Original sentence: According to local legend it began centuries ago when a beaten woman ran away from her husband, Tamale.He found her hiding in a tall tree and called to her that if she came down he might beat her.Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom visited in 1974, and a land diving display was prepared for her.The government cancelled the N'gol in 1995 as they believed it had become too commercialised and wanted to revive the ceremony's cultural value.The ritual of the N'gol is an extraordinary event, with real risk to life and limb that bears no more resemblance to bungee jumping than abseiling down a sixty foot (20 m) cliff does to catching a lift down a six story building
Edited sentence: Britain's Queen Elizabeth visited in 1974, and a land diving display was prepared for her.He found her hiding in a tall tree and called to her that if she came down he might beat her—but only a little.It began centuries, perhaps millennia ago, when a beaten woman ran away from her husband, Tamale.No picture can capture the feel of dozens of villagers dancing and stomping the earth during the entire ceremony.No words can express the awe of sitting beneath the tower and listening to the diver's last words—for he knows they may be his last words if the vines break or are too long.The government cancelled the N'gol in 1995; they believed it had become too commercialised and wanted to revive the ceremony's cultural value.The ritual of the N'gol is an extraordinary event, filled with a dignity and mystique—and real risk to life and limb that bears no more resemblance to bungee jumping than abseiling down a sixty foot (20 m) cliff does to catching a lift down a six story building.The story of the N'gol does not portray the extraordinary feeling of power during this event