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Roger Corman has enjoyed his shares of cinematic infamy in his illustrious low-budget career, spanning over 300 movies. While few (if any) would call him great, his films' obscure connections to underground culture (via reference, tribute, or influence) have ensured him a warped legacy of sorts. Throughout his career, he has also developed a bad habit of remaking his own films ("Piranha", "Humanoids from the Deep", "The Black Scorpion", etc.), without improving on them in the slightest. "Raptor", "written" and "directed" by "Jay Andrews" (Jim Wynorski, the man behind one of my favorite cinematic guilty pleasures, "Chopping Mall") takes that practice to a disturbing new low regarding Corman's mid-'90s "Carnosaur" trilogy.
Wynorski's credits are in quotes because "Raptor" isn't a tribute to the "Carnosaur" films, and not even a remake. "Raptor" IS the "Carnosaur" films, or at least the film's dinosaur-induced death scenes, haphazardly spliced together with trace elements of the original plot and some newly shot scenes (many of which consist of "dino's eye view" shots in a lame attempt to make the inserted scenes look less obvious). The "new" material was written around the footage, instead of vice versa, and is totally unremarkable, with huge gaps of logic (e.g. two separate teams are sent in by the military simply so footage from parts 2 and 3, where the soldiers had different uniforms, could be included), which is amazing considering how little logic plays into any of the "Carnosaur" films already. The actors' lack of any feeling in their characters (though in fairness, any character dimension is only presented in the script once, maybe twice) brings to mind the terribly wooden acting in 1950's b-films, and it certainly doesn't make anything between the ripped-off attack scenes worth watching. Even more embarrassing for the actors of the new scenes is when there is an obvious discrepancy in the physical build between the new actor and the actor in the original scene. When the only scene evoking any response in a film is the oldest trick in the horror book, the "spring-loaded animal", something is seriously wrong.
As it stands, this is a despicable practice in two b-grade figures (who need not worry about ruining their reputations, because they haven't got one) ripping off their own material, for the cheapest and quickest of dirty tricks, simply because they can (why else would anyone feel possessed to rip off a series meant to be a rip off of the "Jurassic Park" series?). There isn't much more I can say other than that this film carries my very highest recommendations AGAINST viewing; the only good thing about it (besides gazing at Melissa Braselle's navel) is that now I don't have to see any of the "Carnosaur" movies.


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So bad, it's entertaining, especially during cocktail hour, and believe me, you'll need a beer, a drink, or whatever to get through this turkey. Where do they get the financial backing for such paint-by-the-numbers "horror" flicks? The fun in this movie is predicting which characters will get eaten and in what order, and trashing the so-called "uniforms" the "military" jokers wear. The raptors, by the way, are not the same raptors we met in "Jurassic Park," but a cousin species. (Sorry, no spoilers here. You'll have to watch it to find out for yourself) Don't expect the plot to make sense, simple as it is, just go along for the ride. You could make it a game... take another drink each time you hear a certain sound... or better yet, every time someone gets crunched by a "raptor." With a little luck, you won't even remember having seen this "C-grade" made-for-TV movie!


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The only reason there is a question mark in parenthesis is NOT because I haven't seen every film released in 2001 thus far. It's because this film was only made PARTLY in 2001. The rest of it was stolen from Roger Corman's OTHER dinosaur films, Carnosaur 1-3.
I have a confession to make. "Carnosaur 2" is perhaps one of my favorite B-movies. It borrows so much from James Cameron's "Aliens" it's not even funny. But I love it. I can't explain exactly why. It just WORKS for me. I liked the sets, I liked the cinematography, I liked how they borrowed from "Aliens". It's all a bit ironic that Cameron at one point was an understudy of Corman's, with films like "Battle Beyond the Stars" (1980).
I own the Carnosaur trilogy on DVD, and the most I can say for part one is that it has moments. The most I can say for the third is that it took me five years to find it watchable.
Now we have "Raptor," which does NOT continue that series. Instead, it borrows ENTIRE scenes from the Carnosaur Trilogy and BUILDS a movie around it. And somehow Roger Corman was able to get Eric Roberts and Corbin Bernsen to do it. Now, I'm not saying either Roberts or Bernsen are at any kind of career high. But they were both at one point what could be called RESPECTABLE actors. Not here. Sure, actors react to effects they won't even see while filming all the time. Here, however, they are reacting to mismatched footage from films that are between five and eight years old. There's even a sherrif whose costume was modeled directly after a character in "Carnosaur 1." Apparently it made too much sense to get the original guy back.
When "Raptor" was announced I was a wee bit excited. I was however disappointed when Corman said that they'd be using the old dinosaur models from "Carnosaur." Apparently Corman decided after this interview was conducted that he wouldn't even do that. And its not that he couldn't find an FX crew to do it. The script for this was clearly written keeping in mind that the story had to be built around pre-existing stock footage.
Don't compare this to Ed Wood. Ed did better than this. At least he only used the stock footage of Bela once, in one film. There are ways of incorporating stock footage into a movie, and "Raptor" takes this frowned-upon technique to a new low. Even if you liked "Carnosaur 3: Primal Species," stay away from "Raptor."


