dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
**Writing task 2:  
*People say that a country will benefit greatly if its students study abroad.*  
## To what extent do you agree or disagree?**  
  
It can be argued that it is beneficial for a nation to let its students go oversea to pursue education from international environment. As far as I am concerned, I partly agree with this statement. Although the positivity can be observed through the international updated knowledege, a country may lose its best students.  
  
On the one hand, when students study abroad, the new knowledge they absorb would benefit their own country. In fact, many developed nations such as USA, the UK have preceded with the major technological breakthoughs. Thus, if they learn the knowledge of these countries, they will adapt it and make the innovations. As a result, these innovations would change their country and give it an edge over other nations.  
  
On the one hand, the phenomenon called brain drain could occur amoung every countries. To be specific, the large number of students who initially go internationally for educational purposes may decide to settle as a resident because of progressive living condition of other regions. Ultimately, the students' intellectual property might be no longer possessed by their home country. Consequently, the brain drain problem would have a big impact on their country's workforce.  
  
In conclusion, despite the development of studying abroad is positive, I only partly agree with this. While a country would greatly gain the rich stream of knowledge, there is a chance to brain drain happening and inflicting its human resources. After thorough analysis this subject, it is believed that government should seek the viable solutions to curb this problem.
Although the positivity ...its best students.  
Excellent work! Your opinion is clearly supported by discussion reasons. This will definitely boost your TA score based on discussion response format.  
  
Sadly, your reasoning paragraph is where your error occurred. Your first reasoning paragraph represents reasons why students should study abroad in a positive light. You should have used some negative aspect or spin to make the paragraph support your opinion. Remember you always need to present 2 reasons backing up your opinion. Spin it. Make a positive for a student a negative for the country. Never say it has benefits for the country because you should still be on the "partly disagree" reasoning line.  
  
After thorough analysis ...curb this problem.  
Never present an unrelated personal opinion or suggestion in your reverse paraphrase. Always stick to the basic preceding discussion summary. Adding unrequired information will not increase your score but could be considered a score reduction reason.
## The given diagram depicts how are fresh tea leaves and tea bags manufactured.

  
Overall, there are eight primary stages of producing tea bags, from the initial withering leaves to the eventual packaging and selling to distributors.  
At the first stage, all leaves are put in a specific machine, where contains heated air and wither to dry out tea leaves. Then, they are crushed and torn to be milled into a milling machine in the next step. Afterward, various kinds of tea leaves, which have different sizes, are sifted by sieves. The former leaves are mixed and added some flavors such as peppermint, ginger. The process continues with filling up the small trays with roughly 2 grams of tea leaves. Once there are enough fresh tea leaves in small boxes, they are sealed in bags. At the final stage, tea bags are packaged and available to be sold on the market.  
  
Pls check if there are any mistakes here
The essay cannot be renewed - properly without the reference image. However, I can offer a brief review of your work since the errors are evident to the reader. Though you wrote 150 words, the presentation is incorrect. You need to have 3 separate paragraphs that represent the following :  
  
- summary overview + tending statement  
- first half (4 parts) of the manufacture process  
- last 4 manufacturing procedures  
  
Never use a single paragraph presentation as that is not an academic writing format. This format shows a lack of English writing familiarity, particulary with formatting and grammar rules. Consider reading the other task 1 writing samples her to learn from. You won't regret it. The basic rule of writing this task is, writing just 150 words will not guarantee a passing score. A combination of several scoring elements assure that.
## describing the charts of adult education

  
  
There are two charts demonstrating a research about adult education. The bar chart represents adult-studying reasons while the pie chart shows the way over 18-year-old people should divide studying costs.  
  
In the first one, 40 percent of mature people got interested in subject and 38 percent of them wanted to achieved qualifications. The second most popular reasons for the studying at the such age are supporting the current job with 22%, preparing for promotion with 20% as well as enjoying learning with 20%. Also, the percentages of mature individuals wanting to switch their jobs and hanging out with others are ,respectively, 12% and 9%.  
  
In the second one, the education fees were shared quite evenly with the most amount for individual at 40%, followed by employer at 35% and lastly taxpayer at 25%.  
  
In conclusion, adults have various personal motivations to get further education, which is why they have to pay the biggest share of a study course instead of taxpayer or employer.  
  
