dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
There is a bit of a problem in relation to the restatement of the given topic. It is indicated in the restatement that the students "demand" various ways of learning, a claim that is not supported by the original statement. Therefore, the rewording of the original topic is inaccurate and not task compliant. This will result in point deductions in the applicable section of the scoring rubic.  
  
Now, the response of the writer is acceptable but not really focused on the demands of the response question. The writer should notice that he refrained from using personal pronouns of any sort in this writing. While this acceptable for the general discussion, the scores for the C+C section would have been better had the writer used his personal knowledge, experience, or understanding of the topic. This is something best achieved using first person pronouns since the question clearly indicates the need for personal reference points by indicating "To what extent do YOU..." See the clue in the discussion question?  
  
Though not indicated, the writer should have used several personal aspects for this discussion based on the discussion reference point in the given question. It would have been highly acceptable and score boosting if he used personal examples in reference to the differing learning methods as well, leaning on his experience from the lockdown and the prior classroom instruction he received for his courses.
***1. Some people think that being able to communicate with others online is breaking down geographical barriers and enabling people, who would normally never have the chance to meet, to communicate.***  
  
## What are the advantages of international communication online? Are there any disadvantages to this?

  
(250 - 300 words)  
  
My work:  
In the modern era, the dominant of network connected devices like smartphone, i-pad and laptop is a norm in every nations around the globe. Hence, many people praise the usefulness of the ability to communicate via the Internet that those devices enable them to. So, what would be the benefits of online communication? Are there any drawbacks? Personally, I reckon that there are both gains and handicaps when meeting via the Internet which I will explain further into the essay.  
  
First and foremost, communicating through the Internet allows the users to meet up with other anywhere and anytime. This is because of the ability of digital devices, enabling us to call or chat where the network is available. For instance, communicating via Internet has helped our community to thrive and combat contagious diseases like covid-19. Instead of working and meeting directly, people can earn their livelihoods and host meetings via the Internet. Moreover, having the capability of contacting anyone at any time can be a lifesaver in emergency. This stems from the fact that the smartphones have became everyone`s company in their daily life. Thus, calling for help is just one button away. For instance, in many situations like kidnapping, smuggling and so on, the mobile phone has been a great assistant to the police forces in the last decades.  
  
Nevertheless, every coins have two sides and so is the online communication. It is noticeable that contacting via the internet can never reach the full potential of direct meeting since it can cause misunderstanding, uncertainty and distrust. This is because of the absence of body language and the feeling of being connected to each other. For instance, it is more likely to cause an argument when chatting online rather than talking face to face.  
  
To conclude, communicating is a double-edged sword, it grants the users the convenient of communicating online and the capability of calling for help in dire cases. However, it can also cause hatred and misunderstanding when communicating online.  
  
I am going to have a test soon, thank for your help.
The writer failed to keep track of his word count. There is a reason the words are capped at 30O words for this writing. There is no time to write more than that word count if he is focused on reaching a passing score for each scoring section. There is also a distinct possibility that his essay will be cutoff by the system automatically at the 300 count. If the essay submitted does not have a proper conclusion, then it recieves a failing mark.  
  
Rhetoric has no place in the task 2 essay. The writer does not effectively create his discussion summary and their, fails to provide a clear task related opinion. Every question provided requires a summarized response in the first paragraph. What matters here is the writer's ability to deliver a succinct discussion. Do not show off just the LR aspect. That is why this is a failing test. The discussions only present ideas and examples. The actual idea development and explanation is what this essay falls short on.  
  
There are too many examples in the essay. All of which are unrelated to one another thus affecting the C+C score in the presentation. Though the word count is more than met, these did not translate into proper discussion paragraphs. Focus less on the vocabulary and more on proper and full explanation development.
***International travel is becoming cheaper, and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourists.***  
## Do the advantage of increased tourism outweigh its advantage?

  
  
The prices of traveling internationally have been decreasing greatly, resulting in more opportunities for tourists to travel everywhere. From my perspectives, this trend is rather beneficial than disastrous regarding several aspects.  
  
