dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
Essay topics:  
## Consumers are faced with increasing numbers of advertisements from competing companies.

  
***To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertisements? What measures can be taken to protect them?***  
  
As competition among companies about numerous advertisements has become further fiercer, consumers have been bombarded with them on a daily basis. In this essay, I will demonstrate the detrimental effects of these kinds of commercials before taking into consideration some practical solutions so as to mitigate this worse situation.  
  
To begin with, among various problems related to the drawbacks of advertisements from competing entrepreneurs, two major ones will be apparently analysed. In the first place, it is obvious that commercials have a tendency to make their clients buy goods and products impulsively which make a contribution to their budgets. As a matter of fact, people in the middle and low class have frequently attracted by advertisements on account of eye-catching ads and misleading words. To cite an example for the latter, a large quantity of food corporations use strategic marketing methods by putting various billboards, running online ads about promotions with attractive benefits during purchasing experience without providing them with enough condition to apply for their coupons. Additionally, potential risks related to the security of customer database has turned into one of the most alarming issues in this aspect. On almost social networking sites, consumers are likely to face up with the invasion of privacy just by their accidental click on junk links and as a consequence, their information could be leaked to the homepage of advertisers and brings about a great deal of disturbance by their sales service.  
  
Nevertheless, this situation can be eradicated by different practical measures that I will mention. In terms of individuals, residents may take some cautions in providing important personal information on online platform as well as raising self-awareness of the danger of cybercrime. In particular, users should minimize getting access to some alien links in order to prohibit viruses invading their gadgets. On the governmental level, authorities should enact stricter rights about the cyber security and control this serious phenomenon. Particular entrepreneurs should be forced to bear sole responsibilities for managing consumer database and governments give punishment as a civic role to the offender as a precaution with other circumstances to go on their illegal action.  
  
In conclusion, people who drown in advertisements may be lured into purchasing unnecessary things and experience the leakage of their personal database. However, the proposed steps should be taken to eradicate the influence of advertising.
The prompt restatement should carry an academic tone and should not be using slang English words such as "bombarded". While the interpretation is acceptable, it should be more educated and representative of proper academic learning next time. The writer has not provided a scorable opinion statement as he did not provide summarized topic responses to the questions but only question paraphrasing. These do not fulfill the clear opinion statement requirement of the paragraph. Only a partial prompt restatement score will be applied.  
  
Taking into consideration that the discussion restatement provided does not follow the original 2 questions, it is safe to say that the writer has completely altered the discussion targets. He cannot get a passing score for this essay as his discussion paragraphs are not suited to the provided writing instructions. An overall failing score will be given to this essay.
## the effectiveness of advertisement

  
  
Marketing and advertising are the backbones of the modern capitalist economy. This has led to a debate where one side thinks advertisements are greatly effective in influencing our purchases, while the other party believes that they have become redundant to an extent that they no longer attract our attention.  
  
On the one hand, some believe that advertising are enormously successful at motivating us to buy what they advertise. They explain this by saying that if marketing wasn't successful, large international companies would not spend billions of dollars on it every year. Apple, for example, spent around 33% of its budget last year on advertising. Thus, such huge and successful corporations would not waste this much money if it wasn't effective.  
  
On the other hand, there are others 3ho believe advertisements to have become boring and no longer affect us. They further their point by stating that adverts have become so abundant that they have lost their creative touch, which has caused them to become repetitive and uninteresting. Due to this, they no longer influence our purchasing habits. A famous company called Oppo, for instance has completely removed marketing department, stating that it is a waste of money and the less they spend on ads, the more they can spend on meaningful things such as quality improvement.  
  
Personally, I think advertising is certainly effective even if it has become common. This is because ads work on our thoughts on a subconscious level and influence our choices without us knowing. In other words, bill boards and TV ads, which we see everyday, are implanted into our memory and unknowingly become more familiar to us. A study done in 2016 stated that we are likely to buy a brand that is advertised even if its of a lower quality, plainly due to the fact that its more familiar. Hence, marketing affects us even if we don't know it.  
  
In conclusion, although some believe advertisement are very successful at what they are built for, other think they have become boring and too common. Personally, I believe that despite becoming significantly abundant they still are extremely effective.
The prompt restatement should never include a personal opinion or statement of fact that is not part of the ouginal ffocus. Inclusions such as the first sentence in the first paragraph will result in accuracy deductions. Such declarations are only acceptable as a part of the establishing sentence of the writers opinion. The incorrect sentence placement had a negative effect on the sectional score. That said, a proper presentation of the relevant topics and writers opinion are present which offset the applied deductions a bit.  
  
