You under wrote in the second paragraph and overwrote in the third paragraph. Kindly remember that you are supposed to use a paragraph format for your presentation and that depending upon the type of question posed, the defense paragraphs should range from 2-3 paragraphs. When writing a dis/agree essay discussion, you only need 2 reasoning paragraphs composed of one of these 2 representations:  
  
- A strong reasoning paragraph discussion plus a separate example paragraph to reiterate your reason  
- A strong reasoning paragraph with an example sentence built in plus another reasoning with example paragraph  
  
The latter format can be used if you have multiple reasons ( no more than 2 reasons) that you believe will help to strengthen your overall score in terms of C&C, LR, and GRA considerations. Otherwise, a single reason with a strong example paragraph will work just as well for your scoring needs.  
  
In this case, you used several reasoning topics but did not really properly explain and provide an example for each. You are not scored on the number of reasons you provide. Rather, you are scored on the clear explanation you provide through connected reasons and examples that go from one paragraph to the next. Clarity is more important than word count in the Task 2 essay. It is useless to write almost 300 words if you did not have the opportunity to develop your explanation properly. The development requirements for each paragraph are:  
  
- A strong reasoning sentence at the start  
- A clear explanation of the reason  
- An example that will help clarify your explanation  
- A transition sentence that will connect this paragraph to the discussion topic of the next paragraph.  
  
Please note that if you paid more attention to your spelling instead of word count, you would have caught spelling, grammar, and other vocabulary errors in your work. These errors should have been corrected prior to the submission of the essay. That is, if you had bothered to spell check and edit first which clearly, you either failed to do and did not care to do before submitting this essay.  
  
commuicate = communicate  
  
... But also - requires a comma after also  
  
You do not capitalize a word after a comma. That is still lower case in writing provided it is not a proper noun or title of a person or book. Hence "Nevertheless. As" should be "Nevertheless, as..."  
  
An Oxford comma should have been used in the series, "anyone, especially students, teachers or researchers". The comma should come after the word "teachers".  
  
For a more academic tone, do not use basic English phrases such as "more and more". Rather, simply say "more". There does not need to be an exaggeration in the presentation. It sounds childish and non-academic.  
  
There are still other errors located in your essay. These have mostly to do with the smooth GRA representation and proper English sentence formation. However, the errors I pointed out here should be a good place to start. The rest of the errors should be corrected and weaknesses improved as you continue with your practice essay. The good news is, you understood the prompt requirement and you were on point with your discussion to a great degree.