Original sentence: Cal Poly Pomona is one of the most selective schools in the nation and, along with Cal Poly San Luis Obispo, one of the two most selective schools in the CSU system.In 2005, 17,252 prospective freshmen applied to Cal Poly for entrance in Fall 2006, with 4,121 applicants being accepted—a 24% acceptance rate.This makes Cal Poly Pomona the university with the lowest acceptance rate in both the University of California and the California State University systems,  followed by Berkeley at 27%, UCLA at 27%, UC San Diego at 42%, and Cal Poly San Luis Obispo at 37%
Edited sentence: Cal Poly Pomona is a low tier, selective university in terms of admissions.In 2007, approximately 22,000 prospective freshmen applied to Cal Poly for entrance in Fall 2007, with approximately 10,000 applicants being accepted—a 45% acceptance rate Cal Poly Pomona admissions is fairly easy compared to higher tier, more selective universities such as Berkeley at 27%, UCLA at 27%, UC San Diego at 42%, and Cal Poly San Luis Obispo at 37%