Madison County Democrat. (London, Ohio) 19??-1958, 1956-03-06
= OUR
"a TOWN
kip sTUFF

NIL OFF
Ho-us e-to-house statesmen
have a lot of tough days. One
salesman, noticing a little boy
sitting on q curb, asked, Say,
young fellow, is your father at
homer"
: Youngster said, "Yup!p
Salesman rang the doorbell
for the better part of a half
hour but got no response. Fin
ally, he returned to the boy
and queried, Didn't you say
your father was at home?
Yeah, said the little man,
he is. but we live over on Oak
street,"
VIEWPOINT
Friend of ours says that he
has invested in a full-length
mirror for his bedroom. Says
that now he never goes to
work without his pants on.
OLD ADAGE
Oldest and still best of the
business axioms is this. :. (.
There is hardly anything in
the world that some man can
not make a little worse and
sell a little cheaper, and the
people who consider price only
are this mans lawful prey!"
SMALL TOWN
Man from the big city visit
ing London once told Main
Street sour-puss. This is
such a quaint little town! I
never knew that places like
this existed! It just goes to
show that one half of the
world doesn't know how the
other half lives!"
Old sour-puss cooked a
rheumy eye at the stranger
and said, "Not in this town,
mister, not in this town!"
FACT
Nowadays. when someone
tells you that a fellow is go
ing places it probably means
that his wife is visiting her
mother.
STATUE
The thin line between CLAM
our and the ridiculous is best
explained when we consider
how a famous general would
look II the statue had been
erected minus the horse.
PoLLYTicks
We've always wanted to
vote for the man of our choice
but the son-of-a-gun won't run!
GROWING
If your heir is unruly, the
best tonic is a brush!
FASHION
We are strictly in favor of
the exclusive" hat styles it
prevents the milliner from
making the same mistake
twice.
WlMMlN
A woman is a person who
can thread a needle in the
dark but who can't get the car
into a 12-foot wide garage.
YoRE
Remember way back when
a girl got herself vaccinated in
a place she thought would nev-
er show?
NUnisTisM
A nudist Is a person who
really doesn't have thing to
wear. and wears it!
MODERN AGE
Now they've gone and i'm
vented light bulb that will
last 1900 hours for Junior
to. leave on!
BEWARE
beware "bait' advertising"
says a magazine. According to
the Federal Trade Commiss-
ion, the best way to spot "bait"
advertising and selling is when
the following facts become
clear.
1. Product is offered at
startingly low price.
2. Salesman is reluctant to
show the advertised product.
3. Salesman disparages item
and tries to sell better one
A. Salesman says he has
only floor sample" and that
actual item will take several
weeks for delivery.
5. Salesman says item was
sold out quickly and suggests
something better.
If any of these things hap
pen to you : WALK OUT!
HOLY MArRlMoNY
Snow me q man VINO IL teH-
der and I'll show you a man
who's been in hot water for
about twenty years!
THIRD GRADE
Contributor sent this in.
seems two small girls were
studying and one asked the
other MARY. is water
works" two words or does it
have a hydrant In it?"
LAST WORD
This is the time Of year
when the candidates are will
ing to give you the shirt off
your back