dim/essayforum_raw_writing_10k huggingface dataset:
At present, although newspapers are believed to be the optimal methods to receive information, I still hold a contrary opinion because other types of media have become increasingly dominant.  
  
It is undeniable that newspapers provide great educational value and help readers to deepen their knowledge for them to get useful ideas and make progress in working or studying. Besides, reading them is a good habit which is both entertaining and stress-relieving. For instance, newspapers carry general information about numerous areas of life such as politics, entertainment, business or a country's economic situation...which are extremely beneficial to students and make them become active learners so that they could study more effectively thanks to the huge storages of the information offered by the articles. Besides that, someone reading more tends to have lower stress levels according to scientific studies  
  
On the other hand, a lot of people prefer social media such as the internet and television which are gaining popularity in recent time. Internet is available in every corner of the world. They make it possible for people to get updated with current affairs and on-going social issues within a second. Moreover, the news on the Internet is more diverse and interesting in comparison to printed papers. To illustrate, people can read the news just by a click on a smartphone instead of reading conventional newspapers and the information on the Internet contains a variety of vivid pictures and sounds so people might not find it tedious when reading.  
  
In conclusion, I think that newspapers would not continue to play the most crucial role due to the development of other media, which are taking over the position of them.
## cybercrime and addiction

  
  
**The Internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the Internet? What are the best ways to solve them?**  
  
Today, it is true that Internet reverberation plays a pivotal role in the revivification of the modern world, which has considerably changed the way people access to information. Although this phenomenon has several positive ramifications, the Internet also creates unprecedented problems that plague and beleaguer people around the world. This essay will look at the most pressing ones among them and will propose solutions to alleviate these issues.  
  
One of the main problems caused by the Internet is perhaps a recrudescence of cybercrime that takes place everywhere. This is because the number of internet users continues to grow steadily, leading to the fact that more personal properties such as electronic currency or banking information are likely to be stored online. As a result, malicious people with bottomless cupidity will try to appropriate others' fortune, thus engendering an enormous increment in cyber-criminals acts such as stealing bank accounts and network hacking. For example, online banking thefts use many techniques to gain access to victim's banking information, the most common of which is to send phishing emails. To convince victims to enter personal data, those emails will require users to fulfill information to their account suspended, thereby invading people's privacy. Another worrying problem is that users can easily become Internet addicts. Since internet has been a reservoir of alluring resources, fragile people would tend to succumb to temptation, thus negatively affecting their well-being and creating physical as well as metal illnesses.  
  
However, there are effective measures to ameliorate these issues. Firstly, the government should impose severer punishments for individuals who commit barbaric cyber-crimes; furthermore, these ought to be applied on a massive scale to promote its efficiency. In this way, the governments not only show their preoccupation of easing the problem of cyber-crime but also encourage their citizens to have remonstrative attitude towards this issue. Secondly, people should exercise basic precautions that help protect themselves against cyber-crime such as using strong password or keeping their software updated. In terms of internet addicts, they should participate in addiction recovery program, and more importantly, they need to engage in outdoor activities that help them keep a balance life. Only by taking these steps in synchronization, problems with the Internet can properly be tackled.  
  
In conclusion, cybercrime and addiction are two most serious threats associated with the Internet. To counter these problems, the government should have more rigorous regulations, and citizens should be trained to be cautious of online risks as well as encouraged to take part in activities to have a healthy life.  
  
I hope to see your feedbacks!  
Thank you very much
@Thangnguyen315  
Hi. It's great to see you here again! I'm here to give you feedback on this written work. I'll do my best on that.  
  
Generally, your writing is quite decent. Your grasp of the language is satisfying, considering that you're able to elaborate with such distinction throughout. I would only recommend trying to incorporate a more integrative approach through balancing out your heavy sentences with simpler ones. Take a look at your first paragraph. The essay needs a bit of work because of the heaviness of the words. This makes your work a bit tough on the eyes. Try simplifying a few lines to add more dyanism.  
  
