Macindoe Tim: General Debate 
Macindoe Tim: General Debate 
[Volume:669;Page:15938] 
TIM MACINDOE (National—Hamilton West) 
: 
 It has been fascinating to witness the Labour Opposition’s rudderless and insipid performance during the general debate this afternoon. It will not surprise many people who have followed Labour members’ confused and contradictory announcements of recent times that they were so reluctant to engage with Government members over current policies or to defend their own irresponsible economic record when they were in Government which contributed so significantly to New Zealand’s slide into recession. 
Labour’s record in Government is now roundly and rightly condemned by economists commentators and the electorate at large. Yet what has Labour learnt? It has learnt that Ed Miliband writes better speeches than Phil Goff. Labour members have learnt from their embattled leader that David Caygill has more credibility than their current spokesman on finance presumably because Mr Caygill played no role in the economic recklessness that Labour inflicted upon New Zealand for 9 long years. They do not seem to have learnt that Trevor Mallard should behave himself during question time on days when he is expected to lead Labour’s “Charge of the Ultra-light Brigade” in two measures on the same day’s Order Paper. And on the day when we welcome to the House the new member for the marginal seat of Mana they have recently learnt that even their previously strongest supporters are deserting them. 
They are probably learning that their commitment to voodoo economics is about as popular as their recent opposition to the package to save the  
Hobbit 
 movies. It is as credible as their commitment to higher taxes uncontrolled Government spending and welfare for millionaires. 
Members on this side of the House and members of the public have learnt a great deal from Labour’s sorry and embarrassing performance both in this debate and during today’s question time which preceded it. We have learnt that less than a year out from a general election Labour is in freefall. We have learnt that Labour members lack confidence in their leadership their philosophical direction and in one another. They are not just working on the basis that pixies at the bottom of the garden will jump up and finance their policies—as our new Poet Laureate Aaron Gilmore observed earlier—but also they are increasingly turning to the pixies to write their policies. Judging by how many people turn up to any of their public meetings nowadays or take seriously any of their utterances it can be only a matter of time before their front bench is replaced by five pixies three goblins and an orc. Actually I think the orc has already joined them which may explain why there are so many headless chooks on their middle and backbenches. 
I am looking forward to campaigning in Hamilton West next year on the importance of National’s six-point plan to growing the economy especially when it is contrasted with Labour’s six-point plan to one change their leader; two lose the few electorates they hold at the moment; and three increase Government borrowing to levels that will reduce New Zealand to a banana-less republic. One has to wonder what they are going to feed to the poor pixies and goblins but I digress. The fourth point is to tax anything that moves which means their Mana campaign team will be all right but everyone else is in big trouble; the fifth is to bring back David Caygill Fraser Colman and Arnold Nordmeyer; and the sixth is to hope that endless treks around the country on the magical mystery tour with Phil playing the ukulele and Annette warbling “As Long as He Needs Me” will at least keep them away from any gathering where they might be expected to say something credible and remotely compelling. 
How ironic that David Parker should want to highlight a recent poll that put Labour on 28 percent. How fascinating that Labour is starting to hope that if it adds its support to the support for New Zealand First the Greens Jim Anderton and the Monster Raving Loony Party it might just cobble together sufficient votes to get across the 5 percent MMP threshold next year. How insightful that Mr Parker spoke of losing the plot. If I had dug a hole as deep and wide as the one he and his mates are still digging I would want to lose it too. 
This is the last general debate of the year. In my usual humble fashion and in the manner to which I have become accustomed I am its final speaker. So it falls to me to perform the last rites for the lacklustre leaderless limp and lamentable Labour Party. I take the responsibility seriously knowing that as Michael Joseph Savage Peter Fraser and Norman Kirk have spun in their graves in recent times at the shambolic efforts of their modern day successors the kindest act we can all perform is to find Mr Parker’s lost plot ease the whole Labour caucus into it gently and wait for some decent opposition from the pixies fairies and goblins who will so surely have replaced them by this time next year. Merry Christmas. 
The debate having concluded the motion lapsed.