dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
***Some people feel that boarding schools are an excellent option for children, while others disagree for a number of reasons.***  
## Consider both sides and reach a conclusion

  
  
Nowadays, as education has become an essential part of bringing up a child, many people prefer their children to attend boarding school for some good reasons. However, others tend to be against the idea since they believe that school is not the only educational source to raise a child. We will go into these both views in this essay.  
  
Firstly, school provides children with the most academic environment in which they can consume as much knowledge as they want. So, boarding schools should be considered to be a good option for parents who want their child to be a good student. Secondly, boarding schools can bring a big assistance to parents who are at work virtually all day. It is quite easy to understand that they have to spend their day at work and leave their child at home under no observation is very dangerous. Last but not least, being at school all day can help children to be more sociable and dependent. These advantages are important to build up not solely the child's knowledge but also his personality.  
  
By contrast, opposite point of view points out that frequently staying away from parents can terribly affect family life. This happens when the child is so dependent that they can take care of themselves and take away the chance for their parent to care for them. In long-term, family members will become less closed leading to ignorance between family members. Another issue is that if the child got bullied at school and be unable to express themselves to their parents, they might suffer from depression and grow up being a person with mental problems. Moreover, a part from academic knowledge, other aspects around the child are also important and can only being taught carefully, which can only be provided by the parents.  
  
Overall, it seems advisable that letting children at school all day can benefit them. However, terrible consequences of the idea should be taken into account as well. Since parents cannot observe and protect their child at school, it is necessary to be around them more often to ensure that they are open to parents and willing to ask for help.  
  
361 words
A Task 2 test will never ask you to reach a conclusion. You misinterpreted the discussion instruction which is "Discuss both points of view and give your personal opinion." An opinion is different from a conclusion. By definition:  
  
Conclusion - the last main division of a discourse, usually containing a summing up of the points and a statement of opinion or decisions reached.  
  
Opinion - a personal view, attitude, or appraisal.  
  
The latter is what the task 2 essay always asks the writer to deliver as a part of the point of view analysis. You were to explain the public opinion based on publicly known reasons or opinions for the first part of the presentation. Then you present your personal opinion after you consider the public point of view. You can either present a single opinion based on a side you support or an opinion of each public point of view that considers the discussion in comparison to your opinion of the public perception.  
  
Your restatement is insufficient. You did not include the reference requirement to your personal point of view in the discussion aspect. By the way, you are discussing the opinions solely from a personal point of view rather than the :  
  
Public opinion + explanation + personal opinion+ explanation  
  
format. You have not delivered a clear explanation that separates the public from the personal through the use of appropriate genderless pronouns. The essay is also too long for an opinion discussion. You should have been able to do this within 290 words. Your explanations need more work if we are to consider the proper and expected discussion format.
Just some confusions and suggestions:  
Make sure it's "dependent" or "independent" that you want to use in the second and third paragraph.  
  
The fourth sentence in the third paragraph: Another issue...the child...and be unable to....  
-I think you need to use "is" as the verb (since the subject is child) instead of "be"  
  
Not sure why using "being" in the last sentence of the third paragraph, I suggest you simply use be.  
  
The last sentence in the final paragraph is also confusing: Since parents...their child...be around them...ensure that they....  
- since you use them and they, the subject should be children. Otherwise, it would be confused if "they" refers to parents.
## Some people believe that **competitive sport, both team and individual, have no place in the school curriculum**

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***How far do you agree or disagree?***  
  
Physical education is very essential in the school curriculum. Sometimes competition sports teams and individuals also consider adding to program education. I think students should be getting used to competitive sport.  
  
To begin with, competition among students will have chances to try to be more successful than their friends. Moreover, they can show up the ability and boost self - confident. For example, students take part in the football club, they will spend on time practicing with a partner to repair for competition, where the student will show up and define themself with everyone.  
  
Secondly, competition sports help the student do their best to win in a few work likely they are playing competitive sport. The teenager will make a special effort not to lose their friends. For example, in the examination, students do not want to lower points than their classmates, so they will effort and compete like play competitive sports if they do not want to be defeat.  
  
On the other hand, the student plays competitive sport have a few harms for them namely injured or having a conflict among student. Competition sports always come with eager to win, so they will use every trick to take out the opponent. As a result, sports competitively always hidden dangers. So that, when participants a sports the players should be careful.  
  
