dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
Task 2:  
## Some people think spoken communication is more powerful than written communication.

  
***To what extent do you agree or disagree?***  
  
Given the rise of heart-touching speeches, sublime propagandas and emotionally inspiring declaration, many a person have purported that writings, in this modern world, must be something woefully inferior to conversations. I, however, vehemently oppose such a claim. Howbeit indeed appearing somewhat low-key, compared to speeches, every other piece of writing still is inherently crucial to this civilization.  
  
On the one hand, writing practices empower critical thinking. By practicing which, it polishes up our very abilities to put statements in right order, along with picking up the most appropriate words to fit in the context. We, after all, can emotionally brag about every-made-up-thing without even knowing what we are saying, yet still get others engaged in which. Nevertheless, should we be that heedless in writing, the end-product will be any less of an unreadable text, nor will it appeal to anyone.  
  
On the other hand, as writing has only a restricted place for emotions, every piece of written words hardly tolerates biases, personal judgment, nor any emotionally-distorted arguments. Writing is a place of criticism and skepticism, yet rarely soaked in enraged emotions as in speeches. As a rule, people must have all too often found speeches more inspiring, emotional and heart-touching because of this very reason.  
  
Nonetheless, the impacts of speeches still appear insurmountable to writings. Spoken communication, after all, costs less mind power, whilst appealing to more people, and inherently more able to be reached out by more people.  
  
In a nutshell, writings still are critical to many people, for they propose the opportunity to better one's critical thinking, logical order and word choices, whilst doing away with biases, which are the core of speeches.  
  
Any comment would be appreciated. If possible, please give me a score for this essay.
Scoring of essays are a part of our private review and URGENT review services. It is no longer part of the free essay review services. You may consider one of the two advanced review suggestions by emailing us directly. Our email address is in the homepage.  
  
**WARNING! STUDENT SCORING = ACCOUNT SUSPENSION !!!**  
  
You are obviously trying to impress the examiner by using arachaic English words. That will have the opposite effect. You are scored not based on how well you know old English words. You are scored on your knowledge of current English words in relation to pop culture. You have to sound natural. Use everyday English words. That will help you score better overall.  
  
Your use of flowery and complicated English words did not help your paragraph restatement and overall presentation. Your writing is uncomfortable for the reader. You should be focusing on the clarity and understanding of your paragraphs / sentences, rather than trying to dig into an unnecessary presentation of complicated discussions.  
  
Your English statements actually lack clarity. For example, " writing practices empower critical thinking". That statement does not make sense. However, saying "writing empowers a person with critical thinking" then the presented statement makes sense to the reader. This is the overall problem of your presentation, there is no clarity in the statements you made. It confuses the reader and provides a stressful reading experience. This problem will result in the lowest possible GRA score for your essay.
**Some people think that mental strength is the most important factor for success in sports. However, some others believe that it is more important to have strong and fit people. Discuss both views and give your opinions.**  
  
It is often said that emotional health is the key factor for a successful athlete. However, many, including myself, argue that the physical condition of a person is far more necessary in sports.  
  
On the one hand, it is undoubted that without a strong and healthy mind, it is extremely difficult for people to compete with others in sports. Audiences usually expect a victory from their favourite clubs, therefore, sportspeople are often put under a huge amount of pressure when they play for their national or provincial teams. If players cannot bear the pressure which viewers place on them, the possibility is that their minds will have a detrimental effect on their performance or even their life after the match. For example, many players have attempted to commit suicide after being criticised by their supporters.  
  
On the other hand, my view is that sports are where athletes show how strong and fit they are. The purpose of sports is getting in shape and active, people should always aim for that outcome when doing sports. If the importance of physical strength is underestimated and people spend more time praciting their mental system, sports would then be seen as an activity to promote sedentary lifestyles, which society obviously do not want. In addition, audicences enjoy wathcing sports which are physically demanding and challenging, such as running or footbal. In these games, winning is nearly impossible and serious injuries could easily occur if players do not have a good physical condition, even those professional ones.  
  
In conclusion, mental fitness plays a vital role in sports. Nevertheless, I strongly believe that it is the physical health that brings victories and a successful career for sportspeople due to the fact that sports should encourage active lifestyles and they are physically competitive.  
  
