +say that Little Jim was not made right, for while his body was big +enough for a six-footer, his legs were very short, and the fact that he +was rather inclined to be fat added to the oddity of his appearance. + +On the Monday morning after the Beano he was painting an upper room in +a house where several other men were working, and it was customary for +the coddy to shout 'Yo! Ho!' at mealtimes, to let the hands know when +it was time to leave off work. At about ten minutes to eight, Jim had +squared the part of the work he had been doing--the window--so he +decided not to start on the door or the skirting until after breakfast. +Whilst he was waiting for the foreman to shout 'Yo! Ho!' his mind +reverted to the Beano, and he began to hum the tunes of some of the +songs that had been sung. He hummed the tune of 'He's a jolly good +fellow', and he could not get the tune out of his mind: it kept buzzing +in his head. He wondered what time it was? It could not be very far +off eight now, to judge by the amount of work he had done since six +o'clock. He had rubbed down and stopped all the woodwork and painted +the window. A jolly good two hours' work! He was only getting +sixpence-halfpenny an hour and if he hadn't earned a bob he hadn't +earned nothing! Anyhow, whether he had done enough for 'em or not he +wasn't goin' to do no more before breakfast. + +The tune of 'He's a jolly good fellow' was still buzzing in his head; +he thrust his hands deep down in his trouser pockets, and began to +polka round the room, humming softly: + + 'I won't do no more before breakfast! + I won't do no more before breakfast! + I won't do no more before breakfast! + So 'ip 'ip 'ip 'ooray! + So 'ip 'ip 'ip 'ooray So 'ip 'ip 'ooray! + I won't do no more before breakfast--etc.' + +'No! and you won't do but very little after breakfast, here!' shouted +Hunter, suddenly entering the room. + +'I've bin watchin' of you through the crack of the door for the last +'arf hour; and you've not done a dam' stroke all the time. You make +out yer time sheet, and go to the office at nine o'clock and git yer +money; we can't afford to pay you for playing the fool.' + +Leaving the man dumbfounded and without waiting for a reply, Misery +went downstairs and after kicking up a devil of a row with the foreman +for the lack of discipline on the job, he instructed him that Smith was +not to be permitted to resume work after breakfast. Then he rode away. +He had come in so stealthily that no one had known anything of his +arrival until they heard him bellowing at Smith. + +The latter did not stay to take breakfast but went off at once, and +when he was gone the other chaps said it served him bloody well right: +he was always singing, he ought to have more sense. You can't do as +you like nowadays you know! + +Easton--who was working at another job with Crass as his foreman--knew +that unless some more work came in he was likely to be one of those who +would have to go. As far as he could see it was only a week or two at +the most before everything would be finished up. But notwithstanding +the prospect of being out of work so soon he was far happier than he +had been for several months past, for he imagined he had discovered the +cause of Ruth's strange manner. + +This knowledge came to him on the night of the Beano. When he arrived +home he found that Ruth had already gone to bed: she had not been well, +and it was Mrs Linden's explanation of her illness that led Easton to +think that he had discovered the cause of the unhappiness of the last +few months. Now that he knew--as he thought--he blamed himself for not +having been more considerate and patient with her. At the same time he +was at a loss to understand why she had not told him about it herself. +The only explanation he could think of was the one suggested by Mrs +Linden--that at such times women often behaved strangely. However that +might be, he was glad to think he knew the reason of it all, and he +resolved that he would be more gentle and forebearing with her. + +The place where he was working was practically finished. It was a +large house called 'The Refuge', very similar to 'The Cave', and during +the last week or two, it had become what they called a 'hospital'. +That is, as the other jobs became finished the men were nearly all sent +to this one, so that there was quite a large crowd of them there. The +inside work was all finished--with the exception of the kitchen, which +was used as a mess room, and the scullery, which was the paint shop. + +Everybody was working on the job. Poor old Joe Philpot, whose +rheumatism had been very bad lately, was doing a very rough +job--painting the gable from a long ladder. + +But though there were plenty of younger men more suitable for this, +Philpot did not care to complain for fear Crass or Misery should think +he was not up to his work. At dinner time all the old hands assembled +in the kitchen, including Crass, Easton, Harlow, Bundy and Dick +Wantley, who still sat on a pail behind his usual moat. + +Philpot and Harlow were absent and everybody wondered what had become +of them. + +Several times during the morning they had been seen whispering together +and comparing scraps of paper, and various theories were put forward to +account for their disappearance. Most of the men thought they must +have heard something good about the probable winner of the Handicap and +had gone to put something on. Some others thought that perhaps they +had heard of another 'job' about to be started by some other firm and +had gone to inquire about it. + +'Looks to me as if they'll stand a very good chance of gettin' drowned +if they're gone very far,' remarked Easton, referring to the weather. +It had been threatening to rain all the morning, and during the last +few minutes it had become so dark that Crass lit the gas, so that--as +he expressed it--they should be able to see the way to their mouths. +Outside, the wind grew more boisterous every moment; the darkness +continued to increase, and presently there succeeded a torrential +downfall of rain, which beat fiercely against the windows, and poured +in torrents down the glass. The men glanced gloomily at each other. No +more work could be done outside that day, and there was nothing left to +do inside. As they were paid by the hour, this would mean that they +would have to lose half a day's pay. + +'If it keeps on like this we won't be able to do no more work, and we +won't be able to go home either,' remarked Easton. + +'Well, we're all right 'ere, ain't we?' said the man behind the moat; +'there's a nice fire and plenty of heasy chairs. Wot the 'ell more do +you want?' + +'Yes,' remarked another philosopher. 'If we only had a shove-ha'penny +table or a ring board, I reckon we should be able to enjoy ourselves +all right.' + +Philpot and Harlow were still absent, and the others again fell to +wondering where they could be. + +'I see old Joe up on 'is ladder only a few minutes before twelve,' +remarked Wantley. + +Everyone agreed that it was a mystery. + +At this moment the two truants returned, looking very important. + +Philpot was armed with a hammer and carried a pair of steps, while +Harlow bore a large piece of wallpaper which the two of them proceeded +to tack on the wall, much to the amusement of the others, who read the +announcement opposite written in charcoal. + +Every day at meals since Barrington's unexpected outburst at the Beano +dinner, the men had been trying their best to 'kid him on' to make +another speech, but so far without success. If anything, he had been +even more silent and reserved than before, as if he felt some regret +that he had spoken as he had on that occasion. Crass and his disciples +attributed Barrington's manner to fear that he was going to get the +sack for his trouble and they agreed amongst themselves that it would +serve him bloody well right if 'e did get the push. + +When they had fixed the poster on the wall, Philpot stood the steps in +the corner of the room, with the back part facing outwards, and then, +everything being ready for the lecturer, the two sat down in their +accustomed places and began to eat their dinners, Harlow remarking that +they would have to buck up or they would be too late for the meeting; +and the rest of the crowd began to discuss the poster. + +'Wot the 'ell does PLO mean?' demanded Bundy, with a puzzled expression. + +'Plain Layer On,' answered Philpot modestly. + +''Ave you ever 'eard the Professor preach before?' inquired the man on +the pail, addressing Bundy. + + Imperial Bankquet Hall + 'The Refuge' + on Thursday at 12.30 prompt + + Professor Barrington + WILL DELIVER A + + ORATION + + ENTITLED + + THE GREAT SECRET, OR + HOW TO LIVE WITHOUT WORK + + The Rev. Joe Philpot PLO + (Late absconding secretary of the light refreshment fund) + Will take the chair and anything else + he can lay his hands on. + + At The End Of The Lecture + A MEETING WILL BE + ARRANGED + And carried out according to the + Marquis of Queensbury's Rules. + + A Collection will be took up + in aid of the cost of printing + +'Only once, at the Beano,' replied that individual; 'an' that was once +too often!' + +'Finest speaker I ever 'eard,' said the man on the pail with +enthusiasm. 'I wouldn't miss this lecture for anything: this is one of +'is best subjects. I got 'ere about two hours before the doors was +opened, so as to be sure to get a seat.' + +'Yes, it's a very good subject,' said Crass, with a sneer. 'I believe +most of the Labour Members in Parliament is well up in it.' + +'And wot about the other members?' demanded Philpot. 'Seems to me as +if most of them knows something about it too.' + +'The difference is,' said Owen, 'the working classes voluntarily pay to +keep the Labour Members, but whether they like it or not, they have to +keep the others.' + +'The Labour members is sent to the 'Ouse of Commons,' said Harlow, 'and +paid their wages to do certain work for the benefit of the working +classes, just the same as we're sent 'ere and paid our wages by the +Bloke to paint this 'ouse.' + +'Yes,' said Crass; 'but if we didn't do the work we're paid to do, we +should bloody soon get the sack.' + +'I can't see how we've got to keep the other members,' said Slyme; +'they're mostly rich men, and they live on their own money.' + +'Of course,' said Crass. 'And I should like to know where we should be +without 'em! Talk about us keepin' them! It seems to me more like it +that they keeps us! The likes of us lives on rich people. Where +should we be if it wasn't for all the money they spend and the work +they 'as done? If the owner of this 'ouse 'adn't 'ad the money to +spend to 'ave it done up, most of us would 'ave bin out of work this +last six weeks, and starvin', the same as lots of others 'as been.' + +'Oh yes, that's right enough,' agreed Bundy. 'Labour is no good +without Capital. Before any work can be done there's one thing +necessary, and that's money. It would be easy to find work for all the +unemployed if the local authorities could only raise the money.' + +'Yes; that's quite true,' said Owen. 'And that proves that money is +the cause of poverty, because poverty consists in being short of the +necessaries of life: the necessaries of life are all produced by labour +applied to the raw materials: the raw materials exist in abundance and +there are plenty of people able and willing to work; but under present +conditions no work can be done without money; and so we have the +spectacle of a great army of people compelled to stand idle and starve +by the side of the raw materials from which their labour could produce +abundance of all the things they need--they are rendered helpless by +the power of Money! Those who possess all the money say that the +necessaries of life shall not be produced except for their profit.' + +'Yes! and you can't alter it,' said Crass, triumphantly. 'It's always +been like it, and it always will be like it.' + +''Ear! 'Ear!' shouted the man behind the moat. 'There's always been +rich and poor in the world, and there always will be.' + +Several others expressed their enthusiastic agreement with Crass's +opinion, and most of them appeared to be highly delighted to think that +the existing state of affairs could never be altered. + +'It hasn't always been like it, and it won't always be like it,' said +Owen. 'The time will come, and it's not very far distant, when the +necessaries of life will be produced for use and not for profit. The +time is coming when it will no longer be possible for a few selfish +people to condemn thousands of men and women and little children to +live in misery and die of want.' + +'Ah well, it won't be in your time, or mine either,' said Crass +gleefully, and most of the others laughed with imbecile satisfaction. + +'I've 'eard a 'ell of a lot about this 'ere Socialism,' remarked the +man behind the moat, 'but up to now I've never met nobody wot could +tell you plainly exactly wot it is.' + +'Yes; that's what I should like to know too,' said Easton. + +'Socialism means, "What's yours is mine, and what's mine's me own,"' +observed Bundy, and during the laughter that greeted this definition +Slyme was heard to say that Socialism meant Materialism, Atheism and +Free Love, and if it were ever to come about it would degrade men and +women to the level of brute beasts. Harlow said Socialism was a +beautiful ideal, which he for one would be very glad to see realized, +and he was afraid it was altogether too good to be practical, because +human nature is too mean and selfish. Sawkins said that Socialism was +a lot of bloody rot, and Crass expressed the opinion--which he had +culled from the delectable columns of the Obscurer--that it meant +robbing the industrious for the benefit of the idle and thriftless. + + + +Philpot had by this time finished his bread and cheese, and, having +taken a final draught of tea, he rose to his feet, and crossing over to +the corner of the room, ascended the pulpit, being immediately greeted +with a tremendous outburst of hooting, howling and booing, which he +smilingly acknowledged by removing his cap from his bald head and +bowing repeatedly. When the storm of shrieks, yells, groans and +catcalls had in some degree subsided, and Philpot was able to make +himself heard, he addressed the meeting as follows: + +'Gentlemen: First of all I beg to thank you very sincerely for the +magnificent and cordial reception you have given me on this occasion, +and I shall try to deserve your good opinion by opening the meeting as +briefly as possible. + +'Putting all jokes aside, I think we're all agreed about one thing, and +that is, that there's plenty of room for improvement in things in +general. (Hear, hear.) As our other lecturer, Professor Owen, pointed +out in one of 'is lectures and as most of you 'ave read in the +newspapers, although British trade was never so good before as it is +now, there was never so much misery and poverty, and so many people out +of work, and so many small shopkeepers goin' up the spout as there is +at this partickiler time. Now, some people tells us as the way to put +everything right is to 'ave Free Trade and plenty of cheap food. Well, +we've got them all now, but the misery seems to go on all around us all +the same. Then there's other people tells us as the 'Friscal Policy' +is the thing to put everything right. ("Hear, hear" from Crass and +several others.) And then there's another lot that ses that Socialism +is the only remedy. Well, we all know pretty well wot Free Trade and +Protection means, but most of us don't know exactly what Socialism +means; and I say as it's the dooty of every man to try and find out +which is the right thing to vote for, and when 'e's found it out, to do +wot 'e can to 'elp to bring it about. And that's the reason we've gorn +to the enormous expense of engaging Professor Barrington to come 'ere +this afternoon and tell us exactly what Socialism is. + +''As I 'ope you're all just as anxious to 'ear it as I am myself, I +will not stand between you and the lecturer no longer, but will now +call upon 'im to address you.' + +Philpot was loudly applauded as he descended from the pulpit, and in +response to the clamorous demands of the crowd, Barrington, who in the +meantime had yielded to Owen's entreaties that he would avail himself +of this opportunity of proclaiming the glad tidings of the good time +that is to be, got up on the steps in his turn. + +Harlow, desiring that everything should be done decently and in order, +had meantime arranged in front of the pulpit a carpenter's sawing +stool, and an empty pail with a small piece of board laid across it, to +serve as a seat and a table for the chairman. Over the table he draped +a large red handkerchief. At the right he placed a plumber's large +hammer; at the left, a battered and much-chipped jam-jar, full of tea. +Philpot having taken his seat on the pail at this table and announced +his intention of bashing out with the hammer the brains of any +individual who ventured to disturb the meeting, Barrington commenced: + +'Mr Chairman and Gentlemen. For the sake of clearness, and in order to +avoid confusing one subject with another, I have decided to divide the +oration into two parts. First, I will try to explain as well as I am +able what Socialism is. I will try to describe to you the plan or +system upon which the Co-operative Commonwealth of the future will be +organized; and, secondly, I will try to tell you how it can be brought +about. But before proceeding with the first part of the subject, I +would like to refer very slightly to the widespread delusion that +Socialism is impossible because it means a complete change from an +order of things which has always existed. We constantly hear it said +that because there have always been rich and poor in the world, there +always must be. I want to point out to you first of all, that it is +not true that even in its essential features, the present system has +existed from all time; it is not true that there have always been rich +and poor in the world, in the sense that we understand riches and +poverty today. + +'These statements are lies that have been invented for the purpose of +creating in us a feeling of resignation to the evils of our condition. +They are lies which have been fostered by those who imagine that it is +to their interest that we should be content to see our children +condemned to the same poverty and degradation that we have endured +ourselves. + +I do not propose--because there is not time, although it is really part +of my subject--to go back to the beginnings of history, and describe in +detail the different systems of social organization which evolved from +and superseded each other at different periods, but it is necessary to +remind you that the changes that have taken place in the past have been +even greater than the change proposed by Socialists today. The change +from savagery and cannibalism when men used to devour the captives they +took in war--to the beginning of chattel slavery, when the tribes or +clans into which mankind were divided--whose social organization was a +kind of Communism, all the individuals belonging to the tribe being +practically social equals, members of one great family--found it more +profitable to keep their captives as slaves than to eat them. The +change from the primitive Communism of the tribes, into the more +individualistic organization of the nations, and the development of +private ownership of the land and slaves and means of subsistence. The +change from chattel slavery into Feudalism; and the change from +Feudalism into the earlier form of Capitalism; and the equally great +change from what might be called the individualistic capitalism which +displaced Feudalism, to the system of Co-operative Capitalism and Wage +Slavery of today.' + +'I believe you must 'ave swollered a bloody dictionary,' exclaimed the +man behind the moat. + +'Keep horder,' shouted Philpot, fiercely, striking the table with the +hammer, and there were loud shouts of 'Chair' and 'Chuck 'im out,' from +several quarters. + +When order was restored, the lecturer proceeded: + +'So it is not true that practically the same state of affairs as we +have today has always existed. It is not true that anything like the +poverty that prevails at present existed at any previous period of the +world's history. When the workers were the property of their masters, +it was to their owners' interest to see that they were properly clothed +and fed; they were not allowed to be idle, and they were not allowed to +starve. Under Feudalism also, although there were certain intolerable +circumstances, the position of the workers was, economically, +infinitely better than it is today. The worker was in subjection to +his Lord, but in return his lord had certain responsibilities and +duties to perform, and there was a large measure of community of +interest between them. + +'I do not intend to dwell upon this pout at length, but in support of +what I have said I will quote as nearly as I can from memory the words +of the historian Froude. + +'"I do not believe," says Mr Froude, "that the condition of the people +in Mediaeval Europe was as miserable as is pretended. I do not believe +that the distribution of the necessaries of life was as unequal as it +is at present. If the tenant lived hard, the lord had little luxury. +Earls and countesses breakfasted at five in the morning, on salt beef +and herring, a slice of bread and a draught of ale from a blackjack. +Lords and servants dined in the same hall and shared the same meal." + +'When we arrive at the system that displaced Feudalism, we find that +the condition of the workers was better in every way than it is at +present. The instruments of production--the primitive machinery and +the tools necessary for the creation of wealth--belonged to the skilled +workers who used them, and the things they produced were also the +property of those who made them. + +'In those days a master painter, a master shoemaker, a master saddler, +or any other master tradesmen, was really a skilled artisan working on +his own account. He usually had one or two apprentices, who were +socially his equals, eating at the same table and associating with the +other members of his family. It was quite a common occurrence for the +apprentice--after he had attained proficiency in his work--to marry his +master's daughter and succeed to his master's business. In those days +to be a "master" tradesman meant to be master of the trade, not merely +of some underpaid drudges in one's employment. The apprentices were +there to master the trade, qualifying themselves to become master +workers themselves; not mere sweaters and exploiters of the labour of +others, but useful members of society. In those days, because there +was no labour-saving machinery the community was dependent for its +existence on the productions of hand labour. Consequently the majority +of the people were employed in some kind of productive work, and the +workers were honoured and respected citizens, living in comfort on the +fruits of their labour. They were not rich as we understand wealth +now, but they did not starve and they were not regarded with contempt, +as are their successors of today. + +'The next great change came with the introduction of steam machinery. +That power came to the aid of mankind in their struggle for existence, +enabling them to create easily and in abundance those things of which +they had previously been able to produce only a bare sufficiency. A +wonderful power--equalling and surpassing the marvels that were +imagined by the writers of fairy tales and Eastern stories--a power so +vast--so marvellous, that it is difficult to find words to convey +anything like an adequate conception of it. + +'We all remember the story, in The Arabian Nights, of Aladdin, who in +his poverty became possessed of the Wonderful Lamp and--he was poor no +longer. He merely had to rub the Lamp--the Genie appeared, and at +Aladdin's command he produced an abundance of everything that the youth +could ask or dream of. With the discovery of steam machinery, mankind +became possessed of a similar power to that imagined by the Eastern +writer. At the command of its masters the Wonderful Lamp of Machinery +produces an enormous, overwhelming, stupendous abundance and +superfluity of every material thing necessary for human existence and +happiness. With less labour than was formerly required to cultivate +acres, we can now cultivate miles of land. In response to human +industry, aided by science and machinery, the fruitful earth teems with +such lavish abundance as was never known or deemed possible before. If +you go into the different factories and workshops you will see +prodigious quantities of commodities of every kind pouring out of the +wonderful machinery, literally like water from a tap. + +'One would naturally and reasonably suppose that the discovery or +invention of such an aid to human industry would result in increased +happiness and comfort for every one; but as you all know, the reverse +is the case; and the reason of that extraordinary result, is the reason +of all the poverty and unhappiness that we see around us and endure +today--it is simply because--the machinery became the property of a +comparatively few individuals and private companies, who use it not for +the benefit of the community but to create profits for themselves. + +'As this labour-saving machinery became more extensively used, the +prosperous class of skilled workers gradually disappeared. Some of the +wealthier of them became distributers instead of producers of wealth; +that is to say, they became shopkeepers, retailing the commodities that +were produced for the most part by machinery. But the majority of them +in course of time degenerated into a class of mere wage earners, having +no property in the machines they used, and no property in the things +they made. + +'They sold their labour for so much per hour, and when they could not +find any employer to buy it from them, they were reduced to destitution. + +'Whilst the unemployed workers were starving and those in employment +not much better off, the individuals and private companies who owned +the machinery accumulated fortunes; but their profits were diminished +and their working expenses increased by what led to the latest great +change in the organization of the production of the necessaries of +life--the formation of the Limited Companies and the Trusts; the +decision of the private companies to combine and co-operate with each +other in order to increase their profits and decrease their working +expenses. The results of these combines have been--an increase in the +quantities of the things produced: a decrease in the number of wage +earners employed--and enormously increased profits for the shareholders. + +'But it is not only the wage-earning class that is being hurt; for +while they are being annihilated by the machinery and the efficient +organization of industry by the trusts that control and are beginning +to monopolize production, the shopkeeping classes are also being slowly +but surely crushed out of existence by the huge companies that are able +by the greater magnitude of their operations to buy and sell more +cheaply than the small traders. + +'The consequence of all this is that the majority of the people are in +a condition of more or less abject poverty--living from hand to mouth. +It is an admitted fact that about thirteen millions of our people are +always on the verge of starvation. The significant results of this +poverty face us on every side. The alarming and persistent increase of +insanity. The large number of would-be recruits for the army who have +to be rejected because they are physically unfit; and the shameful +condition of the children of the poor. More than one-third of the +children of the working classes in London have some sort of mental or +physical defect; defects in development; defects of eyesight; abnormal +nervousness; rickets, and mental dullness. The difference in height +and weight and general condition of the children in poor schools and +the children of the so-called better classes, constitutes a crime that +calls aloud to Heaven for vengeance upon those who are responsible for +it. + +'It is childish to imagine that any measure of Tariff Reform or +Political Reform such as a paltry tax on foreign-made goods or +abolishing the House of Lords, or disestablishing the Church--or +miserable Old Age Pensions, or a contemptible tax on land, can deal +with such a state of affairs as this. They have no House of Lords in +America or France, and yet their condition is not materially different +from ours. You may be deceived into thinking that such measures as +those are great things. You may fight for them and vote for them, but +after you have got them you will find that they will make no +appreciable improvement in your condition. You will still have to +slave and drudge to gain a bare sufficiency of the necessaries of life. +You will still have to eat the same kind of food and wear the same kind +of clothes and boots as now. Your masters will still have you in their +power to insult and sweat and drive. Your general condition will be +just the same as at present because such measures as those are not +remedies but red herrings, intended by those who trail them to draw us +away from the only remedy, which is to be found only in the Public +Ownership of the Machinery, and the National Organization of Industry +for the production and distribution of the necessaries of life, not for +the profit of a few but for the benefit of all! + +'That is the next great change; not merely desirable, but imperatively +necessary and inevitable! That is Socialism! + +'It is not a wild dream of Superhuman Unselfishness. No one will be +asked to sacrifice himself for the benefit of others or to love his +neighbours better than himself as is the case under the present system, +which demands that the majority shall unselfishly be content to labour +and live in wretchedness for the benefit of a few. There is no such +principle of Philanthropy in Socialism, which simply means that even as +all industries are now owned by shareholders, and organized and +directed by committees and officers elected by the shareholders, so +shall they in future belong to the State, that is, the whole +people--and they shall be organized and directed by committees and +officers elected by the community. + +'Under existing circumstances the community is exposed to the danger of +being invaded and robbed and massacred by some foreign power. Therefore +the community has organized and owns and controls an Army and Navy to +protect it from that danger. Under existing circumstances the +community is menaced by another equally great danger--the people are +mentally and physically degenerating from lack of proper food and +clothing. Socialists say that the community should undertake and +organize the business of producing and distributing all these things; +that the State should be the only employer of labour and should own all +the factories, mills, mines, farms, railways, fishing fleets, sheep +farms, poultry farms and cattle ranches. + +'Under existing circumstances the community is degenerating mentally +and physically because the majority cannot afford to have decent houses +to live in. Socialists say that the community should take in hand the +business of providing proper houses for all its members, that the State +should be the only landlord, that all the land and all the houses +should belong to the whole people... + +'We must do this if we are to keep our old place in the van of human +progress. A nation of ignorant, unintelligent, half-starved, +broken-spirited degenerates cannot hope to lead humanity in its +never-ceasing march onward to the conquest of the future. + + 'Vain, mightiest fleet of iron framed; + Vain the all-shattering guns + Unless proud England keep, untamed, + The stout hearts of her sons. + +'All the evils that I have referred to are only symptoms of the one +disease that is sapping the moral, mental and physical life of the +nation, and all attempts to cure these symptoms are foredoomed to +failure, simply because they are the symptoms and not the disease. All +the talk of Temperance, and the attempts to compel temperance, are +foredoomed to failure, because drunkenness is a symptom, and not the +disease. + +'India is a rich productive country. Every year millions of pounds +worth of wealth are produced by her people, only to be stolen from them +by means of the Money Trick by the capitalist and official class. Her +industrious sons and daughters, who are nearly all total abstainers, +live in abject poverty, and their misery is not caused by laziness or +want of thrift, or by Intemperance. They are poor for the same reason +that we are poor--Because we are Robbed. + +'The hundreds of thousands of pounds that are yearly wasted in +well-meant but useless charity accomplish no lasting good, because +while charity soothes the symptoms it ignores the disease, which +is--the PRIVATE OWNERSHIP of the means of producing the necessaries of +life, and the restriction of production, by a few selfish individuals +for their own profit. And for that disease there is no other remedy +than the one I have told you of--the PUBLIC OWNERSHIP and cultivation +of the land, the PUBLIC OWNERSHIP OF the mines, railways, canals, +ships, factories and all the other means of production, and the +establishment of an Industrial Civil Service--a National Army of +Industry--for the purpose of producing the necessaries, comforts and +refinements of life in that abundance which has been made possible by +science and machinery--for the use and benefit of THE WHOLE OF THE +PEOPLE.' + +'Yes: and where's the money to come from for all this?' shouted Crass, +fiercely. + +'Hear, hear,' cried the man behind the moat. + +'There's no money difficulty about it,' replied Barrington. 'We can +easily find all the money we shall need.' + +'Of course,' said Slyme, who had been reading the Daily Ananias, +'there's all the money in the Post Office Savings Bank. The Socialists +could steal that for a start; and as for the mines and land and +factories, they can all be took from the owners by force.' + +'There will be no need for force and no need to steal anything from +anybody.' + +'And there's another thing I objects to,' said Crass. 'And that's all +this 'ere talk about hignorance: wot about all the money wots spent +every year for edication?' + +'You should rather say--"What about all the money that's wasted every +year on education?" What can be more brutal and senseless than trying +to "educate" a poor little, hungry, ill-clad child? Such so-called +"instruction" is like the seed in the parable of the Sower, which fell +on stony ground and withered away because it had no depth of earth; and +even in those cases where it does take root and grow, it becomes like +the seed that fell among thorns and the thorns grew up and choked it, +and it bore no fruit. + +'The majority of us forget in a year or two all that we learnt at +school because the conditions of our lives are such as to destroy all +inclination for culture or refinement. We must see that the children +are properly clothed and fed and that they are not made to get up in +the middle of the night to go to work for several hours before they go +to school. We must make it illegal for any greedy, heartless +profit-hunter to hire them and make them labour for several hours in +the evening after school, or all day and till nearly midnight on +Saturday. We must first see that our children are cared for, as well +as the children of savage races, before we can expect a proper return +for the money that we spend on education.' + +'I don't mind admitting that this 'ere scheme of national ownership and +industries is all right if it could only be done,' said Harlow, 'but at +present, all the land, railways and factories, belongs to private +capitalists; they can't be bought without money, and you say you ain't +goin' to take 'em away by force, so I should like to know how the +bloody 'ell you are goin' to get 'em?' + +'We certainly don't propose to buy them with money, for the simple +reason that there is not sufficient money in existence to pay for them. + +'If all the gold and silver money in the World were gathered together +into one heap, it would scarcely be sufficient to buy all the private +property in England. The people who own all these things now never +really paid for them with money--they obtained possession of them by +means of the "Money Trick" which Owen explained to us some time ago.' + +'They obtained possession of them by usin' their brain,' said Crass. +'Exactly,' replied the lecturer. 'They tell us themselves that that is +how they got them away from us; they call their profits the "wages of +intelligence". Whilst we have been working, they have been using their +intelligence in order to obtain possession of the things we have +created. The time has now arrived for us to use our intelligence in +order to get back the things they have robbed us of, aid to prevent +them from robbing us any more. As for how it is to be done, we might +copy the methods that they have found so successful.' + +'Oh, then you DO mean to rob them after all,' cried Slyme, +triumphantly. 