In a nutshell, competitive sports in the school curriculum create opportunities for students to try their best and effort with their goals. Besides, they can confidence with their ability and get used to the competitive workplace in the future
When you write an extent essay, you need to first think of whether you agree with the topic. Once you figure out which opinion you support, think of the reasons why you support that opinion. Then pick the strongest opinion that you have and use that for the extent response. The format should be:  
  
I agree/ disagree with this opinion to the degree that  
I agree / disagree with this idea to the degree that this discussion...  
  
Always give the topics that you will be using to support your opinion in the outline of the response. Make sure that you use strong convincing words in your presentation. That means I think, perhaps, maybe, or any words of uncertainty cannot be used in the presentation. Neither should you use a comparison discussion for the 4 paragraph essay. You must focus only on the convincing support or defense of your opinion in the 2 reasoning presentation paragraphs.
***A serious problem affecting countries right across the globe is the lack of water for drinking, washing and other household uses.***  
## Why do many countries face water shortages, and what could be done to alleviate the problem?

  
  
For decades, water has always been an unreplaceable part of human daily life. As a consequence, the world now facing a huge problem relating to the lack of water for drinking and its alternative usages. Therefore, in this essay, I'll draw some sort of its causes and how we can fix it.  
  
The biggest concrete evidence that directly leads to water shortages is over-using water. For instance, people in countries with sufficient source of clear water are tend not to worry about the reduction of water, instead they use it inappropriately and freely leading to the increase of the amount of used water. A solution for the governments to restrict the number of water that each home may use monthly and fine them if the number is exceeded. This will probably increase people awareness in using water.  
  
Another cause that I believe occurs at least once in every home that is dripping faucet. For example, based on the research I did lately, a dripping faucet unless we fix it on time, a vast number of water wasted. To tackle this problem, not only governments but also local authorities should take role to propagandize people to check carefully after they use water to see if it's closed properly or not.  
  
Finally, the amount of water on earth is large, in other word, infinite, but the number of drinkable source is limited and sharply reduces each year. Clearly, four-firth of the surface of the earth is covered in water, specifically sea, but the water that we consume or wash our clothes is not the sea, it usually comes from down deep the earth or the rivers, fountain, etc. So that, governments have to find an alternative source of fresh water or encourage scientists to transform seawater into the usable one.  
  
In conclusion, water's shortage should be concerned by all of us or else it will be a disaster. In my opinion, we should pay more attention to not only when we are using water but also other kind of things that sustain us.
@QuocHuu  
make your tense clear like in 2nd line u are not using is/am/are it would be is facing, it should be the world is now facing a huge problem of insufficiency of water especially in form of drinking water and other categories.Thus, this essay will elaborates the causative factors of water scarcity and also the different ways to mitigate this problem.  
  
the difference between yours and mine is only the your once is quite simple and with very long sentences use concise words that explain the main purpose of topic as i explained above.  
  
2nd paragraph over using water changed with its over usage or wastage For example, the counties where good water resources are present, instead of saving water for future, wasting this resource on an individual basis.  
  
For the water number would not be used its amount  
Thus it is required that government must take some legal action and regulate a law to monitor the water wastage in every home or industry so that people will be aware of the consequences in form of bill or fine.  
  
dripping faucet  
its not about what you think and convert it in english word by word please make some sense of the sentence  
the latest research i did on water shortage make me believe that leaky faucet is the most prominent contributor in wasting water if t did not turn off properly.  
  
What authority will tell about turning off faucet u can say, that not only a public service message on governmental level but also an individual, must be responsive to that issue.  
  
I think i have did much work on your grammer its too weak try to make sentence by finding new words before adding in text and if cannot then u can google it.
In the cause and solution essay, you have to remember 2 things:  
1. Never include information not found in the original prompt. Reference to this in your essay is the first sentence in the paraphrased presentation.  
2. Always outline the topic for discussion. In this case present 2 related causes that can be discussed in 1 paragraph and 2 solutions related to the 2 problems, also discussed in one paragraph (reasoning paragraphs).  
  
You have to outline your discussion points in the last 2 or 3 sentences of the paraphrase section because the examiner will want to see the extent of your understanding of the given topic. This will be considered alongside the relevance of your reasoning topics. All of which will add up to the highest possible TA score for your presentation.  
  
