dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
Hi Dioba,  
  
... was a dream and it has been dream ~~is still the~~ since 1939. But, recently ~~years~~ , dream ~~took~~take a step forward when ...  
California~~'s~~ consider~~ing~~a similar legislation. In the speaker ~~lab~~laboratory at Stanford, he has been ...  
He develop~~ing~~S robotic race cars, and ~~develop their~~its performances to the limit ...  
~~Almost majority~~Most of ~~the~~ people know that human ...  
And the last is he want the robotic race ...  
The last , he compared ~~with~~to data that he was recorded from ...  
  
Hopefully it helps.
Question:  
  
***The free movement of goods across national borders has long been a controversial issue. Some people argue that it is necessary for economic growth, while others claim that it damages local industries. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. You should write at least 250 words.***  
  
Answers:  
  
A free trade system which cross the national boundary was being long-life controversy in myriad side of array of countries. People was divided into two major of thinking which have pro argument and contra about that system. My standpoint seeing this system as major half-truths in modern economic system, there are two kind of impact, the first one is looking advantages and the second one rise the drawbacks in the world's face.  
  
In the trust with this system we could obtain many advantages. Firstly, we can increase our economic index rapidly and growing our market to more competitive than before. For example, our market and stock exchange could have bargaining position in another countries' eyes. Secondly, our country can export many things are endemic so readily. It could increase our domestic economy index. In the simple example that we could export an endemic fragrant woods namely Kayu Cendana so easily to Europe or other hemisphere in this world without the lot of bureaucracy.  
  
On other side, myriad people think this system could be more dangerous than usual. They think that system has array of drawbacks. For the was happening is the lot of countries was relying on to another and it cannot rise their economic independently. Due to those countries too dependent with supplies from another. If these supplies will run out, those countries cannot do any things. In alternative way, if we argue to insert free trade system cross our sovereignty border we can tackle any problems with myriad problem solving. We could create a great deal of regulation in our parliament which still shield our sovereignty of nation.  
  
Ultimately, free trade system is major half-truths of today's world economic system. This system made people divided into two side argue this argument, who pro and who contra with this agenda. in my opinion, this system is like a penny with two different side-advantages and disadvantage-depend on the way of view we could see it.
hai alfa  
I have several suggestions for you  
I hope it helps  
  
**avoid to use subject pronoun such as (they, them, we, us)**  
  
... long-life controversy in myriad ~~side of~~ array of countries.  
  
My standpoint is seeing this system as major ...  
  
They think that system has array of drawbacks.  
  
~~Due to~~This is because those countries too dependent ... ***(due to + "noun")***  
  
... we can tackle any problems with ~~myriad~~many problem solving.  
... of regulation in our parliament whichis still shield our sovereignty of nation.  
  
thanks
People who have relations with politic are often considered to be in the notorious image. Following that, four hundred years maturing democracy with the development of the society still faces a disappointed sense.  
  
An array of intelligent people has explained that democracy will lead society into a great life because freedom will bring peace, prosperity and security. However, the bulk of nations which have applied this system in their countries are still in the dismal conditions.  
  
Why those situations still emerge under the democracy is not about the prominent leaders who commonly have already achieved incredible background in education that citizens have elected but the problem is why citizens choose them.  
  
The point about democracy is not instrumental. Democracy coming up is not due to the benefits that it brings and a guarantee of peace for the neighbourhood but democracy matters because it reflects the idea of liberty and dignity of individual that have equal vote in the formation of the government  
  
If democracy becomes vigorous again, it will be necessary that no longer condition leads the public to attempt to trust the politician but it leads the politician to
Hello  
You have a good summary  
I have some corrections  
  
... often considered to be *~~in the notorious image~~***role model**.  
... have applied this system**.**~~in~~**Their** countries are still in the ~~dismal conditions~~ horrible conditions.  
... emerge under the democracy**?****this**is not about the prominent (...) incredible background**also** in education (...) elected**.**~~but~~**Finally,** the problem is why ...  
The point about democracy is ~~not instrumental~~ not easy to do.  
... due to the benefits that ~~it~~*brings*and a guarantee of peace for the neighbourhood ~~but democracy matters~~ because it reflects ~~the~~**an** idea of liberty and dignity (...) the government**.**  
  
If democracy becomes ~~vigorous~~ strong again, it will be *necessary*that no longer (...) to attempt ~~to~~ for trust**ing** the politician but it leads the politician to ~~learn to trust~~ make attention for public.  
  