'If it's true that they robbed the workers, and if we're +to adopt the same method then we'll be robbers too!' + +'When a thief is caught having in his possession the property of others +it is not robbery to take the things away from him and to restore them +to their rightful owners,' retorted Barrington. + +'I can't allow this 'ere disorder to go on no longer,' shouted Philpot, +banging the table with the plumber's hammer as several men began +talking at the same time. + +'There will be plenty of tuneropperty for questions and opposition at +the hend of the horation, when the pulpit will be throwed open to +anyone as likes to debate the question. I now calls upon the professor +to proceed with the second part of the horation: and anyone wot +interrupts will get a lick under the ear-'ole with this'--waving the +hammer--'and the body will be chucked out of the bloody winder.' + +Loud cheers greeted this announcement. It was still raining heavily, +so they thought they might as well pass the time listening to +Barrington as in any other way. + +'A large part of the land may be got back in the same way as it was +taken from us. The ancestors of the present holders obtained +possession of it by simply passing Acts of Enclosure: the nation should +regain possession of those lands by passing Acts of Resumption. And +with regard to the other land, the present holders should be allowed to +retain possession of it during their lives and then it should revert to +the State, to be used for the benefit of all. Britain should belong to +the British people, not to a few selfish individuals. As for the +railways, they have already been nationalized in some other countries, +and what other countries can do we can do also. In New Zealand, +Australia, South Africa, Germany, Belgium, Italy, Japan and some other +countries some of the railways are already the property of the State. +As for the method by which we can obtain possession of them, the +difficulty is not to discover a method, but rather to decide which of +many methods we shall adopt. One method would be to simply pass an Act +declaring that as it was contrary to the public interest that they +should be owned by private individuals, the railways would henceforth +be the property of the nation. All railways servants, managers and +officials would continue in their employment; the only difference being +that they would now be in the employ of the State. As to the +shareholders--' + +'They could all be knocked on the 'ead, I suppose,' interrupted Crass. + +'Or go to the workhouse,' said Slyme. + +'Or to 'ell,' suggested the man behind the moat. + +'--The State would continue to pay to the shareholders the same +dividends they had received on an average for, say, the previous three +years. These payments would be continued to the present shareholders +for life, or the payments might be limited to a stated number of years +and the shares would be made non-transferable, like the railway tickets +of today. As for the factories, shops, and other means of production +and distribution, the State must adopt the same methods of doing +business as the present owners. I mean that even as the big Trusts and +companies are crushing--by competition--the individual workers and +small traders, so the State should crush the trusts by competition. It +is surely justifiable for the State to do for the benefit of the whole +people that which the capitalists are already doing for the profit of a +few shareholders. The first step in this direction will be the +establishment of Retail Stores for the purpose of supplying all +national and municipal employees with the necessaries of life at the +lowest possible prices. At first the Administration will purchase +these things from the private manufacturers, in such large quantities +that it will be able to obtain them at the very cheapest rate, and as +there will be no heavy rents to pay for showy shops, and no advertising +expenses, and as the object of the Administration will be not to make +profit, but to supply its workmen and officials with goods at the +lowest price, they will be able to sell them much cheaper than the +profit-making private stores. + +'The National Service Retail Stores will be for the benefit of only +those in the public service; and gold, silver or copper money will not +be accepted in payment for the things sold. At first, all public +servants will continue to be paid in metal money, but those who desire +it will be paid all or part of their wages in paper money of the same +nominal value, which will be accepted in payment for their purchases at +the National Stores and at the National Hotels, Restaurants and other +places which will be established for the convenience of those in the +State service. The money will resemble bank-notes. It will be made of +a special very strong paper, and will be of all value, from a penny to +a pound. + +'As the National Service Stores will sell practically everything that +could be obtained elsewhere, and as twenty shillings in paper money +will be able to purchase much more at the stores than twenty shillings +of metal money would purchase anywhere else, it will not be long before +nearly all public servants will prefer to be paid in paper money. As +far as paying the salaries and wages of most of its officials and +workmen is concerned, the Administration will not then have any need of +metal money. But it will require metal money to pay the private +manufacturers who supply the goods sold in the National Stores. +But--all these things are made by labour; so in order to avoid having +to pay metal money for them, the State will now commence to employ +productive labour. All the public land suitable for the purpose will +be put into cultivation and State factories will be established for +manufacturing food, boots, clothing, furniture and all other +necessaries and comforts of life. All those who are out of employment +and willing to work, will be given employment on these farms and in +these factories. In order that the men employed shall not have to work +unpleasantly hard, and that their hours of labour may be as short as +possible--at first, say, eight hours per day--and also to make sure +that the greatest possible quantity of everything shall be produced, +these factories and farms will be equipped with the most up-to-date and +efficient labour-saving machinery. The people employed in the farms +and factories will be paid with paper money... The commodities they +produce will go to replenish the stocks of the National Service Stores, +where the workers will be able to purchase with their paper money +everything they need. + +'As we shall employ the greatest possible number of labour-saving +machines, and adopt the most scientific methods in our farms and +factories, the quantities of goods we shall be able to produce will be +so enormous that we shall be able to pay our workers very high +wages--in paper money--and we shall be able to sell our produce so +cheaply, that all public servants will be able to enjoy abundance of +everything. + +'When the workers who are being exploited and sweated by the private +capitalists realize how much worse off they are than the workers in the +employ of the State, they will come and ask to be allowed to work for +the State, and also, for paper money. That will mean that the State +Army of Productive Workers will be continually increasing in numbers. +More State factories will be built, more land will be put into +cultivation. Men will be given employment making bricks, woodwork, +paints, glass, wallpapers and all kinds of building materials and +others will be set to work building--on State land--beautiful houses, +which will be let to those employed in the service of the State. The +rent will be paid with paper money. + +'State fishing fleets will be established and the quantities of +commodities of all kinds produced will be so great that the State +employees and officials will not be able to use it all. With their +paper money they will be able to buy enough and more than enough to +satisfy all their needs abundantly, but there will still be a great and +continuously increasing surplus stock in the possession of the State. + +'The Socialist Administration will now acquire or build fleets of steam +trading vessels, which will of course be manned and officered by State +employees--the same as the Royal Navy is now. These fleets of National +trading vessels will carry the surplus stocks I have mentioned, to +foreign countries, and will there sell or exchange them for some of the +products of those countries, things that we do not produce ourselves. +These things will be brought to England and sold at the National +Service Stores, at the lowest possible price, for paper money, to those +in the service of the State. This of course will only have the effect +of introducing greater variety into the stocks--it will not diminish +the surplus: and as there would be no sense in continuing to produce +more of these things than necessary, it would then be the duty of the +Administration to curtail or restrict production of the necessaries of +life. This could be done by reducing the hours of the workers without +reducing their wages so as to enable them to continue to purchase as +much as before. + +'Another way of preventing over production of mere necessaries and +comforts will be to employ a large number of workers producing the +refinements and pleasures of life, more artistic houses, furniture, +pictures, musical instruments and so forth. + +'In the centre of every district a large Institute or pleasure house +could be erected, containing a magnificently appointed and decorated +theatre; Concert Hall, Lecture Hall, Gymnasium, Billiard Rooms, Reading +Rooms, Refreshment Rooms, and so on. A detachment of the Industrial +Army would be employed as actors, artistes, musicians, singers and +entertainers. In fact everyone that could be spared from the most +important work of all--that of producing the necessaries of life--would +be employed in creating pleasure, culture, and education. All these +people--like the other branches of the public service--would be paid +with paper money, and with it all of them would be able to purchase +abundance of all those things which constitute civilization. + +'Meanwhile, as a result of all this, the kind-hearted private employers +and capitalists would find that no one would come and work for them to +be driven and bullied and sweated for a miserable trifle of metal money +that is scarcely enough to purchase sufficient of the necessaries of +life to keep body and soul together. + +'These kind-hearted capitalists will protest against what they will +call the unfair competition of State industry, and some of them may +threaten to leave the country and take their capital with them... As +most of these persons are too lazy to work, and as we will not need +their money, we shall be very glad to see them go. But with regard to +their real capital--their factories, farms, mines or machinery--that +will be a different matter... To allow these things to remain idle and +unproductive would constitute an injury to the community. So a law +will be passed, declaring that all land not cultivated by the owner, or +any factory shut down for more than a specified time, will be taken +possession of by the State and worked for the benefit of the +community... Fair compensation will be paid in paper money to the +former owners, who will be granted an income or pension of so much a +year either for life or for a stated period according to circumstances +and the ages of the persons concerned. + +'As for the private traders, the wholesale and retail dealers in the +things produced by labour, they will be forced by the State competition +to close down their shops and warehouses--first, because they will not +be able to replenish their stocks; and, secondly, because even if they +were able to do so, they would not be able to sell them. This will +throw out of work a great host of people who are at present engaged in +useless occupations; the managers and assistants in the shops of which +we now see half a dozen of the same sort in a single street; the +thousands of men and women who are slaving away their lives producing +advertisements, for, in most cases, a miserable pittance of metal +money, with which many of them are unable to procure sufficient of the +necessaries of life to secure them from starvation. + +'The masons, carpenters, painters, glaziers, and all the others engaged +in maintaining these unnecessary stores and shops will all be thrown +out of employment, but all of them who are willing to work will be +welcomed by the State and will be at once employed helping either to +produce or distribute the necessaries and comforts of life. They will +have to work fewer hours than before... They will not have to work so +hard--for there will be no need to drive or bully, because there will +be plenty of people to do the work, and most of it will be done by +machinery--and with their paper money they will be able to buy +abundance of the things they help to produce. The shops and stores +where these people were formerly employed will be acquired by the +State, which will pay the former owners fair compensation in the same +manner as to the factory owners. Some of the buildings will be +utilized by the State as National Service Stores, others transformed +into factories and others will be pulled down to make room for +dwellings, or public buildings... It will be the duty of the +Government to build a sufficient number of houses to accommodate the +families of all those in its employment, and as a consequence of this +and because of the general disorganization and decay of what is now +called "business", all other house property of all kinds will rapidly +depreciate in value. The slums and the wretched dwellings now occupied +by the working classes--the miserable, uncomfortable, jerry-built +"villas" occupied by the lower middle classes and by "business" people, +will be left empty and valueless upon the hands of their rack renting +landlords, who will very soon voluntarily offer to hand them and the +ground they stand upon to the state on the same terms as those accorded +to the other property owners, namely--in return for a pension. Some of +these people will be content to live in idleness on the income allowed +them for life as compensation by the State: others will devote +themselves to art or science and some others will offer their services +to the community as managers and superintendents, and the State will +always be glad to employ all those who are willing to help in the Great +Work of production and distribution. + +'By this time the nation will be the sole employer of labour, and as no +one will be able to procure the necessaries of life without paper +money, and as the only way to obtain this will be working, it will mean +that every mentally and physically capable person in the community will +be helping in the great work of PRODUCTION and DISTRIBUTION. We shall +not need as at present, to maintain a police force to protect the +property of the idle rich from the starving wretches whom they have +robbed. There will be no unemployed and no overlapping of labour, +which will be organized and concentrated for the accomplishment of the +only rational object--the creation of the things we require... For +every one labour-saving machine in use today, we will, if necessary, +employ a thousand machines! and consequently there will be produced +such a stupendous, enormous, prodigious, overwhelming abundance of +everything that soon the Community will be faced once more with the +serious problem of OVER-PRODUCTION. + +'To deal with this, it will be necessary to reduce the hours of our +workers to four or five hours a day... All young people will be +allowed to continue at public schools and universities and will not be +required to take any part in the work or the nation until they are +twenty-one years of age. At the age of forty-five, everyone will be +allowed to retire from the State service on full pay... All these will +be able to spend the rest of their days according to their own +inclinations; some will settle down quietly at home, and amuse +themselves in the same ways as people of wealth and leisure do at the +present day--with some hobby, or by taking part in the organization of +social functions, such as balls, parties, entertainments, the +organization of Public Games and Athletic Tournaments, Races and all +kinds of sports. + +'Some will prefer to continue in the service of the State. Actors, +artists, sculptors, musicians and others will go on working for their +own pleasure and honour... Some will devote their leisure to science, +art, or literature. Others will prefer to travel on the State +steamships to different parts of the world to see for themselves all +those things of which most of us have now but a dim and vague +conception. The wonders of India and Egypt, the glories of Rome, the +artistic treasures of the continent and the sublime scenery of other +lands. + +'Thus--for the first time in the history of humanity--the benefits and +pleasures conferred upon mankind by science and civilization will be +enjoyed equally by all, upon the one condition, that they shall do +their share of the work, that is necessary in order to, make all these +things possible. + +'These are the principles upon which the CO-OPERATIVE COMMONWEALTH of +the future will be organized. The State in which no one will be +distinguished or honoured above his fellows except for Virtue or +Talent. Where no man will find his profit in another's loss, and we +shall no longer be masters and servants, but brothers, free men, and +friends. Where there will be no weary, broken men and women passing +their joyless lives in toil and want, and no little children crying +because they are hungry or cold. + +'A State wherein it will be possible to put into practice the teachings +of Him whom so many now pretend to follow. A society which shall have +justice and co-operation for its foundation, and International +Brotherhood and love for its law. + + 'Such are the days that shall be! but + What are the deeds of today, + In the days of the years we dwell in, + That wear our lives away? + Why, then, and for what we are waiting? + There are but three words to speak + "We will it," and what is the foreman + but the dream strong wakened and weak? + 'Oh, why and for what are we waiting, while + our brothers droop and die? + And on every wind of the heavens, a + wasted life goes by. + 'How long shall they reproach us, where + crowd on crowd they dwell + Poor ghosts of the wicked city, + gold crushed, hungry hell? + 'Through squalid life they laboured in + sordid grief they died + Those sons of a mighty mother, those + props of England's pride. + They are gone, there is none can undo + it, nor save our souls from the curse, + But many a million cometh, and shall + they be better or worse? + + 'It is We must answer and hasten and open wide the door, + For the rich man's hurrying terror, and the slow foot hope of + the poor, + Yea, the voiceless wrath of the wretched and their unlearned + discontent, + We must give it voice and wisdom, till the waiting tide be + spent + Come then since all things call us, the living and the dead, + And o'er the weltering tangle a glimmering light is shed.' + +As Barrington descended from the Pulpit and walked back to his +accustomed seat, a loud shout of applause burst from a few men in the +crowd, who stood up and waved their caps and cheered again and again. +When order was restored, Philpot rose and addressed the meeting: + +'Is there any gentleman wot would like to ask the Speaker a question?' + +No one spoke and the Chairman again put the question without obtaining +any response, but at length one of the new hands who had been 'taken +on' about a week previously to replace another painter who had been +sacked for being too slow--stood up and said there was one point that +he would like a little more information about. This man had two +patches on the seat of his trousers, which were also very much frayed +and ragged at the bottoms of the legs: the lining of his coat was all +in rags, as were also the bottoms of the sleeves; his boots were old +and had been many times mended and patched; the sole of one of them had +begun to separate from the upper and he had sewn these parts together +with a few stitches of copper wire. He had been out of employment for +several weeks and it was evident from the pinched expression of his +still haggard face that during that time he had not had sufficient to +eat. This man was not a drunkard, neither was he one of those +semi-mythical persons who are too lazy to work. He was married and had +several children. One of them, a boy of fourteen years old, earned +five shillings a week as a light porter at a Grocer's. + +Being a householder the man had a vote, but he had never hitherto taken +much interest in what he called 'politics'. In his opinion, those +matters were not for the likes of him. He believed in leaving such +difficult subjects to be dealt with by his betters. In his present +unhappy condition he was a walking testimonial to the wisdom and virtue +and benevolence of those same 'betters' who have hitherto managed the +affairs of the world with results so very satisfactory for themselves. + +'I should like to ask the speaker,' he said, 'supposin' all this that +'e talks about is done--what's to become of the King, and the Royal +Family, and all the Big Pots?' + +''Ear, 'ear,' cried Crass, eagerly--and Ned Dawson and the man behind +the moat both said that that was what they would like to know, too. + +'I am much more concerned about what is to become of ourselves if these +things are not done,' replied Barrington. 'I think we should try to +cultivate a little more respect of our own families and to concern +ourselves a little less about "Royal" Families. I fail to see any +reason why we should worry ourselves about those people; they're all +right--they have all they need, and as far as I am aware, nobody wishes +to harm them and they are well able to look after themselves. They will +fare the same as the other rich people.' + +'I should like to ask,' said Harlow, 'wot's to become of all the gold +and silver and copper money? Wouldn't it be of no use at all?' + +'It would be of far more use under Socialism than it is at present. The +State would of course become possessed of a large quantity of it in the +early stages of the development of the Socialist system, because--at +first--while the State would be paying all its officers and productive +workers in paper, the rest of the community--those not in State +employ--would be paying their taxes in gold as at present. All +travellers on the State railways--other than State employees--would pay +their fares in metal money, and gold and silver would pour into the +State Treasury from many other sources. The State would receive gold +and silver and--for the most part--pay out paper. By the time the +system of State employment was fully established, gold and silver would +only be of value as metal and the State would purchase it from whoever +possessed and wished to sell it--at so much per pound as raw material: +instead of hiding it away in the vaults of banks, or locking it up in +iron safes, we shall make use of it. Some of the gold will be +manufactured into articles of jewellery, to be sold for paper money and +worn by the sweethearts and wives and daughters of the workers; some of +it will be beaten out into gold leaf to be used in the decoration of +the houses of the citizens and of public buildings. As for the silver, +it will be made into various articles of utility for domestic use. The +workers will not then, as now, have to eat their food with poisonous +lead or brass spoons and forks, we shall have these things of silver +and if there is not enough silver we shall probably have a +non-poisonous alloy of that metal.' + +'As far as I can make out,' said Harlow, 'the paper money will be just +as valuable as gold and silver is now. Well, wot's to prevent artful +dodgers like old Misery and Rushton saving it up and buying and selling +things with it, and so livin' without work?' + +'Of course,' said Crass, scornfully. 'It would never do!' + +'That's a very simple matter; any man who lives without doing any +useful work is living on the labour of others, he is robbing others of +part of the result of their labour. The object of Socialism is to stop +this robbery, to make it impossible. So no one will be able to hoard +up or accumulate the paper money because it will be dated, and will +become worthless if it is not spent within a certain time after its +issue. As for buying and selling for profit--from whom would they buy? +And to whom would they sell?' + +'Well, they might buy some of the things the workers didn't want, for +less than the workers paid for them, and then they could sell 'em +again.' + +'They'd have to sell them for less than the price charged at the +National Stores, and if you think about it a little you'll see that it +would not be very profitable. It would be with the object of +preventing any attempts at private trading that the Administration +would refuse to pay compensation to private owners in a lump sum. All +such compensations would be paid, as I said, in the form of a pension +of so much per year. + +'Another very effective way to prevent private trading would be to make +it a criminal offence against the well-being of the community. At +present many forms of business are illegal unless you take out a +licence; under Socialism no one would be allowed to trade without a +licence, and no licences would be issued.' + +'Wouldn't a man be allowed to save up his money if he wanted to, +demanded Slyme with indignation. + +'There will be nothing to prevent a man going without some of the +things he might have if he is foolish enough to do so, but he would +never be able to save up enough to avoid doing his share of useful +service. Besides, what need would there be for anyone to save? One's +old age would be provided for. No one could ever be out of employment. +If one was ill the State hospitals and Medical Service would be free. +As for one's children, they would attend the State Free Schools and +Colleges and when of age they would enter the State Service, their +futures provided for. Can you tell us why anyone would need or wish to +save?' + +Slyme couldn't. + +'Are there any more questions?' demanded Philpot. + +'While we are speaking of money,' added Barrington, 'I should like to +remind you that even under the present system there are many things +which cost money to maintain, that we enjoy without having to pay for +directly. The public roads and pavements cost money to make and +maintain and light. So do the parks, museums and bridges. But they +are free to all. Under a Socialist Administration this principle will +be extended--in addition to the free services we enjoy now we shall +then maintain the trains and railways for the use of the public, free. +And as time goes on, this method of doing business will be adopted in +many other directions.' + +'I've read somewhere,' said Harlow, 'that whenever a Government in any +country has started issuing paper money it has always led to +bankruptcy. How do you know that the same thing would not happen under +a Socialist Administration?' + +''Ear, 'ear,' said Crass. 'I was just goin' to say the same thing.' + +'If the Government of a country began to issue large amounts of paper +money under the present system,' Barrington replied, 'it would +inevitably lead to bankruptcy, for the simple reason that paper money +under the present system--bank-notes, bank drafts, postal orders, +cheques or any other form--is merely a printed promise to pay the +amount--in gold or silver--on demand or at a certain date. Under the +present system if a Government issues more paper money than it +possesses gold and silver to redeem, it is of course bankrupt. But the +paper money that will be issued under a Socialist Administration will +not be a promise to pay in gold or silver on demand or at any time. It +will be a promise to supply commodities to the amount specified on the +note, and as there could be no dearth of those things there could be no +possibility of bankruptcy.' + +'I should like to know who's goin' to appoint the hofficers of this +'ere hindustrial harmy,' said the man on the pail. 'We don't want to +be bullied and chivied and chased about by a lot of sergeants and +corporals like a lot of soldiers, you know.' + +''Ear, 'ear,' said Crass. 'You must 'ave some masters. Someone's got +to be in charge of the work.' + +'We don't have to put up with any bullying or chivying or chasing now, +do we?' said Barrington. 'So of course we could not have anything of +that sort under Socialism. We could not put up with it at all! Even +if it were only for four or five hours a day. Under the present system +we have no voice in appointing our masters and overseers and +foremen--we have no choice as to what master we shall work under. If +our masters do not treat us fairly we have no remedy against them. +Under Socialism it will be different; the workers will be part of the +community; the officers or managers and foremen will be the servants of +the community, and if any one of these men were to abuse his position +he could be promptly removed. As for the details of the organization +of the Industrial Army, the difficulty is, again, not so much to devise +a way, but to decide which of many ways would be the best, and the +perfect way will probably be developed only after experiment and +experience. The one thing we have to hold fast to is the fundamental +principle of State employment or National service. Production for use +and not for profit. The national organization of industry under +democratic control. One way of arranging this business would be for +the community to elect a Parliament in much the same way as is done at +present. The only persons eligible for election to be veterans of the +industrial Army, men and women who had put in their twenty-five years +of service. + +'This Administrative Body would have control of the different State +Departments. There would be a Department of Agriculture, a Department +of Railways and so on, each with its minister and staff. + +'All these Members of Parliament would be the relatives--in some cases +the mothers and fathers of those in the Industrial Service, and they +would be relied upon to see that the conditions of that service were +the best possible. + +'As for the different branches of the State Service, they could be +organized on somewhat the same lines as the different branches of the +Public Service are now--like the Navy, the Post Office and as the State +Railways in some other countries, or as are the different branches of +the Military Army, with the difference that all promotions will be from +the ranks, by examinations, and by merit only. As every recruit will +have had the same class of education they will all have absolute +equality of opportunity and the men who would attain to positions of +authority would be the best men, and not as at present, the worst.' + +'How do you make that out?' demanded Crass. + +'Under the present system, the men who become masters and employers +succeed because they are cunning and selfish, not because they +understand or are capable of doing the work out of which they make +their money. Most of the employers in the building trade for instance +would be incapable of doing any skilled work. Very few of them would +be worth their salt as journeymen. The only work they do is to scheme +to reap the benefit of the labour of others. + +'The men who now become managers and foremen are selected not because +of their ability as craftsmen, but because they are good slave-drivers +and useful producers of profit for their employers.' + +'How are you goin' to prevent the selfish and cunnin', as you call 'em, +from gettin' on top THEN as they do now?' said Harlow. + +'The fact that all workers will receive the same pay, no matter what +class of work they are engaged in, or what their position, will ensure +our getting the very best man to do all the higher work and to organize +our business.' + +Crass laughed: 'What! Everybody to get the same wages?' + +'Yes: there will be such an enormous quantity of everything produced, +that their wages will enable everyone to purchase abundance of +everything they require. Even if some were paid more than others they +would not be able to spend it. There would be no need to save it, and +as there will be no starving poor, there will be no one to give it away +to. If it were possible to save and accumulate money it would bring +into being an idle class, living on their fellows: it would lead to the +downfall of our system, and a return to the same anarchy that exists at +present. Besides, if higher wages were paid to those engaged in the +higher work or occupying positions of authority it would prevent our +getting the best men. Unfit persons would try for the positions +because of the higher pay. That is what happens now. Under the present +system men intrigue for and obtain or are pitchforked into positions +for which they have no natural ability at all; the only reason they +desire these positions is because of the salaries attached to them. +These fellows get the money and the work is done by underpaid +subordinates whom the world never hears of. Under Socialism, this money +incentive will be done away with, and consequently the only men who +will try for these positions will be those who, being naturally fitted +for the work, would like to do it. For instance a man who is a born +organizer will not refuse to undertake such work because he will not be +paid more for it. Such a man will desire to do it and will esteem it a +privilege to be allowed to do it. He will revel in it. To think out +all the details of some undertaking, to plan and scheme and organize, +is not work for a man like that. It is a pleasure. But for a man who +has sought and secured such a position, not because he liked the work, +but because he liked the salary--such work as this would be unpleasant +labour. Under Socialism the unfit man would not apply for that post but +would strive after some other for which he was fit and which he would +therefore desire and enjoy. There are some men who would rather have +charge of and organize and be responsible for work than do it with +their hands. There are others who would rather do delicate or +difficult or artistic work, than plain work. A man who is a born +artist would rather paint a frieze or a picture or carve a statue than +he would do plain work, or take charge of and direct the labour of +others. And there are another sort of men who would rather do ordinary +plain work than take charge, or attempt higher branches for which they +have neither liking or natural talent. + +'But there is one thing--a most important point that you seem to +entirely lose sight of, and that is, that all these different kinds and +classes are equal in one respect--THEY ARE ALL EQUALLY NECESSARY. Each +is a necessary and indispensable part of the whole; therefore everyone +who has done his full share of necessary work is justly entitled to a +full share of the results. The men who put the slates on are just as +indispensable as the men who lay the foundations. The work of the men +who build the walls and make the doors is just as necessary as the work +of the men who decorate the cornice. None of them would be of much use +without the architect, and the plans of the architect would come to +nothing, his building would be a mere castle in the air, if it were not +for the other workers. Each part of the work is equally necessary, +useful and indispensable if the building is to be perfected. Some of +these men work harder with their brains than with their hands and some +work harder with their hands than with their brains, BUT EACH ONE DOES +HIS FULL SHARE OF THE WORK. This truth will be recognized and acted +upon by those who build up and maintain the fabric of our Co-operative +Commonwealth. Every man who does his full share of the useful and +necessary work according to his abilities shall have his full share of +the total result. Herein will be its great difference from the present +system, under which it is possible for the cunning and selfish ones to +take advantage of the simplicity of others and rob them of part of the +fruits of their labour. As for those who will be engaged in the higher +branches, they will be sufficiently rewarded by being privileged to do +the work they are fitted for and enjoy. The only men and women who are +capable of good and great work of any kind are those who, being +naturally fit for it, love the work for its own sake and not for the +money it brings them. Under the present system, many men who have no +need of money produce great works, not for gain but for pleasure: their +wealth enables them to follow their natural inclinations. Under the +present system many men and women capable of great works are prevented +from giving expression to their powers by poverty and lack of +opportunity: they live in sorrow and die heartbroken, and the community +is the loser. These are the men and women who will be our artists, +sculptors, architects, engineers and captains of industry. + +'Under the present system there are men at the head of affairs whose +only object is the accumulation of money. Some of them possess great +abilities and the system has practically compelled them to employ those +abilities for their own selfish ends to the hurt of the community. +Some of them have built up great fortunes out of the sweat and blood +and tears of men and women and little children. For those who delight +in such work as this, there will be no place in our Co-operative +Commonwealth.' + +'Is there any more questions?' demanded Philpot. + +'Yes,' said Harlow. 