Based on the discussion instructions, you will know if you will be writing a 4 or 5 paragraph essay. Based on the given discussion, this is only a 4 paragraph discussion. The 5 paragraph essay is only for public opinion comparisons with a personal opinion presentation. You have to try and develop your topic combination discussions in single paragraphs. Use connecting sentences to accomplish that.  
  
The conclusion should not contain your personal opinion. It should always reflect the following:  
- Restatement of the prompt  
- Causes summary (topic sentences only)  
- Solutions (topic sentences only)  
- Closing sentence
Please help me to make my essay better and free of mistakes. Thank you a lot for your support.  
  
## international conferences hosted by three cities

  
  
The line chart compares the number of international conferences hosted by three cities A, B, and C between 1980 and 2010. Overall, the quantity of international conferences in City A and B decreased while the number of City C, from the least in 1980, rocketed and ended up being the highest among all in 2010.  
  
City A and City B experienced similar trends during the whole period of 30 years, with the former obtaining higher data most of the time. In 1980, the number of international conferences in cities A was 35, compared with 30 in city B. Both cities then witnessed narrowing fluctuations in the figures before holding the same number of 27 meetings in 2005. However, by 2010, meetings taking place in city B surpassed the number of city A, with 26 and 24 international conferences respectively.  
  
In contrast, commencing at 0 in 1980, the quantity of global conferences that City C held surged to 20 after only 10 years and grew to 35 in 2000. Thenceforth, there was a slight decrease in the meeting number to 31 in 2010, yet city C still attained the first rank among the three cities.  
  
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Your opening sentence is not paraphrased enough for the examiner to believe that you did not do a simple cut and paste of the original information. It still uses too much of the original words from the original instruction. You should not use any part of the prompt presentation in your restatement. By the way, in your restatement, you claimed mere cities when the paraphrase should have included the word "major" to take the place of the word "capital" to describe the cities positioning. The information should also follow the 3-5 sentence format for the paragraph. Simply combining your trending statement with the summary overview would have helped you overcome that sentence requirement problem.  
  
The green line shows that it had crossed into the other 2 lines in 1995. There is no analytical reference to this part in your presentation. You have to explain that the numbers were equal for these cities during that period, providing an estimate of the possible equal numbers during the presentation. Such a discussion will help increase your score based on the "comparisons where relevant" part of the instructions for the report.
Please help me to correct my essay and give me some feeback about the strucure of my words. I'll be grateful for your support.  
  
## numbers of people using Internet from 1999 to 2009

  
  
The line graph compares three different countries, including American, Canada and Mexico, in terms of the proportion of people using the Internet from 1999 to 2009.  
   
It is clear that there was a gradually increasing trend in percentages of Internet users among these countries. Besides, Internet usage rates of the population in the USA and Canada were much higher than that in Mexico over a period of 10 years  
  
In 1999, nearly 20% of people in America had access to the Internet, compared to about 10% and 5% in Canada and Mexico respectively. The figures demonstrated much sharper rises in the USA and Canada than that for Mexico. By 2005, the Internet usage in Canada formally overtook the figure for America, at about 70%.  
  
It was not until 2009 that the percentage of people who used Internet surprisingly reached nearly 100% in Canada, the largest point in comparison with the three countries throughout these 10 years. The figure was about 80% in the USA. By contrast, the proportion of people surfing the Internet was only close to 30%.  
  
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Using the 4 paragraph presentation is not helpful when you do not have enough information to complete a 4 paragraph data analysis presentation. Your summary overview should include the trending statement to help you get the best possible TA score. The TA score is based on the clarity of your summary and a proper presentation of the highs and lows information in the essay. It should be complete enough to inform the reader, even if the reader does not complete reading the whole report presentation.  
  
While a simple mistake such as using the word American in place of USA will probably not seriously affect your overall score, it might make the examiner think twice about your LR abilities. After all, the graph says USA, which could also be called America, but American, refers to the person from America, not the country as indicated in the line graph description.  
  
For a more balanced presentation and, to allow you the opportunity to present your actual GRA skills, balance the paragraph sentence presentations. Use the 3-5 sentence presentation consistently so that you can better develop your simple and complex sentence presentations. Most of your sentences are just run-on sentence. If you use individual sentences for the report and allow yourself to use more punctuation marks within the simple and complex sentence presentations, you should score far better than if you just kept using a comma in every sentence presentation.
Please feel free to comment your opinions and help me improve my score!  
Thanks a lot.  
  