*
There are 2 images provided but notending statements represented. You need to present 2 trending sentences in the summary overview as well. One for each image to help properly summarize the discussion highlights.  
  
wanted to achieved qualifications.  
Beware of the time reference indicators. You have a confusing sentence here. When you say " wanted" that indicates a failure to achieve in the past. While "achieved" means a successful past achievement. Which one are you trying to convey?  
  
This in a 3 paragraph essay. You cannot have a stand alone single sentence presentation to represent that. Since this a task 1 essay based on reports rather than a personal opinion, a conclusion should not be included in the final presentation.
## airport visitors 1998-2003

  
  
The given table compares and contrasts data on the changes in the total of travellers utilizing three large British flag carriers over a five-year timespan from 1998 to 2003.  
  
It is apparent from the table that whilst all of the three categories enjoyed exponential growth, the figures for Gatwick were always the highest except in 2000.  
  
Looking at the details, as regards Healthrow airport, it witnessed a surge in its data, overtaking the figure for the Gatwick airport in 2000 at 48.2 million. Having suffered a moderate downswing to 33.2 million in 2002, the figures then went through a remarkable increase, booming to 45.6 million a year later. Likewise, the Gatwick airport underwent a gradual rise in its data from 36.5 million in 1998 to 51.1 million in 2002, followed by a soar to 69.3 million in 2003.  
  
With respect to the Stansted airport, its figure in 1998 constituted the lowest at 17.3 million. Having significant upswings between 1998 and 2001, the figures then remained unaltered, levelling off at 43.3 million from 2001 to 2003.  
  
*
British flag carriers  
Flag carriers are airlines. The reference points used are airports. Be careful with your references. You just created an error filled reference which means you misinformed the person reading your report. This lowers the TA score immediately.  
  
overtaking the figure for the Gatwick airport  
Which was? Use complete comparison data. When referred to in the chart, it must be included in the report. That is why it is mentioned, for report clarity and efficiency. You did that laterin the essay and it was one of the better informed sentence presentations. It was a good reference point for that comparison portion.  
  
You have few errors in your presentation. The existing errors have score lowering results in the L.R. and Ct C sections though. Be very careful with your writing to avoid major errors like these.
***According to Confucius, education is the key to success.  
## Do you agree with this?

  
Write an essay of 250 words to give your answer.***  
  
It can be undeniable that education is beneficial to the considerable growth of economics and advanced technologies. According to Confucius, education is the key to success. I completely agree with this statement, and my view will be explained in this essay.  
  
Firstly, education facilitates people pursuing the high position of their jobs through widening the knowledge and fostering personal skills. For example, attending school is one of the most efficient ways for students to obtain knowledge about the surrounding world, such as the economics, sciences,...which are later their future careers. Besides, school tutors people to develop their essential skills: critical thinking, time-management,... which are then applied on their jobs.  
  
Furthermore, education is one of the vital contributors to cultivating people to have good manners. At school, learners are tutored to discriminate moral reasoning that also facilitates them making ethical decisions. People highly appreciate the individuals behaving in a good way in the workplace rather than personals with immoral awareness, which results in companies' collapse due to wrong decisions.  
  
Taking everything into account, education permits people to broaden knowledge, develop individuals' skills as well as tutor them to become well-educated behavior. With the two aforementioned reasons, I firmly agree that education is the key to success.
You did not meet the 250 word requirement. When you do this during an actual test, this could garner you an automatic failing score depending upon the word requirement scoring consideration. This also shows that you chose to ignore the writing instructions, which means you most likely did not understand the minimum writing requirements. If you cannot follow the instructions provided then you risk failing the test.  
  
education is the key to success. I  
Don't cite the very same quote from the original. Explain what you understand based on what he said instead. You might scoreless for cut and paste references. Prove your English comprehension and paraphrasing skills whenever you can.  
  
time-management,... which  
English grammar rules are clear about punctuation mark usage. Use it one at a time, never successively. Pick one and use it.
Hi , could you please review my essay. I would appreciate it if you could help me :D  
  