One evident drawback of inexpensive global tourism is more destruction to the environment. Specifically, tourism industry has already been considered to be the major cause of global warming, as it provokes the use of cars, buses and planes that employ non-renewable energy such petrol and release toxic fumes into the atmosphere. Furthermore, not every traveler has environmental awareness, since they believe that it is not their responsibility to protect the environment, leading to many places of interests around the world being covered in trash. Therefore, based on the two reasons above, I claim that the environment will be harshly ruined due ti the rise in tourism.  
  
Notwithstanding, I am of opinion that the growth in tourism gives plentiful benefits to people. First, the employment rates will rapidly skyrocket as more tourism-related jobs such as pilots, tour guides and flight attendants will be increasingly demanded. Second, the locals will intensely benefit from this, because they can open family-owned restaurants or hotels providing services, which affects them positively financially. Finally, the visitors themselves, especially the young, will be able to travel exclusively and frequently without worrying about the costs. They will have the chance to explore the wonders of the world as well as witness various countries' traditions and culture in practice. Hence, the experiences they obtain during the journeys will make them knowledgeable.  
  
In conclusion, although the decrease in the costs of global touri is unfavorable, it is overshadowed by the strength humans get.
The writer has taken an incorrect approach to the discussion. This is actually a comparison essay based upon the discussion question provided. That means the writer should be discussing both the advantage and disadvantage in each of the two reasoning paragraphs. The writer should disprove that the perceived disastrous result actually has potential, misunderstood, or unconsidered benefits. For every disadvantage presented, it should have an alternate believable advantage presentation. That is what the writing instruction is all about and that is what should be presented in the paragraphs.  
  
The current presentation lacks the aforementioned cohesive presentation as required by the prompt. The writer should spend more time on analyzing what the question is actually asking him to write about so that he can use the higher scoring writing format.
***It has been said that people who read for pleasure have more developed imaginations and language skills than people who prefer to watch TV.***  
Do you agree or disagree?  
  
Write at least 250 words and include any relevant example.  
  
MY ESSAY:  
  
It has been argued that reading for pleasure can increase people's imagination as well as language skills more than watching TV. I personally disagree with this point of view and support the opposite side when watching TV could be better in this case.  
  
To commence with, watching TV is a better way of boosting one's imagination than reading for pleasure. When watching TV, we could observe numerous vivid animated pictures, which helps us explore more of the world around human life. Meanwhile, reading could not provide us with a wide range of pictures and especially no lively sound. For instance, some experts have stated that children should be encouraged to watch programs on the animal world or colorful cartoons in order to stimulate their sense of imagination.  
  
In addition, while it is acceptable that reading can be beneficial to improving language skills, I am convinced that watching TV could bring more advantages. Nowadays, the more learning foreign languages become everyone's need, the more active people become in finding the best methods to learn these language skills and most of them opt for learning through programs on TV. People tend to be more attracted to lectures about foreign languages on TV than lessons or funny stories in books. For example, one can develop listening and speaking skills through music programs or hilarious conversations on TV.  
  
In conclusion, while both reading for pleasure and watching TV can be advantageous to improving the sense of imagination and language skills, I firmly believe that we ought to watch TV more often so as to gain more developed imagination as well as linguistic abilities.  
  
(266 words)
The writer has not correctly represented the idea for discussion. A topic was presented as a discussion point, not an argument point. There is no debate present since an opposing opinion was not presented. Rather the student is being asked to present an opinion based on the idea presentation. So there is a slight misrepresentation of the original topic presentation. When it comes to the writer's opinion, a correct format for the response was used, but it was still missing in terms of completeness as there is no summarized reason backing up the personal opinion. The summarized reasons would have solidly laid the foundation for the following discussion paragraphs and also, helped to increase the clarity of the writer, thus adding to his coherence and cohesiveness score for that paragraph. Had these information been properly included, the writer would have been off to a high preliminary score consideration.  
  
While the reasoning for imagination is well developed and believable, the part about language skills development is incorrect or not well developed. The reference to learning languages was good. However, the fact that closed captioning, the main reason why television is more effective in teaching languages, than merely reading translations. A more convincing explanation could have been developed.  
  
The writer should have also used some personal reference points or examples in the presentation since this is a personal opinion based essay. The examples and discussion points are given extra scoring consideration when the writer can connect his personal experience and knowledge in the discussion paragraphs. Yes, first person pronoun usage is encouraged in these prompt types.  
  