'If there won't be no extry pay and if anybody +will have all they need for just doing their part of the work, what +encouragement will there be for anyone to worry his brains out trying +to invent some new machine, or make some new discovery?' + +'Well,' said Barrington, 'I think that's covered by the last answer, +but if it were found necessary--which is highly improbable--to offer +some material reward in addition to the respect, esteem or honour that +would be enjoyed by the author of an invention that was a boon to the +community, it could be arranged by allowing him to retire before the +expiration of his twenty-five years service. The boon he had conferred +on the community by the invention, would be considered equivalent to so +many years work. But a man like that would not desire to cease +working; that sort go on working all their lives, for love. There's +Edison for instance. He is one of the very few inventors who have made +money out of their work; he is a rich man, but the only use his wealth +seems to be to him is to procure himself facilities for going on with +his work; his life is a round of what some people would call painful +labour: but it is not painful labour to him; it's just pleasure, he +works for the love of it. Another way would be to absolve a man of +that sort from the necessity of ordinary work, so as to give him a +chance to get on with other inventions. It would be to the interests +of the community to encourage him in every way and to place materials +and facilities at his disposal. + +'But you must remember that even under the present system, Honour and +Praise are held to be greater than money. How many soldiers would +prefer money to the honour of wearing the intrinsically valueless +Victoria Cross? + +'Even now men think less of money than they do of the respect, esteem +or honour they are able to procure with it. Many men spend the greater +part of their lives striving to accumulate money, and when they have +succeeded, they proceed to spend it to obtain the respect of their +fellow-men. Some of them spend thousands of pounds for the honour of +being able to write "MP" after their names. Others buy titles. Others +pay huge sums to gain admission to exclusive circles of society. +Others give the money away in charity, or found libraries or +universities. The reason they do these things is that they desire to +be applauded and honoured by their fellow-men. + +'This desire is strongest in the most capable men--the men of genius. +Therefore, under Socialism the principal incentive to great work will +be the same as now--Honour and Praise. But, under the present system, +Honour and Praise can be bought with money, and it does not matter much +how the money was obtained. + +'Under Socialism it will be different. The Cross of Honour and the +Laurel Crown will not be bought and sold for filthy lucre. They will +be the supreme rewards of Virtue and of Talent.' + +'Anyone else like to be flattened Out?' inquired Philpot. + +'What would you do with them what spends all their money in drink?' +asked Slyme. + +'I might reasonably ask you, "What's done with them or what you propose +to do with them now?" There are many men and women whose lives are so +full of toil and sorrow and the misery caused by abject poverty, who +are so shut out from all that makes life worth living, that the time +they spend in the public house is the only ray of sunshine in their +cheerless lives. Their mental and material poverty is so great that +they are deprived of and incapable of understanding the intellectual +and social pleasures of civilization... Under Socialism there will be +no such class as this. Everyone will be educated, and social life and +rational pleasure will be within the reach of all. Therefore we do not +believe that there will be such a class. Any individuals who abandoned +themselves to such a course would be avoided by their fellows; but if +they became very degraded, we should still remember that they were our +brother men and women, and we should regard them as suffering from a +disease inherited from their uncivilized forefathers and try to cure +them by placing them under some restraint: in an institute for +instance.' + +'Another good way to deal with 'em,' said Harlow, 'would be to allow +them double pay, so as they could drink themselves to death. We could +do without the likes of them.' + +'Call the next case,' said Philpot. + +'This 'ere abundance that you're always talking about,' said Crass, you +can't be sure that it would be possible to produce all that. You're +only assoomin' that it could be done.' + +Barrington pointed to the still visible outlines of the 'Hoblong' that +Owen had drawn on the wall to illustrate a previous lecture. + +'Even under the present silly system of restricted production, with the +majority of the population engaged in useless, unproductive, +unnecessary work, and large numbers never doing any work at all, there +is enough produced to go all round after a fashion. More than enough, +for in consequence of what they call "Over-Production", the markets are +periodically glutted with commodities of all kinds, and then for a time +the factories are closed and production ceases. And yet we can all +manage to exist--after a fashion. This proves that if productive +industry were organized on the lines advocated by Socialists there +could be produced such a prodigious quantity of everything, that +everyone could live in plenty and comfort. The problem of how to +produce sufficient for all to enjoy abundance is already solved: the +problem that then remains is--How to get rid of those whose greed and +callous indifference to the sufferings of others, prevents it being +done.' + +'Yes! and you'll never be able to get rid of 'em, mate,' cried Crass, +triumphantly--and the man with the copper wire stitches in his boot +said that it couldn't be done. + +'Well, we mean to have a good try, anyhow,' said Barrington. + +Crass and most of the others tried hard to think of something to say in +defence of the existing state of affairs, or against the proposals put +forward by the lecturer; but finding nothing, they maintained a sullen +and gloomy silence. The man with the copper wire stitches in his boot +in particular appeared to be very much upset; perhaps he was afraid +that if the things advocated by the speaker ever came to pass he would +not have any boots at all. To assume that he had some such thought as +this, is the only rational way to account for his hostility, for in his +case no change could have been for the worse unless it reduced him to +almost absolute nakedness and starvation. + +To judge by their unwillingness to consider any proposals to alter the +present system, one might have supposed that they were afraid of losing +something, instead of having nothing to lose--except their poverty. + +It was not till the chairman had made several urgent appeals for more +questions that Crass brightened up: a glad smile slowly spread over and +illuminated his greasy visage: he had at last thought of a most serious +and insurmountable obstacle to the establishment of the Co-operative +Commonwealth. + +'What,' he demanded, in a loud voice, 'what are you goin' to do, in +this 'ere Socialist Republic of yours, with them wot WON'T WORK'!' + +As Crass flung this bombshell into the Socialist camp, the miserable, +ragged-trousered crew around him could scarce forbear a cheer; but the +more intelligent part of the audience only laughed. + +'We don't believe that there will be any such people as that,' said +Barrington. + +'There's plenty of 'em about now, anyway,' sneered Crass. + +'You can't change 'uman nature, you know,' cried the man behind the +moat, and the one who had the copper wire stitches in his boot laughed +scornfully. + +'Yes, I know there are plenty such now,' rejoined Barrington. 'It's +only what is to be expected, considering that practically all workers +live in poverty, and are regarded with contempt. The conditions under +which most of the work is done at present are so unpleasant and +degrading that everyone refuses to do any unless they are compelled; +none of us here, for instance, would continue to work for Rushton if it +were not for the fact that we have either to do so or starve; and when +we do work we only just earn enough to keep body and soul together. +Under the present system everybody who can possibly manage to do so +avoids doing any work, the only difference being that some people do +their loafing better than others. The aristocracy are too lazy to +work, but they seem to get on all right; they have their tenants to +work for them. Rushton is too lazy to work, so he has arranged that we +and Nimrod shall work instead, and he fares much better than any of us +who do work. Then there is another kind of loafers who go about +begging and occasionally starving rather than submit to such abominable +conditions as are offered to them. These last are generally not much +worse off than we are and they are often better off. At present, +people have everything to gain and but little to lose by refusing to +work. Under Socialism it would be just the reverse; the conditions of +labour would be so pleasant, the hours of obligatory work so few, and +the reward so great, that it is absurd to imagine that any one would be +so foolish as to incur the contempt of his fellows and make himself a +social outcast by refusing to do the small share of work demanded of +him by the community of which he was a member. + +'As for what we should do to such individuals if there did happen to be +some, I can assure you that we would not treat them as you treat them +now. We would not dress them up in silk and satin and broadcloth and +fine linen: we would not embellish them, as you do, with jewels of gold +and jewels of silver and with precious stones; neither should we allow +them to fare sumptuously every day. Our method of dealing with them +would be quite different from yours. In the Co-operative Commonwealth +there will be no place for loafers; whether they call themselves +aristocrats or tramps, those who are too lazy to work shall have no +share in the things that are produced by the labour of others. Those +who do nothing shall have nothing. If any man will not work, neither +shall he eat. Under the present system a man who is really too lazy to +work may stop you in the street and tell you that he cannot get +employment. For all you know, he may be telling the truth, and if you +have any feeling and are able, you will help him. But in the Socialist +State no one would have such an excuse, because everyone that was +willing would be welcome to come and help in the work of producing +wealth and happiness for all, and afterwards he would also be welcome +to his full share of the results.' + +'Any more complaints?' inquired the chairman, breaking the gloomy +silence that followed. + +'I don't want anyone to think that I am blaming any of these +present-day loafers,' Barrington added. 'The wealthy ones cannot be +expected voluntarily to come and work under existing conditions and if +they were to do so they would be doing more harm than good--they would +be doing some poor wretches out of employment. They are not to be +blamed; the people who are to blame are the working classes themselves, +who demand and vote for the continuance of the present system. As for +the other class of loafers--those at the bottom, the tramps and people +of that sort, if they were to become sober and industrious tomorrow, +they also would be doing more harm than good to the other workers; it +would increase the competition for work. If all the loafers in +Mugsborough could suddenly be transformed into decent house painters +next week, Nimrod might be able to cut down the wages another penny an +hour. I don't wish to speak disrespectfully of these tramps at all. +Some of them are such simply because they would rather starve than +submit to the degrading conditions that we submit to, they do not see +the force of being bullied and chased, and driven about in order to +gain semi-starvation and rags. They are able to get those without +working; and I sometimes think that they are more worthy of respect and +are altogether a nobler type of beings than a lot of broken-spirited +wretches like ourselves, who are always at the mercy of our masters, +and always in dread of the sack.' + +'Any more questions?' said the chairman. + +'Do you mean to say as the time will ever come when the gentry will mix +up on equal terms with the likes of us?' demanded the man behind the +moat, scornfully. + +'Oh, no,' replied the lecturer. When we get Socialism there won't be +any people like us. Everybody will be civilized.' + +The man behind the moat did not seem very satisfied with this answer, +and told the others that he could not see anything to laugh at. + +'Is there any more questions?' cried Philpot. 'Now is your chance to +get some of your own back, but don't hall speak at once.' + +'I should like to know who's goin' to do all the dirty work?' said +Slyme. 'If everyone is to be allowed to choose 'is own trade, who'd be +fool enough to choose to be a scavenger, a sweep, a dustman or a sewer +man? nobody wouldn't want to do such jobs as them and everyone would be +after the soft jobs.' + +'Of course,' cried Crass, eagerly clutching at this last straw. 'The +thing sounds all right till you comes to look into it, but it wouldn't +never work!' + +'It would be very easy to deal with any difficulty of that sort,' +replied Barrington, 'if it were found that too many people were +desirous of pursuing certain callings, it would be known that the +conditions attached to those kinds of work were unfairly easy, as +compared with other lines, so the conditions in those trades would be +made more severe. A higher degree of skill would be required. If we +found that too many persons wished to be doctors, architects, engineers +and so forth, we would increase the severity of the examinations. This +would scare away all but the most gifted and enthusiastic. We should +thus at one stroke reduce the number of applicants and secure the very +best men for the work--we should have better doctors, better +architects, better engineers than before. + +'As regards those disagreeable tasks for which there was a difficulty +in obtaining volunteers, we should adopt the opposite means. Suppose +that six hours was the general thing; and we found that we could not +get any sewer men; we should reduce the hours of labour in that +department to four, or if necessary to two, in order to compensate for +the disagreeable nature of the work. + +'Another way out of such difficulties would be to have a separate +division of the Industrial army to do all such work, and to make it +obligatory for every man to put in his first year of State service as a +member of this corps. There would be no hardship in that. Everyone +gets the benefit of such work; there would be no injustice in requiring +everyone to share. This would have the effect also of stimulating +invention; it would be to everyone's interest to think out means of +doing away with such kinds of work and there is no doubt that most of +it will be done by machinery in some way or other. A few years ago the +only way to light up the streets of a town was to go round to each +separate gas lamp and light each jet, one at a time: now, we press a +few buttons and light up the town with electricity. In the future we +shall probably be able to press a button and flush the sewers.' + +'What about religion?' said Slyme. 'I suppose there won't be no +churches nor chapels; we shall all have to be atheists.' + +'Everybody will be perfectly free to enjoy their own opinions and to +practise any religion they like; but no religion or sect will be +maintained by the State. If any congregation or body of people wish to +have a building for their own exclusive use as a church or chapel or +lecture hall it will be supplied to them by the State on the same terms +as those upon which dwelling houses will be supplied; the State will +construct the special kind of building and the congregation will have +to pay the rent, the amount to be based on the cost of construction, in +paper money of course. As far as the embellishment or decoration of +such places is concerned, there will of course be nothing to prevent +the members of the congregation if they wish from doing any such work +as that themselves in their own spare time of which they will have +plenty.' + +'If everybody's got to do their share of work, where's the minister and +clergymen to come from?' + +'There are at least three ways out of that difficulty. First, +ministers of religion could be drawn from the ranks of the +Veterans--men over forty-five years old who had completed their term of +State service. You must remember that these will not be worn out +wrecks, as too many of the working classes are at that age now. They +will have had good food and clothing and good general conditions all +their lives; and consequently they will be in the very prime of life. +They will be younger than many of us now are at thirty; they will be +ideal men for the positions we are speaking of. All well educated in +their youth, and all will have had plenty of leisure for self culture +during the years of their State service and they will have the +additional recommendation that their congregation will not be required +to pay anything for their services. + +'Another way: If a congregation wished to retain the full-time services +of a young man whom they thought specially gifted but who had not +completed his term of State service, they could secure him by paying +the State for his services; thus the young man would still remain in +State employment, he would still continue to receive his pay from the +National Treasury, and at the age of forty-five would be entitled to +his pension like any other worker, and after that the congregation +would not have to pay the State anything. + +'A third--and as it seems to me, the most respectable way--would be for +the individual in question to act as minister or pastor or lecturer or +whatever it was, to the congregation without seeking to get out of +doing his share of the State service. The hours of obligatory work +would be so short and the work so light that he would have abundance of +leisure to prepare his orations without sponging on his +co-religionists.' + +''Ear, 'ear!' cried Harlow. + +'Of course,' added Barrington, 'it would not only be congregations of +Christians who could adopt any of these methods. It is possible that a +congregation of agnostics, for instance, might want a separate building +or to maintain a lecturer.' + +'What the 'ell's an agnostic?' demanded Bundy. + +'An agnostic,' said the man behind the moat, 'is a bloke wot don't +believe nothing unless 'e see it with 'is own eyes.' + +'All these details,' continued the speaker, 'of the organization of +affairs and the work of the Co-operative Commonwealth, are things which +do not concern us at all. They have merely been suggested by different +individuals as showing some ways in which these things could be +arranged. The exact methods to be adopted will be decided upon by the +opinion of the majority when the work is being done. Meantime, what we +have to do is to insist upon the duty of the State to provide +productive work for the unemployed, the State feeding of +schoolchildren, the nationalization or Socialization of Railways; Land; +the Trusts, and all public services that are still in the hands of +private companies. If you wish to see these things done, you must +cease from voting for Liberal and Tory sweaters, shareholders of +companies, lawyers, aristocrats, and capitalists; and you must fill the +House of Commons with Revolutionary Socialists. That is--with men who +are in favour of completely changing the present system. And in the +day that you do that, you will have solved the poverty "problem". No +more tramping the streets begging for a job! No more hungry children +at home. No more broken boots and ragged clothes. No more women and +children killing themselves with painful labour whilst strong men stand +idly by; but joyous work and joyous leisure for all.' + +'Is there any more questions?' cried Philpot. + +'Is it true,' said Easton, 'that Socialists intend to do away with the +Army and Navy?' + +'Yes; it is true. Socialists believe in International Brotherhood and +peace. Nearly all wars are caused by profit-seeking capitalists, +seeking new fields for commercial exploitation, and by aristocrats who +make it the means of glorifying themselves in the eyes of the deluded +common people. You must remember that Socialism is not only a +national, but an international movement and when it is realized, there +will be no possibility of war, and we shall no longer need to maintain +an army and navy, or to waste a lot of labour building warships or +manufacturing arms and ammunition. All those people who are now +employed will then be at liberty to assist in the great work of +producing the benefits of civilization; creating wealth and knowledge +and happiness for themselves and others--Socialism means Peace on earth +and goodwill to all mankind. But in the meantime we know that the +people of other nations are not yet all Socialists; we do not forget +that in foreign countries--just the same as in Britain--there are large +numbers of profit seeking capitalists, who are so destitute of +humanity, that if they thought it could be done successfully and with +profit to themselves they would not scruple to come here to murder and +to rob. We do not forget that in foreign countries--the same as +here--there are plenty of so-called "Christian" bishops and priests +always ready to give their benediction to any such murderous projects, +and to blasphemously pray to the Supreme Being to help his children to +slay each other like wild beasts. And knowing and remembering all +this, we realize that until we have done away with capitalism, +aristocracy and anti-Christian clericalism, it is our duty to be +prepared to defend our homes and our native land. And therefore we are +in favour of maintaining national defensive forces in the highest +possible state of efficiency. But that does not mean that we are in +favour of the present system of organizing those forces. We do not +believe in conscription, and we do not believe that the nation should +continue to maintain a professional standing army to be used at home +for the purpose of butchering men and women of the working classes in +the interests of a handful of capitalists, as has been done at +Featherstone and Belfast; or to be used abroad to murder and rob the +people of other nations. Socialists advocate the establishment of a +National Citizen Army, for defensive purposes only. We believe that +every able bodied man should be compelled to belong to this force and +to undergo a course of military training, but without making him into a +professional soldier, or taking him away from civil life, depriving him +of the rights of citizenship or making him subject to military "law" +which is only another name for tyranny and despotism. This Citizen +Army could be organized on somewhat similar lines to the present +Territorial Force, with certain differences. For instance, we do not +believe--as our present rulers do--that wealth and aristocratic +influence are the two most essential qualifications for an efficient +officer; we believe that all ranks should be attainable by any man, no +matter how poor, who is capable of passing the necessary examinations, +and that there should be no expense attached to those positions which +the Government grant, or the pay, is not sufficient to cover. The +officers could be appointed in any one of several ways: They might be +elected by the men they would have to command, the only qualification +required being that they had passed their examinations, or they might +be appointed according to merit--the candidate obtaining the highest +number of marks at the examinations to have the first call on any +vacant post, and so on in order of merit. We believe in the total +abolition of courts martial, any offence against discipline should be +punishable by the ordinary civil law--no member of the Citizen Army +being deprived of the rights of a citizen.' + +'What about the Navy?' cried several voices. + +'Nobody wants to interfere with the Navy except to make its +organization more democratic--the same as that of the Citizen Army--and +to protect its members from tyranny by entitling them to be tried in a +civil court for any alleged offence. + +'It has been proved that if the soil of this country were +scientifically cultivated, it is capable of producing sufficient to +maintain a population of a hundred millions of people. Our present +population is only about forty millions, but so long as the land +remains in the possession of persons who refuse to allow it to be +cultivated we shall continue to be dependent on other countries for our +food supply. So long as we are in that position, and so long as +foreign countries are governed by Liberal and Tory capitalists, we +shall need the Navy to protect our overseas commerce from them. If we +had a Citizen Army such as I have mentioned, of nine or ten millions of +men and if the land of this country was properly cultivated, we should +be invincible at home. No foreign power would ever be mad enough to +attempt to land their forces on our shores. But they would now be able +to starve us all to death in a month if it were not for the Navy. It's +a sensible and creditable position, isn't it?' concluded Barrington. +'Even in times of peace, thousands of people standing idle and tamely +starving in their own fertile country, because a few land "Lords" +forbid them to cultivate it.' + +'Is there any more questions?' demanded Philpot, breaking a prolonged +silence. + +'Would any Liberal or Tory capitalist like to get up into the pulpit +and oppose the speaker?' the chairman went on, finding that no one +responded to his appeal for questions. + +The silence continued. + +'As there's no more questions and no one won't get up into the pulpit, +it is now my painful duty to call upon someone to move a resolution.' + +'Well, Mr Chairman,' said Harlow, 'I may say that when I came on this +firm I was a Liberal, but through listenin' to several lectures by +Professor Owen and attendin' the meetings on the hill at Windley and +reading the books and pamphlets I bought there and from Owen, I came to +the conclusion some time ago that it's a mug's game for us to vote for +capitalists whether they calls theirselves Liberals or Tories. They're +all alike when you're workin' for 'em; I defy any man to say what's the +difference between a Liberal and a Tory employer. There is none--there +can't be; they're both sweaters, and they've got to be, or they +wouldn't be able to compete with each other. And since that's what +they are, I say it's a mug's game for us to vote 'em into Parliament to +rule over us and to make laws that we've got to abide by whether we +like it or not. There's nothing to choose between 'em, and the proof of +it is that it's never made much difference to us which party was in or +which was out. It's quite true that in the past both of 'em have +passed good laws, but they've only done it when public opinion was so +strong in favour of it that they knew there was no getting out of it, +and then it was a toss up which side did it. + +'That's the way I've been lookin' at things lately, and I'd almost made +up my mind never to vote no more, or to trouble myself about politics +at all, because although I could see there was no sense in voting for +Liberal or Tory capitalists, at the same time I must admit I couldn't +make out how Socialism was going to help us. But the explanation of it +which Professor Barrington has given us this afternoon has been a bit +of an eye opener for me, and with your permission I should like to move +as a resolution, "That it is the opinion of this meeting that Socialism +is the only remedy for Unemployment and Poverty."' + +The conclusion of Harlow's address was greeted with loud cheers from +the Socialists, but most of the Liberal and Tory supporters of the +present system maintained a sulky silence. + +'I'll second that resolution,' said Easton. + +'And I'll lay a bob both ways,' remarked Bundy. The resolution was +then put, and though the majority were against it, the Chairman +declared it was carried unanimously. + +By this time the violence of the storm had in a great measure abated, +but as rain was still falling it was decided not to attempt to resume +work that day. Besides, it would have been too late, even if the +weather had cleared up. + +'P'raps it's just as well it 'as rained,' remarked one man. 'If it +'adn't some of us might 'ave got the sack tonight. As it is, there'll +be hardly enough for all of us to do tomorrer and Saturday mornin' even +if it is fine.' + +This was true: nearly all the outside was finished, and what remained +to be done was ready for the final coat. Inside all there was to do +was to colour wash the walls and to give the woodwork of the kitchen +and scullery the last coat of paint. + +It was inevitable--unless the firm had some other work for them to do +somewhere else--that there would be a great slaughter on Saturday. + +'Now,' said Philpot, assuming what he meant to be the manner of a +school teacher addressing children, 'I wants you hall to make a +speshall heffort and get 'ere very early in the mornin'--say about four +o'clock--and them wot doos the most work tomorrer, will get a prize on +Saturday.' + +'What'll it be, the sack?' inquired Harlow. + +'Yes,' replied Philpot, 'and not honly will you get a prize for good +conduck tomorrer, but if you all keep on workin' like we've bin doing +lately till you're too hold and wore hout to do any more, you'll be +allowed to go to a nice workhouse for the rest of your lives! and each +one of you will be given a title--"Pauper!"' + +And they laughed! + +Although the majority of them had mothers or fathers or other near +relatives who had already succeeded to the title--they laughed! + +As they were going home, Crass paused at the gate, and pointing up to +the large gable at the end of the house, he said to Philpot: + +'You'll want the longest ladder--the 65, for that, tomorrow.' + +Philpot looked up at the gable. + +It was very high. + + + +Chapter 46 + +The 'Sixty-five' + + +The next morning after breakfast, Philpot, Sawkins, Harlow and +Barrington went to the Yard to get the long ladder--the 65--so called +because it had sixty-five rungs. It was really what is known as a +builder's scaffold ladder, and it had been strengthened by several iron +bolts or rods which passed through just under some of the rungs. One +side of the ladder had an iron band or ribbon twisted and nailed round +it spirally. It was not at all suitable for painters' work, being +altogether too heavy and cumbrous. However, as none of the others were +long enough to reach the high gable at the Refuge, they managed, with a +struggle, to get it down from the hooks and put it on one of the +handcarts and soon passed through the streets of mean and dingy houses +in the vicinity of the yard, and began the ascent of the long hill. + +There had been a lot of rain during the night, and the sky was still +overcast with dark grey clouds. The cart went heavily over the muddy +road; Sawkins was at the helm, holding the end of the ladder and +steering; the others walked a little further ahead, at the sides of the +cart. + +It was such hard work that by the time they were half-way up the hill +they were so exhausted and out of breath that they had to stop for a +rest. + +'This is a bit of all right, ain't it?' remarked Harlow as he took off +his cap and wiped the sweat from his forehead with his handkerchief. + +While they rested they kept a good look out for Rushton or Hunter, who +were likely to pass by at any moment. + +At first, no one made any reply to Harlow's observation, for they were +all out of breath and Philpot's lean fingers trembled violently as he +wiped the perspiration from his face. + +'Yes, mate,' he said despondently, after a while. 'It's one way of +gettin' a livin' and there's plenty better ways.' + +In addition to the fact that his rheumatism was exceptionally bad, he +felt unusually low-spirited this morning; the gloomy weather and the +prospect of a long day of ladder work probably had something to do with +it. + +'A "living" is right,' said Barrington bitterly. He also was exhausted +with the struggle up the hill and enraged by the woebegone appearance +of poor old Philpot, who was panting and quivering from the exertion. + +They relapsed into silence. The unaccountable depression that +possessed Philpot deprived him of all his usual jocularity and filled +him with melancholy thoughts. He had travelled up and down this hill a +great many times before under similar circumstances and he said to +himself that if he had half a quid now for every time he had pushed a +cart up this road, he wouldn't need to do anyone out of a job all the +rest of his life. + +The shop where he had been apprenticed used to be just down at the +bottom; the place had been pulled down years ago, and the ground was +now occupied by more pretentious buildings. Not quite so far down the +road--on the other side--he could see the church where he used to +attend Sunday School when he was a boy, and where he was married just +thirty years ago. Presently--when they reached the top of the hill--he +would be able to look across the valley and see the spire of the other +church, the one in the graveyard, where all those who were dear to him +had been one by one laid to rest. He felt that he would not be sorry +when the time came to join them there. Possibly, in the next world--if +there were such a place--they might all be together once more. + +He was suddenly aroused from these thoughts by an exclamation from +Harlow. + +'Look out! Here comes Rushton.' + +They immediately resumed their journey. Rushton was coming up the hill +in his dog-cart with Grinder sitting by his side. They passed so +closely that Philpot--who was on that side of the cart--was splashed +with mud from the wheels of the trap. + +'Them's some of your chaps, ain't they?' remarked Grinder. + +'Yes,' replied Rushton. 'We're doing a job up this way.' + +'I should 'ave thought it would pay you better to use a 'orse for sich +work as that,' said Grinder. + +'We do use the horses whenever it's necessary for very big loads, you +know,' answered Rushton, and added with a laugh: 'But the donkeys are +quite strong enough for such a job as that.' + +The 'donkeys' struggled on up the hill for about another hundred yards +and then they were forced to halt again. + +'We mustn't stop long, you know,' said Harlow. 'Most likely he's gone +to the job, and he'll wait to see how long it takes us to get there.' + +Barrington felt inclined to say that in that case Rushton would have to +wait, but he remained silent, for he remembered that although he +personally did not care a brass button whether he got the sack or not, +the others were not so fortunately circumstanced. + +While they were resting, another two-legged donkey passed by pushing +another cart--or rather, holding it back, for he was coming slowly down +the hill. Another Heir of all the ages--another Imperialist--a +degraded, brutalized wretch, clad in filthy, stinking rags, his toes +protruding from the rotten broken boots that were tied with bits of +string upon his stockingless feet. The ramshackle cart was loaded with +empty bottles and putrid rags, heaped loosely in the cart and packed +into a large sack. Old coats and trousers, dresses, petticoats, and +under-clothing, greasy, mildewed and malodorous. As he crept along +with his eyes on the ground, the man gave utterance at intervals to +uncouth, inarticulate sounds. + +'That's another way of gettin' a livin',' said Sawkins with a laugh as +the miserable creature slunk past. + +Harlow also laughed, and Barrington regarded them curiously. He +thought it strange that they did not seem to realize that they might +some day become like this man themselves. + +'I've often wondered what they does with all them dirty old rags,' said +Philpot. + +'Made into paper,' replied Harlow, briefly. + +'Some of them are,' said Barrington, 'and some are manufactured into +shoddy cloth and made into Sunday clothes for working men. + +'There's all sorts of different ways of gettin' a livin',' remarked +Sawkins, after a pause. 'I read in a paper the other day about a bloke +wot goes about lookin' for open trap doors and cellar flaps in front of +shops. As soon as he spotted one open, he used to go and fall down in +it; and then he'd be took to the 'orspital, and when he got better he +used to go and threaten to bring a action against the shop-keeper and +get damages, and most of 'em used to part up without goin' in front of +the judge at all. But one day a slop was a watchin' of 'im, and seen +'im chuck 'isself down one, and when they picked 'im up they found he'd +broke his leg. So they took 'im to the 'orspital and when he came out +and went round to the shop and started talkin' about bringin' a action +for damages, the slop collared 'im and they give 'im six months.' + +'Yes, I read about that,' said Harlow, 'and there was another case of a +chap who was run over by a motor, and they tried to make out as 'e put +'isself in the way on purpose; but 'e got some money out of the swell +it belonged to; a 'undered pound I think it was.' + +'I only wish as one of their motors would run inter me,' said Philpot, +making a feeble attempt at a joke. 'I lay I'd get some a' me own back +out of 'em.' + +The others laughed, and Harlow was about to make some reply but at that +moment a cyclist appeared coming down the hill from the direction of +the job. It was Nimrod, so they resumed their journey once more and +presently Hunter shot past on his machine without taking any notice of +them... + +When they arrived they found that Rushton had not been there at all, +but Nimrod had. Crass said that he had kicked up no end of a row +because they had not called at the yard at six o'clock that morning for +the ladder, instead of going for it after breakfast--making two +journeys instead of one, and he had also been ratty because the big +gable had not been started the first thing that morning. + +They carried the ladder into the garden and laid it on the ground along +the side of the house where the gable was. A brick wall about eight +feet high separated the grounds of 'The Refuge' from those of the +premises next door. Between this wall and the side wall of the house +was a space about six feet wide and this space formed a kind of alley +or lane or passage along the side of the house. They laid the ladder +on the ground along this passage, the 'foot' was placed about half-way +through; just under the centre of the gable, and as it lay there, the +other end of the ladder reached right out to the front railings. + +Next, it was necessary that two men should go up into the attic--the +window of which was just under the point of the gable--and drop the end +of a long rope down to the others who would tie it to the top of the +ladder. Then two men would stand on the bottom rung, so as to keep the +'foot' down, and the three others would have to raise the ladder up, +while the two men up in the attic hauled on the rope. + +They called Bundy and his mate Ned Dawson to help, and it was arranged +that Harlow and Crass should stand on the foot because they were the +heaviest. Philpot, Bundy, and Barrington were to 'raise', and Dawson +and Sawkins were to go up to the attic and haul on the rope. + +'Where's the rope?' asked Crass. + +The others looked blankly at him. None of them had thought of bringing +one from the yard. + +'Why, ain't there one 'ere?' asked Philpot. + +'One 'ere? Of course there ain't one 'ere!' snarled Crass. 'Do you +mean to say as you ain't brought one, then?' + +Philpot stammered out something about having thought there was one at +the house already, and the others said they had not thought about it at +all. + +'Well, what the bloody hell are we to do now?' cried Crass, angrily. + +'I'll go to the yard and get one,' suggested Barrington. 'I can do it +in twenty minutes there and back.' + +'Yes! and a bloody fine row there'd be if Hunter was to see you! 'Ere +it's nearly ten o'clock and we ain't made a start on this gable wot we +ought to 'ave started first thing this morning.' + +'Couldn't we tie two or three of those short ropes together?' suggested +Philpot. 