dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
## Every house has its own story

  
  
*IN SOME COUNTRIES, MORE AND MORE PEOPLE ARE BECOMING INTERESTED IN FINDING OUT ABOUT THE HISTORY OF THE HOUSE OR BUILDING THEY LIVE IN  
  
WHAT ARE REASONS FOR THIS?  
  
HOW CAN PEOPLE RESEARCH THIS?*  
  
There was a common assumption that residents are considering a host of backgrounds belonging to the previous occurrences that happened to the house or department they live in. Whilst there are various reasons for this situation, I have a strong conviction that peoples are concerning about the safety issue. Apparently, the owners have hundreds of ways to find out this topic to fulfill their curiosity as well as their personal purposes by asking the seller or just simply searching on the internet.  
  
The main reason for this interest is that peoples worry about their safety. As we know, the life standard is improving significantly due to the development of technology and human's demand. In this regard, peoples have more choices and opportunities to choose a perfect house for them and their families as well. In most cases, the owners do not want to buy a house that have a bad history such as accidents or safety system problems for example. Knowing more about the condition and prior events somehow benefits buyers with wiser options. Additionally, a better knowledge about the place that we will properly settle down for a long time is never be an awful thinking. In fact, almost every customers ask carefully for the full information of the house or department that they intend to buy and try to avoid ones that occurred nasty things in the past.  
  
From a personal perspective, I firmly believe that peoples can easily look for detail instructionS about the history of their houses. In the most convenient way, we can ask the previous owners or the agencies that sell us the apartment, they must be well-known about the place and they have the responsibility to tell us the truth if they want to sell the house quickly and trustworthily. In other hand, websites on the internet also a beneficial method to search for the information as well as find out some reviews about houses, especially apartments and buildings. In this case, peoples are enabled to access into building's website to know more about them. Furthermore, joining some house's groups may provide essential history about places and events that happened in the past of the building. For example, before deciding to buy a house in district two in Ho Chi Minh city, my family considered carefully the origins of the house from my uncle and the seller.  
  
To sum up, having a flawless accommodation require a number of factors. Society are spending more conscious thinking about the historical issues of houses they dwell in due to their own safety. According to this, we now can connect to diversionary sources to find out the facts that we want to know such as asking other people and surfing social networking sites for further relevant data.
A 460 word essay cannot be written within a 40 minute time frame. The essay is overwritten and misuses English vocabulary quite often. An error often found in wordy essays. A failing essay always stems from an over-discussion. Writers who focus on producing long essays are only concerned with their vocabulary score. Not the LR, C + C, or GRA passing considerations. This essay is one of those essay types.  
  
LR issues abound throughout the article that it would be impossible for me to pick all of these out for correction. I will however, point one out. A department is a section in a workplace. An apartment is a rented dwelling. In terms of GRA errors, one of the areas you should review in writing rules would be the way of writing plural words (people is already the plural of the same word. ) The writer does not consider word usage accuracy/ applicability in his writing.  
  
The writer shows a clear understanding of the topic and writing guidelines. Sadly, his over-eagerness to show off his vocabulary skills made the essay recieve deductions over- all. This is too bad because a 300 word essay, targeting all the scoring criteria would have gotten him an excellent, if more than simply passing score.
## Essay about technology

  
  
An increasing number of people are now using the internet to meet new people and socialise. Some people think this has brought people closer together while others think people are becoming more isolated. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.  
  
It is widely acknowledged that the Internet has transformed the way that people communicate with others. Some argued that people are more likely to feel lonely, while others claimed that the internet enables individuals to connect closely. This essay will discuss both these points of view and argue in favor of the latter.  
  
It might be claimed that the massive usage of smartphones and social media could contribute to loneliness. The main reason is people often pay attention to their mobile phones rather than engage in face-to-face interaction with a friend who sits next to them, which poses a threat to relationships in real life. According to the latest study conducted by the ministry of health in Taiwan, one-third of people suffered from mental illness, such as loneliness, because of addiction to social media.  
  
