dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
## The problem of noise pollution

  
  
Some people think that there should be some strict controls about noise. Others think that they could just make as much noise as they want. Discuss both views and give your opinion.  
  
Some see no problem with noise and argue for the right to make noise however they like. Other, myself included, advocate for the implementation of stricter noise regulation.  
  
To begin with, there are two main reasons why a number of people are against strict noise controls. First, youngsters enganging recreational activities tend to creating more noise by doing that they feel more comfortable and free. Many of them get relaxed by listening high -volume piped music when playing video game at entertainment centers. Second, certain groups of workers have considered to noise created by power-tools as an unavoidable part of the workday. In order to make their work done, carpenters and welders alike need the help of drills or hammers that generate noise in the process.  
  
Noise opponents, however, believe that it is more beneficial to impose some laws to control the noise produced. The first reason is that too much noise is detrimental for the listener's overall wellbeing. Constant exposure noise, for instance, people not only suffer hearing loss but also face the developing risk of cardiovascular problems. Additional, noise emitted in the carpender's shop or weldering workshop which is norm for who works there but that is a nuisance to the others in the neighborhood. Without strict regulation, immoderate noise has a negative influence on the locals, leaving them chronically sleep- deprived and easily distracted.  
  
Many people cite entertainment or work as reasons to make noise that is unreasonable if the noise exceeds recommended levels. Noise generation should be properly monitored for the common good of whole community.
Minh, before I delve into the composition problems of your I would like to show you the simpler problems first that can easily be addressed by you simply being more careful when writing the essay.  
  
Spelling problems:  
enanging = engaging  
centers = centres (UK spelling difference)  
carpender's = carpenter's  
weldering = welding  
neighborhood = neighbourhood (UK spelling difference)  
  
Grammar Issues:  
Reflexive pronoun - myself = I  
Verb form = creating = create  
Comparative form - ... comfortable and free = ... comfortable and freer  
  
The discussion presentation that you offer is not complete. There is a discussion of the two public points of view and a reference to a personal opinion in your prompt paraphrase, but no actual explanation of how you developed that opinion within the required 3 reasoning paragraphs. That is an important, missing discussion point that has resulted in a tangential response on your part, which will lead to a lowering of the essay score in the end because there is a lack of discussion points as per prompt requirements. Even though you wrote 256 words, it will not matter because the discussion points are incomplete.
QUESTION: MANY MUSEUMS CHARGE FOR ADMISSION WHILE OTHERS ARE FREE. DO YOU THINK THE ADVANTAGES OF CHARGING PEOPLE FOR ADMISSION TO MUSEUMS OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGES?  
  
## Museum's tickets for free or not?

  
  
It is certainly the case that many museum charge with people who visit. I think that is advantage to people and museum mutually. In the following essay, I will give some of my opinions and reasons.  
  
There are many museums and exhibitions being held by some personal artists and companies. Compared to governments, they have power depends on promote policy and foundation by tax. it is easier to achieve and construct a museum. On the other hand, the museum built by company that need to strike a balance between income and expenses carefully, If museums don't charge by the tickets. It might work in difficulty.  
  
Another reason is about the safety. Tourists or visitors were gotten paid by museum, that will prevent some person who is a potential danger to the artwork, like kids. The incomes could enhance the security system.  
  
In conclusion, charging with people for admission is a positive way to maintain a museum. Moreover, it will make the art industry get more improved and friendly. Having admission will reduce the number of visitor like some family, kids. But without kids laughing, I think it can make people feel atmosphere in museum more comfortable.  
  
Can you mark me based on IELTS band score and give some advise.  
Thank you.
Pei, I cannot give this essay a passing score because it will automatically receive a failing score of 1. That is the score that is given to any essay that does not meet the minimum word requirement of 250 words. You wrote 196 words so your essay is short of the requirement by 54 words. Appropriate TA point deductions will be implemented for the missing word count. That is why your work cannot receive a passing score. None of the paragraphs are fully explained, developed, and presented to the examiner. The work is sloppy. Once the word deductions are added to the other deductions based on the remaining 3 scoring considerations, there is absolutely no way that you can achieve a passing score. Always aim to write at least 250 words if you want to be sure of at least meeting the TA requirements and avoid point deductions for the missing word count. If you write 250 words, then your essay can be scored based on all 4 scoring considerations.
## the use of animals in these times

  
  
*Task 2: In the modern world, it is no longer necessary to use animals as food or to use animal products for, for example, clothing and medicines. To what extent do you agree or disagree?*  
  
In recent years, we have seen an increase in the number of people using animals for various industries from food to clothing to medicine. While I accept that killing animals for certain purposes such as fashion should be restricted, I lean towards the viewpoint that to avoid purely using animals in food or medicine is an impractical task.  
  