'Those that the other two ladders was spliced with?' + +As there was sure to be a row if they delayed long enough to send to +the yard, it was decided to act on Philpot's suggestion. + +Several of the short ropes were accordingly tied together but upon +examination it was found that some parts were so weak that even Crass +had to admit it would be dangerous to attempt to haul the heavy ladder +up with them. + +'Well, the only thing as I can see for it,' he said, 'is that the boy +will 'ave to go down to the yard and get the long rope. It won't do +for anyone else to go: there's been one row already about the waste of +time because we didn't call at the yard for the ladder at six o'clock.' + +Bert was down in the basement of the house limewashing a cellar. Crass +called him up and gave him the necessary instructions, chief of which +was to get back again as soon as ever he could. The boy ran off, and +while they were waiting for him to come back the others went on with +their several jobs. Philpot returned to the small gable he had been +painting before breakfast, which he had not quite finished. As he +worked a sudden and unaccountable terror took possession of him. He did +not want to do that other gable; he felt too ill; and he almost +resolved that he would ask Crass if he would mind letting him do +something else. There were several younger men who would not object to +doing it--it would be mere child's play to them, and Barrington had +already--yesterday--offered to change jobs with him. + +But then, when he thought of what the probable consequences would be, +he hesitated to take that course, and tried to persuade himself that he +would be able to get through with the work all right. He did not want +Crass or Hunter to mark him as being too old for ladder work. + +Bert came back in about half an hour flushed and sweating with the +weight of the rope and with the speed he had made. He delivered it to +Crass and then returned to his cellar and went on with the limewashing, +while Crass passed the word for Philpot and the others to come and +raise the ladder. He handed the rope to Ned Dawson, who took it up to +the attic, accompanied by Sawkins; arrived there they lowered one end +out of the window down to the others. + +'If you ask me,' said Ned Dawson, who was critically examining the +strands of the rope as he passed it out through the open window, 'If +you ask me, I don't see as this is much better than the one we made up +by tyin' the short pieces together. Look 'ere,'--he indicated a part +of the rope that was very frayed and worn--'and 'ere's another place +just as bad.' + +'Well, for Christ's sake don't say nothing about it now,' replied +Sawkins. 'There's been enough talk and waste of time over this job +already.' + +Ned made no answer and the end having by this time reached the ground, +Bundy made it fast to the ladder, about six rungs from the top. + +The ladder was lying on the ground, parallel to the side of the house. +The task of raising it would have been much easier if they had been +able to lay it at right angles to the house wall, but this was +impossible because of the premises next door and the garden wall +between the two houses. On account of its having to be raised in this +manner the men at the top would not be able to get a straight pull on +the rope; they would have to stand back in the room without being able +to see the ladder, and the rope would have to be drawn round the corner +of the window, rasping against the edge of the stone sill and the +brickwork. + +The end of the rope having been made fast to the top of the ladder, +Crass and Harlow stood on the foot and the other three raised the top +from the ground; as Barrington was the tallest, he took the middle +position--underneath the ladder--grasping the rungs, Philpot being on +his left and Bundy on his right, each holding one side of the ladder. + +At a signal from Crass, Dawson and Sawkins began to haul on the rope, +and the top of the ladder began to rise slowly into the air. + +Philpot was not of much use at this work, which made it all the harder +for the other two who were lifting, besides putting an extra strain on +the rope. His lack of strength, and the efforts of Barrington and +Bundy to make up for him caused the ladder to sway from side to side, +as it would not have done if they had all been equally capable. + +Meanwhile, upstairs, Dawson and Sawkins--although the ladder was as yet +only a little more than half the way up--noticed, as they hauled and +strained on the rope, that it had worn a groove for itself in the +corner of the brickwork at the side of the window; and every now and +then, although they pulled with all their strength, they were not able +to draw in any part of the rope at all; and it seemed to them as if +those others down below must have let go their hold altogether, or +ceased lifting. + +That was what actually happened. The three men found the weight so +overpowering, that once or twice they were compelled to relax their +efforts for a few seconds, and at those times the rope had to carry the +whole weight of the ladder; and the part of the rope that had to bear +the greatest strain was the part that chanced to be at the angle of the +brickwork at the side of the window. And presently it happened that +one of the frayed and worn places that Dawson had remarked about was +just at the angle during one of those momentary pauses. On one end +there hung the ponderous ladder, straining the frayed rope against the +corner of the brickwork and the sharp edge of the stone sill, at the +other end were Dawson and Sawkins pulling with all their strength, and +in that instant the rope snapped like a piece of thread. One end +remained in the hands of Sawkins and Dawson, who reeled backwards into +the room, and the other end flew up into the air, writhing like the +lash of a gigantic whip. For a moment the heavy ladder swayed from +side to side: Barrington, standing underneath, with his hands raised +above his head grasping one of the rungs, struggled desperately to hold +it up. At his right stood Bundy, also with arms upraised holding the +side; and on the left, between the ladder and the wall, was Philpot. + +For a brief space they strove fiercely to support the overpowering +weight, but Philpot had no strength, and the ladder, swaying over to +the left, crashed down, crushing him upon the ground and against the +wall of the house. He fell face downwards, with the ladder across his +shoulders; the side that had the iron bands twisted round it fell +across the back of his neck, forcing his face against the bricks at the +base of the wall. He uttered no cry and was quite still, with blood +streaming from the cuts on his face and trickling from his ears. + +Barrington was also hurled to the ground with his head and arms under +the ladder; his head and face were cut and bleeding and he was +unconscious; none of the others was hurt, for they had all had time to +jump clear when the ladder fell. Their shouts soon brought all the +other men running to the spot, and the ladder was quickly lifted off +the two motionless figures. At first it seemed that Philpot was dead, +but Easton rushed off for a neighbouring doctor, who came in a few +minutes. + +He knelt down and carefully examined the crushed and motionless form of +Philpot, while the other men stood by in terrified silence. + +Barrington, who fortunately was but momentarily stunned was sitting +against the wall and had suffered nothing more serious than minor cuts +and bruises. + +The doctor's examination of Philpot was a very brief one, and when he +rose from his knees, even before he spoke they knew from his manner +that their worst fears were realized. + +Philpot was dead. + + + +Chapter 47 + +The Ghouls + + +Barrington did not do any more work that day, but before going home he +went to the doctor's house and the latter dressed the cuts on his head +and arms. Philpot's body was taken away on the ambulance to the +mortuary. + +Hunter arrived at the house shortly afterwards and at once began to +shout and bully because the painting of the gable was not yet +commenced. When he heard of the accident he blamed them for using the +rope, and said they should have asked for a new one. Before he went +away he had a long, private conversation with Crass, who told him that +Philpot had no relatives and that his life was insured for ten pounds +in a society of which Crass was also a member. He knew that Philpot +had arranged that in the event of his death the money was to be paid to +the old woman with whom he lodged, who was a very close friend. The +result of this confidential talk was that Crass and Hunter came to the +conclusion that it was probable that she would be very glad to be +relieved of the trouble of attending to the business of the funeral, +and that Crass, as a close friend of the dead man, and a fellow member +of the society, was the most suitable person to take charge of the +business for her. He was already slightly acquainted with the old +lady, so he would go to see her at once and get her authority to act on +her behalf. Of course, they would not be able to do much until after +the inquest, but they could get the coffin made--as Hunter knew the +mortuary keeper there would be no difficulty about getting in for a +minute to measure the corpse. + +This matter having been arranged, Hunter departed to order a new rope, +and shortly afterwards Crass--having made sure that everyone would have +plenty to do while he was gone--quietly slipped away to go to see +Philpot's landlady. He went off so secretly that the men did not know +that he had been away at all until they saw him come back just before +twelve o'clock. + +The new rope was brought to the house about one o'clock and this time +the ladder was raised without any mishap. Harlow was put on to paint +the gable, and he felt so nervous that he was allowed to have Sawkins +to stand by and hold the ladder all the time. Everyone felt nervous +that afternoon, and they all went about their work in an unusually +careful manner. + +When Bert had finished limewashing the cellar, Crass set him to work +outside, painting the gate of the side entrance. While the boy was +thus occupied he was accosted by a solemn-looking man who asked him +about the accident. The solemn stranger was very sympathetic and +inquired what was the name of the man who had been killed, and whether +he was married. Bert informed him that Philpot was a widower, and that +he had no children. + +'Ah, well, that's so much the better, isn't it?' said the stranger +shaking his head mournfully. 'It's a dreadful thing, you know, when +there's children left unprovided for. You don't happen to know where +he lived, do you?' + +'Yes,' said Bert, mentioning the address and beginning to wonder what +the solemn man wanted to know for, and why he appeared to be so sorry +for Philpot since it was quite evident that he had never known him. + +'Thanks very much,' said the man, pulling out his pocket-book and +making a note of it. 'Thanks very much indeed. Good afternoon,' and +he hurried off. + +'Good afternoon, sir,' said Bert and he turned to resume his work. +Crass came along the garden just as the mysterious stranger was +disappearing round the corner. + +'What did HE want?' said Crass, who had seen the man talking to Bert. + +'I don't know exactly; he was asking about the accident, and whether +Joe left any children, and where he lived. He must be a very decent +sort of chap, I should think. He seems quite sorry about it.' + +'Oh, he does, does he?' said Crass, with a peculiar expression. 'Don't +you know who he is?' + +'No,' replied the boy; 'but I thought p'raps he was a reporter of some +paper. + +''E ain't no reporter: that's old Snatchum the undertaker. 'E's +smellin' round after a job; but 'e's out of it this time, smart as 'e +thinks 'e is.' + +Barrington came back the next morning to work, and at breakfast-time +there was a lot of talk about the accident. They said that it was all +very well for Hunter to talk like that about the rope, but he had known +for a long time that it was nearly worn out. Newman said that only +about three weeks previously when they were raising a ladder at another +job he had shown the rope to him, and Misery had replied that there was +nothing wrong with it. Several others besides Newman claimed to have +mentioned the matter to Hunter, and each of them said he had received +the same sort of reply. But when Barrington suggested that they should +attend the inquest and give evidence to that effect, they all became +suddenly silent and in a conversation Barrington afterwards had with +Newman the latter pointed out that if he were to do so, it would do no +good to Philpot. It would not bring him back but it would be sure to +do himself a lot of harm. He would never get another job at Rushton's +and probably many of the other employers would 'mark him' as well. + +'So if YOU say anything about it,' concluded Newman, 'don't bring my +name into it.' + +Barrington was constrained to admit that all things considered it was +right for Newman to mind his own business. He felt that it would not +be fair to urge him or anyone else to do or say anything that would +injure themselves. + +Misery came to the house about eleven o'clock and informed several of +the hands that as work was very slack they would get their back day at +pay time. He said that the firm had tendered for one or two jobs, so +they could call round about Wednesday and perhaps he might then be able +to give some of them another start, Barrington was not one of those who +were 'stood off', although he had expected to be on account of the +speech he had made at the Beano, and everyone said that he would have +got the push sure enough if it had not been for the accident. + +Before he went away, Nimrod instructed Owen and Crass to go to the yard +at once: they would there find Payne the carpenter, who was making +Philpot's coffin, which would be ready for Crass to varnish by the time +they got there. + +Misery told Owen that he had left the coffin plate and the instructions +with Payne and added that he was not to take too much time over the +writing, because it was a very cheap job. + +When they arrived at the yard, Payne was just finishing the coffin, +which was of elm. All that remained to be done to it was the pitching +of the joints inside and Payne was in the act of lifting the pot of +boiling pitch off the fire to do this. + +As it was such a cheap job, there was no time to polish it properly, so +Crass proceeded to give it a couple of coats of spirit varnish, and +while he was doing this Owen wrote the plate, which was made of very +thin zinc lacquered over to make it look like brass: + + JOSEPH PHILPOT + Died + September 1st 19-- + Aged 56 years. + +The inquest was held on the following Monday morning, and as both +Rushton and Hunter thought it possible that Barrington might attempt to +impute some blame to them, they had worked the oracle and had contrived +to have several friends of their own put on the jury. There was, +however, no need for their alarm, because Barrington could not say that +he had himself noticed, or called Hunter's attention to the state of +the rope; and he did not wish to mention the names of the others +without their permission. The evidence of Crass and the other men who +were called was to the effect that it was a pure accident. None of them +had noticed that the rope was unsound. Hunter also swore that he did +not know of it--none of the men had ever called his attention to it; if +they had done so he would have procured a new one immediately. + +Philpot's landlady and Mr Rushton were also called as witnesses, and +the end was that the jury returned a verdict of accidental death, and +added that they did not think any blame attached to anyone. + +The coroner discharged the jury, and as they and the witnesses passed +out of the room, Hunter followed Rushton outside, with the hope of +being honoured by a little conversation with him on the satisfactory +issue of the case; but Rushton went off without taking any notice of +him, so Hunter returned to the room where the court had been held to +get the coroner's certificate authorizing the interment of the body. +This document is usually handed to the friends of the deceased or to +the undertaker acting for them. When Hunter got back to the room he +found that during his absence the coroner had given it to Philpot's +landlady, who had taken it with her. He accordingly hastened outside +again to ask her for it, but the woman was nowhere to be seen. + +Crass and the other men were also gone; they had hurried off to return +to work, and after a moment's hesitation Hunter decided that it did not +matter much about the certificate. Crass had arranged the business +with the landlady and he could get the paper from her later on. Having +come to this conclusion, he dismissed the subject from his mind: he had +several prices to work out that afternoon--estimates from some jobs the +firm was going to tender for. + +That evening, after having been home to tea, Crass and Sawkins met by +appointment at the carpenter's shop to take the coffin to the mortuary, +where Misery had arranged to meet them at half past eight o'clock. +Hunter's plan was to have the funeral take place from the mortuary, +which was only about a quarter of an hour's walk from the yard; so +tonight they were just going to lift in the body and get the lid +screwed down. + +It was blowing hard and raining heavily when Crass and Sawkins set out, +carrying the coffin--covered with a black cloth--on their shoulders. +They also took a small pair of tressels for the coffin to stand on. +Crass carried one of these slung over his arm and Sawkins the other. + +On their way they had to pass the 'Cricketers' and the place looked so +inviting that they decided to stop and have a drink--just to keep the +damp out, and as they could not very well take the coffin inside with +them, they stood it up against the brick wall a little way from the +side of the door: as Crass remarked with a laugh, there was not much +danger of anyone pinching it. The Old Dear served them and just as +they finished drinking the two half-pints there was a loud crash +outside and Crass and Sawkins rushed out and found that the coffin had +blown down and was lying bottom upwards across the pavement, while the +black cloth that had been wrapped round it was out in the middle of the +muddy road. Having recovered this, they shook as much of the dirt off +as they could, and having wrapped it round the coffin again they +resumed their journey to the mortuary, where they found Hunter waiting +for them, engaged in earnest conversation with the keeper. The +electric light was switched on, and as Crass and Sawkins came in they +saw that the marble slab was empty. + +The corpse was gone. + +'Snatchum came this afternoon with a hand-truck and a corfin,' +explained the keeper. 'I was out at the time, and the missis thought +it was all right so she let him have the key.' + +Hunter and Crass looked blankly at each other. + +'Well, this takes the biskit!' said the latter as soon as he could +speak. + +'I thought you said you had settled everything all right with the old +woman?' said Hunter. + +'So I did,' replied Crass. 'I seen 'er on Friday, and I told 'er to +leave it all to me to attend to, and she said she would. I told 'er +that Philpot said to me that if ever anything 'appened to 'im I was to +take charge of everything for 'er, because I was 'is best friend. And +I told 'er we'd do it as cheap as possible.' + +'Well, it seems to me as you've bungled it somehow,' said Nimrod, +gloomily. 'I ought to have gone and seen 'er myself, I was afraid +you'd make a mess of it,' he added in a wailing tone. 'It's always the +same; everything that I don't attend to myself goes wrong.' + +An uncomfortable silence fell. Crass thought that the principal piece +of bungling in this affair was Hunter's failure to secure possession of +the Coroner's certificate after the inquest, but he was afraid to say +so. + +Outside, the rain was still falling and drove in through the partly +open door, causing the atmosphere of the mortuary to be even more than +usually cold and damp. The empty coffin had been reared against one of +the walls and the marble slab was still stained with blood, for the +keeper had not had time to clean it since the body had been removed. + +'I can see 'ow it's been worked,' said Crass at last. 'There's one of +the members of the club who works for Snatchum, and 'e's took it on +'isself to give the order for the funeral; but 'e's got no right to do +it.' + +'Right or no right, 'e's done it,' replied Misery, 'so you'd better +take the box back to the shop.' + +Crass and Sawkins accordingly returned to the workshop, where they were +presently joined by Nimrod. + +'I've been thinking this business over as I came along,' he said, 'and +I don't see being beat like this by Snatchum; so you two can just put +the tressels and the box on a hand cart and we'll take it over to +Philpot's house.' + +Nimrod walked on the pavement while the other two pushed the cart, and +it was about half past nine, when they arrived at the street in Windley +where Philpot used to live. They halted in a dark part of the street a +few yards away from the house and on the opposite side. + +'I think the best thing we can do,' said Misery, 'is for me and Sawkins +to wait 'ere while you go to the 'ouse and see 'ow the land lies. +You've done all the business with 'er so far. It's no use takin' the +box unless we know the corpse is there; for all we know, Snatchum may +'ave taken it 'ome with 'im.' + +'Yes; I think that'll be the best way,' agreed Crass, after a moment's +thought. + +Nimrod and Sawkins accordingly took shelter in the doorway of an empty +house, leaving the handcart at the kerb, while Crass went across the +street and knocked at Philpot's door. They saw it opened by an elderly +woman holding a lighted candle in her hand; then Crass went inside and +the door was shut. In about a quarter of an hour he reappeared and, +leaving the door partly open behind him, he came out and crossed over +to where the others were waiting. As he drew near they could see that +he carried a piece of paper in his hand. + +'It's all right,' he said in a hoarse whisper as he came up. I've got +the stifficut.' + +Misery took the paper eagerly and scanned it by the light of a match +that Crass struck. It was the certificate right enough, and with a +sigh of relief Hunter put it into his note-book and stowed it safely +away in the inner pocket of his coat, while Crass explained the result +of his errand. + +It appeared that the other member of the Society, accompanied by +Snatchum, had called upon the old woman and had bluffed her into giving +them the order for the funeral. It was they who had put her up to +getting the certificate from the Coroner--they had been careful to keep +away from the inquest themselves so as not to arouse Hunter's or +Crass's suspicions. + +'When they brought the body 'ome this afternoon,' Crass went on, +'Snatchum tried to get the stifficut orf 'er, but she'd been thinkin' +things over and she was a bit frightened 'cos she knowed she'd made +arrangements with me, and she thought she'd better see me first; so she +told 'im she'd give it to 'im on Thursday; that's the day as 'e was +goin' to 'ave the funeral.' + +'He'll find he's a day too late,' said Misery, with a ghastly grin. +'We'll get the job done on Wednesday.' + +'She didn't want to give it to me, at first,' Crass concluded, 'but I +told 'er we'd see 'er right if old Snatchum tried to make 'er pay for +the other coffin.' + +'I don't think he's likely to make much fuss about it,' said Hunter. +'He won't want everybody to know he was so anxious for the job.' + +Crass and Sawkins pushed the handcart over to the other side of the +road and then, lifting the coffin off, they carried it into the house, +Nimrod going first. + +The old woman was waiting for them with the candle at the end of the +passage. + +'I shall be very glad when it's all over,' she said, as she led the way +up the narrow stairs, closely followed by Hunter, who carried the +tressels, Crass and Sawkins, bringing up the rear with the coffin. 'I +shall be very glad when it's all over, for I'm sick and tired of +answerin' the door to undertakers. If there's been one 'ere since +Friday there's been a dozen, all after the job, not to mention all the +cards what's been put under the door, besides the one's what I've had +give to me by different people. I had a pair of boots bein' mended and +the man took the trouble to bring 'em 'ome when they was finished--a +thing 'e's never done before--just for an excuse to give me an +undertaker's card. + +'Then the milkman brought one, and so did the baker, and the +greengrocer give me another when I went in there on Saturday to buy +some vegetables for Sunday dinner.' + +Arrived at the top landing the old woman opened a door and entered a +small and wretchedly furnished room. + +Across the lower sash of the window hung a tattered piece of lace +curtain. The low ceiling was cracked and discoloured. + +There was a rickety little wooden washstand, and along one side of the +room a narrow bed covered with a ragged grey quilt, on which lay a +bundle containing the clothes that the dead man was wearing at the time +of the accident. + +There was a little table in front of the window, with a small +looking-glass upon it, and a cane-seated chair was placed by the +bedside and the floor was covered with a faded piece of drab- +carpet of no perceptible pattern, worn into holes in several places. + +In the middle of this dreary room, upon a pair of tressels, was the +coffin containing Philpot's body. Seen by the dim and flickering light +of the candle, the aspect of this coffin, covered over with a white +sheet, was terrible in its silent, pathetic solitude. + +Hunter placed the pair of tressels he had been carrying against the +wall, and the other two put the empty coffin on the floor by the side +of the bed. The old woman stood the candlestick on the mantelpiece, +and withdrew, remarking that they would not need her assistance. The +three men then removed their overcoats and laid them on the end of the +bed, and from the pocket of his Crass took out two large screwdrivers, +one of which he handed to Hunter. Sawkins held the candle while they +unscrewed and took off the lid of the coffin they had brought with +them: it was not quite empty, for they had brought a bag of tools +inside it. + +'I think we shall be able to work better if we takes the other one orf +the trussels and puts it on the floor,' remarked Crass. + +'Yes, I think so, too,' replied Hunter. + +Crass took off the sheet and threw it on the bed, revealing the other +coffin, which was very similar in appearance to the one they had +brought with them, being of elms, with the usual imitation brass +furniture. Hunter took hold of the head and Crass the foot and they +lifted it off the tressels on to the floor. + +''E's not very 'eavy; that's one good thing,' observed Hunter. + +''E always was a very thin chap,' replied Crass. + +The screws that held down the lid had been covered over with +large-headed brass nails which had to be wrenched off before they could +get at the screws, of which there were eight altogether. It was +evident from the appearance of the beads of these screws that they were +old ones that had been used for some purpose before: they were rusty +and of different sizes, some being rather larger or smaller, than they +should have been. They were screwed in so firmly that by the time they +had drawn half of them out the two men were streaming with +perspiration. After a while Hunter took the candle from Sawkins and +the latter had a try at the screws. + +'Anyone would think the dam' things had been there for a 'undred +years,' remarked Hunter, savagely, as he wiped the sweat from his face +and neck with his handkerchief. + +Kneeling on the lid of the coffin and panting and grunting with the +exertion, the other two continued to struggle with their task. Suddenly +Crass uttered an obscene curse; he had broken off one side of the head +of the screw he was trying to turn and almost at the same instant a +similar misfortune happened to Sawkins. + +After this, Hunter again took a screwdriver himself, and when they got +all the screws out with the exception of the two broken ones, Crass +took a hammer and chisel out of the bag and proceeded to cut off what +was left of the tops of the two that remained. But even after this was +done the two screws still held the lid on the coffin, and so they had +to hammer the end of the blade of the chisel underneath and lever the +lid up so that they could get hold of it with their fingers. It split +up one side as they tore it off, exposing the dead man to view. + +Although the marks of the cuts and bruises were still visible on +Philpot's face, they were softened down by the pallor of death, and a +placid, peaceful expression pervaded his features. His hands were +crossed upon his breast, and as he lay there in the snow-white grave +clothes, almost covered in by the white lace frill that bordered the +sides of the coffin, he looked like one in a profound and tranquil +sleep. + +They laid the broken lid on the bed, and placed the two coffins side by +side on the floor as close together as possible. Sawkins stood at one +side holding the candle in his left hand and ready to render with his +right any assistance that might unexpectedly prove to be necessary. +Crass, standing at the foot, took hold of the body by the ankles, while +Hunter at the other end seized it by the shoulders with his huge, +clawlike hands, which resembled the talons of some obscene bird of +prey, and they dragged it out and placed it in the other coffin. + +Whilst Hunter--hovering ghoulishly over the corpse--arranged the grave +clothes and the frilling, Crass laid the broken cover on the top of the +other coffin and pushed it under the bed out of the way. Then he +selected the necessary screws and nails from the bag, and Hunter having +by this time finished, they proceeded to screw down the lid. Then they +lifted the coffin on to the tressels, covering it over with the sheet, +and the appearance it then presented was so exactly similar to what +they had seen when they first entered the room, that it caused the same +thought to occur to all of them: Suppose Snatchum took it into his head +to come there and take the body out again? If he were to do so and +take it up to the cemetery they might be compelled to give up the +certificate to him and then all their trouble would be lost. + +After a brief consultation, they resolved that it would be safer to +take the corpse on the handcart to the yard and keep it in the +carpenter's shop until the funeral, which could take place from there. +Crass and Sawkins accordingly lifted the coffin off the tressels, +and--while Hunter held the light--proceeded to carry it downstairs, a +task of considerable difficulty owing to the narrowness of the +staircase and the landing. However, they got it down at last and, +having put it on the handcart, covered it over with the black wrapper. +It was still raining and the lamp in the cart was nearly out, so +Sawkins trimmed the wick and relit it before they started. + +Hunter wished them 'Good-night' at the corner of the street, because it +was not necessary for him to accompany them to the yard--they would be +able to manage all that remained to be done by themselves. He said he +would make the arrangements for the funeral as soon as he possibly +could the next morning, and he would come to the job and let them know, +as soon as he knew himself, at what time they would have to be in +attendance to act as bearers. He had gone a little distance on his way +when he stopped and turned back to them. + +'It's not necessary for either of you to make a song about this +business, you know,' he said. + +The two men said that they quite understood that: he could depend on +their keeping their mouths shut. + +When Hunter had gone, Crass drew out his watch. It was a quarter to +eleven. A little way down the road the lights of a public house were +gleaming through the mist. + +'We shall be just in time to get a drink before closing time if we buck +up,' he said. And with this object they hurried on as fast as they +could. + +When they reached the tavern they left the cart standing by the kerb, +and went inside, where Crass ordered two pints of four-ale, which he +permitted Sawkins to pay for. + +'How are we going on about this job?' inquired the latter after they +had each taken a long drink, for they were thirsty after their +exertions. 'I reckon we ought to 'ave more than a bob for it, don't +you? It's not like a ordinary "lift in".' + +'Of course it ain't,' replied Crass. 'We ought to 'ave about, +say'--reflecting--'say arf a dollar each at the very least.' + +'Little enough too,' said Sawkins. 'I was going to say arf a crown, +myself.' + +Crass agreed that even half a crown would not be too much. + +''Ow are we going' on about chargin' it on our time sheets?' asked +Sawkins, after a pause. 'If we just put a "lift in", they might only +pay us a bob as usual.' + +As a rule when they had taken a coffin home, they wrote on their time +sheets, 'One lift in', for which they were usually paid one shilling, +unless it happened to be a very high-class funeral, when they sometimes +got one and sixpence. They were never paid by the hour for these jobs. + +Crass smoked reflectively. + +'I think the best way will be to put it like this,' he said at length. +'"Philpot's funeral. One lift out and one lift in. Also takin' corpse +to carpenter's shop." 'Ow would that do?' + +Sawkins said that would be a very good way to put it, and they finished +their beer just as the landlord intimated that it was closing time. +The cart was standing where they left it, the black cloth saturated +with the rain, which dripped mournfully from its sable folds. + +When they reached the plot of waste ground over which they had to pass +in order to reach the gates of the yard, they had to proceed very +cautiously, for it was very dark, and the lantern did not give much +light. A number of carts and lorries were standing there, and the path +wound through pools of water and heaps of refuse. After much +difficulty and jolting, they reached the gate, which Crass unlocked +with the key he had obtained from the office earlier in the evening. +They soon opened the door of the carpenter's shop and, after lighting +the gas, they arranged the tressels and then brought in the coffin and +placed it upon them. Then they locked the door and placed the key in +its usual hiding-place, but the key of the outer gate they took with +them and dropped into the letter-box at the office, which they had to +pass on their way home. + +As they turned away from the door, they were suddenly confronted by a +policeman who flashed his lantern in their faces and demanded to know +why they had tried the lock... + +The next morning was a very busy one for Hunter, who had to see several +new jobs commenced. They were all small affairs. Most of them would +only take two or three days from start to finish. + +Attending to this work occupied most of his morning, but all the same +he managed to do the necessary business connected with the funeral, +which he arranged to take place at two o'clock on Wednesday afternoon +from the mortuary, where the coffin had been removed during the day, +Hunter deciding that it would not look well to have the funeral start +from the workshop. + +Although Hunter had kept it as quiet as possible, there was a small +crowd, including several old workmates of Philpot's who happened to be +out of work, waiting outside the mortuary to see the funeral start, and +amongst them were Bill Bates and the Semi-drunk, who were both sober. +Barrington and Owen were also there, having left work for the day in +order to go to the funeral. They were there too in a sense as the +representatives of the other workmen, for Barrington carried a large +wreath which had been subscribed for voluntarily by Rushton's men. +They could not all afford to lose the time to attend the funeral, +although most of them would have liked to pay that tribute of regard to +their old mate, so they had done this as the next best thing. Attached +to the wreath was a strip of white satin ribbon, upon which Owen had +painted a suitable inscription. + +Promptly at two o'clock the hearse and the mourning coach drove up with +Hunter and the four bearers--Crass, Slyme, Payne and Sawkins, all +dressed in black with frock coats and silk hats. Although they were +nominally attired in the same way, there was a remarkable dissimilarity +in their appearance. Crass's coat was of smooth, intensely black +cloth, having been recently dyed, and his hat was rather low in the +crown, being of that shape that curved outwards towards the top. +Hunter's coat was a kind of serge with a rather rusty cast of colour +and his hat was very tall and straight, slightly narrower at the crown +than at the brim. As for the others, each of them had a hat of a +different fashion and date, and their 'black' clothes ranged from rusty +brown to dark blue. + +These differences were due to the fact that most of the garments had +been purchased at different times from different second-hand clothes +shops, and never being used except on such occasions as the present, +they lasted for an indefinite time. + +When the coffin was brought out and placed in the hearse, Hunter laid +upon it the wreath that Barrington gave him, together with the another +he had brought himself, which had a similar ribbon with the words: +'From Rushton & Co. With deep sympathy.' + +Seeing that Barrington and Owen were the only occupants of the +carriage, Bill Bates and the Semi-drunk came up to the door and asked +if there was any objection to their coming and as neither Owen nor +Barrington objected, they did not think it necessary to ask anyone +else's permission, so they got in. + +Meanwhile, Hunter had taken his position a few yards in front of the +hearse and the bearers each his proper position, two on each side. As +the procession turned into the main road, they saw Snatchum standing at +the corner looking very gloomy. Hunter kept his eyes fixed straight +ahead and affected not to see him, but Crass could not resist the +temptation to indulge in a jeering smile, which so enraged Snatchum +that he shouted out: + +'It don't matter! I shan't lose much! I can use it for someone else!' + +The distance to the cemetery was about three miles, so as soon as they +got out of the busy streets of the town, Hunter called a halt, and got +up on the hearse beside the driver, Crass sat on the other side, and +two of the other bearers stood in the space behind the driver's seat, +the fourth getting up beside the driver of the coach; and then they +proceeded at a rapid pace. + +As they drew near to the cemetery they slowed down, and finally stopped +when about fifty yards from the gate. Then Hunter and the bearers +resumed their former position, and they passed through the open gate +and up to the door of the church, where they were received by the +clerk--a man in a rusty black cassock, who stood by while they carried +the coffin in and placed it on a kind of elevated table which revolved +on a pivot. They brought it in footfirst, and as soon as they had +placed it upon the table, the clerk swung it round so as to bring the +foot of the coffin towards the door ready to be carried out again. + +There was a special pew set apart for the undertakers, and in this +Hunter and the bearers took their seats to await the arrival of the +clergyman. Barrington and the three others sat on the opposite side. +There was no altar or pulpit in this church, but a kind of reading desk +stood on a slightly raised platform at the other end of the aisle. + +After a wait of about ten minutes, the