**Topic:**  
## I've just seen a brilliant program about dolphins on television.

  
***Which program have you enjoyed recently? How much television do you watch?***  
  
Nowadays, the electronic items are developing and expand around of local market and foreign market . Inside this, electronic items as laptop, telephone or cell phones more popular in the Vietnam central, because it attract more younger people and elder people, oldest people use it, Follow survey, Over 90% of people using laptop for watching movies, news such as BBC channel, Rachel and Jun channel...Recently, I like watching about chemistry of Thoi Son 2 channel by Laptop because when I watched it , I could expanding and improving about chemistry abilities and how to modulation it. In addition, I watched it because I extremely like chemistry and I want to become good scientist. Of course. Besides watching Thoi Son 2 channel that I also watching some channels in my freetime and total over 20 cannels or program such as Veritasium, jomaier.... Channels. I watch it for relaxing and let go of stress after do hard work or hard study. Moreover, I also watch it for expanding and knowledge about galaxy and interest things all of the world.
The first half of your essay is nothing but an unrelated information presentation. This is actually a statement response rather than an essay. There are only 2 qquestions you need to respond to. The direct response is a requirement for this presentation. Bluff sentences meant to extendthe discussion without a relation to the actual topic does not help the presentation. These surveys and percentage of viewership, other than yours, has no actual value to the presentation.  
  
The second half of your essay also runs opposite to the questions provided. You are asked a program. Singular. Your response is in the plural form. That is a task discussion failure as you did not respond in singular form to the question. neither did you tell the reader how must I.V. you watch in hourly or percentage form.
## expenditures on cell phone and residential phone services

  
  
The given line chart illustrates the mean amount of money people in the US spend on mobile phone and landline consumption every twelve over 9 periods.  
  
It is noticeable that cell phone usage rocketed rapidly and reach the highest point in the last year of the period while the expenditures on the residential phone service witnessed a dramatic fall.  
  
Starting in 2001 when the expense of using the cellular phone was just over 200$. However, it experienced a remarkable increase to 300$ in 2002 and a slight rise in one year later and continuously upward. In contrast, the payment for landline phones declined significantly the figure in 2001 was approximately 700$ and dropped to 600$ in 2002 and have no stop signal in the next period.  
  
The two-line intersected in 2006 at 550$ and each followed its trend afterward. From this time to the last period time of the chart, the consumption of mobile phone climbed up considerably and reach the peak at over 700$ in 2010. In opposite trend, the figure of the money spend on landline nonstop decreased and the number in 2010 was 400. Over the whole period, the money on cell phone arise by 500$ while the residential phone once dropped about 300$  
  
*
every twelve over 9 periods.  
What? This reference has no meaning. Perhaps you mis-translated from your native tongue to English? This is why itis important to use individual sentences when writing your summary. More importantly, youshould make sure to review your work before submission to allow you a chance to correct errors that affect sections of your score.  
  
money spend  
Time reference /GRA mistake. The information is from past information. What is the error? youp. Dense usage. This is a past tense presentation. Again, you failed to check your work for score reducingproblems.  
  
While the potential to get a passing exists based on your understanding of the graph, your lack of editing prior to scoring will cause you to fail based on avoidable mistakes.
**Question:**  
***In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry.***  
## Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

  
  
It is undeniable that nowadays, farming practices are facilitated by the development of many modern innovations despite the fact that there is a soaring figure of people undergoing famine. This essay will elaborate on the leading cause of this problem and practical solutions to overcome this hardship.  
  
There are two main factors attributed to the increase in hunger all over the world. Firstly, in many countries, especially underdeveloped ones, farmers are financially incapable of purchasing sophisticated machines. They continue following old-fashioned methods and failing to apply technologies in their crops, in turns, their outcomes cannot meet the demand of the increasing population. Secondly, the frequent occurrence of natural disasters is another reason for the hunger issue. Many East-South Asian and African nations, in which have to deal with floods and droughts annually, have fewer opportunities to develop agricultural activities than others. While these catastrophes have gigantic damage to crops, farmers have no solutions to protect their crops but accept the truth and prepare for the next one. As a result, many of these nations' citizens do not have enough food to maintain their lives.  
  
However, world hunger can be reduced by some effective solutions. The governments can support the farmers by lending them an amount of money in order to buy some automatic and labor-saving machines and also some high-quality plant seeds. This measure helps farmers save time and enhance crop yield. Furthermore, thriving nations can provide underdeveloped countries with sufficient aid such as fundings and agricultural machinery. This not only creates better opportunities for farmer increase the production of food but also strengthen the relationship among regions and countries.  
  
In conclusion, the lack of modern technologies applied in farming and the devastation of natural disasters can be ascribed to the increasing global hunger. The national governments and international organizations can take steps to alleviate this problem.
Be conscious of GRA requirements. You do not seem to be familiar with punctuation marks and howto use these. You also rely mostly on run- on sentences for your presentation. There is a big difference - between a complex sentence and a run.on. Please look there 2 topics up and learn the lessons to help you do better in the writing tasks.  
  