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I am a huge Eric Roberts fan, I collect his movies and so far has get to 60. But I´m honest to say that sometimes he really makes awful movies. But hey that´s why I like him - he is entertaining.
But this one has to take the price, I can´t stop wonder why. Somehow they managed to get Eric and also Corbin Bernsen to the picture.
While Bernsen is plain awful (I really don´t like him), Roberts manage to be the best thing in the movie (and that doesn´t mean much). He practically do it on routine basis.
The female lead (Brasselle) looks like a plastic doll and acts like one to. And Tim Abell and his crew looks like action-man plastic dolls and acts like those to.
The plot is really embarrasing. I haven´t seen any of the Carnosaur movies so I can´t recall on the footage that has been added from there, but it explains some things. But still there are holes huge as craters in the plot.
SPOILERS ALERT
The first attacks are located outside the laboratory in the woods nearby. But at the end they blow the whole laboratory in pieces and just relax that everything is over, but they forgot about the ones outside??????
When the helicopter pilot is eaten alive I wonder how she couldn´t notice a T-rex climbing into the chopper????
The guys in orange overalls is my favourite - what are they doing, out for a jogging round or what??
Of course there are a B-movie standard sex-scene with silicon titties involved too. This time it´s Lorissa McComas that greets us. I don´t have any problem with that (she looks awful) but to look at a guy squeezing tits and being on the verge of climax for 8!!!! minutes is just tooo long.
Shame on you all (including Eric Roberts) - Now I look forward to watch Con Games (I wonder???)


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This film was really terrible.
However , it's worth seeing , as it features the worlds most unnecessarily extended sex scene ever. I mean , this thing went on for about 7 - 8 minutes (repeating the same 'moves' over and over), thats almost 10 % of the whole film! I haven't laughed as hard as I laughed at that for a long time.
There were some seriously strange and pointless goings on in this film, but the one that I found funniest was when (for no reason whatsoever) a helicopter lands and 5 or 6 guys in orange suits run in to the complex near the end. 2 minutes later they run out again. What the hell was that for?? Also , the tiny white forklift that magically changed into a huge yellow digger was pretty classic. I'm led to beleive that this is because they used footage from the 'carnosaur' trilogy to patch up this absolute donkey. I'm gonna have to see those now!
The film is worth watching for a laugh or two , but if you dont find bad movies funny, stay away!


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This movie is sad. According to my fellow IMDb users, (*SPOILER*) RAPTOR uses stock footage from the Carnotaur films. Well, since I have not seen the Carnotaur movies, I cannot say. But, I do notice some pretty bad editing and even worse acting. This movie is one big steaming pile of s***. It makes absolutely no sense. Here is this thing that calls itself a PLOT: Mad scientist re-creates raptors. Raptors kill people. Sheriff investigates. *SPOILER* (although I don't know what it is that I'm spoiling) Sheriff catches on to mad doctor's plans. Army guys are sent in and raptors start killing army guys. Raptors. Yeah, right. I could make a clay figure that looks more real. The FX are the cheapest ever used in a movie. There is a lot of gore. Cheap gore. It doesn't even look real. I will agree with another person who rated this movie that the only thing this movie has going for it is the fact that it ends. There are about two seconds of originality in this film. And that only comes from when the sheriff is talking to some tax agent on the phone about his electric bill or something. This idea has been used in about 100,000 other movies with 100,000 different names. Overall, I'm gonna give RAPTOR 1/5 just because it ended.


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On the bright side, it ended. That's the only thing this movie has going for it, of course.
This is the worst movie I have ever seen, and I've seen some bad ones. This movie is actually so horrible, I went and changed my rating for Children of the Living Dead to a 2 just for not being Raptor.
Official one-liner rating: "Come with me to another movie if you want to live."