You can explain more about *brings* , in the third paragraph.
**IELTS Summary Task Biggest radio telescope on Earth ready to receive alien signals**  
  
A Five-hundred-meter Aperture Spherical Telescope called FAST was began spying on outer space since 25 September. FAST become the largest radio telescope in the world in which 200 meters bigger than its closest rival, the Arecibo Observatory in Puerto Rico was built in the 1960. The major functions of FAST are measure radio waves in space, allowing scientists study the rotation of galaxies, keep an eye on the behavior of pulsars and signals sent from aliens. Located in mountainous area of Guizhou Province in south-western China, make it was protected from radio-wave interference such as signals sent by cell phones and Wi-Fi. Furthermore, FAST will able to see dimmer objects better than Arecibo telescope can detect. Because of the size of FAST is very large, it means FAST collects more light. The advantage of FAST is FAST makes a faint signal more clearly. On the contrary, FAST was difficult moved his dish for observe different region of space. To anticipate that problem, FAST mirrored panels and its receiver are designed to move in conjunction, allowing experts observed at whatever part of the space.
HiDioba  
Let me give you some advice  
  
... in which 200 meters bigger than ~~its~~(it is) closest rival, the (...) was built in ~~the~~ 1960.  
.., keep an eye on the ~~behavior~~(behaviour) of pulsars and signals ...  
Located in (the) mountainous area of Guizhou ...  
Because ~~of~~ the size of FAST is very ...  
... moved his dish for ~~observe~~(observing) different region of space.  
... panels and its receiver ~~are~~(is) designed to move in conjunction, ...  
  
Thank you..
**TED Summary: The jobs we'll lose to machines and the ones we won't by Anthony Goldbloom**  
  
According to Anthony Goldbloom, in the next decades, most of proffessions such as lawyer and doctor will see a significant change as as result of machinery. In line to that, recently, researchers from Oxford University argues that nearly half of human's jobs are n the risk being take over by machine in the future.  
  
Anthony describes machine learning as a most influential branch of man-made intelligence, it enables to learn from data and imitate some of people's abilities. Machine learning first used in early 1990 with fairly simple jobs , for example, to evaluate credit loan's risk and to sort mails using postcode. Over the past few years, machine learning was capable to handle a more complicated task such to give score on high school essays and to determine eye disease called retinopathy. At this point, it is clear that there is no opportunity for human to compete against machine when it comes to do a large number of tasks.  
  
However, machine has limitation that they can only perform work than they had learned before in a large number, while people are able to cope with unfamiliar conditions. Business strategies, marketing campaigns and other creativities tasks are some of the people's capability that is likely hard to compete by machine.
Hi kiev, this is some advice for you. Perhaps useful for you.  
  
1.wrong spelling word  
~~proffessions~~ ---->profesions  
~~as~~ as result of machinery.----> redudancy  
half of human's jobs are in the risk being take over ...  
2.... machine learning as ~~a~~the most influential branch ...  
3.... 1990 with fairly simple jobs , ---->better use dot for end this sentence  
4.... to handle a more complicated task such as to give score
The first blind climber ever was Erik Weihenmayer in El Capitan in a day On 26th September 2016. Elite team of climbers and mountaineers accompanied him, including Hans Florine, who had a record 177 times to climb El capitan. The team chose the route of East Buttres, the shortest one to el cap with 11 pitches and 1,500 vertical feet.  
  
He was not worry about the duration. He and team set a blistering speed and passed another climbers on the road and reached the top in a short time at 3 Pm. It was around eight hours after they started. Weihenmayer had trained and enhanced his technique to chose the suitable approached and learned on Aconcagua that someone walked over though snowy.  
  
