Yun-Rong, the advice above has some applicable points to the IELTS test. While it is similar to the TOEFL test, the presentation is different in the sense that the TOEFL test asks you to immediately present your opinion at the start of the presentation. You do not have this advantage in the IELTS test. That is because the IELTS test is stricter in its paragraph formatting. The test does not allow the exam taker to immediately present a discussion due to the paragraph development requirements.  
  
As you can see, your essay failed immediately in the Task Accuracy section because, instead of presenting a paraphrased paragraph, you decided to discuss the topic instead. In the IELTS test, the opening paragraph should represent the following:  
  
1. An accurate restatement of the topic  
2. The discussion reasons presented  
3. The discussion format instruction  
  
The basic paragraph format is normally 3-5 sentences, regardless of whether it is an opening statement, body of paragraph, or concluding presentation. Based upon the information in the opening paraphrase, you are looking at a minimum of 3 sentences. If you want to score well in the body of paragraphs, there are a number of things you have to ensure.  
  
In the body of paragraphs, make sure that you do not exceed the 5 sentence maximum presentation using one idea per paragraph as a topic, give a maximum of 2 supporting explanations in relation to the topic, then an example, close with a transition sentence into the next paragraph.  
  
When you are asked : *Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantage?* you need to pick one side to discuss in the essay instead of both. The instruction is clear, either it is advantageous or it is not. You cannot discuss both in the essay. All of the body paragraphs need to support only one side of the discussion as you believe it to be.  
  
Now, the reason that your essay will not pass the test is because you discussed only one side, which would have been acceptable, if you had done the discussion in the manner I instructed. Instead, you only focused on primary school, completely neglecting the secondary school point of view. Both points of view still need to be presented in the essay. If you had accurately discussed the opening paragraph, in a manner that allowed you to outline the discussion, you would have had a more concrete essay presentation. An example of a properly outlined opening statement is as follows:  
  
*Educational experts have been considering the proper age for youngsters to start training in the use of a different language other than their own. Some believe that this should be done as early as primary school while others offer the thought that perhaps secondary school learning would be best. The most common belief is that language learning should be started in primary school. I am of the opinion that learning the new language in primary school has more advantages than disadvantages. I shall present the reasons for my belief in the following paragraphs.*  
  
Then you could have kicked off the discussion with:  
  
*In my opinion, early exposure to foreign language benefits children economically and culturally in the future...*  
  
After which you could have said:  
  
*Those who oppose the idea believe that...  
  
While those that support the idea indicate...  
  
In the end, the reasons why....*  
  
These would have comprised a better formatted, outlined, and discussed essay on the topic.