dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
The summary should indicate the number of continents listed. It would be better if only a single trend is mentioned based on the years indicated. If 3 continents are mentioned in that section, then the last 3 must be mentioned to complete the summary listing.  
  
The first sentence of the second paragraph does not indicate an understandable meaning. This confusing sentence will pose significant c + C and GRA deductions for the exam taker as if leaves the reader confused with regards to the sentence meaning.  
  
The essay does not reflect a complete analysis as the 2 reporting paragraphs covers only 3 of the 6 indicated continents. This paper is only partially complete in teems of data analysis and presentation.
***Title:  
Some people say that individuals who make a lot of money are most successful.  
Others think that those who contribute to society like scientists and teachers are most successful.***  
## Discuss both view and express your opinion

  
  
There are two schools of thought on the criteria of measuring success. Some consider wealthy individuals to be the most successful. While others believe that success belongs to people making positive social contributions. In my viewpoint, even though the former view can be true with regard to the situation, the latter is more reasonable and profound due to several reasons.  
  
On the one hand, there are reasons why people believe that high incomers gain the most success. First, it is an irrefutable fact that high - net worth individuals can afford a higher quality of life. They can enjoy a luxurious lifestyle with high-cost products such as jewelry, outfits, and vehicles. Second, there's no doubt that well-off people usually work in large companies in high positions. They can also run their own business. So as to procure this position, these people have a high level of ambitions and experience in their work field. Therefore they gain trust, respect, and large income on a monthly basis. This can be exemplified by many cases of executive leaders or successful start-up company owners.  
  
However, I am still fully convinced that the most everlasting legacies belong to less superficial and more profound contributions and sacrifices. In other words, the impact of people dedicating their lives to society's common good exists longer than material wealth. For instance, president Ho Chi Minh, whose name can be dearly referred to as "Uncle Ho", dedicated his whole life to the unity of Vietnam without considering his material possession. Moreover, people like teachers or doctors whose successful contributions to society are believed to be their deep knowledge. To be more specific, these people have to spend time and effort acquiring knowledge. From that, society's needs and their job requirements can be both satisfied. Without doubt, they cannot become affluent from devoting most of their time to community contribution. Yet their accomplishments in various fields often withstand the test of time.  
  
In conclusion, while the tremendous power of money can gain a privileged lifestyle, there's no doubt that true success lies in people who committed their lives to make the world a better place.
Although the writer delivered an acceptable paraphrase and personal opinion, the actual discussion format is incorrect and not prompt responsive. The discussion mistake stems from the way all the points of view come from the writer's opinion alone. The instruction format actually asks the writer to provide an explanation for each public point of view ( 2 paragraphs) using 3rd person group references, before the singular first person pronoun personal opinion.  
  
The essay is all about showing the examiner that the writer is capable of developing an analysis first, without bias (public opinions ) and then, with bias (personal opinion) which is one of the more commonly used college and masters research writing formats.
Can you help me with me essay?  
  
***Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school.***  
## Do the advantages of this outweighs the disadvantages?

  
  
There is no doubt that language plays a vital role in today's world. While some experts maintain that it is better to introduce a foreign language at primary school instead of secondary school, many people think that it will be more pressure for children. From my perspective, I believe that there are more drawbacks than benefits.  
  
There are clear advantages of learning a foreign language at an early age. Firstly, primary school students process a perfect age to approach a new language. Researchers have shown that from 5 to 15 years old is the period when children develop significantly in language ability. Also, it is linguistically proven that the younger the learner is, the more easily they can pick up correct pronunciation and intonation. For example, many schools in developed countries have encouraged their students to be bilingual by adding a foreign language to the study program. Secondly, starting early allows more time to accumulate knowledge. This is due to the earlier children start, the more time they have to expose to that language. They can learn a foreign language through a variety of means, including books, entertainment programs, music,...Therefore, it is easier for them to broaden vocabulary and knowledge on its culture.  
  
On the other hand, learning a new language can overwhelm children with too much subjects at school and put them under pressure. In this way, children might have less time to participate in some healthy activities they might need at their age due to the heavy loads of homework. Additionally, studying a foreign language at an early age can also cause confusion for children. This is because they are still countinue fulfulling their mother language. A clear illustration of this problem is that children can not express their notion clearly as well as suffer language disorder.  
  
