Collins JudithHon JUDITH COLLINS (National—Papakura): There's a lot of talk tonight about people helping their kids through things and whānau and family. The best way of keeping your kid safe is to keep them out of the Family Court and out of having to deal with the fact that their parents and their extended families cannot sort themselves out. It is an incredibly sad thing for people to expect judges to have to sort out all their problems for them and to sort out their relationships. And even worse when I see—and I have seen and many of us who have practised know that there are parents who unfortunately use their children to attack the other parent. That is an awful thing to see. So it's good to see that we've got this new role here which is to try and speed up matters in the court but the best way of speeding it up is to keep them out of court in the first place. Most people who undergo a relationship break up particularly involving children most people do not end up in court and that is because they have decided to take charge of their own lives that if they do have lawyers those lawyers have tried to find them a solution that does not involve getting a judge to sort things out for them and does not involve them telling parents which days they can see children and what times and actually abdicating the responsibility of parents. It's all very well to talk as I've heard tonight people talking about Oh these attempts of the Family Court; it's all so terrible since 2017." Actually it's always been a problem. That's why steps have been brought in. The Family Court was first set up at a time when the District Court used to deal with these issues and it was going to be a fast cheap service that was available to people when they needed it. It is now an expensive service that is actually utterly reliant on legal aid. Legal aid does not come from the Government; it comes from the taxpayers—the very people that in these cases often don't have very much money because in many cases they had a home that is now split; they're now both homeless or they're renting or they're trying to get ahead. And what we see in Family Court matters are people in most cases—not all; most cases—who are absolutely distraught because their relationship has failed their children are upset and their children are often under such stress that they may be playing up at school they may be going through all sorts of other traumas. I know it's so old-fashioned but really let's just put the kids first for a start. Try and keep them out of court. When they are in court it's good to get it moving fast but don't kid ourselves that these parents are somehow made better by any Family Court system. The Family Court—and I often look at those judges who work in it and my heart goes out to them. I don't know how they cope with the constant and utter negativity and watching people who once loved each other so much that they had children together now hating each other so much that they don't even want to be in the same room together. I've had to deal with those situations for other people as a lawyer. I know some of my colleagues here have as well. It is really distressing but to send people straight to a court rather than trying to sort it out through mediation is cruel. It's cruel because there are things said in court and in affidavits in particular that can never be taken back. People tend to forget this. They seem to think that somehow a court will make it all better but they will never take that back. It is really important that we understand that. It's good to have you know this new role. It hopefully will help. And obviously COVID has been very difficult many people feeling the court system has ground to a halt over the 24 months where we've had massive disruption. Those of us who were lawyers and with practising certificates still get the notices about how we're supposed to try and engage in the court system. Thankfully I'm otherwise occupied in this system but it is really hard for people and rather than looking at how we're going to fix everything for people how about we actually just give people a bit of a chance to sort things out? Promote mediation which has always been a primary role for lawyers to be able to do. It is actually a lawyer's obligation to first try to sort these matters out and to help people to find a way rather than charging off to court. Going into Family Court signifies a failure—a failure of a relationship a failure of the legal profession to be able to keep the matter out of court and a failure of people in many cases to put their families first their children first. I guess that's sort of slightly judgmental but you know what? I think parents have to be able to sometimes stand up and be the adults in the room and say "Our kids come first." Children do not ask to be born; they are born and it's our obligation to do whatever we can to put them first. I just think sometimes we expect other adults particularly with a gown on or something else to be in charge. We've got to be in charge of ourselves; sort the matters out. My big plea to families caught up in the Family Court system: try and sort the matter out yourselves. Get lawyers. If you've got lawyers who just simply want to take this matter to court think about: are they the best people for you? Do they want to help you or do they want to help the system? Put the kids first. Keep your kids out of court."