Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1957-01-23
The
Rambler
Wild Westerner
Routs Tenderfoot
By JACK JONAS


Vegas for the inaugural.
When he got in town, he
called a Washington friend.
Lets have a drink" he
proposed. The friend agreed.
Later, in the bar, Mr.. Swain
introduced a pal, QUILTED
like himself, in 10-gallon hat,
cowboy toys and a brace of the
fancieSt pistols ever seen in
these parts.
This one" Mr.. Swain said,
sis called Smiley because he
never does"
A friend of the Washington
man came by.
WELL" the new arrival said
to Smiley, surveying his toys,
where are you from? TeXas?"
Smiley leaped up, drew a
pistol and fired twice at the
floor. In the pandemonium,
even the normally placid bar
tender dropped a glass. AS
for the man who asked the
unfortunate question, he
hasn't been seen since. His
Washington friend would like
to tell him Smiley was shoot
ing nothing more deadly than
blanks.
Positive
An A. b. e. w. bus, in a
Memorial Bridge traffic jam,
began filling with acrid
smoke.
"Smells like burning rub
ber," a passenger said.
"Oh, no it isn't" another
answered, positively. ITS
carbon mOnOxide!"
The second speaker i'm
mediately threw up the
window beside him and
poked his head into the
fresh-and extremely chilly
--air. At the Virginia side
of the bridge the driver dis
covered a locked brake,
remedied it, and continued
the journey.
But the passenger with
the carbon mOnOxide phObia
wasn't convinced. He kept
Z his head out the window
until the bus reached his
stop.
Purudox
A Springfield, Va, lady,
writing about our piece on the
blizzard of 1899, says ii
prompts me to write this
note about one of my pet
peeves. You say the schools
were closed during that biz
gard week-but closed only
because of lack of coal, not
beiause the kids cooldn't gel
therel :. I wonder what kino
Of sissieS we're making of oul
children today. !"
About the only plausible
excuse we can see among the
plethora offered is that it,;
not the children, but progress
The kids could make it, but
the school buses today,S
youngsters depend on can't.
Seasonal
Members of the Fairfax
County Board of Super
viSOrS walked into their
meeting last week with their
ears and fingers nipped by
freezing weather. Before
them they found a proposal
for control of swimming
pools in the county.
Undaunted, but mumbling
it might be more appropriate
to consider ice skating, the
board bravely voted to take
up the swimming pool issue
at its February 6 meeting.
Cosy
Mrs. L. D. Ray of 622!
North Twelfth street, Airing
ton, is convinced cats arr
creatures of comfort, no mat.
ter what the danger.
Her family, ready fol
errands, sought the kitten Il
put it indoors out of the cold
They couldn't find it and Sc
off. When they stopped a
the post Office, a mile and {
half away, they heard a fain'
NEW. When Mr.. Ray lifted
the hood, there was the cat
cosy and warm, near thu
motor.
Rambling
Pasted to a checkout coun-
ter in a supermarket on Mac
Arthur boulevard was the
sign, mo Dogs Allowed" Anc
tied to one corner of the sigr
was a small mongrel dog.
The Business Mans Com.
mittee to sell tickets for thil
years Mats games report
splendid cooperation from tn,
Suppliers. The soft drinl
people, for example, agreed
to carry signs on their trucks
But the popcorn man couldn'