On the one hand, the government should introduce a restriction on using animals, especially livestock, for clothing. It is compelling evidence that these days the rich trend to show off their opulence through luxurious clothes which are made from fur animals and have exorbitant prices. This will result in that numerous rare animals killed by renowned fashion companies to meet these demands. As a consequence of this tendency, there is a wide range of animals be on the brink of extinction. Thus, imposing more rigorous punishments of hunting animals for clothing purpose is necessary.  
  
On the other hand, it is nearly impossible to halt using animals for food and medical research altogether. It is apparent that meat plays an indispensable role in various cuisines all over the world in virtue of its major source of vitamins and proteins, and this supplies sufficiently energy and nutrient for human activities. Similarly, animals also contribute to medical researches as they are used to test the reactions and effectiveness of new drugs. Only by testing firstly on animals can medical practitioners enhance the quality of medicines for the human. Korean doctors, as an example, was able to save a plethora of patients struggling with lung cancer by taking new safe drugs, which would have been impossible without testing the medicine in rats beforehand.  
  
In conclusion, using animals in clothing might be not necessary for human, but it seems to me that to prohibit consuming meat or testing drugs on animals is more likely to be not feasible.
Zombu, this is an extent response essay. That means that you cannot just "lean towards" an opinion, you actually need to present a measured response with regards to the opinion that you are supporting. To what extent can be measured as "partially, fully, wholeheartedly, totally, completely" and other similar measured word descriptions. The keywords should be found in your response to show that you are accurately responding to the task. Without it, this is just another single opinion agree/disagree essay, which it isn't. That, is why this essay does not address the prompt properly. You ended up discussing the topic in a comparative manner that does not really illustrate a measured response as required. The essay will be seen as having changed the discussion topic and prompt requirements and will therefore not be given a passing score. Your discussion runs counter to the actual requirements of the discussion and cannot be given a passing TA score because of it. Once you get a low TA score, the cumulative scoring will result in a non passing score.
## Why kids should be productive with their time?

  
  
**Some people think that children's free time must include educational activities otherwise they will waste their time.  
What is your opinion?**  
  
People think that children have to do study in their spare time for their time will not wasted.  
While I believe that they should study in their lesuire, They should attend some sport courses.  
  
Children must study in their free time, but not only study, they should attend some of sports. Learning also useful for the future.  
It helps to find their future way. And sport helps to keep physical fit and also children must get relax in their free time. This is also helps to them for knowledge.  
  
On the other hand, they can only be busy with sports. For example, football, box and many type of national sports. Becouse, nowadays many sporters take any kind of presents for their games. And actually they even get houses, cars and also money. It can be career for their future.  
  
In my opinion, children spend their lesuire with attend one of the sport and study what they want.
Dear Jas,  
This is a writing task 2 that needs at least 250 words. You did present your point but have not supported it well. Please support your points with more explanations and examples.  
  
You also made alot of spelling and grammar mistakes such as for "..." (this should be "will not bewasted"), "Thisis also helps" (you should use is or helps not both),Becouse. These can be easily corrected by spelling check in Winword.  
  
Please correct these. Happy writing!
Jasur, the direct question essay must be discussed from a single point of view. Not a comparative point of view. Note that the prompt is asking "What is your opinion" not "What are your opinions", which would be the plural form of opinion which would have allowed you to discuss the essay from multiple points of view. As such, the essay will fail not only because of the lacking word requirement, but because you showed an inability to address the task achievement requirements for the discussion. It is always important to discuss the essay based on the expected discussion slant. All Task 2 essays are written from singular points of view unless otherwise stated. The idea is to be able to fully explain your opinion regarding a topic throughout the 4-5 paragraph essay. It is easier to defend a single point of view rather than multiple points of view. You don't have to waste time thinking of 2 discussion modes in a direct question / opinion essay. You can better improve your scores when you focus on only one topic for discussion. In this instance, it is clear that you are preparing for the test without guidance. So you should review the various samples available at this forum to learn from and help guide the development of your Task 2 writing skills.
*Question: Many students have to study subjects which they do not like. Some people think this is a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?*  
  
## uninterested subjects at school

  
  
There are ongoing debates about whether students should be forced to learn subjects that they are not interested in. I, personally, disagree with the point of view stated that studying subjects covered all areas of knowledge is a total waste of time.  
  
