davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01
FAMOUS FABLES
BY Z. Z. EDGAR
TOO MILD: Humorist jaime

TOO MILD: Humorist James
Thurber attended q Broadway
opening with q friend. The play
was q bore from beginning TO
end.
What q wasted EVENING""
groaned Thurber's companion.
"Of all the dull. witless. I'M
imaginative and hackneyed
tripe I have ever seen. this was
positively the worsti"
Having settled his nerves
with this outburst. he turned to
Thurber and said:
What did you think Of it,"
II can't say I liked It that
much" said the humorist.
CLOTHES: Israel Prime Min
lister David Ben-Gurion dis
likes the trappings Of his Of
nee. Often he appears at his
desk wearing q shirt open at
the collar.
Once. however. at q diplo-
matte reception. he made his
appearance In the traditional
striped pants and cutaway. One
OF the diplomats. seeing him
for the first time in this natty
attire. stared with frank as
constituent.
you must forgive my ap-
pearance." apologi8ed Mr.. Ben
ourion. These are my work.
ing clothes.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01

Tomonov: Wife eompIsias because
husbend still refuses 10 decide upon
permanent job.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01
THE GOLDEN YEARS
/. Stocks Mean Work
! For Retired Investor

went back to 500. His profit:
$1,000 In q day"
Would you have had the savvy
to do this? Would you have
had the time to hitch UP the
blackboard and act so quickly
And another example," said
the retired broker. Say you
buy $4,000 worth Of stock in
the xYz corporation. Every
thing Is lovely. But the board
chairman Of KY Is playing
footsie with q red-headed sec.
Rotary and letting the nut and
bolt business so to pot.
The directors know all about
this. and they decide to kick
the chairman out and convert
the business 10 making 10
penny nails instead.
Changes Come Quickly
The brilliant men in the
stock market knew all this be-
fore you went TO sleep last
night. And sold their stock.
Before you know what's hap
pened. sometime next year, the
smart boys win be reaping 6
to Q per cent over In the next
county.
In BRIEF" he said. you had
better know what's going on
before you start playing around
with the stock market. And
you have to have q news ticker
at your elbow. and be alert 10
hours q day. before you know
what's going on :"
II you are tempted to buy
stocks. take this mans advice
10 heart. But he tells only
part Of the story. II you have
house money and want to sup
plement q pension with Il, 90 to
q reputable stockbroker task
the Chamber Of Ccmmercel, 60
TO your bank. or go to an in
yestment counselor. Say you
want TO get . regular income
from the stock market, not
play il. You can get. as Of now.
about 5 per cent. with reason
able safety.
But even then you can't buy.
go fishing. and forget 1t. Sup
pose you bought the stock Of q
conservative public utility that
has paid dividends for - years.
The political climate of the
country could change. and in
1860 or 1864. the Government
could push your company and
your dividends over o iva
dam.
You viii have to work at your
investment from here on.
tcopyrisht 1857. General Pastures
Corp
The Golden Yeen eppeen soeh
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01

picious. However. the diagnosis
cannot surely be made without
blood studies. The doctor viii
also want to check the acidity
Tor absence Of IT. In your
stomach. And perhaps also do
Q bone-marrow study TO ex-
anime your blood cells. ! would
certainly go in to see him,
especially II you have had one
or more Of the following symp-
toms: numbness in your legs.
o sore mouth, weakness and
early exhaustion. poor appetite,
pallor. shortness Of breath -
or this lemon-yellow color that
I have mentioned. Quite often
q good diagnostician's bunch
turns out to be correct. The
laboratory tests viii settle the
matter.
Until Doctors Minot and
Murphy Of Boston discovered
its antidote in liver therapy q
few decades ago. pernicious
anemia was a ruthless killer.
II you have pernicious an
emia land I hope the doctors
bunch is wrong today's treat
ment with liver extract and
vitamin B-l2 will keep 1t under
control.
Rslsassd By The Bell Syndicate. Incl
Tomorrow: Woman asks odviee
obOui possible III effect Of continuing
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01
How to
STOP KILLING
YOURSELF
Methods of Ending Leg Cromps
sy DR.. PETER }. sTEINcRoHN