In contrast, there are several reasons why the internet is considered beneficial to socialize. To begin with, it allows people to contact others regardless of geographical distance. That is to say, because of the development of the internet, people can easily send a message or a mail to their friends or relatives who live in different cities, or even other nations. Facebook, for example, enables users to chat or have a free call to their friends around the world, which helps to cultivate friendships. Moreover, owing to social networking, single people can simply have a date with each other and foster romantic relationships. For example, in 2019 it was reported in The New York Times that over 30% of Americans have met their partner online.  
  
In conclusion, although it is undeniable that the internet may make people feel a sense of isolation in some ways, I believe that if people use it properly, they will develop intimate relationships and connections.
The writer should not be arguing in this essay as the writing instruction is only asking for an opinion. The difference between the two words is what will set the response accuracy score:  
  
Argue - verb, to present reasons for or against a thing:  
Opinion - noun, a belief or judgment that rests on grounds insufficient to produce complete certainty.  
  
Do not argue when one is not asked to do so in the instruction. That is a change in discussion direction that will garner a failing TA score.  
  
The essay does not have a clear personal opinion presented. A task 2 essay will lose points for presenting a non-defined personal opinion in the closing summary. That will be due to an incorrect response presentation format and lack of explanation development in relation to the personal opinion.
***Task 2: Some people feel that entertainers (e.g. film stars, pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money.***  
## do you agree or disagree?

  
## Which other types of jobs should be highly paid?

  
  
One of the most important industries with a nation is entertainment industry, which fosters the develelopment of this country's economy. Therefore, many people argue that artists related to this field are paid too much money such as film stars, pop musicians or sport stars. Howerver, I disagree with the opinion given, because I believe there are several reasons to admit that they deserve what they contribute.  
  
In my opinion, there are two obvious factors why entertainers should be well-paid. Firstly, entertainment performances bring us the relaxation, excitement during boring and depression time. According to a survey, people spent most their spare time on watching entertainment shows to be inspired and motivated to have a better life through artists' vivid experience. Secondly, entertainers have been practicing for many times to bring the best quality performances to audiences. They have gone through severe training and taken many risks during their practice time, which sometimes result to both mental and physical health problems.  
  
In addition, I also think that there are other professions besides film, music, sport sector should also be highly paid. For instance, some careers related to military or army officials which people in this field devote their whole life for their jobs and being ready to take risks anytime. Moreover, some occupations such as teaching, doctors, politics, etc. which contribute to the long-term countries' development as well as take the high responsibilities and high level of perception, also deserve high salary. Well-paid is an effective method to attract such potential people to make sure of the sustainable growth of countries.  
  
To conclude, I believe that entertainers should have high pay that they deserve. Besides, other types of jobs which involved high risks, responsibilities and skills also be paid well.
The writer has several spelling (e.g. develelopment= development) and word reference (e.g. with a nation = within a nation) errors in the essay. These show that the writer was not concerned about the quality of the work. There was no effortto submit a high quality piece of writing in relation to scoring as the writer made no effort to proofread, edit, and correct the errors. The essay will have deductions due tothe carelessness of the with when it comes to the final presentation The writer opted to submit a draft for scoring and will get the results such half-baked work deserves.  
  
The reference to a survey is another mistake as a survey is related to researched information. This reference runs counter to the requirement of info being based on personal experience or knowledge, and publicly known information. These elements do not require reference to researched data.
## Competition with the team or as a single player

  
  
Whether participating in team sports like football or individual sports such as tennis or swimming is a major topic of concern in today's world. While some people believe that playing individual sports is better, there are more persuasive reasons why people should also spend time playing team sports in everyday life.  
  
On the one hand, there are some reasons to believe that taking time to play solo sports provides positive aspects. The primary reason is that it helps individuals to enhance their personal skills, not only helping them to manage emotions but also creating the ability to cope with stress. As a matter of fact, people tend to not rely on other support, in order to learn how to cultivate and maximize personal capacities in sports. Gymnastics, for example, each person is able to organize the schedule and be active in their daily practice, rather than depend on others and keep delaying the tasks. Another significant reason is that individual sports are good ideas for people who are interested in challenging activities, which enhance specific skills in setting goals and achieving their personal bests.  
  
