dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
Due to the lack of image, I cannot accurately say that the summary overview is correctly presented. I cannot be sure that the information provided is correct either. The essay is lacking a proper trending statement.That should be located at the end of the summary overview as that is a summary of the measurement trend. A trending sentence does not include actual measurement values.  
  
Regardless of how one looks at the presentation, a proper additional paragraph is missing. Based on the provided data, it appears that should be a 4 paragraph presentation. Perhaps the student did not properly getup the measurements for the report. The sentence starting with  
  
On the other hand,  
indicates a new topic discussion and should have been formatted as a new paragraph. Yes, that is where the missing 4th paragraph went.
## the percentage of households in England and Wales

  
  
The figure compares the proportion of households in purchased and rented housing in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011.  
Overall, with continuous rise over the period, the percentage of families living in owned accommodation was higher than the percentage of households in leased apartments and houses.  
  
In 1918, the proportion of purchased housing was 78% while that of rented accommodation was merely 22%. From 1918 to 1961, due to the steady increase in percentage of apartments and houses under the term of lease, there is significant change in the proportions of the two means of housing. While the percentage of bought accommodation dropped from 78% down to roughly 60%, that of rented houses and flats rocketed to 40%. It is noticeable that the percentage of both types of accommodation were 50%.  
  
Interestingly, the period from 2001 to 2011 witnessed the decrease in proportion of purchased housing. Although there had been continuous rise in the percentage of leased accommodation, the year 2011 experienced a decline from 70% to 63%.  
  
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The presentation is acceptable, with somewhat clear discussions. The essay delivers on almost all the required data presentation. However, the paragraph presentations rely mostly on long sentence presentations seperated by commas.  
  
Known as run-on sentences, students tend to confuse the format with that of a complex sentence. These run-on sentences are actually improper grammar presentations. The lack of varied punctuation usage to increase the degree of thought clarity and topic seperation, along with a single data reporting style limits the ability of the writer to actually show his skills when it comes to information presentation.  
  
Varying the sentence presentations to reflect proper simple and complex sentence presentations would help limit the G R A shortcomings of the essay. Better paragraph development, by increasing the sentence count to 3 or 4 per paragraph would help accomplish that.
## data on investing in music

  
  
The pie charts illustrate the changes in investing money in Northern Ireland with regard to music over three years 2005, 2008, 2011.  
  
In common, CDs became the most sought-after things that were expenditure. Otherwise, the miniature factor through the period was labeled "other".  
  
As can be seen at the first set of data, CD sales accounted for slightly more than three-fifth. Nonetheless, the proportion plunged remarkably for a fifth in the following three years. Then, it reached a bottom at 26% in 2011.  
  
In contract, the beginning of downloaded music was only 6%. Three years later, digital purchase leaped dramatically, which raised to 25%. By 2011, it had overtaken both concerts and CDs, accounted for more than two-fifths of all sales. On the other hand, the "other" category went up marginally from 2% to 3%. As is shown in the charts, the money disbursed on concerts oscillate moderately.  
  
Just more than a third at the first set, it started to fall slightly over three years. Eventually, the concert sales increased at 28% in 2011.
The writer failed to indicate the number of pie charts included and how these pie charts were identified. Why is the number of images required? Remember that several years can be measured in a single pie chart. If the information is measured over years within several pie charts, then that should be made clear to the reader. That is why the number of images and how it is divided within each pie is important to the summary.  
  
plunged  
The mid-measurement unit should be indicated to show the proper flow of decrease.  
  
In contract  
Word usage error. This should state, " In contrast" to show a comparison between data indicators.  
  
The task 1 essay cannot have more than 4 paragraphs. The concert reference should have been better integrated into the previous paragraphs to suit the formatting requirements. There was no reason to seperate the last 2 sentences if proper formatting was applied.
**GLOBAL WARMING IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST THREATS HUMANS FACE IN THE 21ST CENTURY, AND SEA LEVELS ARE CONTINUING TO RISE AT ALARMING RATES. WHAT PROBLEMS ARE ASSOCIATED WITH THIS AND WHAT ARE SOME POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS.**  
  
Nowadays, global warming has become a controversial topic in modern society. It is ordinarily believed that the ocean surface is continuously rising at an alarming rate. This essay will discuss the potential problems of global warming and conjure several solutions.  
  
