Original sentence: The Apollo 100 version was however credited to Tom Parker.The recording of "Joy" as performed by Apollo 100 is a nearly note-for-note remake of the pop music arrangement by Clive Scott of "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring" as recorded by the British band Jigsaw on their 1970 debut album Letherslade Farm.Tom Parker was an arranger responsible for most of the arrangements from the Young Blood catalogue, such as the Top 20 American hit "Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep" and a number of Don Fardon's recordings
Edited sentence: The recording of "Joy" as performed by Apollo 100 is a nearly note-for-note remake of the arrangement of "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring" (but with modern pop music flourishes like percussion, electric guitar and bass) as recorded by the British band Jigsaw on their 1970 debut album Letherslade Farm.Tom Parker was an accomplished arranger responsible for most of the successful arrangements from the Young Blood catalogue, such as the Top 20 American hit "Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep" and a number of Don Fardon's recordings