On the other hand, there is compelling evidence that each individual should assume the benefits of participating in sports that are played in teams. This is mainly because it provides opportunities to develop interpersonal skills such as communication and teamwork in social life. In other words, this helps people to build their confidence and self-esteem at the workplace or at school to achieve the best performance and tends to be highly recommended for a promotion in a company. In addition to this, team sports are able to create potential opportunities to develop a sense of unity and establish long-term relationships among their friends. For instance, playing in a football team makes them feel a part of something, after attending various competitions people could learn from their failures, realize their importance as a member of the team, and also reduce anxiety to create a positive environment in the game.  
  
In conclusion, although it is often believed that people should take part in individual sports, there are stronger reasons why participating in team sports is also necessary. It is recommended that everyone should play sports that are most interesting to them, all sports are advantageous for people's mental and physical health in daily lives.
The prompt restatement is good but lacking one representative discussion. The writer should not have used a general reference point for the personal opinion as that was a required opinion presentation in the paragraph. The presentation compliance in that section could have been clearer.  
  
There are too many reasons presented per paragraph. not all the reasons are clearly and completely developed though. That happens because of the brief second reasons in each paragraph. If there isn't enough room to fully explain the second reason, then do not present it. A better score is applied to a single full reason rather than 2 unevenly explained reasons.  
  
The writer is explaining all of the opinions from a personal point of view. This is an incorrect format presentation as the validity explanation from a public perspective (They, other) disappears. The personal opinion is always presented as a 3rd paragraph or, as a part of the opposition /support statement at the end of the public opinion explanation.  
  
The statement of recommendation is notgoing to help this essay because it is not a suggested discussion topic in the original. Always discuss per requirements only.
are there somebody can help me with this essay and give me an IELTS score :)  
  
## Shopping location preferences

  
  
There is an increasing preference for driving to shop in large urban malls instead of driving to small town-center retailers. This leads to a number of consequences, including a rise in cars. Although there are some benefits of this trend, I would argue that there are far more drawbacks.  
  
On the one hand, there are a number of advantages of driving to large out-of-town stores. To begin with, shopping in city-suburban relieve pressure on housing supply systems. This is because shopping at out-of-town stores encourages people to move to out-of-town areas for living. To illustrate, Ho Chi Minh city is faced with overpopulation so when these citizens moved to other suburban places such as the Nha Be district will reduce the number of people living in the central of the city. In addition, the air pollution will reduce when there are fewer cars in city centers. In Ho Chi Minh city, when people move to Cu Chi for shopping, the gases from the exhaust will decrease in District 1.  
  
On the other hand, I would argue that these benefits are outweighed by the drawbacks. Firstly, local people will be put into inconvenience since they are difficult in traveling to a distant place to shop. For example, a lot of people living in District 6 do not have their private cars and it seems to be long-distance when they want to buy something at Dau Moi Market in Hoc Mon or Cu Chi. Secondly, driving to large out-of-town stores increase the unemployment rate in the local area because more malls will be located at other ot-of-town stores. When more stores open in out-of-town areas, these employers want to recruit their employees who live in nearer places in order to convenience in works. It might cause to unbalance career rate in that city.  
  
In conclusion, while I recognized the possible advantages of this trend, I believe these advantages are overshadowed by the disadvantages of the aforementioned arguments.
The essay will automatically receive a failing score because of 2 reasons:  
- Prompt deviation  
- Response is unrelated to the task  
  
This is a 5 paragraph essay that should have provided 3 paragraph explanations based on 3 provided questions:  
- What is the advantage of shopping in a shopping center?  
- What is the advantage of shopping in a local market?  
- What is your preference?  
  
The author clearly wrote a response that does not apply to the provided oqquestions. Therefore, this essay was an exercise in futility. It was marked to fail the minute the essay responded with:  
  
I would argue that there are far more drawbacks.  
The clear misunderstanding of the writing requirement and how to respond to it shows the degree by which the writer does not understand the English language.
## WRITING TASK 2- WORKING FROM HOME

  
  
TOPIC: There are more workers to work from home and more students to study from home. This is because computer technology is more and more easily accessible and cheaper. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?  
  
It is true that people tend to work and study from home due to the advancements of computer technology and its economic benefits. While I accept working from home has several benefits, I believe that the development of working and studying online is a negative trend.  
  