This essay will... this hardship.  
This is not a usable discussion statement. There is no need to repeat the instructions when direct questions are provided. These questions, when responded to directly, allow you to clearly address the task accuracy opinion requirements. You clear answers help the examiner decide upon what your starting TA score should be.  
  
[~~quote=Giang87]There are two m...all over the world.[/quote]~~  
Filler sentences such as these are unnecessary when you provide a proper thesis statement in the first paragraph. starting with a score improving topic sentence introduction would be more useful.  
  
thriving nations  
Since you addressed a government responsibility first, the private food sector responsibility to solve the problem , since they are the global food suppliers, should be addressed instead of rich nation responsibilities in relation to food support for poor nations.
## the positives and drawbacks of globalisation

  
  
In the today's world, globalisation has followed upward trend through the internet, air travel, trade and popular culture. Therefore, many people consider that the rapid communication between countries thanks to globalisation is great. In this essay, I will discuss both positive and negative aspect of globalisation and illustrate my own outlook.  
  
On the one hand, the globalisation could make interaction between nations increase that would bring many benefits. First of all, the profile and image of a country could be increase in the world through worldwide integration. Thus, the foreign investors might be invest money to build factories or companies in the country since they want to take advantages which they could be lack. As a result, it could create more jobs for locals and thus boost economic development in both the domestic and foreign countries. For example, many toy companies like the Lego are built in the China instead of Japan which has high quality technology because the cost for labor in this country is cheap.  
  
On the other hand, this situation could have negative impacts on some countries, especially developing countries. At the present, the globalisation could create a harsh competition among countries. The main reason is that transportation commodities between the nations would grow through the globalisation. Therefore, the people would have many different kinds, prices and quality levels of products form foreign countries. It could generate a competition with local enterprises which may have to close their business or go bankrupt.  
  
In conclusion, the globalisation could have many positive influences, but it still creates some drawbacks due to the competitions among countries. However, I believe that also could provide motivation for the development of own country.
I will discuss both positive and negative aspect of globalisation  
If, I am not mistaken, you have mis-analyzed the prompt. Based upon what I know of the original prompt (which you should have provided ) , the discussion instruction is actually :  
  
*...its negative side should not be forgotten. What is your view? Discuss.*  
  
Owing to the actual discussion instruction, it appears that your response is not provided in the expected format. You wither provided a clear % not provided 2 justification topics for the reasoning paragraph. Originally presented as a single opinion statement with 2 reasoning paragraphs this should not be presented via a comparative discussion.  
  
You should have decided whether the negatives can be forgotten or not. It is clear, when considering the overall prompt, that you did not understand the discussion requirements, which led to the low scoring presentation. If you feel I am in error with my analysis, then you should have provided the prompt with you essay.
## Writing task 1 - information on the Weather for reliable forecast

  
  
The diagram below shows how the Australia Bureau of Meteorology collects up to the minute information on the Weather in order to produce reliable forecast.  
  
It is widely known that the Australia Bureau of Meteorology plays a vital role in provide precisely and trustworthy information about the weather so how does it work?  
  
Firstly it gather incoming information from all around the globe through satellite, radar and drifting bouy, which each of them will provide data for the bureau to analyze.For instances, the satellite will send photo which help to predict the weather phenomenon like storm, raining or snowing weather. The radar will give radar screens which will helps detecting any below the earth surface activity and finally the drifting bouy will provide synoptic chart about the ocean flow.  
  
Secondly, all the information gathered will be analyzing to prepare for the forecasting in form of chart, diagram, visual implementation in order to make the forecast more accessible to the average dwell.  
  
Lastly, the Australia Bureau of Meteorology will sent data about the weather to broadcast networks such as TV newsreader, radio stations and even recorded announcement to help people know about the upcoming weather.
The diagram below  
What sort of diagram? Your identification is incomplete. It does not help the reader create a mental picture of the data you are presenting.  
  
up to the minute information  
What sort of information ? Summarize it. Where is it collated? By whom?  
  
~~It is widely known ...how does it work?~~  
This is not part of the task 1 data from the image. This sentence style can only be used in a task 2 essay presentation. The task 1 essay is focused solely on data reporting based on the image provided.  
  
instances  
Singular V. plural problem. The succeeding presentation is based on a singular example so refer to "instance" instead.  
  
Secondly  
This should be included in the preceding paragraph since it is still related information. A concise report sticks related information together in the paragraphusing proper sentence formations.  
  
\* Limited review due to lack of image.