Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1956-11-02
UccESS is WITHIN YOU
Showing Real Interest in Children
Works Better Than Silly Questions

creatures and If we don't want
to make our children neurotic we
had better get down of the
parental high horse and meet our
children, as it is put, at their
own level"
This is a cue to many parents
to begin encouraging their chill
dren to call them by their first
names. So one is treated to
the ludicrous spectacle of seeing
I7-year-old Martha come sashay-
ing into the living room and say
ing to her fat and 40-year-old
father, harnessed in his she'll
trimmed glasses and buried be-
hind the financial pages of his
evening paper. Chuck. dinners
ready"
| Today we know that you don't
become better parent by alb
dicating parenthood. We know,
too, that what, children need
most in their parents are grown
ups. adults, not just another
pair of 7-year-olds.
Children want to look UP to
their parents as sources of pro-
lection, guidance and love. In
our garden at home we have a
lilly pond, and / shall always
remember my own son Kenny
when he was 4 years old, looking
up at me and saying, as 1 stood
on the edge of the pond, II don't
want you to fall in the pool,
Daddy. because you love me-"
Strong, Dependable
He didn't say. because I love
you" The important thing to
this child, as to any child, was
that his parent loved him. BY
the same token the child wants
his parent to be strong and de-
Ipendable. He even wants him
to have authority Though that
word has a tang of profanity in
the lexicon of some latter-day
experts.
The child's portrait of his
parents as he would like them
to be is constantly revealed in
his own pride when he tells the
neighbor kids how much his
father knows or how skilled his
mother is and, too, in the primi-
tive boast. "I'll bet my father
can beat your father"
The obvious reason why any
child seeks qualities of strength
and leadership in his own parents
is because with these qualities
they can provide a strong, safe
home for him.
In Lincoln Park. Mich, just
south of Detroit, l met with a
group of teen-age youngsters and
discussed with them their views
of their own parents. Some of
their remarks were revealing:
'@The trouble today is your
ma says you can't do something
and the next minute she changes
her mind and let's you do it,
one boy said.
Gosh, no kid could look UP
to a father who's got a lot of
mush where his backbone should
be-" another chimed in.
"Why Shouldn't We?
A grinning realist among them
added. IF they let us walk all.
over them,s we're going to- Why
shouldn't we?"
The only boy who seemed =
feel he had something to boast
about was the one who said,
We'll, you guys aren't talking
about my pa. When he says
something he means it,
Talk to children anywhere
and you will quickly discover
that though they may enjoy
wrapping their parents around
their little fingers--if they can
get away with it-still in their
hearts they yearn for parents
who are strong and stable. They
are the first to condemn parents
VINO are too weak to raise their
own offspring.
The poet Kahlil Gibran wrote
of parents as 1.-The bows from
which your children as living
arrows are sent forth" And
Gibran noted that even as God.
the Archer. cloves the arrow
that flies so He loves the bow
that is stable"
In parental leadership we have