If employees and students use their home as a working or studying environment, they can address two main issues. Firstly, they may save time and pay less money on commuting from home to office or school. In other words, instead of being stuck in traffic jams during peak hours or suffering from a lengthy commute, people can have an online meeting at home, which can lead to lower cost of transportation. Secondly, in terms of environmental issues, it is likely that we can reduce the effects of temperature on the volume of gas emissions from private cars and motors. By limiting the number and length of their journeys, it is able to cut down on exhaust fumes releasing from vehicles.  
  
On the other hand, while teleworking might have some benefits, it seems to me that working and studying online is not a good way due to some negative reasons. The first reason is that workers might be challenged with the security concerns. For those who have a job at banks, they will find it difficult to access data which are saved and protected on central's server. When they want to get more information, they need to enter complex code to be able to pass the tight of security system, for example. In addition, remote working encourages a sedentary lifestyle in the long term. People will spend less time doing exercise because they force themselves to stick their eyes to computer's screen every day and it can increase the risk of a physical health such as obesity and myopia.  
  
In conclusion, while I accept that the development of internet can help people work and study more effectively, I believe that working and studying from home is a negative trend.
The writer did a very strong representation of the discussion topics. The clear - that created the discussion outline was truly on point. The problem of the writing lies in the error in relation to the evidence of support for the opinion. The examiner will disregard the first paragraph based on the support for the opposing opinion. As a single opinion discussion, the focus is on 2 reasons supporting the given opinion. There is no comparative instruction so the need to support both sides is not required.  
  
The exam taker will then be scored on the basis of an under developed opinion reason. No score will be given for the irrelevant paragraph. I supporting paragraphs are the standard reasoning paragraph requirement for the prompt. There is a strong possibility the essay will not get a passing score because of this.
***Some people think money spent on developing technology of space exploration is not justifiable.  
They believe there are more beneficial ways of spending the money.***  
## To what extend do you agree or disagree?

  
  
Nowadays, solutions for many incessant global issues existence has just been still un-known question, with the ceaseless curiosity, mankind has never stopped making efforts into outer-space explorations for extraterrestrial life forms and new planets. But some people claimed that it is inappropriate and there are still more beneficial ways of spending money. Personally thinking, I will challenge this school of thought.  
  
First and the foremost, the Earth has been fallen into serious circumstance with an abundance of issues which directly prevent global people from having a qualified life. In addition, the proportion of children were born yearly and rate of elderly have strongly developed and do not have any signs of decline, this will lead to deficiency of accommodation, occupation, foodstuff, etc. For instance, children, especially in many over-crowded countries like India, who were born will not have enough places or nutrition to grow normally as others children. Moreover, industrialization in developing countries also bitterly affects environment through companies' fume releases or excessive exploitation of natural resources and energy. This lead to a high damaged and lack to people's life and health and a large amount of money has been allocating to address these problems. Therefore, it is substantial to explore a new form of life outer-space for high demands of better living.  
  
On the other hand, it is possible to say that with the assistance of advanced facilities, human finally can explore deeper the vast universe and visiting another planet is no longer become impossible task. Thanks to incessant development of technology especially in cosmology, this field has grown in a startling pace and day-by-day brings mankind closer to the universe. Regardless of how much budget were spend on researching or traveling into space, the progress has its unique advantages and play a pivotal role in widening people's knowledge about anything outside our "home''. Moreover, Novel opportunities ranging from space tourism to mining for valuable rare metals could be also enormously profitable  
  
In conclusion, this development brings to mankind huge knowledge and value exploration. However; I cannot posit that this is the only way for governments in finding solution for human issues, especially to developing or poor countries which need a big preference on addressing issues about standard living of residents.
The first sentence of the just sentence is nothing more than an excercise in incorrect vocabulary usage and, incoherent thought presentation. That introduction just rambled on as a run-on, without actually establishing any content in the paragraph. The question response is also out of format as it is not an extent response as instructed. The essay will fail based on TA deductions alone.  
  
The author is challenging an unspecified school of thought rather than offering a degree of disagreement. This is a prompt change from the original that will be given a failed score as it does not respond to the question as required. The overall response to the essay shows an overabundance of English vocabulary but a lack of writing instruction understanding. The length and content of the discussion becomes irrelevant at that point. The essay has already failed.