Original sentence: Although many people believe the minorities are responsible for their inability to find scholarships, studies have shown that Caucasians receive 72 percent of all scholarships while their minority counterparts only receive 28 percent.It has become more prevalent today that scholarships are misconceived to have a discriminatory quality to them.The misconceptions have led many people, including Colby Bohannan, to create “Caucasians Only” scholarships in hopes of bringing equality to higher education.These beliefs are known to come from college students themselves who have been affected by their failures at obtaining adequate financial aid.These high expectations lead to disappointing results, and many people tend to find someone else to blame for their faults
Edited sentence: Although not altogether the complete reason for failures of many to receive scholarships, it has been noticed by many that the outlines for student-specific scholarships tend to display patterns of acceptance that parallel more discriminatory and specific guidelines.Despite the seemingly prejudiced nature of certain student-specific scholarships, it is believed that Caucasians receive 72 percent of all scholarships while their minority counterparts only receive 28 percent.It has become more prevalent today that a very rare amount of scholarships are noted to have a discriminatory quality to them.Since a small number of scholarship programs are available only to those of a certain ethnicity, religion, or gender, there is a sense of unjust discrimination towards college-bound applicants.While the notion that a set amount of financial aid is only available to those of a certain race or gender or religion does reflect the concept of inequality and discrimination, it is evident that the majority of scholarship programs do not require such discriminatory information