He mittigated the potential damage for himself by walking in single way between two teammates who guided him in front of him. He kept one hand on that bags' friend. It was really struggle for him, so he never come up with this idea.
The first blind climber ever was Erik Weihenmayer ~~in~~ WHO CLIMBED El Capitan i......  
  
*On September 26, 2016, Erik Weihenmayer became ..t.*  
  
**THIS IS FROM THE ARTICLE** WHILE YOUR WRITING IS:  
  
The first blind...  
**TOO SIMILAR. again, what you did is not paraphrasing.**  
  
Indeed, there are many important and interesting facts you should deliver here only if you already understand the article.
Hi there,  
Here's is some of feedback from me.  
  
~~The first blind climber ever was Erik Weihenmayer in El Capitan//~~ Erik... was the first blind man who ever climb El Capitan...  
including Hans Florine, who had a (OF) record 177 times ...  
  
He and team set a blistering speed and... ( is it refer to Hans or Erik?)  
  
Best of luck on your writing progress.  
  
Cheers.
**International Visitors to New Zealand : country of origin**  
  
The pie chart gives us information about where people who travel to New Zealand come from. According to that data, there are six countries of origin visitors who come to New Zealand. And also on that chart, there are seven parts of chart to differentiate each country.  
  
A closer look at that chart shows that Australia has the largest percentage for country of origin visitors on New Zealand, which is forty percent. The second place is come from United Kingdom on twelve percent. United States makes complete of top three usually visitors come from to New Zealand, on the nine percent.  
  
The East Asian countries, China, Japan and South Korea, send five percent, four percent and three percent each. However, twenty-seven percent come from other European countries. Overall, on the pie chart we know that more than seventy percent of holidaymakers come from Britannia areas.  
  
*
Hello Mem,  
  
writing task 1 require less 150 word and your task approximately 145 words only, you need add more word to fit the requirement.  
  
According to ~~that~~ the data,  
  
~~And also on that chart,~~ these pie chart shown there are ...  
  
that chart shows that double conjunction.  
  
... come from United Kingdom ~~on~~ around twelve percent.  
  
... visitors come from to New Zealand, ~~on~~ about the nine percent.  
  
in Writing task 1 at least includes introduction, body and conclusion. pay attention in grammar and tenses  
  
hope these help
hallo mem77  
there are few suggestion for you  
  
count of word should be at least 150 your word is 145  
The pie chart ~~gives~~~~us~~ shows information ~~about~~ where people who travel ...  
~~According to that~~ based on data ( be carefull with preposition and structure s+v+o)  
  
~~And also on that chart~~ the diagrams showed, there are seven parts of ~~chart to~~ differentiate each country.  
The second place is come from The United Kingdom ...  
United States make~~s~~ complete of top (...) from to New Zealand, ~~on the~~ until nine percent.  
  
... Japan and South Korea, send ~~five~~ 5 ~~percent~~ %, ~~four percent~~ 4% and ~~three percent~~ 3% each.  
  
(attention for structure gerund, preposisi and common word)
hi mem77  
  
... information about where ~~people who travel~~ tourist/traveller to New Zealand ~~come~~ comes from. According to ~~that~~ data, there are six countries ... ~~And also on that chart~~ then, there are seven parts of chart to ...  
  
A closer look at ~~that chart~~ it shows that Australia australian has the largest (...), which is ~~forty~~ fourty percent. The second ~~place~~ largest is ~~come from~~ United Kingdom on twelve percent. United States makes to complete of top three ...  
  
#i think the summary still need a beautiful sentence
Hello mem77, here i left comment for you  
  
 The pie chart gives ==>(you can change the word with describes, illustrates, intences, shows) us information about where ...  
  
 And also on ~~that~~ the chart, there are seven parts of (the) chart to differentiate each country.  
  
 A closer look at that (you can use: overall, it can be seen that,(the) chart shows that Australia has ...  
  
 The second place is come from United Kingdom on twelve percent(s) .  
  
 ... come from to New Zealand, on the nine percent(s) .  
  
 The East Asian countries, China, Japan and South Korea, send five percent(s) , four percent(s) and three percent(s) each.  
  
 However, twenty-seven percent(s) come from other European countries.  
  
