id	raw_text	normalized_text	speaker_id	split	gender	is_gold_transcript	accent
"1.001"	" Immorality Act, 1927"	"Immorality Act,  one thousand, nine hundred and twenty seven ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1"	" Immorality Act, 1927"	"Immorality Act,  one thousand, nine hundred and twenty seven ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"10.1"	" Long before apartheid existed, these tribal factions clashed and warred with one another."	"Long before apartheid existed, these tribal factions clashed and warred with one another."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"10.2"	" Then, White Rule used that animosity to divide and conquer."	"Then, White Rule used that animosity to divide and conquer."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"10.4"	" then these groups were given different levels of rights and privileges in order to keep them at odds."	"then these groups were given different levels of rights and privileges in order to keep them at odds."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"100.02"	" No, mom, this was not thanks to God. You should have listened to God when He told us to stay at home when the car wouldn't start, because clearly the devil tricked us into coming out tonight."	"No, mom, this was not thanks to God. You should have listened to God when He told us to stay at home when the car wouldn't start, because clearly the devil tricked us into coming out tonight."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"100.03"	" No, Trevor. That's not how the devil works. This is part of God's plan, and if he wanted us here, then he had a reason."	"No, Trevor. That's not how the devil works. This is part of God's plan, and if he wanted us here, then he had a reason."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"100.04"	" and on and on. And there we were, back at it, arguing about God's will."	"and on and on. And there we were, back at it, arguing about God's will."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"100"	" But I was 9 years old and I knew better. I wasn't going to keep quiet this time. No, mom, this was not thanks to God. You should have listened to God when He told us to stay at home when the car wouldn't start. Because clearly the devil tricked us into coming out tonight. No, Trevor. That's not how the devil works. This is part of God's plan. And if He wanted us here, then He had a reason. And on and on. And there we were, back at it, arguing about God's will."	"But I was  nine  years old and I knew better. I wasn't going to keep quiet this time. No, mom, this was not thanks to God. You should have listened to God when He told us to stay at home when the car wouldn't start. Because clearly the devil tricked us into coming out tonight. No, Trevor. That's not how the devil works. This is part of God's plan. And if He wanted us here, then He had a reason. And on and on. And there we were, back at it, arguing about God's will."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1000"	" Now, the whole night came rushing back and I saw it from her point of view. And it was perfectly obvious to me why she didn't want to get out of the car. She probably hadn't wanted to go to the dance with me in the first place. She probably owed Tom a favor and Tom can talk anyone into anything. Then, I'd left her sitting and waiting for me for an hour and she was pissed off. Then she got into the car and it was the first time we had ever been alone. And she realized"	"Now, the whole night came rushing back and I saw it from her point of view. And it was perfectly obvious to me why she didn't want to get out of the car. She probably hadn't wanted to go to the dance with me in the first place. She probably owed Tom a favor and Tom can talk anyone into anything. Then, I'd left her sitting and waiting for me for an hour and she was pissed off. Then she got into the car and it was the first time we had ever been alone. And she realized."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1001"	" Bongani and I stood outside the car, staring at each other. I didn't know what to do. I tried talking to her in every language I knew. Nothing worked. She only spoke Bedi."	"Bongani and I stood outside the car, staring at each other. I didn't know what to do. I tried talking to her in every language I knew. Nothing worked. She only spoke Bedi."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1002"	" I got so desperate that I started trying to talk to her using hand signals. Please, you, me, inside, dance, yes? No. Inside, dance, please? No."	"I got so desperate that I started trying to talk to her using hand signals. Please, you, me, inside, dance, yes? No. Inside, dance, please? No."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1004"	" So, I never got to go to my metric dance. Other than the three minutes I spent running through it looking for someone who spoke beddy, I spent the whole night in the parking lot."	"So, I never got to go to my metric dance. Other than the three minutes I spent running through it looking for someone who spoke beddy, I spent the whole night in the parking lot."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1005"	" When the dance ended, I climbed back into the shitty red Mazda and drove Babiki home."	"When the dance ended, I climbed back into the shitty red Mazda and drove Babiki home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1006"	" We sat in total awkward silence the whole way."	"We sat in total awkward silence the whole way."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1007"	" I pulled up in front of her block of flats in Hillbrow, stopped the car, and sat for a moment as I tried to figure out the polite and gentlemanly way to end the evening."	"I pulled up in front of her block of flats in Hillbrow, stopped the car, and sat for a moment as I tried to figure out the polite and gentlemanly way to end the evening."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1009"	" She pulled back and I looked deep into her eyes and thought, I have no idea how girls work."	"She pulled back and I looked deep into her eyes and thought, I have no idea how girls work."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"101"	" Finally I said, look mom, I know you love Jesus, but maybe next week you could ask him to meet us at our house, because this really wasn't a fun night."	"Finally I said, look mom, I know you love Jesus, but maybe next week you could ask him to meet us at our house, because this really wasn't a fun night."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1010"	" I got out of the car, walked around to her side and opened her door. She gathered up her dress and stepped out, and headed toward her flat. And as she turned to go, I gave her one last little wave. Bye."	"I got out of the car, walked around to her side and opened her door. She gathered up her dress and stepped out, and headed toward her flat. And as she turned to go, I gave her one last little wave. Bye."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1011"	" Bye!"	"Bye!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1013.01"	" In Germany, No Child Finishes High School without learning about the Holocaust."	"In Germany, No Child Finishes High School without learning about the Holocaust."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1013.02"	" not just the facts of it, but the how and the why and the gravity of it."	"not just the facts of it, but the how and the why and the gravity of it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1013.03"	" what it means."	"what it means."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1013.04"	" As a result, Germans grow up appropriately aware and apologetic."	"As a result, Germans grow up appropriately aware and apologetic."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1013.06"	" Their children are taught the history of the empire, with a kind of disclaimer hanging over the whole thing."	"Their children are taught the history of the empire, with a kind of disclaimer hanging over the whole thing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1013.07"	" Well that was shameful now wasn't it?"	"Well that was shameful now wasn't it?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1013"	" In Germany, no child finishes high school without learning about the Holocaust. Not just the facts of it, but the how and the why and the gravity of it. What it means. As a result, Germans grow up appropriately aware and apologetic. British schools treat colonialism the same way, to an extent. Their children are taught the history of the empire, with a kind of disclaimer hanging over the whole thing. Well, that was shameful now, wasn't it?"	"In Germany, no child finishes high school without learning about the Holocaust. Not just the facts of it, but the how and the why and the gravity of it. What it means. As a result, Germans grow up appropriately aware and apologetic. British schools treat colonialism the same way, to an extent. Their children are taught the history of the empire, with a kind of disclaimer hanging over the whole thing. Well, that was shameful now, wasn't it?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1014"	" In South Africa, the atrocities of apartheid have never been taught that way. We weren't taught judgment or shame. We were taught history, the way it's taught in America. In America, the history of racism is taught like this. There was slavery, and then there was Jim Crow, and then there was Martin Luther King, Jr., and now it's done. It was the same for us. Apartheid was bad, Nelson Mandela was freed, let's move on."	"In South Africa, the atrocities of apartheid have never been taught that way. We weren't taught judgment or shame. We were taught history, the way it's taught in America. In America, the history of racism is taught like this. There was slavery, and then there was Jim Crow, and then there was Martin Luther King, Jr., and now it's done. It was the same for us. Apartheid was bad, Nelson Mandela was freed, let's move on."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1016"	" 15. Go Hitler."	" fifteen . Go Hitler."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1017"	" When I was in grade 9, three Chinese kids transferred to Sandringham. Bolo, Bruce Lee and John. They were the only Chinese pupils in the school out of a thousand. Bolo got his nickname because he looked like Bolo Young from the Jean-Claude Van Damme movie Blood Sports. Bruce Lee's name really was Bruce Lee, which made our lives. Here was this Chinese guy, quiet, good-looking, in great shape, and his name was Bruce Lee."	"When I was in grade  nine , three Chinese kids transferred to Sandringham. Bolo, Bruce Lee and John. They were the only Chinese pupils in the school out of a thousand. Bolo got his nickname because he looked like Bolo Young from the Jean Claude Van Damme movie Blood Sports. Bruce Lee's name really was Bruce Lee, which made our lives. Here was this Chinese guy, quiet, good looking, in great shape, and his name was Bruce Lee."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1018"	" I got to know Bolo because he was one of my tux-shop clients. Bolo's parents were professional pirates. They pirated video games and sold them at flea markets. As the son of pirates, Bolo did the same thing. He started selling bootleg PlayStation games around school. Kids would give him their PlayStation, and he'd bring it back a few days later with a chip in it, then enabled them to play pirated games, which he would then sell them. Bolo was friends with this white kid and a fellow pirate named Andrew."	"I got to know Bolo because he was one of my tux shop clients. Bolo's parents were professional pirates. They pirated video games and sold them at flea markets. As the son of pirates, Bolo did the same thing. He started selling bootleg PlayStation games around school. Kids would give him their PlayStation, and he'd bring it back a few days later with a chip in it, then enabled them to play pirated games, which he would then sell them. Bolo was friends with this white kid and a fellow pirate named Andrew."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1019"	" One day on my tux shop rounds, I heard Andrew and Bolo complaining about the black kids at school. They'd realized that they could take Andrew and Bolo's merchandise, say, I'll pay you later, and then not pay, because Andrew and Bolo were too scared of black people to go back to ask for the money. I leaned into their conversation and said, listen, you shouldn't get upset. Black people don't have any money. So trying to get more stuff for less money is just what we do. But let me help. I'll be your middleman. You give me the money."	"One day on my tux shop rounds, I heard Andrew and Bolo complaining about the black kids at school. They'd realized that they could take Andrew and Bolo's merchandise, say, I'll pay you later, and then not pay, because Andrew and Bolo were too scared of black people to go back to ask for the money. I leaned into their conversation and said, listen, you shouldn't get upset. Black people don't have any money. So trying to get more stuff for less money is just what we do. But let me help. I'll be your middleman. You give me the money."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1020"	" They liked the idea right away and we became partners."	"They liked the idea right away and we became partners."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1021"	" As the tuxop guy, I was perfectly positioned. I had my network set up. All I had to do was tap into it. With the money I made, selling CDs and video games, I was able to save up and add new components and more memory to my own computer. Andrew, the computer geek, showed me how to do it. Where to buy the cheapest parts, how to assemble them, how to repair them. He showed me how his business worked too. How to download music, where to get rewritable CDs in bulk."	"As the tuxop guy, I was perfectly positioned. I had my network set up. All I had to do was tap into it. With the money I made, selling CDs and video games, I was able to save up and add new components and more memory to my own computer. Andrew, the computer geek, showed me how to do it. Where to buy the cheapest parts, how to assemble them, how to repair them. He showed me how his business worked too. How to download music, where to get rewritable CDs in bulk."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1022"	" I worked as a middleman for Bolo and Andrew for a year. Then Bolo left school. The rumor was that his parents got arrested. From that point on, I worked for Andrew. And then, as he was about to matriculate, he decided to quit the game. Trevor, he told me, you've been a loyal partner. And as thanks, he bequeathed unto me his CD writer."	"I worked as a middleman for Bolo and Andrew for a year. Then Bolo left school. The rumor was that his parents got arrested. From that point on, I worked for Andrew. And then, as he was about to matriculate, he decided to quit the game. Trevor, he told me, you've been a loyal partner. And as thanks, he bequeathed unto me his CD writer."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1023"	" At the time, black people barely had access to computers. Let's start there. But a CD writer? That was the stuff of law. It was mythical. The day Andrew gave it to me, he changed my life. Thanks to him, I now controlled production, sales, distribution. I had everything I needed to lock down the bootleg business. I was a natural capitalist. I loved selling stuff. And I was selling something that everybody wanted."	"At the time, black people barely had access to computers. Let's start there. But a CD writer? That was the stuff of law. It was mythical. The day Andrew gave it to me, he changed my life. Thanks to him, I now controlled production, sales, distribution. I had everything I needed to lock down the bootleg business. I was a natural capitalist. I loved selling stuff. And I was selling something that everybody wanted."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1025"	" Thanks to the internet, I could get anyone anything. I never judged anyone's taste in music. You wanted the new Nirvana? I got you the new Nirvana. You wanted the new DMX? I got you the new DMX. Local South African music was big, but Black American music was what people were desperate for. Hip-hop and R&B. Jagged Edge was huge. 112 was huge. I sold a lot of Montel Jordan. So much Montel Jordan."	"Thanks to the internet, I could get anyone anything. I never judged anyone's taste in music. You wanted the new Nirvana? I got you the new Nirvana. You wanted the new DMX? I got you the new DMX. Local South African music was big, but Black American music was what people were desperate for. Hip hop and R and B. Jagged Edge was huge.  one hundred and twelve  was huge. I sold a lot of Montel Jordan. So much Montel Jordan."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1026"	" When I started, I had a dial-up connection and a 24K modem. It would take a day to download an album. But technology kept evolving and I kept reinvesting in the business. I upgraded to a 56K modem. I got faster CD writers. Multiple CD writers. I started downloading more, copying more, selling more. That's when I got two middlemen of my own. My friend Tom, who went to Northview, and my friend Mungani, who lived in Alex."	"When I started, I had a dial up connection and a  twenty four K modem. It would take a day to download an album. But technology kept evolving and I kept reinvesting in the business. I upgraded to a  fifty six K modem. I got faster CD writers. Multiple CD writers. I started downloading more, copying more, selling more. That's when I got two middlemen of my own. My friend Tom, who went to Northview, and my friend Mungani, who lived in Alex."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1027"	" One day, Bongani came to me and said, you know what would make a lot of money? Instead of copying whole albums, why don't you put the best tracks of different albums onto one CD? Because people only want to hear the songs they like. That sounded like a great idea. So I started making mixed CDs. Those sold well. Then a few weeks later, Bongani came back and said, can you make the tracks fade into one another so the music moves from track one to track two without a break and the beat carries on?"	"One day, Bongani came to me and said, you know what would make a lot of money? Instead of copying whole albums, why don't you put the best tracks of different albums onto one CD? Because people only want to hear the songs they like. That sounded like a great idea. So I started making mixed CDs. Those sold well. Then a few weeks later, Bongani came back and said, can you make the tracks fade into one another so the music moves from track one to track two without a break and the beat carries on?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1028"	" I started making party CDs, and those started selling like hotcakes too."	"I started making party CDs, and those started selling like hotcakes too."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"103"	" Apartheid was perfect racism. It took centuries to develop, starting all the way back in 1652 when the Dutch East India Company landed at the Cape of Good Hope and established a trading colony, Kappstatt, later known as Cape Town, a rest stop for ships travelling between Europe and India."	"Apartheid was perfect racism. It took centuries to develop, starting all the way back in  one thousand, six hundred and fifty two  when the Dutch East India Company landed at the Cape of Good Hope and established a trading colony, Kappstatt, later known as Cape Town, a rest stop for ships travelling between Europe and India."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1030"	" With money, I experienced freedom on a whole new level."	"With money, I experienced freedom on a whole new level."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1031"	" I went to McDonald's."	"I went to McDonald's."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1032"	" People in America don't understand, but when an American chain opens in a third world country, people go crazy. That's true to this day. A Burger King opened for the first time in South Africa last year, and there was a queue around the block. It was an event. Everyone was going around saying, I have to eat at Burger King. Have you heard? It's from America. The funny thing was that the queue was actually just white people. White people went batshit crazy for Burger King."	"People in America don't understand, but when an American chain opens in a third world country, people go crazy. That's true to this day. A Burger King opened for the first time in South Africa last year, and there was a queue around the block. It was an event. Everyone was going around saying, I have to eat at Burger King. Have you heard? It's from America. The funny thing was that the queue was actually just white people. White people went batshit crazy for Burger King."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1034"	" I fell in love with McDonald's. McDonald's to me tasted like America. McDonald's is America. You see it advertised and it looks amazing. You crave it. You buy it. You take your first bite and it blows your mind. It's even better than you imagined."	"I fell in love with McDonald's. McDonald's to me tasted like America. McDonald's is America. You see it advertised and it looks amazing. You crave it. You buy it. You take your first bite and it blows your mind. It's even better than you imagined."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1035"	" Then, halfway through, you realize it's not all it's cracked up to be. A few bites later, you're like, hmm, there's a lot wrong with this. Then you're done. You miss it like crazy, and you go back for more."	"Then, halfway through, you realize it's not all it's cracked up to be. A few bites later, you're like, hmm, there's a lot wrong with this. Then you're done. You miss it like crazy, and you go back for more."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1036"	" Once I'd had the taste of America, I never ate at home. I only ate McDonald's. McDonald's, McDonald's, McDonald's, McDonald's. Every night, my mom would try to cook me dinner. Tonight we're having chicken livers. No, I'm gonna have McDonald's. Tonight we're having dog bones. I think I'm gonna go with McDonald's again. Tonight we're having chicken feet. Mmm, okay, I'm in. But tomorrow, I'm eating McDonald's."	"Once I'd had the taste of America, I never ate at home. I only ate McDonald's. McDonald's, McDonald's, McDonald's, McDonald's. Every night, my mom would try to cook me dinner. Tonight we're having chicken livers. No, I'm gonna have McDonald's. Tonight we're having dog bones. I think I'm gonna go with McDonald's again. Tonight we're having chicken feet. Mmm, okay, I'm in. But tomorrow, I'm eating McDonald's."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1037"	" The money kept rolling in and I was bawling out of control. This is how bawling I was. I bought a cordless telephone. This was before everyone had a cell phone. The range on this cordless phone was strong enough that I could put the base outside my window, walk the two blocks to McDonald's, order my large number one, walk back home, go up to my room and fire up my computer carrying on a conversation the whole time."	"The money kept rolling in and I was bawling out of control. This is how bawling I was. I bought a cordless telephone. This was before everyone had a cell phone. The range on this cordless phone was strong enough that I could put the base outside my window, walk the two blocks to McDonald's, order my large number one, walk back home, go up to my room and fire up my computer carrying on a conversation the whole time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1039"	" Andrew was white. His family had access to education, resources, computers. For generations, while his people were preparing to go to university, my people were crowded into thatched huts singing, 2 times 2 is 4, 3 times 2 is 6, la la la la la. My family had been denied the things his family had taken for granted. I had a natural talent for selling to people, but without knowledge and resources, where was that going to get me?"	"Andrew was white. His family had access to education, resources, computers. For generations, while his people were preparing to go to university, my people were crowded into thatched huts singing,  two  times  two  is  four ,  three  times  two  is  six , la la la la la. My family had been denied the things his family had taken for granted. I had a natural talent for selling to people, but without knowledge and resources, where was that going to get me?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"104"	" To impose White Rule, the Dutch colonists went to war with the natives, ultimately developing a set of laws to subjugate and enslave them."	"To impose White Rule, the Dutch colonists went to war with the natives, ultimately developing a set of laws to subjugate and enslave them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1040"	" People always lecture the poor, take responsibility for yourself, make something of yourself. But with what raw materials are the poor to make something of themselves? People love to say, give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll eat for a lifetime."	"People always lecture the poor, take responsibility for yourself, make something of yourself. But with what raw materials are the poor to make something of themselves? People love to say, give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll eat for a lifetime."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1041"	" What they don't say is, and it would be nice if you gave him a fishing rod. That's the part of the analogy that's missing."	"What they don't say is, and it would be nice if you gave him a fishing rod. That's the part of the analogy that's missing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1043"	" One afternoon, I was in my room, making a CD, when Bongani came over to pick up his inventory. He saw me mixing songs on my computer. That is insane, he said. Are you doing this live? Yeah. Trevor, I don't think you understand. You're sitting on a gold mine. We need to do this for a crowd. You need to come to the township and start DJing gigs. No one has ever seen a DJ playing on a computer before."	"One afternoon, I was in my room, making a CD, when Bongani came over to pick up his inventory. He saw me mixing songs on my computer. That is insane, he said. Are you doing this live? Yeah. Trevor, I don't think you understand. You're sitting on a gold mine. We need to do this for a crowd. You need to come to the township and start DJing gigs. No one has ever seen a DJ playing on a computer before."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1044"	" Bongani lived in Alexandra. Where Soweto is a sprawling government-planned ghetto, Alexandra is a tiny, dense pocket of a shanty town, left over from the pre-apartheid days. Rows and rows of cinder block and corrugated iron shacks practically stacked on top of one another. Its nickname is Gamora, because it has the wildest parties and the worst crimes."	"Bongani lived in Alexandra. Where Soweto is a sprawling government planned ghetto, Alexandra is a tiny, dense pocket of a shanty town, left over from the pre apartheid days. Rows and rows of cinder block and corrugated iron shacks practically stacked on top of one another. Its nickname is Gamora, because it has the wildest parties and the worst crimes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1045"	" Street parties are the best thing about Alexandra. You get a tent, put it up in the middle of the road, take over the street, and you've got a party. There's no formal invitations or guest list. You just tell a few people. Word of mouth travels and a crowd appears. There are no permits, nothing like that. If you own a tent, you have the right to throw a party in your street. Cars creep up to the intersection and the driver will see the party blocking their way and shrug and make a U-turn. Nobody gets upset"	"Street parties are the best thing about Alexandra. You get a tent, put it up in the middle of the road, take over the street, and you've got a party. There's no formal invitations or guest list. You just tell a few people. Word of mouth travels and a crowd appears. There are no permits, nothing like that. If you own a tent, you have the right to throw a party in your street. Cars creep up to the intersection and the driver will see the party blocking their way and shrug and make a U turn. Nobody gets upset."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1046"	" Back then, most DJs could spin for only a few hours. They were limited by the number of vinyls they could buy. Since parties went all night, you might need five or six DJs to keep the dancing going. But I had a massive hard drive, stuffed with MP3s, which is why Bongani was excited when he saw me mixing. He saw a way to corner the market. How much music do you have? he asked. Winam says I can play for a week. We'll make a fortune!"	"Back then, most DJs could spin for only a few hours. They were limited by the number of vinyls they could buy. Since parties went all night, you might need five or six DJs to keep the dancing going. But I had a massive hard drive, stuffed with MP three s, which is why Bongani was excited when he saw me mixing. He saw a way to corner the market. How much music do you have? he asked. Winam says I can play for a week. We'll make a fortune!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1048"	" By midnight, the whole street was packed from one end to the other. Hours was the biggest New Year's Eve party in Alexandra that year. And to have the biggest party in Alexandra is no joke. All night, from far and wide, people kept coming. The word spread. There's a light-skinned guy who plays music on a computer. You've never seen anything like it. I DJ'd by myself until dawn. By then, me and my friends were so drunk and exhausted that we paused."	"By midnight, the whole street was packed from one end to the other. Hours was the biggest New Year's Eve party in Alexandra that year. And to have the biggest party in Alexandra is no joke. All night, from far and wide, people kept coming. The word spread. There's a light skinned guy who plays music on a computer. You've never seen anything like it. I DJ'd by myself until dawn. By then, me and my friends were so drunk and exhausted that we paused."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1049"	" When Bongani and I graduated from high school, we couldn't get jobs. There were no jobs for us to get. The only ways I had to make money were pirating CDs and DJing parties. And now that I'd left Sandringham, the minibus drivers and corner kids in Alexandra were the single biggest market for my CDs. It was also where I was playing the most gigs. So to keep earning, I naturally gravitated that way. Most of the white kids I knew were taking a gap year."	"When Bongani and I graduated from high school, we couldn't get jobs. There were no jobs for us to get. The only ways I had to make money were pirating CDs and DJing parties. And now that I'd left Sandringham, the minibus drivers and corner kids in Alexandra were the single biggest market for my CDs. It was also where I was playing the most gigs. So to keep earning, I naturally gravitated that way. Most of the white kids I knew were taking a gap year."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"105"	" When the British took over the Cape Colony, the descendants of the original Dutch settlers trekked inland and developed their own language, culture and customs, eventually becoming their own people, the Afrikaners, the white tribe of Africa."	"When the British took over the Cape Colony, the descendants of the original Dutch settlers trekked inland and developed their own language, culture and customs, eventually becoming their own people, the Afrikaners, the white tribe of Africa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1050"	" There was a low brick wall running down the middle of the road in front of Bongani's house in Alex. And every day, Bongani and I and our crew would go sit on the wall. I'd bring my CDs, we'd play music and practice dance moves. We hustled CDs all day and DJ'd parties at night. We started getting booked for gigs in other townships, other hoods."	"There was a low brick wall running down the middle of the road in front of Bongani's house in Alex. And every day, Bongani and I and our crew would go sit on the wall. I'd bring my CDs, we'd play music and practice dance moves. We hustled CDs all day and DJ'd parties at night. We started getting booked for gigs in other townships, other hoods."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1052"	" Hitler was a great friend of mine, and good Lord could that guy dance. He was mesmerizing to watch. He had a looseness and a fluidity that defied physics. Imagine a jellyfish, if it could walk on land. Incredibly handsome too, tall and lithe and muscular, with beautiful smooth skin, big teeth and a great smile, always laughing. And all he did was dance. He'd be up in the morning blasting house"	"Hitler was a great friend of mine, and good Lord could that guy dance. He was mesmerizing to watch. He had a looseness and a fluidity that defied physics. Imagine a jellyfish, if it could walk on land. Incredibly handsome too, tall and lithe and muscular, with beautiful smooth skin, big teeth and a great smile, always laughing. And all he did was dance. He'd be up in the morning blasting house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1053"	" In the hood, everybody knows who the best dancer in the crew is. He's like your status symbol. When you're poor, you don't have cars or nice clothes, but the best dancer gets girls. So that's the guy you want to roll with. Hitler was our guy. There were parties with dance competitions. Kids from every neighborhood would come and bring their best dancers. We'd always bring Hitler. And he almost always won."	"In the hood, everybody knows who the best dancer in the crew is. He's like your status symbol. When you're poor, you don't have cars or nice clothes, but the best dancer gets girls. So that's the guy you want to roll with. Hitler was our guy. There were parties with dance competitions. Kids from every neighborhood would come and bring their best dancers. We'd always bring Hitler. And he almost always won."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1054"	" When Bongani and I put together a routine for our dance crew, there was no question who was going to be the star attraction. We built the whole set around Hitler. I'd warm the crowd up with a few songs, then the dancers would come out and do a couple of numbers. Once they'd gotten the party started, they'd fan out to form a semicircle around the stage with a gap in the back for Hitler to enter. I'd crank up Red Man's Let's Get Dirty and start whipping the crowd up even more."	"When Bongani and I put together a routine for our dance crew, there was no question who was going to be the star attraction. We built the whole set around Hitler. I'd warm the crowd up with a few songs, then the dancers would come out and do a couple of numbers. Once they'd gotten the party started, they'd fan out to form a semicircle around the stage with a gap in the back for Hitler to enter. I'd crank up Red Man's Let's Get Dirty and start whipping the crowd up even more."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1055"	" Hitler, although an unusual name, is not unheard of in South Africa. Part of it has to do with the way a lot of black people pick names. Black people choose their traditional names with great care. Those are the names that have deeply personal meanings. But from colonial times through the days of apartheid, black people in South Africa were required to have an English or European name as well. A name that white people could pronounce basically."	"Hitler, although an unusual name, is not unheard of in South Africa. Part of it has to do with the way a lot of black people pick names. Black people choose their traditional names with great care. Those are the names that have deeply personal meanings. But from colonial times through the days of apartheid, black people in South Africa were required to have an English or European name as well. A name that white people could pronounce basically."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1057"	" Westerners are shocked and confused by that. But really, it's a case of the West reaping what it has sown."	"Westerners are shocked and confused by that. But really, it's a case of the West reaping what it has sown."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1058"	" The colonial powers carved up Africa, put the black man to work, and did not properly educate him. White people don't talk to black people. So why would black people know what's going on in the white man's world? Because of that, many black people in South Africa don't really know who Hitler was. My own grandfather thought a Hitler was a kind of army tank that was helping the Germans win the war, because that's what he took from what he heard on the news."	"The colonial powers carved up Africa, put the black man to work, and did not properly educate him. White people don't talk to black people. So why would black people know what's going on in the white man's world? Because of that, many black people in South Africa don't really know who Hitler was. My own grandfather thought a Hitler was a kind of army tank that was helping the Germans win the war, because that's what he took from what he heard on the news."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1059"	" So, if you want your dog to be tough, you name your dog Hitler. If you want your kid to be tough, you name your kid Hitler. There's a good chance you've got an uncle named Hitler. It's just a thing."	"So, if you want your dog to be tough, you name your dog Hitler. If you want your kid to be tough, you name your kid Hitler. There's a good chance you've got an uncle named Hitler. It's just a thing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"106"	" The British abolished slavery in name but kept it in practice. They did so because, in the mid-1800s, in what had been written off as a near worthless way station on the route to the Far East, a few lucky capitalists stumbled upon the richest gold and diamond reserves in the world. And an endless supply of expendable bodies was needed to go into the ground and get it all out."	"The British abolished slavery in name but kept it in practice. They did so because, in the mid  one thousand, eight hundred s, in what had been written off as a near worthless way station on the route to the Far East, a few lucky capitalists stumbled upon the richest gold and diamond reserves in the world. And an endless supply of expendable bodies was needed to go into the ground and get it all out."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1061"	" All we were taught was that in 1939 Hitler invaded Poland and in 1941 he invaded the Soviet Union and in 1943 he did something else. They're just facts. Memorize them, write them down for the test and forget them."	"All we were taught was that in  one thousand, nine hundred and thirty nine  Hitler invaded Poland and in  one thousand, nine hundred and forty one  he invaded the Soviet Union and in  one thousand, nine hundred and forty three  he did something else. They're just facts. Memorize them, write them down for the test and forget them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1062"	" There is also this to consider. The name Hitler does not offend a black South African because Hitler is not the worst thing a black South African can imagine. Every country thinks their history is the most important, and that's especially true in the West. But if black South Africans could go back in time and kill one person, Cecil John Rhodes would come up before Hitler. If people in the Congo could go back in time and kill one person, Belgium's King Leopold would come way before Hitler."	"There is also this to consider. The name Hitler does not offend a black South African because Hitler is not the worst thing a black South African can imagine. Every country thinks their history is the most important, and that's especially true in the West. But if black South Africans could go back in time and kill one person, Cecil John Rhodes would come up before Hitler. If people in the Congo could go back in time and kill one person, Belgium's King Leopold would come way before Hitler."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1063"	" I often meet people in the West who insist the Holocaust was the worst atrocity in human history without question. Yes, it was horrific. But I often wonder, with African atrocities like in the Congo, how horrific were they?"	"I often meet people in the West who insist the Holocaust was the worst atrocity in human history without question. Yes, it was horrific. But I often wonder, with African atrocities like in the Congo, how horrific were they?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1064"	" The thing Africans don't have, that Jewish people do have, is documentation. The Nazis kept meticulous records, took pictures, made films. And that's really what it comes down to. Holocaust victims count because Hitler counted them. Six million people killed. We can all look at that number and rightly be horrified. But when you read through the history of atrocities against Africans, there are no numbers, only guesses."	"The thing Africans don't have, that Jewish people do have, is documentation. The Nazis kept meticulous records, took pictures, made films. And that's really what it comes down to. Holocaust victims count because Hitler counted them. Six million people killed. We can all look at that number and rightly be horrified. But when you read through the history of atrocities against Africans, there are no numbers, only guesses."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1066"	" Once Bongani and I added the dancers to our DJ sets, we blew up. We called our group the Black and White Boys. The dancers were called the Springbok Boys. We started getting booked everywhere. Successful Black families were moving to the suburbs, but their kids still wanted to have block parties and stay connected to the culture of the townships. So they'd book us to play their parties. Word of mouth traveled. Pretty soon, we were getting booked more and more in the suburbs, meeting White people, playing for White people."	"Once Bongani and I added the dancers to our DJ sets, we blew up. We called our group the Black and White Boys. The dancers were called the Springbok Boys. We started getting booked everywhere. Successful Black families were moving to the suburbs, but their kids still wanted to have block parties and stay connected to the culture of the townships. So they'd book us to play their parties. Word of mouth traveled. Pretty soon, we were getting booked more and more in the suburbs, meeting White people, playing for White people."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1067"	" One kid we knew from the township, his mother was involved in creating cultural programs for schools. In America, they'd be called diversity programs. They were springing up all over South Africa because we were supposed to be learning about and embracing one another in this post-apartheid era. This kid's mom asked us if we wanted to play at a cultural day at some school in Lynxfield, the wealthy suburb south of Sandringham, where my pal Teddy had lived. There was going to be all"	"One kid we knew from the township, his mother was involved in creating cultural programs for schools. In America, they'd be called diversity programs. They were springing up all over South Africa because we were supposed to be learning about and embracing one another in this post apartheid era. This kid's mom asked us if we wanted to play at a cultural day at some school in Lynxfield, the wealthy suburb south of Sandringham, where my pal Teddy had lived. There was going to be all."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1068"	" she offered to pay. So we said sure. She sent us the information with the time and place and the name of the school. The King David School. A Jewish school."	"she offered to pay. So we said sure. She sent us the information with the time and place and the name of the school. The King David School. A Jewish school."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1069"	" The day of the event, we booked a minibus, loaded it up with our gear and drove over. Once we arrived, we waited in the back of the school's assembly hall and watched the acts that went on stage before us. Different groups took their turns performing, flamenco dancers, Greek dancers, traditional Zulu musicians. Then we were up."	"The day of the event, we booked a minibus, loaded it up with our gear and drove over. Once we arrived, we waited in the back of the school's assembly hall and watched the acts that went on stage before us. Different groups took their turns performing, flamenco dancers, Greek dancers, traditional Zulu musicians. Then we were up."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1070"	" We were billed as the hip-hop panzula dancers, the South African B-Boys. We set up our sound system on stage. I looked out and the whole hall was nothing but Jewish kids in their yamakas ready to party. I got on the mic. Are you ready to rock out? Yeah! Make some noise. Yeah! I started playing. The bass was bumping."	"We were billed as the hip hop panzula dancers, the South African B Boys. We set up our sound system on stage. I looked out and the whole hall was nothing but Jewish kids in their yamakas ready to party. I got on the mic. Are you ready to rock out? Yeah! Make some noise. Yeah! I started playing. The bass was bumping."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1071"	" I started the song. The dancers fanned out in their semicircle, and I got on the mic."	"I started the song. The dancers fanned out in their semicircle, and I got on the mic."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1072"	" Are you guys ready? Yeah! You guys are not ready, are you ready? Yeah! Alright, give it up and make some noise for Hitler! Hitler jumped out to the middle of the circle and started killing it. The guys around him were all chanting, Go Hitler! Go Hitler! Go Hitler! Go Hitler!"	"Are you guys ready? Yeah! You guys are not ready, are you ready? Yeah! Alright, give it up and make some noise for Hitler! Hitler jumped out to the middle of the circle and started killing it. The guys around him were all chanting, Go Hitler! Go Hitler! Go Hitler! Go Hitler!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1073"	" The whole room stopped. No one was dancing. The teachers, the chaperones, the parents, the hundreds of Jewish kids in their yarmulkes, they froze and stared aghast at us up on the stage. I was oblivious. So was Hitler. We kept going. For a good 30 seconds, the only sound in the room was the beats of the music and me on the mic yelling, go Hitler, go Hitler, go Hitler, put your hands in the air."	"The whole room stopped. No one was dancing. The teachers, the chaperones, the parents, the hundreds of Jewish kids in their yarmulkes, they froze and stared aghast at us up on the stage. I was oblivious. So was Hitler. We kept going. For a good  thirty  seconds, the only sound in the room was the beats of the music and me on the mic yelling, go Hitler, go Hitler, go Hitler, put your hands in the air."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1075"	" As I started packing up my gear, we kept arguing. Listen lady, we're free now. We're gonna do what we're gonna do. You can't stop us. I'll have you know that my people stopped people like you before and we can stop you again."	"As I started packing up my gear, we kept arguing. Listen lady, we're free now. We're gonna do what we're gonna do. You can't stop us. I'll have you know that my people stopped people like you before and we can stop you again."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1076"	" She was talking of course about stopping the Nazis in World War II, but that's not what I was hearing. Jews in South Africa are just white people. All I was hearing was some white lady shouting about how white people beat us before and they'll beat us again. I said, you will never stop us again, lady. And here's where I played the trump card. You'll never stop us because now we have Nelson Mandela on our side and"	"She was talking of course about stopping the Nazis in World War II, but that's not what I was hearing. Jews in South Africa are just white people. All I was hearing was some white lady shouting about how white people beat us before and they'll beat us again. I said, you will never stop us again, lady. And here's where I played the trump card. You'll never stop us because now we have Nelson Mandela on our side and."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1077"	" Alexandra was a farm originally named for the wife of a white man who owned it. Like Sophia Town and other black spots populating white areas before apartheid, Alex started out as a squatter settlement where blacks gathered and lived when coming to Johannesburg to find work. What was unique about Alex is that this farmer sold plots of land to some of the black tenants in the time before it was illegal for blacks to own property. So while Sophia Town and other black ghettos were raised and rebuilt as white suburbs,"	"Alexandra was a farm originally named for the wife of a white man who owned it. Like Sophia Town and other black spots populating white areas before apartheid, Alex started out as a squatter settlement where blacks gathered and lived when coming to Johannesburg to find work. What was unique about Alex is that this farmer sold plots of land to some of the black tenants in the time before it was illegal for blacks to own property. So while Sophia Town and other black ghettos were raised and rebuilt as white suburbs,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1078"	" Soweto was beautiful because, after democracy, you watched Soweto grow. Soweto has become a proper city unto itself. People went from three-room houses to five-room houses to three-bedroom houses with garages. There was room to grow because the piece of land from the government gave you something to build on. Alexandra can't do that. Alex can't get any bigger because it's pinned in on all sides and it can't build up because it's mostly shacks."	"Soweto was beautiful because, after democracy, you watched Soweto grow. Soweto has become a proper city unto itself. People went from three room houses to five room houses to three bedroom houses with garages. There was room to grow because the piece of land from the government gave you something to build on. Alexandra can't do that. Alex can't get any bigger because it's pinned in on all sides and it can't build up because it's mostly shacks."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"108"	" Apartheid was a police state, a system of surveillance and laws designed to keep black people under total control."	"Apartheid was a police state, a system of surveillance and laws designed to keep black people under total control."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1080"	" 16. The Cheese Boys"	" sixteen . The Cheese Boys."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1081"	" My friend Bongani was a short, bald, super buff guy. He wasn't always that way. His whole life he'd been skinny and then a bodybuilding magazine found its way into his hands and changed his life."	"My friend Bongani was a short, bald, super buff guy. He wasn't always that way. His whole life he'd been skinny and then a bodybuilding magazine found its way into his hands and changed his life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1082"	" Bongani was one of those people who brought out the best in everybody. He was that friend who believed in you and saw the potential in you that nobody else did, which was why so many of the Township Kids gravitated toward him, and why I gravitated toward him as well. Bongani was always popular, but his reputation really took off when he beat up one of the more infamous bullies in the school. That cemented his status as sort of the leader and protector of the Township Kids."	"Bongani was one of those people who brought out the best in everybody. He was that friend who believed in you and saw the potential in you that nobody else did, which was why so many of the Township Kids gravitated toward him, and why I gravitated toward him as well. Bongani was always popular, but his reputation really took off when he beat up one of the more infamous bullies in the school. That cemented his status as sort of the leader and protector of the Township Kids."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1084"	" I'd been to Alex a few times for brief visits, but I'd never spent any real time there. I've never been there at night. Let's put it that way. Going to Alex during the day is different from going there at night. The place was nicknamed Gomorrah for a reason."	"I'd been to Alex a few times for brief visits, but I'd never spent any real time there. I've never been there at night. Let's put it that way. Going to Alex during the day is different from going there at night. The place was nicknamed Gomorrah for a reason."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1085"	" One day after school, not long before we matriculated, Bongani walked up to me on the quad. Hey, let's go to the hood, he said. The hood? At first, I had no idea what he was talking about. I knew the word hood from rap songs, and I knew the different townships where black people lived, but I had never used the one to describe the other."	"One day after school, not long before we matriculated, Bongani walked up to me on the quad. Hey, let's go to the hood, he said. The hood? At first, I had no idea what he was talking about. I knew the word hood from rap songs, and I knew the different townships where black people lived, but I had never used the one to describe the other."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1086"	" The walls of apartheid were coming down just as American hip-hop was blowing up. And hip-hop made it cool to be from the hood. Before, living in a township was something to be ashamed of. It was the bottom of the bottom. Then, we had movies like Boys in the Hood and Menace to Society. And they made the hood look cool. The characters in those movies, in the songs, they owned it. Kids in the townships started doing the same, wearing their identity"	"The walls of apartheid were coming down just as American hip hop was blowing up. And hip hop made it cool to be from the hood. Before, living in a township was something to be ashamed of. It was the bottom of the bottom. Then, we had movies like Boys in the Hood and Menace to Society. And they made the hood look cool. The characters in those movies, in the songs, they owned it. Kids in the townships started doing the same, wearing their identity."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1087"	" When Bongani took me to Alex, we entered, as most people do, from the Sandton side. You ride through one of the richest neighborhoods in Johannesburg, past palatial mansions and huge money. Then you go through the industrial belt of Weinberg that cordoned off the rich and white from the poor and black. At the entrance to Alex, there's the huge minibus rank and the bus station."	"When Bongani took me to Alex, we entered, as most people do, from the Sandton side. You ride through one of the richest neighborhoods in Johannesburg, past palatial mansions and huge money. Then you go through the industrial belt of Weinberg that cordoned off the rich and white from the poor and black. At the entrance to Alex, there's the huge minibus rank and the bus station."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1089"	" Right next to the minibus rank, of course, is a KFC. That's one thing about South Africa. There's always a KFC. KFC found the black people. KFC did not play games. They were in the hood before McDonald's, before Burger King, before anyone. KFC was like, yo, we're here for you."	"Right next to the minibus rank, of course, is a KFC. That's one thing about South Africa. There's always a KFC. KFC found the black people. KFC did not play games. They were in the hood before McDonald's, before Burger King, before anyone. KFC was like, yo, we're here for you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"109"	" A full compendium of these laws would run more than 3,000 pages and weigh approximately 10 pounds. But the general thrust of it should be easy enough for any American to understand."	"A full compendium of these laws would run more than  three , zero  pages and weigh approximately  ten  pounds. But the general thrust of it should be easy enough for any American to understand."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1090"	" Once you go past the minibus rank, you're in Alex proper."	"Once you go past the minibus rank, you're in Alex proper."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1091"	" I've been in few places where there's an electricity like there is in Alex. It's a hive of constant human activity. All day long, people coming and going. Gangsters hustling, guys on the corner doing nothing, kids running around. There's nowhere for all that energy to go. No mechanism for it to dissipate. So it erupts periodically in epic acts of violence and crazy parties. One minute, it'll be a placid afternoon, people hanging out,"	"I've been in few places where there's an electricity like there is in Alex. It's a hive of constant human activity. All day long, people coming and going. Gangsters hustling, guys on the corner doing nothing, kids running around. There's nowhere for all that energy to go. No mechanism for it to dissipate. So it erupts periodically in epic acts of violence and crazy parties. One minute, it'll be a placid afternoon, people hanging out,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1093"	" Alex is laid out on a grid, a series of avenues. The streets are paved, but the sidewalks are mostly dirt. The colour scheme is cinder block and corrugated iron, grey and dark grey, punctuated by bright splashes of colour. Someone's painted a wall lime green, or there's a bright red sign above a takeaway shop. Or maybe somebody's picked up a bright blue piece of sheet metal just by luck."	"Alex is laid out on a grid, a series of avenues. The streets are paved, but the sidewalks are mostly dirt. The colour scheme is cinder block and corrugated iron, grey and dark grey, punctuated by bright splashes of colour. Someone's painted a wall lime green, or there's a bright red sign above a takeaway shop. Or maybe somebody's picked up a bright blue piece of sheet metal just by luck."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1094"	" There's little in the way of basic sanitation. Trashes everywhere. Typically a garbage fire going down some side streets. There's always something burning in the hood."	"There's little in the way of basic sanitation. Trashes everywhere. Typically a garbage fire going down some side streets. There's always something burning in the hood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1095"	" As you walk, there's every smell you can imagine. People are cooking, eating takeaways in the streets. Some family has a shack that's jury-rigged onto the back of someone else's shack, and they don't have any running water. So they've bathed in a bucket from the outdoor tap and then dumped the dirty water in the street, where it runs into the river of sewerage that's already there because the water system has backed up again."	"As you walk, there's every smell you can imagine. People are cooking, eating takeaways in the streets. Some family has a shack that's jury rigged onto the back of someone else's shack, and they don't have any running water. So they've bathed in a bucket from the outdoor tap and then dumped the dirty water in the street, where it runs into the river of sewerage that's already there because the water system has backed up again."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1096"	" There's a guy fixing cars who thinks he knows what he's doing, but he doesn't. He's dumping old motor oil into the street and now the oil is combining with the dirty bathwater to make a river of filth running down the streets. There's probably a goat hanging around. There's always a goat. As you're walking, sound washes over you. The steady thrum of human activity. People talking in a dozen different languages. Chatting, haggling, arguing."	"There's a guy fixing cars who thinks he knows what he's doing, but he doesn't. He's dumping old motor oil into the street and now the oil is combining with the dirty bathwater to make a river of filth running down the streets. There's probably a goat hanging around. There's always a goat. As you're walking, sound washes over you. The steady thrum of human activity. People talking in a dozen different languages. Chatting, haggling, arguing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1098"	" After 20th Avenue, you hit the Yookské River. And on the far side of that, across the Roosevelt Street Bridge was East Bank. The newest, nicest part of the hood. East Bank was where the government had gone in, cleared out the squatters and their shacks and started to build actual homes. It was still low-income housing, but decent two-bedroom houses with tiny yards. The families who lived there had a bit of money and usually sent their kids out of the hood to better school."	"After  twenty th Avenue, you hit the Yookské River. And on the far side of that, across the Roosevelt Street Bridge was East Bank. The newest, nicest part of the hood. East Bank was where the government had gone in, cleared out the squatters and their shacks and started to build actual homes. It was still low income housing, but decent two bedroom houses with tiny yards. The families who lived there had a bit of money and usually sent their kids out of the hood to better school."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1099"	" I graduated from high school when I was 17 and by that point life at home had become toxic because of my stepfather. I didn't want to be there anymore and my mom agreed that I should move out. She helped me move to a cheap, roach-infested flat in a building down the road. My plan, insofar as I had one, was to go to university to be a computer programmer. But we couldn't afford the tuition. I needed to make money. The only way I knew how to make money was selling pirated CDs."	"I graduated from high school when I was  seventeen  and by that point life at home had become toxic because of my stepfather. I didn't want to be there anymore and my mom agreed that I should move out. She helped me move to a cheap, roach infested flat in a building down the road. My plan, insofar as I had one, was to go to university to be a computer programmer. But we couldn't afford the tuition. I needed to make money. The only way I knew how to make money was selling pirated CDs."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"11"	" Perhaps the starkest of those divisions was between South Africa's two dominant tribes, the Zulu and the Tosa."	"Perhaps the starkest of those divisions was between South Africa's two dominant tribes, the Zulu and the Tosa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"110"	" In America, you had the forced removal of the native onto reservations, coupled with slavery, followed by segregation."	"In America, you had the forced removal of the native onto reservations, coupled with slavery, followed by segregation."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1101"	" For us, the ultimate upgrade was to throw on a slice of cheese. Cheese was always the thing because it was so expensive. Forget the gold standard. The hood operated on the cheese standard. Cheese on anything was money. If you got a burger, that was cool. But if you got a cheeseburger, that meant you had more money than a guy who just got a hamburger. Cheese on a sandwich. Cheese in your fridge. That meant you were living"	"For us, the ultimate upgrade was to throw on a slice of cheese. Cheese was always the thing because it was so expensive. Forget the gold standard. The hood operated on the cheese standard. Cheese on anything was money. If you got a burger, that was cool. But if you got a cheeseburger, that meant you had more money than a guy who just got a hamburger. Cheese on a sandwich. Cheese in your fridge. That meant you were living."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1102"	" In any township in South Africa, if you had a bit of money, people would say, oh, you're a cheese boy. In essence, you're not really hood because your family has enough money to buy cheese."	"In any township in South Africa, if you had a bit of money, people would say, oh, you're a cheese boy. In essence, you're not really hood because your family has enough money to buy cheese."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1103"	" In Alex, because Bongani and his crew lived in East Bank, they were considered cheese boys. Ironically, because they lived on the first street just over the river, they were looked down on as the scruff of East Bank, and the kids in the nicer houses higher up in East Bank were the cheesier cheese boys. Bongani and his crew would never admit to being cheese boys. They would insist, we're not cheese, we're hood. But then the real hood guys would say, hey, you're not hood."	"In Alex, because Bongani and his crew lived in East Bank, they were considered cheese boys. Ironically, because they lived on the first street just over the river, they were looked down on as the scruff of East Bank, and the kids in the nicer houses higher up in East Bank were the cheesier cheese boys. Bongani and his crew would never admit to being cheese boys. They would insist, we're not cheese, we're hood. But then the real hood guys would say, hey, you're not hood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1104"	" Cheese boys were in a uniquely fucked situation when apartheid ended. It is one thing to be born in the hood and know that you will never leave the hood. But the cheese boy has been shown the world outside. His family has done okay. They have a house. They've sent him to a decent school. Maybe he's even matriculated. He has been given more potential, but he has not been given more opportunity. He has been given an awareness of the world that is out there, but he has not been given the means"	"Cheese boys were in a uniquely fucked situation when apartheid ended. It is one thing to be born in the hood and know that you will never leave the hood. But the cheese boy has been shown the world outside. His family has done okay. They have a house. They've sent him to a decent school. Maybe he's even matriculated. He has been given more potential, but he has not been given more opportunity. He has been given an awareness of the world that is out there, but he has not been given the means."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1106"	" The unemployment rate for young black men post-apartheid shot up, sometimes as high as 50%. What happens to a lot of guys is they finish high school and they can't afford university. And even little retail jobs can be hard to come by when you're from the hood and you look and talk a certain way. So, for many young men in South African townships, freedom looks like this. Every morning they wake up. Maybe their parents go to work or maybe not."	"The unemployment rate for young black men post apartheid shot up, sometimes as high as  fifty  percent . What happens to a lot of guys is they finish high school and they can't afford university. And even little retail jobs can be hard to come by when you're from the hood and you look and talk a certain way. So, for many young men in South African townships, freedom looks like this. Every morning they wake up. Maybe their parents go to work or maybe not."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1107"	" One of the first things I learned in the hood is that there's a very fine line between civilian and criminal. We like to believe we live in a world of good guys and bad guys. And in the suburbs it's easy to believe that, because getting to know a career criminal in the suburbs is a difficult thing. But then you go to the hood and you see there are so many shades in between."	"One of the first things I learned in the hood is that there's a very fine line between civilian and criminal. We like to believe we live in a world of good guys and bad guys. And in the suburbs it's easy to believe that, because getting to know a career criminal in the suburbs is a difficult thing. But then you go to the hood and you see there are so many shades in between."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1108"	" In the hood, gangsters were your friends and neighbours. You knew them. You talked to them on the corner, saw them at parties. They were a part of your world. You knew them from before they became gangsters. It wasn't, hey, that's a crack dealer. It was, oh, little Jimmy selling crack now. The weird thing about these gangsters was that they were all, at a glance, identical. They drove the same red sports car. They dated the same"	"In the hood, gangsters were your friends and neighbours. You knew them. You talked to them on the corner, saw them at parties. They were a part of your world. You knew them from before they became gangsters. It wasn't, hey, that's a crack dealer. It was, oh, little Jimmy selling crack now. The weird thing about these gangsters was that they were all, at a glance, identical. They drove the same red sports car. They dated the same."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1109"	" In the hood, even if you're not a hardcore criminal, crime is in your life in some way or another. There are degrees of it. It's everyone from the mom buying some food that fell off the back of a truck to feed her family, all the way up to the gangs selling military-grade weapons and hardware. The hood made me realize that crime succeeds because crime does the one thing the government doesn't do. Crime cares. Crime is grassroots. Crime looks for the young kids who need support and a lifting hand."	"In the hood, even if you're not a hardcore criminal, crime is in your life in some way or another. There are degrees of it. It's everyone from the mom buying some food that fell off the back of a truck to feed her family, all the way up to the gangs selling military grade weapons and hardware. The hood made me realize that crime succeeds because crime does the one thing the government doesn't do. Crime cares. Crime is grassroots. Crime looks for the young kids who need support and a lifting hand."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1110"	" Crime offers internship programs and summer jobs and opportunities for advancement. Crime gets involved in the community. Crime doesn't discriminate."	"Crime offers internship programs and summer jobs and opportunities for advancement. Crime gets involved in the community. Crime doesn't discriminate."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1111"	" My life of crime started off small, selling pirated CDs on the corner. That in itself was a crime. And today I feel like I owe all these artists money for stealing their music. But by hood standards, it didn't even qualify as illegal. At the time, it never occurred to any of us that we were doing anything wrong. If copying CDs is wrong, why would they make CD writers?"	"My life of crime started off small, selling pirated CDs on the corner. That in itself was a crime. And today I feel like I owe all these artists money for stealing their music. But by hood standards, it didn't even qualify as illegal. At the time, it never occurred to any of us that we were doing anything wrong. If copying CDs is wrong, why would they make CD writers?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1112"	" The garage of Bongani's house opened up onto Springbok Crescent. Every morning, we'd open up the doors, run an extension cord out into the street, set up a table and play music. People would walk by and ask, what's that? Can I get one, please? Our corner was also where a lot of minibus drivers ended their routes and turned around to loop back to the minibus rank. They'd swing by, place an order, come back, pick it up, swing by, place an order,"	"The garage of Bongani's house opened up onto Springbok Crescent. Every morning, we'd open up the doors, run an extension cord out into the street, set up a table and play music. People would walk by and ask, what's that? Can I get one, please? Our corner was also where a lot of minibus drivers ended their routes and turned around to loop back to the minibus rank. They'd swing by, place an order, come back, pick it up, swing by, place an order,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1113"	" We spent our whole day running out to them, going back to the garage to make more mixes and going back out to sell. There was a converted shipping container around the corner where we'd hang out when we got tired of the wall. It had a payphone installed inside that we'd use to call people."	"We spent our whole day running out to them, going back to the garage to make more mixes and going back out to sell. There was a converted shipping container around the corner where we'd hang out when we got tired of the wall. It had a payphone installed inside that we'd use to call people."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1115"	" Selling slowly evolved into hustling because Bongani saw all the angles and knew how to exploit them. Like Tom, Bongani was a hustler. But where Tom was only about the short con, Bongani had schemes. If we do this, we get that. Then we can flip that for the other thing, which gives us the leverage we need to get something bigger."	"Selling slowly evolved into hustling because Bongani saw all the angles and knew how to exploit them. Like Tom, Bongani was a hustler. But where Tom was only about the short con, Bongani had schemes. If we do this, we get that. Then we can flip that for the other thing, which gives us the leverage we need to get something bigger."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1116"	" Some minibus drivers couldn't pay up front, for example. I don't have the money because I've just started my shift, they'd say. But I need new music. Can I owe you guys some form of credit? I'll owe you a ride. I'll pay you at the end of my shift. At the end of the week. So we started letting drivers buy on credit. Charging them a bit of interest."	"Some minibus drivers couldn't pay up front, for example. I don't have the money because I've just started my shift, they'd say. But I need new music. Can I owe you guys some form of credit? I'll owe you a ride. I'll pay you at the end of my shift. At the end of the week. So we started letting drivers buy on credit. Charging them a bit of interest."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1117"	" We started making more money. Never more than a few hundred, maybe a thousand rand at a time. But it was all cash on hand."	"We started making more money. Never more than a few hundred, maybe a thousand rand at a time. But it was all cash on hand."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1118"	" Bongani was quick to realize the position we were in."	"Bongani was quick to realize the position we were in."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"112"	" That was apartheid."	"That was apartheid."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1120"	" Cash gave us leverage in the hood's barter economy as well. It's common knowledge that if you're standing at a corner of a main street in the hood, somebody's gonna try to sell you something. Yo, yo, yo, my man. You want some weed? You wanna buy a VCR? You wanna buy a DVD player? Yo, I'm selling a TV. That's just how it works."	"Cash gave us leverage in the hood's barter economy as well. It's common knowledge that if you're standing at a corner of a main street in the hood, somebody's gonna try to sell you something. Yo, yo, yo, my man. You want some weed? You wanna buy a VCR? You wanna buy a DVD player? Yo, I'm selling a TV. That's just how it works."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1121"	" Let's say we see two guys haggling on the corner. A crackhead trying to sell a DVD player and some working dude who wants it but doesn't have the money because he hasn't got his wages yet. They're going back and forth but the crackhead wants the money now. Crackheads don't wait. There's no layaway plan with a crackhead."	"Let's say we see two guys haggling on the corner. A crackhead trying to sell a DVD player and some working dude who wants it but doesn't have the money because he hasn't got his wages yet. They're going back and forth but the crackhead wants the money now. Crackheads don't wait. There's no layaway plan with a crackhead."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1122"	" So Bongani steps in and takes the working guy aside. Look."	"So Bongani steps in and takes the working guy aside. Look."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1124"	" The crackhead protests a bit, but then he takes the money because he's a crackhead and it's cash. And crack is all about the now. Then Bongani goes back to the working guy. All right, we'll do 120. Here's your DVD player, it's yours. But I don't have the 120. It's cool. You can take it now. Only instead of 120, you give us 140 when you get your wages. Okay."	"The crackhead protests a bit, but then he takes the money because he's a crackhead and it's cash. And crack is all about the now. Then Bongani goes back to the working guy. All right, we'll do  one hundred and twenty . Here's your DVD player, it's yours. But I don't have the  one hundred and twenty . It's cool. You can take it now. Only instead of  one hundred and twenty , you give us  one hundred and forty  when you get your wages. Okay."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1125"	" So, now we've invested 50 rand with the crackhead and that gets us 140 from the working guy. But Bongani would see a way to flip it and grow it again. Let's say this guy who bought the DVD player worked at a shoe store. How much do you pay for a pair of Nikes with your stuff discount? Bongani would ask. I can get a pair of Nikes for 150. Okay, instead of you giving us 140, we'll give you 10 and you get us a pair of Nikes with your discount."	"So, now we've invested  fifty  rand with the crackhead and that gets us  one hundred and forty  from the working guy. But Bongani would see a way to flip it and grow it again. Let's say this guy who bought the DVD player worked at a shoe store. How much do you pay for a pair of Nikes with your stuff discount? Bongani would ask. I can get a pair of Nikes for  one  fifty . Okay, instead of you giving us  one hundred and forty , we'll give you  ten  and you get us a pair of Nikes with your discount."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1126"	" So now, this guy's walking away with a DVD player and 10 rand in his pockets. He's feeling like he got a good deal. He brings us the Nikes and then we go to one of the cheesier cheese boys up in East Bank and we say, yo dude, we know you want the new Jordans. They're 300 in the shops. We'll sell them to you for 200. We sell him the shoes and now we've gone and turned 60 rand into 200. That's the hood. Someone's always buying."	"So now, this guy's walking away with a DVD player and  ten  rand in his pockets. He's feeling like he got a good deal. He brings us the Nikes and then we go to one of the cheesier cheese boys up in East Bank and we say, yo dude, we know you want the new Jordans. They're  three hundred  in the shops. We'll sell them to you for  two hundred . We sell him the shoes and now we've gone and turned  sixty  rand into  two hundred . That's the hood. Someone's always buying."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127.01"	" At first, I didn't know not to ask."	"At first, I didn't know not to ask."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127.03"	" But who did this belong to? I said."	"But who did this belong to? I said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127.04"	" Hey, don't worry about it, one of the guys told me."	"Hey, don't worry about it, one of the guys told me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127.05"	" White people have insurance."	"White people have insurance."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127.06"	" Insurance"	"Insurance."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127.09"	" So it's like they've lost nothing."	"So it's like they've lost nothing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127.10"	" Oh, okay, I said."	"Oh, okay, I said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127.11"	" Sounds nice."	"Sounds nice."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1127"	" At first, I didn't know not to ask. I remember one time, we bought a car stereo or something like that. But who did this belong to? I said. Hey, don't worry about it. One of the guys told me. White people have insurance. Insurance? Yeah. When white people lose stuff, they have insurance policies that pay them cash for what they've lost. So it's like they've lost nothing. Oh, okay. I said. Sounds nice."	"At first, I didn't know not to ask. I remember one time, we bought a car stereo or something like that. But who did this belong to? I said. Hey, don't worry about it. One of the guys told me. White people have insurance. Insurance? Yeah. When white people lose stuff, they have insurance policies that pay them cash for what they've lost. So it's like they've lost nothing. Oh, okay. I said. Sounds nice."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1129"	" It's easy to be judgmental about crime when you live in a world wealthy enough to be removed from it. But the hood taught me that everyone has different notions of right and wrong. Different definitions of what constitutes crime and what level of crime they're willing to participate in."	"It's easy to be judgmental about crime when you live in a world wealthy enough to be removed from it. But the hood taught me that everyone has different notions of right and wrong. Different definitions of what constitutes crime and what level of crime they're willing to participate in."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"113"	" 2. Born a crime."	" two . Born a crime."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1130"	" If a crackhead comes through and he's got a crate of cornflakes boxes he's stolen out of the back of a supermarket, the poor mom isn't thinking, I'm aiding and abetting a criminal by buying these cornflakes. No, she's thinking, my family needs food and this guy has cornflakes and she buys the cornflakes."	"If a crackhead comes through and he's got a crate of cornflakes boxes he's stolen out of the back of a supermarket, the poor mom isn't thinking, I'm aiding and abetting a criminal by buying these cornflakes. No, she's thinking, my family needs food and this guy has cornflakes and she buys the cornflakes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1131"	" My own mother, my super religious law-abiding mother, who used to shit on me about breaking the rules and learning to behave. I'll never forget one day I came home and in the kitchen was a giant box of frozen burger patties, like 200 of them, from a takeaway place called Black Steer. A burger at Black Steer cost at least 20 rand."	"My own mother, my super religious law abiding mother, who used to shit on me about breaking the rules and learning to behave. I'll never forget one day I came home and in the kitchen was a giant box of frozen burger patties, like  two hundred  of them, from a takeaway place called Black Steer. A burger at Black Steer cost at least  twenty  rand."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1133"	" Every day in the hood was the same."	"Every day in the hood was the same."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1134"	" I'd wake up early. Bongani would meet me at my flat and we'd catch a mini bus to Alex with my computer, carrying the giant tower and the giant heavy monitor the whole way. We'd set it up in Bongani's garage and start the first batch of CDs. Then we'd walk. We'd go down to the corner of 19th and Roosevelt for breakfast. When you're trying to stretch your money, food is where you have to be careful. You have to plan or you'll eat your profits. So every morning for breakfast,"	"I'd wake up early. Bongani would meet me at my flat and we'd catch a mini bus to Alex with my computer, carrying the giant tower and the giant heavy monitor the whole way. We'd set it up in Bongani's garage and start the first batch of CDs. Then we'd walk. We'd go down to the corner of  nineteen th and Roosevelt for breakfast. When you're trying to stretch your money, food is where you have to be careful. You have to plan or you'll eat your profits. So every morning for breakfast,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1135"	" Then, we'd just be on the corner, hanging out, meeting characters, seeing who came by, seeing where the day was going to take us. A guy needs this. A guy is selling that. You never knew what it was going to be."	"Then, we'd just be on the corner, hanging out, meeting characters, seeing who came by, seeing where the day was going to take us. A guy needs this. A guy is selling that. You never knew what it was going to be."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1136"	" There was always a big rush of business at lunch. We'd be all over Alexandra, hitting different shops and corners, making deals with everyone. We'd get free rides from the minibus drivers because we'd hop in with them and use it as an opportunity to talk about what music they needed. But secretly, we were riding with the guy for free."	"There was always a big rush of business at lunch. We'd be all over Alexandra, hitting different shops and corners, making deals with everyone. We'd get free rides from the minibus drivers because we'd hop in with them and use it as an opportunity to talk about what music they needed. But secretly, we were riding with the guy for free."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1138"	" After lunch, we'd head back to the garage, relax, sleep off the meal and make more CDs. In the afternoons, we'd see a lot of moms. Moms loved us. They were some of our best customers. Since moms run the household, they're the ones looking to buy that box of soap that fell off the back of the truck. And they were more likely to buy it from us than from some crackhead. Dealing with crackheads is unpleasant. We were upstanding, well-spoken"	"After lunch, we'd head back to the garage, relax, sleep off the meal and make more CDs. In the afternoons, we'd see a lot of moms. Moms loved us. They were some of our best customers. Since moms run the household, they're the ones looking to buy that box of soap that fell off the back of the truck. And they were more likely to buy it from us than from some crackhead. Dealing with crackheads is unpleasant. We were upstanding, well spoken."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1139"	" We made some of the craziest trades. Moms in the hood are protective of their daughters, especially if their daughters are pretty."	"We made some of the craziest trades. Moms in the hood are protective of their daughters, especially if their daughters are pretty."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"114"	" I grew up in South Africa during apartheid, which was awkward because I was raised in a mixed family. Well, with me being the mixed one in the family."	"I grew up in South Africa during apartheid, which was awkward because I was raised in a mixed family. Well, with me being the mixed one in the family."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1140"	" In Alex, there were girls who got locked up."	"In Alex, there were girls who got locked up."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1142"	" Then that mom would need a loan. Once we lent her the money, until she paid us back, she couldn't chase us away from her house. We'd go by and hang out, chat, make small talk. The daughter would be right there but the mom wouldn't say, don't talk to these boys. The loan gave us access to establish a relationship with the mom. We'd get invited to stay for dinner. Once the mom knew we were nice, upstanding guys, she'd agreed to let us take her daughter"	"Then that mom would need a loan. Once we lent her the money, until she paid us back, she couldn't chase us away from her house. We'd go by and hang out, chat, make small talk. The daughter would be right there but the mom wouldn't say, don't talk to these boys. The loan gave us access to establish a relationship with the mom. We'd get invited to stay for dinner. Once the mom knew we were nice, upstanding guys, she'd agreed to let us take her daughter."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1143"	" We'll bring the girl to your party and you get to hang out with her. How much can you give us? I don't have money, he'd say, but I have some cases of beer. Okay, so tonight we're going to this party. You give us two cases of beer for the party. Cool."	"We'll bring the girl to your party and you get to hang out with her. How much can you give us? I don't have money, he'd say, but I have some cases of beer. Okay, so tonight we're going to this party. You give us two cases of beer for the party. Cool."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1144"	" Then we'd go to the party. We'd invite the girl, who was usually thrilled to escape her mother's prison. The guy would bring the beer. He'd get to hang out with the girl. We'd write off the mom's debt to show her our gratitude, and we'd make our money back selling the beer. There was always a way to make it work. And often, that was the most fun part. Working the angles. Solving the puzzle. Seeing what goes where. Who needs what. Whom we can connect with who can then get us the money."	