It is undeniable that climate change has caused severe repercussions to humanity and wildlife. It is effortlessly observable that the loss of habitats and rising sea level is emerging as a major threat. For example, in 2018, over 300,000 square meters of glaciers have vanished, which was the territory of over 1,000 polar bears. Thus, polar fauna is on the verge of being entirely annihilated owing to gradually diminishing habitable areas. Apart from it, climate change can lead to soil salinity, which poses significant adversities to the locals. To cite an instance, it is predicted that in 2100, Ca Mau and several other cities in the vicinity of the ocean would experience drastic soil salinity, which would make mentioned area unable to be utilized for agricultural purposes. Hence, the foreseeable famine is not a fictional vision anymore.  
  
Regarding to the problems caused by global warming, it is wise to conjure several possible solutions. First action to resolve this issue is for the government to enact a law forcing industrial firms to purify exhausted fume before releasing into the atmosphere. This would decrease the annual carbon footprint, which is the main factor contributing to global warming. Secondly, authorities are able to fund scientific research to procrastinate or potentially nullify the detrimental effect of the rising ocean surface.  
  
In conclusion, humanity and wildlife are experiencing the repercussions caused by climate change and global warming, from habitat loss to extinction and famine. However, these effects are reversible if proper actions are applied.
In the paraphrase, the writer must showa connection between global warming and 7 sea levels. something like:  
  
*Global warming is believed to be a deadly threat to mankind as it directly affects ocean elevations. These combined problems cause... I believe these can be solved by...*  
  
This clearly developed representative and response paragraph will result in a better TA score with the possibility of a C + C boost if the opinion is properly explained and supported.  
  
The problem paragraph is filled with too much establishing information, not enough discussion clarification. Limit information presentation and focus on the main point instead. One piece of relevant data is more than enough to establish the topic.  
  
The solution fails to present a comprehensive solution that would solve global warming in relation to rising water levels. There is a lack of cohesiveness in that paragraph as the solutions presented disconnect the 2 topics in a combined solution.
## The diagram illustrates the way people grow bananas for commercial purposes.

  
  
Overall, it shows several stages of the process from growing and picking to the buying stage. There are seven main stages between the bananas  
being planted and being bought.  
  
First, the bananas are grown from nine months to a year with a few conditions. For instance, the weather temperature the oughts to be approximately 25 to 30 degrees and an abundance of rain. After that, they will pick the bananas when they are still green. To the checking stage, they carefully selected the good fruits and throw away the bad ones.  
  
Next, the bananas are shipped at 13. 3 degrees in fridges. Second, they put the bananas into a special room where bananas become ripe and yellow to ready to deliver. When the bananas are ripe, they will be delivered in a lorry to supermarkets. In the  
  
end, the customers will opt and buy the bananas for their  
uses  
.
The diagram indicates the number of stages along with the number of procedures per stage. The summary is not clear tothe vader because of the lack of development separators. The trending sentence should also make reference to the main stage from the diagram.  
  
The writer should clearly indicate the procedures involved in the 3 stage process. It is confusing to read the paragraphs as these seem to be losing track of the procedures and stages involved. The count is off because of improper reference points. The presentation just might receive failing GRA and C + C marks, causing a failed final score.  
  
The student must learn to outline the presentation prior to writing. That will help create a coherent presentation of the stages as divided into procedures.
## close relationship in a workplace

  
  
It is a common belief that a nice connection of colleagues is the pledge of success for a corporation. Nevertheless, From my point of view, I am of the opinion that close relationships in the work environment have their own advantages and disadvantages. This essay will discuss both sides of it.  
  
On the one hand, there are many compelling reasons why the strong interconnection of employees puts the company at risk of remaining backward without a break. First, It has been proved that the essential being for a triumph business is healthy competition in employment workplace. However, In order to avoid offending their peers, people often choose to minimize their workability, which leads to lost opportunities to boost the company's potentials. Second, Being too close-knit to their coworkers will make it easy for them to overlook each other's fault, even hiding mistakes at work. In a restaurant, for instance, although most of the staff are aware of one who unintentionally made a strange object drop in food, they hardly point out this person because of their neighborly relations; so, the business owner is losing control of their labor force.  
  
On the other hand, Despite the drawbacks mentioned above, many people are still in favor of the usefulness of forging friendships in the office, and justifiably so. First of all, it is a hugely beneficial to build warm relationships with those who are in the same department. As we have seen, A harmonious workplace will ensure effective collaboration on a project, which maximizes the productivity of the firm's jobs. Secondly, good interpersonal relations are crucial in getting job satisfaction, which is a factor that makes employees strive to contribute in the proceeding complete the task-work. Furthermore, unlike the pressure atmosphere of individualism, getting closer to colleagues are allowed all crew side by side developing their proficiency and their potential skills; hence, The company's staff will be more increasingly professional.  
  