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The worst film ever, with characters from Carnosaur 1-3 inserted merely to fall to the same demise that they had in the first film, so that footage and special effects could be reused.
Stay away from this debacle.
Corman is ruining his legacy. He made and produced some amazing films - but that era ended with Carnosaur being his last "creative in its badness" film.


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**********SPOILER ALERT***************
If you happen to like JURASSIC PARK 1, 2, or 3:
If you happen to appreciate really bad movies for their sheer entertainment value if not for their quality (case in point-John Carpenter's DARK STAR-highly recommended)
If you happen to like movies about dinosaurs in general-
THEN STAY AWAY FROM THIS CINEMATIC CRAPSTERPIECE!
The shameless use of stock footage from CARNOSAUR 1 & 2 make up most of this miserable attempt at a dino/slasher flick- Take the scene, for instance, where the security guard meets his doom at the jaws of the Alpha T-Rex. For some reason, he drops about 50 pounds and appears 10 years younger. Why is that? Simply because this scene was lifted directly from CARNOSAUR, which was a crummy flick to begin with.
The ending was a carbon copy of CARNOSAUR 2, for those unfortunate enough to have sat through that straight-to-video loser. Again, we see Mr. Rex do battle against a bulldozer-which alternates as a forklift truck-through the miracle of -ta-daa!- stock footage from the aforementioned CARNOSAUR 1 & 2. Of course, the ending is exactly the same-the beast falls to his death just as the complex goes up in flames.
A real insult to anyone's intelligence.
But it's still better than watching the ROSIE O' DONNEL SHOW.
Rating: 1/2* out of *****



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Oy vey... Jurrasic Park got Corman-ized. As usual the plot is wafer thin, from 1 foot tall dinosaurs that weigh 150 pounds and leave tracks bigger than they are, to inexplicable science which uses lasers to keep the dinosaurs in check and poultry trucks which have chickens loose in cages large enough for big dogs (I've seen chicken trucks they are all in cages the size of shoe boxes). And all that is in the first 15 minutes of this disaster of a film. All the male actors are imbeciles (thinking a grizzly might be loose in the desert, constantly dropping items to give the raptor an easy kill) and the female actors all look like they just came from a modeling shoot for Fredrick's of Hollywood. The raptor itself is the worst thing since the Hobgoblins (from the movie of the same name), it looks like they had a hand puppet version and a plastic model for the "motion" shots. If you want a good movie to sit around and heckle MST3K style, this is gold. If you want competent film making and good acting... don't watch a Roger Corman film. Acting gets a 4 out 10, some of the players upon this stage did try. Story gets a 2 out of 10, it reads like a drunken storytelling session gone bad. Special effects gets a 2 out of 10, I've seen worse, but not many.


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This movie is an abortive, stillborn attempt to stitch together several bad movies and make some sort of extra-bad movie. It fails at even this, since there's way too much "plot", and not nearly enough goofy puppets and ridiculous gore. Seriously, the puppets are sweet, and the guys in suits crack me up pretty good. The performances are C-grade at best and lame throughout, with special props to the Spec-Ops guy who spoke some sort of bizarre East Coast/Venusian dialect that was almost impossible to decipher. Not that you really care what he says, as only the curse words are distinct. Cinematographically, it's non-offensive, pretty much what you'd expect from low-rent straight-to-video offal (just like the script). The fact that New Concorde used footage from the "Carnosaur" films IS offensive, and quite confusing. For shame, New Concorde. For shame. "Carnosaur" is one of my favorite terrible movies, and they somehow screwed it up and made it nigh unwatchable. See the "Carnosaur" films if you want to see shoestring dinosaur mayhem.
I give it one star because I am so fond of the movies it steals from, and also because the scale doesn't have a zero.


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The biggest and most disconcerting things of the Raptor movie was ending for the Tyransaurus is identical to Carnosaur except kid in the loader was a bit better acted and action then the adult. The similarities to the Carnosaur movies was rather poor choice in plot line. The only thing that approached good was the beginning with the kids in the jeep. Then the plot went down hill from there. Would have been nice if a different plot had been devised, rather then cloning the earlier movies. The raptor movie should have taken lesson from Jurasic park series in various plots. The only movie that has come close to a good dinosaur movie most recently is Aztec Rex. The repeated scenes as if taken from the Carnosaur movies leaves a person thinking of those movies.