A study done in 2016  
By whom ? Refer to a source since you are allowed to makeup information anyway. The lack of reference weakened the strength of the explanation.  
  
The writer has a spelling error present that should have been seen and corrected during the editing process. It shows a lack of interest in the quality of writing on the part of the writer. His collective existing mistakes show that he does not care about point deductions that may affect his final score.
## who should take the charge of helping kids having healthy lifestyle?

  
  
In these days and ages, human society is developing positively in variety aspects of life such as technology or living standards; however, some negative problems also exist. One of that is more children have an unhealthy way of living. I believe both parents and schools have responsibility to solve this issue.  
  
On the one hand, children today have opportunities to get access to technology devices like computers or smartphones at really young age. They often use it for watching video on Youtube, surfing the Internet or playing video games. Besides, all these activities are addictive to children, they can spend extended hours in front of screen that lead to several health problems such as eye strain and bad posture. In other words, they have an inactive lifestyle. Sadly, these problems mainly come from parents who do not impose strict rules on children and not carefully supervisor them. For example, in Vietnam most parents give smartphones to their children when they want to feed them.  
  
On the other hand, schools are apart reason of this issue. Now, education system too focus on teaching academic subjects and children's score. Therefore, schools are lack of physical activities that cause unhealthy lifestyle at children. In addtion, I suppose that who created undesirable content or violent video games should be blamed as well because of damaging children's mental health.  
  
In conclusion, it seems that everyone is should take charge of helping kids having better way of life. If parents combine with schools in this, we might have a dynamic generation for developing society.
The prompt restatement does not accurately seem up the original discussion points. The mistake in the interpretation was caused by the writer expressing a personal opinion that is not aligned with the prompt. His statement totally changed the discussion topic. That is also the reason why he did not present an extent response as required. The essay has failed to meet the task requirements early on due to these prompt deviations.  
  
The essay will receive non-passing marks in terms of accuracy while only partial scores can be applied to the remaining sections due to a non-compliant discussion presentation. Since the discussion is relevant only to the topic created by the writer, the essay cannot receive a passing score.
## coffee and tea buying and drinking

  
  
The chart below gives information about the results of a survey about the proportion of people in five different cities in Australia who consumed coffee and tea in the last four weeks.  
  
Overall, people in all cities preferred going to cafe for drinks like instant or fresh coffee, except for Adelaide where buying instant coffee was the most  
  
common.  
The routine of buying drinks was a bit different in each city. Instant coffee was more consumed than fresh coffee. The gap was high between these three cities Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart, which was about or more than 15%. In Melbourne and  
  
Sydney, the gap was a bit narrow, which was from 2% to 7% percent.  
On the other hand, Sydney, Melbourne and Hobart had the highest percentage of people going coffee shop. Brisbane, Which was also on top, but much lower, just about 55%. Although the habit ranked second between cities, Adelaide - the figure  
  
was still merely on top.
It is important for reporting purposes that the writer treat this as an actual analysis. An accurate analysis never indicates the image position as it is irrelevant to the summary or report presentation. Only the summarized data must be in focus. The first paragraph does not meet the academic paragraph format requirement. It will lose GRA points as it is a run on presentation rather than individual idea presentations that represent scannable and highlightable data. It is a failed summary attempt.  
  
The writer also gives a general identifier for the image rather than a specific image type. The writer is showing that he has not familiarized himself with the assorted specific image presentations. What sort of graph is this? The non-specific identifier will lower the accuracy scores. Analysis requires accurate specifics for reader information and consideration.  
  
A proper enumeration of the involved cities as apart of the overview was missed by the writer, further weakening the validity of the claims made in the report. The writer has not made an effort to present a strong reporting task in this presentation. He has missed several scoring considerations in the?presentation.
## problems of overpopulation

  
  
It is clear that many people migrate to metropolia to find a better life, which leads to detrimental issues for society. There are a number of reasons behind this phenomenon, but measures can be taken by governments to improve the situation.  
  