 Overall ==> overall it can be seen (...) more than seventy percent(s) of holidaymakers come from Britannia areas.
Hi mem77. Here I left some comment for you. Hope it can help.  
  
The pie chart gives us information about ~~where~~ people who want travel to New Zealand ~~come from~~ . According to ~~that~~the data, there are six countries of origin visitors who come to New Zealand. ~~And also on that~~ Based on the data, ~~chart~~ there are seven ~~parts of chart to differentiate each country.~~countries as an International visitors.  
  
... the largest percentage for the country of origin visitors ...  
The second place ~~is come from United Kingdom~~(It appears you have attempted to use the intransitive verb come from United Kingdom in a passive voice construction)has come from the United Kingdom twelve percent. The United States makes complete ...  
  
..., Japan and South Korea, send ~~five~~ 5 %, ~~four~~ 4 % and ~~three~~ 3 % each. However, twenty-seven percent ..... the pie chart,==> (you have to put the comma) we know that more than ...  
  
**Keep writing!!**
Hi mem77,  
  
I have few notes for you.  
  
\*For fulfilling requirement of Writing Task 1, at least you must have 150 words. In this writing you just have 145 words.  
  
\*The pie chart gives us information about where people who travel to New Zealand come from .  
{it's little bit confusing, I suggest you to use - "The pie charts gives us information regarding origin of traveler that comes to New Zealand "  
  
\*According to ~~that~~ {you should use the , it cause you already explained what kind of data} data.....  
  
\*And also on ~~that~~ {you should use the , it cause you already explained what kind of data} chart, there are seven parts of chart {there is many repetition for this word, you can use it } to differentiate each country.
Hello mem77  
i have a twice of advice for you  
  
And also on ~~that~~ chart  
A closer look at ~~that~~ chart shows that Australia ...  
**....you donot need (that), because at and on are prepositional that have to *meet noun or noun prhase* directly**  
  
Australia ~~has~~ the largest percentage for country ...  
**...you should change has with had, because had used to past time**
Wind is free source and an alternative energy. This energy is more advantage than disadvantage. For intense, Malawian inventor, William Kamkwamba made a windmill machine to generate electric in his home. He invented of this equipment by reading a science book. Soon after reading, he made some experiment, then it changed the structure specially the windmill design and bought some material to assemble. Next, He tested this machine for tree times and then it was assembly by raw material such as plastic pipe, bamboo, propeller, cable, storage battery, etc. This machine is rotated by wind. As a result, it is able to generate electric which supplies to four lights and two radios. In age 19 years old, dropped out at the school, he spent many time in energy for better life in Malawi village. Next plan, he prepare to build hydro-power energy in Malawi.  
  
Source: TED
Hello  
  
Your text will sound much better if you apply the following adjustments to it:  
  
Wind is [...] *the alternative source of energy.*  
~~This energy~~ [...] *There are more advantages to this energy than disadvantages.*  
For ~~intense~~ [...] *instance* [...]  
generate [...] *electrical power.*..  
He invented [...] *this gadget in the aftermath of having read a science book.*  
he ~~made~~ [...] *conducted a few experiments, which has led him to consider altering the structure of a conventional windmill.*  
~~for~~~~tree~~ [...]*three*[...] times...  
~~then it was assembly~~ [...] this part of the sentence doesn't make much sense - one needs to assemble a machine prior to testing it.  
  
~~electric~~ [...] *enough electricity to run four...*  
~~In age~~ [...] *At the age of..*.  
Next ~~plan~~ [...] *he is planning to build a hydro-power plant..*.  
  