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The defining scene to this movie is when the fat guy quits,but the evil doctor just gives him one more duty,check on the dinosaurs.Keep in mind that he no longer has this job and so is absolutely not getting paid for this.Also keep in mind it's a goddamn dinosaur and the doctor he's supposed to trust is evil and doesn't like him.But he's still like,yeah okay.That just defined the stupidity in this movie.One Melissa Brasselle proves that seriously anyone can bolt on some breasts and be in movies.I can go ride a mountain-bike between them,but hey aside from that the people of Paraguay are very nice.Eric Roberts gives his absolute worst performance so far,there's no adjective to describe how bored he is throughout.Corbin Bernsen saves what there is to save and you start rooting for him,but they have to stick to the formula of course.And I wonder how much your life sucks when you play like,one of the army guys in this one?How low can your acting career go?The special effects are so embarrassingly bad you expect a sign saying "Studio 3" to get into the frame.It's not even honest pulp,it's all taken from "Carnosaur",which even sucked all by itself.And then I wonder why just anyone is allowed to make a movie.


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I bought a DVD collection (9 movies for 10 Euros) where this one was included. It turned out to be the "uncut version" whatever that means. Beside the low average quality and short scenes there was one thing that was really strange - the soft sex scene. It started with a close up of 2 bigger breasts. After around 2 minutes I had an expression on my face which fitted the term "boooooooooooooring!" quite perfectly. 7.5 minutes of not even bouncing concrete like tits (at this point the term breasts is a bad choice) is far beyond from entertainment.
The rest of the movie was more like "people aren't /that/ stupid, are they?"
Lucky me, the DVD was scratched and I got my money back.


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We all know that the world is full of dodgy, rip-off horror films. Some of these can be fun to watch, due to their stupidity, awful effects and iffy dialogue. But Raptor, which could have been in the same league as the equally pointless Carnosaur series, does not even ATTEMPT to have any enjoyment in it. Its so poorly done, it is really unbearable, even if your just watching it with the intentions of having a no-brain day at home. Where do we start? Well... the sets are pretty drab. My old drama group created more realistic stages. The genetics labs look like they are from a university, and it looks equally unbelievable on the outside (Even for cover-up, why would you place yourself near civilisation where people can easily hear the dinosaur roars), whilst the doctors ward just doesn't look believable at all. Next up in the complaints list is the creature effects; well, what can I say? Absolutely pitiful. Also, I think it's worth mentioning, the woman's tits should be mentioned as an effect. Both of the main female characters have so obviously had boob-jobs, and it brings the characters down, being one female is a respected member of police, whilst the other is the sweet, "innocent" daughter of the towns sheriff. The acting, though, is by far the worst tragedy. Eric Roberts can be excused for at least trying a bit to give his role something. Thats where it ends. Corbin Benson should have killed his costume designer for making his lacklustre performance look even more pathetic, whilst the female lead looks SO bored (Though, with this film you could let her off). The other character I'll point out is the daughter, who lets her tits do all the acting in the "raunchy" sex scene (Ten minutes of endless re-run shots of her bouncing on top of some bloke).
All in all, and summed up as one. don't bother, just don't.


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So I was sick with the flu one Saturday and the silver lining was that SciFi Channel was having a marathon of dinosaur movies that day - the "Carnosaur" trilogy, "Pterodactyl," "Raptor Island." Then I flicked ahead on my cable remote to see which movie SciFi placed in its glamorous, Saturday prime-time slot. Some movie I had never heard of before called "Raptor." I was pretty excited. The movie begins with some teens driving around in a jeep, when they get stalked and killed by a Velociraptor. I was like, "Hmmm, that's odd, that looks almost exactly like a scene in "Carnosaur," except it was in the middle of that movie." Then I sat through some really bad acting and then some guy was suckered into walking into an underground research laboratory where he got eaten by a ferocious T-Rex. Now I'm like, "Wait a second, that was also a scene in "Carnosaur." Then, after I saw some scenes blatantly ripped off from "Carnosaur 2", I figured out just what the hell was going on. So basically, Roger Corman & Co. ripped off scenes from the "Carnosaur" trilogy to use as the action scenes, weaved in a basic "dinosaur-runs-amok" plot, and tried to pass it off as an original movie. Shameful. I don't know who I'm more angry at, Roger Corman or SciFi Channel for trying to pass this off as worthy of the prime-time slot. The only reason why this was worth watching to its conclusion was to pick out the actors/actresses who looked like their counterparts in the "Carnosaur" trilogy and guess which scenes would be lifted next. As much as it pains me, being a dinosaur lover, I have no choice but to give this the lowest possible rating because I feel completely ripped off.