Any comments would be highly appreciated!
This is an analytical essay response. Your opinion must show a consideration of the 2 public points of view before you present your personal opinion. This is written normally, as a 5 paragraph essay as it requires clear explanations of the following:  
  
Reason 1: Strength is the most important factor... using public reference points and opinions to justify the support for this opinion  
Reason 2: It is more important to have strong and fit... use public opinions for the presentation that support this discussion  
Reason 3: You have to compare both opinions in the first sentence. Second sentence, which side you support. Last 3 why you support it and give examples to illustrate.  
  
It is because of this specific reasoning reason, in relation to the C&C scoring section, that you need to use the 5 paragraph format essay presentation. It is not only analytical, it also has to be comparative in presentation at first. You cannot present your opinion in the opening paraphrase simply because of this requirement. You should save the presentation of your opinion until after you have shown a consideration of both points of view.  
  
Your word count is acceptable at 296 words. However, you still have spelling, grammar, and conciseness issues that were left unchecked and uncorrected. Get used to double checking, correcting, and perfecting your work during the practice essays. Failure to spot and correct your errors during the actual test could result in a forced failing score for you. It is forced because you could have avoided the errors and score downs if you had just edited your content before submission.
## The proportion of undergraduates, postgraduates, and other students spending time in the library

  
  
The three pie charts illustrate how much time spent in a British university library of three kinds of students: undergraduates, postgraduates, and other students.  
Overall, it is clear that the overwhelming majority of undergraduates and all students used library at least 7 hours, whereas the vast majority of postgraduates consumed over 15 hours at the library.  
  
To be specific, the pattern for postgraduate students was substantially different. 51 percent of postgraduates spent fifteen hours or more in the library. This number is even higher than that of undergraduates and the entire student body combined. Furthermore, only 17 percent of post-graduation student spent less than 7 hours while the students who move towards graduation in this category is a hefty 63 percent.  
  
Meanwhile, a relevant pattern was seen on range of eight to fourteen hours which postgraduates and the average students spent, capturing just 32 percent and 35 percent of the total. In addition, the proportion of postgraduate students who spent fifteen hours per week or more in the library was very close to all students who spent only 1-7 hours.  
  
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In the summary overview, you should have indicated 2 things:  
1. The measurement was done in percentages.  
2. The same measurements were converted to the number of hours the students spent in the library.  
  
It is important for you to properly analyze the provided information so that you can show a proper range of analytical skills in relation to your TA score. In this essay, you could have done this in the summary overview, prior to the full discussion report that you did in the body of paragraphs. It is because of the lack of analysis in the summary overview and your last paragraph that you did not meet the 3 sentence minimum requirement for each paragraph.
## Banana export and it's cost

  
  
Hello, it's my first using this amazing website.Can you please read my essay and comment? Thank you so much.  
  
The charts below show the banana export in 1993 and 2003, and a breakdown of the cost to the consumer of each banana in 2003.  
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.  
  
The given bar chart compares the changes of the amount of bananas were exported from three regions within a 10-year period, meanwhile the pie chart demonstrates the proportion of how much each procedures cost from the total price of one banana in 2003.  
  
It is clear that Latin America made the most remarkable enhancement in banana export,in comparison the improvement of banana export made by Africa and Far East was less significant. Also the cost on distribution and retail was the highest among others.  
  
In the bar chart, Latin America had the highest number of banana export in 1993,at around 4.5 million, followed by a sharp increase, as a result there were over 10 million metric tonnes of bananas exported. Africa was the region with least amount of banana exported in 1993,at approximately 0.5 million,its number jumped to 1 million in 10 years.There were little increase in Far East's banana export,the figures were under 2 million throughout the period.  
  
In the pie chart,distribution and retail account for one thirds of overall cost, at 35%, while the export cost was the lowest,only 4%. In addition, the percentage of the source of the banana was surprisingly the second lowest,at merely 5%. International transport, import licenses and taxes summed up for almost two fifths of entire cost. Finally,18% of the money was left as profit.  
  
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The main problem of your essay is not the content. You did well in the reporting aspect. The problem is in the way that you worded your report. There is a 20 minute time limit on this essay test. Which means, the word count should not be more than 150 - 190 words. In sentence form that would be between 12-15 sentences per paragraph, following the more appropriate 3 paragraph format.  
  