In conclusion, approaching a new language during childhood may have some disadvantages such as pressure and language disorder. However, I believe that being able to learn a foreign language at a primary school would be a fantastic opportunity for long-term development.
The prompt restatement is inaccurate. It contains reasoning information that are not a partof the original prompt. Any personal opinions or discussions should be reflected either in the opinion sentence or thesis statement. The rewriting of the topic must remain true to the original without any personal influence.  
  
The writer must review how English punctuation marks are used. The writer will never find an instruction that will recommend the successive use of punctuation marks. Regardless of what punctuation marks are used, these may only be usedone at a time. The writer will receive heavy penalties for improper sentence structures due to faulty punctuation usage.  
  
Since the writer believes that there are more disadvantages to early foreign language learning, then 2 reasons proving it should be presented. Due to the essay presenting only one supporting reason, the essay becomes confusing to lead. The reader will question the true opinion of the writer, leading to a reduced score. The clarity of the writing is now faulty and cannot receive full scoring marks for TA, GRA, and C + C elements.  
  
As a reminder, if the instruction does not ask one to compare anything, a comparison discussion should not be used.
***Countries are becoming more similar because people are able to buy the same products.***  
## IS IT A POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT?

  
  
Thanks to globalization, many kinds of goods are no longer limited in some specific areas and become more accessible to people in other places. As a result, there is an increase in the similarity among nations. Personally, I think that the benefits of this trend are more significant than the drawback.  
  
The main disadvantage of this trend is the loss of national uniqueness among countries. For example, in many Asian countries, it is true that fast food is predominantly popular while traditional cuisine is losing its popularity among local people. Similarly, in every big city, most buildings are designed in the Western-style and it is a rare sight to find traditional construction. In other words, architecture with cultural values is becoming less common and important.  
  
However, I would argue that this is a beneficial development for several reasons. With countries becoming more similar, there is no doubt that the gap between poor and rich nations would be narrowed. Plus, the fact that people now can have access to products that were once unavailable in their areas means that there is a boost in international trading. This not only has a positive impact on the global economy but also promotes cultural exchange. As a result of more cultural similarities and less financial differences, it is possible that the number of conflicts among countries would be reduced greatly.  
  
In conclusion, though the increasing similarity among nations can lead to the loss of cultural uniqueness, I believe that this trend itself is positive.
Scoring considerations for essays that merely meet the word requirement does not help the exam-taker to maximize his scoring potential based on the individual and overall scoring requirements. It is advisable that test takers aim to write within 275-300 words to allow the student to earn maximum scoring possibilities based on wbic requirements.  
  
The writer mentions globalization in the paragraph restatement. The original topic makes no mention of this. The examiner will view that statement as a topic deviation, affecting the TA score negatively. The writer must never include unsupported information in the rephrasing because of this. A mere 2 sentence paraphrase that does not alter the original information would have far more beneficial to that section in terms of scoring.  
  
The original question is reflective of a single opinion essay. The miter must not justify the point of view he does not support as scores are only applied relevant to its support of the given opinion. The current reasoning presentation fails to meet the coherence and cohesiveness requirements. In addition, the Task accuracy is affected negatively as the opposing opinion discussions create a problem with regards to opinion clarity. The writer now appears to support both ideas, even as he presented a different thesis topic in the introduction paragraph.  
  
The writer cannot convince the reader that his opinion statement is correct and believable because he cannot provide 2 supporting reasons for his point of view. More familiarity with correct reasoning formats are required for the writers improvement.
***Some people believe that a country will benefit greatly if students study abroad***  
## Do what extent do you agree or disagree ?

  
  
Studying overseas is one of the greatest dreams that many students have had. Some people argue that students nations would be beneficial if their citizens study abroad. I completely agree with this statement, because overseas students could make their nations wealthy with their new knowledge, and somewhat improve the education standard.  
  
On the one hand, students countries might get benefits from their citizens by enhancing produce methods, technology, which was the biggest struggle in developing countries, resulting in more productive industries. This could make the nation more wealthy, or at least, take them out of outdated methods in producing. For example, in my country, abroad students have improved many aspects of society, from producing to sealing, entertainment. New measures in agriculture, such as new breeds of rice have been introduced by those experts who studied abroad, which have enriched the yields, leading to lower poor rates.  
  
