Brown SimeonSIMEON BROWN (National—Pakuranga): Thank you Madam Speaker for the opportunity to take a call on the Plain Language Bill. I think I would reinterpret that title in plain language. It's a bill looking for a problem. This is a bill which is really just—I just think in plain language just a joke. I mean this is a bill which is effectively just trying to increase bureaucracy at a time when the Public Service is an all-time huge massive beast and now we are saying that we need to employ more people so that we can have plain language. Look that's a great intention. We all want to see documents in plain language. We all want to see when we get a letter from the Government that it clearly states what we are required to do. That's all very good intent but here we are passing a piece of legislation which is just another piece of bureaucratic intent which is going to clog up our Government departments. I can tell you that this will not make one single difference to people's lives in New Zealand. The difference it will make is a whole lot of additional jobs in the Public Service.We're now going to have plain language officers running around. Each department has to appoint a plain language officer who is responsible for ensuring that every document and every communication in that organisation is written in plain language that is easily understood. I'm looking forward to seeing how much that's going to cost the taxpayer. How many millions of dollars we're going to have to employ? What the qualifications for a plain language officer? What degree? Do they need a degree in linguistics?Hon Member: Failed School Certificate!SIMEON BROWN: Just a School Certificate? Well School Certificate's a bit old for me. I guess that's NCEA level 2 or NCEA level 3. I didn't do School Certificate; I did the English standards under the NCEA framework. I mean that's something we could put into plain language isn't it? We could turn NCEA into something much more plain language which people can understand a bit better. I'm sure there's plenty of little opportunities for these little plain language officers to be running around meddling in lots of business. Will they be having to check every email which goes out to a constituent or to a person or a customer of that particular Government organisation making sure that the language is checked and it's plain language it's easily understandable?I just think it's going to be an absolute waste of time. I just think this Government needs to really reflect on its own use of language. You know the Prime Minister talks about how she's got a great degree in communications and she's able to communicate to New Zealanders. Well before the Government goes and tries to meddle in every single Government department to try and make sure that every document and email and everything is in plain language why don't they consider looking at how their own communication is for New Zealanders? Because I can tell you that people coming to see me in my office are not lining up at the door with their little letters and saying I don't know what this says. Can you please explain it to me?" or "This Government annual report it needs to be explained." What they're coming in and saying is "Actually all these COVID rules and regulations and nonsense and you know everything the Government says about you know we're now in—what are we in?—phase 2 of traffic light red after step 3 of level 2?"Hon Member: That's not plain language.SIMEON BROWN: I mean that's not plain language; that's pretty darn confusing. New Zealanders are pretty confused. They're frustrated. They don't know how they're going to get their rapid antigen test. They don't know who's actually a critical worker who's not a critical worker.There are so many things this Government should be doing to actually make sure it's communicating properly to New Zealanders and that doesn't require legislation. That just requires good management. That requires good communication. That requires the Government actually intentionally desiring for New Zealanders to actually know what the rules and regulations are as we go through this time of COVID-19. It doesn't require a piece of legislation which will effectively create more bureaucratic jobs in Wellington—because let's face it that's where all these plain language officers will be employed. What we need is a Government which is actually addressing the real issues facing New Zealanders—the issues which mean that businesses can access rapid antigen tests that everyone can access rapid antigen tests so we can make sure we have the tools that will get us through this pandemic not having a whole lot of plain language officers.I just imagine they'll have their plain language conference. They'll come together for a plain language conference.Hon Member: What will they call it?SIMEON BROWN: I'm not sure what they'll call the plain language conference but you can see they'll all get together in Wellington once a year for their plain language conference. The Public Service Association will come along to give a presentation and they'll all have their cups of tea and scones with cream and jam and the reality is taxpayers will be paying millions of dollars and all of those reports—there'll be absolutely no difference. This is not a bill the National Party supports—ASSISTANT SPEAKER (Hon Jacqui Dean): Order! The member's time is up."