Jackson advocate. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1939-current, 1953-01-24
j P
A n D
D o W n
IA RIS H
S 7 R EE
BY PERCY GREENE


NIGHT: My Grandma used to have
the knack of saying to me, Son.
things amt always what they seem
Here lately | been reading about
"falsies", and l got to thinking a.
bout what I'd read, and what nv
grandma said when one Of them
lushous curveaceous creations of
the opposite gender glides into nv
spot to divert my attention from
my fish and beer. Now, I've al
ways knowed something was going
on IN the bosoms of the opposite,
even out on the 1olks of the creek,
but deese hyar late falsies Pm
talking bout is the kind that you
can blow-up, and make'em the size
you want Now, if the don't
never advertise this air kind |
never would'er got round to writing
this piece, cause until the adver-
tised | used to wonder what they
were stuffed with: cotton, old
clothes or some other kinder
something, but | never got around
too, or in the place where | could
make a reliable investiga ton. Now,
with this rubber kind | found
out that they can make'em the size
they wanna, where they don't come
naturally equipped, since | always
figured that the size of the female
chest and the resulting effect on
the eye is the province of man,
while | was eating my Fish and
drinking my beer and thinking |
was startled by the thought, when
| found M'self asking m'sef, when
was the girl-friend, while she's
harnessingup gonna git round to
the point Of asking the boy-friend,
as these big enough. Another
thing that | got to worrying a.
bout is the effect on SIGH vaporous
creations on the fine art of ro-
nance. A fellow will tolerate al
most limitless acting up by his
Henry-J, T-Modle, Strip-down, or
even his Cadalliac, but not many
can cherish the idea of their be-
loved coming in on flat. More
| thought about the more it look
ed lack to me that it's impossible
for a fellow to take a real "heart"
tumble when his head is wonder
ing about how many pounds of air
she's sporting this time. Course
the ad didn't say but the things
might be puncture-proof, which |
figure they is on account of some
fellows who make a pretty
thorough examination of their
property, probing of course for
switch blade knives, ice-picks, and
the like, and the ruff hands of
farm boy, plasterer, brick-layer,
would almost certainly make them
things pop :. Talk about fizziling
out, that'd be fizziling out with
three Us.
Yes, Sir, these hyar air-filled
falsies ads is causing me to take
a third look now, insteader my usu-
ally two, and | don't woke-up on q
new interest in the makeup Of
the feminine frame, but at the same
time | done learnt what my Grand
ma meant when she used to say,
son, things amt always what they
seem Ell che
1T Amt THAT WAY NO
MORE: The ex-wife of Willie
Lewis, popular Dotty Cab man,
who got her divorce the other day,
is telling those who call her name,
that it amt that way no more, its
Miss Arlene Picket, just like it
was in the first place.
WHAT EVERYBODY is SAY
ING: Everybody who was out that,
including the women, is saying
that Ray Miss Johnson, the tall
est, most friendly, and most court
eous waitress along the Old Ave
nue., was the best and most be-
comingly dressed woman at the
Elks scintallatingly successful
dance out at the Rose Room last
Friday night.
WHAT THE HEP KATS ARE
SAYING: A couple of smart boys
"fell" down the road the other day,
as the saying goes, and one of 'em
ran off and left his Fishtail Cadal-
lilac, among the local "kats" they're
saying, "He put the heat on his
own self with his "Fishtail' cause
smart as he thought he was he
didn't know the difference between
"Hussler" and a "Pimp".
EEKTY QUOTATION