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The storyline of this movie is cliché and obviously has been ripped off from Jurassic Park. The filmmakers didn't even try to hide that. It seems as though there was not enough budget to make decent dinosaur-dolls, so instead the viewer sees some robot-like toy-dinos (from a cheap toystore) which move in a very unnatural way. It's funny though, because it's so bad. The acting is almost as unnatural as the dinos are. No one seems really excited to be in this movie (which I totally understand). Especially the last half hour is extremely boring and it's almost impossible to watch it without falling asleep. The one positive comment note I'd like to make about "Raptor" is that it doesn't take a full 90 minutes.


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OK, lets get one thing straight, i love dinosaur movies, even the bad ones. So with this in mind lets proceed. "Raptor" is a truly awful film, in fact its not even a film in its own right as it is cobbled together from bits of "Carnosaur", "Carnosaur 2" & "Primal Species - Carnosaur 3". There is some new footage with Eric Roberts as a sheriff and his busty sidekick running around looking confused, frightened or whatever it is there trying to convey (badly) on the emotional scale but then how can they react to something that was filmed several years earlier. The producers (yes Roger Corman i'm talking about you!) even went to the lengths of hiring 2 people from "Carnosaur" to play bit parts so there grisly death scenes can be reused! So this film is the cheapest of the cheap. Watch the 3 original movies, there no Oscar winners but they have some meritt and entertainment value but avoid "Raptor". Oh, it also has the most pointless sex scene that runs for nearly 10 minutes! Do you think they were trying to pad out the running time?


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This movie doesn't even deserve a 1/10 This movie was a scam.
I swear that at least 30 minutes of the film were DELIBERETLY copied from Carnosaur 1, 2, & 3.The whole movie "Raptor" was based of the movie and that was really a pathetic attempt to be a "Thriller, Action Packed, Dinosaur" copy. I loved that movie series and seeing it be put on a movie that cant even afford or willing COPY it without doing there own models is what America is coming to.I recommend you see the Carnosaur movie FIRST (all of them) and then watch this, and you will know what I mean.
- Spencer


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I understand that Roger Corman loves to do things on the cheap, but this is just sad. I purchased this flick from the dollar bin at my local video store not a month after watching the original Carnosaur. I was blown away; It was the same damn movie, with just some Corbin Bernesen spliced in! It reminded me of all of those 80s ninja movies that took old Kung Fu movies and spliced in a bunch of white ninjas running doing cartwheels with the word "ninja" written on their headbands (if you haven't seen them, check out "Ninja Terminator", "The Thundering Ninja", "Black Dragon" and "Ninja Warriors"). Thanks Roger Corman; you just made me waste a dollar.


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A gut-ripping baby T-Rex is on the loose in a small western town, prompting sheriff Eric Roberts and animal control agent Melissa Brasselle (who walks through her role in a very disinterest fashion) to get to the bottom of things. They discover that a mad scientist (Corbin Bernsen) is, unbeknownst to the government sponsorship, continuing on with a long-abandoned US research project called Operation Jurassic Storm (ha!) by creating an army of dinosaurs in a secluded underground lab facility. Before long, our heroes become trapped inside, the marines are called in, the power goes out and the dinos are set free to make a quick lunch of everyone they can get their claws and jaws on.
Despite an often infuriatingly inept script full of plot holes, character inconsistencies and loose ends, this direct-to-video copy of JURASSIC PARK and CARNOSAUR is fairly digestible trash, thanks to good production values, passable FX, the occasional laugh and plenty of brainless action.
Someone pointed out that an opening scene in this film was stolen from CARNOSAUR, but anyone used to watching Roger Corman productions knows he allows directors to liberally reuse clips from his early films to save both time and money.
Score: 3 out of 10


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Why isn't this movie on the bottom 100? Raptor is, without a doubt, the worst movie I have seen in all of my fifteen years of life. I have never before witnessed such a catastrophic mess as this. Absolutely everything about it is awkward and cheaply done.
Nobody in the cast gives a somewhat decent performance. The dialogue is utterly incoherent and the humor is anything but humorous. Corbin Bernsen was the most painful part of the whole thing. I can't help cringe when I recall some of his lines, like "In or out? You're worse than a cat!" and "Your lady friend isn't a very good poker player. She's just revealed her hand."
The raptors are a joke. Even I could make more realistic dinosaur effects than these filmmakers have shamelessly done. It is an insult to the actual velociraptors, or any dinosaur for that matter. Not only that, but the killing scenes are too gruesome even for me. I don't seriously think these animals would rip their victim to shreds and throw pieces all over the ground just to make everything look gorier. Besides, the blood and guts are all useless when you can see the deaths coming from miles and miles away.
I am a big fan of Jurassic Park movies and of dinosaurs. Maybe the filmmakers didn't anticipate anybody with a shred of intelligence or sense to disregard bad filmmaking to stumble upon this movie on HBO late at night, like I did. If I could say one thing to anybody involved in this film, I would have to quote Dr. Alan Grant from the first Jurassic Park...
"Just try to show a little respect."