Dear DR.. Steincr0hn
What are the causes Of leg
cramps and not being able
20 relax the legs at night?
] 70 to sleep at about 10 pm.
and wake . short time later
with this tight feeling In
either one leg or the other.
Getting up and exercising
until nearly exhausted seems
20 be the only remedy. After
such exercise the legs are re-
Taxed for the remainder Of
The night.
As remedies I have tried
hot baths which sometimes
help. Also, At various times,
yogurt. warm milk. brewers
yeast tablets, vitamin C, and
multiple vitamins. ! walk a
great deal during the day, !
have no worries, yet feel II IL
. nerve condition. Can you
suggest some help In your
well-read cOlumn-which Is
. much appreciated service.
Would q vibrator help? Or
heat? My age Is S.. Thank
you. Mr.. w. J. r.
The cause Of the nightly LEI
cramps often remains In doubt
! have known some patients
otherwise healthy. who suffered
these discomforts of and on To-
years. Examination disclosed
no cause.
However. when you went int
The history Of their eating hab'
its, you would often discover
that there was a definite lacl
Of calcium in their diet. Wher
asked 10 include at least q quar-
Of milk daily and generous por'
tons Of cheese their night,
cramps disappeared.
I have also prescribed O qui
nine tablet before retiring.
which has helped when nothinI
else seemed TO. You might asI
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01
BY THOMAS COLLINS

Il take my retirement Janu-
airy 5. which means + as good
IS through now" the man said.
MAMA and I plan TO hang
around until February, take a
trip to get out Of the cold. then
come back In the spring and
sell our house.
That's where our problem Is.
Prom the house and other odds
and ends wei have about S14.-
900 in good. hard money. We
need TO convert that into some
monthly income to help our
pension out. How?
"A savings account would pay
Us 2 per cent or so. A loan as
ISOLATION would pay us 3 or 4
per cent. But stocks are paying
people 5 per cent OF more. We
need that extra money.
The question Is: Should we
uuy StoCkSs
The answer. with an impor-
tant reservation. Is yes. The
difference between 2 per cent
and 5 per cent on $4,000 Is
about SIS O month. That's
money when you're on Q PEN
sion. The difference between ;
and 5 per cent Is about $40 a
month. That's money, too.
But you have to pay for such
things. That's where the reser-
walton comes In.
A retired stockbroker. who Is
now living on municipal bonds
instead Of stocks. sat under one
Of his orange trees the other
day and spelled out the reser-
vation.
Stocks Are Not . Game
The stock Market" he said.
Is not . boys marble game.
IT'S . tremendous business in
which brilliant men every day
make and lose more money
than the average guy ever
dreams Of having.
1T also Is an auction market
where the duh. reliable shares
Of dull. reliable corporations
are bought and sold.
But here's what happens:
The brilliant men were holding
. lot Of stock when the Presi-
dent Of the United States had
his recent illness. Say one Of
them was holding 1000 shares
Of q stock selling for 500 q
share. He was smart enough to
know. the minute the illness
was announced. that the stock
market would go down fast.
$50 he sold his 1000 shares
for 500 each. The price fell In
one day to say. $94 each. Then
he bought back the 1000 shares
ct that price. The Presidents
condition improved. The stock
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01

The Golden Yesn sppeon soeh
Wednesday,.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01

l-~~--.~~-~~u~-----~s~s~
daydreams. He realizes he l,
not rs smart as some Of thu
others. but he doesn't make the
extra effort he should make u
keep up with them.
] am sure he can do much
better work and ! try 70 push
him on. telling him how i'm.
portant Il Is for him to get an
education. These days a col
lege education is everything
and Icons brother viii soor
be starting college. I want
him TO go. too. but my wife says
it's no use trying.
Mrs. J. FL say we should
just leave Leon alone as far as
bis schooling Is concerned. He
finds the work very hard and
there's no sense making him
feel worse than he does about
II. He'll never be able to get
into college In o million years.
He told me so the other day
and he had tears In his eyes.
Why should we torture him?
MY husband broods about
Leon all the time. but I tell
him we should be grateful we
have one smart son. There's
no sense expecting big things
Of Leon. We should be glad II
he stays out Of trouble and Is
o healthy boy. Hell earn q Iiv-
ing. even II 1t isn't In q fancy
occupation. Everyone. includ-
ing his teachers. likes Leon
very much.
The Councils View
II Is not O good idea 70 hold
up an excessively high goal to
any adolescent and II Leon Is
now ut the bottom Of the class.
college does seem to be q too
high goal. II certainly does
seem wrong to torture this boy
by aiming at something he
feels he can't possibly achieve.
We disagree very much. how
ever. with Mrs. J. F.'s idea that
Leon should be Just left alone
as far as his schooling Is con-
cerned."
We are sure that Leon Is
better In some subjects than
others. He should be encour-
aged 70 develop these strong
points. Mr.. and Mrs. j. r.
should enlist the aid Of Icons
teachers to help him excel In
some way. Success viii do q
great deal for his personality
and his potential mental abn-
ity.
Just because Leon may not
be college material Is no rea-
son to believe he does not need
help In planning his future.
His parents should give q good
deal Of thought TO this matter.
Mrs. J. p. seems to take the
attitude that the main ques-
ton involved Is whether or not
the parents should be willing
to accept the ego blow OF hav-
ing q boy who is not too bright.
The real question Is how can
the parents help Leon to live
and work TO his fullest poten-
TALLY.
,copyTiEht 1858. General Features
Corp
Tomonov: Wife eompIoins because
husband still refuses 10 decide upon
nAfmonnnf iah
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01
Eh7uRz Rcz
JIM BISHOP:
REPORTER
Sputniks and New Rocket Fuels