In my opinion, each subject, especially in primary and secondary schools, has its own function in the mission of building a complete picture of fundamental knowledge as well as skills for the students. For example, many students argue that they have no talent in music or art so studying these two classes is useless to them. However, such classes are designed not for the purpose of giving awards for gifted students but to bring out the creativity in every child in the school. Another subject that is indispensable in every school despite receiving a lot of dislike from pupils all around the world is physical education. If students stayed on their seats all days without taking part in any sport classes, there would be a possibility that they might get some problems with their spines and muscles.  
  
Moreover, there is no guarantee that children would not overcome their disfavor for the subject after they actually study it. I believe that the role of teachers accounts for a part of their students' behaviour in the class. Some classes might be boring to learners at first, but if the teacher has an attention-grabbing approach to the subject, they might change their minds in the end. For instance, a history class would be more exciting with a session where students can act like historical figures and perform ancient events. Directly involving in the lessons would definitely raise students' interest in the subject.  
  
In conclusion, I believe it is necessary for students to study all subjects in the school whether they like these classes or not.  
  
*Can you mark me based on IELTS band score.  
Thank you.*
Hello angella1706,  
  
You need to state your position on whether or not studying uninteresting subjects is a waste of time. Your opening sentence, instead, debates about whether students should be forced to study these subjects.  
  
The main idea sentence of the 3rd paragraph is quite confusing to understand. I think you're saying that there are chances that children would change their mind after taking these classes.  
  
I'm preparing for the test myself so I can't give you estimated band score. Maybe some experienced contributor will be able to help you on that.
The world of work is changing rapidly and employees cannot depend on having the same job or the same working conditions for life. Discuss the possible causes for this rapid change, and suggest ways of preparing people for the world of work in the future.  
  
## The fast change

  
  
In recent decades, there has been growing a trend in making alterations of works and which have been causing change in applying for the same job and the same working conditions of life of workers. Although, this immediate change causes a plenty of beneficial results, candidates need to have preparations of their life for the world of work in the coming time.  
  
On the one hand, there are a great deal of results for the rapid change of the world of work. Firstly, a part of this change is caused by the new industrial revolution which has been playing an extremely vital role in recent time. Artificial intelligence, for example, is the key in this revolution, making quality of human life more convenient and modern than the past because machine represents human in manual works. Secondly, this change has been making a lot of diverse works for human. In fact, the rate of poverty decreases significantly by change of the world of work, making human life more affluent and making a civilized and modern social life.  
  
On the other hand, because of speedy change, human would prepare a several ways in studying and working. First, student should be more conscious of cutting-edge technology and concentrate more about subjects which related to science and technology. For instance, government should encourage student study physic and chemistry and contribute money for geniuses who gained certain achievements to help students have necessary knowledge for applying for jobs in the future. Moreover, workers need to develop themselves for fast changing working environment. In fact, the science improvement claims human should be self-conscious, which helps them are not obsolete when the world is progressing day to day.  
  
In conclusion, the fast change is the reason that make human have to alter his job and working condition but the results that it bring which is completely advantage for our life.
Hello dinhphong,  
  
Firstly, the prompt has never mentioned any trend in making alterations of works so I think your attempt to paraphrase here is misleading.  
  
I think your answer in this essay has deviated from the question. The prompt asks for the causes of the change while you're discussing the results in the 1st body paragraph.  
  
In body 2, you suggest that students should focus on taking science and technology courses to prepare for work in the future but you haven't provided the reason why that is.
## reducing traffic congestion

  
  
**Essay topics: Some people believe government should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion. Discuss both views and give your opinion.**  
  
People have argued that the authorities should utilise their funds and budgets on developing streets and highways rather than on public transportation areas. As far as I concerned, the advantage of investing in public transport systems always outweighs that of remain option.  
  
