Original sentence: Husband and wife novice kayakers blown offshore late afternoon in high winds.Husband found two days later on nearby Kahoolawe island with a kayak.Husband unable to fight off shark, control bleeding injuries, or hold on to corpse due to rough ocean conditions.Wife capsized repeatedly in rough waters, became unable get back onto kayak due to fatigue, and was attacked at dusk by "large shark with blunt head" while holding on, treading water.Wife's body and second kayak never recovered
Edited sentence: Double kayak capsized repeatedly in rough waters, wife became unable get back onto kayak due to fatigue.Her arm was bitten off at dusk by a "large shark".Husband and wife novice kayakers were blown offshore late afternoon in high winds.Husband found two days later on nearby Kahoolawe island with the kayak, paddles and life jacket.Husband was unable to fight off the shark, control bleeding of the injury, or keep corpse on the kayak due to ocean conditions.Wife's body never recovered