clergyman entered and, at once +proceeding to the desk, began to recite in a rapid and wholly +unintelligible manner the usual office. If it had not been for the +fact that each of his hearers had a copy of the words--for there was a +little book in each pew--none of them would have been able to gather +the sense of what the man was gabbling. Under any other circumstances, +the spectacle of a human being mouthing in this absurd way would have +compelled laughter, and so would the suggestion that this individual +really believed that he was addressing the Supreme Being. His attitude +and manner were contemptuously indifferent. While he recited, intoned, +or gabbled, the words of the office, he was reading the certificate and +some other paper the clerk had placed upon the desk, and when he had +finished reading these, his gaze wandered abstractedly round the +chapel, resting for a long time with an expression of curiosity upon +Bill Bates and the Semi-drunk, who were doing their best to follow in +their books the words he was repeating. He next turned his attention to +his fingers, holding his hand away from him nearly at arm's length and +critically examining the nails. + +From time to time as this miserable mockery proceeded the clerk in the +rusty black cassock mechanically droned out a sonorous 'Ah-men', and +after the conclusion of the lesson the clergyman went out of the +church, taking a short cut through the grave-stones and monuments, +while the bearers again shouldered the coffin and followed the clerk to +the grave. When they arrived within a few yards of their destination, +they were rejoined by the clergyman, who was waiting for them at the +corner of one of the paths. He put himself at the head of the +procession with an open book in his hand, and as they walked slowly +along, he resumed his reading or repetition of the words of the service. + +He had on an old black cassock and a much soiled and slightly torn +surplice. The unseemly appearance of this dirty garment was heightened +by the circumstance that he had not taken the trouble to adjust it +properly. It hung all lop-sided, showing about six inches more of the +black cassock underneath one side than the other. However, perhaps it +is not right to criticize this person's appearance so severely, because +the poor fellow was paid only seven-and-six for each burial, and as +this was only the fourth funeral he had officiated at that day, +probably he could not afford to wear clean linen--at any rate, not for +the funerals of the lower classes. + +He continued his unintelligible jargon while they were lowering the +coffin into the grave, and those who happened to know the words of the +office by heart were, with some difficulty, able to understand what he +was saying: + +'Forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty God of His great mercy to take +unto Himself the soul of our Dear Brother here departed, we therefore +commit his body to the ground; earth to earth; ashes to ashes, dust to +dust--' + +The earth fell from the clerk's hand and rattled on the lid of the +coffin with a mournful sound, and when the clergyman had finished +repeating the remainder of the service, he turned and walked away in +the direction of the church. Hunter and the rest of the funeral party +made their way back towards the gate of the cemetery where the hearse +and the carriage were waiting. + +On their way they saw another funeral procession coming towards them. +It was a very plain-looking closed hearse with only one horse. There +was no undertaker in front and no bearers walked by the sides. + +It was a pauper's funeral. + +Three men, evidently dressed in their Sunday clothes, followed behind +the hearse. As they reached the church door, four old men who were +dressed in ordinary everyday clothes, came forward and opening the +hearse took out the coffin and carried it into the church, followed by +the other three, who were evidently relatives of the deceased. The +four old men were paupers--inmates of the workhouse, who were paid +sixpence each for acting as bearers. + +They were just taking out the coffin from the hearse as Hunter's party +was passing, and most of the latter paused for a moment and watched +them carry it into the church. The roughly made coffin was of white +deal, not painted or covered in any way, and devoid of any fittings or +ornament with the exception of a square piece of zinc on the lid. None +of Rushton's party was near enough to recognize any of the mourners or +to read what was written on the zinc, but if they had been they would +have seen, roughly painted in black letters + + J.L. + Aged 67 + +and some of them would have recognized the three mourners who were Jack +Linden's sons. + +As for the bearers, they were all retired working men who had come into +their 'titles'. One of them was old Latham, the venetian blind maker. + + + +Chapter 48 + +The Wise men of the East + + +At the end of the following week there was a terrible slaughter at +Rushton's. Barrington and all the casual hands were sacked, including +Newman, Easton and Harlow, and there was so little work that it looked +as if everyone else would have to stand off also. The summer was +practically over, so those who were stood off had but a poor chance of +getting a start anywhere else, because most other firms were +discharging hands as well. + +There was only one other shop in the town that was doing anything at +all to speak of, and that was the firm of Dauber and Botchit. This +firm had come very much to the front during the summer, and had +captured several big jobs that Rushton & Co. had expected to get, +besides taking away several of the latter's old customers. + +This firm took work at almost half the price that Rushton's could do it +for, and they had a foreman whose little finger was thicker than +Nimrod's thigh. Some of the men who had worked for both firms during +the summer, said that after working for Dauber and Botchit, working for +Rushton seemed like having a holiday. + +'There's one bloke there,' said Newman, in conversation with Harlow and +Easton. 'There's one bloke there wot puts up twenty-five rolls o' +paper in a day an' trims and pastes for 'imself; and as for the +painters, nearly everyone of 'em gets over as much work as us three put +together, and if you're working there you've got to do the same or get +the sack.' + +However much truth or falsehood or exaggeration there may have been in +the stories of the sweating and driving that prevailed at Dauber and +Botchit's, it was an indisputable fact that the other builders found it +very difficult to compete with them, and between the lot of them what +work there was to do was all finished or messed up in about a quarter +of the time that it would have taken to do it properly. + +By the end of September there were great numbers of men out of +employment, and the practical persons who controlled the town were +already preparing to enact the usual farce of 'Dealing' with the +distress that was certain to ensue. The Rev. Mr Bosher talked of +reopening the Labour Yard; the secretary of the OBS appealed for more +money and cast-off clothing and boots--the funds of the Society had +been depleted by the payment of his quarter's salary. There were +rumours that the Soup Kitchen would be reopened at an early date for +the sale of 'nourishment', and charitable persons began to talk of +Rummage Sales and soup tickets. + +Now and then, whenever a 'job' 'came in', a few of Rushton's men were +able to put in a few hours' work, but Barrington never went back. His +manner of life was the subject of much speculation on the part of his +former workmates, who were not a little puzzled by the fact that he was +much better dressed than they had ever known him to be before, and that +he was never without money. He generally had a tanner or a bob to +lend, and was always ready to stand a drink, to say nothing of what it +must have cost him for the quantities of Socialist pamphlets and +leaflets that he gave away broadcast. He lodged over at Windley, but +he used to take his meals at a little coffee tavern down town, where he +used often to invite one or two of his old mates to take dinner with +him. It sometimes happened that one of them would invite him home of +an evening, to drink a cup of tea, or to see some curiosity that the +other thought would interest him, and on these occasions--if there were +any children in the house to which they were going--Barrington usually +made a point of going into a shop on their way, and buying a bag of +cakes or fruit for them. + +All sorts of theories were put forward to account for his apparent +affluence. Some said he was a toff in disguise; others that he had +rich relations who were ashamed of him because he was a Socialist, and +who allowed him so much a week so long as he kept away from them and +did not use his real name. Some of the Liberals said that he was in +the pay of the Tories, who were seeking by underhand methods to split +up the Progressive Liberal Party. Just about that time several +burglaries took place in the town, the thieves getting clear away with +the plunder, and this circumstance led to a dark rumour that Barrington +was the culprit, and that it was these ill-gotten gains that he was +spending so freely. + +About the middle of October an event happened that drew the town into a +state of wild excitement, and such comparatively unimportant subjects +as unemployment and starvation were almost forgotten. + +Sir Graball D'Encloseland had been promoted to yet a higher post in the +service of the country that he owned such a large part of; he was not +only to have a higher and more honourable position, but also--as was +nothing but right--a higher salary. His pay was to be increased to +seven thousand five hundred a year or one hundred and fifty pounds per +week, and in consequence of this promotion it was necessary for him to +resign his seat and seek re-election. + +The ragged-trousered Tory workmen as they loitered about the streets, +their stomachs empty, said to each other that it was a great honour for +Mugsborough that their Member should be promoted in this way. They +boasted about it and assumed as much swagger in their gait as their +broken boots permitted. + +They stuck election cards bearing Sir Graball's photograph in their +windows and tied bits of blue and yellow ribbon--Sir Graball's +colours--on their underfed children. + +The Liberals were furious. They said that an election had been sprung +on them--they had been taken a mean advantage of--they had no candidate +ready. + +They had no complaint to make about the salary, all they complained of +was the short notice. It wasn't fair because while they--the leading +Liberals--had been treating the electors with the contemptuous +indifference that is customary, Sir Graball D'Encloseland had been most +active amongst his constituents for months past, cunningly preparing +for the contest. He had really been electioneering for the past six +months! Last winter he had kicked off at quite a number of football +matches besides doing all sorts of things for the local teams. He had +joined the Buffalos and the Druids, been elected President of the Skull +and Crossbones Boys' Society, and, although he was not himself an +abstainer, he was so friendly to Temperance that he had on several +occasions, taken the chair at teetotal meetings, to say nothing of the +teas to the poor school children and things of that sort. In short, he +had been quite an active politician, in the Tory sense of the word, for +months past and the poor Liberals had not smelt a rat until the +election was sprung upon them. + +A hurried meeting of the Liberal Three Hundred was held, and a +deputation sent to London to find a candidate but as there was only a +week before polling day they were unsuccessful in their mission. +Another meeting was held, presided over by Mr Adam Sweater--Rushton and +Didlum also being present. + +Profound dejection was depicted on the countenances of those assembled +slave-drivers as they listened to the delegates' report. The sombre +silence that followed was broken at length by Mr Rushton, who suddenly +started up and said that he began to think they had made a mistake in +going outside the constituency at all to look for a man. It was +strange but true that a prophet never received honour in his own land. +They had been wasting the precious time running about all over the +country, begging and praying for a candidate, and overlooking the fact +that they had in their midst a gentleman--a fellow townsman, who, he +believed, would have a better chance of success than any stranger. +Surely they would all agree--if they could only prevail upon him to +stand--that Adam Sweater would be an ideal Liberal Candidate! + +While Mr Rushton was speaking the drooping spirits of the Three Hundred +were reviving, and at the name of Sweater they all began to clap their +hands and stamp their feet. Loud shouts of enthusiastic approval burst +forth, and cries of 'Good old Sweater' resounded through the room. + +When Sweater rose to reply, the tumult died away as suddenly as it had +commenced. He thanked them for the honour they were conferring upon +him. There was no time to waste in words or idle compliments; rather +than allow the Enemy to have a walk-over, he would accede to their +request and contest the seat. + +A roar of applause burst from the throats of the delighted Three +Hundred. + +Outside the hall in which the meeting was being held a large crowd of +poverty-stricken Liberal working men, many of them wearing broken boots +and other men's cast-off clothing, was waiting to hear the report of +the slave-drivers' deputation, and as soon as Sweater had consented to +be nominated, Didlum rushed and opened the window overlooking the +street and shouted the good news down to the crowd, which joined in the +cheering. In response to their demands for a speech, Sweater brought +his obese carcass to the window and addressed a few words to them, +reminding them of the shortness of the time at their disposal, and +intreating them to work hard in order that the Grand old Flag might be +carried to victory. + +At such times these people forgot all about unemployment and +starvation, and became enthusiastic about 'Grand old Flags'. Their +devotion to this flag was so great that so long as they were able to +carry it to victory, they did not mind being poverty stricken and +hungry and ragged; all that mattered was to score off their hated +'enemies' their fellow countrymen the Tories, and carry the grand old +flag to victory. The fact that they had carried the flag to victory so +often in the past without obtaining any of the spoils, did not seem to +damp their ardour in the least. Being philanthropists, they were +content--after winning the victory--that their masters should always do +the looting. + +At the conclusion of Sweater's remarks the philanthropists gave three +frantic cheers and then someone in the crowd shouted 'What's the +colour?' After a hasty consultation with Rushton, who being a 'master' +decorator, was thought to be an authority on colours--green--grass +green--was decided upon, and the information was shouted down to the +crowd, who cheered again. Then a rush was made to Sweater's Emporium +and several yards of cheap green ribbon were bought, and divided up +into little pieces, which they tied into their buttonholes, and thus +appropriately decorated, formed themselves into military order, four +deep, and marched through all the principal streets, up and down the +Grand Parade, round and round the Fountain, and finally over the hill +to Windley, singing to the tune of 'Tramp, tramp, tramp, the Boys are +marching': + + 'Vote, Vote, Vote for Adam Sweater! + Hang old Closeland on a tree! + Adam Sweater is our man, + And we'll have him if we can, + Then we'll always have the biggest loaf for tea.' + +The spectacle presented by these men--some of them with grey heads and +beards--as they marked time or tramped along singing this childish +twaddle, would have been amusing if it had not been disgusting. + +By way of variety they sang several other things, including: + + 'We'll hang ole Closeland + On a sour apple tree,' + +and + + 'Rally, Rally, men of Windley + For Sweater's sure to win.' + +As they passed the big church in Quality Street, the clock began to +strike. It was one of those that strike four chimes at each quarter of +the hour. It was now ten o'clock so there were sixteen musical chimes: + + Ding, dong! Ding Dong! + Ding dong! Ding dong! + Ding dong! Ding dong! + Ding dong! Ding dong! + +They all chanted A-dam Sweat-er' in time with the striking clock. In +the same way the Tories would chant: + + 'Grab--all Close--land! + Grab--all Close--land! + Grab--all Close--land! + Grab--all Close--land!' + +The town was soon deluged with mendacious literature and smothered with +huge posters: + + 'Vote for Adam Sweater! + The Working-man's Friend!' + 'Vote for Sweater and Temperance Reform.' + 'Vote for Sweater--Free Trade and Cheap Food.' + + or + + 'Vote for D'Encloseland: Tariff Reform and Plenty of Work!' + +This beautiful idea--'Plenty of Work'--appealed strongly to the Tory +workmen. They seemed to regard themselves and their children as a sort +of machines or beasts of burden, created for the purpose of working for +the benefit of other people. They did not think it right that they +should Live, and enjoy the benefits of civilization. All they desired +for themselves and their children was 'Plenty of Work'. + +They marched about the streets singing their Marseillaise, 'Work, Boys, +Work and be contented', to the tune of 'Tramp, tramp, tramp the Boys +are marching', and at intervals as they tramped along, they gave three +cheers for Sir Graball, Tariff Reform, and--Plenty of Work. + +Both sides imported gangs of hired orators who held forth every night +at the corners of the principal streets, and on the open spaces from +portable platforms, and from motor cars and lorries. The Tories said +that the Liberal Party in the House of Commons was composed principally +of scoundrels and fools, the Liberals said that the Tory Party were +fools and scoundrels. A host of richly dressed canvassers descended +upon Windley in carriages and motor cars, and begged for votes from the +poverty-stricken working men who lived there. + +One evening a Liberal demonstration was held at the Cross Roads on +Windley Hill. Notwithstanding the cold weather, there was a great +crowd of shabbily dressed people, many of whom had not had a really +good meal for months. It was a clear night. The moon was at the full, +and the scene was further illuminated by the fitful glare of several +torches, stuck on the end of twelve-foot poles. The platform was a +large lorry, and there were several speakers, including Adam Sweater +himself and a real live Liberal Peer--Lord Ammenegg. This individual +had made a considerable fortune in the grocery and provision line, and +had been elevated to the Peerage by the last Liberal Government on +account of his services to the Party, and in consideration of other +considerations. + +Both Sweater and Ammenegg were to speak at two other meetings that +night and were not expected at Windley until about eight-thirty, so to +keep the ball rolling till they arrived, several other gentlemen, +including Rushton--who presided--and Didlum, and one of the five pounds +a week orators, addressed the meeting. Mingled with the crowd were +about twenty rough-looking men--strangers to the town--who wore huge +green rosettes and loudly applauded the speakers. They also +distributed Sweater literature and cards with lists of the different +meetings that were to be held during the election. These men were +bullies hired by Sweater's agent. They came from the neighbourhood of +Seven Dials in London and were paid ten shillings a day. One of their +duties was to incite the crowd to bash anyone who disturbed the +meetings or tried to put awkward questions to the speakers. + +The hired orator was a tall, slight man with dark hair, beard and +moustache, he might have been called well-looking if it had not been +for a ugly scar upon his forehead, which gave him a rather sinister +appearance. He was an effective speaker; the audience punctuated his +speech with cheers, and when he wound up with an earnest appeal to +them--as working men--to vote for Adam Sweater, their enthusiasm knew +no bounds. + +'I've seen him somewhere before,' remarked Barrington, who was standing +in the crowd with Harlow, Owen and Easton. + +'So have I,' said Owen, with a puzzled expression. 'But for the life +of me, I can't remember where.' + +Harlow and Easton also thought they had seen the man before, but their +speculations were put an end to by the roar of cheering that heralded +the arrival of the motor car, containing Adam Sweater and his friend, +Lord Ammenegg. Unfortunately, those who had arranged the meeting had +forgotten to provide a pair of steps, so Sweater found it a matter of +considerable difficulty to mount the platform. However, while his +friends were hoisting and pushing him up, the meeting beguiled the time +by singing: + + + 'Vote, vote, vote for Adam Sweater.' + +After a terrible struggle they succeeded in getting him on to the cart, +and while he was recovering his wind, Rushton made a few remarks to the +crowd. Sweater then advanced to the front, but in consequence of the +cheering and singing, he was unable to make himself heard for several +minutes. + +When at length he was able to proceed, ho made a very clever speech--it +had been specially written for him and had cost ten guineas. A large +part of it consisted of warnings against the dangers of Socialism. +Sweater had carefully rehearsed this speech and he delivered it very +effectively. Some of those Socialists, he said, were well-meaning but +mistaken people, who did not realize the harm that would result if +their extraordinary ideas were ever put into practice. He lowered his +voice to a blood-curdling stage whisper as he asked: + +'What is this Socialism that we hear so much about, but which so few +understand? What is it, and what does it mean?' + +Then, raising his voice till it rang through the air and fell upon the +ears of the assembled multitude like the clanging of a funeral bell, he +continued: + +'It is madness! Chaos! Anarchy! It means Ruin! Black Ruin for the +rich, and consequently, of course, Blacker Ruin still for the poor!' + +As Sweater paused, a thrill of horror ran through the meeting. Men +wearing broken boots and with patches upon the seats and knees, and +ragged fringes round the bottoms of the legs of their trousers, grew +pale, and glanced apprehensively at each other. If ever Socialism did +come to pass, they evidently thought it very probable that they would +have to walk about in a sort of prehistoric highland costume, without +any trousers or boots at all. + +Toil-worn women, most of them dressed in other women's shabby cast-off +clothing--weary, tired-looking mothers who fed their children for the +most part on adulterated tea, tinned skimmed milk and bread and +margarine, grew furious as they thought of the wicked Socialists who +were trying to bring Ruin upon them. + +It never occurred to any of these poor people that they were in a +condition of Ruin, Black Ruin, already. But if Sweater had suddenly +found himself reduced to the same social condition as the majority of +those he addressed, there is not much doubt that he would have thought +that he was in a condition of Black Ruin. + +The awful silence that had fallen on the panic-stricken crowd, was +presently broken by a ragged-trousered Philanthropist, who shouted out: + +'We knows wot they are, sir. Most of 'em is chaps wot's got tired of +workin' for their livin', so they wants us to keep 'em.' + +Encouraged by numerous expressions of approval from the other +Philanthropists, the man continued: + +'But we ain't such fools as they thinks, and so they'll find out next +Monday. Most of 'em wants 'angin', and I wouldn't mind lendin' a 'and +with the rope myself.' + +Applause and laughter greeted these noble sentiments, and Sweater +resumed his address, when another man--evidently a Socialist--for he +was accompanied by three or four others who like himself wore red +ties--interrupted and said that he would like to ask him a question. +No notice was taken of this request either by Mr Sweater or the +chairman, but a few angry cries of 'Order!' came from the crowd. +Sweater continued, but the man again interrupted and the cries of the +crowd became more threatening. Rushton started up and said that he +could not allow the speaker to be interrupted, but if the gentleman +would wait till the end of the meeting, he would have an opportunity of +asking his question then. + +The man said he would wait as desired; Sweater resumed his oration, and +presently the interrupter and his friends found themselves surrounded +by the gang of hired bullies who wore the big rosettes and who glared +menacingly at them. + +Sweater concluded his speech with an appeal to the crowd to deal a +'Slashing Bow at the Enemy' next Monday, and then amid a storm of +applause, Lord Ammenegg stepped to the front. He said that he did not +intend to inflict a long speech upon them that evening, and as it was +nomination day tomorrow he would not be able to have the honour of +addressing them again during the election; but even if he had wished to +make a long speech, it would be very difficult after the brilliant and +eloquent address they had just listened to from Mr Sweater, for it +seemed to him (Ammenegg) that Adam Sweater had left nothing for anyone +else to say. But he would like to tell them of a Thought that had +occurred to him that evening. They read in the Bible that the Wise Men +came from the East. Windley, as they all knew, was the East end of the +town. They were the men of the East, and he was sure that next Monday +they would prove that they were the Wise Men of the East, by voting for +Adam Sweater and putting him at the top of the poll with a 'Thumping +Majority'. + +The Wise Men of the East greeted Ammenegg's remarks with prolonged, +imbecile cheers, and amid the tumult his Lordship and Sweater got into +the motor car and cleared off without giving the man with the red tie +or anyone else who desired to ask questions any opportunity of doing +so. Rushton and the other leaders got into another motor car, and +followed the first to take part in another meeting down-town, which was +to be addressed by the great Sir Featherstone Blood. + +The crowd now resolved itself into military order, headed by the men +with torches and a large white banner on which was written in huge +black letters, 'Our man is Adam Sweater'. + +They marched down the hill singing, and when they reached the Fountain +on the Grand Parade they saw another crowd holding a meeting there. +These were Tories and they became so infuriated at the sound of the +Liberal songs and by the sight of the banner, that they abandoned their +meeting and charged the processionists. A free fight ensued. Both +sides fought like savages, but as the Liberals were outnumbered by +about three to one, they were driven off the field with great +slaughter; most of the torch poles were taken from them, and the banner +was torn to ribbons. Then the Tories went back to the Fountain +carrying the captured torches, and singing to the tune of 'Has anyone +seen a German Band?' + + 'Has anyone seen a Lib'ral Flag, + Lib'ral Flag, Lib'ral Flag?' + +While the Tories resumed their meeting at the Fountain, the Liberals +rallied in one of the back streets. Messengers were sent in various +directions for reinforcements, and about half an hour afterwards they +emerged from their retreat and swooped down upon the Tory meeting. They +overturned the platform, recaptured their torches, tore the enemy's +banner to tatters and drove them from their position. Then the +Liberals in their turn paraded the streets singing 'Has anyone seen a +Tory Flag?' and proceeded to the hall where Sir Featherstone was +speaking, arriving as the audience left. + +The crowd that came pouring out of the hall was worked up to a frenzy +of enthusiasm, for the speech they had just listened to had been a sort +of manifesto to the country. + +In response to the cheering of the processionists--who, of course, had +not heard the speech, but were cheering from force of habit--Sir +Featherstone Blood stood up in the carriage and addressed the crowd, +briefly outlining the great measures of Social Reform that his party +proposed to enact to improve the condition of the working classes; and +as they listened, the Wise Men grew delirious with enthusiasm. He +referred to Land Taxes and Death Duties which would provide money to +build battleships to protect the property of the rich, and provide Work +for the poor. Another tax was to provide a nice, smooth road for the +rich to ride upon in motor cars--and to provide Work for the poor. +Another tax would be used for Development, which would also make Work +for the poor. And so on. A great point was made of the fact that the +rich were actually to be made to pay something towards the cost of +their road themselves! But nothing was said about how they would get +the money to do it. No reference was made to how the workers would be +sweated and driven and starved to earn Dividends and Rent and Interest +and Profits to put into the pockets of the rich before the latter would +be able to pay for anything at all. + +These are the things, Gentlemen, that we propose to do for you, and, at +the rate of progress which we propose to adopt, I say without fear or +contradiction, that within the next Five Hundred years we shall so +reform social conditions in this country, that the working classes will +be able to enjoy some of the benefits of civilization. + +'The only question before you is: Are you willing to wait for Five +Hundred Years?' + +'Yes, sir,' shouted the Wise Men with enthusiasm at the glorious +prospect. + +'Yes, Sir: we'll wait a thousand years if you like, Sir!' + +'I've been waiting all my life,' said one poor old veteran, who had +assisted to 'carry the "Old Flag" to victory' times out of number in +the past and who for his share of the spoils of those victories was now +in a condition of abject, miserable poverty, with the portals of the +workhouse yawning open to receive him; 'I've waited all my life, hoping +and trusting for better conditions so a few more years won't make much +difference to me.' + +'Don't you trouble to 'urry yourself, Sir,' shouted another Solomon in +the crowd. 'We don't mind waiting. Take your own time, Sir. You know +better than the likes of us 'ow long it ought to take.' + +In conclusion, the great man warned them against being led away by the +Socialists, those foolish, unreasonable, impractical people who wanted +to see an immediate improvement in their condition; and he reminded +them that Rome was not built in a day. + +The Wise Men applauded lustily. It did not appear to occur to any of +them that the rate at which the ancient Roman conducted their building +operations had nothing whatever to do with the case. + +Sir Featherstone Blood sat down amid a wild storm of cheering, and then +the procession reformed, and, reinforced by the audience from the hall, +they proceeded to march about the dreary streets, singing, to the tune +of the 'Men of Harlech': + + 'Vote for Sweater, Vote for Sweater! + Vote for Sweater, VOTE FOR SWEATER! + 'He's the Man, who has a plan, + To liberate and reinstate the workers! + 'Men of Mugs'bro', show your mettle, + Let them see that you're in fettle! + Once for all this question settle + Sweater shall Prevail!' + +The carriage containing Sir Featherstone, Adam Sweater, and Rushton and +Didlum was in the middle of the procession. The banner and the torches +were at the head, and the grandeur of the scene was heightened by four +men who walked--two on each side of the carriage, burning green fire in +frying pans. As they passed by the Slave Market, a poor, shabbily +dressed wretch whose boots were so worn and rotten that they were +almost falling off his feet, climbed up a lamp-post, and taking off his +cap waved it in the air and shrieked out: 'Three Cheers for Sir +Featherstone Blood, our future Prime Minister!' + +The Philanthropists cheered themselves hoarse and finally took the +horses out of the traces and harnessed themselves to the carriage +instead. + +''Ow much wages will Sir Featherstone get if 'e is made Prime +Minister?' asked Harlow of another Philanthropist who was also pushing +up behind the carriage. + +'Five thousand a year,' replied the other, who by some strange chance +happened to know. 'That comes to a 'underd pounds a week.' + +'Little enough, too, for a man like 'im,' said Harlow. + +'You're right, mate,' said the other, with deep sympathy in his voice. +'Last time 'e 'eld office 'e was only in for five years, so 'e only +made twenty-five thousand pounds out of it. Of course 'e got a pension +as well--two thousand a year for life, I think it is; but after all, +what's that--for a man like 'im?' + +'Nothing,' replied Harlow, in a tone of commiseration, and Newman, who +was also there, helping to drag the carriage, said that it ought to be +at least double that amount. + +However, they found some consolation in knowing that Sir Featherstone +would not have to wait till he was seventy before he obtained his +pension; he would get it directly he came out of office. + + + +The following evening Barrington, Owen and a few others of the same way +of thinking, who had subscribed enough money between them to purchase a +lot of Socialist leaflets, employed themselves distributing them to the +crowds at the Liberal and Tory meetings, and whilst they were doing +this they frequently became involved in arguments with the supporters +of the capitalist system. In their attempts to persuade others to +refrain from voting for either of the candidates, they were opposed +even by some who professed to believe in Socialism, who said that as +there was no better Socialist candidate the thing to do was to vote for +the better of the two. This was the view of Harlow and Easton, whom +they met. Harlow had a green ribbon in his buttonhole, but Easton wore +D'Encloseland's colours. + +One man said that if he had his way, all those who had votes should be +compelled to record them--whether they liked it or not--or be +disenfranchised! Barrington asked him if he believed in Tarrif Reform. +The man said no. + +'Why not?' demanded Barrington. + +The other replied that he opposed Tariff Reform because he believed it +would ruin the country. Barrington inquired if he were a supporter of +Socialism. The man said he was not, and when further questioned he +said that he believed if it were ever adopted it would bring black ruin +upon the country--he believed this because Mr Sweater had said so. When +Barrington asked him--supposing there were only two candidates, one a +Socialist and the other a Tariff Reformer--how would he like to be +compelled to vote for one of them, he was at a loss for an answer. + +During the next few days the contest continued. The hired orators +continued to pour forth their streams of eloquence; and tons of +literature flooded the town. The walls were covered with huge posters: +'Another Liberal Lie.' 