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Screen treatment of the comedic Broadway success "The Gay Divorce" (a title which was considered too scandalous for American moviegoers, though it was used in the U.K.) concerns a man and woman (Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers) meeting under embarrassing circumstances while she's in the process of divorcing her spouse; they dance, argue, make up, dance, argue some more and dance some more. Betty Grable is very appealing in a brief bit (singing and dancing in the number "Let's K-nock K-nees" with overtly sissified Edward Everett Horton), but the star-couple looks distressed and unhappy throughout. The surroundings are screwball-sophisticated yet the characters are not more than one-dimensional. *1/2 from ****


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Films about the mundane are often the most interesting of all films to me, in the hands of an insightful artist who examines all the twisted little details of the mundane. The French cinema seems to often be very good at this sort of thing, and I love the French cinema.
This film was about the mundane. It didn't have a much of a plot. It was just characters who lived in a town, very normal people, and stuff just happened. But it wasn't very interesting stuff, and it wasn't examined very insightfully. The film did capture a bit of a mood, but it wasn't a particularly captivating mood. And while I can't think of much that the film did specifically wrong, it failed on just about every level to do anything right.
There were a lot of characters in this film. A lot of them kind of looked alike, so it was hard to figure out who was who, and what were their relations to one another. I don't mind putting some effort into understanding a film, or even watching an especially complex film more than one time to iron out the details, but this one was a puzzle not worth the solving for me.
The only good thing I can really say about this film is that the cinematography was pleasant--functional, not brilliant, but pleasant. The camera often captured some nice postcard-type shots. But it rarely found the really interesting little details.
I've seen a handful of not-so-good films so far at the Seattle International Film Festival, but this was the only one that failed to get any applause when the credits rolled. I sensed a big collective sigh of relief when the film was finally over. But I suppose there are probably some people out there who would like it.
4/10


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"The death of a performer at a Broadway stage play brings a theatre critic and a police detective together as an unlikely crime-solving duo. The dead performer's niece becomes not only the object of affection for our critic, but also a prime suspect in this death, and some other murders that occur at the theatre. 'The Phantom Killer' sets his sights upon the young woman as his next victim; so, it is a race against time for our heroes to catch the killer," according to the DVD sleeve's synopsis.
Milton Raison's screenplay puts a little spark in this low-budget mystery whodunit. Helpfully, Dave O'Brien (as Anthony "Tony" Woolrich) does well in the lead role; his skills as an actor appear to be much greater than the productions employing him. O'Brien and cab driving sidekick Frank Jenks (as Egbert "Romeo" Egglehoffer) would have made a fine 1950s TV detective team. Leading lady Kay Aldridge (as Claudia Moore) and the supporting cast are also good. Unfortunately, the story becomes meandering, and anti-climactic.
**** The Phantom of 42nd Street (5/2/45) Albert Herman ~ Dave O'Brien, Kay Aldridge, Frank Jenks


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This is a semi fictional memoir of an "international man" who have witnessed various political upheavals in recent 30 years.
I was hoping that this film would offer unique insight into politics and war. I was also hoping that it would be touching and affecting. However, I was disappointed by this film. "Chico" seemed fragmentary, with the main character, Ricardo, staying in one country for 10 to 20 minutes. As could be expected, no detailed storyline could be elaborated in such time frame. The excuses of him moving to another place were often perfunctorily explained. The result was a disappointing collection of fragmented clips shot in various countries.


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"My Blue Heaven" is boring. The plot is insipid; the characterizations and dialogue stink; the musical numbers, while occasionally staged in interesting ways, are not only too often absurd, but also lyrically trite, painfully bright, and emotionally hollow to the core. The leads, Betty Grable and Dan Dailey, are attractive professionals; however, in spite of their every talented effort to uplift the drear and uncompelling material, they fail. David Wayne and Jane Wyatt, for all their demonstrated talent in other projects, are more or less cyphers here.
There's really only one reason to watch "My Blue Heaven". One reason...one star: Mitzi Gaynor, in her film debut. Her total screen time is probably less than ten minutes, but so what? Her pert and promising screen personality, her feline beauty, and her exceptional charisma shine through gloriously and make these minutes the most watchable, memorable, and exciting moments in the entire film. If you would value an opportunity to see a tremendous young talent on the rise, then check out Miss Mitzi Gaynor in "My Blue Heaven."
Incidentally, I scorn (and would urge you to avoid) Drew Casper's manic, obsessive-compulsive DVD commentary for this film. Wordy, digressive, unduly fastidious, frequently ill-timed with what is playing on the screen, and galloping throughout with an excess of nervous energy, his comments are absolutely indigestible.