To sum up, while it is apparent that the negative affectively of having close relationships in workplace is still existing, It is undeniable that being on good terms with colleagues are enable us decrease working pressure and increase productivity.
The writer's opinion is not a required presentation in an A / D presentation. The discussion instruction asks the writer to educate the reader on the topic, without trying to influence the reader's final opinion. The task accuracy score of this essay is negatively affected by the presentation of that opinion and lack of related topic discussion presentations.  
  
The concluding paragraph contains incorrect information. As I previously mentioned, an opinion should not be provided in this presentation. Neither should it make a decision for the reader. These no's are exactly what this paragraph does. Rather, it should merely summarize the A / D presentation points in a manner that creates a new statement paraphrase.
## Wretched Institution of marriage

  
  
These days, the number of individuals opt for living alone, which has become quite normal. From my perspective, this trend is unfavorable due to the following three reasons. Firstly, the tendency to stay single increases the rate of people suffering from psychological problems. There is a high likelihood that the unmarried have to cope with numerous strains of study, work, and finance by themselves. They do not have intimate enough relationships to confide in, which leads them to have more adverse attitudes. A recent study discloses that single people often resort to drugs to relieve stress and many become addicted. Secondly, the single lifestyle results in population aging. People living alone tend to spend all their time enjoying their own life instead of having a baby, which is considered a key contributor to the decline in fertility rates. Lastly, this trend inhibits long-term economic growth. Some people might say that single life boosts economic growth because individuals can completely concentrate on careers. However, these might be merely short-term benefits because of predictions about a dramatic increase in the proportion of older people, which will put heavy pressure on health systems and welfare. Moreover, a decline in the working-age population is unavoidable, so the economy may be in a deep recession due to the scarcity of the labor force. In conclusion, the unmarried lifestyle is detrimental due to problems of psychology, the aging population, and the economy.
This is a good example of a failing score task 2 essay. The minimum word count of 250 words was not met, indicating a high deduction rate for an under discussed essay. The response format is incorrect as the original reference is "In many countries ", which was not identified in the restatement. Thus changing the topic from an international to local concern. Though the response is correct, the student did not present a discussion outline to build the discussion points.  
  
Though proper reasoning was provided, the lack of logical paragraph based explanations per reason was not shown. A lack of proper response development led the essay to a failing coherence and cohesiveness score. Individually developed topic paragraph discussions are needed to accomplish that task.  
  
The essay provides a clear lack of interest on the part of the writer to provide a score adherent discussion of this topic. No effort was placed in the development of the essay.
## WRITING IELTS I - ACADEMIC task

  
  
The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.  
  
The diagrams demonstrate the average proportions in each meal of three categories of nutrients.which may be harmful for health if eaten too much . They include sodium, Saturated fat, Added Sugar. They have taken the result in the United of Statue America.  
  
In general, Sodium and Saturated Fat account for higher amounts in dinner than other meals. Besides that, The majority of Added Sugar contains in Snacks more than other typical meals.  
  
The first chart, sodium has the highest number of nutrients in dinner ( 43%), followed by Lunch ( 29%) which has a margin over 14% . The rates of sodium in breakfast and lunch are equal ( 14%). The second chart is about Saturated fat, the minority of it has in breakfast (16%), whilst it accounts for 37% in dinner. There is a big difference between breakfast and dinner that is over 21%. However, there is not a margin over snacks and lunch respestively 21%, 26% which is only about 5%.  
  
The last pie chart is nutrients called Added Sugar. Differently, the largest amount of it is contained in snacks with 42% while other charts have mostly the biggest number of nutrients in dinner. Through the last chart, the rates of added sugar in other typical meals in the USA is not different with respectively 16% in breakfast, 19% Snacks and 23% in dinner.
The writer is confusing the reader. Charts are different from diagrams. His summary is inaccurate when compared to the original presentation.Failure to simply complete a summary report based on the unspecified number of images means the writer will not complete this report within 20 minutes.  
  
The writer also failed to identify reference errors (United Statute of America V. United STATES of America). The writer should focus on quickly offering image information with a controlled number of words, no more than 200. There needs to be immediate clarity in the information.  
  
There is too much parenthesis usage in the essay, which led to an exaggerated amount of word usage. While variety in the presentation scores well, it needs to be balanced. Do not overuse a single format as that could lead to other presentation problems and eorors.  
  
\* Limited review due to lack of image
## **Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time.**

  
*This can benefit teenagers and the community as well.  
  
To what extent do you agree or disagree.*  
  
People in all societies should start developing their skills and learn to take the responsibility for themselves and the community when they are teenagers. To help teenagers meet the expectation, many believe that they should take part in unpaid community works at leisure time so that both teenagers and the community can achieve a win-win situation. I too believe that the perspective has more advantages than its drawbacks.  
  