While the discussion development is uneven in this presentation, it does not erase the fact that there are lesser mistakes made in terms of scoring considerations this time around. The explanation is also developed in a good manner, but, like I said, could have been been better presented later on. I believe the exam taker stands the chance of getting an average passing score eith this opinion paper.
## The annual rice production of 4 countries

  
  
The bar chart compares four different countries in terms of the amount of rice produced annually in 2005, 2010 and 2015. It is noticeable that the rice production of country A and B overtook that of country C and D by a wide margin. In general, while there was an increase trend in the output of rice in three out of four countries between 2005 and 2015, the figure for country C remained gradually the same.  
  
In 2005, the productivity of rice of the country A was 45 million tonnes, compared to nearly 26 million tonnes of the country B. However, the total outputs of rice in B rose significantly to 43 million tonnes and closely caught up the productivity of A, at 47 million tonnes. The amount of rice per year produced by A kept the same trend and went up to 50 million tonnes in 2015. The figure for the country B bucked the trend with seven million tonnes decrease.  
  
By contrast, the rice industry of the country C and D were considerably lower than other countries, with 5 million tonnes and 2 million tonnes respectively in 2005. By 2015, the amount of rice production of the country C and D shared comparable figures, with 5 million tonnes each.  
  
*
While the essay can still be completed using lesser words, the writer did a pretty good job of completing the task in an understandable manner. I would like to commend the writer for doing a very good job in creating the summary overview + trending statement paragraph as well. It was concise and truly informative for a reader to scan.  
  
That said, I have to comment though on the way that the reporting paragraphs were created. He seemed to focus his information and comparison presentation only on 2005 and 2015 data. He appears to have overlooked the 2010 information from the graph for some reason? Why did that happen? It is important for the writer to remember that all 3 years must be represented in the reporting paragraphs since these were also indicated in the actual image and overview information. It should have been mentioned in some way or manner within the reporting paragraphs as well.
## It has been said that: ''Not all learning takes place in the classroom''.

  
***Compare and contrast knowledge gained from personal experience and with knowledge gained from classroom instruction. In your opinion, which source is more important? Why?***  
  
People often say that not all knowledge is gained from learning in the classroom but also can be derived from personal experience . In my perspective , although both have their own pros and cons , knowledge obtained from experience still seems to be more important .  
  
On the one hand , joining lectures helps us know about academic knowledge of every aspects . These knowledges are actually the products of many experimentions and reasonings passed down from previous generations that is often hard to be fully acknowledged just via studying in classes . Besides , school's lessons orient ourselves in terms of learning direction and also lead us to comprehend the essence of things due to its in-depth theoretics .  
  
On the other hand , learning from experiencing personally is indispensable to every learners . To be more specific , it is considered primary for people to achieve their goals in the future , though graduating from school is the basis of having a job , it is still their experience that helps them in properly dealing with many situations in real life . Therefore , people get less confused when facing with those cases compared with those who just learn in the classrooms . Moreover , it is personal experience that enables people to have a clearest vision and picture of things gained from theoretical classes .  
  
To sum up , to be truly knowledgeable , people must acquire knowledge from both actual life and school instruction . However , they need to apply their knowledge by practicing more and more in real life cases .
The writer missed the point of the discussion. While his perspective tries to covers the general assessment or public perception of the given discussion point, he neglected to reflect on his personal experience as required by the discussion instruction. If he reviews the writing instruction, a clear reference to his personal perspective, based on personal experience can be found in the statement:  
  
Compare and contrast knowledge gained from personal experience  
The reference point is basically asking: "How do you learn best as a person? Are you academic or life experience based by nature?" This is a personal assessment based discussion. That is what the writer missed out on representing in the discussion.  
  
Aside from that missed point, the writer also did not do a good enough job of restating the given topic. It is so close to the original statement that it will definitely be scored based on cut and paste or memorized writing, which not be good for his TA score.
## film industry profits

  
  
The shown line chart demonstrates how much money the film industry made by selling cinema tickets and DVDs in the USA and abroad between 2001 and 2010.  
  
It can be seen clearly that the income from international cinema tickets and DVDs had a very stable growth while the income in the USA didn't change much.  
  