'Another Tory Fraud.' + +Unconsciously each of these two parties put in some splendid work for +Socialism, in so much that each of them thoroughly exposed the +hypocrisy of the other. If the people had only had the sense, they +might have seen that the quarrel between the Liberal and Tory leaders +was merely a quarrel between thieves over the spoil; but unfortunately +most of the people had not the sense to perceive this. They were +blinded by bigoted devotion to their parties, and--inflamed with +maniacal enthusiasm--thought of nothing but 'carrying their flags to +victory'. + +At considerable danger to themselves, Barrington, Owen and the other +Socialists continued to distribute their leaflets and to heckle the +Liberal and Tory speakers. They asked the Tories to explain the +prevalence of unemployment and poverty in protected countries, like +Germany and America, and at Sweater's meetings they requested to be +informed what was the Liberal remedy for unemployment. From both +parties the Socialists obtained the same kinds of answer--threats of +violence and requests 'not to disturb the meeting'. + +These Socialists held quite a lot of informal meetings on their own. +Every now and then when they were giving their leaflets away, some +unwary supporter of the capitalist system would start an argument, and +soon a crowd would gather round and listen. + +Sometimes the Socialists succeeded in arguing their opponents to an +absolute standstill, for the Liberals and Tones found it impossible to +deny that machinery is the cause of the overcrowded state of the labour +market; that the overcrowded labour market is the cause of +unemployment; that the fact of there being always an army of unemployed +waiting to take other men's jobs away from them destroys the +independence of those who are in employment and keeps them in +subjection to their masters. They found it impossible to deny that +this machinery is being used, not for the benefit of all, but to make +fortunes for a few. In short, they were unable to disprove that the +monopoly of the land and machinery by a comparatively few persons, is +the cause of the poverty of the majority. But when these arguments +that they were unable to answer were put before them and when it was +pointed out that the only possible remedy was the Public Ownership and +Management of the Means of production, they remained angrily silent, +having no alternative plan to suggest. + +At other times the meeting resolved itself into a number of quarrelsome +disputes between the Liberals and Tories that formed the crowd, which +split itself up into a lot of little groups and whatever the original +subject might have been they soon drifted to a hundred other things, +for most of the supporters of the present system seemed incapable of +pursuing any one subject to its logical conclusion. A discussion would +be started about something or other; presently an unimportant side +issue would crop up, then the original subject would be left +unfinished, and they would argue and shout about the side issue. In a +little while another side issue would arise, and then the first side +issue would be abandoned also unfinished, and an angry wrangle about +the second issue would ensue, the original subject being altogether +forgotten. + +They did not seem to really desire to discover the truth or to find out +the best way to bring about an improvement in their condition, their +only object seemed to be to score off their opponents. + +Usually after one of these arguments, Owen would wander off by himself, +with his head throbbing and a feeling of unutterable depression and +misery at his heart; weighed down by a growing conviction of the +hopelessness of everything, of the folly of expecting that his fellow +workmen would ever be willing to try to understand for themselves the +causes that produced their sufferings. It was not that those causes +were so obscure that it required exceptional intelligence to perceive +them; the causes of all the misery were so apparent that a little child +could easily be made to understand both the disease and the remedy; but +it seemed to him that the majority of his fellow workmen had become so +convinced of their own intellectual inferiority that they did not dare +to rely on their own intelligence to guide them, preferring to resign +the management of their affairs unreservedly into the hands of those +who battened upon and robbed them. They did not know the causes of the +poverty that perpetually held them and their children in its cruel +grip, and--they did not want to know! And if one explained those +causes to them in such language and in such a manner that they were +almost compelled to understand, and afterwards pointed out to them the +obvious remedy, they were neither glad nor responsive, but remained +silent and were angry because they found themselves unable to answer +and disprove. + +They remained silent; afraid to trust their own intelligence, and the +reason of this attitude was that they had to choose between the +evidence and their own intelligence, and the stories told them by their +masters and exploiters. And when it came to making this choice they +deemed it safer to follow their old guides, than to rely on their own +judgement, because from their very infancy they had had drilled into +them the doctrine of their own mental and social inferiority, and their +conviction of the truth of this doctrine was voiced in the degraded +expression that fell so frequently from their lips, when speaking of +themselves and each other--'The Likes of Us!' + +They did not know the causes of their poverty, they did not want to +know, they did not want to hear. + +All they desired was to be left alone so that they might continue to +worship and follow those who took advantage of their simplicity, and +robbed them of the fruits of their toil; their old leaders, the fools +or scoundrels who fed them with words, who had led them into the +desolation where they now seemed to be content to grind out treasure +for their masters, and to starve when those masters did not find it +profitable to employ them. It was as if a flock of foolish sheep +placed themselves under the protection of a pack of ravening wolves. + +Several times the small band of Socialists narrowly escaped being +mobbed, but they succeeded in disposing of most of their leaflets +without any serious trouble. Towards the latter part of one evening +Barrington and Owen became separated from the others, and shortly +afterwards these two lost each other in the crush. + +About nine o'clock, Barrington was in a large Liberal crowd, listening +to the same hired orator who had spoken a few evenings before on the +hill--the man with the scar on his forehead. The crowd was applauding +him loudly and Barrington again fell to wondering where he had seen +this man before. As on the previous occasion, this speaker made no +reference to Socialism, confining himself to other matters. Barrington +examined him closely, trying to recall under what circumstances they +had met previously, and presently he remembered that this was one of +the Socialists who had come with the band of cyclists into the town +that Sunday morning, away back at the beginning of the summer, the man +who had come afterwards with the van, and who had been struck down by a +stone while attempting to speak from the platform of the van, the man +who had been nearly killed by the upholders of the capitalist system. +It was the same man! The Socialist had been clean-shaven--this man +wore beard and moustache--but Barrington was certain he was the same. + +When the man had concluded his speech he got down and stood in the +shade behind the platform, while someone else addressed the meeting, +and Barrington went round to where he was standing, intending to speak +to him. + +All around them, pandemonium reigned supreme. They were in the +vicinity of the Slave Market, near the Fountain, on the Grand Parade, +where several roads met; there was a meeting going on at every corner, +and a number of others in different parts of the roadway and on the +pavement of the Parade. Some of these meetings were being carried on by +two or three men, who spoke in turn from small, portable platforms they +carried with them, and placed wherever they thought there was a chance +of getting an audience. + +Every now and then some of these poor wretches--they were all paid +speakers--were surrounded and savagely mauled and beaten by a hostile +crowd. If they were Tariff Reformers the Liberals mobbed them, and +vice versa. Lines of rowdies swaggered to and fro, arm in arm, +singing, 'Vote, Vote, Vote, for good ole Closeland' or 'good ole +Sweater', according as they were green or blue and yellow. Gangs of +hooligans paraded up and down, armed with sticks, singing, howling, +cursing and looking for someone to hit. Others stood in groups on the +pavement with their hands thrust in their pockets, or leaned against +walls or the shutters of the shops with expressions of ecstatic +imbecility on their faces, chanting the mournful dirge to the tune of +the church chimes, + + 'Good--ole--Sweat--er + Good--ole--Sweat--er + Good--ole--Sweat--er + Good--ole--Sweat--er.' + +Other groups--to the same tune--sang 'Good--ole--Close--land'; and +every now and again they used to leave off singing and begin to beat +each other. Fights used to take place, often between workmen, about +the respective merits of Adam Sweater and Sir Graball D'Encloseland. + +The walls were covered with huge Liberal and Tory posters, which showed +in every line the contempt of those who published them for the +intelligence of the working men to whom they were addressed. There was +one Tory poster that represented the interior of a public house; in +front of the bar, with a quart pot in his hand, a clay pipe in his +mouth, and a load of tools on his back, stood a degraded-looking brute +who represented the Tory ideal of what an Englishman should be; the +letterpress on the poster said it was a man! This is the ideal of +manhood that they hold up to the majority of their fellow countrymen, +but privately--amongst themselves--the Tory aristocrats regard such +'men' with far less respect than they do the lower animals. Horses or +dogs, for instance. + +The Liberal posters were not quite so offensive. They were more +cunning, more specious, more hypocritical and consequently more +calculated to mislead and deceive the more intelligent of the voters. + +When Barrington got round to the back of the platform, he found the man +with the scarred face standing alone and gloomily silent in the shadow. +Barrington gave him one of the Socialist leaflets, which he took, and +after glancing at it, put it in his coat pocket without making any +remark. + +'I hope you'll excuse me for asking, but were you not formerly a +Socialist?' said Barrington. + +Even in the semi-darkness Barrington saw the other man flush deeply and +then become very pale, and the unsightly scar upon his forehead showed +with ghastly distinctiveness. + +'I am still a Socialist: no man who has once been a Socialist can ever +cease to be one.' + +'You seem to have accomplished that impossibility, to judge by the work +you are at present engaged in. You must have changed your opinions +since you were here last.' + +'No one who has been a Socialist can ever cease to be one. It is +impossible for a man who has once acquired knowledge ever to relinquish +it. A Socialist is one who understands the causes of the misery and +degradation we see all around us; who knows the only remedy, and knows +that that remedy--the state of society that will be called +Socialism--must eventually be adopted; is the only alternative to the +extermination of the majority of the working people; but it does not +follow that everyone who has sense enough to acquire that amount of +knowledge, must, in addition, be willing to sacrifice himself in order +to help to bring that state of society into being. When I first +acquired that knowledge,' he continued, bitterly, 'I was eager to tell +the good news to others. I sacrificed my time, my money, and my health +in order that I might teach others what I had learned myself. I did it +willingly and happily, because I thought they would be glad to hear, +and that they were worth the sacrifices I made for their sakes. But I +know better now.' + +'Even if you no longer believe in working for Socialism, there's no +need to work AGAINST it. If you are not disposed to sacrifice yourself +in order to do good to others, you might at least refrain from doing +evil. If you don't want to help to bring about a better state of +affairs, there's no reason why you should help to perpetuate the +present system.' + +The other man laughed bitterly. 'Oh yes, there is, and a very good +reason too.' + +'I don't think you could show me a reason,' said Barrington. + +The man with the scar laughed again, the same unpleasant, mirthless +laugh, and thrusting his hand into his trouser pocket drew it out again +full of silver coins, amongst which one or two gold pieces glittered. + +'That is my reason. When I devoted my life and what abilities I +possess to the service of my fellow workmen; when I sought to teach +them how to break their chains; when I tried to show them how they +might save their children from poverty and shameful servitude, I did +not want them to give me money. I did it for love. And they paid me +with hatred and injury. But since I have been helping their masters to +rob them, they have treated me with respect.' + +Barrington made no reply and the other man, having returned the money +to his pocket, indicated the crowd with a sweep of his hand. + +'Look at them!' he continued with a contemptuous laugh. 'Look at them! +the people you are trying to make idealists of! Look at them! Some of +them howling and roaring like wild beasts, or laughing like idiots, +others standing with dull and stupid faces devoid of any trace of +intelligence or expression, listening to the speakers whose words +convey no meaning to their stultified minds, and others with their eyes +gleaming with savage hatred of their fellow men, watching eagerly for +an opportunity to provoke a quarrel that they may gratify their brutal +natures by striking someone--their eyes are hungry for the sight of +blood! Can't you see that these people, whom you are trying to make +understand your plan for the regeneration of the world, your doctrine +of universal brotherhood and love are for the most +part--intellectually--on a level with Hottentots? The only things they +feel any real interest in are beer, football, betting and--of +course--one other subject. Their highest ambition is to be allowed to +Work. And they desire nothing better for their children! + +'They have never had an independent thought in their lives. These are +the people whom you hope to inspire with lofty ideals! You might just +as well try to make a gold brooch out of a lump of dung! Try to reason +with them, to uplift them, to teach them the way to higher things. +Devote your whole life and intelligence to the work of trying to get +better conditions for them, and you will find that they themselves are +the enemy you will have to fight against. They'll hate you, and, if +they get the chance, they'll tear you to pieces. But if you're a +sensible man you'll use whatever talents and intelligence you possess +for your own benefit. Don't think about Socialism or any other "ism". +Concentrate your mind on getting money--it doesn't matter how you get +it, but--get it. If you can't get it honestly, get it dishonestly, but +get it! it is the only thing that counts. Do as I do--rob them! +exploit them! and then they'll have some respect for you.' + +'There's something in what you say,' replied Barrington, after a long +pause, 'but it's not all. Circumstances make us what we are; and +anyhow, the children are worth fighting for.' + +'You may think so now,' said the other, 'but you'll come to see it my +way some day. As for the children--if their parents are satisfied to +let them grow up to be half-starved drudges for other people, I don't +see why you or I need trouble about it. If you like to listen to +reason,' he continued after a pause, 'I can put you on to something +that will be worth more to you than all your Socialism.' + +'What do you mean?' + +'Look here: you're a Socialist; well, I'm a Socialist too: that is, I +have sense enough to believe that Socialism is practical and inevitable +and right; it will come when the majority of the people are +sufficiently enlightened to demand it, but that enlightenment will +never be brought about by reasoning or arguing with them, for these +people are simply not intellectually capable of abstract +reasoning--they can't grasp theories. You know what the late Lord +Salisbury said about them when somebody proposed to give them some free +libraries: He said: "They don't want libraries: give them a circus." +You see these Liberals and Tories understand the sort of people they +have to deal with; they know that although their bodies are the bodies +of grown men, their minds are the minds of little children. That is +why it has been possible to deceive and bluff and rob them for so long. +But your party persists in regarding them as rational beings, and +that's where you make a mistake--you're simply wasting your time. + +'The only way in which it is possible to teach these people is by means +of object lessons, and those are being placed before them in increasing +numbers every day. The trustification of industry--the object lesson +which demonstrates the possibility of collective ownership--will in +time compel even these to understand, and by the time they have learnt +that, they will also have learned by bitter experience and not from +theoretical teaching, that they must either own the trusts or perish, +and then, and not, till then, they will achieve Socialism. But +meanwhile we have this election. Do you think it will make any real +difference--for good or evil--which of these two men is elected?' + +'No.' + +'Well, you can't keep them both out--you have no candidate of your +own--why should you object to earning a few pounds by helping one of +them to get in? There are plenty of voters who are doubtful what to +do; as you and I know there is every excuse for them being unable to +make up their minds which of these two candidates is the worse, a word +from your party would decide them. Since you have no candidate of your +own you will be doing no harm to Socialism and you will be doing +yourself a bit of good. If you like to come along with me now, I'll +introduce you to Sweater's agent--no one need know anything about it.' + +He slipped his arm through Barrington's, but the latter released +himself. + +'Please yourself,' said the other with an affectation of indifference. +'You know your own business best. You may choose to be a Jesus Christ +if you like, but for my part I'm finished. For the future I intend to +look after myself. As for these people--they vote for what they want; +they get--what they vote for; and by God, they deserve nothing better! +They are being beaten with whips of their own choosing and if I had my +way they should be chastised with scorpions! For them, the present +system means joyless drudgery, semi-starvation, rags and premature +death. They vote for it all and uphold it. Well, let them have what +they vote for--let them drudge--let them starve!' + +The man with the scarred face ceased speaking, and for some moments +Barrington did not reply. + +'I suppose there is some excuse for your feeling as you do,' he said +slowly at last, 'but it seems to me that you do not make enough +allowance for the circumstances. From their infancy most of them have +been taught by priests and parents to regard themselves and their own +class with contempt--a sort of lower animals--and to regard those who +possess wealth with veneration, as superior beings. The idea that they +are really human creatures, naturally absolutely the same as their +so-called betters, naturally equal in every way, naturally different +from them only in those ways in which their so-called superiors differ +from each other, and inferior to them only because they have been +deprived of education, culture and opportunity--you know as well as I +do that they have all been taught to regard that idea as preposterous. + +'The self-styled "Christian" priests who say--with their tongues in +their cheeks--that God is our Father and that all men are brethren, +have succeeded in convincing the majority of the "brethren" that it is +their duty to be content in their degradation, and to order themselves +lowly and reverently towards their masters. Your resentment should be +directed against the deceivers, not against the dupes.' + +The other man laughed bitterly. + +'Well, go and try to undeceive them,' he said, as he returned to the +platform in response to a call from his associates. 'Go and try to +teach them that the Supreme Being made the earth and all its fullness +for the use and benefit of all His children. Go and try to explain to +them that they are poor in body and mind and social condition, not +because of any natural inferiority, but because they have been robbed +of their inheritance. Go and try to show them how to secure that +inheritance for themselves and their children--and see how grateful +they'll be to you.' + +For the next hour Barrington walked about the crowded streets in a +dispirited fashion. His conversation with the renegade seemed to have +taken all the heart out of him. He still had a number of the leaflets, +but the task of distributing them had suddenly grown distasteful and +after a while he discontinued it. All his enthusiasm was gone. Like +one awakened from a dream he saw the people who surrounded him in a +different light. For the first time he properly appreciated the +offensiveness of most of those to whom he offered the handbills; some, +without even troubling to ascertain what they were about, rudely +refused to accept them; some took them and after glancing at the +printing, crushed them in their hands and ostentatiously threw them +away. Others, who recognized him as a Socialist, angrily or +contemptuously declined them, often with curses or injurious words. + +His attention was presently attracted to a crowd of about thirty or +forty people, congregated near a gas lamp at the roadside. The sound +of many angry voices rose from the centre of this group, and as he +stood on the outskirts of the crowd, Barrington, being tall, was able +to look into the centre, where he saw Owen. The light of the street +lamp fell full upon the latter's pale face, as he stood silent in the +midst of a ring of infuriated men, who were all howling at him at once, +and whose malignant faces bore expressions of savage hatred, as they +shouted out the foolish accusations and slanders they had read in the +Liberal and Tory papers. + +Socialists wished to do away with religion and morality! to establish +free love and atheism! All the money that the working classes had +saved up in the Post Office and the Friendly Societies, was to be +Robbed from them and divided up amongst a lot of drunken loafers who +were too lazy to work. The King and all the Royal Family were to be +Done Away with! and so on. + +Owen made no attempt to reply, and the manner of the crowd became every +moment more threatening. It was evident that several of them found it +difficult to refrain from attacking him. It was a splendid opportunity +of doing a little fighting without running any risks. This fellow was +all by himself, and did not appear to be much of a man even at that. +Those in the middle were encouraged by shouts from others in the crowd, +who urged them to 'Go for him' and at last--almost at the instant of +Barrington's arrival--one of the heroes, unable to contain himself any +longer, lifted a heavy stick and struck Owen savagely across the face. +The sight of the blood maddened the others, and in an instant everyone +who could get within striking distance joined furiously in the +onslaught, reaching eagerly over each other's shoulders, showering +blows upon him with sticks and fists, and before Barrington could reach +his side, they had Owen down on the ground, and had begun to use their +boots upon him. + +Barrington felt like a wild beast himself, as he fiercely fought his +way through the crowd, spurning them to right and left with fists and +elbows. He reached the centre in time to seize the uplifted arm of the +man who had led the attack and wrenching the stick from his hand, he +felled him to the ground with a single blow. The remainder shrank +back, and meantime the crowd was augmented by others who came running +up. + +Some of these newcomers were Liberals and some Tories, and as these did +not know what the row was about they attacked each other. The Liberals +went for those who wore Tory colours and vice versa, and in a few +seconds there was a general free fight, though most of the original +crowd ran away, and in the confusion that ended, Barrington and Owen +got out of the crowd without further molestation. + +Monday was the last day of the election--polling day--and in +consequence of the number of motor cars that were flying about, the +streets were hardly safe for ordinary traffic. The wealthy persons who +owned these carriages... + +The result of the poll was to be shown on an illuminated sign at the +Town Hall, at eleven o'clock that night, and long before that hour a +vast crowd gathered in the adjacent streets. About ten o'clock it +began to rain, but the crowd stood its ground and increased in numbers +as the time went by. At a quarter to eleven the rain increased to a +terrible downpour, but the people remained waiting to know which hero +had conquered. Eleven o'clock came and an intense silence fell upon +the crowd, whose eyes were fixed eagerly upon the window where the sign +was to be exhibited. To judge by the extraordinary interest displayed +by these people, one might have thought that they expected to reap some +great benefit or to sustain some great loss from the result, but of +course that was not the case, for most of them knew perfectly well that +the result of this election would make no more real difference to them +than all the other elections that had gone before. + +They wondered what the figures would be. There were ten thousand +voters on the register. At a quarter past eleven the sign was +illuminated, but the figures were not yet shown. Next, the names of +the two candidates were slid into sight, the figures were still +missing, but D'Encloseland's name was on top, and a hoarse roar of +triumph came from the throats of his admirers. Then the two slides +with the names were withdrawn, and the sign was again left blank. After +a time the people began to murmur at all this delay and messing about, +and presently some of them began to groan and hoot. + +After a few minutes the names were again slid into view, this time with +Sweater's name on top, and the figures appeared immediately afterwards: + + Sweater . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4,221 + D'Encloseland . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4,200 + +It was several seconds before the Liberals could believe their eyes; it +was too good to be true. It is impossible to say what was the reason +of the wild outburst of delighted enthusiasm that followed, but +whatever the reason, whatever the benefit was that they expected to +reap--there was the fact. They were all cheering and dancing and +shaking hands with each other, and some of them were so overcome with +inexplicable joy that they were scarcely able to speak. It was +altogether extraordinary and unaccountable. + +A few minutes after the declaration, Sweater appeared at the window and +made a sort of a speech, but only fragments of it were audible to the +cheering crowd who at intervals caught such phrases as 'Slashing Blow', +'Sweep the Country', 'Grand Old Liberal Flag', and so on. Next +D'Encloseland appeared and he was seen to shake hands with Mr Sweater, +whom he referred to as 'My friend'. + +When the two 'friends' disappeared from the window, the part of the +Liberal crowd that was not engaged in hand-to-hand fights with their +enemies--the Tories--made a rush to the front entrance of the Town +Hall, where Sweater's carriage was waiting, and as soon as he had +placed his plump rotundity inside, they took the horses out and amid +frantic cheers harnessed themselves to it instead and dragged it +through the mud and the pouring rain all the way to 'The Cave'--most of +them were accustomed to acting as beasts of burden--where he again +addressed a few words to them from the porch. + +Afterwards as they walked home saturated with rain and covered from +head to foot with mud, they said it was a great victory for the cause +of progress! + +Truly the wolves have an easy prey. + + + +Chapter 49 + +The Undesired + + +That evening about seven o'clock, whilst Easton was down-town seeing +the last of the election, Ruth's child was born. + +After the doctor was gone, Mary Linden stayed with her during the hours +that elapsed before Easton came home, and downstairs Elsie and +Charley--who were allowed to stay up late to help their mother because +Mrs Easton was ill--crept about very quietly, and conversed in hushed +tones as they washed up the tea things and swept the floor and tidied +the kitchen. + +Easton did not return until after midnight, and all through the +intervening hours, Ruth, weak and tired, but unable to sleep, was lying +in bed with the child by her side. Her wide-open eyes appeared +unnaturally large and brilliant, in contrast with the almost death-like +paleness of her face, and there was a look of fear in them, as she +waited and listened for the sound of Easton's footsteps. + +Outside, the silence of the night was disturbed by many unusual noises: +a far-off roar, as of the breaking of waves on a seashore, arose from +the direction of the town, where the last scenes of the election were +being enacted. Every few minutes motor cars rushed past the house at a +furious rate, and the air was full of the sounds of distant shouts and +singing. + +Ruth listened and started nervously at every passing footstep. Those +who can imagine the kind of expression there would be upon the face of +a hunted thief, who, finding himself encompassed and brought to bay by +his pursuers, looks wildly around in a vain search for some way of +escape, may be able to form some conception of the terror-stricken way +in which she listened to every sound that penetrated into the stillness +of the dimly lighted room. And ever and again, when her wandering +glance reverted to the frail atom of humanity nestling by her side, her +brows contracted and her eyes filled with bitter tears, as she weakly +reached out her trembling hand to adjust its coverings, faintly +murmuring, with quivering lips and a bursting heart, some words of +endearment and pity. And then--alarmed by the footsteps of some chance +passerby, or by the closing of the door of a neighbouring house, and +fearing that it was the sound she had been waiting for and dreading +through all those weary hours, she would turn in terror to Mary Linden, +sitting in the chair at the bedside, sewing by the light of the shaded +lamp, and take hold of her arm as if seeking protection from some +impending danger. + +It was after twelve o'clock when Easton came home. Ruth recognized his +footsteps before he reached the house, and her heart seemed to stop +beating when she heard the clang of the gate, as it closed after he had +passed through. + +It had been Mary's intention to withdraw before he came into the room, +but the sick woman clung to her in such evident fear, and entreated her +so earnestly not to go away, that she remained. + +It was with a feeling of keen disappointment that Easton noticed how +Ruth shrank away from him, for he had expected and hoped, that after +this, they would be good friends once more; but he tried to think that +it was because she was ill, and when she would not let him touch the +child lest he should awaken it, he agreed without question. + +The next day, and for the greater part of the time during the next +fortnight, Ruth was in a raging fever. There were intervals when +although weak and exhausted, she was in her right mind, but most of the +time she was quite unconscious of her surroundings and often delirious. +Mrs Owen came every day to help to look after her, because Mary just +then had a lot of needlework to do, and consequently could only give +part of her time to Ruth, who, in her delirium, lived and told over and +over again all the sorrow and suffering of the last few months. And so +the two friends, watching by her bedside, learned her dreadful secret. + +Sometimes--in her delirium--she seemed possessed of an intense and +terrible loathing for the poor little creature she had brought into the +world, and was with difficulty prevented from doing it violence. Once +she seized it cruelly and threw it fiercely from her to the foot of the +bed, as if it had been some poisonous or loathsome thing. And so it +often became necessary to take the child away out of the room, so that +she could not see or hear it, but when her senses came back to her, her +first thought was for the child, and there must have been in her mind +some faint recollection of what she had said and done in her madness, +for when she saw that the baby was not in its accustomed place her +distress and alarm were painful to see, as she entreated them with +tears to give it back to her. And then she would kiss and fondle it +with all manner of endearing words, and cry bitterly. + +Easton did not see or hear most of this; he only knew that she was very +ill; for he went out every day on the almost hopeless quest for work. +Rushton's had next to nothing to do, and most of the other shops were +in a similar plight. Dauber and Botchit had one or two jobs going on, +and Easton tried several times to get a start for them, but was always +told they were full up. The sweating methods of this firm continued to +form a favourite topic of conversation with the unemployed workmen, who +railed at and cursed them horribly. It had leaked out that they were +paying only sixpence an hour to most of the skilled workmen in their +employment, and even then the conditions under which they worked were, +if possible, worse than those obtaining at most other firms. The men +were treated like so many convicts, and every job was a hell where +driving and bullying reigned supreme, and obscene curses and blasphemy +polluted the air from morning till night. The resentment of those who +were out of work was directed, not only against the heads of the firm, +but also against the miserable, half-starved drudges in their +employment. These poor wretches were denounced as 'scabs' and +'wastrels' by the unemployed workmen but all the same, whenever Dauber +and Botchit wanted some extra hands they never had any difficulty in +obtaining them, and it often happened that those who had been loudest +and bitterest in their denunciations were amongst the first to rush off +eagerly to apply there for a job whenever there was a chance of getting +one. + +Frequently the light was seen burning late at night in Rushton's +office, where Nimrod and his master were figuring out prices and +writing out estimates, cutting down the amounts to the lowest possible +point in the hope of underbidding their rivals. Now and then they were +successful but whether they secured the work or not, Nimrod always +appeared equally miserable. If they got the 'job' it often showed such +a small margin of profit that Rushton used to grumble at him and +suggest mismanagement. If their estimates were too high and they lost +the work, he used to demand of Nimrod why it was possible for Dauber +and Botchit to do work so much more cheaply. + +As the unemployed workmen stood in groups at the corners or walked +aimlessly about the streets, they often saw Hunter pass by on his +bicycle, looking worried and harassed. He was such a picture of +misery, that it began to be rumoured amongst the men, that he had never +been the same since the time he had that fall off the bike; and some of +them declared, that they wouldn't mind betting that ole Misery would +finish up by going off his bloody rocker. + +At intervals--whenever a job came in--Owen, Crass, Slyme, Sawkins and +one or two others, continued to be employed at Rushton's, but they +seldom managed to make more than two or three days a week, even when +there was anything to do. + + + +Chapter 50 + +Sundered + + +During the next few weeks Ruth continued very ill. Although the +delirium had left her and did not return, her manner was still very +strange, and it was remarkable that she slept but little and at long +intervals. Mrs Owen came to look after her every day, not going back +to her own home till the evening. Frankie used to call for her as he +came out of school and then they used to go home together, taking +little Freddie Easton with them also, for his own mother was not able +to look after him and Mary Linden had so much other work to do. + +On Wednesday evening, when the child was about five weeks old, as Mrs +Owen was wishing her good night, Ruth took hold of her hand and after +saying how grateful she was for all that she had done, she asked +whether--supposing anything happened to herself--Nora would promise to +take charge of Freddie for Easton. Owen's wife gave the required +promise, at the same time affecting to regard the supposition as +altogether unlikely, and assuring her that she would soon be better, +but she secretly wondered why Ruth had not mentioned the other child as +well. + +Nora went away about five o'clock, leaving Ruth's bedroom door open so +that Mrs Linden could hear her call if she needed anything. About a +quarter of an hour after Nora and the two children had gone, Mary +Linden went upstairs to see Ruth, who appeared to have fallen fast +asleep; so she returned to her needlework downstairs. The weather had +been very cloudy all day, there had been rain at intervals and it was a +dark evening, so dark that she had to light the lamp to see her work. +Charley sat on the hearthrug in front of the fire repairing one of the +wheels of a wooden cart that he had made with the assistance of another +boy, and Elsie busied herself preparing the tea. + +Easton was not yet home; Rushton & Co. had a few jobs to do and he had +been at work since the previous Thursday. The place where he was +working was some considerable distance away, so it was nearly half past +six when he came home. They heard him at the gate and at her mother's +direction Elsie went quickly to the front door, which was ajar, to ask +him to walk as quietly as possible so as not to wake Ruth. + +Mary had prepared the table for his tea in the kitchen, where there was +a bright fire with the kettle singing on the hob. He lit the lamp and +after removing his hat and overcoat, put the kettle on the fire and +while he was waiting for it to boil he went softly upstairs. There was +no lamp burning in the bedroom and the place would have been in utter +darkness but for the red glow of the fire, which did not dispel the +prevailing obscurity sufficiently to enable him to discern the +different objects in the room distinctly. The intense silence that +reigned struck him with a sudden terror. He crossed swiftly over to +the bed and a moment's examination sufficed to tell him that it was +empty. He called her name, but there was no answer, and a hurried +search only made it certain that she was nowhere in the house. + +Mrs Linden now remembered what Owen's wife had told her of the strange +request that Ruth had made, and as she recounted it to Easton, his +fears became intensified a thousandfold. He was unable to form any +opinion of the reason of her going or of where she had gone, as he +rushed out to seek for her. Almost unconsciously he directed his steps +to Owen's house, and afterwards the two men went to every place where +they thought it possible she might have gone, but without finding any +trace of her. + +Her father lived a short distance outside the town, and this was one of +the first places they went to, although Easton did not think it likely +she would go there, for she had not been on friendly terms with her +stepmother, and as he had anticipated, it was a fruitless journey. + +They sought for her in every conceivable place, returning often to +Easton's house to see if she had come home, but they found no trace of +her, nor met anyone who had seen her, which was, perhaps, because the +dreary, rain-washed streets were deserted by all except those whose +business compelled them to be out. + +About eleven o'clock Nora was standing at the front door waiting for +Owen and Easton, when she thought she could discern a woman's figure in +the shadow of the piers of the gate opposite. It was an unoccupied +house with a garden in front, and the outlines of the bushes it +contained were so vague in the darkness that it was impossible to be +certain; but the longer she looked the more convinced she became that +there was someone there. At last she summoned sufficient courage to +cross over the road, and as she nervously drew near the gate it became +evident that she had not been mistaken. There was a woman standing +there--a woman with a child in her arms, leaning against one of the +pillars and holding the iron bars of the gate with her left hand. It +was Ruth. Nora recognized her even in the semi-darkness. Her attitude +was one of extreme exhaustion, and as Nora touched her, she perceived +that she was wet through and trembling; but although she was almost +fainting with fatigue she would not consent to go indoors until +repeatedly assured that Easton was not there, and that Nora would not +let him see her if he came. And when at length she yielded and went +into the house she would not sit down or take off her hat or jacket +until--crouching on the floor beside Nora's chair with her face hidden +in the latter's lap--she had sobbed out her pitiful confession, the +same things that she had unwittingly told to the same hearer so often +before during the illness, the only fact that was new was the account +of her wanderings that night. + +She cried so bitterly and looked so forlorn and heartbroken and ashamed +as she faltered out her woeful story; so consumed with +self-condemnation, making no excuse for herself except to repeat over +and over again that she had never meant to do wrong, that Nora could +not refrain from weeping also as she listened. + +It appeared