Your second paragraph is also a bit too lengthy. I suggest trimming this down a bit more.
## excessive gaming is harmful

  
  
It is believed that middle school students had not better waste time playing computer games. There are tons of undeniable reasons for this. First of all, playing computer games have negative effects on our health, looking at the PC's screen many hours may hurt our eyes a lot. Moreover, staying at home make us sick and tired because of not having enough oxygen for breathing. In addition, spending too much time on these things, game-players can't do sports activities which is very important, especially for students who at puberty. That's the reason we see most gamers are obese. Last but not least, playing too much computer games will make you forget your friends. While they are having fun together, you're just "having fun" in a virtual world. In conclusion, playing computer games may make us relaxed but there are more harmful things that we should know about it.
... students are ~~had not~~ better **not to** waste **their** time ...  
There are ~~tons of~~  **some** undeniable reasons ~~for this~~ **of it**.  
... computer game~~s~~ ~~have~~ **has** negative ~~effects~~ **impacts** ~~on~~ **to** our health.  
**For instance,** looking at the PC's screen **in** many hours ...  
... make**s** us sick and ~~tired~~ **limp** because ~~of~~ **we do** not have~~ng~~ enough ...
## study abroad phenomenon

  
  
In this globalization era, it can be seen that students choosing to access the education in foreign countries are on the increase. Nevertheless, there are two sides for this case because its benefits and disadvantages toward students.  
  
The drawbacks of studying in different countries cause the stress for pupils. Living abroad means they have to manage their life by themselves; doing housework, homework, lunch, ... without the care of parents. Hence, they will be suffer from the feeling of homesickness, isolation, depression, and even anxiety disorders. Some learner, in a new horizon, they can not demolish linguistic barriers, which leads to a lack of communication with others, they alienate themselves from the communities. Another problem is high costs of living in the modern cities is never easy with people who living in developed countries. Students need to pay for renting accommodation, transportation and so on.  
  
In the other hand, studying in a prestigious university can open up a new horizon of a rich variety of opportunities for students to access a better curriculum. Therefore, when they come back to their own countries or staying abroad, they will be absolutely competitive with others because of their enormous knowledge. Other reasons why people always want to study overseas are the chances to challenge themselves with a new language and can have beautiful friendships with native people, which will help them in the future. Some of the pupils who living abroad do not need to cope with the high costs of life due to the scholarships; they also can do extra work to earn more money to support their study. After all, when students live independently, they can learn to be master sophisticated social and to be mature with a large of experiences collecting through the duration out of home.  
  
In my perspective, studying in different countries is a perfect occasion for us to challenge ourselves, and find out what we really are, who we want to become. That is the reason why i am a solid advocate of the idea studying abroad has more benefits than drawbacks.
*The qualities and skills that a person requires to become successful in today's world cannot be learned at a university or other academic institutions.  
  
To what extent do you agree or disagree?*  
  
## which skills contribute to success?

  
  
Achievers need numerous qualities and skills being accepted as a triumphant. Although proponents are of the notion that all traits could not be acquired at school or college, some are grasped from other experience. I vehemently espouse with the above statement on the ground of that; an individual enhanced some skills in learning centers, others in their job rest they grab from their extensive life experience. Let us discuss it in detail in the subsequent paragraphs.  
  
First and foremost, though a person needs some professional knowledge and mandate to have an equivalent degree to grab top-ranked jobs in this competitive life, for becoming victorious; ones should pick-up additional skills such as self-confidence, optimism and passion. To elaborate, all special abilities to become cup-winning can have through motivational stories, self-realization and patience. As school provides equal knowledge and teaching to every student, but few of them achieve success only by sweeping their skills to become superior. For instance, Dr Sigmund Freud, an eminent psychologist of human behaviour and cognitive skills, stated that to become cup-winning ones should require extra features.  
  
Additionally, another part of society reckons that they are successful after acquiring top positions in multinational companies with qualified academics, which is not the case. To clarify, when people become affluent, they are in a misconception of being successful, in the later stage they feel frustrated and incompleteness because of an individual need more money and that more is never enough. Thus, the actual meaning is self- satisfaction need to do something meaningful. When people give others without expecting anything in return, these skills can be pick up with broad life experience. These peculiarities cannot be provided by another educational place on self-realization and self-satisfaction. To illustrate,  
  
Finally, although people gain diverse skills while doing their studies, still they count as fresher on jobs in the absence of professional experience. To explain, if someone wants to become successful, they need not only academic skills but also require official skills such as problem-solving skills besides this ability to accept and learn from criticism. Moreover, there are other types of people who make it big without going to college, those who took risks to achieve success and pursued their dreams. To cite an example, Michael Dell, the founder and CEO of Dell who dropped out of college at 19. He first started his computer company and expanded it with will-power, intellectual and cognitive skills.  
  