## **The pie charts below show the percentage of housing owned and rented in the UK in 1991 and 2007.**

  
*Summarize the information by describing the main features of the charts and making comparisons where appropriate.*  
  
The two pie charts given illustrates the comparison of the percentage of housing owned and rented in the UK between 2007 and 1991.  
In general, in both of the years, the home owner took the main part from the total number in 1991 and 2007: 22 million and 27 million homes respectively. Moreover, other types such as social renting, private renting, and social housing were also reported significantly.  
  
In 1991, the home owner just accounted for over a half but then the number increased to nearly 75% in 2007. Actually, this type was the most popular over the period. Nevertheless, social housing had the smallest usage with about 15%. In 2007, the number even had a downtrend to one-third.  
  
Besides, private renting and social renting kept a stable speed in declination and expansion. In 1991, the percentage of social renting was a quarter, however, had a dramatic fall to nearly 20% over the period. In contrast, the number of private renting slightly increased while it started at under 20% and then to 25% in 2007.  
  
*
Your report tends to lose its academic tone when you use the words actually, nevertheless, and besides. Avoid the use of these and other similar word fillers. Always be straight to the point. State the facts as you see it. There is no need to use words to excuse what you need to say. Just say it. You should keep the academic and assured tone throughout your essay. Know when to use the preceding words and when not to. In this case, you should not use those at all in the presentation. Those words remove the focus of the reader from the information you are presenting. So keep it straightforward. Just the facts please, no unnecessary word usage.  
  
Save for that simple observation of your work and some conciseness issues, I have to say that this is one of the better presented task 1 essays in this forum. You have the potential to score highly in this section of essay writing. Your thoughts are clear and easy to follow. The data presentation is easily understood. Keep up the good work and I look forward to reviewing your next essay.
***Prompt:  
Advertising is all around us; it is an unavoidable part of everyone's life.  
## Some people say that advertising is a positive part of our lives.

  
To what extent do you agree or disagree?***  
  
It is true that many types of advertising, such as online advertising and tele-advertising, become significantly popular and affect to almost every people's lives. While several people assume that there are positive parts of advertising related to everyone's life, I do believe that the effect of advertising is seldom the case.  
  
There are several reasons that advertising activities could bring benefits to our lives. Firstly, people do advertisements under forms of commercial or online usually put in an array of details that entertains potential customers. Secondly, advertisements provide numerous features of new products, therefore, customers can easily approach to the products that suit their pocket. For example, I remembered that I decided to buy detergent from OMO brand for trials after one time I have watched their commercial advert due to the useful features of new products and the reasonable price. Finally, people are wary of buying things after watching many types of similar advertisements, thus, they could save their budget for more important tasks.  
  
In my opinion, I do believe that authorities should consider managing advertising activities due to their negatives to people's lives. Many types of advertisements are brought to customer intensively, such as pop-ups when people are online, and therefore it is very intrusive to people privacy. Moreover, people can be easily swayed by advertising, especially with type of celebrity endorsement. For example, when you have idols advertising for a brand, you usually do not consider the quality of the product and buy goods impulsively. Also, the frequency of advertisements is crowded on both commercial, online and telephone source, people may get bewildering in choosing products.  
  
In conclusion, while it is true that advertising are tolerated to be an essential parts of our lives, I believe that there are still several negative impact of advertising on people's lives, in term of stress and the false fulfillment.  
  
~~~I have just started studying IELTS Writing task 2 for several weeks. Therefore, please help me on writing. Thank you !!!~~~
You should make sure that your first paragraph accurately represents the requirement for the presentation. In this case, this is a paraphrase + extent response. The extent response asks you to take 2 topics for discussion in the reasoning paragraph that can help illustrate the strength of your opinion. The paragraph should clearly indicate a measured response that allows you to outline the topics for discussion. You could have said:  
  
*Product placements are unavoidable in our daily lives. While consumer promotions have been referred to by others as an affirmative influence in their day to day existence, I would have to say that I greatly disagree with this argument based on 2 reasons. The first marked reason I have is that... While the second heavy consideration I have is that...*  
  
Using that line of reasoning, you will be able to show the strength of your conviction, along with the outline for the discussion, that will also fully support your emotional opinion regarding the discussion topic. Keep the discussion on track. Do not compare A and B, focus on discussing only A or, only B depending upon the side that you choose to support in the discussion. This is not a comparison essay but rather, a single point of view explanation that will rely on emotional, descriptive words to enhance your response.