Evening star., 1953-09-20
For Freshmen
Friendliness
Is Key to
Acceptance
By Kite Turmoil


With school in swing, are you
set to go into action, to get into
a chosen crowd, a certain club,
or a group that's right for you?
If so, it's a help to know that
most feel the same and will be
glad to go along with you.
Chances are 9 to / you will be
accepted" if you try to be
friendly.
Studies show that In early
teens you are apt to want to
be popular with many, a stand
out in quite a few groups In
later teens you are more likely
to be content with select few
in a smaller crowd.
How to make friends in estab-
lished groups is major fresh
man bother. according to senior
high findings of Fred Sampson,
teacher and counselor in Los
Angeles
Freshman worries reported by
students for the survey went this
way:
When I was a freshman, I
had as many worries as father
trying to support IL children"
quipped Mary. Like most I
wondered: Will I be successful
in making and keeping friends,
quickly, easily? Will the kids
really like me? Will it be a
struggle to get into a good
crowd? Will I get used to new
ways and will they get used to
me?"
II was worried about how to
get along with a group" Jane
recalled. THE one who had
been my best friend, with whom
I spent almost all my time, had
just moved away"
II was lonesome from the start
of my first year in high school,"
admitted Bob. MY NON began
to ask why I did not bring my
new friends home. My excuse
was that they lived too far away.
I always had a feeling that even
when did walk with a group,
I was on the outside all the
way"
All the above students solved
their freshman worries with the
friendly approach and live in
tereSts. These can whirl you into
plenty of group activity.
Nobody can press a button
and jet-propel you to top popu-
larity. But counselors and we'll
liked students agree it is wise to
make friends gradually. After
you get to know one, two or
three, it's easier to get along
with the crowd.
Traits that rate with school
friends, according to New York
City studies, include:
l. Friendliness. A big word
that begins with little things like
loaning an eraser.
2. Tolerance. You are ready
to accept all types even if they
are not at all like you.
3. Enthusiasm. You don't
"clam up" at rah-rah time for
football rallies.
4. Cheerfulness. You skip tales
of woe. You don't take the dim
view.
S. Sense of humor. If you
make a mistake, you give it the
laughoff.
6. Outward looking attitude.
You think more of others, less
of you.
For practice, apply these ideas
from DR.. Reynold A. Jensen, Uni
versity Of Minnesota professor,
an authority in youth guidance.
DR.. Jensen says:
First assume that every one
likes people and wants to be
liked. 1t is basic human nature
to feel happier. more contented
If accepted Operate on the
basis that all will want to be
friendly with you if given a
chance to be.
I'm new, strange situation
assume that others might be a
bit shy, too. Ease the unfamiliar
with a smile, compliment, a
pleasantly. If anything embar-
RAISING pops up, treat lightly be-
fore it can turn into a crisis"
Permit others to be themselves
as you want to be. Don't insist
that they think, talk or do like
you. If there is a misunder-
standing, bring on the patience.
Give time a chance to help ease
any small differences.
If disturbed by the thought
you have no friends, waste no
time on the sorry-for- rou-
tine. Ask yourself: why should
people like me? What is there
about me that might appeal and
make them want to know me
better? What do I want from
them?" This might help you to
face up to the fact that you are
seeking personal gain. To do
that can spoil the finest Of
friendships and destroy team
spirit in any group.
Give yourself time to get into
groups with whom you can share
lasting interests. If efforts to be
accepted by certain crowd fail,
figure that is not the one for
you. Until you find your right
group, go on being pleasant,
agreeable whenever you see the
daily opportunity. Be so friendly
to many that you'll never feel
lonely.