Gang, while there was an improvement in the way that you presented this essay, I still noticed that you struggled to write it because of the way you formatted the paragraphs. The overall score for this essay will still be a 6 because of some limitations that you have in your presentation. Let me see... I think the best way to explain to you how to write this essay type is to show you how it should be written. I hope that I will not be insulting you by showing you how I would write this essay below. Here it goes:  
  
*There are 2 illustrations presented for review. The illustrations provide the before and after images of an island that was developed for tourism purposes. A number of significant differences between the two images can be noted in the presentations. In this essay, I will describe the differences between the two images based on the before and after illustrations.  
  
Before the island development was completed, the area was just a vast, vacant island located 100 meters from the sea. The only structures on the land mass were composed of scattered Palm trees. The island did not have any other greenery and did not have any residents living in it at the time. An undeveloped beachfront was located at the left most tip of the island. This pristine parcel of land and water was later developed into an impressive beachfront tourist property.  
  
After the development, the beachfront property still had a coastline 100 meters from the sea. The beach water area was developed into a swimming space due to several tourist developments across the island. The property, formerly devoid of residents, now had a pier to welcome the boats of tourists to the island. From the pier, the guests checked in at the reception area before proceeding to one of several hut-like accommodations on the island. Meals were served at the restaurant located at the very back of the island, behind the reception area.  
  
It is notable to mention that the Palm trees that were plentiful before the development were cut down to make way for the buildings and changes to the property. Therefore only a handful of the topiary remained after the construction of the island facilities was completed. Overall, the greens on the island underwent significant changes in order to become tourist ready.  
  
In addition to the structural changes on the island, some road improvements such as footpaths and vehicle tracks were added. This resulted in an island that cannot be identified as similar to the original state presented. All of these were due to the marked tourism improvements made to the area.*  
  
Note the method of presentation that I used in the essay. The description was at par with the provided images and it provided information that always applied to the present information. Certain assumptions could be safely made such as tourists arriving by boat because of the addition of the pier and the lack of other possible access routes to the island. Therefore, what should be implied information becomes factual based upon common sense and logic. The full use of the 5 sentences per paragraph allowed for a more complex LR presentation and GRA structure. The score for this sort of presentation will never be lower than a 9.