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...and in this series, I've been reduced to an annoying jock with a gay hairstyle. Remember my friend Marco, who got all the good lines in the books? Well, in this series his one-liners put Mr. Freeze to shame. Remember our uber-evil nemesis Visser Three? He's a bald guy with inane catchphrases. Remember Rachel, "Xena, the Warrior Princess", and Cassie, my sensitive and caring love interest? They've been turned into mindless bimbos by the 10 (!) writers who decided the original characters weren't cool enough for TV. Remember the awesome extra-terrestial Ax, who was cool, intelligent, and really, really liked cinnamon buns? In this series he's the Token Alien with an extremely annoying voice. Remember the witty banter our team had in the books? In this series our dialogue is so dreary and stupid it's obvious the writers were pandering to the lowest common denominator.
So forget everything you thought you knew about the Animorphs! It was Cassie who became allergic to morphing, not Rachel, thought-speak is *supposed* to echo, and Visser Three and Ax, rarely, if ever, appeared as Andalites (no, it has nothing to do with the budget!).
I'm not crazy. And I'm not lying. The jerks are all around us. And if you're unlucky, one of them might adapt one of your favourite books, or series, or graphic novels, into a really awful TV show. You've been warned.
"Finally... television worth watching." ~ (the very bald) Visser Three
(r#91)


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Ah Animorphs. I loved the book series and eagerly devoured each one in middle school and when I heard that there was a television adaptation, I was very excited.
Boy what a let down the final product was. I think for me, this was the moment when Nickelodeon stopped being about cool programming and more generic.
So what was wrong with the series? Let me count the ways: 1. The characters were HORRIFICALLY miscast. In the books, the Animorphs were somewhere between 12-14, the television cast were at least 18. I remember being horrified when I first saw the cast photos.
2. Horrific acting/bad writing. I dunno which was to blame so I'm lumping into the lumpy mass that it was. Perhaps it was the fact that the accelerated age of the cast hampered the humor that is at least cute coming out of a 13 year old because Marco - not funny. In fact, I don't remember a single comical moment from the group and there were a few. The actors were certainly not helped by the writing which was bland at its best and head smackingly pathetic at its worst.
3. My lord they were stingy with the budget. The final result of the Andalites alone should have convinced Viacom to pull the plug...Their heads had clefts that clearly showed which was the helmet.
4. Back to the cast - Rachel by far was the biggest let down, far from being the warrior woman in the books, the best equivalent in the TV series was "scarecrow". Also, I know Cassie was an idealist but there is a difference between "idealist" and "idiot".
5. One of the worst opening titles ever. Did the music have to be THAT obvious? 6. Answering question 6, "yes" because everything else was dumbed down so why shouldn't the expectedly less intelligent viewers receive a thick as a brick song from a lame rap-rock rip-off or whatever the hell that was.
Since then, there have been bigger let downs (Iraq, 2004) but in case I haven't made myself clear - this show sucked and was an abomination to the book series it was supposed to be based from.


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I'd liked the Takashi Miike films I'd seen so far, but I found this pretty disappointing. I'd bought it, but I won't be keeping it.
I saw it on the Adness DVD, which has just two episodes. In the first, a killer abducts women, cuts the top of their skull off to expose the brain, plants them in the ground up to their chin, and plants a flower in the brain. You can tell that from the DVD box. In the movie, the top of the head is digitally blurred out by TV static. Had you not seen the DVD box, the viewer wouldn't know what people were looking at until later a young cop produced a small model of the body. Oddly, there is also a flash frame later on of the woman's head and it is not censored. Apart from this, I'm not really sure what was going on. Some women get phone calls, and a sketchy animated character cavorts around when that happens. An animated character also appears on TV screens sometimes. It's unclear if anybody sees it.
In the second episode, pregnant women are being found cut open and their babies are missing. Again, a cop produces a model of what the corpses are like, which is helpful since again the actual body is censored. There is also a natural birth in the movie, but oddly even that baby and the umbilical cord are censored! According the the DVD box, uncensored versions were not kept when this was originally made. Perhaps even if they had, if they knew they were going to be censored, maybe they didn't bother actually showing anything...? Not sure.
If I hear the later episodes are better, maybe I'll look for them. As it is, I won't bother.