As the overpopulation issue is committing more harmful to society, several related problems can be anticipated. The main issue is that the environment bears detrimental effects from overpopulation, which leads to a deficit of food, water, space for living and contamination in big cities. For example, overpopulation results in increasing waste households being discharged into the environment, causing contamination of air and water sources. Another problem is the governments have suffered harmful effects on public services, infrastructure transportation and increased unemployment rate. For example, serious traffic congestion, medical services overload and employees without formal academic qualifications who can be paid a low salary, so they can not afford the cost of living in cities.  
  
Since these issues are serious, the government should immediately take steps to address these problems. The first solution would be to move industrial production factories to rural areas to create more job opportunities for residents. For example, governments should subsidize enterprises to encourage them to build more factories in provincial towns rather than focusing on the heart of the city. The second would be to improve the public services like medical facilities and infrastructure transport, reducing the number of people going to the city for treatment and commuting with residents easily.  
  
In conclusion, it is clear that there are various reasons for overpopulation in cities being harmful to society and the environment. This is a joint effort by governments such as improve public services and make more jobs for employees, which can hopefully address these problems.
There are 2 direct questions that are to be the basis of the writer's opinion. The instruction is to provide an overview of 2 related problems and accompanying solutions. The introduction of these answers in the short form help to increase the clarity of the establishing response as it sets the tone for the succeeding discussion paragraphs. The first paragraph is incomplete without it  
  
While the problems presented have a direct relationship, the writer did not successfully connect the 2 topics in the paragraph. There is a lack of cohesive device and transition word/phrase usage in the presentation. The missing links prove to be a scoring problem as it affects the coherence of the paragraph. A connecting reference is required to establish the topic discussion chain in relation to the problems to prove the seriousness of the problem.  
  
With regards to possible solutions, the presentation is also under explained. The examples presented must specifically indicate what or which of the 2 problems it should solve. The 2nd solution could also use more development in terms of how it supports the first solution. The problem is again cohesive and transition device usage.  
  
A complete summary conclusion is also presented. The problems related to overpopulation should have been restated to represent the fist discussion basis. There is no logic to the solutions recap if the problems these solve are not presented as the establishing topics.
**SOME PEOPLE SAY THAT THE BEST WAY TO IMPROVE PUBLIC HEALTH IS BY INCREASING THE NUMBER OF SPORTS FACILITIES. OTHERS, HOWEVER, SAY THAT THIS WOULD HAVE LITTLE EFFECT ON PUBLIC HEALTH AND THAT OTHER MEASURES ARE REQUIRED.  
  
WHAT IS YOUR OPINION? SUPPORT YOUR STAND WITH RELEVANT EXAMPLES.**  
  
Some people propose that building more sports facilities would be the best solution to improve the community's health. Meanwhile, others say that sports arenas are not the main factor to achieve better public health without other initiatives. In my view, gyms and stadiums are not as important as a conjunction of various methods.  
  
On the left, improving sporting infrastructure could motivate people to do more exercise. People can gather together at the same place for not only physical exercise but also to make friends and talk to them to ease pressure on themselves. This helps them enhance their physical and mental health. Weight training in a wide space mostly brings higher effectiveness than at home. For instance, according to WHO statistics, the obesity rate in the US has fallen by 20% as a result of states' investing more funds to build sports centers across the country. However, the advancement in public health needs other steps.  
  
On the right hand, the government needs to ensure food apply. Even more, nutrition education should be popular with people, raising public knowledge of the health benefits of a well-balanced diet, and frequent exercise. For example, the media is emphasizing nutrition education initiatives in schools and colleges resulting in a 25 percent reduction in obesity among teenagers in Japan. Consequently, different ways all bring advantages to our community, but not just any of them.  
  
To summarize, adding sporting facilities is not the best effective strategy for our public health, various solutions need to be implemented for our better lives.
The first paragraph shows that the writer is unfamiliar with English word meaning. His misunderstanding of an arena representation and what activities are undertaken at stadiumA forced word usage errors in the paragraph. The second sentence of theparagraph is also a misrepresentation of the alternate discussion point from the orginal. The prompt restatement is not a correct interpretation of the original discussion. As for his personal opinion, it is clear enough when one considers the simple reasoning summary he included at the end. I am just not sure if that will be enough to earn him a passing preliminary base score.  
  
There is no connected discussion presentation in the 2 reasoning paragraphs. The lack of a clear relationship between the reason why less sports facilities are needed in favor of a healthier diet is not clearly explained, The supporting evidence is lacking and weak leading to an underdeveloped reasoning discussion, How does food education and diet relate to healthier people without more exercise facilities in place? That is the connecting idea that would have completed the 2 discussion paragraphs.  
  