On the one hand, a group of people think that the government should focus on improving their street and highway facilities since several reasons. First of all, having a better quality of them would raise the levels of safety for people and clear traffics. To be more specific, adding and enlarging more lanes and routes make not only fluent traffic of means of transportation but also declining in road mortality and injury rates. Secondly, enhancing on road networks helps restrain traffic congestion. Because of broad roads, everyone has maximum free-flowing traffics instead of limit of moving in rush hour times from 8.00 AM to 4.00 PM in Ho Chi Minh city and it is an outstanding example.  
  
Although, investing in road networks possesses immediately potential advantages, it can not be compared with public transport. First reason is that high-capacity public transport can accommodate larger number of passengers in comparison with vehicles at same time. Take a bus has double size towards a sedan could carry forty people instead of four spaces as an clear example. Finally, a mode shift from private to efficient public transport systems contributes to a green environment. Besides, taking public transit, carpool or riding a bicycle play a vital role in progressing of low-carbon lifestyle.  
  
It is obvious to me to conclude that national leaders should spend money on public transportation is a potential step to come to the sustainable development for high quality of social life.
Nguyen, your essay does not follow the discussion prompt as it is provided. This is a 5 paragraph essay that follows the 3 reasoning paragraph format to represent:  
  
1. Public POV 1  
2. Public POV 2  
3. Personal POV  
The way that you formatted the prompt paraphrase created a prompt deviation as you changed the discussion instruction from:  
  
*Prompt Version: Discuss both views and give your opinion.  
Your Version: As far as I concerned, the advantage of investing in public transport systems always outweighs that of remain option.*  
  
There was never an instance in this essay when you discussed the two POV's in a manner that would show how these opinions influenced your point of view. You just decided to discuss your point of view. Even worse, your response changed the prompt topic later on in the presentation:  
  
*Original Topic: Some people believe government should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion.  
  
Your Topic: Although, investing in road networks possesses immediately potential advantages, it can not be compared with public transport.*\  
  
The original prompt never asked you to compare the investment in roadwork with public transport so why did you do that? You clearly have a problem understanding English instructions which is why your essay kept moving away from the original instructions. This will result in a failing score during an actual test because you will not have properly delivered on the Task Accuracy requirements.  
  
Please work on improving your English comprehension skills. Review the available essays at this forum so that you can better understand how to properly respond to the prompt requirements. Prompt deviations will never be good for your score during the actual test. It could result in an automatic failing grade in the end.
## school success of a child thanks to whom?

  
  
First of all, classmates can help us deal with our work at the school which hardly any parents can do. They can help us solve the maths or English, find out our mistakes in each exam, or something else. Parents have some generation gaps which made them can't catch up with our study. For example: if you have a big math problem that you can't solve, your parents can't help you because they forget or don't know how to deal with it, but your friends can do. They also can find out other ways to solve the problems more quickly and easily. We can learn so much from them.  
  
Second, maybe sometimes parents have put us under pressure because of the mark at school. No matter how hard you try, your score seldom satisfies your parents easily. Classmates are known more about our school's mark. They know which exam is hard and which one is easy so they can sympathetic with us easier. And they encourage us to try hard for the next exam.  
  
And the last, classmates are a motivation for us to try hard more and more to get good marks, they learn with us, point out our mistake to makes us better for the next time. They encourage us when we disappointed because of the bad mark. They help us a lot with our study in the school.  
  
So, we sure that classmates have a big influent on the children's' success at school.
Bich, the term is "influence" not influent. Also, is this an IELTS Task 2 essay? Or was this just written for an English writing exercise? You haven't provided me with enough instructional information to properly assess your work so I will have to go the general review route with you. For all intents and purposes, I will assume that you have to write this in UK English since you are from Vietnam.  
  
You should use concise language when writing academically. Don't use word fillers such as "First of all". Always go the direct route and say "First". The phrase "maybe sometimes" portrays uncertainty in your presentation. Which is it? Maybe? Or Sometimes? Maybe means "perhaps" while "sometimes" means "certain instances". Which is it? Do you see how there is a lack of clarity in the sentence when you use uncertain phrase portrayals?  
  
Just all other ESL writers, you tend to use contractions when writing academically. Please note that academic writing requires the use of formal English words, therefore contractions are unacceptable in written presentations. You also tend to use memorized phrases such as "more and more" rather than using more complex vocabulary that helps to improve your writing skills such as the word "increasingly" which means the same thing as "more and more" but is seen as more advanced terminology in academic writing.