On the other hand, pupils who experienced an overseas graduate can be a drive to encourage their local education standard. The high salary and admiration have given to them have reinforced the local children to learn harder and harder, which has changed a lot of education basis. In my country, for instance, a host of students have been inspired by those predecessors, who have a better life after trying hard to study in another country. This can lead to better-skilled Labor generations, which also lead to a wealthier community.  
  
In conclusion, I completely agree that sending students overseas could be a beneficial way to encourage the economy and the education
The first sentence makes reference to the writer's personal opinion. It is not a point of view indicated in the original prompt. It is not going to recieve a score due to irrelevance to the original discussion presentation. The student knew to use both reasons in seperate supporting paragraphs.  
  
The problem, is the use of comparison reference phrases to introduce each paragraph. Reference phrases that indicated opposing points (on the one hand/on the other hand.) which led to a slight confusion while reading the text. Such errors will result in GRA and C + C deductions due to confusion applied to the reader. To avoid such deductions, topic sentences must be used to connectedly introduce the paragraph topics.  
  
The actual reasons are well explained and properly supported by valid examples. The writer shows a clear understanding of the topic but has some difficulty in using proper reference words. This is a good effort on the part of the writer. Further excercises should develop the writer's skills in the future.
## education and vocational training for prisoners

  
  
There's a controversial opinion that education and training will positively influence the criminals during their rehabilitation path rather than being imprisoned. From my viewpoint, prison is just an instant solution while these other two methods may actively change their attitudes and release the financial burden of the whole society.  
  
Being isolated under strict supervision may trigger anger and anti-social attitudes. Nowadays, most countries around the world using prison as a special place to separate people who were accused of committing crimes from society for a specific time. This method is considered immediately effective by providing a sense of being safe for other people. However, it makes prisoners feel cornered in the desperation of having no chance to come back to normal life. Therefore, the inside anger will keep growing until they are legally released and burst out into criminal activities again.  
  
In contrast, education and vocational training bring long-term beneficial effects to both the prisoners themselves and society. Most criminals were born and brought up in poor conditions without the chance to access the education system. Being educated can help them perceive what is right and wrong more properly, as well as increase their understanding of laws. By then, there will be a change in their attitudes towards social vices and crimes. Besides, job training gives criminals more chances to rehabilitate, get employed to earn their livings. With fewer prisoners, the financial burden placed on the government for maintaining this punishment system will decrease. Instead, they can increase the investment in other essential areas such as social welfare, public health, etc.  
  
With the increase of criminal rates, the resolution to deal with this group of people is gaining more public attention. However, the government should consider applying education and vocational training rather than focus on the short-term effects of imprisonment.
The writer has provided a relevant restatement and reasoning paragraph foundation. However, he has not given a response to the opinion question, "to what extent do you agree or disagree? " While the response is "implied " overall in the essay, a clear TA score cannot be applied as the writer failed to provide the correct opinion response format prior to the reasoning foundation. The essay TA score will suffer due to this slight oversight. The first paragraph carries heavy scoring requirements that the writer must always be aware of. In this instance, he failed to double check for prompt responsiveness.  
  
As this is not a comparative essay, finding something positive to say about the opposing view is unnecessary. The scores are only applied to supporting paragraphs. The writer at this point, will receive a score for the second paragraph. This will be based on an under- explained line of reasoning and way cause a failing score as other deductions are applied per section.  
  
The reasoning paragraphs should have discussed the following topics in one paragraph each:  
- Benefits of education  
- Benefits of vocational training  
  
Properly developed and discussed, these 2 topics would have boosted the TA and C + C scores for a better final grade.
space exploration versus people problems on the earth  
  
*Question: Some governments spend a lot of money on exploring space. Some feel that this investment is justified while others think that money should be spent on public services like healthcare and education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.* (about 250 words).  
  
In the age of exploration, billions of dollars have been spent on space travels, services and equipment. However, many people claim that government is just squandering and they better invest in public services such as healthcare and education. In my opinion, improving citizens' life should be given more prioprity.  
  
On the one hand, people advocate for budget on public services because most of it comes from citizens' income and their life quality is great of importance. Inhabitants want to receive good healthcare system where they can obtain modern and effective treatment services. Besides, a thriving country comes form an outstanding education. If they invest more in constructing schools or developing future labor resources, the literacy will be increased. Therefore, the awareness of people are enhanced and the country is likely to develop at faster speed.  
  
