dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
The essay is definitely too short to receive a passing mark since deductions will apply for writing only 223 / 250 words. This is actually an automatic faling score essay because of the lack of word count but minimal scores will still be awarded for the other scoring considerations. These scores will not just be passing ones since the writer did not meet the minimum writing standard for the task.  
  
While the topic may be considered a controversy, it would be best to avoid making such exaggerated references in these types of discussions since the writer is expected to restate a direct opinion alone. A direct representation avoids the pitfalls of overexplaining the tast in the restatement. Another problem with this paragraph is the lack of direct response to the discussion instructions. The writer is always expected to respond with applicable topic sentences to the questions or writing instructions. Scores are lost when all the writer presents is a repetition of the discussion instruction. Doing so indicates that the writer is not capable of presenting a summarized topic form as required for the task.  
  
As a word reference, "regrading" was misused in this presentation. The writer should look up the meaning of the word. It does not mean what he tried to make it infer in his sentence. This will negatively affect his word usage and grammar scores. Never use a word if one is not sure of the meaning. The writer will not lose points for using simple English words that properly apply to his work, but he will lose scoring advantages if he does not properly use words in the presentation.  
  
Concluding paragraphs should be composed of at least 40 words. Use 2 sentences at the least in this section since it should present a summarized form of the previous discussion. Points cannot be provided for paragraphs that do not meet the requirements of the essay.
## Technology is affecting family relationships in many ways

  
  
In this day and age, the development of technology is believed to have numerous consequences on the interaction of family members. This development has both pros and cons, whereas the drawbacks far outweigh the benefits.  
  
To begin with, there are probably a couple of reasons why technology benefits family relationships. Firstly, family members can easily contact others whenever they are far away from each other. Almost everyone, even children and the elderly people, have their own phones with various applications installed so they can call or text other members effortlessly. For example, a student goes to the university far away from his town, when he misses his parents he can have a video call with them by using social media on his phone. Secondly, people can use technology as a tool for retaining some remarkable memories. As aforementioned, everyone has their own mobile phones so it is possible to take pictures, videos. These memorable images can be shared with family members, this is a good way for a family to bond together. Thus, technology has improved relationships in some ways.  
  
On the contrary, disadvantages far outweigh the advantages. Firstly, due to technology, face-to-face conservation seems to be less effective among the members in a family. Due to the Internet, people can make many new friends online; however, they spend so much time on social media that they don't have time for relatives. Secondly, there are some differences between the young and the elderly's favorable trends. Young people often care about funny things shared on Tik Tok, etc... while the elderly people are attracted to something more different. For example, young people love to post the memes on instagram, twitter... but our grandparents are more likely to read more online news. Because of these contrast favors, the young and the old don't usually have some common topic to share with each other. Last but not least, technology is way more common with young people; therefore the young can fastly learn some bad trends that affect their regular behavior. Adults may not appreciate these kinds of attitudes, this leads to depreciated behavior and even arguments between parents and their children.  
  
To sum up, the evolution of technology has brought us some good effects on our relationships; however, there is no doubt that it also badly affects human's interaction.
The writer should refrain from presenting a personal opinion within an advantage or disadvantage prompt presentation. That is because the writer is not being asked to support one side of the discussion. This is a general discussion type that only requires the writer's interpretation of each side of the discussion. He must be unbiased in his discussion.  
  
It must be pointed out however that the writer neither presented correct prompt restatement or writer's opinion. He cannot change the discussion from advantage and disadvantage to pros and cons or benefits or drawbacks. These are separate prompt discussion types that are required for specific essay types. He cannot mix the prompt instructions into a single presentation. His presentation should specifically present one advantage and one disadvantage topic to produce a discussion outline for the examiner.  
  
The word "probably" can never factor into a task 2 discussion. The writer must come across as knowledgeable and authoritative of the topic presented as these uncertain references weaken the cohesiveness of his discussion. His second paragraph is a clear depiction of a biased writer's opinion, which runs counter to the original discussion instruction.It is because of these continued discussion alterations that the essay cannot pass the test. The writer proves to be unable to follow the correct response format for the essay due to his confusion regarding the actual prompt discussion requirement.
Will it obtain a passing score?  
  