"Then we'd go to the party. We'd invite the girl, who was usually thrilled to escape her mother's prison. The guy would bring the beer. He'd get to hang out with the girl. We'd write off the mom's debt to show her our gratitude, and we'd make our money back selling the beer. There was always a way to make it work. And often, that was the most fun part. Working the angles. Solving the puzzle. Seeing what goes where. Who needs what. Whom we can connect with who can then get us the money."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1145"	" At the peak of our operation, we probably had around 10,000 rand in capital. We had loans going out and interest coming in. We had our stockpile of Jordans and DVD players we'd bought to resell. We'd also had to buy blank CDs, hire minibuses to go to all our DJ gigs, feed five guys three times a day. We kept track of everything on the computer. Having lived in my mom's world, I knew how to do spreadsheets."	"At the peak of our operation, we probably had around  ten , zero  rand in capital. We had loans going out and interest coming in. We had our stockpile of Jordans and DVD players we'd bought to resell. We'd also had to buy blank CDs, hire minibuses to go to all our DJ gigs, feed five guys three times a day. We kept track of everything on the computer. Having lived in my mom's world, I knew how to do spreadsheets."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.02"	" Mini bus drivers picking up one last order"	"Mini bus drivers picking up one last order."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.03"	" Men coming home from work."	"Men coming home from work."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.04"	" The men weren't looking for soap and cornflakes."	"The men weren't looking for soap and cornflakes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.05"	" they wanted the gear."	"they wanted the gear."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.07"	" More guys would come through selling stuff too."	"More guys would come through selling stuff too."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.08"	" because they'd been out hustling and stealing all day."	"because they'd been out hustling and stealing all day."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.09"	" There'd be a guy selling a cell phone."	"There'd be a guy selling a cell phone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.10"	" A guy selling some leather jacket."	"A guy selling some leather jacket."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.12"	" There was this one dude who looked like a black version of Mr. Burns from The Simpsons."	"There was this one dude who looked like a black version of Mr. Burns from The Simpsons."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.13"	" He'd always come by at the end of his shift with the most random useless crap."	"He'd always come by at the end of his shift with the most random useless crap."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146.14"	" like an electric toothbrush without the charger."	"like an electric toothbrush without the charger."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1146"	" After work was when business started to pick up. Mini bus drivers picking up one last order. Men coming home from work. The men weren't looking for soap and cornflakes. They wanted the gear. DVD players. CD players. PlayStation games. More guys would come through selling stuff too because they'd been out hustling and stealing all day. There'd be a guy selling a cell phone. A guy selling some leather jackets. A guy selling shoes. There was this one dude who looked like a"	"After work was when business started to pick up. Mini bus drivers picking up one last order. Men coming home from work. The men weren't looking for soap and cornflakes. They wanted the gear. DVD players. CD players. PlayStation games. More guys would come through selling stuff too because they'd been out hustling and stealing all day. There'd be a guy selling a cell phone. A guy selling some leather jackets. A guy selling shoes. There was this one dude who looked like a."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1148"	" We never knew where he was getting this stuff from, because you don't ask. Eventually, we pieced it together though. He worked at the airport. It was all the crap he was boosting from people's luggage."	"We never knew where he was getting this stuff from, because you don't ask. Eventually, we pieced it together though. He worked at the airport. It was all the crap he was boosting from people's luggage."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1149"	" Slowly, the rush would start to taper off and we'd wind down. We'd make our last collections, go over our CD stock, balance our accounts. If there was a party to DJ that night, we'd start getting ready for that. Otherwise, we'd buy a few beers and sit around and drink, talk about the day, listen to the gunshots in the distance. Gunshots went off every night and we'd always try to guess what kind of gun it was. That's a 9mm. Usually, there'd be a police"	"Slowly, the rush would start to taper off and we'd wind down. We'd make our last collections, go over our CD stock, balance our accounts. If there was a party to DJ that night, we'd start getting ready for that. Otherwise, we'd buy a few beers and sit around and drink, talk about the day, listen to the gunshots in the distance. Gunshots went off every night and we'd always try to guess what kind of gun it was. That's a  nine mm. Usually, there'd be a police."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"115"	" My mother, Patricia Nombuis Elornoa, is black. My father Robert is white. Swiss German to be precise, which Swiss Germans invariably are."	"My mother, Patricia Nombuis Elornoa, is black. My father Robert is white. Swiss German to be precise, which Swiss Germans invariably are."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1150"	" A year passed, then two. I had stopped planning for school and was no closer to having the money to enroll."	"A year passed, then two. I had stopped planning for school and was no closer to having the money to enroll."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1152"	" I was out there every day from 7am to 7pm. And every day it was, how do we turn 10 rand into 20? How do we turn 20 into 50? How do I turn 50 into 100?"	"I was out there every day from  seven am to  seven pm. And every day it was, how do we turn  ten  rand into  twenty ? How do we turn  twenty  into  fifty ? How do I turn  fifty  into  ten  o ?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1153"	" At the end of the day, we'd spend it on food and maybe some beers. And then we'd go home and come back and it was, how do we turn 10 into 20? How do we turn 20 into 50? It was a whole day's work to flip that money. You had to be walking, be moving, be thinking. You had to get to a guy, find a guy, meet a guy. There were many days we'd end up back at zero, but I always felt like I'd been very productive."	"At the end of the day, we'd spend it on food and maybe some beers. And then we'd go home and come back and it was, how do we turn  ten  into  twenty ? How do we turn  twenty  into  fifty ? It was a whole day's work to flip that money. You had to be walking, be moving, be thinking. You had to get to a guy, find a guy, meet a guy. There were many days we'd end up back at zero, but I always felt like I'd been very productive."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1154"	" Hustling is to work what surfing the internet is to reading. If you add up how much you read in a year on the internet, tweets, Facebook, posts, lists, you've read the equivalent of a shit ton of books. But in fact, you've read no books in a year."	"Hustling is to work what surfing the internet is to reading. If you add up how much you read in a year on the internet, tweets, Facebook, posts, lists, you've read the equivalent of a shit ton of books. But in fact, you've read no books in a year."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1155"	" When I look back on it, that's what hustling was. It's maximal effort put into minimal gain. It's a hamster wheel. If I put all that energy into studying, I'd have earned an MBA. Instead, I was majoring in hustling, something no university would give me a degree for."	"When I look back on it, that's what hustling was. It's maximal effort put into minimal gain. It's a hamster wheel. If I put all that energy into studying, I'd have earned an MBA. Instead, I was majoring in hustling, something no university would give me a degree for."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1157"	" The hood is also a low stress comfortable life. All your mental energy goes into getting by, so you don't have to ask yourself any of the big questions. Who am I? Who am I supposed to be? Am I doing enough?"	"The hood is also a low stress comfortable life. All your mental energy goes into getting by, so you don't have to ask yourself any of the big questions. Who am I? Who am I supposed to be? Am I doing enough?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1158"	" In the hood, you can be a 45-year-old man living in your mom's house asking people for money, and it's not looked down on. You never feel like a failure in the hood, because someone's always worse off than you. And you don't feel like you need to do more, because the biggest success isn't that much higher than you either. It allows you to exist in a state of suspended animation."	"In the hood, you can be a  forty five  year old man living in your mom's house asking people for money, and it's not looked down on. You never feel like a failure in the hood, because someone's always worse off than you. And you don't feel like you need to do more, because the biggest success isn't that much higher than you either. It allows you to exist in a state of suspended animation."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1159"	" The hood has a wonderful sense of community to it as well. Everyone knows everyone, from the crackhead all the way through to the policeman."	"The hood has a wonderful sense of community to it as well. Everyone knows everyone, from the crackhead all the way through to the policeman."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"116"	" During apartheid, one of the worst crimes you could commit was having sexual relations with a person of another race. Needless to say, my parents committed that crime."	"During apartheid, one of the worst crimes you could commit was having sexual relations with a person of another race. Needless to say, my parents committed that crime."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1161"	" Then she gives you some money and you go buy milk and bread. As long as you aren't busy and it doesn't cost you anything, you don't say no."	"Then she gives you some money and you go buy milk and bread. As long as you aren't busy and it doesn't cost you anything, you don't say no."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1162"	" The biggest thing in the hood is that you have to share. You can't get rich on your own."	"The biggest thing in the hood is that you have to share. You can't get rich on your own."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1163"	" You have money? Why aren't you helping people? The old lady on the block needs help. Everyone pitches in. You're buying beer? You buy for everyone. You spread it around. Everyone must know that your success benefits the community in one way or another. Or you become a target."	"You have money? Why aren't you helping people? The old lady on the block needs help. Everyone pitches in. You're buying beer? You buy for everyone. You spread it around. Everyone must know that your success benefits the community in one way or another. Or you become a target."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1164"	" The township polices itself as well. If someone is caught stealing, the township deals with them. If someone is caught breaking into a house, the township deals with them. If you're caught raping a woman, pray to God the police find you before the township does. If a woman is being hit, people don't get involved. There are too many questions with a beating. What's the fight about? Who's responsible? Who started it? But rape is rape."	"The township polices itself as well. If someone is caught stealing, the township deals with them. If someone is caught breaking into a house, the township deals with them. If you're caught raping a woman, pray to God the police find you before the township does. If a woman is being hit, people don't get involved. There are too many questions with a beating. What's the fight about? Who's responsible? Who started it? But rape is rape."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1166"	" One morning after a month of G working at the place we were hanging out on the wall and G came out in his slippers and his socks. He wasn't dressed for work. Yo G, what's going on? What's up with the job?"	"One morning after a month of G working at the place we were hanging out on the wall and G came out in his slippers and his socks. He wasn't dressed for work. Yo G, what's going on? What's up with the job?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1167"	" Oh, I don't work there anymore. Why? They accused me of stealing something and I got fired."	"Oh, I don't work there anymore. Why? They accused me of stealing something and I got fired."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1168"	" And I'll never forget thinking to myself that it felt like he did it on purpose."	"And I'll never forget thinking to myself that it felt like he did it on purpose."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1169"	" He sabotaged himself so that he'd get accepted back into the group again."	"He sabotaged himself so that he'd get accepted back into the group again."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1170"	" The hood has a gravitational pull. It never leaves you behind, but it also never lets you leave. Because by making the choice to leave, you're insulting the place that raised you and made you and never turned you away. And that place fights you back."	"The hood has a gravitational pull. It never leaves you behind, but it also never lets you leave. Because by making the choice to leave, you're insulting the place that raised you and made you and never turned you away. And that place fights you back."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1171"	" As soon as things start going well for you in the hood, it's time to go. Because the hood will drag you back in. It will find a way. There'll be a guy who steals a thing and puts it in your car and the cops find it. Something. You can't stay. You think you can. You'll start doing better and you'll bring your hood friends out to a nice club. And the next thing you know, somebody starts a fight and one of your friends pulls a gun and somebody's getting shot. And you're left standing around going,"	"As soon as things start going well for you in the hood, it's time to go. Because the hood will drag you back in. It will find a way. There'll be a guy who steals a thing and puts it in your car and the cops find it. Something. You can't stay. You think you can. You'll start doing better and you'll bring your hood friends out to a nice club. And the next thing you know, somebody starts a fight and one of your friends pulls a gun and somebody's getting shot. And you're left standing around going,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1172"	" The hood happened."	"The hood happened."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1173"	" One night I was DJing a party, not in Alex, but right outside Alex in Lombardi East, a nicer middle class black neighborhood. The police were called about the noise. They came busting in wearing riot gear and pointing machine guns. That's how our police roll. We don't have small and then big. What Americans call SWAT is just our regular police. They came looking for the source of the music and the music was coming from me. This one cop came over to where I was with my computer"	"One night I was DJing a party, not in Alex, but right outside Alex in Lombardi East, a nicer middle class black neighborhood. The police were called about the noise. They came busting in wearing riot gear and pointing machine guns. That's how our police roll. We don't have small and then big. What Americans call SWAT is just our regular police. They came looking for the source of the music and the music was coming from me. This one cop came over to where I was with my computer."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1175"	" The tear gas had nothing to do with me or the music. Tear gas is just what the police used to shut down parties in black neighborhoods. Like the club, turning on the lights to tell everyone to go home."	"The tear gas had nothing to do with me or the music. Tear gas is just what the police used to shut down parties in black neighborhoods. Like the club, turning on the lights to tell everyone to go home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1176"	" I lost the hard drive."	"I lost the hard drive."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1177"	" Even though the cops shot the monitor, the explosion somehow fried the thing. The computer would still boot up, but it couldn't read the drive. My music library was gone. Even if I'd had the money for a new hard drive, it had taken me years to amass the music collection. There was no way to replace it. The DJing business was over. The CD selling business was done. All of a sudden, our crew lost its main revenue stream. All we had left was the"	"Even though the cops shot the monitor, the explosion somehow fried the thing. The computer would still boot up, but it couldn't read the drive. My music library was gone. Even if I'd had the money for a new hard drive, it had taken me years to amass the music collection. There was no way to replace it. The DJing business was over. The CD selling business was done. All of a sudden, our crew lost its main revenue stream. All we had left was the."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1178"	" Then one evening after work, our friend from the airport, the black Mr. Burns, came by. Hey, look what I found, he said. What have you got? A camera."	"Then one evening after work, our friend from the airport, the black Mr. Burns, came by. Hey, look what I found, he said. What have you got? A camera."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"118"	" humans being humans and sex being sex, that prohibition never stopped anyone."	"humans being humans and sex being sex, that prohibition never stopped anyone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1180"	" Yeah, some guy might get fired because of the pallets of cornflakes that went missing from the supermarket. But that's degrees removed. You don't think about it. But this camera had a face. I went through those pictures, knowing how much my family pictures meant to me. And I thought, I haven't stolen a camera. I've stolen someone's memories. I've stolen part of someone's life."	"Yeah, some guy might get fired because of the pallets of cornflakes that went missing from the supermarket. But that's degrees removed. You don't think about it. But this camera had a face. I went through those pictures, knowing how much my family pictures meant to me. And I thought, I haven't stolen a camera. I've stolen someone's memories. I've stolen part of someone's life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1181"	" It's such a strange thing, but in two years of hustling, I never once thought of it as a crime. I honestly didn't think it was bad. It's just stuff people found. White people have insurance. Whatever rationalization was handy. In society, we do horrible things to one another because we don't see the person it affects. We don't see their face. We don't see them as people. Which was the whole reason the hood was built in the first place."	"It's such a strange thing, but in two years of hustling, I never once thought of it as a crime. I honestly didn't think it was bad. It's just stuff people found. White people have insurance. Whatever rationalization was handy. In society, we do horrible things to one another because we don't see the person it affects. We don't see their face. We don't see them as people. Which was the whole reason the hood was built in the first place."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1182"	" Because if white people ever saw black people as human, they would see that slavery is unconscionable."	"Because if white people ever saw black people as human, they would see that slavery is unconscionable."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1184"	" If we could see one another's pain and empathize with one another, it would never be worth it to us to commit the crimes in the first place."	"If we could see one another's pain and empathize with one another, it would never be worth it to us to commit the crimes in the first place."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1185"	" As much as we needed the money, I never sold the camera. I felt too guilty, like it would be bad karma, which I know sounds stupid and it didn't get the family their camera back, but I just couldn't do it. That camera made me confront the fact that there were people on the other end of this thing I was doing. And what I was doing was wrong."	"As much as we needed the money, I never sold the camera. I felt too guilty, like it would be bad karma, which I know sounds stupid and it didn't get the family their camera back, but I just couldn't do it. That camera made me confront the fact that there were people on the other end of this thing I was doing. And what I was doing was wrong."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1186"	" One night our crew got invited to dance in Soweto against another crew. Hitler was going to compete with their best dancer, Hector, who was one of the best dancers in South Africa at the time."	"One night our crew got invited to dance in Soweto against another crew. Hitler was going to compete with their best dancer, Hector, who was one of the best dancers in South Africa at the time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1187"	" This invitation was a huge deal. We were going over there, wrapping our hood. Alex and Soweto have always had a huge rivalry. Soweto was seen as the snobbish township and Alexandra was seen as the gritty and dirty township. Hector was from Diepluwief, which was the nice, well-off part of Soweto. Diepluwief was where the first million-rand houses were built after democracy. Hey, we're not a township anymore."	"This invitation was a huge deal. We were going over there, wrapping our hood. Alex and Soweto have always had a huge rivalry. Soweto was seen as the snobbish township and Alexandra was seen as the gritty and dirty township. Hector was from Diepluwief, which was the nice, well off part of Soweto. Diepluwief was where the first million rand houses were built after democracy. Hey, we're not a township anymore."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1189"	" On our way back to Alex around 1 in the morning, as we were pulling out of Dibgluf to get onto the freeway, some cops pulled our minibus over."	"On our way back to Alex around  one  in the morning, as we were pulling out of Dibgluf to get onto the freeway, some cops pulled our minibus over."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"119"	" There were mixed kids in South Africa nine months after the first Dutch boats hit the beach in Table Bay. Just like in America, the colonists here had their way with the native women, as colonists so often do. Unlike in America, where anyone with one drop of black blood automatically became black, in South Africa, mixed people came to be classified as their own separate group. Neither black, nor white, but what we call colored. Colored people, black people, white people,"	"There were mixed kids in South Africa nine months after the first Dutch boats hit the beach in Table Bay. Just like in America, the colonists here had their way with the native women, as colonists so often do. Unlike in America, where anyone with one drop of black blood automatically became black, in South Africa, mixed people came to be classified as their own separate group. Neither black, nor white, but what we call colored. Colored people, black people, white people,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1190"	" They made everyone get out and they searched it. We were standing outside, lined up alongside the car. When one of the cops came back, we found a gun, he said. Whose gun is it? We all shrugged. We don't know, we said. Nope, somebody knows. It's somebody's gun. Officer, we really don't know, Bongani said. He slapped Bongani hard across the face. You're bullshitting me."	"They made everyone get out and they searched it. We were standing outside, lined up alongside the car. When one of the cops came back, we found a gun, he said. Whose gun is it? We all shrugged. We don't know, we said. Nope, somebody knows. It's somebody's gun. Officer, we really don't know, Bongani said. He slapped Bongani hard across the face. You're bullshitting me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1191"	" Then he went down the line, slapping each of us across the face, berating us about the gun. We couldn't do anything but stand there and take it. You guys are trash, the cop said. Where are you from? Alex. Oh, okay, I see. Dogs from Alex. You come here and you rob people and you rape women and you hijack cars, bunch of fucking hoodlumps. No, we're dancers."	"Then he went down the line, slapping each of us across the face, berating us about the gun. We couldn't do anything but stand there and take it. You guys are trash, the cop said. Where are you from? Alex. Oh, okay, I see. Dogs from Alex. You come here and you rob people and you rape women and you hijack cars, bunch of fucking hoodlumps. No, we're dancers."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1193"	" Can't we do something? You asked the officer. What do you want me to do? We're really sorry officer. What can we do? You tell me. Then you're supposed to make up a story whereby you indicate to the cop how much money you have on you, which we couldn't do because we didn't have any money. So he took us to jail. It was a public bus. It could have been anyone's gun. But the guys from Alex were the only ones who got arrested."	"Can't we do something? You asked the officer. What do you want me to do? We're really sorry officer. What can we do? You tell me. Then you're supposed to make up a story whereby you indicate to the cop how much money you have on you, which we couldn't do because we didn't have any money. So he took us to jail. It was a public bus. It could have been anyone's gun. But the guys from Alex were the only ones who got arrested."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1194"	" What are you doing with these crooks? I didn't know what to say."	"What are you doing with these crooks? I didn't know what to say."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1195"	" He glared at me hard. Listen here, rich boy. You think it's fun running around with these guys. This isn't play-play anymore. Just tell me the truth about your friends and the gun and I'll let you go."	"He glared at me hard. Listen here, rich boy. You think it's fun running around with these guys. This isn't play play anymore. Just tell me the truth about your friends and the gun and I'll let you go."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1196"	" I told him no, and he threw me back in the cell."	"I told him no, and he threw me back in the cell."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1198"	" And the next day I called a friend who said he could borrow the money from his dad to get us out. Later that day, the dad came down and paid the money. The cops kept calling it bail, but it was a bribe. We were never formally arrested or processed. There was no paperwork."	"And the next day I called a friend who said he could borrow the money from his dad to get us out. Later that day, the dad came down and paid the money. The cops kept calling it bail, but it was a bribe. We were never formally arrested or processed. There was no paperwork."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1199"	" We got out and everything was fine, but it rattled us. Every day we were out in the streets, hustling, trying to act as if we were in some way down with the gangs. But the truth was, we were always more cheese than hood. We had created this idea of ourselves as a defense mechanism to survive in the world we were living in. Bongani and the other East Bank guys, because of where they were from, what they looked like, they just had very little hope."	"We got out and everything was fine, but it rattled us. Every day we were out in the streets, hustling, trying to act as if we were in some way down with the gangs. But the truth was, we were always more cheese than hood. We had created this idea of ourselves as a defense mechanism to survive in the world we were living in. Bongani and the other East Bank guys, because of where they were from, what they looked like, they just had very little hope."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"12.1"	" The Zulu man is known as the warrior."	"The Zulu man is known as the warrior."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"12.2"	" He's proud."	"He's proud."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"12.4"	" When the colonial armies invaded, the Zulu charged into battle with nothing but spears and shields against men with guns."	"When the colonial armies invaded, the Zulu charged into battle with nothing but spears and shields against men with guns."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"12.5"	" The Zulu were slaughtered by the thousands, but they never stopped fighting."	"The Zulu were slaughtered by the thousands, but they never stopped fighting."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"120"	" Indian areas were segregated from colored areas, which were segregated from black areas. All of them segregated from white areas, and separated from one another by buffer zones of empty land."	"Indian areas were segregated from colored areas, which were segregated from black areas. All of them segregated from white areas, and separated from one another by buffer zones of empty land."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1200"	" Once, when I was 10 years old, visiting my dad in Yovil, I needed batteries for one of my toys. My mom had refused to buy me new batteries because, of course, she thought it was a waste of money. So I snuck out to the shops and shoplifted a pack. A security guard busted me on the way out, pulled me into his office and called my mom. We've caught your son shoplifting batteries, he said. You need to come and fetch him. No, she said. Take him to jail."	"Once, when I was  ten  years old, visiting my dad in Yovil, I needed batteries for one of my toys. My mom had refused to buy me new batteries because, of course, she thought it was a waste of money. So I snuck out to the shops and shoplifted a pack. A security guard busted me on the way out, pulled me into his office and called my mom. We've caught your son shoplifting batteries, he said. You need to come and fetch him. No, she said. Take him to jail."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1202"	" 17. The world doesn't love you."	" seventeen . The world doesn't love you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1203"	" My mom never gave me an inch. Any time I got in trouble, it was tough love, lectures, punishment, and hideings. Every time, for every infraction. You get that with a lot of black parents. They're trying to discipline you before the system does."	"My mom never gave me an inch. Any time I got in trouble, it was tough love, lectures, punishment, and hideings. Every time, for every infraction. You get that with a lot of black parents. They're trying to discipline you before the system does."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1204"	" I need to do this to you before the police do it to you. Because that's all black parents are thinking from the day you're old enough to walk out into the street where the law is waiting."	"I need to do this to you before the police do it to you. Because that's all black parents are thinking from the day you're old enough to walk out into the street where the law is waiting."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1205.01"	" In Alex, getting arrested was a fact of life."	"In Alex, getting arrested was a fact of life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1205.03"	" Everyone knew what that meant. Where's Bongani? Risclap. Oh shit, when? Friday night. Damn."	"Everyone knew what that meant. Where's Bongani? Risclap. Oh shit, when? Friday night. Damn."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1205.04"	" My mom hated the hood."	"My mom hated the hood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1205.05"	" She didn't like my friends there. If I brought them back to the house, she didn't even want them coming inside."	"She didn't like my friends there. If I brought them back to the house, she didn't even want them coming inside."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1205.06"	" I don't like those boys, she'd say."	"I don't like those boys, she'd say."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1205.08"	" You and those boys get into so much shit, she'd say."	"You and those boys get into so much shit, she'd say."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1205.09"	" You must be careful who you surround yourself with, because where you are can determine who you are."	"You must be careful who you surround yourself with, because where you are can determine who you are."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1205"	" In Alex, getting arrested was a fact of life. It was so common that out on the corner we had a sign for it, a shorthand. Clapping your wrists together like you were being put in handcuffs. Everyone knew what that meant. Where's Bongani? Wrist clap. Oh shit, when? Friday night. Damn. My mom hated the hood. She didn't like my friends there. If I brought them back to the house, she didn't even want them coming inside. I don't like those boys, she'd say. She didn't hate them personally."	"In Alex, getting arrested was a fact of life. It was so common that out on the corner we had a sign for it, a shorthand. Clapping your wrists together like you were being put in handcuffs. Everyone knew what that meant. Where's Bongani? Wrist clap. Oh shit, when? Friday night. Damn. My mom hated the hood. She didn't like my friends there. If I brought them back to the house, she didn't even want them coming inside. I don't like those boys, she'd say. She didn't hate them personally."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1206"	" She said the thing she hated most about the hood was that it didn't pressure me to become better. She wanted me to hang out with my cousin at his university."	"She said the thing she hated most about the hood was that it didn't pressure me to become better. She wanted me to hang out with my cousin at his university."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1208"	" I'd been stealing Abel's junkers to get around since I was 14. I would say I was test-driving them to make sure they'd been repaired correctly. Abel didn't think that was funny. I'd been caught many times, caught and subjected to my mother's wrath. But that had never stopped me from doing anything."	"I'd been stealing Abel's junkers to get around since I was  fourteen . I would say I was test driving them to make sure they'd been repaired correctly. Abel didn't think that was funny. I'd been caught many times, caught and subjected to my mother's wrath. But that had never stopped me from doing anything."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1209"	" Most of these junkers weren't street legal. They didn't have proper registrations or proper number plates. Luckily, Abel also had a stack of old number plates in the back of the garage. I quickly learned I could just put one on an old car and hit the road. I was 19, maybe 20, not thinking about any of the ramifications of this. I stopped by Abel's garage when no one was around, picked up one of the cars, the red Mazda are taken to the metric dance, slapped some old plates on it,"	"Most of these junkers weren't street legal. They didn't have proper registrations or proper number plates. Luckily, Abel also had a stack of old number plates in the back of the garage. I quickly learned I could just put one on an old car and hit the road. I was  nineteen , maybe  twenty , not thinking about any of the ramifications of this. I stopped by Abel's garage when no one was around, picked up one of the cars, the red Mazda are taken to the metric dance, slapped some old plates on it,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"121"	" Laws were passed prohibiting sex between Europeans and natives, laws that were later amended to prohibit sex between whites and all non-whites."	"Laws were passed prohibiting sex between Europeans and natives, laws that were later amended to prohibit sex between whites and all non whites."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1210"	" I got pulled over in Hillbrow. Cops in South Africa don't give you a reason when they pull you over. Cops pull you over because they're cops and they have the power to pull you over. It's as simple as that. I used to watch American movies where cops would pull people over and say, you didn't signal or your tail lights out. I'd always wonder, why do American cops bother lying? One thing I appreciate about South Africa is that we have not yet refined the system to the point where we feel the need"	"I got pulled over in Hillbrow. Cops in South Africa don't give you a reason when they pull you over. Cops pull you over because they're cops and they have the power to pull you over. It's as simple as that. I used to watch American movies where cops would pull people over and say, you didn't signal or your tail lights out. I'd always wonder, why do American cops bother lying? One thing I appreciate about South Africa is that we have not yet refined the system to the point where we feel the need."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1212"	" Your parents, on the other hand, are not rational at all. They have served as judge, jury, and executioner for your entire childhood, and it feels like they give you a life sentence for every misdemeanor. In that moment, when I should have been scared of the cop, all I was thinking was, shit, shit, shit, I am in so much trouble when I get home. The cop called in the number plate registration and discovered that it didn't match the car. Now, he was really on the way."	"Your parents, on the other hand, are not rational at all. They have served as judge, jury, and executioner for your entire childhood, and it feels like they give you a life sentence for every misdemeanor. In that moment, when I should have been scared of the cop, all I was thinking was, shit, shit, shit, I am in so much trouble when I get home. The cop called in the number plate registration and discovered that it didn't match the car. Now, he was really on the way."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1213"	" The Hillbrough Police Station looks exactly like every other police station in South Africa. They were all built by the same contractor at the height of apartheid. Separate nodes in the central nervous system of a police state. If you were blindfolded and taken from one to the other, you probably wouldn't even know that you changed locations. They're sterile, institutional, with fluorescent lights and cheap floor tile like a hospital. My cop walked me in and sat me down at the front booking desk."	"The Hillbrough Police Station looks exactly like every other police station in South Africa. They were all built by the same contractor at the height of apartheid. Separate nodes in the central nervous system of a police state. If you were blindfolded and taken from one to the other, you probably wouldn't even know that you changed locations. They're sterile, institutional, with fluorescent lights and cheap floor tile like a hospital. My cop walked me in and sat me down at the front booking desk."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1214"	" In the meantime, they'd been checking out the car, which wasn't going well for me either. Whenever I borrowed cars from Able's Workshop, I tried to take the junkers rather than a real client's car. I thought I'd get in less trouble that way. That was a mistake. The Mazda, being one of Able's Junkers, didn't have a clear title of ownership. If it had had an owner, the cops would have called the owner, the owner would have explained that the car had been dropped off for repairs,"	"In the meantime, they'd been checking out the car, which wasn't going well for me either. Whenever I borrowed cars from Able's Workshop, I tried to take the junkers rather than a real client's car. I thought I'd get in less trouble that way. That was a mistake. The Mazda, being one of Able's Junkers, didn't have a clear title of ownership. If it had had an owner, the cops would have called the owner, the owner would have explained that the car had been dropped off for repairs,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1215"	" Carjackings were common in South Africa at the time too. So common, you weren't even surprised when they happened. You'd have a friend coming over for a dinner party and you'd get a call. Sorry, got carjacked. Gonna be late. Ah, that sucks. Hey guys, Dave got carjacked. Oh, sorry, Dave. And the party would continue. And that's if the person survived the carjacking. Often, they didn't. People were getting shot for their cars all the time."	"Carjackings were common in South Africa at the time too. So common, you weren't even surprised when they happened. You'd have a friend coming over for a dinner party and you'd get a call. Sorry, got carjacked. Gonna be late. Ah, that sucks. Hey guys, Dave got carjacked. Oh, sorry, Dave. And the party would continue. And that's if the person survived the carjacking. Often, they didn't. People were getting shot for their cars all the time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1217"	" one call would have fixed everything."	"one call would have fixed everything."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1218"	" This is my stepfather. He's a mechanic. I borrowed his car when I shouldn't have. Done. At worst, I'd get a slap on the wrist for driving a car that wasn't registered. But what would I be getting at home?"	"This is my stepfather. He's a mechanic. I borrowed his car when I shouldn't have. Done. At worst, I'd get a slap on the wrist for driving a car that wasn't registered. But what would I be getting at home?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1219"	" I sat there in the police station, arrested for suspicion of grand theft auto, a plausible suspect for carjacking or murder, and debated whether I should call my parents or go to jail. With my stepfather I was thinking, he might actually kill me. In my mind, that was an entirely realistic scenario. With my mother I was thinking, she's going to make this worse. She's not the character witness I want right now. She won't help me."	"I sat there in the police station, arrested for suspicion of grand theft auto, a plausible suspect for carjacking or murder, and debated whether I should call my parents or go to jail. With my stepfather I was thinking, he might actually kill me. In my mind, that was an entirely realistic scenario. With my mother I was thinking, she's going to make this worse. She's not the character witness I want right now. She won't help me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"122"	" The government went to insane lengths to try to enforce these new laws. The penalty for breaking them was five years in prison. There were whole police squads whose only job was to go around peeking through windows. Clearly an assignment for only the finest law enforcement officers. And if an interracial couple got caught, God help them. The police would kick down the door, drag the people out, beat them, arrest them. At least, that's what they did to the black person. With the white person, it was more like"	"The government went to insane lengths to try to enforce these new laws. The penalty for breaking them was five years in prison. There were whole police squads whose only job was to go around peeking through windows. Clearly an assignment for only the finest law enforcement officers. And if an interracial couple got caught, God help them. The police would kick down the door, drag the people out, beat them, arrest them. At least, that's what they did to the black person. With the white person, it was more like."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1221"	" I used my call to phone my cousin and told him not to tell anyone what had happened while I figured out what to do. Now, I just had to figure out what to do."	"I used my call to phone my cousin and told him not to tell anyone what had happened while I figured out what to do. Now, I just had to figure out what to do."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1222"	" I'd been picked up late in the afternoon, so by the time I was processed, it was close to lights out. I was spending the night in jail, like it or not. It was at that point that a cop pulled me aside and told me what I was in for."	"I'd been picked up late in the afternoon, so by the time I was processed, it was close to lights out. I was spending the night in jail, like it or not. It was at that point that a cop pulled me aside and told me what I was in for."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1223"	" The way the system works in South Africa is that you're arrested and held in a cell at the police station until your bail hearing. At the hearing, the judge looks at your case, hears arguments from the opposing sides, and then he that dismisses the charges or sets bail and a trial date. If you can make bail, you pay and go home. But there are all sorts of ways your bail hearing can go wrong. You get some court-appointed lawyer who hasn't read your case and doesn't know what's going on."	"The way the system works in South Africa is that you're arrested and held in a cell at the police station until your bail hearing. At the hearing, the judge looks at your case, hears arguments from the opposing sides, and then he that dismisses the charges or sets bail and a trial date. If you can make bail, you pay and go home. But there are all sorts of ways your bail hearing can go wrong. You get some court appointed lawyer who hasn't read your case and doesn't know what's going on."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1224"	" In prison, you're housed with the people awaiting trial, not with the general population. But even the awaiting trial section is incredibly dangerous because you have people picked up for traffic violations all the way up to proper hardened criminals. You're stuck there together. And you can be there for days, weeks, maybe months. It's the same way in America. If you're poor, if you don't know how the system works, you can slip through the cracks. And the next thing you know, you're in this"	"In prison, you're housed with the people awaiting trial, not with the general population. But even the awaiting trial section is incredibly dangerous because you have people picked up for traffic violations all the way up to proper hardened criminals. You're stuck there together. And you can be there for days, weeks, maybe months. It's the same way in America. If you're poor, if you don't know how the system works, you can slip through the cracks. And the next thing you know, you're in this."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1226"	" He wasn't giving me this advice out of the goodness of his heart. He had a deal with a defense attorney, sending him clients in exchange for a kickback. He handed me the attorney's business card. I called him, and he agreed to take my case. He told me to stay put while he handled everything."	"He wasn't giving me this advice out of the goodness of his heart. He had a deal with a defense attorney, sending him clients in exchange for a kickback. He handed me the attorney's business card. I called him, and he agreed to take my case. He told me to stay put while he handled everything."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1227"	" Now, I needed money. Because lawyers, as nice as they are, don't do anything for free."	"Now, I needed money. Because lawyers, as nice as they are, don't do anything for free."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1228"	" I called a friend and asked him if he could ask his dad to borrow some money. He said he'd handle it. He talked to his dad and the lawyer got his retainer the next day."	"I called a friend and asked him if he could ask his dad to borrow some money. He said he'd handle it. He talked to his dad and the lawyer got his retainer the next day."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1229"	" With the lawyer taken care of, I felt like I had things under control. I was feeling pretty slick. I'd handled the situation and most important, Mom and Abel were none the wiser."	"With the lawyer taken care of, I felt like I had things under control. I was feeling pretty slick. I'd handled the situation and most important, Mom and Abel were none the wiser."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1230"	" When the time came for lights out, a cop came and took my stuff. My belt, my wallet, my shoelaces. Why do you need my shoelaces? So you don't hang yourself."	"When the time came for lights out, a cop came and took my stuff. My belt, my wallet, my shoelaces. Why do you need my shoelaces? So you don't hang yourself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1231"	" Right. Even when he said that, the gravity of my situation still wasn't sinking in. Walking to the station's holding cell, looking around at the other six guys in there, I was thinking, this is no big deal. Everything's going to be cool. I'm going to get out of this."	"Right. Even when he said that, the gravity of my situation still wasn't sinking in. Walking to the station's holding cell, looking around at the other six guys in there, I was thinking, this is no big deal. Everything's going to be cool. I'm going to get out of this."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1232"	" I thought that, right up until the moment the cell door clanged shut behind me and the guard yelled, lights out! That's when I thought, oh shit, this is real."	"I thought that, right up until the moment the cell door clanged shut behind me and the guard yelled, lights out! That's when I thought, oh shit, this is real."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1233"	" The guards had given me a mat and a scratchy blanket. I rolled them out on the concrete floor and tried to get comfortable. Every bad prison movie I'd ever seen was racing through my head."	"The guards had given me a mat and a scratchy blanket. I rolled them out on the concrete floor and tried to get comfortable. Every bad prison movie I'd ever seen was racing through my head."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1235"	" I woke up the next morning with that fleeting sensation where you think something has all been a dream. Then I looked around and remembered that it wasn't. Breakfast came and I settled in to wait."	"I woke up the next morning with that fleeting sensation where you think something has all been a dream. Then I looked around and remembered that it wasn't. Breakfast came and I settled in to wait."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1236"	" A day in jail is mostly silence punctuated by passing guards shouting profanities at you, doing roll call. Inside the holding cell, nobody says anything. Nobody walks into a jail cell and says, hi guys, I'm Brian."	"A day in jail is mostly silence punctuated by passing guards shouting profanities at you, doing roll call. Inside the holding cell, nobody says anything. Nobody walks into a jail cell and says, hi guys, I'm Brian."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1237"	" Because everyone is afraid and no one wants to appear vulnerable. Nobody wants to be the bitch. Nobody wants to be the guy getting killed. I didn't want anyone to know that I was just a kid in for a traffic charge. So I reached back in my mind for all the stereotypes of what I imagined people act like in prison. And then I tried to act like that."	"Because everyone is afraid and no one wants to appear vulnerable. Nobody wants to be the bitch. Nobody wants to be the guy getting killed. I didn't want anyone to know that I was just a kid in for a traffic charge. So I reached back in my mind for all the stereotypes of what I imagined people act like in prison. And then I tried to act like that."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1238"	" In South Africa, everyone knows that coloured gangsters are the most ruthless, the most savage. It's a stereotype that's fed to you your whole life. The most notorious coloured gangs are the numbers gangs, the 26s, the 27s, the 28s. They control the prisons. They are known for being brutally violent, maiming, torturing, raping, cutting off people's heads. Not for the sake of making money, but just to prove how ruthless and savage they are."	"In South Africa, everyone knows that coloured gangsters are the most ruthless, the most savage. It's a stereotype that's fed to you your whole life. The most notorious coloured gangs are the numbers gangs, the  twenty six s, the  twenty seven s, the  twenty eight s. They control the prisons. They are known for being brutally violent, maiming, torturing, raping, cutting off people's heads. Not for the sake of making money, but just to prove how ruthless and savage they are."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"124"	" If you stop to consider the ramifications, you'll never do anything. Still, it was a crazy, reckless thing to do. A million things had to go right for us to slip through the cracks the way we did for as long as we did."	"If you stop to consider the ramifications, you'll never do anything. Still, it was a crazy, reckless thing to do. A million things had to go right for us to slip through the cracks the way we did for as long as we did."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.001"	" I figured that if I was in jail, people were going to assume I was the kind of colored person who ends up in jail."	"I figured that if I was in jail, people were going to assume I was the kind of colored person who ends up in jail."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.002"	" a violent criminal. So I played it up."	"a violent criminal. So I played it up."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.003"	" I put on this character. I played the stereotype."	"I put on this character. I played the stereotype."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.005"	" Imagine a white guy in America, just dark enough to pass for Latino, walking around jail doing bad Mexican gangster dialogue from the movies."	"Imagine a white guy in America, just dark enough to pass for Latino, walking around jail doing bad Mexican gangster dialogue from the movies."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.006"	" Shit's about to get loco essay."	"Shit's about to get loco essay."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.007"	" That's basically what I was doing."	"That's basically what I was doing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.008"	" the South African version of that."	"the South African version of that."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.010"	" But it worked."	"But it worked."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.011"	" The guys in the cell with me, they were there for drunk driving, for domestic abuse, for petty theft. They had no idea what real colored gangsters were like."	"The guys in the cell with me, they were there for drunk driving, for domestic abuse, for petty theft. They had no idea what real colored gangsters were like."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.012"	" Everyone left me alone."	"Everyone left me alone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.013"	" We were all playing a game. Only nobody knew we were playing it."	"We were all playing a game. Only nobody knew we were playing it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.015"	" I'm dangerous. Don't fuck with me."	"I'm dangerous. Don't fuck with me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.016"	" So I went shits."	"So I went shits."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.017"	" These people are hardened criminals."	"These people are hardened criminals."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.018"	" I shouldn't be here because I am not a criminal."	"I shouldn't be here because I am not a criminal."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.020"	" One by one, guys left to go to their hearings. I stayed to wait for my lawyer, and new people started to pitch up. Now, I was the veteran."	"One by one, guys left to go to their hearings. I stayed to wait for my lawyer, and new people started to pitch up. Now, I was the veteran."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.021"	" Doing my colored gangster routine giving the new guys the same look. I'm dangerous Don't fuck with me"	"Doing my colored gangster routine giving the new guys the same look. I'm dangerous Don't fuck with me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240.022"	" And they looked at me and went, shit, he's a hardened criminal. I shouldn't be here because I'm not like him."	"And they looked at me and went, shit, he's a hardened criminal. I shouldn't be here because I'm not like him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1240"	" I figured that if I was in jail, people were going to assume I was the kind of colored person who ends up in jail. A violent criminal. So I played it up. I put on this character. I played the stereotype. Anytime the cops asked me questions, I started speaking in broken off recants with a thick colored accent. Imagine a white guy in America, just dark enough to pass for Latino, walking around jail, doing bad Mexican gangster dialogue from the movies."	"I figured that if I was in jail, people were going to assume I was the kind of colored person who ends up in jail. A violent criminal. So I played it up. I put on this character. I played the stereotype. Anytime the cops asked me questions, I started speaking in broken off recants with a thick colored accent. Imagine a white guy in America, just dark enough to pass for Latino, walking around jail, doing bad Mexican gangster dialogue from the movies."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1242"	" Once I had the game sorted out, I was good again. I relaxed. I was back to thinking, I got this. This is no big deal. The food was actually decent. For breakfast, they brought you these peanut butter sandwiches on thick slices of bread. Lunch was chicken and rice. The tea was too hot and it was more water than tea, but it was drinkable. They were older, hard-time prisoners close to parole and their detail was to come and clean the cells and circulate"	"Once I had the game sorted out, I was good again. I relaxed. I was back to thinking, I got this. This is no big deal. The food was actually decent. For breakfast, they brought you these peanut butter sandwiches on thick slices of bread. Lunch was chicken and rice. The tea was too hot and it was more water than tea, but it was drinkable. They were older, hard time prisoners close to parole and their detail was to come and clean the cells and circulate."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1243"	" There was one point when I remember eating a meal and saying to myself, this isn't so bad. I hang around with a bunch of dudes. There's no chores, no bills to pay. No one constantly nagging me and telling me what to do. Peanut butter sandwiches? Shit, I eat peanut butter sandwiches all the time. This is pretty sweet. I could do this. I was so afraid of the ass whooping waiting for me at home that I genuinely considered going to prison. For a brief moment,"	"There was one point when I remember eating a meal and saying to myself, this isn't so bad. I hang around with a bunch of dudes. There's no chores, no bills to pay. No one constantly nagging me and telling me what to do. Peanut butter sandwiches? Shit, I eat peanut butter sandwiches all the time. This is pretty sweet. I could do this. I was so afraid of the ass whooping waiting for me at home that I genuinely considered going to prison. For a brief moment,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1244"	" I'll go away for a couple of years, come back and say I was kidnapped and mom will never know and she'll just be happy to see me."	"I'll go away for a couple of years, come back and say I was kidnapped and mom will never know and she'll just be happy to see me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1245"	" On the third day, the cops brought in the largest man I had ever seen. This guy was huge. Giant muscles, dark skin, hardened face. He looked like he could kill all of us. Me and the other prisoners who'd been acting tough with one another, the second he walked in, our tough guy routines were over. Everyone was terrified. We all stared at him. Oh, fuck."	"On the third day, the cops brought in the largest man I had ever seen. This guy was huge. Giant muscles, dark skin, hardened face. He looked like he could kill all of us. Me and the other prisoners who'd been acting tough with one another, the second he walked in, our tough guy routines were over. Everyone was terrified. We all stared at him. Oh, fuck."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1247"	" Then one of the cops came back and called the Hulk over. They needed information from him. The cop started asking him a bunch of questions, but the guy kept shaking his head and saying he didn't understand. The cop was speaking Zulu. The Hulk was speaking Zonga. Black person to black person and neither could understand the other. The Tower of Babel."	"Then one of the cops came back and called the Hulk over. They needed information from him. The cop started asking him a bunch of questions, but the guy kept shaking his head and saying he didn't understand. The cop was speaking Zulu. The Hulk was speaking Zonga. Black person to black person and neither could understand the other. The Tower of Babel."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1248"	" Few people in South Africa speak Zonga, but since my stepfather was Zonga, I had picked it up along the way. I overheard the cop and the other guy going back and forth with nothing getting across, so I stepped in and translated for them and sorted everything out."	"Few people in South Africa speak Zonga, but since my stepfather was Zonga, I had picked it up along the way. I overheard the cop and the other guy going back and forth with nothing getting across, so I stepped in and translated for them and sorted everything out."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1249"	" Nelson Mandela once said, if you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. He was so right. When you make the effort to speak someone else's language, even if it's just basic phrases here and there, you are saying to them, I understand that you have a culture and identity that exists beyond me. I see you as a human being."	"Nelson Mandela once said, if you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. He was so right. When you make the effort to speak someone else's language, even if it's just basic phrases here and there, you are saying to them, I understand that you have a culture and identity that exists beyond me. I see you as a human being."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"125"	" Under apartheid, if you were a black man, you worked on a farm, or in a factory, or in a mine. If you were a black woman, you worked in a factory, or as a maid. Those were pretty much your only options. My mother didn't want to work in a factory. She was a horrible cook and never would have stood for some white lady telling her what to do all day."	"Under apartheid, if you were a black man, you worked on a farm, or in a factory, or in a mine. If you were a black woman, you worked in a factory, or as a maid. Those were pretty much your only options. My mother didn't want to work in a factory. She was a horrible cook and never would have stood for some white lady telling her what to do all day."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1251"	" Once we started talking, I realized he wasn't the Hulk at all. He was the sweetest man, a gentle giant, the biggest teddy bear in the world. He was simple, not educated. I'd assumed he was in for murder, for squashing a family to death with his bare hands, but it wasn't anything like that. He'd been arrested for shoplifting PlayStation games. He was out of work and needed money to send to his family back home. And when he saw how much these games sold for, he thought he could steal a few"	"Once we started talking, I realized he wasn't the Hulk at all. He was the sweetest man, a gentle giant, the biggest teddy bear in the world. He was simple, not educated. I'd assumed he was in for murder, for squashing a family to death with his bare hands, but it wasn't anything like that. He'd been arrested for shoplifting PlayStation games. He was out of work and needed money to send to his family back home. And when he saw how much these games sold for, he thought he could steal a few."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1252"	" I tried to help him out a bit. I told him my trick of putting off your bail hearing to get your defense together. So he stayed in the cell too, biding his time. And we hit it off and hung out for a few days, having a good time, getting to know each other. No one else in the cell knew what to make of us. The ruthless, colored gangster and his menacing, hulk-like friend."	"I tried to help him out a bit. I told him my trick of putting off your bail hearing to get your defense together. So he stayed in the cell too, biding his time. And we hit it off and hung out for a few days, having a good time, getting to know each other. No one else in the cell knew what to make of us. The ruthless, colored gangster and his menacing, hulk like friend."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1253"	" He told me his story, a South African story that was all too familiar to me."	"He told me his story, a South African story that was all too familiar to me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1254"	" The man grows up under apartheid, working on a farm, part of what's essentially a slave labour force. It's a living hell, but it's at least something. He's paid a pittance, but at least he's paid. He's told where to be and what to do every waking minute of his day."	"The man grows up under apartheid, working on a farm, part of what's essentially a slave labour force. It's a living hell, but it's at least something. He's paid a pittance, but at least he's paid. He's told where to be and what to do every waking minute of his day."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1256"	" He finds his way to Johannesburg, looking for work, trying to feed his children back home. But he's lost. He has no education. He has no skills. He doesn't know what to do. Doesn't know where to be. The world has been taught to be scared of him. But the reality is that he's scared of the world because he has none of the tools necessary to cope with it. So what does he do? He takes shit. He becomes a petty thief. He's in and out of jail."	"He finds his way to Johannesburg, looking for work, trying to feed his children back home. But he's lost. He has no education. He has no skills. He doesn't know what to do. Doesn't know where to be. The world has been taught to be scared of him. But the reality is that he's scared of the world because he has none of the tools necessary to cope with it. So what does he do? He takes shit. He becomes a petty thief. He's in and out of jail."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1257"	" I felt terrible for him. The more time I spent in jail, the more I realized that the law isn't rational at all. It's a lottery. What color is your skin? How much money do you have? Who's your lawyer? Who's the judge? Shoplifting PlayStation games was less of an offense than driving with bad number plates. He had committed a crime, but he was no more a criminal than I was. The difference was that he didn't have any friends or family to help him out. He couldn't afford anything"	"I felt terrible for him. The more time I spent in jail, the more I realized that the law isn't rational at all. It's a lottery. What color is your skin? How much money do you have? Who's your lawyer? Who's the judge? Shoplifting PlayStation games was less of an offense than driving with bad number plates. He had committed a crime, but he was no more a criminal than I was. The difference was that he didn't have any friends or family to help him out. He couldn't afford anything."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1258"	" If I had to guess, he was around 35, 40 years old, staring down another 35, 40 years of the same."	"If I had to guess, he was around  thirty five ,  forty  years old, staring down another  thirty five ,  forty  years of the same."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1259"	" The day of my hearing came. I said goodbye to my new friend and wished him the best. Then I was handcuffed and put in the back of a police van and driven to the courthouse to meet my fate."	"The day of my hearing came. I said goodbye to my new friend and wished him the best. Then I was handcuffed and put in the back of a police van and driven to the courthouse to meet my fate."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1260"	" In South African courts, to minimize your exposure and your opportunities for escape, the holding cell where you await your hearing is a massive pen below the courtroom."	"In South African courts, to minimize your exposure and your opportunities for escape, the holding cell where you await your hearing is a massive pen below the courtroom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1261"	" you walk up a set of stairs, into the dock, rather than being escorted through the corridors. What happens in the holding cell is you're mixed in with the people who've been in prison awaiting trial for weeks and months. It's a weird mix. Everything from white-collar criminals to guys picked up on traffic stops, to real hardcore criminals covered with prison tattoos. It's like the cantina scene from Star Wars, where the band's playing music and Hans Solo's in the corner, and all of the bad guys"	"you walk up a set of stairs, into the dock, rather than being escorted through the corridors. What happens in the holding cell is you're mixed in with the people who've been in prison awaiting trial for weeks and months. It's a weird mix. Everything from white collar criminals to guys picked up on traffic stops, to real hardcore criminals covered with prison tattoos. It's like the cantina scene from Star Wars, where the band's playing music and Hans Solo's in the corner, and all of the bad guys."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1262"	" I was with these people for only a brief window of time. But in that moment, I saw the difference between prison and jail. I saw the difference between criminals and people who've committed crimes. I saw the hardness in people's faces. I thought back on how naive I'd been just hours before, thinking jail wasn't so bad and I could handle it. I was now truly afraid of what might happen to me."	"I was with these people for only a brief window of time. But in that moment, I saw the difference between prison and jail. I saw the difference between criminals and people who've committed crimes. I saw the hardness in people's faces. I thought back on how naive I'd been just hours before, thinking jail wasn't so bad and I could handle it. I was now truly afraid of what might happen to me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1263"	" When I walked into that holding pen, I was a smooth-skinned, fresh-faced young man. At the time, I had a giant afro, and the only way to control it was to have it tied back in this ponytail thing that looked really girly. I looked like Maxwell. The guards closed the door behind me, and this creepy old dude yelled out in Zulu from the back. Ha ha ha! Here, my daughter!"	"When I walked into that holding pen, I was a smooth skinned, fresh faced young man. At the time, I had a giant afro, and the only way to control it was to have it tied back in this ponytail thing that looked really girly. I looked like Maxwell. The guards closed the door behind me, and this creepy old dude yelled out in Zulu from the back. Ha ha ha! Here, my daughter!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1265"	" Yo, yo, yo, damn guys. I've never seen a man this beautiful before. It's gonna be a good night tonight. Fuck! Right next to me as I walked in was a young man having a complete meltdown, talking to himself, bawling his eyes out. He looked up and locked eyes with me, and I guess he thought I looked like a kindred soul he could talk to. He came straight at me and started crying about how he'd been"	"Yo, yo, yo, damn guys. I've never seen a man this beautiful before. It's gonna be a good night tonight. Fuck! Right next to me as I walked in was a young man having a complete meltdown, talking to himself, bawling his eyes out. He looked up and locked eyes with me, and I guess he thought I looked like a kindred soul he could talk to. He came straight at me and started crying about how he'd been."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1266"	" I was staring at the most notorious, most violent prison gang in South Africa. I looked like them, but I wasn't them. I couldn't go over there doing my fake gangster shit and have them discover I was a fraud. No, no, no. That game was over, my friend. The last thing I needed was colored gangsters up against me."	"I was staring at the most notorious, most violent prison gang in South Africa. I looked like them, but I wasn't them. I couldn't go over there doing my fake gangster shit and have them discover I was a fraud. No, no, no. That game was over, my friend. The last thing I needed was colored gangsters up against me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1267"	" But then, what if I went to the black corner? I know that I'm black, and I identify as black, but I'm not a black person on the face of it. So would the black guys understand why I was walking over? And what kind of shit would I start by going there? Because going to the black corner as a perceived colored person might piss off the colored gangs even more than going to the colored corner as a fake colored person. Because that's what had happened to me my entire life. Colored people would see me hanging out with blacks"	"But then, what if I went to the black corner? I know that I'm black, and I identify as black, but I'm not a black person on the face of it. So would the black guys understand why I was walking over? And what kind of shit would I start by going there? Because going to the black corner as a perceived colored person might piss off the colored gangs even more than going to the colored corner as a fake colored person. Because that's what had happened to me my entire life. Colored people would see me hanging out with blacks."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1268"	" All of this was happening in my head in an instant, on the fly. I was doing crazy calculations, looking at people, scanning the room, assessing the variables. If I go here, then this. If I go there, then that. My whole life was flashing before me. The playground at school, the spazza shops in Soweto, the streets of Eden Park. Every time and every place I ever had to be a chameleon, navigate between groups, explain who I was."	"All of this was happening in my head in an instant, on the fly. I was doing crazy calculations, looking at people, scanning the room, assessing the variables. If I go here, then this. If I go there, then that. My whole life was flashing before me. The playground at school, the spazza shops in Soweto, the streets of Eden Park. Every time and every place I ever had to be a chameleon, navigate between groups, explain who I was."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"127"	" By law, white collar jobs and skilled labor jobs were reserved for whites. Black people didn't work in offices. My mom, however, was a rebel. And fortunately for her, her rebellion came along at the right moment."	"By law, white collar jobs and skilled labor jobs were reserved for whites. Black people didn't work in offices. My mom, however, was a rebel. And fortunately for her, her rebellion came along at the right moment."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1270"	" Luckily, the time went by fairly quickly. I was in there for only an hour before I was called up to court, where a judge would either let me go or send me to prison to await trial."	"Luckily, the time went by fairly quickly. I was in there for only an hour before I was called up to court, where a judge would either let me go or send me to prison to await trial."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1271"	" As I was leaving, one of the white guys reached over to me. Make sure you don't come back down here, he said. Cry in front of the judge. Do whatever you have to do. If you go up and get sent back down here, your life will never be the same."	"As I was leaving, one of the white guys reached over to me. Make sure you don't come back down here, he said. Cry in front of the judge. Do whatever you have to do. If you go up and get sent back down here, your life will never be the same."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1272"	" Up in the courtroom, I found my lawyer waiting. My cousin Mlungisi was there too in the gallery, ready to post my bail if things went my way."	"Up in the courtroom, I found my lawyer waiting. My cousin Mlungisi was there too in the gallery, ready to post my bail if things went my way."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1274"	" the whole courtroom started laughing. So then I started laughing too. But now I was even more petrified because I didn't want the judge to think I wasn't taking him seriously because I was laughing."	"the whole courtroom started laughing. So then I started laughing too. But now I was even more petrified because I didn't want the judge to think I wasn't taking him seriously because I was laughing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1275"	" It turned out that I needn't have been worried."	"It turned out that I needn't have been worried."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1276"	" Everything that happened next took only a few minutes. My lawyer had talked to the prosecutor and everything had been arranged beforehand. He presented my case. I had no priors. I wasn't dangerous. There were no objections from the opposing side. The judge assigned my trial date and set my bail and I was free to go."	"Everything that happened next took only a few minutes. My lawyer had talked to the prosecutor and everything had been arranged beforehand. He presented my case. I had no priors. I wasn't dangerous. There were no objections from the opposing side. The judge assigned my trial date and set my bail and I was free to go."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1277"	" I walked out of court and the lights of day hit my face and I said, Sweet Jesus, I am never going back there again. It had been only a week in a cell that wasn't terribly uncomfortable with food that wasn't half bad, but a week in jail is a long, long time. A week without shoelaces is a long, long time. A week with no clocks, with no sun, can feel like an eternity."	"I walked out of court and the lights of day hit my face and I said, Sweet Jesus, I am never going back there again. It had been only a week in a cell that wasn't terribly uncomfortable with food that wasn't half bad, but a week in jail is a long, long time. A week without shoelaces is a long, long time. A week with no clocks, with no sun, can feel like an eternity."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1279"	" I drove with Mlungisi to his place, took a shower and slept there. The next day, he dropped me back at my mom's house. I strolled up the driveway, acting real casual. My plan was to say I'd been crashing with Mlungisi for a few days. I walked into the house like nothing had happened. Hey, Mom, what's up?"	"I drove with Mlungisi to his place, took a shower and slept there. The next day, he dropped me back at my mom's house. I strolled up the driveway, acting real casual. My plan was to say I'd been crashing with Mlungisi for a few days. I walked into the house like nothing had happened. Hey, Mom, what's up?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"128"	" In the early 1980s, the South African government began making minor reforms in an attempt to quell international protest over the atrocities and human rights abuses of apartheid. Among those reforms was the token hiring of black workers in low-level white-collar jobs, like typists. Through an employment agency, she got a job as a secretary at ICI, a multinational pharmaceutical company in Bromfontaine, a suburb of Johannesburg."	"In the early  one thousand, nine hundred and eighty s, the South African government began making minor reforms in an attempt to quell international protest over the atrocities and human rights abuses of apartheid. Among those reforms was the token hiring of black workers in low level white collar jobs, like typists. Through an employment agency, she got a job as a secretary at ICI, a multinational pharmaceutical company in Bromfontaine, a suburb of Johannesburg."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1280"	" Mom didn't say anything, didn't ask me any questions. I was like, okay, cool, we're good."	"Mom didn't say anything, didn't ask me any questions. I was like, okay, cool, we're good."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1281"	" I stayed for most of the day. Later in the afternoon, we were sitting at the kitchen table talking. I was telling all these stories, going on about everything Lungi Sih and I had been up to that week. And I caught my mom giving me this look, slowly shaking her head. It was a different look than I had ever seen her give before. It wasn't, one day I'm going to catch you. It wasn't anger or disapproval. It was disappointment. She was hurt. What? I said. What is it?"	"I stayed for most of the day. Later in the afternoon, we were sitting at the kitchen table talking. I was telling all these stories, going on about everything Lungi Sih and I had been up to that week. And I caught my mom giving me this look, slowly shaking her head. It was a different look than I had ever seen her give before. It wasn't, one day I'm going to catch you. It wasn't anger or disapproval. It was disappointment. She was hurt. What? I said. What is it?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1283"	" Do you think I'm an idiot? Did you think no one would tell me?"	"Do you think I'm an idiot? Did you think no one would tell me?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1284"	" The truth came spilling out. Of course she'd known. The car. It had been missing the whole time."	"The truth came spilling out. Of course she'd known. The car. It had been missing the whole time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1285"	" I'd been so wrapped up in dealing with jail and covering my tracks, I'd forgotten that the proof of my crime was right there in the yard. The red Mazda missing from the driveway. And of course when I called my friend and he'd asked his dad for money for the lawyer, the dad had pressed him on what the money was for. And being a parent himself, had called my mother immediately. She'd given my friend the money to pay the lawyer. She'd given my cousin the money to pay my bail. I'd spend the whole week in jail,"	"I'd been so wrapped up in dealing with jail and covering my tracks, I'd forgotten that the proof of my crime was right there in the yard. The red Mazda missing from the driveway. And of course when I called my friend and he'd asked his dad for money for the lawyer, the dad had pressed him on what the money was for. And being a parent himself, had called my mother immediately. She'd given my friend the money to pay the lawyer. She'd given my cousin the money to pay my bail. I'd spend the whole week in jail,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1286"	" I know you see me as some crazy old bitch nagging at you, she said. But you forget the reason I ride you so hard and give you so much shit is because I love you. Everything I've ever done, I've done from a place of love."	"I know you see me as some crazy old bitch nagging at you, she said. But you forget the reason I ride you so hard and give you so much shit is because I love you. Everything I've ever done, I've done from a place of love."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1288"	" When they beat you, they're trying to kill you."	"When they beat you, they're trying to kill you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1289"	" My favorite thing to eat as a kid, and still my favorite dessert of all time, was custard and jelly. What Americans call Jell-O. One Saturday, my mom was planning for a big family celebration and she made a huge bowl of custard and jelly and put it in the fridge. It had every flavor. Red, green, and yellow. I couldn't resist it. That whole day, every time I walked past the fridge, I'd pop my head in with a spoon and sneak a bite."	"My favorite thing to eat as a kid, and still my favorite dessert of all time, was custard and jelly. What Americans call Jell O. One Saturday, my mom was planning for a big family celebration and she made a huge bowl of custard and jelly and put it in the fridge. It had every flavor. Red, green, and yellow. I couldn't resist it. That whole day, every time I walked past the fridge, I'd pop my head in with a spoon and sneak a bite."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"129"	" When my mom started working, she still lived with my grandmother in Soweto, the township where the government had relocated my family decades before."	"When my mom started working, she still lived with my grandmother in Soweto, the township where the government had relocated my family decades before."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1290"	" That night, I went to bed and got absolutely butchered by mosquitoes. Mosquitoes love to feast on me, and when I was a kid, it was bad. They would destroy me at night. I would wake up, covered with bites, and feel ill to my stomach and itchy all over, which was exactly what happened this particular Sunday morning. Covered with mosquito bites, my stomach bloated with custard and jelly, I could barely get out of bed. I felt like I was going to vomit. Then,"	"That night, I went to bed and got absolutely butchered by mosquitoes. Mosquitoes love to feast on me, and when I was a kid, it was bad. They would destroy me at night. I would wake up, covered with bites, and feel ill to my stomach and itchy all over, which was exactly what happened this particular Sunday morning. Covered with mosquito bites, my stomach bloated with custard and jelly, I could barely get out of bed. I felt like I was going to vomit. Then,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1292"	" Like all of our debates about Jesus, this conversation went nowhere. Trevor, she said, if you don't go to church, you're going to get worse. You're lucky you got sick on a Sunday because now we're going to church and you can pray to Jesus and Jesus is going to heal you. That sounds nice, but why don't I just stay home? No, get dressed. We're going to church."	"Like all of our debates about Jesus, this conversation went nowhere. Trevor, she said, if you don't go to church, you're going to get worse. You're lucky you got sick on a Sunday because now we're going to church and you can pray to Jesus and Jesus is going to heal you. That sounds nice, but why don't I just stay home? No, get dressed. We're going to church."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1293"	" 18. My mother's life."	" eighteen . My mother's life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1294"	" Once I had my hair cornrowed for the metric dance, I started getting attention from girls for the first time. I actually went on dates. At times, I thought that it was because I looked better. At other times, I thought it was because girls liked the fact that I was going through as much pain as they did to look good. Either way, once I found success, I wasn't going to mess with the formula. I kept going back to the salon every week, spending hours at a time getting my hair straightened and cornrowed."	"Once I had my hair cornrowed for the metric dance, I started getting attention from girls for the first time. I actually went on dates. At times, I thought that it was because I looked better. At other times, I thought it was because girls liked the fact that I was going through as much pain as they did to look good. Either way, once I found success, I wasn't going to mess with the formula. I kept going back to the salon every week, spending hours at a time getting my hair straightened and cornrowed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1295"	" Monday through Saturday, my mom worked in her office and putted around her garden dressed like a homeless person. Then, Sunday morning for church, she'd do her hair and put on a nice dress and some high heels, and she looked like a million bucks. Once she was all done up, she couldn't resist teasing me, throwing little verbal jabs the way we'd always do with each other. Now, who's the best looking person in the family, eh? I hope you enjoyed your week of being the pretty one, cause the queen is back"	"Monday through Saturday, my mom worked in her office and putted around her garden dressed like a homeless person. Then, Sunday morning for church, she'd do her hair and put on a nice dress and some high heels, and she looked like a million bucks. Once she was all done up, she couldn't resist teasing me, throwing little verbal jabs the way we'd always do with each other. Now, who's the best looking person in the family, eh? I hope you enjoyed your week of being the pretty one, cause the queen is back."