that, unable to bear the reproach that Easton's presence +seemed to imply, or to endure the burden of her secret any longer, and +always haunted by the thought of the lake in the park, Ruth had formed +the dreadful resolution of taking her own life and the child's. When +she arrived at the park gates they were closed and locked for the night +but she remembered that there was another means of entering--the place +at the far end of the valley where the park was not fenced in, so she +had gone there--nearly three miles--only to find that railings had +recently been erected and therefore it was no longer possible to get +into the park by that way. And then, when she found it impossible to +put her resolve into practice, she had realized for the first time the +folly and wickedness of the act she had meant to commit. But although +she had abandoned her first intention, she said she could never go home +again; she would take a room somewhere and get some work to do, or +perhaps she might be able to get a situation where they would allow her +to have the child with her, or failing that she would work and pay +someone to look after it; but she could never go home any more. If she +only had somewhere to stay for a few days until she could get something +to do, she was sure she would be able to earn her living, but she could +not go back home; she felt that she would rather walk about the streets +all night than go there again. + +It was arranged that Ruth should have the small apartment which had +been Frankie's playroom, the necessary furniture being obtained from a +second-hand shop close by. Easton did not learn the real reason of her +flight until three days afterwards. At first he attributed it to a +recurrence of the mental disorder that she had suffered from after the +birth of the child, and he had been glad to leave her at Owen's place +in Nora's care, but on the evening of the third day when he returned +home from work, he found a letter in Ruth's handwriting which told him +all there was to tell. + +When he recovered from the stupefaction into which he was thrown by the +perusal of this letter, his first thought was to seek out Slyme, but he +found upon inquiring that the latter had left the town the previous +morning. Slyme's landlady said he had told her that he had been +offered several months' work in London, which he had accepted. The +truth was that Slyme had heard of Ruth's flight--nearly everyone knew +about it as a result of the inquiries that had been made for her--and, +guessing the cause, he had prudently cleared out. + +Easton made no attempt to see Ruth, but he went to Owen's and took +Freddie away, saying he would pay Mrs Linden to look after the child +whilst he was at work. His manner was that of a deeply injured +man--the possibility that he was in any way to blame for what had +happened did not seem to occur to his mind at all. + +As for Ruth she made no resistance to his taking the child away from +her, although she cried about it in secret. She got some work a few +days afterwards--helping the servants at one of the large +boarding-houses on the Grand Parade. + +Nora looked after the baby for her while she was at work, an +arrangement that pleased Frankie vastly; he said it was almost as good +as having a baby of their very own. + +For the first few weeks after Ruth went away Easton tried to persuade +himself that he did not very much regret what had happened. Mrs Linden +looked after Freddie, and Easton tried to believe that he would really +be better off now that he had only himself and the child to provide for. + +At first, whenever he happened to meet Owen, they used to speak of +Ruth, or to be more correct, Easton used to speak of her; but one day +when the two men were working together Owen had expressed himself +rather offensively. He seemed to think that Easton was more to blame +than she was; and afterwards they avoided the subject, although Easton +found it difficult to avoid the thoughts the other man's words +suggested. + +Now and then he heard of Ruth and learnt that she was still working at +the same place; and once he met her suddenly and unexpectedly in the +street. They passed each other hurriedly and he did not see the +scarlet flush that for an instant dyed her face, nor the deathly pallor +that succeeded it. + +He never went to Owen's place or sent any communication to Ruth, nor +did she ever send him any; but although Easton did not know it she +frequently saw Freddie, for when Elsie Linden took the child out she +often called to see Mrs Owen. + +As time went on and the resentment he had felt towards her lost its +first bitterness, Easton began to think there was perhaps some little +justification for what Owen had said, and gradually there grew within +him an immense desire for reconciliation--to start afresh and to forget +all that had happened; but the more he thought of this the more +hopeless and impossible of realization it seemed. + +Although perhaps he was not conscious of it, this desire arose solely +from selfish motives. The money he earned seemed to melt away almost +as soon as he received it; to his surprise he found that he was not +nearly so well off in regard to personal comfort as he had been +formerly, and the house seemed to grow more dreary and desolate as the +wintry days dragged slowly by. Sometimes--when he had the money--he +sought forgetfulness in the society of Crass and the other frequenters +of the Cricketers, but somehow or other he could not take the same +pleasure in the conversation of these people as formerly, when he had +found it--as he now sometimes wondered to remember--so entertaining as +to almost make him forget Ruth's existence. + +One evening about three weeks before Christmas, as he and Owen were +walking homewards together from work, Easton reverted for the first +time to their former conversation. He spoke with a superior air: his +manner and tone indicating that he thought he was behaving with great +generosity. He would be willing to forgive her and have her back, he +said, if she would come: but he would never be able to tolerate the +child. Of course it might be sent to an orphanage or some similar +institution, but he was afraid Ruth would never consent to that, and he +knew that her stepmother would not take it. + +'If you can persuade her to return to you, we'll take the child,' said +Owen. + +'Do you think your wife would be willing?' + +'She has already suggested doing so.' + +'To Ruth?' + +'No: to me. We thought it a possible way for you, and my wife would +like to have the child.' + +'But would you be able to afford it?' said Easton. + +'We should manage all right.' + +'Of course,' said Easton, 'if Slyme comes back he might agree to pay +something for its keep.' + +Owen flushed. + +'I wouldn't take his money.' + +After a long pause Easton continued: 'Would you mind asking Mrs Owen to +suggest it to Ruth?' + +'If you like I'll get her to suggest it--as a message from you.' + +'What I meant,' said Easton hesitatingly, 'was that your wife might +just suggest it--casual like--and advise her that it would be the best +way, and then you could let me know what Ruth said.' + +'No,' replied Owen, unable any longer to control his resentment of the +other's manner, 'as things stand now, if it were not for the other +child, I should advise her to have nothing further to do with you. You +seem to think that you are acting a very generous part in being +"willing" to have her back, but she's better off now than she was with +you. I see no reason--except for the other child--why she should go +back to you. As far as I understand it, you had a good wife and you +ill-treated her.' + +'I never ill-treated her! I never raised my hand to her--at least only +once, and then I didn't hurt her. Does she say I ill-treated her.' + +'Oh no: from what my wife tells me she only blames herself, but I'm +drawing my own conclusions. You may not have struck her, but you did +worse--you treated her with indifference and exposed her to temptation. +What has happened is the natural result of your neglect and want of +care for her. The responsibility for what has happened is mainly +yours, but apparently you wish to pose now as being very generous and +to "forgive her"--you're "willing" to take her back; but it seems to me +that it would be more fitting that you should ask her to forgive you.' + +Easton made no answer and after a long silence the other continued: + +'I would not advise her to go back to you on such terms as you seem to +think right, because if you became reconciled on such terms I don't +think either of you could be happy. Your only chance of happiness is +to realize that you have both done wrong; that each of you has +something to forgive; to forgive and never speak of it again.' + +Easton made no reply and a few minutes afterwards, their ways +diverging, they wished each other 'Good night'. + +They were working for Rushton--painting the outside of a new +conservatory at Mr Sweater's house, 'The Cave'. This job was finished +the next day and at four o'clock the boy brought the handcart, which +they loaded with their ladders and other materials. They took these +back to the yard and then, as it was Friday night, they went up to the +front shop and handed in their time sheets. Afterwards, as they were +about to separate, Easton again referred to the subject of their +conversation of the previous evening. He had been very reserved and +silent all day, scarcely uttering a word except when the work they had +been engaged in made it necessary to do so, and there was now a sort of +catch in his voice as he spoke. + +'I've been thinking over what you said last night; it's quite true. +I've been a great deal to blame. I wrote to Ruth last night and +admitted it to her. I'll take it as a favour if you and your wife will +say what you can to help me get her back.' + +Owen stretched out his hand and as the other took it, said: 'You may +rely on us both to do our best.' + + + +Chapter 51 + +The Widow's Son + + +The next morning when they went to the yard at half past eight o'clock +Hunter told them that there was nothing to do, but that they had better +come on Monday in case some work came in. They accordingly went on the +Monday, and Tuesday and Wednesday, but as nothing 'came in' of course +they did not do any work. On Thursday morning the weather was dark and +bitterly cold. The sky presented an unbroken expanse of dull grey and +a keen north wind swept through the cheerless streets. Owen--who had +caught cold whilst painting the outside of the conservatory at +Sweater's house the previous week--did not get to the yard until ten +o'clock. He felt so ill that he would not have gone at all if they had +not needed the money he would be able to earn if there was anything to +do. Strange though it may appear to the advocates of thrift, although +he had been so fortunate as to be in employment when so many others +were idle, they had not saved any money. On the contrary, during all +the summer they had not been able to afford to have proper food or +clothing. Every week most of the money went to pay arrears of rent or +some other debts, so that even whilst he was at work they had often to +go without some of the necessaries of life. They had broken boots, +shabby, insufficient clothing, and barely enough to eat. + +The weather had become so bitterly cold that, fearing he would be laid +up if he went without it any longer, he took his overcoat out of pawn, +and that week they had to almost starve. Not that it was much better +other weeks, for lately he had only been making six and a half hours a +day--from eight-thirty in the morning till four o'clock in the evening, +and on Saturday only four and a half hours--from half past eight till +one. This made his wages--at sevenpence an hour--twenty-one shillings +and sevenpence a week--that is, when there was work to do every day, +which was not always. Sometimes they had to stand idle three days out +of six. The wages of those who got sixpence halfpenny came out at one +pound and twopence--when they worked every day--and as for those +who--like Sawkins--received only fivepence, their week's wages amounted +to fifteen and sixpence. + +When they were only employed for two or three days or perhaps only a +few hours, their 'Saturday night' sometimes amounted to half a +sovereign, seven and sixpence, five shillings or even less. Then most +of them said that it was better than nothing at all. + +Many of them were married men, so, in order to make existence possible, +their wives went out charing or worked in laundries. They had children +whom they had to bring up for the most part on 'skim' milk, bread, +margarine, and adulterated tea. Many of these children--little mites +of eight or nine years--went to work for two or three hours in the +morning before going to school; the same in the evening after school, +and all day on Saturday, carrying butchers' trays loaded with meat, +baskets of groceries and vegetables, cans of paraffin oil, selling or +delivering newspapers, and carrying milk. As soon as they were old +enough they got Half Time certificates and directly they were fourteen +they left school altogether and went to work all the day. When they +were old enough some of them tried to join the Army or Navy, but were +found physically unfit. + +It is not much to be wondered at that when they became a little older +they were so degenerate intellectually that they imagined that the +surest way to obtain better conditions would be to elect gangs of +Liberal and Tory land-grabbers, sweaters, swindlers and lawyers to rule +over them. + +When Owen arrived at the yard he found Bert White cleaning out the +dirty pots in the paint-shop. The noise he made with the scraping +knife prevented him from hearing Owen's approach and the latter stood +watching him for some minutes without speaking. The stone floor of the +paint shop was damp and shiny and the whole place was chilly as a tomb. +The boy was trembling with cold and he looked pitifully undersized and +frail as he bent over his work with an old apron girt about him. +Because it was so cold he was wearing his jacket with the ends of the +sleeves turned back to keep them clean, or to prevent them getting any +dirtier, for they were already in the same condition as the rest of his +attire, which was thickly encrusted with dried paint of many colours, +and his hands and fingernails were grimed with it. + +As he watched the poor boy bending over his task, Owen thought of +Frankie, and with a feeling akin to terror wondered whether he would +ever be in a similar plight. + +When he saw Owen, the boy left off working and wished him good morning, +remarking that it was very cold. + +'Why don't you light a fire? There's lots of wood lying about the +yard.' + +'No,' said Bert shaking his head. 'That would never do! Misery +wouldn't 'arf ramp if 'e caught me at it. I used to 'ave a fire 'ere +last winter till Rushton found out, and 'e kicked up an orful row and +told me to move meself and get some work done and then I wouldn't feel +the cold.' + +'Oh, he said that, did he?' said Owen, his pale face becoming suddenly +suffused with blood. 'We'll see about that.' + +He went out into the yard and crossing over to where--under a +shed--there was a great heap of waste wood, stuff that had been taken +out of places where Rushton & Co. had made alterations, he gathered an +armful of it and was returning to the paintshop when Sawkins accosted +him. + +'You mustn't go burnin' any of that, you know! That's all got to be +saved and took up to the bloke's house. Misery spoke about it only +this mornin'.' + +Owen did not answer him. He carried the wood into the shop and after +throwing it into the fireplace he poured some old paint over it, and, +applying a match, produced a roaring fire. Then he brought in several +more armfuls of wood and piled them in a corner of the shop. Bert took +no part in these proceedings, and at first rather disapproved of them +because he was afraid there would be trouble when Misery came, but when +the fire was an accomplished fact he warmed his hands and shifted his +work to the other side of the bench so as to get the benefit of the +heat. + +Owen waited for about half an hour to see if Hunter would return, but +as that disciple did not appear, he decided not to wait any longer. +Before leaving he gave Bert some instructions: + +'Keep up the fire with all the old paint that you can scrape off those +things and any other old paint or rubbish that's here, and whenever it +grows dull put more wood on. There's a lot of old stuff here that's of +no use except to be thrown away or burnt. Burn it all. If Hunter says +anything, tell him that I lit the fire, and that I told you to keep it +burning. If you want more wood, go out and take it.' + +'All right,' replied Bert. + +On his way out Owen spoke to Sawkins. His manner was so menacing, his +face so pale, and there was such a strange glare in his eyes, that the +latter thought of the talk there had been about Owen being mad, and +felt half afraid of him. + +'I am going to the office to see Rushton; if Hunter comes here, you say +I told you to tell him that if I find the boy in that shop again +without a fire, I'll report it to the Society for the Prevention of +Cruelty to Children. And as for you, if the boy comes out here to get +more wood, don't you attempt to interfere with him.' + +'I don't want to interfere with the bloody kid,' grunted Sawkins. 'It +seems to me as if he's gorn orf 'is bloody crumpet,' he added as he +watched Owen walking rapidly down the street. 'I can't understand why +people can't mind their own bloody business: anyone would think the boy +belonged to 'IM.' + +That was just how the matter presented itself to Owen. The idea that +it was his own child who was to be treated in this way possessed and +infuriated him as he strode savagely along. In the vicinity of the +Slave Market on the Grand Parade he passed--without seeing +them--several groups of unemployed artisans whom he knew. Some of them +were offended and remarked that he was getting stuck up, but others, +observing how strange he looked, repeated the old prophecy that one of +these days Owen would go out of his mind. + +As he drew near to his destination large flakes of snow began to fall. +He walked so rapidly and was in such a fury that by the time he reached +the shop he was scarcely able to speak. + +'Is--Hunter--or Rushton here?' he demanded of the shopman. + +'Hunter isn't, but the guv'nor is. What was it you wanted?' + +'He'll soon--know--that,' panted Owen as he strode up to the office +door, and without troubling to knock, flung it violently open and +entered. + +The atmosphere of this place was very different from that of the damp +cellar where Bert was working. A grate fitted with asbestos blocks and +lit with gas communicated a genial warmth to the air. + +Rushton was standing leaning over Miss Wade's chair with his left arm +round her neck. Owen recollected afterwards that her dress was +disarranged. She retired hastily to the far end of the room as Rushton +jumped away from her, and stared in amazement and confusion at the +intruder--he was too astonished and embarrassed to speak. Owen stood +panting and quivering in the middle of the office and pointed a +trembling finger at his employer: + +'I've come--here--to tell--you--that--if I find young--Bert +White--working--down in that shop--without a fire--I'll have you +prosecuted. The place is not good enough for a stable--if you owned a +valuable dog--you wouldn't keep it there--I give you fair warning--I +know--enough--about you--to put you--where you deserve to be--if you +don't treat him better I'll have you punished I'll show you up.' + +Rushton continued to stare at him in mingled confusion, fear and +perplexity; he did not yet comprehend exactly what it was all about; he +was guiltily conscious of so many things which he might reasonably fear +to be shown up or prosecuted for if they were known, and the fact of +being caught under such circumstances with Miss Wade helped to reduce +him to a condition approaching terror. + +'If the boy has been there without a fire, I 'aven't known anything +about it,' he stammered at last. 'Mr 'Unter has charge of all those +matters.' + +'You--yourself--forbade him--to make a fire last winter--and +anyhow--you know about it now. You obtained money from his mother +under the pretence--that you were going--to teach him a trade--but for +the last twelve months--you have been using him--as if he were--a beast +of burden. I advise you to see to it--or I shall--find--means--to make +you--wish you had done so.' + +With this Owen turned and went out, leaving the door open, and Rushton +in a state of mind compounded of fear, amazement and anger. + +As he walked homewards through the snow-storm, Owen began to realize +that the consequence of what he had done would be that Rushton would +not give him any more work, and as he reflected on all that this would +mean to those at home, for a moment he doubted whether he had done +right. But when he told Nora what had happened she said there were +plenty of other firms in the town who would employ him--when they had +the work. He had done without Rushton before and could do so again; +for her part--whatever the consequences might be--she was glad that he +had acted as he did. + +'We'll get through somehow, I suppose,' said Owen, wearily. 'There's +not much chance of getting a job anywhere else just now, but I shall +try to get some work on my own account. I shall do some samples of +show-cards the same as I did last winter and try to get orders from +some of the shops--they usually want something extra at this time, but +I'm afraid it is rather too late: most of them already have all they +want.' + +'I shouldn't go out again today if I were you,' said Nora, noticing how +ill he looked. 'You should stay at home and read, or write up those +minutes.' + +The minutes referred to were those of the last meeting of the local +branch of the Painters' Society, of which Owen was the secretary, and +as the snow continued to fall, he occupied himself after dinner in the +manner his wife suggested, until four o'clock, when Frankie returned +from school bringing with him a large snowball, and crying out as a +piece of good news that the snow was still falling heavily, and that he +believed it was freezing! + +They went to bed very early that night, for it was necessary to +economize the coal, and not only that, but--because the rooms were so +near the roof--it was not possible to keep the place warm no matter how +much coal was used. The fire seemed, if anything, to make the place +colder, for it caused the outer air to pour in through the joints of +the ill-fitting doors and windows. + +Owen lay awake for the greater part of the night. The terror of the +future made rest or sleep impossible. He got up very early the next +morning--long before it was light--and after lighting the fire, set +about preparing the samples he had mentioned to Nora, but found that it +would not be possible to do much in this direction without buying more +cardboard, for most of what he had was not in good condition. + +They had bread and butter and tea for breakfast. Frankie had his in +bed and it was decided to keep him away from school until after dinner +because the weather was so very cold and his only pair of boots were so +saturated with moisture from having been out in the snow the previous +day. + +'I shall make a few inquiries to see if there's any other work to be +had before I buy the cardboard,' said Owen, 'although I'm afraid it's +not much use.' + +Just as he was preparing to go out, the front door bell rang, and as he +was going down to answer it he saw Bert White coming upstairs. The boy +was carrying a flat, brown-paper parcel under his arm. + +'A corfin plate,' he explained as he arrived at the door. 'Wanted at +once--Misery ses you can do it at 'ome, an' I've got to wait for it.' + +Owen and his wife looked at each other with intense relief. So he was +not to be dismissed after all. It was almost too good to be true. + +'There's a piece of paper inside the parcel with the name of the party +what's dead,' continued Bert, 'and here's a little bottle of Brunswick +black for you to do the inscription with.' + +'Did he send any other message?' + +'Yes: he told me to tell you there's a job to be started Monday +morning--a couple of rooms to be done out somewhere. Got to be +finished by Thursday; and there's another job 'e wants you to do this +afternoon--after dinner--so you've got to come to the yard at one +o'clock. 'E told me to tell you 'e meant to leave a message for you +yesterday morning, but 'e forgot.' + +'What did he say to you about the fire--anything?' + +'Yes: they both of 'em came about an hour after you went away--Misery +and the Bloke too--but they didn't kick up a row. I wasn't arf +frightened, I can tell you, when I saw 'em both coming, but they was +quite nice. The Bloke ses to me, "Ah, that's right, my boy," 'e ses. +"Keep up a good fire. I'm going to send you some coke," 'e ses. And +then they 'ad a look round and 'e told Sawkins to put some new panes of +glass where the winder was broken, and--you know that great big +packing-case what was under the truck shed?' + +'Yes.' + +'Well, 'e told Sawkins to saw it up and cover over the stone floor of +the paint-shop with it. It ain't 'arf all right there now. I've +cleared out all the muck from under the benches and we've got two sacks +of coke sent from the gas-works, and the Bloke told me when that's all +used up I've got to get a order orf Miss Wade for another lot.' + +At one o'clock Owen was at the yard, where he saw Misery, who +instructed him to go to the front shop and paint some numbers on the +racks where the wallpapers were stored. Whilst he was doing this work +Rushton came in and greeted him in a very friendly way. + +'I'm very glad you let me know about the boy working in that +paint-shop,' he observed after a few preliminary remarks. 'I can +assure you as I don't want the lad to be uncomfortable, but you know I +can't attend to everything myself. I'm much obliged to you for telling +me about it; I think you did quite right; I should have done the same +myself.' + +Owen did not know what to reply, but Rushton walked off without +waiting... + + + +Chapter 52 + +'It's a Far, Far Better Thing that I do, than I have Ever Done' + + +Although Owen, Easton and Crass and a few others were so lucky as to +have had a little work to do during the last few months, the majority +of their fellow workmen had been altogether out of employment most of +the time, and meanwhile the practical business-men, and the pretended +disciples of Christ--the liars and hypocrites who professed to believe +that all men are brothers and God their Father--had continued to enact +the usual farce that they called 'Dealing' with the misery that +surrounded them on every side. They continued to organize 'Rummage' +and 'Jumble' sales and bazaars, and to distribute their rotten cast-off +clothes and boots and their broken victuals and soup to such of the +Brethren as were sufficiently degraded to beg for them. The beautiful +Distress Committee was also in full operation; over a thousand Brethren +had registered themselves on its books. Of this number--after careful +investigation--the committee had found that no fewer than six hundred +and seventy-two were deserving of being allowed to work for their +living. The Committee would probably have given these six hundred and +seventy-two the necessary permission, but it was somewhat handicapped +by the fact that the funds at its disposal were only sufficient to +enable that number of Brethren to be employed for about three days. +However, by adopting a policy of temporizing, delay, and general artful +dodging, the Committee managed to create the impression that they were +Dealing with the Problem. + +If it had not been for a cunning device invented by Brother Rushton, a +much larger number of the Brethren would have succeeded in registering +themselves as unemployed on the books of the Committee. In previous +years it had been the practice to issue an application form called a +'Record Paper' to any Brother who asked for one, and the Brother +returned it after filling it in himself. At a secret meeting of the +Committee Rushton proposed--amid laughter and applause, it was such a +good joke--a new and better way, calculated to keep down the number of +applicants. The result of this innovation was that no more forms were +issued, but the applicants for work were admitted into the office one +at a time, and were there examined by a junior clerk, somewhat after +the manner of a French Juge d'Instruction interrogating a criminal, the +clerk filling in the form according to the replies of the culprit. + +'What's your name?' + +'Where do you live?' + +'How long have you been living there?' + +'Where did you live before you went there?' + +'How long were you living at that place?' + +'Why did you move?' + +'Did you owe any rent when you left?' + +'What was your previous address?' + +'How old are you? When was your last birthday?' + +'What is your Trade, Calling, Employment, or Occupation?' + +'Are you Married or single or a Widower or what?' + +'How many children have you? How many boys? How many girls? Do they +go to work? What do they earn?' + + +'What kind of a house do you live in? How many rooms are there?' + +'How much rent do you owe?' + +'Who was your last employer? What was the foreman's name? How long +did you work there? What kind of work did you do? Why did you leave?' + +'What have you been doing for the last five years? What kind of work, +how many hours a day? What wages did you get?' + +'Give the full names and addresses of all the different employers you +have worked for during the last five years, and the reasons why you +left them?' + +'Give the names of all the foremen you have worked under during the +last five years?' + +'Does your wife earn anything? How much?' + +'Do you get any money from any Club or Society, or from any Charity, or +from any other source?' + +'Have you ever received Poor Relief?' + +'Have you ever worked for a Distress Committee before?' + +'Have you ever done any other kinds of work than those you have +mentioned? Do you think you would be fit for any other kind? 'Have you +any references?' and so on and so forth. + +When the criminal had answered all the questions, and when his answers +had all been duly written down, he was informed that a member of the +Committee, or an Authorized Officer, or some Other Person, would in due +course visit his home and make inquiries about him, after which the +Authorized Officer or Other Person would make a report to the +Committee, who would consider it at their next meeting. + +As the interrogation of each criminal occupied about half an hour, to +say nothing of the time he was kept waiting, it will be seen that as a +means of keeping down the number of registered unemployed the idea +worked splendidly. + +When Rushton introduced this new rule it was carried unanimously, Dr +Weakling being the only dissentient, but of course he--as Brother +Grinder remarked--was always opposed to any sensible proposal. There +was one consolation, however, Grinder added, they was not likely to be +pestered with 'im much longer; the first of November was coming and if +he--Grinder--knowed anything of working men they was sure to give +Weakling the dirty kick out directly they got the chance. + +A few days afterwards the result of the municipal election justified +Brother Grinder's prognostications, for the working men voters of Dr +Weakling's ward did give him the dirty kick out: but Rushton, Didlum, +Grinder and several other members of the band were triumphantly +returned with increased majorities. + +Mr Dauber, of Dauber and Botchit, had already been elected a Guardian +of the Poor. + +During all this time Hunter, who looked more worried and miserable as +the dreary weeks went by, was occupied every day in supervising what +work was being done and in running about seeking for more. Nearly +every night he remained at the office until a late hour, poring over +specifications and making out estimates. The police had become so +accustomed to seeing the light in the office that as a rule they took +no notice of it, but one Thursday night--exactly one week after the +scene between Owen and Rushton about the boy--the constable on the beat +observed the light there much later than usual. At first he paid no +particular attention to the fact, but when night merged into morning +and the light still remained, his curiosity was aroused. + +He knocked at the door, but no one came in answer, and no sound +disturbed the deathlike stillness that reigned within. The door was +locked, but he was not able to tell whether it had been closed from the +inside or outside, because it had a spring latch. The office window +was low down, but it was not possible to see in because the back of the +glass had been painted. + +The constable thought that the most probable explanation of the mystery +was that whoever had been there earlier in the evening had forgotten to +turn out the light when they went away; it was not likely that thieves +or anyone who had no business to be there would advertise their +presence by lighting the gas. + +He made a note of the incident in his pocket-book and was about to +resume his beat when he was joined by his inspector. The latter agreed +that the conclusion arrived at by the constable was probably the right +one and they were about to pass on when the inspector noticed a small +speck of light shining through the lower part of the painted window, +where a small piece of the paint had either been scratched or had +shelled off the glass. He knelt down and found that it was possible to +get a view of the interior of the office, and as he peered through he +gave a low exclamation. When he made way for his subordinate to look +in his turn, the constable was with some difficulty able to distinguish +the figure of a man lying prone upon the floor. + +It was an easy task for the burly policeman to force open the office +door: a single push of his shoulder wrenched it from its fastenings and +as it flew back the socket of the lock fell with a splash into a great +pool of blood that had accumulated against the threshold, flowing from +the place where Hunter was lying on his back, his arms extended and his +head nearly severed from his body. On the floor, close to his right +hand, was an open razor. An overturned chair lay on the floor by the +side of the table where he usually worked, the table itself being +littered with papers and drenched with blood. + +Within the next few days Crass resumed the role he had played when +Hunter was ill during the summer, taking charge of the work and +generally doing his best to fill the dead man's place, although--as he +confided to certain of his cronies in the bar of the Cricketers--he had +no intention of allowing Rushton to do the same as Hunter had done. +One of his first jobs--on the morning after the discovery of the +body--was to go with Mr Rushton to look over a house where some work +was to be done for which an estimate had to be given. It was this +estimate that Hunter had been trying to make out the previous evening +in the office, for they found that the papers on his table were covered +with figures and writing relating to this work. These papers justified +the subsequent verdict of the Coroner's jury that Hunter committed +suicide in a fit of temporary insanity, for they were covered with a +lot of meaningless scribbling, the words wrongly spelt and having no +intelligible connection with each other. There was one sum that he had +evidently tried repeatedly to do correctly, but which came wrong in a +different way every time. The fact that he had the razor in his +possession seemed to point to his having premeditated the act, but this +was accounted for at the inquest by the evidence of the last person who +saw him alive, a hairdresser, who stated that Hunter had left the razor +with him to be sharpened a few days previously and that he had called +for it on the evening of the tragedy. He had ground this razor for Mr +Hunter several times before. + +Crass took charge of all the arrangements for the funeral. He bought a +new second-hand pair of black trousers at a cast-off clothing shop in +honour of the occasion, and discarded his own low-crowned silk +hat--which was getting rather shabby--in favour of Hunter's tall one, +which he found in the office and annexed without hesitation or scruple. +It was rather large for him, but he put some folded strips of paper +inside the leather lining. Crass was a proud man as he walked in +Hunter's place at the head of the procession, trying to look solemn, +but with a half-smile on his fat, pasty face, destitute of colour +except one spot on his chin near his underlip, where there was a small +patch of inflammation about the size of a threepenny piece. This spot +had been there for a very long time. At first--as well as he could +remember--it was only a small pimple, but it had grown larger, with +something the appearance of scurvy. Crass attributed its continuation +to the cold having 'got into it last winter'. It was rather strange, +too, because he generally took care of himself when it was cold: he +always wore the warm wrap that had formerly belonged to the old lady +who died of cancer. However, Crass did not worry much about this +little sore place; he just put a little zinc ointment on it +occasionally and had no doubt that it would get well in time. + + + +Chapter 53 + +Barrington Finds a Situation + + +The revulsion of feeling that Barrington experienced during the +progress of the election was intensified by the final result. The +blind, stupid, enthusiastic admiration displayed by the philanthropists +for those who exploited and robbed them; their extraordinary apathy +with regard to their own interests; the patient, broken-spirited way in +which they endured their sufferings, tamely submitting to live in +poverty in the midst of the wealth they had helped to create; their +callous indifference to the fate of their children, and the savage +hatred they exhibited towards anyone who dared to suggest the +possibility of better things, forced upon him the thought that the +hopes he cherished were impossible of realization. The words of the +renegade Socialist recurred constantly to his mind: + +'You can be a Jesus Christ if you like, but for my part I'm finished. +For the future I intend to look after myself. As for these people, +they vote for what they want, they get what they vote for, and, by God! +they deserve nothing better! They are being beaten with whips of their +own choosing, and if I had my way they should be chastised with +scorpions. For them, the present system means joyless drudgery, +semi-starvation, rags and premature death; and they vote for it and +uphold it. Let them have what they vote for! Let them drudge and let +them starve!' + +These words kept ringing in his ears as he walked through the crowded +streets early one fine evening a few days before Christmas. The shops +were all brilliantly lighted for the display of their Christmas stores, +and the pavements and even the carriageways were thronged with +sightseers. + +Barrington was specially interested in the groups of shabbily dressed +men and women and children who gathered in the roadway in front of the +poulterers' and butchers' shops, gazing at the meat and the serried +rows of turkeys and geese decorated with ribbons and rosettes. +He knew that to come here and look at these things was the only share +many of these poor people would have of them, and he marvelled greatly +at their wonderful patience and abject resignation. + +But what struck him most of all was the appearance of many of the +women, evidently working men's wives. Their faded, ill-fitting +garments and the tired, sad expressions on their pale and careworn +faces. Some of them were alone; others were accompanied by little +children who trotted along trustfully clinging to their mothers' hands. +The sight of these poor little ones, their utter helplessness and +dependence, their patched unsightly clothing and broken boots, and the +wistful looks on their pitiful faces as they gazed into the windows of +the toy-shops, sent a pang of actual physical pain to his heart and +filled his eyes with tears. He knew that these children--naked of joy +and all that makes life dear--were being tortured by the sight of the +things that were placed so cruelly before their eyes, but which they +were not permitted to touch or to share; and, like Joseph of old, his +heart yearned over his younger brethren. + +He felt like a criminal because he was warmly clad and well fed in the +midst of all this want and unhappiness, and he flushed with shame +because he had momentarily faltered in his devotion to the noblest +cause that any man could be privileged to fight for--the uplifting of +the disconsolate and the oppressed. + +He presently came to a large toy shop outside which several children +were standing admiring the contents of the window. He recognized some +of these children and paused to watch them and to listen to their talk. +They did not notice him standing behind them as they ranged to and fro +before the window, and as he looked at them, he was reminded of the way +in which captive animals walk up and down behind the bars of their +cages. These children wandered repeatedly, backwards and forwards from +one end of the window to the other, with their little hands pressed +against the impenetrable plate glass, choosing and pointing out to each +other the particular toys that took their fancies. + +'That's mine!' cried Charley Linden, enthusiastically indicating a +large strongly built waggon. 