Madison County Democrat. (London, Ohio) 19??-1958, 1956-07-20
e OUR
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NEWS

NEWS
See by the papers that men,
bers of the House of Represen-
tatives in Washington raised
their salaries last year from
$4,000 to S22, 800 and now the
BARRIERS in the. House barber
shop have raised haircuts from
so cents to IS cents. Our heart
bleeds for these poor, unfortu-
nate congressman. 0 d dly
enough the Senators get their
locks shorn free of charge!
READING MATTER
We heard about a lady down
I'm Louisville, Kentucky, who
went to the local library and
asked for G.. B. Shaw's book,
Man and Superman." Sweet
young thing told her, Look
ovah theah, honey, we keep all
ourah comic books in that sec
tion!"
" W NJ w INs
Experience is a great teacher.
We never make the same mis-
take twice-we always make
new ones!
LIVING
If you would have two
blades of grass grow where
but one grew before-plant a
garden!
CUSTOM
It's a real American custom
that female must never ac-
cept money from one of the
opposite sex unless she is mar
ried to him but, boy, after
that it's every man for HIM
self.
OUCH!
First Goof: What has bow
legs, a yellow rear-end and
catches flies ?"
Second Same: DANCED if l
know What?"
First Goof: "A Chinese out
fielder, dope!"
WISH
Our ST. Petersburg, Florida,
correspondent, Lilly Belle, sent
us this one concerning young
Chicago boy who, when asked
If he wanted little brother or
sister, replied, We'll, if 1t
wouldn't hange mommy's
shape too much, l would like
a pony!"
FACT
If we would but admit it
-. one of the strongest argu-
ments for education is that it
keeps the kids out of the house
most of the day.
FUTURE
Tony Galento, the ex-prize-
fighter. recently had this to
say :. "Since I quit da ring I
loint lot of-woids. I amt no
dummy no more!"
CHASTE
A little old maiden lady was
very fond of goldfish so
much so that she kept whole
bathtub filled with the little
things. But what do you do
when you take a bath?" in
quired a friend Oh said the
little old lady, II just blind
fold them!"
COLLEGE
Even the college professors
never got their education in a
hurry-they got it by degrees.
MODERN AGE
One thing about these new
style ranch-type houses it
makes Ii lot easier for sister
Sue to elope. And we heard
about house in town with
one of those homely sayings
tackled on the wall which says,
BE 1t Ever So Humble,
There's Nobody Home"
REASON
The reason that they are
making the new cars with
power steering, power brakes.
power windows and power
seats is so that the owner can
have his mind free to figure
out way to make the pay
mentS
ADAGE
Give girl enough rope and
she'll hang herself around
your neck!
KID STUFF
Mother: (hearing little jim
mics prayers) ".And now ask
God to make you a good boy
tomorrow"
Little Jimmie: why, what's
going on tomorrow 2"
ANOTHER
And speaking of kids. we
once heard story about three
youngsters who were found in
a closet during a severe thun-
der storm. Father asked them
what in the world they were
doing in the closet and one re-
piled, Were in here forgiving
each other"
TT?
No use crying over split
milk from the cats p mt
of view anyway.
LAST WORD
One thing about growing old
er is that you need not worry
about avoiding temptation-ft
starts avoiding you.