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1297"	" Right around the corner from my father's house in Jovl, there was a garage called Mighty Mechanics. Our Volkswagen was always breaking down and my mom would take it there to get repaired. We met this really cool guy there, Abel, one of the auto mechanics. I would see him when we went to fetch the car. The car broke down a lot, so we were there a lot. Eventually, it felt like we were there even when there was nothing wrong with the vehicle. I was six, maybe seven."	"Right around the corner from my father's house in Jovl, there was a garage called Mighty Mechanics. Our Volkswagen was always breaking down and my mom would take it there to get repaired. We met this really cool guy there, Abel, one of the auto mechanics. I would see him when we went to fetch the car. The car broke down a lot, so we were there a lot. Eventually, it felt like we were there even when there was nothing wrong with the vehicle. I was six, maybe seven."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1298"	" I liked him too."	"I liked him too."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1299"	" Because if you think someone is a monster and the whole world says he's a saint, you begin to think that you're the bad person."	"Because if you think someone is a monster and the whole world says he's a saint, you begin to think that you're the bad person."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"13.1"	" The possa on the other hand..."	"The possa on the other hand..."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"13.3"	" My mother is Tossa."	"My mother is Tossa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"13.4"	" Nelson Mandela was Pasa."	"Nelson Mandela was Pasa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"13.5"	" The Posa waged a long war against the white man as well. But after experiencing the futility of battle against a better armed foe, many Posa chiefs took a more nimble approach."	"The Posa waged a long war against the white man as well. But after experiencing the futility of battle against a better armed foe, many Posa chiefs took a more nimble approach."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"13.6"	" These white people are here whether we like it or not, they said."	"These white people are here whether we like it or not, they said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"13.8"	" Instead of being resistant to English, let us learn English."	"Instead of being resistant to English, let us learn English."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"13.9"	" We'll understand what the white man is saying and we can force him to negotiate with us."	"We'll understand what the white man is saying and we can force him to negotiate with us."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"130"	" But my mother was unhappy at home, and when she was 22, she ran away to live in downtown Johannesburg."	"But my mother was unhappy at home, and when she was  twenty two , she ran away to live in downtown Johannesburg."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1300"	" It must be my fault. This is happening. It's the only conclusion you can draw, because why are you the only one receiving his wrath?"	"It must be my fault. This is happening. It's the only conclusion you can draw, because why are you the only one receiving his wrath?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1302"	" One night, my mom and I were at a prayer meeting and she took me aside. Hey, she said, I want to tell you something."	"One night, my mom and I were at a prayer meeting and she took me aside. Hey, she said, I want to tell you something."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1303"	" Abel and I are going to get married. Instinctively, without even asking, I said, I don't think that's a good idea. I wasn't upset or anything. I just had a sense about the guy. An intuition. I'd felt it even before the mulberry tree. That night hadn't changed my feelings towards Abel. It had only shown me, in flesh and blood, what he was capable of."	"Abel and I are going to get married. Instinctively, without even asking, I said, I don't think that's a good idea. I wasn't upset or anything. I just had a sense about the guy. An intuition. I'd felt it even before the mulberry tree. That night hadn't changed my feelings towards Abel. It had only shown me, in flesh and blood, what he was capable of."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1304"	" I understand that it's hard, she said. I understand that you don't want a new dad.  No, I said. It's not that. I like Abel. I like him a lot. But you shouldn't marry him. I didn't know the word sinister then, but if I had, I probably would have used it. There's just something not right about him. I don't trust him. I don't think he's a good person."	"I understand that it's hard, she said. I understand that you don't want a new dad.  No, I said. It's not that. I like Abel. I like him a lot. But you shouldn't marry him. I didn't know the word sinister then, but if I had, I probably would have used it. There's just something not right about him. I don't trust him. I don't think he's a good person."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1305"	" I'd always been fine with my mom dating this guy, but I'd never considered the possibility of him becoming a permanent addition to our family. I enjoyed being with Abel, the same way I enjoyed playing with a tiger cub the first time I went to a tiger sanctuary. I liked it, I had fun with it, but I never thought about bringing it home."	"I'd always been fine with my mom dating this guy, but I'd never considered the possibility of him becoming a permanent addition to our family. I enjoyed being with Abel, the same way I enjoyed playing with a tiger cub the first time I went to a tiger sanctuary. I liked it, I had fun with it, but I never thought about bringing it home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1307"	" Mom and Abel got married. There was no ceremony, no exchange of rings. They went and signed the papers and that was it. A year or so later, my baby brother Andrew was born. I only vaguely remember my mom being gone for a few days and when she got back, there was now this thing in the house that cried and shat and got fed. But when you're nine years older than your sibling, their arrival doesn't change much for you. I wasn't changing diapers. I was out playing arcade games at the shop."	"Mom and Abel got married. There was no ceremony, no exchange of rings. They went and signed the papers and that was it. A year or so later, my baby brother Andrew was born. I only vaguely remember my mom being gone for a few days and when she got back, there was now this thing in the house that cried and shat and got fed. But when you're nine years older than your sibling, their arrival doesn't change much for you. I wasn't changing diapers. I was out playing arcade games at the shop."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1308"	" The main thing that marked Andrew's birth for me was our first trip to meet Abel's family during the Christmas holidays. They lived in Zannin, a town in Gazankulu, which had been the Tzonga homeland under apartheid. Zannin has a tropical climate, hot and humid. The white farms nearby grow some of the most amazing fruit, mangoes, lychees, the most beautiful bananas you've ever seen in your life. That's where all the fruit we export to Europe"	"The main thing that marked Andrew's birth for me was our first trip to meet Abel's family during the Christmas holidays. They lived in Zannin, a town in Gazankulu, which had been the Tzonga homeland under apartheid. Zannin has a tropical climate, hot and humid. The white farms nearby grow some of the most amazing fruit, mangoes, lychees, the most beautiful bananas you've ever seen in your life. That's where all the fruit we export to Europe."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1309"	" Tonga culture, I learned, is extremely patriarchal. We're talking about a world where women must bow when they greet a man. Men and women have limited social interactions. The men kill the animals and the women cook the food. Men are not even allowed in the kitchen. As a nine-year-old boy, I thought this was fantastic. I wasn't allowed to do anything. At home, my mom was forever making me do chores."	"Tonga culture, I learned, is extremely patriarchal. We're talking about a world where women must bow when they greet a man. Men and women have limited social interactions. The men kill the animals and the women cook the food. Men are not even allowed in the kitchen. As a nine year old boy, I thought this was fantastic. I wasn't allowed to do anything. At home, my mom was forever making me do chores."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"131"	" There was only one problem. It was illegal for black people to live there."	"There was only one problem. It was illegal for black people to live there."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1311"	" My mother loathed every moment of being there. For Abel, a first-born son who was bringing home his own first-born son, this trip was a huge deal."	"My mother loathed every moment of being there. For Abel, a first born son who was bringing home his own first born son, this trip was a huge deal."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1312"	" In the homelands, the firstborn son almost becomes the father slash husband by default because the dad is off working in the city. The firstborn son is the man of the house. He raises his siblings. His mom treats him with a certain level of respect as the dad's surrogate. Since this was Abel's big homecoming with Andrew, he expected my mother to play her traditional role too. But she refused."	"In the homelands, the firstborn son almost becomes the father slash husband by default because the dad is off working in the city. The firstborn son is the man of the house. He raises his siblings. His mom treats him with a certain level of respect as the dad's surrogate. Since this was Abel's big homecoming with Andrew, he expected my mother to play her traditional role too. But she refused."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1313"	" The women in Dhanin had a multitude of jobs during the day. They prepared breakfast, prepared tea, prepared lunch, did the washing and the cleaning. The men had been working all year in the city to support the family, so this was their vacation more or less. They were at leisure, waited on by the women. They might slaughter a goat or something, do whatever manly tasks needed to be done, but then they would go to an area that was only for men and hang out and drink while the women cooked"	"The women in Dhanin had a multitude of jobs during the day. They prepared breakfast, prepared tea, prepared lunch, did the washing and the cleaning. The men had been working all year in the city to support the family, so this was their vacation more or less. They were at leisure, waited on by the women. They might slaughter a goat or something, do whatever manly tasks needed to be done, but then they would go to an area that was only for men and hang out and drink while the women cooked."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1314"	" The whole tradition of women bowing to the men, my mom found that absurd. But she didn't refuse to do it. She overdid it. She made a mockery of it. The other women would bow before men with this polite little curtsy. My mom would go down and cower, groveling in the dirt like she was worshipping a deity. And she'd stay down there for a long time, like a really long time. Long enough to make everyone very uncomfortable."	"The whole tradition of women bowing to the men, my mom found that absurd. But she didn't refuse to do it. She overdid it. She made a mockery of it. The other women would bow before men with this polite little curtsy. My mom would go down and cower, groveling in the dirt like she was worshipping a deity. And she'd stay down there for a long time, like a really long time. Long enough to make everyone very uncomfortable."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1316"	" Up to that point, I'd lived my whole life in a world run by women. But after my mom and Abel were married, and especially after Andrew was born, I watched him try to assert himself and impose his ideas of what he thought his family should be. One thing that became clear early on was that those ideas did not include me. I was a reminder that my mom had lived a life before him. I didn't even share his color. His family was him, my mom, and the new baby."	"Up to that point, I'd lived my whole life in a world run by women. But after my mom and Abel were married, and especially after Andrew was born, I watched him try to assert himself and impose his ideas of what he thought his family should be. One thing that became clear early on was that those ideas did not include me. I was a reminder that my mom had lived a life before him. I didn't even share his color. His family was him, my mom, and the new baby."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1317"	" Abel's presence in the house brought with it new rules. One of the first things he did was kick Fuffi and Panther out of the house. No dogs in the house. But we've always had dogs in the house. Not anymore. In an African home, dogs sleep outside. People sleep inside. Putting the dogs in the yard was Abel's way of saying, we're going to do things around here the way they're supposed to be done."	"Abel's presence in the house brought with it new rules. One of the first things he did was kick Fuffi and Panther out of the house. No dogs in the house. But we've always had dogs in the house. Not anymore. In an African home, dogs sleep outside. People sleep inside. Putting the dogs in the yard was Abel's way of saying, we're going to do things around here the way they're supposed to be done."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1318"	" When they were just dating, my mother was still the free spirit, doing what she wanted, going where she wanted. Slowly, those things got rained in. I could feel that he was trying to reign in our independence. He even got upset about church. You cannot be at church the whole day, he'd say. My wife has gone all day and what will people say? Why is his wife not around? Where is she? Who goes to church for the whole day? No, no, no. This brings disrespect to me."	"When they were just dating, my mother was still the free spirit, doing what she wanted, going where she wanted. Slowly, those things got rained in. I could feel that he was trying to reign in our independence. He even got upset about church. You cannot be at church the whole day, he'd say. My wife has gone all day and what will people say? Why is his wife not around? Where is she? Who goes to church for the whole day? No, no, no. This brings disrespect to me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1319"	" He tried to stop her from spending so much time at church. And one of the most effective tools he used was to stop fixing my mother's car. It would break down and he'd purposefully let it sit. My mom couldn't afford another car and she couldn't get the car fixed somewhere else. You're married to a mechanic and you're going to get your car fixed by another mechanic? That's worse than cheating. So Abel became our only transport and he would refuse to take us places."	"He tried to stop her from spending so much time at church. And one of the most effective tools he used was to stop fixing my mother's car. It would break down and he'd purposefully let it sit. My mom couldn't afford another car and she couldn't get the car fixed somewhere else. You're married to a mechanic and you're going to get your car fixed by another mechanic? That's worse than cheating. So Abel became our only transport and he would refuse to take us places."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1320"	" Losing the car also meant losing access to my dad. We had to ask Abel for rides into town and he didn't like what they were for. It was an insult to his manhood. We need to go to Yovil. Why are you going to Yovil? To see Trevor's dad. What? No, no. How can I take my wife and her child and drop you off there? You're insulting me. What do I tell my friends? What do I tell my family? My wife is at another man's house?"	"Losing the car also meant losing access to my dad. We had to ask Abel for rides into town and he didn't like what they were for. It was an insult to his manhood. We need to go to Yovil. Why are you going to Yovil? To see Trevor's dad. What? No, no. How can I take my wife and her child and drop you off there? You're insulting me. What do I tell my friends? What do I tell my family? My wife is at another man's house?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1321"	" I saw my father less and less. Not long after, he moved down to Cape Town."	"I saw my father less and less. Not long after, he moved down to Cape Town."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1322"	" Abel wanted a traditional marriage with a traditional wife."	"Abel wanted a traditional marriage with a traditional wife."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1323"	" For a long time I wondered why he ever married a woman like my mom in the first place, as she was the opposite of that in every way. If he wanted a woman to bow to him, there were plenty of girls back in Zannin being raised solely for that purpose. The way my mother explained it, the traditional man wants a woman to be subservient, but he never falls in love with subservient women. He's attracted to independent women."	"For a long time I wondered why he ever married a woman like my mom in the first place, as she was the opposite of that in every way. If he wanted a woman to bow to him, there were plenty of girls back in Zannin being raised solely for that purpose. The way my mother explained it, the traditional man wants a woman to be subservient, but he never falls in love with subservient women. He's attracted to independent women."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1325"	" When we first met Abel, he smoked a lot of weed. He drank too, but it was mostly weed. Looking back, I almost miss his pothead days because the weed mellowed him out. He'd smoke, chill, watch TV, and fall asleep. I think subconsciously, it was something he knew he needed to do to take the edge of his anger."	"When we first met Abel, he smoked a lot of weed. He drank too, but it was mostly weed. Looking back, I almost miss his pothead days because the weed mellowed him out. He'd smoke, chill, watch TV, and fall asleep. I think subconsciously, it was something he knew he needed to do to take the edge of his anger."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1326"	" He stopped smoking after he and my mom got married. She made him stop for religious reasons. The body is a temple and so on. But what none of us saw coming was that when he stopped smoking weed, he just replaced it with alcohol. He started drinking more and more. He never came home from work sober. An average day was a six-pack of beer after work. Weeknights he'd have a buzz on. Some Fridays and Saturdays, he just didn't come home."	"He stopped smoking after he and my mom got married. She made him stop for religious reasons. The body is a temple and so on. But what none of us saw coming was that when he stopped smoking weed, he just replaced it with alcohol. He started drinking more and more. He never came home from work sober. An average day was a six pack of beer after work. Weeknights he'd have a buzz on. Some Fridays and Saturdays, he just didn't come home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1327"	" When Abel drank, his eyes would go red. Bloodshot. That was the clue I learned to read. I always thought of Abel as a cobra. Calm, perfectly still, then explosive. There was no ranting and raving, no clenched fists. He'd be very quiet. And then out of nowhere, the violence would come. The eyes were my only clue to stay away. His eyes were everything. They were the eyes of the devil."	"When Abel drank, his eyes would go red. Bloodshot. That was the clue I learned to read. I always thought of Abel as a cobra. Calm, perfectly still, then explosive. There was no ranting and raving, no clenched fists. He'd be very quiet. And then out of nowhere, the violence would come. The eyes were my only clue to stay away. His eyes were everything. They were the eyes of the devil."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1328"	" Late one night, we woke up to find a house filled with smoke. Abel hadn't come home by the time we'd gone to bed, and I'd fallen asleep in my mother's room with her and Andrew, who are still a baby. I jerked awake to her shaking me and screaming, Trevor, Trevor! There was smoke everywhere. We thought the house was burning down. My mom ran down the hallway to the kitchen, where she discovered the kitchen on fire. Abel had driven home drunk, blind drunk, drunker than we'd ever seen him before. He'd been hungry,"	"Late one night, we woke up to find a house filled with smoke. Abel hadn't come home by the time we'd gone to bed, and I'd fallen asleep in my mother's room with her and Andrew, who are still a baby. I jerked awake to her shaking me and screaming, Trevor, Trevor! There was smoke everywhere. We thought the house was burning down. My mom ran down the hallway to the kitchen, where she discovered the kitchen on fire. Abel had driven home drunk, blind drunk, drunker than we'd ever seen him before. He'd been hungry,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"133"	" The township was where you lived, but your status as a labourer was the only thing that permitted you to stay there. If your papers were revoked for any reason, you could be deported back to the homelands."	"The township was where you lived, but your status as a labourer was the only thing that permitted you to stay there. If your papers were revoked for any reason, you could be deported back to the homelands."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1330"	" Mbui, he said softly, you don't respect me. Respect! You almost burnt down our house. Respect! Oh please! Earn your respect. You want me to respect you as a man, then act like a man. Drinking your money in the streets and wear your child's diapers. Respect! Earn your respect! Mbui, you're not a man, you're a child. Mbui, I can't have a child for a husband. Mbui, I've got my own"	"Mbui, he said softly, you don't respect me. Respect! You almost burnt down our house. Respect! Oh please! Earn your respect. You want me to respect you as a man, then act like a man. Drinking your money in the streets and wear your child's diapers. Respect! Earn your respect! Mbui, you're not a man, you're a child. Mbui, I can't have a child for a husband. Mbui, I've got my own."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1331"	" The whole time, in my head, I kept thinking the same thing Abel was saying."	"The whole time, in my head, I kept thinking the same thing Abel was saying."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1332"	" To this day, I'll never forget the patronizing, condescending way they spoke to her. Calm down, lady. Calm down. Who hit you? My husband. Your husband? What did you do? Did you make him angry? Did I? What? No, he hit me. I'm here to lay a charge against. No, no, ma'am. Why do you want to make a case, eh? You're sure you want to do this? Go home and talk to your husband."	"To this day, I'll never forget the patronizing, condescending way they spoke to her. Calm down, lady. Calm down. Who hit you? My husband. Your husband? What did you do? Did you make him angry? Did I? What? No, he hit me. I'm here to lay a charge against. No, no, ma'am. Why do you want to make a case, eh? You're sure you want to do this? Go home and talk to your husband."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1334"	" Mom started yelling at them, demanding to see the station commander, and right then, Abel walked into the station. He'd driven down. He'd sobered up a bit, but he was still drunk, driving into a police station. That didn't matter. He walked over to the cops, and the station turned into a boys' club, like they were a bunch of old pals. Hey, guys, he said. You know how it is. You know how women can be."	"Mom started yelling at them, demanding to see the station commander, and right then, Abel walked into the station. He'd driven down. He'd sobered up a bit, but he was still drunk, driving into a police station. That didn't matter. He walked over to the cops, and the station turned into a boys' club, like they were a bunch of old pals. Hey, guys, he said. You know how it is. You know how women can be."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1335"	" I had never seen anything like it. I was nine years old and I still thought of the police as the good guys. You get in trouble, you call the police, and those flashing red and blue lights are gonna come and save you. But I remember standing there, watching my mom, flabbergasted, horrified that these cops wouldn't help her. That's when I realized the police were not who I thought they were. They were men first and police"	"I had never seen anything like it. I was nine years old and I still thought of the police as the good guys. You get in trouble, you call the police, and those flashing red and blue lights are gonna come and save you. But I remember standing there, watching my mom, flabbergasted, horrified that these cops wouldn't help her. That's when I realized the police were not who I thought they were. They were men first and police."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1336"	" We left the station. My mother took me and Andrew, and we went out to stay with my grandmother in Soweto for a while."	"We left the station. My mother took me and Andrew, and we went out to stay with my grandmother in Soweto for a while."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1337"	" A few weeks later, Abel drove over and apologized. Abel was always sincere and heartfelt with his apologies. He didn't mean it. He knows he was wrong. He'll never do it again."	"A few weeks later, Abel drove over and apologized. Abel was always sincere and heartfelt with his apologies. He didn't mean it. He knows he was wrong. He'll never do it again."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1339"	" Abel was an amazing mechanic, probably one of the best around at the time. He'd been to technical college, graduated first in his class. He'd had job offers from BMW and Mercedes. His business thrived on referrals. People would bring their cars from all over the city for him to fix because he could work miracles on them. My mom truly believed in him. She thought she could raise him up, help him make good on his potential, not merely as a mechanic, but as the owner of his own work"	"Abel was an amazing mechanic, probably one of the best around at the time. He'd been to technical college, graduated first in his class. He'd had job offers from BMW and Mercedes. His business thrived on referrals. People would bring their cars from all over the city for him to fix because he could work miracles on them. My mom truly believed in him. She thought she could raise him up, help him make good on his potential, not merely as a mechanic, but as the owner of his own work."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"134"	" To leave the township for work in the city, or for any other reason, you had to carry a pass with your ID number. Otherwise, you could be arrested."	"To leave the township for work in the city, or for any other reason, you had to carry a pass with your ID number. Otherwise, you could be arrested."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1340"	" As headstrong and independent as my mom is, she remains the woman who gives back. She gives, and gives, and gives. That is her nature. She refused to be subservient to Abel at home, but she did want him to succeed as a man. If she could make their marriage a true marriage of equals, she was willing to pour herself into it completely, the same way she poured herself into her children."	"As headstrong and independent as my mom is, she remains the woman who gives back. She gives, and gives, and gives. That is her nature. She refused to be subservient to Abel at home, but she did want him to succeed as a man. If she could make their marriage a true marriage of equals, she was willing to pour herself into it completely, the same way she poured herself into her children."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1341"	" At some point, Abel's boss decided to sell Mighty Mechanics and retire. My mom had some money saved and she helped Abel buy it. They moved the workshop from Yovell to the industrial area of Weinberg, just west of Alex and Mighty Mechanics became the new family business."	"At some point, Abel's boss decided to sell Mighty Mechanics and retire. My mom had some money saved and she helped Abel buy it. They moved the workshop from Yovell to the industrial area of Weinberg, just west of Alex and Mighty Mechanics became the new family business."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1343"	" The garage gradually took over our lives. I'd get out of school and walk the five kilometers from Maryvale to the workshop. I'll sit for hours and try to do my homework with the machines and repairs going on around me. Inevitably, Abel would get behind schedule on a car and since he was our ride, we'd have to wait for him to finish before we could go home. It started out as, we're running late, go nap in a car and we'll tell you when we're leaving. I'd crawl in the backseat of some sedan."	"The garage gradually took over our lives. I'd get out of school and walk the five kilometers from Maryvale to the workshop. I'll sit for hours and try to do my homework with the machines and repairs going on around me. Inevitably, Abel would get behind schedule on a car and since he was our ride, we'd have to wait for him to finish before we could go home. It started out as, we're running late, go nap in a car and we'll tell you when we're leaving. I'd crawl in the backseat of some sedan."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1344"	" We started sleeping at the garage. At first it was one or two nights a week. Then three or four. Then my mom sold the house and put that money into the business as well. She went all in. She gave up everything for him."	"We started sleeping at the garage. At first it was one or two nights a week. Then three or four. Then my mom sold the house and put that money into the business as well. She went all in. She gave up everything for him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1345"	" From that point on, we lived in the garage. It was a warehouse, basically, and not the fancy, romantic sort of warehouse hipsters might one day turn into lofts. No, no. It was a cold, empty space. Gray concrete floors, stained with oil and grease. Old junk cars and car parts everywhere. Near the front, next to the roller door that opened onto the street, there was a tiny office built out of drywall for doing paperwork and such. In the back, there was a kitchenette."	"From that point on, we lived in the garage. It was a warehouse, basically, and not the fancy, romantic sort of warehouse hipsters might one day turn into lofts. No, no. It was a cold, empty space. Gray concrete floors, stained with oil and grease. Old junk cars and car parts everywhere. Near the front, next to the roller door that opened onto the street, there was a tiny office built out of drywall for doing paperwork and such. In the back, there was a kitchenette."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1346"	" Abel and my mom slept with Andrew in the office, on a thin mattress they'd roll out on the floor. I slept in the cars. I got really good at sleeping in cars. I know all the best cars to sleep in. The worst were the cheap ones. Volkswagen's low-end Japanese sedans. The seats barely reclined. No headrests. Cheap fake leather upholstery. I'd spend half the night trying not to slide off the seats. I'd wake up with sore knees because I couldn't stretch out and extend my legs."	"Abel and my mom slept with Andrew in the office, on a thin mattress they'd roll out on the floor. I slept in the cars. I got really good at sleeping in cars. I know all the best cars to sleep in. The worst were the cheap ones. Volkswagen's low end Japanese sedans. The seats barely reclined. No headrests. Cheap fake leather upholstery. I'd spend half the night trying not to slide off the seats. I'd wake up with sore knees because I couldn't stretch out and extend my legs."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1348"	" We worked and worked and worked, but no matter how many hours we put in, the business kept losing money. We lost everything. We couldn't even afford real food."	"We worked and worked and worked, but no matter how many hours we put in, the business kept losing money. We lost everything. We couldn't even afford real food."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1349"	" There was one month, I'll never forget, the worst month of my life."	"There was one month, I'll never forget, the worst month of my life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"135"	" There was also a curfew. After a certain hour, blacks had to be back home in the township or risk arrest. My mother didn't care. She was determined to never go home again. So she stayed in town, hiding and sleeping in public restrooms until she learned the rules of navigating a city from the other black women who had contrived to live there. Prostitutes."	"There was also a curfew. After a certain hour, blacks had to be back home in the township or risk arrest. My mother didn't care. She was determined to never go home again. So she stayed in town, hiding and sleeping in public restrooms until she learned the rules of navigating a city from the other black women who had contrived to live there. Prostitutes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1350"	" We were so broke that for weeks we ate nothing but bowls of morocho, a kind of wild spinach cooked with caterpillars, mopani worms they're called. Mopani worms are literally the cheapest thing that only the poorest of poor people eat. I grew up poor, but there's poor and then there's, wait, I'm eating worms? Mopani worms are the sort of thing where even people in Soweto would be like, yeah, no."	"We were so broke that for weeks we ate nothing but bowls of morocho, a kind of wild spinach cooked with caterpillars, mopani worms they're called. Mopani worms are literally the cheapest thing that only the poorest of poor people eat. I grew up poor, but there's poor and then there's, wait, I'm eating worms? Mopani worms are the sort of thing where even people in Soweto would be like, yeah, no."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1352"	" For a while, I sort of enjoyed the caterpillars. It was like a food adventure. But then, over the course of weeks, eating them every day, day after day, I couldn't take it anymore. I'll never forget the day I bit him a piney worm in half, and that yellow-green ooze came out and I thought, I'm eating caterpillar shit. Instantly I wanted to throw up. I snapped and ran to my mom crying. I don't want to eat caterpillars anymore!"	"For a while, I sort of enjoyed the caterpillars. It was like a food adventure. But then, over the course of weeks, eating them every day, day after day, I couldn't take it anymore. I'll never forget the day I bit him a piney worm in half, and that yellow green ooze came out and I thought, I'm eating caterpillar shit. Instantly I wanted to throw up. I snapped and ran to my mom crying. I don't want to eat caterpillars anymore!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1353"	" That was the period of my life I hated the most. Work all night, sleep in some car, wake up, wash up in a janitor's sink, brush my teeth in a little metal basin, brush my hair in the rearview mirror of a Toyota, then try to get dressed without getting oil and grease all over my school clothes so the kids at school won't know I live in a garage. Oh, I hated it so much. I hated cars. I hated sleeping in cars. I hated working on cars. I hated getting my hair"	"That was the period of my life I hated the most. Work all night, sleep in some car, wake up, wash up in a janitor's sink, brush my teeth in a little metal basin, brush my hair in the rearview mirror of a Toyota, then try to get dressed without getting oil and grease all over my school clothes so the kids at school won't know I live in a garage. Oh, I hated it so much. I hated cars. I hated sleeping in cars. I hated working on cars. I hated getting my hair."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1354"	" I didn't hate my mom or even Abel, funnily enough, because I saw how hard everyone was working. At first, I didn't know about the mistakes being made on the business level that were making it hard, so it just felt like a hard situation. But eventually, I started to see why the business was hemorrhaging money."	"I didn't hate my mom or even Abel, funnily enough, because I saw how hard everyone was working. At first, I didn't know about the mistakes being made on the business level that were making it hard, so it just felt like a hard situation. But eventually, I started to see why the business was hemorrhaging money."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1355"	" I used to go around and buy auto parts for Abel, and I learned that he was buying his parts on credit. The vendors were charging him a crazy markup. The debt was crippling the company, and instead of paying off the debt, he was drinking what little cash he made. Brilliant mechanic, horrible businessman."	"I used to go around and buy auto parts for Abel, and I learned that he was buying his parts on credit. The vendors were charging him a crazy markup. The debt was crippling the company, and instead of paying off the debt, he was drinking what little cash he made. Brilliant mechanic, horrible businessman."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1357"	" We lived in the workshop for close to a year, and then my mom had had enough. She was willing to help him, but not if he was going to drink all the profits. She had always been independent, self-sufficient, but she'd lost that part of herself at the mercy of someone else's failed dream. At some point she said, I can't do this anymore. I'm out of this. I'm done. She went out and got a job as a secretary with a real estate developer. And somehow between that and borrowing against whatever equity was left enabled,"	"We lived in the workshop for close to a year, and then my mom had had enough. She was willing to help him, but not if he was going to drink all the profits. She had always been independent, self sufficient, but she'd lost that part of herself at the mercy of someone else's failed dream. At some point she said, I can't do this anymore. I'm out of this. I'm done. She went out and got a job as a secretary with a real estate developer. And somehow between that and borrowing against whatever equity was left enabled,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1358"	" We moved, the workshop was seized by Abel's creditors, and that was the end of that."	"We moved, the workshop was seized by Abel's creditors, and that was the end of that."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1359"	" Growing up, I suffered no shortage of my mother's old school, Old Testament discipline. She spared no rod and spoiled no child. With Andrew, she was different. He got spankings at first, but they tapered off and eventually went away. When I asked her why I got beatings and Andrew didn't, she made a joke about it, like she does with everything."	"Growing up, I suffered no shortage of my mother's old school, Old Testament discipline. She spared no rod and spoiled no child. With Andrew, she was different. He got spankings at first, but they tapered off and eventually went away. When I asked her why I got beatings and Andrew didn't, she made a joke about it, like she does with everything."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"136"	" Many of the prostitutes in town worked Hossa. They spoke my mother's language and showed her how to survive. They taught her how to dress up in a pair of maids overalls to move around the city without being questioned. They also introduced her to white men who were willing to rent out flats in town. A lot of these men were foreigners, Germans and Portuguese, who didn't care about the law and were happy to sign a lease giving a prostitute a place to live and work in exchange for a steady peace on the side. My mom wasn't interested in any such arrangement"	"Many of the prostitutes in town worked Hossa. They spoke my mother's language and showed her how to survive. They taught her how to dress up in a pair of maids overalls to move around the city without being questioned. They also introduced her to white men who were willing to rent out flats in town. A lot of these men were foreigners, Germans and Portuguese, who didn't care about the law and were happy to sign a lease giving a prostitute a place to live and work in exchange for a steady peace on the side. My mom wasn't interested in any such arrangement."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1361"	" I immersed myself in those worlds and I came back looking at the world a different way. I saw that not all families are violent. I saw the futility of violence, the cycle that just repeats itself, the damage that's inflicted on people that they in turn inflict on others."	"I immersed myself in those worlds and I came back looking at the world a different way. I saw that not all families are violent. I saw the futility of violence, the cycle that just repeats itself, the damage that's inflicted on people that they in turn inflict on others."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1362"	" I saw more than anything that relationships are not sustained by violence, but by love. Love is a creative act. When you love someone, you create a new world for them. My mother did that for me, and with the progress I made and the things I learned, I came back and created a new world and a new understanding for her. After that, she never raised her hand to her children again. Unfortunately, by the time she stopped,"	"I saw more than anything that relationships are not sustained by violence, but by love. Love is a creative act. When you love someone, you create a new world for them. My mother did that for me, and with the progress I made and the things I learned, I came back and created a new world and a new understanding for her. After that, she never raised her hand to her children again. Unfortunately, by the time she stopped,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1363"	" In all the times I received beatings from my mom, I was never scared of her. I didn't like it, certainly. When she said, I hit you out of love, I didn't necessarily agree with her thinking. But I understood that it was discipline, and it was being done for a purpose. The first time Abel hit me, I felt something I had never felt before. I felt terror."	"In all the times I received beatings from my mom, I was never scared of her. I didn't like it, certainly. When she said, I hit you out of love, I didn't necessarily agree with her thinking. But I understood that it was discipline, and it was being done for a purpose. The first time Abel hit me, I felt something I had never felt before. I felt terror."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1364"	" I was in grade 6, my last year at Maryville. We'd moved to Highlands North and I'd gotten in trouble at school for forging my mom's signature on some documents. There was some activity I didn't want to participate in, so I'd signed the release in her name to get out of it. The school called my mom and she asked me about it when I got home that afternoon. I was certain she was going to punish me, but this turned out to be one of those times when she didn't care. She said I should have just asked her. She would have signed the phone."	"I was in grade  six , my last year at Maryville. We'd moved to Highlands North and I'd gotten in trouble at school for forging my mom's signature on some documents. There was some activity I didn't want to participate in, so I'd signed the release in her name to get out of it. The school called my mom and she asked me about it when I got home that afternoon. I was certain she was going to punish me, but this turned out to be one of those times when she didn't care. She said I should have just asked her. She would have signed the phone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.02"	" oblivious to what was coming, and then out of nowhere it came."	"oblivious to what was coming, and then out of nowhere it came."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.03"	" The first blow hit me in the ribs. My mind flashed. It's a trap. I've never been in a fight before, had never learned how to fight, but I had this instinct that told me to get in close."	"The first blow hit me in the ribs. My mind flashed. It's a trap. I've never been in a fight before, had never learned how to fight, but I had this instinct that told me to get in close."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.04"	" I had seen what those long arms could do. I had seen him take down my mom, but more important, I'd seen him take down grown men. Abel never hit people with a punch. I never saw him punch another person with a closed fist."	"I had seen what those long arms could do. I had seen him take down my mom, but more important, I'd seen him take down grown men. Abel never hit people with a punch. I never saw him punch another person with a closed fist."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.05"	" But he had this ability to hit a grown man across his face with an open hand and then crumple."	"But he had this ability to hit a grown man across his face with an open hand and then crumple."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.07"	" I looked at his arms and I knew, don't be on the other end of those things."	"I looked at his arms and I knew, don't be on the other end of those things."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.08"	" I ducked in close and he kept hitting and hitting, but I was in too tight for him to land any solid blows. Then he caught on and he stopped hitting and started trying to grapple and wrestle me."	"I ducked in close and he kept hitting and hitting, but I was in too tight for him to land any solid blows. Then he caught on and he stopped hitting and started trying to grapple and wrestle me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.09"	" He did this thing where he grabbed the skin on my arms and pinched it between his thumb and forefinger and twisted hard."	"He did this thing where he grabbed the skin on my arms and pinched it between his thumb and forefinger and twisted hard."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.10"	" Jesus that hurts."	"Jesus that hurts."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.12"	" I had never been that scared before, ever, because there was no purpose to it."	"I had never been that scared before, ever, because there was no purpose to it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.13"	" That's what made it so terrifying."	"That's what made it so terrifying."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.14"	" It wasn't discipline."	"It wasn't discipline."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.15"	" Nothing about it was coming from a place of love."	"Nothing about it was coming from a place of love."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.17"	" when his rage was spent."	"when his rage was spent."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1365.18"	" It felt like there was something inside him that wanted to destroy me."	"It felt like there was something inside him that wanted to destroy me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1366"	" Abel was much bigger and stronger than me. But being in a confined space was to my advantage, because he didn't have the room to maneuver. As he grappled and punched, I somehow managed to twist and wriggle my way around him and slip out the door. I was quick, but Abel was quick as well. He chased me. I ran out of the house and jumped over the gate, and I ran and I ran and I ran. The last time I turned around, he was rounding the gates coming out of the yard after me."	"Abel was much bigger and stronger than me. But being in a confined space was to my advantage, because he didn't have the room to maneuver. As he grappled and punched, I somehow managed to twist and wriggle my way around him and slip out the door. I was quick, but Abel was quick as well. He chased me. I ran out of the house and jumped over the gate, and I ran and I ran and I ran. The last time I turned around, he was rounding the gates coming out of the yard after me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1367"	" Until I turned 25 years old, I had a recurring nightmare of the look on his face as he came around that corner."	"Until I turned  twenty five  years old, I had a recurring nightmare of the look on his face as he came around that corner."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1369"	" You don't have to teach me a lesson twice. From that day until the day I left, I lived like a mouse in that house. If Abel was in a room, I was out of the room. If he was in one corner, I was in the other corner. If he walked into a room, I would get up and act like I was going to the kitchen. Then when I re-entered the room, I would make sure I was close to the exit. He could be in the happiest, friendliest mood. Didn't matter. Never again did I let him come between me and a dog."	"You don't have to teach me a lesson twice. From that day until the day I left, I lived like a mouse in that house. If Abel was in a room, I was out of the room. If he was in one corner, I was in the other corner. If he walked into a room, I would get up and act like I was going to the kitchen. Then when I re entered the room, I would make sure I was close to the exit. He could be in the happiest, friendliest mood. Didn't matter. Never again did I let him come between me and a dog."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"137"	" My mom's secret flat was in a neighborhood called Hillbrow. She lived in number 203. Down the corridor was a tall, brown-haired, brown-eyed Swiss German expat named Robert. He lived in 206. As a former trading colony, South Africa has always had a large expatriate community. People find their way here. Tons of Germans, lots of Dutch. Hillbrow at the time was the Greenwich Village of South Africa. It was a thriving scene."	"My mom's secret flat was in a neighborhood called Hillbrow. She lived in number  two hundred and three . Down the corridor was a tall, brown haired, brown eyed Swiss German expat named Robert. He lived in  two hundred and six . As a former trading colony, South Africa has always had a large expatriate community. People find their way here. Tons of Germans, lots of Dutch. Hillbrow at the time was the Greenwich Village of South Africa. It was a thriving scene."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1370"	" It was different for Andrew. Andrew was Abel's son. Flesh of his flesh. Blood of his blood. Despite being nine years younger than me, Andrew was really the eldest son in that house. Abel's firstborn. And that afforded him a respect that I, and even my mother, never enjoyed. And Andrew had nothing but love for that man, despite his shortcomings. Because of that love, I think, out of all of us, Andrew was the only one who wasn't afraid. He was the lion tamer. Only, he'd be"	"It was different for Andrew. Andrew was Abel's son. Flesh of his flesh. Blood of his blood. Despite being nine years younger than me, Andrew was really the eldest son in that house. Abel's firstborn. And that afforded him a respect that I, and even my mother, never enjoyed. And Andrew had nothing but love for that man, despite his shortcomings. Because of that love, I think, out of all of us, Andrew was the only one who wasn't afraid. He was the lion tamer. Only, he'd be."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1371"	" For me, the first glint of anger or madness from Abel, and I was gone. Andrew would stay and try and talk Abel down. He'd even get between Abel and Mom. I remember one night, when Abel threw a bottle of Jack Daniels at Andrew's head, it just missed him and exploded on the wall. Which is to say that Andrew stayed long enough to get the bottle thrown at him. I wouldn't have stuck around long enough for Abel to get a bead on me."	"For me, the first glint of anger or madness from Abel, and I was gone. Andrew would stay and try and talk Abel down. He'd even get between Abel and Mom. I remember one night, when Abel threw a bottle of Jack Daniels at Andrew's head, it just missed him and exploded on the wall. Which is to say that Andrew stayed long enough to get the bottle thrown at him. I wouldn't have stuck around long enough for Abel to get a bead on me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1373"	" In African culture, there's legal marriage and traditional marriage. Just because you divorce someone legally doesn't mean they are no longer your spouse. Once Abel's debts and his terrible business decisions started impacting my mother's credit and her ability to support her sons, she wanted out. I don't have debts, she said. I don't have bad credit. I'm not doing these things with you. We were still a family and they were still traditionally married, but she divorced him in order to separate their financial affairs."	"In African culture, there's legal marriage and traditional marriage. Just because you divorce someone legally doesn't mean they are no longer your spouse. Once Abel's debts and his terrible business decisions started impacting my mother's credit and her ability to support her sons, she wanted out. I don't have debts, she said. I don't have bad credit. I'm not doing these things with you. We were still a family and they were still traditionally married, but she divorced him in order to separate their financial affairs."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1374"	" Because Abel had started running an unlicensed business in a residential area, one of the neighbors filed a petition to get rid of us. My mom applied for a license to be able to operate a business on the property. The workshop stayed, but Abel kept running it into the ground, drinking his money."	"Because Abel had started running an unlicensed business in a residential area, one of the neighbors filed a petition to get rid of us. My mom applied for a license to be able to operate a business on the property. The workshop stayed, but Abel kept running it into the ground, drinking his money."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1375"	" At the same time, my mother started moving up at the real estate company she worked for, taking on more responsibilities and earning a better salary. His workshop became like a side hobby almost. He was supposed to pay for Andrew's school fees and groceries, but he started falling behind even on that. And soon, my mom was paying for everything. She paid the electricity. She paid the mortgage. He literally contributed nothing."	"At the same time, my mother started moving up at the real estate company she worked for, taking on more responsibilities and earning a better salary. His workshop became like a side hobby almost. He was supposed to pay for Andrew's school fees and groceries, but he started falling behind even on that. And soon, my mom was paying for everything. She paid the electricity. She paid the mortgage. He literally contributed nothing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1376"	" That was the turning point. When my mother started making more money and getting her independence back, that's when we saw the dragon emerge. The drinking got worse. He grew more and more violent. It wasn't long after coming for me in the pantry that Abel hit my mom for the second time. I can't recall the details of it, because now it's muddled with all the other times that came after it. I do remember that the police were called. They came out to the house this time. But again, it was"	"That was the turning point. When my mother started making more money and getting her independence back, that's when we saw the dragon emerge. The drinking got worse. He grew more and more violent. It wasn't long after coming for me in the pantry that Abel hit my mom for the second time. I can't recall the details of it, because now it's muddled with all the other times that came after it. I do remember that the police were called. They came out to the house this time. But again, it was."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1378"	" Whenever he'd hit her or come after me, my mom would find me crying afterward and take me aside. She'd give me the same talk every time."	"Whenever he'd hit her or come after me, my mom would find me crying afterward and take me aside. She'd give me the same talk every time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1379"	" Pray for Abel, she'd say. Because he doesn't hate us. He hates himself."	"Pray for Abel, she'd say. Because he doesn't hate us. He hates himself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"138"	" Integration by its nature was a political act. But the get-togethers themselves weren't political at all. People would meet up and hang out, have parties."	"Integration by its nature was a political act. But the get togethers themselves weren't political at all. People would meet up and hang out, have parties."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1380"	" To a kid, this makes no sense. Well, if he hates himself, I'd say. Why doesn't he kick himself?"	"To a kid, this makes no sense. Well, if he hates himself, I'd say. Why doesn't he kick himself?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1382"	" I remember one night, he came home fuck drunk, stumbling through the house. He stumbled into my room, muttering to himself, and I woke up to see him whip out his dick and start pissing on the floor. He thought he was in the bathroom. That's how drunk he would get. He wouldn't know which room in the house he was in. There were so many nights he would stumble into my room, thinking it was his, and kick me out of bed and pass out. I would yell at him, but it was like talking to a zombie. I'd go see him."	"I remember one night, he came home fuck drunk, stumbling through the house. He stumbled into my room, muttering to himself, and I woke up to see him whip out his dick and start pissing on the floor. He thought he was in the bathroom. That's how drunk he would get. He wouldn't know which room in the house he was in. There were so many nights he would stumble into my room, thinking it was his, and kick me out of bed and pass out. I would yell at him, but it was like talking to a zombie. I'd go see him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1383"	" He'd get wasted with his crew in the backyard every evening after work, and many nights he'd end up fighting with one of them. Someone would say something Abel didn't like, and he'd beat the shit out of them. The guy wouldn't show up for work, Tuesday or Wednesday. But then by Thursday he'd be back because he needed the job. Every few weeks it was the same story, like clockwork."	"He'd get wasted with his crew in the backyard every evening after work, and many nights he'd end up fighting with one of them. Someone would say something Abel didn't like, and he'd beat the shit out of them. The guy wouldn't show up for work, Tuesday or Wednesday. But then by Thursday he'd be back because he needed the job. Every few weeks it was the same story, like clockwork."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1384"	" Abel kicked the dogs too. Fuffie mostly. Panther was smart enough to stay away. But dumb, lovable Fuffie was forever trying to be Abel's friend. She'd cross his path, or be in his way when he'd had a few, and he'd give her the boot. After that, she'd go and hide somewhere for a while."	"Abel kicked the dogs too. Fuffie mostly. Panther was smart enough to stay away. But dumb, lovable Fuffie was forever trying to be Abel's friend. She'd cross his path, or be in his way when he'd had a few, and he'd give her the boot. After that, she'd go and hide somewhere for a while."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1385"	" Fufi getting kicked was always the warning sign that shit was about to go down. The dogs and the workers in the yard often got the first taste of his anger. And that would let the rest of us know to lie low."	"Fufi getting kicked was always the warning sign that shit was about to go down. The dogs and the workers in the yard often got the first taste of his anger. And that would let the rest of us know to lie low."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1387"	" The strange thing was that when Fuffi got kicked, she never yelped or cried. When the vet diagnosed her as deaf, he also found she had some condition where she didn't have a fully developed sense of touch. She didn't feel pain, which was why she would always start over with Abel like it was a new day. He'd kick her, she'd hide, then she'd be right back the next morning, wagging her tail."	"The strange thing was that when Fuffi got kicked, she never yelped or cried. When the vet diagnosed her as deaf, he also found she had some condition where she didn't have a fully developed sense of touch. She didn't feel pain, which was why she would always start over with Abel like it was a new day. He'd kick her, she'd hide, then she'd be right back the next morning, wagging her tail."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1388"	" Growing up in a home of abuse, you struggle with the notion that you can love a person you hate, or hate a person you love. It's a strange feeling. You want to live in a world where someone is good or bad, where you either hate them or love them. But that's not how people are."	"Growing up in a home of abuse, you struggle with the notion that you can love a person you hate, or hate a person you love. It's a strange feeling. You want to live in a world where someone is good or bad, where you either hate them or love them. But that's not how people are."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1389"	" There was an undercurrent of terror that ran through the house, but the actual beatings themselves were not that frequent. I think if they had been, the situation would have ended sooner. Ironically, the good times in between were what allowed it to drag out and escalate as far as it did. He had my mom once. Then the next time was three years later, and it was just a little bit worse. Then it was two years later, and it was just a little bit worse. Then it was a year later, and it was just a year later."	"There was an undercurrent of terror that ran through the house, but the actual beatings themselves were not that frequent. I think if they had been, the situation would have ended sooner. Ironically, the good times in between were what allowed it to drag out and escalate as far as it did. He had my mom once. Then the next time was three years later, and it was just a little bit worse. Then it was two years later, and it was just a little bit worse. Then it was a year later, and it was just a year later."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"139"	" My mom threw herself into that scene. She was always out at some club, some party, dancing, meeting people. She was a regular at the Hillbrow Tower, one of the tallest buildings in Africa at that time. It had a nightclub with a rotating dance floor on the top floor."	"My mom threw herself into that scene. She was always out at some club, some party, dancing, meeting people. She was a regular at the Hillbrow Tower, one of the tallest buildings in Africa at that time. It had a nightclub with a rotating dance floor on the top floor."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1391"	" One afternoon, I came home from Sandringham and my mom was very upset and worked up. This man is unbelievable, she said. What happened? He bought a gun! What? A gun? What do you mean he bought a gun?"	"One afternoon, I came home from Sandringham and my mom was very upset and worked up. This man is unbelievable, she said. What happened? He bought a gun! What? A gun? What do you mean he bought a gun?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1392"	" A gun was such a ridiculous thing in my world. In my mind, only cops and criminals had guns. Gable had gone out and bought a 9mm Parabellum Smith & Wesson. Sleek and black. Menacing. It didn't look cool like guns in movies. It looked like it killed things. Why did he buy a gun? I asked. I don't know. She said she'd confronted him about it, and he'd gone off on some nonsense about the world needing to learn to respect him."	"A gun was such a ridiculous thing in my world. In my mind, only cops and criminals had guns. Gable had gone out and bought a  nine mm Parabellum Smith  and  Wesson. Sleek and black. Menacing. It didn't look cool like guns in movies. It looked like it killed things. Why did he buy a gun? I asked. I don't know. She said she'd confronted him about it, and he'd gone off on some nonsense about the world needing to learn to respect him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1393"	" Not long after that, I moved out. The atmosphere had become toxic for me. I'd reached the point where I was as big as Abel, big enough to punch back. A father does not fear retribution from his son, but I was not his son. He knew that. The analogy my mom used was that there were now two male lions in the house. Every time he looks at you, he sees your father, she'd say."	"Not long after that, I moved out. The atmosphere had become toxic for me. I'd reached the point where I was as big as Abel, big enough to punch back. A father does not fear retribution from his son, but I was not his son. He knew that. The analogy my mom used was that there were now two male lions in the house. Every time he looks at you, he sees your father, she'd say."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1394"	" You're a constant reminder of another man. He hates you and you need to leave. You need to leave before you become like him."	"You're a constant reminder of another man. He hates you and you need to leave. You need to leave before you become like him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1396"	" She helped me get my flat and I moved out. The flat was only 10 minutes away from the house, so I was always around to drop in to help with errands or have dinner once in a while. But most important, whatever was going on with Abel, I didn't have to be involved."	"She helped me get my flat and I moved out. The flat was only  ten  minutes away from the house, so I was always around to drop in to help with errands or have dinner once in a while. But most important, whatever was going on with Abel, I didn't have to be involved."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1397"	" At some point, my mom moved to a separate bedroom in the house, and from then on, they were married in name only, not even cohabiting but coexisting. That state of affairs lasted a year, maybe two. Andrew had turned nine, and in my world, I was counting down until he turned eighteen, thinking that would finally free my mom from this abusive man."	"At some point, my mom moved to a separate bedroom in the house, and from then on, they were married in name only, not even cohabiting but coexisting. That state of affairs lasted a year, maybe two. Andrew had turned nine, and in my world, I was counting down until he turned eighteen, thinking that would finally free my mom from this abusive man."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1398"	" Then, one afternoon, my mom called and asked me to come by the house. A few hours later, I popped by."	"Then, one afternoon, my mom called and asked me to come by the house. A few hours later, I popped by."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1399"	" Trevor, she said, I'm pregnant. Sorry, what? I'm pregnant. What? Good lord, I was furious. I was so angry."	"Trevor, she said, I'm pregnant. Sorry, what? I'm pregnant. What? Good lord, I was furious. I was so angry."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"14.2"	" the professor played chess with the white man."	"the professor played chess with the white man."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"140.01"	" It was an exhilarating time, but still dangerous."	"It was an exhilarating time, but still dangerous."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"140.02"	" Sometimes the restaurants and clubs would get shut down, sometimes not."	"Sometimes the restaurants and clubs would get shut down, sometimes not."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"140.03"	" Sometimes the performers and patrons would get arrested, sometimes not. It was a roll of the dice."	"Sometimes the performers and patrons would get arrested, sometimes not. It was a roll of the dice."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"140.05"	" Neighbors would report on one another. The girlfriends of the white men in my mom's block of flats had every reason to report a black woman."	"Neighbors would report on one another. The girlfriends of the white men in my mom's block of flats had every reason to report a black woman."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"140.06"	" a prostitute, no doubt, living among them."	"a prostitute, no doubt, living among them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"140"	" It was an exhilarating time, but still dangerous. Sometimes the restaurants and clubs would get shut down. Sometimes not. Sometimes the performers and patrons would get arrested. Sometimes not. It was a roll of the dice. My mother never knew whom to trust. Who might turn her into the police. Neighbors would report on one another. The girlfriends of the white men in my mom's block of flats had every reason to report a black woman. A prostitute, no doubt, living among them."	"It was an exhilarating time, but still dangerous. Sometimes the restaurants and clubs would get shut down. Sometimes not. Sometimes the performers and patrons would get arrested. Sometimes not. It was a roll of the dice. My mother never knew whom to trust. Who might turn her into the police. Neighbors would report on one another. The girlfriends of the white men in my mom's block of flats had every reason to report a black woman. A prostitute, no doubt, living among them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1400"	" She herself seemed resolute, as determined as ever, but with an undertone of sadness I had never seen before. Like the news had devastated her at first, but she'd since reconciled herself to the reality of it. How could you let this happen?"	"She herself seemed resolute, as determined as ever, but with an undertone of sadness I had never seen before. Like the news had devastated her at first, but she'd since reconciled herself to the reality of it. How could you let this happen?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1402"	" I don't do anything by mistake. There's nothing I give you that you cannot handle. I'm pregnant for a reason. I know what kind of kids I can make. I know what kind of sons I can raise. I can raise this child. I will raise this child."	"I don't do anything by mistake. There's nothing I give you that you cannot handle. I'm pregnant for a reason. I know what kind of kids I can make. I know what kind of sons I can raise. I can raise this child. I will raise this child."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1403"	" Nine months later, Isaac was born. She called him Isaac because in the Bible, Sarah gets pregnant when she's like 100 years old and she's not supposed to be having children and that's what she names her son."	"Nine months later, Isaac was born. She called him Isaac because in the Bible, Sarah gets pregnant when she's like  one hundred  years old and she's not supposed to be having children and that's what she names her son."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1404"	" Isaac's birth pushed me even further away. I visited less and less. Then I popped by one afternoon and the house was in chaos. Police cars out front. The aftermath of another fight. He'd hit her with a bicycle. Abel had been berating one of his workers in the yard and my mom had tried to get between them. Abel was furious that she'd contradicted him in front of an employee. So he picked up Andrew's bike and he"	"Isaac's birth pushed me even further away. I visited less and less. Then I popped by one afternoon and the house was in chaos. Police cars out front. The aftermath of another fight. He'd hit her with a bicycle. Abel had been berating one of his workers in the yard and my mom had tried to get between them. Abel was furious that she'd contradicted him in front of an employee. So he picked up Andrew's bike and he."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1405"	" That time, I confronted him. I was big enough now."	"That time, I confronted him. I was big enough now."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1407"	" He was apologetic. He always was. He didn't puff out his chest and get defensive or anything like that. I know, he said. I'm sorry."	"He was apologetic. He always was. He didn't puff out his chest and get defensive or anything like that. I know, he said. I'm sorry."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1408"	" I don't like doing these things. But you know how your mom is. She can talk a lot. And she doesn't listen. I feel like your mom doesn't respect me sometimes. She came and disrespected me in front of my workers. I can't have these other men looking at me like I don't know how to control my wife."	"I don't like doing these things. But you know how your mom is. She can talk a lot. And she doesn't listen. I feel like your mom doesn't respect me sometimes. She came and disrespected me in front of my workers. I can't have these other men looking at me like I don't know how to control my wife."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1409"	" After the bicycle, my mom hired contractors she knew through the real estate business to build her a separate house in the backyard, like a little servant's quarters, and she moved in there with Isaac. This is the most insane thing I've ever seen, I told her. This is all I can do, she said. The police won't help me. The government won't protect me. Only my God can protect me. But what I can do is use against him the one thing that he cherishes. And that is his pride."	"After the bicycle, my mom hired contractors she knew through the real estate business to build her a separate house in the backyard, like a little servant's quarters, and she moved in there with Isaac. This is the most insane thing I've ever seen, I told her. This is all I can do, she said. The police won't help me. The government won't protect me. Only my God can protect me. But what I can do is use against him the one thing that he cherishes. And that is his pride."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"141"	" And you must remember that black people worked for the government as well. As far as her white neighbors knew, my mom could have been a spy posing as a prostitute, posing as a maid, sent into Hillbrow to inform on whites who were breaking the law. That's how a police state works. Everyone thinks everyone else is the police."	"And you must remember that black people worked for the government as well. As far as her white neighbors knew, my mom could have been a spy posing as a prostitute, posing as a maid, sent into Hillbrow to inform on whites who were breaking the law. That's how a police state works. Everyone thinks everyone else is the police."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1410.02"	" I was so close to writing her off."	"I was so close to writing her off."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1410.03"	" I couldn't stand the pain anymore."	"I couldn't stand the pain anymore."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1410.04"	" but seeing her hit with a bicycle, living like a prisoner in her own backyard,"	"but seeing her hit with a bicycle, living like a prisoner in her own backyard,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1410.05"	" That was the final straw for me. I was a broken person."	"That was the final straw for me. I was a broken person."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1410.07"	" This thing I told her."	"This thing I told her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1410.08"	" This dysfunctional thing? I won't be a part of it. I can't live this life with you. I refuse. You've made your decision. Good luck with your life. I'm going to live mine."	"This dysfunctional thing? I won't be a part of it. I can't live this life with you. I refuse. You've made your decision. Good luck with your life. I'm going to live mine."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1410"	" When my mom had decided to keep Isaac, I was so close to writing her off. I couldn't stand the pain anymore. But seeing her hit with a bicycle, living like a prisoner in her own backyard, that was the final straw for me. I was a broken person. I was done. This thing, I told her. This dysfunctional thing? I won't be a part of it. I can't live this life with you. I refuse. You've made your decision. Good luck with your life. I'm going to live."	"When my mom had decided to keep Isaac, I was so close to writing her off. I couldn't stand the pain anymore. But seeing her hit with a bicycle, living like a prisoner in her own backyard, that was the final straw for me. I was a broken person. I was done. This thing, I told her. This dysfunctional thing? I won't be a part of it. I can't live this life with you. I refuse. You've made your decision. Good luck with your life. I'm going to live."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1411"	" She understood. She didn't feel betrayed or abandoned at all."	"She understood. She didn't feel betrayed or abandoned at all."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1413"	" So I did. I walked out. I didn't call. I didn't visit. Isaac came and I went. And for the life of me, I could not understand why she wouldn't do the same. Leave. Just leave. Just fucking leave."	"So I did. I walked out. I didn't call. I didn't visit. Isaac came and I went. And for the life of me, I could not understand why she wouldn't do the same. Leave. Just leave. Just fucking leave."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1414"	" I didn't understand what she was going through. I didn't understand domestic violence. I didn't understand how adult relationships worked. I'd never even had a girlfriend. I didn't understand how she could have sex with a man she hated and feared. I didn't know how easily sex and hatred and fear can intertwine."	"I didn't understand what she was going through. I didn't understand domestic violence. I didn't understand how adult relationships worked. I'd never even had a girlfriend. I didn't understand how she could have sex with a man she hated and feared. I didn't know how easily sex and hatred and fear can intertwine."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1415"	" I was angry with my mom. I hated him, but I blamed her. I saw Abel as a choice she'd made, a choice she was continuing to make."	"I was angry with my mom. I hated him, but I blamed her. I saw Abel as a choice she'd made, a choice she was continuing to make."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1416"	" My whole life, telling me stories about growing up in the homelands, being abandoned by her parents, she had always said, you cannot blame anyone else for what you do. You cannot blame your past for who you are. You are responsible for you. You make your own choices."	"My whole life, telling me stories about growing up in the homelands, being abandoned by her parents, she had always said, you cannot blame anyone else for what you do. You cannot blame your past for who you are. You are responsible for you. You make your own choices."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1418"	" victims of apartheid, victims of abuse. But I was never allowed to think that way. And I didn't see her life that way. Cutting my father out of our lives to pacify Abel, that was her choice. Supporting Abel's workshop was her choice. Isaac was her choice. She had the money, not him. She wasn't dependent. So in my mind, she was the one making the decision."	"victims of apartheid, victims of abuse. But I was never allowed to think that way. And I didn't see her life that way. Cutting my father out of our lives to pacify Abel, that was her choice. Supporting Abel's workshop was her choice. Isaac was her choice. She had the money, not him. She wasn't dependent. So in my mind, she was the one making the decision."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1419"	" It is so easy from the outside to put the blame on the woman and say, you just need to leave."	"It is so easy from the outside to put the blame on the woman and say, you just need to leave."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"142"	" Living alone in the city, not being trusted and not being able to trust, my mother started spending more and more time in the company of someone with whom she felt safe. The tall, Swiss man downed the corridor in 206. He was 46. She was 24. He was quiet and reserved. She was wild and free."	"Living alone in the city, not being trusted and not being able to trust, my mother started spending more and more time in the company of someone with whom she felt safe. The tall, Swiss man downed the corridor in  two hundred and six . He was  forty six . She was  twenty four . He was quiet and reserved. She was wild and free."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1420"	" It's not like my home was the only home where there was domestic abuse. It's what I grew up around. I saw it in the streets of Soweto, on TV, in movies. Where does a woman go in a society where that is the norm? When the police won't help her. When her own family won't help her."	"It's not like my home was the only home where there was domestic abuse. It's what I grew up around. I saw it in the streets of Soweto, on TV, in movies. Where does a woman go in a society where that is the norm? When the police won't help her. When her own family won't help her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1422"	" But I didn't comprehend any of that at the time. I was a boy with a boy's understanding of things. I distinctly remember the last time we argued about it too. It was some time after the bicycle or when she was moving into her shack in the backyard. I was going off begging her for the thousandth time."	"But I didn't comprehend any of that at the time. I was a boy with a boy's understanding of things. I distinctly remember the last time we argued about it too. It was some time after the bicycle or when she was moving into her shack in the backyard. I was going off begging her for the thousandth time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1423"	" Why? Why don't you just leave?"	"Why? Why don't you just leave?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1424"	" She shook her head. Oh baby. No, no, no, I can't leave. Why not? Because if I leave, he'll kill us."	"She shook her head. Oh baby. No, no, no, I can't leave. Why not? Because if I leave, he'll kill us."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1425"	" She wasn't being dramatic. She didn't raise her voice. She said it's totally calm and matter of fact. And I never asked that question again."	"She wasn't being dramatic. She didn't raise her voice. She said it's totally calm and matter of fact. And I never asked that question again."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1427"	" But one day, she bought another house in Highlands North, met someone new and moved on with her life."	"But one day, she bought another house in Highlands North, met someone new and moved on with her life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1428"	" Andrew and Isaac still saw their dad, who by that point was just existing in the world. Still going through the same cycle of drinking and fighting. Still living in a house paid for by his ex-wife."	"Andrew and Isaac still saw their dad, who by that point was just existing in the world. Still going through the same cycle of drinking and fighting. Still living in a house paid for by his ex wife."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1429"	" Years passed. Life carried on."	"Years passed. Life carried on."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"143"	" She would stop by his flat to chat, they'd go to underground get-togethers, go dancing at the nightclub with the rotating dance floor. Something clicked."	"She would stop by his flat to chat, they'd go to underground get togethers, go dancing at the nightclub with the rotating dance floor. Something clicked."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1431"	" It was on a Sunday. I know it was a Sunday because everyone else in the family had gone to church. And I, quite happily, had not. The days of endlessly schlepping back and forth to church were no longer my problem. And I was lazily sleeping in."	"It was on a Sunday. I know it was a Sunday because everyone else in the family had gone to church. And I, quite happily, had not. The days of endlessly schlepping back and forth to church were no longer my problem. And I was lazily sleeping in."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1432"	" The irony of my life is that whenever church is involved is when shit goes wrong. Like getting kidnapped by violent minibus drivers. I'd always teased my mom about that too. This church thing of yours, all this Jesus, what good has come of it?"	"The irony of my life is that whenever church is involved is when shit goes wrong. Like getting kidnapped by violent minibus drivers. I'd always teased my mom about that too. This church thing of yours, all this Jesus, what good has come of it?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1433"	" I looked over at my phone. It was flashing my mom's number."	"I looked over at my phone. It was flashing my mom's number."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1434"	" But when I answered, it was Andrew on the other end. He sounded perfectly calm. Hey Trevor, it's Andrew. Hey, how are you? Good, what's up? Are you busy? I'm sort of sleeping, why? Mom's been shot."	"But when I answered, it was Andrew on the other end. He sounded perfectly calm. Hey Trevor, it's Andrew. Hey, how are you? Good, what's up? Are you busy? I'm sort of sleeping, why? Mom's been shot."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1436"	" First, why would he ask me if I was busy? Let's start there. When your mom's been shot, the first line out of your mouth should be, mom's been shot. Not, how are you? Not, are you busy? That confused me. The second weird thing was when he said, mom's been shot? I didn't ask who shot her. I didn't have to. He said, mom's been shot and my mind automatically filled in the rest."	"First, why would he ask me if I was busy? Let's start there. When your mom's been shot, the first line out of your mouth should be, mom's been shot. Not, how are you? Not, are you busy? That confused me. The second weird thing was when he said, mom's been shot? I didn't ask who shot her. I didn't have to. He said, mom's been shot and my mind automatically filled in the rest."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1437"	" and then he shot her in the head."	"and then he shot her in the head."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1438"	" When he said that, my body just let go."	"When he said that, my body just let go."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1439"	" I remember the exact traffic light I was at."	"I remember the exact traffic light I was at."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1440"	" For a moment, there was a complete vacuum of sound. And then I cried tears like I have never cried before."	"For a moment, there was a complete vacuum of sound. And then I cried tears like I have never cried before."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1441"	" I collapsed in heaving sobs and moans."	"I collapsed in heaving sobs and moans."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1442"	" I cried as if every other thing I'd cried for in my life had been a waste of crying."	"I cried as if every other thing I'd cried for in my life had been a waste of crying."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1443"	" I cried so hard that if my present crying self could go back in time and see my other crying selves, it would slap them and say, that shit's not worth crying for. My cry was not a cry of sadness. It was not catharsis. It wasn't me feeling sorry for myself."	"I cried so hard that if my present crying self could go back in time and see my other crying selves, it would slap them and say, that shit's not worth crying for. My cry was not a cry of sadness. It was not catharsis. It wasn't me feeling sorry for myself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1445"	" She was my mom. She was my teammate. It had always been me and her together. Me and her against the world."	"She was my mom. She was my teammate. It had always been me and her together. Me and her against the world."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1446"	" When Andrew said, shut her in the head, I broke in two."	"When Andrew said, shut her in the head, I broke in two."