The Catholic times. [volume] (Columbus, Ohio) 1951-current, 1959-05-22
JOSEPH BREIC-
Ice Cubes For
Neighbor Sam

The fellow next door. name of Sam, said: NOW
you'll probably 60 and write an article about it." =
Probably | will, !" | agreed.
1T was Sans brute-strength way of getting ice
out of an ice tray. s
He took the lever in his right hand, gave a terrific
pull, and smashed the ice into bits.
What we got in our drinks was practically crushs
ed ice. Well, shattered ice, anyhow.
"That'S the trouble with men" | told Sam. "They
forget that half their ancestors were women"
What / meant was, there is no reason that a man
shouldn't use a bit of feminine guile when it serves
a purpose. @
sense in overriding it. A man can be. man without
using a sledge hammer to drive in carpet tacks. ~
When next we went to the kitchen, | took the ice
tray out of Sans hands. 'This time" | said firmly,
"Tm having ice cubes in my glass" I
Then ] showed him how to 60 about it.
knew it wouldn't do any gO0d-nOt as far as
changing Sans method was concerned. | have learn
ed from long experience that men won't take the time
and trouble to approach an ice tray with the required
cunning.
Well, at least l would get ice cubes instead of
broken ice, even if | couldn't make a different man
out of Sam. -
iPLAcED the icy tray under the spigot, and ran
warm water on it to cover all the ice cubes.
watch this" / said. So
Then l began my cture-demonstration Y
"What you do is" | said, "you run the warm
water just long enough-not too long. With a bit Of
experience you'll learn the trick. You lift the lever.
but if you encounter resistance from the ice, you wait
a bit longer. Never force things. Getting ice out OF
an ice tray in cube form is like courting-you want
the girl to know you're serious, but your approach Is
gradual, gentle and persuasive"
| gave the lever a tentative tug, and added a bit
more water from the Spig0t. -
"If you rush the girl too much, she'll shy away
| explained. THAT'S the way it is with ice cubes.
Easy does it. You've got to, know how to wait
Let the cubes have time to feel at home with you."e
THE OLDEST PART of it is, | went on, a woman
can't handle ice trays with the right touch, for all her
femininity and gentleness. You'll see why in a mo-
ment, / said.
| tried the lever again, and it yielded to just a
touch Of firmness. l lifted it, and the ice cubes separats
ed neatly. There you are" l told Sam. ice cubes
not s~plintered ice."
'Yeah," said Sam, "but they're floating in water,
'sWatch now -
lifted the aluminium separator away from the
cubes, laid it down, held the cubes in the tray by cover.
ing them with my fingers, tilted the tray so that the
water drained out, and handed Sam a tray filled with
perfect ice cubes.
HE ADMITTED that it was a neat trick. 'But why
can't a woman do it," he wanted to know.
"Her hands aren't large enough" | replied. She
spills the cubes into the sink out of her hands and
~scatters them on the floor" IS
"Well,'' said Sam, II haven't got time for all that
monkey business. When | want ice cubes, / want 'enn
in a hurry
81 know" l said, "That's a typical male reaction.
You won't accept the fact that half your ancestors
we're women, and that therefore you ought to have a
bit of feminine guile in you"
SANS WIFE spoke up at this point. "f you'd use
the Breig method" she said, you wouldn't bend all
the ice tray levers out of shape" ev
II don't do anything of the kind" said Sam.
81 can show you a half dozen bent t%ray-liners In
the basement, if it comes to that" said his wife. Sam
shut up. -
I concluded my lecture. EYES, ! said, "the Breig
system does avoid bending the levers. But what is
much more important, it gets you ice cubes. But I've
never found a mar. I could convince"
"You won't find one around here, that's sure"
said Sans wife. II