To encapsulate, it can be concluded that there are different skills to be a successful person we grab from various places in different segments of life, institutions are only one part of it, not the whole one.
## IELTS WRITING TASK 1 - map analysis

  
  
The maps illustrate how Meadowside village and Fonton, which is a neighboring town, have developed over three different time periods (1962, 1985 and the present).  
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.  
  
-------------------------------  
The pictures illustrate how Meadowside Village and its neighbouring town Fonton have developed since 1962.  
It is clear that significant changes have been made in terms of infrastructure, accommodation, and facilities in Meadowside and Fonton area during this period. Both two places expanded their area and subsequently merged into a larger sector.  
  
In 1962, there was only a small road through Meadowside and a railway in Fonton. However, since 1985, the road in Meadowside Village had been reconstructed into a highway, and another main road had been built to connect Meadowside and Fonton. Other additions in recent are the second railway through Fonton, which associate with a new station halfway between two places.  
  
Besides the physical structures mentioned above, by 1985, the new housing and facilities in Meadowside include a housing estate, which had been constructed in the west of the village, and a little close to it was leisure complex. There was also a superstore opposite the housing estate in southern direction. Currently, Meadowside has become a suburbs of Fonton and there are other constructions which have been built in the middle of this combined area. A hotel has been opened to the north of the station, while on the opposite of station to the south is a business park.  
  
*
@moon812  
Hi! You're new here so I welcome you to the forum. I hope you find this feedback helpful for your writing endeavors.  
  
Firstly, I heavily recommend that you create more concise and shorter sentences. Utterances should always be composed with precision, especially if you're working with a word count. Being more technically correct with your analysis is more important in these instances.  
  
I would also suggest making more structured content. Try to incorporate more pauses through the utilization of commas and other forms of punctuation. Observe the second paragraph's first sentence. It's quite too packed for an introductory line.  
  
Remember that consistency and precision are both critical for these essays.
## learning local history rather than world history

  
  
**It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?**  
  
Some people argue that it is important for children to study folk history rather than world history. I disagree with this view, because I think that both of them have equally significant value to help children develop their knowledge in historic domain.  
  
On the one hand, studying local history would help pupils know more about cultural tradition of their own countries. This will also provide an opportunity to advertise their image and resident to international friends, thereby attracting a lot of tourists to visit and explore. This also promotes development of tourism, creates more jobs for civilian, and contributes to government budgets. For instance, in international letter-writing competition for young people. Understanding national history can help Vietnamese pupils introduce to international friends about the anti-invader tradition from a thousand year ago, with many heroes and historical relics associated with it such as battle of Bach Dang river, Dien Bien Phu in the air or Cu Chi tunnels. This contributes to advertise the image of Vietnam in the eyes of international friends.  
  
On the other hand, learning world history would help students gain deeply more about outside world, traditions and customs of different countries. This give a beneficial condition for interchange and cultural exchange with international friends; therefore, people could be closer and easier to integrate. For example, currently, many universities have cultural exchange curriculums between other nations, so understanding history, culture, and people could help student approach and adapt easily to new environment.  
  
In conclusion, it seems to me that teaching domestic and international history together could fully equip for student all knowledge that help them in the long run.
... local history ~~would~~ helps pupils know ...  
  
This will also provide ...  
-->This will also make them capable of introducing their home countries to foreigners, thereby attracting more tourists to visit their countries.  
  
This also promotes development ...  
-->With the development of tourism, more jobs are created, and governments earn more money.  
  
-->For instance, the international ... people in Vietnam creates an opportunity to the world to introduce the anti-invader tradition ... associated with them such as ... To write the letter, students require a deep understanding of national history.  
  
-->... learning world history helps students know more about the world, including traditions and ...  
  
-->... many universities provide cultural exchange curriculums with other nations, ... help student adapt easily ...
@vulong79  
Hello there. Seeing as you are new here, I welcome you to the forum! I hope you find the feedback you see here to be helpful for your writing endeavors.  
  
On top of what has already been mentioned, I'll try to curate a more structural and meaning-based guidance on the essay to assist you.  
  
I think that the first paragraph can be improved if you focus more on prioritizing particular details of content. Taking a look at it, it appears to be quite messy how you just jumped into the first two perspectives in a snap. It would be better to have an introductory or supplementary line on top of it to build up your words a bit more.  
  