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1447"	" The light changed. I couldn't even see the road, but I drove through the tears, thinking, just get there. Just get there. Just get there. We pulled up to the hospital and I jumped out of the car. There was an outdoor sitting area by the entrance to the emergency room. Andrew was standing there waiting for me. Alone, his clothes smeared with blood. He still looked perfectly calm, completely stoic. Then, the moment he looked up and saw me,"	"The light changed. I couldn't even see the road, but I drove through the tears, thinking, just get there. Just get there. Just get there. We pulled up to the hospital and I jumped out of the car. There was an outdoor sitting area by the entrance to the emergency room. Andrew was standing there waiting for me. Alone, his clothes smeared with blood. He still looked perfectly calm, completely stoic. Then, the moment he looked up and saw me,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1448"	" I turned and ran into the emergency room. My mom was there in triage on a gurney. The doctors were stabilizing her. Her whole body was soaked in blood. There was a hole in her face, a gaping wound above her lip, part of her nose, gone. She was as calm and serene as I'd ever seen her. She could still open one eye, and she turned and looked up at me and saw the look of horror on my face."	"I turned and ran into the emergency room. My mom was there in triage on a gurney. The doctors were stabilizing her. Her whole body was soaked in blood. There was a hole in her face, a gaping wound above her lip, part of her nose, gone. She was as calm and serene as I'd ever seen her. She could still open one eye, and she turned and looked up at me and saw the look of horror on my face."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"145.01"	" I want to have a kid, she told him."	"I want to have a kid, she told him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"145.02"	" I don't want kids,  he said."	"I don't want kids,  he said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"145.03"	" I didn't ask you to have a kid. I asked you to help me to have my kid."	"I didn't ask you to have a kid. I asked you to help me to have my kid."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"145.04"	" I just want the sperm from you."	"I just want the sperm from you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"145.06"	" We don't do such things."	"We don't do such things."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"145.07"	" You do know, she replied, that I could sleep with you and go away and you would never know if you had a child or not, but I don't want that."	"You do know, she replied, that I could sleep with you and go away and you would never know if you had a child or not, but I don't want that."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"145.08"	" Honor me with your yes so that I can live peacefully. I want a child of my own, and I want it from you."	"Honor me with your yes so that I can live peacefully. I want a child of my own, and I want it from you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"145.09"	" You will be able to see it as much as you like, but you will have no obligations. You don't have to talk to it. You don't have to pay for it. Just make this child for me."	"You will be able to see it as much as you like, but you will have no obligations. You don't have to talk to it. You don't have to pay for it. Just make this child for me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1450"	" They were coming home from church. A big group. My mom and Andrew and Isaac. Her new husband and his children and a whole bunch of his extended family. Aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews. They had just pulled into the driveway when Abel pulled up and got out of his car. He had his gun. He looked right at my mother. You've stolen my life, he said. You've taken everything away from me. Now I'm going to kill all of you."	"They were coming home from church. A big group. My mom and Andrew and Isaac. Her new husband and his children and a whole bunch of his extended family. Aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews. They had just pulled into the driveway when Abel pulled up and got out of his car. He had his gun. He looked right at my mother. You've stolen my life, he said. You've taken everything away from me. Now I'm going to kill all of you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1451"	" Andrew stepped in front of his father. He stepped right in front of the gun. Don't do this, Dad. Please. You're drunk. Just put the gun away. Abel looked down at his son. No, he said. I'm killing everybody. And if you don't walk away, I will shoot you first. Andrew stepped aside."	"Andrew stepped in front of his father. He stepped right in front of the gun. Don't do this, Dad. Please. You're drunk. Just put the gun away. Abel looked down at his son. No, he said. I'm killing everybody. And if you don't walk away, I will shoot you first. Andrew stepped aside."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1452"	" His eyes were not lying, he told me. He had the eyes of the devil. In that moment, I could tell my father was gone."	"His eyes were not lying, he told me. He had the eyes of the devil. In that moment, I could tell my father was gone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1453"	" For all the pain I felt that day, in hindsight, I have to imagine that Andrew's pain was far greater than mine."	"For all the pain I felt that day, in hindsight, I have to imagine that Andrew's pain was far greater than mine."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.001"	" Isaac was only four years old."	"Isaac was only four years old."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.002"	" He didn't fully comprehend what was happening and as Andrew stepped aside, Isaac started crying."	"He didn't fully comprehend what was happening and as Andrew stepped aside, Isaac started crying."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.003"	" Daddy, what are you doing? Daddy? What are you doing?"	"Daddy, what are you doing? Daddy? What are you doing?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.004-2"	" Isaac ran over to Andrew and Andrew held him. Then Abel raised his gun and he started shooting."	"Isaac ran over to Andrew and Andrew held him. Then Abel raised his gun and he started shooting."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.005"	" My mother jumped in front of the gun to protect everyone. And that's when she took the first bullets. Not in her leg, but in her butt cheek. She collapsed, and as she fell to the ground, she screamed, Run!"	"My mother jumped in front of the gun to protect everyone. And that's when she took the first bullets. Not in her leg, but in her butt cheek. She collapsed, and as she fell to the ground, she screamed, Run!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.006"	" Abel kept shooting and everyone ran. They scattered. My mom was struggling to get back to her feet when Abel walked up and stood over her."	"Abel kept shooting and everyone ran. They scattered. My mom was struggling to get back to her feet when Abel walked up and stood over her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.007"	" He pointed the gun at her head, point blank, execution style."	"He pointed the gun at her head, point blank, execution style."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.008"	" Then he pulled the trigger."	"Then he pulled the trigger."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.010"	" Abel stopped to see what was wrong with the gun. My mother jumped up in a panic. She shoved him aside, ran for the car, jumped into the driver's seat."	"Abel stopped to see what was wrong with the gun. My mother jumped up in a panic. She shoved him aside, ran for the car, jumped into the driver's seat."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.011"	" Andrew ran behind and jumped into the passenger seat next to her. Just as she turned the ignition, Andrew heard one last gunshot and the windshield went red."	"Andrew ran behind and jumped into the passenger seat next to her. Just as she turned the ignition, Andrew heard one last gunshot and the windshield went red."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.012"	" Abel had fired from behind the car."	"Abel had fired from behind the car."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.013"	" The bullets went into the back of her head and exited through the front of her face, and blood sprayed everywhere."	"The bullets went into the back of her head and exited through the front of her face, and blood sprayed everywhere."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.015"	" Andrew, reacting without thinking, pulled my mom to the passenger side."	"Andrew, reacting without thinking, pulled my mom to the passenger side."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1455.016"	" flipped over her, jumped into the driver's seat, slammed the coin to gear and raced to the hospital in Lynxfield."	"flipped over her, jumped into the driver's seat, slammed the coin to gear and raced to the hospital in Lynxfield."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1456"	" I asked Andrew what happened to Abel. He didn't know. I was filled with rage, but there was nothing I could do. I felt completely impotent, but I still felt I had to do something. So I took out my phone and I called him."	"I asked Andrew what happened to Abel. He didn't know. I was filled with rage, but there was nothing I could do. I felt completely impotent, but I still felt I had to do something. So I took out my phone and I called him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1457"	" I called the man who just shot my mom and he actually picked up."	"I called the man who just shot my mom and he actually picked up."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1459"	" You killed my mom."	"You killed my mom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"146"	" For my mother's parts, the fact that this man didn't particularly want a family with her, was prevented by law from having a family with her, was part of the attraction. She wanted a child, not a man stepping in to run her life."	"For my mother's parts, the fact that this man didn't particularly want a family with her, was prevented by law from having a family with her, was part of the attraction. She wanted a child, not a man stepping in to run her life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1460"	" Yes, I did. You killed my mom? Yes. And if I could find you, I would kill you as well."	"Yes, I did. You killed my mom? Yes. And if I could find you, I would kill you as well."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1461"	" Then he hung up."	"Then he hung up."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1463"	" Whatever nerve I'd worked up to call him, I immediately lost. To this day, I don't know what I was thinking. I don't know what I expected to happen. I was just enraged. I kept asking Andrew questions, trying to get more details. Then, as we were talking, a nurse came outside looking for me."	"Whatever nerve I'd worked up to call him, I immediately lost. To this day, I don't know what I was thinking. I don't know what I expected to happen. I was just enraged. I kept asking Andrew questions, trying to get more details. Then, as we were talking, a nurse came outside looking for me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1464"	" She didn't. As it turned out, a few months prior, she decided, this health insurance is a scam. I never get sick. I'm going to cancel it. So now, she had no health insurance. We can't treat your mother here, the nurse said. If she doesn't have insurance, we have to send her to a state hospital. State hospital? What? No, you can't. My mom's been shot in the head. You're going to put her back on a gurney? Send her out in an ambulance? She'll die."	"She didn't. As it turned out, a few months prior, she decided, this health insurance is a scam. I never get sick. I'm going to cancel it. So now, she had no health insurance. We can't treat your mother here, the nurse said. If she doesn't have insurance, we have to send her to a state hospital. State hospital? What? No, you can't. My mom's been shot in the head. You're going to put her back on a gurney? Send her out in an ambulance? She'll die."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.01"	" Sir, we can't. We need a form of payment."	"Sir, we can't. We need a form of payment."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.02"	" I'm your form of payment, I'll pay!"	"I'm your form of payment, I'll pay!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.04"	" I pulled out my credit card."	"I pulled out my credit card."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.05"	" Here, I said."	"Here, I said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.06"	" Take this, I'll pay, I'll pay for everything."	"Take this, I'll pay, I'll pay for everything."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.07"	" Sir, hospital can be very expensive."	"Sir, hospital can be very expensive."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.09"	" Sir, I don't think you understand."	"Sir, I don't think you understand."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.10"	" Hospital can be really expensive."	"Hospital can be really expensive."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.11"	" Lady, I have money. I'll pay anything. Just help us."	"Lady, I have money. I'll pay anything. Just help us."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.12"	" Sir, you don't understand."	"Sir, you don't understand."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.14"	" Three thousand... What? Lady, this is my mother's life we're talking about. I'll pay!"	"Three thousand... What? Lady, this is my mother's life we're talking about. I'll pay!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.15"	" So you don't understand, your mother has been shot in her brain. She'll be in the ICU. One night in ICU could cost you 15, 20,000 rand."	"So you don't understand, your mother has been shot in her brain. She'll be in the ICU. One night in ICU could cost you  fifteen ,  twenty , zero  rand."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.16"	" Lady, are you not listening to me? This is my mother's life. This is her life. Take the money. Take all of it. I don't care."	"Lady, are you not listening to me? This is my mother's life. This is her life. Take the money. Take all of it. I don't care."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1465.17"	" Sir, you don't understand. I've seen this happen. Your mother could be in the ICU for weeks. This could cost you 500,000, 600,000, maybe even millions. You'll be in debt for the rest of your life."	"Sir, you don't understand. I've seen this happen. Your mother could be in the ICU for weeks. This could cost you  five hundred , zero ,  six hundred , zero , maybe even millions. You'll be in debt for the rest of your life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1466"	" I'm not going to lie to you, I paused. I paused hard in that moment."	"I'm not going to lie to you, I paused. I paused hard in that moment."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1467"	" What I heard the nurse saying was, all of your money will be gone. And then I started to think, well, what is she, 50? That's pretty good, right? She's lived a good life."	"What I heard the nurse saying was, all of your money will be gone. And then I started to think, well, what is she,  fifty ? That's pretty good, right? She's lived a good life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1468"	" I genuinely did not know what to do. I stared at the nurse as the shock of what she'd said sunk in. My mind raced through a dozen different scenarios."	"I genuinely did not know what to do. I stared at the nurse as the shock of what she'd said sunk in. My mind raced through a dozen different scenarios."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1469"	" What if I spend that money? And then she dies anyway."	"What if I spend that money? And then she dies anyway."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1470"	" Do I get a refund? I actually imagined my mother, as frugal as she was, waking up from a co-man saying, you spent how much? You idiot! You should have saved that money to look after your brothers! And what about my brothers? They would be my responsibility now. I would have to raise the family, which I couldn't do if I was millions in debt. And it was always my mother's solemn vow that raising my brother was the one thing I would never have to do."	"Do I get a refund? I actually imagined my mother, as frugal as she was, waking up from a co man saying, you spent how much? You idiot! You should have saved that money to look after your brothers! And what about my brothers? They would be my responsibility now. I would have to raise the family, which I couldn't do if I was millions in debt. And it was always my mother's solemn vow that raising my brother was the one thing I would never have to do."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1471"	" My mother's greatest fear was that I would end up paying the black tax, that I would get trapped by the cycle of poverty and violence that came before me."	"My mother's greatest fear was that I would end up paying the black tax, that I would get trapped by the cycle of poverty and violence that came before me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1472"	" She had always promised me that I would be the one to break the cycle. I would be the one to move forward and not back. And as I looked at that nurse outside the emergency room, I was petrified that the moment I handed her my credit card, the cycle would just continue and I'd get sucked right back in."	"She had always promised me that I would be the one to break the cycle. I would be the one to move forward and not back. And as I looked at that nurse outside the emergency room, I was petrified that the moment I handed her my credit card, the cycle would just continue and I'd get sucked right back in."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1473"	" People say all the time that they do anything for the people they love."	"People say all the time that they do anything for the people they love."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1475"	" Would you give everything? I don't know that a child knows that kind of selfless love. A mother, yes. A mother will clutch her children and jump from a moving car to keep them from harm. She will do it without thinking."	"Would you give everything? I don't know that a child knows that kind of selfless love. A mother, yes. A mother will clutch her children and jump from a moving car to keep them from harm. She will do it without thinking."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1476"	" But I don't think the child knows how to do that. Not instinctively. It's something the child has to learn."	"But I don't think the child knows how to do that. Not instinctively. It's something the child has to learn."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1477"	" I pressed my credit card into the nurse's hand. Do whatever you have to do. Just please help my mom."	"I pressed my credit card into the nurse's hand. Do whatever you have to do. Just please help my mom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1478"	" We spent the rest of the day in limbo, waiting, not knowing, pacing around the hospital, family members stopping by."	"We spent the rest of the day in limbo, waiting, not knowing, pacing around the hospital, family members stopping by."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"148"	" Nine months after that, yes. On February 20th, 1984, my mother checked into Hillbrow Hospital for a scheduled C-section delivery. Estranged from her family, pregnant by a man she could not be seen with in public, she was alone. The doctors took her up to the delivery room, cut open her belly, and reached in and pulled out a half-white, half-black child who violated any number of laws, statutes, and regulations. I was born a crime."	"Nine months after that, yes. On February  twenty th,  one thousand, nine hundred and eighty four , my mother checked into Hillbrow Hospital for a scheduled C section delivery. Estranged from her family, pregnant by a man she could not be seen with in public, she was alone. The doctors took her up to the delivery room, cut open her belly, and reached in and pulled out a half white, half black child who violated any number of laws, statutes, and regulations. I was born a crime."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1480"	" What's happening? I asked."	"What's happening? I asked."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1481"	" Your mother is stable, he said. She's out of surgery. Is she going to be okay?"	"Your mother is stable, he said. She's out of surgery. Is she going to be okay?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1482"	" He thought for a moment about what he was going to say."	"He thought for a moment about what he was going to say."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1484"	" But what happened to your mother today was a miracle. I never say that because I hate it when people say it, but I don't have any other way to explain this."	"But what happened to your mother today was a miracle. I never say that because I hate it when people say it, but I don't have any other way to explain this."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1485"	" The bullet that hit my mother in the butt, he said, was a through and through. It went in, came out, and didn't do any real damage. The other bullet went through the back of her head, entering below the skull at the top of her neck. It missed the spinal cord by her hair, missed the medulla oblongata, and traveled through her head just underneath the brain, missing every major vein, artery, and nerve. With the trajectory the bullet was on, it was headed straight for her left"	"The bullet that hit my mother in the butt, he said, was a through and through. It went in, came out, and didn't do any real damage. The other bullet went through the back of her head, entering below the skull at the top of her neck. It missed the spinal cord by her hair, missed the medulla oblongata, and traveled through her head just underneath the brain, missing every major vein, artery, and nerve. With the trajectory the bullet was on, it was headed straight for her left."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1486"	" On the gurney in the emergency room, the blood had made the wound look much worse than it was. The bullets took off only a tiny flap of skin on the side of her nostril and it came out clean with no bullet fragments left inside. She didn't even need surgery. They stopped the bleeding, stitched her up in back, stitched her up in front and let her heal."	"On the gurney in the emergency room, the blood had made the wound look much worse than it was. The bullets took off only a tiny flap of skin on the side of her nostril and it came out clean with no bullet fragments left inside. She didn't even need surgery. They stopped the bleeding, stitched her up in back, stitched her up in front and let her heal."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1487"	" There was nothing we can do because there's nothing we need to do,  the doctor said."	"There was nothing we can do because there's nothing we need to do,  the doctor said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1489"	" She was back at work in Seven."	"She was back at work in Seven."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"149"	" When the doctors pulled me out, there was an awkward moment where they said, huh, that's a very light-skinned baby."	"When the doctors pulled me out, there was an awkward moment where they said, huh, that's a very light skinned baby."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1490"	" The doctors kept her sedated the rest of that day and night to rest. They told all of us to go home. She's stable, they said. There's nothing you can do here. Go home and sleep."	"The doctors kept her sedated the rest of that day and night to rest. They told all of us to go home. She's stable, they said. There's nothing you can do here. Go home and sleep."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1491"	" So we did."	"So we did."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1493"	" When I walked in, she was still asleep. The back of her head was bandaged. She had stitches in her face and gauze covering her nose and her left eye. She looked frail and weak, tired."	"When I walked in, she was still asleep. The back of her head was bandaged. She had stitches in her face and gauze covering her nose and her left eye. She looked frail and weak, tired."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1494"	" one of the few times in my life I'd ever seen her look that way."	"one of the few times in my life I'd ever seen her look that way."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1495"	" I sat close by her bed holding her hand, waiting and watching her breathe, a flood of thoughts going through my mind."	"I sat close by her bed holding her hand, waiting and watching her breathe, a flood of thoughts going through my mind."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1496"	" I was still afraid I was going to lose her. I was angry at myself for not being there. Angry at the police for all the times they didn't arrest Abel. I told myself I should have killed him years ago, which was ridiculous to think because I'm not capable of killing anyone. But I thought it anyway. I was angry at the world. Angry at God. Because all my mom does is pray. If there's a fan club for Jesus, my mom is definitely in the top 100."	"I was still afraid I was going to lose her. I was angry at myself for not being there. Angry at the police for all the times they didn't arrest Abel. I told myself I should have killed him years ago, which was ridiculous to think because I'm not capable of killing anyone. But I thought it anyway. I was angry at the world. Angry at God. Because all my mom does is pray. If there's a fan club for Jesus, my mom is definitely in the top  one hundred ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1498"	" She said, don't cry baby. Don't cry."	"She said, don't cry baby. Don't cry."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1499"	" How can I not cry, mom?"	"How can I not cry, mom?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"15.1"	" For a long time, neither was particularly successful, and each blamed the other for a problem neither had created."	"For a long time, neither was particularly successful, and each blamed the other for a problem neither had created."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"15.2"	" Bitterness fested."	"Bitterness fested."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"15.4"	" Then apartheid fell, Mandela walked free and black South Africa went to war with itself."	"Then apartheid fell, Mandela walked free and black South Africa went to war with itself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"150"	" A quick scan of the delivery room revealed no man standing around to take credits."	"A quick scan of the delivery room revealed no man standing around to take credits."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1500"	" You almost died."	"You almost died."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1501"	" No."	"No."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1503"	" But I thought you were dead."	"But I thought you were dead."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1504"	" I kept bawling and bawling. I thought I'd lost you."	"I kept bawling and bawling. I thought I'd lost you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1505"	" No, baby. Baby, don't cry. Trevor? Trevor, listen. Listen to me. Listen. What? I said. Tears streaming down my face."	"No, baby. Baby, don't cry. Trevor? Trevor, listen. Listen to me. Listen. What? I said. Tears streaming down my face."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1506"	" My child."	"My child."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1508"	" What are you talking about, the bright side? Mom, you were shot in the face. There's no bright side."	"What are you talking about, the bright side? Mom, you were shot in the face. There's no bright side."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1509"	" Of course there is. Now, you're officially the best looking person in the family. She broke out in a huge smile and started laughing. Through my tears I started laughing too. I was bawling my eyes out and laughing hysterically at the same time."	"Of course there is. Now, you're officially the best looking person in the family. She broke out in a huge smile and started laughing. Through my tears I started laughing too. I was bawling my eyes out and laughing hysterically at the same time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"151"	" Who is the father? They asked. His father is from Swaziland, my mother said, referring to the tiny landlocked kingdom in the west of South Africa."	"Who is the father? They asked. His father is from Swaziland, my mother said, referring to the tiny landlocked kingdom in the west of South Africa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1510"	" We sat there and she squeezed my hand, and we cracked each other up the way we always did. Mother and son, laughing together through the pain in an intensive care recovery room on a bright and sunny and beautiful day."	"We sat there and she squeezed my hand, and we cracked each other up the way we always did. Mother and son, laughing together through the pain in an intensive care recovery room on a bright and sunny and beautiful day."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1512"	" When Andrew sped off with my mom, leaving the four-year-old alone on the front lawn, Abel walked over to his youngest, picked him up, put the boy in his car, and drove away. As they drove, Isaac turned to his dad. Dad, why did you kill mom? he asked, at that point assuming, as we all did, that my mom was dead."	"When Andrew sped off with my mom, leaving the four year old alone on the front lawn, Abel walked over to his youngest, picked him up, put the boy in his car, and drove away. As they drove, Isaac turned to his dad. Dad, why did you kill mom? he asked, at that point assuming, as we all did, that my mom was dead."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1513"	" because I'm very unhappy,  Abel replied, because I'm very sad. Yeah, but you shouldn't kill mom. Where are we going now?"	"because I'm very unhappy,  Abel replied, because I'm very sad. Yeah, but you shouldn't kill mom. Where are we going now?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1514"	" I'm going to drop you off at your uncle's house. And where are you going? I'm going to kill myself. But don't kill yourself, Dad."	"I'm going to drop you off at your uncle's house. And where are you going? I'm going to kill myself. But don't kill yourself, Dad."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1515"	" No, I'm going to kill myself."	"No, I'm going to kill myself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1517"	" He spent that day and went to everyone, relatives and friends, and said his goodbyes. He even told people what he had done. This is what I've done. I've killed her."	"He spent that day and went to everyone, relatives and friends, and said his goodbyes. He even told people what he had done. This is what I've done. I've killed her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1518"	" And I'm now on the way to kill myself. Goodbye."	"And I'm now on the way to kill myself. Goodbye."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1519"	" He spent the whole day on this strange farewell tour until finally one of his cousins called him out. You need to man up, the cousin said. This is the coward's way. You need to turn yourself in. If you were men enough to do this, you have to be men enough to face the consequences."	"He spent the whole day on this strange farewell tour until finally one of his cousins called him out. You need to man up, the cousin said. This is the coward's way. You need to turn yourself in. If you were men enough to do this, you have to be men enough to face the consequences."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"152"	" They probably knew she was lying, but they accepted it, because they needed an explanation."	"They probably knew she was lying, but they accepted it, because they needed an explanation."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1521"	" He spent a couple of weeks in jail, waiting for a bail hearing. We filed a motion opposing bail because he'd shown that he was a threat. Since Andrew and Isaac were still minors, social workers started getting involved. We felt like the case was open and shut. But then one day, after a month or so, we got a call that he'd made bail. The great irony was that he got bail because he told the judge that if he was in jail, he couldn't earn money to support his kids. But he wasn't supportive."	"He spent a couple of weeks in jail, waiting for a bail hearing. We filed a motion opposing bail because he'd shown that he was a threat. Since Andrew and Isaac were still minors, social workers started getting involved. We felt like the case was open and shut. But then one day, after a month or so, we got a call that he'd made bail. The great irony was that he got bail because he told the judge that if he was in jail, he couldn't earn money to support his kids. But he wasn't supportive."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1522"	" So Abel was out. The case slowly ground its way through the legal system and everything went against us. Because of my mother's miraculous recovery, the charge was only attempted murder. And because no domestic violence charges had ever been filed, in all the times my mother had called the police to report him, Abel had no criminal record. He got a good lawyer who continued to lean on the court about the fact that he had children at home who needed him."	"So Abel was out. The case slowly ground its way through the legal system and everything went against us. Because of my mother's miraculous recovery, the charge was only attempted murder. And because no domestic violence charges had ever been filed, in all the times my mother had called the police to report him, Abel had no criminal record. He got a good lawyer who continued to lean on the court about the fact that he had children at home who needed him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1523"	" The final piece of the story came from my mom, who could only tell us her side after she woke up."	"The final piece of the story came from my mom, who could only tell us her side after she woke up."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1524"	" She remembered Abel pulling up and pointing the gun at Andrew. She remembered falling to the ground after getting shot in the ass. Then Abel came and stood over her and pointed his gun at her head. She looked up and looked at him straight down the barrel of the gun. Then she started to pray. And that's when the gun misfired. Then it misfired again. Then it misfired again and again."	"She remembered Abel pulling up and pointing the gun at Andrew. She remembered falling to the ground after getting shot in the ass. Then Abel came and stood over her and pointed his gun at her head. She looked up and looked at him straight down the barrel of the gun. Then she started to pray. And that's when the gun misfired. Then it misfired again. Then it misfired again and again."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1526"	" To this day, nobody can explain what happened. Even the police didn't understand. Because it wasn't like the gun didn't work. It fired, and then it didn't fire, and then it fired again for the final shots. Anyone who knows anything about firearms will tell you that a 9mm handgun cannot misfire in the way that gun did. But at the crime scene, the police had drawn little chalk circles all over the driveway, all with spent shell casings from the shots Abel fired. And then, these four bullets, intact,"	"To this day, nobody can explain what happened. Even the police didn't understand. Because it wasn't like the gun didn't work. It fired, and then it didn't fire, and then it fired again for the final shots. Anyone who knows anything about firearms will tell you that a  nine mm handgun cannot misfire in the way that gun did. But at the crime scene, the police had drawn little chalk circles all over the driveway, all with spent shell casings from the shots Abel fired. And then, these four bullets, intact,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1527"	" My mom's total hospital bill came to 50,000 rand. I paid it the day we left."	"My mom's total hospital bill came to  fifty , zero  rand. I paid it the day we left."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1528"	" For four days, we'd been in the hospital. Family members visiting, talking and hanging out, laughing and crying. As we packed up her things to leave, I was going on about how insane the whole week had been. You're lucky to be alive, I told her. I still can't believe you didn't have any health insurance. Oh, but I do have health insurance, she said. You do? Yes. Jesus. Jesus? Jesus. Jesus is your health insurance?"	"For four days, we'd been in the hospital. Family members visiting, talking and hanging out, laughing and crying. As we packed up her things to leave, I was going on about how insane the whole week had been. You're lucky to be alive, I told her. I still can't believe you didn't have any health insurance. Oh, but I do have health insurance, she said. You do? Yes. Jesus. Jesus? Jesus. Jesus is your health insurance?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1529"	" If God is with me, who can be against me? Okay, Mom."	"If God is with me, who can be against me? Okay, Mom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1530"	" Trevor, I prayed. I told you I prayed. I don't pray for nothing. You know, I said, for once I cannot argue with you. The gun, the bullets, I can't explain any of it. So I'll give you that much. Then I couldn't resist teasing her with one last little jab."	"Trevor, I prayed. I told you I prayed. I don't pray for nothing. You know, I said, for once I cannot argue with you. The gun, the bullets, I can't explain any of it. So I'll give you that much. Then I couldn't resist teasing her with one last little jab."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1531"	" But where was your Jesus to pay your hospital bill? Hmm? I know for a fact that he didn't pay that."	"But where was your Jesus to pay your hospital bill? Hmm? I know for a fact that he didn't pay that."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1532"	" She smiled and said, you're right, he didn't."	"She smiled and said, you're right, he didn't."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1533"	" But he blessed me with the son who did."	"But he blessed me with the son who did."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"1535"	" Audible hopes you have enjoyed this program."	"Audible hopes you have enjoyed this program."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"154"	" My mother lied and said I was born in Gangwaane, the semi-sovereign homeland for Swazi people living in South Africa."	"My mother lied and said I was born in Gangwaane, the semi sovereign homeland for Swazi people living in South Africa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"155"	" So my birth certificate doesn't say that I'm Cossa, which technically I am, and it doesn't say that I'm Swiss, which the government wouldn't allow. It just says that I'm from another country."	"So my birth certificate doesn't say that I'm Cossa, which technically I am, and it doesn't say that I'm Swiss, which the government wouldn't allow. It just says that I'm from another country."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"156"	" My father isn't on my birth certificate. Officially, he's never been my father. And my mother, true to her word, was prepared for him not to be involved. She'd rented a new flat for herself in Jubeir Park, the neighborhood adjacent to Hillbrow. And that's where she took me when she left the hospital."	"My father isn't on my birth certificate. Officially, he's never been my father. And my mother, true to her word, was prepared for him not to be involved. She'd rented a new flat for herself in Jubeir Park, the neighborhood adjacent to Hillbrow. And that's where she took me when she left the hospital."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"158"	" To her surprise, he asked where I was."	"To her surprise, he asked where I was."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"159"	" You said that you didn't want to be involved, she said. And he hadn't. But once I existed, he realized he couldn't have a son living around the corner and not be a part of my life."	"You said that you didn't want to be involved, she said. And he hadn't. But once I existed, he realized he couldn't have a son living around the corner and not be a part of my life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"16"	" 1. Run"	" one . Run."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"160"	" So the three of us formed a kind of family, as much as our peculiar situation would allow. I lived with my mom. We'd sneak around and visit my dad when we could."	"So the three of us formed a kind of family, as much as our peculiar situation would allow. I lived with my mom. We'd sneak around and visit my dad when we could."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"162"	" My mother tells me that once, when I was a toddler, my dad tried to go with us. We were in the park. He was walking a good bit away from us, and I ran after him screaming, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! People started looking. He panicked and ran away. I thought it was a game and kept chasing him."	"My mother tells me that once, when I was a toddler, my dad tried to go with us. We were in the park. He was walking a good bit away from us, and I ran after him screaming, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! People started looking. He panicked and ran away. I thought it was a game and kept chasing him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"163"	" I couldn't walk with my mother either. A light-skinned child with a black woman would raise too many questions. When I was a newborn, she could wrap me up and take me anywhere. But very quickly, that was no longer an option. I was a giant baby. An enormous child. When I was one, you would have thought I was two. When I was two, you'd have thought I was four. There was no way to hide me."	"I couldn't walk with my mother either. A light skinned child with a black woman would raise too many questions. When I was a newborn, she could wrap me up and take me anywhere. But very quickly, that was no longer an option. I was a giant baby. An enormous child. When I was one, you would have thought I was two. When I was two, you'd have thought I was four. There was no way to hide me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"164"	" My mom, same as she'd done with her flat and with her maids uniforms, found the cracks in the system."	"My mom, same as she'd done with her flat and with her maids uniforms, found the cracks in the system."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"165"	" It was illegal to be mixed, to have a black parent and a white parent. But it was not illegal to be colored, to have two parents who were both colored."	"It was illegal to be mixed, to have a black parent and a white parent. But it was not illegal to be colored, to have two parents who were both colored."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"167"	" There was a colored woman named Queen who lived in our block of flats. When we wanted to go out to the park, my mom would invite her to go with us. Queen would walk next to me and act like she was my mother, and my mother would walk a few steps behind, like she was the maid working for the colored woman."	"There was a colored woman named Queen who lived in our block of flats. When we wanted to go out to the park, my mom would invite her to go with us. Queen would walk next to me and act like she was my mother, and my mother would walk a few steps behind, like she was the maid working for the colored woman."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"168"	" I've got dozens of pictures of me walking with this woman who looks like me, but who isn't my mother. And the black woman standing behind us who looks like she's photobombing the picture? That's my mom. When we didn't have a colored woman to walk with us, my mom would risk walking with me on her own. She would hold my hand or carry me, but if the police showed up she would have to drop me and pretend I wasn't hers. Like I was a bag of weed."	"I've got dozens of pictures of me walking with this woman who looks like me, but who isn't my mother. And the black woman standing behind us who looks like she's photobombing the picture? That's my mom. When we didn't have a colored woman to walk with us, my mom would risk walking with me on her own. She would hold my hand or carry me, but if the police showed up she would have to drop me and pretend I wasn't hers. Like I was a bag of weed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"169"	" When I was born, my mother hadn't seen her family in three years, but she wanted me to know them and wanted them to know me, so the prodigal daughter returned. We lived in town, but I would spend weeks at a time with my grandmother in Soweto, often during the holidays."	"When I was born, my mother hadn't seen her family in three years, but she wanted me to know them and wanted them to know me, so the prodigal daughter returned. We lived in town, but I would spend weeks at a time with my grandmother in Soweto, often during the holidays."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"17"	" It terrified me how violent and dangerous he was when he snapped."	"It terrified me how violent and dangerous he was when he snapped."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"171"	" Soweto was designed to be bombed. That's how forward-thinking the architects of apartheid were. The township was a city unto itself, with a population of nearly one million."	"Soweto was designed to be bombed. That's how forward thinking the architects of apartheid were. The township was a city unto itself, with a population of nearly one million."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"172"	" There were only two roads, in and out. That was so that the military could lock us in, quell any rebellion. And if the monkeys ever went crazy and tried to break out of their cage, the air force could fly over and bomb the shit out of everyone. Growing up, I never knew that my grandmother lived in the center of a bullseye."	"There were only two roads, in and out. That was so that the military could lock us in, quell any rebellion. And if the monkeys ever went crazy and tried to break out of their cage, the air force could fly over and bomb the shit out of everyone. Growing up, I never knew that my grandmother lived in the center of a bullseye."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"173"	" In the city, as difficult as it was to get around, we managed."	"In the city, as difficult as it was to get around, we managed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"174"	" enough people were out and about, black, white and colored, going to and from work that we could get lost in the crowd. But only black people were permitted in Soweto. It was much harder to hide someone who looked like me, and the government was watching much more closely."	"enough people were out and about, black, white and colored, going to and from work that we could get lost in the crowd. But only black people were permitted in Soweto. It was much harder to hide someone who looked like me, and the government was watching much more closely."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"176"	" The township was in a constant state of insurrection. Someone was always marching or protesting somewhere and had to be suppressed. Playing in my grandmother's house, I'd hear gunshots, screams, tear gas being fired into crowds."	"The township was in a constant state of insurrection. Someone was always marching or protesting somewhere and had to be suppressed. Playing in my grandmother's house, I'd hear gunshots, screams, tear gas being fired into crowds."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"177"	" My memories of the hippos and the flying squads came from when I was 5 or 6, when apartheid was finally coming apart. I never saw the police before that, because we could never risk the police seeing me."	"My memories of the hippos and the flying squads came from when I was  five  or  six , when apartheid was finally coming apart. I never saw the police before that, because we could never risk the police seeing me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"178"	" Whenever we went to Soweto, my grandmother refused to let me outside. If she was watching me, it was, no, no, no, he doesn't leave the house. Behind the wall, in the yard, I could play, but not in the street. And that's where the rest of the boys and girls were playing, in the street. My cousins, the neighborhood kids, they'd open the gate and head out and roam free and come back at dusk. I'd beg my grandmother to go outside, please, please, can I go play with you?"	"Whenever we went to Soweto, my grandmother refused to let me outside. If she was watching me, it was, no, no, no, he doesn't leave the house. Behind the wall, in the yard, I could play, but not in the street. And that's where the rest of the boys and girls were playing, in the street. My cousins, the neighborhood kids, they'd open the gate and head out and roam free and come back at dusk. I'd beg my grandmother to go outside, please, please, can I go play with you?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"179"	" For the longest time, I thought she meant that the other kids were going to steal me. But she was talking about the police. Children could be taken. Children were taken. The wrong color kid in the wrong color area and the government could come in, strip your parents of custody, haul you off to an orphanage. To police the townships, the government relied on its network of Imbimbies, the anonymous snitches who'd inform on suspicious activity. There were also the Black Jacks, black people who worked for the police."	"For the longest time, I thought she meant that the other kids were going to steal me. But she was talking about the police. Children could be taken. Children were taken. The wrong color kid in the wrong color area and the government could come in, strip your parents of custody, haul you off to an orphanage. To police the townships, the government relied on its network of Imbimbies, the anonymous snitches who'd inform on suspicious activity. There were also the Black Jacks, black people who worked for the police."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"180"	" My gran still tells me the story of when I was three years old and fed up with being a prisoner. I dug a hole under the gate in the driveway, wriggled through and ran off."	"My gran still tells me the story of when I was three years old and fed up with being a prisoner. I dug a hole under the gate in the driveway, wriggled through and ran off."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"181"	" Everyone panicked. A search party went out and tracked me down. I had no idea how much danger I was putting everyone in. The family could have been deported. My gran could have been arrested. My mom might have gone to prison. And I would have probably been packed off to a home for colored kids."	"Everyone panicked. A search party went out and tracked me down. I had no idea how much danger I was putting everyone in. The family could have been deported. My gran could have been arrested. My mom might have gone to prison. And I would have probably been packed off to a home for colored kids."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"182"	" So I was kept inside."	"So I was kept inside."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"183"	" Other than those few instances of walking in the park, the flashes of memory I have from when I was young are almost all indoors. Me, with my mom, in her tiny flats. Me by myself, at my grands. I didn't have any friends. I didn't know any kids, besides my cousins. I wasn't a lonely kid. I was good at being alone. I'd read books, play with the toy that I had, make up imaginary worlds. I lived inside my head. I still live inside my head."	"Other than those few instances of walking in the park, the flashes of memory I have from when I was young are almost all indoors. Me, with my mom, in her tiny flats. Me by myself, at my grands. I didn't have any friends. I didn't know any kids, besides my cousins. I wasn't a lonely kid. I was good at being alone. I'd read books, play with the toy that I had, make up imaginary worlds. I lived inside my head. I still live inside my head."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"185"	" The difference is that in virtually every other case, they left."	"The difference is that in virtually every other case, they left."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"186"	" The white parents smuggled them out through Lisutu or Botswana and they grew up in exile in England or Germany or Switzerland because being a mixed family under apartheid was just that unbearable."	"The white parents smuggled them out through Lisutu or Botswana and they grew up in exile in England or Germany or Switzerland because being a mixed family under apartheid was just that unbearable."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"187"	" Once Mandela was elected, we could finally live freely. Exile started to return. I met my first one when I was around 17. He told me his story and I was like, wait, what? You mean we could have left? That was an option?"	"Once Mandela was elected, we could finally live freely. Exile started to return. I met my first one when I was around  seventeen . He told me his story and I was like, wait, what? You mean we could have left? That was an option?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"188"	" Imagine being thrown out of an airplane."	"Imagine being thrown out of an airplane."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"19"	" My whole family is religious. But where my mother was Team Jesus all the way, my grandmother balanced her Christian faith with the traditional possible belief she'd grown up with, communicating with the spirits of our ancestors. For a long time, I didn't understand why so many black people had abandoned their indigenous faith for Christianity. But the more we went to church and the longer I sat in those pews, the more I learned about how Christianity works. If you're a Native American and you prayed to the wolves, you're a savage."	"My whole family is religious. But where my mother was Team Jesus all the way, my grandmother balanced her Christian faith with the traditional possible belief she'd grown up with, communicating with the spirits of our ancestors. For a long time, I didn't understand why so many black people had abandoned their indigenous faith for Christianity. But the more we went to church and the longer I sat in those pews, the more I learned about how Christianity works. If you're a Native American and you prayed to the wolves, you're a savage."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"190"	" Because I'm not Swiss, she said as stubborn as ever. This is my country. Why should I leave?"	"Because I'm not Swiss, she said as stubborn as ever. This is my country. Why should I leave?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"191"	" South Africa is a mix of the old and the new, the ancient and the modern. And South African Christianity is a perfect example of this. We adopted the religion of our colonizers, but most people held on to the old ancestral ways too, just in case."	"South Africa is a mix of the old and the new, the ancient and the modern. And South African Christianity is a perfect example of this. We adopted the religion of our colonizers, but most people held on to the old ancestral ways too, just in case."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"192"	" In South Africa, faith in the Holy Trinity exists quite comfortably alongside belief in witchcraft, in casting spells and putting curses on one's enemies."	"In South Africa, faith in the Holy Trinity exists quite comfortably alongside belief in witchcraft, in casting spells and putting curses on one's enemies."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"194"	" Mr. Noah, you've been accused of murder. You used witchcraft to kill David Kibuka by causing him to be struck by lightning. What is the evidence? The evidence is that David Kibuka got struck by lightning and it wasn't even raining."	"Mr. Noah, you've been accused of murder. You used witchcraft to kill David Kibuka by causing him to be struck by lightning. What is the evidence? The evidence is that David Kibuka got struck by lightning and it wasn't even raining."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"195"	" and you go to trial. The court is presided over by a judge. There is a docket. There is a prosecutor. Your defense attorney has to prove lack of motive, go through the crime scene forensics, present a staunch defense, and your attorney's argument can't be, witchcraft isn't real. No, no, no. You'll lose."	"and you go to trial. The court is presided over by a judge. There is a docket. There is a prosecutor. Your defense attorney has to prove lack of motive, go through the crime scene forensics, present a staunch defense, and your attorney's argument can't be, witchcraft isn't real. No, no, no. You'll lose."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"196"	" 3. Trevor, pray."	" three . Trevor, pray."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"197"	" I grew up in a world run by women."	"I grew up in a world run by women."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"199"	" The only semi-regular male figure in my life was my grandfather, my mother's father, who was a force to be reckoned with. He was divorced from my grandmother and didn't live with us, but he was around. His name was Temperance Noah, which was odd since he was not a man of moderation at all. He was boisterous and loud."	"The only semi regular male figure in my life was my grandfather, my mother's father, who was a force to be reckoned with. He was divorced from my grandmother and didn't live with us, but he was around. His name was Temperance Noah, which was odd since he was not a man of moderation at all. He was boisterous and loud."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"2"	" to prohibit illicit carnal intercourse between Europeans and natives and other acts in relation thereto."	"to prohibit illicit carnal intercourse between Europeans and natives and other acts in relation thereto."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"20"	" But when white people pray to a guy who turns water into wine, well, that's just common sense."	"But when white people pray to a guy who turns water into wine, well, that's just common sense."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"200"	" His nickname in the neighborhood was Dachiesa, which translates loosely to the smoking hot grandpa. And that's exactly who he was. He loved the ladies and the ladies loved him. He'd put on his best suit and stroll through the streets of Soweto on random afternoons, making everybody laugh and charming all the women he'd meet. He had a big, dazzling smile with bright white teeth. False teeth. At home, he'd take them out"	"His nickname in the neighborhood was Dachiesa, which translates loosely to the smoking hot grandpa. And that's exactly who he was. He loved the ladies and the ladies loved him. He'd put on his best suit and stroll through the streets of Soweto on random afternoons, making everybody laugh and charming all the women he'd meet. He had a big, dazzling smile with bright white teeth. False teeth. At home, he'd take them out."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"202"	" One time, he borrowed my mother's car to go to the shop for milk and bread. He disappeared and didn't come home until late that night when we were way past the point of needing the milk or the bread. Turned out, he'd passed a young woman at the bus stop and, believing no beautiful woman should have to wait for a bus, he offered her a ride to where she lived, three hours away. My mom was furious with him because he'd cost us a whole tank of petrol, which was enough to get us to work and school for two weeks."	"One time, he borrowed my mother's car to go to the shop for milk and bread. He disappeared and didn't come home until late that night when we were way past the point of needing the milk or the bread. Turned out, he'd passed a young woman at the bus stop and, believing no beautiful woman should have to wait for a bus, he offered her a ride to where she lived, three hours away. My mom was furious with him because he'd cost us a whole tank of petrol, which was enough to get us to work and school for two weeks."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"203.01"	" When he was up, you couldn't stop him."	"When he was up, you couldn't stop him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"203.02"	" but his mood swings were wild."	"but his mood swings were wild."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"203.03"	" In his youth he'd been a boxer, and one day he said I'd disrespected him and now he wanted to box me."	"In his youth he'd been a boxer, and one day he said I'd disrespected him and now he wanted to box me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"203.05"	" That was 12."	"That was  twelve ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"203.06"	" He had his fists up circling me. Let's go, Trevor. Come on. Put your fists up. Hit me. I'll show you I'm still a man. Let's go."	"He had his fists up circling me. Let's go, Trevor. Come on. Put your fists up. Hit me. I'll show you I'm still a man. Let's go."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"203.07"	" I couldn't hit him because I wasn't about to hit my elder."	"I couldn't hit him because I wasn't about to hit my elder."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"203.08"	" Plus, I'd never been in a fight, and I wasn't gonna have my first one be with an 80-year-old man."	"Plus, I'd never been in a fight, and I wasn't gonna have my first one be with an  eighty  year old man."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"204"	" I ran to my mom and she got him to stop."	"I ran to my mom and she got him to stop."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"205"	" The day after his pugilistic rage, he sat in his chair and didn't move or say a word all day."	"The day after his pugilistic rage, he sat in his chair and didn't move or say a word all day."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"206"	" Temperance lived with his second family in the Middlelands, and we visited them sparingly because my mom was always afraid of being poisoned. Which was a thing that would happen? The first family were the heirs, so there was always a chance they might get poisoned by the second family. It was like Game of Thrones with poor people. We'd go into that house and my mom would warn me. Trevor, don't eat the food. But I'm starving! No, they might poison us."	"Temperance lived with his second family in the Middlelands, and we visited them sparingly because my mom was always afraid of being poisoned. Which was a thing that would happen? The first family were the heirs, so there was always a chance they might get poisoned by the second family. It was like Game of Thrones with poor people. We'd go into that house and my mom would warn me. Trevor, don't eat the food. But I'm starving! No, they might poison us."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"207"	" Okay then, why don't I just pray to Jesus and Jesus will take the poison out of the food. Trevor, sun criella."	"Okay then, why don't I just pray to Jesus and Jesus will take the poison out of the food. Trevor, sun criella."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"209"	" In addition to my mom, there was my aunt, Smongile. She and her first husband Dinky had two kids, my cousins, Mlunisi and Bullelo. Smongile was a powerhouse, a strong woman in every sense, big chested, the mother hen."	"In addition to my mom, there was my aunt, Smongile. She and her first husband Dinky had two kids, my cousins, Mlunisi and Bullelo. Smongile was a powerhouse, a strong woman in every sense, big chested, the mother hen."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"21"	" My childhood involved church, or some form of church, at least four nights a week. Tuesday night was the prayer meeting. Wednesday night was Bible study. Thursday night was youth church. Friday and Saturday we had off, time to sin. Then on Sunday we went to church. Three churches, to be precise. The reason we went to three churches was because my mom said each church gave her something different."	"My childhood involved church, or some form of church, at least four nights a week. Tuesday night was the prayer meeting. Wednesday night was Bible study. Thursday night was youth church. Friday and Saturday we had off, time to sin. Then on Sunday we went to church. Three churches, to be precise. The reason we went to three churches was because my mom said each church gave her something different."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"210"	" Dinky, as his name implies, was dinky. He was a small man. He was abusive, but not really. It was more like he tried to be abusive, but he wasn't very good at it. He was trying to live up to this image of what he thought a husband should be. Dominant. Controlling."	"Dinky, as his name implies, was dinky. He was a small man. He was abusive, but not really. It was more like he tried to be abusive, but he wasn't very good at it. He was trying to live up to this image of what he thought a husband should be. Dominant. Controlling."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"211"	" I remember being told as a child, if you don't hit your woman, you don't love her."	"I remember being told as a child, if you don't hit your woman, you don't love her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"21240.023"	" And round and round we went."	"And round and round we went."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"213"	" Dinky was trying to masquerade as this patriarch that he wasn't. He'd slap my aunt and hit her and she'd take it and take it and then eventually she'd snap and smack him down and put him back in his place. Dinky would always walk around like, I controlled my woman. And you'd want to say, Dinky, first of all, you don't. Second of all, you don't need to because she loves you."	"Dinky was trying to masquerade as this patriarch that he wasn't. He'd slap my aunt and hit her and she'd take it and take it and then eventually she'd snap and smack him down and put him back in his place. Dinky would always walk around like, I controlled my woman. And you'd want to say, Dinky, first of all, you don't. Second of all, you don't need to because she loves you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"214"	" I can remember one day, my aunt had really had enough."	"I can remember one day, my aunt had really had enough."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"215"	" I was in the yard and Dinky came running out of the house screaming bloody murder. Smongi-le was right behind him with a pot of boiling water, cursing at him and threatening to douse him with it. In Soweto, you were always hearing about men getting doused with pots of boiling water. Often a woman's only recourse. And men were lucky if it was water. Some women used hot cooking oil. Water was if the woman wanted to teach her man a lesson. Oil meant she wanted to end it."	"I was in the yard and Dinky came running out of the house screaming bloody murder. Smongi le was right behind him with a pot of boiling water, cursing at him and threatening to douse him with it. In Soweto, you were always hearing about men getting doused with pots of boiling water. Often a woman's only recourse. And men were lucky if it was water. Some women used hot cooking oil. Water was if the woman wanted to teach her man a lesson. Oil meant she wanted to end it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"217"	" My great-grandmother lived with us as well. We called her Koko. She was super old, well into her 90s, stooped and frail, completely blind. Her eyes had gone white, clouded over by cataracts. She couldn't walk without someone holding her up."	"My great grandmother lived with us as well. We called her Koko. She was super old, well into her  ninety s, stooped and frail, completely blind. Her eyes had gone white, clouded over by cataracts. She couldn't walk without someone holding her up."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"218"	" She'd sit in the kitchen next to the coal stove, bundled up in long skirts and headscarves, blankets over her shoulders. The coal stove was always on. It was for cooking, heating the house, heating water for baths. We'd put her there because it was the warmest spot in the house. In the morning, someone would wake her and bring her to sit in the kitchen. At night, someone would come take her to bed. That's all she did. All day, every day. Sit by the stove."	"She'd sit in the kitchen next to the coal stove, bundled up in long skirts and headscarves, blankets over her shoulders. The coal stove was always on. It was for cooking, heating the house, heating water for baths. We'd put her there because it was the warmest spot in the house. In the morning, someone would wake her and bring her to sit in the kitchen. At night, someone would come take her to bed. That's all she did. All day, every day. Sit by the stove."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"219"	" She was fantastic and fully with it. She just couldn't see and didn't move."	"She was fantastic and fully with it. She just couldn't see and didn't move."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"22"	" The first church offered jubilant praise of the Lord. The second church offered deep analysis of the scripture which my mom loved. The third church offered passion and catharsis. It was a place where you truly felt the presence of the Holy Spirits inside you."	"The first church offered jubilant praise of the Lord. The second church offered deep analysis of the scripture which my mom loved. The third church offered passion and catharsis. It was a place where you truly felt the presence of the Holy Spirits inside you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"221"	" The fact that I grew up in a world run by women was no accident. Apartheid kept me away from my father because he was white. But almost all the kids I knew on my grandmother's block in Soweto, Apartheid had taken away their fathers as well, just for different reasons. Their fathers were off working in a mine somewhere, able to come home only during the holidays. Their fathers had been sent to prison. Their fathers were in exile, fighting for the cause. Women held the community together."	"The fact that I grew up in a world run by women was no accident. Apartheid kept me away from my father because he was white. But almost all the kids I knew on my grandmother's block in Soweto, Apartheid had taken away their fathers as well, just for different reasons. Their fathers were off working in a mine somewhere, able to come home only during the holidays. Their fathers had been sent to prison. Their fathers were in exile, fighting for the cause. Women held the community together."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"222"	" Watin taba fazze, wa tintin boho to was the chance they would rally to during the freedom struggle. When you strike a woman, you strike a rock. As a nation, we recognize the power of women, but in the home, they were expected to submit and obey."	"Watin taba fazze, wa tintin boho to was the chance they would rally to during the freedom struggle. When you strike a woman, you strike a rock. As a nation, we recognize the power of women, but in the home, they were expected to submit and obey."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"223"	" In Soweto, religion filled the void left by absent men. I used to ask my mom if it was hard for her to raise me alone without a husband. She'd reply, just because I live without a man doesn't mean I've never had a husband. God is my husband."	"In Soweto, religion filled the void left by absent men. I used to ask my mom if it was hard for her to raise me alone without a husband. She'd reply, just because I live without a man doesn't mean I've never had a husband. God is my husband."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"224"	" For my mom, my aunt, my grandmother, and all the other women on our streets, life centered on faith. Prayer meetings would rotate houses up and down the block based on the day. These groups were women and children only."	"For my mom, my aunt, my grandmother, and all the other women on our streets, life centered on faith. Prayer meetings would rotate houses up and down the block based on the day. These groups were women and children only."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"226"	" For these prayer meetings, we'd jam ourselves into the tiny living area of the host family's house and form a circle. Then we would go around the circle offering prayers. The grannies would talk about what was happening in their lives. I'm happy to be here. I had a good week at work. I got a raise and I wanted to say thank you and praise Jesus. Sometimes they'd pull out their Bible and say, this scripture spoke to me and maybe it will help you. Then there would be a bit of"	"For these prayer meetings, we'd jam ourselves into the tiny living area of the host family's house and form a circle. Then we would go around the circle offering prayers. The grannies would talk about what was happening in their lives. I'm happy to be here. I had a good week at work. I got a raise and I wanted to say thank you and praise Jesus. Sometimes they'd pull out their Bible and say, this scripture spoke to me and maybe it will help you. Then there would be a bit of."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"227"	" There was a leather pad called the beat that you'd strap to your palm like a percussion instrument. Someone would clap along on that, keeping time while everyone sang. That's how it would go."	"There was a leather pad called the beat that you'd strap to your palm like a percussion instrument. Someone would clap along on that, keeping time while everyone sang. That's how it would go."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"228"	" Tuesday night, the prayer meeting came to my grandmother's house, and I was always excited for two reasons. One, I got to clap along on the beat for the singing, and two, I loved to pray. My grandmother always told me that she loved my prayers. She believed my prayers were more powerful because I prayed in English. Everyone knows that Jesus, who's white, speaks English. The Bible is in English. Yes, the Bible was not written in English, but the Bible came to South Africa in England."	"Tuesday night, the prayer meeting came to my grandmother's house, and I was always excited for two reasons. One, I got to clap along on the beat for the singing, and two, I loved to pray. My grandmother always told me that she loved my prayers. She believed my prayers were more powerful because I prayed in English. Everyone knows that Jesus, who's white, speaks English. The Bible is in English. Yes, the Bible was not written in English, but the Bible came to South Africa in England."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"229"	" Women in the township always had something to pray for. Money problems, a son who'd been arrested, a daughter who was sick, a husband who drank. Whenever the prayer meetings were at our house, because my prayers were so good, my grandmother would want me to pray for everyone. She would turn to me and say, Trevor, pray. And I'd pray. I loved doing it. My grandmother had convinced me that my prayers got answered. I felt like I was helping people."	"Women in the township always had something to pray for. Money problems, a son who'd been arrested, a daughter who was sick, a husband who drank. Whenever the prayer meetings were at our house, because my prayers were so good, my grandmother would want me to pray for everyone. She would turn to me and say, Trevor, pray. And I'd pray. I loved doing it. My grandmother had convinced me that my prayers got answered. I felt like I was helping people."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"230"	" There is something magical about Soweto."	"There is something magical about Soweto."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"231"	" Yes, it was a prison designed by our oppressors, but it also gave us a sense of self-determination and control. Soweto was ours. It had an aspirational quality that you don't find elsewhere. In America, the dream is to make it out of the ghetto. In Soweto, because there was no leaving the ghetto, the dream was to transform the ghetto."	"Yes, it was a prison designed by our oppressors, but it also gave us a sense of self determination and control. Soweto was ours. It had an aspirational quality that you don't find elsewhere. In America, the dream is to make it out of the ghetto. In Soweto, because there was no leaving the ghetto, the dream was to transform the ghetto."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"232"	" For the million people who lived in Soweto, there were no stores, no bars, no restaurants. There were no paved roads, minimal electricity, inadequate sewerage. But when you put one million people together in one place, they find a way to make a life for themselves. A black market economy rose up, with every type of business being run out of someone's house. Auto mechanics, daycare, guys selling refurbished tires,"	"For the million people who lived in Soweto, there were no stores, no bars, no restaurants. There were no paved roads, minimal electricity, inadequate sewerage. But when you put one million people together in one place, they find a way to make a life for themselves. A black market economy rose up, with every type of business being run out of someone's house. Auto mechanics, daycare, guys selling refurbished tires,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"233"	" The most common were the spazza shops and the shabines. The spazza shops were informal grocery stores. People would build a kiosk in their garage, buy wholesale bread and eggs, and then resell them piecemeal. Everyone in the township bought things in minute quantities because nobody had any money. You couldn't afford to buy a dozen eggs at a time, but you could buy two eggs because that's all you needed that morning. You could buy a quarter loaf of bread, a cup of"	"The most common were the spazza shops and the shabines. The spazza shops were informal grocery stores. People would build a kiosk in their garage, buy wholesale bread and eggs, and then resell them piecemeal. Everyone in the township bought things in minute quantities because nobody had any money. You couldn't afford to buy a dozen eggs at a time, but you could buy two eggs because that's all you needed that morning. You could buy a quarter loaf of bread, a cup of."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"235"	" People built homes the way they bought eggs. A little at a time."	"People built homes the way they bought eggs. A little at a time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"236"	" Every family in the township was allocated a piece of land by the government."	"Every family in the township was allocated a piece of land by the government."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.01"	" you'd first build a shanty on your plots."	"you'd first build a shanty on your plots."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.02"	" a makeshift structure of plywood and corrugated iron."	"a makeshift structure of plywood and corrugated iron."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.04"	" One wall."	"One wall."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.05"	" Then you'd save up and build another wall."	"Then you'd save up and build another wall."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.06"	" Then years later, a third wall and eventually a fourth."	"Then years later, a third wall and eventually a fourth."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.07"	" Now you had a room."	"Now you had a room."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.09"	" then you'd save up for a roof."	"then you'd save up for a roof."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.10"	" than Windows."	"than Windows."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.11"	" then you'd plaster the thing."	"then you'd plaster the thing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.12"	" then your daughter would start a family."	"then your daughter would start a family."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.14"	" You'd add another corrugated iron structure onto your brick room and slowly over yours turn that into a proper room for them as well."	"You'd add another corrugated iron structure onto your brick room and slowly over yours turn that into a proper room for them as well."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237.15"	" Now your house had two rooms, then three, maybe four. Slowly over generations, you'd keep trying to get to the point where you had a home."	"Now your house had two rooms, then three, maybe four. Slowly over generations, you'd keep trying to get to the point where you had a home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"237"	" You'd first build a shanty on your plot. A makeshift structure of plywood and corrugated iron. Over time, you'd save up money and build a brick wall. One wall. Then you'd save up and build another wall. Then years later, a third wall and eventually a fourth. Now you had a room. One room for everyone in your family to sleep, eat, do everything. Then you'd save up for a roof. Then windows. Then you'd plaster the thing. Then your daughter would start a family. There was no way for them to go."	"You'd first build a shanty on your plot. A makeshift structure of plywood and corrugated iron. Over time, you'd save up money and build a brick wall. One wall. Then you'd save up and build another wall. Then years later, a third wall and eventually a fourth. Now you had a room. One room for everyone in your family to sleep, eat, do everything. Then you'd save up for a roof. Then windows. Then you'd plaster the thing. Then your daughter would start a family. There was no way for them to go."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"238"	" My grandmother lived in Orlando East. She had a two-room house. Not a two-bedroom house. A two-room house. There was a bedroom and then there was basically a living room slash kitchen slash everything else room. Some people might say we lived like poor people. I prefer open plan."	"My grandmother lived in Orlando East. She had a two room house. Not a two bedroom house. A two room house. There was a bedroom and then there was basically a living room slash kitchen slash everything else room. Some people might say we lived like poor people. I prefer open plan."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"24"	" mixed church was Ramer Bible Church. Ramer was one of those huge super modern suburban mega churches. The pastor, Ray McCauley, was an ex bodybuilder with a big smile and the personality of a cheerleader. Pastor Ray had competed in the 1974 Mr. Universe competition. He placed third. The winner that year was Arnold Schwarzenegger."	"mixed church was Ramer Bible Church. Ramer was one of those huge super modern suburban mega churches. The pastor, Ray McCauley, was an ex bodybuilder with a big smile and the personality of a cheerleader. Pastor Ray had competed in the  one thousand, nine hundred and seventy four  Mr. Universe competition. He placed third. The winner that year was Arnold Schwarzenegger."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"240"	" We had two shanties in the backyard that my grandmother would rent out to migrants and seasonal workers. We had a small peach tree in a tiny patch on one side of the house and on the other side, my grandmother had a driveway. I never understood why my grandmother had a driveway. She didn't have a car. She didn't know how to drive. Yet she had a driveway. All of our neighbors had driveways. Some with fancy, cast iron gates. None of them had cars either."	"We had two shanties in the backyard that my grandmother would rent out to migrants and seasonal workers. We had a small peach tree in a tiny patch on one side of the house and on the other side, my grandmother had a driveway. I never understood why my grandmother had a driveway. She didn't have a car. She didn't know how to drive. Yet she had a driveway. All of our neighbors had driveways. Some with fancy, cast iron gates. None of them had cars either."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"241"	" The story of Soweto is the story of driveways. It's a hopeful place."	"The story of Soweto is the story of driveways. It's a hopeful place."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"242"	" Sadly, no matter how fancy you made your house, there was one thing you could never aspire to improve. Your toilet. There was no indoor running water, just one communal outdoor tap and one outdoor toilet shared by six or seven houses. Our toilet was an acorrugated iron outhouse shared among the adjoining houses. Inside there was a concrete slab with a hole in it and a plastic toilet seat on top. There had been a lid at some point, but it had broken and disappeared."	"Sadly, no matter how fancy you made your house, there was one thing you could never aspire to improve. Your toilet. There was no indoor running water, just one communal outdoor tap and one outdoor toilet shared by six or seven houses. Our toilet was an acorrugated iron outhouse shared among the adjoining houses. Inside there was a concrete slab with a hole in it and a plastic toilet seat on top. There had been a lid at some point, but it had broken and disappeared."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"244"	" One afternoon, when I was around five years old, my gran left me at home for a few hours to go run errands. I was lying on the floor in the bedroom reading. I needed to go, but it was pouring down rain. I was dreading going outside to use the toilets, getting drenched, running out there, water dripping on me from the leaky ceiling, wet newspaper, the flies attacking me from below. Then I had an idea. Why bother with the outhouse at all? Why not put some newspaper on the floor"	"One afternoon, when I was around five years old, my gran left me at home for a few hours to go run errands. I was lying on the floor in the bedroom reading. I needed to go, but it was pouring down rain. I was dreading going outside to use the toilets, getting drenched, running out there, water dripping on me from the leaky ceiling, wet newspaper, the flies attacking me from below. Then I had an idea. Why bother with the outhouse at all? Why not put some newspaper on the floor."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"245"	" When you shit as you first sit down, you're not fully in the experience yet. You are not yet a shitting person. You are transitioning from a person about to shit to a person who is shitting. You don't whip out your smartphone or a newspaper right away. It takes a minute to get the first shit out of the way and get in the zone and get comfortable. Once you reach that moment, that's when it gets really nice. It's a powerful experience, shitting. There's something magical about it."	"When you shit as you first sit down, you're not fully in the experience yet. You are not yet a shitting person. You are transitioning from a person about to shit to a person who is shitting. You don't whip out your smartphone or a newspaper right away. It takes a minute to get the first shit out of the way and get in the zone and get comfortable. Once you reach that moment, that's when it gets really nice. It's a powerful experience, shitting. There's something magical about it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"246"	" You can pee without giving it a second thought, but not so with shitting. Have you ever looked in a baby's eyes when it's shitting? It's having a moment of pure self-awareness. The outhouse ruins that for you. The rain, the flies, you're robbed of your moment, and nobody should be robbed of that. Squatting and shitting on the kitchen floor that day, I was like, wow."	"You can pee without giving it a second thought, but not so with shitting. Have you ever looked in a baby's eyes when it's shitting? It's having a moment of pure self awareness. The outhouse ruins that for you. The rain, the flies, you're robbed of your moment, and nobody should be robbed of that. Squatting and shitting on the kitchen floor that day, I was like, wow."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"247"	" There are no flies. There's no stress. This is really great. I'm really enjoying this."	"There are no flies. There's no stress. This is really great. I'm really enjoying this."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"249"	" Then, I casually looked around the room and I glanced to my left. And there, just a few feet away, right next to the coal stove, was Koko."	"Then, I casually looked around the room and I glanced to my left. And there, just a few feet away, right next to the coal stove, was Koko."