The earnings of the film industry abroad from the two sources were very similar in terms of growth. In 2001, International DVD sales were just around 11 billion whereas the revenue from cinema tickets was approximately 20 billion dollars. They (DVD and cinema ticket sales) rose by over 8 billion dollars by 2004, respectively, to 18,5 billion and 28 billion. After that, they reduced by 2 billion dollars in 2005 but then gradually increased by almost the same earnings. In 2010, the income from international DVD and cinema ticket sales was 23 billion and 33 billion dollars, respectively.  
  
On the other hand, we couldn't see any significant changes in the revenue the film industry in the USA got. In 2001, income from North American DVD sales had an impressive growth to 25 billion dollars in 2004 but then reduced gradually to 18 billion dollars in 2010. The most special is the earnings from cinema tickets. From 2001 to 2010, they just fluctuated around 10 billion dollars.
The essay is overwritten and does not follow the maximum 200 word compliance for the reporting essay. While it is possible to write more words within 20 minutes, that does not assure that one will be providing the proper scoring considerations for this test. Remember that this is not a vocabulary exercise alone but a test of English comprehension and restatement in short form. Hence the maximum word count for the time limit. Keep it short but properly informative.  
  
Do not get into the habit of creating a separate short sentence for the trending statement. The trending statement works best when smoothly integrated into the summary overview. It helps the paragraph meet the 3 sentence minimum requirement and also, helps provide a more concise summary of information that boosts the coherence score for the paragraph.  
  
While the sentences are not always structurally correct, these do not come across as confusing to the reader so while deductions will be applied, it will not be the failing rubic type of score. I should also point out that the writer is expected to remain neutral when writing this report so he should not use any sort of pronoun reference in the essay. That will be a point of deduction as well.
As the first sentence in th summary overview, I have to say that the writer did not do a proper job of summarizing the information in relation to the 2 separate references in the sentence. The first thing the writer needs to remember is that the summary overview needs at least 3 sentences, but is considered complete with a total of 5 sentences in the paragraph. A sentence also represents one idea reference per line. In this case, the sentences should contain 2 related information references. The first sentence, should indicate what information is provided and then list the related references. The second sentence, the global reference should also contain the listing for global participants. A sentence is considered complete when it contains a subject and a predicate of related topics. This sentence does not accomplish that as it represents differing information sources only. It is not predicated on a proper reference / listing. It is nothing more than a run on sentence that does not create a solid summarized reference for the report.
I am a returning student, and I haven't written in years. English is also my second language. I appreciate it if someone can give me some feedback and advice.  
  
## The summary should be 100-300 words.

  
  
My summary:  
The article "Obesity Can Trim 10 years Off Life" (2009) by Nanci Hellmich warns that obesity shortens life, and its effects rival those of smoking. Obesity causes heart disease and stroke which can reduce lifespan depending on whether an individual is overweight, obese or very obese; it ranges from a year for adults who are overweight to as much as 10 years for those who are very obese. The article presents a study reporting that a third of American adults are obese, and these same individuals are continually gaining weight. Finally, the article alerts that obesity is becoming a serious health concern and advises that we take actions now.  
  
Existing beliefs suggest that the obesity epidemic is caused by a combination of inactivity and excess calorie intake, but how much is each contributing to the problem? New research in the article "Too Many Calories Are to Blame For Obesity Surge, Not Lack of Exercise, Claim Scientists" (2009) by a Daily Mail reporter confidently suggests that excess calorie intake is more likely to be the cause of the rise in obesity than a lack of exercise. The study, conducted by Australian scientists at Deakin University, reveals that Americans may have been in fact increasing their amount of exercise over the past 30 years, yet the problem persists and expands. This implies that increasing physical activity as a solution is ineffective. The article concludes that existing and potential health policies should focus on reducing daily calorie intake.  
  
This is 245 words.  
  
Thank you.
The first article does not fully summarize the article effectively as it fails to present a clear idea of the basis of the information presented. What was the study that was used to create the basis of this presentation? Why should that source be believed? Why is it authoritative? The writer should not only focus on the content of the article, for both articles, he must represent the sources that make these information believable.  
  
In the second article, he fails to present the name of the writer, making the full article summary questionable. Both articles do not include the method by which the researches were completed and what pool of participants were involved. So the summary is incomplete and lacking in definitive information.  
  
Such summary writing can be expected of ESL students and those who were not educated in the UK or USA. This is not the type of summarized academic writing that will acceptable at any of the educational institutions of the aforementioned countries.