***Government should spend money on education rather than on infrastructure.***  
## Do you agree or disagree?

  
  
Some people claim that a country should expend money on academic purposes instead of building massive amenity constructions. I completely agree with the given statement that government should priorities schooling for the development of human beings. In this essay, I will pustulate my opinion with some relevant examples and supporting ideas.  
  
To commence with, studying has made a man perfect in every aspect of life. A person will have a prosperous life if he/she achieves a high level of degree. In addition, people give respect to those who are professionally trained in their selected fields. For instance, Einstein is admired all over the world for his scientific researches and inventions over many billionaires of the globe. Furthermore, education gives a well-known personality and wealthy life to individuals seeking for it.  
  
Moreover, the current available facilities and technologies, that we use in our daily life, are the product of high-level knowledge. It is a proven fact that knowledge is the base of a country's development in every part of governance; as well as, the countries, which standardized their educational system, are known as the powerful nations in the planet earth. To cite an example, Japan had focused mainly on their youngsters' studies before becoming a well-developed nation. Hence, nations are ranked regarding their academic achievements.  
  
To conclude, knowledge is the chief element for the improvement of a country which gives their countrymen the facilities and convenience they need in their life span rather than constructing the infrastructure which will be a temporary welfare.  
  
Word count : 253
The writer has improper knowledge of English words. The use of incorrect vocabulary throughout the essay will result in a low to failing LR score. The following are the improperly used words in the essay with the corresponding meaning that should explain why the score will have to be failing in that section:  
  
amenity - an agreeable way or manner; courtesy; civility:any feature that provides comfort, convenience, or pleasure  
pustulate - to cause to form pustules; covered with **pustules** - a small elevation of the skin containing pus.  
  
These are college level words that were used to the detriment of the LR score. The writer is using English words without knowing the meaning behind them, resulting in confusing and unrelated sentence ideas / formations. This will definitely negatively affect both the LR and GRA scores.  
  
As far as the discussion goes, the writer explains the benefits of spending on education but he does not explain why money should not be spent on infrastructure. The supporting paragraphs should explain why infrastructure spending should be lessened in favor of spending more on education. Stick to the 2 discussion topics provided in the original prompt. Do not alter the discussion focus by creating incorrect personal opinion statements. Use the compare and contrast format for writing this type of essay. Prove why the mejority opinion is not the one that the public should support.
The first body paragraph has missed the task achievement point since it is not logical : A person will have a prosperous life if .... In addition, people give respect to those who are ...  
  
Furthermore, education gives ...  
==> there is no connection between 2 questions I highlighted as they support 2 main ideas that are different with each other and different from the main idea you give. The same with the last sentence, you need to choose 1 of 3 ideas to analyze clearly and logical to it.
## Consumption of energy in the USA

  
  
The graph below gives information from 1 2008 report about consumption of energy in the USA since 1980 with projections until 2030.  
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.  
  
My posts:  
The infographic illustrates the USA from 1980 to 2030 in terms of the proportion of energy production.  
  
From a general respective, there was an increase in the number of energy consumption namely Petrol and Oil, Coal, Natural Gas, Nuclear, Solar/Wind, but the opposite was true for the figure for Hydropower.Petrol and Oil was by far the most popular energy usage however hydropower generated the least amount of energy in the USA  
  
( I just write overview and introduction )  
  
*
While inforgraphic is a post college level word, it does not accomplish the task requirement in this instance as a specific reference to the image is required. The writer could have still used the term, but included the type of infographic to meet the information requirements of the paragraph. The summary overview is too short to be considered a complete summary. It must contain at least 2 or 3 sentences to offer a true rundown of the provided information. Choose the highlights and work those into a complete paragraph presentation.  
  
The trending statement will lower the GRA score for the essay since it was not properly divided into individual sentences. The representative individual sentences will comprise the complete trending paragraph. A run-on sentence such as the one presented is not going to be given a passing score as it does not meet sentence formation requirements in the English language. It lacks thought clarity and proper idea presentation. All paragraphs for the task 1 essay should have a minimum of 3 sentences, no more than 5. There is also a missing full stop / period at the end of the second paragraph.
***Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.***  
  
## Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

  
  
In some current years, human has more negative healthy issues and it is argued that increasing the number of sport centres is the most effective mehthod for improving public healthy. In my opinion, however, I totally disagree with this statement.  
  