The discussion presented lost sight of the central discussion which is whether more sports facilities are needed or not. Note that in the food discussion, a mention of exercise was still made but not properly developed in connection with food education. This was a clear discussion oversight in the presentation. It is not about strategizing but about the effect of building more sports activities venues to improve public health. There is a slight topic deviation here.  
  
Strive for a more complete summary conclusion. Always meet the 40 word, 2 sentence requirement to achieve a higher task score.
## the changing rates of crime in the inner city

  
  
The line chart illustrates the changes of incident number happened in three areas of crime in Newport city center including burglary, car theft and robbery between 2003 and 2012.  
  
Overall, the number of incidents made by car thieves and robbers increased slightly while at the same time, the figure for burglary incident dropped considerably. all of them have some fluctuations. Although rate of burglary incident is highest initially, at the end of period, the number of car theft incident outraced the others.  
  
With regard to the number of car theft incident, it began at about 2800 incidents at the first year before increasing slightly to around 2900 incidents in the next year, and hitting a lower-point of about 2000 incidents in 2006. Then, it witnessed a inconsiderable spike before falling again to around 2001 in 2008 and claimed back gradually to over 2500 in 2010 and reach a peak at about 2750 at the of period. Likewise, about 700 robbery incidents were recorded in the first year and the number increased extremely to approximately 900 incidents in 2005 before falling gradually to about 600 incidents in 2007 and 500 in 2008. In the rest of period, the robbery incident number rose significantly to around 750 in 2010 and the last number recorded was about 525 incidents in 2012.  
  
On the other hand, initially burglary incidents number recorded at almost 3500 in 2003 and reached a peak at around 3750 in the next year. However, the figure dropped gradually and hit a lower-point of about 1200 incidents in 2008. From 2009 to 2011, the number of incidents only fluctuated below 1500 before falling to about 1850 incidents in 2012.  
  
*
An "incident" is too general a reference that does not accurately identify the basis of the analysis. The please that should have been used is "crime incidents" in reference to the acts involved. The writer mistakenly used a ven-on sentence in the summary paragraph. He tried to connect 2 ideas in one sentence. These should have been stand alone sentence presentations as it refers to different topics, though connected to a main discussion point.  
  
The writer shows a tendency to be redundant ashe continously writes "incident" with a very slight variation with "incidents'. Aside from being a grammatical issue, it also reduces the LR score as he proves to only be able to write using memorized words. He shows a degree of limited vocabulary that prevents him from presenting a better sentence structure. A spike in measurement is not inconsiderable.This incorrect word usage, based on word meaning in relation to idea presentation will further lower the LR score as he proves to understand English word meaning. These are but 2 references to the consistent word usage problem in the analysis essay.  
  
He has a problem with sentence structuring as well. He failed to capitalize the first word of a sentence and did not even realize and correct the error. More practice and a conscious effort to proofread his work prior to submission is needed. He should focus on word usage accuracy and correct grammar instead of just writing a long analysis. His vocabulary needs to be accurate at all times.
## **Young people who commit crimes should be treated the same way as adults**

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*To what extent do you agree or disagree?*  
  
These days, the rising rate of juvenile crimes has become an alarming practical for the public. It is argued that the young who break the laws should be punished equitably as adults. From my perspective, I partly agree with this view and this essay will hold the reasons for my view.  
  
On the one hand, juvenile delinquents should receive the same punishments as mature lawbreakers. If youth crimes receive reduced sentence, they may not be aware of the seriousness of their action. In particular, youngsters think that the law cannot severely punish them because they are under 18 years old. Therefore, they can rely on this leniency to re-offend which lead to more severe consequences. Furthermore, if a teenager is tried in court as an adult, others will consider the results which they have to face when they take part in unlawful acts. Thus, this contributes to decline in juvenile offender rate.  
  
On the other hand, I am inclined to think that the young and adults should be convicted in different forms. First, in this period, adolescents' mental capacity is not full developed in structure and functions. They could be impacted by many negative external factors such as Internet, environment and even family resulting in an increase in criminal trends. In addition, they are more likely to suffer from permanent emotional damage if punished in ways that adults are. Thence, this greatly affects their ability to renovate and restore successfully. Instead of being severe sentences, the youth should be placed in appropriate rehabilitation and re-education programs.  
  
To conclude, the youth have to take the punishments for what they did. However, I think the youth should be judged differently from adults.