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Much of the commentary on this board revolves around debating the validity of some comparison to R DOGS made on the DVD cover. Forget about all of that... This film-- er-- home movie is utterly horrendous. How can anyone with a shred of credibility claim this as being 10/10??? There is no plot, none. I couldn't believe that I spent money to rent this (more on that later) and that I had fooled myself into believing that this (based on box cover art and some sort of film fest award blurb) had potential. The only thing I do really remember was that, unbelievably, one of the annoying main characters was supposedly offed with a bullet to the head... and he ends up surviving the wound and making it to the final credits alive. Wow. And looky dere, Killers has a sequel. Double wow.
True story -- I actually was in so much denial that I had wasted my money and life force on this rental that I kept the videotape for what must've been six months. I kept telling myself that it never actually happened. The video on top of the TV was an illusion - a mental symbol of my self-loathing. After someone pointed out that is was indeed real and that I needed to get a grip, I decided that I couldn't just leave it there. I thought, "How many others have I denied the suffering of sitting through the viewing of this masterpiece by hoarding Killers all to myself?" I had to do the right thing and return it back to the hell from which it came.
So, as I imagine most of the populous of IMDb would do in a similar situation, I mustered up some major courage and drove to the video store... at 2AM. After making sure that no one was around, I got out of my car (still running of course), slipped the movie into the drop box slot, and booked the hell out of there never to return.
I guess I expected that some goons from Hollywood Video corporate would come looking for me (the bill must've racked up to something like $1,238.67 by that time) so I moved away from the area. However, coincidently, much like the Killers storyline, nothing ever happened.


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...but you can see it from here.
I definitely don't understand why anyone would recommend this movie. Not a bit of plot, not suspenseful, not well-made. No point to having made it, really.
Completely forgettable in ever way.


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This film is an embarrassment. Nothing works on any level. The direction, screenplay, acting , and editing work together to repel your eyes from the screen. Everything is inappropriate and incoherent. At first you can sit there with and groan, wince, and laugh at it, but very shortly the whole effort of watching just becomes too ponderous.


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This has got to be one of absolute worst movies I've ever seen in my life. The writing and acting are just pathetic. It ranks right up there with Uncle Sam on the all time worst movies ever made. However, when I see crap like this able to make it to video, it really inspires me to pursue my wild dreams of making films because I know I could do a better job than what the makers of Killers did.


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Let's just say that it might be the worst movie I've ever seen. On the front of the box of the movie it says something about it resembling Reservoir Dogs. I fell for it hook, line, and sinker. This is just a warning message to anyone who might read this. It's not even worth renting when you want something to laugh at.


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Imagine an exploitive remake of The Defiant Ones with a black chick and a white chick attached to each other. Set the story on some Caribbean island where the drug dealers rule and the revolution has arrived. And have the black woman be from Huggy Bear's stable of ladies and the white woman be a watered down Patty Hearst and you've got Black Mama, White Mama.
In those waning days of the drive-in theater this item must have been a big old hit. All the hot buttons of the Seventies are pushed in this one. Even though they both fill out their clothes better and will get a few whistles from the males in the audience no one is ever going to mistake Pam Grier and Margaret Markov for Sidney Poitier and Tony Curtis. All right, Halle Berry and Jamie Lee Curtis.
Margaret and Pam are prisoners where the guards and the warden look lasciviously at the new fish arriving. Margaret is a rich girl from the state who took up 'the revolution', whilst Pam's your basic high priced call girl who's been servicing the local drug kingpin and grew tired of it and tried to leave the island.
Margaret's fellow revolutionaries ambush the bus transporting them from the women's prison to town, but they get lost in the escape. Both have their different agendas, but like Sid and Tony they can't quite agree on whose agenda comes first. Makes for some interesting times as the police, the drug dealers, and the revolutionaries are all looking for these two illfated chain buddies.
Just so you don't get any wrong ideas the head of the revolutionaries and Markov's kanoodling partner is named Ernesto played by Filipino actor Zaldy Zshornack. The whole mess was shot in the Phillipines who were getting their own film industry started.
Nice location photography in the Phillipines is all that Black Mama, White Mam has to recommend it. But if you're a fan of really bad black exploitation flicks, this is one for you.


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