On the one hand, there are some reasons makes people believe that taking part in sports clubs is the best way to enhance their health. It is clear that exercise is a measure which positive impact on human's body. Therefore, increasing the popularity of sports aminities gives people have more chances to improve their health. For example, yoga is more popular physical activity for young people and middle-aged women to stay healthy and keep fit.  
  
On the other hand, I would argue that there are many necessary elements to improve public health without sports aminities. It can be seen that, dominant people who paid for annual gym membership falied finishing whole coures. I think it is most cruital that people need to enhance their awareness about potential health problem. Therefore healthy campaigns are particulary essential because it is easiest method to spread knowledge to human. Futhermore, food products which people eat on daily basis aslo unless important. To have good heath, people need to eat foodsuff which supplies their body sufficient nutrients and vitamin.  
  
In conclusion, the growing prevalence of sports facilities has brought a wide range of health benefits for people; yet, I personally believe that raising public awareness through health campaigns would have a more positive impact on improving people's health.
The main reason that this essay will receive an overall failing score has to do with the lack of proper sentence structuring and word usage in the paragraphs. The writer seemingly writes in broken English, a method that is used by English as a second language learners who are at the beginner level of English learning. It must be said that the writer has the right understanding of the the discussion requirement but his lack of proper English thought process proved to be the problem with his presentation. The grammar is not very good because it is hindered by misspelled words, incorrect word usage, and incoherent sentences.  
  
Unless these problems are addressed in the next essay, the writer will not be able to improve his score beyond a failing score. My advice to the student is to focus on his grammar improvement overall before proceeding to write more task 1 or task 1 essays. Practice sentence formation using simple English words for now. If possible, use fill in the blank word choice exercises for sentence completion to help address this weakness in the writer's sentence formation ability. Once these sections improve, the other problems in relation to essay discussion presentations may be addressed. Focus on the basic grammar issues for now. Those are the severe problems at this time.
*Hi, I'm learning to write ielts task 2 essay, thanks for your assessment in advance. Would you mind focusing on assessing my word choice, task achievement, grammar, coherence and cohesion?*  
  
**TOPIC:  
## Many people try to balance work and other parts of their life. However, this is very difficult to do.

  
*What are the problems associated with this?  
What is the best way to achieve a better balance?***  
  
These days, people tend to work with intensity as they aspire to a successful career. However, apart from work, life includes other aspects, so it can be very challenging for one to strive for a balance between professional and personal life. This essay aims to examine the two major issues that often stem from this social dysfunction and offer the most plausible solution.  
  
It goes without saying/ It is apparent that these issues are health concerns and breakdown of family relations/ Lack of strong family bonds), which are linked to an excessive workload. Firstly, taking too many responsibilities of a job that are higher than one's available time and ability can lead to lack of rest affecting negatively mental and physical wellness. For example, workers who are often inundated with office duties may not get enough sleep and are more likely at risk of/ are at a higher risk of depression and cardiovascular diseases. Secondly, when individuals opt to spend most of the day in the workplace, they might hardly see their loved ones. Consequently, a poor interaction with family members would occur, facilitating weakening the ties. Parents that overcommit to work are a good case in point. Being absent from home regularly, they would rarely communicate with their offspring and two sides would not be close and understand each other as well.  
  
Nevertheless, this scenario could be treated/ remedied/ mitigated/tackled by arranging a realistic timetable comprising activities in both personal and professional life. In other words, people should note down things that need to be done in order of priority and then limit time to complete each one, so that they can allocate their resources accordingly. This could not only help a person stay satisfied at work, but also have time to relax, recharge the batteries and strengthen the relationships at home. For example, employees can use applications to make a to-do list and set time for it. Because if they are put under pressure to finish a task in a certain amount of time, they will likely focus on truly important things and work more efficiently, thus, would reach targets in the company on the dot easier and get back to home earlier.  
  
In conclusion, although there are many problems related to balancing different plates of work, family and other things, it can still be achievable by designing a suitable schedule.  
  