The second paragraph is also a bit too tensed. I would suggest dividing it into smaller chunks.
## IELTS 2: job satisfaction

  
  
*As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.  
  
What factors contribute to job satisfaction?  
  
How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?*  
  
We spend the majority of our lives working, as a result, job satisfaction is acting an important role of our self-esteem. In this essay, I am going to discuss the factors that lead to job satisfaction and how realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all of us.  
  
In my opinion, job satisfaction attributes to salary, position, a sense of accomplishment, and the balance between work and life. First, although money can't buy you everything, most of the time you will be happy after spending money. People tend to feel more satisfied on their job when they have higher salary. Second, a higher position in a company makes people feel honored and proud. Third, a sense of accomplishment on work makes people feel excited and keep working hard. Last, striking the balance between work and life is a goal for many people. Therefore, it is another factor that contributes to job satisfaction.  
  
Regarding to how realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction, I think that it is unrealistic because people usually have an ideal imagination in their minds. In this case, the expectation will be hard to achieve. However, we can always work harder and harder. With an ultimate goal, people will devote more effort and inspire their potential. For example, athletes sometimes set up harder achievements for themselves to push them perform over their limitations.  
  
In conclusion, salary, position, a sense of accomplishment, and the balance between work and life are the factors related to job satisfaction. Furthermore, the expectation of job satisfaction is unrealistic to most people, but we can always have a long-term goal and try our best to attain it.
@min0822  
Hi there. Welcome back here to the forum. I hope you find this feedback helpful for your writing endeavors.  
  
Firstly, the introductory paragraph is quite messy because of the stretched out structure that requires a lot more precision. From the first sentence, you had already constructed a heavy paragraph that would make a reader have difficulty grasping the thesis statement of your work. Try working with simpler lines and compositions because of this.  
  
You had committed a similar mistake in the second paragraph. Try to stick with simpler and smaller chunks of text to help you evade this issue.  
  
The placement of example in the succeeding sentence also can be improved. If you add a concluding remark afterward, it would help improve your essay's overall outlook
## IELTS Task 2 - Food waste

  
  
EVERY DAY, MILLIONS OF TONS OF FOOD ARE WASTED ALL OVER THE WORLD. WHY DO YOU THINK THIS IS HAPPENING? AND HOW CAN WE SOLVE THIS PROBLEM?  
  
In recent decades, it is not an exaggeration to say that food waste is one of the biggest problems facing mankind. Given that this issue has the potential for significant environmental impacts, identifying the reasons is key to finding solutions.  
  
There are various reasons why food is being wasted in manifold areas of the world. In developed countries, most loss occurs at the consumption stage when people either cook too much or do not use the food in time. Since food is abundant for citizens living in industrialized nations and they do not know how to use leftovers, they just simply dispose of them which results in food waste. Meanwhile, production processes are stages that mainly contribute to food waste in developing countries. Due to lack of modern technical devices in harvesting as well as storage and cooling, fresh foods could be expired quickly and no longer edible or free of hazards and food waste will often happen as a consequence.  
  
Nevertheless, there are also a myriad of measures to mitigate this trend. First, raising awareness among people particularly in medium- and high-income countries is a useful solution to decrease the amount of losses and waste. For example, by using mainstream media, authorities can broadcast the benefits of saving food, especially for family's finances as well as for the good behavior of society, which could attract a great deal of audience's attention for this issue. Second, a strengthening of supply chain would help to reduce the amount of food waste, particularly in low-income countries. This focus should be on supporting farmers, investing in infrastructure, transportation and packaging industry so as to keep fresh foods last longer before they could be delivered to customer.  
  
In conclusion, even though food waste seems inevitable in today's world, there are various way to improve this problem. Both developed and developing nations should take steps immediately before it is socially unacceptable to waste food.  
  
**Please give me some feedback about this ielts essay. Thank youuuu!**
@Anthony VuNguyen  
Hello. Here to give you feedback on this essay. I hope you find this helpful and keep coming back for more!  
  
Firstly, the first paragraph lacks clarity on the direction of the essay. This portion should introduce not only the basis of the essay - it should also incorporate what readers should expect from the written work. You were unclear about what people should expect from this point onwards.  
  
I would also suggest working on the structure and utilization of appropriate pauses. Your second paragraph lacks this one. Notice how the second sentence appears to be rather unusually long. Try to cut things down a lot more to bolster the process.