Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1959-05-17

1 After an. we don't know what
comes after death. So I decide
to stay here and make the best
Of it."
He paused to let that sink In
and then continued:
Nov, you may md that
through counseling. you viii be
able to share more interests
with your husband. establish a
rapport and be happier or you
may have to learn to live indie
pendent lives in the same
house."
when do we start2" I asked.
We've already started" he
returned. We've gotten to
know a little aout each other"
No Question on Marriage
I figured / knew more about
him than he did about me He
hadn't asked me a single direct
question about my relations
| with my husband, which was
theoretically why ! had come
to a marriage counselor. With
out too much Of an assist from
him, I had tried to convey the
picture of an extremely de-
pressed. jittery person, who
suffered from headaches, had
lost interest in life, had an
emotional block (the hand
writing difficulty and talked Of
suicide. I decided it was time
to give him another little push.
MY husband" / sighed,
says I should 60 to psychia-
trist."
| He bridled visibly.
We'll, Of course" he said
coldly. 'psychiatrists are at
least five times as expensive as
I am. They'll charge you SIS
an hour and want to see you
every day. If somebody is vio-
lently insane. Of course ! would
suggest a psychiatrist. He
would put the person in a men
tai hospital and give him drugs
and things. You don't need
anything like that. You just
need some interests"
Garden Therapy Urged
! He wanted to know if we
own our own home and ever
worked in our garden. I told
him we just let it alone.
Some people," he ventured.
"get a lot of good out of work.
ling together in their garden"
Since I obviously couldn't
have cared less about a Ito
| getherness" lecture, he asked
me about my family. / told
him my mother lived in Chi
cago and my father in Cali
fornia. I expected him to ask
if they were divorced, but he
! didn't. When he asked when
I had last seen my parents. !
told him I had seen my mother
last summer but hadn't seen
my father for years. Again
despite my push-he didn't
pursue the father angle.
! I asked him how long the
treatment would take. He said
lperhaps is daily sessions and
then once a week for some time
! thereafter. When I WINGED at
that. he said maybe 10 sessions
and FASTENED to add:
! you might want to drop out
after the third session. Some
people do. They can't see
that they're getting anywhere.
That's when they should stick.
After about 10 sessions, they
can see results.
Chart Keeping Suggested
Nov. I would suggest that
you start keeping a chart. Begin
| today. At noon, suppertime
and bedtime, mark down how
you feel. If you feel just as
depressed as you do now, put
down zero. If you feel a little
better. put down one, and If
you feel just as good as possible,
put down five. You can look
at the chart and see how you're
improving"
Through this sales talk, /
had been staring at the floor,
shoulders Slumped. Then. !
reused myself to ask what we
would do at tomorrow's session.
"Oh, talk about movies and
books and discuss the problems
they raise" he replied.
I'm not interested in books
and movies right now" / said.
Just in my own problems"
We'll, of course" he said,
I'VE will talk about them" He
had been looking at his watch
periodically and now he an
nounced the interview was over,
that it didn't do to talk about
these problems too long at a
time.
AS I handed over my SIS, I
made one last plCch for psvchi-
atric help. / asked him if he.
had a psychiatrist he consults
with regularly. He acted puz-
zled and said he didn't know
what / meant.
What time do you want to
come tomorrow" he asked, to
put a period on the discussion.
/ saw no one entering or
leaving his home that day but
there were several indications
that he was doing considerable
business. He cited several other
cases he was treating" He
gave me a receipt for my SIS
from a nuge book from which
many receipts had already been
torn.
What were these patients
getting? What had I gotten? 1
reported my interview to. six
veterans in marriage counsel
ling-a pSycniatric social work.
er, the supervisor Of case work