For editing, content, and formatting needs please contact us at essayforum.com@gmail.com. Thank you! EF
The lack of a direct response to the 2 questions provided resulted in the lack of a clear writer's opinion presentation in this task. There is no thesis statement upon which the examiner will be able to judge how applicable and relevant the succeeding discussion paragraphs will be in relation to the given prompt. Since the first paragraph is used to assess the writer's ability to respond to given questions quickly and coherently, as he would in a classroom discussion setting, being unable to do so in the written form, where he has more time to think about his response to the questions, is not a good sign for the exam taker. The examiner will not award points for merely repeating the discussion instructions.
***Environmental protection is the responsibility of governments, not individuals as individuals can do too little.***  
## To what extent do you agree or disagree?

  
  
Problems relating to the environment have nearly never ceased to cause deep concerns to humans. Some take the view that the leaders of a country should hold accountable for the environmental protection as this practice is regarded as an onerous mission for individuals to take on. Analyzing the ability of individuals to recycle old things and reduce the amount of carbon emission by using public transport will illustrate the idea that individuals are capable of protecting the environment, not just the governments.  
  
Firstly, individuals could recycle the used materials to preserve the environment surrounding them. For example, Go Green, one of the leading environmental organizations established by environment-conscious Vietnamese members, has succeeded in invigorating millions of Vietnamese to recycle the receptacles after using them. As an individual organization could have the capability to raise people's awareness of the environment, the prospect of other individuals could have a similar impact on the whole society is probably no longer far-fetched. Thus, it is clear that not only the governments but also individuals could exert a huge positive impact on environmental improvement.  
  
Secondly, the upsurge in using public transport by individuals has the tremendous effect to put a damper on carbon emissions, which are the precursor to the degraded environment. A 2021 research carried out by the Vietnamese environment Institute shows the CO2 level in metropolises in the Northern part of Vietnam plunged as a result of changes in the commute habit of people. An inordinate number of people have utilized public transit as their main means of getting around instead of using personal vehicles such as motorbikes or cars. This example illustrates the idea that every individual can be a force of change to enhance environmental quality. Hence, it should be reassured that governments are not the sole force that has enough capacity to deal with complex environmental issues.  
  
In conclusion, I strongly agree that besides the governments, individuals have a crucial role in environmental preservation by taking simple actions such as reusing old materials and taking the advantage of public transit. Therefore, the public should join hands with the governments to uphold the quality of the environment we inhabit.
The essay will immediately receive a failing score in the preliminary TA assessment because it does not repost in the correct format. The expected response delivery was instead placed in the conclusion. That emotional response must be presented twice in the same essay. The first in the restatement, the second in the reverse paraphrase of the concluding summary. Although the writer wrote more than the necessary word count, his lack of attention to response detail is what proved to be detrimental to his final score. His first paragraph provided a prompt discussion deviation, which cannot be overlooked by the examiner. It does not create the proper foundation for the succeeding discussion paragraphs and therefore, made the overall essay non-passing in the final assessment.
hi, I'm not a professor, but I'm hoping this will help you.  
Your essay includes too many details and the limitation of the IELTS writing is just about 250 words.  
You need to understand the IELTS format. In this kind of writing, you have to answer directly whether you agree or not in the beginning part. Overall part has to include the main ideas and need to be focused.  
  
However, I am really impressed by your level of vocab
## percentage of car trips by purpose and gender of drivers

  
  
Task 1:  
The bar chart compares the proportion of car trips made by male and female drivers for 8 purposes in the year of 2005. Overall, the initial impression is that commuting to work was the most common reason for car travel for both men and women. It is also evident that visiting town, bank, running errands, visiting friends and recreation are the categories that witnessed the biggest difference between the percentage of males and females doing these activities.  
  
In 2005, about 53% of males used their cars to drive to work, which was considerably higher than that of females, at about 37%. By contrast, there were slightly more women used cars for shopping than men, 17% compared to 10%. Similarly, the percentages of men and women driving to courses were fairly similar, at 8% and 12% respectively.  
  
The differences between the proportion of male and female drivers could be seen when we compare the remaining categories. The percentages of women driving to bank, running errands and to visit friends were 8%, 10%,7% respectively, which were strikingly higher than those for men, at approximately 4%. On the contrary, while cars were used by roughly 12% and 8% of men for recreation and town visits respectively, fewer women favoured driving for these purposes, at nearly 3% for both activities.  
  
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