Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1958-09-16
BASEBALL
BEA T
BY BURTON HAWKINS
Madison Avenue VS.. Sports
BY BURTON HAWKINS

CLEVELAND, SEPT 16-MADISON AVENIE is tab
ing over the sports world The extent of the nfraton
was revealed the week end when it was announced
that henceforth pro football games will be interrupted in
the second half to provide the viewing public glimpse of
the shapeSt honed additional filter trans
something with exclusive chorina wet cold and delicious
or whatever wasn't exposed enough in the first half to
satisfy the sponsor
The prospect of achieving i'll will by this branchild of
the gray flannel suit brigade is unlimited
Forty thousand shverng customers who have plunked
uoWn $40 ticket aren't going to take kindly to being
refrigerated bit longer to afford the folks at home
another look at pushpu fast fast fast
relief or concentrated suds power with new, added
vactofazo.
The boys who rake it in by dreaming up no filter feed
back it's what's up front that counts deodorant adeout
because Of exclusive lactoan and the whites wash this
side of cloud 10 due to that secret ingredient paos-thas
soap backwards = could have purchased themselves
passed. of trouble with this one
The next logical STEP of course will be to assault the
ears of baseball listeners and viewers 1t currently is
possible for fans lowered around the tevon to scurry
to the Kitchen open the refrigerator door, clutch bottle
md the bottle opener grab glass; pour watch that pin
point carbonaon create hpsmackng goodness atop the
amber fluid and maybe smugge in sip between half
innings. All in 81 seconds, according to the script
*&**
THAT'S RATHER sporting suggestion, that ST.
second bit One of the fellows on our block boasts he
can through the whole routine 43 seconds but there's
suspicion among the neighborS that he has
wiley into keeping the bottle opener in the same spot
which strips the fun from it.
Anyway, this guy doesn't permit the children to play
in the area between the living and Kitchen makes
sure the bottles toward the front of the refrigerator
and bans the kitchen floor. With this sort of
sneakneSS he has become the neghborhood champ but
he's weakening in the late innings He has difficulty round
ing the dining-room table, listing to port bit.
It's been fun far While the game has been in prog
reSs there have been minimum of references to OH boy
what beer There has been baseball between CONNER
Gals but that dreadful day coming when there will be
commercials at unexpected moments catching the 57-sec-
od athlete reclining in that easy chair instead OF being
poised for the romp to the refrigerator
These upcoming surprises may create havoc in the
household leading to damp spots chairs and
rugs unquaed lager spilled This could lead to frc-
ton, unless the good is the type who recognizes
that all boys and that consequently it's impossible
to ignore the 57-second challenge
As got the drift of it, football officials will be aerted
to hold the for 80 seconds when the sponsor desires
to peddle underarm dantiness whittier teeth less
dandruf or the sheer delight of shaving
WHETHER THESE INTERRUPTIONS will be accom-
pshed by firing flares from the broadcastng BOOTH equip
ping officials with portable evision sets ordering the
game to be stopped precisely at sos pm and again at
i345 wasn't mentioned in the story read That's
detail however, to be worked out by crewcut
ling In one of New YorkS towering structures
can hear it now, applied to the World Series Mel
See BASEBALL BEAT, Page Al: