Madison County Democrat. (London, Ohio) 19??-1958, 1953-06-26
e OUR
6[T6SWN
pEER-DEAR!


pEER-DEAR!
Reindeer walked into a bar
and ordered a dry martini.
Plopped a. .five-spot on the bar
and bartender took same and
deposited it in the cash reg
lister = forgot to give any
change due to shock of seeing
reindeer.
Reindeer finished the mar
TIM and turned to leave. Bar
tender said, Say, you're the
first reindeer I've ever seen in
a saloon!"
Reindeer answered nastily,
'Yeah, and at these prices
you're not likely to see an
other very soon!" (Thanks to
Mrs. McMurray)
TAR HEEL
Some days a feller can't lay
up a cent. Heard about
friend of ours who went down
to the grocery store in a near
by town to get a loaf of bread.
Fellow was wearing his bed
room slippers at the time and
when he started across the hot
street, his slippers stuck in the
tar and he walked right out of
them! Now this is bad enough
but think of him putting his
tarry feet back into the slip
pers-which he did! At last
report he had sent in, his ap-
plication blank for member
ship in the Blackfoot tribe.
RATIONAL
AS long as you aren't inter-
ested in it-there are two sides
to every question.
coMMUNIQUE
Air mail letters never ap-
peared even in the dreams OF
the whalers and their wives
whose homes were on Man
tucket Island. They tell about
the correspondence carried on
between a whaleman in the
Pacific and his wife at home.
Dear Ezra" wrote the wife,
where did you put the axe ?"
Fourteen mos later the hus-
bands letter came with this
question: Dear Martha, what
do you want the axe for?"
Two yrs later the wife re-
piled, Dear Ezra, never mind
about the axe. What did you
do with the hammer ?"
GALS
And remember, girls, wnen
you make remarks that are
un-called for :. SO will you!
But nothing makes man for
get passing fancy than some
thing a little fancier.
WIsEMAN
Man named Clayton Rand
says-'When peace comes it
will spring from the human
heart. We will never purchase
world peace nor buy goodwill
with gold"
INVENTION
And now they've gone and
done it-made a silk purse out
of a sow's ear. How? Scientist
reduced the bristles from a
pigs ear into viscose from
which spun rayon is made. Re-
suit? An artificial silk hand
bag.
LOVE
Dear Gertrude" the letter
read, II love you with all my
heart. / would swim the ocean
to be with you, climb the high
est mountain etc ETC." At the
end of the smelly prose was
this-"P.S. I'll be over tonight
If it doesn't rain!"
SHAGGY
A man had his new dog out
for walk when he came to a
river. He threw a stick in for
the animal to fetch. To his
establishment instead of plung-
ing in the dog walked out on
the surface of the river and
retrieved the stick. Not be-
lieving his eyes, the man
threw the stick again. Again
the dog walked across the
water and fetched it.
Where did you get that
dog?" asked a passerby.
II bought him for a hundred
dollars" said its owner proud
ly.
We'll, you'd better get your
money back" said the strang-
er. you've been taken. That
dog can't even SWIM"
VIEWPOINT
The inimitable Beatrice Lily
sat in New York restaurant
with a beautiful young woman
of her acquaintance. An artist
spied the beauty and sent a
note to Bea, who is that mar
velous, gorgeous creature ?"
When the answer came back,
1t had only one word-"Mew
LAST WORD