Madison County Democrat. (London, Ohio) 19??-1958, 1954-11-05

~SSAA
Funny that economic de-
pressionS always arrive just
when a lot of people are out
of work.
LIkkER
Things might be a lot differ
ent in this country if it
weren't for the heavy drink
ers - they spend one-and-a
quarter million dollars per
hour for headaches!
THANKSGIVING
Below are excerpts from
two letters written on Guadal-
canal which are prime exam
pies of what THANKSGIV
ING really is:
Guadalcanal, 1912:
1t was Thanksgiving Day on
Guadalcanal An officer enter
cd my tent to gripe and COM
plain.
Listen, Captain" / said,
you're alive aren't you? /
see you have both arms, both
legs. both eyes. both ears -
you have everything to be
thankful for" - 1t. w. w.
Willard, Chaplain u. S. N. r.,
The Leathernecks Came Thru
(RevelD.
Tarawa, 1913:
This is written while those
at home are sitting down to
Thanksgiving turkey. We
share that spirit of thanksgiv-
ing. Most of all, we are thank
ful to be alive. But for the
chance of battle, we would be
i'm one of the 5 cemeteries
here, or hanging grotesquely
from the barbcd wire in the
surf. ." Richard w. Johnston,
United Press dispatch.
HOLY MATRIMoNY
"MY life has been one long
struggle ever since ] got mar
ricd', said BeebledorSter.
How come, asked a by
stander
'J married : 'adv Wrestlerw
RATS
And now some guy is going
to publish Margaret Truman's
diary. It's getting so that all
the famous women in the
country want their intimate
thoughts exposed for profit.
LIVING
If you would be a successful
parent, raise your kids like
you would want your neigh
boris!
LOVE
Love at first sight isn't such
a remarkable thing unless you
figure that the parties, invol-
we'd might not go through with
it if they took a second look.
SELLING
No cvading the fact that we
live in an increasingly articul-
ate age. Gets a bit dismaying
at times. Latest is an organi-
Zation TO interSpense CONNER
cialS betwixt musical select
ions on juke boxes. And. Of
course, there's the vending
machine that talks. You drop
in a quarter for a pack of Gig
arets. A record cautions: Don't
run short. Better buy 2 packs
while you're herer
Some Sideline observers are
wondering whether auto in
dustry is getting full value out
of extra horses they are har-
Messing under hoods. Recent
survey indicates average own
or can't quote offhand horse
power of his car - and does
MT much care. Auto product
ion is tentatively pegged at
Sc million for '55. Motor We
hicleS registration will hit an
all-time high this year. with
an estimated 5S,129,00O; a
3.3% gain over SO.
Supermarkets are trying
more and more gimmicks to
wangle larger proportion of
household trade. An Eastern
chain bought 10000 tickets to
football games; offered $3.50
seat free with SIS purchase;
sold out quickly. Pressure of
competition is forcing mail
order houses into loWer-price
fields, with heavy wares TAX
ing chief cuts.
A New York salon now does
face-lifting on the instaIlment
plan ~ that is, YOU pay on i'm
stalllnents: the lifting, pre-
sumably, is done in a single
heist.
HUMNNI
A bore is a person who is
an expert on a subject i'm
which you aren't interested.
LANGUAGE
There is one other Inter
national language besides
music - the sound of a cash
register.
LAST WORD
Lets have just one more
for the ditch!"