For your summary overview, you need to complete the related information per image prior to your 2 trending statements, one for each image. So you need to consolidate your information summary to include measurement types for both, and the breakdown of the listing as indicated by the graphs. Only after that information is presented should you indicate the trending statement for each image. For this essay, you should focus on the cohesiveness and coherence of your presentation. That is achieved by using just the right number of words per paragraph to describe the information. Be straight in your reporting, You do not need to be too wordy as you would in a task 2 essay. Look for comparison points, report on those. Otherwise, just deliver a combined report for each image so that you do not go overboard with your word count, which will make you miss the deadline for the completion of this essay.
Hi guys. Please leave your comment on my essay.  
  
## number of students who entered the North Dean University

  
  
Topic: The graph illustrates the number of Chinese, Japanese and Indian students who enrolled at North Dean University over a five-year period. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.  
  
The graph shows information about how many students of three different countries enter North Dean University from 1996 to 2003.  
  
Overall, it can be seen from the graph that there was a considerable upward trend in the number of students of both China and India, while the amount of Japanese students experienced a sharp fall over the period in question.  
  
Regarding the Japanese enrolments, the number started at over 100 students in 1999, then there was a dramatical decline over the next two years. Having remained stable at approximately 40 students during a next year, the figure then decreased swiftly to around 30 in 2003.  
  
By contrast, the number of Chinese students, who opt North Dean University went in the opposite direction. This figure rose gradually between 1999 and 2000 then rocketed significantly and reached almost 100 students in 2003. Similarly, there was a gradual increase in number of Indian students, finishing at around 80 students in 2003.  
  
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158 words helps you meet the minimum word count, but it doesn't help you increase your scoring potential. The aim is to highlight your analytical and writing skills in this report essay. So the magic number should be anywhere from 175-190 words. By writing that many words, you will be able to truly highlight your writing skills based on all 4 scoring considerations.  
  
You should complete your summary overview. Always pattern it after the given information in the original discussion instruction. It will be best if you restate the topic based on the original presentation, then add the other information from the chart in relation to data presentation. The data to be added are:  
  
- Name of the countries  
- Years involved in the measurement  
- measurement count (percentage, thousands, etc.)  
  
From there, you will have properly outlined the discussion to meet the 3-5 sentence format. Your overall presentation is composed of run-on rather than simple and complex sentences. You need to cut down your sentence to a proper mix of the aforementioned sentence types. That means you will also be spreading out your information within the 3-5 sentence format, which is a requirement for all 3 paragraph presentations.
## IELTS TASK2: A THROW-AWAY SOCIETY

  
  
***Many people say that we have developed into a " throw-away" society because we are filling up our environment with so many plastic bags and rubbish that we cannot fully dispose of? To want degree do you agree with this opinion?***  
  
It is true that our environment is full of waste produced from human activities that we cannot recycle or reuse in the future. I personally agree with this statement and this following essay will explain it in detail.  
  
Firstly, over-consumption is attributed as one of the primary factor in our model society. Nowadays, citizens arre encouraged to buy a new product because it is cheaper to use and throw things away rather than reuse them. For example, electronic devices like televisions, radios, CD and DVD players, even laptops - all are occasionally thrown out since the cost that you have to pay to repair is almost two times as high as the new one.  
  
Secondly, another factor that has added the fuel to the fire is the increase of packing companies which produce single-use products wrapped in non-environmentally friendly materials such as plastic, nylon. Indeed, dwellers are recommended to buy the new products religiously, especially the disposable ones. Because the government believe that this behavior could stimulate economy by increasing the GDP of its own country.  
  
In conclusion, based on the above mentioned facts the throw-away society becomes among the prime element that has destroyed our environment.
Never make claims about the truth of a statement in an extent essay. That is because there are people who will disagree with your opinion, that creates a false statement not implied in the original discussion. Always state the opposing opinion in your paraphrase along with the response to the question. By the way, your response lacks an extent representation or emotional response. The strength could be strongly, urgently, unquestionably, etc. There needs to be a descriptive response to the extent.  
  
Avoid using connecting words like "because" to start a sentence. That word is used to connect ideas, phrases, and other thoughts in the sentence representation.  
  