On the other hand, space exploration assists people to keep track with information and contemporary world. Since the end of World War 2, every powerful country have tried their best to come first in term of space discovery or telegraph technology. As a result, budget on these areas is a necessary. However, it can not come before people's welfare. The major responsibility of a government is obviously facilitating it's inhabitants' life. Once this task is completed, then can it think about the another.  
  
In conclusion, space exploration takes up billions of dollars due to the competition of powerful countries, while budget on improving people's welfare is believed to lead to nation's growth. I suppose budget on space exploration comes after public services because of government's responsibility.
The essay was off to a good start, missing out only on the proper discussion format. As the instruction states that a comparative discussion of the 2 public opinions be presented prior to the personal opinion, the indicative discussion paragraphs covers 3 point of view specific paragraphs.  
  
Based on the given presentation, 2 out of 3 paragraphs are discussed, the 2 public opinions are well discussed but the personal point of wilier is missing. Integrating a personal opinion in the conclusion will cause this essay to fail as no format responsive concluding summary has been provided. The full essay does not meet the discussion requirements as stipulated. The personal opinion is considered missing as it must always be a paragraph presentation before the summary conclusion.
## IELTS writting task 1 - charts data

  
  
The first chart describes how Australians use energy in an average household while the second chart illustrates the greenhouse gas wastes which using this energy lead to.  
  
Overall, the trend of using energy to heat is the most popular in this Australian household. It is clear that, the water heating discharges the most gas emissions.  
  
The amount of energy which is used for heating is the highest figure, at 42%. While the energy for water heating ranks the second, with 12% lower than that of heating. By contrary, people use only 2% energy in order to cool.  
  
It is noticable that, the majority of gas emissions results from water heating which account for 32%. At the same time, cooling discharges 3% gar emission
The image is not properly identified in the summary paragraphs. A chart is a general image reference. It is not a complete image identifier. The writer must indicate the type of chart presented (e.g. pie chart) to help create the mental image for the reader. That presentation should also be at least 3 sentences long.  
  
In reference to the sentence presentations, having witten only 123 words indicates a lack of proper image analysis and explanation development. The writer shows an unfamiliarity with task 1 writing guidelines.  
  
A task 1 essay of less than 150 words guarantees a failing essay score. The paper has not met the overall minimum scoring standards to achieve even a baseline passing score. More analytical writing is required.
## time spent by UK citizens on exercising

  
  
The table compares the average amount of time per day spent by UK men and women on different daily activities.  
It is clear that people who live in the UK spent more time sleeping than in any activities. Also, there are significant differences in the time the women and men spent on employment/study and housework.  
  
On average, men and women spent 8 hours to sleep per day. Leisure is the second largest in the proportion of their time. Men spent 5 hours and 25 minutes do various activities leisure, like watching TV or playing sports, while the women spent 4 hours and 53 minutes for their leisure time. It is noticeable that the average time men working and studying more 79 minutes than women.  
  
In contrast, women spent more than 79 minutes do housework than men, and they spent twice as much time childcare as men.
The first and foremost reason this essay will fail is the wifer wrote only 1461 150 words. The word count deduction is applied immediately, even before othe scoring deductions are applied. This means that the essay starts with a reduced or failing score right from the start. The writer must keep the s score at 100% by writing at least 150 words at the very start. Otherwise, the essay would have failed even before it was fully scored.  
  
The summary overview fails to list a summary of the activities involved along with how these activities are presented in the image (measurement identifier). The comparison paragraphs need to have uniform sentence presentations. No paragraph should be less than 3 sentences, but no more than 5 either.
## vaccination in the uk and whooping cough

  
  
The line graph illustrates the changes of the incidence of whooping cough before and after having vaccination from 1940 to 2010 in the United Kingdom.  
  
It is clear that before taking vaccine, the number of reported cases of whooping cough were relatively higher with almost 180,000 cases at most. After the policy of vaccination declared, cases dramatically dropped under 100,000 in 1957. Moreover, with the rate of taking vaccine got higher, the reported cases reached lower figure.  
  
From 1940 to 1956, before having vaccination, the cases of whooping cough were hard to control, it saw a significant increase in 1940 then dropped to under 100,000 between 1943 and 1950, and went up again to above 170,000 in 1955. On the other hand, after having vaccine, the disease was controlled, the number of cases was never above 65,000 anymore. Additionally, with high percentage of children got vaccinated, the disease was nearly gone by 2010.