The coastland times with which is combined the pilot and herald of Belhaven and Swan Quarter., 1962-06-29
Fridays
Child
BY LAWRENCE MADDRY

MIR. III. F. Lindsay, Morehead
City, sends the following, and
thank him. Only newspaper peo-
pie can appreciate the horror
of such as this, because things
like this really do happen. Any.
how, this way it's funny.
A man with a sewing machine
to sell placed a classified ad in
the newspaper. The ad came out
the next day as follows:
Monday: For Sale: R. D.
Smith has one sewing machine
for sale. Phone 958. Call after
z pm. and ask for Mrs. Kelly
who lives with him cheap.
Tuesday: We regret having
erred in R. D. Smiths ad yes
terday. 1t should have read:
For Sale: r. d. Smith has one
sewing machine for sale. Cheap.
Phone 958 and ask for Mrs.
Kelly who lives with him after
2 pm.
Wednesday: R. D. Smith has
informed us that he has received
several annoying telephone calls
because of an error we made in
his classified ad yesteday. His
ad stands corrected: For Sale:
R. d. Smith has one sewing
machine for sale. Cheap. Phone
958 and ask for Mrs. Kelly who
loves with him.
Thursday: Notice: I, R. d.
Smith have no sewing machine
for sale. / smashed it. Don't call
958, the phone has been taken
out. / have not been carrying
on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yes
terday, she was my housekeeper.
-"Carteret County Times"
"The most runs by one base
ball team in one game is SO by
Chicago (N.L.) in 1897" (Gui-
ness Bood of World Records)
Not that it really makes any
difference one way or the other,
but somehow the information
might take the edge off the 21-5
throttling which the Wanchese
nine handed the Manteo Marvels
on the mound about 10 days
ago.
The score, which is unofficial
in the extreme, varies depending
on the liar being interviewed. l
was at a banquet last Tuesday
and talked to Carlisle Davis for
over two hours before he ad-
mitted having taken part in the
fiasco and he pitched .
for Manteo !
Carlisle says that the score
couldn't have been any worse
than a 1877 drubbing; on the
other hand, I've spoken to sew
eral of the players in Wanchese
who have sworn that the score
was 29-2.
Phillip Tillett, who may be the
biggest you know what I've ever
known, told me with a straight
face and a mouth full of crac-
kers on Tuesday that Manteo
actually won the game with his
tie-breaking homer in the ninth
inning, to a tune of 3-2.
Henry Cheevers was removing
a splinter from his foot when l
cornered him beside his hoe on
Monday afternoon in Goldie
Meekins' yard. He pulled it out
with a flourish, sort of danced
from one foot to the other and,
with big, post-operation smile,
went back to the crab grass.
Henry, Manteo's only colored
mystic, achieved, if you will
remember, a degree of promi-
nence when he reported having
spied a turkey playing a jews
harp, while returning to his
home in the Burnside section at
midnight several months ago.
He is my friend of long stand
ing, but will, on occasion, "shuf-
file the truth satisfactorily" 1t
given half the chance.
Henry chopped at the crab
grass as l stood there watching
the perspiration pop from his
brow like the blisters on a burn
ed pancake. Cheevers is not
much on conversation when he's
working; but on Monday he gave
vent to an apparently long
standing and enthusiastic con-
tempt for his cousin "Coolwater'' =
Stokes, so named because of his
years of shiftless hitch hiking
on the back of ice trucks. A
practice he continues to this day
in New Orleans.
Henry says that Coolwater
has devoted his entire life to do
ing nothing more than keeping
a cool bottom in the summer.
Coolwater has no visible source
of income. He just pops up like
the first bead of perspiration
in the spring, jumps aboard one
of the horse-driven ice carts on