Madison County Democrat. (London, Ohio) 19??-1958, 1957-04-23
A
CENTURY
OF Service To
MADISON COUNTY
Continuously
SINCE 1857
i OUR
"a [fT6TWN
SuDN THOTS

supN THoTS
After you live just so long
it seems like one doesn't care
who wins the battle of the
sexes. And no wonder parents
and teachers get together to
form PTAs-after all there is
safety in numbers and who is
harder on both than kids.
LEARNING 8
Pity the poor English teach
er-she has to compete with
movie cowboys who say "Ah
amt got none an ah don ex-
peck tub git my"
Matter of fact it's contagi-
Gus, this hill-billy talk. Stop
ped a teacher the other day
and inquired of her well being.
She said, "Ah feels jes fahne
now that ah've got me my
masters degree!"
OUGHT
Fellow rushed into a local
hardware store the other day
and said, "Give me rat trap
quick. I've got to catch a
train"
Dumb Dora who works there
replied, Sorry, sir, but they
don't make them in that size"
oooITY
It occurs to us that man
doesn't need brains as much as
money. Howcome? Well, if he
has brains some guy with
money will give him job and
if he has no money, people
won't think he has any brains.
You Just can't win, brother!
7?7?
What in the world is more
gratifying than to put on an
old jacket and find money in
the pockets?
MODERN AGE
Women wear pants, smoke
cigarettes, inhabit bar-rooms,
bet on the races, play poker,
fly planes, hunt, fish, work in
factories and run for office.
About the only thing they
don't do nowadays is chew to-
bacco and go to the mems
room.
WoNDERMENT
Wonder who on earth trims
the toe-nails for the fat lady
in the circus? And, while
we're at it, who takes care of
the caretaker's daughter while
the caretaker is busy taking
care?
YoRE
Perhaps the reason that
some of the oldtimers are con-
tinually hardening back to the
good old days is because at
that time the only strikes any
one ever heard about were the
Yukon and the California gold
rushes.
ABATEMENT
Well never cease to be
amazed at women who buy
stockings which are so sheer
as to look as though they
aren't stockings. And now
they're working on shoes
which make them look like
they're barefoot.
SUGGESTION
Always wash YOUR spoon in
the finger bowl and you'll
never get your pocket sticky.
HOLY MATRIMoNY
You know the honeymoon is
over when, while you're sitting
by the fireplace listening to a
good orchestra play, and the
wind whistling outside, your
better half looks up and IN
auires, did the men pick up
the garbage today?"
HEYWooD
Old Haywood Snugg, the
John D. Rockefeller of Darby
Plains, says that out where ne
lives things are so high that
when a purchase runs under
dollar, the man rings up mo
Sale.
INCOME
And just for the record (and
as you make out your income
tax return the government
payroll has now reached an
all-time high of one billion
dollars per month!
NEWSPAPER STUFF
We don't expect everyone TO
agree with the stuff they see
printed in our newspaper but
we hope they THINK about it.
We can't stop people from
thinking but we can start 'em
and that's what counts most!
TRUST?
"Of course, must ask you
for a deposit" said the land
lady.
Certainly" replied the ten
ant handing over the required
sum.
Thanks. Now shall we trust
each other or do you want a
receipt?"
LAST WORD
The only thing that you can
take with you when you leave
this earth are the things you
gave away while you were
here.