Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1957-09-13

10 10 kAAACAA . RuAt Va 4AAC 90
breathing, and it must and
will be examined by the
young and curious. I doubt
very much that any but a
minute minority Of young
girls really want to expert
ence sex in its fullest form.
! therefore have some advice,
some simple ground rules, on
the subject of control. First
Of all, don't be so foolhardy
as to trust yourself. You're
not made Of cast iron. you're
flesh and warm blood. Pro-
tect yourself by making sure
that you and your date are
never In q location where
outside influences cannot
inhibit you. Empty houses
and parked cars make ideal
settings for disaster. The abb
sence Of your mother and
father is not q license for
necking. Never neck because
you have nothing else TO do.
Make certain that there is a
good likelihood Of Interrupt
ton.
Unfortunately this area of
adolescence and sex Is the
one In which parents feel the
most anxiety and children
the most withdrawal. You
teen-agers chat glibly with
your mothers about super
fatalities and keep nine
tenth Of yourselves under
water. like icebergs. When
asked. How was the party,
dear?" you recite a roll call
Of who was there and threw
in a few details about what
someone wore or the feed.
You don't answer the ques-
tons that we're really asked:
Were you comfortable? Are
your manners and training
adequate to get you through
all situations? Did you have
any trouble in the back seat
after the party?" If you and
your mother have never been
friends. you'll never answer
these unspoken questions. If
you have been pals in the
past. for the sake Of the old
relationship reassure her.
She's been all-important to
you for most of your life: It's
hard to find herself so
abruptly a spectator.
Dating is a coupling de-
signed to help young men
and women decide on the
qualities they want in a part
ner for marriage. Too many
boys play this dead-serious
game as II they were judges
at an Atlantic City beauty
contest. It's like a scientist
searching for a cancer cure
and aiming all his research
at locating one that is pink.
1t leads to marriages of
strangers. both physically at
tractive in the wedding pic
ture and both galloping for
a fall.
Similarly, some girls have
such an overwhelming de-
sire for marriage that
schools seem to have little
value beyond that Of happy
hunting ground. This is
sheer shortsightedness. /
have no complaint against
early marriages as such, but
I am unalterably opposed to
young girls shortchanging
themselves on their educa-
tions. This is one Of the dan
gers inherent in dating steady
and the other risk is that
the couple may decide to
marry while the boy con-
tinues his education and the
girl supports them both. She
is making a tragic mistake.
/ know Of countless broken
marriages that have resulted
from such an ARRANGEMENT.
The girl doesn't mind the
hard work Of her life, but
the boy can't bear the load Of
gratitude he must carry. He
finds someone else, someone
with whom he can feel tall
again. It's a sad story for
both Of them.
All teen-agers are acutely
aware Of the strong pulse
OF sex within them. / am not
a person whose morals are
shaped by convention, but /
would sternly advise all Of
you to hold of much investi-
cation Of its force. You
mustn't let It dominate you
because this IA the wrong
time for 1t. A persons life is