I IL
The big story OF 1857. OF
course. was sputnik. When II
happened. ! was aboard the
0iulio Cesare making 10 knots
around the northern edge OF
Corsica. The ships newspaper
carried . one-paragraph item
out Of Moscow saying that the
Russians had launched q satel-
lite which was racing around
the globe ct $4,000 miles per
hour.
That was all. It didn't make
much Of an impression aboard
q ship full Of colored balloons
and paper hats and bubbling
wine. It made an impression
on me because. only I'VE months
before. ! had concluded q full
week Of briefing on missiles at
the missile command la Cali
fornia. II made q sickening
impression.
! had asked one Of the scien-
fists how far ahead Of the
Russians we were. He smiled
patiently. Prom what we can
see Of their engineering" he
said. they should be as adj
vanced as we are"
AlarmiSt, ] thought. He
wasn't, He was an ostrich.
On the blaekboards ct Ingie-
wood. scientists taught me the
ABC's Of missilery. High In the
Santa Susanna mountains. !
froze In fright as an intercon-
tinental missile engine blasted
and ! saw boulders on the OPP
posite mountain blacken from
the exhaust. In two minutes.
100000 gallons Of water were
force-fed onto the thick steel
pan beneath the engine TO keep
the pan from disintegrating
from the heat. After two min
utes. all but 10000 gallons Of
water had vaporized.
Danger Of Blaekmail Cited
In the Douglas plant. at Con-
vair. and In others I saw mis-
siles being assembled. They are
big. proud birds. When they
are ready. some stand 90 feet
tall. poised like pencils stand
ing on an eraser. They would
be ready. according to the
hints. In 1861.
Now. on board ship in a
world Of soft Mediterranean
breezes and big fiirtatious stars.
1861 was not soon enough. And
yet. according to the brass. the
missile program had been meet
ing all its headlines and 81
billion was being spent In 1857
to make certain that we kept
ahead Of the Soviet Union.
What. then. had happened?
What had gone wrong? I
thought about Il. sitting on
the boat deck that night. and
! have spent considerable time
thinking about it and reading
about II ever since. The con-
clusion Is inescapable: the
Russians have discovered a new
fuel.
The problems Of missilery are
these: % to blast the vehicle
out Of the air ocean above us:
t2) to design It so that II can
carry q i0-meeaton hydrogen
bomb in Its nose: go to make
II land exactly where its mas
ters want It to land.
These are separate problems.
Ny guess Is that we have solved
problems two and three, but
not No. l. The Russians appear
to have solved No. /, and we
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01

your doctor II he has had any
experience with a relatively new
drug called Orthoxine Hydro
chloride. In q report Of 200 pa
tients who had severe leg
cramps DR.. w. H. Lane. jr., Of
Arkansas found that cramps
were relieved by orthoxine in
1876 Of the patients where arte-
reosclerosis was a contributing
factor.
II the cramps persist after
you have tried these sugges-
tons for a few weeks I suggest
that you have a complete ply
steal evaluation. II is impor-
tant to rule out diabetes,
arteriosclerosis. Buerger's Dis
ease and a number of other
condition. II Is usual. how
ever. for these latter conditions
to cause leg pains only after
you exert your legs, while en-
gagged In your daily duties.
Pernicious Anemio
Dear DIR. Steincrohn: II II
possible 10 make 4 diagnosis
Of pernlci0us anemia without
taking q blood count? I am
q 62-year-0ld housewife and
I was terribly upset yester-
day afternoon when visiting
the Office Of a doctor who has
been treating my best friend
for I BART trouble. He took
one look at me and said that
/ should come In for an ex-
animation because there was
something about me that
made him suspicious that !
have perniciOus anemia. I
tossed about all night worry
Ing about II. Shall ] 70 IN for
. checkup? Mrs. X. @.
Typical pernicious anemis
patients have what we call q
"lemon.yellow" skin. Perhaps
that u what made him sus.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01
'AlWILI NOUNOTI
Man Wants
To Pusl, Son
Into College
THE PROBLEM