Firstly, those who work in community must have lots of opportunities to communicate with others thus are able to polish their verbal skills and develop personalities. For example, if teenagers try to teach the children at rural area where education resources are relatively limited, they have to reorganize and simplify the knowledges and, possibly make them more attractive to the children. This skill can also be applied to many situations in their lifetimes. Secondly, working in community also encourages teenagers to cooperate with a variety of people. It requires not only personal skills but also patience, tolerance, and empathy to accomplish the goal of the group. Thirdly, making contribution to other people can help them recognize their own value which leads to a healthier mind.  
  
However, some people may challenge that teenagers should get paid if they contribute to the society. Indeed, we should not expect them to devote all their free time to serve the community for free. Nonetheless, at the stage of teen, earning money is also not the priority for them. They certainly have the right to choose whatever they are willing to do, yet doing unpaid community work is undoubtedly a commendable option.  
  
In conclusion, I agree with the notion that teenagers doing unpaid works in community has positive effects on both themselves and the society.
The writer did not respond to the discussion question regarding the extent of his dis/ agreement with the given statement. The discussion was instead changed to an advantage/ disadvantage discussion. The essay will get a failing TA score as the response is not related to the discussion instruction. The simple agreement posted in the ill developed conclusion is not going to receive a score because, even though it offers an agreement, it is not provided in the correct paragraph and format at the start of the essay. The actual measured response belongs in the introduction. The writer can expect to recieve a failing score due to the incorrect discussion format.  
  
An extent essay can never be paired with an A/D presentation as those are 2 seperate and different discussion styles. The lack of prompt writing familiarity and English comprehension skills are evident on the part of the writer. The writer is advised to familiarize himself with the varied task 2 question and response styles before proceeding with any practice tests.
## the proportion of people's total spending in a particular European country

  
  
The pie charts give information about the proportion of people's total expenditure on six different goods and services in a European country between 1958 and 2008. Overall, it is clear that spending on housing, travel and luxury goods increased while that of food, clothing and entertainment decreased over the period of 50 years.  
  
Beginning with the percentage of people's total spending on housing in 1958, it accounted for 22%. Then 50 years later, this figure rose and housing became the biggest expense with 32%. Similarly, the expenditure on transport saw a considerable increase from 8% in 1958 to 17% in 2008. In addition, people just spent 7% of expense on luxury goods in 1958, but 50 years later the total grew remarkably to nearly one fifth.  
  
In 1958, people spent the largest portion on food, with nearly one third. However, in 2008, the spending on food was a small minority in the total. The proportion of clothing witnessed a minimal decline from 18% to 16% during the period of 50 years. Similarly, the expenditure on entertainment in 1958 was 13%, but later fell to 6% in 2008.  
  
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The writer must always indicate the number of images whenever more than 1 image is provided, The images must be identified seperately in the summary and provided with individual summary information. That is because the images offer seperate information which are later collated in the report paragraphs. The weakest aspect of this report is the summary overview. The confusing summary overview of the images caused this problem.  
  
The writer should learn to use terms that indicate comparisons between the years indicated. Rather than saying, "Then 50 years later ..." , it would be more writing and task appropriate to indicate " In comparison, there was a... 50 years later." The writer must keep in mind the audience of the report and use task /language appropriate references.
## the proportion of manufacturing production over the world

  
  
The bar chart demonstrates the proportion of manufacturing production in Asia, Europe, and the rest of the world between 1840 and 2000. Overall, Asia and the rest of the world's figures were relatively upwards while the number of manufacturing production of Europe had a steep decline. The percentage of the rest of the world underwent a gradual increase throughout the given period.  
  
The period began with Asia having the highest level of production at 50%, followed by Europe which was at 40%. The figure for the production of the rest of the world in 1840 was the lowest of the whole chart. In 1880, Asia's number declined significantly by one third of the figure in 1840 while the rest of the world had a dramatic acceleration from 10% in 1840 to 25% in 1880, narrowed the difference with Asia. By 1920, Europe's level of manufacturing production mirror the figure for Asia's production in 1840 at 50%.  
  
In 1960, Asia and the rest of the world's level of production climbed up slightly and Europe had the same statistic as the rest of the world, which was at approximately 38%. The figure of production in Asia almost doubled from 25% in 1960 to 45% in 2000 while Europe and the rest of the world suffered from a considerable decrease at about 28% and 32% respectively.  
  
Task: The bar graph shows the total manufacturing production in percentages Asia, Europe, and the rest of the world.  
  
*