Your paragraphs lack clarity due to your failure to use a proper mix of simple and complex sentences. Make sure you use 3-5 sentences of various lengths per paragraph so you can meet that specific GRA requirement.
## IELTS Writing Task 2 - Topic animals

  
  
**A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research.  
  
Discuss both view and give your opinion.**  
  
It is believed that humans should not employ animals it is morally wrong to cause animals to suffer, while others are in favor of exploiting them due to their benefits of humanity. This essay will discuss both points of view before coming to a reasoned conclusion.  
  
On the one hand, there are several reasons why protecting animals from killing them for daily products is a considerable choice. First, many scientific shreds of evidence show that consuming an excessive amount of meat on a regular and long-term basis may cause health problems, including cancer and heart disease. Instead, vegetarian diets that are proved to provide the same amount of nutrients for consumers are becoming the best selection. Moreover, thousands of wild animals like tigers and rhinos are killed each year; their fur, bones, and horns are taken for medicine and the fashion industry. However, there is no endorsement that these products are available for curing diseases. Therefore, it is such an inhuman action that should be restricted by the government.  
  
Despite the above arguments, I believe that animals' products are vital for human life that could not be altered immediately. Food products from animals are necessary for the human to meet the demand of nutrition which in vegetarian foods do not contain. Besides, some people who are into meat need this type of protein to be satisfied and enjoy their lives in some ways. Another reason is that medical experiments on people are considered to be so risky that we need animals like white mice to use as substitutes. As a result, these animals desire their lives for science instead of having meaningless ones and humans could limit the damages in many lab experiments.  
  
In conclusion, the use of animals to provide food, medicine, and clothing is essential to satisfy our various needs. However, consumption must be strictly controlled and used for advantageous purposes.
Your prompt paraphrase is confusing as the details from the original prompt have not been separated in your presentation. Use 3 sentences to separate the information then 2 sentences in the same paragrapg to opine the discussion points.  
  
You have also misrepresented the discussion instructions. You are not being asked to present a conclusion regarding the given topic. Instead, you are directed to offer a personal opinion. An opinion is only a point of view or your thoughts about the topic. A conclusion is a determined ending to a problem or discussion. There lies the difference and there exists your prompt deviation that could very well cause this essay to fail. Your Task accuracy will fall under a response not related to the prompt.  
  
Your overall essay discussion does not follow the pattern expected for the discussion.This requires a 3 reasoning paragraph wherein you individually explain each point of view and then, after considering the comparison of the two sides, you come to an I nformed opinion. Your presentation appears to be an incomplete discussion and will be scored as such.  
  
The improper discussion format and incorrect restatement presentation are the biggest problems of your essay. So you cannot expect a good score for this type of work.
## Households owning and renting accommodation in two countries

  
  
The graph below includes the proportion of households owned and rented in two countries from 1918 to 2011.  
  
The households owned are in a trend of rising while the households in rented are in a falling trend. Their peak and lowest point are in the opposite position.  
  
In 1918, the households owned is about 20% and the households in rented are about 80% respectively. But in 1971, both of them increase and decrease in a similar percentage, lead to an equal level of 50%. In 2011, they kept their trend as a result of 65% and 35%.  
  
Regarding the peak and the lowest point, in terms of owned, its peak is in 2001 which is about 70% while its lowest point is in 1918 which is slightly above 20%. On the other hand, households in rented reached its peak in 1918 with 78% and facing its lowest point in 2001 with slightly over 30%.  
  
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You are really shortchanging yourself by writing only 154 words. The best bet you have for scoring better with the Task 1 essay is to write between 175-190 words. That means, you should write about 3 sentences per paragraph, avoiding run on sentences in the process. You did not properly identify the image. It is not a graph. It is a bar graph. You should be specific about the image type because there are several versions of every image provided. By using the specific image name, you will show that you have properly prepared yourself for the test.  
  
What is the measurement value being used? Your summary information could be more complete. Adding it to the first paragraph would have been more appropriate in terms of completing the summary presentation requirement. All of your paragraphs are under developed. You need to add more analysis to your paragraphs. You are not really analyzing the information. You are just presenting the information, without a true explanation or analysis of the data.  
  
The best way to approach the essay would have been to separate the comparative discussions. Paragraph 2 for one sector, paragraph 3 for the other sector. That would have helped you to present a clearer comparison information for data specific to each section.You do not need to try and present both sectors in the same paragraph. That makes the discussion confusing for the reader.