MR.. J. FL want TO push
Leon on.
MRS. J. F.-There's no sense
expecting big things Of him.
THE DETAILS
Mr.. J. -Four youngest boy
is somewhat Of a problem to US.
Leon Is II and is In the right
grade In school for his age.
but he Is always at the very
bottom OF his class.
Leon does his homework
every day. but ] can see that
his mind Is not on It. He just
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01

The FsmiIy Council consists Of q
Judge, . psyehiotrisi. three clergy
msa. . nevspapsr editor. . vemsn's
editor and two writer's. Eseh article
is . summory II on aetusl eass
history. The council reports On
problems that have been dealt with
By responsible agencies
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-01-01

Tomorrow: Woman asks odviee
oboui possible III effect Of continuing
use Of drug.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23
Mclaughlin Urges
Greater Zeal

District Commissioner Robert
E. Mclaughlin last night told
the National Association of
Universalist Men that the Uni
versalist Church must become
more dynamic and carry the
missionary spirit of its teach
ings to grow.
A Universalist himself, Mr..
Mclaughlin is a member of
the Joint National Commission
Studying the Proposed Merger
of the Unitarian and Universal
list Churches. He spoke at a
dinner meeting at the Occi-
dental Restaurant.
Mr. Mclaughlin said one of
the barriers to a merger is the
Unitarians feelsthere is nothing
forNthem to gain by union with
the UniversaliSts and they
would probably lose something.
He said they feel a merger
might blur the Unitarian pat
tern and hurt their progress
by this merger which is under
consideration.
The association held business
sessions yesterday afternoon at
the Universalist National Me-
Church here and heard
from a dozen States.
At the IL o'clock service today
at the church. the members will
have a part in the program as
laymen.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23
WHY ALL THE FUSS?
PhilodeI phio Judge
Gets Virginia Justice

HANOVER, Va, Mar. % (R),
"A Philadelphia police court
magistrate who decried "Vir-
ginia justice" earlier this
month, has been given a chance
to witness Virginia court pro-
eedure first hand.
Hanover County Judge j. L.
Landram yesterday continued a
reckless driving charge against
the magistrate, Lewis C. Mon
gelluzzo, 48, until April IS ito
give him a chance to come
down here"
But in Philadelphia, Judge
Mongelluzzo said he has no
plans to go back to Virginia.
II posted my bond and went
on about my business" he said.
"I'm no different from any
other motorist. If I don't care
to appear at a hearing, ! for
felt my bond. I'd be foolish to
60 all the way back to Virginia.
Why all the fuss?"
Judge Mongelluzzo was ar
rested February Is by a State
trooper. Justice of the Peace.
Mrs. Katherine Haley, wrote
the warrant and required the
magistrate to post $31.25 cash
bond for his appearance yes
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23

terday in Hanover County
court. The magistrate did not
appear.
The Central Police Court
magistrate in Philadelphia re-
portedly became irked at a
March Z extradition proceeding
when someone mentioned "Vir-
ginia justice"
II happen to be a victim of
justice in Virginia s.. I had
to post a bond down there be-
cause they wouldn't accept my
word that I am a judge. Not
only that. but had to go back
and straighten it out"
Marc Haley, also a Hanover
County justice and husband of
Mrs. Haley. said Judge Mongel-
luzzo was told after his arrest
that he would have to post the
minimum bond of $31.25 or be
held in custody for his APP
pearance in county court.
Mr.. Haley said the magis-
trate was treated courteously
and was not tried before him
or anyone else. Mr.. Haley said
he had no knowledge of what
Judge Mongelluzzo meant when
he said he had to go back
and straighten it out"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23
Pliers Jommed in Skull,
Boy Survives Operation

TUCSON, Ariz., Mar. % (R.
"A 12-year-old boy, to the
amazement of doctors, was able
to talk and sit up today after
an operation removing a pair
of pliers imbedded nearly an
inch into his skull.
Not only that, but Jack Fran
els told nurses at Pima County
Hospital all about his opera
ton. which was performed last
night.
1T is amazing" said DR..
Francisco Quiroga, who removed
the pliers. HE had a lot Of
damage. Some Of the brain It's
sue came out with the handle.
He should be unconscious and
in critical condition"
The surgeon said the boys
condition was "fair."
Later today, the boy under
went a second operation to re-
move a portion of a bone that
was TANNED into his brain by
the pliers. The second operation
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23
Roger to Lecture
At SuIzburq