'If I had that I'd give Freddie rides in +it and bring home lots of firewood, and we could play at fire engines +as well.' + +'I'd rather have this railway,' said Frankie Owen. 'There's a real +tunnel and real coal in the tenders; then there's the station and the +signals and a place to turn the engine round, and a red lantern to +light when there's danger on the line.' + +'Mine's this doll--not the biggest one, the one in pink with clothes +that you can take off,' said Elsie; 'and this tea set; and this +needlecase for Mother.' + +Little Freddie had let go his hold of Elsie, to whom he usually clung +tightly and was clapping his hands and chuckling with delight and +desire. 'Gee-gee?' he cried eagerly. 'Gee-gee. Pwetty Gee-gee! +Fweddy want gee-gee!' + +'But it's no use lookin' at them any longer,' continued Elsie, with a +sigh, as she took hold of Freddie's hand to lead him away. 'It's no +use lookin' at 'em any longer; the likes of us can't expect to have +such good things as them.' + +This remark served to recall Frankie and Charley to the stern realities +of life, and turning reluctantly away from the window they prepared to +follow Elsie, but Freddie had not yet learnt the lesson--he had not +lived long enough to understand that the good things of the world were +not for the likes of him; so when Elsie attempted to draw him away he +pursed up his underlip and began to cry, repeating that he wanted a +gee-gee. The other children clustered round trying to coax and comfort +him by telling him that no one was allowed to have anything out of the +windows yet--until Christmas--and that Santa Claus would be sure to +bring him a gee-gee then; but these arguments failed to make any +impression on Freddie, who tearfully insisted upon being supplied at +once. + +Whilst they were thus occupied they caught sight of Barrington, whom +they hailed with evident pleasure born of the recollection of certain +gifts of pennies and cakes they had at different times received from +him. + +'Hello, Mr Barrington,' said the two boys in a breath. + +'Hello,' replied Barrington, as he patted the baby's cheek. 'What's +the matter here? What's Freddie crying for?' + +'He wants that there 'orse, mister, the one with the real 'air on,' +said Charley, smiling indulgently like a grown-up person who realized +the absurdity of the demand. + +'Fweddie want gee-gee,' repeated the child, taking hold of Barrington's +hand and returning to the window. 'Nice gee-gee.' + +'Tell him that Santa Claus'll bring it to him on Christmas,' whispered +Elsie. 'P'raps he'll believe you and that'll satisfy him, and he's +sure to forget all about it in a little while.' + +'Are you still out of work, Mr Barrington?' inquired Frankie. + +'No,' replied Barrington slowly. 'I've got something to do at last.' + +'Well, that's a good job, ain't it?' remarked Charley. + +'Yes,' said Barrington. 'And whom do you think I'm working for?' + +'Who?' + +'Santa Claus.' + +'Santa Claus!' echoed the children, opening their eyes to the fullest +extent. + +'Yes,' continued Barrington, solemnly. 'You know, he is a very old man +now, so old that he can't do all his work himself. Last year he was so +tired that he wasn't able to get round to all the children he wanted to +give things to, and consequently a great many of them never got +anything at all. So this year he's given me a job to help him. He's +given me some money and a list of children's names, and against their +names are written the toys they are to have. My work is to buy the +things and give them to the boys and girls whose names are on the list.' + +The children listened to this narrative with bated breath. Incredible +as the story seemed, Barrington's manner was so earnest as to almost +compel belief. + +'Really and truly, or are you only having a game?' said Frankie at +length, speaking almost in a whisper. Elsie and Charley maintained an +awestruck silence, while Freddie beat upon the glass with the palms of +his hands. + +'Really and truly,' replied Barrington unblushingly as he took out his +pocket-book and turned over the leaves. 'I've got the list here; +perhaps your names are down for something.' + +The three children turned pale and their hearts beat violently as they +listened wide-eyed for what was to follow. + +'Let me see,' continued Barrington, scanning the pages of the book, +'Why, yes, here they are! Elsie Linden, one doll with clothes that can +be taken off, one tea-set, one needlecase. Freddie Easton, one horse +with real hair. Charley Linden, one four-wheeled waggon full of +groceries. Frankie Owen, one railway with tunnel, station, train with +real coal for engine, signals, red lamp and place to turn the engines +round.' + +Barrington closed the book: 'So you may as well have your things now,' +he continued, speaking in a matter-of-fact tone. 'We'll buy them here; +it will save me a lot of work. I shall not have the trouble of taking +them round to where you live. It's lucky I happened to meet you, isn't +it?' + +The children were breathless with emotion, but they just managed to +gasp out that it was--very lucky. + +As they followed him into the shop, Freddie was the only one of the +four whose condition was anything like normal. All the others were in +a half-dazed state. Frankie was afraid that he was not really awake at +all. It couldn't be true; it must be a dream. + +In addition to the hair, the horse was furnished with four wheels. They +did not have it made into a parcel, but tied some string to it and +handed it over to its new owner. The elder children were scarcely +conscious of what took place inside the shop; they knew that Barrington +was talking to the shopman, but they did not hear what was said--the +sound seemed far away and unreal. + +The shopman made the doll, the tea-set and the needlecase into one +parcel and gave it to Elsie. The railway, in a stout cardboard box, +was also wrapped up in brown paper, and Frankie's heart nearly burst +when the man put the package into his arms. + +When they came out of the toy shop they said 'Good night' to Frankie, +who went off carrying his parcel very carefully and feeling as if he +were walking on air. The others went into a provision merchant's near +by, where the groceries were purchased and packed into the waggon. + +Then Barrington, upon referring to the list to make quite certain that +he had not forgotten anything, found that Santa Claus had put down a +pair of boots each for Elsie and Charley, and when they went to buy +these, it was seen that their stockings were all ragged and full of +holes, so they went to a draper's and bought some stocking also. +Barrington said that although they were not on the list, he was sure +Santa Claus would not object--he had probably meant them to have them, +but had forgotten to put them down. + + + +Chapter 54 + +The End + + +The following evening Barrington called at Owen's place. He said he +was going home for the holidays and had come to say goodbye for a time. + +Owen had not been doing very well during these last few months, +although he was one of the few lucky ones who had had some small share +of work. Most of the money he earned went for rent, to pay which they +often had to go short of food. Lately his chest had become so bad that +the slightest exertion brought on fits of coughing and breathlessness, +which made it almost impossible to work even when he had the +opportunity; often it was only by an almost superhuman effort of will +that he was able to continue working at all. He contrived to keep up +appearances to a certain extent before Rushton, who, although he knew +that Owen was not so strong as the other men, was inclined to overlook +it so long as he was able to do his share of work, for Owen was a very +useful hand when things were busy. But lately some of the men with +whom he worked began to manifest dissatisfaction at having him for a +mate. When two men are working together, the master expects to see two +men's work done, and if one of the two is not able to do his share it +makes it all the harder for the other. + +He never had the money to go to a doctor to get advice, but earlier in +the winter he had obtained from Rushton a ticket for the local +hospital. Every Saturday throughout the year when the men were paid +they were expected to put a penny or twopence in the hospital box. +Contributions were obtained in this way from every firm and workshop in +the town. The masters periodically handed these boxes over to the +hospital authorities and received in return some tickets which they +gave to anyone who needed and asked for them. The employer had to fill +in the ticket or application form with the name and address of the +applicant, and to certify that in his opinion the individual was a +deserving case, 'suitable to receive this charity'. In common with the +majority of workmen, Owen had a sort of horror of going for advice to +this hospital, but he was so ill that he stifled his pride and went. +It happened that it turned out to be more expensive than going to a +private doctor, for he had to be at the hospital at a certain hour on a +particular morning. To do this he had to stay away from work. The +medicine they prescribed and which he had to buy did him no good, for +the truth was that it was not medicine that he--like thousands of +others--needed, but proper conditions of life and proper food; things +that had been for years past as much out of his reach as if he had been +dying alone in the middle of a desert. + +Occasionally Nora contrived--by going without some other necessary--to +buy him a bottle of one of the many much-advertised medicines; but +although some of these things were good she was not able to buy enough +for him to derive any benefit from them. + +Although he was often seized with a kind of terror of the future--of +being unable to work--he fought against these feelings and tried to +believe that when the weather became warmer he would be all right once +more. + +When Barrington came in Owen was sitting in a deck-chair by the fire in +the sitting-room. He had been to work that day with Harlow, washing off +the ceilings and stripping the old paper from the walls of two rooms in +Rushton's home, and he looked very haggard and exhausted. + +'I have never told you before,' said Barrington, after they had been +talking for a while, 'but I suppose you have guessed that I did not +work for Rushton because I needed to do so in order to live. I just +wanted to see things for myself; to see life as it is lived by the +majority. My father is a wealthy man. He doesn't approve of my +opinions, but at same time he does not interfere with me for holding +them, and I have a fairly liberal allowance which I spent in my own +way. I'm going to pass Christmas with my own people, but in the spring +I intend to fit out a Socialist Van, and then I shall come back here. +We'll have some of the best speakers in the movement; we'll hold +meetings every night; we'll drench the town with literature, and we'll +start a branch of the party.' + +Owen's eye kindled and his pale face flushed. + +'I shall be able to do something to advertise the meetings,' he said. +For instance, I could paint some posters and placards.' + +'And I can help to give away handbills,' chimed in Frankie, looking up +from the floor, where he was seated working the railway. 'I know a lot +of boys who'll come along with me to put 'em under the doors as well.' + +They were in the sitting-room and the door was shut. Mrs Owen was in +the next room with Ruth. While the two men were talking the front-door +bell was heard to ring and Frankie ran out to see who it was, closing +the door after him. Barrington and Owen continued their conversation, +and from time to time they could hear a low murmur of voices from the +adjoining room. After a little while they heard some one go out by the +front door, and almost immediately afterward Frankie--wild with +excitement, burst into the room, crying out: + +'Dad and Mr Barrington! Three cheers!' And he began capering +gleefully about the room, evidently transported with joy. + +'What are the cheers to be for?' inquired Barrington, rather mystified +by this extraordinary conduct. + +'Mr Easton came with Freddie to see Mrs Easton, and she's gone home +again with them,' replied Freddie, 'and--she's given the baby to us for +a Christmas box!' + +Barrington was already familiar with the fact of Easton's separation +from his wife, and Owen now told him the Story of their reconciliation. + +Barrington took his leave shortly afterwards. His train left at eight; +it was already nearly half past seven, and he said he had a letter to +write. Nora brought the baby in to show him before he went, and then +she helped Frankie to put on his overcoat, for Barrington had requested +that the boy might be permitted to go a little way with him. + +There was a stationer's shop at the end of the street. He went in here +and bought a sheet of notepaper and an envelope, and, having borrowed +the pen and ink, wrote a letter which he enclosed in the envelope with +the two other pieces that he took out of his pocketbook. Having +addressed the letter he came out of the shop; Frankie was waiting for +him outside. He gave the letter to the boy. + +'I want you to take this straight home and give it to your dad. I +don't want you to stop to play or even to speak to anyone till you get +home.' + +'All right,' replied Frankie. 'I won't stop running all the way.' + +Barrington hesitated and looked at his watch. 'I think I have time to +go back with you as far as your front door,' he said, 'then I shall be +quite sure you haven't lost it.' + +They accordingly retraced their steps and in a few minutes reached the +entrance to the house. Barrington opened the door and stood for a +moment in the hall watching Frankie ascend the stairs. + +'Will your train cross over the bridge?' inquired the boy, pausing and +looking over the banisters. + +'Yes. Why?' + +'Because we can see the bridge from our front-room window, and if you +were to wave your handkerchief as your train goes over the bridge, we +could wave back.' + +'All right. I'll do so. Goodbye.' + +'Goodbye.' + +Barrington waited till he heard Frankie open and close the door of +Owen's flat, and then he hurried away. When he gained the main road he +heard the sound of singing and saw a crowd at the corner of one of the +side-streets. As he drew near he perceived that it was a religious +meeting. + +There was a lighted lamp on a standard in the centre of the crowd and +on the glass of this lamp was painted: 'Be not deceived: God is not +mocked.' + +Mr Rushton was preaching in the centre of the ring. He said that they +had come hout there that evening to tell the Glad Tidings of Great Joy +to hall those dear people that he saw standing around. The members of +the Shining Light Chapel--to which he himself belonged--was the +organizers of that meeting but it was not a sectarian meeting, for he +was 'appy to say that several members of other denominations was there +co-operating with them in the good work. As he continued his address, +Rushton repeatedly referred to the individuals who composed the crowd +as his 'Brothers and Sisters' and, strange to say, nobody laughed. + +Barrington looked round upon the 'Brothers': Mr Sweater, resplendent in +a new silk hat of the latest fashion, and a fur-trimmed overcoat. The +Rev. Mr Bosher, Vicar of the Church of the Whited Sepulchre, Mr +Grinder--one of the churchwardens at the same place of alleged +worship--both dressed in broadcloth and fine linen and glossy silk +hats, while their general appearance testified to the fact that they +had fared sumptuously for many days. Mr Didlum, Mrs Starvem, Mr +Dauber, Mr Botchit, Mr Smeeriton, and Mr Leavit. + +And in the midst was the Rev. John Starr, doing the work for which he +was paid. + +As he stood there in the forefront of this company, there was nothing +in his refined and comely exterior to indicate that his real function +was to pander to and flatter them; to invest with an air of +respectability and rectitude the abominably selfish lives of the gang +of swindlers, slave-drivers and petty tyrants who formed the majority +of the congregation of the Shining Light Chapel. + +He was doing the work for which he was paid. By the mere fact of his +presence there, condoning and justifying the crimes of these typical +representatives of that despicable class whose greed and inhumanity +have made the earth into a hell. + +There was also a number of 'respectable', well-dressed people who +looked as if they could do with a good meal, and a couple of shabbily +dressed, poverty-stricken-looking individuals who seemed rather out of +place in the glittering throng. + +The remainder of the Brothers consisted of half-starved, pale-faced +working men and women, most of them dressed in other people's cast-off +clothing, and with broken, patched-up, leaky boots on their feet. + +Rushton having concluded his address, Didlum stepped forward to give +out the words of the hymn the former had quoted at the conclusion of +his remarks: + + + 'Oh, come and jine this 'oly band, + And hon to glory go.' + +Strange and incredible as it may appear to the reader, although none of +them ever did any of the things Jesus said, the people who were +conducting this meeting had the effrontery to claim to be followers of +Christ--Christians! + +Jesus said: 'Lay not up for yourselves treasure upon earth', 'Love not +the world nor the things of the world', 'Woe unto you that are rich--it +is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich +man to enter the kingdom of heaven.' Yet all these self-styled +'Followers' of Christ made the accumulation of money the principal +business of their lives. + +Jesus said: 'Be ye not called masters; for they bind heavy burdens and +grievous to be borne, and lay them on men's shoulders, but they +themselves will not touch them with one of their fingers. For one is +your master, even Christ, and ye are all brethren.' But nearly all +these alleged followers of the humble Workman of Nazareth claimed to be +other people's masters or mistresses. And as for being all brethren, +whilst most of these were arrayed in broadcloth and fine linen and +fared sumptuously every day, they knew that all around them thousands +of those they hypocritically called their 'brethren', men, women and +little children, were slowly perishing of hunger and cold; and we have +already seen how much brotherhood existed between Sweater and Rushton +and the miserable, half-starved wretches in their employment. + +Whenever they were asked why they did not practise the things Jesus +preached, they replied that it is impossible to do so! They did not +seem to realize that when they said this they were saying, in effect, +that Jesus taught an impracticable religion; and they appeared to +forget that Jesus said, 'Wherefore call ye me Lord, Lord, when ye do +not the things I say?...' 'Whosoever heareth these sayings of mine and +doeth them not, shall be likened to a foolish man who built his house +upon the sand.' + +But although none of these self-styled 'Followers' of Christ, ever did +the things that Jesus said, they talked a great deal about them, and +sang hymns, and for a pretence made long prayers, and came out here to +exhort those who were still in darkness to forsake their evil ways. And +they procured this lantern and wrote a text upon it: 'Be not deceived, +God is not mocked.' + +They stigmatized as 'infidels' all those who differed from them, +forgetting that the only real infidels are those who are systematically +false and unfaithful to the Master they pretend to love and serve. + +Grinder, having a slight cold, had not spoken this evening, but several +other infidels, including Sweater, Didlum, Bosher, and Starr, had +addressed the meeting, making a special appeal to the working people, +of whom the majority of the crowd was composed, to give up all the vain +pleasures of the world in which they at present indulged, and, as +Rushton had eloquently put it at the close of his remarks: + + 'Come and jine this 'Oly band and hon to glory go!' + +As Didlum finished reading out the words, the lady at the harmonium +struck up the tune of the hymns, and the disciples all joined in the +singing: + + 'Oh, come and join this 'oly band and hon to glory go.' + +During the singing certain of the disciples went about amongst the +crowd distributing tracts. Presently one of them offered one to +Barrington and as the latter looked at the man he saw that it was +Slyme, who also recognized him at the same instant and greeted him by +name. Barrington made no reply except to decline the tract: + +'I don't want that--from you,' he said contemptuously. + +Slyme turned red. 'Oh, I know what you're thinking of,' he said after +a pause and speaking in an injured tone; 'but you shouldn't judge +anyone too hard. It wasn't only my fault, and you don't know 'ow much +I've suffered for it. If it 'adn't been for the Lord, I believe I +should 'ave drownded myself.' + +Barrington made no answer and Slyme slunk off, and when the hymn was +finished Brother Sweater stood forth and gave all those present a +hearty invitation to attend the services to be held during the ensuing +week at the Chapel of the Shining Light. He invited them there +specially, of course, because it was the place with which he was +himself connected, but he entreated and begged of them even if they +would not come there to go Somewhere; there were plenty of other places +of worship in the town; in fact, there was one at the corner of nearly +every street. Those who did not fancy the services at the Shining +Light could go to the Church of the Whited Sepulchre, but he really did +hope that all those dear people whom he saw standing round would go +Somewhere. + +A short prayer from Bosher closed the meeting, and now the reason for +the presence of the two poverty-stricken-looking shabbily dressed +disciples was made manifest, for while the better dressed and therefore +more respectable Brothers were shaking hands with and grinning at each +other or hovering round the two clergymen and Mr Sweater, these two +poor wretches carried away the harmonium and the lantern, together with +the hymn books and what remained of the tracts. As Barrington hurried +off to catch the train one of the 'Followers' gave him a card which he +read by the light of a street lamp-- + + Come and join the Brotherhood + at the Shining Light Chapel + PSA + Every Sunday at 3 o'clock. + Let Brotherly Love Continue. + 'Oh come and join this Holy Band + and on to Glory go.' + +Barrington thought he would, rather go to hell--if there were such a +place--with some decent people, than share 'glory' with a crew like +this. + + + +Nora sat sewing by the fireside in the front room, with the baby asleep +in her lap. Owen was reclining in the deck-chair opposite. They had +both been rather silent and thoughtful since Barrington's departure. +It was mainly by their efforts that the reconciliation between Easton +and Ruth had been effected and they had been so desirous of +accomplishing that result that they had not given much thought to their +own position. + +'I feel that I could not bear to part with her for anything now,' said +Nora at last breaking the long silence, 'and Frankie is so fond of her +too. But all the same I can't feel happy about it when I think how ill +you are.' + +'Oh, I shall be all right when the weather gets a little warmer,' said +Owen, affecting a cheerfulness he did not feel. 'We have always pulled +through somehow or other; the poor little thing is not going to make +much difference, and she'll be as well off with us as she would have +been if Ruth had not gone back.' + +As he spoke he leaned over and touched the hand of the sleeping child +and the little fingers closed round one of his with a clutch that sent +a thrill all through him. As he looked at this little helpless, +dependent creature, he realized with a kind of thankfulness that he +would never have the heart to carry out the dreadful project he had +sometimes entertained in hours of despondency. + +'We've always got through somehow or other,' he repeated, 'and we'll do +so still.' + +Presently they heard Frankie's footsteps ascending the stairs and a +moment afterwards the boy entered the room. + +'We have to look out of the window and wave to Mr Barrington when his +train goes over the bridge,' he cried breathlessly. 'And he's sent +this letter. Open the window, quick, Dad, or it may be too late.' + +'There's plenty of time yet,' replied Owen, smiling at the boy's +impetuosity. 'Nearly twenty minutes. We don't want the window open +all that time. It's only a quarter to eight by our clock now, and +that's five minutes fast.' + +However, so as to make quite certain that the train should not run past +unnoticed, Frankie pulled up the blind and, rubbing the steam off the +glass, took up his station at the window to watch for its coming, while +Owen opened the letter: + +'Dear Owen, + +'Enclosed you will find two bank-notes, one for ten pounds and the +other for five. The first I beg you will accept from me for yourself +in the same spirit that I offer it, and as I would accept it from you +if our positions were reversed. If I were in need, I know that you +would willingly share with me whatever you had and I could not hurt you +by refusing. The other note I want you to change tomorrow morning. +Give three pounds of it to Mrs Linden and the remainder to Bert White's +mother. + +'Wishing you all a happy Xmas and hoping to find you well and eager for +the fray when I come back in the spring, + + 'Yours for the cause, + + 'George Barrington.' + +Owen read it over two or three times before he could properly +understand it and then, without a word of comment--for he could not +have spoken at that moment to save his life--he passed it to Nora, who +felt, as she read it in her turn, as if a great burden had been lifted +from her heart. All the undefined terror of the future faded away as +she thought of all this small piece of paper made possible. + +Meanwhile, Frankie, at the window, was straining his eyes in the +direction of the station. + +'Don't you think we'd better have the window open now, Dad?' he said at +last as the clock struck eight. 'The steam keeps coming on the glass +as fast as I wipe it off and I can't see out properly. I'm sure it's +nearly time now; p'raps our clock isn't as fast as you think it is.' + +'All right, we'll have it open now, so as to be on the safe side,' said +Owen as he stood up and raised the sash, and Nora, having wrapped the +child up in a shawl, joined them at the window. + +'It can't be much longer now, you know,' said Frankie. 'The line's +clear. They turned the red light off the signal just before you opened +the window.' + +In a very few minutes they heard the whistle of the locomotive as it +drew out of the station, then, an instant before the engine itself came +into sight round the bend, the brightly polished rails were +illuminated, shining like burnished gold in the glare of its headlight; +a few seconds afterwards the train emerged into view, gathering speed +as it came along the short stretch of straight way, and a moment later +it thundered across the bridge. It was too far away to recognize his +face, but they saw someone looking out of a carriage window waving a +handkerchief, and they knew it was Barrington as they waved theirs in +return. Soon there remained nothing visible of the train except the +lights at the rear of the guard's van, and presently even those +vanished into the surrounding darkness. + +The lofty window at which they were standing overlooked several of the +adjacent streets and a great part of the town. On the other side of the +road were several empty houses, bristling with different house agents' +advertisement boards and bills. About twenty yards away, the shop +formerly tenanted by Mr Smallman, the grocer, who had become bankrupt +two or three months previously, was also plastered with similar +decorations. A little further on, at the opposite corner, were the +premises of the Monopole Provision Stores, where brilliant lights were +just being extinguished, for they, like most of the other shops, were +closing their premises for the night, and the streets took on a more +cheerless air as one after another their lights disappeared. + +It had been a fine day, and during the earlier part of the evening the +moon, nearly at the full, had been shining in a clear and starry sky; +but a strong north-east wind had sprung up within the last hour; the +weather had become bitterly cold and the stars were rapidly being +concealed from view by the dense banks of clouds that were slowly +accumulating overhead. + +As they remained at the window looking out over this scene for a few +minutes after the train had passed out of sight, it seemed to Owen that +the gathering darkness was as a curtain that concealed from view the +Infamy existing beyond. In every country, myriads of armed men waiting +for their masters to give them the signal to fall upon and rend each +other like wild beasts. All around was a state of dreadful anarchy; +abundant riches, luxury, vice, hypocrisy, poverty, starvation, and +crime. Men literally fighting with each other for the privilege of +working for their bread, and little children crying with hunger and +cold and slowly perishing of want. + +The gloomy shadows enshrouding the streets, concealing for the time +their grey and mournful air of poverty and hidden suffering, and the +black masses of cloud gathering so menacingly in the tempestuous sky, +seemed typical of the Nemesis which was overtaking the Capitalist +System. That atrocious system which, having attained to the fullest +measure of detestable injustice and cruelty, was now fast crumbling +into ruin, inevitably doomed to be overwhelmed because it was all so +wicked and abominable, inevitably doomed to sink under the blight and +curse of senseless and unprofitable selfishness out of existence for +ever, its memory universally execrated and abhorred. + +But from these ruins was surely growing the glorious fabric of the +Co-operative Commonwealth. Mankind, awaking from the long night of +bondage and mourning and arising from the dust wherein they had lain +prone so long, were at last looking upward to the light that was riving +asunder and dissolving the dark clouds which had so long concealed from +them the face of heaven. The light that will shine upon the world wide +Fatherland and illumine the gilded domes and glittering pinnacles of +the beautiful cities of the future, where men shall dwell together in +true brotherhood and goodwill and joy. The Golden Light that will be +diffused throughout all the happy world from the rays of the risen sun +of Socialism. + + + +Appendix + +Mugsborough + + +Mugsborough was a town of about eighty thousand inhabitants, about two +hundred miles from London. It was built in a verdant valley. Looking +west, north or east from the vicinity of the fountain on the Grand +Parade in the centre of the town, one saw a succession of pine-clad +hills. To the south, as far as the eye could see, stretched a vast, +cultivated plain that extended to the south coast, one hundred miles +away. The climate was supposed to be cool in summer and mild in winter. + +The town proper nestled in the valley: to the west, the most beautiful +and sheltered part was the suburb of Irene: here were the homes of the +wealthy residents and prosperous tradespeople, and numerous +boarding-houses for the accommodation of well-to-do visitors. East, +the town extended up the to the top of the hill and down the +other side to the suburb of Windley, where the majority of the working +classes lived. + +Years ago, when the facilities for foreign travel were fewer and more +costly, Mugsborough was a favourite resort of the upper classes, but of +late years most of these patriots have adopted the practice of going on +the Continent to spend the money they obtain from the working people of +England. However, Mugsborough still retained some semblance of +prosperity. Summer or winter the place was usually fairly full of what +were called good-class visitors, either holidaymakers or invalids. The +Grand Parade was generally crowded with well-dressed people and +carriages. The shops appeared to be well-patronized and at the time of +our story an air of prosperity pervaded the town. But this fair +outward appearance was deceitful. The town was really a vast whited +sepulchre; for notwithstanding the natural advantages of the place the +majority of the inhabitants existed in a state of perpetual poverty +which in many cases bordered on destitution. One of the reasons for +this was that a great part of the incomes of the tradespeople and +boarding-house-keepers and about a third of the wages of the working +classes were paid away as rent and rates. + +For years the Corporation had been borrowing money for necessary public +works and improvements, and as the indebtedness of the town increased +the rates rose in proportion, because the only works and services +undertaken by the Council were such as did not yield revenue. Every +public service capable of returning direct profit was in the hands of +private companies, and the shares of the private companies were in the +hands of the members of the Corporation, and the members of the +Corporation were in the hands of the four most able and intellectual of +their number, Councillors Sweater, Rushton, Didlum and Grinder, each of +whom was a director of one or more of the numerous companies which +battened on the town. + +The Tramway Company, the Water Works Company, the Public Baths Company, +the Winter Gardens Company, the Grand Hotel Company and numerous +others. There was, however, one Company in which Sweater, Rushton, +Didlum and Grinder had no shares, and that was the Gas Company, the +oldest and most flourishing of them all. This institution had grown +with the place; most of the original promoters were dead, and the +greater number of the present shareholders were non-residents; although +they lived on the town, they did not live in it. + +The profits made by this Company were so great that, being prevented by +law from paying a larger dividend than ten percent, they frequently +found it a difficult matter to decide what to do with the money. They +paid the Directors and principal officials--themselves shareholders, of +course--enormous salaries. They built and furnished costly and +luxurious offices and gave the rest to the shareholders in the form of +Bonuses. + +There was one way in which the Company might have used some of the +profits: it might have granted shorter hours and higher wages to the +workmen whose health was destroyed and whose lives were shortened by +the terrible labour of the retort-houses and the limesheds; but of +course none of the directors or shareholders ever thought of doing +that. It was not the business of the Company to concern itself about +them. + +Years ago, when it might have been done for a comparatively small +amount, some hare-brained Socialists suggested that the town should buy +the Gas Works, but the project was wrecked by the inhabitants, upon +whom the mere mention of the word Socialist had the same effect that +the sight of a red rag is popularly supposed to have on a bull. + +Of course, even now it was still possible to buy out the Company, but +it was supposed that it would cost so much that it was generally +considered to be impracticable. + +Although they declined to buy the Gas works, the people of Mugsborough +had to buy the gas. The amount paid by the municipality to the Company +for the public lighting of the town loomed large in the accounts of the +Council. They managed to get some of their own back by imposing a duty +of two shillings a ton upon coals imported into the Borough, but +although it cost the Gas Works a lot of money for coal dues the Company +in its turn got its own back by increasing the price of gas they sold +to the inhabitants of the town... + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists, by +Robert Tressell + +*** \ No newline at end of file