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"25"	" Every week, Rey would be up on stage working really hard to make Jesus cool. There was arena-style seating and a rock band jamming out with the latest Christian contemporary pop. Everyone sang along and if you didn't know the words, that was okay because they were all right up there on the jumbotron for you. It was Christian karaoke basically. I always had a blast at mixed church."	"Every week, Rey would be up on stage working really hard to make Jesus cool. There was arena style seating and a rock band jamming out with the latest Christian contemporary pop. Everyone sang along and if you didn't know the words, that was okay because they were all right up there on the jumbotron for you. It was Christian karaoke basically. I always had a blast at mixed church."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"250"	" It was like the scene in Jurassic Park, when the children turn and the T-Rex is right there. Her eyes were wide open, cloudy white and darting around the room. I knew she couldn't see me, but her nose was starting to crinkle. She could sense that something was wrong. I panicked. I was mid-shit. All you can do when you're mid-shit is finish shitting. My only option was to finish as quietly and as slowly as I could, so that's what I decided to do. Then, the softest"	"It was like the scene in Jurassic Park, when the children turn and the T Rex is right there. Her eyes were wide open, cloudy white and darting around the room. I knew she couldn't see me, but her nose was starting to crinkle. She could sense that something was wrong. I panicked. I was mid shit. All you can do when you're mid shit is finish shitting. My only option was to finish as quietly and as slowly as I could, so that's what I decided to do. Then, the softest."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"251"	" I froze."	"I froze."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"253"	" Who's there? Hello!"	"Who's there? Hello!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"254"	" I kept quiet."	"I kept quiet."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"255"	" Waited."	"Waited."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"256"	" Then started again. Is somebody there? Trevor? Is that you? Frances? Hello? Hello? She started calling out the whole family. It was like a game. Like I was trying to hide and a blind woman was trying to find me using sonar. Every time she called out, I froze."	"Then started again. Is somebody there? Trevor? Is that you? Frances? Hello? Hello? She started calling out the whole family. It was like a game. Like I was trying to hide and a blind woman was trying to find me using sonar. Every time she called out, I froze."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"258"	" Then I folded it over some more, walked over to the rubbish bin, placed my sin at the bottom and gingerly covered it with the rest of the trash."	"Then I folded it over some more, walked over to the rubbish bin, placed my sin at the bottom and gingerly covered it with the rest of the trash."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"259"	" Then I tiptoed back to the other room, curled up on the mattress on the floor, and pretended to be asleep."	"Then I tiptoed back to the other room, curled up on the mattress on the floor, and pretended to be asleep."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"26"	" White Church was Rosebank Union in Santon, a very white and wealthy part of Johannesburg. I loved White Church because I didn't actually have to go to the main service. My mom would go to that and I would go to the youth side to Sunday school. In Sunday school we got to read cool stories. Noah and the Flood was obviously a favorite. I had a personal stake there. But I also loved the stories about Moses parting the Red Sea, David slaying Goliath, Jesus whipping the money changes in the temple."	"White Church was Rosebank Union in Santon, a very white and wealthy part of Johannesburg. I loved White Church because I didn't actually have to go to the main service. My mom would go to that and I would go to the youth side to Sunday school. In Sunday school we got to read cool stories. Noah and the Flood was obviously a favorite. I had a personal stake there. But I also loved the stories about Moses parting the Red Sea, David slaying Goliath, Jesus whipping the money changes in the temple."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"260"	" The shit was done, no outhouse involved, and Koko was none the wiser."	"The shit was done, no outhouse involved, and Koko was none the wiser."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"262"	" An hour later, the rain had stopped. My grandmother came home. The second she walked in, Coco called out to her. Francis, thank God you are here. There's something in the house."	"An hour later, the rain had stopped. My grandmother came home. The second she walked in, Coco called out to her. Francis, thank God you are here. There's something in the house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"263"	" What is it? I don't know, but I could hear it, and there was a smell."	"What is it? I don't know, but I could hear it, and there was a smell."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"264"	" My grand started sniffing the air. Dear lord, yes, I can smell it too. Is it a rat? Did something die? It's definitely in the house."	"My grand started sniffing the air. Dear lord, yes, I can smell it too. Is it a rat? Did something die? It's definitely in the house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"265"	" They went back and forth about it, quite concerned. And then, as it was getting dark, my mother came home from work. The second she walked in, my grand called out to her, ooh, non buicello, non buicello, there's something in the house. What? What do you mean?"	"They went back and forth about it, quite concerned. And then, as it was getting dark, my mother came home from work. The second she walked in, my grand called out to her, ooh, non buicello, non buicello, there's something in the house. What? What do you mean?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"267"	" Then my mom, who has a keen sense of smell, started going around the kitchen sniffing."	"Then my mom, who has a keen sense of smell, started going around the kitchen sniffing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"268"	" Yes, I can smell it. I can find it. I can find it. She went to the rubbish bin. It's in here. She lifted out the rubbish, pulled out the folded newspaper underneath and opened it up. And there was my little turd."	"Yes, I can smell it. I can find it. I can find it. She went to the rubbish bin. It's in here. She lifted out the rubbish, pulled out the folded newspaper underneath and opened it up. And there was my little turd."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"269"	" She showed it to my gran. Look!"	"She showed it to my gran. Look!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"27"	" I grew up in a home with very little exposure to popular culture. Boys to men were not allowed in my mother's house. Songs about some guy grinding on a girl all night long? No, no, no. That was forbidden."	"I grew up in a home with very little exposure to popular culture. Boys to men were not allowed in my mother's house. Songs about some guy grinding on a girl all night long? No, no, no. That was forbidden."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271.01"	" Koko, still blind, still stuck in her chair, was dying to know what was happening."	"Koko, still blind, still stuck in her chair, was dying to know what was happening."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271.02"	" What's going on? She cried."	"What's going on? She cried."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271.03"	" What's going on? Did you find it?"	"What's going on? Did you find it?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271.04"	" It's shit, Mum said."	"It's shit, Mum said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271.06"	" But how? Koko said."	"But how? Koko said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271.07"	" There was no one here."	"There was no one here."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271.08"	" Are you sure there was no one here?"	"Are you sure there was no one here?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271.09"	" Yes, I called out to everyone. Nobody came."	"Yes, I called out to everyone. Nobody came."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"271"	" Koko, still blind, still stuck in her chair, was dying to know what was happening. What's going on? She cried. What's going on? Did you find it? It's shit, mom said. There's shit in the bottom of the dustbin. But how? Koko said. There was no one here. Are you sure there was no one here? Yes, I called out to everyone. Nobody came. My mother gasped. We've been bewitched. It's a demon."	"Koko, still blind, still stuck in her chair, was dying to know what was happening. What's going on? She cried. What's going on? Did you find it? It's shit, mom said. There's shit in the bottom of the dustbin. But how? Koko said. There was no one here. Are you sure there was no one here? Yes, I called out to everyone. Nobody came. My mother gasped. We've been bewitched. It's a demon."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"272"	" For my mother, this was the logical conclusion. Because that's how witchcraft works. If someone has put a curse on you or your home, there is always a talisman or totem, a tuft of hair or the head of a cat. The physical manifestation of the spiritual thing, proof of the demon's presence."	"For my mother, this was the logical conclusion. Because that's how witchcraft works. If someone has put a curse on you or your home, there is always a talisman or totem, a tuft of hair or the head of a cat. The physical manifestation of the spiritual thing, proof of the demon's presence."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.01"	" Once my mom found the turd, all hell broke loose. This was serious."	"Once my mom found the turd, all hell broke loose. This was serious."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.02"	" They had evidence. She came into the bedroom. Trevor, Trevor, wake up. What? I said playing dumb. What's going on? Come, come, come. There's a demon in the house."	"They had evidence. She came into the bedroom. Trevor, Trevor, wake up. What? I said playing dumb. What's going on? Come, come, come. There's a demon in the house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.04"	" The first thing we had to do was go outside and burn the shit. That's what you do with witchcraft. The only way to destroy it is to burn the physical thing."	"The first thing we had to do was go outside and burn the shit. That's what you do with witchcraft. The only way to destroy it is to burn the physical thing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.05"	" We went out to the yard and my mom put the newspaper with my little turd on the driveway, lit a match and set it on fire."	"We went out to the yard and my mom put the newspaper with my little turd on the driveway, lit a match and set it on fire."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.06"	" Then, my mom and my gran stood around the burning shit, praying and singing songs of praise."	"Then, my mom and my gran stood around the burning shit, praying and singing songs of praise."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.07"	" The commotion didn't stop there, because when there's a demon around, the whole community has to join together to drive it out. If you're not part of the prayer, the demon might leave our house and go to your house and curse you. So we needed everyone."	"The commotion didn't stop there, because when there's a demon around, the whole community has to join together to drive it out. If you're not part of the prayer, the demon might leave our house and go to your house and curse you. So we needed everyone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.09"	" The call went out."	"The call went out."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.10"	" My tiny old gran was out the gate going up and down the block, calling to all the other old grannies for an emergency prayer meeting. Come, we've been bewitched!"	"My tiny old gran was out the gate going up and down the block, calling to all the other old grannies for an emergency prayer meeting. Come, we've been bewitched!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273.11"	" I stood there, my shit burning in the driveway, my poor aged grandmother tottering up and down the streets in a panic and I didn't know what to do. I knew there was no demon, but there was nowhere I could come clean. The hiding I would have to endure. Good lord. Honesty was never the best policy when it came to a hiding. I kept quiet."	"I stood there, my shit burning in the driveway, my poor aged grandmother tottering up and down the streets in a panic and I didn't know what to do. I knew there was no demon, but there was nowhere I could come clean. The hiding I would have to endure. Good lord. Honesty was never the best policy when it came to a hiding. I kept quiet."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"273"	" Once my mom found the turd, all hell broke loose. This was serious. They had evidence. She came into the bedroom. Trevor, Trevor, wake up. What? I said, playing dumb. What's going on? Come, come, come. There's a demon in the house. She took my hand and dragged me out of bed. It was all hands on deck. Time for action. The first thing we had to do was go outside and burn the shit. That's what you do with witchcraft. The only way to destroy it is to burn the physical."	"Once my mom found the turd, all hell broke loose. This was serious. They had evidence. She came into the bedroom. Trevor, Trevor, wake up. What? I said, playing dumb. What's going on? Come, come, come. There's a demon in the house. She took my hand and dragged me out of bed. It was all hands on deck. Time for action. The first thing we had to do was go outside and burn the shit. That's what you do with witchcraft. The only way to destroy it is to burn the physical."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"275"	" I was terrified. I believed in the power of prayer. I knew that my prayers worked. So if I prayed to God to kill the thing that left the shit, and the thing that left the shit was me, then God was going to kill me."	"I was terrified. I believed in the power of prayer. I knew that my prayers worked. So if I prayed to God to kill the thing that left the shit, and the thing that left the shit was me, then God was going to kill me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"276"	" I froze. I didn't know what to do. But all the grannies were looking at me waiting for me to pray, so I prayed, stumbling through as best I could."	"I froze. I didn't know what to do. But all the grannies were looking at me waiting for me to pray, so I prayed, stumbling through as best I could."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"277"	" Dear Lord,"	"Dear Lord,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"278"	" Please protect us, you know, from whoever did this, but like, we don't know what happened exactly. And maybe it was a big misunderstanding and you know, maybe we shouldn't be quick to judge when we don't know the whole story. And I mean, of course, you know best Heavenly Father, but maybe this time it wasn't actually a demon because who can say for certain, so maybe cut whoever"	"Please protect us, you know, from whoever did this, but like, we don't know what happened exactly. And maybe it was a big misunderstanding and you know, maybe we shouldn't be quick to judge when we don't know the whole story. And I mean, of course, you know best Heavenly Father, but maybe this time it wasn't actually a demon because who can say for certain, so maybe cut whoever."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"28"	" Out here the other kids at school singing End of the Road and I'd have no clue what was going on. I knew of these boys to men, but I didn't really know who they were. The only music I knew was from church, soaring, uplifting songs praising Jesus."	"Out here the other kids at school singing End of the Road and I'd have no clue what was going on. I knew of these boys to men, but I didn't really know who they were. The only music I knew was from church, soaring, uplifting songs praising Jesus."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"280"	" That night I felt terrible."	"That night I felt terrible."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"281"	" Before bed, I quietly prayed."	"Before bed, I quietly prayed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"282"	" God, I'm so sorry for all of this. I know this was not cool because I knew God answers your prayers. God is your father. He's the man who's there for you, the man who takes care of you."	"God, I'm so sorry for all of this. I know this was not cool because I knew God answers your prayers. God is your father. He's the man who's there for you, the man who takes care of you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.01"	" When I was growing up, we used to get American TV shows rebroadcast on our stations."	"When I was growing up, we used to get American TV shows rebroadcast on our stations."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.02"	" Doogie Howser MD"	"Doogie Howser MD."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.03"	" Murder, she wrote."	"Murder, she wrote."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.04"	" Rescue 911 with William Shatner."	"Rescue  nine hundred and eleven  with William Shatner."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.06"	" ALF was enough for cons."	"ALF was enough for cons."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.07"	" Transformers was in situ."	"Transformers was in situ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.08"	" But if you wanted to watch them in English, the original American audio would be simulcast on the radio."	"But if you wanted to watch them in English, the original American audio would be simulcast on the radio."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.09"	" You could mute your TV and listen to that."	"You could mute your TV and listen to that."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.11"	" I realized that whenever black people were on screen speaking in African languages, they felt familiar to me."	"I realized that whenever black people were on screen speaking in African languages, they felt familiar to me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.13"	" Then, I'd listen to them in simulcast on the radio, and they would all have black American accents."	"Then, I'd listen to them in simulcast on the radio, and they would all have black American accents."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.14"	" My perception of them changed. They didn't feel familiar. They felt like foreigners."	"My perception of them changed. They didn't feel familiar. They felt like foreigners."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"284.284.012"	" They sounded like they were supposed to sound."	"They sounded like they were supposed to sound."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"285"	" Language brings with it an identity and a culture, or at least the perception of it. A shared language says, we're the same. A language barrier says, we're different. The architects of apartheid understood this. Part of the effort to divide black people was to make sure we were separated, not just physically, but by language as well."	"Language brings with it an identity and a culture, or at least the perception of it. A shared language says, we're the same. A language barrier says, we're different. The architects of apartheid understood this. Part of the effort to divide black people was to make sure we were separated, not just physically, but by language as well."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"286"	" In the Bantu schools, children were only taught in their home language. Zulu kids learned in Zulu. Tswana kids learned in Tswana. Because of this, we'd fall into the trap the government had set for us and fight among ourselves, believing that we were different."	"In the Bantu schools, children were only taught in their home language. Zulu kids learned in Zulu. Tswana kids learned in Tswana. Because of this, we'd fall into the trap the government had set for us and fight among ourselves, believing that we were different."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"287"	" The great thing about language is that you can just as easily use it to do the opposite. Convince people that they are the same. Racism teaches us that we are different because of the color of our skin. But because racism is stupid, it's easily tricked. If you're a racist and you meet someone who doesn't look like you, the fact that he can't speak like you reinforces your racist preconceptions. He's different, less intelligent."	"The great thing about language is that you can just as easily use it to do the opposite. Convince people that they are the same. Racism teaches us that we are different because of the color of our skin. But because racism is stupid, it's easily tricked. If you're a racist and you meet someone who doesn't look like you, the fact that he can't speak like you reinforces your racist preconceptions. He's different, less intelligent."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"288"	" A brilliant scientist can come over the border from Mexico to live in America. But if he speaks in broken English, people say, hey, I don't trust this guy. But he's a scientist. Yeah, in Mexican science, maybe. I don't trust him."	"A brilliant scientist can come over the border from Mexico to live in America. But if he speaks in broken English, people say, hey, I don't trust this guy. But he's a scientist. Yeah, in Mexican science, maybe. I don't trust him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"29"	" It was the same with movies. My mom didn't want my mind polluted by movies with sex and violence, so the Bible was my action movie. Samson was my superhero. He was my He-Man. A guy beating a thousand people to death with a jawbone of a donkey. That's pretty badass. Eventually you get to Paul writing letters to the Ephesians and it loses the plot. But the Old Testament and the Gospels, I could quote you anything from those pages, chapter and verse."	"It was the same with movies. My mom didn't want my mind polluted by movies with sex and violence, so the Bible was my action movie. Samson was my superhero. He was my He Man. A guy beating a thousand people to death with a jawbone of a donkey. That's pretty badass. Eventually you get to Paul writing letters to the Ephesians and it loses the plot. But the Old Testament and the Gospels, I could quote you anything from those pages, chapter and verse."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"290"	" For Chameleon"	"For Chameleon."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"291"	" One afternoon I was playing with my cousins. I was a doctor and they were my patients. I was operating on my cousin Bulello's ear with a set of matches when I accidentally perforated her eardrum. All hell broke loose. My grandmother came running in from the kitchen, guancing and doining, what's happening, what's happening? There was blood coming out of my cousin's head, we were all crying. My grandmother patched up Bulello's ear and made sure to stop the bleeding. But we kept crying. Because clearly we died."	"One afternoon I was playing with my cousins. I was a doctor and they were my patients. I was operating on my cousin Bulello's ear with a set of matches when I accidentally perforated her eardrum. All hell broke loose. My grandmother came running in from the kitchen, guancing and doining, what's happening, what's happening? There was blood coming out of my cousin's head, we were all crying. My grandmother patched up Bulello's ear and made sure to stop the bleeding. But we kept crying. Because clearly we died."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"292"	" Later that night, my mother came home from work. She found my cousin with a bandage over her ear and my gran crying at the kitchen table. What's going on? My mom said. Ho num bui ser lo, she said. Trevor is so naughty. He's the notiest child I've ever come across in my life."	"Later that night, my mother came home from work. She found my cousin with a bandage over her ear and my gran crying at the kitchen table. What's going on? My mom said. Ho num bui ser lo, she said. Trevor is so naughty. He's the notiest child I've ever come across in my life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"294"	" My grandmother treated me like I was white. My grandfather did too. Only, he was even more extreme. He'd called me Maastar."	"My grandmother treated me like I was white. My grandfather did too. Only, he was even more extreme. He'd called me Maastar."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"295"	" In the car, he insisted on driving me as if he were my chauffeur. Master must always sit in the back seat. I never challenged him on it. What was I going to say? I believe your perception of race is flawed, grandfather. No, I was five. I sat in the back."	"In the car, he insisted on driving me as if he were my chauffeur. Master must always sit in the back seat. I never challenged him on it. What was I going to say? I believe your perception of race is flawed, grandfather. No, I was five. I sat in the back."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"296"	" There were so many perks to being white in a black family. I can't even front. I was having a great time. My own family basically did what the American justice system does. I was given more lenient treatment than the black kids. Misbehavior that my cousins would have been punished for. I was given a warning and let off. And I was way naughtier than either of my cousins. It wasn't even close. If something got broken or someone was stealing granny's cookies, it was me. I was trouble."	"There were so many perks to being white in a black family. I can't even front. I was having a great time. My own family basically did what the American justice system does. I was given more lenient treatment than the black kids. Misbehavior that my cousins would have been punished for. I was given a warning and let off. And I was way naughtier than either of my cousins. It wasn't even close. If something got broken or someone was stealing granny's cookies, it was me. I was trouble."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"297"	" My mom was the only force I truly feared. She believed if you spare the rod, you spoil the child. But everyone else said, no, he's different. And they gave me a pass. Growing up the way I did, I learned how easy it is for white people to get comfortable with a system that awards them all the perks. I knew my cousins were getting beaten for things that I'd done, but I wasn't interested in changing my grandmother's perspective, because that would mean I'd get beaten too. Why would I do that? So that I'd feel better?"	"My mom was the only force I truly feared. She believed if you spare the rod, you spoil the child. But everyone else said, no, he's different. And they gave me a pass. Growing up the way I did, I learned how easy it is for white people to get comfortable with a system that awards them all the perks. I knew my cousins were getting beaten for things that I'd done, but I wasn't interested in changing my grandmother's perspective, because that would mean I'd get beaten too. Why would I do that? So that I'd feel better?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"299"	" At that point, I didn't think of the special treatment as having to do with color. I thought of it as having to do with Trevor. It wasn't, Trevor doesn't get beaten because Trevor is white. It was, Trevor doesn't get beaten because Trevor is Trevor."	"At that point, I didn't think of the special treatment as having to do with color. I thought of it as having to do with Trevor. It wasn't, Trevor doesn't get beaten because Trevor is white. It was, Trevor doesn't get beaten because Trevor is Trevor."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"3"	" Be it enacted by the King's most excellent majesty, the Senate and the House of Assembly of the Union of South Africa as follows."	"Be it enacted by the King's most excellent majesty, the Senate and the House of Assembly of the Union of South Africa as follows."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"30"	" Then there was Black Church. There was always some kind of Black Church service going on somewhere. And we tried them all."	"Then there was Black Church. There was always some kind of Black Church service going on somewhere. And we tried them all."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"300"	" Trevor can't go outside. Trevor can't walk without supervision. It's because I'm me. That's why this is happening."	"Trevor can't go outside. Trevor can't walk without supervision. It's because I'm me. That's why this is happening."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"302"	" Nearly one million people lived in Soweto. 99.9% of them were black. And then there was me. I was famous in my neighborhood just because of the color of my skin. I was so unique, people would give directions using me as a landmark. The house on Makalima Street, at the corner you'll see a light-skinned boy. Take a right there."	"Nearly one million people lived in Soweto.  ninety nine . nine  percent  of them were black. And then there was me. I was famous in my neighborhood just because of the color of my skin. I was so unique, people would give directions using me as a landmark. The house on Makalima Street, at the corner you'll see a light skinned boy. Take a right there."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"303"	" Whenever the kids in the street saw me, they'd yell, In dot I am long oo, the white man. Some of them would run away, others would call out to their parents to come look. Others would run up and try to touch me to see if I was real. It was pandemonium."	"Whenever the kids in the street saw me, they'd yell, In dot I am long oo, the white man. Some of them would run away, others would call out to their parents to come look. Others would run up and try to touch me to see if I was real. It was pandemonium."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"304"	" What I didn't understand at the time was that the other kids genuinely had no clue what a white person was."	"What I didn't understand at the time was that the other kids genuinely had no clue what a white person was."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"305"	" Black kids in the township didn't leave the township. Few people had televisions. They'd seen the white police roll through, but they'd never dealt with a white person face-to-face, ever."	"Black kids in the township didn't leave the township. Few people had televisions. They'd seen the white police roll through, but they'd never dealt with a white person face to face, ever."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"307"	" I think people felt like the dead person was more important because a white person had come to the funeral."	"I think people felt like the dead person was more important because a white person had come to the funeral."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"308"	" After a funeral, the mourners all go to the house of the surviving family to eat. A hundred people might show up, and you've got to feed them."	"After a funeral, the mourners all go to the house of the surviving family to eat. A hundred people might show up, and you've got to feed them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"309"	" Usually you get a cow and slaughter it and your neighbours come over and help you cook."	"Usually you get a cow and slaughter it and your neighbours come over and help you cook."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"31"	" In the township, that typically meant an outdoor, tent-revival-style church. We usually went to my grandmother's church, an old-school Methodist congregation, 500 African grannies in blue and white blouses clutching their Bibles and patiently burning in the hot African sun. Black church was rough, I won't lie. No air conditioning, no lyrics up on jumbotrons, and it lasted forever. Three or four hours, at least. Which confused me, because white church"	"In the township, that typically meant an outdoor, tent revival style church. We usually went to my grandmother's church, an old school Methodist congregation,  five hundred  African grannies in blue and white blouses clutching their Bibles and patiently burning in the hot African sun. Black church was rough, I won't lie. No air conditioning, no lyrics up on jumbotrons, and it lasted forever. Three or four hours, at least. Which confused me, because white church."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"311"	" As a kid, I understood that people were different colors. But in my head, white and black and brown were like types of chocolates. Dad was the white chocolate, mom was the dark chocolate, and I was the milk chocolate. But we were all just chocolates."	"As a kid, I understood that people were different colors. But in my head, white and black and brown were like types of chocolates. Dad was the white chocolate, mom was the dark chocolate, and I was the milk chocolate. But we were all just chocolates."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"312"	" I didn't know any of it had anything to do with race. I didn't know what race was. My mother never referred to my dad as white or to me as mixed. So when the other kids in Soreto called me white, even though I was light brown, I just thought they had their colors mixed up, like they hadn't learned them properly. Ah yes, my friend. You've confused Aqua with turquoise. I can see how you've made that mistake. You're not the first."	"I didn't know any of it had anything to do with race. I didn't know what race was. My mother never referred to my dad as white or to me as mixed. So when the other kids in Soreto called me white, even though I was light brown, I just thought they had their colors mixed up, like they hadn't learned them properly. Ah yes, my friend. You've confused Aqua with turquoise. I can see how you've made that mistake. You're not the first."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"313"	" I soon learned that the quickest way to bridge the race gap was through language. Soweto was a melting pot. Families from different tribes and homelands. Most kids in the township spoke only their home language. But I learned several languages because I grew up in a house where there was no option but to learn them. My mom made sure English was the first language I spoke."	"I soon learned that the quickest way to bridge the race gap was through language. Soweto was a melting pot. Families from different tribes and homelands. Most kids in the township spoke only their home language. But I learned several languages because I grew up in a house where there was no option but to learn them. My mom made sure English was the first language I spoke."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"314"	" If you're black in South Africa, speaking English is the one thing that can give you a leg up. English is the language of money. English comprehension is equated with intelligence. If you're looking for a job, English is the difference between getting the job or staying unemployed. If you're standing in the dock, English is the difference between getting off with a fine or going to prison."	"If you're black in South Africa, speaking English is the one thing that can give you a leg up. English is the language of money. English comprehension is equated with intelligence. If you're looking for a job, English is the difference between getting the job or staying unemployed. If you're standing in the dock, English is the difference between getting off with a fine or going to prison."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"316"	" Living with my mom, I saw how she used language to cross boundaries, handle situations, navigate the world."	"Living with my mom, I saw how she used language to cross boundaries, handle situations, navigate the world."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"317"	" We were in a shop once, and the shopkeeper right in front of us turned to his security guard and said, in Afrikaans, Follow those blacks in case they steal something. My mother turned around and said, Why don't you follow these blacks so you can help them find what they're looking for?"	"We were in a shop once, and the shopkeeper right in front of us turned to his security guard and said, in Afrikaans, Follow those blacks in case they steal something. My mother turned around and said, Why don't you follow these blacks so you can help them find what they're looking for?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"318"	" Oh, I'm so sorry, he said. I thought you were like the other blacks. You know how they love to steal."	"Oh, I'm so sorry, he said. I thought you were like the other blacks. You know how they love to steal."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"319"	" I learned to use language like my mother did. I would simulcast. Give you the program in your own tongue. I'd get suspicious looks from people just walking down the street. Where are you from? They'd ask. I'd reply in whatever language they'd addressed me in using the same accent that they used. There would be a brief moment of confusion and then the suspicious look would disappear. Oh, okay. I thought you were a stranger. We're good then."	"I learned to use language like my mother did. I would simulcast. Give you the program in your own tongue. I'd get suspicious looks from people just walking down the street. Where are you from? They'd ask. I'd reply in whatever language they'd addressed me in using the same accent that they used. There would be a brief moment of confusion and then the suspicious look would disappear. Oh, okay. I thought you were a stranger. We're good then."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"320"	" It became a tool that served me my whole life."	"It became a tool that served me my whole life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"321"	" One day as a young man, I was walking down the street and a group of Zulu guys was walking behind me, closing in on me. And I could hear them talking to one another about how they were going to mug me. Let's get this white guy. You go to his left and I'll come up behind him."	"One day as a young man, I was walking down the street and a group of Zulu guys was walking behind me, closing in on me. And I could hear them talking to one another about how they were going to mug me. Let's get this white guy. You go to his left and I'll come up behind him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"322"	" I didn't know what to do. I couldn't run. So I just spun around real quick and said, KOTRA BAFITU, YINGA NISINGA VELESI BAMBE MUNTUNGUNZI, ASEN ZENI, MINA NIGULINDEL. Yo guys, why don't we just mug someone together? I'm ready, let's do it."	"I didn't know what to do. I couldn't run. So I just spun around real quick and said, KOTRA BAFITU, YINGA NISINGA VELESI BAMBE MUNTUNGUNZI, ASEN ZENI, MINA NIGULINDEL. Yo guys, why don't we just mug someone together? I'm ready, let's do it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"323"	" They looked shocked for a moment. And then they started laughing. Oh, sorry, dude. We thought you were something else. We weren't trying to take anything from you. We were trying to steal from white people. Have a good day, man. They were ready to do me violent harm until they felt we were part of the same tribe. And then we were cool. That and so many other smaller incidents in my life made me realize that language, even more than color, defines who you are to people. I became a chameleon."	"They looked shocked for a moment. And then they started laughing. Oh, sorry, dude. We thought you were something else. We weren't trying to take anything from you. We were trying to steal from white people. Have a good day, man. They were ready to do me violent harm until they felt we were part of the same tribe. And then we were cool. That and so many other smaller incidents in my life made me realize that language, even more than color, defines who you are to people. I became a chameleon."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"325"	" Kids still got teased and bullied, but it was over usual kid stuff. Being fat or being skinny, being tall or being short, being smart or being dumb. I don't remember anyone being teased about their race. I didn't learn to put limits on what I was supposed to like or not like. I had a wide berth to explore myself. I had crushes on white girls, I had crushes on black girls. Nobody asked me what I was. I was Trevor."	"Kids still got teased and bullied, but it was over usual kid stuff. Being fat or being skinny, being tall or being short, being smart or being dumb. I don't remember anyone being teased about their race. I didn't learn to put limits on what I was supposed to like or not like. I had a wide berth to explore myself. I had crushes on white girls, I had crushes on black girls. Nobody asked me what I was. I was Trevor."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"326"	" It was a wonderful experience to have, but the downside was that it sheltered me from reality. Maryvale was an oasis that kept me from the truth, a comfortable place where I could avoid making a tough decision."	"It was a wonderful experience to have, but the downside was that it sheltered me from reality. Maryvale was an oasis that kept me from the truth, a comfortable place where I could avoid making a tough decision."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"327"	" But the real world doesn't go away. Racism exists. People are getting hurt. And just because it's not happening to you, doesn't mean it's not happening. And at some point, you have to choose."	"But the real world doesn't go away. Racism exists. People are getting hurt. And just because it's not happening to you, doesn't mean it's not happening. And at some point, you have to choose."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"328"	" black or white. Pick a side."	"black or white. Pick a side."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"33"	" I'm here to fill up on my blessings for the week, my mother used to say."	"I'm here to fill up on my blessings for the week, my mother used to say."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"330"	" At the end of grade 6, I left Maryville to go to H.A. Jack Primary, a government school. I had to take an aptitude test before I started, and based on the results of the test, the school counselor told me, you're going to be in the smart class, the A classes."	"At the end of grade  six , I left Maryville to go to H.A. Jack Primary, a government school. I had to take an aptitude test before I started, and based on the results of the test, the school counselor told me, you're going to be in the smart class, the A classes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"331"	" I showed up for the first day of school and went to my classroom. Of the 30 or so kids in my class, almost all of them were white. There was one Indian kid, maybe one or two black kids, and me."	"I showed up for the first day of school and went to my classroom. Of the  thirty  or so kids in my class, almost all of them were white. There was one Indian kid, maybe one or two black kids, and me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"332"	" Then recess came. We went out on the playground and black kids were everywhere. It was an ocean of black, like someone had opened a tap and all the black had come pouring out. I was like, where were they all hiding?"	"Then recess came. We went out on the playground and black kids were everywhere. It was an ocean of black, like someone had opened a tap and all the black had come pouring out. I was like, where were they all hiding?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"334"	" In the townships, you don't see segregation because everyone is black."	"In the townships, you don't see segregation because everyone is black."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"335"	" In the white world, anytime my mother took me to a white church, we were the only black people there. And my mom didn't separate herself from anyone. She didn't care. She'd go right up and sit with the white people. And at Maryvale, the kids were mixed up and hanging out together."	"In the white world, anytime my mother took me to a white church, we were the only black people there. And my mom didn't separate herself from anyone. She didn't care. She'd go right up and sit with the white people. And at Maryvale, the kids were mixed up and hanging out together."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"336"	" Before that day, I had never seen people being together and yet not together, occupying the same space, yet choosing not to associate with each other in any way. In an instant I could see, I could feel, how the boundaries were drawn. Groups moved in color patterns across the yard, up the stairs, down the hall. It was insane."	"Before that day, I had never seen people being together and yet not together, occupying the same space, yet choosing not to associate with each other in any way. In an instant I could see, I could feel, how the boundaries were drawn. Groups moved in color patterns across the yard, up the stairs, down the hall. It was insane."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"337"	" I looked over at the white kids I'd met that morning. Ten minutes earlier, I thought I was at a school where they were the majority. Now I realized how few of them they actually were compared to everyone else."	"I looked over at the white kids I'd met that morning. Ten minutes earlier, I thought I was at a school where they were the majority. Now I realized how few of them they actually were compared to everyone else."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"339"	" Through our conversation, it came up that I spoke several African languages. And Thessen thought a colored kid speaking black languages was the most amazing trick. He brought me over to a group of black kids. Say something, he told them, and he'll show you he understands you. One kid said something in Zulu, and I replied to him in Zulu. Everyone cheered. Another kid said something in Khosa, and I replied to him in Khosa. Everyone cheered. For the rest of recess, Thessen took me around to different"	"Through our conversation, it came up that I spoke several African languages. And Thessen thought a colored kid speaking black languages was the most amazing trick. He brought me over to a group of black kids. Say something, he told them, and he'll show you he understands you. One kid said something in Zulu, and I replied to him in Zulu. Everyone cheered. Another kid said something in Khosa, and I replied to him in Khosa. Everyone cheered. For the rest of recess, Thessen took me around to different."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"34"	" The more time we spent at church, she reckoned, the more blessings we accrued. Like a Starbucks rewards card."	"The more time we spent at church, she reckoned, the more blessings we accrued. Like a Starbucks rewards card."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"340"	" In South Africa, back then, it wasn't common to find a white person or a colored person who spoke African languages. During apartheid, white people were always taught that those languages were beneath them. So the fact that I did speak African languages immediately endeared me to the black kids. How come you speak our languages? they asked. Because I'm black, I said. Like you. You're not black. Yes, I am. No, you're not. Have you not seen yourself?"	"In South Africa, back then, it wasn't common to find a white person or a colored person who spoke African languages. During apartheid, white people were always taught that those languages were beneath them. So the fact that I did speak African languages immediately endeared me to the black kids. How come you speak our languages? they asked. Because I'm black, I said. Like you. You're not black. Yes, I am. No, you're not. Have you not seen yourself?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"341"	" They were confused at first. Because of my colour, they thought I was a coloured person. But speaking the same languages meant that I belonged to their tribe. It just took them a moment to figure it out. It took me a moment too."	"They were confused at first. Because of my colour, they thought I was a coloured person. But speaking the same languages meant that I belonged to their tribe. It just took them a moment to figure it out. It took me a moment too."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"343"	" That same afternoon, I went back to the A classes, and by the end of the day I realized that they weren't for me. Suddenly I knew who my people were, and I wanted to be with them. I went to see the school counselor. I'd like to switch over, I told her. I'd like to go to the B classes."	"That same afternoon, I went back to the A classes, and by the end of the day I realized that they weren't for me. Suddenly I knew who my people were, and I wanted to be with them. I went to see the school counselor. I'd like to switch over, I told her. I'd like to go to the B classes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"344"	" She was confused. Oh no, she said. I don't think you want to do that. Why not? Because those kids are, you know?"	"She was confused. Oh no, she said. I don't think you want to do that. Why not? Because those kids are, you know?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"345"	" No, I don't know. What do you mean?"	"No, I don't know. What do you mean?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"346"	" Look, she said. You're a smart kid. You don't want to be in that class. But aren't the classes the same? English is English. Math is math."	"Look, she said. You're a smart kid. You don't want to be in that class. But aren't the classes the same? English is English. Math is math."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"348"	" Finally, she gave me a stern warning."	"Finally, she gave me a stern warning."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"349"	" you do realize the effect this will have on your future. You do understand what you're giving up. This will impact the opportunities you'll have open to you for the rest of your life."	"you do realize the effect this will have on your future. You do understand what you're giving up. This will impact the opportunities you'll have open to you for the rest of your life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"35"	" Black Church had one saving grace. If I could make it to the third or fourth hour, I'd get to watch the pastor cast demons out of people. People possessed by demons would start running up and down the aisles like madmen, screaming in tongues. The ushers would tackle them like bouncers at a club and hold them down for the pastor. The pastor would grab their heads and violently shake them back and forth shouting, I cast out this spirit in the name of Jesus!"	"Black Church had one saving grace. If I could make it to the third or fourth hour, I'd get to watch the pastor cast demons out of people. People possessed by demons would start running up and down the aisles like madmen, screaming in tongues. The ushers would tackle them like bouncers at a club and hold them down for the pastor. The pastor would grab their heads and violently shake them back and forth shouting, I cast out this spirit in the name of Jesus!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"350"	" I'll take that chance."	"I'll take that chance."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"352"	" Being at H.A. Jack made me realize I was black."	"Being at H.A. Jack made me realize I was black."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"353"	" Before that recess, I'd never had to choose. But when I was forced to choose, I chose black."	"Before that recess, I'd never had to choose. But when I was forced to choose, I chose black."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"354"	" The world saw me as colored, but I didn't spend my life looking at myself. I spent my life looking at other people. I saw myself as the people around me, and the people around me were black. My cousins are black. My mom is black. My gran is black. I grew up black."	"The world saw me as colored, but I didn't spend my life looking at myself. I spent my life looking at other people. I saw myself as the people around me, and the people around me were black. My cousins are black. My mom is black. My gran is black. I grew up black."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"355"	" Because I had a white father, because I'd been in white Sunday school, I got along with the white kids, but I didn't belong with the white kids. I wasn't a part of their tribe. But the black kids embraced me. Come along, they said. You're rolling with us. With the black kids, I wasn't constantly trying to be. With the black kids, I just was."	"Because I had a white father, because I'd been in white Sunday school, I got along with the white kids, but I didn't belong with the white kids. I wasn't a part of their tribe. But the black kids embraced me. Come along, they said. You're rolling with us. With the black kids, I wasn't constantly trying to be. With the black kids, I just was."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"357"	" The only way to make apartheid work, therefore, was to cripple the black mind."	"The only way to make apartheid work, therefore, was to cripple the black mind."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"358"	" Under apartheid, the government built what became known as Bantu schools."	"Under apartheid, the government built what became known as Bantu schools."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"359"	" Bantu schools taught no science, no history, no civics. They taught metrics and agriculture. How to count potatoes, how to pave roads, chop wood, till the soil."	"Bantu schools taught no science, no history, no civics. They taught metrics and agriculture. How to count potatoes, how to pave roads, chop wood, till the soil."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"36"	" Some pastors were more violent than others, but what they all shared in common was that they wouldn't stop until the demon was gone and the congregant had gone limp and collapsed on the stage. The person had to fall, because if he didn't fall, that meant the demon was powerful and the pastor needed to come at him even harder. You could be a linebacker in the NFL, didn't matter, that pastor was taking you down. Good lord that was fun."	"Some pastors were more violent than others, but what they all shared in common was that they wouldn't stop until the demon was gone and the congregant had gone limp and collapsed on the stage. The person had to fall, because if he didn't fall, that meant the demon was powerful and the pastor needed to come at him even harder. You could be a linebacker in the NFL, didn't matter, that pastor was taking you down. Good lord that was fun."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"361"	" Why educate a slave?"	"Why educate a slave?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"362"	" Why teach someone Latin when his only purpose is to dig holes in the ground?"	"Why teach someone Latin when his only purpose is to dig holes in the ground?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"363"	" Mission schools were told to conform to the new curriculum or shutdown."	"Mission schools were told to conform to the new curriculum or shutdown."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"364"	" Most of them shut down, and black children were forced into crowded classrooms in dilapidated schools, often with teachers who were barely literate themselves. Our parents and grandparents were taught with little sing-song lessons, the way you teach a preschooler shapes and colors. My grandfather used to sing the songs and laugh about how silly they were. Two times two is four, three times two is six, la la la la la. We're talking about fully grown teenagers being taught this way."	"Most of them shut down, and black children were forced into crowded classrooms in dilapidated schools, often with teachers who were barely literate themselves. Our parents and grandparents were taught with little sing song lessons, the way you teach a preschooler shapes and colors. My grandfather used to sing the songs and laugh about how silly they were. Two times two is four, three times two is six, la la la la la. We're talking about fully grown teenagers being taught this way."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"366"	" The Afrikaners never gave us that option."	"The Afrikaners never gave us that option."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"367"	" British racism said, if the monkey can walk like a man and talk like a man, then perhaps he is a man. Afrikaner racism said, why give a book to a monkey?"	"British racism said, if the monkey can walk like a man and talk like a man, then perhaps he is a man. Afrikaner racism said, why give a book to a monkey?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"368"	" 5. The second girl."	" five . The second girl."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"369"	" My mother used to tell me, I chose to have you because I wanted something to love and something that would love me unconditionally in return."	"My mother used to tell me, I chose to have you because I wanted something to love and something that would love me unconditionally in return."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"370"	" I was a product of her search for belonging. She never felt like she belonged anywhere. She didn't belong to her mother, didn't belong to her father, didn't belong with her siblings. She grew up with nothing and wanted something to call her own."	"I was a product of her search for belonging. She never felt like she belonged anywhere. She didn't belong to her mother, didn't belong to her father, didn't belong with her siblings. She grew up with nothing and wanted something to call her own."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"371"	" My grandparents' marriage was an unhappy one. They met and married in Sophia town, but one year later the army came in and drove them out. The government seized their home and bulldozed the whole area to build a fancy, new, white suburb. Triomph. Triumph."	"My grandparents' marriage was an unhappy one. They met and married in Sophia town, but one year later the army came in and drove them out. The government seized their home and bulldozed the whole area to build a fancy, new, white suburb. Triomph. Triumph."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"372"	" Along with tens of thousands of other black people, my grandparents were forcibly relocated to Soweto, to a neighborhood called the Middlelands. They divorced not long after that, and my grandmother moved to Orlando with my mom, my aunt, and my uncle."	"Along with tens of thousands of other black people, my grandparents were forcibly relocated to Soweto, to a neighborhood called the Middlelands. They divorced not long after that, and my grandmother moved to Orlando with my mom, my aunt, and my uncle."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"373"	" My mom was the problem child. A tomboy. Stubborn. Defiant. My grand had no idea how to raise her. Whatever love they had was lost in the constant fighting that went on between them. But my mom adored her father. The charming, charismatic temperance. She went gallivanting with him on his manic misadventures. She'd tag along when he'd go drinking in the Shabines. All she wanted in life was to please him and to be with him."	"My mom was the problem child. A tomboy. Stubborn. Defiant. My grand had no idea how to raise her. Whatever love they had was lost in the constant fighting that went on between them. But my mom adored her father. The charming, charismatic temperance. She went gallivanting with him on his manic misadventures. She'd tag along when he'd go drinking in the Shabines. All she wanted in life was to please him and to be with him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"375"	" If that's what you want, Gran said, then go."	"If that's what you want, Gran said, then go."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"376"	" Temperance came to pick up my mom, and she happily bounded up into his car, ready to go and be with the man she loved. But instead of taking her to live with him in the Middlelands, without even telling her why, he packed her off and sent her to live with his sister in the Tossar homeland, Transky. He didn't want her either."	"Temperance came to pick up my mom, and she happily bounded up into his car, ready to go and be with the man she loved. But instead of taking her to live with him in the Middlelands, without even telling her why, he packed her off and sent her to live with his sister in the Tossar homeland, Transky. He didn't want her either."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"377"	" My mom was the middle child. Her sister was the eldest and first born. Her brother was the only son, bearer of the family name. They both stayed in Soweto, were both raised and cared for by their parents. But my mom was unwanted. She was the second girl. The only place she would have had less value would be in China."	"My mom was the middle child. Her sister was the eldest and first born. Her brother was the only son, bearer of the family name. They both stayed in Soweto, were both raised and cared for by their parents. But my mom was unwanted. She was the second girl. The only place she would have had less value would be in China."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"378"	" My mother didn't see her family again for 12 years. She lived in a hut with 14 cousins, 14 children from 14 different mothers and fathers. All the husbands and uncles had gone off to the cities to find work, and the children who weren't wanted, or whom no one could afford to feed, had been sent back to the homeland to live on this aunt's farm."	"My mother didn't see her family again for  twelve  years. She lived in a hut with  fourteen  cousins,  fourteen  children from  fourteen  different mothers and fathers. All the husbands and uncles had gone off to the cities to find work, and the children who weren't wanted, or whom no one could afford to feed, had been sent back to the homeland to live on this aunt's farm."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"38"	" We lived in Eden Park, a tiny suburb way outside Johannesburg."	"We lived in Eden Park, a tiny suburb way outside Johannesburg."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"380"	" Where South Africa's white countryside was lush and irrigated and green, the black lands were overpopulated and overgrazed, the soil depleted and eroding. Other than the menial wages sent home from the cities, families scraped by with little beyond subsistence-level farming."	"Where South Africa's white countryside was lush and irrigated and green, the black lands were overpopulated and overgrazed, the soil depleted and eroding. Other than the menial wages sent home from the cities, families scraped by with little beyond subsistence level farming."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"381"	" My mother's aunt hadn't taken her in out of charity. She was there to work."	"My mother's aunt hadn't taken her in out of charity. She was there to work."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"382"	" I was one of the cows, my mother would later say. One of the oxen."	"I was one of the cows, my mother would later say. One of the oxen."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"384"	" For dinner, there might be one chicken to feed 14 children. My mom would have to fight with the bigger kids to get a handful of meat or a sip of the gravy, or even a bone from which to suck out some marrow."	"For dinner, there might be one chicken to feed  fourteen  children. My mom would have to fight with the bigger kids to get a handful of meat or a sip of the gravy, or even a bone from which to suck out some marrow."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"385"	" And that's when there was food for dinner at all. When there wasn't, she'd steal food from the pigs. She'd steal food from the dogs. The farmers would put out scraps for the animals and she'd jump for it. She was hungry. Let the animals fend for themselves."	"And that's when there was food for dinner at all. When there wasn't, she'd steal food from the pigs. She'd steal food from the dogs. The farmers would put out scraps for the animals and she'd jump for it. She was hungry. Let the animals fend for themselves."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"386"	" There were times when she literally ate dirt. She would go down to the river, take the clay from the riverbank, and mix it with the water to make a grayish kind of milk. She'd drink that to feel full."	"There were times when she literally ate dirt. She would go down to the river, take the clay from the riverbank, and mix it with the water to make a grayish kind of milk. She'd drink that to feel full."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"387"	" But my mother was blessed that her village was one of the places where a mission school had contrived to stay open in spite of the government's buntu education policies. There, she had a white pastor who taught her English. She didn't have food or shoes or even a pair of underwear, but she had English. She could read and write. When she was old enough, she stopped working on the farm and got a job at a factory in a nearby town. She worked on a sewing machine, making school uniforms,"	"But my mother was blessed that her village was one of the places where a mission school had contrived to stay open in spite of the government's buntu education policies. There, she had a white pastor who taught her English. She didn't have food or shoes or even a pair of underwear, but she had English. She could read and write. When she was old enough, she stopped working on the farm and got a job at a factory in a nearby town. She worked on a sewing machine, making school uniforms,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"389"	" My mom wrote to my gran, asking her to send the price of a train ticket, about 30 rand, to bring her home."	"My mom wrote to my gran, asking her to send the price of a train ticket, about  thirty  rand, to bring her home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"39"	" It took us an hour to get to White Church, another 45 minutes to get to mixed church, and then another 45 minutes to drive out to Soweto for Black Church. Then, if that weren't bad enough, some Sundays, we'd double back to White Church for a special evening service. By the time we finally got home at night, I'd collapse into bed."	"It took us an hour to get to White Church, another  forty five  minutes to get to mixed church, and then another  forty five  minutes to drive out to Soweto for Black Church. Then, if that weren't bad enough, some Sundays, we'd double back to White Church for a special evening service. By the time we finally got home at night, I'd collapse into bed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"390"	" Back in Soweto, my mom enrolled in the secretarial course that allowed her to grab hold of the bottom rung of the white-collar world. She worked, and worked, and worked. But, living under my grandmother's roof, she wasn't allowed to keep her own wages. As a secretary, my mom was bringing home more money than anyone else, and my grandmother insisted it all go to the family."	"Back in Soweto, my mom enrolled in the secretarial course that allowed her to grab hold of the bottom rung of the white collar world. She worked, and worked, and worked. But, living under my grandmother's roof, she wasn't allowed to keep her own wages. As a secretary, my mom was bringing home more money than anyone else, and my grandmother insisted it all go to the family."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"391"	" The family needed a radio, an oven, a refrigerator, and it was now my mom's job to provide it. So many black families spend all their time trying to fix the problems of the past. That is the curse of being black and poor. And it is a curse that follows you from generation to generation. My mother calls it the Black Tax. Because the generations who came before you have been pillaged, rather than being free to use your skills and education to move forward, you lose everything just trying to bring"	"The family needed a radio, an oven, a refrigerator, and it was now my mom's job to provide it. So many black families spend all their time trying to fix the problems of the past. That is the curse of being black and poor. And it is a curse that follows you from generation to generation. My mother calls it the Black Tax. Because the generations who came before you have been pillaged, rather than being free to use your skills and education to move forward, you lose everything just trying to bring."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"393"	" My mother never sat me down and told me the whole story of her life in Transky. She'd give me little bursts, random details, stories of having to keep her wits about her to avoid getting raped by strange men in the village. She'd tell me these things and I'd be like, lady, clearly you do not know what kind of stories to be telling a 10 year old."	"My mother never sat me down and told me the whole story of her life in Transky. She'd give me little bursts, random details, stories of having to keep her wits about her to avoid getting raped by strange men in the village. She'd tell me these things and I'd be like, lady, clearly you do not know what kind of stories to be telling a  ten  year old."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"394"	" My mom told me these things so that I'd never take for granted how we got to where we were. But none of it ever came from a place of self-pity."	"My mom told me these things so that I'd never take for granted how we got to where we were. But none of it ever came from a place of self pity."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"395"	" Learn from your past and be better because of your past, she would say. But don't cry about your past. Life is full of pain. Let the pain sharpen you, but don't hold on to it. Don't be bitter."	"Learn from your past and be better because of your past, she would say. But don't cry about your past. Life is full of pain. Let the pain sharpen you, but don't hold on to it. Don't be bitter."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"396"	" And she never was. The deprivations of her youth, the betrayals of her parents, she never complained about any of it."	"And she never was. The deprivations of her youth, the betrayals of her parents, she never complained about any of it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"398"	" Then you have my mother, Patricia Nombuicello Noah. She who gives back."	"Then you have my mother, Patricia Nombuicello Noah. She who gives back."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"399"	" That's what she does. She gives and gives and gives."	"That's what she does. She gives and gives and gives."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"4"	" 1. Any European male who has illicit carnal intercourse with a native female, and any native male who has illicit carnal intercourse with a European female, shall be guilty of an offence and liable on conviction to imprisonment for a period not exceeding five years."	" one . Any European male who has illicit carnal intercourse with a native female, and any native male who has illicit carnal intercourse with a European female, shall be guilty of an offence and liable on conviction to imprisonment for a period not exceeding five years."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"40"	" This particular Sunday, the Sunday I was hurled from a moving car, started out like any other Sunday. My mother woke me up, made me porridge for breakfast. I took my bath while she dressed my baby brother Andrew, who was nine months old. Then we went out to the driveway. But once we were finally all strapped in and ready to go, the car wouldn't start."	"This particular Sunday, the Sunday I was hurled from a moving car, started out like any other Sunday. My mother woke me up, made me porridge for breakfast. I took my bath while she dressed my baby brother Andrew, who was nine months old. Then we went out to the driveway. But once we were finally all strapped in and ready to go, the car wouldn't start."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"401"	" She gave me the tools to do it as well. She taught me English as my first language. She read to me constantly. The first book I learned to read was THE book, the Bible. Church was where we got most of our other books too. My mom would bring home boxes that white people had donated. Picture books, chapter books, any book she could get her hands on. Then she signed up for a subscription program where we got books in the mail. It was a series of how-to books. How to be a good friend."	"She gave me the tools to do it as well. She taught me English as my first language. She read to me constantly. The first book I learned to read was THE book, the Bible. Church was where we got most of our other books too. My mom would bring home boxes that white people had donated. Picture books, chapter books, any book she could get her hands on. Then she signed up for a subscription program where we got books in the mail. It was a series of how to books. How to be a good friend."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"402"	" My books were my prized possessions. I had a bookshelf where I put them, and I was so proud of it. I loved my books and kept them in pristine condition. I read them over and over, but I did not bend the pages or the spines. I treasured every single one."	"My books were my prized possessions. I had a bookshelf where I put them, and I was so proud of it. I loved my books and kept them in pristine condition. I read them over and over, but I did not bend the pages or the spines. I treasured every single one."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"403"	" As I grew older, I started buying my own books. I loved fantasy. I loved to get lost in worlds that didn't exist. I remember there was some book about white boys who solved mysteries or some shit. I had no time for that. Give me Roald Dahl, James and the Giant Peach, the BFG, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, the wonderful story of Henry Sugar. That was my fix."	"As I grew older, I started buying my own books. I loved fantasy. I loved to get lost in worlds that didn't exist. I remember there was some book about white boys who solved mysteries or some shit. I had no time for that. Give me Roald Dahl, James and the Giant Peach, the BFG, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, the wonderful story of Henry Sugar. That was my fix."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"404"	" I had to fight to convince my mom to get the Narnia books for me. She didn't like them."	"I had to fight to convince my mom to get the Narnia books for me. She didn't like them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"406"	" Eventually I wore her down. That was a big win."	"Eventually I wore her down. That was a big win."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"407"	" If my mother had one goal, it was to free my mind. My mother spoke to me like an adult, which was unusual. In South Africa, kids play with kids and adults talk to adults. The adults supervise you, but they don't get down on your level and talk to you. My mom did. All the time. I was like her best friend. She was always telling me stories, giving me lessons, Bible lessons especially. She was big into Psalms. I had to read Psalms every day. She would quiz me on it."	"If my mother had one goal, it was to free my mind. My mother spoke to me like an adult, which was unusual. In South Africa, kids play with kids and adults talk to adults. The adults supervise you, but they don't get down on your level and talk to you. My mom did. All the time. I was like her best friend. She was always telling me stories, giving me lessons, Bible lessons especially. She was big into Psalms. I had to read Psalms every day. She would quiz me on it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"408"	" That was every day of my life. My mom did what school didn't. She taught me how to think."	"That was every day of my life. My mom did what school didn't. She taught me how to think."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"409"	" The end of apartheid was a gradual thing. It wasn't like the Berlin Wall where one day it just came down. Apartheid's walls cracked and crumbled over many years. Concessions were made here and there. Some laws were repealed. Others simply weren't enforced."	"The end of apartheid was a gradual thing. It wasn't like the Berlin Wall where one day it just came down. Apartheid's walls cracked and crumbled over many years. Concessions were made here and there. Some laws were repealed. Others simply weren't enforced."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"410"	" There came a point in the months before Mandela's release, when we could live less furtively."	"There came a point in the months before Mandela's release, when we could live less furtively."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"411"	" It was then that my mother decided we needed to move."	"It was then that my mother decided we needed to move."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"412"	" She felt we had grown as much as we could hiding in our tiny flats in town."	"She felt we had grown as much as we could hiding in our tiny flats in town."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"413"	" The country was open now. Where would we go? Soweto came with its burdens. My mother still wanted to get out from the shadow of her family. My mother also couldn't walk with me through Soweto without people saying, there goes that prostitute with a white man's child. In a black area, she would always be seen as that. So since my mom didn't want to move to a black area and couldn't afford to move to a white area, she decided to move to a colored area."	"The country was open now. Where would we go? Soweto came with its burdens. My mother still wanted to get out from the shadow of her family. My mother also couldn't walk with me through Soweto without people saying, there goes that prostitute with a white man's child. In a black area, she would always be seen as that. So since my mom didn't want to move to a black area and couldn't afford to move to a white area, she decided to move to a colored area."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"415"	" Half-colored and half-black, she figured, like us. We'd be camouflaged there."	"Half colored and half black, she figured, like us. We'd be camouflaged there."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"416"	" It didn't work out that way. We never fit in at all. But that was her thinking when we made the move. Plus, it was a chance to buy a home. Our own home. Eden Park was one of those suburbs that are actually out on the edge of civilization. The kind of place where property developers have said, hey, poor people, you can live the good life too. Here's a house in the middle of nowhere, but look, you have a yard."	"It didn't work out that way. We never fit in at all. But that was her thinking when we made the move. Plus, it was a chance to buy a home. Our own home. Eden Park was one of those suburbs that are actually out on the edge of civilization. The kind of place where property developers have said, hey, poor people, you can live the good life too. Here's a house in the middle of nowhere, but look, you have a yard."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"417"	" For some reason, the streets in Eden Park were named after cars. Jaguar Street. Ferrari Street. Honda Street. I don't know if that was a coincidence or not, but it's funny because colored people in South Africa are known for loving fancy cars. It was like living in a white neighborhood with all the streets named after varietals of fine wine."	"For some reason, the streets in Eden Park were named after cars. Jaguar Street. Ferrari Street. Honda Street. I don't know if that was a coincidence or not, but it's funny because colored people in South Africa are known for loving fancy cars. It was like living in a white neighborhood with all the streets named after varietals of fine wine."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"418"	" I remember moving out there in flashbacks, snippets, driving to a place I'd never seen, seeing people I'd never seen."	"I remember moving out there in flashbacks, snippets, driving to a place I'd never seen, seeing people I'd never seen."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"42"	" To this day, I hate second-hand cars. Almost everything that's gone wrong in my life, I can trace back to a second-hand car. Second-hand cars made me get detention for being late for school. Second-hand cars left us hitchhiking on the side of the freeway. A second-hand car was also the reason my mom got married."	"To this day, I hate second hand cars. Almost everything that's gone wrong in my life, I can trace back to a second hand car. Second hand cars made me get detention for being late for school. Second hand cars left us hitchhiking on the side of the freeway. A second hand car was also the reason my mom got married."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"420"	" We are rarely living. It was crazy to have my own room. I didn't like it. My whole life I'd slept in a room with my mom or on the floor with my cousins. I was used to having other human beings right next to me. So I slept in my mom's bed most nights."	"We are rarely living. It was crazy to have my own room. I didn't like it. My whole life I'd slept in a room with my mom or on the floor with my cousins. I was used to having other human beings right next to me. So I slept in my mom's bed most nights."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"421"	" There was no stepfather in the picture yet, no baby brother crying in the night. It was me and her, alone."	"There was no stepfather in the picture yet, no baby brother crying in the night. It was me and her, alone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"422"	" There was the sense of the two of us embarking on a grand adventure. She'd say things to me like, it's you and me against the world."	"There was the sense of the two of us embarking on a grand adventure. She'd say things to me like, it's you and me against the world."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"424"	" It was when we moved to Eden Park that we finally got a car. The beat-up tangerine Volkswagen my mother bought secondhand for next to nothing. One out of five times it wouldn't start. There was no AC. Anytime I made the mistake of turning on the fan, the vent would fart bits of leaves and dust all over me. Whenever it broke down, we'd catch minibuses or sometimes we'd hitchhike. She'd make me hide in the bushes because she knew men would stop for a woman, but not a woman with a child."	"It was when we moved to Eden Park that we finally got a car. The beat up tangerine Volkswagen my mother bought secondhand for next to nothing. One out of five times it wouldn't start. There was no AC. Anytime I made the mistake of turning on the fan, the vent would fart bits of leaves and dust all over me. Whenever it broke down, we'd catch minibuses or sometimes we'd hitchhike. She'd make me hide in the bushes because she knew men would stop for a woman, but not a woman with a child."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"425"	" When the car did work, we had the windows down, sputtering along and baking in the heat. For my entire life, the dial on that car's radio stayed on one station. It was called Radio Pulpit. And as the name suggests, it was nothing but preaching and praise."	"When the car did work, we had the windows down, sputtering along and baking in the heat. For my entire life, the dial on that car's radio stayed on one station. It was called Radio Pulpit. And as the name suggests, it was nothing but preaching and praise."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"426"	" I wasn't allowed to touch that dial. Anytime the radio wasn't getting reception, my mom would pop in a cassette of Jimmy Swaggart's sermons. When we finally found out about the scandal, oh man, that was rough."	"I wasn't allowed to touch that dial. Anytime the radio wasn't getting reception, my mom would pop in a cassette of Jimmy Swaggart's sermons. When we finally found out about the scandal, oh man, that was rough."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"427"	" But as shitty as our car was, it was a car. It was freedom. We weren't black people stuck in the townships waiting for public transport. We were black people who were out in the world. We were black people who could wake up and say, where do we choose to go today?"	"But as shitty as our car was, it was a car. It was freedom. We weren't black people stuck in the townships waiting for public transport. We were black people who were out in the world. We were black people who could wake up and say, where do we choose to go today?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"429"	" She'd put me on her lap and let me steer and work the indicators while she worked the pedals and the stick shift. After a few months of that, she taught me how to work the stick. She was still working the clutch, but I'd climb onto her lap and take the stick, and she'd call out the gears as we drove. There was this one part of the road that ran deep into a valley and then back up on the other side. We'd get up ahead of speed and we'd stick it into neutral and let go of the brake and the clutch and woo! We'd race down the hill and then zoom! We'd shoot up the other side."	"She'd put me on her lap and let me steer and work the indicators while she worked the pedals and the stick shift. After a few months of that, she taught me how to work the stick. She was still working the clutch, but I'd climb onto her lap and take the stick, and she'd call out the gears as we drove. There was this one part of the road that ran deep into a valley and then back up on the other side. We'd get up ahead of speed and we'd stick it into neutral and let go of the brake and the clutch and woo! We'd race down the hill and then zoom! We'd shoot up the other side."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"43"	" If it hadn't been for the Volkswagen that didn't work, we never would have looked for the mechanic who became the husband, who became the stepfather, who became the man who tortured us for years and put a bullet into the back of my mother's head."	"If it hadn't been for the Volkswagen that didn't work, we never would have looked for the mechanic who became the husband, who became the stepfather, who became the man who tortured us for years and put a bullet into the back of my mother's head."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"430"	" If we weren't at school or work or church we were out exploring."	"If we weren't at school or work or church we were out exploring."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"431"	" My mom's attitude was, I chose you kid. I brought you into this world and I'm gonna give you everything I never had."	"My mom's attitude was, I chose you kid. I brought you into this world and I'm gonna give you everything I never had."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"433"	" My mom would sit under a tree and read the Bible, and I'd run and play and play and play."	"My mom would sit under a tree and read the Bible, and I'd run and play and play and play."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"434"	" On Sunday afternoons, after church, we'd go for drives out in the country. My mom would find places with beautiful views for us to sit and have a picnic."	"On Sunday afternoons, after church, we'd go for drives out in the country. My mom would find places with beautiful views for us to sit and have a picnic."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"435"	" There was none of the fanfare over picnic baskets or plates or anything like that. Only bologna and brown bread and margarine sandwiches wrapped up in butcher paper. To this day, bologna and brown bread and margarine will instantly take me back. You can come with all the Michelin stars in the world. Just give me bologna and brown bread and margarine, and I'm in heaven."	"There was none of the fanfare over picnic baskets or plates or anything like that. Only bologna and brown bread and margarine sandwiches wrapped up in butcher paper. To this day, bologna and brown bread and margarine will instantly take me back. You can come with all the Michelin stars in the world. Just give me bologna and brown bread and margarine, and I'm in heaven."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"436"	" Food, or the access to food, was always the measure of how good or bad things were going in our lives. My mom would always say, my job is to feed your body, feed your spirits, and feed your mind. And that's exactly what she did. And the way she found money for food and books was to spend absolutely nothing on anything else. Her frugality was the stuff of legend. Our car was a tin can on wheels, and we lived in the middle of nowhere. We had threadbare furniture,"	"Food, or the access to food, was always the measure of how good or bad things were going in our lives. My mom would always say, my job is to feed your body, feed your spirits, and feed your mind. And that's exactly what she did. And the way she found money for food and books was to spend absolutely nothing on anything else. Her frugality was the stuff of legend. Our car was a tin can on wheels, and we lived in the middle of nowhere. We had threadbare furniture,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"438"	" We got by with next to nothing. But we always had church, and we always had books, and we always had food. Mind you, it wasn't necessarily good food. Meat was a luxury. When things were going well, we'd have chicken. My mom was an expert at cracking open a chicken bone and getting out every last bit of the marrow inside. We didn't eat chickens. We obliterated them. Our family was an archaeologist's nightmare. We left no bones behind."	