DR.. Kurt Roger, professor of
music at Washington Mission
airy College, Takoma Park, will
lecture on American music at
the international Sum m e r
Academy of the Mozarteum
Foundation in Salzburg, Aus
tria, this summer.
DR.. Roger, an Austrian-born
composer and musicologist.
lives at 500 Eighteenth street
NV. His works have been per-
formed in the United States.
England, Canada, Austria and
other countries.
His Sonata for Violin and
Piano will be performed
Wednesday at the Pan Ameri-
can Union. Next month an en-
tire concert of his works will
be given at the University Of
Maryland by the Marine Band.
DR.. Roger, who has been an
American citizen since 1945,
teaches composition at the
Washington Musical Institute
as we'll as at the Takoma Park
College.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23
Red Cross Seeks
Volunteer Aides
For Hospital Work

The District Red Cross Vol
unteer Nurses Aide Service
yesterday issued an appeal for
daytime volunteers to train
for nurses aide duty at Chill
dren's Hospital.
Glasses now being formed
will begin at 10 am. Tuesday,
April Is, at the Chapter House,
2025 E street NV.
The 40-hour course. which
is given without charge, will be
divided into sections consisting
of classroom instruction at the
Chapter House followed by su-
pervised hospital training at
Children's Hospital. Glasses
will meet Tuesdays and Fri
days from 10 am. to noon, and
from 1880 pm. to 2:30 pa.
Nurses aides serve in hos
pital wards. clinics, and pub
lie health agencies assisting
doctors and nurses in giving
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23
Russians Ask
Moon Control

MOSCOW. Mar. % (P.-The
Soviet army newspaper Red
Star called today for interna-
tional control Of the moon and
nearby planets.
Red Star said they could be
used by 'reactionary forces of
capitalism for aggression
against the Soviet Union and
must, therefore. be placed out
of bounds or under information
al control"
The newspaper achoed the
Kremlin demand that the
United States abandon its mill
tary bases in Europe in ex-
change for Soviet agreement
to ban the use of outer space
for military purposes.
President Eisenhower has de-
manded the prohibition of the
intercontinental ballistic mis-
sile, Red Star said. Actually the
Eisenhower proposal was for
control Of outer space in gen.
eral and not a mere banning
of the ICBM.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23

actual nursing care to patients.
Among their duties are taking
temperatures. pulse rate and
respiration, bedside cure. and
assisting in various clinics and
in hospital emergency rooms.
Further information can be
secured by calling Executive
$4,000, Extension 308. from 10
am. to 5 pm, Monday through
Friday.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23
Fee Suit Contested
In Timber Case
BY the Associated Press

A former Oregon Congress
man, who last week shared in
a 10000 award for legal serv-
ices involving Oregon timber
lands. said today he will resist
efforts by two Washington
d. c., attorneys to claim a $780,
900 legal fee in the case.
A. w. Lafferty of Portland
said the action had been filed
in District Court by James P,
KEN and Monte Appel, Wash
ington attorneys. They are
asking 10 per cent of the Dis
trict Court award.
Mr.. Lafferty and Richard L.
Merrick of Washington were
awarded equal shares in the
100000 award for their part
in a suit connected with dis
tribution of some $5,000,00O in
impounded funds to Is West
ern Oregon counties from i'm
pounded Oregon and California
(O&C) Railroad land timber
sale receipts.
Mr.. Lafferty today received
a copy of a letter from Perry
w. Morton. Assistant Attorney
General in charge of the Lands
Division. stating he has asked
the Department of the Interior
to issue checks in the amount
of 100000 each to the former
Congressman and Merrick.
The remaining 100000 is be-
ing withheld by the Govern
ment, Morton said, to protect
itself against all contingencies
as a result of the Kem-Appel
action.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-03-23

was performed by Drs. Earl
Carlson and Ranulfo Reyes.
DR.. Quiroga, a 28-year-old
graduate of the University of
Mexico City, said the youngster
somehow managed to walk to
the hospital under his own
power with the pliers protrud-
ing from his head.
DR.. Quiroga said the pliers
handles entered the youngsters
skull.
HE said the pliers we're
jammed into his skull by his
older brother while playing, "
the doctor said, but I can't
see how it could have been
damned in that deep by a
child"
The Pima County sheriff's
Office is investigating the Incl
dent.
Barring postoperative infec-
tions, the doctor said the boys
chances for complete recovery
are excellent.