I hope this will help. Regards.
Scientists of University of South Australia made the electronic tongue from a platinum, a gold, and carbon electrodes to accurately determine the age of wines and their overall qualities. This electronic tongue can predict the tasted perception of sommeliers by identified the chemical composition and grape varieties. Therefore, these instruments can help sommeliers to taste 100 wines each day but it can not be used for judging in the wine competition. Mr. Smyth said that the electronic tongue was able to replicate the human sense of taste but no instrument was possible to replace the emotion, psyche, past memories and experiences that influenced these perceptions and contributed to our flavourless perception.
... electronic tongue from ~~a~~ platinum, ~~a~~ gold, and carbon electrodes ...  
This ~~electronic tongue~~ NEW INVENTION can predict the taste~~d~~ perception of sommeliers by ~~identified~~ IDENTIFYING the chemical composition ...  
Therefore, these instruments THIS INSTRUMENT can help ~~sommeliers~~ THEM to taste 100 wines each day ~~but~~ ALTHOUGH it can not be used for ...  
... the electronic tongue ~~was~~ IS able to replicate (...) but no instrument ~~was~~ IS possible to replace the emotion,..  
  
you need to lengthen your summary so that there will be many aspects or thing to be commented for enhancing your work.  
overall, on this summary, i found word form, repetitiion, pronouns using, and tenses as your issues. keep writing and keep learning.
**TED - Ken Robinson says schools kill creative**  
  
Nowadays, children are not prepared to be wrong. They always obay with the teacher's instructions, willingness and desires. However, If children are not prepared to be wrong, they will never come up with anything original. Picasso said that all children are born as artists, but in this current condition, by the time they get to be adults, most children have lost that creativity thinking. the issue which should be addressed is how to remain an artist as we grow up.  
  
Ken Robinson explains that there are two kinds of intelligence are:  
  
Firstly, it is drivers. We think about the world in all the ways that we experience it. We think visually, we think in sound, we think kinesthetic-ally. We think in abstract terms, we think in movement.  
  
Secondly, intelligence is dynamic. If you look at the interactions of a human brain, intelligence is wonderfully interactive. The brain is not divided into compartments. In fact, creativity which he defines as the process of having original ideas that have value. More often than not comes about through the interaction of different disciplinary ways of seeing things.  
  
Note: fell free to give comments
Hi Lincoln,  
  
Here's my analysis of your TED Summary. I hope you can follow through.  
  
- They always ~~obay with the~~obey teacher's instructions, willingness, and desires.  
- However, if(mind the capitalization. do not make it capital if it not necessary) children are...  
- ..., but in this current condition, ~~by the time they get to be adults,~~ most children have lost ~~that creativity~~their creative thinking when they grow up to be adults .  
  
- ~~the~~The issue which should be addressed is about how to remain to be an artist as we grow up.  
  
- Ken Robinson explains that there are two kinds ... Those are:  
  
- Firstly, ~~it~~intelligence is drivers. (what does this even mean?)For instance, we think about the world in (...), we think kin-esthetic-ally, we think in abstract terms and lastly, we think in movement.  
  
As you can see, several modifications have been addressed. I hope this helps :)
Hello Abraham Lincoln,  
  
However, If ~~children~~they [may use adverb] are not prepared to be ...  
  
~~the~~ This issue ~~which~~ should be addressed is how to ...  
  
Ken Robinson explains (EXPLAINED, because it took from recorded video ) that there are two kinds of intelligence ~~are~~ (double verb ):  
  
It More often than not comes about through the interaction ...  
  
hope these help
**The free movement of goods across national borders has long been a controversial issue. Some people argue that it is necessary for economic growth, while others claim that it damages local industries.  
  
Discuss both views and give your own opinion. You should write at least 250 words.**  
  
These days, connecting between a country and another had become important rule particularly in economical dimension which had positif and negatif impact in order for society.  
  
Personally, i believe that this regulation have enormous number of advantages for the domestic market, but the authority have to fit the condition.  
  
This rule has become common in the most country today because it has tremendous benefit. For example, there are many countries that joined into the nation alliance that can allow to trade their local product to other countries. That can rise the provit and increased the economical condition. Then, this rule can also provide dividend from tax of goods that comes from outside country. It has also been profitable line for government.  
  
In contrast, it can give opposite result if local entrepreneur donot have challenging sense. The free movement of goods would relieve local brand field. It happened as people more likely to choose other brand than original brand. On the other hand, people would addict with foreign brand that have low-cost than local brand. It can eliminate native opportunity to develop and to endorse their label.  
  
To sum up, it can provide merit for local brand if the government forearm and have to fit the condition.