Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1957-09-12

Consider with your some
Of your parents. They have
been accustomed to helping
you make your decisions and
solve your problems. At a
time in your life when they
know, quite accurately, that
you need them most, you are
pushing them away. They
are ravaged with concern for
you because the choices you
make now will bind you all
your life. but you resent even
their interest. Give a little
on this. Talk to your par
ents and see If they won't
give q little, too. You must
have the freedom to make
your own mistakes but per-
init them to define for your
which mistakes are harm
less, If uncomfortable, and
which are irrevocably blight
ing.
One of the major wars be-
tween adolescents and their
parents is rules. You argue
tirelesSly about bedtime,
homework. allowances. house.
hold chores, and the curfew
on dates. You'll be skep-
teal about this. unless
you're extremely honest with
yourself. but you really want
rules. You're kicking at the
fences to make sure they're
really there.
I'm reminded Of something
a mother overheard her
daughter say in a telephone
conversation, when she was
explaining to another girl
that she couldn't 60 with her
to q late movie. IT just
can'tl" the teen-ager was
saying. MY mother really
cares about me. She doesn't
let me come home so late"
Another low blow that
parents have to endure is
that you seek guidance all
right but you never go to
your parents. Getting help
from mother Is a mark Of
immaturity in an Adde'S
cents book; getting help
from an outsider has the
stamp Of adulthood. You
get your help from q teacher,
an aunt, or even q fond
neighbor. You hold long and
earnest conversations. re-
vealing q labyrinth of in
trigue and examining in
ferences and intentions with
the insight Of the hypersen-
sitive. Be careful that you
are not exchanging the DOM
nation Of your parents for
the domination Of a stranger.
Some adults can't resist the
temptation to play Svengali
with young people.
Your friendships are in
tense. You ceaselessly ex-
change condolences and ex-
periences with young people
your own age. You can't
bear to be different from
them.
This urge for conformity
includes your parents. You
want them TO be exactly like
everyone else's parents, which
is unfair. Your mother never
looks right to you: Either
she dresses too casually or
too ornately: her hair style
Is awful; her figure disgusts
you. Kindly remember, young
lady, that she looked pretty
marvellous TO you the time
she sat up all night when
you were 8 and nursed you
through pneumonia. Try TO
realize that she will look
pretty wonderful again when
you've had a fight with your
husband and your pride needs
patching. Right now you feel
she's a hazard to your de-
velopment. It's her presence
that annoys you, not her
general appearance. II she's
wise. she'll wait you out pa
tientIy and put up with your
criticism.
/ suspect the most effec-
tive method Of combating
the anguish Of these trying
years is to get away from
interior thinking. It's natural
to examine every pore in the
mirror. to be desperately
anxious to be popular, to be
involved In a chain day
dream Of your own eventual
Importance. but you don't
have TO carry on that way all
the time. Figure out for
yourself the best way Of get
ting a release from yourself.
1t may be sports or 1t may be
worship, which includes for
me church, music, nature,