"We got by with next to nothing. But we always had church, and we always had books, and we always had food. Mind you, it wasn't necessarily good food. Meat was a luxury. When things were going well, we'd have chicken. My mom was an expert at cracking open a chicken bone and getting out every last bit of the marrow inside. We didn't eat chickens. We obliterated them. Our family was an archaeologist's nightmare. We left no bones behind."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"439"	" The butcher sold bones, too. We called them soup bones, but they were actually labeled dog bones in the store. People would cook them for their dogs as a treat. Whenever times were really tough, we'd fall back on dog bones. My mom would boil them for soup. We'd suck the marrow out of them. Sucking marrow out of bones is a skill poor people learn early."	"The butcher sold bones, too. We called them soup bones, but they were actually labeled dog bones in the store. People would cook them for their dogs as a treat. Whenever times were really tough, we'd fall back on dog bones. My mom would boil them for soup. We'd suck the marrow out of them. Sucking marrow out of bones is a skill poor people learn early."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"44"	" I'll take the new car with the warranty every time."	"I'll take the new car with the warranty every time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"440"	" I'll never forget the first time I went to a fancy restaurant as a grown man and someone told me, you have to try the bone marrow, it's such a delicacy, it's divine. They ordered it, the waiter brought it out, and I was like, dog bones, motherfucker? I was not impressed."	"I'll never forget the first time I went to a fancy restaurant as a grown man and someone told me, you have to try the bone marrow, it's such a delicacy, it's divine. They ordered it, the waiter brought it out, and I was like, dog bones, motherfucker? I was not impressed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"442"	" Sometimes we'd pull over and go up to the wall, and she'd put me up on her shoulders like I was a little periscope. I would look into the yards and describe everything I was seeing. It's a big white house. They have two dogs. There's a lemon tree. They have a swimming pool. And a tennis court."	"Sometimes we'd pull over and go up to the wall, and she'd put me up on her shoulders like I was a little periscope. I would look into the yards and describe everything I was seeing. It's a big white house. They have two dogs. There's a lemon tree. They have a swimming pool. And a tennis court."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"443"	" My mother took me to places black people never went. She refused to be bound by ridiculous ideas of what black people couldn't or shouldn't do. She'd take me to the ice rink to go skating."	"My mother took me to places black people never went. She refused to be bound by ridiculous ideas of what black people couldn't or shouldn't do. She'd take me to the ice rink to go skating."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"444"	" Johannesburg used to have this epic drive-in movie theater. Top star drive-in. On top of a massive mind dump outside the city. She'd take me to movies there. We'd get snacks, hang the speaker on our car window. Top star had a 360-degree view of the city, the suburbs, Soweto. Up there I could see for miles in every direction. I felt like I was on top of the world."	"Johannesburg used to have this epic drive in movie theater. Top star drive in. On top of a massive mind dump outside the city. She'd take me to movies there. We'd get snacks, hang the speaker on our car window. Top star had a  three hundred and sixty  degree view of the city, the suburbs, Soweto. Up there I could see for miles in every direction. I felt like I was on top of the world."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"445"	" My mom raised me as if there were no limitations on where I could go or what I could do. When I look back, I realize she raised me like a white kid. Not white culturally, but in the sense of believing that the world was my oyster. That I should speak up for myself. That my ideas and thoughts and decisions mattered."	"My mom raised me as if there were no limitations on where I could go or what I could do. When I look back, I realize she raised me like a white kid. Not white culturally, but in the sense of believing that the world was my oyster. That I should speak up for myself. That my ideas and thoughts and decisions mattered."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"447"	" Growing up in Soweto, our dream was to put another room on our house. Maybe have a driveway. Maybe someday, a cast iron gate at the end of the driveway. Because that was all we knew."	"Growing up in Soweto, our dream was to put another room on our house. Maybe have a driveway. Maybe someday, a cast iron gate at the end of the driveway. Because that was all we knew."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"448"	" But the highest rung of what's possible is far beyond the world you can see."	"But the highest rung of what's possible is far beyond the world you can see."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"449"	" My mother showed me what was possible."	"My mother showed me what was possible."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"45"	" As much as I loved church, the idea of a 9 hour slog from mixed church to white church to black church then doubling back to white church again was just too much to contemplate. It was bad enough in a car, but taking public transport would be twice as long and twice as hard."	"As much as I loved church, the idea of a  nine  hour slog from mixed church to white church to black church then doubling back to white church again was just too much to contemplate. It was bad enough in a car, but taking public transport would be twice as long and twice as hard."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"451"	" Perhaps even more amazing is the fact that my mother started her little project, me, at a time when she could not have known that apartheid would end."	"Perhaps even more amazing is the fact that my mother started her little project, me, at a time when she could not have known that apartheid would end."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"452"	" There was no reason to think it would end. It had seen generations come and go."	"There was no reason to think it would end. It had seen generations come and go."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"453"	" I was nearly six when Mandela was released. Ten before democracy finally came. Yet she was preparing me to live a life of freedom long before we knew freedom would exist."	"I was nearly six when Mandela was released. Ten before democracy finally came. Yet she was preparing me to live a life of freedom long before we knew freedom would exist."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"454"	" A hard life in the township, or a trip to the colored orphanage, were the far more likely options on the table. But we never lived that way. We only moved forward, and we always moved fast. And by the time the law and everyone else came around, we were already miles down the road, flying across the freeway in a bright orange, piece of shit Volkswagen with the windows down and Jimmy Swagget praising Jesus at the top of his lungs."	"A hard life in the township, or a trip to the colored orphanage, were the far more likely options on the table. But we never lived that way. We only moved forward, and we always moved fast. And by the time the law and everyone else came around, we were already miles down the road, flying across the freeway in a bright orange, piece of shit Volkswagen with the windows down and Jimmy Swagget praising Jesus at the top of his lungs."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"456"	" So many black people had internalized the logic of apartheid and made it their own."	"So many black people had internalized the logic of apartheid and made it their own."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"457"	" Why teach a black child white things? Neighbours and relatives used to pester my mom. Why do all this? Why show him the world when he's never going to leave the ghetto?"	"Why teach a black child white things? Neighbours and relatives used to pester my mom. Why do all this? Why show him the world when he's never going to leave the ghetto?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"458"	" Because, she would say, even if he never leaves the ghetto, he will know that the ghetto is not the world. If that's all I accomplish, I've done enough."	"Because, she would say, even if he never leaves the ghetto, he will know that the ghetto is not the world. If that's all I accomplish, I've done enough."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"459"	" Apartheid, for all its power, had fatal flaws baked in starting with the fact that it never made any sense. Racism is not logical. Consider this. Chinese people were classified as black in South Africa. I don't mean they were running around acting black. They were still Chinese. But unlike Indians, they weren't enough Chinese people to warrant devising a whole separate classification. Apartheid, despite its intricacies and precision, didn't know what to do with it."	"Apartheid, for all its power, had fatal flaws baked in starting with the fact that it never made any sense. Racism is not logical. Consider this. Chinese people were classified as black in South Africa. I don't mean they were running around acting black. They were still Chinese. But unlike Indians, they weren't enough Chinese people to warrant devising a whole separate classification. Apartheid, despite its intricacies and precision, didn't know what to do with it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"460"	" Interestingly, at the same time, Japanese people were labeled as white. The reason for this was that the South African government wanted to establish good relations with the Japanese in order to import their fancy cars and electronics. So, Japanese people were given honorary white status, while Chinese people stayed black."	"Interestingly, at the same time, Japanese people were labeled as white. The reason for this was that the South African government wanted to establish good relations with the Japanese in order to import their fancy cars and electronics. So, Japanese people were given honorary white status, while Chinese people stayed black."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"461"	" I always like to imagine being a South African policeman who likely couldn't tell the difference between Chinese and Japanese but whose job was to make sure that people of the wrong color weren't doing the wrong thing. If he saw an Asian person sitting on a whites-only bench, what would he say? Hey, get off that bench you China man! Excuse me, I'm Japanese. Oh, I apologize sir. I didn't mean to be racist. Have a lovely afternoon."	"I always like to imagine being a South African policeman who likely couldn't tell the difference between Chinese and Japanese but whose job was to make sure that people of the wrong color weren't doing the wrong thing. If he saw an Asian person sitting on a whites only bench, what would he say? Hey, get off that bench you China man! Excuse me, I'm Japanese. Oh, I apologize sir. I didn't mean to be racist. Have a lovely afternoon."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"462"	" 6. Loopholes"	" six . Loopholes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"463"	" My mother used to tell me, I chose to have you because I wanted something to love and something that would love me unconditionally in return. And then I gave birth to the most selfish piece of shit on earth and all it ever did was cry and eat and shit and say me me me me me."	"My mother used to tell me, I chose to have you because I wanted something to love and something that would love me unconditionally in return. And then I gave birth to the most selfish piece of shit on earth and all it ever did was cry and eat and shit and say me me me me me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"465"	" I was hyperactive too. I craved constant stimulation and activity. When I walked down the sidewalk as a toddler, if you didn't have my arm in a death grip, I was off, running full speed toward the traffic. I loved to be chased. I thought it was a game."	"I was hyperactive too. I craved constant stimulation and activity. When I walked down the sidewalk as a toddler, if you didn't have my arm in a death grip, I was off, running full speed toward the traffic. I loved to be chased. I thought it was a game."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"466.01"	" The old grannies my mom hired to look after me while she was at work. I would leave them in tears."	"The old grannies my mom hired to look after me while she was at work. I would leave them in tears."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"466.02"	" My mom would come home and they'd be crying. I quit. I can't do this. Your son is a tyrant."	"My mom would come home and they'd be crying. I quit. I can't do this. Your son is a tyrant."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"466.03"	" It was the same with my school teachers."	"It was the same with my school teachers."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"466.05"	" If you weren't engaging me, you were in trouble. I wasn't a shit to people."	"If you weren't engaging me, you were in trouble. I wasn't a shit to people."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"466.06"	" I wasn't whiny and spoiled, I had good manners, I was just high energy and knew what I wanted to do."	"I wasn't whiny and spoiled, I had good manners, I was just high energy and knew what I wanted to do."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"466"	" The old grannies my mom hired to look after me while she was at work. I would leave them in tears. My mom would come home and they'd be crying. I quit. I can't do this. Your son is a tyrant. It was the same with my school teachers. With Sunday school teachers. If you weren't engaging me, you were in trouble. I wasn't a shit to people. I wasn't whiny and spoiled. I had good manners. I was just high energy and knew what I wanted to do."	"The old grannies my mom hired to look after me while she was at work. I would leave them in tears. My mom would come home and they'd be crying. I quit. I can't do this. Your son is a tyrant. It was the same with my school teachers. With Sunday school teachers. If you weren't engaging me, you were in trouble. I wasn't a shit to people. I wasn't whiny and spoiled. I had good manners. I was just high energy and knew what I wanted to do."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"467"	" My mom used to take me to the park so she could run me to death and burn off the energy. She'd take a frisbee and throw it, and I'd run and catch it and bring it back. Over and over and over. Sometimes she'd throw a tennis ball. Black people's dogs don't play fetch. You don't throw anything to a black person's dog unless it's food. So it was only when I started spending time in parks with white people and their pets that I realized my mom was training me like a dog."	"My mom used to take me to the park so she could run me to death and burn off the energy. She'd take a frisbee and throw it, and I'd run and catch it and bring it back. Over and over and over. Sometimes she'd throw a tennis ball. Black people's dogs don't play fetch. You don't throw anything to a black person's dog unless it's food. So it was only when I started spending time in parks with white people and their pets that I realized my mom was training me like a dog."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"469"	" The two things I loved most were fire and knives. I was endlessly fascinated by them. Knives were just cool. I collected them from pawn shops and garage sales. Flick knives, butterfly knives, the Rambo knife, the Crocodile Dundee knife. Fire was the ultimate though. I loved fire, and I especially loved fireworks. We celebrated Guy Fawkes Day in November, and every year, my mom would buy us a ton of fireworks, like a mini arsenal."	"The two things I loved most were fire and knives. I was endlessly fascinated by them. Knives were just cool. I collected them from pawn shops and garage sales. Flick knives, butterfly knives, the Rambo knife, the Crocodile Dundee knife. Fire was the ultimate though. I loved fire, and I especially loved fireworks. We celebrated Guy Fawkes Day in November, and every year, my mom would buy us a ton of fireworks, like a mini arsenal."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"47"	" My mother is as stubborn as she is religious. Once her mind's made up, that's it. Indeed, obstacles that would normally lead a person to change their plans, like a car breaking down, only made her more determined to forge ahead."	"My mother is as stubborn as she is religious. Once her mind's made up, that's it. Indeed, obstacles that would normally lead a person to change their plans, like a car breaking down, only made her more determined to forge ahead."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"470"	" One afternoon I was doing precisely that, goofing around with my cousin and filling an empty plant pot with a huge pile of gunpowder when I got distracted by some black cat firecrackers. The cool thing you could do with a black cat was, instead of lighting it to make it explode, you could break it in half and light it and it would turn into a mini flamethrower. I stopped midway through building my gunpowder pile to play with the black cats and somehow dropped a match into the pile."	"One afternoon I was doing precisely that, goofing around with my cousin and filling an empty plant pot with a huge pile of gunpowder when I got distracted by some black cat firecrackers. The cool thing you could do with a black cat was, instead of lighting it to make it explode, you could break it in half and light it and it would turn into a mini flamethrower. I stopped midway through building my gunpowder pile to play with the black cats and somehow dropped a match into the pile."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"471"	" No, she shook her head. You know what? I would beat you, but Jesus has already exposed your lies."	"No, she shook her head. You know what? I would beat you, but Jesus has already exposed your lies."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"473"	" I went to the toilet and looked in the mirror."	"I went to the toilet and looked in the mirror."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"474"	" My eyebrows were gone and the front inch or so of my hair was completely burned off."	"My eyebrows were gone and the front inch or so of my hair was completely burned off."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"475"	" From an adult's point of view, I was destructive and out of control. But as a child, I didn't think of it that way. I never wanted to destroy. I wanted to create. I wasn't burning my eyebrows. I was creating fire. I wasn't breaking overhead projectors. I was creating chaos to see how people reacted. And I couldn't help it. There's a condition kids suffer from. A compulsive disorder that makes them do things they themselves don't understand. You can tell a child."	"From an adult's point of view, I was destructive and out of control. But as a child, I didn't think of it that way. I never wanted to destroy. I wanted to create. I wasn't burning my eyebrows. I was creating fire. I wasn't breaking overhead projectors. I was creating chaos to see how people reacted. And I couldn't help it. There's a condition kids suffer from. A compulsive disorder that makes them do things they themselves don't understand. You can tell a child."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"476"	" The child will look you dead in the eye and say, got it."	"The child will look you dead in the eye and say, got it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"478"	" My relationship with my mom was like the relationship between a cop and a criminal in the movies. The relentless detective and the devious mastermind she's determined to catch. They're bitter rivals, but damn, they respect the hell out of each other. And somehow, they even grow to like each other. Sometimes, my mom would catch me. But she was usually one step behind, and she was always giving me the eye."	"My relationship with my mom was like the relationship between a cop and a criminal in the movies. The relentless detective and the devious mastermind she's determined to catch. They're bitter rivals, but damn, they respect the hell out of each other. And somehow, they even grow to like each other. Sometimes, my mom would catch me. But she was usually one step behind, and she was always giving me the eye."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"479"	" Have a good evening, officer. That was my whole childhood."	"Have a good evening, officer. That was my whole childhood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"48"	" It's the devil, she said about the stalled car. The devil doesn't want us to go to church. That's why we've got to catch minibuses."	"It's the devil, she said about the stalled car. The devil doesn't want us to go to church. That's why we've got to catch minibuses."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"480"	" My mom was forever trying to rein me in. Over the years, her tactics grew more and more sophisticated. Where I had youth and energy on my side, she had cunning. And she figured out different ways to keep me in line."	"My mom was forever trying to rein me in. Over the years, her tactics grew more and more sophisticated. Where I had youth and energy on my side, she had cunning. And she figured out different ways to keep me in line."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"482"	" Finally, once we had our groceries and my mom was heading to the front to pay, I succeeded in wearing her down. Fine, she said. Go and get a toffee apple. I ran, got a toffee apple, came back and put it on the counter at checkout. Add this toffee apple, please, I said."	"Finally, once we had our groceries and my mom was heading to the front to pay, I succeeded in wearing her down. Fine, she said. Go and get a toffee apple. I ran, got a toffee apple, came back and put it on the counter at checkout. Add this toffee apple, please, I said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"483"	" The cashier looked at me skeptically. Wait your turn, boy. I'm still helping this lady. No, I said. She's buying it for me."	"The cashier looked at me skeptically. Wait your turn, boy. I'm still helping this lady. No, I said. She's buying it for me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"484"	" My mother turned to me."	"My mother turned to me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"485"	" Who's buying it for you? You're buying it for me. No, no. Why doesn't your mother buy it for you? What? My mother. You're my mother. I'm your mother? No, I'm not your mother. Where's your mother?"	"Who's buying it for you? You're buying it for me. No, no. Why doesn't your mother buy it for you? What? My mother. You're my mother. I'm your mother? No, I'm not your mother. Where's your mother?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"487"	" The cashier looked at her, looked back at me, looked at her again. She shrugged like, I have no idea what that kid's talking about. Then she looked at me like she'd never seen me before in her life. Are you lost, little boy? Where's your mother? Yeah, the cashier said. Where's your mother? I pointed at my mother. She's my mother. What? She can't be your mother, boy. She's black. Can't you see? My mom shook her head."	"The cashier looked at her, looked back at me, looked at her again. She shrugged like, I have no idea what that kid's talking about. Then she looked at me like she'd never seen me before in her life. Are you lost, little boy? Where's your mother? Yeah, the cashier said. Where's your mother? I pointed at my mother. She's my mother. What? She can't be your mother, boy. She's black. Can't you see? My mom shook her head."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"488"	" She shrugged again. So sad. I hope he finds his mother."	"She shrugged again. So sad. I hope he finds his mother."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"489"	" The cashier nodded. She paid him, took our groceries and walked out of the shop."	"The cashier nodded. She paid him, took our groceries and walked out of the shop."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"49"	" Whenever I found myself up against my mother's faith-based obstinacy, I would try, as respectfully as possible, to counter with an opposing point of view."	"Whenever I found myself up against my mother's faith based obstinacy, I would try, as respectfully as possible, to counter with an opposing point of view."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"491"	" By the time I was 7 or 8 I was too smart to be tricked so she changed tactics."	"By the time I was  seven  or  eight  I was too smart to be tricked so she changed tactics."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"492"	" Our life turned into a courtroom drama with two lawyers constantly debating over loopholes and technicalities. My mom was smart and had a sharp tongue, but I was quicker in an argument. She'd get flustered because she couldn't keep up. So she started writing me letters. That way, she could make her points and there could be no verbal sparring back and forth."	"Our life turned into a courtroom drama with two lawyers constantly debating over loopholes and technicalities. My mom was smart and had a sharp tongue, but I was quicker in an argument. She'd get flustered because she couldn't keep up. So she started writing me letters. That way, she could make her points and there could be no verbal sparring back and forth."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"493"	" If I had chose to do, I'd come home to find an envelope slipped under the door, like from the landlord."	"If I had chose to do, I'd come home to find an envelope slipped under the door, like from the landlord."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"494"	" Dear Trevor,"	"Dear Trevor,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"496"	" Colossians 3 verse 20."	"Colossians  three  verse  twenty ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"497"	" There are certain things I expect from you as my child and as a young man. You need to clean your room, you need to keep the house clean, you need to look after your school uniform. Please my child, I ask you, respect my rules so that I may also respect you. I ask you now, please go and do the dishes and do the weeds in the garden."	"There are certain things I expect from you as my child and as a young man. You need to clean your room, you need to keep the house clean, you need to look after your school uniform. Please my child, I ask you, respect my rules so that I may also respect you. I ask you now, please go and do the dishes and do the weeds in the garden."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"498"	" Yours sincerely, Mom."	"Yours sincerely, Mom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"499"	" I would do my chores. And if I had anything to say, I would write back."	"I would do my chores. And if I had anything to say, I would write back."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"50"	" Tsunkheila is a phrase with many shades of meaning. It says, don't undermine me, don't underestimate me, and just try me. It's a command and a threat all at once. It's a common thing for posse parents to say to their kids. Anytime I heard it, I knew it meant the conversation was over, and if I uttered another word, I was in for a hiding, what we call a spanking."	"Tsunkheila is a phrase with many shades of meaning. It says, don't undermine me, don't underestimate me, and just try me. It's a command and a threat all at once. It's a common thing for posse parents to say to their kids. Anytime I heard it, I knew it meant the conversation was over, and if I uttered another word, I was in for a hiding, what we call a spanking."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"500"	" Because my mom was a secretary and I spent hours at her office every day after school, I'd learned a great deal about business correspondence. I was extremely proud of my letter-writing abilities."	"Because my mom was a secretary and I spent hours at her office every day after school, I'd learned a great deal about business correspondence. I was extremely proud of my letter writing abilities."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"501"	" to whom it may concern."	"to whom it may concern."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"502"	" Dear Mom, I have received your correspondence earlier. I am delighted to say that I am ahead of schedule on the dishes and I will continue to wash them in an hour or so. Please note that the garden is wet and so I cannot do the weeds at this time. But please be assured this task will be completed by the end of the weekend. Also, I completely agree with what you are saying with regard to my respect levels and I will maintain my room"	"Dear Mom, I have received your correspondence earlier. I am delighted to say that I am ahead of schedule on the dishes and I will continue to wash them in an hour or so. Please note that the garden is wet and so I cannot do the weeds at this time. But please be assured this task will be completed by the end of the weekend. Also, I completely agree with what you are saying with regard to my respect levels and I will maintain my room."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"504"	" Dear Trevor, Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. The rod of discipline will remove it far from him."	"Dear Trevor, Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. The rod of discipline will remove it far from him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"505"	" Proverbs 22 verse 15."	"Proverbs  twenty two  verse  fifteen ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"506"	" Your school marks this term have been very disappointing, and your behaviour and class continues to be disruptive and disrespectful."	"Your school marks this term have been very disappointing, and your behaviour and class continues to be disruptive and disrespectful."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"507"	" It is clear from your actions that you do not respect me. You do not respect your teachers. Learn to respect the women in your life."	"It is clear from your actions that you do not respect me. You do not respect your teachers. Learn to respect the women in your life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"509"	" Because of your behavior, I am grounding you for one week. There will be no television and no video games. You're sincerely mom."	"Because of your behavior, I am grounding you for one week. There will be no television and no video games. You're sincerely mom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"51"	" At the time, I attended a private Catholic school called Maryvale College. I was the champion of the Maryvale Sports Day every single year. And my mother won the Moms Trophy every single year. Why? Because she was always chasing me to kick my ass. And I was always running not to get my ass kicked. Nobody ran like me and my mom. She wasn't one of those, come over here and get your hiding type moms. She delivered to you free of charge. She was a thrower too."	"At the time, I attended a private Catholic school called Maryvale College. I was the champion of the Maryvale Sports Day every single year. And my mother won the Moms Trophy every single year. Why? Because she was always chasing me to kick my ass. And I was always running not to get my ass kicked. Nobody ran like me and my mom. She wasn't one of those, come over here and get your hiding type moms. She delivered to you free of charge. She was a thrower too."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"510"	" I, of course, would find this punishment completely unfair. I'd take the letter and confront her. Can I speak to you about this?"	"I, of course, would find this punishment completely unfair. I'd take the letter and confront her. Can I speak to you about this?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"511"	" No. If you want to reply, you have to write a letter."	"No. If you want to reply, you have to write a letter."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"513"	" to whom it may concern."	"to whom it may concern."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"514"	" Dear mom, First of all, this has been a particularly tough time in school. And for you to say that my marks are bad is extremely unfair, especially considering the fact that you yourself were not very good in school and I am after all a product of yours. And so, in part, you are to blame because if you were not good in school, why would I be good in school? Because genetically, we are the same."	"Dear mom, First of all, this has been a particularly tough time in school. And for you to say that my marks are bad is extremely unfair, especially considering the fact that you yourself were not very good in school and I am after all a product of yours. And so, in part, you are to blame because if you were not good in school, why would I be good in school? Because genetically, we are the same."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"515"	" Gran always talks about how naughty you were, so obviously my notiness comes from you. So I don't think it is right or just for you to say any of this. Here's sincerely Trevor."	"Gran always talks about how naughty you were, so obviously my notiness comes from you. So I don't think it is right or just for you to say any of this. Here's sincerely Trevor."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"516"	" I'd bring her the letter and stand there while she read it. Invariably, she'd tear it up and throw it in the dustbin. Rubbish! This is rubbish! Then she'd start to launch into me and I'd say, I-I-I know! You have to write a letter."	"I'd bring her the letter and stand there while she read it. Invariably, she'd tear it up and throw it in the dustbin. Rubbish! This is rubbish! Then she'd start to launch into me and I'd say, I I I know! You have to write a letter."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"518"	" The letter writing was for minor disputes. For major infractions, my mom went with the ass-whipping."	"The letter writing was for minor disputes. For major infractions, my mom went with the ass whipping."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"519"	" Like most black South African parents, when it came to discipline, my mom was old school. If I pushed her too far, she'd go for the belt or switch. That's just how it was in those days. Pretty much all of my friends had it the same."	"Like most black South African parents, when it came to discipline, my mom was old school. If I pushed her too far, she'd go for the belt or switch. That's just how it was in those days. Pretty much all of my friends had it the same."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"52"	" We had a very Tom and Jerry relationship, me and my mom. She was the strict disciplinarian. I was naughty as shit. She would send me out to buy groceries, and I wouldn't come right home because I'd be using the change from the milk and bread to play arcade games at the supermarket. I loved video games. I was a master at Street Fighter. I could go forever on a single play. I'd drop a coin in, time would fly, and the next thing I knew, there'd be a woman behind me with a"	"We had a very Tom and Jerry relationship, me and my mom. She was the strict disciplinarian. I was naughty as shit. She would send me out to buy groceries, and I wouldn't come right home because I'd be using the change from the milk and bread to play arcade games at the supermarket. I loved video games. I was a master at Street Fighter. I could go forever on a single play. I'd drop a coin in, time would fly, and the next thing I knew, there'd be a woman behind me with a."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"520"	" My mom would have given me proper sit-down hideings if I had given her the opportunity, but she could never catch me. My grand called me Springbok, after the second fastest land mammal on Earth, the deer that the cheetah hunts. My mom had to become a gorilla fighter. She got her licks in where she could, her belt or maybe a shoe administered on the fly."	"My mom would have given me proper sit down hideings if I had given her the opportunity, but she could never catch me. My grand called me Springbok, after the second fastest land mammal on Earth, the deer that the cheetah hunts. My mom had to become a gorilla fighter. She got her licks in where she could, her belt or maybe a shoe administered on the fly."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"522"	" My mom was on her own with a crazy child. I destroyed pianos. I shat on floors. I would screw up. She'd beat the shit out of me and give me time to cry. And then she'd pop back into my room with a big smile and go, Are you ready for dinner? We need to hurry and eat if we want to watch Rescue 911. Are you coming? What? What kind of psychopath are you? You just beat me!"	"My mom was on her own with a crazy child. I destroyed pianos. I shat on floors. I would screw up. She'd beat the shit out of me and give me time to cry. And then she'd pop back into my room with a big smile and go, Are you ready for dinner? We need to hurry and eat if we want to watch Rescue  nine hundred and eleven . Are you coming? What? What kind of psychopath are you? You just beat me!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"523"	" Yes, because you did something wrong. It doesn't mean I don't love you anymore. What? Look, did you or did you not do something wrong?"	"Yes, because you did something wrong. It doesn't mean I don't love you anymore. What? Look, did you or did you not do something wrong?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"524"	" I did."	"I did."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"525"	" And then, I hit you. And now that's over. So why sit there and cry? It's time for Rescue 911. William Shatner is waiting. Are you coming or not?"	"And then, I hit you. And now that's over. So why sit there and cry? It's time for Rescue  nine hundred and eleven . William Shatner is waiting. Are you coming or not?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"527"	" For serious offenses, I'd get sent to the principal's office. Only the principal could give you an official hiding. You'd have to bend over, and he'd hit your ass with this flat rubber thing like the sole of a shoe."	"For serious offenses, I'd get sent to the principal's office. Only the principal could give you an official hiding. You'd have to bend over, and he'd hit your ass with this flat rubber thing like the sole of a shoe."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"528"	" Whenever the principal would hit me, it was like he was afraid to do it too hard. One day, I was getting a hiding and I thought, man, if only my mom hit me like this. And I started laughing. I couldn't help it. The principal was quite disturbed. If you're laughing while you're getting beaten, he said, then something is definitely wrong with you."	"Whenever the principal would hit me, it was like he was afraid to do it too hard. One day, I was getting a hiding and I thought, man, if only my mom hit me like this. And I started laughing. I couldn't help it. The principal was quite disturbed. If you're laughing while you're getting beaten, he said, then something is definitely wrong with you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"529"	" That was the first of three times the school made my mom take me to a psychologist to be evaluated."	"That was the first of three times the school made my mom take me to a psychologist to be evaluated."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"53"	" When I was little, she always caught me. But as I got older, I got faster. And when speed failed her, she'd use her wits. If I was about to get away, she'd yell, stop! Thief! She'd do this to her own child. In South Africa, nobody gets involved in other people's business, unless it's mob justice. And then everybody wants in. So she'd yell, thief! Knowing it would bring the whole neighborhood out against me. And then,"	"When I was little, she always caught me. But as I got older, I got faster. And when speed failed her, she'd use her wits. If I was about to get away, she'd yell, stop! Thief! She'd do this to her own child. In South Africa, nobody gets involved in other people's business, unless it's mob justice. And then everybody wants in. So she'd yell, thief! Knowing it would bring the whole neighborhood out against me. And then,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"531"	" I wasn't ADD, I wasn't a sociopath, I was just creative and independent and full of energy. The therapists did give me a series of tests, and they came to the conclusion that I was either going to make an excellent criminal or be very good at catching criminals, because I could always find loopholes in the law. Whenever I thought a rule wasn't logical, I'd find my way around it."	"I wasn't ADD, I wasn't a sociopath, I was just creative and independent and full of energy. The therapists did give me a series of tests, and they came to the conclusion that I was either going to make an excellent criminal or be very good at catching criminals, because I could always find loopholes in the law. Whenever I thought a rule wasn't logical, I'd find my way around it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"532"	" The rules about communion at Friday Mass, for example, made absolutely no sense. We'd be in there for an hour, kneeling, standing, sitting, kneeling, standing, sitting, kneeling, standing, sitting, and by the end of it, I'd be starving. But I was never allowed to take communion because I wasn't Catholic. The other kids could eat Jesus' body and drink Jesus' blood. But I couldn't. And Jesus' blood was grape juice. I loved grape juice. Grape juice and crackers."	"The rules about communion at Friday Mass, for example, made absolutely no sense. We'd be in there for an hour, kneeling, standing, sitting, kneeling, standing, sitting, kneeling, standing, sitting, and by the end of it, I'd be starving. But I was never allowed to take communion because I wasn't Catholic. The other kids could eat Jesus' body and drink Jesus' blood. But I couldn't. And Jesus' blood was grape juice. I loved grape juice. Grape juice and crackers."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"533"	" Only Catholics can eat Jesus' body and drink Jesus' blood, right? Yes. But Jesus wasn't Catholic. No."	"Only Catholics can eat Jesus' body and drink Jesus' blood, right? Yes. But Jesus wasn't Catholic. No."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"534"	" Jesus was Jewish. Well, yes. So you're telling me that if Jesus walked into your church right now, Jesus would not be allowed to have the body and the blood of Jesus? Well, um...um..."	"Jesus was Jewish. Well, yes. So you're telling me that if Jesus walked into your church right now, Jesus would not be allowed to have the body and the blood of Jesus? Well, um...um..."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"536"	" One morning before Mass, I decided, I'm going to get me some Jesus blood and Jesus body."	"One morning before Mass, I decided, I'm going to get me some Jesus blood and Jesus body."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"537"	" I snuck up behind the altar and I drank the entire bottle of grape juice and I ate the entire bag of Eucharist to make up for all the other times that I couldn't."	"I snuck up behind the altar and I drank the entire bottle of grape juice and I ate the entire bag of Eucharist to make up for all the other times that I couldn't."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"538"	" In my mind I wasn't breaking the rules, because the rules didn't make any sense. And I got caught, only because they broke their own rules. Another kid ratted me out in confession, and the priest turned me in."	"In my mind I wasn't breaking the rules, because the rules didn't make any sense. And I got caught, only because they broke their own rules. Another kid ratted me out in confession, and the priest turned me in."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"539"	" No, no, I protested. You've broken the rules. That's confidential information. The priest isn't supposed to repeat what you say in confession."	"No, no, I protested. You've broken the rules. That's confidential information. The priest isn't supposed to repeat what you say in confession."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"540"	" They didn't care. The school could break whatever rules it wanted. The principle laid into me. What kind of a sick person would eat all of Jesus' body and drink all of Jesus' blood?"	"They didn't care. The school could break whatever rules it wanted. The principle laid into me. What kind of a sick person would eat all of Jesus' body and drink all of Jesus' blood?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"541"	" Hungry person."	"Hungry person."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"542"	" I got another hiding and a second trip to the psychologist for that one."	"I got another hiding and a second trip to the psychologist for that one."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"543"	" The third visit to the shrink and the last straw came in grade six."	"The third visit to the shrink and the last straw came in grade six."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"545"	" Funnily enough, I didn't get into trouble with my mom when it happened. There was no ass-whipping waiting for me at home. She'd lost the bursary when she'd left her job at ICI and paying for private school was becoming a burden. But more than that, she thought the school was overreacting."	"Funnily enough, I didn't get into trouble with my mom when it happened. There was no ass whipping waiting for me at home. She'd lost the bursary when she'd left her job at ICI and paying for private school was becoming a burden. But more than that, she thought the school was overreacting."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"546"	" The truth is, she probably took my side against Maryville more often than not. She agreed with me 100% about the Eucharist thing."	"The truth is, she probably took my side against Maryville more often than not. She agreed with me  one hundred  percent  about the Eucharist thing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"547"	" Let me get this straight, she told the principal. You're punishing a child because he wants Jesus' body and Jesus' blood. Why shouldn't he have those things? Of course he should have them."	"Let me get this straight, she told the principal. You're punishing a child because he wants Jesus' body and Jesus' blood. Why shouldn't he have those things? Of course he should have them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"548"	" When they made me see a therapist for laughing while the principal hit me, she told the school that was ridiculous too."	"When they made me see a therapist for laughing while the principal hit me, she told the school that was ridiculous too."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"55"	" I was five years old, nearly six, when Nelson Mandela was released from prison. I remember seeing it on TV and everyone being happy. I didn't know why we were happy, just that we were."	"I was five years old, nearly six, when Nelson Mandela was released from prison. I remember seeing it on TV and everyone being happy. I didn't know why we were happy, just that we were."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"550"	" Well clearly you don't know how to hit a kid. That's your problem, not mine. Travers never laughed when I've hit him, I can tell you."	"Well clearly you don't know how to hit a kid. That's your problem, not mine. Travers never laughed when I've hit him, I can tell you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"551"	" That was the weird and kind of amazing thing about my mom. If she agreed with me that a rule was stupid, she wouldn't punish me for breaking it. Both she and the psychologists agreed that the school was the one with the problem, not me. Catholic school is not the place to be creative and independent."	"That was the weird and kind of amazing thing about my mom. If she agreed with me that a rule was stupid, she wouldn't punish me for breaking it. Both she and the psychologists agreed that the school was the one with the problem, not me. Catholic school is not the place to be creative and independent."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"552"	" Catholic school is similar to apartheid in that it's ruthlessly authoritarian and its authority rests on a bunch of rules that don't make any sense. My mother grew up with these rules and she questioned them. When they didn't hold up, she simply went around them."	"Catholic school is similar to apartheid in that it's ruthlessly authoritarian and its authority rests on a bunch of rules that don't make any sense. My mother grew up with these rules and she questioned them. When they didn't hold up, she simply went around them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"554"	" When I was seven years old, my mother had been dating her new boyfriend, Abel, for a year maybe. But at that point, I was too young to know who they were to each other. It was just, hey, that's mom's friend who's around a lot. I liked Abel. He was a really nice guy."	"When I was seven years old, my mother had been dating her new boyfriend, Abel, for a year maybe. But at that point, I was too young to know who they were to each other. It was just, hey, that's mom's friend who's around a lot. I liked Abel. He was a really nice guy."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"555"	" As a black person back then, if you wanted to live in the suburbs, you'd have to find a white family renting out their servants' quarters, or sometimes their garage, which was what Abel had done."	"As a black person back then, if you wanted to live in the suburbs, you'd have to find a white family renting out their servants' quarters, or sometimes their garage, which was what Abel had done."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"556"	" He lived in a neighborhood called Orange Grove, in a white family's garage, which he'd turned into a cottage type thing with a hot plate and a bed."	"He lived in a neighborhood called Orange Grove, in a white family's garage, which he'd turned into a cottage type thing with a hot plate and a bed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"557"	" Sometimes he'd come sleep at our house and sometimes we'd go stay with him. Staying in a garage when we owned our own house wasn't ideal. But Orange Grove was close to my school and my mom's work, so it had its benefits."	"Sometimes he'd come sleep at our house and sometimes we'd go stay with him. Staying in a garage when we owned our own house wasn't ideal. But Orange Grove was close to my school and my mom's work, so it had its benefits."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"559"	" At that age, my love of fire was in full bloom."	"At that age, my love of fire was in full bloom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"56"	" I was aware of the fact that there was a thing called apartheid and it was ending and that was a big deal, but I didn't understand the intricacies of it."	"I was aware of the fact that there was a thing called apartheid and it was ending and that was a big deal, but I didn't understand the intricacies of it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"560"	" One afternoon, everyone was at work, my mom and Abel and both of the white parents, and the kid and I were playing together while his mom was inside the house cleaning."	"One afternoon, everyone was at work, my mom and Abel and both of the white parents, and the kid and I were playing together while his mom was inside the house cleaning."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"561"	" One thing I loved doing at the time was using a magnifying glass to burn my name into pieces of wood."	"One thing I loved doing at the time was using a magnifying glass to burn my name into pieces of wood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"563"	" That afternoon, I was teaching this kid how to do it. We were inside the servants' quarters, which was rarely more of a tool shed added onto the back of the house, full of wooden ladders, buckets of old paint, turpentine. I had a box of matches with me too, all my usual firemaking tools."	"That afternoon, I was teaching this kid how to do it. We were inside the servants' quarters, which was rarely more of a tool shed added onto the back of the house, full of wooden ladders, buckets of old paint, turpentine. I had a box of matches with me too, all my usual firemaking tools."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"564"	" We were sitting on an old mattress that they used to sleep on the floor, basically a sack stuffed with dried straw. The sun was beaming in through the window, and I was showing the kid how to burn his name into a piece of plywood."	"We were sitting on an old mattress that they used to sleep on the floor, basically a sack stuffed with dried straw. The sun was beaming in through the window, and I was showing the kid how to burn his name into a piece of plywood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"565"	" At one point, we took a break to go get a snack."	"At one point, we took a break to go get a snack."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"566"	" I set the magnifying glass and the matches on the mattress and we left."	"I set the magnifying glass and the matches on the mattress and we left."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"568"	" After a while, I noticed smoke coming out of the cracks in the window frame. I ran over and looked inside. A small fire was burning in the middle of the straw mattress where we'd left the matches and the magnifying glass. We ran and called the maid. She came but didn't know what to do. The door was locked. And before we could figure out how to get into the shed, the whole thing caught. The mattress, the ladders, the paint, the turpentine, everything. The flames moved quickly. Soon,"	"After a while, I noticed smoke coming out of the cracks in the window frame. I ran over and looked inside. A small fire was burning in the middle of the straw mattress where we'd left the matches and the magnifying glass. We ran and called the maid. She came but didn't know what to do. The door was locked. And before we could figure out how to get into the shed, the whole thing caught. The mattress, the ladders, the paint, the turpentine, everything. The flames moved quickly. Soon,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"569"	" The White family came home and stood on the streets, staring at the ruins of their house."	"The White family came home and stood on the streets, staring at the ruins of their house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"57"	" What I do remember, what I will never forget, is the violence that followed."	"What I do remember, what I will never forget, is the violence that followed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"570"	" They asked the maid what happened, and she asked her son, and the kid totally snitched. Trevor had matches, he said."	"They asked the maid what happened, and she asked her son, and the kid totally snitched. Trevor had matches, he said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"572"	" I don't think they knew what to say. They were completely dumbfounded."	"I don't think they knew what to say. They were completely dumbfounded."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"573"	" They didn't call the police, didn't threaten to sue. What were they going to do? Arrest a seven-year-old for arson? And we were so poor you couldn't actually sue us for anything. Plus, they had insurance. So that was the end of it."	"They didn't call the police, didn't threaten to sue. What were they going to do? Arrest a seven year old for arson? And we were so poor you couldn't actually sue us for anything. Plus, they had insurance. So that was the end of it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"574"	" They kicked Abel out of the garage, which I thought was hilarious because the garage, which was freestanding, was the only piece of the property left unscathed. I saw no reason for Abel to have to leave, but they made him."	"They kicked Abel out of the garage, which I thought was hilarious because the garage, which was freestanding, was the only piece of the property left unscathed. I saw no reason for Abel to have to leave, but they made him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"575"	" We packed up his stuff, put it into our car, and drove home to Eden Park."	"We packed up his stuff, put it into our car, and drove home to Eden Park."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"577"	" There's naughty, and then there's burning down a white person's house. She didn't know what to do."	"There's naughty, and then there's burning down a white person's house. She didn't know what to do."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"578"	" I didn't feel bad about it at all. I still don't. The lawyer in me maintains that I'm completely innocent. There were matches, and there was a magnifying glass, and there was a mattress, and then clearly a series of unfortunate events. Things catch fire sometimes. That's why there's a fire brigade. But everyone in my family will tell you, Trevor burned down a house."	"I didn't feel bad about it at all. I still don't. The lawyer in me maintains that I'm completely innocent. There were matches, and there was a magnifying glass, and there was a mattress, and then clearly a series of unfortunate events. Things catch fire sometimes. That's why there's a fire brigade. But everyone in my family will tell you, Trevor burned down a house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"579"	" If people thought I was naughty before, after the fire, I was notorious. One of my uncles stopped calling me Trevor. He called me Terra instead. Don't leave that kid alone in your home, he'd say. He'll burn it to the ground."	"If people thought I was naughty before, after the fire, I was notorious. One of my uncles stopped calling me Trevor. He called me Terra instead. Don't leave that kid alone in your home, he'd say. He'll burn it to the ground."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"58"	" The triumph of democracy over apartheid is sometimes called the bloodless revolution. It is called that because very little white blood was spilled. Black blood ran in the streets."	"The triumph of democracy over apartheid is sometimes called the bloodless revolution. It is called that because very little white blood was spilled. Black blood ran in the streets."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"581"	" how I withstood the number of hideings that I got. Why did I keep misbehaving? How did I never learn my lesson?"	"how I withstood the number of hideings that I got. Why did I keep misbehaving? How did I never learn my lesson?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"582"	" Both of my cousins were super good kids. Mlungisi got maybe one hiding in his life. After that, he said he never wanted to experience anything like it ever again, and from that day, he always followed the rules. But I was blessed with another trait I inherited from my mother. Her ability to forget the pain in life."	"Both of my cousins were super good kids. Mlungisi got maybe one hiding in his life. After that, he said he never wanted to experience anything like it ever again, and from that day, he always followed the rules. But I was blessed with another trait I inherited from my mother. Her ability to forget the pain in life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"583"	" I remember the thing that caused the trauma, but I don't hold on to the trauma. I never let the memory of something painful prevent me from trying something new."	"I remember the thing that caused the trauma, but I don't hold on to the trauma. I never let the memory of something painful prevent me from trying something new."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"584"	" If you think too much about the ass-kicking your mom gave you, or the ass-kicking that life gave you, you'll stop pushing the boundaries and breaking the rules. It's better to take it, spend some time crying, then wake up the next day and move on. You'll have a few bruises, and they'll remind you of what happened, and that's okay. But after a while, the bruises fade, and they fade for a reason. Because now, it's time to get up to some shit again."	"If you think too much about the ass kicking your mom gave you, or the ass kicking that life gave you, you'll stop pushing the boundaries and breaking the rules. It's better to take it, spend some time crying, then wake up the next day and move on. You'll have a few bruises, and they'll remind you of what happened, and that's okay. But after a while, the bruises fade, and they fade for a reason. Because now, it's time to get up to some shit again."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"586"	" I've traveled to other black cities and black countries all over the black continent. And in all of that time, I've yet to find a place where black people like cats. One of the biggest reasons for that, as we know in South Africa, is that only witches have cats. And all cats are witches."	"I've traveled to other black cities and black countries all over the black continent. And in all of that time, I've yet to find a place where black people like cats. One of the biggest reasons for that, as we know in South Africa, is that only witches have cats. And all cats are witches."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"587"	" There was a famous incident during an Orlando Pirates soccer match a few years ago."	"There was a famous incident during an Orlando Pirates soccer match a few years ago."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"588"	" A cat got into the stadium and ran through the crowd and out onto the pitch in the middle of the game. A security guard, seeing the cat, did what any sensible black person would do. He said to himself, that cat is a witch. He caught the cat and live on TV he kicked it and stomped it and beat it to death with a shambok. A hard leather whip."	"A cat got into the stadium and ran through the crowd and out onto the pitch in the middle of the game. A security guard, seeing the cat, did what any sensible black person would do. He said to himself, that cat is a witch. He caught the cat and live on TV he kicked it and stomped it and beat it to death with a shambok. A hard leather whip."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"589"	" It was front page news all over the country. White people lost their shit. Oh my word, it was insane. The security guard was arrested and put on trial and found guilty of animal abuse. He had to pay some enormous fine to avoid spending several months in jail. What was ironic to me was that white people had spent years seeing video of black people being beaten to death by other white people. But this one video of a black man kicking a cat, that's what sent them over the edge."	"It was front page news all over the country. White people lost their shit. Oh my word, it was insane. The security guard was arrested and put on trial and found guilty of animal abuse. He had to pay some enormous fine to avoid spending several months in jail. What was ironic to me was that white people had spent years seeing video of black people being beaten to death by other white people. But this one video of a black man kicking a cat, that's what sent them over the edge."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"590"	" In South Africa, black people have dogs."	"In South Africa, black people have dogs."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"591"	" 7. Fuffi"	" seven . Fuffi."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"592"	" A month after we moved to Eden Park, my mother brought home two cats. Black cats. Beautiful creatures."	"A month after we moved to Eden Park, my mother brought home two cats. Black cats. Beautiful creatures."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"593"	" Some woman from her work had a litter of kittens she was trying to get rid of, and my mom ended up with two. I was excited because I'd never had a pet before. My mom was excited because she loves animals. She didn't believe in any nonsense about cats. It was just another way in which she was a rebel, refusing to conform to ideas about what black people did and didn't do."	"Some woman from her work had a litter of kittens she was trying to get rid of, and my mom ended up with two. I was excited because I'd never had a pet before. My mom was excited because she loves animals. She didn't believe in any nonsense about cats. It was just another way in which she was a rebel, refusing to conform to ideas about what black people did and didn't do."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"595"	" Since we'd moved to a colored neighborhood, my mom thought the cats would be okay. Once they were grown, we let them out during the day to roam the neighborhood."	"Since we'd moved to a colored neighborhood, my mom thought the cats would be okay. Once they were grown, we let them out during the day to roam the neighborhood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"596"	" Then we came home one evening and found the cats strung up by their tails from our front gate, gutted and skinned and bleeding out. Their heads chopped off. On our front wall, someone had written in Afrikaans, Hex, Witch."	"Then we came home one evening and found the cats strung up by their tails from our front gate, gutted and skinned and bleeding out. Their heads chopped off. On our front wall, someone had written in Afrikaans, Hex, Witch."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"597"	" Colored people apparently were no more progressive than black people on the issue of cats."	"Colored people apparently were no more progressive than black people on the issue of cats."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"598"	" I wasn't exactly devastated about the cats. I don't think we'd had them long enough for me to get attached. I don't even remember their names. And cats are dicks for the most part. As much as I tried, they never felt like real pets. They never showed me affection, nor did they accept any of mine. Had the cats made more of an effort, I might have felt like I had lost something. But even as a kid, looking at these dead mutilated animals, I was like, well, there you have it. Maybe if they'd been nicer, they could have avoided this."	"I wasn't exactly devastated about the cats. I don't think we'd had them long enough for me to get attached. I don't even remember their names. And cats are dicks for the most part. As much as I tried, they never felt like real pets. They never showed me affection, nor did they accept any of mine. Had the cats made more of an effort, I might have felt like I had lost something. But even as a kid, looking at these dead mutilated animals, I was like, well, there you have it. Maybe if they'd been nicer, they could have avoided this."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"6"	" Any native female who permits any European male to have illicit carnal intercourse with her, and any European female who permits any native male to have illicit carnal intercourse with her, shall be guilty of an offence and liable on conviction to imprisonment for a period not exceeding four years. "	"Any native female who permits any European male to have illicit carnal intercourse with her, and any European female who permits any native male to have illicit carnal intercourse with her, shall be guilty of an offence and liable on conviction to imprisonment for a period not exceeding four years."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"60"	" The political dynamic between these two groups was very complicated, but the simplest way to understand it is as a proxy war between Zulu and Khosa. The Inkata was predominantly Zulu, very militant and very nationalistic. The ANC was a broad coalition encompassing many different tribes, but its leaders at the time were primarily Khosa. Instead of uniting for peace, they turned on one another, committing acts of unbelievable savagery."	"The political dynamic between these two groups was very complicated, but the simplest way to understand it is as a proxy war between Zulu and Khosa. The Inkata was predominantly Zulu, very militant and very nationalistic. The ANC was a broad coalition encompassing many different tribes, but its leaders at the time were primarily Khosa. Instead of uniting for peace, they turned on one another, committing acts of unbelievable savagery."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"600"	" Then we got dogs. Dogs are cool. Almost every black family I knew had a dog. No matter how poor you were, you had a dog."	"Then we got dogs. Dogs are cool. Almost every black family I knew had a dog. No matter how poor you were, you had a dog."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"601"	" White people treat dogs like children or members of the family. Black people's dogs are more for protection, a poor man's alarm system. You buy a dog and you keep it out in the yard. Black people name dogs by their traits. If it has stripes, you call it tiger. If it's vicious, you call it danger. If it has spots, you call it spotty."	"White people treat dogs like children or members of the family. Black people's dogs are more for protection, a poor man's alarm system. You buy a dog and you keep it out in the yard. Black people name dogs by their traits. If it has stripes, you call it tiger. If it's vicious, you call it danger. If it has spots, you call it spotty."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"603"	" We never had dogs in Soweto. Then one day, some lady at my mom's work offered us two puppies. They weren't planned puppies. This woman's Maltese poodle had been impregnated by the bull terrier from next door. A strange mix. My mom said she'd take them both. She brought them home, and I was the happiest kid on earth."	"We never had dogs in Soweto. Then one day, some lady at my mom's work offered us two puppies. They weren't planned puppies. This woman's Maltese poodle had been impregnated by the bull terrier from next door. A strange mix. My mom said she'd take them both. She brought them home, and I was the happiest kid on earth."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"604"	" My mom named them Fuffi and Panther."	"My mom named them Fuffi and Panther."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"605"	" Fuffie, I don't know where her name came from. Panther had a pink nose. So she was Pink Panther and eventually just Panther. They were two sisters who loved and hated each other. They would look out for each other, but they would also fight all the time. Like blood fights, biting, clawing. It was a strange gruesome relationship."	"Fuffie, I don't know where her name came from. Panther had a pink nose. So she was Pink Panther and eventually just Panther. They were two sisters who loved and hated each other. They would look out for each other, but they would also fight all the time. Like blood fights, biting, clawing. It was a strange gruesome relationship."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"606"	" Panther was my mom's dog. Fuffi was mine. Fuffi was beautiful, clean lines, happy face. She looked like a perfect bull terrier, only skinnier because of the Maltese mixed in. Panther, who was more half and half, came out weird and scruffy looking. Panther was smart. Fuffi was dumb as shit. At least, we always thought she was dumb as shit. Whenever we called them, Panther would come right away. But Fuffi wouldn't do anything. Panther would run back and get Fuffi,"	"Panther was my mom's dog. Fuffi was mine. Fuffi was beautiful, clean lines, happy face. She looked like a perfect bull terrier, only skinnier because of the Maltese mixed in. Panther, who was more half and half, came out weird and scruffy looking. Panther was smart. Fuffi was dumb as shit. At least, we always thought she was dumb as shit. Whenever we called them, Panther would come right away. But Fuffi wouldn't do anything. Panther would run back and get Fuffi,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"608"	" It must have been strange for your family living with a dog that was deaf, he said. What? You didn't know your dog was deaf? No. We thought it was stupid."	"It must have been strange for your family living with a dog that was deaf, he said. What? You didn't know your dog was deaf? No. We thought it was stupid."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"609"	" That's when we realized that their whole lives, the one dog had been telling the other dog what to do somehow. The smart hearing one was helping the dumb deaf one."	"That's when we realized that their whole lives, the one dog had been telling the other dog what to do somehow. The smart hearing one was helping the dumb deaf one."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"61"	" I saw one of those charred bodies on the side of the road one day on my way to school. In the evenings, my mom and I would turn on our little black and white TV and watch the news. A dozen people killed. Fifty people killed. A hundred people killed."	"I saw one of those charred bodies on the side of the road one day on my way to school. In the evenings, my mom and I would turn on our little black and white TV and watch the news. A dozen people killed. Fifty people killed. A hundred people killed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"610"	" Fuffie was the love of my life. Beautiful but stupid. I raised her. I potty trained her. She slept in my bed. A dog is a great thing for a kid to have. It's like a bicycle but with emotions."	"Fuffie was the love of my life. Beautiful but stupid. I raised her. I potty trained her. She slept in my bed. A dog is a great thing for a kid to have. It's like a bicycle but with emotions."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"612"	" It never occurred to us that she could actually scale a five foot wall, but that was exactly what was happening."	"It never occurred to us that she could actually scale a five foot wall, but that was exactly what was happening."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"613"	" Every morning, Fufi would wait for us to leave, jump over the wall and go roaming around the neighborhood."	"Every morning, Fufi would wait for us to leave, jump over the wall and go roaming around the neighborhood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"614"	" I caught her one day when I was home for the school holidays."	"I caught her one day when I was home for the school holidays."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"615"	" My mom had left for work and I was in the living room. Fufi didn't know I was there. She thought I was gone because the car was gone. I heard Panther barking in the backyard, looked out and there was Fufi, scaling the wall. She jumped, scampered up the last couple of feet and then she was gone."	"My mom had left for work and I was in the living room. Fufi didn't know I was there. She thought I was gone because the car was gone. I heard Panther barking in the backyard, looked out and there was Fufi, scaling the wall. She jumped, scampered up the last couple of feet and then she was gone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"617"	" She went a long way, many streets over to another part of the neighborhood. Then she went up to this other house and jumped over their wall and into their backyard. What the hell was she doing? I went up to the gates and rang the doorbell."	"She went a long way, many streets over to another part of the neighborhood. Then she went up to this other house and jumped over their wall and into their backyard. What the hell was she doing? I went up to the gates and rang the doorbell."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"618"	" This colored kid answered."	"This colored kid answered."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"619"	" May I help you? he said."	"May I help you? he said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"62"	" Eden Park sat not far from the sprawling townships of the East Rand, Tokoza and Katlehong, which were the sites of some of the most horrific Inkata ANC clashes. Once a month at least, we'd drive home and the neighborhood would be on fire."	"Eden Park sat not far from the sprawling townships of the East Rand, Tokoza and Katlehong, which were the sites of some of the most horrific Inkata ANC clashes. Once a month at least, we'd drive home and the neighborhood would be on fire."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"621"	" What? My dog, she's in your yard."	"What? My dog, she's in your yard."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"622"	" Fufi walked up and stood between us."	"Fufi walked up and stood between us."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"623"	" Fuffie, come! I said. Let's go! The kid looked at Fuffie and called her by some other stupid name, Spotty or some bullshit like that. Spotty, go back inside the house. Whoa, whoa! I said. Spotty, that's Fuffie! No, that's my dog, Spotty. No, that's Fuffie, my friend. No, this is Spotty. How could this be Spotty? She doesn't even have spots! You don't know what you're talking about!"	"Fuffie, come! I said. Let's go! The kid looked at Fuffie and called her by some other stupid name, Spotty or some bullshit like that. Spotty, go back inside the house. Whoa, whoa! I said. Spotty, that's Fuffie! No, that's my dog, Spotty. No, that's Fuffie, my friend. No, this is Spotty. How could this be Spotty? She doesn't even have spots! You don't know what you're talking about!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"624"	" Then he went into the house and got his mom and she came out. What do you want? She said. That's my dog. This is our dog. Go away."	"Then he went into the house and got his mom and she came out. What do you want? She said. That's my dog. This is our dog. Go away."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"626"	" Fufi was deaf to my pleas. And everything else."	"Fufi was deaf to my pleas. And everything else."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"627"	" I jumped onto my bike and raced home, tears running down my face. I loved Fuffi so much. To see her with another boy, acting like she didn't know me, after I raised her, after all the nights we spent together, I was heartbroken."	"I jumped onto my bike and raced home, tears running down my face. I loved Fuffi so much. To see her with another boy, acting like she didn't know me, after I raised her, after all the nights we spent together, I was heartbroken."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"628"	" That evening, Fuffie didn't come home."	"That evening, Fuffie didn't come home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"629"	" Because the other family thought I was coming to steal their dog, they had decided to lock her inside so she couldn't make it back the way she normally did to wait for us outside the fence. My mom got home from work."	"Because the other family thought I was coming to steal their dog, they had decided to lock her inside so she couldn't make it back the way she normally did to wait for us outside the fence. My mom got home from work."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"630"	" I was in tears. I told her Fuffie had been kidnapped."	"I was in tears. I told her Fuffie had been kidnapped."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"631"	" We went back to the house. My mom rang the bell and confronted the mom. Look, this is our dog."	"We went back to the house. My mom rang the bell and confronted the mom. Look, this is our dog."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"632"	" This lady lied to my mom's face. This is not your dog. We bought this dog."	"This lady lied to my mom's face. This is not your dog. We bought this dog."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"633"	" You didn't buy the dog. It's our dog."	"You didn't buy the dog. It's our dog."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"635"	" We gathered up our documentation and went back to the house. This time, we brought Panther with us as part of the proof."	"We gathered up our documentation and went back to the house. This time, we brought Panther with us as part of the proof."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"636"	" My mom showed this lady the pictures and the information from the vet. She still wouldn't give us Fuffi. My mom threatened to call the police. It turned into a whole thing. Finally, my mom said, okay, I'll give you a hundred rand. Fine, the lady said."	"My mom showed this lady the pictures and the information from the vet. She still wouldn't give us Fuffi. My mom threatened to call the police. It turned into a whole thing. Finally, my mom said, okay, I'll give you a hundred rand. Fine, the lady said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"637"	" My mom gave her some money and she brought Fuffi out. The other kid who thought Fuffi was spotty had to watch his mother sell the dog he thought was his. Now he started crying, spotty, no, mom, you can't sell spotty. I didn't care. I just wanted Fuffi back. Once Fuffi saw Panther, she came right away. The dogs left with us and we walked. I sobbed the whole way home, still heartbroken. My mom had no time for my whining. Why are you crying?"	"My mom gave her some money and she brought Fuffi out. The other kid who thought Fuffi was spotty had to watch his mother sell the dog he thought was his. Now he started crying, spotty, no, mom, you can't sell spotty. I didn't care. I just wanted Fuffi back. Once Fuffi saw Panther, she came right away. The dogs left with us and we walked. I sobbed the whole way home, still heartbroken. My mom had no time for my whining. Why are you crying?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"638"	" Fufi was my first heartbreak. No one has ever betrayed me more than Fufi. It was a valuable lesson to me. The hard thing was understanding that Fufi wasn't cheating on me with another boy. She was merely living her life to the fullest."	"Fufi was my first heartbreak. No one has ever betrayed me more than Fufi. It was a valuable lesson to me. The hard thing was understanding that Fufi wasn't cheating on me with another boy. She was merely living her life to the fullest."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"64"	" Whenever the riots broke out, all our neighbors would wisely hold up behind closed doors. But not my mom. She'd head straight out, and as we'd inch our way past the blockades, she'd give the rioters this look. Let me pass. I'm not involved in this shit. She was unwavering in the face of danger. That always amazed me. It didn't matter that there was a war on our doorstep. She had things to do, places to be. It was the same stubbornness that kept her going to church to spend"	"Whenever the riots broke out, all our neighbors would wisely hold up behind closed doors. But not my mom. She'd head straight out, and as we'd inch our way past the blockades, she'd give the rioters this look. Let me pass. I'm not involved in this shit. She was unwavering in the face of danger. That always amazed me. It didn't matter that there was a war on our doorstep. She had things to do, places to be. It was the same stubbornness that kept her going to church to spend."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"640"	" I believed that Fuffi was my dog. But of course that wasn't true. Fuffi was a dog. I was a boy. We got along well. She happened to live in my house."	"I believed that Fuffi was my dog. But of course that wasn't true. Fuffi was a dog. I was a boy. We got along well. She happened to live in my house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"641"	" That experience shaped what I felt about relationships for the rest of my life. You do not own the thing that you love. I was lucky to learn that lesson at such a young age. I have so many friends who still as adults wrestle with feelings of betrayal. They'll come to me angry and crying and talking about how they've been cheated on and lied to. And I feel for them. I understand what they're going through. I sit with them and buy them a drink and I say, friend, let me tell you the story of Fuffi."	"That experience shaped what I felt about relationships for the rest of my life. You do not own the thing that you love. I was lucky to learn that lesson at such a young age. I have so many friends who still as adults wrestle with feelings of betrayal. They'll come to me angry and crying and talking about how they've been cheated on and lied to. And I feel for them. I understand what they're going through. I sit with them and buy them a drink and I say, friend, let me tell you the story of Fuffi."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"642"	" When I was 24 years old, one day, out of the blue, my mother said to me, you need to find your father. Why? I asked. At that point, I hadn't seen him in over 10 years and didn't think I'd ever see him again. Because he's a piece of you, she said. And if you don't find him, you won't find yourself."	"When I was  twenty four  years old, one day, out of the blue, my mother said to me, you need to find your father. Why? I asked. At that point, I hadn't seen him in over  ten  years and didn't think I'd ever see him again. Because he's a piece of you, she said. And if you don't find him, you won't find yourself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"644"	" It's not about knowing who you are. It's about him knowing who you are and you knowing who he is. Too many men grow up without their fathers, so they spend their lives with a false impression of who their father is and what a father should be. You need to find your father. You need to show him what you've become. You need to finish that story."	"It's not about knowing who you are. It's about him knowing who you are and you knowing who he is. Too many men grow up without their fathers, so they spend their lives with a false impression of who their father is and what a father should be. You need to find your father. You need to show him what you've become. You need to finish that story."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"645"	" 8. Robert"	" eight . Robert."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"646"	" My father is a complete mystery. There are so many questions about his life that I still cannot even begin to answer."	"My father is a complete mystery. There are so many questions about his life that I still cannot even begin to answer."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"647"	" Where'd he grow up? Somewhere in Switzerland. Where'd he go to university? I don't know if he did. How'd he end up in South Africa? I haven't a clue."	"Where'd he grow up? Somewhere in Switzerland. Where'd he go to university? I don't know if he did. How'd he end up in South Africa? I haven't a clue."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"649"	" I know that he worked as a chef in Montreal and New York for a while before moving to South Africa in the late 1970s. I know that he worked for an industrial food service company and that he opened a couple of bars and restaurants here and there. That's about it."	"I know that he worked as a chef in Montreal and New York for a while before moving to South Africa in the late  one thousand, nine hundred and seventy s. I know that he worked for an industrial food service company and that he opened a couple of bars and restaurants here and there. That's about it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"65"	" But aren't you afraid, I'd say? There's only one of you, and there's so many of them."	"But aren't you afraid, I'd say? There's only one of you, and there's so many of them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"650"	" I never called my dad, Dad. I never addressed him, Daddy or Father, either. I couldn't. I was instructed not to. If we were out in public or anywhere people might overhear us and I called him Dad, someone might have asked questions or called the police. So for as long as I can remember, I always called him Robert."	"I never called my dad, Dad. I never addressed him, Daddy or Father, either. I couldn't. I was instructed not to. If we were out in public or anywhere people might overhear us and I called him Dad, someone might have asked questions or called the police. So for as long as I can remember, I always called him Robert."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"651"	" While I know nothing of my dad's life before me, thanks to my mom and just from the time I've been able to spend with him, I do have a sense of who he is as a person. He's very Swiss, clean and particular and precise. He's the only person I know who checks into a hotel room and leaves it cleaner than when he arrived. He doesn't like anyone waiting on him. No servants, no housekeepers. He cleans up after himself. He likes his space. He lives in his own world and does his own everything."	"While I know nothing of my dad's life before me, thanks to my mom and just from the time I've been able to spend with him, I do have a sense of who he is as a person. He's very Swiss, clean and particular and precise. He's the only person I know who checks into a hotel room and leaves it cleaner than when he arrived. He doesn't like anyone waiting on him. No servants, no housekeepers. He cleans up after himself. He likes his space. He lives in his own world and does his own everything."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"653"	" He used to say that most people marry because they want to control another person, and he never wanted to be controlled. I know that he loves traveling, loves entertaining, having people over. But at the same time, his privacy is everything to him."	"He used to say that most people marry because they want to control another person, and he never wanted to be controlled. I know that he loves traveling, loves entertaining, having people over. But at the same time, his privacy is everything to him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"654"	" Wherever he lives, he's never listed in the phone book."	"Wherever he lives, he's never listed in the phone book."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"655"	" I'm sure my parents would have been caught in their time together if he hadn't been as private as he is. My mom was wild and impulsive. My father was reserved and rational. She was fire, he was ice. They were opposites that attracted, and I'm a mix of them both."	"I'm sure my parents would have been caught in their time together if he hadn't been as private as he is. My mom was wild and impulsive. My father was reserved and rational. She was fire, he was ice. They were opposites that attracted, and I'm a mix of them both."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"656"	" One thing I do know about my dad is that he hates racism and homogeneity more than anything, and not because of any feelings of self-righteousness or moral superiority. He just never understood how white people could be racist in South Africa."	"One thing I do know about my dad is that he hates racism and homogeneity more than anything, and not because of any feelings of self righteousness or moral superiority. He just never understood how white people could be racist in South Africa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"658"	" In the early 80s, before I was born, he opened one of the first integrated restaurants in Johannesburg, a steakhouse. He applied for a special license that allowed businesses to serve both black and white patrons. These licenses existed because hotels and restaurants needed them to serve black travelers and diplomats from other countries who in theory weren't subject to the same restrictions as black South Africans. Black South Africans with money, in turn, exploited that loophole to frequent those"	"In the early  eighty s, before I was born, he opened one of the first integrated restaurants in Johannesburg, a steakhouse. He applied for a special license that allowed businesses to serve both black and white patrons. These licenses existed because hotels and restaurants needed them to serve black travelers and diplomats from other countries who in theory weren't subject to the same restrictions as black South Africans. Black South Africans with money, in turn, exploited that loophole to frequent those."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"659"	" My dad's restaurant was an instant booming success. Black people came there because there were few upscale establishments where they could eat, and they wanted to come and sit in a nice restaurant and see what that was like."	"My dad's restaurant was an instant booming success. Black people came there because there were few upscale establishments where they could eat, and they wanted to come and sit in a nice restaurant and see what that was like."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"66"	" Honey, I'm not alone, she'd say. I've got all of Heaven's angels behind me."	"Honey, I'm not alone, she'd say. I've got all of Heaven's angels behind me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"660"	" White people came because they wanted to see what it was like to sit with black people. The white people would sit and watch the black people eat, and the black people would sit and eat and watch the white people watching them eat. The curiosity of being together overwhelmed the animosity keeping people apart. The place had a great vibe."	"White people came because they wanted to see what it was like to sit with black people. The white people would sit and watch the black people eat, and the black people would sit and eat and watch the white people watching them eat. The curiosity of being together overwhelmed the animosity keeping people apart. The place had a great vibe."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"662"	" At first, the inspectors came and tried to get him on cleanliness and health code violations. Clearly, they had never heard of the Swiss. That failed dismally. Then, they decided to go after him by imposing additional and arbitrary restrictions."	"At first, the inspectors came and tried to get him on cleanliness and health code violations. Clearly, they had never heard of the Swiss. That failed dismally. Then, they decided to go after him by imposing additional and arbitrary restrictions."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"663"	" Since you've got the license, you can keep the restaurant open, they said. But you'll need to have separate toilets for every racial category. You'll need white toilets, black toilets, coloured toilets and Indian toilets. But then it will be a whole restaurant of nothing but toilets. Well, if you don't want to do that, your other option is to make it a normal restaurant and only serve whites."	"Since you've got the license, you can keep the restaurant open, they said. But you'll need to have separate toilets for every racial category. You'll need white toilets, black toilets, coloured toilets and Indian toilets. But then it will be a whole restaurant of nothing but toilets. Well, if you don't want to do that, your other option is to make it a normal restaurant and only serve whites."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"664"	" he closed the restaurant."	"he closed the restaurant."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"665"	" After apartheid fell, my father moved from Hillbrow to Yovil, a formerly quiet, residential neighborhood that had transformed into this vibrant melting pot of black and white and every other hue."	"After apartheid fell, my father moved from Hillbrow to Yovil, a formerly quiet, residential neighborhood that had transformed into this vibrant melting pot of black and white and every other hue."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"667"	" My dad lived two blocks over from Rocky, on Yoe Street, right next to this incredible park where I love to go because kids of all races and different countries were running around and playing there."	"My dad lived two blocks over from Rocky, on Yoe Street, right next to this incredible park where I love to go because kids of all races and different countries were running around and playing there."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"668"	" My dad's house was simple. Nice, but nothing fancy."	"My dad's house was simple. Nice, but nothing fancy."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"669"	" I feel like my dad had enough money to be comfortable and travel, but he never spent lavishly on things. He's extremely frugal, the kind of guy who drives the same car for twenty years."	"I feel like my dad had enough money to be comfortable and travel, but he never spent lavishly on things. He's extremely frugal, the kind of guy who drives the same car for twenty years."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"67"	" Well, it would be nice if we could see them, I'd say. Because I don't think the rioters know they're there."	"Well, it would be nice if we could see them, I'd say. Because I don't think the rioters know they're there."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"671"	" I visited him every Sunday afternoon. Even though apartheid had ended, my mom had made her decision. She didn't want to get married. So we had our house, and he had his. I'd made a deal with my mom that if I went with her to mixed church and white church in the morning, after that, I'd get to skip black church and go to my dad's, where we'd watch Formula 1 racing instead of casting out demons."	"I visited him every Sunday afternoon. Even though apartheid had ended, my mom had made her decision. She didn't want to get married. So we had our house, and he had his. I'd made a deal with my mom that if I went with her to mixed church and white church in the morning, after that, I'd get to skip black church and go to my dad's, where we'd watch Formula  one  racing instead of casting out demons."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"672"	" I celebrated my birthday with my dad every year, and we spent Christmas with him as well. I loved Christmas with my dad because my dad celebrated European Christmas. European Christmas was the best Christmas ever. My dad went all out. He had Christmas lights and a Christmas tree. He had fake snow and snow globes and stockings hung by the fireplace and lots of wrapped presents from Santa Claus. African Christmas was a lot more practical. We'd go to church."	"I celebrated my birthday with my dad every year, and we spent Christmas with him as well. I loved Christmas with my dad because my dad celebrated European Christmas. European Christmas was the best Christmas ever. My dad went all out. He had Christmas lights and a Christmas tree. He had fake snow and snow globes and stockings hung by the fireplace and lots of wrapped presents from Santa Claus. African Christmas was a lot more practical. We'd go to church."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"673"	" Outside of birthdays and special occasions, all we had were our Sunday afternoons. He would cook for me, he'd ask me what I wanted, and I'd always request the exact same meal. A German dish called rosti, which is basically a pancake made out of potatoes and some sort of meat with a gravy. I'd have that and a bottle of Sprite, and for dessert, a plastic container of custard with caramel on top."	"Outside of birthdays and special occasions, all we had were our Sunday afternoons. He would cook for me, he'd ask me what I wanted, and I'd always request the exact same meal. A German dish called rosti, which is basically a pancake made out of potatoes and some sort of meat with a gravy. I'd have that and a bottle of Sprite, and for dessert, a plastic container of custard with caramel on top."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"674"	" A good chunk of those afternoons would pass in silence. My dad didn't talk much. He was caring and devoted, attentive to detail, always a card on my birthday, always my favorite food and toys when I came for a visit. But at the same time, he was a closed book."	"A good chunk of those afternoons would pass in silence. My dad didn't talk much. He was caring and devoted, attentive to detail, always a card on my birthday, always my favorite food and toys when I came for a visit. But at the same time, he was a closed book."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"676"	" When I was 13, my dad moved to Cape Town and we lost touch."	"When I was  thirteen , my dad moved to Cape Town and we lost touch."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"677"	" We'd been losing touch for a while, for a couple of reasons. I was a teenager. I had a whole other world I was dealing with now. Video games and computers meant more to me than spending time with my parents. Also, my mom had married Abel. He was incensed by the idea of my mom being in contact with her previous love, and she decided it was safer for everyone involved not to test his anger."	"We'd been losing touch for a while, for a couple of reasons. I was a teenager. I had a whole other world I was dealing with now. Video games and computers meant more to me than spending time with my parents. Also, my mom had married Abel. He was incensed by the idea of my mom being in contact with her previous love, and she decided it was safer for everyone involved not to test his anger."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"678"	" I went from seeing my dad every Sunday to seeing him every other Sunday. Maybe once a month. Whenever my mom could sneak me over. Same as she'd done back in Hillbrow."	"I went from seeing my dad every Sunday to seeing him every other Sunday. Maybe once a month. Whenever my mom could sneak me over. Same as she'd done back in Hillbrow."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"679"	" We've gone from living under apartheid to living under another kind of tyranny. That of an abusive alcoholic man."	"We've gone from living under apartheid to living under another kind of tyranny. That of an abusive alcoholic man."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"680"	" At the same time, Jovil had started to suffer from white flights, neglect, general decline."	"At the same time, Jovil had started to suffer from white flights, neglect, general decline."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"681"	" Most of my dad's German friends had left for Cape Town."	"Most of my dad's German friends had left for Cape Town."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"682"	" If he wasn't seeing me, he had no reason to stay. So he left."	"If he wasn't seeing me, he had no reason to stay. So he left."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"683"	" His leaving wasn't anything traumatic, because it never registered that we might lose touch and never see each other again. In my mind, it was just, Dad's moving to Cape Town for a bit. Whatever."	"His leaving wasn't anything traumatic, because it never registered that we might lose touch and never see each other again. In my mind, it was just, Dad's moving to Cape Town for a bit. Whatever."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"685"	" I stayed busy living my life, surviving high school, surviving my early twenties, becoming a comedian. My career took off quickly. I got a radio DJ gig and hosted a kids' adventure reality show on television. I was headlining at clubs all over the country. But even as my life was moving forward, the questions about my dad were always there in the back of my mind, bubbling up to the surface now and then. I wonder where he is. Does he think about me? Does he know what I'm doing?"	"I stayed busy living my life, surviving high school, surviving my early twenties, becoming a comedian. My career took off quickly. I got a radio DJ gig and hosted a kids' adventure reality show on television. I was headlining at clubs all over the country. But even as my life was moving forward, the questions about my dad were always there in the back of my mind, bubbling up to the surface now and then. I wonder where he is. Does he think about me? Does he know what I'm doing?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"686"	" When a parent is absent, you're left in the lurch of not knowing, and it's so easy to fill that space with negative thoughts. They don't care. They're selfish."	"When a parent is absent, you're left in the lurch of not knowing, and it's so easy to fill that space with negative thoughts. They don't care. They're selfish."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"687"	" My one saving grace was that my mom never spoke ill of him. She would always compliment him."	"My one saving grace was that my mom never spoke ill of him. She would always compliment him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"688"	" You're good with your money. You get that from your dad."	"You're good with your money. You get that from your dad."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"69"	" If God is with me, who can be against me?"	"If God is with me, who can be against me?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"690"	" You're clean and tidy like your father."	"You're clean and tidy like your father."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"691"	" I never turned to bitterness because she made sure I knew his absence was because of circumstance and not a lack of love."	"I never turned to bitterness because she made sure I knew his absence was because of circumstance and not a lack of love."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"692"	" She always told me the story of her coming home from the hospital and my dad saying, where's my kid? I want that kid in my life."	"She always told me the story of her coming home from the hospital and my dad saying, where's my kid? I want that kid in my life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"694"	" Because my father is so private, finding him was hard work. We didn't have an address. He wasn't in the phone book. I started by reaching out to some of his old connections. German expats in Johannesburg. A woman who used to date one of his friends who knew somebody who knew the last place he stayed."	"Because my father is so private, finding him was hard work. We didn't have an address. He wasn't in the phone book. I started by reaching out to some of his old connections. German expats in Johannesburg. A woman who used to date one of his friends who knew somebody who knew the last place he stayed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"695"	" I got nowhere."	"I got nowhere."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"696"	" Finally, my mom suggested the Swiss Embassy. They have to know where he is, she said, because he has to be in touch with them."	"Finally, my mom suggested the Swiss Embassy. They have to know where he is, she said, because he has to be in touch with them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"697"	" I wrote to the Swiss Embassy asking them where my father was. But because my father is not on my birth certificates, I had no proof that my father is my father. The Embassy wrote back and said they couldn't give me any information because they didn't know who I was. I tried calling them and I got the run around there as well."	"I wrote to the Swiss Embassy asking them where my father was. But because my father is not on my birth certificates, I had no proof that my father is my father. The Embassy wrote back and said they couldn't give me any information because they didn't know who I was. I tried calling them and I got the run around there as well."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"699"	" I kept pestering them and finally they said, okay, we'll take your letter. And if a man such as you're describing exists, we might forward your letter to him. If he doesn't, maybe we won't. Let's see what happens."	"I kept pestering them and finally they said, okay, we'll take your letter. And if a man such as you're describing exists, we might forward your letter to him. If he doesn't, maybe we won't. Let's see what happens."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"7"	" Part 1"	"Part  one ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"70"	" She was never scared, even when she should have been."	"She was never scared, even when she should have been."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"700"	" A few months later, a letter came back in the post. Great to hear from you. How are you? Love, Dad. He gave me his address in Cape Town in a neighborhood called Camps Bay. And a few months later, I went down to visit."	"A few months later, a letter came back in the post. Great to hear from you. How are you? Love, Dad. He gave me his address in Cape Town in a neighborhood called Camps Bay. And a few months later, I went down to visit."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"702"	" My memories of him felt just out of reach. I was trying to remember how he spoke, how he laughed, what his manner was. I parked on his street and started looking for his address. Camps Bay is full of older, semi-retired white people. And as I walked down the road, all these old white men were walking toward me and past me. My father was pushing 70 by that point, and I was so afraid I'd forgotten what he looked like. I was looking in the face of every old white man who passed me"	"My memories of him felt just out of reach. I was trying to remember how he spoke, how he laughed, what his manner was. I parked on his street and started looking for his address. Camps Bay is full of older, semi retired white people. And as I walked down the road, all these old white men were walking toward me and past me. My father was pushing  seventy  by that point, and I was so afraid I'd forgotten what he looked like. I was looking in the face of every old white man who passed me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"703"	" Then, finally I got to the address I'd been given and rang the bell. And the second he opened the door, I recognized him. Hey, it's you, I thought. Of course it's you. You're the guy. I know you."	"Then, finally I got to the address I'd been given and rang the bell. And the second he opened the door, I recognized him. Hey, it's you, I thought. Of course it's you. You're the guy. I know you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"704"	" We picked up right where we'd left off, which was him treating me exactly the way he'd treated me as a 13-year-old boy. Like the creature of habit he was, my father went straight back into it. Right. So where were we? Here, I've got all your favourites. Potato rusty, a bottle of Sprite, cast-dilled with caramel,"	"We picked up right where we'd left off, which was him treating me exactly the way he'd treated me as a  thirteen  year old boy. Like the creature of habit he was, my father went straight back into it. Right. So where were we? Here, I've got all your favourites. Potato rusty, a bottle of Sprite, cast dilled with caramel,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"705"	" Luckily, my tastes hadn't matured much since the age of 13, so I tucked right in."	"Luckily, my tastes hadn't matured much since the age of  thirteen , so I tucked right in."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"707"	" It was a scrapbook of everything I had ever done. Every time my name was mentioned in a newspaper, everything from magazine covers to the tiniest club listings, from the beginning of my career all the way through to that week. He was smiling so big as he took me through it, looking at the headlines. Trevor Noah, appearing this Saturday at the Blues Room. Trevor Noah, hosting new TV show."	"It was a scrapbook of everything I had ever done. Every time my name was mentioned in a newspaper, everything from magazine covers to the tiniest club listings, from the beginning of my career all the way through to that week. He was smiling so big as he took me through it, looking at the headlines. Trevor Noah, appearing this Saturday at the Blues Room. Trevor Noah, hosting new TV show."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"708"	" I felt a flood of emotions rushing through me. It was everything I could do not to start crying. It felt like this ten-year gap in my life closed right up in an instant, like only a day had passed since I'd last seen him."	"I felt a flood of emotions rushing through me. It was everything I could do not to start crying. It felt like this ten year gap in my life closed right up in an instant, like only a day had passed since I'd last seen him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"709"	" For years, I'd had so many questions. Is he thinking about me? Does he know what I'm doing? Is he proud of me?"	"For years, I'd had so many questions. Is he thinking about me? Does he know what I'm doing? Is he proud of me?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"71"	" That call is Sunday we made our circuits of the churches, ending up as usual at White Church. When we walked out of Rosebank Union, it was dark and we were alone. It had been an endless day of minibuses from mixed church to black church to white church and I was exhausted. It was 9 o'clock at least."	"That call is Sunday we made our circuits of the churches, ending up as usual at White Church. When we walked out of Rosebank Union, it was dark and we were alone. It had been an endless day of minibuses from mixed church to black church to white church and I was exhausted. It was  nine  o'clock at least."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"711"	" I walked out of his house that day an inch taller. Seeing him had reaffirmed his choosing of me. He chose to have me in his life. He chose to answer my letter. I was wanted. Being chosen is the greatest gift you can give to another human being."	"I walked out of his house that day an inch taller. Seeing him had reaffirmed his choosing of me. He chose to have me in his life. He chose to answer my letter. I was wanted. Being chosen is the greatest gift you can give to another human being."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"712"	" Once we reconnected, I was overcome by the strive to make up for all the years we'd missed. I decided the best way to do it was to interview him. I realized very quickly that that was a mistake."	"Once we reconnected, I was overcome by the strive to make up for all the years we'd missed. I decided the best way to do it was to interview him. I realized very quickly that that was a mistake."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"713"	" Interviews will give you facts and information, but facts and information weren't really what I was after. What I wanted was a relationship, and an interview is not a relationship. Relationships are built in the silences. You spend time with people, you observe them and interact with them, and you come to know them. And that is what apartheid stole from us. Time. You can't make up for that with an interview, but I had to figure that out for myself."	"Interviews will give you facts and information, but facts and information weren't really what I was after. What I wanted was a relationship, and an interview is not a relationship. Relationships are built in the silences. You spend time with people, you observe them and interact with them, and you come to know them. And that is what apartheid stole from us. Time. You can't make up for that with an interview, but I had to figure that out for myself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"714"	" I went down to spend a few days with my father, and I made it my mission. This weekend, I will get to know my father."	"I went down to spend a few days with my father, and I made it my mission. This weekend, I will get to know my father."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"716"	" Is this how you normally get to know people? By interrogating them? Well, not really. So how do you get to know people?"	"Is this how you normally get to know people? By interrogating them? Well, not really. So how do you get to know people?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"717"	" I don't know. By spending time with them, I guess. Okay? So, spend time with me. See what you find out."	"I don't know. By spending time with them, I guess. Okay? So, spend time with me. See what you find out."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"718"	" So we spent the weekend together. We had dinner and talked about politics. We watched F1 racing and talked about sports. We sat quietly in his backyard and listened to old Elvis Presley records. The whole time he said not one word about himself."	"So we spent the weekend together. We had dinner and talked about politics. We watched F one  racing and talked about sports. We sat quietly in his backyard and listened to old Elvis Presley records. The whole time he said not one word about himself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"719"	" Then, as I was packing up to leave, he walked over to me and sat down. So, he said, in the time we've spent together, what would you say you've learned about your dad?"	"Then, as I was packing up to leave, he walked over to me and sat down. So, he said, in the time we've spent together, what would you say you've learned about your dad?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"720"	" Nothing. All I know is that you're extremely secretive."	"Nothing. All I know is that you're extremely secretive."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"721"	" You see, you're getting to know me already."	"You see, you're getting to know me already."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"722"	" Part 2"	"Part  two ."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"723"	" When Dutch colonists landed at the southern tip of Africa over 300 years ago, they encountered an indigenous people known as the Koisan. The Koisan are the Native Americans of South Africa, a lost tribe of Bushmen, nomadic hunter-gatherers distinct from the darker, Bantu-speaking peoples who later migrated south to become the Zulu, Hossa, and Sutu tribes of modern South Africa."	"When Dutch colonists landed at the southern tip of Africa over  three hundred  years ago, they encountered an indigenous people known as the Koisan. The Koisan are the Native Americans of South Africa, a lost tribe of Bushmen, nomadic hunter gatherers distinct from the darker, Bantu speaking peoples who later migrated south to become the Zulu, Hossa, and Sutu tribes of modern South Africa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"725"	" To work the colonists' farms, slaves were soon imported from different corners of the Dutch Empire, from West Africa, Madagascar, and the West Indies. The slaves and the Khoisan intermarried, and the white colonists continued to dip in and take their liberties, and over time, the Khoisan all but disappeared from South Africa. While most were killed off through disease, famine, and war, the rest of their bloodline was bred out of existence, mixed in with the descendants of whites"	"To work the colonists' farms, slaves were soon imported from different corners of the Dutch Empire, from West Africa, Madagascar, and the West Indies. The slaves and the Khoisan intermarried, and the white colonists continued to dip in and take their liberties, and over time, the Khoisan all but disappeared from South Africa. While most were killed off through disease, famine, and war, the rest of their bloodline was bred out of existence, mixed in with the descendants of whites."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"726"	" The curse that colored people carry is having no clearly defined heritage to go back to. If they trace their lineage back far enough, at a certain point it splits into white and native and a tangled web of other."	"The curse that colored people carry is having no clearly defined heritage to go back to. If they trace their lineage back far enough, at a certain point it splits into white and native and a tangled web of other."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"727"	" Since their native mothers are gone, their strongest affinity has always been with their white fathers, the Afrikaners. Most colored people don't speak African languages. They speak Afrikans. Their religion, their institutions, all of the things that shaped their culture came from Afrikaners."	"Since their native mothers are gone, their strongest affinity has always been with their white fathers, the Afrikaners. Most colored people don't speak African languages. They speak Afrikans. Their religion, their institutions, all of the things that shaped their culture came from Afrikaners."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"728"	" The history of colored people in South Africa is, in this respect, worse than the history of black people in South Africa."	"The history of colored people in South Africa is, in this respect, worse than the history of black people in South Africa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"73"	" I so badly wanted to turn to my mom and say, you see, this is why God wanted us to stay home. But one look at the expression on her face and I knew better than to speak."	"I so badly wanted to turn to my mom and say, you see, this is why God wanted us to stay home. But one look at the expression on her face and I knew better than to speak."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"730"	" 9. The Mulberry Tree"	" nine . The Mulberry Tree."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"731"	" At the end of our street in Eden Park, right in a bend at the top of the road stood a giant mulberry tree growing out of someone's front yard."	"At the end of our street in Eden Park, right in a bend at the top of the road stood a giant mulberry tree growing out of someone's front yard."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"732"	" Every year when it bore fruit, the neighborhood kids would go and pick berries from it, eating as many as they could and filling up bags to take home. They would all play under the tree together. I had to play under the tree by myself. I didn't have any friends in Eden Park."	"Every year when it bore fruit, the neighborhood kids would go and pick berries from it, eating as many as they could and filling up bags to take home. They would all play under the tree together. I had to play under the tree by myself. I didn't have any friends in Eden Park."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"734"	" In Hillbrow, we lived in a white area and nobody looked like me. In Soweto, we lived in a black area and nobody looked like me."	"In Hillbrow, we lived in a white area and nobody looked like me. In Soweto, we lived in a black area and nobody looked like me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"735"	" Eden Park was a colored area. In Eden Park, everyone looked like me. But we couldn't have been more different. It was the biggest mindfuck I've ever experienced."	"Eden Park was a colored area. In Eden Park, everyone looked like me. But we couldn't have been more different. It was the biggest mindfuck I've ever experienced."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"736"	" The animosity I felt from the colored people I encountered growing up was one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. It taught me that it is easier to be an insider as an outsider than to be an outsider as an insider. If a white guy chooses to immerse himself in hip-hop culture and only hang out with black people, black people will say,"	"The animosity I felt from the colored people I encountered growing up was one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. It taught me that it is easier to be an insider as an outsider than to be an outsider as an insider. If a white guy chooses to immerse himself in hip hop culture and only hang out with black people, black people will say,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"737"	" But try being a black person who immerses himself in white culture while still living in the black community. Try being a white person who adopts the trappings of black culture while still living in the white community. You will face more hate and ridicule and ostracism than you can even begin to fathom."	"But try being a black person who immerses himself in white culture while still living in the black community. Try being a white person who adopts the trappings of black culture while still living in the white community. You will face more hate and ridicule and ostracism than you can even begin to fathom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"739"	" When apartheid came, colored people defied easy categorization, so the system used them quite brilliantly to sow confusion, hatred and mistrust. For the purposes of the state, colored people became the almost-whites. They were second-class citizens, denied the rights of white people, but given special privileges that black people didn't have, just to keep them holding out for more. Afrikaners used to call them"	"When apartheid came, colored people defied easy categorization, so the system used them quite brilliantly to sow confusion, hatred and mistrust. For the purposes of the state, colored people became the almost whites. They were second class citizens, denied the rights of white people, but given special privileges that black people didn't have, just to keep them holding out for more. Afrikaners used to call them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"74"	" There were times I could talk smack to my mom. This was not one of them."	"There were times I could talk smack to my mom. This was not one of them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"740"	" Every year under apartheid, some colored people would get promoted to white. It wasn't a myth, it was real. People could submit applications to the government. Your hair might become straight enough, your skin might become light enough, your accent might become polished enough, and you'd be reclassified as white. All you had to do was denounce your people, denounce your history, and leave your darker-skinned friends and family behind."	"Every year under apartheid, some colored people would get promoted to white. It wasn't a myth, it was real. People could submit applications to the government. Your hair might become straight enough, your skin might become light enough, your accent might become polished enough, and you'd be reclassified as white. All you had to do was denounce your people, denounce your history, and leave your darker skinned friends and family behind."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"741"	" The legal definition of a white person under apartheid was, one, who in appearance is obviously a white person, who is generally not accepted as a coloured person, or is generally accepted as a white person and is not in appearance, obviously a white person. It was completely arbitrary, in other words. That's where the government came up with things like the pencil test."	"The legal definition of a white person under apartheid was, one, who in appearance is obviously a white person, who is generally not accepted as a coloured person, or is generally accepted as a white person and is not in appearance, obviously a white person. It was completely arbitrary, in other words. That's where the government came up with things like the pencil test."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"743"	" Sometimes that came down to a lone clerk eyeballing your face and making a snap decision. Depending on how high your cheekbones were or how broad your nose was, he could tick whatever box made sense to him, thereby deciding where you could live, whom you could marry, what jobs and rights and privileges you were allowed."	"Sometimes that came down to a lone clerk eyeballing your face and making a snap decision. Depending on how high your cheekbones were or how broad your nose was, he could tick whatever box made sense to him, thereby deciding where you could live, whom you could marry, what jobs and rights and privileges you were allowed."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"744"	" And colored people didn't just get promoted to white. Sometimes, colored people became Indian. Sometimes Indian people became colored. Sometimes blacks were promoted to colored. And sometimes coloreds were demoted to black. And of course, whites could be demoted to colored as well. That was key. Those mixed bloodlines were always lurking, waiting to peek out. And fear of losing their status kept white people in line."	"And colored people didn't just get promoted to white. Sometimes, colored people became Indian. Sometimes Indian people became colored. Sometimes blacks were promoted to colored. And sometimes coloreds were demoted to black. And of course, whites could be demoted to colored as well. That was key. Those mixed bloodlines were always lurking, waiting to peek out. And fear of losing their status kept white people in line."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"745"	" If two white parents had a child, and the government decided that child was too dark, even if both parents produced documentation proving they were white, the child could be classified as colored, and the family had to make a decision."	"If two white parents had a child, and the government decided that child was too dark, even if both parents produced documentation proving they were white, the child could be classified as colored, and the family had to make a decision."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"746"	" Do they give up their white status to go and live as colored people in a colored area? Or would they split up? The mother taking the colored child to live in the ghetto while the father stayed white to make a living to support them."	"Do they give up their white status to go and live as colored people in a colored area? Or would they split up? The mother taking the colored child to live in the ghetto while the father stayed white to make a living to support them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"748"	" Colored people had it rough."	"Colored people had it rough."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"749"	" Imagine, you've been brainwashed into believing that your blood is tainted. You've spent all your time assimilating and aspiring to whiteness. Then, just as you think you're closing in on the finish line, some fucking guy named Nelson Mandela comes along and flips the country on its head. Now, the finish line is back where the starting line was, and the benchmark is black. Black is in charge. Black is beautiful. Black is powerful."	"Imagine, you've been brainwashed into believing that your blood is tainted. You've spent all your time assimilating and aspiring to whiteness. Then, just as you think you're closing in on the finish line, some fucking guy named Nelson Mandela comes along and flips the country on its head. Now, the finish line is back where the starting line was, and the benchmark is black. Black is in charge. Black is beautiful. Black is powerful."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"75"	" We waited and waited for a minibus to come by."	"We waited and waited for a minibus to come by."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"750"	" For centuries, colored people were told, blacks are monkeys. Don't swing from the trees like them. Learn to walk upright like the white man."	"For centuries, colored people were told, blacks are monkeys. Don't swing from the trees like them. Learn to walk upright like the white man."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"752"	" So you can imagine how weird it was for me. I was mixed, but not colored. Colored by complexion, but not by culture. Because of that, I was seen as a colored person who didn't want to be colored."	"So you can imagine how weird it was for me. I was mixed, but not colored. Colored by complexion, but not by culture. Because of that, I was seen as a colored person who didn't want to be colored."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"753"	" In Eden Park, I encountered two types of colored people. Some colored people hated me because of my blackness. My hair was curly and I was proud of my afro. I spoke African languages and loved speaking them. People would hear me speaking Khosa or Zulu and they'd say, Vada Zay, a busman. What are you, a bushman? Why are you trying to be black? Why do you speak that click-click language? Look at your light skin. You're almost there and you're throwing it away."	"In Eden Park, I encountered two types of colored people. Some colored people hated me because of my blackness. My hair was curly and I was proud of my afro. I spoke African languages and loved speaking them. People would hear me speaking Khosa or Zulu and they'd say, Vada Zay, a busman. What are you, a bushman? Why are you trying to be black? Why do you speak that click click language? Look at your light skin. You're almost there and you're throwing it away."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"754"	" Other colored people hated me because of my whiteness. Even though I identified as black, I had a white father. I went to an English private school. I'd learned to get along with white people at church. I could speak perfect English and I barely spoke Afrikaans. The language colored people were supposed to speak. So colored people thought that I thought I was better than them. They would mock my accent like I was putting on airs. You think you're high class?"	"Other colored people hated me because of my whiteness. Even though I identified as black, I had a white father. I went to an English private school. I'd learned to get along with white people at church. I could speak perfect English and I barely spoke Afrikaans. The language colored people were supposed to speak. So colored people thought that I thought I was better than them. They would mock my accent like I was putting on airs. You think you're high class?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"755"	" Even when I thought I was liked, I wasn't. One year, I got a brand new bike during the summer holidays. My cousin, Mlungisi, and I were taking turns riding around the block. I was riding up our street when this cute colored girl came out to the road and stopped me. She smiled and waved to me sweetly."	"Even when I thought I was liked, I wasn't. One year, I got a brand new bike during the summer holidays. My cousin, Mlungisi, and I were taking turns riding around the block. I was riding up our street when this cute colored girl came out to the road and stopped me. She smiled and waved to me sweetly."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"757"	" Umlungisi was older. My protector. He ran off and found the kids. And 30 minutes later, he came back with my bike."	"Umlungisi was older. My protector. He ran off and found the kids. And  thirty  minutes later, he came back with my bike."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"758"	" Things like that happened a lot. I was bullied all the time. The incident at the Mulberry tree was probably the worst of them."	"Things like that happened a lot. I was bullied all the time. The incident at the Mulberry tree was probably the worst of them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"759"	" Late one afternoon, I was playing by myself, like I always did, running around the neighborhood. This group of five or six colored boys was up the street picking berries off the mulberry tree and eating them. I went over and started picking some to take home for myself. The boys were a few years older than me, around 12 or 13. They didn't talk to me, and I didn't talk to them. They were speaking to one another in Afrikaans, and I could understand what they were saying."	"Late one afternoon, I was playing by myself, like I always did, running around the neighborhood. This group of five or six colored boys was up the street picking berries off the mulberry tree and eating them. I went over and started picking some to take home for myself. The boys were a few years older than me, around  twelve  or  thirteen . They didn't talk to me, and I didn't talk to them. They were speaking to one another in Afrikaans, and I could understand what they were saying."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"76"	" Under apartheid, the government provided no public transportation for blacks. But white people still needed us to show up to mop their floors and clean their bathrooms. Necessity being the mother of invention, black people created their own transit system. An informal network of bus routes, controlled by private associations, operating entirely outside the law."	"Under apartheid, the government provided no public transportation for blacks. But white people still needed us to show up to mop their floors and clean their bathrooms. Necessity being the mother of invention, black people created their own transit system. An informal network of bus routes, controlled by private associations, operating entirely outside the law."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"761"	" Then I felt a splat on the back of my head. He'd hit me with a mulberry. It wasn't painful, just startling. I turned to look at him and splat! He hit me again, right in the face. Then, in a split second, before I could even react, all of these kids started pelting me with berries, pelting the shit out of me. Some of the berries weren't ripe and they stung like rocks. I tried to cover my face with my hands, but there was a barrage coming at me from all sides. They were laughing and pelting me"	"Then I felt a splat on the back of my head. He'd hit me with a mulberry. It wasn't painful, just startling. I turned to look at him and splat! He hit me again, right in the face. Then, in a split second, before I could even react, all of these kids started pelting me with berries, pelting the shit out of me. Some of the berries weren't ripe and they stung like rocks. I tried to cover my face with my hands, but there was a barrage coming at me from all sides. They were laughing and pelting me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"762"	" When I ran inside, I looked like I'd been beaten to a pulp because I was bawling my eyes out and was covered in red purple berry juice. My mother looked at me horrified. What happened? In between sobs I told her the story. These kids, the mulberry tree, they threw berries at me. When I finished, she burst out laughing. It's not funny, I said. No, no, Trevor, she said. I'm not laughing because it's funny."	"When I ran inside, I looked like I'd been beaten to a pulp because I was bawling my eyes out and was covered in red purple berry juice. My mother looked at me horrified. What happened? In between sobs I told her the story. These kids, the mulberry tree, they threw berries at me. When I finished, she burst out laughing. It's not funny, I said. No, no, Trevor, she said. I'm not laughing because it's funny."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"763"	" My mom thought everything was funny. There was no subject too dark or too painful for her to tackle it with humor."	"My mom thought everything was funny. There was no subject too dark or too painful for her to tackle it with humor."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"764"	" Look on the bright side, she said, laughing and pointing to the half of me covered in dark berry juice. Now you really are half black and half white. It's not funny. Trevor, you're okay, she said. Go and wash up, you're not hurt. You're hurt emotionally, but you're not hurt."	"Look on the bright side, she said, laughing and pointing to the half of me covered in dark berry juice. Now you really are half black and half white. It's not funny. Trevor, you're okay, she said. Go and wash up, you're not hurt. You're hurt emotionally, but you're not hurt."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"766"	" When Abel walked in that night, he sat down on the couch and saw that I'd been crying."	"When Abel walked in that night, he sat down on the couch and saw that I'd been crying."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.01"	" What happened?"	"What happened?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.02"	" he said."	"he said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.03"	" I started to explain."	"I started to explain."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.05"	" Don't tell him, she said."	"Don't tell him, she said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.06"	" She knew what would happen."	"She knew what would happen."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.07"	" She knew better than me."	"She knew better than me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.08"	" Don't tell me what Abel said."	"Don't tell me what Abel said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.10"	" It's not nothing, I said."	"It's not nothing, I said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.11"	" She glared at me. Don't tell him."	"She glared at me. Don't tell him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.12"	" Abel was getting frustrated. What? Don't tell me what."	"Abel was getting frustrated. What? Don't tell me what."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.13"	" He'd been drinking."	"He'd been drinking."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.15.2"	" I knew he had a demon inside him, and I hated that."	"I knew he had a demon inside him, and I hated that."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.15"	" It was strange, but in that moment I realized that if I said the right things, I could get him to step in and do something."	"It was strange, but in that moment I realized that if I said the right things, I could get him to step in and do something."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.16"	" We were almost family, and I knew if I made him feel like his family had been insulted, he'd help me get back at the boys."	"We were almost family, and I knew if I made him feel like his family had been insulted, he'd help me get back at the boys."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"767.18"	" But in that moment, I knew exactly what I had to say to get the monster on my side."	"But in that moment, I knew exactly what I had to say to get the monster on my side."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"768"	" I told him the story, the names they called me, the way they attacked me."	"I told him the story, the names they called me, the way they attacked me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"769"	" My mother kept laughing it off, telling me to get over it, that it was kids being kids, no big deal. She was trying to diffuse the situation, but I couldn't see that. I was just mad at her. You'd think it's a joke, but it's not funny. It's not funny!"	"My mother kept laughing it off, telling me to get over it, that it was kids being kids, no big deal. She was trying to diffuse the situation, but I couldn't see that. I was just mad at her. You'd think it's a joke, but it's not funny. It's not funny!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"77"	" Because the minibus business was completely unregulated, it was basically organized crime. Different groups ran different routes, and they would fight over who controlled what. There was bribery and general shadiness that went on, a great deal of violence, and a lot of protection money paid to avoid violence."	"Because the minibus business was completely unregulated, it was basically organized crime. Different groups ran different routes, and they would fight over who controlled what. There was bribery and general shadiness that went on, a great deal of violence, and a lot of protection money paid to avoid violence."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"770"	" Abel wasn't laughing. As I told him what the bullies had done, I could see the anger building up inside him. With Abel's anger, there was no ranting and raving, no clenched fists. He sat there on the couch, listening to me, not saying a word."	"Abel wasn't laughing. As I told him what the bullies had done, I could see the anger building up inside him. With Abel's anger, there was no ranting and raving, no clenched fists. He sat there on the couch, listening to me, not saying a word."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"772"	" We got into his car and drove up the road, stopping a few houses down from the tree."	"We got into his car and drove up the road, stopping a few houses down from the tree."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"773"	" It was dark now, except for the lights from the street lamps. But we could see the boys were still there, playing under the tree. I pointed to the ringleader. That one. He was the main one. Abel slammed his foot on the gas and shot up onto the grass and straight toward the bottom of the tree. He jumped out. I jumped out. As soon as the kids saw me, they knew exactly what was happening. They scattered and ran like hell."	"It was dark now, except for the lights from the street lamps. But we could see the boys were still there, playing under the tree. I pointed to the ringleader. That one. He was the main one. Abel slammed his foot on the gas and shot up onto the grass and straight toward the bottom of the tree. He jumped out. I jumped out. As soon as the kids saw me, they knew exactly what was happening. They scattered and ran like hell."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"774"	" Abel was quick. Good lord, he was fast. The ringleader had made a dash for it and was trying to climb over a wall. Abel grabbed him, pulled him down and dragged him back. Then he stripped a branch off the tree, a switch and started whipping him. He whipped the shit out of him. And I loved it. I have never enjoyed anything as much as I enjoyed that moment. Revenge truly is sweet. It takes you to a dark place, but man, it satisfies a thirst."	"Abel was quick. Good lord, he was fast. The ringleader had made a dash for it and was trying to climb over a wall. Abel grabbed him, pulled him down and dragged him back. Then he stripped a branch off the tree, a switch and started whipping him. He whipped the shit out of him. And I loved it. I have never enjoyed anything as much as I enjoyed that moment. Revenge truly is sweet. It takes you to a dark place, but man, it satisfies a thirst."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"775"	" Then there was the strangest moment where it flipped. I caught a glimpse of the look of terror in the boy's face, and I realized that Abel had gone past getting revenge for me. He wasn't doing this to teach the kid a lesson. He was just beating him. He was a grown man, venting his rage on a 12-year-old boy. In an instant, I went from, yes, I got my revenge, to no, no, no, too much, too much. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, dear God, what have I done?"	"Then there was the strangest moment where it flipped. I caught a glimpse of the look of terror in the boy's face, and I realized that Abel had gone past getting revenge for me. He wasn't doing this to teach the kid a lesson. He was just beating him. He was a grown man, venting his rage on a  twelve  year old boy. In an instant, I went from, yes, I got my revenge, to no, no, no, too much, too much. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, dear God, what have I done?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"777"	" He was crying. I was crying. He was a colored boy in South Africa, taught how to hate and how to hate himself. Who had bullied him that he needed to bully me?"	"He was crying. I was crying. He was a colored boy in South Africa, taught how to hate and how to hate himself. Who had bullied him that he needed to bully me?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"778"	" He'd made me feel fear, and to get my revenge, I'd unleashed my own hell on his world."	"He'd made me feel fear, and to get my revenge, I'd unleashed my own hell on his world."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"779"	" But I knew I'd done a terrible thing."	"But I knew I'd done a terrible thing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"78"	" The one thing you didn't do was steal a root from a rival group."	"The one thing you didn't do was steal a root from a rival group."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"781"	" At home, Abel and my mom got in a huge fight. She was always on him about his temper. You can't go around hitting other people's children. You're not the law. This anger, this is no way to live."	"At home, Abel and my mom got in a huge fight. She was always on him about his temper. You can't go around hitting other people's children. You're not the law. This anger, this is no way to live."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"782"	" A couple of hours later, this kid's dad drove over to our house to confront Abel. Abel went out to the gate, and I watched from inside the house."	"A couple of hours later, this kid's dad drove over to our house to confront Abel. Abel went out to the gate, and I watched from inside the house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"783"	" By that point, Abel was truly drunk. This kid's dad had no idea what he was walking into. He was some mild-mannered, middle-aged guy. I don't remember much about him because I was watching Abel the whole time. I never took my eyes off him. I knew that's where the danger was."	"By that point, Abel was truly drunk. This kid's dad had no idea what he was walking into. He was some mild mannered, middle aged guy. I don't remember much about him because I was watching Abel the whole time. I never took my eyes off him. I knew that's where the danger was."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"784"	" Abel didn't have a gun yet. He bought that later. But Abel didn't need a gun to put the fear of God in you. I watched as he got right in this guy's face. I couldn't hear what the other man was saying, but I heard Abel, don't fuck with me. I will kill you."	"Abel didn't have a gun yet. He bought that later. But Abel didn't need a gun to put the fear of God in you. I watched as he got right in this guy's face. I couldn't hear what the other man was saying, but I heard Abel, don't fuck with me. I will kill you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"786"	" He thought he was coming to defend the honor of his family. He left happy to escape with his life."	"He thought he was coming to defend the honor of his family. He left happy to escape with his life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"787"	" When I was growing up, my mom spent a lot of time trying to teach me about women. She was always giving me lessons, little talks, pieces of advice. It was never a full-blown, sit-down lecture about relationships. It was more like tidbits along the way. And I never understood why. Because I was a kid."	"When I was growing up, my mom spent a lot of time trying to teach me about women. She was always giving me lessons, little talks, pieces of advice. It was never a full blown, sit down lecture about relationships. It was more like tidbits along the way. And I never understood why. Because I was a kid."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"788"	" The only women in my life were my mom and my grandmother and my aunt and my cousin. I had no love interest whatsoever, yet my mom insisted. She would go off on a whole range of things. Trevor, remember a man is not determined by how much he earns. You can still be the man of the house and earn less than your woman. Being a man is not what you have, it's who you are. Being more of a man doesn't mean your woman has to be less than you."	"The only women in my life were my mom and my grandmother and my aunt and my cousin. I had no love interest whatsoever, yet my mom insisted. She would go off on a whole range of things. Trevor, remember a man is not determined by how much he earns. You can still be the man of the house and earn less than your woman. Being a man is not what you have, it's who you are. Being more of a man doesn't mean your woman has to be less than you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"789"	" Trevor, make sure your woman is the woman in your life. Don't be one of these men who makes his wife compete with his mother. A man with a wife cannot be beholden to his mother."	"Trevor, make sure your woman is the woman in your life. Don't be one of these men who makes his wife compete with his mother. A man with a wife cannot be beholden to his mother."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"790"	" The smallest thing could prompt her. I'd walk through the house on the way to my room and say, hey, mom, without glancing up. She'd say, no, Trevor, you look at me. You acknowledge me. Show me that I exist to you, because the way you treat me is the way you will treat your woman. Women like to be noticed. Come and acknowledge me and let me know that you see me. Don't just see me when you need something."	"The smallest thing could prompt her. I'd walk through the house on the way to my room and say, hey, mom, without glancing up. She'd say, no, Trevor, you look at me. You acknowledge me. Show me that I exist to you, because the way you treat me is the way you will treat your woman. Women like to be noticed. Come and acknowledge me and let me know that you see me. Don't just see me when you need something."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"791"	" These little lessons were always about grown-up relationships, funnily enough."	"These little lessons were always about grown up relationships, funnily enough."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"792"	" A young man's long, awkward, occasionally tragic, and frequently humiliating education in affairs of the heart. Part 1. Valentine's Day."	"A young man's long, awkward, occasionally tragic, and frequently humiliating education in affairs of the heart. Part  one . Valentine's Day."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"793"	" It was my first year at H.A. Jack, the primary school I transferred to after leaving Maryvale. Valentine's Day was approaching fast. I was 12 years old and I'd never done Valentine's Day before. We didn't celebrate it in Catholic school."	"It was my first year at H.A. Jack, the primary school I transferred to after leaving Maryvale. Valentine's Day was approaching fast. I was  twelve  years old and I'd never done Valentine's Day before. We didn't celebrate it in Catholic school."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"795"	" Wow, I thought, that seems intense. But I hadn't been shot by Cupid's arrow, and I didn't know of anyone getting shot on my behalf. I had no clue what was going on. All week, the girls in school kept saying, who's your Valentine? Who's your Valentine? I didn't know what I was supposed to do."	"Wow, I thought, that seems intense. But I hadn't been shot by Cupid's arrow, and I didn't know of anyone getting shot on my behalf. I had no clue what was going on. All week, the girls in school kept saying, who's your Valentine? Who's your Valentine? I didn't know what I was supposed to do."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"796"	" Finally, one of the girls, a white girl, said, you should ask Meilin. The other girls agreed. Yes, Meilin, you should definitely ask Meilin. You have to ask Meilin. You guys are perfect for each other."	"Finally, one of the girls, a white girl, said, you should ask Meilin. The other girls agreed. Yes, Meilin, you should definitely ask Meilin. You have to ask Meilin. You guys are perfect for each other."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"797"	" Meileen was a girl I used to walk home from school with. We lived in the city now, me, my mom and Abel, who was now my stepfather and my new baby brother Andrew. We'd sold our house in Eden Park to invest in Abel's new garage. Then that fell apart and we ended up moving to a neighborhood called Highlands North, a 30-minute walk from H.A. Jack."	"Meileen was a girl I used to walk home from school with. We lived in the city now, me, my mom and Abel, who was now my stepfather and my new baby brother Andrew. We'd sold our house in Eden Park to invest in Abel's new garage. Then that fell apart and we ended up moving to a neighborhood called Highlands North, a  thirty  minute walk from H.A. Jack."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"798"	" A group of us would leave school together every afternoon, each kid peeling off and going their separate way when we reached their house. Meyleen and I lived the farthest, so we'd always be the last two. We'd walk together until we got where we needed to go, and then we'd part ways. Meyleen was cool. She was good at tennis, smart, cute. I liked her. I didn't have a crush on her. I wasn't even thinking about girls that way yet. I just liked hanging out with her."	"A group of us would leave school together every afternoon, each kid peeling off and going their separate way when we reached their house. Meyleen and I lived the farthest, so we'd always be the last two. We'd walk together until we got where we needed to go, and then we'd part ways. Meyleen was cool. She was good at tennis, smart, cute. I liked her. I didn't have a crush on her. I wasn't even thinking about girls that way yet. I just liked hanging out with her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"8"	" The genius of apartheid was convincing people who were the overwhelming majority to turn on each other. Apart hate is what it was. You separate people into groups and make them hate one another so you can run them all."	"The genius of apartheid was convincing people who were the overwhelming majority to turn on each other. Apart hate is what it was. You separate people into groups and make them hate one another so you can run them all."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"80"	" Being unregulated, minibuses were also very unreliable. When they came, they came. When they didn't, they didn't."	"Being unregulated, minibuses were also very unreliable. When they came, they came. When they didn't, they didn't."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"800"	" I liked Meilin as much as I liked anyone, I suppose. Mostly I think I liked the idea of being liked. I decided I'd ask her to be my Valentine. But I had no idea how to do it. I didn't know the first thing about having a girlfriend."	"I liked Meilin as much as I liked anyone, I suppose. Mostly I think I liked the idea of being liked. I decided I'd ask her to be my Valentine. But I had no idea how to do it. I didn't know the first thing about having a girlfriend."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"801"	" I had to be taught the whole love bureaucracy of the school. There was the thing where you don't actually talk straight to the person. You have your group of friends and she has her group of friends. And your group of friends has to go to her group of friends and say, okay, Trevor likes Meleen. He wants her to be his Valentine. We're in favor. We're ready to sign off with your approval."	"I had to be taught the whole love bureaucracy of the school. There was the thing where you don't actually talk straight to the person. You have your group of friends and she has her group of friends. And your group of friends has to go to her group of friends and say, okay, Trevor likes Meleen. He wants her to be his Valentine. We're in favor. We're ready to sign off with your approval."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"803"	" The girls told me this process was what needed to happen. I said, cool, let's do it. The friends sorted it out, Meilin got on board, and I was all set."	"The girls told me this process was what needed to happen. I said, cool, let's do it. The friends sorted it out, Meilin got on board, and I was all set."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"804"	" The week before Valentine's, Meilin and I were walking home together, and I was trying to get up the courage to ask her. I was so nervous. I'd never done anything like it. I already knew the answer. Her friends had told me she'd say yes. It's like being in Congress. You know you have the votes before you go to the floor, but it's still difficult because anything could happen."	"The week before Valentine's, Meilin and I were walking home together, and I was trying to get up the courage to ask her. I was so nervous. I'd never done anything like it. I already knew the answer. Her friends had told me she'd say yes. It's like being in Congress. You know you have the votes before you go to the floor, but it's still difficult because anything could happen."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"805"	" I didn't know how to do it. All I knew was I wanted it to be perfect. So I waited until we were standing outside McDonald's. Then I mustered up all of my courage and turned to her."	"I didn't know how to do it. All I knew was I wanted it to be perfect. So I waited until we were standing outside McDonald's. Then I mustered up all of my courage and turned to her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"806"	" Hey"	"Hey."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"808"	" And I was wondering, would you be my Valentine?"	"And I was wondering, would you be my Valentine?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"809"	" Yes, I'll be your Valentine."	"Yes, I'll be your Valentine."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"81"	" Standing outside Rosebank Union, I was literally falling asleep on my feet. Not a minibus in sight. Eventually my mother said, let's hitchhike."	"Standing outside Rosebank Union, I was literally falling asleep on my feet. Not a minibus in sight. Eventually my mother said, let's hitchhike."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"810"	" And then, under the golden arches, we kissed. It was my first time ever kissing a girl."	"And then, under the golden arches, we kissed. It was my first time ever kissing a girl."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"812"	" Now, I was truly excited. I had a Valentine, I had a girlfriend. I spent the whole week thinking about Meilin, wanting to make her Valentine's Day as memorable as I could."	"Now, I was truly excited. I had a Valentine, I had a girlfriend. I spent the whole week thinking about Meilin, wanting to make her Valentine's Day as memorable as I could."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"813"	" I saved up my pocket money and bought her flowers and a teddy bear and a card. I wrote a poem with her name in the card, which was really hard because there aren't many good words that rhyme with Maylene. Machine? Ravine? Sardine?"	"I saved up my pocket money and bought her flowers and a teddy bear and a card. I wrote a poem with her name in the card, which was really hard because there aren't many good words that rhyme with Maylene. Machine? Ravine? Sardine?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"814"	" Then, the big day came. I got my valentine's card and the flowers and the teddy bear and got them ready and took them to school. I was the happiest boy on earth."	"Then, the big day came. I got my valentine's card and the flowers and the teddy bear and got them ready and took them to school. I was the happiest boy on earth."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"815"	" The teachers had set aside a period before recess for everyone to exchange Valentines. There was a corridor outside our classrooms where I knew Meileen would be, and I waited for her there. All around me, love was in bloom. Boys and girls exchanging cards and gifts, laughing and giggling and stealing kisses. I waited and waited."	"The teachers had set aside a period before recess for everyone to exchange Valentines. There was a corridor outside our classrooms where I knew Meileen would be, and I waited for her there. All around me, love was in bloom. Boys and girls exchanging cards and gifts, laughing and giggling and stealing kisses. I waited and waited."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"817"	" Um... Listen. I can't be your girlfriend anymore. Lorenzo asked me to be his Valentine, and I can't have two Valentines, so I'm his girlfriend now and not yours."	"Um... Listen. I can't be your girlfriend anymore. Lorenzo asked me to be his Valentine, and I can't have two Valentines, so I'm his girlfriend now and not yours."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"818"	" She said it so matter-of-factly that I had no idea how to process it. This was my first time having a girlfriend. So at first I thought, huh, maybe this is just how it goes. Oh, okay, I said. Well, um, happy Valentine's Day. I held out the card and the flowers and the teddy bear. She took them and said, thanks, and she was gone."	"She said it so matter of factly that I had no idea how to process it. This was my first time having a girlfriend. So at first I thought, huh, maybe this is just how it goes. Oh, okay, I said. Well, um, happy Valentine's Day. I held out the card and the flowers and the teddy bear. She took them and said, thanks, and she was gone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"819"	" I felt like someone had taken a gun and shot holes in every part of me."	"I felt like someone had taken a gun and shot holes in every part of me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"82"	" We walked and walked and after what felt like an eternity, a car drove up and stopped. The driver offered us a ride and we climbed in."	"We walked and walked and after what felt like an eternity, a car drove up and stopped. The driver offered us a ride and we climbed in."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"821"	" As devastated as I was, I understood why Meilin made the choice that she did. I would have picked Lorenzo over me too. All the other kids were running up and down the corridors and out on the playground, laughing and smiling with their red and pink cards and flowers. And I went back to the classroom and sat by myself and waited for the bell to ring."	"As devastated as I was, I understood why Meilin made the choice that she did. I would have picked Lorenzo over me too. All the other kids were running up and down the corridors and out on the playground, laughing and smiling with their red and pink cards and flowers. And I went back to the classroom and sat by myself and waited for the bell to ring."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"822"	" Petrol for the car, like food, was an expense we could not avoid. But my mom could get more mileage out of a tank of petrol than any human who has ever been on a road in the history of automobiles. She knew every trick. Driving around Johannesburg in our rusty old Volkswagen, every time she stopped in traffic, she'd turn off the car. Then the traffic would start and she'd turn the car on again. That stop-start technology that they use in hybrid cars now?"	"Petrol for the car, like food, was an expense we could not avoid. But my mom could get more mileage out of a tank of petrol than any human who has ever been on a road in the history of automobiles. She knew every trick. Driving around Johannesburg in our rusty old Volkswagen, every time she stopped in traffic, she'd turn off the car. Then the traffic would start and she'd turn the car on again. That stop start technology that they use in hybrid cars now?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"823"	" There were times when we would be in traffic and we had so little money for petrol that I would have to push the car. If we were stuck in gridlock, my mom would turn the car off and it was my job to get out and push it forward, six inches at a time. People would pitch up and offer to help. Are you stuck? Nope, we're fine. You sure? Yep. Can we help you? Nope. Do you need a tow? And what do you say? The truth."	"There were times when we would be in traffic and we had so little money for petrol that I would have to push the car. If we were stuck in gridlock, my mom would turn the car off and it was my job to get out and push it forward, six inches at a time. People would pitch up and offer to help. Are you stuck? Nope, we're fine. You sure? Yep. Can we help you? Nope. Do you need a tow? And what do you say? The truth."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"824"	" Thanks, but we're just so poor my mom makes her kid push the car. That was some of the most embarrassing shit in my life. Pushing the car to school like the fucking Flintstones."	"Thanks, but we're just so poor my mom makes her kid push the car. That was some of the most embarrassing shit in my life. Pushing the car to school like the fucking Flintstones."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"826"	" 11. Outsider"	" eleven . Outsider."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"827"	" After finishing primary school at H.A. Jack, I started grade 8 at Sandringham High School. Even after apartheid, most black people still lived in the townships, and the areas formerly designated as homelands were the only available government schools with a broken remnants of the Bantu system."	"After finishing primary school at H.A. Jack, I started grade  eight  at Sandringham High School. Even after apartheid, most black people still lived in the townships, and the areas formerly designated as homelands were the only available government schools with a broken remnants of the Bantu system."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"828"	" Wealthy white kids, along with the few black people and colored people and Indians who had money or could get scholarships, were holed up in private schools, which were super expensive but virtually guaranteed entry into university."	"Wealthy white kids, along with the few black people and colored people and Indians who had money or could get scholarships, were holed up in private schools, which were super expensive but virtually guaranteed entry into university."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"829"	" Sandringham was what we call a Model C school, which meant it was a mix of government and private, similar to charter schools in America. The place was huge. A thousand kids on sprawling grounds with tennis courts, sports fields and a swimming pool."	"Sandringham was what we call a Model C school, which meant it was a mix of government and private, similar to charter schools in America. The place was huge. A thousand kids on sprawling grounds with tennis courts, sports fields and a swimming pool."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"830"	" Being a model C school and not a government school, Sandringham drew kids from all over, making it a near-perfect microcosm of post-apartheid South Africa as a whole. A perfect example of what South Africa has the potential to be. We had rich white kids, a bunch of middle-class white kids, and some working-class white kids. We had black kids who were newly rich, black kids who were middle-class, and black kids from the township. We had colored kids and Indian kids, and even a handful of Chinese kids too."	"Being a model C school and not a government school, Sandringham drew kids from all over, making it a near perfect microcosm of post apartheid South Africa as a whole. A perfect example of what South Africa has the potential to be. We had rich white kids, a bunch of middle class white kids, and some working class white kids. We had black kids who were newly rich, black kids who were middle class, and black kids from the township. We had colored kids and Indian kids, and even a handful of Chinese kids too."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"831"	" The pupils were as integrated as they could be, given that apartheid had just ended. At H.A. Jack, race was broken up into blocks. Sandringham was more like a spectrum."	"The pupils were as integrated as they could be, given that apartheid had just ended. At H.A. Jack, race was broken up into blocks. Sandringham was more like a spectrum."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"832"	" South African schools don't have cafeterias. At Sandringham, we'd buy our lunch at what we call the tuck shop, a little canteen, and then have free reign to go wherever we wanted on the school grounds to eat. The quad, the courtyard, the playground, wherever. Kids would break off and cluster into their cliques and groups. People were still grouped by color in most cases, but you could see how they all blended and shaded into one another. The kids who played soccer were mostly black,"	"South African schools don't have cafeterias. At Sandringham, we'd buy our lunch at what we call the tuck shop, a little canteen, and then have free reign to go wherever we wanted on the school grounds to eat. The quad, the courtyard, the playground, wherever. Kids would break off and cluster into their cliques and groups. People were still grouped by color in most cases, but you could see how they all blended and shaded into one another. The kids who played soccer were mostly black,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"833"	" At break, as the only mixed kid out of a thousand, I faced the same predicament I had on the playground at H.A. Jack. Where was I supposed to go? Even with so many different groups to choose from, I wasn't a natural constituent of any particular one. I obviously wasn't Indian or Chinese. The colored kids would shit on me all the time for being too black, so I wasn't welcome there. As always, I was adept enough with the white kids not to get bullied by them. But the white kids were always going shopping, going to the movies,"	"At break, as the only mixed kid out of a thousand, I faced the same predicament I had on the playground at H.A. Jack. Where was I supposed to go? Even with so many different groups to choose from, I wasn't a natural constituent of any particular one. I obviously wasn't Indian or Chinese. The colored kids would shit on me all the time for being too black, so I wasn't welcome there. As always, I was adept enough with the white kids not to get bullied by them. But the white kids were always going shopping, going to the movies,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"835"	" There was one time I stood up and then the prefect named the five people and I wasn't one of them. Everyone burst out laughing. Somebody yelled out, where's Trevor? The prefect looked at the paper and shook his head. Nope. The entire hall erupted with cheers and applause. Yeah."	"There was one time I stood up and then the prefect named the five people and I wasn't one of them. Everyone burst out laughing. Somebody yelled out, where's Trevor? The prefect looked at the paper and shook his head. Nope. The entire hall erupted with cheers and applause. Yeah."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"836"	" Then, immediately after assembly, there would be a race to the tuck shop, because the queue to buy food was so long. Every minute you spent in the queue was working against your break time. The sooner you got your food, the longer you had to eat, play a game of soccer, or hang out. Also, if you got there late, the best food was gone."	"Then, immediately after assembly, there would be a race to the tuck shop, because the queue to buy food was so long. Every minute you spent in the queue was working against your break time. The sooner you got your food, the longer you had to eat, play a game of soccer, or hang out. Also, if you got there late, the best food was gone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"837"	" Two things were true about me at that age. One, I was still the fastest kid in school. And two, I had no pride."	"Two things were true about me at that age. One, I was still the fastest kid in school. And two, I had no pride."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"838"	" The second we were dismissed from assembly, I would run like a bat out of hell to the tuck shop so I could be the first one there. I was always first in line. I became notorious for being that guy. So much so that people started coming up to me in line. Hey, can you buy this for me? Which would piss off the kids behind me because it was basically cutting the line. So people started approaching me during assembly. They'd say, hey, I've got 10 rand. If you buy my food for me,"	"The second we were dismissed from assembly, I would run like a bat out of hell to the tuck shop so I could be the first one there. I was always first in line. I became notorious for being that guy. So much so that people started coming up to me in line. Hey, can you buy this for me? Which would piss off the kids behind me because it was basically cutting the line. So people started approaching me during assembly. They'd say, hey, I've got  ten  rand. If you buy my food for me,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.002"	" Fat Guys were my number one customers."	"Fat Guys were my number one customers."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.003"	" They loved food, but couldn't run."	"They loved food, but couldn't run."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.004"	" I had all these rich fat white kids who were like, this is fantastic. My parents spoil me, I've got money and now I've got a way I can get food without having to work for it. And I still get my break."	"I had all these rich fat white kids who were like, this is fantastic. My parents spoil me, I've got money and now I've got a way I can get food without having to work for it. And I still get my break."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.005"	" I had so many customers, I was turning kids away."	"I had so many customers, I was turning kids away."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.007"	" I'd make so much that I could buy my lunch using other kids' money and keep the lunch money my mom gave me for pocket cash."	"I'd make so much that I could buy my lunch using other kids' money and keep the lunch money my mom gave me for pocket cash."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.008"	" Then I could afford to catch a bus home instead of walking or save up to buy whatever."	"Then I could afford to catch a bus home instead of walking or save up to buy whatever."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.009"	" Every day I'll take orders. Assembly would end, and I'd make my mad dash and buy everybody's hot dogs and cokes and muffins."	"Every day I'll take orders. Assembly would end, and I'd make my mad dash and buy everybody's hot dogs and cokes and muffins."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.010"	" If you paid me extra, you could even tell me where you'd be and I'll deliver it to you."	"If you paid me extra, you could even tell me where you'd be and I'll deliver it to you."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.012"	" Since I belong to no group, I learn to move seamlessly between groups."	"Since I belong to no group, I learn to move seamlessly between groups."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.013"	" I floated. I was a chameleon. Still a cultural chameleon."	"I floated. I was a chameleon. Still a cultural chameleon."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.014"	" I learned how to blend."	"I learned how to blend."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.015"	" I could play sports with the jocks. I could talk computers with the nerds. I could jump in the circle and dance with the township kids."	