Original sentence: Magneto however finds that many of his recruits are unresponsive to his ideas and approach, with some asking for the return of much more humane Xorn and others doubtful that Magneto has truly returned, much to his chagrin
Edited sentence: Magneto begins acting with uncharacteristic clumsiness and stupidity, and finds that many of his recruits are unresponsive to his ideas and approach, with some asking for the return of much more humane Xorn and others doubtful that Magneto has truly returned