"I could play sports with the jocks. I could talk computers with the nerds. I could jump in the circle and dance with the township kids."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.017"	" I was like a weed dealer, but of food."	"I was like a weed dealer, but of food."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.018"	" The weed guy is always welcome at the party. He's not a part of the circle, but he's invited into the circle temporarily because of what he can offer."	"The weed guy is always welcome at the party. He's not a part of the circle, but he's invited into the circle temporarily because of what he can offer."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.019"	" That's who I was. Always an outsider."	"That's who I was. Always an outsider."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"839.020"	" As the outsider, you can retreat into a shell, be anonymous, be invisible. Or you can go the other way. You protect yourself by opening up. You don't ask to be accepted for everything you are, just the one part of yourself that you're willing to share."	"As the outsider, you can retreat into a shell, be anonymous, be invisible. Or you can go the other way. You protect yourself by opening up. You don't ask to be accepted for everything you are, just the one part of yourself that you're willing to share."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"84"	" A Zulu driver got out with an Iwiisa. A large traditional Zulu weapon. A war club, basically. They're used to smash people's skulls in. Another guy, his crony, got out of the passenger side. They walked up to the driver's side of the car we were in, grabbed the man who'd offered us a ride, pulled him out, and started shoving their clubs in his face. Why are you stealing our customers? Why are you picking people up? It looked like they were gonna kill this guy. I knew that happened sometimes."	"A Zulu driver got out with an Iwiisa. A large traditional Zulu weapon. A war club, basically. They're used to smash people's skulls in. Another guy, his crony, got out of the passenger side. They walked up to the driver's side of the car we were in, grabbed the man who'd offered us a ride, pulled him out, and started shoving their clubs in his face. Why are you stealing our customers? Why are you picking people up? It looked like they were gonna kill this guy. I knew that happened sometimes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"840"	" I learned that even though I didn't belong to one group, I could be a part of any group that was laughing. I'd drop in, pass out the snacks, tell a few jokes. I'd perform for them. I'd catch a bit of their conversation, learn more about their group, and then leave. I never overstayed my welcome. I wasn't popular, but I wasn't an outcast. I was everywhere with everybody, and at the same time, I was all by myself."	"I learned that even though I didn't belong to one group, I could be a part of any group that was laughing. I'd drop in, pass out the snacks, tell a few jokes. I'd perform for them. I'd catch a bit of their conversation, learn more about their group, and then leave. I never overstayed my welcome. I wasn't popular, but I wasn't an outcast. I was everywhere with everybody, and at the same time, I was all by myself."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"841"	" I don't regret anything I've ever done in life, any choice that I've made. But I'm consumed with regret for the things I didn't do, the choices I didn't make, the things I didn't say. We spend so much time being afraid of failure, afraid of rejection. But regret is the thing we should fear most. Failure is an answer. Rejection is an answer. Regret is an eternal question you will never have the answer to. What if?"	"I don't regret anything I've ever done in life, any choice that I've made. But I'm consumed with regret for the things I didn't do, the choices I didn't make, the things I didn't say. We spend so much time being afraid of failure, afraid of rejection. But regret is the thing we should fear most. Failure is an answer. Rejection is an answer. Regret is an eternal question you will never have the answer to. What if?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"842"	" if only."	"if only."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"844"	" You will never, never know, and it will haunt you for the rest of your days."	"You will never, never know, and it will haunt you for the rest of your days."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"845"	" 12. A young man's long, awkward, occasionally tragic and frequently humiliating education in affairs of the heart. Part 2. The Crush."	" twelve . A young man's long, awkward, occasionally tragic and frequently humiliating education in affairs of the heart. Part  two . The Crush."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"846"	" In high school, the attention of girls was not an affliction I suffered from. I wasn't the hot guy in class. I wasn't even the cute guy in class. I was ugly. Puberty was not kind to me. My acne was so bad that people used to ask what was wrong with me, like I'd had an allergic reaction to something. It was the kind of acne that qualifies as a medical condition. Acne vulgaris, the doctor called it. We're not talking about pimples, kids. We're talking pustules."	"In high school, the attention of girls was not an affliction I suffered from. I wasn't the hot guy in class. I wasn't even the cute guy in class. I was ugly. Puberty was not kind to me. My acne was so bad that people used to ask what was wrong with me, like I'd had an allergic reaction to something. It was the kind of acne that qualifies as a medical condition. Acne vulgaris, the doctor called it. We're not talking about pimples, kids. We're talking pustules."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"847"	" Being poor didn't help. Not only could I not afford a decent haircut, leaving me with a huge, unruly afro, but my mother also used to get angry at the fact that I grew out of my school uniforms too fast. So to save money, she started buying my clothes three sizes too big. My blazer was too long, and my pants were too baggy, and my shoes flopped around. I was a clown. And of course, Murphy's Law, the year my mom started buying my clothes too big,"	"Being poor didn't help. Not only could I not afford a decent haircut, leaving me with a huge, unruly afro, but my mother also used to get angry at the fact that I grew out of my school uniforms too fast. So to save money, she started buying my clothes three sizes too big. My blazer was too long, and my pants were too baggy, and my shoes flopped around. I was a clown. And of course, Murphy's Law, the year my mom started buying my clothes too big,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"849"	" For me to try to get a girl would have upset the natural order of things. Part of my success as the tuck shop guy was that I was welcome everywhere and I was welcome everywhere because I was nobody. I was the acne ridden clown with duck feet and floppy shoes. I wasn't a threat to the guys. I wasn't a threat to the girls. The minute I became somebody, I risked no longer being welcomed as nobody. The pretty girls were already spoken for. The popular guys had staked their claim."	"For me to try to get a girl would have upset the natural order of things. Part of my success as the tuck shop guy was that I was welcome everywhere and I was welcome everywhere because I was nobody. I was the acne ridden clown with duck feet and floppy shoes. I wasn't a threat to the guys. I wasn't a threat to the girls. The minute I became somebody, I risked no longer being welcomed as nobody. The pretty girls were already spoken for. The popular guys had staked their claim."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"85"	" We were the only passengers in the minibus. In addition to being violent, South African minibus drivers are notorious for complaining and haranguing passengers as they drive. This driver was a particularly angry one. As we rode along, he started lecturing my mother about being in a car with a man who was not her husband. My mother didn't suffer lectures from strange men. She told him to mind his own business, and when he heard her speaking in Kossa, that rarely set him off."	"We were the only passengers in the minibus. In addition to being violent, South African minibus drivers are notorious for complaining and haranguing passengers as they drive. This driver was a particularly angry one. As we rode along, he started lecturing my mother about being in a car with a man who was not her husband. My mother didn't suffer lectures from strange men. She told him to mind his own business, and when he heard her speaking in Kossa, that rarely set him off."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"850"	" At Sandringham, the only time girls in class looked at me was when they wanted me to pass a letter to the hot guy in class. But there was one girl I knew named Joanna. Joanna and I had been at the same school intermittently our whole lives. We were in preschool at Maryville together. Then she left and went to another school. Then we were in primary school at H.A. Jack together. Then she left and went to another school. Then finally we were at Sandringham together. Because of that, we became friends."	"At Sandringham, the only time girls in class looked at me was when they wanted me to pass a letter to the hot guy in class. But there was one girl I knew named Joanna. Joanna and I had been at the same school intermittently our whole lives. We were in preschool at Maryville together. Then she left and went to another school. Then we were in primary school at H.A. Jack together. Then she left and went to another school. Then finally we were at Sandringham together. Because of that, we became friends."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"851"	" Joanna was one of the popular girls. Her best friend was Zahira. Joanna was beautiful. Zahira was stunning. Zahira was colored, Cape Millay. She looked like Selma Hayek. Joanna was out and about and kissing boys, so the guys were all into her. Zahira, as beautiful as she was, was extremely shy, so there weren't as many guys after her. Joanna and Zahira were always together. They were one grade below me."	"Joanna was one of the popular girls. Her best friend was Zahira. Joanna was beautiful. Zahira was stunning. Zahira was colored, Cape Millay. She looked like Selma Hayek. Joanna was out and about and kissing boys, so the guys were all into her. Zahira, as beautiful as she was, was extremely shy, so there weren't as many guys after her. Joanna and Zahira were always together. They were one grade below me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"853"	" At a certain point, I decided to map out a strategy. I decided I'd be best friends with Zihira and stay friends with her long enough to ask her to the matric dance, what we call our senior prom. Mind you, we were in grade 9 at this point. The matric dance was three years away. But I decided to play the long game. I was like, yep, just going to take my time. Because that's what happens in the movies, right? I've seen my American high school movies. You hang around long enough as the"	"At a certain point, I decided to map out a strategy. I decided I'd be best friends with Zihira and stay friends with her long enough to ask her to the matric dance, what we call our senior prom. Mind you, we were in grade  nine  at this point. The matric dance was three years away. But I decided to play the long game. I was like, yep, just going to take my time. Because that's what happens in the movies, right? I've seen my American high school movies. You hang around long enough as the."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"854"	" One day, I don't know how, but I plucked up the courage to ask Zahira for her phone number. Which was a big deal back then, because it wasn't like cell phone numbers where everybody has everyone's number for texting and everything. This was the landline to her house where her parents might answer. We were talking one afternoon at school and I asked, can I get your phone number? Maybe I can call you and we can talk at home sometime. She said yes."	"One day, I don't know how, but I plucked up the courage to ask Zahira for her phone number. Which was a big deal back then, because it wasn't like cell phone numbers where everybody has everyone's number for texting and everything. This was the landline to her house where her parents might answer. We were talking one afternoon at school and I asked, can I get your phone number? Maybe I can call you and we can talk at home sometime. She said yes."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"855"	" I called her that night. At seven. She'd given me her number at two. That was me being cool. Dude, don't call her at five. That's too obvious. Call her at seven."	"I called her that night. At seven. She'd given me her number at two. That was me being cool. Dude, don't call her at five. That's too obvious. Call her at seven."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"856"	" I found her house that night. Her mom answered. I said, may I speak to Zahira, please? Her mom called her and she came to the phone. And we talked. For like an hour. After that, we started talking more. At school, on the phone. I never told her how I felt. Never made a move. Nothing. I was always too scared."	"I found her house that night. Her mom answered. I said, may I speak to Zahira, please? Her mom called her and she came to the phone. And we talked. For like an hour. After that, we started talking more. At school, on the phone. I never told her how I felt. Never made a move. Nothing. I was always too scared."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"858"	" Then, we had the mid-year school holidays. The day we came back, Zahira wasn't at school. Then she wasn't at school the next day. Then, she wasn't at school the day after that. Eventually, I went and tracked down Joanna on the quad. Hey, where's Zahira? I said. She hasn't been around for a while. Is she sick? No, she said. Didn't anyone tell you? She left the school. She doesn't go here anymore. What?"	"Then, we had the mid year school holidays. The day we came back, Zahira wasn't at school. Then she wasn't at school the next day. Then, she wasn't at school the day after that. Eventually, I went and tracked down Joanna on the quad. Hey, where's Zahira? I said. She hasn't been around for a while. Is she sick? No, she said. Didn't anyone tell you? She left the school. She doesn't go here anymore. What?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"859"	" She ran off and left me standing there, stunned. She'd hit me with so much information at once. First, that Zahira was gone. Then, that she had left for America. And then, that she'd liked me all along. It was like I had been hit by three successive waves of heartbreak, each one bigger than the last. My mind raced through all the hours we'd spent talking on the quad, on the phone. All the times I could have said, hey, Zahira,"	"She ran off and left me standing there, stunned. She'd hit me with so much information at once. First, that Zahira was gone. Then, that she had left for America. And then, that she'd liked me all along. It was like I had been hit by three successive waves of heartbreak, each one bigger than the last. My mind raced through all the hours we'd spent talking on the quad, on the phone. All the times I could have said, hey, Zahira,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"86"	" The stereotypes of Zulu and Khosa women were as ingrained as those of the men. Zulu women were well behaved and dutiful. Khosa women were promiscuous and unfaithful. And here was my mother, his tribal enemy, a Khosa woman alone with two small children, one of them a mixed child no less. Not just a whore, but a whore who sleeps with white men. Oh, Yura Khosa, he said. That explains it."	"The stereotypes of Zulu and Khosa women were as ingrained as those of the men. Zulu women were well behaved and dutiful. Khosa women were promiscuous and unfaithful. And here was my mother, his tribal enemy, a Khosa woman alone with two small children, one of them a mixed child no less. Not just a whore, but a whore who sleeps with white men. Oh, Yura Khosa, he said. That explains it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"860"	" Ten words that might have changed my life if I'd had the courage to say them. But I hadn't. And now, she was gone."	"Ten words that might have changed my life if I'd had the courage to say them. But I hadn't. And now, she was gone."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"862"	" Most black people integrating into white suburbs were moving to places like Bramley and Lombardy East. But for some reason, my mom chose Highlands North."	"Most black people integrating into white suburbs were moving to places like Bramley and Lombardy East. But for some reason, my mom chose Highlands North."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"863"	" It was a suburban area, lots of shopping, working people mostly. Not wealthy, but stable and middle class. Older houses, but still a nice place to live."	"It was a suburban area, lots of shopping, working people mostly. Not wealthy, but stable and middle class. Older houses, but still a nice place to live."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"864"	" In Soweto, I was the only white kid in the black township. In Eden Park, I was the only mixed kid in the colored area. In Highlands North, I was the only black kid in the white suburb. And by only, I mean only. In Highlands North, the white never took flight. It was a largely Jewish neighborhood. And Jewish people don't flee. They're done fleeing. They've already fled. They get to a place, build their shul, and hold it down."	"In Soweto, I was the only white kid in the black township. In Eden Park, I was the only mixed kid in the colored area. In Highlands North, I was the only black kid in the white suburb. And by only, I mean only. In Highlands North, the white never took flight. It was a largely Jewish neighborhood. And Jewish people don't flee. They're done fleeing. They've already fled. They get to a place, build their shul, and hold it down."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"865"	" I didn't make any friends in Highlands North for the longest time. I had an easier time making friends in Eden Park, to be honest. In the suburbs, everyone lived behind walls. The white neighborhoods of Johannesburg were built on white fear, fear of black crime, fear of black uprisings and reprisals. And as a result, virtually every house sits behind a six-foot wall, and on top of that wall is electric wire. Everyone lives in a plush, fancy, maximum-security prison."	"I didn't make any friends in Highlands North for the longest time. I had an easier time making friends in Eden Park, to be honest. In the suburbs, everyone lived behind walls. The white neighborhoods of Johannesburg were built on white fear, fear of black crime, fear of black uprisings and reprisals. And as a result, virtually every house sits behind a six foot wall, and on top of that wall is electric wire. Everyone lives in a plush, fancy, maximum security prison."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"867"	" For a long time, those kids were my only friends."	"For a long time, those kids were my only friends."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"868"	" 13. Colourblind"	" thirteen . Colourblind."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"869"	" At Sandringham, I got to know this one kid, Teddy. Funny guy. Charming as hell. My mom used to call him Bugs Bunny. He had a cheeky smile with two big teeth that stuck out the front of his mouth. Teddy and I got along like a house on fire. One of those friends where you start hanging out and from that day forward you're never apart. We were both naughty as shit too. With Teddy, I'd finally met someone who made me feel normal."	"At Sandringham, I got to know this one kid, Teddy. Funny guy. Charming as hell. My mom used to call him Bugs Bunny. He had a cheeky smile with two big teeth that stuck out the front of his mouth. Teddy and I got along like a house on fire. One of those friends where you start hanging out and from that day forward you're never apart. We were both naughty as shit too. With Teddy, I'd finally met someone who made me feel normal."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"87"	" My mom kept telling him off and he kept calling her names, yelling at her from the front seat, wagging his finger in the rearview mirror and growing more and more menacing until finally he said, that's the problem with youth possa women. You're all sluts and tonight you're going to learn your lesson."	"My mom kept telling him off and he kept calling her names, yelling at her from the front seat, wagging his finger in the rearview mirror and growing more and more menacing until finally he said, that's the problem with youth possa women. You're all sluts and tonight you're going to learn your lesson."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"871"	" Teddy's mom worked as a domestic for a family in Lynxfield, a wealthy suburb near school. Lynxfield was a long walk from my house, nearly 40 minutes, but still doable. Walking around was pretty much all I did back then anyway. I couldn't afford to do anything else, and I couldn't afford to get around any other way. If you liked walking, you were my friend."	"Teddy's mom worked as a domestic for a family in Lynxfield, a wealthy suburb near school. Lynxfield was a long walk from my house, nearly  forty  minutes, but still doable. Walking around was pretty much all I did back then anyway. I couldn't afford to do anything else, and I couldn't afford to get around any other way. If you liked walking, you were my friend."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"872"	" Teddy and I walked all over Johannesburg together. I'd walk to Teddy's house and we'd hang out there. Then we'd walk back to my house and hang out there. We'd walk from my house down to the city center, which was like a three-hour hike just to hang out. And then we'd walk all the way back."	"Teddy and I walked all over Johannesburg together. I'd walk to Teddy's house and we'd hang out there. Then we'd walk back to my house and hang out there. We'd walk from my house down to the city center, which was like a three hour hike just to hang out. And then we'd walk all the way back."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"873"	" Friday and Saturday nights, we'd walk to the mall and hang out. The Balfour Park Shopping Mall was a few blocks from my house. It's not a big mall, but it has everything. An arcade, a cinema, restaurants, South Africa's version of Target, South Africa's version of The Gap. Then, once we were at the mall, since we never had any money to shop or watch movies or buy food, we'd just wander around inside."	"Friday and Saturday nights, we'd walk to the mall and hang out. The Balfour Park Shopping Mall was a few blocks from my house. It's not a big mall, but it has everything. An arcade, a cinema, restaurants, South Africa's version of Target, South Africa's version of The Gap. Then, once we were at the mall, since we never had any money to shop or watch movies or buy food, we'd just wander around inside."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"874"	" One night we were at the mall and most of the shops were closed but the cinema was still showing movies so the building was still open. There was the stationery shop that sold greeting cards and magazines and it didn't have a door so when it closed at night there was only a metal gate like a trellis that was pulled across the entrance and padlocked. Walking past the shop Teddy and I realized that if we put our arms through the trellis we could reach this rack of chocolates just inside."	"One night we were at the mall and most of the shops were closed but the cinema was still showing movies so the building was still open. There was the stationery shop that sold greeting cards and magazines and it didn't have a door so when it closed at night there was only a metal gate like a trellis that was pulled across the entrance and padlocked. Walking past the shop Teddy and I realized that if we put our arms through the trellis we could reach this rack of chocolates just inside."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"876"	" We started going back again and again to steal more. We'd wait for the shops to start to close, then we'd go and sit against the gate, acting like we were just hanging out. We'd check to make sure the coast was clear, and then one of us would reach in, grab a chocolate, and drink the whiskey. Reach in, grab a chocolate, drink the rum. Reach in, grab a chocolate, drink the brandy. We did this every weekend for at least a month, having the best time. Then we pushed our luck too far."	"We started going back again and again to steal more. We'd wait for the shops to start to close, then we'd go and sit against the gate, acting like we were just hanging out. We'd check to make sure the coast was clear, and then one of us would reach in, grab a chocolate, and drink the whiskey. Reach in, grab a chocolate, drink the rum. Reach in, grab a chocolate, drink the brandy. We did this every weekend for at least a month, having the best time. Then we pushed our luck too far."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"877"	" It was a Saturday night. We were hanging out at the entrance to the stationery shop, leaning up against the gate. I reached in to grab a chocolate, and at that exact moment, a mall cop came around the corner and saw me with my arm in up to my shoulder. I brought my hand out with a bunch of chocolates in it. It was almost like a movie. I saw him. He saw me. His eyes went wide. I tried to walk away, acting natural. Then he shouted out,"	"It was a Saturday night. We were hanging out at the entrance to the stationery shop, leaning up against the gate. I reached in to grab a chocolate, and at that exact moment, a mall cop came around the corner and saw me with my arm in up to my shoulder. I brought my hand out with a bunch of chocolates in it. It was almost like a movie. I saw him. He saw me. His eyes went wide. I tried to walk away, acting natural. Then he shouted out,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.001"	" and the chase was on."	"and the chase was on."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.002"	" We bolted, heading for the doors."	"We bolted, heading for the doors."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.004"	" We cleared the exits."	"We cleared the exits."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.005"	" The second we hit the parking lot, more cops were coming at us from every direction."	"The second we hit the parking lot, more cops were coming at us from every direction."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.006"	" A dozen of them, at least."	"A dozen of them, at least."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.007"	" I was running with my head down."	"I was running with my head down."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.009"	" I was in that more all the time."	"I was in that more all the time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.010"	" The gods knew my mom too."	"The gods knew my mom too."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.011"	" She did her banking at that time."	"She did her banking at that time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.012"	" if they even caught a glimpse of who I was."	"if they even caught a glimpse of who I was."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.014"	" We ran straight across the parking lot, ducking and weaving between parked cars"	"We ran straight across the parking lot, ducking and weaving between parked cars."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.015"	" the guards right behind us yelling. We made it to the petrol station outside the road, ran through there and hooked left up the main road."	"the guards right behind us yelling. We made it to the petrol station outside the road, ran through there and hooked left up the main road."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.016"	" They chased and chased and we ran and ran and it was awesome."	"They chased and chased and we ran and ran and it was awesome."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.017"	" The risk of getting caught was half the fun of being naughty."	"The risk of getting caught was half the fun of being naughty."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.019"	" This was my turf. This was my neighborhood."	"This was my turf. This was my neighborhood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.020"	" You couldn't catch me in my neighborhood?"	"You couldn't catch me in my neighborhood?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.021"	" I knew every alley and every street, every back wall to climb over, every fence with a gap big enough to slip through."	"I knew every alley and every street, every back wall to climb over, every fence with a gap big enough to slip through."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.022"	" I knew every shortcut you could possibly imagine."	"I knew every shortcut you could possibly imagine."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.024"	" You know, in case shit went down."	"You know, in case shit went down."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.025"	" In reality, I was a nerdy kid with almost no friends. But in my mind, I was an important and dangerous man."	"In reality, I was a nerdy kid with almost no friends. But in my mind, I was an important and dangerous man."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.026"	" who needed to know where every camera was and where all the exit points were."	"who needed to know where every camera was and where all the exit points were."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.027"	" I knew we couldn't run forever. We needed a plan."	"I knew we couldn't run forever. We needed a plan."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.029"	" I knew that there was a hole in the fence to squeeze through, and on the far side was an empty field behind the mall that took you back to the main road and back to my house."	"I knew that there was a hole in the fence to squeeze through, and on the far side was an empty field behind the mall that took you back to the main road and back to my house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.030"	" A grown-up couldn't fit through the hole, but a kid could."	"A grown up couldn't fit through the hole, but a kid could."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.031"	" All my years of imagining the life of a secret agent for myself finally paid off."	"All my years of imagining the life of a secret agent for myself finally paid off."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.032"	" Now that I needed an escape, I had one."	"Now that I needed an escape, I had one."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.034"	" No, it's a dead end!"	"No, it's a dead end!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.035"	" We can get through, follow me!"	"We can get through, follow me!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.036"	" He didn't."	"He didn't."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.037"	" I turned and ran into the dead end. Teddy broke the other way."	"I turned and ran into the dead end. Teddy broke the other way."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.039"	" Hoff followed me."	"Hoff followed me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.040"	" I got to the fence and knew exactly how to squirm through."	"I got to the fence and knew exactly how to squirm through."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.041"	" Head, then shoulder, one leg, then twist, then the other leg, done. I was through. The guards hit the fence behind me and couldn't follow. I ran across the field to a fence on the far side, popped through there, and then I was right on the road, three blocks from my house."	"Head, then shoulder, one leg, then twist, then the other leg, done. I was through. The guards hit the fence behind me and couldn't follow. I ran across the field to a fence on the far side, popped through there, and then I was right on the road, three blocks from my house."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"878.042"	" I slipped my hands into my pockets and casually walked home."	"I slipped my hands into my pockets and casually walked home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"879"	" Once I got back to my house, I waited for Teddy. He didn't show up."	"Once I got back to my house, I waited for Teddy. He didn't show up."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"88"	" He sped off. He was driving fast, and he wasn't stopping. Only slowing down to check for traffic at the intersections before speeding through."	"He sped off. He was driving fast, and he wasn't stopping. Only slowing down to check for traffic at the intersections before speeding through."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"880"	" I waited 30 minutes, 40 minutes, an hour. No Teddy. Fuck. I ran to Teddy's house in Lynxfield."	"I waited  thirty  minutes,  forty  minutes, an hour. No Teddy. Fuck. I ran to Teddy's house in Lynxfield."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"881"	" No teddy. Monday morning, I went to school. Still no teddy. Fuck!"	"No teddy. Monday morning, I went to school. Still no teddy. Fuck!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"883"	" After school I went home and checked at my house again. Nothing. Teddy's house again. Nothing. Then I ran back home."	"After school I went home and checked at my house again. Nothing. Teddy's house again. Nothing. Then I ran back home."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"884"	" An hour later, Teddy's parents showed up. My mom greeted them at the door."	"An hour later, Teddy's parents showed up. My mom greeted them at the door."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"885"	" Teddy's been arrested for shoplifting, they said."	"Teddy's been arrested for shoplifting, they said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"886"	" Fuck! I eavesdropped on their whole conversation from the other room. From the start, my mom was certain I was involved."	"Fuck! I eavesdropped on their whole conversation from the other room. From the start, my mom was certain I was involved."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"888"	" What? I played dumb. No, that's crazy. I can't believe it. Teddy? No! Where were you? my mom asked. I was at home. But you're always with Teddy. I shrugged. Not on this occasion, I suppose."	"What? I played dumb. No, that's crazy. I can't believe it. Teddy? No! Where were you? my mom asked. I was at home. But you're always with Teddy. I shrugged. Not on this occasion, I suppose."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"889"	" For a moment, my mom thought she'd caught me red-handed, but Teddy had given me a solid alibi. I went back to my room, thinking I was in the clear."	"For a moment, my mom thought she'd caught me red handed, but Teddy had given me a solid alibi. I went back to my room, thinking I was in the clear."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"89"	" Death was never far away from anybody back then."	"Death was never far away from anybody back then."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"890"	" The next day, I was in class and my name was called over the PA system. Trevor Noah, report to the principal's office. All the kids were like, oooooo. The announcements could be heard in every classroom. So now, collectively, the whole school knew I was in trouble. I got up and walked to the office and waited anxiously on an uncomfortable wooden bench outside the door."	"The next day, I was in class and my name was called over the PA system. Trevor Noah, report to the principal's office. All the kids were like, oooooo. The announcements could be heard in every classroom. So now, collectively, the whole school knew I was in trouble. I got up and walked to the office and waited anxiously on an uncomfortable wooden bench outside the door."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"892"	" waiting inside his office, was the head of mall security, two uniformed police officers, and my and Teddy's homeroom teacher, Mrs. Foster. A room full of silent, stone-faced white authority figures stood over me, the guilty young black man. My heart was pounding. I took a seat. Trevor, I don't know if you know any of this, Mr. Friedman said. But Teddy was arrested the other day. What? I played the whole thing again."	"waiting inside his office, was the head of mall security, two uniformed police officers, and my and Teddy's homeroom teacher, Mrs. Foster. A room full of silent, stone faced white authority figures stood over me, the guilty young black man. My heart was pounding. I took a seat. Trevor, I don't know if you know any of this, Mr. Friedman said. But Teddy was arrested the other day. What? I played the whole thing again."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"893"	" For shoplifting, he's been expelled and he won't be coming back to school."	"For shoplifting, he's been expelled and he won't be coming back to school."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"894"	" We know there was another boy involved and these officers are going around to the schools in the area to investigate. We called you here because Mrs. Forster tells us you're Teddy's best friend and we want to know, do you know anything about this? I shook my head."	"We know there was another boy involved and these officers are going around to the schools in the area to investigate. We called you here because Mrs. Forster tells us you're Teddy's best friend and we want to know, do you know anything about this? I shook my head."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"895"	" No, I don't know anything. Do you know who Teddy was with? No."	"No, I don't know anything. Do you know who Teddy was with? No."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"897"	" Well, life, it's been fun, I thought. I'm gonna get expelled, I'm going to go to jail, this is it."	"Well, life, it's been fun, I thought. I'm gonna get expelled, I'm going to go to jail, this is it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"898"	" Mr. Friedman pressed play on the VCR. The tape started."	"Mr. Friedman pressed play on the VCR. The tape started."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"899"	" It was grainy, black and white security camera footage. But you could see what was happening plain as day. They even had it from multiple angles. Me and Teddy reaching through the gates. Me and Teddy racing for the door. They had the whole thing."	"It was grainy, black and white security camera footage. But you could see what was happening plain as day. They even had it from multiple angles. Me and Teddy reaching through the gates. Me and Teddy racing for the door. They had the whole thing."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"9.1"	" At the time, black South Africans outnumbered white South Africans nearly five to one."	"At the time, black South Africans outnumbered white South Africans nearly five to one."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"9.3"	" Zulu, Hasa, Duana, Sichu, Venda, Dabele, Tzonga, Peri and more."	"Zulu, Hasa, Duana, Sichu, Venda, Dabele, Tzonga, Peri and more."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"9"	" I was in that more all the time."	"I was in that more all the time."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"90"	" At that point, my mother could be raped, we could be killed. These were all viable options. I didn't fully comprehend the danger we were in at the moment. I was so tired that I just wanted to sleep. Plus, my mom stayed very calm. She didn't panic. So I didn't know to panic. She just kept trying to reason with him."	"At that point, my mother could be raped, we could be killed. These were all viable options. I didn't fully comprehend the danger we were in at the moment. I was so tired that I just wanted to sleep. Plus, my mom stayed very calm. She didn't panic. So I didn't know to panic. She just kept trying to reason with him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"900"	" After a few seconds, Mr. Friedman reached up and paused it with me from a few meters out, freeze-framed in the middle of the screen. In my mind, this was when he was going to turn to me and say, now would you like to confess? He didn't. Trevor, he said."	"After a few seconds, Mr. Friedman reached up and paused it with me from a few meters out, freeze framed in the middle of the screen. In my mind, this was when he was going to turn to me and say, now would you like to confess? He didn't. Trevor, he said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"902"	" I nearly shat myself. What? I looked at the screen and I realized. Teddy was dark. I am light. I have olive skin. But the camera can't expose for light and dark at the same time. So when you put me on a black and white screen next to a black person, the camera doesn't know what to do. If the camera has to pick, it picks me as white. My color gets blown out. In this video, there was a black person and a white person."	"I nearly shat myself. What? I looked at the screen and I realized. Teddy was dark. I am light. I have olive skin. But the camera can't expose for light and dark at the same time. So when you put me on a black and white screen next to a black person, the camera doesn't know what to do. If the camera has to pick, it picks me as white. My color gets blown out. In this video, there was a black person and a white person."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"903"	" At a certain point, Mrs. Forster just started running through a list of all the white kids she thought it could be. Is it David? No. Rian? No. Frederick? No. I kept waiting for it to be a trick for them to turn and say, it's you! They didn't. At a certain point, I felt so invisible, I almost wanted to take credit. I wanted to jump up and point at the TV and say, are you people blind? That's me."	"At a certain point, Mrs. Forster just started running through a list of all the white kids she thought it could be. Is it David? No. Rian? No. Frederick? No. I kept waiting for it to be a trick for them to turn and say, it's you! They didn't. At a certain point, I felt so invisible, I almost wanted to take credit. I wanted to jump up and point at the TV and say, are you people blind? That's me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"904"	" Eventually, they sent me back to class. I spent the rest of the day and the next couple of weeks waiting for the other shooter drop. Waiting for my mom to get the call. We've got him! We figured it out! But the call never came."	"Eventually, they sent me back to class. I spent the rest of the day and the next couple of weeks waiting for the other shooter drop. Waiting for my mom to get the call. We've got him! We figured it out! But the call never came."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"905"	" South Africa has 11 official languages. After democracy came, people said, okay, how do we create order without having different groups feel like they've been left out of power again?"	"South Africa has  eleven  official languages. After democracy came, people said, okay, how do we create order without having different groups feel like they've been left out of power again?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"907"	" Of the African languages, Zulu has the largest number of native speakers. But we couldn't keep that without also having Khosa, Antwana and Ndebele. There's also Swazi, Tonga, Venda, Sootu and Bedi. We tried to keep all the major groups happy. So the next thing we knew, we'd made 11 languages official languages. And those are just the languages big enough to demand recognition. There are dozens more. It's the Tower of Babel in South Africa."	"Of the African languages, Zulu has the largest number of native speakers. But we couldn't keep that without also having Khosa, Antwana and Ndebele. There's also Swazi, Tonga, Venda, Sootu and Bedi. We tried to keep all the major groups happy. So the next thing we knew, we'd made  eleven  languages official languages. And those are just the languages big enough to demand recognition. There are dozens more. It's the Tower of Babel in South Africa."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"908"	" You'll be at a party with a dozen people, where bits of conversation are flying by in two or three different languages. You'll miss part of it. Someone might translate on the fly to give you the gist. You pick up the rest from the context and you just figure it out. The crazy thing is that somehow it works. Society functions. Except when it doesn't."	"You'll be at a party with a dozen people, where bits of conversation are flying by in two or three different languages. You'll miss part of it. Someone might translate on the fly to give you the gist. You pick up the rest from the context and you just figure it out. The crazy thing is that somehow it works. Society functions. Except when it doesn't."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"909"	" A young man's long, awkward, occasionally tragic and frequently humiliating education in affairs of the heart. Part 3. The Dance."	"A young man's long, awkward, occasionally tragic and frequently humiliating education in affairs of the heart. Part  three . The Dance."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"91"	" I'm sorry if we've upset you, booty. You can just let us out here. No. Really, it's fine. We can just walk. No."	"I'm sorry if we've upset you, booty. You can just let us out here. No. Really, it's fine. We can just walk. No."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"911"	" Thanks to the computer, the internet and the fortunate gift of a CD writer from a friend, I was in business. I had carved out my niche and was having a great time. Life was so good as an outsider that I didn't even think about dating. The only girls in my life were the naked ones with my computer."	"Thanks to the computer, the internet and the fortunate gift of a CD writer from a friend, I was in business. I had carved out my niche and was having a great time. Life was so good as an outsider that I didn't even think about dating. The only girls in my life were the naked ones with my computer."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"912"	" While I downloaded music and messed around in chat rooms, I'd dabble in porn sites, here and there. No video, of course. Only pictures. With online porn today, you just drop straight into the madness. But with dial-up, it took so long for the images to load. It was almost gentlemanly compared to now. You'd spend a good five minutes looking at her face, getting to know her as a person. Then, a few minutes later, you'd get some boobs. By the time you got to her vagina, you'd spend"	"While I downloaded music and messed around in chat rooms, I'd dabble in porn sites, here and there. No video, of course. Only pictures. With online porn today, you just drop straight into the madness. But with dial up, it took so long for the images to load. It was almost gentlemanly compared to now. You'd spend a good five minutes looking at her face, getting to know her as a person. Then, a few minutes later, you'd get some boobs. By the time you got to her vagina, you'd spend."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"913"	" In September of grade 12, the matric dance was coming up. Senior prom. This was the big one. I was again faced with the dilemma of Valentine's Day, confronting another strange ritual I did not understand. All I knew about prom was that, according to my American movies, prom is where it happens. You lose your virginity. You go and you ride in the limousine and then you and the girl do the thing. That was literally"	"In September of grade  twelve , the matric dance was coming up. Senior prom. This was the big one. I was again faced with the dilemma of Valentine's Day, confronting another strange ritual I did not understand. All I knew about prom was that, according to my American movies, prom is where it happens. You lose your virginity. You go and you ride in the limousine and then you and the girl do the thing. That was literally."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"914"	" I'd assumed I wouldn't be going. Or if I did go, it wouldn't be with a date."	"I'd assumed I wouldn't be going. Or if I did go, it wouldn't be with a date."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"916"	" Tom was a chatterbox, hyperactive and go-go-go. He was a real hustler too, always trying to cut a deal, work an angle. He could get people to do anything. A great guy, but fucking crazy and a complete liar as well. I went with him once to Haman Skrall, a settlement that was like a homeland, but not really. Haman Skrall, as its Afrikaans name suggests, was the kraal of Haman, what used to be a white man's farm. The proper homelands,"	"Tom was a chatterbox, hyperactive and go go go. He was a real hustler too, always trying to cut a deal, work an angle. He could get people to do anything. A great guy, but fucking crazy and a complete liar as well. I went with him once to Haman Skrall, a settlement that was like a homeland, but not really. Haman Skrall, as its Afrikaans name suggests, was the kraal of Haman, what used to be a white man's farm. The proper homelands,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"917"	" Hamanskral and settlements like it were empty places on the map where deported black people had been relocated. That's what the government did. They would find some patch of arid, dusty, useless land and dig row after row of holes in the ground. A thousand latrines to serve four thousand families. Then they'd forcibly remove people from illegally occupying some white area and drop them off in the middle of nowhere with some pallets of plywood and corrugated iron."	"Hamanskral and settlements like it were empty places on the map where deported black people had been relocated. That's what the government did. They would find some patch of arid, dusty, useless land and dig row after row of holes in the ground. A thousand latrines to serve four thousand families. Then they'd forcibly remove people from illegally occupying some white area and drop them off in the middle of nowhere with some pallets of plywood and corrugated iron."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"918"	" One afternoon in Hammersprull, Tom told me we were going to see a talent show. At the time, I had a pair of Timberland boots I had bought. They were the only decent pair of clothing I owned. Back then, almost no one in South Africa had Timberlands. They were impossible to get, but everyone wanted them because American rappers wore them. I'd scrimped and saved my tuxrop money and my CD money to buy them."	"One afternoon in Hammersprull, Tom told me we were going to see a talent show. At the time, I had a pair of Timberland boots I had bought. They were the only decent pair of clothing I owned. Back then, almost no one in South Africa had Timberlands. They were impossible to get, but everyone wanted them because American rappers wore them. I'd scrimped and saved my tuxrop money and my CD money to buy them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"919"	" As we were leaving, Tom told me, be sure to wear your timberlands."	"As we were leaving, Tom told me, be sure to wear your timberlands."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"920"	" The talent show was in this little community hall, attached to nothing in the middle of nowhere. When we got there, Tom was going around, shaking hands, chatting with everybody. There was singing, dancing, some poetry. Then the host got up on stage and said,"	"The talent show was in this little community hall, attached to nothing in the middle of nowhere. When we got there, Tom was going around, shaking hands, chatting with everybody. There was singing, dancing, some poetry. Then the host got up on stage and said,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"921"	" Spliffstar was Buster Rhimes' hype man at the time. I sat there confused. What? Spliffstar? In Hammond's crawl? Then everyone in the room turned and looked at me. Tom walked over and whispered in my ear. Dude, come up on stage. What? Come on stage. Dude, what are you talking about? Dude, please. You're gonna get me in so much shit. They've already paid me the money."	"Spliffstar was Buster Rhimes' hype man at the time. I sat there confused. What? Spliffstar? In Hammond's crawl? Then everyone in the room turned and looked at me. Tom walked over and whispered in my ear. Dude, come up on stage. What? Come on stage. Dude, what are you talking about? Dude, please. You're gonna get me in so much shit. They've already paid me the money."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"922"	" Money. What money? Of course, what Tom had failed to tell me was that he'd told these people he was bringing a famous rapper from America to come and rap in their talent show. He had demanded to be paid upfront for doing so. And I, in my timberlands, was that famous American rapper."	"Money. What money? Of course, what Tom had failed to tell me was that he'd told these people he was bringing a famous rapper from America to come and rap in their talent show. He had demanded to be paid upfront for doing so. And I, in my timberlands, was that famous American rapper."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"923"	" So, that's Tom."	"So, that's Tom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"925"	" The dance was still two months away. I promptly forgot about Tom and his ridiculous deal."	"The dance was still two months away. I promptly forgot about Tom and his ridiculous deal."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"926"	" Then he came over to my house one afternoon and popped his head into my room. I found the girl."	"Then he came over to my house one afternoon and popped his head into my room. I found the girl."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"927"	" Really? Yeah, you have to come and meet her."	"Really? Yeah, you have to come and meet her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"928"	" I knew Tom was full of shit, but the thing that makes a con man successful is that he never gives you nothing. He delivers just enough to keep you believing. Tom had introduced me to many beautiful women. He was never dating them, but he talked a good game and was always around them. So when he said he had a girl, I didn't doubt him."	"I knew Tom was full of shit, but the thing that makes a con man successful is that he never gives you nothing. He delivers just enough to keep you believing. Tom had introduced me to many beautiful women. He was never dating them, but he talked a good game and was always around them. So when he said he had a girl, I didn't doubt him."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"93"	" I didn't hear a word of what she was saying, because by that point I'd completely nodded off."	"I didn't hear a word of what she was saying, because by that point I'd completely nodded off."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"930"	" The girl lived in a run-down block of flats downtown. We found her building, and a girl leaned over the balcony and waved us inside. That was the girl's sister, Lerato, Tom said. Come to find out, he'd been trying to get with Lerato, and setting me up with the sister was his way in. Of course, Tom was working an angle."	"The girl lived in a run down block of flats downtown. We found her building, and a girl leaned over the balcony and waved us inside. That was the girl's sister, Lerato, Tom said. Come to find out, he'd been trying to get with Lerato, and setting me up with the sister was his way in. Of course, Tom was working an angle."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"931"	" It was dark in the lobby, the elevator was busted, so we walked up several flights. This girl Lirato brought us into the flat. In the living room was this giant, but I mean really, really enormous fat woman. I was like, oh, Tom, I see what you've done here. Nicely played. Tom was a big joker as well. Is this my date? I asked. No, no, no. He said, this is not your date."	"It was dark in the lobby, the elevator was busted, so we walked up several flights. This girl Lirato brought us into the flat. In the living room was this giant, but I mean really, really enormous fat woman. I was like, oh, Tom, I see what you've done here. Nicely played. Tom was a big joker as well. Is this my date? I asked. No, no, no. He said, this is not your date."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"932"	" We waited, chatted with the older sister. Ten minutes later the door opened, and the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my life walked in. She was"	"We waited, chatted with the older sister. Ten minutes later the door opened, and the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my life walked in. She was."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"934"	" No girl at my high school looked anything like her."	"No girl at my high school looked anything like her."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"935"	" Hi, she said."	"Hi, she said."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"936"	" High, I replied."	"High, I replied."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"937"	" I was dumbfounded."	"I was dumbfounded."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"939"	" We walked out of that building and I was the happiest man on earth. I couldn't believe it. I was the guy at school who couldn't get a date. I'd resigned myself to never getting a date. Didn't consider myself worthy of having a date. But now I was going to the matric dance with the most beautiful girl in the world."	"We walked out of that building and I was the happiest man on earth. I couldn't believe it. I was the guy at school who couldn't get a date. I'd resigned myself to never getting a date. Didn't consider myself worthy of having a date. But now I was going to the matric dance with the most beautiful girl in the world."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"94"	" When we came to the next traffic light, the driver eased off the gas a bit to look around and check the road. My mother reached over, pulled the sliding door open, grabbed me and threw me out as far as she could. Then she took Andrew, curled herself in a ball around him and leaped out behind me. It felt like a dream until the pain hit. BAM! I smacked hard on the pavement. My mother landed right beside me and we tumbled and tumbled and rolled and rolled. I was wide awake now."	"When we came to the next traffic light, the driver eased off the gas a bit to look around and check the road. My mother reached over, pulled the sliding door open, grabbed me and threw me out as far as she could. Then she took Andrew, curled herself in a ball around him and leaped out behind me. It felt like a dream until the pain hit. BAM! I smacked hard on the pavement. My mother landed right beside me and we tumbled and tumbled and rolled and rolled. I was wide awake now."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"940"	" Over the following weeks, we went down to Hillbrow a few more times to hang out with Babiki and her sisters and her friends. Babiki's family was Bedi, one of South Africa's smaller tribes. I liked getting to know people of different backgrounds, so that was fun. Babiki and her friends were what we call amabujwa. They're as poor as most other black people, but they try to act like they're not. They dress fashionably and act rich. Amabujwa will put a shirt on layaway."	"Over the following weeks, we went down to Hillbrow a few more times to hang out with Babiki and her sisters and her friends. Babiki's family was Bedi, one of South Africa's smaller tribes. I liked getting to know people of different backgrounds, so that was fun. Babiki and her friends were what we call amabujwa. They're as poor as most other black people, but they try to act like they're not. They dress fashionably and act rich. Amabujwa will put a shirt on layaway."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"941"	" Babiki and I never went on a date alone. It was always the two of us in a group. She was shy, and I was a nervous wreck most of the time. But we had fun. Tom kept everyone loose and having a good time. Whenever we'd say goodbye, Babiki would give me a hug, and once, she even gave me a little kiss. I was in heaven. I was like, yeah! I've got a girlfriend! Cool!"	"Babiki and I never went on a date alone. It was always the two of us in a group. She was shy, and I was a nervous wreck most of the time. But we had fun. Tom kept everyone loose and having a good time. Whenever we'd say goodbye, Babiki would give me a hug, and once, she even gave me a little kiss. I was in heaven. I was like, yeah! I've got a girlfriend! Cool!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"943"	" We'd moved to Highlands North when my stepfather's garage went out of business, and he moved his workshop to the house. We had a big yard and a garage in the back, and that became his new workshop, essentially. At any given time, we had at least 10 or 15 cars in the driveway, in the yard, and out in the street, clients' cars being worked on and old junkers able kept around to tinker with."	"We'd moved to Highlands North when my stepfather's garage went out of business, and he moved his workshop to the house. We had a big yard and a garage in the back, and that became his new workshop, essentially. At any given time, we had at least  ten  or  fifteen  cars in the driveway, in the yard, and out in the street, clients' cars being worked on and old junkers able kept around to tinker with."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"944"	" One afternoon, Tom and I were at the house. Tom was telling Abel about my date, and Abel decided to be generous. He said, I could take a car for the dance. There was a red Mazda that we'd had for a while. A complete piece of shit, but it worked well enough. I'd borrowed it before, but the car I really wanted was Abel's BMW. It was old and beat up like the Mazda, but a shit BMW is still a BMW. I begged him to let me"	"One afternoon, Tom and I were at the house. Tom was telling Abel about my date, and Abel decided to be generous. He said, I could take a car for the dance. There was a red Mazda that we'd had for a while. A complete piece of shit, but it worked well enough. I'd borrowed it before, but the car I really wanted was Abel's BMW. It was old and beat up like the Mazda, but a shit BMW is still a BMW. I begged him to let me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"945"	" We went to Babiki's flat, told her my parents wanted to meet her, and brought her back to my house. Then we brought her around to the garage in the back where Abel and his guys were working. Tom and I went over and introduced them. Abel, this is Babiki. Babiki, this is Abel. Abel smiled big, was charming as always. Nice to meet you, he said. They chatted for a few minutes. Tom and Babiki left. Abel turned to me. Is that the girl?"	"We went to Babiki's flat, told her my parents wanted to meet her, and brought her back to my house. Then we brought her around to the garage in the back where Abel and his guys were working. Tom and I went over and introduced them. Abel, this is Babiki. Babiki, this is Abel. Abel smiled big, was charming as always. Nice to meet you, he said. They chatted for a few minutes. Tom and Babiki left. Abel turned to me. Is that the girl?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"946"	" Once I had the car, I desperately needed something to wear. I was taking out this girl who was really into fashion and, except for my timberlands, everything I owned was shit. I was limited in my wardrobe choices because I was stuck buying in the shops my mother let me go to, and my mother did not believe in spending money on clothes. She'd take me to some bargain clothing store and tell me what our budget was, and I'd have to find something to wear."	"Once I had the car, I desperately needed something to wear. I was taking out this girl who was really into fashion and, except for my timberlands, everything I owned was shit. I was limited in my wardrobe choices because I was stuck buying in the shops my mother let me go to, and my mother did not believe in spending money on clothes. She'd take me to some bargain clothing store and tell me what our budget was, and I'd have to find something to wear."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"948"	" Bongani, the other middleman from my seedy business, found out I had a date, and he made it his mission to give me a makeover. You need to up your game, he said. You cannot go to the dance looking the way you look. For her sake, not yours. Let's go shopping."	"Bongani, the other middleman from my seedy business, found out I had a date, and he made it his mission to give me a makeover. You need to up your game, he said. You cannot go to the dance looking the way you look. For her sake, not yours. Let's go shopping."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"949"	" I went to my mom and begged her to give me money to buy something to wear for the dance. She finally relented and gave me 2000 rand for one outfit. It was the most money she'd ever given me for anything in my life. I told Bongani how much I had to spend and he said we'd make it work. The trick to looking rich, he told me, is to have one expensive item and for the rest of the things you get basic good-looking quality stuff. The nice item will draw everything"	"I went to my mom and begged her to give me money to buy something to wear for the dance. She finally relented and gave me  two thousand  rand for one outfit. It was the most money she'd ever given me for anything in my life. I told Bongani how much I had to spend and he said we'd make it work. The trick to looking rich, he told me, is to have one expensive item and for the rest of the things you get basic good looking quality stuff. The nice item will draw everything."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"95"	" It's weird to explain, but I just knew what to do. It was animal instinct. Learned in a world where violence was always lurking and waiting to erupt. In the townships, when the police came swooping in with their riot gear and armored cars and helicopters, I knew. Run for cover. Run and hide. I knew that as a five-year-old. Had I lived a different life, getting thrown out of a speeding minibus might have fazed me. I'd have stood there like an idiot going, what's happening, mom? Why are my legs so sore?"	"It's weird to explain, but I just knew what to do. It was animal instinct. Learned in a world where violence was always lurking and waiting to erupt. In the townships, when the police came swooping in with their riot gear and armored cars and helicopters, I knew. Run for cover. Run and hide. I knew that as a five year old. Had I lived a different life, getting thrown out of a speeding minibus might have fazed me. I'd have stood there like an idiot going, what's happening, mom? Why are my legs so sore?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"950"	" In my mind, nothing was cooler than the leather coats everybody wore in The Matrix. The Matrix came out while I was in high school, and it was my favorite movie at the time. I loved Neo. In my heart, I knew I am Neo. He's a nerd. He's useless at everything, but secretly, he's a badass superhero. All I needed was a bald, mysterious black man to come into my life and show me the way."	"In my mind, nothing was cooler than the leather coats everybody wore in The Matrix. The Matrix came out while I was in high school, and it was my favorite movie at the time. I loved Neo. In my heart, I knew I am Neo. He's a nerd. He's useless at everything, but secretly, he's a badass superhero. All I needed was a bald, mysterious black man to come into my life and show me the way."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"952"	" Once we had the outfit, Bongani took a long look at my enormous afro. I was forever trying to get the perfect 1970s Michael Jackson afro. What I had was more buckwheat, unruly and impossible to comb, like stabbing a pitchfork into a bed of crabgrass. We need to fix that fucking hair, Bongani said. What do you mean? I said, this is just my hair. No, we have to do something."	"Once we had the outfit, Bongani took a long look at my enormous afro. I was forever trying to get the perfect  one thousand, nine hundred and seventy s Michael Jackson afro. What I had was more buckwheat, unruly and impossible to comb, like stabbing a pitchfork into a bed of crabgrass. We need to fix that fucking hair, Bongani said. What do you mean? I said, this is just my hair. No, we have to do something."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"953"	" Bongani lived in Alexandra. He dragged me there and we went to talk to some girls from his street who were hanging out on the corner. What would you do with this guy's hair? He asked them. The girls looked me over. He has so much, one of them said. Why doesn't he conrow it? Shit, yeah, they said. That's great. I said what? Conrows? No. No, no, they said. Do it."	"Bongani lived in Alexandra. He dragged me there and we went to talk to some girls from his street who were hanging out on the corner. What would you do with this guy's hair? He asked them. The girls looked me over. He has so much, one of them said. Why doesn't he conrow it? Shit, yeah, they said. That's great. I said what? Conrows? No. No, no, they said. Do it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"954"	" Bongani dragged me to a hair salon down the street. We went in and sat down. The woman touched my hair, shook her head and turned to Bongani. I can't work with this sheep, she said. You have to do something about this. What do we need to do? You have to relax it. I don't do that here."	"Bongani dragged me to a hair salon down the street. We went in and sat down. The woman touched my hair, shook her head and turned to Bongani. I can't work with this sheep, she said. You have to do something about this. What do we need to do? You have to relax it. I don't do that here."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"955"	" Okay."	"Okay."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"957"	" Once my hair was full of the relaxer, she told me, you have to try keep it in for as long as possible. It's going to start burning. When it starts burning, tell me and we'll rinse it out. But the longer you can handle it, the straighter your hair will become."	"Once my hair was full of the relaxer, she told me, you have to try keep it in for as long as possible. It's going to start burning. When it starts burning, tell me and we'll rinse it out. But the longer you can handle it, the straighter your hair will become."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"958"	" I wanted to do it right. So I sat in the chair and waited and waited for as long as I could."	"I wanted to do it right. So I sat in the chair and waited and waited for as long as I could."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"959"	" I waited too long."	"I waited too long."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"96"	" The men stopped the minibus and got out and tried to chase us, but they didn't stand a chance. We smoked them. I think they were in shock. I still remember glancing back and seeing them give up with a look of utter bewilderment on their faces. What just happened? Who'd have thought a woman with two small children could run so fast? They didn't know they were dealing with the reigning champs of the Maryvale College Sports Day. We kept going and going until we made it"	"The men stopped the minibus and got out and tried to chase us, but they didn't stand a chance. We smoked them. I think they were in shock. I still remember glancing back and seeing them give up with a look of utter bewilderment on their faces. What just happened? Who'd have thought a woman with two small children could run so fast? They didn't know they were dealing with the reigning champs of the Maryvale College Sports Day. We kept going and going until we made it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"961"	" When she was done, I had patches of acid burns all over my scalp."	"When she was done, I had patches of acid burns all over my scalp."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"962"	" I was the only man in the salon. It was all women. It was a window into what women experience to look good on a regular basis. Why would they ever do this? I thought. This is horrible. But it worked. My hair was completely straight. The woman combed it back and I looked like a pimp. A pimp named Slickback."	"I was the only man in the salon. It was all women. It was a window into what women experience to look good on a regular basis. Why would they ever do this? I thought. This is horrible. But it worked. My hair was completely straight. The woman combed it back and I looked like a pimp. A pimp named Slickback."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"963"	" Bongani then dragged me back to the first salon and the woman agreed to conroll my hair. She worked slowly. It took six hours. Finally she said, okay, you can look in the mirror."	"Bongani then dragged me back to the first salon and the woman agreed to conroll my hair. She worked slowly. It took six hours. Finally she said, okay, you can look in the mirror."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"964"	" She turned me around in the chair and I looked in the mirror and I had never seen myself like that before."	"She turned me around in the chair and I looked in the mirror and I had never seen myself like that before."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"966"	" I went home and my mom squealed when I walked in the door. Ooooooh! They turned my baby boy into a pretty little girl. I've got a little girl, you're so pretty! Mom, come on, stop it! Is this the way you're telling me that you're gay? What? No. Why would you say that? You know it's okay if you are. No, Mom, I'm not gay."	"I went home and my mom squealed when I walked in the door. Ooooooh! They turned my baby boy into a pretty little girl. I've got a little girl, you're so pretty! Mom, come on, stop it! Is this the way you're telling me that you're gay? What? No. Why would you say that? You know it's okay if you are. No, Mom, I'm not gay."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"967"	" Everyone in my family loved it. They all thought it looked great. My mom did tease the shit out of me though. It's very well done, she said. But it is way too pretty. You do look like a girl."	"Everyone in my family loved it. They all thought it looked great. My mom did tease the shit out of me though. It's very well done, she said. But it is way too pretty. You do look like a girl."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"968"	" The big night finally came. Tom came over to help me get ready. The hair, the clothes, everything came together perfectly. Once I was set, we went to Able to get the keys to the BMW. And that was the moment the whole night started to go wrong."	"The big night finally came. Tom came over to help me get ready. The hair, the clothes, everything came together perfectly. Once I was set, we went to Able to get the keys to the BMW. And that was the moment the whole night started to go wrong."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"969"	" It was a Saturday night, end of the week, which meant Abel was drinking with his workers. I walked out to his garage, and as soon as I saw his eyes, I knew he was wasted. Fuck."	"It was a Saturday night, end of the week, which meant Abel was drinking with his workers. I walked out to his garage, and as soon as I saw his eyes, I knew he was wasted. Fuck."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"970"	" When Abel was drunk, he was a completely different person. Ah, you look nice, he said with a big smile looking me over."	"When Abel was drunk, he was a completely different person. Ah, you look nice, he said with a big smile looking me over."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"971"	" Where are you going? Where am I? Aby, I'm going to the dance."	"Where are you going? Where am I? Aby, I'm going to the dance."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"972"	" Okay, have fun!"	"Okay, have fun!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"973"	" Um, can I get the keys? The keys to watch? To the car?"	"Um, can I get the keys? The keys to watch? To the car?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"975"	" He gave me his car keys. Tom and I drove to the liquor store. I bought Abel a few cases of beer, drove back and unloaded it for him. Okay? I said. Can I have the BMW now? No. What do you mean no? I mean no. I need my car tonight. But you promised. You said I could take it."	"He gave me his car keys. Tom and I drove to the liquor store. I bought Abel a few cases of beer, drove back and unloaded it for him. Okay? I said. Can I have the BMW now? No. What do you mean no? I mean no. I need my car tonight. But you promised. You said I could take it."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"976"	" Yeah, but I need the car."	"Yeah, but I need the car."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"977"	" I was crushed. I sat there with Tom and begged him for close to half an hour. Please, no. Please, nope."	"I was crushed. I sat there with Tom and begged him for close to half an hour. Please, no. Please, nope."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"978"	" Finally we realized it wasn't gonna happen."	"Finally we realized it wasn't gonna happen."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"98"	" So I should have left you there for them to kill you. At least they would have woken me up before they killed me. Back and forth we went. I was too confused and too angry about getting thrown out of the car to realize what had happened. My mother had saved my life."	"So I should have left you there for them to kill you. At least they would have woken me up before they killed me. Back and forth we went. I was too confused and too angry about getting thrown out of the car to realize what had happened. My mother had saved my life."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"980"	" She was even more gorgeous than before, in an amazing red dress, but she was clearly not in a great mood."	"She was even more gorgeous than before, in an amazing red dress, but she was clearly not in a great mood."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"981"	" Inside, I was quietly starting to panic, but I smiled and kept trying my gentlemanly best to be a good date, holding the door for her, telling her how beautiful she was. Tom and the sister gave us a send off and we headed out."	"Inside, I was quietly starting to panic, but I smiled and kept trying my gentlemanly best to be a good date, holding the door for her, telling her how beautiful she was. Tom and the sister gave us a send off and we headed out."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"982"	" Then I got lost. The dance was being held at some venue in a part of town I wasn't familiar with. And at some point, I got completely turned around and had no idea where I was. I drove around for an hour in the dark, going left, going right, doubling back. I was on my cell phone the whole time, desperately calling people, trying to figure out where I was, trying to get directions."	"Then I got lost. The dance was being held at some venue in a part of town I wasn't familiar with. And at some point, I got completely turned around and had no idea where I was. I drove around for an hour in the dark, going left, going right, doubling back. I was on my cell phone the whole time, desperately calling people, trying to figure out where I was, trying to get directions."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"984"	" I finally figured out where I was and we made it to the dance, nearly two hours late. I parked, jumped out and ran around to get her door. When I opened it, she just sat there. Are you ready? I said, let's go in. No, no. What? What do you mean no? No. Okay, but why?"	"I finally figured out where I was and we made it to the dance, nearly two hours late. I parked, jumped out and ran around to get her door. When I opened it, she just sat there. Are you ready? I said, let's go in. No, no. What? What do you mean no? No. Okay, but why?."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"985"	" No! But we need to go inside. The dance is inside."	"No! But we need to go inside. The dance is inside."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"986"	" No!"	"No!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"987"	" I stood there for another 20 minutes, trying to convince her to come inside. But she kept saying no. She wouldn't get out of the car."	"I stood there for another  twenty  minutes, trying to convince her to come inside. But she kept saying no. She wouldn't get out of the car."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"989"	" I ran inside and found Bongani. Where have you been? He said. I'm here but my date's in the car and she won't come in. What do you mean she won't come in? I don't know what's going on. Please help me."	"I ran inside and found Bongani. Where have you been? He said. I'm here but my date's in the car and she won't come in. What do you mean she won't come in? I don't know what's going on. Please help me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"99"	" As we caught our breath and waited for the police to come and drive us home, she said, well, at least we're safe. Thank God."	"As we caught our breath and waited for the police to come and drive us home, she said, well, at least we're safe. Thank God."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"990"	" We went back out to the parking lot. I took Bongani over to the car. And the second he saw her, he lost it. Jesus in heaven! This is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen! You said she was beautiful, Trevor, but this is insane! In an instant, he completely forgot about helping me with Babiki. He turned, ran back inside, and called to the guys. Guys! You gotta come see this! Trevor got a date! And she's beautiful! Guys, come out here!"	"We went back out to the parking lot. I took Bongani over to the car. And the second he saw her, he lost it. Jesus in heaven! This is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen! You said she was beautiful, Trevor, but this is insane! In an instant, he completely forgot about helping me with Babiki. He turned, ran back inside, and called to the guys. Guys! You gotta come see this! Trevor got a date! And she's beautiful! Guys, come out here!."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"991"	" Babiki sat in the passenger seats, staring straight ahead, refusing to budge. I was outside the car, pacing, stressed out. A friend of mine had a bottle of brandy that he'd smuggled into the dance. Here, he said, have some of this. Nothing mattered at that point, so I started drinking. I'd fucked up. The girl didn't like me. The night was done."	"Babiki sat in the passenger seats, staring straight ahead, refusing to budge. I was outside the car, pacing, stressed out. A friend of mine had a bottle of brandy that he'd smuggled into the dance. Here, he said, have some of this. Nothing mattered at that point, so I started drinking. I'd fucked up. The girl didn't like me. The night was done."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"993"	" After a minute, his head popped up over the car with this confused look."	"After a minute, his head popped up over the car with this confused look."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"994"	" I started flashing back through all the times I'd been with Babiki. Meeting at her flat, hanging out with her friends, introducing her to Abel. Did I talk to her then? No. Did I talk to her then? No. It was like the scene in Fight Club, where Ed Norton's character flashes back and realizes he and Brad Pitt have never been in the same room with Helena Bonham Carter at the same time. He realizes he's been punching himself the whole time. He's Tyler Durden."	"I started flashing back through all the times I'd been with Babiki. Meeting at her flat, hanging out with her friends, introducing her to Abel. Did I talk to her then? No. Did I talk to her then? No. It was like the scene in Fight Club, where Ed Norton's character flashes back and realizes he and Brad Pitt have never been in the same room with Helena Bonham Carter at the same time. He realizes he's been punching himself the whole time. He's Tyler Durden."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"995"	" In all the excitement of meeting Babiki, the times we were hanging out and getting to know each other, we were never actually speaking to each other. It was always through Tom."	"In all the excitement of meeting Babiki, the times we were hanging out and getting to know each other, we were never actually speaking to each other. It was always through Tom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"996"	" Fucking Tom."	"Fucking Tom."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"998"	" Barbiki was so shy that she didn't talk much to begin with and I was so inept with women that I didn't know how to talk to her. I'd never had a girlfriend. I didn't even know what girlfriend meant. Someone put a beautiful woman on my arm and said, she's your girlfriend. I'd been mesmerized by her beauty and just the idea of her. I didn't know I was supposed to talk to her. The naked women on my computer, I'd never had to talk to them, ask them their opinions,"	"Barbiki was so shy that she didn't talk much to begin with and I was so inept with women that I didn't know how to talk to her. I'd never had a girlfriend. I didn't even know what girlfriend meant. Someone put a beautiful woman on my arm and said, she's your girlfriend. I'd been mesmerized by her beauty and just the idea of her. I didn't know I was supposed to talk to her. The naked women on my computer, I'd never had to talk to them, ask them their opinions,."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"999.1"	" All three of Babiki's older sisters spoke English, and her younger sister Lirato spoke a little."	"All three of Babiki's older sisters spoke English, and her younger sister Lirato spoke a little."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"999.2"	" So whenever we hung out with Barbiki and her sisters and their friends, a lot of the conversation was in English. The rest of it was going right by me in bedi or sutu."	"So whenever we hung out with Barbiki and her sisters and their friends, a lot of the conversation was in English. The rest of it was going right by me in bedi or sutu."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"999.3"	" But that's completely normal in South Africa so it never bothered me."	"But that's completely normal in South Africa so it never bothered me."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"999.5"	" And the way my mind works with language, even when I'm hearing other languages, they get filtered into English as I'm hearing them."	"And the way my mind works with language, even when I'm hearing other languages, they get filtered into English as I'm hearing them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"999.6"	" My mind stores them in English."	"My mind stores them in English."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"999.7"	" when my grandmother and great-grandmother were hysterically praying to God to destroy the demon that had shit on their kitchen floor. All of that transpired in Cosa, but it's stored in English. I remember it as English."	"when my grandmother and great grandmother were hysterically praying to God to destroy the demon that had shit on their kitchen floor. All of that transpired in Cosa, but it's stored in English. I remember it as English."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"999.8"	" So whenever I lay in bed at night dreaming about Babiki and the moments we'd spent together I felt like it had transpired in English because that's how I remembered it and Tom had never said anything about what language she spoke or didn't speak because Why would he care? He just wanted to get his free CDs and get with the sister"	"So whenever I lay in bed at night dreaming about Babiki and the moments we'd spent together I felt like it had transpired in English because that's how I remembered it and Tom had never said anything about what language she spoke or didn't speak because Why would he care? He just wanted to get his free CDs and get with the sister."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"
"999"	" All three of Babiki's older sisters spoke English, and her younger sister Lirato spoke a little. So whenever we hung out with Babiki and her sisters and their friends, a lot of the conversation was in English. The rest of it was going right by me in Bedi or Sootu. But that's completely normal in South Africa, so it never bothered me. I got enough of the gist of the conversation from everyone's English to know what was going on. And the way my mind works with language, even when I'm hearing other languages, they get filtered into English as I'm hearing them."	"All three of Babiki's older sisters spoke English, and her younger sister Lirato spoke a little. So whenever we hung out with Babiki and her sisters and their friends, a lot of the conversation was in English. The rest of it was going right by me in Bedi or Sootu. But that's completely normal in South Africa, so it never bothered me. I got enough of the gist of the conversation from everyone's English to know what was going on. And the way my mind works with language, even when I'm hearing other languages, they get filtered into English as I'm hearing them."	1	"train"	"male"	"False"	"None"